#man i just love all the fun colores and designs in adoptable spaces maybe i should try making adoptables some day
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Cute guy, starry bunny
#my art#man i just love all the fun colores and designs in adoptable spaces maybe i should try making adoptables some day#i am too tired to actually draw well so have this doodle#ill go sleep now#eepy
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night at the museum: Kamunrah rises again review
-i was binging the hell out of the night at the museum franchise (I chose to start with Smithsonian museum arc (2) then iâll end with one). I watched the fourth movie and have many thoughts, as someone who loves this franchise to bits. (If you dont see mentions of the first movie its bc i havent seen it yet from my movie marathon)
1. The timeline is hella off im so confused about it. Nick is in highschool but NATM3 he was going to college?? Laa is there so it canât be post NATM 2. If it was post NATM3 the best solution to this problem is having the adventure set IN THE UK???
2. I honestly am confused why kamunrah was revived again such a strange character to bring back i mean he was already dead before why bring him back?? (He was so iconic in the 2nd movie. Has funny bits in the fourth but third act bore me sorry) I genuinely wish there was a different bad guy instead
3. Infact i genuinely wish they had a small series for post NATM3 arc wherein its about the British museum rather than our main cast. Theres so much room and potential to introduce interesting historical figures too! Heck even make some of the animal statues talk that would be interesting (i doubt thats possible even with the tablet but shush) (is this an excuse to bring back rebel wilson to be the night guard-maybe Jdjfjsjdk/lh)
4. I love Octavius design he is not ugly to me at all infact he looks amazing in the movie! I love his face and his hair they look good. (I question why Jed is ginger and clean shaven, hes better off looking scruffy and scrappy looking) SIDE NOTE I LOVE THEM ADOPTING A CAT IT WAS MEANT TO BE !! (Their dynamic was off but them being clingy asf to each other made things less unberable)
5. Sacagewea and Joan of arc be lookin fruity in that one scene I see yall HDDJSJ, cute momment too. I love their respective character designs they are very fun plus Sacagewea is more plot relevant for once im glad for that:âD. Ik Joan of Arc wasnt there for the previous movies but my only answer to that plothole is shes also a new exhibit that was installed before NATM4. Or she could be in the British museum AKA AN EXCUSE TO HAVE JOAN AND LANCELOT TO INTERACT BRO THAT WOULD BE COOL
6.i love these movies but NATM4âs final fight scene wasnât as impactful as the others. No.2 was so fucking good at their fight scenes the characters battling it out with a good amount for both sides, theres different spotlights for the characters even if its one second. The third movie it was more of a chase scene ft. LION STATUES BEING BIG CATS GAHHH<33 and Lancelot identity crisis poor man. This fourth one felt like a fight you see in every cartoon or show, just felt not as creative? Except when Nick destroyed the bird soldiers eye with arrows that was cool.
7. WHY DOES DEXTER NOT LOOK LIKE A CAPUCHIN??? He looks like a generic orange or brown ish monkey. I looked up how they look like irl and they tend to have multi colored fur so his design rlly confused the hell out of me. I genuinely love capuchins bc of dexter and able (choosing them over chimpanzeâs just saying)
8.Lightning round bc I RAN OUT OF SPACE: Mia looks cool (wish she was used more in the story), Akmunrah not being there is so saddening, Nick and the bi sticker âą, Fun call back to the subway scene very cute, I love the oil painting joke its corny and useful to the chase, OFFENDED THERES NO BIG ANIMAL IN THE MAM MUSEUM EXCUSE??đđ theres always a big boy in there wdym (Rexy, Octopus, Trixie),Comic convention joke was my fave its such a cute moment
Heres some photos yey!! ok im done i spoke too much on this-did not expect such passion over it!!
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S3 ep5
Current emotional status: FEAR
Cthulu Max has been on the rampage for a whole week!?
Ew, the narrator
Oh man, are they sending the airforce after him?
I really like Cthulu Max's design
Momma Bosco đ
Oh hey, Norrington and Papierwaite are alive.
Superball are you saying you tried to send the Maimtrons up Max's--
Also he's acting president while Max is... deposed of.
Superball is only giving Sam until 6am :(
Featherly!
"Wandering around the moleman tunnels is no fun without Max."
"You got it all wrong, we're trying to help Max." "We will help him... to a generous serving of ass whooping."
"That is one rabbit who will be multiplied... into 2,000 smoldering pieces."
Carol ran off with Blustet
"I only want her to be happy, is all." Aw, Curt
Superball just admitted to having separation anxiety from Max
Ok Momma can't come but Papierwaite and Norringron can.
I like Norrington :)
GASP
Is it?
It is!
SYBIL!!!!
RETURN OF THE QUEEN
Oh, she is very pregnant
She was a wizard at one point?
She's gonna help!
Superball there's no such thing as acceptable losses
Abe has his body back
"Four score and seven tons of raw power"
HE CAN FLY NOW!?
Sybil, I love you, but why did you mod someone else's car???
Grandpa Stinky I love you
Oh, he just handed us the recipe for once.
Asdfff the spore maxes swarming Grandpa
They stole Grandpa's hotdogs
"We must feed the host! Piglets and sphinkters make us stronger!" "We regret nothing!"
Grandpa hasn't slept in three years
Sam just casually taking the last of Grandpa's corndogs
The spores are trying to get it
Lol Sam slapped them
Sal's alive!
He's hiding from Sam :(
Lol we can control Cthulu Max with Corndogs
Ew, the cornstarch got mixed in with the giant puddle đ€ą Looks gross
Love how Sybil completely ignores the Flaming Max head
Also the look of disappointment on the spore's face made me laugh
Fifth trimester???
The way the one Max spore by Grandpa's truck is bobbing in circles with his mouth open is making me laugh.
Sam showing concern for Sybil because sheâs preggers đ„ș
Her being pregnant with Abe's child implies that statues have working genital in this universe
She put a weiner scented airfreshener in the desoto
At least Sam and a Max spore seem to like that (of course they do)
"Sybil you're the best!" Hell yeah she is!
Sam's mind went to the color bar codes to prevent being traumatized by Sybil's oversharing
We drowned the desoto
Asdfgh Sam just botched slapped one of the spores for trying to say "that's none of your damn buisness."
Ew, Max's spine is pointing out
Oh hey, Satan and Jurgen
Why is Jurgen wearing his old fashioned clothes instead of his emo clothes?
Lol Sam snuck into frame to shout "Go Mets! New York rules!"
"--besides it's just a good and noble thing to do." "You're not familiar with my previous work, are you?"
"Sam, what happened to you to make you so cynical?" Gee, Jurgen, I wonder what could have possibly happened.
Oh so the water tower counts as vegetable oil because Momma did something to it
Pfft we can replace Satan's microphone with a corndog
Omg they jumped off the building to avoid Max
Oh, they're fine, and the oil is in the giant puddle.
I'm thankful to Featherly for giving us an egg but I'd have preferred not to watch him lay it. Granted it was just in a cartoon way but he still made weird noises
Also TRANS FEATHERLY 2021
"I desperately wanted to see that, sir. Ask him if he'll lay another one."
Oh hey, the Flaming Max heads helped heat up the giant desoto corndog
Since I'm playing this in 2021 the Maimtron's song references are super dated, which defeats Superball's efforts
Oooh! A unique opening sequence???
Oh this music is jazzy af
Sam really doesn't like the Max spores
Sam how do you already know what Max's insides look like???
"Even when he's not a collasal monster Max's food comas can last for weeks."
Ok we wake Max up with the coffee beans, right?
Yup!
The gi Max spore is so sad he doesn't get to come đą
"But I'm a horrible monster!"
"I suppose Max's brain always looks like a living room?" "Well, Max is host to all kinds of weird parasites, and he likes to he a good host!" WHAT
No really, this brings up so many questions about lagomorphs. Are they some kind of Symbiote or something?
And a previous episode confirmed Max is amphibious
Max has tumors!!!
It shocked Sam!
"Eugh! Get away fake Max!" "Do you find my warmth... alarming, Sam?"
"What do nightmares taste like, anyway?" "Pepsi"
Max wants to be author đ
He also writes fanfiction about Flint đ€Ł
I'd unironically read his books.
Tina Belcher voice: Friend fiction
Max has an experimental fusion jazz band???
"He just killed a great white shark--"
Max being completely unable to describe a woman is very gay of him. Good for him.
Max's brain teleported everyone to different parts of the body.
Found Sybil in the gym/legs
The brain is broadcasting Sam's thoughts???
Sam couldn't think of a joke for the medicine balls :(
"Wow Max is looking pretty buff. Would it be too weird if I asked him to turn around?"
Sam! Stop thinking bad things about Sybil's pregnancy she can hear you you putz!
She's upset with him now
"Can you believe this guy?" "I find the entire situation to be very contrived and misogynistic." Same spore Max, same.
Sam stop being so mean omg!
"I changed Sybil, I totally get the whole parenthood thing now." "Really now?" "Tax deductions."
In Max's inventory now
Y'know, I never really thought about it as a storage house
Hit The Road reference :3
Baby roach hatched in
"Pa..papa?" "Now I am little champion, now I am!"
Max has a Maximus shrine
Sam turned into a roomba!
Aw, he named it Sam Jr đ„ș
We won Sybil back through his love of Sam Jr
Found the conjoined twins
Huh, Max lost as eye. Does that mean he has a glass one, or do lagomorphs have regenerative abilities?
Pfft we have to play twister to control his arma
The brain is messing with things again
Oh, we need a roach to operate the game because of radiation
Well, let's kidnap Sal
Oh, poor Girl Stinky. She's really going through it
Aw, Sal feels bad
Sal?
Honey, are alright?
He's dying???
He's not immune to irradiation!?
Oh no, he's gone
I'm so sad đ
Gotta pick up Sam Jr. Before I control Max
They mad Max do a magical girl pose
Ugh the narrator is back
Wait, what?
He's Max's brain??? SUPEREGO???
WHAT
"I was always ignored" Yo if my super ego was as pretentious as you I 'd ignore it too đ€
He wants to kill himself and Max???
I know Max had a self loathing complex but holy shit
The super ego is perfectly fine with destroying half the east coast what a jerk
Just noticed Sam's tie is red. Had no idea about this while drawing PI!Sam lol
We have to help Max get his memories back to use the ASTRO projector
Skunkapes has three Sam clones imprisoned
Sam had canon ocd?
Gasp Gordon???
No, it's Sammun Mak
I love him, little child tyrant
Just make him a mobile brain in a jar and let Sam and Max adopt him
Why is Grandpa here?
He isn't talking like Stinky
Too polite
Sam sees it too
He's a space gorilla
They switched brains?
Found the cloning g chamber
Let's go to Momma's first
CONE OF SHAME CONE OF SHAME CONE OF SHAME
Superball is "wracked with guilt"
"Keep it together Superball. Sam will be able to save the day. He always does."
Ok, let's go to the cloning facility
I'm still thinking about poor Sal yo
FLIIIIIINT!
He's punching space apes!
Girl Stinky really playing up the evil Mistress role
The doggleganger has a bomb on him!!!
Wait so Girl really is a mermaid??? I thought that was just her aestetic
God I love Flint
Haha we tricked Skunkape with scooby doo villain tactics
Got the robot
Her water broke... and it was pennies
Max wants to save Sybil! đđ„șđ
Super Ego is here
Oh now he wants to save Max
The only thing here are those records
Super Ego waved goodbye
Cthulu Max is cute when he cries
Wait What?
His head is on fire!
The maimtron hit him!
He waved goodbye... and teleported away.
He exploaded!!!!
He promised he'd take Sam with him and he didn't!!!!
AAAAAAH
I thought the dead Max thing was popular angst fanon fic thingy!
We're cloning Max?
It didn't work đđđđđ
Superball ran off crying
Oh God the credits are just Sam walking sadly what the hell
He's not even stopping to fight any crime đą
đđđ
God the way he's clinging to himself
What?
The elevator???
MAAAAX
he's back???
Past Max???
He blew his Sam up???
Wait hold on I'm glad they're together again but this doesn't fix anything
There's so much trauma from this season
All the horrible things that happened during 301-304 happened in like 3 days tops, then Sam had to deal with Max being a monster for a week before watching him die!
And the new (?) Max had BLOW HIS SAM UP!!!
And they left the franchise like that for a decade????
What the hell?
I want to be happy but this shit is going to consume my brain for the next week at least what the hell
Aaaaaaah!
Like maybe they really do just brush it off but it feels unlikely
I know Max has a connection with his other selves so it'll be easier for him to adjust but certainly Sam is going to notice the discrepancies since he doesn't get the same deal
Someone told me there were multiple endings hold on
Aw, they walked off into the sunrise together
But still
AAAAAAAAH
#sam and max#freelance husbands#sam and max freelance police#sam & max#sam & max freelance police#freelance police#lee plays sam and max#305#what the hell#flint paper#agent superball#momma bosco#sybil pandemik#sal s&m#general skun ka'pe#girl stinky#sammun mak#don't @ me I'm crying
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A Twelve-Legged Matchmaker
Summary:Â Killian Jones has an undeniable crush on Emma Swan. He just needs a little nudge from man's best friend to act on it. Rated T for language. ~4K. Also on AO3.
~~~~~
A/N: Presenting my entry for the @cspupstravaganza! Huge thanks to @profdanglaisstuff to organizing such a fun event. This was a fun one to write. As always, extra kudos to @snidgetsafan for her phenomenal beta skills.
Tagging the usual suspects: @thisonesatellite, @scientificapricot, @teamhook, @kmomof4, @thejollyroger-writer, @snowbellewells, @winterbaby89, @awkwardnessandbaseball
Enjoy, and let me know what you think!
~~~~~
When Killian Jones decided that heâd like a pet - a dog, specifically - Bonny was not exactly what heâd had in mind.
It wasn't like he had a particular dog in mind when he went to the local shelter; mostly, heâd trusted an acquaintance who worked at the kennel would steer him towards a companion that would suit him best. David had suggested the idea in the first place when Killian had expressed loneliness after Liam had moved to Providence for a job, and had seemed more than happy to help. That's not to say that he didn't have an idea of the type of dog he was looking for; a puppy, something that would grow up to be at least midsize and not shed too much. A man's dog who he could take on runs and hikes and his boat. Maybe a labrador.Â
Bonny, however, has different ideas.
Bonny technically shouldn't have been in the side room where all the puppies romped around - she was full grown at three years, after all - but her size hadn't looked too out of place. Long-haired dachshunds didn't get that large after all, unless you were measuring in spine length. He'd been sat on the floor, letting all the wee pups come and check him out and contemplating the pros and cons of a labrador-weimaraner mix when Bonny had sauntered right over to curl up in his lap. One look into those big eyes, especially when coupled with those soft and floppy ears, and Killian had known he'd be going home with a very different dog than heâd expected. So he'd filled out the paperwork and bought all kinds of supplies and explained to a very attentive dog that a man has his limits and referring to his dog as Precious was a line he just wasn't willing to cross, and the little dog had been his. Bonny, after the fierce lady pirate Anne Bonny. A proper sailor's name for a less-than-proper sailor's dog.
(He will say, his good girl had taken to the water like a pro; there's a whole album on his phone after their six months together of Bonny on the Jolly's deck, all decked out in her life jacket. Yes, he's now a man that dresses his dog in a life jacket. No, he doesn't care what you have to say about that.)
Bonny may not have been the dog he expected to adopt, but there's no doubt that she's the right dog for him. She's an affectionate little thing, a true cuddle bug at heart, and even if he has to wrestle half his bed back from her - really, his dog takes up an absurd amount of space for such a small creature - he wouldn't have it any other way. There's just something about the trust that she so obviously has in him and the way her entire back half wiggles with the force of her happiness when he comes home after a long day of work.Â
(Thereâs also the added bonus that sheâs already housetrained; the details of that process werenât at the front of Killianâs mind when he first decided that he wanted a puppy.)
There's other unexpected advantages that come along with pet guardianship as well - namely the ability to get closer to his stunning blonde neighbor.
Before anyone makes any mistaken assumptions, it's not like that. He didn't adopt the dog as a ploy to pick up chicks - though he has to admit, if that was his aim, he couldn't have picked a better dog and a worse target. Emma Swan lives two doors down in a little cottage with her young son - Henry, if he remembers the name correctly. He'd been smitten from the moment the moving truck had pulled up. That's how he'd met David too, actually, his acquaintance at the kennel. He's still a little uncertain about the relationship there, but he knows that David has a tendency towards the overprotective where the lovely blonde is concerned.Â
Emma has been wary of his advances, though, not that he can blame her; with Henry involved and the lad's father nowhere in sight, she's got all the more reason to protect her heart. He'd tried his usual flirting techniques when they'd first started crossing paths - the charm, the smirk, the swagger, the little innuendos women usually love - but she'd shut that down with a cold tone and an unamused look in her eyes. After that... well, it had seemed most gentlemanly to let sleeping dogs lie. He'd tried his best, she clearly wasn't interested, and that would have to be that.
Still. He yearns, in a way that isn't at all befitting of anyone above the age of fifteen - let alone a grown man of thirty. She's lovely and strong and he can't help but be absolutely taken with everything about her.Â
It's a happy coincidence that the park he likes to take Bonny to for walks just happens to be the same park where Emma takes Henry to the playground. He swears. He didn't even know that was the case until he decided that Bonny could use a little socializing with creatures of her own species, something that she's definitely not getting in their little neighborhood.Â
(Yes, he's turned into the most obnoxious dog dad. He is fully aware.)
As he said before, even once he knew that the park and playground were one of the Swan's regular haunts, he wasn't using Bonny as some sort of bait. He'd never dare - both because he'd never disrespect his Very Good Girl like that and because he knows Emma would see right through him immediately. The thing is, Henry's at just that perfect age where he's absolutely fascinated by puppies of all sizes - especially Bonny. As hesitant as Emma obviously is about her son's obvious enthusiasm, it's equally obvious that the little dog adores the toddler right back. Now, three months after Killian first started taking Bonny to the park, the two are thick as thieves; Henry's laugh rings out across the park's grassy green spaces as the two romp and chase each other, Bonny's entire back half wiggling in her excitement. It's also a chance for Killian to get to know Emma a little better. He wouldn't say that they're friends at the end of it, but there's a detente for certain. Maybe on an optimistic day, he'd even say that they were friendly. It's not something they've talked about, per se, but he definitely feels like some of the ice has thawed.Â
"Thanks for this," she tells him quietly one day as they watch Henry frolic about the open space and Bonny chase along after him, making a fool of herself practically tripping over her elongated back half in her loving eagerness to play with the small human.
"What for?" Killian asks. It doesn't quite track; he's not doing particularly much, beyond sitting on a bench in varying amounts of silence with his lovely neighbor. What a hardship.Â
"For letting Henry play with your dog," she replies, nodding in the direction of the spectacle. "Henry really wants a dog right now, and... well, we just can't afford it, honestly. There are months where it feels like enough of a victory to have kept Henry well-fed. Doesn't mean he's good about understanding that," she laughs. It sounds forced, like she's trying unnecessarily to lighten the mood; Killian doesn't much like it. "So... thank you, I guess, for being so understanding about letting him get his fix. I appreciate it."
"It's no problem, lass," Killian responds with a small smile. "And before you try to protest, it seriously isn't. You are - or rather, Henry is doing me a favor, wearing her out a bit. It means I'll just have a sweet, sleepy cuddle bug when I get home, which will be a nice change than her usual running around the house and trying to figure out if she wants in or out. Sweet thing just can't figure it out," he chuckles.
"Henry's the same way - the sleepiness, not the inside or outside thing," she laughs. It seems real this time, which Killian appreciates. She deserves to have more reasons to smile. "He gets home and practically just collapses - no arguing about naptime or anything, which is a pretty novel concept, let me tell you. Maybe that's what I should be thanking you for - letting your dog wear my kid out. It takes some doing, seriously."
"Ah, well, I'm always happy to help," Killian replies awkwardly with an even more awkward wink. He's not especially good about accepting this type of compliment - or any really. Still, it seems less gentlemanly at this point not to. "Anything for milady."
(In retrospect, he should have asked her to dinner at that point - as a date, as friends, as just two adults and a three-year-old eating lasagna, whatever. He just wants an excuse to see her outside of this park. That was his chance, while they were still in the middle of their rapport, and he blatantly missed it. Stupid, oblivious bastard. Time with only tell if he gets another opportunity.)
There are still things to look forward to, even as the weather turns colder and the leaves turn a multitude of colors. Bonny and Henry seem to be the only ones who aren't bothered by the shift in the weather; temperatures change fairly dramatically, up here in coastal Maine. The weather isn't what makes the appeal of this season, however. This year, that designation belongs to Halloween.
"Henry is so excited," Emma explains as they watch Henry clamber up the playground's structure; for once, Killian's crazy dog is curled at his and Emma's feet instead of chasing after her favorite toddler. Maybe she's actually learned how poorly adapted she is to the playground equipment. "He's going to be a pirate, if he hasn't shouted it in your face yet. What are you guys going to do?"
"Oh, I've got a plan in mind," Killian replies vaguely. It's not true in the least; Killian had rather forgot about the holiday until just now. But there's no way he can disappoint his favorite little swashbuckler either, leaving Killian stuck. At least for the moment.Â
Which is how they've ended up here: one grown adult man, a bowl of candy, and his absurdly-shaped dog, now with twelve legs as the eight octopus limbs of her costume comically jangle every time she moves. She's a kraken. He found the knit, tentacled abomination of a sweater on Etsy. Somehow, the get-up makes her look even less threatening, which Killian didn't think was possible. Granted, her little matching hat featuring eyes poking out of her forehead doesn't help the picture. Killian isn't much for costumes himself, but damn if he won't dress his ridiculous little dog.
âNow weâre going to be very good and not run out the door, no matter how long itâs open, right?â he asks Bonny, more seriously than anyone would likely believe. So he talks to his dog; so what? Bonny, for her part, does a very good job of sitting calmly enough at his feet, though her tail wags ferociously.
Heâll take that as an agreement.
âAlright, then, letâs go! Letâs go see all the little kiddies!â he coos, patting at his leg until the little pup springs back to her feet. Not that it takes much prodding; despite her size, Bonny has all the energy of a coiled spring. Eagerly, she follows him to his small entryway, where Killian has set up a camp chair just inside the screen door. Killian knows from past years that the crowds of trick-or-treaters come in waves - fairly steady throughout the night, but with pauses in between where he hopes to maybe catch up on the mystery novel heâd checked out from the library.Â
He doesnât have to wait very long; by 6:30, the trickle of princesses and ninjas and devils begins, all here to pillage his candy (an excellent mix of Reeseâs and 3 Musketeers and Milky Ways, with a bag of Twizzlers thrown in for good measure; never let him be accused of being the lame house in his neighborhood). Bonny, of course, is a hit; he can tell that she wants to leap all over their little visitors, begging for scritches and maybe a sample from their candy bags, but she stays put when Killian reminds her to stay inside. Truly, the best girl.Â
By the end of the evening, however, heâs anxious; itâs almost eight, the proper trick-or-treaters have trickled off as teenagers in half-assed costumes who just want free candy take their place, and he still hasnât seen Emma. Not that she and Henry are obligated to come by his house or anything - of course theyâre not. Maybe they decided to cut the night short, or maybe (God forbid) Henry came down with something and they couldnât come out at all. Or maybe they just decided to skip his house. Whatever. Itâs fine, absolutely fine. Thatâs their prerogative. Heâd just hope, after all Henryâs talk of his wonderful pirate costume, heâd maybe get to see it in person.Â
(That is the reason he put Bonny in a kraken sweater, of all things. It wasnât exactly a coincidence - rather, a planned coordination.)
Of course, the moment he starts accepting that the Swans just arenât coming, the dynamic duo themselves begin making their way up his walk. Henryâs costume is everything heâd promised it would be, complete with a bandana and a drawn-on mustache and fake buckles on his light-up sneakers and a hook on his hand. Emma herself isnât quite as decked out, but even sheâs sporting a pair of cat ears and some eyeliner whiskers.
âSorry weâre so late,â she calls as they approach his porch. âWe went over to Davidâs neighborhood for trick-or-treating. Theyâve got the good candy, supposedly.â
âAh, naturally,â Killian smiles back. âI hope you didnât cut your fun short, you didnât have to drop by,â he tries to protest, but Emma waves him off.
âHenry was wearing out anyways. Plus youâre, like, two houses down from ours. Itâs not exactly a hardship to make such a long trek.â
"Well Iâm happy you did," Killian says, before opening the door wide and stepping aside. "Would you like to come in for a few minutes? The trick-or-treaters have mostly trickled off. I could make us a few cups of hot chocolate."
"That'd be nice. Thanks, Killian," she smiles back, helping Henry up the last few steps.
"Arrrrrr," the little boy growls ferociously. He's certainly committed to the pirate act; he even tries to shake his hook at Killian, but the effect is kind of ruined when the plastic appendage flies off to land at Killian's feet.
"I don't know about pirates, though," Killian teases with a wink at Emma. "Can I really trust such a fearsome pirate captain in my house?"
"That's a good point," Emma replies thoughtfully, playing along. "They are kind of known for pillaging. Will a pirate really be able to behave himself inside?"
"Yeah!" Henry's little voice pipes up from thigh level.
Killian keeps it going. "I've got a nice set of bookends in there; you don't think the captain would try and steal them, do you?"
"You know, I don't know. It might be better if only I came in."
"Now, I'll never say no to time alone with you, Swan," he replies saucily. It's pretty obvious that Emma almost certainly didn't think about her words first, and definitely didn't mean them that way; the sudden pops of pink on her cheeks are proof enough of that. "Come in, then. You know, I'll bet that pirates don't like hot chocolate anyways..."
"I do!" Henry says indignantly. Well, at least as indignantly as a three year old can manage. Which is a lot, all things considered. "It's me, Killy!"
"Me who?"
"Henry!"
Killian makes a show of crouching down and squinting, as if to see beneath the makeup. "Well look at that, it is Henry! You've got such a good costume, I didn't even recognize you with all that on. Do Henrys like hot chocolate, then?"
"Yeah!"
"Alright, you can come in too, then," Killian laughs, ruffling his hand along the boy's hair as he stands up.
As the Swans walk into his entryway and he closes the screen door again, Bonny wanders back in from the kitchen, undoubtedly drawn by the noise. Personally, Killian thinks she makes a very adorable sight with all those tentacles bobbing and swaying and dragging as she walks.
Henry, however, seems to disagree, as he catches one sight of Killian's wee beastie and hides back behind Emma, clutching at her leg. It's definitely not the reaction that Killian expected, especially when Henry usually gets along so well with Bonny.
"It's alright, it's just Bonny," Emma tries to tell him, dropping her voice into that soothing tone Killian's come to associate with motherhood and love and a home he's long since lost.Â
"It's just a costume," Killian explains, though he does also crouch down to catch Bonny by her collar and keep her from barreling forward like he can already tell she wants to. Quickly, he undoes the velcro on the hat and tugs it off; it probably does look a little alarming to young eyes. "See?"
"She's just playing pretend, kiddo. Just like you are."
Henry still looks a little wary, but Bonny is about ready to wiggle out of Killian's grasp in her excitement to see her favorite little boy, so he quickly scoops her up to bring her to Henry in a more controlled manner.Â
Once Bonny's familiar pink tongue flicks out to kiss at Henry's hands and face, he relaxes, thank goodness. "You're silly, Bonny!" he giggles.Â
"Well she wanted to dress to match you, lad," Killian smiles, setting the pup down so boy and beast can wrestle and play.
"She really does make a cute sea monster," Emma chuckles as they watch.
âAbout as well behaved as one too, some days,â Killian grumbles without any heat. Itâs hard to really mean it when Bonny is so obviously good with Henry. âLetâs go to the kitchen, Iâll make you that hot chocolate.â
The kitchen is just a few steps from the living room where Henry and Bonny now play and with a clear line of sight into the other room, so he knows they wonât have to worry about the little rascals escaping their supervision. Not that thereâs much to get into; the liquor and the matches are in the kitchen, and heâs not aware of anything heâd need to worry about the devious duo breaking. The living room is only filled with shelves and shelves of books. About the worst either one could do is disrupt a stack of coffee table books, and some of those would probably benefit from having pages torn out; the âMailboxes of the Northeastâ book that Belle gifted him is a real head scratcher.
âSorry about all that,â Killian tells Emma sheepishly, scratching behind his ear in mild embarrassment. âI thought it would be a fun idea to kind of tie Bonnyâs costume into Henryâs, since I knew how excited he was, but that obviously backfired. I didnât mean to scare him, Emma, truly.â
Killian pours all his sincerity into the words, but Emma just waves him off casually. âKillian, itâs fine. Heâs three, thereâs going to be things that scare him sometimes, and sometimes theyâll be pretty weird. Thatâs kids. You couldnât have predicted that, and itâs not your fault. And anyways,â she nods towards her son in the other room with a fond smile, âit doesnât look like it did any permanent damage, if the way theyâre carrying on in your living room is any indication.â
âThatâs true,â Killian has to admit. The way Henry and Bonny are alternately chasing one another around doesnât exactly suggest a traumatized child. âWell, I just wanted to⊠make sure, I guess, that you knew I didnât mean to scare him.â
âDonât worry, I didnât think that.â They lapse into silence as Killian busies himself with all the necessities of making hot chocolate - collecting milk from the fridge, grabbing a trio of mugs, searching at the back of the cupboard for the tin of good Ghirardelli powder. Itâs a special occasion to have the Swans in his kitchen, after all, and they only deserve the best. Heâs just finishing measuring out the proper amount of milk into the saucepan - go big or go home, right, and using the microwave is decidedly not going big - when Emma speaks again.
âI actually meant to thank you for being so good with Henry. I know all that back there wasnât exactly what you expected when you invited us inside, but you did good. Helping to calm him down, I mean. Though even before that, with the playing and teasing about his costume⊠youâre really good with him.â
âOh, Swan, you donât need to thank me for that.â Even as Killian protests, he can feel a flush of pleased embarrassment creeping up his neck. âThank you, but itâs not necessary. Henryâs a wonderful lad, a real credit to you.â
Emma blows past the compliment, though he does detect the slightest flush on her cheeks. âMaybe you donât think itâs much, but it means a lot to me. Henry⊠thereâs not really a lot of male role models in his life. Obviously, his dadâs not in the picture, so itâs pretty much just David. A lot of guys⊠most guys donât really want to step up like that.â
âItâs my pleasure, Emma,â Killian replies, smiling gently. This almost feels like the beginning of a moment in a way that he hadnât expected when theyâd started this conversation. A part of him wants to seize on that feeling - to step into her space further, to brush that stray lock of hair back behind her ear, to let their hands just barely graze. Itâs terrifying to take that step, though, when he knows that could break apart whatever understanding theyâve reached in their weeks at the park.
Killian thinks that Emma must be of the same mind, as he can see her swallow nervously before she continues again. âI actually wanted to ask you ââ
He never finds out what Emma wanted to ask him, however, as right at that moment, Henry and Bonny burst into the kitchen, chasing each other around his and Emmaâs legs and forcing them closer into each otherâs space. Itâs like a moment out of some cliche movie, and Killian can barely breathe for the anticipation of it all, his hands somehow braced against Emmaâs upper arms as she stares back at him with eyes blown wide. Itâs too close, and not close enough, and he really out to step back out of her space now that the little rascals have run back into the living room âÂ
But then Emma presses up on her toes to drop a gentle kiss on his lips, and all the frantic thoughts running through his head disappear. Itâs just a quick little thing - barely a brush of her lips against his - but something about the tentative gesture feels like trust, feels like a different commitment. It feels like hope.Â
âThat wasâŠâ Killian tries to say, not certain of any of his words in truth, no real idea of how that sentence ends. Amazing? Unexpected? Life-changing?
âI was wondering if youâd want to get dinner sometime,â Emma finishes on a rush. Her cheeks are tinted the most charming shade of pink, but she doesnât seem nervous about the asking - more settled, like she finally knows what she wants and how to get it. Luckily for her, he wants the same.
âIâd love that, Swan.â Like thereâs any other answer.
âWell then⊠good.â
âGood.â As they stand in the kitchen, smiling like fools, Killian canât help the absolutely silly thought that crosses his mind:
Bonnyâs earned herself an awful lot of treats.
(After her clever efforts to push him and Emma together - literally, in this case? She more than deserves it.)
#cspupstravaganza#captain swan#cs ff#cs fanfic#captain cobra#my writing#a twelve-legged matchmaker#look it's just cute guys#including ridiculous pet sweaters
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i walk in 20 hours late sipping a starbucks hot cocoa
i donât like coffee
promethea!!!Â
awwwwww yis
tl;dr: uhh wow i talked a lot today, sorry. Mostly about whatever the fuck that thing Rhys is handing us is, how it ties into the dig site we see like maybe itâs a piece to activate it, maybe the dig site isnât a Vault but instead a teleporter or something and needs multiple pieces to activate. so i guess kinda like a Vault but not that kind of Vault. Also if said dig site is actually on Promethea because thatâs, like, DEFINITELYÂ Elpis behind it. and like, okay, maybe we used the giant space gun to destroy the asteroid fields and make room for elpis and teleport elpis there, or maybe we teleported the dig site to pandora because it needs to be opened since Moon = Key and maybe Prometheaâs moon was destroyed by the giant space gun (TM) and turned into asteroid belt, or maybe the dig site was always ON pandora and itâs not actually a Vault (because the Map would have pointed it out), but still. lots of possibilities here. oh and i go over the Battleborn easter egg and talk about Tannis is Not What She Seems (and pray she wonât end up being evil bc I love her) and I wanna believe the Eridians sent that message, not the cult âcause fuck those guys they probably canât see the future they probably just adopted the name. also I ramble about how gorgeous this planet is for like... 30 minutes. but damn it really is pretty.
man this was a fun thing to wake up to and then have to wait like 8 hours to actually fully take a look at lmao
âHome to the Atlas corporation headquarters, Promethea is a metropolitan world covered in futuristic towers of chrome and glass. A recent siege by Maliwan has turned the urban environment into a warzone; their mechanized infantry patrol the streets, rodent/insect hybrids known as Ratches infest the sewers and back-alleys, and the Children of the Vault are seizing the opportunity to recruit displaced and disgruntled citizens. Atlas CEO Rhys Strongfork is getting desperate.â
â... Children of the Vault are seizing the opportunity to recruit displaced and disgruntled citizensâ.
yeah thatâs the most important part of this description for me. I really really like the idea of that, and it could tie into the whole Mayhem is Coming tagline for the game as, like many people have speculated, the Mayhem we hear about is the spreading of the cult/the psychos across the universe. A very interesting tie-in to the marketing campaign, as itâs clear weâre now the target of this cult propaganda, like the citizens of Promethea are (were? this is all past-tense since marcus is telling this story, isnât it?)... like the citizens of Promethea were.
And we know that Atlas is trying to protect the citizens in the tunnels, so itâd be really interesting to see the two get into a direct conflict over a group of citizens. Like Lorelei tells us it's a hostage situation or whatever and we run in and itâs more of a brainwashing situation. Worse if the citizens decided to switch over without any brainwashing. oof.
im also curious about the number of hexagons we see on Promethea. The shapes look identical to the ones on Pandoraâs page, so Iâm curious if this is an accurate representation of how many areas will be on each planet.
just sayinâ.
We do know that Pandora has more than those 3 listed areas (from Supmattoâs new video! canât believe i missed the stream. ah well.)
âCovenant Passâ. I wanna believe this is near the area where we go find Sanctuary-III, at the very least that one tunnel-y area?
you know the one
this one, itâs right next to Sanc-III afterall.
Also thinking it may not be the name of a huge area, but instead the name of one of the smaller areas within that area? like the ones where when you discover it you get experience points? yeah.
the name makes me think this is someway related to the CoV cause of the word âcovenantâ, an agreement. We also know this area is directly near this one bandit camp which Iâve theorized before is a sun smasher camp
(you can see the back of sanctuary-III near both areas)Â
so itâs possible there was an agreement made and both could pass freely through that one tunnel, or the twins were able to build that wall close to this camp. idk, just spitballing ideas.
So then it is possible thereâs only 3ish areas on Pandora, but I really hope not unless they are BIG areas. There are most likely more than 3.
oh but weâre here to discuss Promethea
sorry i forgot.
For Promethea we got the Titan Skyway, the Atlas Campus, and the Meridian Seaport.
Titan Skyway reads to me like that giant road we keep seeing in the trailersÂ
like this one, which is giving me huge Bloodshot Stronghold (Damtop) vibes. Which is one of my favorite levels to play as melee Zer0 with execute and many must fall so... please let this be what i think it is. i may end up running that map just for funsies at the end of the game. mm if it didnât take running the actual bloodshot stronghold every time i wanted to play the damtop level, iâd be running it all the time. sigh.
Atlas Campus immediately made me think of the Meridian Metroplex, but thatâs definitely not it. In the instagram trailer we see Rhys on the âAtlas HQ rooftopâ with Zer0, so Iâm gonna imagine Rhys is somewhere in the Atlas Campus.
Now if this is like an actual college campus, which i donât think gearbox would do due to the implications, thatâd be wild. I heard they had a mall designed for somewhere in the meridian metroplex, but weâre probably not actually allowed inside. which makes me sad, but also it probably holds no significance on the story. but then again... neither did caustic caverns. hmmmmmmmmm
oh also rhys is holding
whatever the fuck this is
uhhhhhhh... huhhhhh...
tbh i legitimately thought this was their attempt at macgyvering a vault key at first lmao
i know itâs a mission object because it has those glitteries, but... it reminds me a bit of Gortysâs core but i really donât think thatâs it. maybe another Atlas project to try and open a Vault? It just doesnât look Eridian to me.
then again
this appears to be at the eridian dig site so... maybe it actually is Eridian. Definitely new to me.
some way to get inside the Vault area maybe? I canât imagine thatâs the actual Vault Key, because the one we see in the We Are Mayhem trailer doesnât match.
you know iâve been thinking more about vault colors
this one appears pink which... alright. maybe something to do with seraphs/seraph crystals.
The bl1 Vault was blue, the bl2 Vault was purple, the Vault of the Sentinel was... purple? blue? pink? all of the above? ... bisexual? tbqh there was a LOT going on there lol. wasnât the Vault of the traveler yellow? either way
the big question here is: does each Vault have its own color scheme?
I wonder what that means since the Vault Mey has turned red now... itâs probably leading us to the big boy. the Vault to end all Vaults.Â
now wouldnât that be fun
right back to Promethea sorry
final listed area we get is called the Meridian Seaport. Which, if you know me, has got me all like đđđđđđ
water area? why yes PLEASE
i was actually talking to someone on reddit about said âseaportâ and it got me wondering if maybe this area is where weâll find that one car from the Mask of Mayhem trailer.Â
i canât imagine what else those wing-like things on the side would be for. but i am definitely not a car person, like the closest i get is being a fan of Transformers, so maybe someone can enlighten me.
I am wondering if this area is the one we see in the instagram trailer with Moze
here
also i know we see water near where we find Zer0 in the demo, but thatâs not really a dock area, more just a viewpoint. this has me thinking itâs an actual dock because the buildings are all off in the distance. It reminds me a lot of NYC actually lol
and interestingly enough i write about an assassination mission at a port on Promethea in one of my fanfics, but tbh i wasnât actually expecting anything like it to be in-game. That was kind of an assumption I made since the area with Zer0 had water and I canât believe Iâm going to have to go back and edit it to be canon-compliant, cause I legitimately didnât...
anyway.
Should i go over the instagram stuff now? I feel like i should go over the instagram stuff now.
see here is my problem with this
no moon
youâll understand why once i compile my evidence
no moon
no moon!!
no moon
i even watched both time lapses during the amd stream and there was no hint of the moon (i understand promethea is in a state of perpetual twilight, but i thought maybe it would show up somewhere. it doesnât. in fact it only shows the sun and this asteroid belt).
where is my moon, randy?
well let me tell you what iâm thinking here so youâre not even more confused
letâs go through that instagram video showcasing Promethea again
you should recognize this!
this is from that one video i reblogged like 4 times because i kept debating whether or not it was on promethea or pandora. now we can assume itâs on promethea but let me ask u something
if promethea doesnât have a moon...
what the everloving fuck is that?
in fact, let me ask something
what does elpis look like in bl3?
look familiar?
hell yeah it does
now...
is this actually promethea?
I canât imagine gearbox would be using footage that ISNâT from the planet theyâre showcasing in a video about said planet. because thatâs naughty. Plus, Rhys is shown giving us something that looks very similar to the tech in that area, and I canât imagine weâd go through all that trouble just to get that tech then immediately go back to Pandora with whatever it is. whatever happened to the Promethean Vault Key we see in the We Are Mayhem trailer?
so thereâs 2 options here if weâre under the assumption that dig site is/was on Promethea.
This dig site was moved from Promethea to Pandora
OR
Elpis was moved from Pandora to Promethea
Now i went over ALL of this in an old post. (seriously, give this a read if you haven't already, i go into this in a lot more detail than i will here). but we kinda got some new information.
My first instinct is that this dig site is on (or moved to) Pandora. just, 100% Pandora. the moon, the spiky rocks in the background, what look like Rakk near the back, thereâs no asteroid belt in the sky. etc. etc.
do the blue sparkles have anything to do with it? maybe!
Also again, im not 100% certain this is actually a Vault. It just... doesnât feel right to me. If this was actually on Pandora the entire time, then weâd have known about it through the Vault Map. We would have gone to open the 3rd Vault on Pandora before bl3 even began. If this really has been on Pandora the whole time, I do believe this isnât actually a Vault. I go over this in that previous post Iâve made and Iâm still standing by it. I think this is just an Eridian ruin and the Vault shape is just a statue or whatever. I could be 100% wrong, but thatâs my first instinct if weâre being lead to believe this is on Pandora.Â
Now Iâm curious why this dig site was never mentioned in bl2 if it WAS on Pandora this whole time. And, again, if it actually does end up being a Vault, thereâd be a huge plot hole with the whole Vault Map thing if it was on Pandora all along.
So was it moved here? Yeah... probably. For what reason? I... have no idea. How? similar answer. Lily couldntâve done it, she doesnât have her powers anymore. Maybe activating it with whatever Rhys gives us makes it teleport to Pandora. For... reasons.
If it is a Vault, maybe it requires Elpis to open it. for some reason. We know Moon equals Key, so it could play into that. It definitely looks like itâs positioned directly in line with elpis.
but why would a Vault built on Promethea need a moon from a totally different planet to open it?
Because Prometheaâs moon was destroyed.
That asteroid belt? I donât think thatâs there just for funsies (okay maybe the artists had funsies but the actual writing? yeah). And that big gun looking thing we see in both concept art and in the trailer? i think that thing fucked up Prometheaâs moon to the point it shattered. So they couldnât open that Vault.
alright, we all cool on this version of the theory?
letâs flip it on its head.
letâs consider:
Elpis was moved from Pandora to Promethea
NOT possible i hear you say
but hear me out.
whatâs our reasons for saying this is Pandora?
âthe moon, the spiky rocks in the background, what look like Rakk near the back, thereâs no asteroid belt in the sky. etc. etc.â
Elpis? teleported! bah!
Spiky rocks? Well! We hear typhon mention a quarry, donât we? one with brittle rock. This very well could be the quazmarian quarry he talked about where he found that very first Vault (and Vault Key). After all, if he fell into a hole and found it, it makes sense that there would be a shitload of dig teams trying to clear it out for easy access.
Rakk? We see those on Athenas, too, during the Happy Together trailer. Plus, theyâre super chubby on the bottoms compared to what we see of the Rakk in the Claptrap Presents Pandora video. Maybe theyâre not even Rakk.
Finally. Ah. The asteroid belt.
Well, if you believe that that giant gun couldâve obliterated Prometheaâs moon, then is it so hard to turn around and believe that itâs actually obliterated the asteroids surrounding Promethea?
in fact, if we really ARE moving Elpis to Promethea, wouldnât it make sense that we canât have asteroids hitting Elpis for fear of worsening the Crackening and breaking our own moon?
In FACT, do we even SEE any asteroids above Promethea in that trailer shot of the bigass gun?
I THINK NOT.
Thereâs more to this theory, though.
from claptrap presents pandora
from the we are mayhem trailer
yeah, they COULD be celebrating the destruction of Elpis (because i would not be surprised if those are both near the same area)
lets think of something new, though. Elpis being blown up was totally 2015, with Zarpedon. Thatâs SO last season, Calypsos.
Plus, why would the calypsos even want the moon destroyed? is that not the home of a Vault that would allow them to see the future? how fucking powerful would that be, being able to see the future??? Jack knew what he had to do to win the Pandora games (even if he uhhh didnât get to see that last bit because of Lilith), so why wouldnât the Calypsos want to see their own futures?
There is the argument that theyâve already gone to Elpis and didnât like what the Vault showed them, but I kinda assumed that theyâd have gotten the funky eye things like Zarpedon did if they really did see what the Vault showed them. Given that Jackâs was interrupted by Lilith, we donât really know if thatâs truly the case.
Iâm 100% down to blow up the moon cause Good Riddance, but also it needs to make sense WHY the calypsos want it blown up other than like shits and giggles? which... fine, but the story..? Elpis has to be important somehow. They have to want it blown up for some reason. A show of power? awesome, maybe they got that giant space gun. Moon = Key, so maybe they think if we canât get this Vault, nobody can? sure why not. Destroying Pandora? Sure, but why blow up elpis when u could just also blow up pandora?Â
either way, if the game gives us an actual reason as to why the twins are blowing up the moon, weâre all fine and dandy. if theyâre going it just because then yeah, im gonna get kinda testy.Â
anyway my point IS
The effect around elpis here looks strikingly familiar to the effect that appears around Lilith (and the cultists) when theyâre teleported.
so it would be much cooler if, instead of blowing up Elpis, they were actually celebrating its movement.Â
And it would be very interesting then, if this tied into that Easter Egg we got.
You know the one:
Because yeah im still iffy on the implication that this is from the Calypso twins. Why wouldnât they want the Vaults opened? isnât that the grand plan?
maybe this could be from the Eridians or the Guardians on Elpis. If Elpis was teleported from Pandora to Elpis, maybe the translation from Eridian -> English is slightly off, or simplified for the message. (on vs orbiting for example)
Visit Promethea -> Where we are right now, or where weâre going to go. We need you there.
Children of the Vault -> Yes, it could be the CoV cult thatâs being referenced, but the way this is broadcasted, through morse code, spoken like an actual cryptic message and not, you know, with that Calypso flair... me thinks the cult simply adopted the name âChildren of the Vaultâ. I think this may either be referencing Sirens, or the Vault Hunters/Crimson Raiders. Maybe the twins picked up this broadcast and thatâs why they immediately head to Promethea after they steal Lilithâs powers.
We are not on Pandora anymore -> shit dudes we got yeeted to Promethea, help us. Or... weâve moved elsewhere. Weâre not nearby, we escaped, we fled, come find us on Promethea.Â
Tannis is not what she seems -> this one... I donât believe the Calypsos actually know anything about Tannis. If they do, then she was possibly the one to rescue/experiment on them, turning them into artificial Sirens or whatever, but then... isnât Tannis exactly what she seems? Sheâs crazy, she totally would experiment on the twins. That is EXACTLY what she seems like.Â
The people who would know about Tannis not being what she seems... the people who can see the future? The Guardians of the Sentinelâs Vault (maybe just the Guardians/Eridians in general). The Watcher can speak (speak? she uses telepathy, doesnât she? thatâs why Brick asks Lilith what she says) eloquently, I imagine there has to be more than one Watcher-like Guardian. Or this is the Watcher herself sending the message.Â
Either way, if, later on in the game, Tannis starts showing signs of not being what she seems, then... wouldnât it make sense that the only characters who knew this were the ones who could see the future? And given the new info, it makes sense that the Guardians/Eridians/yougetthegist would know her by name, because she could be the one who turned herself into an artificial Siren. Or figured out how to create artificial Sirens. Whichever (both?). Which is kinda big news in the Eridian world, Iâm sure. Plus, the wording using âWhatâ instead of âWhoâ is kinda a big pointer. Iâm almost leaning towards the idea that Tannis tried to give herself Angelâs phaseshifting abilities. I canât see Tannis with actual offensive abilities... It wouldnât really fit her character. But I can 100% see her with mad computer hacking skills, to the point she could ruin anything with a flick of her wrist. Yeah, I can see that.Â
And I really hope Tannis doesnât end up being a villain. She could do so much good with her intelligence and newfound powers and tbh itâs really nice seeing a character with autism not treated like Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory (the butt of every joke). She feels real to me (as someone with autism)- sheâs got her obsession (Eridians/Sirens/the Vaults), her crazy intelligence, the social phobia/unawareness. I really like her as a character (going from betraying us in bl1 to realizing her mistake and immediately trying to help and assisting the Crimson Raiders) and Iâd really hate for her to become the villain just for... idk a shock twist? The shock twist should be that sheâs a Siren or whatever, not that sheâs going to betray us. I like Tannis :( And all the message says is Tannis is Not What She Seems, not that we shouldnât trust her or that sheâs going to betray us.
Do Not Open the Vaults -> well this is the whole thing, isnât it? this is why I think this message has some sort of Eridian origin, instead of the Calypsos cult. The Calypsos WANT the Vaults open. They want that âuniverse-destroyingâ power. They want to absorb the powers of the Vault monsters. Shit, even we Vault Hunters want to open the Vaults for some of that sweet, sweet loot. But who doesnât want the Vaults opened? The Eridians.
oh yeah we were talking about Promethea. how the fuck did i get here?
oh the moon
yeah it could have just been a shot in the Instagram trailer they used to show off the âEridian alien technologyâ. thatâs not fun to talk about tho lmfao. plus the thingie Rhys holds matches up so well with the cool technology we get
anyway
the instagram trailer. weâre not even like halfway done with this post btw. still gotta do those beautiful screenshots
oh
trailer
sorry itâs like 1am im starting to lose focus im shifting into sleepy mode
i just love the aesthetic of this city.
also. that one building with the 0 on it? you canât convince me Rhys didnât give Zer0 their own skyscraper.
oh, you want an entire building to store all your loot and trophy kills? OF COURSE ZER0 ANYTHING FOR YOU
yes....... Eridian log.
im really excited to see it glowing. especially since itâs glowing red, like the Vault Map/key/you know. I hope that has some significance.Â
i did boost the brightness and noticed it was part of a wall, not just one slab found elsewhere. makes me think this is part of a Temple. maybe part of the dig site below? we know that one is connected to some sort of building. and if it glows red, thatâd be a really neat tie in to why Atlas always has that glowing red aesthetic going on in their bases.
still not done talking about this shot. yeah the stuff on the right looks similar to the thing Rhys hands us. NOT why i brought it back up tho. The guardian statues in the back seem very âlow polyâ. VERY different to the guardian statues we have on Pandora. theyâre also holding staffs which is new.Â
compare
these ones also seem much buffer than the guardians we see. with shorter necks, as well.
Maybe these are statues of ACTUAL Eridians? not just Guardians or any other construct (further proof for my theory Pandora was a Guardian production planet lol) but like what Eridians actually look like.
shorter necks, thicker limbs (because why would the constructs NEED muscles?), actual bodies that arenât thin as twigs. I think we found it boys
this is the ideal Eridian body
no cause, seriously, if they ARE guardians, why are they so BUFF?? i donât GET IT
also weird this atlas gun isnât wrist mounted. Atlas sniper confirmarinoed? or just an Old Atlas gun. sure. that too.
Moze on a turret near what i assume is the Meridian Seaport. She has what i think is an Atlas pistol equipped. Thereâs a dead guy leaning up against some cinder blocks, all cozy-like.Â
better shot of the area. We talked about this earlier, so moving on!
Okay... so is THIS the New Atlas sniper? it looks like nigel thornberryâs nose
smashing.
we saw this before, too. im actually really excited to look out over the Promethea skyline from the top of a skyscraper. also, idk, rhysâs hand looks like a yaoi hand to me. like his fingers are above the F in strongfork, right? look how far away his thumb is. YEESH.
itâs actually ONLY rhys lol
An Atlas soldier at work! I like that their gear has the crimson lance logo on it. And the new Atlas symbol. I feel like if we have to fight these guys, the crit spot is gonna be that backpack.
maliwan robo!!!
a big boy. one of the flying ones too iirc from the We Are Mayhem trailer.Â
Atlassss in the back. itâs weird that the second A in Atlas is the logo, not the first one. the first one is a triangle. thatâs weird is it supposed to be signalling something else? a triangle with a circle around it. i donât even know what that might be a logo for. hm.
oh also police bots i guess, but we see these dudes a lot.
im more interested in this thingie in the back. wonder what happened to it/what it is
ratches. blegh.
i hate these things jfc. theyâre so gross.
i like that maliwan is just claiming things by throwing their flag up on it. thatâs not how this works! thatâs not how any of this works!
anyway.
how are those screenshots lookin
pretty good.
im pretty sure iâve mentioned this before, but i love that they named this part of the city Meridian and then kept the Eridian logo in the spelling. itâs so fuckin dorky to me.
also i know weâre supposed to hate these robos, but at least theyâre getting some characterization as enemies. the loaderbots in bl2 do this but not to a degree that they get their own interactions (LB being the exception of course). I like this.
also i love that parts of the city are color coded. like red and blue parts are different areas. Itâs such a neat way to help people not get lost (cough, me) and it fits great into the design of the city with the neon lights and bright colors. I noticed this in the gameplay demo as well, tho i donât remember if it was followed. Also Iâm pretty sure that symbol up there
is what the blue area is called. could be wrong. but i think i saw this during the demo as well.
i think this is going to be my favorite area to visit on Promethea, hands down. I love this little living area. It feels so unlike anywhere weâve visited in previous games, like it feels like somewhere Gaige could be from. Actually, iirc Roland was from Promethea, wasnât he? Be wild if we visited his house here. Anyway, Iâm also excited about the trees. Fucking! Trees!
and cars!!! holy shit yeah on Pandora we only ever saw like light runners or bandit technicals and the occasional bus. all the cars were broken down and stripped for parts! Itâs really cool to see actual full cars here.
wow i am excited over the most mundane shit lol
wait till you guys hear about the PARKING LOT
OHHHH YEAH
CROSSWALKS TOO
lol im actually- i just love this area. i love it so much. this is lovely. i love the giant glowing reactor in the background too, i 100% hope we get to interact with that (posssssibly blow it up. maybe just a little.) I can see this area being the area we have to run through to reach the entrance of that thing. I mean, itâs just RIGHT THERE.
Also would not be surprised if this KV fellow is waiting for us there. âWho wants to BANG a billionaire indeedâ. Heâs totally gonna be a boss fight. BANG i imagine means more shooty shooty than innuendo... innuendo...
it sounded better in my head.
the symbol for the red area possibly on that tower in the back?
Iâm like, 60% sure this isnât the area we explore with Lorelei, so maybe this is the Titan Skyway? also maybe the bridge Moze and Fl4k drop off of in the Happy Together trailer.
hate. i would quote AM here but im tired so just imagine the entire âHateâ quote here because i HATE these things.
thereâs also a big skelly in the back, i wonder just how big these fuckin things can grow. hopefully uhhh like a cow died here or smth. cuz fuck man.
this area is also super green and watery so i wonder if this is a sewer or smth. thatâd be wild lol
Another shot of the city. Itâs so fucking beautiful. I really love how they went all out for this. Opportunity was great, but it wasnât nice to look at. Promethea is fucking STUNNING. I love this place way too much. Never even been here before.
also i love the fog coming up from the bottom. Maybe this shot is taken from the water? god if we get to go on the water and then it starts fogging up i might actually start crying lol.
this building is my favorite by far i think. I love the way the middle turns in. I have no idea how thatâd work like... from an inside standpoint, cause the ground would just be slanted under you but im sure they made it work somehow.
anyway. im gonna go cry myself to sleep over how beautiful this game is. sorry i talked like... WAY too much during this one lol.
also i just thought of this while writing the tl;dr but maybe that item rhys gives us is after all the Promethea stuff is over, even the Vault(s), maybe we need it to activate something in that vault statue area on Pandora and thatâs our way to like some important Vault or the Eridian homeworld or smth and we gotta collect all the pieces to activate it. like itâs a teleporter. Maybe Rhys had a piece because thatâs what was in the Vault of the Traveller. I mean it would make sense because if you didnât want someone to have something, you fuckin hide it in a box thatâs teleporting across the galaxy at random intervals. That might be our way to the Eridian Homeworld. Now wouldnât that be neato...
#borderlands#bl3#borderlands 3#promethea#wow sorry i just WENT OFF tonight#it's 2am tho so nighty#i did my best#time for sleep
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Aloha Oe X Edith Nox Crossover Episode 8: Ice + Fire = Emotions
So, this episode has music, I recommend you play the music.
@cometworks < author of her novel.
Tag: @coloursintheblur , @thelysstener
And here we go!
FADE IN:
INT. NEYDOLYAâS NEW HIDDEN LAIR.
The aftermath of the RAVEN MONSTER had passed. VODNIK, slimy and sneaky frogman and right hand to the disgraced Fate NEYDOLYA. He returns to his mistressâs side and gives full reports.
NEYDOLYA
Vodnik⊠your reports.
VODNIK
Mistress Neydolya, Iâve come to report that the ritual by the Necromancers brought him back.
NEYDOLYA
A successful mission, presumed. Do you have what is required of the spell?
VODNIK
Yes, mistress. (He presents her with a book with the ritual circle drawn and list of ingredients next to it.)
She grabs the book and looks over it.
NEYDOLYA
Good. The Empath Witch?
VODNIK
The news of the Black Beastâs return had sent her into a state of rage. Her mind fractured separating her core emotions.
FLASHBACK: VODNIK had followed JUSTIN & VIOLET holding a knocked out EDITH.
NEYDOLYA
Interesting. Empath Magic has that capability. Search the archives, there may be an item that has a similar ability. What shall we do with the Princess?
VODNIK
A demon of her own design, her ice, her fire, and her fear.
CUT TO:
INT. JUSTINâS PRIVATE QUARTERS. MID-MORNING
It was mid-morning, the sun was shining, and JUSTIN was in his private quarters. He conversed with ENOCH.
JUSTIN
Enoch, open Diary Recording. Nox Universe. 582. New entry.
ENOCH
Diary Entry Number 8. Recording begins.
JUSTIN
Itâs been a couple of weeks now in this universe. I made amazing new friends and a world full of magic and possibly beyond. Recently fought a raven mutant monster. Noemi and Argento have soul summoned him by accident⊠glad he found some new development in himself. I wonder what will happen this day. (He falls silent.) Stop recording.
VIOLET comes into his private quarters slowly.
VIOLET
Justin? I need to talk.
JUSTIN
Come on in.
They both sit down together.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Whatâs up?
VIOLET
Thereâs this person⊠that I⊠I⊠IâŠ
JUSTIN
Like a lot?
VIOLET already feeling awkward enough just shuts her mouth up. Shakes her head up and down answering his question. JUSTIN smirks with excitement. VIOLET felt a little awkward due to the fact she doesnât open up to many people and with someone thatâs an alien. She felt like the only person she could talk too was him.
JUSTIN
Who? Boy? Or Girl? (He looked at her as if he was inspecting clues written on her face ) Girl? Isnât it?
VIOLET nods again.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Someone new? Someone youâre close to?
VIOLET
Someone Iâm close to.
JUSTIN
Oh, lovely. Uh, military officer?
VIOLET
Sheâs not in the military.
JUSTIN
Oh, okay, uh. So personal then?
VIOLET was silent but was looking at a plant in the corner of the room. JUSTIN realizing who she likes very much his jaw drops.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Noooooo⊠No. No. Really?!
Drawn back from his words, VIOLET was scared.
VIOLET
WHAT?! What?!
JUSTIN
Is it⊠is it Edith?
There was a slight smile on his face, VIOLET became rather shy and had a pinkish red tone flushing her cheeks. The feeling of embarrassment and feelings of lov- lov- lo- liking someone a lot. Her face squished from liking someone a lot and embarrassment she tries to hide her face with both hands. A smile was finally formed on JUSTINâS face as he goes to sit next to her and comfort her.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Hey, no, no. Itâs okay.
He was rather caring and supportive.
Dude, you like Edith?
VIOLET
YeahâŠ
JUSTIN
V! Thatâs great! Itâs amazing!
VIOLET
ThanksâŠ
JUSTIN
Look I know youâre nervous and like I told Noemi. I was so afraid and nervous too. I fell in love with Hoku since I attended high school on Earth. I⊠uh⊠it was her eyes. Those shining brown eyes that reminded me of the stars.
VIOLET
That sounds⊠sweet of you for Hoku. But I canât express it to her, Iâm afraidâŠ
JUSTIN
Again I know how you feel. Even my daughter felt exactly the same way when she met her boyfriend. Â
VIOLET
Wait you have a daughter?
JUSTIN
Adopted. But sheâs still my little girl. Despite being a similar age to her.
VIOLET
Sheâs a hundred too?
JUSTIN
No, just a regular Panguan girl. Sheâs only 17. But anyways⊠let me help you out.
CUT TO
INT. LAPIS FORREST. MID-MORNING
Both VIOLET & EDITH with a picnic basket in hand are walking toward the Lapis Forrest. VIOLET felt the feelings of nervousness. Something she was unable to feel before due to the fact she is trained to face things beyond terrifying than this. As well as being both Princess and Commander, to an entire kingdom. But this⊠this was nothing compared to fighting other witches and wizards and facing an entire kingdom.
VIOLET has a quick flashback:
FLASHBACK:
JUSTIN
Ok! What does Edith like?
VIOLET
Uh⊠gardening, libraries, tea, people, puzzles, questionsâŠ
JUSTIN
I meant⊠on a date but thatâs good. Where does she like to spend her time?
VIOLET
The Lapis Forrest.
JUSTIN
Maybe a picnic?
VIOLET
She loves picnics.
JUSTIN
Then great! Start off with a picnic!
CUT TO:
INT. EDITHâS FAVORITE SPOT. MID-MORNING
VIOLET distracted trying to remember what to do, EDITH had already set up the picnic set.
EDITH
Violet? Are you okay?
VIOLET was caught zoning out. EDITH motions her to sit on the blanket.
VIOLET
What? Oh, sorry a bit distracted. (She sits)
EDITH
You okay?
VIOLET
Iâm fine. How was your day?
EDITH
I donât know really, the day has just begun but Iâm pretty much happy that you asked me to go on a picnic. Want to go the Bazaar later?
VIOLET
Iâd love that.
VIOLET & EDITH are enjoying their picnic, filled with their favorite foods and drinks.
EDITH
Can you really believe it?
VIOLET
Believe what?
EDITH
Justin⊠him being an alien and all that. Space. Thereâs really more out there in the universe.
VIOLET recalls to a flashback of EDITH on Gaia. VIOLET recalls a memory of EDITH and LEANA both holding hands of LEANA. Being two big sisters to her, they had watched the stars while a night on the town.
VIOLET
Yeah⊠I couldnât believe it either.
EDITH
You were quite harsh with him too.
VIOLET
I was still learning how to trust him. Plus a boy spouting about aliens and space and different universes isnât exactly normal for us.
EDITH
True⊠but he turned out to be a good person.
VIOLET
He is a good man⊠he brought new experiences for us.
EDITH
Time travel! Universe travel! He took you to see ClementineâŠ
VIOLET
I know⊠despite what happened⊠I know he was trying to be kindâŠ
EDITH gets closer to her to comfort her. VIOLET'S inner thoughts made her blush.
EDITH
SorryâŠ
VIOLET
NO! Donât be. I just miss her, ya know? Wishing I had more time and all but I know sheâs in a better place.
EDITH
Thatâs good⊠and sheâs probably watching over you right now.
VIOLET looks at her scars and smiles.
VIOLET
I know.
The feeling of happiness surrounded their soon to be a fun-filled day.
CUT TO:
INT. LAPIS BAZAAR. AFTERNOON
The Lapis Forrest was this unique beauty within itself. It was home to a species of tree that produces blue buds when flowering. Just like the color of lapis lazuli. The leaves are a very deep green. There were huge rocks of Lapis Lazuli everywhere as well.
In the Bazaar, there was filled with magical creatures here and there and humans as well. A peaceful coexistence, everyone acknowledges VIOLET as their princess with greetings and bowing.
EDITH
Famous as always.
VIOLET
Well⊠I am a princess. (She smiles with pride)
EDITH laughs and smiles, she sees something catching her eye and sees gemstones which make her overall happy. She eyes a simple and basic quartz crystal on the vendorâs table.
EDITH
QUARTZ! (A smile was glued on her face)
She holds it and sees it change color, to Mellow.
VENDOR
Are you an Empath, if I may ask?
EDITH
I am!
VENDOR
Then that is the perfect gemstone for you. That quartz is enchanted as a sort of aura looker. You can see their emotions.
The gemstone was imperfect but EDITH loved it anyway. She looks through the clearness and saw the VENDORâS aura showing mellow.
EDITH
Cool!
VENDOR
That will be a 15 Units.
EDITH checks her wallet but was short on cash.
EDITH
Aw man⊠I donât have enough units.
VIOLET sees her sad face and steps in, holding 15 units. Their coin currency were metal thin rectangles.
There were huge rocks of Lapis Lazuli everywhere as well.
VIOLET
Fifteen Units, here ya go.
The VENDOR shocked by her presence, he bows.
VENDOR
Princess Violet!
VIOLET
Hello, my lovely subject.
VENDOR
You have graced me with your presence, your highness. Please take the quartz in honor of you my princess.
She places the units on the table.
VIOLET
No. You are a hardworking man. You deserve to be paid for what you do. Please.
He bows and EDITH takes the gemstone and she holds it in both hands. Scrutinizing it and holding to her eye and looking through it. She looks at VIOLET and sees her current aura, it was all pink and with EDITHâS magic it amplified it. Seeing the emotion of love. The excitable EDITH curious as always smiles after the discovery.
EDITH
V? (She steps closer to her) You like someone? (She whispered)
Surprised and scared by the question, VIOLET had believed EDITH knew her feelings for her.
VIOLET
How did you know?
She was scared and embarrassed that her true feelings were revealed.
EDITH
Is it a prince?!
Showing some relief, she answers.
VIOLET
No. Itâs not a prince.
EDITH
Knowing you no prince can win your heart. A Military man?
VIOLET
Uh⊠no.
EDITH
Oh my⊠a normal boy?
VIOLET nods and shows embarrassment.
EDITH (contâd)
A NORMAL BOY! A princess and a simple boy. That reminds me of a fairy tale momma read to me once. TELL ME! TELL ME!
VIOLET
We met⊠uh⊠we met during a trip to a Blacksmith. Father was making a request for a blade to be made once I reached eighteen. He was the son of the blacksmith⊠and I thought he was handsome.
EDITH
Thatâs so adorable! YOU SHOULD MEET HIM AGAIN!
VIOLET
I donât think I can.
EDITH
Donât deny your feelings V⊠Youâll never know how he truly feels.
VIOLET
Edith⊠you know me⊠Iâm not raised by my emotions⊠everything I am I was just⊠I donât know! (She became emotional) Iâm a Princess and a military commander⊠I trained myself to be serious andâŠ
EDITH
You wear a heart of steel.
VIOLET
YeahâŠ
EDITH
But knowing you⊠determined as always. Youâll find a way to show that handsome⊠handsome boy love you.
VIOLET
YeahâŠ
CUT TO:
INT. JUSTINâS PRIVATE QUARTERS
JUSTIN doing research as he has a plate of food and soda next to a fancy glass cup. VIOLET rushes in and was extremely worried. She hugs JUSTIN to which he responds to treat her like a big baby.
JUSTIN
Hey! How was the picnic? Was it bad?
VIOLET
Not it was goodâŠ
She sounded like a child as she said her sentences like a child.
JUSTIN
Then why are you upset?
VIOLET
Because⊠she⊠almost found out I liked her⊠(She pouts)
JUSTIN
Did she?
VIOLET
No⊠she saw my aura with this gemstone that amplified her magic. It was pink⊠I was in love.
JUSTIN smiles sits her down on a chair.
JUSTIN
Thatâs good! Did you tell her?
VIOLET
No⊠I made up someoneâŠ
JUSTIN rubs his face with his right hand.
JUSTIN
Are there any further plans?
VIOLET
I donât knowâŠ
JUSTIN
I think you should tell her.
VIOLET jumps out of her seat grabbing JUSTIN by his shirt.
VIOLET
No! I canât Justin!
JUSTIN
But why?
VIOLET
Because I canât do it! I donât think I can do it! (She starts to cry)
Tears were falling down her face.
I am just a princess⊠and a soldier⊠and Iâm complicated! Edith wants normal! And simple! And everything else normal! IâM NOT NORMAL! I AM EVERYTHING COMPLICATED!
She cries in JUSTINâS shoulder to hide her face. He caressed her back to make her feel better.
How can someone so beautiful have so much power over my heart?
JUSTIN
Itâs called love⊠itâs the most complex feeling in the world and yet it makes you feel so happy. And I canât believe you said that about her.
VIOLET
Said what?
JUSTIN
You called her beautiful.
Despite the tears, that little sly comment made her smile.
VIOLET
She really is⊠how can someone like that ever love someone so complicated as me?
JUSTIN
Love suffers long and is kind.
VIOLET
Whereâs that from?
JUSTIN
A thing called the Bible. Itâs an Earth thing.
VIOLET laughs.
VIOLET
What am I gonna do?
JUSTIN
You get her attention. Howâs a dinner in the Lapis Forrest? Any good spots?
VIOLET
Um⊠thereâs this spot that would be nice for a dinner date. Itâs by a stream and itâs a huge space.
JUSTIN
Sounds perfect. Enoch, do you still have the Digital Construction Box?
ENOCH
Of course, Captain.
ENOCH makes the item appear on the table through digital transport. JUSTIN grabs the box and throws it in the air catching it.
JUSTIN
You ready?
VIOLET
I guessâŠ
JUSTIN
No. (He kneels before her) Violet Choi. Look at me.
She does so and looks at him in the eyes. Her face showing a somewhat of wallowing sadness and shame. JUSTINâS face held this slight smile but didnât give off the sense of happiness. He held much of his breathe in as it was too raspy. His heart had opened to Violet as he spoke about the one girl that he honestly and truly loved.
JUSTIN
Again⊠I know what this feels like. You are beyond⊠terrified. Despite being something so impossible. That somebody so normal as Edith⊠ can make all the difference in our lives so much better. I was scared, afraid that I would mess up⊠but I told her because I couldnât stand the longing and the aching pain of my heart. Now, she loves me⊠somebody I believed I wasnât worthy enough for⊠somebody who always had their heart open just for me.
His heart was worn as if it were a crown and laid out for Violet to see. What he had spoken was all too true for her as well, as is with everyone else who experiences love, I guess in some cases. Â
JUSTIN (contâd)
So please donât say, âI guessâ say âIâm ready.â because deep down you love her⊠and somewhere along the way, you wonât know if she feels the same way.
VIOLEt had raindrop type of tears, she still held a serious face but had that sadness attached to it.
VIOLET
I want to tell her so bad⊠but I canât. My heart feels locked⊠and it stops me from telling how I truly feel.
JUSTIN
I think I can help with that.
JUSTIN breathes in and puts both hands together, he breathes out and his eyes glow orange. Using his aura manipulation to unlock his Empath powers. He places his right index and middle finger on VIOLETâS forehead. Sending a wave of energy to her heart, as the orange energy zooms straight to her heart as it glows ever so brightly through her skin. Showing a little animation of a keyhole on her heart and it was magically unlocked.
VIOLET felt different, her heart was⊠lighter⊠no more steel, no more hiding behind the armor she built so long ago. She stood up from her chair and smiled.
VIOLET
I feel different⊠I feel⊠uhâŠ
JUSTIN
Happier? (He smiles awkwardly)
VIOLET
I think so⊠(She turns to Justin) Huh⊠you handsome Jus.
JUSTIN
Thank you⊠(He laughs a little) Violet, I think it worked.
VIOLET
How?!
JUSTIN
You complimented me⊠you rarely do that.
VIOLET realizing this had her eyes prop up like a map being opened up and down.
VIOLET
Youâre right⊠I⊠I am happy. I feel happy! And⊠I love Edith Nox! (She closes her mouth)
Realizing she said that aloud, she reached a new level of happiness. She jumps for joy and hugs JUSTIN.
VIOLET (contâd)
Iâm happy! (She says with glee)
JUSTIN
Thatâs amazing! Now⊠let me ask you this. What would Edith like on a dinner date?
VIOLET thinks to herself.
VIOLET
She loves music.
JUSTIN
Do you guys have any love songs? Like before the apocalypse?
VIOLET
There are several⊠but I donât think theyâd be good.
JUSTIN smirks again, now holding his phone in his hand.
JUSTIN
(He smiles) Luckily you have a friend, who's an alien, from another universe. Who also happens to live on Earth.
VIOLET
This is gonna be perfect. (She smiles once more)
CUT TO:
INT. ASTRIFEROUS GROVE. NIGHT
The stage has been set, no literally. JUSTIN had used the 3D Digital Construction Box and digitally built a wooden deck that filled the surroundings of the grove. Complete with a table meant for VIOLET & EDITH and a piano. JUSTIN had set up fairy lights along the surrounding trees to help with the lighting. To accent the glowing and enormous lapis lazuli rocks.
There were other lights to help brighten up the stage. The sound of the stream nearby made things seem so peaceful. Everyone was there, JUSTIN, NOEMI, PERIWINKLE, ARGENTO. They all had a hand in helping to make this date perfect. The Wooden Deck also came with a perfect kitchen, to which JUSTIN had the ultimate experience of knowing how to cook, having spent time with his adopted human father.
JUSTIN had prepared a series of Hawaiian foods, due to growing up in Hawaii for a few years of his life. From appetizers to dessert, it was all prepared. NOEMI & ARGENTO have dressed accordingly as waiter and waitress.
JUSTIN
You guys ready?
NOEMI
This is gonna be great! I still canât believe Violet likes Edith!
ARGENTO
Ok! First Thanks for inviting me! Second, (She turns toward Justin) Youâre an alien! I canât believe that! Three, this is so friggin romantic! (She squeals joyfulness with each sentence)
PERIWINKLE
THIS IS REALLY PRETTY! I CANâT WAIT!
JUSTIN
Weâre all ready! Noemi, Argento! You are the waiters and you shall deliver the food! Peri, I want you to take them to their seats after that set the mood. (He whispers in her ear)
They all break, as the food had already been prepared and they take their places. VIOLET & EDITH had shown up with EDITH wearing a blindfold.
EDITH
Where are we going?!
VIOLET
Itâs a practice dinner⊠when I meet with the boy againâŠ
Having seen JUSTIN in the distance and PERIWINKLE on a stepping stool near her hand. She was the Restaurant Host. VIOLET takes the blindfold off of EDITH and both smile. EDITH takes her excitement to a new level, as her containment was held by VIOLETâS hands who she placed on EDITHâS shoulders.
VIOLET
Hi Peri! Our reservations?
PERIWINKLE
Right, this way you two!
She steps off her stool and holds both VIOLET & EDITHâS hands. Standing in the middle of both of them, leading them to the only table in the center of the huge deck. They both sit on the chairs, and PERIWINKLE had presented them with the menu of whatâs to come.
PERIWINKLE
Welcome to⊠Astriferous Grove! Chef Justin has prepared an alternate universe main course from his universe. Your waiters will be my big brother, Noemi and the love of his life Argento.
JUSTIN had some lyricless music, play as it was a simple tune, a peaceful beat. (Play Monday Loop by Tomppabeats until you see stop) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2z8CSRP_ok) PERIWINKLE summons her wind constructed wings and rises to the sky. She sets the mood, she manipulates the wind with her magic. Creating a light breeze having the trees sway to the beat of the music. NOEMI & ARGENTO show up as waiters, handing them the menu of what to expect to eat.
NOEMI
For your appetizers, expect a⊠(He grabs the menu from Edith) Spicy Ahi⊠Poke (Po-kay) and a Spam Musubi.
ARGENTO For the main course, Loco Moco. A bed of rice topped with a cooked burger patty and a sunny side up egg. Drenched with gravy with hints of chili flakes due to the liking of spiciness.
NOEMI
And for dessert. Malasadas, Coco Puffs, Chocolate Hau- Haupia⊠Pie. With Shave Ice.
ARGENTO
Letâs start off with drinks. Water?
EDITH
Iâd love some water! (She speaks with a boyish voice.)
VIOLET
Water as well, please.
NOEMI with his wings flies over to the kitchen counter and holds a plated dish to carry the cups of water. ARGENTO placing them down on their specific side of the table. They both disappear to the kitchen leaving EDITH & VIOLET to talk alone. Having the uncaged excitement she bursts with such happiness.
EDITH
OH MY GOD, THIS IS SO FRICKEN ROMANTIC AS EDEN!
VIOLET smiles.
EDITH (contâd)
DUDE YOUâRE SMILING! (She wiggles in her seat)
VIOLET
I know I am. (She laughs)
EDITH
Everything about this place is perfect! The glowing lapis lazuli! The little lights! The swaying breeze and the music! AND FOOD FROM A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE! AH!
VIOLET
Iâm glad you love it! (She smiled)
EDITH
Love it? Iâm infatuated with this! This is so romantic! Wish someone would do this for me.
VIOLET
Well⊠since you're my dinner date right now⊠Iâm doing this for you.
EDITH
Why thank you, your highness!
NOEMI & ARGENTO return with the appetizers, a bowl of Spicy Ahi Poke (Po-kay), and a spam musubi. Both grab a fork and dig into the first dish. The forks stabbed into the dish, the prongs had easily pierced the raw tuna marinated with sriracha mayonnaise. Cutting part of the rice with it and scooping it up and taking the first bite. Their eyes brighten as their taste buds had taken the first bite.
The taste of the spicy ahi was unique. The cold and raw tuna had sent that chill, it was as if there was dance was going on. The combined spice from the sriracha mayo, combating with the chill and made it all too delectable. The crunch of the sliced up scallions was heard and the small bed of rice of its warm heat calms both elemental flavors of spice and chill. Leaving behind the everlasting heat, but the chill that was a simple breeze.
VIOLET
(With her mouth full and eyes closed) Thatâs so good!
EDITH had probably seen the face of God⊠well, in this case, she already has seen them. She was the same as VIOLET eyes closed and internally happy with her mouth full. They finished the bowl, holding their faces.
EDITH
OH MY GOD, THATâS THE TASTE OF HAWAII?! I LOVE IT! (She had tears of joy.)
The move on to the Spam Musubi, this rectangle sushi like creation. This version is shown two spams, one of each on both top and bottom. Wrapped in the middle was a seaweed wrap, the spam had a lightish brown sauce underneath.
NOEMI
Justin suggests eating this with your hands. Better experience.
They do so, and their first bite was⊠well, it was delicious. The saltiness of the spam was laid out as a bed on their tongues. The sweet teriyaki sauce made the salt taste all to better. The moistness of the seaweed complimented the heat of the rice. They were in love all over again, knowing the taste of Hawaiian food made this dinner date all too delectable.
NOEMI & ARGENTO had taken away their appetizer plates and return to the kitchen. Where JUSTIN had been all too articulate with serving them their main course.
JUSTIN
Did they enjoy?!
NOEMI
They did!
JUSTIN
Awesome! I have some plates for you guys too. Peri is actually eating the ones made for her right now. (He points to his right)
PERIWINKLE had her eyes closed as she had gone to Food Heaven.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Just finish serving them and you guys get to enjoy your plates.
NOEMI & ARGENTO both look at each other and grab the main course. Loco Moco. A dish with a bed of steaming rice topped with a cooked burger patty and a sunny side up egg. With gravy poured over all the dish. VIOLET & EDITH grab knives and forks.
They dig in immediately, the heat from the patty and rice sent the sensation of a fire steaming in their mouths. The yolk of the egg was cut open as the slice let the yolk runs down every inch of the dish. The yolk had made the gravy more delectable and the chili flakes kicked in the spiciness added to the dish. They felt the same feelings as before.
Dessert had arrived immediately, as NOEMI & ARGENTO were so eager to try JUSTINâS cooking. They take away their dinner plates and immediately return to the kitchen. They see their plates dinners ready and rises up to Food Heaven.
Desert for VIOLET & EDITH was sugar galore. The Malasadas was like biting off a piece off a cloud of fluffiness. The fluffiness of the bread had released pockets of warmness on their taste buds. The sugar complimented the taste as the sweetness added an entire level.
They move onto the Coco Puffs, it was chilled to the point where the bread had this stale-ish taste. Although the cream filling inside chilled inside made the taste of it ultra better. VIOLET had taken a like to the custard coco puff, as it oozed custard filling. As well again, the chill of the desert. While EDITH enjoyed the chocolate cocoa puff as the chocolate filling was a different taste.
The penultimate one was this gorgeous looking pie with whipped cream covering a haupia layer and chocolate filling inside. IT too was chilling and the coldness of the desert was all too tasteful. VIOLET loving every single cold desert, she hadnât noticed that her ice magic was crawling up on her. EDITH was a major sweet tooth and couldnât stop eating and wanted more.
EDITH
THIS IS SO GOOD! (She cries out)
VIOLET
Can we just live in Justinâs universe?! I WANT HAWAII FOOD FOREVER!
Their last and final dessert was Shave Ice. A Hawaiian snow cone, but is way massive than what normally people expect. The colors of the rainbow surrounded it. Eating ice with different flavors was rather addicting, as the colors laid down on their tongues and the over sprinkled sugar had caused them to go into a state of insanity for the moment. Â
The Dinner Date had ended, both VIOLET & EDITH were full. Sitting on their chairs like they eat half of a feast made for kings and queens from near and far.
EDITH
Iâm so full⊠(She rubs her tummy as she moans in agony)
VIOLET
Me too⊠but it was all worth it.
EDITH
Yeah⊠it was. (She smiles a little but places her head on the table)
JUSTIN appears near their table. (Monday Loop STOPS PLAYING)
JUSTIN
I suggest you guys move around to help with the digestion.
He nudges VIOLET, motioning her to a dance floor near the stage. JUSTIN suddenly appears at the piano, ready to play a song. He speaks into a mic.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Alrighty⊠this lovely night special night for a Princess and her soon to be the love of her life. Uh⊠what his name Violet?
VIOLET
Um⊠uh⊠Edward⊠Edward Lux.
EDITH
Aw, cute!
JUSTIN
Alright. Letâs dance.
JUSTIN places both hands on the piano keys, ready to play. Feeling the ivory material under his fingertips. He plays the song Your Song by Elton John.
JUSTIN (contâd)
Uh⊠grab a partner.
Being that VIOLET & EDITH were the only ones on the dance floor. They realized JUSTIN meant the two of them to dance.
VIOLET
Oh⊠I think he means you and me.
EDITH
Oh, makes sense. Considering were the only ones on the dance floor and since I am filling in for Edward. May I have this dance? (she does a bow as respect)
VIOLET smiles and returns the bow and they begin to dance. JUSTIN begins to play the song. He sings the song which surprises everyone around, hearing a voice of what some would describe as an angel or an even a god. He didnât prefer either title despite literally being a god himself. He was just a simple alien boy playing and singing music. Â
 VIOLET (V.O)
Justin, you always surprise everyone, donât you? (She smiles)
EDITH
OH MY EDEN! HE CAN SING TOO?!
They danced to the song, suddenly they see waves of colorful light of the sound of the song. They look at on and continue to dance. EDITH with her magic senses the feelings of happiness all around. VIOLET inside was having the time of her life. Dancing with the girl she deeply, deeply loves.
After the dance, JUSTIN speaks again.
JUSTIN
Iâd like to make a mention of my little sister, Hathor. Who is an amazing artist and comes from a planet where art is taken to a whole new level. Violet⊠I think itâs time to say what you need to say.
VIOLET comes to the stage and is handed the microphone by JUSTIN.
VIOLET Ok⊠um⊠Iâm not very good at this. But⊠uh⊠I never admitted something like this before⊠so please just⊠uh⊠bear with me,(She breathes in, then out.) I love you. I know thatâs so broad and out there but⊠I really and truly love you. The first time I met you, I hated you. It was unreasonable and I⊠Iâm so so sorry. I blamed you for the one thing I couldnât control⊠and I felt so terrible about it. But over the course of our story, we became friends. You defeated the one thing I couldnât and gave me a reason to keep going despite all the painful and aching memories. And that⊠after all that⊠my heart just longed for you. You filled the missing piece of me that was ripped away by that monster. And I held this in for so, so long, and I canât wait any longer.
She steps off the stage and walks up to EDITH. Her eyes were teary-eyed, like shiny stars. Gleaming with the colors of the glowing lapis lazuli. Her heart of steel along with ice had been unlocked and melted away. It was gleaming every essence of âTrue Loveâ had resonated. Â
VIOLET (contâd)
Edith Nox⊠I love you.
EDITHâS heart had stopped for that one moment. Her magic revealed to her senses that VIOLETâS aura was glowing pink aka love. Actual and true love for her. JUSTIN plays the piano, playing song Canât Help Falling In Love by Elvis Presley. VIOLET steps a few paces back and begins to sing the song.
EDITH begins to cry tears of joy after feelings of VIOLET even more through the song she sang. NOEMI, ARGENTO & PERIWINKLE dance in a circle with all hands together. The songs ends and VIOLET sees EDITH standing in the same spot, unresponsive.
VIOLET (contâd)
Look⊠I know this was a huge surprise⊠but I donât know⊠I love you and if you donât share the same feelings I understand.
She begins to ramble but EDITH taking her by surprise gives her a kiss. NOEMI, ARGENTO, & PERIWINKLE cheer for them. JUSTIN sits on his piano chair and smiles at the fact this mission was a total success. With their heads pressed against each other and eyes closed.
EDITH
I love you too, Violet Choi.
She laughs which makes VIOLET give her a kiss in return.
Hidden within the darkness was the shadow of the slime and sneaky frog man, VODNIK. With his magic floating orb.
VODNIK
Mistress, we found them.
NEYDOLYA
Start the spell. (She says to herself) It has begun. (She has this malicious smile on her face)
FADE TO BLACK
END OF EPISODE 8
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TIME TO GUSH ABOUT TLJ cause I was looking through screenshots and hereâs a bunch of things I might not have mentioned before and a few that I have
1) Paige Tico!!!! PAIGE TICO! her entire time in the spotlight is such a perfectly crafted, perfectly tense scene
2) UM THE OPENING SPACE BATTLE IS SICK the bombers have such striking silhouettes and this is used for some amazing shots
3) PAIGEâS DEATH BEING PRESENTED AS TRAGEDY (and not being softened heavily with the promise of being part of something meaningful the way R1âČs deaths are)Â
4) Captain Candy Crushâs death is given gravity too and I stan this, heâs not made sympathetic and still thereâs nothing triumphant about people being blown up. war is not good
5) Finnâs pod is very flattering and angelic even though his water suit is silly. he basically has a halo and no filmmaker would accidentally give a character a halo so jot that down
6) Snokeâs throne room being utilitarian AND extravagant at the same time is impressive. also I still love the way that Snokeâs real form was made to be this exaggeratedly WASPy old man with the skin texture and wrinkles and pale tufty eyebrow hair, and you know what else? the fact that the camera favors showing the undamaged side of his face. I fucking stan the fact that Johnson took another disfigured villain and played up his old caucasian grandpa looks and made his disfigurement blend into his age. Snoke is a caricature of horrid old white men, possibly the first successful caricature of whiteness in speculative fiction. he looks like Henry Kissinger
7) Kylo Renâs bandaid has a pattern on it. we ask ourselves. why. did he get to pick out the pattern. are there multiple patterns. are they all edgy and black. Iâm now completely invested in whoever decided that they would have patterned bandaids but not make them TOO fun
8) the movie is so pretty im just. the fuckign. aesthetic. all of it. the palette seems to have been taken from a thunderstorm and itâs perfect. the use of gray is a reason I happen to think people didnât like the film. they were like what the fuck is all this gray in star wars. star wars shouldnât be gray. but itâs so unique, itâs not the gray of lazy color grading, itâs the gray of someone who knew that the feeling of haze and uncertainty needed some gray and rolled it in like a fog. Iâm going to have to post more screenshots
9) I like the fact that the puppet porgs, as opposed to the CGI porgs, are actually kinda ugly cute
10) everything mark hamill does is perfect. every line, every facial expression, every pose. every moment from luke in tlj is unbelievably iconic. alec guinness would be so jealousÂ
11) Luke perking up and genuinely smiling when he sees R2D2 is the purest moment I have to justÂ
my eyes are moist
12) the architecture and set design is so amazing too? I love this shot introducing Rose, the harsh contrast that draws your eye away from her, the way sheâs fading into her corner of brownish-gray, itâs so good for evoking... idk, just how the world seems too bright and too stark and made of shapes, after someone you love dies
13) I really love how much time we spend on Ahch-To, and how none of it has any campy space action. youâd expect to see some training there, but a lot of people were clearly hoping that Luke and Rey would leave the planet. but we linger so much on the setting, a setting which wholly embodies Lukeâs state of mind
14) old luke is a handsome gent. i donât see enough people with the hots for old luke. this is a big mistake
15) this shot foreshadows Kylo Ren becoming the Supreme Leader IMO. we see him surveying the war machine, watching the instruments of death be constructed, set apart from everyone -- a glimpse into Kyloâs desire for absolute power without anything being direct. maybe heâs contemplating his isolated existence, how much he doesnât belong in the Order. or maybe he sees an allure to all this. this is what he wants to possess. itâs probably a mixture of both
16) Rey and Luke!!!!!!! everything about how the film frames them develops their relationship!! even as Luke is testy with her, we get shots like these where theyâre sharing a warm sunset light and having deep heart to hearts.Â
and you know what you know what what what
the fact that Rey starts asking WHO her parents are after meeting Luke is uhh clearly suggesting that sheâs wondering if maybe Luke is her dad. I love in this one shot how heâs slumped and sheâs sitting up straighter, making him the vulnerable one. I love how the sunset light highlights Reyâs buns. I love that she keeps her buns for a while. I love that people have headcanoned she kept the buns so that her parents would recognize her, and she has the buns in the whole time sheâs trying to get Luke to act like the hero she believes in. like sheâs trying to get him to recognize her
Rey adopts Luke as her dad and itâs beautiful get out of my face
17) ye thereâs a lot of dead children but also I hadnât really thought about the fact that R2 watched this as well? and R2 was powered off for so long, until the end of TFA? R2 was traumatized and grieving too, and heâs seen this before, he remembers all the way back to when it was Anakin
18) hors!!!!!!!
19) what the SHIT is this why is this movie a fucking painting why does it keep outdoing itself in paintingness argh the way this film uses the day-night cycle is unbelievable, having Rey and Finnâs stories be connected by having the same time
THE HCKING MOON THOUGHÂ
20) Ok we could talk about how the cold blue moonlight of uncertainty has become the warm orange light of companionship but we canât forget what firelight also represents re: Kylo cough burning temple nice little double meaning, is Rey making a new friend or is she being tempted, is he going to warm her or burn her
but also I havenât thought about how fucking awkward Kylo looks!! is he sitting on that barrel?? like since heâs not there is he just sort of compositing himself into the scene? using a convenient barrel
21) see what I mean about blue being cold. blue = asceticism, red = indulgence, the two extremesÂ
22) Luke sinks into darkness
23) BUT HE DOES ONE THING! the thing that breaks him out of his depression. he takes the fire -- which represents the burned temple, represents Ben Solo, represents the humanity of the Dark Side -- into his own hands. we see the fire symbolizing destruction, then intimacy, then change, in such short succession
fire represents light-dark, something that is both at once. weâll get back to this
24) you could say that balance is about making your own light in the darkness
also this is why Poeâs line about being the spark that will burn the First Order down isnât ~too violent~ cause fire has become a symbol of change, of destruction reclaimed as something restorative, thank you very muchÂ
25) can we talk about the fact that between this being like a coffin and the way Rey is holding the saber, this actually has the heaviest resemblance to the way medieval knights were depicted atop their sarcophagi. I donât even know what it means but maybe it hints that Rey sees herself as a martyr and a crusader in this quest to redeem Kylo and prove her valor
26) the fact that Poe isnât the only one who gets in on the coup. because the Resistance isnât a real military itâs a few thousand antifas gathered from all around the galaxy and their numbers are dwindling fast. people kind of put it all on Poe but Connix and Finn and Rose and this woman and this man and this alien were part of it too, and they could have told Poe to cut it out. I like how the blonde woman seems like sheâs not sure whatâs going on, sheâs evaluating the situationÂ
27) you know what I stan? I continue to stan aspects of how Snoke is portrayed. I stan the fact that he gets all close up in Reyâs face and grabs her cheek and it kind of mirrors the way Kylo gets in her personal space in TFA but even less so than in TFA, Rey is not framed in the way girls often are when theyâre restrained and in distress. when sheâs being tortured, weâre not given any tantalizing views of her body. Snoke floating her around the room has her stiff and awkward, and the close-up of her screaming in pain puts the camera behind her head so we see this from her POV, weâre not voyeuristically staring at her, weâre experiencing this indignity with her
28) Kylo Ren killing Snoke has the exact same light on his face as when he killed Han Solo. this is very very interesting
here I am in my corner of Kylo having twisted affection for Snoke as well
29) I wish I could ship this more cause I donât need all this talk of fairy tale weddings and force pregnancies when here they are slicing up lobster boys with laser swords
30) oh but this is where he makes Rey look sad and thats where!!! you know hes gonna have to pay!!! basically everything about the scene where Kylo tears Reyâs heart out and stomps on it and then asks her to be grateful is extremely well done and it did its intended job of making me Big Mad At KyloÂ
also look the fire is back its Symbolic
31) you know what I canât show in this post? the FUCKING SOUND THAT COMES AFTER THE HYPERSPEED RAM. that sound is the most glorious sound Iâve heard come out of a movie. itâs like a massive metal whaleâs death scream. Star Wars has always run on sound design but literally that sound (along with the scene itâs attached to) outdoes everything that has come before it holy wow
32)Â Finn WHACKING Phasma. he didnât use a lightsaber in this film, but he uses the baton he picked up the same way he used the lightsaber, and it even glows blue for good measure. and we canât forget that this movie shows a boy holding a broom like a lightsaber, and Rey practicing saberplay with her staff, so -- objects that are not lightsabers symbolizing lightsabers is a thingÂ
33) I didnât think about the fact that the Supreme Leaderâs throne room is designed to display a view of the outside, or be cloaked in red. possibly it could display anything it pleases. this is great fun for imagining First Order characters making it display things they want to see, like beautiful vistas, or holofilms. possibly it can recreate whole scenes, like a Star Trek holodeck
34) I donât have to talk about how Leia is framed by the dawn on Crait do I? we already got the picture when it comes to the day-night cycle and how beautiful it is
35) BABY 8 I canât believe this droid gets belly scritches and nuzzles from Poe
36) fucking love when Kylo finally snaps and starts throwing petty tantrums again at the end of the film like he holds back his brattiness for 12 hours and then here comes the screaming and foot stamping and flailing
I have thrown too many temper tantrums in my life to not want to see one on the big screen in its full glory. no one has pushed him to the point where heâs just ugly crying on the floor, spewing snot and tearing at his hair
I got vicarious pleasure out of Poeâs outburst on the bridge too. people being angry and not being in the right. itâs something I need for catharsis
37) miniaturized Death Star technology aka BIGGEST LIGHTSABER. Kylo stop compensating
but AU where a ginormous person uses the cannon as an actual saber
38) IâVE TALKED ABOUT HOW FINNâS MOMENT IS IN MY TOP TWO FEELS MOMENTS (top one is the hyperslice) but basically if you donât think he was affected by seeing the slave kids on Canto Bight, what do you think heâs so angry about here, what do you think has him in a blinding rage?
why do movies have to spell everything out for people in exhaustive detail? the only new thing Finn gets from his experience with Rose, is seeing how the First Order isnât this isolated enclave of evil. the most powerful people in the galaxy have been supporting it all along. he stops trying to run away because he realizes there is nowhere he can run that wonât have injustice. and heâs seen villagers being massacred, heâs seen the Order attack people he cares about, heâs been personally threatened and had one-on-one duels, but on his trip with Rose he sees children being beaten into submission with electric whips
canât believe people think Finn wasnât affected by that when itâs the one thing motivating his character growth
every time he sees civilians getting hurt -- children and families -- he sees himself and the family heâll never know in them, and is so overwhelmed that he does something brash and radical and self-endangering every time, and his arc is about learning to live with that anger. he runs away from feeling and his angst is so beautiful
and Iâm still in the camp of Finn having had a Zuko-like arc when he was a teenager because that boiling frustration at not being able to express his natural empathy is what drove Zuko to angst so hard
FINN IS THE SOLIDARITY KING! HE CARES SO FUCKING MUCHÂ
39) fire. Luke facing his demons involves him walking through a gate of flame, out of the darkness, into the light
I will say that this is also very Buddhist imagery -- the flaming sword symbolizes wisdom, which cuts through the veil of illusion, specifically the illusion of duality
âMañjuĆrÄ« is depicted as a male bodhisattva wielding a flaming sword in his right hand, representing the realization of transcendent wisdom which cuts down ignorance and dualityâ
and of course fire being the bridge between light and dark has come up before in the film. the veil is visibly burning here, Luke having fully reclaimed the image of fire, which was earlier in the film held by Kylo RenÂ
I mean. just. YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
40) something about this shot is extra special. everything thatâs going on on the salt flats is like on this higher dimension, this spiritual planeÂ
41) for a moment it looks like Luke and the First Order are standing against Kylo. gives you a glimpse into Kyloâs state of mind. is the Order his weapon, or his enemy? itâs both, and heâs absolutely terrified of it
also Iâve talked about how Palpatineâs Contingency plan is about getting revenge on his Empire because he hates its power as much as he revels in it, and he dedicates a good deal of time plotting ways to kill it, because he needs to prove that he is more powerful than it
being the Emperor or Supreme Leader carries with it the distinct horror of knowing that you can never be more powerful than the thing that has empowered you
42)Â
43) Luke achieving 100% maximum Buddhist allegory
44) the slope of the floor is the slope of the opening crawl of a Star Wars filmÂ
all right thatâs all folks
#my post#star wars sequel trilogy#the last jedi#kind of a rewatch#rey of jakku#rebel finn#kylo ren#luke skywalker#finnrey#cw reylo#cw anti reylo#villain kylo#things I don't focus on as much#poe's arc (have talked about Holdo a lot)#rose (have talked about her a lot)
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Thoughts on creek as parents?
I think theyâd make good parents! It would be completely nerve-wrecking at first, because Tweekâs terrified heâs going to end up being his parents and Craigâs not entirely sure if heâs really dad material, but I think theyâd figure it out and really shine as dads.
I can see them having three kids. Maybe four, but three seems like a good number to both of them. (Personally I envision twin girls and a boy with about a five or seven year age difference.) Whatever career choices they make, I think theyâd end up being financially stable enough to afford kids, and I think thereâs a part of them both that desperately wants to be a dad. Craig grew up with a pretty solid father figure in Thomas: a good man with his flaws, but at the end of the day still a good man who loved his wife and loved his kids and wanted a better life for them than the one he led. I think thatâs an impression that really sticks with Craig throughout his life. And thereâs a part of Tweek that adores the idea of raising a kid. Something about the idea of a child looking up to him and calling him Dad makes him melt inside.
Iâm not sure exactly what method theyâd go about getting a kid, though. Adoptionâs fairly standard, and I think the idea of giving a kid a decent and stable home would be kind of satisfying to the both of them. And while theyâd love to adopt younger kids, I think theyâd actually go for older children, the ones who have hit the age where itâs pretty unlikely theyâll ever be adopted (because everyone wants a cute chubby baby or a giggling little kid, not a preteen or a teenager).
On the other hand, I could easily see them wanting their own biological kids. Craig would have no problem with contributing sperm, but I think Tweek might have some hang ups here. Itâs possible heâd be concerned about passing on any of the genes for his mental health issues or if there was any permanent damage to his DNA due to the meth. Basically, heâd be terrified that any kid with his genes would be fucked over from birth. So if we go this route with the three I mentioned earlier, the twins would biologically be Craigâs and the boy would biologically be Tweekâs. (The age difference then would be Craig slowly convincing Tweek that he wouldnât be damning an innocent kid with his genes.)
And hey, Mephestoâs still around; maybe they find a way to combine their genes to have kids that are biologically both of theirs. But with this one, I think theyâd still focus more on the adoption option in case it didnât work out. Also, itâs South Park; you probably wouldnât have to suspend belief much to get some sort of mpreg scenario going.
Tweek would probably be the more anxious parent. Heâd be the one who tries to keep the food healthy and organic, but I think heâd relax a little bit as the kids get older. From birth until about 5 or 6 years old, Tweek would stress a lot about their diet. Heâd also probably be the one in charge of discipline, because Craig is absolutely weak for their kids. All their daughters have to do is tear up and Craig breaks. All their son has to do is sniff and Craig breaks. The kids can pretty much do whatever they want if Craigâs in charge. (Within reason, of course, because Craigâs weak, but heâs not a complete push over.)
Craigâs definitely the sort of dad whoâs constantly got a camera on him. He films their babiesâ first steps, he does those cutesy photo projects you can find on Pinterest, and heâs a sentimental piece of shit who keeps every single thing his kids make and every since award they get. Tweekâs the one who organizes it all into scrapbooks, because itâs either that or eighty million shoeboxes eating up their closet space. Craig will deadpan Dad Jokes with a straight face, but Tweekâs more cheeky with them. Tweekâs usually the go-to parent for help with homework. Unless itâs math or science, Craigâs not that great at it and vowed after completing his PhD program that he would never deal with that bullshit again. Academically speaking, Tweekâs always been more of a jack-of-all-trades.
Tweek wants them to eat as healthily as possible, and Craigâs perfectly fine with shoving a Cosmic Brownie in the kidâs hands if they want a snack. Tweek keeps the fridge stocked up with milk and juice, and keeps drink mixes on hand to make the water palatable for Craig and their kids (who seem to inherit his sensitivity to the fluoride levels), and Craig has no problem slamming a 24 pack of soda or two into the shopping cart. Craig ends up with the designation of âFun Dadâ while Tweek gets stuck being the âBoring Dadâ as a result.
Tweek is big on reading to the kids when theyâre young, and does a lot of research on how to help kids do well in school. He even tries to raise them bilingual, since he spent most of high school and college learning Spanish. Heâs actually fairly fluent, so Tweek ends up succeeding at this. Which drives Craig nuts, because despite actually being half Peruvian, he doesnât know a lick of Spanish and never had the head for learning a second language. So itâs like Tweek and the kids have a secret language they can use whenever they want to exclude him from the conversation. It happens a lot in the weeks leading up to Craigâs birthday, Christmas, Fatherâs Day, and their wedding anniversary.
If/when the kids get involved in any sports or clubs or anything like that, Craig and Tweek would be very supportive. Theyâd go to every game/meet/competition possible, and if they canât both make it, they work it so that at least one of them can. Like, Craig and Tweek would be the parents decked out head to toe in the schoolâs colors. Tweek would be the loud one, constantly cheering and hollering and whooping, just very vocal of his support for his kids; Craigâs more quiet, but heâs the one sitting next to Tweek holding a handmade âGo #27âł type sign. If the kids made the honor roll, you can bet like hell both Tweek and Craig are gonna have those âMy son/daughter is an honor student at â
Craigâs office would have at least a dozen framed pictures of his family, and a couple of their finger paints pinned up. His favorite mug would be the ironic not-entirely-a-gag gift one that says â#1 Mom.â (Tweek got the dad one.) He loves it and drinks out of every day. Anyone who gives him shit about it saying Mom instead of Dad gets the one-fingered salute and nothing else. If Tweek chooses a career in which he gets an office, his would be in a similar state: pictures of his kids and his husband, pieces of the kidsâ artwork, and so on.
Theyâd both be proud papas who love their kids so much, and once they get the hang of this parenting thing, they discover theyâre actually pretty good at it.
#nina answers asks#anon#sp creek#sp craig#sp tweek#i can't see these two as anything other than proud and supportive dads who love their kids with everything they've got
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Reyna Writes: Crazy - A Miraculous Christmas Fic
For my partner in crime and Alyadrien shipping, @siderealsandman, I bequeath to you an Alyadrien Christmas fic~
Merry Christmas, babe~ <3
~Reyna
Alya watched the snow dance to the earth, indifferent. As beautiful as the display was, she just wasnât feeling this Christmas. She didnât even know why she agreed to come to this party; what was the point when she only knew one person there, who was too busy playing host to everyone else to hang out with her?
She sighed, her breath fogging up the window.
She missed Marinette. As proud as she was of her best friend for moving to New York to pursue her fashion degree, it didnât change the fact that Alya was unbearably lonely without her here. Especially since their holiday plans had fallen through, with Marinette missing her flight back to Paris due to a massive snowstorm that had hit her adopted city. And with her and Nino giving each other space after their break-up last year, Alya was as far into the holiday blues as she could be. It was official: getting out of her apartment tonight to be around people she didnât know had been the opposite of what she needed.
âScrew this,â she decided, moving away from the window to squeeze her way through the party, which was now in full swing, bodies pressed so close together that she was uncomfortably warm in her sweater. As Alya pushed through the crowd to reach the door, she sent a brief glance Kimâs way, wondering if she should let him know that she was dipping out earlyâŠaw, he wouldnât notice. Sheâd just send him a text later, thanking him for the invite, even if she didnât particularly have much funâŠ
Alya was just reaching the door when it suddenly opened, and she jumped back in surprise.
âOh, sorry,â said the stranger as he stood in the doorway, looking sheepish. Alya spared him a brief glance before she edged around him.
âNo problem,â she mumbled, just ready to leave. âMerry Christmas.â
She got to the front step before her shoulder was suddenly seized. She turned, scowling at the sudden contact. Who the hell did this guy think he was?
âAh,â said the stranger, blinking green eyes as if he was surprised; he released her shoulder to ruffle the back of his blonde head. âSorry. I justâŠyou look familiarâŠâ
Alya adjusted her glasses, squinting at him. âŠHuhâŠnow that he mentioned itâŠ
ââŠAdrien?â She gasped, once her mind actually made the connection, gawking at him now. âAdrien Agreste?â
âAlya Cesaire?â Adrien asked in turn, and when Alya nodded, his face broke into a miracle grin, warming his angular face and helping Alya see past the man to the boy she once knew. âOh wow! I havenât seen you sinceââ
âSince we graduated collĂ©ge, yeah!â Alya finished for him, laughing breathlessly at the pleasant surprise. As she eyed him up and down, she added, âWell, you havenât seen me, but Iâve certainly seen you, M. International Supermodel. Whatâre you doing slumming it with us commoners? Shouldnât you be at a fabulous fashion soirĂ©e somewhere, not eating the decadent hors dâoeuvres?â
Adrien cringed, still somehow looking handsome despite the anguished expression.
âI decided to skip that this year,â he admitted, burying his hands in the pockets of his designer jacket. âI kinda wanna eat this Christmas.â He glanced over his shoulder, and then blinked down at Alya. âAre you leaving?â
âAh, yeah,â Alya admitted with a shrug, tugging her scarf a little tighter around her. âItâs a little too wild in there for me. But you go ahead and enjoy. There are a couple old faces in there Iâm sure would be thrilled to see you.â
Adrien glanced over his shoulder again, and then back down to her. She smiled when she met his eyes. It was nice to see him in person againâŠmaybe sheâd send him a message over Facebook sometime so they could get reacquainted properly the next time he was in townâŠ
Adrien stared at her for a long momentâŠand then, to Alyaâs surprise, he stepped back outside, shutting the door behind him.
âWanna go get coffee?â He asked with a hopeful smile, the tip of his nose already turning rosy from the cold. Alya stared at him in utter disbeliefâŠand then she smiled, feeling a rush of gratitude for the kindness that seemed to stay with Adrien, despite the years that had passed.
âIâd love to.â
âReally? You and Nino arenâtâŠtogether?â
Alya made a face over her mug. She really didnât want to rehash, butâŠ
âWe had a good run,â she pointed out, sipping at her latte as Adrien sat across from her, staring as if he had just been informed that Santa Clause did not exist. âAnd weâre still friends. Weâre just giving each other some space for the holidays. Cuffing season, yâknow.â
Adrienâs brow furrowed. Alya pursed her lips. How did his skin manage to remain perfect when he made faces like that? She was going to have to learn his secret before she went home.
âCuffing season?â He asked, the phrase obviously foreign to him. Alya smirked at his innocence.
âYou know how you see more couples than you usually do around the holidays?â
âI guess?â
âThatâs because itâs cuffing season. No one wants to be alone during the cold months, so they jump at anyone whoâs even remotely interested, and they stay together until the spring, only to break up as soon as it gets warm so they can find someone more suitable. Hence, the end of cuffing season. Although,â Alya said, interrupting her explanation as she eyed Adrien up and down, âI doubt youâve had this problem. Any girl you date is probably looking to stay with you for life. On that note, make sure you always wear a condom. Some girls out here will trap you by getting pregnant, you know.â
Adrien turned an interesting shade of red. It was kind of cute.
âUh, anyway,â he said, changing the subject after he cleared his throat, âhowâs Marinette?â
âSheâs good. Stuck in New York for the holiday, but I doubt she minds too much, since her boyfriend also happens to live in New York,â Alya said, making a face. Lucky bastard, getting to spend Christmas with Marinette.
âOh, sheâs seeing someone?â Adrien asked, and Alya was bleakly amused at his surprise.
âWell you didnât expect her to wait around for you forever, did you?â She teased. Adrien stared at her, and belatedly, it occurred to Alya that maybe this was a can she shouldnât have opened. Whoops.
ââŠYou mean,â he began slowly, as if piecing together a puzzle that was only causing him so much difficulty because he was looking at it upside-down, âthat Marinetteââ
ââHad a huge crush on you in collĂ©ge, yes,â Alya finished for him. A part of her felt bad, divulging this long-kept secret to the object of affection himself, but hey, enough time had passed where she figured it was safe to talk about it. It wasnât as if Marinette was still hung up on the guy anyway, if her letters about her new beau were any indication.
Silence filled the air as Alya sipped at her coffee, watching the snow fall. After a couple minutes, Adrien spoke.
âI didnât know,â he admitted, his voice quiet. Alya turned to him with a dry look.
âI know you didnât know,â she assured him flatly. âEveryone but you knew. You took âobliviousnessâ to a whole new level, and frankly, I was kind of miffed at you for not noticing. I know it wasnât your fault,â she prefaced when Adrien began to look troubled, âbut Marinetteâs my best friend, so Iâm obligated to be upset on her behalf.â
âUmâŠsorry?â Adrien said awkwardly. Alya laughed, waving away the apology.
âDonât sweat it. It was a long time ago; weâre cool.â She set down her mug, eyeing the model across from her once again. âSo? Whoâs occupying your bed nowadays? A girlfriend? A casual hook-up?â
Adrienâs blush deepened. Red was a good color on him, Alya mused.
âAhem. Uh, no,â Adrien replied after a flustered moment of him getting himself together. He raised his mug, mumbling shyly behind it, âthereâs no one in my life like that.â
Alya stared at him.
He wasnât serious, was he?
âSeriously? Youâre not seeing anybody? You?â She shook her head in disbelief. âThatâs not possible, youâre way too hot to be single.â
Her candid comment made Adrien choke on his coffee; she had to lean forward and thump him on the back to help him clear his air passage. Once he could breathe again, Adrien mopped his chin with a napkin, looking more embarrassed than he had all night. Alya relished it; she doubted many people were able to see him so ungraceful. She kind of wished she could take a picture without him noticing.
His next comment cut through her smugness: âI could say the same about you.â
Alya blinked, and then stared at him.
âŠDid Adrien Agreste just say that? To her?
He wasnât looking at her, his face as red as a candy cane, still rubbing at his mouth with the napkin, though it looked as if it was an unconscious gesture at this point. He glanced over at her after a moment, and his blush grew. âŠIntriguingâŠ
ââŠWell,â she said, choosing to take the comment in stride, âthank you. But Iâm not a supermodel, unlike some people I know.â She gave him a pointed look, and he grinned sheepishly. âBesides, itâs Christmas Eve. Your ignorance of cuffing season aside, donât you naturally just hate being alone this time of year?â
Adrien took his time answering this time, contemplating his mug as if he was watching an interesting program occurring within the liquid. After a few moments of silence, his gaze flicked up, meeting hers.
ââŠBut Iâm not alone,â he pointed out, nodding to her when Alya took a moment to understand his meaning. She considered that, finding herself smiling without meaning to.
âI guess not,â she agreed, lifting her mug to clink it against his.
Before Alya knew it, it was four in the morning. She blinked at her phone when she eyed the time, certain that couldnât be correct. After all, there was no way she had spent the whole entire night walking around Paris and talking with Adrien Agreste, right? There was no way she found herself drawn in by him and his smiles and stories, laughing at his stupid puns and bantering back and forth with him all nightâŠthere was no way she found herself walking close with him, accepting the warmth of his arm when she shivered in the cold, making a competition out of catching snowflakes with their tonguesâŠthere was no way that this was real. That this was possible.
Was there?
âAlya?â
She jumped, startled by the hand that brushed past her cheek, somehow warming her skin more effectively than any hot beverage. She glanced over from where she leaned over the fence overlooking the Seine, gazing wryly at the model beside her as he reclined against the fence. What, was he constantly posing out of habit or something?
âWhat?â She asked him, wondering if he had asked her a question and she had missed it, too wrapped up in her own thoughts to pay attention. She watched as Adrienâs brow furrowed, his eyes intense as he studied her. Suddenly, she found it difficult to look him in the eye.
âYou just look like youâre worried about something,â he said after a moment. Alyaâs lips twisted. She never was good about hiding her emotions.
âItâs nothing,â she lied initially, not wanting to make a big deal out of this for more reasons than one, all of them complicated. But when Adrien kept staring, she sighed in defeat. She didnât know why, butâŠit felt wrong to lie to him. Maybe it was his innocence. âItâs justâŠâ
âYes?â He prompted when she paused, leaning closer to her. His proximity was like a physical touch; Alya let out a huff, watching her breath mist over in the cold before she finally made herself turn to face him. After all, she was never one to avoid things; if she couldnât face difficult situations head-on, then she would never get anything done.
ââŠAre we crazy?â She asked after looking at him for a long moment, searching his eyes. There was something thereâŠsomething she had witnessed growing all night, the later they stayed out, the longer they talked, the closer they got. She knew he felt it too, thisâŠthingâŠbetween them, which was why she said âweâ instead of âIâ, because it couldnât be just her. He felt it too, she could see it.
The question was: what were they going to do about it?
The thing twinkled in Adrienâs eyes, all but acknowledged. He blinked slowly, searching her face just as intently as she had searched his. The air seemed to still around them, the early morning holding its breath, waiting for them to teeter one way or the otherâŠ
ââŠI donât think so,â he replied at last, lifting and dropping a shoulder, as if it was the most casual thing in the world to admit that there was a spark between them. âI mean, I get itâit does feel crazyâŠâ He dropped his gaze for a moment, and then glanced up at her through his lashes. Alya felt her heart thump unevenly, and she wanted to scowl. He was doing this on purpose, wasnât he?
ââŠBut itâs a good kind of crazy, isnât it?â He finished quietly, as if he was afraid of disturbing the hush of the morning.
For probably the first time in her life, Alya hesitated. After all, this was seven thousand kinds of complicated: not only had Adrien been the love of Marinetteâs life at one point, but he had also been Ninoâs best friend, and they still kept in regular contact, as far as Alya knew. To do thisâto actually even consider what she was thinkingâfelt like two types of betrayal to people she loved.
But on the other hand, to deny something like thisâto betray her own heartâ
Adrien interrupted her internal debate; his hand touched her face, his thumb sliding across her cheek. Alya felt her eyes close, her head tipping back automatically as she felt his breath on her lipsâ
His lips were warm, soft, and inviting, and as Alya melted into the kiss, she felt herself surrender. Even if this meant she would have to have a couple potentially awkward conversations with her friends later, she knew that in this moment, in this kiss, that there was something between her and Adrien Agreste. Something that had the potential to be amazing, if she would let it.
When they parted for air, Alya opened her eyes, finding that Adrienâs were still closed, his face flushed deeper than the cold was responsible for. As she watched, his eyes slowly opened, and the warmth thereâŠwell, Alya felt that her knees might turn to jelly. But she wasnât about to let him know that.
ââŠâ A slow smile stretched across Adrienâs face. âWow.â
Alya laughed. âWowâ indeed.
Somewhere nearby, a bird chirped. Alya glanced up, surprised to find that the sky was beginning to lighten. Dawn was coming.
âCâmon,â Adrien said, straightening up and sliding an arm around her. âIâll walk you home.â
âWhat a gentleman,â Alya teased him, willingly sinking into his warmth. Well, not a bad way to spend Christmas in her book. Not a bad way at all.
#reyna writes#crazy#a miraculous 2k17 christmas fic#for siderealsandman#hope you like it sweetheart~#alyadrien
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190. Someone told me once that to create true art you must be willing to bleed and let others watch. (with Jackcrutchie please? Also what ships are you okay with writing so we know which ones we should send in, if you dont mind me asking? )
[Iâm comfortable writing pretty much anything! The only people I write together exclusively are Jack and Crutchie (I wonât write Javid or Crutchie/Spot, for example.) But other than that, send me whatever! This piece has a trigger warning. They is a little bit of talk of self harm. No graphic depictions or anything, but itâs there.]
190. Someone told me once that to create true art you must be willing to bleed and let others watch.
Art had always been Jackâsescape. The feeling of paper beneath his hands, watching his feelings come tolife on the page in front of him. Swirling colors together, putting them ontothe canvas. It was a comfort, a way to express the things that had happened tohim when he was young.
Jack hadnât always beencalled Jack. When he was young, he had been called a different name, a wrongname. He had felt wrong too. His mom had made it better. She didnât care whathe wanted to be called. She called him Jack and she loved him so much, givinghim crayons to express himself. Everything changed when she died. Suddenly hewas Jessica again and his mommy was gone. He felt wrong again. The dresses hisfoster families forced him into, the name they called him, the pronouns theyused, it was all wrong and horrible. He lashed out, he was angry at the world. Therewas one family that was worse than the others. They were sugary sweet when hissocial worker was around, but when she left they were horrible. They made himgo to âcounselingâ which was really just their pastor telling Jack that if hedidnât stop pretending he was a boy, he would go to Hell. They forced him towear dresses and skirts every day. The worst thing they did, however, was takeaway his art. He wasnât allowed anything that could write in his room. If hehad homework, he had to do it sitting at the kitchen table. He turned tounhealthy ways of coping. The scars that remained on his arms and legs wereevidence of this. When his social worker found out, she went ballistic. She gotJack out of that house and he was placed in a new home, his forever home.
Meddaâs house was sodifferent. The first day he arrived, he knew that within minutes of walkingthrough the door. Jack had his own room, to start. His desk was the highlight.It had art supplies on it. Not a ton, just colored pencils and charcoal. But itwas so much more than he had been able to have in years. He started high schooland he was able to enroll in Drawing and Painting. It was life changing. Histeacher was amazing, he encouraged Jack in everything he did. He pushed him tobecome a better artist. When Jack set his sights on the Rhode Island School ofDesign, he half expected his teacher to laugh at him. Instead, he helped Jackdevelop his portfolio.
âArt,â Mr. Denton toldJack, âis being willing to bleed and let others watch.â
Jack took those words toheart. He drew what had happened to him all those years ago, reopening woundsthat had scabbed over long ago. He drew faint memories of his mother, based onthe few pictures he had left of her. He drew his world during the time he hadnâtbeen able to draw. He was accepted on a full scholarship. Those four yearschanged Jack. He saw art differently after it and he did art differently. Hecould see more than just the shapes and lines that made up a piece. He couldsee the unbridled emotion, the pain, the joy that went into each piece. Hisemotions fueled his art, pushing him to do better, to share in an intimate withpeople what had happened to him. That didnât pan out as a career at first. Hehad no idea what to do with his degree after he graduated. He did politicalcartoons for an online magazine, took commissions online, and worked other oddjobs. The starving artist was a reality for him, there were many days when allhe could have to eat was a package of ramen. When a gallery contacted him aboutshowcasing his pieces, he was floored. A professor had recommended him. So hehad gotten to work. He only had half the amount of drawings he needed and onlya quarter of the paintings. His first opening was nothing less than a success.He sold all his paintings and nearly all his drawings. After that, itsnowballed. More galleries wanted to show his work and more people wanted to buyit. He was a success, in almost everyoneâs eyes. He didnât have to work oddjobs to make ends meet, he moved into a better apartment, he didnât have to worryabout going hungry.
It was four years afterhe graduated college that Jackâs life turned upside down. It was a galleryopening, full of stuffy people that Jack couldnât stand. He had to wear a suit,which made him uncomfortable. He was never good at this side of things. Hisstudio, in paint covered clothes, thatâs where he shined. He stood in thecorner, nursing some drink probably worth more than Jackâs entire outfit. Hewent back out to mingle after a moment, tugging on his tie gently.
âWouldnât do that if Iwere you. People will think you donât belong.â A voice said behind him, lightand teasing.
Jack turned, searchingfor the source. His eyes landed on a sandy haired man that looked to be aroundthe same age as him, dressed far too casually to be a guest. He was wearing agrey blazer with a white t shirt underneath, along with jeans and a pair ofconverse. Jack noticed the camera, then the press badge around his neck. Aphotographer. âMaybe I donât. Maybe I snuck in.â
The man laughed. âConsideringthat your signature is on the corner of all the paintings, I highly doubt it.âHe held his hand out. âCharlie Morris, but you can call me Crutchie.â It was onlythen that Jack noticed the silver crutch tucked under his arm. The man-Crutchie- grinned. âYouâre wondering if itâs demeaning. Yes, but itâs betterthan having people call me it behind my back.â
Jack nodded slowly. âMakessense. How did you recognize me, Crutchie?â
Crutchie shrugged. âIâvebeen to a couple of your gallery openings before. Iâm a fan.â
Jack nodded again and glancedat the time. There was still an hour and a half before he got to make his exit.He looked around the room, observing the people. Most were rich, boring snobsonly there because they wanted to appear cultured. There was the occasionalcollege student, some obviously forced there by a professor but also some wholooked genuinely interested in the art. It was always an interesting blend ofpeople at these things, people from totally separate worlds colliding over onecommon thing. He heard the click of a camera and turned back to Crutchie.
Crutchie shrugged. âSorry,itâs my job. My editor would kill me if I didnât come back with at least onegood shot of you, considering Iâve been to three of your openings and gottennone.â
Jack nodded again, takinga sip of his drink. âNo worries.â He sat down on one of the benches, pattingthe space beside him. âWant to interview me too?â
Crutchie sat down, shakinghis head with a laugh. âNo, not that type of reporter. Iâd rather capture themoment in a picture than in words.â
Jack looked over. âThatâsâŠoddlybeautiful.â
Crutchie grinned. âIâvegot a knack for oddly beautiful.â He snapped a picture of the crowd gathered infront of one painting. It was one of Jackâs favorites. It depicted the sunsetting over the city of Santa Fe. Jack had traveled there the previous yearand loved it. The air felt cleaner, the people were friendly. It was sodifferent from New York, with its constant hustle and bustle. He loved the citybut he often wondered what it would be like to live somewhere else, somewherecalm. The rest of the night passed much like that, Jack and Crutchie makingidle chatter while Crutchie took pictures of the art, the people, and Jack. Atthe end of the night, Jack felt slightly disappointed. Usually he tried tosneak out early but he stayed until the end, Crutchie making the time passquickly.
âThanks. Tonight wasactually fun.â Jack said as they collected their coats. âCrutchieâŠcan I getyour number? Maybe we could get a cup of coffee or something.â
Crutchie grinned. âThoughtyouâd never ask.â They exchanged numbers and went their separate ways. Thatnight, Jack began a new piece. It was a depiction of two men standing closetogether, all while a crowd swirled around them.
One coffee date turnedinto two and then three and then they turned into dinner dates until finally,almost two months later, Jack asked Crutchie to be his boyfriend. They werelaying on Jackâs couch one night, Jack nearly asleep. Crutchie was staring athis laptop, looking at something quite intently. Jack didnât know what. Hishead was pillowed against Crutchieâs chest, curled between the other manâslegs.
âJack?â Crutchieâs voicebroke the silence, one hand stroking through Jackâs dark hair gently. âCan Iask you something?â
âMhmâŠâ Jack mumbled,pressing his lips to Crutchieâs neck.
âIâŠIâm looking at yourpaintings.â Crutchie bit his lip. âWhy are some of them soâŠdark?â
Jack sat up then, lookingat Crutchieâs laptop. One of his older paintings was on the screen. A youngboy, trying to climb out of a hole while dark hands pulled him down. He wincedslightly. He hadnât told Crutchie anything about his past, not really. He knewJack was adopted and that he was transgender, but that was the extent of it. Jacktook a deep breath, trying to figure out how much he should say.
âSomeone told me oncethat to create true art you must be willing to bleed and let others watch. IâŠIwas four when my mom died.â Jack began. âShe was a good mom, Crutchie. She didnâtcare when I said I was a boy, she encouraged me even. She called me Jack. She lovedme. When she died, I was too young to really understand. I just knew that shewas gone and I had to live with other people. People who werenât as nice aboutthings. They called me Jessica and made me wear dresses and stuff. That wasmost of my foster families, I went through quite a few. The worst was when Iwas twelve. TheyâŠThey made me go to therapy, which was just their stupid pastortelling me that if I didnât stop my âsinning waysâ Iâd go to Hell. They made mego to their church every Sunday and I had to wear dresses and skirts to schoolevery day. The mom did my hair with these stupid bows and she put makeup on me.TheyâŠThey took away my art. I wasnât even allowed to doodle. If I did, I wasgrounded for a week. They thought that art was driving me away from God. SoâŠIstarted hurting myself. That went on for about a year. My social worker foundout and she got me out. Thatâs when I went to live with Mom.â His voice wasshaking slightly, he had sat up fully and his head was bent, staring at theground with his hands clasped in front of him. It was easier than looking atCrutchie.
âWhen I started schoolafter I went to live with Mom, I got to take art classes. The art teacher wasamazing. Mr. Denton. He cared about me. Heâs the entire reason I kept doingart, heâs the reason I got into school. Without him, I wouldnât be who I amtoday. Heâs the one who told me that I had to use my pain in my art. Thatâs whysome of my stuff is so dark. That pain, IâŠI have to try and expose it. Everytime I draw or paint or anything, I have to try.â Tears were swimming in hiseyes, he tried to hold them back.
Crutchie was silent for amoment. He slowly set his laptop on the coffee table, then wrapped his armsaround Jack. âJackâŠâ
âIâm sorry.â Jack mumbled.He pulled away and wiped his eyes. âI shouldnât have laid all that on you.â
âJack, Iâm yourboyfriend. Iâve laid plenty on you.â Crutchie brought his hand up and wipedJackâs eyes carefully. âThatâs what Iâm here for.â He kissed Jack softly then,pulling him closer. âI love you.â
Jack froze. They had beendating for three months and hadnât yet said those words. Jack knew though thathe loved Crutchie. On a certain level he thought that maybe he had fallen inlove with Crutchie that first night, at the gallery opening. âI love you too.âHe murmured, turning and kissing Crutchie more firmly. He clung to Crutchie,the only person he had expressed to in words everything that he tried to say inhis art.
Over the next  few years, artcritics and fans would debate a change in Jack Kellyâs style. It was lighter,happier. The colors were more vibrant. It was a subtle shift, something thathappened over a long period of time. Most people liked it, some didnât. Jack couldnât care less either way. Theyall seemed to agree that Jackâs change seemed centered on a person, a blonde man whofeatured in his sketches and paintings often.
#jackcrutchie#jack#jack kelly#Crutchie#crutchie morris#charlie morris#newsies#fansie#fansies#newsie#carrying the banner#king of new york#tw self harm#my fic
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New Man Part 3 // Rolling in the Deep (Biadore) - Fucking Awful.
A/N: Back with Part 3 of the New Man saga! Another 3500 words of Biadore angst that I swear is going to get happy in a chapter or so. I think there will be 5 chapters, maybe a 6th. Few things:
First, funny story: âFucking Awfulâ was actually supposed to be the name of Chapter 2, but because Iâm a dumbass and donât understand the naming conventions it ended up as my author name. AND I AM SO HAPPY ABOUT IT because you know what, I am fucking awful.
Second: This is back in Dannyâs POV. I like switching back and forth, but I feel I get Danny (or the version of him that lives in my trash brain) a little better. There are few train of thought moments, designated by italics.Â
Third: Back to song inspiration, this time from a different British redhead â the goddess Adele, and âRolling in the Deep.â (Link:Â https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYEDA3JcQqw) No one is singing, its just a soundtrack to what happens here. Lyrics are in italics AND indented.Â
Fourth: Let me know if these are too long and wordy. Itâs something I get critiqued on professionally, so Iâm keen to reel in unnecessary words in my creative/for fun writing.
Alright thatâs it, hope you enjoy this! XOXO Fucking Awful
 âOh shut UP!â Danny yelled at no one in particular, grasping blindly for his phone to shut off the alarm. âFuck! Shit! Balls!â He finally managed to quiet the Marimba. 10:12am. An hour and 33 minutes until Johnny would be there to pick him up. Just enough time for a run â Danny was into fitness now â and a shower before brunch with his friends andâŠoh God.
Danny remembered he had to see Roy today, and out came a full body groan. He had spent the last 2 weeks telling his crew how excited he was for them to meet Roy â his Willow and his best friend, not just that guy from TV. But now everything was so utterly fucked, and after last night he could barely look at Roy let alone fawn over him at a bottomless brunch. Dragging himself out of bed and into workout clothes, Danny mentally prepared for what was coming.
Roy is cheating on his boyfriend. Roy is trying to cheat on his boyfriend with you. You basically told him to fuck off and that you donât want to know him anymore. Now you are going to spend the whole day with him. Party.
He was now fully awake, partially from the blast of cold Seattle air but mostly from seething anger. What in the fuck did Roy think he was doing? The Haylock he knew wasnât a cheater, he wasnât even into open relationships. Moreover, he knew infidelity was the ultimate sore spot for Danny.
Theyâd talked about this a million times, and Danny had probably cried about it a million more. Adoreâs free love persona had made a lot of guys think they could take advantage of Danny, both cheating on him and using him as an instrument of their own cheating. Every time it crushed Danny, made him feel worthless. A committed relationship is a committed relationship, and stepping out on a partner is the ultimate sign of betrayal and disrespect. Fuck that guy (Kyle? Tyler? Who cares.) that Roy was dating, but he still didnât deserve to be cheated on.
And Danny didnât deserve to be treated like a whore. That Roy thought Danny would be ok with being the Other Man was what hurt and angered him the most. Danny could feel his heart racing as he stretched. He had to calm down and play this afternoon all flazeda, so his friends wouldnât ask questions. He knew they saw Roy making out with the stranger, something they were sure to ask about, but thereâs no way they saw the 7 seconds in Heaven outside. If Danny could just act normally, he could help Roy deflect uncomfortable quest â
âOh fuck THAT!â Again, to no one in particular. He knew what he was listening to for the next five miles, on a loopâŠ
Thereâs a fire starting in my heart Reaching a fever pitch, and itâs bringing me out the dark
â
An hour and a half later, Danny was showered and getting ready â still blasting âRolling in the Deepâ on repeat.
Finally I can see you crystal clear Go âhead and sell me out, and Iâll lay your shit bare
The âchillâ plan was no more. Some combination of Adele and adrenaline transformed hurt and disappointed Danny into a pissed off, vengeful queen. He was rocking an all-black look to brunch â hair tied back under a beanie, long sweater and t-shirt, jeans and Docs â but he painted on some red eye shadow for a little extra fire.
In the years he had known Roy, Danny had never been really and truly mad at him. Annoyed or frustrated, sure, but never angry. So this full-body heartburn of rage that was coursing through his veins and shooting out his fingertips was strange to say the lest. Â
See how I leave with every piece of you Donât under estimate the things that I will do
âIf youâre going to listen to music about a woman scorned, shouldnât you at least play Lemonade?â Johnny let himself into the apartment, sneaking past Danny who was too wrapped up in belting along with the track.
âBeyoncĂ© may be the queen, but Adele is still good shit.â Danny didnât even glance up, finishing the smoky rust around his lids. âPlus this track fucking goes.â He turned up the stereo louder with one hand, swiping on mascara with the other.
Johnny reached over to stop the music. âSpeaking of going, we have to. Jinkx is picking up Royâ â Danny flinched imperceptibly - âand everyone else is already there. If we donât leave now weâre gonna beâŠOh, Iâm sorry. Is heroin chic a daytime look now?â Johnny raised an eyebrow.
Danny smirked and chucked his mascara at his cousin. âFuck all the way off, letâs go.â
â
Baby I have no story to be told But Iâve heard one on you and Iâm gonna make your head burn
Much to Johnnyâs chagrin, the Adele fest continued in the car. The full 20-minute drive was spent listening to the thumping kick-drum and haunting chorus, Danny swatting his hand away anytime he tried to switch the music.
âDude, câmon. This is the eighth time; can we please listen to literally anything else?â
âNo. I need to feelâŠempowered.â Danny didnât want to elaborate.
âEmpowered to do what? Look, I know some weird stuff happened last night â great job making it awkward, by the way, donât think we didnât all notice â but can we please not make a scene today? I have people to impress.â
Danny knew that Johnny was trying to date one of his new friends, and he was fully in support of his cousin getting it in. âIt wasnât me who â I didnât â ok.â Instead of turning it off, Danny reached over and cranked the music louder.
Think of me in the depths of your despair Make a home down there, âcause mine sure wonât be shared
If he wasnât going to say anything to Roy, at least he could feel the revenge fantasy for the rest of the drive.
â
The table of 15 was taking up the back patio of a little hipster spot in Capitol Hill. Johnny had almost immediately broken off to make romantical moves, so Danny settled into the open seat opposite Roy and Jinkx.
âHey Danny! Doesnât someone look nice today!â Jinkx had a smile plastered on his face, while Roy sat next to him looking more than a little sullen.
Danny reminded himself to keep it together, for Johnnyâs sake. âThanks! Felt pretty chill when I woke up this morning, but it wouldnât be me without something a little ratchet.â Good, normal conversation.
âWell jeez, way to assume he was talking about you queen.â The words flew out of Royâs mouth so fast, he almost looked like he was surprised he said them out loud. Danny reacted sharply, brow furrowed and lip curled as he shook his head ever so slightly.
âI was, of course I was!â Danny heard a muffled THUD under the table, and saw Roy flinch. âI love it. Seattle looks good on ya, kid. Doesnât it, Roy?â Danny thought it was strange that Jinkx was speaking to Roy like he was scolding a toddler.
âOf course, Iâm kidding.â More strangeness, Roy sounded almost sheepish. âYou look great. You always look great.â
We couldâve had it all Rolling in the Deep
As angry as he was, Danny couldnât help smile at the complement. How did Roy continue to have this effect on him?
You held my heart inside your hand And you played it to the beat
âYeah well, adopting the finer points of your clown makeup has its perks. Color can be a good thing.â Roy smiled a bit at that, melting Danny like ice in the desert.
What the fuck are you doing? Remember how you feel!
Danny snapped out of it. âIâm fucking starving, what are you guys getting? Jesus, what food could we even fit here? Thereâs no space.â He made a show of feeling cramped, and hollered across the table. âKatie, can we try to ââ
âWell hey there bitches, room for one more?â
Danny whipped around, as if he needed to see who it was to know the voice. Entrance sisters are forever, after all.
âNot for you, you sneaky little shit! Youâre back early!â He jumped out of his seat to hug DeLa, who wasnât supposed to be back from Australia for another three days. God, Danny was happy to see Ben.
âYeah well, for a penal colony the Land Down Under is surprisingly low on eligible dick. I think Iâve made my way through the entirety of New South Wales at this point.â DeLa waved to the rest of the table before making his way over to Jinkx and Roy.
âDid you borrow my sailboat to get back here, you twat? Come âere.â Roy stood up to hug the queen, too. Danny was surprised how happy Roy was to see Dela, they were friends but he didnât know they were that close.
âNo grandma, we have planes now. I left the Nina, Pinta and Santa Maria safely in your boat house,â Ben quipped back as he went to hug Jinkx.
âNot bad, fruit fly. Not bad.â Roy sat down and Dela rounded the table back to Danny, who had made space for him.
âSo, catch me up. Howâs it going?â For half a second, Danny swore he saw Ben look meaningfully at Roy and then Jinkx. âIsnât this just a great little reunion ââ THUD. There was that muffled sound again, but this time it was Ben flinching.
âSorry guys, I know itâs cramped and we keep hitting each other.â Danny apologized.
âItâs fine Danny, really. Everyone just needs to be a little more careful.â Jinkx smiled tightly. Now the pointed looks were coming from him, Danny was sure he saw it.
Whatâs going on? Why are they being weird?
Oh well, nothing a few Bloody Marias wonât fix.
â
An hour later the whole table was on the spectrum of tipsy to trashed, with the notable exception of the stone cold sober Roy. Dannyâs sense of weirdness was replaced with the warm buzz of micheladas, tequila and good friends. Thereâs a reason the Lord blessed us with bottomless brunches on the Sabbath. Listening to the laughter and seeing the connection between friends new and old, Danny started to think maybe he could be chill.
Their food plates had barely hit the table when that image shattered, again. Poor Dela, he knows not what he does.
One of Dannyâs new girlfriends, Sam, was telling him and Ben about her upcoming coupleâs vacation. âSo yeah, 5 days in Cabo to celebrate our anniversary, or month-iversary I guess. 5 days alone â I think I love that woman, but pray for me.â Sam took a drink.
âDamn, Sam. I didnât realize you and Charlotte had been together for two months already. Thatâs rad.â Danny liked Sam a lot, and was glad to see her happy.
âTwo months, thatâs a big one.â Ben paused for a beat before winding around to face Roy and Jinkx, who were shouting across the table at Johnny and his new âfriend.â
âThatâs about the time you figure out if a relationship is going to work,â Ben continued. Another pause, and there was that damn pointed look at Roy again. Jesus, was he drunk already?
âSpeaking of which â Roy, youâve been with Sky for about 2 months now. Howâs that going?â
Ben shouted the question loud enough to disrupt Royâs conversation, which had the unfortunate effect of getting the whole tableâs attention. The whole table who had been at the bar last night and witnessed Royâs and Dannyâs little display. Silence washed over them like goddamn Hurricane Katrina, leaving Dela very clearly confused if only for a second.
Danny immediately saw red. It wasnât just the eye shadow creeping into his corneas, or the deep scarlet brunch cocktails â he was pissed. âYeah Roy, how is Sky?â Danny asked, nearly shouting. He could feel the anger building.
Youâre gonna wish you Never had met me
âWhy didnât you bring him with you? Didnât think he would have fun?â The power of angry Adele was rising in his chest.
Tears are gonna fall Rollinâ in the deep
âI mean, what about this trip wouldnât be fun for him? Jinkx has never met him. Dela hasnât met him. In fact, neither have I. Wouldnât he want to meet your sisters? Your best friend? Why wouldnât he want to meet me, Roy?â
Johnny interjected. âIâm sure he was busy. Danny why donât you switch over to water?â God bless him, like any good cousin was trying to stop the train of destruction. Danny was too far down this hill to pull back.
âNah, Iâm good man. Tell me, why didnât he come here?â He focused all his attention, staring at Roy with enough intensity to clear his blurring vision while burning a hole in eyes of the man looking back at him.Â
Now it was Jinkxâs turn to try. âDanny, drop it. Youâre yelling.â
âNo Iâm not. And youâre not my mom, Jinkx. I just want an answer to my question.â Danny never took his eyes off Roy, whoâs body seemed to wilt while his eyes stayed locked.
âI didnât mean to cause a problem guys, I ââ Dela looked totally panicked.
Fire. Heart. Fever. Scars. Breathless. Tears.
The combination of hurt, alcohol and electricity clashed like lightning, and Danny couldnât hold it in anymore.
âIs it because you came here to cheat on him, Roy? You told him you were coming to visit your friends, but really you just came here to fuck some other guys and hope he wouldnât find out?â
If he wasnât yelling before, Danny sure was now.Â
âYou think thatâs who I am, that I donât care about other peopleâs feelings and that Iâll help you hurt them? You think I would be a part of that, that after all these years of pining for you Iâd be so goddamn happy for your scraps of attention that Iâd do it? That Iâd let you jam your tongue down my throat in back alleys and fuck me in secret like your side piece?â
Well, so much for keeping that kiss a secret, Danny thought as he caught his breath. Might as well bring it home.
âYouâre a shitty person, Roy. Youâre a bad, mean, hateful person. You donât care if you hurt people, do you? I never saw it before, but that you would do this to your boyfriend â to meâŠâ
Shit, shit. Donât cry. Do. Not. Cry. Danny couldnât understand why Roy, who had never been at a lack of words for a moment in his life, was just sitting there silently while he railed on. The indomitable Bianca del Rio just sat there staring, and increasingly â he thought, maybe â like he was actually biting his tongue.
âYou donât have anything to say? You canât even defend yourself because you know itâs true. I donât know if youâve always been like this, if something changed, or what the fuck is going on.â Danny paused, starting to feel self conscious about the volume of his voice and the lack of chiming in from any of his friends.
âJesus, Roy. I thought Bianca was an act but the real you is so much worse. I would say I hope Skyâs off fucking someone else too, so you know what it feels like, but youâd have to be a human with emotions to get it. Youâre just a heartless evil cunt.â And with that, Danny was out of steam.
â
The next seconds crawled slowly and quietly enough to hear a pin drop. Danny knew this for a fact, because he literally heard the waitress drop her pen at molasses speed. Then the world slammed back into focus, with the same jarring effect as an astronaut getting ejected into space in a Star Trek movie.
Danny felt all eyes on him â 26 silent, unblinking eyes. The only person not still basking in his impassioned speech was Roy himself, who had finally broken the stare; his eyes were closed, maybe even squeezed together, while he rested his forehead on wringing hands. Danny had never seen this body language before, which was strange because Roy was a true creature of habit. Â
Feeling totally exposed â a feeling he wasnât totally in love with at the moment â but still high on righteous indignation, Danny violently stood up to leave. He threw his credit card down on the table and walked towards the exit, speechless as a silent movieâŠuntil he heard a mumble.
âWhat did you say to me?â Danny turned on his heel, sure he heard Roy say something under his breath. He was ready to fight.
âI said he did, Delano. Sky did. He cheated on me. I walked in on him fucking someone. Two weeks ago.â
Danny didnât go to school for fucking math, but something was clicking. Two weeks ago, cheating, no more SkyâŠdamn the tequila fog.
âYou guys have something in common after all â he said I was too cold to fall in love with. Didnât think I would even care, I canât feel anything anyway.â Roy wouldnât look up as he spoke, his voice was calm and controlled. That was really freaking Danny out â this was his somber voice, the same one he used in the days after Dannyâs dad died.
Whatâs going on? Danny was starting to wonder if heâd miscalculated something here. Fucking continuation school.
âYou should be happy, turns out you already got what you want. I got cheated on, Danny.â Roy paused and finally looked up.
In one fell swoop, Danny realized he was so very wrong. The eyes Roy had been hiding were as red as his own, but colored instead by broken blood vessels and tears. Danny realized why he didnât recognize the body language â heâd never seen Roy cry before.
âHappy, even if youâre wrong. I promise you I feel it.â
In that moment Royâs voice wavered ever so slightly, and Danny felt his whole body come undone. He had to sit back in his chair to keep from falling over, seeing Roy like this turned him to actual human Jell-O.
Fuck. Fuck. Fucking fuck. Fuck. Dannyâs mind raced, trying to figure out what to do. How he could fix this.
âI think I should go,â Roy said to Jinkx, who started to move in response. His voice was back to the unnerving calm. âNo, stay. Iâll get an Uber, you guys have fun. Let me know how much I owe you.â Roy stood up. âEveryone, it was a pleasure to meet you in the daylight. Glad to know my friends are so well taken care of in Seattle.â
No no no, donât leave. What is happening? What are you doing? Danny was screaming internally, but he couldnât figure out what words to say or at this point how to even make sounds come out of his mouth.
âBye, Danny.â
Roy said those two words with such a tenderness and finality, Danny started to panic. He needed to do something but he was immobilized, his brain fried by his earlier surge of emotion and the overload of new information.
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless I canât help feeling we couldâve had it all
And just like that Roy was gone.
#bianca del rio#adore delano#jinkx monsoon#bendelacreme#biadore#angst#tw cheating#rpdr fanfiction#submission#canon compliant#fucking awful#new man
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I hate calling in sick to work. Thatâs a new thing for me, because for the first time in ages I love my job and miss it when I am not there. Mind you, a day off here and there is welcomed, but generally Iâd rather not miss out on anything. Work doesnât FEEL like work most of the time, and I enjoy all of the people and the animals Iâm surrounded with on a daily basis.
Serious moments at work:
  Contrast those moments with this:
Me, at home sick. Not fun.
I used to look for any reason to stay home sick when I was in school. I was a good student, but I was painfully shy. Staying home was much better! Back in the day, when my single mom was at work, she felt it was safe enough that, when I was in about 3rd grade I think, she could leave me home alone. This was the 1960âs in a middle-class suburb on a street of mostly retired people. My older siblings would be home at various points in the day, and mom could check in at lunch. Nothing bad ever happened. The things is, Mom was almost too sympathetic to my dislike of being at school and often let me stay home when I clearly wasnât sick. I never had to resort to any Ferris Bueller antics to convince her to let me stay home.
 I graduated (with good grades), went on to college, and survived just fine. Then I ended up at some point in a job that I hated. Iâll never forget the morning I burst into tears, threw my hairbrush across the room, and wailed to my then-husband, âDonât make me go!â  Was that the first time I called in sick to work when it was really just that I was sick of the job?
Things got better. I switched careers after an interlude of graduate school (I hated school through high school, but I loved college), and spent quite a few years only being sick when I was really sick. And then along came the University of California and 12 years of me wishing to be sick, of fantasizing about breaking my leg in the shower so I could go to the hospital instead of work, of reading hopefully about the sysmptoms of appendicitis. My work ethic had died a slow death. I wasnât so obvious as to call in sick on a regular, clockwork basis, like a colleague in one past job who we all knew would call in sick the day after pay day. Nothing predictable. But maybe calling in sick when I felt a little under the weather but not really sick. I would even gladly go for jury calls and hope to get onto a jury so as to not go to work. I wasnât precisely a bad employee, just a not very dedicated one. Note to any of my former UC colleagues: there were many times I was genuinely sick. Please donât think I ever took advantage of you to get out of anything!
Thatâs all changed now that I am working in animal rescue. Every day brings new rewards and happy endings. Sometimes there are sad endings, too, but I try to keep moving as cheerfully as possible and toast the successes.
I wish I could say I never get sick, but I have whatever this gross lung crud is thatâs going around at the end of 2017. Iâm coughing like crazy, no energy, sounding like a dog with kennel cough. This would be bad enough in any case, but in addition to animals, I also work with potential adopters, and how bad would it look if I started coughing and wheezing in their faces? That would not bring good customer service marks on a Yelp review. I went in last Sunday and it was not pretty. Nobody ran away screaming, but a lot of hand sanitizer was passed around. Iâve stayed home since then.
Iâve had a lot of time on my hands to think. Too much. Here are some of my reflections.
Cats are better nurses than dogs.  They are sensitive, and pick up on subtle things. Or they just really love blankets and warm bodies. But dogs have Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), like âAw, hey sick buddy, let me cuddle with youâŠSQUIRREL! Gotta go!â
  Watching television during the day is no longer fun. When I was home sick as a kid, or even as a teenager, the majority of that time was spent in front of the television. Iâd watch anything. Even though we only got 4 channels back in the dark ages, Iâd find something. I watched cooking shows, exercise shows, reruns in syndication, old moviesâŠMaybe watching Julia Child and Graham Kerr (The Galloping Gourmet) contributed to my love of food and cooking, but I also watched Jack Lalanne and have no love of exercise. Note that I watched Jack Lalanne, I didnât ever get off the couch and do any of the stretches or exercises.  I adored Bewitched reruns. At a young age, I got hooked on soap operas, especially All My Children. My favorite movies were those with Ma and Pa Kettle or Henry Aldrich.
Itâs a wonder I have any brain cells left!
 Now we have TiVo, Netflix streaming, binge watching, endless channels, and I canât stand the idea of watching television during the day. I feel like I have succumbed to true hopelessness if I watch. Nighttime is another story altogether, though. Which leads to:
Folding TV trays are a great 20th century invention. They donât have to be for eating meals in front of television, although we use the old set we bought for $25 at the flea market for that pretty much every night. They are great for holding all of your medications, tissues, water glass, etc. next to you while you are curled up in your favorite cozy spot. I also use them to hold stacks of books and papers when I am at my desk writing and I run out of desk space.
I found the almot exact set we have online, although the colors were less faded, where they were advertised as âvintage Eames eraâ. If you arenât familar with the Eames name, Charles and Ray Eames were the noted mid-century designers who, by using their names, you add a gazillion dollars to the price of something.
I really donât think Charles or Ray Eames had anything to do with these.
Ray and Charles Eames at home, LIFE magazine, 1950.
 Life is too short to stick with a book you arenât enjoying. This is a recent revelation for me. I always doggedly stuck to books I wasnât enjoying as if it was somehow a virtue. No more! So many books, so little time. Iâm not wasting that time anymore. The only time I can remember abandoning a book previously was in 2001, with German writer W. G. Seboldâs Austerlitz. It won the National Book Critics Circle Award that year. Sebald, who died at age 57 that same year, was considered by many to be a great author and possible future winner of the Nobel Prize in Literature until his unexpected death in a car crash. The novel sounds like it ought to be great, but I found it inscrutable. I was about 5 pages in, and I think it was still the first sentence continuing from the first page, running on and making no sense to me. I threw in the towel, figuring I wasnât smart enough for Sebald.
 I was recently defeated again. Not because I wasnât smart enough, I just didnât care what happened to any of the characters. At all. Any of them. This time it was Eleanor Cattonâs The Luminaries, winner of the Man Booker prize in 2013. Maybe I should avoid books that win critics awards? This huge tome (848 pages) was donated to the Little Free Library I steward. I was intrigued. It was free. I needed something to read that would occupy me through a flight to Iceland and back, as well as any down time in between. Never mind that I could barely lift it. We went to Iceland in the summer. It is now very close to January of the next year. I got about 200 pages in. I couldnât keep track of who was who. I didnât care.  Finally, common sense (well, actually it was Bobâs common sense) had me send the book back out into the Little Free Library this morning. I want to enjoy my reading time, and if one of the rare chances I get to lose myself in a book is when I am sick, itâs not going to be a book that is torture to read. I saw somewhere that The Luminaries was being made into a limited television series. Yippee.
Now I am free to read a book that sounds right up my alley: The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry by Rachel Joyce. It sounds utterly charming, quirky, and very British. Iâm in!
   Color coordinated clothing and clothing that isnât pajamas are over-rated. Iâm wearing might-as-well-be-pajamas clothes right now. Leggings, old stretchy cardigan, pulled-out-of-shape knit skirt. I am neither color-coordinated nor fashionable at this moment either. Am I warm and comfortable? YES! I figure Iâve always been more of a âfashion donâtâ than a âfashion do.â Whatever. My sisters both have amazing senses of style and fashion. My mother despaired of my disdain for matching handbags and shoes, for scarves, for all of the little details that pull an outfit together. One of the reasons I hated high school was the judgment being passed based on appearances and wardrobe. I was smart and cute enough. Why wasnât that enough? Not having the right label of jeans or shoes seemed (still seems) such a stupid basis for popularity and friendship.
What Not to Wear. Unless youâre me!
In a brief moment as I was putting this sick-day outfit on, I thought, âNone of the blue tones go together.â And immediately after that I thought, âTell that to Mother Nature when a field of wild flowers of all different colors and tones is in bloom.â Colors go together. Period. Somebody told me once that the outfit I was wearing looked like a fruit salad. Cool, thatâs what I say.
 Take care of yourself. Stay warm. Eat healthy, whole foods. Remember to splurge on a bit of dark chocolate and other things you enjoy now and then. If you do get sick, stay home.  Itâs best for you, your co-workers, and anyone you might come into contact with. If you are lucky, like me, it will be that much better when you get back to the job you love. And please, consider getting a pet from your local shelter.
Things Iâve thought way too much about while home sick I hate calling in sick to work. That's a new thing for me, because for the first time in ages I love my job and miss it when I am not there.
#Austerlitz#Bewitched#calling in sick#Charles and Ray Eames#clothes that are like pajamas#color-coordinated clothing#daytime television#Eleanor Catton#Ferris Bueller&039;s Day Off#folding tv trays#Graham Kerr#Henry Aldrich#Jack Lalanne#Julia Child#Little Free Library#Ma and Pa Kettle#Man Booker Prize#National Book Critics Circle Award#Rachel Joyce#sick days#The Galloping Gourmet#The Luminaries#The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry#W. G. Sebald
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007: The World is not Enough Lets talk about a potential recipe for disaster. Upon dropping the ball with the disappointing Tomorrow never Dies, the first Bond Game post Goldeneye, EA, the new holder of the Bond license went back to the exact same developer, Black Ops Entertainment, to make The World is Not Enough. The Result: actually, Black Ops completely made up for their mistake with a surprisingly good First Person shooter. While the PS1 version isn't on par with the Eurocom developed Nintendo 64 version, it is a completely different game and a good one in it's own right. No dual analog controls here, but single analog controls similar to those found in Goldeneye. Definitely worth a look. Alien Resurrection This is one to play with the lights on. The tense atmosphere will keep you on your toes in this game. This hit near the end of the PS1's lifetime, and is a solid, but very challenging FPS. The enemies are numerous, check points far apart, and the ammo is in short supply. It's a tough, but satisfying experience. It also supports Dual analog control, and even the PS1 mouse for aiming. Alien Trilogy This being the older of the two Aliens games on the PS1 is less atmospheric than Resurrection, but still has a great atmosphere. If you're still a fan of Doom style games, then this should be right up your alley. Essentially this is Doom in the Aliens universe. Perhaps a bit of an over-simplification, but if you still love classic doom, then look into trilogy. Armorines: Project Swarm Even for it's time, Armorines was a pretty average First Person Shooter. I happen to own it on the PS1 and N64. The PS1 version allows for a modern dual analog setup with some tweeking to the control settings. It also seems to move a lot faster than the N64 version which feels slightly sluggish in comparison. The PS1 version looks much uglier, and literally slows down into a slideshow at times in two-player cooperative play. If you are collecting for the PS1, this is not a bad pickup, but if you have the choice between them, the Turok-Engine running N64 version is probably the better buy. Codename: Tenka Also known as lifeforce Tenka in Europe has the distinguished honor of being the first fully Polygonal First person Shooter on the PS1. It's gameplay is simple get the key and open the door with a few puzzles added here and there. Tenka won't thrill every gamer, but I've always found it's gameplay engaging, and kind of disorienting at the same time. This is definitely not one for people who are not into oldschool shooter design with pre-analog controllers, and it certainly won't be the best on the PS1 for those who are. It is still worth a look, and the soundtrack is rocking with the trademark Psygnosis electronic beats. There is also some melodramatic story elements in between the levels Delta Force: Urban Warfare The original PC Delta Force series was one of the earliest modern/tactical shooter series', but Urban warfare is more goldeneys than tactical shooter. Released in 2002, urban warfare is an objective based modern FPS. It's a little choppy, but it's still one of the best looking PS1 games ever released, and what's better, it's actually a fun game to play. There were some people who even made claims around the time the game was released that the graphics were PS2 quality. As stated, level setup is similar to Goldeneye, but with a more tactical feel. If I had to compare it, it feels more like a modern Medal of Honor than being more comparable to the arcadey feel of Goldeneye. The missions have a good variety to them, and this also supports dual analog control for more precise aiming. Disruptor And you thought that Resistance Fall of Man was Insomniac's first foray into the first person shooter genre. Disruptor adds it's own twist to the formula by adding psyonic attack abilities. The level designs, while not the greatest ever seen are still solid. The game still plays well considering the age, and the old-school design style. And lets not forget the epic Full Motion Video sequences that take place as...um...the reward for beating levels? Doom Custom Playstation Edition This Custom Playstation edition of Doom features levels from the original Doom, and Doom II. How many levels when compared to the PC versions? I really cannot say, as I am far from a Doom expert. This Playstation port, is less of a direct port of Doom, and would best described as Doom Remix as some changes have been made like adding color lighting, a new, moody, ambient soundtrack nixing the midi compositions of the PC version, and even adding some Doom II enemies into the original Doom. Duke Nukem: Total Meltdown This PS1 port moves so increasingly fast that I couldn't even keep the gameplay in sync with the Saturn and N64 versions in an old comparison video I made. As far as the levels and features, it's the closest port to the PC original. It also has an excellent remixed soundtrack. Visual glitches aside, this game moves fast, and still retains the great design and gameplay first seen in the PC version. It even supports the dual analogs, but not well, and has link-cable multiplyer. Final Doom I've have still yet to play much of this PS1 port, but it, apparently, doesn't have all the levels of the PC original. In fact, they actually threw in 13 levels from the The Master Levels of Doom 2, but it still retains the classic Doom gameplay in moody atmospheric environments (colored lighting) with the ambient music of the first PS1 port. If you appreciate the smooth Gameplay and moody-Doom atmosphere of the original, and Doom 64, this is a no-brainer. Kileak: The DNA Imperative This PS1 Launch game can best be described as an early experiment in 3Dgaming. I am not sure if I fully consider it a first person shooter as it has none of the established norms of the genre like competent level designs or fun gameplay. I guess I wouldn't say the game is horrible, just incredibly bland and uninspired, granted I haven't played very far into it, so maybe it gets much better later on. Looking back, as a launch game, I could actually imagine early PS1 adopters being memorized by this one, but it certainly has no aged well at all. Medal of Honor I really do no have to tell anyone about Medal of Honor, so instead I will tell you what I like about the original over later high production entries into the series. What I love about the atmosphere in this game is that is goes more into the mythos of World War II as opposed to being a large battle style game. It has more of an Indiana Jones or James Bond feel to it than a Saving Private Ryan feel. It dives deeper into the rich historical-based mythology of the War and has, in my opinion, a much richer and unique atmosphere than the recent lets-coppy-Call-of-Duty-which-first-copied-us entires in the series. The original was also the first Shooter to use the WWII setting in a historically accurate way. Wolfenstein had nazis in it, but Medal of Honor was the first to really use the historical setting in an atmospherecally right way. Medal of Honor: Underground I have owned Underground for years, but have still yet to play it further than the first mission. Underground follows the plight of a woman in the French resistance. This one also goes into the mythology of the War, and even seems to explore Nazi Occult Practices. Men in Black- The Series: Crashdown This one surprised me. I must have received it in a ebay game lot, because I don't fully remember how I acquired it. I decided to pop it in to play test it, just to see how bad this licensed game I had never heard of was only to find, surprisingly a competent fully 3D fist person shooter based off the Men in Black Cartoon. I thought I was pretty knowledgeable about the PS1's library, but I had never even heard of this game, and never even seen it covered in the magazines at the time either. I have only played about three levels into it, so I cannot comment on the overall quality, but from what I have played I enjoyed. Sometimes licensed games have some surprising quality to them. PO'ed Ever play a game that makes you ask âWhat the heck am I playing?â this 3DO to PlayStation port is one of those kinds of games. The zany concept of the protagonist being a being a chef on a space ship that has been overrun by aliens (Steven Segal style), is complemented by a odd cast of enemies and weapon set in what can also be described as experimental early 3D level designs. This is a strange one, but is certainly worth a look. It feels a little sluggish in the controls, but not to a game-ruining point. It also have a fun training mode where you decimate hordes of respawning baddies add infinium. Quake II For the longest time, the PS1 port of Quake II was green eggs and ham to me. I had no interest in playing it. I already owned it on the Nintendo 64, and later acquired the beastly PC version. I wasn't until I finally watched footage of the game in action on Youtube that I finally saw how impressive this game was. A fast paced, fully polygonal fist person shooter with an action focus, very little if any slowdown and even four player split-screen multiplayer. I was incredibly surprised and happily wrong about what has become my favorite First person shooter on the PS1. It's unfortunate release date pitting it against Medal of honor, Final Fantasy VIII and the Dreamcast launch sort of buried this one, however, in terms of fluidity, Quake II leaves all other PS1 shooters in the dust. Star Wars- Dark Forces The humble beginning to what eventually blossomed into the Jedi Knight franchise for Lucasarts, Dark Forces has you playing as Kyle Katarn a former Imperial stormtrooper who defected to the Rebellion. You blast your way through a multitude of Doom inspired levels and hordes of Imperial baddies. The game came under fire for it's blurry, and choppy visuals (those prone to motion sickness, you've been warned), but if you can look beyond that, you'll find a fun and rewarding adventure set in the Star Wars universe. Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: Rogue Spear Obviously, if you have a PC that has been made within the last seventeen years, or earlier, you probably should download the vastly superior PC version of this game if you are looking for your Rainbow Six fix. That being said, the PS1 version of the game is, playable if not incredibly flawed. With the ease of getting your hands on the PC version nowadays, I can only suggest this to PS1 specific collectors, and nostalgic gamers if this was the version you used to own.
#Playstation#doo#duke nukem: total meltdown#Medal of Honor#Medal of Honor: Underground#Video Games#first person wife#first person shooters
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