#making this the verse as if it's taking place during the actual events. but extending over multiple days instead of just one! maybe???

[originmade]

JUVIA LOCKSER - PORTRAYAL MASTER POST

Tags: Headcanons. Asks. Interactions.

This post is to cover all major canon divergences as well as any important details that are worth sharing about my portrayal of Juvia. All of these points remain no matter the verse unless stated otherwise or plotted with specific partners. I truly do not like 90% of Ma.shima's characteristics of Juvia, so she's my OC more than anything. ( also, if any of these look familiar, you probably saw them on my old juvia blog )

1 ) JUVIA IS NOT OBSESSED WITH GRAY AND DOES NOT STALK HIM!! This has always been my biggest gripe about Ma.shima's writing of Juvia, how he had boiled her down to one unhealthy obsession when she has so many important relationships and character development outside of Gray. I might make an entire separate post on this later down the line, but Juvia has a high level of gratitude and thanks towards Gray, and at first she had mistaken these emotions for love and infatuation, but upon further inspection, she realized that those weren't the true emotions she felt towards Gray. That doesn't mean Juvia isn't a hopeless romantic at heart, and would love to have a fairy tale ending with someone, but that someone isn't necessarily Gray.

2 ) Along the lines of Point 1, Juvia did not join Fairy Tail because of Gray. Her joining of Fairy Tail was actually due to Makarov extending an invitation to her following everything with Phantom Lord, which she had initially turned down, but did agree to do a small trial run of the guild. It was only after seeing how much unconditional love and support the guild members had for one another did Juvia accept his offer and join the guild.

3 ) Juvia was not present during the events of Tower of Heaven. Following Phantom Lord's disbandment, Juvia found herself in a place of heavy reevaluation on her entire life. For the first time in her life the rain clouds that followed her were gone and she didn't know what to do about it, so she began wandering and traveling, trying to find her purpose again. She never did end up a the casino where the fire fairies were and thus never got involved in the tower of heaven situation. The Tower of Heaven actually lines up with Juvia's Trial Period in Fairy Tail, still leading her to join the guild during Battle of Fairy Tail.

4 ) Juvia did participate in the S-Class trials, but she was not up for nomination. This one is a bit hard to fully explain or put into the timeline without some plotting ( probably with a Lisanna or someone else ) but I truly believe Juvia did not feel qualified enough to be nominated for an S-Class promotion, even if that was her status in Phantom Lord. She is a very proud woman and feels like she hadn't been in fairy tail long enough to be able to be nominated, and instead was happy to be someone's partner during the trial.

5 ) This one is absolutely petty, but Juvia won the Naval Battle during the GMG. Team B was robbed of many deserved victories during the GMG and I am rectifying this. I refuse to believe that an S-Class leveled mage who was widely known as the Water Element of the Element Four and had the title The Rain Woman that she would have been knocked out by being distracted. Juvia won the Naval Battle, everything else be damned.

6 ) Much like Laxus, Juvia had long term health issues following the battles against Keyes during Tartarous. Because Keyes entire being was made of Bane particles, Juvia had ended up absorbing a large portion of them when in her water body form, leaving a lasting impact on both her body and her magic. Following Tartarous, Juvia isn't able to activate her water body as easily and has to extremely limit her magic use to prevent MDS from coming into effect. Some days are much worse than others but she is having to place severe limits on her magic consumption.

7 ) This is open for adjustments and plotting, but I do still have Juvia leaving with Gray during the 1 year time skip. I am taking from my gray's canon in the fact that he told Juvia he was leaving, but didn't give many specific details about it all. Juvia does shut down about this, but mainly due to deep seated trauma about abandonment due to her childhood. Juvia's poor health upon being discovered by Natsu & Co is due to her magic over exerting itself and the lasting health issues from the bane particles.

8 ) The most important people in Juvia's life is Gajeel & the other element four. She is still actively in touch with the other three following Phantom's disbandment, and Gajeel has always been a consistent in her life, someone who she can easily refer to as her family no matter what. It takes awhile for the rest of Fairy Tail to reach that status, but she does hold most people in the guild with extremely high regards.

More shall be added / this post shall be updated when deemed necessary

[fortjester]

please say more about up the wolves on the playlist i beg

anon i am down on my knees asking you to marry me, of COURSE i will say more about up the wolves

while i feel up the wolves is probably more of a kiriona gaia song at this point, i hesitate to phase it out of the gideon playlist because the roots of it are in in gideon in the first place. here's a poignant quote abt the song before we kick off.

"...when people talk about triumph over adversity, adversity sounds like sort of a faceless sort of a thing that you don't need to triumph over so much as get around. This is a song about triumph over the adversary." - John Darnielle (of the Mountain Goats), at the Newport Folk Festival, 2013

first verse is pretty easy, because that's for sure gideon's inner monologue during htn act 5.

she's been trapped inside of harrow's brain for nine months, not really alive, not really dead, being systematiclaly drowned by harrow's brain, and yes she forgave harrow for her past behaviour, but it's clear by the time we see her again in ntn that she's letting anger take the wheel atm - and who could blame her? so gideon is the "ghost" in this case, but she is also the person finding it hard to forgive. dichotomous.

now, second verse is, to me, the first few chapters of gtn. the Ninth's closest neighbour is the Eighth, so that makes the first lines match up quite neatly. observe:

pg. 26 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

but, ya know, obviously when the Eighth did catch wind of Ninth mischief, they ended up caring more abt gideon's mysterious dead mother than they did about her. additionally, as the song continues, we get these lines:

once again, reiterating that the truth of gideon's treatment isn't important even if they know, to which i gesture broadly at the following snippets:

pg. 19 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

pg. 21 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

so, it's a pointless endeavour, but as gideon later justifies it, says even with no ultimate gain she'd do it, because, "I completely fucking hate you, because you are a hideous witch from hell. No offence." (pg. 27) what a lady. spite really can fuel you to do anything. furthermore, the next line is a sweet little mic drop on the moment to me:

pg. 19 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

up the wolves is one of the Mountain Goats' many "anti-revenge songs", this theme of useless rebellion and spite really intertwines nicely with gideon's early character arc. i also snagged this quote abt the song off the genius lyric page because it sums up my early thoughts really nicely abt why this fits gideon.

like, does that not scream "gideon" to everyone? am i alone here? hello? is it just me and mr. darnielle and gnav?

to finish up, here's some nice comparatives/parallels from the chorus:

pg. 23 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

this (of course) refers to the story of romulus and remus (the former of whom would later found rome) being abandoned to die of exposure by their mother. gideon wasn't so much abandoned as put on a backburner, as wake was briefly inconvenienced from her main goal by dying. nonetheless, gideon's mother exists only as a story to her, and she grows up almost completely alone, like romulus and remus.

pg. 456 & 457 (paperback), Nona the Ninth

the "party" referred to here in the story of romulus and remus is actually the murder of their father (who ordered them to be killed so that he might avoid them ever inheriting his throne) and the reinstatement of their grandfather to the throne. romulus then went on to murder remus over a disgreement over where to build their own city (rome). in gideon's case, the murder is of crux, but could also extend to whatever's going on w her and john both before the events of ntn and whatever's gonna happen in atn. in either case of where the party of her coming home is, it's a bitter return, and i don't think she enjoyed herself, which sucks.

last one, i swear

pg. 20 (paperback), Gideon the Ninth

[goldenmusicmoments]

It Is Time For An Intermission:

Maren Morris drops an extended play as a layover to her next album. She uses this short record to address things that she felt she needed to get off her chest. She’s had some significant life events take place and she’s been on a journey of figuring life out now that she is single again. So lets take a dive into this release.

The extended play opens with the first release ‘Cut!’ which features Julia Michaels. This pop track makes it clear that Maren has distanced herself from country music, and now is venturing in a new direction. It is a catchy track in which she sings about putting on a front when she is amongst others, however once she is on her own its a different story. This entirety of seeming your okay as you don’t want anyone to know how you really feel, however once in seclusion you let go allowing yourself to feel what you actually feel. The verses feature a prodding beat, however it lifts for the chorus and the outro. Both their voices work great together and the outro finds a way to utilise the title of the extended play.

We move onto ‘I Hope I Never Fall In Love’ which switches up the mood into this more emotive and dreamy moment. Maren doesn’t seem to want to fall in love again, it seems that her previous relationship has put her off. She closes that door with certainty that she’ll not allow herself to fall for someone in that way ever again. There is a throwback vibe to the track due to the production choices. Its percussion led and it would be great choice for a slow dance moment. Her soaring background vocals during the final chorus are beautiful. 

Maren is carefree on ‘Push Me Over’ where she seems to be wanting a situationship, rather than something serious. She wants to live in the moment rather than thinking too much of the situation. Its a playful track that will have you nodding your head to its throwback beat. The production lifts for the bridge and her soaring vocals take over for the final chorus. It is a well crafted song and one that feels infectious in nature. A track that could definitely accompany a workout session. 

‘Because, Of Course’ follows and there is an urgency to the beat here. Here she expresses the extent of her love and she lets it be known that she’ll be there for this person in whatever way they may need. Those one feels grand and powerful, which in turn gives it, its uplifting nature. The chorus immediately draws you in and then the vocals over the final chorus are magnificent, highlighting the power she holds vocally. You as your find yourself fully lost in its vastness. 

Now ‘This Is How A Woman Leaves’ is a perfect note to end the record on. It feels so empowering as she lets it be known that she’s not someone who’s dependent on anyone else. She can do all that she needs herself. This feels vulnerable and powerful at the same time, it has a feeling of intimacy just before it lifts into the grandness of the bridge that fills up the space around you. You feel as though you are being lifted by those soaring vocals and then she brings it back down to end on these lyrics that pack quite the punch. 

Overall this extended play is a great body of work that gets you even more excited for her next full length project. She sings about the demise of her marriage, how its impacted her views in relation to love and how she’s managing on her own. There is vulnerability, power and raw emotions packed into this five track body of work. It is a must listen from amongst this years releases. Maren deserves every ounce of recognition as she is a once in a lifetime talent. 

[andypantsx3]

statistically significant | 1 | bakugou/reader

length: 23,490 words | 7 chapters

summary: You’re the scientist who developed a neural net to model the value of assists. Now that your work is feeding into the hero rankings, pro hero Ground Zero has a bone to pick with your results.

tags: romance, enemies to lovers, sexual tension, reader-insert

warnings: aged up characters, eventual smut, m/f threats of violence, problematic behavior

note: I cannot overemphasize that this interpretation of Bakugou is based on season 1 Bakugou, which means he behaves very questionably at the beginning. Please heed the warnings!

Last year

You had been ferreting snacks out of the Hero Awards when he found you.

In retrospect, the whole idea of attending the Hero Awards had been a bad one from the get go. You’d just been so thrilled by the image of it in your head--getting to see all your favorite pros gathered in one place, dressed to the nines, celebrating their rankings, their wins, their saves, their successes. You’d pictured yourself flitting between heroes, collecting autographs and taking selfies, sitting down at a table with big names like Uravity and Froppy, making fast friends over the complimentary champagne.

But then you’d seen what really went into preparing for and attending an event like this, and the shine had quickly rubbed off.

When your boss at the Commission had extended you the invite, she’d told you that you would be representing the organization, and had advised you to contract a makeup artist and find someone willing to dress you. Her tone had strongly implied that this was more of an order than a suggestion. So you’d done it, but nobody had told you exactly how many hours went into getting your makeup tested, getting fitted and refitted for a dress, and fielding questions on cut, colors, fabrics, and fit.

By the time the Awards rolled around, you’d lost upwards of forty excruciating hours of your life to preparations, and had developed some kind of anxiety-induced Pavlovian response to the modiste’s name on your phone screen, where you immediately wanted to leap into the nearest storage closet and hide. And none of this was even counting the five full hours you spent on the day of the awards getting primped and polished within an inch of your life, then stuffed into some ridiculous scrap of fabric that threatened to fall off of you if you so much as breathed wrong.

By the time the stylists and makeup artist had finished with you, you were starved, cranky, and nursing a small migraine from how enthusiastic the hairdresser had been with you. You’d thought, though, that you would finally be able to enjoy yourself now that the worst was over. All there was left was to attend the ceremony, and get to see all your favorite heroes.

And for an hour or two, the Hero Awards had been just as cool as expected. You lingered on the fringes of the red carpet, gawking as pros like Chargebolt and Pinky swanned their way down the walkway, looking even cooler in real life than they looked on TV. Everyone had clearly gone all out, and they looked unbelievably good, either inhumanly beautiful or inhumanly intimidating. You had been utterly transfixed, as evidenced by the inordinate amount of time you spent accidentally staring at Todoroki Shouto as he gave an interview to the side of the walkway, looking absolutely unreal as he leaned over to speak to the reporter.

When you’d finally managed to snap out of your trance, you’d remembered to cut a beeline for the snack table, and had set about stuffing as many snacks into your dress as you could manage. And that’s where the trouble really started.

The invite to the Awards had come with the option for a very fancy multi-course dinner that you could have chosen. Instead, you’d taken one look at the price and laughed yourself sick, before resolving to sneak a bunch of the free snacks into your dress to keep you occupied during the ceremony. The problem was, the scrap of fabric the modiste had insisted was a dress was so obnoxiously flimsy and could only hold so many snacks.

If your dress had been able to hold a reasonable number of snacks, you wouldn’t have needed to sneak back out to the snack table during the presentation, and he would have never had a chance to catch you on your own. But the dress was lacking snack utility, and so you had gone back out for more.

You kept low in the aisle as you crept out of the darkened theater, keeping a hand over your chest so you didn’t spill out of the thin fabric of your dress, and emerged into the reception hall, where you were almost blinded by the harsh light. You stood for a minute, blinking the spots out of your vision, and touched a hand to your eyes, careful not to smear any of your eyeliner.

And that’s when he struck.

Almost as soon as you raised your hand, a rough hand seized your wrist, wrenching your arm down. A heavy arm went around you quickly, trapping both your arms to your sides, and you barely had time to let out a squeak before a calloused hand clapped over your mouth. Your feet left the floor, and then you were being dragged through a side door into the stairwell.

You twisted wildly, kicking out, trying to catch the wall or the railing to push off of and throw your assailant off balance, but he was strong, and clearly well-versed in combat, as he kept you well away from anything you could use to your advantage. He hauled you out into the stairwell, but instead of heading down the stairs, he moved towards the corner. To your surprise, he tossed you unceremoniously against the wall, letting you go.

You caught yourself on the rough stone and whirled around, only to reel back in shock when you caught sight of your assailant.

Bakugou Katsuki, perhaps better known as pro hero Ground Zero, leaned over you, trapping you against the wall with an arm on either side of you. He, like all the other heroes you’d caught sight of today, looked almost unreal in person, but in stark contrast to all the others, his handsome face was twisted up in unmistakeable fury, blood-red eyes bright with violence and white teeth bared in a silent snarl. Even under the thick fabric of his suit, you could see the hard lines of his body were taught with aggression, and it was all you could do to not shrink back against the cold stone of the wall.

“So,” he snarled, leaning in to put his face close to yours, “you’re the fucking statistics nerd.”

You gaped at him, mouth falling open. Your professional title was data scientist, but statistics nerd was a close enough descriptor that you could tell he knew who you were. Your brows went up, wondering why in the world Ground Zero knew you.

“E-excuse me?” you managed. Your brain rapidly kicked into high gear, running through possible reasons why he would know you, what he could possibly want with you.

Bakugou snarled. “What the fuck is your problem with me?”

You stared at him. Problem with him? Other than the fact that he’d just seized you with no warning and dragged you into a stairwell, you had no problem with him. You’d never even met him--what the hell was he talking about?

“Uh, do you maybe have me confused with someone else?” you asked, trying to shift out from under his arm. Maybe there was another data scientist milling around in the crowds that he’d meant to get his hands on instead.

Bakugou’s red eyes narrowed, and he put a hand to your abdomen to press you firmly back to the wall. “Oh no. You’re not getting out of this, you little brat. Fucking fix it.”

You eyed him warily, checking him for signs of a head injury, wandering over his shock of blonde hair and noting the size of his pupils. Maybe Bakugou had been out on assignment just before the Awards, and hadn’t stopped to get his injuries checked out before coming here. A blow to the head would explain why he was behaving so strangely, and asking for weird stuff.

“Fix what?” you asked, frowning when you couldn’t spot the signs of a concussion on him. His gaze seemed all too focused, all too intent. It was nerve-wracking, actually. You’d heard of his reputation for intensity before, but it was one thing to hear it and another entirely to have all that intensity trained on you.

Bakugou bared his teeth and leaned closer. “Your fucking nerd-ass model. Fix it.”

You froze.

Oh.

Oh no.

Oh, this was about the model. You knew his bone to pick with the model.

The entire reason you’d received an invite to the Hero Awards in the first place was because of your work on the model that calculated the hero rankings. The model had existed for years before you had come along, but this year it was different.

You’d been hired a couple months ago by the Public Safety Hero Commission after you’d contacted them with an idea on how to finally calculate the value of field assists. You’d had a rough prototype of a neural network that you’d trained on video of multi-hero operations, tracking the movements of all the heroes on screen, and had developed an algorithm capable of assigning point values to moves that contributed to but did not directly result in a win or a rescue.

The Commission couldn’t get their hands on your work fast enough, and after only a few months refining your neural net, it was hooked into the rankings model, and it had informed not only the choices for Rescue of the Year and Most Valuable Hero this year, but had entirely changed the hero rankings overall.

And Bakugou’s ranking had been very much affected.

Bakugou Katsuki was a hero very unlike the world had ever seen. Anyone could see from his stats alone that he was incredibly driven, supremely powerful, and almost unmatched by any other hero out there. A few years out from UA, he’d already entered the top ten and had been mere breaths away from the top three -- that is, until your model results had been released.

The thing about Bakugou was that he had a higher percentage of fight wins than any hero in recorded history. He came out on top of almost any situation he entered into, and had one of the highest villain capture stats and the highest villain kill stat as compared to any other hero at this point in their career. The problem was, the new model also now took into account assists, as well as applied slightly heavier weights to rescues, and as good as Bakugou was at winning fights, he was almost equally as terrible at helping others.

So when your model had been worked into the Hero Commission’s official ranking calculations, Bakugou had backslid to sit unhappily at rank number eight.

And apparently, he thought this meant you had a personal grudge.

“Okay, I understand you’re upset, but the results are the results,” you said, watching him carefully. “It’s got nothing to do with you personally.”

His expression darkened thunderously, and the hand on your abdomen grew notably hotter, a scent like gunpowder and burnt sugar rising in the stairwell. “Like hell it doesn’t. Fucking fix it.”

Your brow furrowed. How did regular people think models worked? “There’s no ‘fixing it’, Bakugou. That’s just how math works. If you have a problem with how assists and rescues are weighted then you can take it up with the Commission. I just trained the model with their recommendations, and the results are what they are.”

Bakugou apparently registered none of what you were saying. Rough fingers slid to your jaw, tipping your face up to him. “What is it that you wanted, you damn brat? Did you want to see me humiliated? Or maybe you wanted my attention?” His fingers dug into your jaw. “Well now you have it, you fucking harpy, so show me what you wanted with it.”

You gaped at him, unable to help the way your mouth hung open like a fish. Did he think you were blackmailing him? With a fucking statistical model? It was a matter of public record that Bakugou was smart--he was purportedly one of the brightest minds that had ever graced the profession of hero, with strategic skill and combat sense that was utterly unparalleled--so then why the hell was he being so dumb about this? Was he really so self-absorbed that he thought this whole thing was about him?

Your temper flared, rising like the slow heat that was building under his hands. “I know this might be news to you,” you said slowly, “but not everything is about you. The model I trained takes in video as its input, and calculates rankings based on recommended weighting criteria that the Hero Commission gave me themselves. There is no place for me to input my own biases or change the results, so if the output is something that you’re ashamed of, then maybe you should do better.”

Bakugou’s eyes brightened, narrowing on you with an intensity that made you want to curl into the wall. “Say that again, you little fuck.”

You held your ground, ignoring the dangerous way the scent of hot smoke sharpened, leaning forward to bare your own teeth. “Maybe you should do better, you self-centered asshole.”

You were close enough that you could see his pupils dilate with the challenge, like a predator catching sight of its prey. An unsettling grin made its way across his mouth. “I am going to make you wish you’d never even seen a calculator, you smug fucking nerd,” he said, leaning into you.

The scent of gunpowder burned in the back of your throat, and the hands on you flared alarmingly hot, before the door to the hall burst open, and a whirlwind of red and yellow tore into the stairwell.

“Heya Blasty,” a voice chirped, echoing on the stairs, “Found ya.”

The shock of golden yellow resolved itself into the lean figure of Kaminari Denki, aka pro hero Chargebolt. He quickly made his way to Bakugou’s side, seizing an elbow.

“I’m busy, fuckstick. Fuck off,” Bakugou growled.

A large hand reached over Bakugou’s other shoulder to pull him off you, a head of gelled red spikes materializing behind his back, and you blinked up at Kirishima Eijirou, also known as Red Riot.

“Sorry about him,” Kirishima smiled down at you warmly, in direct contrast to the way his fingers dug into Bakugou’s shoulder. His teeth looked incredibly sharp in person, but this fact somehow failed to detract from the warmth of his friendly expression. You blinked, stunned that you were being addressed by Red Riot.

“He’s been a little worked up since the results were released, but he’s harmless,” Kirishima explained, grunting a little as he jerked Bakugou away from you. Bakugou snarled and turned to his friend, a small volley of sparks lighting off of his palm.

“I said fuck off,” he growled.

You let out a choked laugh at the idea of Bakugou Katsuki being called harmless. Just this week he’d perfected a technique where he melted clean through concrete, and you’d seen the replay of him liquifying the side of a skyscraper on the news this morning as you’d been getting your makeup done.

“Harmless, right. Definitely felt that way,” you uttered as Kirishima struggled to get a grip on Bakugou.

“I’ll fucking show you harmless,” Bakugou spat, turning back to you, sparks crackling louder in his palm. Kirishima seized his chance quickly, getting a bulky arm around Bakugou’s chest and lifting him straight off the ground. Bakugou snarled and gripped Kirishima’s forearm, letting off an explosion that would have blown anyone else’s arm clean off, but Kirishima just laughed, ignoring that the sleeve of his suit had caught fire, and hauled Bakugou back through the door.

A litany of swears filtered back through the door before it swung shut again.

Kaminari turned to face you, smiling sheepishly. “Sorry about that. We didn’t realize he was gonna come after you like that, though I don’t think he would have actually done anything. He’s pretty much all talk.”

You waved a hand, still stunned that Chargebolt was speaking to you.

“Uh, it’s okay,” you said. “I just...didn’t expect that kind of a reaction.”

Kaminari chuckled. “He’s usually a little more chill these days--I think he’s just pissed he’s losing to Midoriya now.” He paused, looking thoughtful. “I gotta say, though, he was even more worked up than I expected when we got here. What did you say to him?”

You grimaced, thinking back on the tense conversation. “That if he was ashamed of his ranking, he should do better.”

Kaminari choked. “Oh fuck, he must have been pissed,” he managed, before dissolving into peals of laughter. “Do better. No wonder he looked like he was gonna give himself a hernia. Mina’s gonna wet herself when I tell her.”

You shifted uncomfortably. “He thinks I altered the results to get his attention.”

Kaminari’s chuckles tapered off as he set a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Oh, he’s just saying that. He knows he’s shit at assists. He’s just salty he’s actually gotta do something about it if he wants to be number one.”

You thought back to the feeling of that hard body pressing you up against the wall, the disdain that had twisted his handsome face, the burning heat that had built up under his palms. A shiver went down your spine. It had seemed like he was a little more than salty, but if that’s how his friend wanted to put it, then fine.

“Well, thanks for the save anyway,” you said, giving Kaminari a little smile. “I’d definitely give you and Kirishima Rescue of the Year if I was pre-determining my results.”

Kaminari laughed, turning back to the door that Kirishima had dragged Bakugou through. As if on cue, a small boom sent the door swinging open a little. “Speaking of which, I’d better get back to make sure I don’t have to rescue the rescuer.”

He gave you a casual wave, then crossed to the door quickly. He hesitated at the threshold, then peeked back over his shoulder at you.

“By the way,” he said. “You might want to take a look at your dress. I, um, think Bakugou may have gotten a little carried away.”

He disappeared before you could ask what he meant, but a quick glance down clarified soon enough. Right on your abdomen, where Bakugou had pinned you against the wall, lay a scorched cut out, exactly in the shape of one large hand.

Your mouth dropped open in horror.

That fucking dick.

[nincompoopydoo]

LOVE IS STRANGE

PAIRING: Poe Dameron x reader WORD COUNT: 1.9k SUMMARY: The union of Ireca and Mohash may seem a typical cliche of love in comparison to your depressingly lonely state, but when a certain poster boy pilot emerges during the celebration, you wonder if love works in other underlying ways. A/N: I found this in my google docs, first written about a year ago. so, wohoo i present to you my first ever poe dameron content, i think? he's so charming and carelessly beautiful. please leave a comment and tell me what you think or what else you'll like to see from me 💖 gif by @john-seed from this gifst WARNINGS: mentions of alcohol and getting drunk, space swearing. support my writing through ko-fi💖 MASTERLIST

Love is strange. Delicate yet fierce. So forceful that it manages to seep through the cracks created by bombs and gunfire of war. Unexpected at times, appearing out of nowhere. Yet, it’s beautiful because it brings those with beautiful hearts and minds together, entangled in the constant dance of intimacy and devotion.

It’s what Ireca and Mohash have.

Ireca was from the Logistic division, a mechanic herself and your colleague. She was to be married to her long-time lover, Mohash, a flight engineer for the Cobalt Squadron. As far as cliches go, wartime love falls along the lines of a romance cliche. Yet, war was all you’ve known. It’s what everyone has ever known. It’s common to develop some kind of a feeling other than the constant emotions during battle—fondness, the feeling of falling in love with someone. It’s truly what we stay alive for.

Maybe that’s why you hate it so much. The absence of the feeling that everyone describes as so fucking amazing that it completes you. You feel empty most of the time. It’s definitely the reason why you put all your effort into fixing things you can rather than complicated problems and issues that continue to reside in your mind, especially in the wake of midnight.

You find yourself sitting by the makeshift bar, tucked away from the crowd of friends and colleagues. There’s music playing, the sound of drums, and the seven-string hallikset reminds you of your brief visit to Naboo three cycles ago. You’re nursing a warm cup of something that tastes closer to acid water than alcohol.

Ireca emerges from the crowd with flowers in her braided hair. She approaches you with a bright smile and calls out your name wistfully. You shoot a strained smile her way, feeling the bags under your eyes weigh a little more. “What are you doing here all by yourself, huh?” she asks, leaning against the bar with a gentle pat on your shoulder.

“I’m just really tired. Last night was rough. Plus, I’m behind schedule.” you sighed heavily, running your fingers through your hair. She flashed you a smile of sympathy as you continued, “I’m sorry, Ireca. Don’t let me ruin your night. Go, have fun.”

She raises an eyebrow as you take another sip from your cup.

"Go. I'm sure you don't want to miss Mohash's special performance." You gesture to a drunk Mohash, who seemed to be searching for the woman. Ireca merely laughed. "Oh, it sure is going to be special." With a gentle touch to your back and wave, you watch her make her way into the swarm of bodies. You're left alone once again.

You’re still trying to figure out how Mohash even got hold of any sort of alcohol and managed to smuggle it into the base. Someone must have nicked it during one of the previous missions in the Mid Rim.

You rub your eyes, half-awake at this point; your cup is placed beside you as you rest your head against your folded arms on the table. Your mind is in a daze and incapable of irrational thought, deciding it would be best to just camp out here, by the makeshift bar, for the night. You were too tired to drag yourself all the way to your quarters, which felt like miles away, in the first place.

As sleep began to weigh heavy upon your eyelids, you suddenly felt a sharp tap on your shoulder. A soft groan escaped your lips as you shifted your head, still resting on your arms, just enough to peek at your sleep intruder.

It’s Poe Dameron. Commander and Black Leader. Incredibly talented, confident, and effortlessly handsome.

Ugh, you hate this guy.

Yet, you don’t feel so tired anymore.

“Are you drunk?” There’s amusement in his voice with a tinge of mockery. It made you realize the stun you were pulling. Classic Dameron. It was supposed to be a happy ceremony, but it was truly Ireca’s fault for manipulating you into coming tonight. Parties, events, and social gatherings were never right up your alley. You prefer spending time with machinery and your greasy hands.

Poe’s eyes are gleaming under the fluorescent lights, filled with concern, but you spot the smugness in his emerging smile. A flash of a thought, you kind of want to feel his lips on yours. The image immediately stings. You want to gag.

Poe is irritating, arrogant, and careless. Not charming. Nope, definitely not charming.

You straighten yourself, trying to shake off the burning image, shoving it to the back of your head. You lift your head, propping your elbow on the table and resting your chin on the heel of your hand. “You actually think I’ll even touch that bantha shit?”

Tearing your eyes away from Poe, you reach for your cup only to realize it was empty. He casts you a look. Your eyes shoot daggers with an extended pointer finger his way, “Don’t you dare say anything, flyboy.”

Poe raises his palms in defense, lips pursing. “Wasn’t going to.”

You catch a glimmer of mischief in his eyes, one hand discreetly reaching under his tawny leather jacket. Then, a bottle of Corellian whiskey emerges, shining under the lights of the Resistance hangar. Your face lights up at the recognition of the bottle, memories of your rare trips to Corellia, sharing whiskey drinks with your colleagues. It was the only planet you’d been to ever since you joined the Resistance.

You’ve only tasted Corellian whiskey once because of how expensive it is. You’ll happily get drunk to that in a heartbeat. Drink the worry and sorrow away with the lingering taste of frankly exorbitant whiskey.

Like a child with grabby hands, you reach for the bottle, but as your fingers brush his, Poe quickly lifts it to the air and away from you. He smacks your hand away. You whine, feeling a little lightheaded. The contents of the mysterious drink are starting to kick in.

What the blinkin' mradhe muck was in that drink?

“What do you want from me? It’s not like I have a drinking problem.”

He’s giving you that look like he’s judging you, but with a hint of amusement at the slight tug of the corner of his mouth. “You definitely have a drinking problem, but... i'll let you drink this on one condition.”

“For kriff’s sake,” you mutter, rolling your eyes, glancing away. “I’m not doing any weird wacky favors for you, Dameron.”

He scoffs, expression bewildered. “Hey, I don’t ask for weird wacky favors,” He articulates his words with a defensive tone, index finger stretched to your face. You simply smack it away as Poe clicks his tongue and continues to clarify his proposition. “All I’m asking is for you to fix my ship.”

Your wide-eyed gaze flies to him, shaking your head furiously. “Oh, no, no. No. Never in a million cycles. Never in a million millennials. Nuh-uh—”

“Hey, quit being dramatic. It’s a simple job.”

Your eyes grow even wider, voice raising. “A simple job? You fly that ship of yours like we have hundreds of spare ones. I’m not putting all my time and effort into fixing a lost cause.”

“But you haven’t even—”

“No. I’m not fixing your ship, and that’s final.”

Poe blinks and you’re back to fussing over your empty cup. The chatter of the crowd grows louder as a group of pilots of the Cobalt Squadron began rendering verses of an unknown traditional drinking song to your ears. You steal a look to only find Ireca and Mohash amidst a dance, tangled in each other's arms.

He eyes closely, noticing the turn of your lips, trained eyes deem melancholy. He knows the face of a loner very well—usually recruits with lost family and homes. They enlist in a mass community of freedom fighters for the restoration of good in the universe, and to finally feel a sense of familiarity and belonging. He doesn’t know much about you but he knows you don’t truly have anyone to depend on but yourself. It’s the reason why you’re constantly fierce.

Poe clears his throat, shifting closer to you as he watches the way you carry your gradual gaze to hold his. They then flit to the space between the two of you, raised eyebrows acknowledging the weird close proximity of his presence to yours.

“Look, you’re the best mechanic there ever was and probably ever will be. So, fix my ship, and you get to have this Corellian beauty. All of it.” He sways the bottle in the air, but you don’t look at it.

“You know, that’s bribery.”

“Yes, and it’s working.”

You scoff. “No, it isn’t.”

Poe laughs. “Yes, it is. I can see it in your eyes.”

Another scoff, you look fully aggravated. “How dense do you think I am?”

“Oh, very, but let’s not get into that.”

Bickering was the only language the two of you spoke fluently when you found yourselves tangled in a conversation with one another. Thrown insults were spoken lies—saying you hate each other when you know that isn’t true. Well, at least you don’t mean it and you hoped Poe didn’t either.

You’re exhausted, physically and mentally. For once, kindness and acceptance seem to be the easiest route.

A sigh passes your lips as you blink up to the ceiling, sending a silent prayer for blessings from the Maker above. “You’re right. I am dense. Truly dense. So, yeah. Okay. I’ll fix that stupid X-Wing of yours.”

Poe blinks, dumbfounded. “Wait, really?”

With a roll of your eyes, they meet his very own wide ones. “Yes, really. Only because you complimented me. Now, hand me that Corellian whiskey before I change my mind.”

He then makes a sound that resonates between a cough and a pleasantly surprised laugh, eyes crinkling with delight. Poe happily and absentmindedly passes the whiskey to you, still reacting like your agreement is some sort of object of ridicule in the best way possible.

“Wow—Maker, you have no idea what kind of trouble you’re saving me from. If the General ever found out—man, pfft. Thank you. Thank you so much—”

A swift and unexpected motion, he is reaching you, palms clasp and either side of your face, and plants a quick peck on the side of your left temple.

Poe isn’t thinking straight.

There you are, mid-swig, lips so close to the rim of the bottle with eyes so wide. You steal a steady glance at the pilot whose expression seems to reflect yours. His hands are still on your cheeks. He’s unbelievably close to you and he’s staring with that stupid look of his.

‘Maker, preserve me.’

A cheer erupts from the crowd from across the space and just like that, the moment is gone. Whatever the moment even was. His touch is no longer on yours and his gaze shifting away.

The tension, however, is still very present.

You finally take a swig of the whiskey, wanting to ease the sudden tightness in your chest. You hum at the stinging sensation on your tongue. You catch a glimpse of Poe from the corner of your eye who busies himself with tapping his fingers nervously against the surface of the bar.

Then, in an awkward motion, you stretch your arm to him, offering the drink.

A beat. His gaze shifts between you and your hand. When he finally gives in, a smile curves upon his lips, fingers brushing against yours. They’re delicate and you smile at him. It's small, but it makes his heart skip a beat and you wonder to yourself about the strangeness of love.

[obsidiansong]

While I’ll admit that Byleth lacking Azure Moon, Verdant Wind, or Silver Snow verses is partially based on my own biases, it also just wouldn’t make sense to me with the way I characterize Byleth for her to choose any other paths besides Obsidian Song or Crimson Flower. This lies almost exclusively in her first impressions of the three Lords, as well as Jeralt’s words.

With Dimitri, she figured out pretty quickly that he didn’t quite trust her completely, due to her perceived lack of guilt on the battlefield (which, unlike canon, is completely true to my Byleth, even if she hates the fact), and she immediately puts some distance between her and anyone she thinks sees her as inhuman due to past events. This probably caused her to take the longest to connect with Dimitri, but once she did, she found it remarkably easy to get along with him due to his earnest and forthright nature. However, her initial reluctance to head the Blue Lions also lies in the darkness she felt under Dimitri’s exterior, as indicated by the prologue - and frankly, at the time, as someone who had zero attachment to any of these young men and women, she didn’t feel equipped to deal with that nor did she particularly want to. Thus, she would never head Blue Lions, and thus, never head down the Azure Moon route.

With Claude, the ease with which he could fake smiles and how readily he admitted to being a scoundrel put her on guard. She could immediately tell that he was the type to use people for his own ends if need be underneath that happy-go-lucky exterior, and had a feeling that this could easily extend to those who technically held authority over him if he felt he could get away with it. And Byleth, while prodigious in a battle of strength and skill, couldn’t quite claim to excel as much when it came to wits and manipulation, so she was a bit wary when dealing with Claude, at first. Consistently scanning his words, his actions, even his body language, for any sort of hint of duplicity. It was obviously a mentality that wouldn’t lend itself well to the teacher of his house, and in doing so, never proceed down Verdant Wind.

However, Edelgard’s consistent analyses of Byleth during their early interactions actually helped endear Byleth to her more than it might others. Byleth has always been someone who hates what she is due to how difficult it made it for her to form genuine connections with others, and this gave her some hope that Edelgard might be able to more easily see her true self underneath the lack of expression and Ashen Demon reputation. It was hope that seemed to have borne some small fruit when the princess expressed that she thought Byleth and her might have similar personalities, when the soon-to-be professor was going around and talking to the students before she officially chose which house to teach. As such, when said choice came around, Byleth immediately felt the most comfortable heading up the Black Eagles, feeling like maybe, just maybe, she could build some true understanding with Edelgard - and by extension, the rest of the Black Eagles, an understanding that, at least in her mind, seems to develop over the course of the year.

And, of course, Silver Snow was axed from the get-go thanks to none other than Jeralt. Byleth’s father is the person that she trusts the most explicitly; when he warned her not to completely trust Rhea when they first arrived at Garreg Mach, Byleth took those words to heart and never fully learned to place her faith in the archbishop. As such, the confrontation in the Holy Tomb depends entirely on how much Byleth’s faith in Edelgard is shaken - if she feels too betrayed (by the means of her emotional and mental distress amplified by the problems inflicted upon her by her merge with Sothis), she flees and begins Obsidian Song. However, if her faith in Edelgard holds, usually because events proceeded as per canon, she instead continues down Crimson Flower. She never trusts Rhea more than she does Edelgard, and the events that shake her trust in Edelgard come with the caveat that she’s also been losing just as much, if not more, trust in Rhea over the past month or so.

In short, there’s actually more here to what goes behind Byleth’s lack of non-Obsidian Song/Crimson Flower verses beyond just “Awoo really loves Edelgard and doesn’t want Byleth to be forced to kill her” (although that’s at least a part of it, I won’t deny that), involving a lot of in-character reasons for why she’d only ever be the teacher of the Black Eagles.

[characteroulette]

okay okay okay okay

now that I’ve finished DGS1 and can think of nothing else, let me elabourate on what I’ve been ranting about to Verse and my sister (thanks for putting up with me hahaha)

(spoilers for all of DGS1 by the by we going HARD)

So the overarching theme of DGS1 is Trust. How it’s built up, who deserves it, how to extend your hand to those who may not deserve it, and how to build it back up when it’s been broken. Each case builds on this as Ryuunosuke goes on his journey and I think it’s handled really, really well

Case 1, Asougi teaches you the basics of Trust. He tells you that he will trust you and follow you until the end. Twice, right at the beginning of the trial, he tells you that your actions are betraying his trust, even though Ryuunosuke thinks he’s doing it to spare his friend the pain.

(like, seriously, Asougi pretty much says “How sad. You don’t trust that I actually believe in you.” and then “You would throw that trust right back in my face by just accepting a Guilty verdict, huh?” it’s really explicit) (which is probs the only reason why I noticed it hahaha)

But as the trial goes on, Asougi’s unwavering belief in Ryuunosuke helps our protag boy believe in himself. And he trusts Asougi easily due to their close friendship, but you see the shift from “there’s no way I’m gonna be able to prove my innocence” to “I can’t do anything except prove my innocence” as the trial goes on, just because Asougi never stops believing in Ryuunosuke.

And then Case 2 hits and you have to learn to trust others who might seem like enemies at first. This chapter’s mostly for Susato’s growth, because she starts off absolutely not trusting you, but as you hang out and investigate together she just naturally slots into your little sister role and, before she even realises it, she’s trusting Ryuunosuke and working hard to help him prove his innocence. She admits in the end that she should never have doubted you, but you can tell this experience made a deep impression on her, as her trust in Ryuunosuke never wavers and I think that’s beautiful. ;w;

Next is Hosonaga! An odd addition, but he places his trust in Ryuunosuke pretty immediately and easily, showing just how much of an impact Asougi and Ryuunosuke’s relationship made on him during Case 1. The fact that he places any trust in Ryuunosuke at all is enough to bolster Ryuunosuke’s resolve, since Ryuunosuke needed to not be so alone while grieving for his best friend’s death on top of having to prove his innocence. (The whole of DGS1 handles grief really well, I think also, but that’s another essay I’ll have to write.)

And then the disaster man himself, Sherlock. (/Herlock) He’s the reason why Ryuunosuke’s been arrested again and it’s very, very hard to trust this man. I think they did a really good job of making his personality abrasive enough to be just exasperating enough that you can’t take him seriously, but also for you to feel fondness towards his dumb ass. (The perfect AA balance, honestly.) Sherlock is a hard nut to crack, appearing as if he never truly suspected you of any wrongdoing to begin with (it’s his whimsical nature that does it), but you really get a sense of how easily he builds up a rapport with Ryuunosuke from their first whole conversation.

Once you engage in your first Dance of Deduction with Sherlock, that’s it. You’re his friend now. And he basically is just treating you as such from then on, no hesitations on letting you out of your shackles and mischievously putting you right back in them once you’ve finished. Sherlock has seen your character and trusts you, even if he won’t say so outright.

(That one line really hits me, where he basically admits that he was treating this as a game and not fully realising how deeply the whole event has hit Ryuunosuke and Susato. Asougi was their friend, and his admitting that all of his mischief and jokes weren’t ever quite appropriate, given the circumstances, is touching and the actual moment, I think, where Ryuunosuke starts placing his trust in Sherlock in return.)

Case 3 is the big one. Ryuunosuke is sent to defend a man whom he’s not even sure is innocent. The trial goes along and you, the player, can do nothing even if you know what’s really happening. All you can do is trust that Ryuunosuke can handle things and it’s a huge, HUGE step for them to take to have your client mislead you like this. And so successfully!

But the damage is done and Ryuunosuke’s trust in his resolve, his friend’s belief, is broken. Not shattered, thankfully, but broken enough to make Ryuunosuke hesitant to place his trust in anyone again.

Unfortunately, Case 4 comes barrelling out the gate and you’re called upon to place your trust in someone yet again. Ryuunosuke is clearly not ready for it, his narration makes it clear, but you as the player ask Ryuunosuke to trust in you. He goes along and investigates despite being unsure, which as Susato points out (I think it was Susato), he’d made his mind up long before actually taking on the case.

This is also! Where we get to see that, despite all the airs and pretences Barok van Zieks puts on, he’s willing to place more trust in Ryuunosuke than he rightly should. Once Ryuunosuke has the truth in his sights, Van Zieks allows him to continue on his fancies. Van Zieks willingly engages him in discussions and helps iron out all the logic along the way. And though Ryuunosuke doesn’t realise it fully himself, he also starts to trust Van Zieks in return, thinking of him not as an opponent so much as a colleague. Maybe even a friend.

(All I can say is that it’s 1-3 Edgeworth all over again and I LIVE for this shit owo)

Since the truth is secured, along with your client’s innocence, Ryuunosuke’s willingness to trust has been mended somewhat. So we next turn to our client of Case 5, who needs to learn the same lesson after similar events have broken her ability to trust. Gina makes for an interesting parallel to Ryuunosuke in this regard, since they experience a whole slew of terrible events that test their ability to trust. The difference is simply that Ryuunosuke was willing to have friends, to keep trusting others, whereas Gina refused to have friends or place any trust in others even though she desperately wanted to.

That conversation she, Susato, and Ryuunosuke have about it at her cell is really good. The one they have during their night together at Sherlock’s attic is great, too! Iris admitting that she does have her own doubts and Gina, through no benefit of her own, going to confirm on Iris’ behalf because maybe this Sherlock person could be trustworthy after all. Ryuunosuke admitting that he had doubts about Asougi’s trust in him, but as the trial progressed, finding that it was an unwavering belief that Asougi placed in him and how it stopped even being a question in his mind.

Because, to place your trust in someone else, you must first trust yourself.

(shit I forgot to mention) This is a big breaking point for Susato, too! Because she loses her trust in the Law after both Case 3 and Case 4. She’s seen what the London courts will do and realises that, if others are going to play dirty, then it might be better to engage right back. But her unwavering faith in Ryuunosuke helps her realise that what she’s done is wrong and, though her faith in the legal system has taken a big hit, she knows that Ryuunosuke won’t give up the fight. Ryuunosuke will do everything he can to help his clients and she believes in him whole-heartedly.

And Van Zieks sees this, too! He sees this fierce dragon before him, fighting even the government of Britain to protect his client, and thinks to himself, “This is exactly what our system has been needing.” And he joins in the fight! The police hold no authority in the courts; to Van Zieks, it is just him and Ryuunosuke, figuring out the whole truth, no matter how painful it may be.

And Ryuunosuke takes this trust with him all the way through, even getting his permission to participate in trials revoked in order to save Gina.

And that’s why Ryuunosuke is probably the greatest lawyer next to Apollo in the whole series thanks for coming to my essay talk

[tumbledfreckles]

Absorption

A Chem-verse Blackinnon Drabble, based off the events leading to James saying this in the pub: 

"Hi, Marlene, nice to see you again. With clothes on, too. Lovely."

You can read All About the Chemistry here

"I'm hungry." 

"Already? We only just finished." 

Marlene opened one eye to glare at Sirius across the pillows. From her half prone position, she didn't present the threatening figure she normally would, but she hoped the effect would carry. 

It didn't. 

"I wasn't talking about you," she clarified, when he only continued to wiggle his eyebrows in the wake of her stern look. "I'm actually hungry. For food." 

"Should have known. Of course I've left you satisfied in other hungers," Sirius caressed the thigh that draped over his hip. His touch lit a path of sensation that almost distracted her from the current goal. 

Almost. 

"Do you have any? Food that is," Marlene nudged her toe into his calf before he could make another joke. 

"Maybe," Sirius was quiet, stroking her hip as he thought. "Remus definitely had some biscuits that he bought only yesterday. Shouldn't have eaten them yet. I know he had chocolate too and that normally goes first." 

"Anything a bit more healthy?" 

"Jesus, you're fussy, woman," his hand on her breast made a mockery of his incensed tone. "Ummm, Peter bought some grapes, I think. Always trying to lose weight." 

"He won't miss them?" Marlene's back arched, pushing herself more into the pleasant touch. 

"Well, considering he ordered a pizza for dinner when he got home, I think not," Sirius' voice was muffled, his lips now pressed into the curve of her neck. 

"Sounds great," Marlene gasped, an involuntary reaction as the hand on her hip slid lower. "Can you go get them?" 

"I'm busy," he nipped at the soft skin behind her ear. "If you hadn't noticed." 

"You can continue once you've got me my nourishment," she encouraged, even as her hips bucked into her hand. "And it's not like you can continue if I'm not here." 

"True," he acknowledged, his hand reaching her centre. "But I can't do this, if I'm not here." 

"A great point," Marlene's body betrayed her, hunger for him taking over. She reached for him. "But later, you'll go." 

"Of course." 

But much later, when they were both satisfied once more, he refused. Of course he did. 

"You're the one who's hungry, still. Your more than satisfy me, love."

"Flattery will not get you of this. It's your place. You should go." 

"I'm exhausted by my efforts." 

"You are not, I know for a fact you could go another round in about five minutes." 

"What are you, a sex prophet?"

"Maybe. But more like, a woman experienced in the ways of Sirius Black." 

"And how lucky you are." 

"Even luckier once I get some food to go with the great sex he provides." 

"You know where the kitchen is." 

"Sirius," she made his name last several extra syllables as she whined. 

"Just go. You could have been there and back and eaten half the biscuits in this time." 

"I could also be eating them if you'd gone too."

"No one’s even here, it's not like you need to put clothes on."

"Chivalry is so dead right now." 

"I ain't no gentleman, McKinnon, you know that," the suck on her neck and the rough squeeze of her bottom added emphasis to his point. 

She wouldn't tell him how much it turned her on. 

Unfortunately, he knew her body well enough by now to tell, anyway. 

"Prat," she mumbled as he grinned wickedly. 

"As if it's not why you're here." 

God help her, why did she have to be attracted to the bad boys? 

Not that he was as bad as his leather jacket and dishevelled appearance made him look. Far from it, really. Marlene might have gone into this for the sex, but she hadn't missed how sweet and caring he could be too. 

Sometimes. 

Not now, apparently. 

"Fine," she huffed, making a big show of shoving him off her and getting off the bed. "But I'm not sharing." 

"Fair enough," he watched her head for the door, predatory gaze in his eyes to the last. "But I reserve the right to try and change your mind when you get back." 

Marlene rolled her eyes but couldn't help the smile that formed as she opened the door. She darted through it before he could see. 

Stepping lightly, but hearing no noise through the flat, she made her way to the kitchen. It didn't take long to locate the grapes in the fridge, but she had to hunt through various cupboards to find Remus' stash. 

"Biscuits, biscuits," she muttered to herself, moving blocks of chocolate and bags of pasta. "Where the fuck does he keep them?" 

"Right at the back, to try stop us taking them." 

"Thanks," Marlene reached up on her toes and located a family sized packet of tim tams before she froze. 

The voice behind her wasn't Sirius's. 

She fell back, landing heavily on her heels. Turning slowly, using the chocolate bickies to cover her chest, she faced the speaker. 

James lay on the couch, phone held above him in one hand, the other balancing a glass of juice. His face was turned away from her, focused on his screen. 

"How long have you been there?" Marlene asked, glad of the kitchen island between them, hiding her pantless state. 

"Came home during your last round, I think," he still didn't look at her, and she was glad, as her cheeks flamed with heat. "Hi Marlene." 

"Hullo James," she went to gesture at her biscuits but realised she probably shouldn't move. "I, uh, got hungry."

"Sounded like you two were working up quite the appetite," he nodded blandly, as if they were discussing the weather. "Don't let me keep you." 

"Oh, er, right," she held the grapes in front of her, and made sure the biscuits were adequately in front of her chest. They didn't cover much, but at least her nipples weren't on display. "I'll just, uh, get back then." 

She sidestepped her way to the door leading to the passage. A slow process given she had to keep everything covered and check that James wasn't looking. He didn't so much as blink in her direction, and she consoled herself that he'd probably only seen her bum through the whole affair. 

That was okay. She had quite a good bum. 

"Hey Marlene," James said casually  when she was almost into the passage. 

"Yeah?"

"Next time make Sirius get the snacks. Those grapes might actually cover him." 

She didn't even check if he was still looking at his phone, just turned and fled the scene. Sirius jumped in fright as she flung his bedroom door back open and threw the biscuits at him. 

"You absolute jerk," she gave him a shove as she landed on the bed, pulling the duvet around her waist.  

"What happened?" He asked, packet already open on his lap, tim tam half crunched. 

"James was home. He bloody saw him rooting through your cupboards starkers," she pulled the bickie from his hand. "Oi, these are mine." 

"Huh. Sorry. That must have been the door I heard earlier," Sirius didn't bother with the pack of biscuits again, swiping some grapes instead. 

"You could have mentioned that." 

"But then you wouldn't have got the food. And I was so hungry," his puppy dog eyes were so ridiculously out of place on his face that Marlene felt herself softening despite her annoyance. And her embarrassment. It was a definite hearty mix of both. 

"You absolute jerk," she pulled the food out of his reach, shuffling across the bed for her own private party. "That's even worse." 

Sirius growled softly at the loss of both his food and Marlene. The mattress dipped as he crawled across it, moving behind her. "What about if I make up to you?" 

"I'm listening," she continued to savour the chocolate that melted off the biscuit in her mouth. 

Instead of words of apology, pleads of forgiveness, instead lips pressed against her shoulder. Breath whispered along her neck. Goosebumps erupted of her skin, following the trail of his long, fingers. 

"I'll get the food next time," he promised, tugging at her earlobe until she leant back into him. 

"You better," Marlene muttered, not quite ready to let him off the hook. "Poor James, he'll be traumatised." 

"Jealous, more like," Sirius snickered as he reclaimed his hold on her breast. "With this thing between him and your mate, it's probably the most action he's had in weeks." 

"True," Marlene extended her neck to land a kiss on his jaw, the rough stubble scratching at her lips. "Lucky we don't have that problem." 

"Very lucky," Sirius agreed, using the angle to claim her lips. "Very lucky indeed."

[foursideharmony]

Okay, so remember this post I made a few months ago about how I think the Mindscape “works” in terms of structure? I thought I should also share some of my headcanons about how the Sides themselves work.

(Note: I prefer to capitalize Side because it’s a fairly common word on its own, and this distinguishes the characters we love so much from other uses which are likely to crop up.)

Question #1: Do they need to eat, sleep, etc.? You know what? I think they do. Your brain functions need energy and downtime in order to keep operating at peak efficiency, and that translates, in the Mindscape, into actual food and sleep.

It can be entirely literal—the food that Thomas eats becomes stored caloric energy, and that manifests in the Mindscape as the stuff available in the Sides’ fridge and pantry. What they have available reflects the kind of stuff he’s been eating lately, so they try to influence his eating habits in accordance with their tastes. Logan wants perfect nutritional balance, Patton’s into comfort food, Roman wants to experiment with flavors and try gourmet and exotic cuisine, etc.

As for sleep/rest, I think they need differing amounts, which may or may not correspond to Thomas’s own sleep schedule. Logan sleeps when Thomas does, almost by definition. Virgil has to drift off before Thomas can sleep…but he is the lightest sleeper of the lot, and might well wake up in the middle of the night and start poking Thomas’s dreams. Roman and Patton can both remain active all night, on and off, but balance it by being the most likely to need naps during the day. (Ever had a night of intense dreams that leave you with subdued emotional affect the next day? That happens to Thomas too...it means Patton stayed up way too late and is sleeping in.) Janus and Remus have, I think, unpredictable sleep patterns, and are especially prone to timing their bouts of activity for when at least three other Sides are asleep, so Thomas is caught off-guard.

Question #2: Can they be hurt? Well, the answer to this one is an unambiguous YES, as proven in several episodes, so let’s tweak it: How can they be hurt, and how do they recover from being hurt? Yeah, that’s much more fun to speculate about!

Not only can the Sides be injured, but the show gives us two ways it can happen. The simpler one is, they can hurt each other, just like real people can hurt each other. We have several instances in the series of Sides throwing things at each other and causing pain or injury as a result. I extend that to mean that they can also be injured within the Mindscape via household accidents, misadventure in the Imagination, etc. That’s their “world,” and it can affect them just as the physical world affects physical people.

The other way they can be hurt, of course, is if something happens in Thomas’s life that negatively impacts his self-image vis-à-vis their function. We saw this happen in “My NEGATIVE Thinking” when Roman, as Thomas’s ego, was “bruised” by his fumble at the audition. It’s easy to imagine situations where this happens to other Sides. Thomas’s feelings might be hurt, which means Patton takes a hit. Or he might have his intelligence called into question, which could damage Logan. Fortunately, they apparently heal this damage as soon as Thomas gets over whichever crisis caused it. This leads me to my major thesis statement about their faux-physicality:

The Sides’ “physical” condition is largely determined by their expectations.

The Sides aren’t precisely human. They are, however, aspects of a human, which means they have human experiences of the world, human reactions to events, and human expectations regarding their environment. Thomas knows that when a wadded-up piece of paper hits your eye, it hurts, and so Roman knows it too, and so when a wadded-up piece of paper hits his eye, it hurts. It’s actually the same mechanism by which Thomas flubbing his audition causes Roman to become bruised. The audition goof changes Roman’s opinion of himself from “amazing actor” to “terrible actor,” and since Thomas’s acting ability is a major part of his function, that damages him. Being hit in the eye with a wadded-up piece of paper changes his self-image from “person who is totally fine” to “person who has just been hit in the eye with a wadded-up piece of paper,” and because he knows it’s supposed to hurt, that damages him. Not much, since being hit in the eye with a wadded-up piece of paper only hurts a little, and briefly, but that’s the process.

And that’s why Logan is able to shake off Remus’s violent attacks in “Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts.” As Logic, Logan is able to maintain the presence of mind to remember that they are not actually physically real, and therefore the attacks aren’t actually happening to anyone. He still reels when Remus hurls a shuriken into his forehead, because that’s a reflexive reaction, but he is braced for it; it does not affect his self-image enough to do any lasting damage. Perhaps the other Sides could also “roll to disbelieve” in this fashion, but it would likely be much harder for them, because they are not cold hard Logic.

If an injury does stick, expectations also govern how fast they recover. Fortunately for the Sides, it’s not as straightforward as the process of getting hurt in the first place. Although they know, like Thomas does, how long many types of injuries take to heal, for them it can go much faster because of the self-image thing. Say Patton trips going down the stairs. He breaks his arm because the fall changes his self-image to “person who just fell down the stairs OOOOOWWWWWW,” and he remains that way for a time. But with proper care, he soon starts to feel better, his self-image changes again to “person who is getting better,” and this accelerates his healing process.

All the whumpy goodness a fan writer could want, without the hassle of long-term impairment or permanent damage.

Question #3: Can they…you know…bite the big one?

I honestly haven’t given this one as much thought as the other questions…or as much thought as some other fans have. Here are the possibilities I’ve seen explored:

No. No matter how much damage a Side takes, he can’t actually die. Chop off his head, and he walks around carrying it. It probably looks annoyed.

Yes, but not permanently. They come back after a while. The exact length of the while depends on the writer, and sometimes varies by method of death. In some cases, they spring back to life, while in others, the “body” disappears and reforms later in some designated part of the Mindscape. They might lose some memories in the process or otherwise be altered slightly.

Yes, and it’s awful. Eventually a new personification will form in order to be that Side of Thomas’s personality, but the original is gone forever and we will all miss him terribly.

Yes, and it’s devastating for Thomas, who outright loses that facet of himself for the rest of his life. AND we miss the dead Side terribly.

I tend to lean toward the first two answers myself. It seems to me that the only way to outright erase part of someone’s personality is for the person to willingly and deliberately undergo intensive therapy to that specific end, and even then, I think it would result in the Side transforming into something very different, rather than going away forever. And it would be a slow enough process that the transformation itself would seem like a natural evolution rather than a replacement of one character with another.

But ultimately? I don’t know. More to the point, in my headcanon-verse, neither do the Sides. It makes for better drama if they have no idea how mortal they are and don’t dare to find out.

Wow, this went on longer than I expected. I hope you all enjoyed it!

[cycat4077]

Reunited

Summary: You reconnect with an old college friend only to find that your past comes back to haunt you. Set during summer 2016 (S17). Pairing: Sonny x Reader Warnings: Mild cussing, some angst, some feelings and dialogue (sorry) Words: 3247 AO3 here

Part 8 of the Changes verse. Masterlist here if you're interested :) (Could probably read as a stand alone fic if you’re not into series.)

A/N: I really wanted to give my main character a friend and ‘Sydney’ popped into my brain. Also, do y'all remember back in 2015 when Sonny said he had an ex at the LAPD? Yeah, me too. So I took the liberty of using it :P Sorry this fic is kind of meh (On a separate note, the pic doesn’t necessarily mean the reader is blonde. I just thought a Sonny hug would be fitting!)

"Sydney?" you question, walking slowly up to the blonde who stands collecting her order at the campus coffee shop.

Immediately she spins on her heels and her face lights up with recognition. "Oh my goodness!" she exclaims, raising her arms to embrace you.

You and Sydney had graduated together from the master’s of education program; she, with a background in English lit and you, in biology. Despite being from different disciplines, you often worked on projects together and used your contrasting perspectives to bounce ideas between brains. As a result, Sydney became a close friend. But, as too often happens when people part ways, life whizzed by quicker than the two of you could stay in touch.

Now however, as you set foot on your new campus for a summer orientation workshop, you are thrilled to see a friendly and familiar face.

"What are you doin’ here, girl?!" she asks with the same enthusiastic energy you remember her for.

"New job!" you reply cheerfully.

"Ahh! That's awesome!" she squeals. "It'll be like old times! I've been in the English department for a few years now and I just love it."

You smile fondly. "I always knew you'd move back here.”

"Yup! You can take the girl outta the city…and all that stuff,” Sydney sweeps her silky locks behind her ear, “but I am surprised to see ‘little miss rural’ out this way!"

You raise your hands and shrug. "Me too! Though, opportunity knocked and I couldn't turn it down. Actually, this is my second teaching gig in Manhattan. I won't name names, but I got booted from my last one when a prof crawled out of retirement." You frown towards the ground, the wound still fresh.

"Bastards," Sydney mumbles under her breath. "That musta been rough, but I'm glad you're on the rebound." She offers you a hopeful smile. "You liking NYC then, since you ended up sticking around?" "It's alright. Different,” you admit. “I just moved in with my boyfriend though and he's slowly but surely converting me."

Sydney lets out another delighted squeal. During your college days she was always trying to get you to date. You told her about your past and she swore to avenge you. Unfortunately, her best efforts involved dragging you to parties and other social events where ultimately you ended up preventing her from making the bad decisions. Still, she cared about you and her genuine excitement over your relationship success makes you realize just how much you had missed her.

"I'm so happy for you! Is he cute? Is he smart? Does he work on campus?" She stretches her neck to look behind you as if Sonny is tucked away nearby.

You chuckle. "Nuh-no. He's an SVU detective. That's how we met actually." Her face falls with worry and you quickly elaborate. "I took a summer job there last year and we just clicked. He's really great." You smile proudly, stopping yourself from bragging Sonny too much.

"Aw, hon, I'm so excited for you!"

"Thanks! Hey, are you still with Geoff?"

"Hell no!" she fires quickly. "Caught that ess-oh-bee sneaking around behind my back so I kicked his ass to the curb. But it’s fine. I'm enjoying the single life and New York has just what I need!"

You smile. Same old Sydney. "Well, I'm glad you're all right and I'm thrilled we're here together! We have a lot of catching up to do! In fact, you should come by our place sometime."

"Absolutely! I'd love that!” she grins enthusiastically. “And that means I'd get to meet the man who swooped my shy science-nerdette off her feet!"

A blush creeps over your cheeks. "Did I mention he's an amazing cook?"

Sydney covers her heart like she's been shot. "You did now! So, I'll be holding you to a meal, you here me?" She glares playfully at you as she backs up towards the door.

You laugh and wave her goodbye. Sydney turns into her smiling self as she spins around and leaves.

-x-

"Wheh!" huffs the blonde standing in the doorway to your apartment. She’s just gotten her first glance at Dominick "Sonny" Carisi, Jr. "Ya didn't tell me he was such a looker!”

You swat her arm playfully. "Down girl."

"Hey there," smiles Sonny as he lumbers towards the front door. He's dressed himself in a pressed shirt and slacks for the occasion and he looks absolutely gorgeous. "I'm Sonny, nice ta meet ya," he continues, extending a hand in greeting.

"Ooh, Staten Island," she remarks, accepting his gesture. "Nice to meet ya too. I'm Sydney."

Sonny chuckles and points out her accuracy with a raised finger. "That Brooklyn I hear?" he counters.

"Sure is!" Sydney releases a laugh that’s as smooth and as charming as she is.

"Come on in," Sonny gestures towards your cozy little apartment. She steps forward, making herself at home just as she would always do when the two of you would visit somewhere new.

The evening transpires with a lovely dinner followed by story swapping, playing catch-up and allowing Sonny and Sydney to get acquainted. As the evening wears on however, an uneasy feeling settles in your stomach.

Of course, it's wonderful to have Sydney back in your life – she’s one of the few people with whom you had allowed yourself to really open up. But as you listen to her and Sonny talk about growing up in the Boroughs, it's hard not to feel just a little out of place. There's so much you don't understand. So much that you don’t share in common with them. The best you can do is smile and nod along as the conversation flows.

Sydney is an extrovert through and through. She converses with others easily and can win them over with her natural charisma. Sonny too has the gift of the gab, and the pair seem to be hitting it off really well.

By now you’ve lost track of what they’re saying, instead listening to your inner voice. It's selfish and petty to be feeling this way, but there's a small part of you that is sad...jealous, you suppose. Maybe Sonny would prefer to have someone who knows what it’s like to grow up in the city surrounded by a bunch of siblings. Someone who is talkative and charming instead of quiet and shy. Not only that, but Sydney is gorgeous, with her luscious blonde hair and winsome smile. She always draws the eye of every person in a room. You don’t resent her for it by any means, it's just that you’ve never been in a relationship when she was around and so you’ve never had to worry about a significant other falling for her.

Were you that insecure about yourself that you could feel this way? That you had to worry your boyfriend, your Sonny, would be swept off his feet? It wasn't fair to either of them. Sydney has always been kind to you and you hate feeling any jealousy towards her. But worst of all, it’s not fair to Sonny. You know he loves you. He doesn't care that you’re not a supermodel and he is genuine when he tells you that you're beautiful. He loves you for who you are…No other guy has ever done that before. And that's why you're so torn up right now. You shouldn't be feeling jealous or worried, yet you are and it makes your stomach churn!

"Doll?" a soft voice startles you from your thoughts.

"Hmm?" you respond, trying to act casual.

Sydney jumps in. "We’re comparing notes on the best hidden gem restaurants around the city and Sonny says you love a little Italian spot in Tribeca.”

"Oh yeah,” you mutter. “Great alfredo."

Sonny’s brow knits, clearly sensing something is off. His blue eyes narrow and lips purse. "It's a bit pricey," he states, putting an arm around you. The action knocks you off balance as he draws you to him. "But I like ta spoil my girl from time ta time." Sonny unleashes one of his signature smiles, squeezing you ever so slightly in hopes of easing whatever seems to be on your mind.

"Aww, you two!" coos Sydney affectionately.

-x-

It's late evening by the time Sydney is thanking you for dinner and heading home. You and Sonny work in silence tidying up after your guest. And in that silence, your mind once again resorts to fabricating nagging thoughts of Sydney and Sonny. Moments are replayed with emphasis on how naturally they seemed to get along. But it’s that same silence which causes Sonny to speak up.

"What's wrong, doll?" he asks, pausing to lean up against the counter.

"Huh?" you reply with confusion.

"Somethin's up. I can tell. You were kinda distant earlier too." It’s not a question; he knows you too well.

"Nothing," you lie, trying to refocus on wiping down the table. How can you admit any of this to him?

"Tell me. Please," he begs, bending his head down to try and meet your gaze.

"I don't know,” you wring the dishtowel in your hands, “it's just…I kind of felt out of the loop sometimes tonight."

"Whaddya mean?" his eyebrows shoot up with concern.

"Well, you and Sydney hit it off so well..." Your voice trails off for a moment before you finally meet Sonny’s blue eyes. "Sydney's beautiful and charming and easy to get along with.”

“And you're not?”

The bluntness of his question hits you like a ton of bricks. “But…but she's from here,” you argue, tears starting to prickle at your eyes. “That's one thing I'll never have in common with you!”

Sonny stares at you in utter disbelief. “Doll,” his voice drops down to a soft note, “that means nothin’. I love that you're from outta town. You're more naive to the city ‘n I can see that there's still things about New York that excites ya. The lights on Broadway or the view of Lady Liberty in the harbor. Your pretty eyes absolutely light up! It’s so easy to get lost in the hustle ‘n bustle, but you remind me to stop ‘n appreciate all the little things too.”

Sonny’s now standing directly in front of you. He grabs your hands in his. “And don't even get me started about havin’ things in common.” A cheerful smile forms on his lips and his eyes crinkle at the corners. “You ‘n I share odd tastes in movies ‘n we're both suckas for nostalgia when it comes ta music. But that's just the tip of the iceberg! The most important thing we share is our values. Family is priority numba one, ‘n you have no idea how long I've waited to meet someone who believes that too. It…it hurts me knowin' that you would ever doubt my love for ya.”

Those words cause you to fall apart and the tears you’ve been holding back trickle down your cheek. You cram your eyes shut, heart aching over the thought of making Sonny feel any pain. At the same time however, he also deserves to know why you still have your doubts.

You open your eyes to a warm hand caressing your cheek. It’s a gentle nudge to have you look at him. You find Sonny searching your features, so you interlace your fingers with his and gently tug him towards the sofa.

Sitting down beside you, Sonny gathers your legs to place atop of his. The closeness makes you feel safe as you mentally prepare yourself to tell all. You take a deep breath and glance up to a loving, encouraging smile pasted across on your boyfriend's features. “Sometimes I get worried that I’ll scare you off,” you tell him.

Immediately he interjects, rubbing your knee soothingly. “That’s nonsense, doll.”

“I know,” you say half-heartedly, “but it’s more to do with my own self-doubt.” Sonny’s expression saddens and he reaches out for your hand. You take it, linking your pinky with his. “Back when I was a biology student, there was this guy taking the same classes as me. He was a year or two older and we got along really well. We shared a lot of common interests. You know, movies and sports and all that stuff. It led us to spend a lot of time together during our free periods. He started doing these little things that seemed so affectionate. For instance, trying to sit tight beside me or asking to hold my hand. He paid me all kinds of compliments and even told me I was beautiful. Needless to say, I fell for him hard.” You pause, fiddling with Sonny’s finger. You had forgotten how much this all hurt to talk about.

Rubbing a hand across your forehead you continue. “One day, I worked up the courage to ask him out. But that’s when things spiraled downhill. He got really defensive and flat out said that he didn’t feel anything for me. That all the little things which I thought meant flirting were actually meaningless and, that I was crazy for thinking otherwise. To add insult to injury, he also said I was too young for him.” Sonny’s shoulders drop and he squeezes your hand a little tighter. “All I could manage was a lame ‘okay’ and left. I cried for weeks and it really threw me through a loop. I’ve been insecure about my feelings ever since. I felt humiliated and embarrassed for being fooled by his charms and for allowing myself to love him. So, I just buckled down and focused on my education, never really trusting myself to openly fall in love again. I was scared of making the same mistake – that is, until I met you.”

With your soul bared, Sonny swiftly pulls you into a hug. He holds you tight, warmth surrounding you as if he hoped it would melt away your pain. You press your face into the crook of his neck, giving him a soft kiss.

Sonny leans back, trailing his hands down your arms. “None of that was your fault, sweetheart,” he reassures. “That guy was a prick who needed ta lead ya on ta make himself feel important. Guys like that enjoy havin’ a girl’s affection, but the moment ya had the balls to tell him how ya felt he was too insecure ‘n pushed ya away. But y’know what?” he pats your arms lightly. “That’s his loss because ya have the biggest heart of any person I’ve ever met. N’ I’m lucky to be the one who gets ta be on the receiving end.”

His compliment makes you smile sheepishly. “Thank you, Sonny.” You truly love this man with all your heart. “I’ve tried not to let it affect me – affect us – but it’s one of those things that festers in the back of your mind.”

“I know,” he agrees. “It’s normal.” You watch as he looks away for a moment and swallows thickly. “I neva told ya this before, but I went through somethin’ like that myself…”

With Sonny being a chatterbox and sometimes oversharing information, it comes as a surprise that he too is guarding a part of himself. You flash him a reassuring smile, once again linking your fingers as a silent offer of your support.

And so, he begins. “I spent a year in California when I got out of the academy. There was this rotation at the LAPD ‘n I was young ‘n thought it would be really cool to get outta New York. Turns out I immediately fell head over heels for one of their young detectives. One bat of her eyelashes ‘n I was a goner. We ended up askin’ each other out ‘n life seemed great. Fancy dinners ‘n presents I couldn’t really afford. But at the time, it all seemed worth it because we were happy.” Sonny turns shy as he speaks and you feel a twinge in your gut. It had never occurred to you that he had been in love before you came along.

He looks up to the ceiling as if he dreaded the next lines of his story. “Then my contract was up. I thought we were a strong enough couple to stick together, so I asked her to be move back to New York with me. I said that we could be closer to my family ‘n that they were dyin’ to meet ‘er. But…we didn’t see eye to eye on that.” Sonny releases a sigh. “Yeah, she told me that she moved to LA to get away from family n’ that she loved it too much out there to up and leave. I was dumb ‘n in love ‘n I just didn’t get it. I offered to stay with her instead but she gave me the ol' speech: Yourra nice guy, Sonny, but we have different paces to life. It would never work out.”

You whisper his name, heart shattering on his behalf. He looks to you with a furrowed brow and continues. “I gave her my whole heart ‘n she wasn’t even willin’ to make an effort to keep us togetha. I don’t like to admit it very often, but I was a mess. I flew back to New York ‘n not long after joined law school. Then I ended up bouncin’ around the Boroughs until I met you.” Sonny’s face warms. His eyes sparkle and he unleashes a smile. “Now the whole world seems right! We can be ourselves around each other. I know I have my flaws, but you’d never judge me for ‘em. Instead, ya love ‘em too ‘n I hope ya know that it’s a two-way street from me.”

Now it’s your turn to smile. You remove your legs from him to cuddle under his arm. Sonny wraps around you and kisses the top of your head. “I love you, Sonny,” you mouth into his chest.

“Love ya too, sweetheart.”

You lean back to caress his cheek with your palm. “I think we have another thing in common,” you offer and Sonny peers at you inquisitively. “We fall in love easily.”

Sonny chuckles. “Yeah, it’s like you’re divin’ into tha deep end head first, but ya only find out it’s too shallow once you’re already leapin’.”

You nod your head in agreement. “It’s funny how that stuff always lingers with you. Like a scar that keeps scabbing over. When you jump off the swings as a kid and scrape your knee, you’ll see that scar afterwards and your brain reminds you to never do that again! It’s a shame that the same thing happens when your heart gets hurt. I always felt like I was scared to put myself out there over the fear of being heartbroken again.”

Sonny hums understandingly. “But,” he says, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, “when the right person comes along, all that hurt disappears. Because this time,” he smiles affectionately, “when you jump off the swing, there’ll be someone there to catch you.”

Your serious faces contort into goofy smiles. “See? What did I tell ya, doll? We’re so alike that we even share a knack for makin’ up dumb analogies.” Sonny’s eyes once again crinkle at the corners and he shifts to kiss your temple.

Leaning into his touch, you close your eyes and savor the moment. It feels good to clear the air like this and to be able to forge a connection that’s just that much deeper.

---

Hope you enjoyed! Let me know if you’re interested in being part of a tag-list. Any and all feedback is loved :)

Part 9, “Stuck-On Cheese” is up here

[morethanaprincess-a]

As they’ve started to become relevant in a few verses and threads, I wanted to write a little bit about some of Sonia’s extended family. Thus, here is some information about His Royal Highness Prince Arthur, Duke of Neuchatel (King Alexandre’s brother and only sibling, and Sonia’s uncle) and his family.

Note: Each member of this family is referred to as “His/Her Royal Highness” or “Your Highness,” despite Arthur and Olivia being the Duke and Duchess of Neuchatel. Because they are the sole Royal Duke and Duchess (with their titles granted to them upon marriage by the former King), they are addressed as Royal Highnesses as opposed to “Your Grace,” which is how other Dukes and Duchesses within Novoselic would be spoken of and to, if a servant or commoner is addressing them (at parties, or among those in the aristocracy, they are referred to as ‘Duke’ or ‘Duchess.’ No, it makes little sense and yes, it’s a lot to learn if your muse ends up working for/with Sonia in the Royal Family or your muse plans to marry her).

Everything is under the cut, as it’s pretty long!

His Royal Highness, the Duke of Neuchatel - Also known as Arthur, Duke of Neuchatel or informally as Arthur Nevermind (his last name, like his brother King Alexandre and his niece Princess Sonia, comes from their Royal House), he is King Alexandre’s only sibling. Born two years after his brother, Arthur proved himself to be charming and charismatic at a young age. Where Alexandre was thoughtful, introspective, and considerate, Arthur was bold and captivating. He loves a healthy competition no matter where it’s found, but he still grumbles that his brother still bests him in chess. His hobbies included shooting, skiing, and, to his mother’s dismay, gambling.

Despite being ‘the spare,’ Arthur relishes in being in charge, delivering orders and having his plans executed perfectly. It made him an ideal football captain in school as well as a member of the In Utero Student Council during his final two years of high school (he chose which events he wished to engage with. They were few and far-between). He consistently received the fastest training times throughout his military training, from obstacle courses to rope climbs to assembling firearms to driving tanks. His eagerness to guide others to victory made him an asset in the Novoselic Royal Army, where he completed his obligatory two years. He married Lady Olivia, daughter of the Duke of Vaud, two years after the Royal Wedding of-then Prince Alexandre, heir to the throne, and Lady Valentina, daughter of the Duke of Ticino.

Now, he is a full-time working royal for the Novoselic Royal Family with charitable interests in war veterans and science/technology. He’s an avid fan of the national football team, luxury fashion, wine, and his collection of rare watches and sportscars. He attends every Monaco Grand Prix and keeps a yacht on the French Riviera (which, on occasion, he’ll invite his wife along. This is not a frequent occurrence). 

Before Sonia comes of age and graduates university, he is the one fulfilling many of King Alexandre’s international obligations, so he is often away from home. He prefers to travel in style (or rather, he prefers to have his entire life to be lived ‘in style.’).

Her Royal Highness, the Duchess of Neuchatel - Also known as Olivia, Duchess of Neuchatel or informally as Olivia Nevermind, is the wife of the Duke of Neuchatel and Sonia’s aunt. A bit shorter and fuller in the bust than her sister-in-law Queen Valentina, Olivia could be best described as ‘meek and mousy.’ While the King and Duke have golden hair and blue eyes, and the Queen with her platinum hair and green eyes, Olivia still retains the expected (if not requisite) blonde hair of the Royal Family, though hers is a mix of dirty and ash blonde. She has round brown eyes that can make her look permanently surprised if she’s not in control of her emotions.

Olivia is a gentle, soft-spoken woman whom, since birth, has been raised to take her place in Novoselic’s aristocracy. As a child, she loved embroidery, piano, and ballet, but was forced to give up the sport after her teachers insisted she was ‘too chubby’ to continue. From then on, she took up tennis and gardening as hobbies, with the latter carrying on well into her adult life. After marrying Prince Arthur and becoming the Duchess of Neuchatel, Olivia’s interests are, first and foremost, their two children and raising them to be the future Duke of Neuchatel and members of the Novoselic aristocracy.

She spends far more time at home than her husband, though she participates in every official engagement and function the Royal Family asks of her. She is a popular choice to be featured in documentaries and interviews, such as recorded tours around various Royal estates. Her philanthropic efforts are focused mainly around agriculture, animal conservation, horticulture, and children’s charities, and when she becomes of age, Princess Sonia and her aunt often share the duties for animal conservatory and children’s charity efforts.

While she does eat meat, she eats very little of it and tends to choose more fish and plant-based meals. She supports organic farming and hydroponics, and is the host of the annual Novosonian flower show. When she is able to go and invited, she loves to attend Wimbledon.

His Royal Highness, Prince Liam of Neuchatel - Also known as Liam, Prince of Neuchatel or Liam Nevermind, he is Sonia’s eldest cousin on her father’s side and four years younger than she is. A bit taller than his cousin and far more muscular (if not stocky), Liam is brash, loud, and generally unafraid to speak his mind in most matters. If there’s quips being slung in the Royal Family, he’s one of three possible suspects (the others are Queen Valentina and Prince Arthur).

Liam likes to be active and to have a good time, or a good laugh. During Princess Sonia’s first year attending the annual Masquerade Ball, he and some school friends from In Utero Primary School let loose a flock of makango into the ballroom, causing a great uproar when the animals took a dip in the champagne and chocolate fountains and scurried up skirts and trouser legs. Since then, Queen Valentina tends to frown whenever he’s discussed.

He’s not the biggest fan of school, though he has some talent for mathematics and statistics. Languages, literature, and history tend to put him to sleep. What he does like is physical fitness and sports, and won’t hesitate to try most athletics (ballroom dancing, and most types of dancing, are exempt. He hates these). He is primarily a polo and rugby player, but he enjoys football as well and likes to watch boxing and racing. Like his father, he enjoys being part of a sports team, though not necessarily leading it.

Upon graduation, he elects to attend university (or rather, his father tells him he’ll be going) and fulfill his obligatory military service during the school holidays (mostly so he doesn’t become mixed up in his usual partying crowd). While he wanted to be properly deployed, most of his military responsibilities involve defense, particularly at the Novoselic border. He’s frustrated by this and finds it difficult to focus, so during his holidays he’s often found in Spain or Greece, wherever the it-crowd has designated the coolest spot to see and be seen. And like his father, he quite likes luxury goods, expensive liquor, and sports cars. He’s also known to be quite handsome, with his mother’s ash blonde hair and his father’s blue eyes (otherwise known as the ‘Nevermind Blue.’ Sonia’s father, uncle, and Sonia herself all have them, as well as Liam). 

Generally, if anyone’s going to appear in the tabloids, it’s usually Liam, and the Royal Family’s PR team has quite a job making sure anything incriminating never sees the light of day (or the light of a screen). His parents wish he’d settle down and actually have a real, meaningful relationship (that looks good in the eyes of the press and the people), but there’s no one special in his life. His charitable interests involve fitness and sports organizations, and he’s present at as many matches as he can. He loves when he’s sent to the Olympic Games to represent his country in the audience and in interviews.

His Royal Highness, Prince Samuel of Neuchatel - Also known as Samuel, Prince of Neuchatel or Samuel Nevermind, is the brother of Liam and Sonia’s cousin. He is two years younger than his brother and six years younger than Sonia. Where Liam is muscular, Samuel is not: however, he’s a good four inches taller than his brother, with long, golden hair (which he usually keeps tied back) and brown eyes (his mother’s). Samuel was one of the earliest targets of Liam’s jokes and jabs, and therefore he’s a bit quieter and considerate when it comes to his comments. Thoughtful and polite, he’s the ‘spare’ of the family and his parents worried he would grow up with a very thin skin. He didn’t take to athletics or military training nearly as easily as his brother Liam (though he took to video games: they bond over Mario Kart and Smash. It was a harrowing moment in Liam’s life the first time Samuel beat him at both). 

Samuel is also an excellent student: history and art are his favorite subjects, though he gets exemplary grades in everything at In Utero. His hobbies and passions include visual art (he likes to sketch and paint) and playing the violin, and during the summer months he enjoys fishing. He’s very well-read and enjoys attending theatrical and musical productions as part of the Royal Family. Several of his drawings have been framed by his mother or King Alexandre and displayed in various Royal homes. He’d love to have something hung (besides a portrait of himself) in the National Gallery one day.

Upon graduation, he both chooses to attend University (seriously, he couldn’t get there fast enough) and to serve in the armed forces by joining the Novoselic Royal Air Force. Thus, he learned to both drive a tank and fly a plane before he could drive a car. Samuel loves flying for both work and fun, deeming the air to be the only place his family can’t chide or tease him. After his obligatory service, the Royal Family keeps a small, private plane for his singular use.

As he will not inherit the Dukedom (that will go to Liam), Samuel is both career-minded and a full-time working Royal. His charity work and proposed policies revolve around the arts, from new museums to theaters and productions to educational and grant opportunities. He is always working to add more cultural exhibits to every city and town in Novoselic. 

It is often said by the press and public alike that Samuel acts more like they’d expect from the future Duke than Liam, a comment that never fails to upset the entire family. 

[randomized-ice]

Time to imagine and write down Hokage Iruka headcanons bc I love this too much to let it go~

Naruto realizes that being Hokage isn’t for him bc he’s more of a fighter than a desk worker

Kakashi really thought he was gonna get to retire as soon as Naruto was ready. Lol nope

Paperwork and stuff is not for Kakashi AT ALL. He hates being stuck at a desk. He was born a FIGHTER not a HOKAGE. Just let the man beat up enemy nin :(

One day, he’s walking around reading icha-icha when he overhears a peculiar conversation

It’s Iruka, and he’s chatting with Anko. But what caught Kakashi’s attention is that he’s talking about what he would do if he was Hokage.

Kakashi decided to listen in bc the man has no social skills at all and realized that Iruka was actually pretty well-versed in shinobi rules, scrolls, and did desk work 80% of the time.

Kakashi did some research and realized that Iruka actually did embody the Will of Fire. The demon inside Naruto killed Iruka’s parents, yet Iruka cares for Naruto more than anything. When Iruka realized he had been neglecting Naruto’s feelings, he apologized, shared his feelings with Naruto, and risked his life for Naruto, protecting him from his best friend. When put between the choice of protecting a child and running away with his best friend and becoming powerful, he chose Naruto. He chose the Leaf Village. Iruka taught the younger generation, and cared for every one of his students, spending time with them if they needed it, even if he had work to do. He loved everyone, was polite, and refused to abandon the Leaf Village, even though it was the same place that hurt him so much as a child. But he was actually a very confusing person. He was a ruthless prankster, yet he gave everybody his heart and soul. He had been hurt by people he trusted (Mizuki), but he continued to love everybody. Chunins are usually disregarded as weaklings by jonin and many others, yet everybody liked to spend time with Iruka. Insult the babey and you’ll have four ANBU teams ready to commit homicide. Iruka made people feel human.

Iruka was the perfect candidate. But due to recent and past events, Kakashi knew Iruka had a small grudge against him. After all, he did put his genins in danger in the chunin exams, even though Iruka who probably knew better protested. Then Sasuke ended up running away, and Sakura and Naruto were mentally scarred. Iruka had always been slightly passive-aggressive with him after that. And if Iruka disliked Kakashi there was no way he would accept the Hokage position. Plus, teaching was his passion.

But Kakashi went anyway bc the sooner he could chidori the living jesus out of opponents, the better.

When Iruka got the news that he was the best candidate for Hokage that Kakashi had ever met, to say he was surprised was an understatement. He nearly exploded from confusion, happiness, and outright confusion. 

Iruka agreed to take on the Hokage role, but with a twist. He still taught at the Academy. Now, this was a huge twist. Hokages usually didn’t interact with children as much during their time in office. But Iruka was determined to keep his teaching job. He loved his kids.

The people of the Leaf Village were confused to say the least. Most of the Hokages were super powerful, but Iruka was just a random teacher. Some people disagreed with Kakashi’s decision, while others thought it was great that they had a Hokage that wasn’t super powerful. It showed that ANYONE could be Hokage, and you didn’t have to kill God to do it. You just had to be a decent person.

When Iruka was sworn in as Hokage, he promised that he would do his best to make the village safe and fair for everybody. But the biggest surprise was when Killer B himself came, and spoke about how Iruka would be a great Hokage, and that he didn’t need to be a Leaf shinobi to know that. Iruka was surprised about that too. (Remember that fist-bump scene? Because I sure do)

Iruka actually kept his promise. He made things better for orphans, strengthened Konoha’s defense system, made sure everybody in ANBU and Konoha had access to therapy, made sure to extend the Academy’s teachings to more subjects so you didn’t have to be a ninja, refused to send children on the front lines of war (COUGH COUGH), fixed the economy, and was still able to teach his students.

Iruka Umino is one of the best Hokages in history, bc he saw everything going on in the system, and changed it.

When his face was carved on the mountain, Naruto immediately pulled one of his old pranks, and Iruka personally chased him down just like old times.

Iruka got his own special ramen dish at Ichiraku’s and he loved it so much.

I’m writing a fic about this. I need it. Hokage Iruka is L I F E.

I honestly don’t know if this is what @agentr104 meant but I needed an excuse to write this. Also, I hope y’all know that I do take requests, I love seeing other peoples thought processes <3

[tawakkull]

Forgiveness and Tolerance in Islam: Tolerance in the life of the individual and society: Part1

First of all, I would like to indicate that tolerance is not something that was invented by us. Tolerance was first introduced on this Earth by the prophets whose teacher was God. Even if it would not be correct to attribute tolerance to God, He has attributes that are rooted in tolerance, like forgiveness, the forgiveness of sins, compassion and mercy for all creatures, and the veiling of the shame and faults of others. The All-Forgiving, the All-Merciful, and the All-Veiling of Faults are among the most frequently mentioned names of God in the Qur'an.

The golden era when tolerance was represented at its apex was the Age of Happiness, and I would like to give some true examples from that historical time, events that extend in a line from that “period of roses” until today.

An Example of Forgiveness

As is known, in the historical “Event of Slander” the hypocrites made slanderous accusations against ‘A'isha, the chaste wife of the Prophet and the spiritual mother of all believers. 'A'isha has a special place among the pure wives of the Prophet because the Prophet was the first man she saw when she awakened to womanhood. In a period when she became fully conscious of her womanhood, 'A'isha became a member of the Prophet’s pure household and there she breathed only an atmosphere of chastity and honor. 'A'isha, an exemplar of chastity, became subjected to a planned slander campaign during this period. Both herself, her family and the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, suffered much because of this slander. However, the verse revealed approximately one month later declared 'A'isha’s unadulterated purity and innocence. However, her father Abu Bakr, who had been giving financial support to one of those who was involved in the slander, took an oath not to give any more support to this person. But, the verse that was revealed warned that the most faithful friend of the Prophet, Sultan of Tolerance, should be more lenient.The verse reads:

Let not those among you who are endowed with grace and amplitude of means resolve by oath against helping their kinsmen, those in want, and those who have left their homes in God’s cause: let them forgive and overlook. Do you not wish that God should forgive you? For God is the All-Forgiving, the All-Merciful. (An-Nur 24:22)

I want to draw you attention in particular to the expression at the end of this verse: Do you not wish that God should forgive you? For God is the All-Forgiving, the All-Merciful. In reality, the All-Merciful God Whose mercy is unequalled and compared to which all the mercy in the world is but a drop in the ocean, continually secrets Himself and, in spite of everything, forgives us, forgives everything, from the unbecoming words that enter our ears and darken our spirits to the filth that flows into us from the universe and back to the society that we have polluted. His question, Do you not wish that God should forgive you? directed at people like us who are always in need of purification, is very fine and sincere and worthy of being coveted. By means of this verse, God indicates that just as He forgives us, so too should we forgive one another for the mistakes we make, and this is illustrated to us as a Qur'anic virtue in the character of Abu Bakr.

Forgiveness and tolerance are given great importance in the messages of the Prophets, which are from divine and celestial sources.

A prophet has the duty of educating and training others. In order for the truths that he is conveying to influence the hearts of others, his own heart must beat with forgiveness and tolerance. When some faults that are the result of a person’s nature collide with the tolerant atmosphere of a person of truth, they melt and disperse like a meteor. Instead of splitting open someone’s head, the legions of light, which resemble the lamps lit on nights of celebration, will soothe the eyes and give joy to the heart. As I mentioned before, there is in actual fact such a divine virtue recommended in our Prophet’s hadith, “Take on the virtue of God."Does not God Himself always forgive those who deny Him? On the cosmic plane this crime is unforgivable murder and rebellion. But look at the vastness of God’s forgiveness and pardon. In spite of the ungratefulness of His servants, He says:

Without doubt My Mercy precedes My Wrath.

My Mercy extends to all things. (Al-Araf 7:156)

With His attribute of Mercy, without showing any bias, He nurtures and protects all human beings and, indeed all animate creatures, and He continues to give sustenance even to those who deny Him.

Here it is possible to view all the prophets from the same perspective and present some examples from all of them, but let it suffice to give a few from Prophet Muhammad, the essence of existence, peace and blessings be upon him.

Hamza was one of the Companions whom the Prophet loved most. He was not just an ordinary Companion, he was also the Prophet’s uncle and they had both been nursed by the same wetnurse. Suppressing his honor and pride, this lionhearted giant of a man entered the spiritual atmosphere of the Pride of Humanity, peace and blessings be upon him. Supporting his nephew and saying "I am with you” at a critical time when the Muslims were weak in numbers raised his value manifold. Thus, by demonstrating the qualities of his closeness on the spiritual plane as well as on the physical plane, he was able to reach what seemed to be an unattainable height of greatness. Of course, the loyalty of this great hero was rewarded by the Prophet. He was martyred one day while fighting at Uhud; his bloody murderers had sworn to raid Madina and to run every man and woman through. At the hands of his murderers, their hands, eyes and thoughts bloody, Hamza was chopped into pieces. His sacred eyes were gorged out, his ears and lips cut off, his chest was split open and his liver was torn out and bitten into. The Messenger of God, peace and blessings be upon him, whose bosom was full of compassion and mercy, looked at this horrifying scene and his eyes filled with tears like clouds of rain. There were seventy martyrs at the battle of Uhud—twice as many again had been wounded—women were widowed and children were orphaned. When he looked at this scene with the compassion of a prophet, it was almost unbearable. The children of Hamza and the children of other martyrs appeared before the Prophet, shivering like newly hatched chicks. As related in his biographical works, no sooner than the thought “In retribution for what they have done …” had crossed his mind was the following verse revealed:

And if you have to respond to any wrong, respond to the extent of the wrong done to you; but if you endure patiently, this is indeed better for he who endures. (An-Nahl 16:126)

In this verse he was being directed to a horizon of understanding according to his level, and in other words he was told, “You should not think like that.” That sun of leniency and tolerance, peace and blessings be upon him, buried all the pain in his chest and chose the road of patience.

Actually, the Prophet interwove the whole of his life, not only that moment, with tolerance. The polytheists did not spare him any torture or trouble. They drove him out of his homeland, formed armies, and attacked him. But even after the conquest of Makka, when the pagans were anxiously waiting to see how they would be treated, as a sign of his vast compassion and mercy the Prophet said:

I speak as Joseph spoke to his brothers: There is no reproach for you today (because of your previous acts). God will forgive you also. He is the Most Merciful of the Merciful. Go; you are free.[ Ibn al-Athir, Usd al-Ghabah, 1:528-532. ]

The Qur'an is the source of leniency and tolerance, and because these concepts have flowed to us like an exuberant stream from the Conveyor of the Qur'an, peace and blessings be upon him, we cannot think any differently on this matter. Any contrary idea would mean that we do not know the Qur'an and God’s Messenger. From this perspective, because tolerance derives from the Qur'an and the Sunna, it is a Muslim’s natural virtue and, because of the sources it is derived from, it is permanent. The covenant that the Messenger of God presented to the Christians and Jews is truly worthy of attention (the original text of the covenant is preserved today in England). Compared to the principles that our Prophet put forth, humanity today has not attained his level, neither with the declarations of human rights put forth in The Hague or Strasbourg nor that in Helsinki. That Man of Great Forbearance lived together closely with the People of the Book in Madina. In fact, he was even able to find points of agreement with the dark souls who, even though they said, “We are Muslims,” continuously caused friction everywhere and tried to play those with clear consciences one against another. He embraced them by means of forbearance. Upon the death of Abdullah ibn Ubayy, who had been a lifelong enemy, the Prophet even gave his shirt as a burial shroud. Saying, “As long as there is no revelation forbidding me, I will attend his funeral,” and he showed his respect to the deceased.There is no message similar or equal to the message given to humankind by Prophet Muhammad. Thus, it is not possible for those who try and follow “the Most Beautiful Example” to think differently from what he thought.

In this respect, it is not possible to think of tolerance as something that is separate from us; it is a different color and tone of our feelings and thoughts. From this time on platforms for tolerance should be developed in our society. Tolerance should be rewarded, it should be given precedence at every opportunity, and those who behave with forgiveness to others should have a chance to express themselves.

[fyeahjacquelinecarlyle]

The Trouble with Ian

Warning: a Jacqueline spoiler for an upcoming episode is mentioned.

Let’s start at the very beginning - as the legend goes, a very good place to start. We only saw Ian Carlyle in a handful of episodes in the first three seasons of The Bold Type, but everything we saw indicated he was a loving, supportive and understanding husband - so understanding, in fact, that, when Jacqueline couldn’t make it to their anniversary dinner due to a work emergency, he brought the anniversary dinner to her. There were never any signs of trouble in paradise, not until season 4 rolled around, that is.

This whole mess started in the premiere episode, Legends of the Fall Issue, with a perfectly innocent game of chess in the Carlyle residence. Ian and Jacqueline appeared to be having a nice and relaxing time together, reminiscing about the day they met when he encouraged his wife to “press pause” for a while on the heels of her losing her job at Scarlet. He then followed that apparently innocuous and selfless statement, which was not well received by Jacqueline (“I’m not really the press-pause type…”) with, “I wouldn’t mind going back to work.” Jacqueline’s surprised reaction told us that was definitely the first she was hearing of it. After the briefest of hesitations, she was encouraging, telling him that he should - go back to work, that is. She had barely gotten the words out when Ian said, “Ok, I’ll put out some feelers,” got up and left the room to do just that.

Looking back, that was a red flag - this wasn’t something that had recently occurred to him, or that he had been thinking about casually. It was something that he had been wanting for a long time, as he wasn’t even willing to properly discuss the subject with his wife before taking action - hell, he wasn’t even willing to continue their game of chess. He literally got up and left to try and get a job. Judging by Jacqueline’s expressions, she was quite taken aback, either by his wish to go back to work (again, it was clearly news to her) or the very eager way he was going about it. Possibly both.

Let’s also consider something else that’s important here. Jacqueline had just lost her job of a decade. A job that meant the world to her.  She might not have been crying in a corner but that’s because that’s not Jacqueline Carlyle’s way of dealing - and if anyone would know that other than the audience, it’d be her husband. She was upset enough she was day drinking with her then former employee (tbf, it’s Jane, who’s more than “an employee” to her, but I digress) earlier that day, not to mention upset enough to admit to said employee her first instinct after the news of her ousting had been to brandish a pitchfork and go burn down Safford. While that was an obvious exaggeration, and Jacqueline would never resort to such (literal or metaphorical) extreme measures, it was a clear indication that she was distressed by what had happened. And did we see Ian being there for his wife, comforting her, encouraging her? Nope. Just like we didn’t see him doing any of those things while she was struggling with Patrick’s arrival and the changes happening at Scarlet back in season 3. It took Jane (once again, Tiny Jane to the rescue!) to give Jacqueline the support and encouragement she needed to keep on keeping on at the time.

All of this to say… there’s a limit to how much credit Ian gets here. As much as their life has played out off-screen the majority of the time, we as an audience mostly respond to what we actually see, and Ian being a loving, caring, supporting husband is something that was basically left back in season 1. We acknowledge and accept he’s been home, taking care of the kids, having put his career ambitions in the back burner. He gets full credit for that. But let’s also not forget that was a decision he made in conjunction with his wife years ago, as it was probably the best thing for their family at the time. The current state of affairs wasn’t imposed on him - it was something he helped decide and required his active participation.

Ian feels differently now, as is his right. He wants to go back to work and that is fine. The problem comes when this wish is communicated, acted on and expected to come to fruition in the literal space of a few days, at most (as every fan knows, time goes by sloooowly in the Bold Type verse).  To review - Jacqueline working and Ian being a full time “househusband” has been the status quo for the past ten years (and something the audience suddenly learned about this season). Jacqueline loses her job for a day, at most, during which time he tells her he "wouldn't mind" going back to work, manages to get some leads…

… and then Jacqueline gets her job back! She is left scrambling - let’s not forget she’s just been informed Scarlet is going fully digital, something totally new to her and a completely new direction for the magazine. At first, she thinks Patrick will be able to help out and share the load… but then he jumps ship and she is left all alone to tackle this new professional challenge… not to mention a new, unexpected challenge in the home front--

Yes, because what we soon learn is that Jacqueline being back at Scarlet doesn’t make Ian reassess his plans, which go full steam ahead. Jacqueline continues to support her husband and commits her most egregious offense in episode 2, #scarlet, when she (gasp!) is unable to leave the office in the middle of the day to be home for their son’s tutor - which means Ian has to rearrange a meeting about a potential job (and is angry enough about it that he hangs up without saying goodbye). He’s clearly successful in his efforts to “make it work”, however, because, after a Scarlet event, he simply announces to his wife that he not only received but already accepted an offer for a job that will take him halfway across the world… to the Ukraine.

Does Jacqueline protest? Put up a fight? Put her foot down? Nope. We see her accepting his decision and finding ways to make their home and her work life work, as best as she can. We see her arranging her schedule to fit in a bon voyage luncheon to Ian and a Scarlet photo shoot, which happen on the same day.

Throughout this whole episode, we see Ian pulling faces and making snide remarks under his breath, out of earshot of his wife, who appears none the wiser about his feelings - the one exception being when Ian arrives with the boys at the Scarlet photo shoot (they’re to leave for his luncheon after). The next words out of his mouth after “Hi” are “So… ETD?”. Jacqueline, is once again, taken by surprise, this time by her husband being so anxious to leave after he’s just arrived. Everything indicates they attend the luncheon as planned, however, which means that, that day, at least, Jacqueline is able to reconcile her home and work lives, making both RJ and Ian happy…

…or does she?

That night, as Ian is packing for Europe, still sullen faced, an uncharacteristically timid Jacqueline makes a remark about a clearly favorite shirt he’s taking with him and asks if he has plans to “go out” while he’s away… to which Ian says yes, because he’d like to, and I quote, “have fun for a change.”

This is the final straw. Jacqueline, who appears to finally put two and two together, asks Ian, point-blank, how unhappy he is with their marriage. Instead of giving a direct answer, he turns the tables on her, and says, “I think about as unhappy as you… Jacqueline.” She is, once again, taken aback, and silent for a long time. All she manages, by way of reply, is a simple “Right”, and nothing else. He leaves the room.

There’s a lot to unpack here. He got a job, which is exactly what he wanted. Meanwhile, Jacqueline is willing to hold down the fort at home so he can go back to work. Why isn’t he happy? Is it because she wasn’t perfect right out the gate, unable to “share the load” the first time she had to, and he had to shift some things around to make his brand new career plans work with his long-established responsibilities at home? Is it because we were shown how much Jacqueline cares about Scarlet, at times excitedly talking to her husband about the new challenges she was facing and other times venting to him about the issues she was encountering? Is it because she didn’t appear to be sad or upset that he was leaving or ask him to stay…

…

Ding ding ding?

One of the times we saw Ian annoyed and sulking was when Jacqueline was having a good time at the aforementioned photo shoot, demonstrating her abilities at a game of flip cup to the shock and delight of Alex and Andrew. Maybe jealousy is a factor here - jealousy of how much time and energy Jacqueline devotes to the magazine and how she seems to thrive and come alive when she’s working. Maybe Ian feels he comes second to Scarlet and just can’t deal anymore.

In any event, Jacqueline and Ian’s issues appear to extend beyond his employment status. Perhaps the most worrisome part is that Jacqueline appeared, for the most part, oblivious to Ian’s misery. During these first few episodes, we’d see her being very animated and affectionate towards her husband, indicating she was not the one with the problem... he was. And the depth of his anger and frustration indicates he’s been nurturing negative feelings towards his wife for a long time now. Communication clearly is a major issue here, but as the discontent party, it was up to Ian to lay the cards out on the table and let Jacqueline know how he felt. Only then would we have been able to judge her own behavior when it comes to their issues - as it is, it’s hard to put her at fault here.

As far as Ian going back to work, the most glaring issue here is time, which is something he was not willing to give Jacqueline, who was expected to learn about his desire to resume his career, process the information and then adjust her life to make it happen, practically overnight. Such a drastic change in a family’s life should come with planning - not even short-term, but medium to long-term planning. Ian and Jacqueline are such hands-on parents that, years ago, they made the decision that one of them shouldn’t hold a job so they could be there for those kids full time, despite them having more than enough money to hire nannies and tutors to take them off their hands. Now, all of a sudden, he is more than ready to leave for Europe and not even give these children the chance to adapt to their dad suddenly being away. We know Ian was working for Rolling Stone Magazine in the US when he met Jacqueline back in the ’90s. Couldn’t he have gotten his feet wet with a local job first, that would allow him to be home for dinner most nights? It’s not as though he’s looked long and hard closer to home before accepting the Ukraine gig. Not to mention, it’d only be fair to give his wife a couple of months - hell, a couple of weeks - to adjust to her new reality at work before turning her entire life upside down. The man made it a full decade without a job - surely a few more weeks/months would not have killed him.

One can’t help but wonder what is the intended play here. One of the spoilers for season 4 of The Bold Type says Jacqueline will run into someone from her past who’ll “give her clarity about what she wants out of life”. My biggest fear is that these little moments where we witnessed Jacqueline absorbed in her work and Ian unhappy are supposed to make the audience feel bad for the “supportive” and “sacrificing” husband who put his career on hold so his wife could realize her own ambitions, and, as she is about to lose him, she finally comes to the realization that she needs to devote more of her time and attention to him and their family, or be more clear about how much they mean to her. In other words, she’s a thoughtless workaholic who needs to appreciate her hubby more and just… be better, because women can and should have it all, all at once, all of the time.

I swear to God...

Ok, ok, I’m perfectly aware I’m jumping the gun here. We’re only three episodes in, and a lot of water is about to go under that metaphorical bridge. What I described above is basically my worst, nightmare scenario. The dream scenario would be Ian having an open, frank conversation with his wife where he tells her exactly what his problem is. A conversation where he accepts fault for his passive-aggressive behavior and the way he went about going back to work, not including her in his decision making process. And I’m not saying Jacqueline’s perfect here, by any means - if anything she could’ve noticed Ian’s feelings sooner (seriously, how long has he been this pissy?). The reason I’m not nearly as hard on her is that Ian’s sins are so numerous and so egregious it’s very difficult to look past them.

I hope the show explores why Jacqueline has been so oblivious… or would indifferent be a better word? Is she content with the way things are between her and her husband? Does she care more about Scarlet than she does Ian, at the end of the day? If the answer to those questions is ‘yes’, then that’s bad news for their marriage, but all I ask is that the outcome of this storyline be consistent with the behavior of both characters we’ve seen (and continue to see..) on screen. As fans, we want - we crave - consistency. At the end of the day, a story that makes sense and does justice to the characters we know and love means more than one that has a happy ending.

[imuybemovoko]

I die inside while dissecting Jesus music

For this fun little exercise in self-torture, I’m going to find a weird worship song and dissect it. Today I feel like saying death-cult a distressing number of times so I’m going to find one that talks about how the next world is supposed to be better for this one. 

I’m probably going to regret this. And probably cope by blasting metal while I do this. 

I’ll go with a bit of low-hanging fruit for this first one: Even So Come. It’s attributed six ways to Sunday because like seven different artists/groups have a recording of it somewhere out public, but this lyric site thingy says Chris Tomlin. Some of these songs get wildly popular to the point where even as a church guitar guy (read: very large fan of this shitty music) I tended to find it a bit confusing to tell who originally wrote them. This is an example. I think it was probably Kristian Stanfill but uh... I can never be 100% sure. I’ve been wrong about ones I was way more sure about before.

This song is repetitive as fuck, like a lot of these, because what helps indoctrinate people more than literally singing the same words for 15 minutes? 

Let’s get into this shit.

The song

I’ll spare you a few minutes of your life if you want to keep it. I already linked the lyrics, but I’ll give this a quick listen to make sure Stanfill doesn’t literally freehand some new lyrics during the video; if he does, I’ll discuss that too I suppose. The whole point of this is that I’m listening to this shit so you don’t have to. But if you really want to, then go off I guess. I can’t and honestly wouldn’t try to stop you. Unless this shit is triggering to you. In that case please don’t listen. It used to fuck me up hard when my brother would blast songs like this in the shower after I deconverted. I don’t want that happening to anyone out there. Tread with caution.

Okay. I wrote that while I was listening, and apparently he doesn’t yeet off into new spontaneous lyrics at any point. I think that’s more of a Bethel thing, but I don’t remember it being exclusive to them so I had to make sure. 

Ok, let’s do this more or less in order. I’ll take it a verse at a time. But first, let’s talk formatting. The first two verses aren’t separated by anything, and the third is after the first chorus. After the third verse they play the chorus again, then the bridge. The AZLyrics entry under Tomlin lists it twice; Stanfill plays it twice. When I was on the worship team at a church, we’d typically play the bridge four times for extra drama. After this, they end with two tricks. First is that they play the first half or so of the chorus, then a whole chorus right after it. Again, this is for extra drama. The leader of the worship team at my old church would tend to point to one part of the song as the “climax” and we’d do a fair amount of this kind of shit leading up to it. In this particular case, it’s actually most of the chorus, leaving off only the “even so come” lines. The break is at a lyrically appropriate place more often than it’s just like “haha 2 bars into the chorus” or something like that because of course the message has to be consistent.  After this, they fade the song out by repeating the last line or two, like, umpteen times to foster a contemplative mood. (It works. I’ve been on both ends of this dynamic. If you’re in a more charismatic crowd, my experience suggests that this final repetition is the most likely point where someone’s going to fall out and start speaking in tongues or something. Also, in those circles sometimes one of the vocalists, most often the team leader because of course, will give some kind of “word from God” to the congregation.) That’s the format, and it’s a very common one. At church camps and retreats and events like those, often they’ll loop choruses or bridges or ending tags or, sometimes (but far less often), verses and extend a song like this one to like fifteen or twenty minutes. In a typical church service they don’t really do it that way though because people might get impatient or something. 

On to the lyrics of this song. I’ll address the verses in order, then the chorus and bridge, then talk ordering, because doing this chronologically would get annoying as fuck. The first verse is as follows: 

All of creation All of the earth Make straight a highway A path for the Lord Jesus is coming soon

Notice the equivocation in the first two lines here. The author most likely believes this is an accurate thing to equivocate, and so do most of their audience. 

The next two lines are a similar repetition, using both modern and more Biblically-flavored language, in reference to Mark 1:3. The particular language used is not altogether different from most English translations. These lines, both in the sense that the author intends and in their function in the song, are meant to prepare the listener for what follows:  “Jesus is coming soon.” A reminder of the inevitable apocalypse most Christian sects teach and, in their view, the second chronologically of two most important events in the entire history and future of the world (the first being the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ). Every verse of the song ends with this reminder. 

To boil the message of this verse down into one word:

(I have entirely too much fun with this image lol)

The second verse:

Call back the sinner Wake up the saint Let every nation Shout of Your fame Jesus is coming soon

“Call back the sinner” implies a return to origins and contains an implicit reference to the prodigal son in the parable in Luke 15. The implication is that being a “sinner” (and I’ll discuss the dichotomy in a second here) is a life of running away from God either by ignorance or by choice, and that they were originally with God. The typical narrative on the mechanisms of the fall of man seems to suggest otherwise because only Adam and Eve were technically originally with God and everyone else starts out separated because of that lovely little generational curse thingy, this is a bit of an odd take, but in light of the evangelical perspective that not only a god, but their god is so self evident that people have to make the active choice to not believe, this makes an entire hell of a lot of sense, and “calling back the sinner” could entail saying “lol stop wasting your energy running from what you know.” 

The next line engages in a bit of common guilt-tripping. Saying “wake up the saint” implies that believers and churches have fallen asleep in some sense, and that’s actually a perspective referenced in the letters to the seven churches in Revelation, each church getting a different flavor of messaging like this. When churches and saints are called to “wake up”, it means to cease engaging in whatever behavior is apparently polluting their message, i.e. forgetting the original reason they’re doing this, normalizing “worldly” practices, bad leadership paradigms, etc. Thus, I’m inclined to read this line as something like “you’re better than the rest of humanity; act like it.

Also of note is this dichotomy established here between “sinners” and “saints”. This is, on paper at least, the only important distinction in evangelicalism. (In practice they have a lot of shitty perspectives on women because of Paul’s writings as well as some class and/or racial biases, unconscious or conscious depending on the particular congregation.) A “saint” is a “true” Christian, one who is “set apart” from the world by God. A “sinner” is literally anyone else. In addition to their entire laundry list of harmless actions that are considered sins, Evangelicals (and probably many other Christians honestly) will say that to be non-Christian is a sin. In my old church and its affiliates I often heard that to remain non-Christian for an entire lifetime is the only unforgivable sin, identifying it with the “blasphemy of the Holy Spirit” referenced in Matthew 12:31. There are a wide variety of perspectives on what this “blasphemy of the Holy Spirit” actually means, and I can really only confidently speak to Calvary Chapel’s perspective on that. In any case, this song makes use of the “sinner vs saint” dichotomy common in Christianity. I analyze it as a typical “us vs them” with an added twist that says “the ‘them’ can become us and that’s better”. 

After this is a reference to the passages in the Bible that speak of the Gospel being spread to “every nation” and things such as that, and that every nation will come under Christ’s lordship at the end of time. Then there’s a reminder that the singer is awaiting this apparently fast-approaching end. 

The third verse:

There will be justice All will be new Your name forever Faithful and true Jesus is coming soon

This third verse is mostly a reference to events predicted to occur after the second coming of Christ. In Revelation, among other places, there is a described sequence of events in which the world comes absolutely fucking unglued, falls under the thumb of a tyrannical world government run by some guy who lets himself get possessed by Satan, and then is yeeted by God and soaked in the blood of Satan’s armies at the final battle. A bit later, for some reason Satan has to be let go for a bit, but he loses hard once again. After this, God yeets the unbelievers into hellfire and makes a new world which he rules forever. In short, the collapse, battles, and Great Divine Yeet are what this “justice” describes. The remaining lines speak of this renewed world run by Jesus himself. Lastly, we have the reminder that this is all going to happen before very long here. 

There’s a bit of a double-reference thing going on here and in the second verse too, and I’m honestly not entirely sure what to make of it, but it shows up often in contemporary Christian music. They’ll switch between referring to God in second person (Your name forever) and in third person (Jesus is coming soon). It seems ...most likely to be a matter of convenience, and I’m rather inclined to treat it as that because the other things I think of seem either counter-productive or very, very outlandish. Like, are they alternating between addressing God and addressing the listener? Maybe, but the message of this song is so much more listener-directed that I find that thought kinda weird.

In any case, that’s the verses. 

Now let’s get to the chorus. This is repeated after the first two verses and again several times after the third, and it contains a lot of deeply cursed metaphors. I mean holy fuck. 

Like a bride Waiting for her groom We'll be a church Ready for You Every heart longing for our King We sing Even so come Lord Jesus come Even so come Lord Jesus come

So the first two little couplets here refer to a metaphor found in several places in scripture where the church is the “bride” of Christ.  This. is. CREEPY! In the old testament, the role of the wife is often analogous to that of property, so that’s deeply gross. Further, Paul says men are the head of women, i.e. have great authority over them, and women should be subservient. Jesus doesn’t honestly do a whole hell of a lot to resist this, and powerful women throughout most of the scriptures are either defined as attaining their power in “God-honoring” subservient ways like Esther or as dangerous demonic influences operating under the “spirit of Jezebel”. (”Jezebel” is literally a scriptural term for this kind of thing; one of the church letters in Revelation uses it. Many evangelicals/fundies add “spirit of” because of their borderline-animistic take on spiritual warfare. I might describe that in more detail in a later post. It’s a metaphor based on an old-testament queen who is presented as manipulative and narcissistic, taking the real power in the kingdom from her husband by manipulation and doing a great deal of damage with it.) Thus, in this context, I find the “bride” metaphors inextricable from a tyrannical, abusive relationship in which the man, or in this case Christ, is the absolute head. Biblical ideas on marriage and family life are an entire problem too, establishing what I feel very confident in describing as an abusive power dynamic. Thus, this song references a metaphor by which Christ is described as having abusive control over his people. @kristian stanfill thanks I hate it. @whoever the fuck wrote the bible thanks I hate it. The couplet in this song is describing a situation in which the church is waiting to submit to an abusive authority and it’s fucking disgusting and I hate that I used to live that way.

The next line, “every heart longing for our king”, indicates that it’s normative to strongly desire this power dynamic and expresses a probably-genuine (mine was) desire for more of Jesus on the part of the writer and the singer. So with these preconditions established, they say, “we sing, even so come, Lord Jesus, come”, repeating “even so come” and on twice for added weight. The chorus and bridge are, by the way, where this seems to get deathculty. 

Remember that in referencing the coming of Jesus, they reference ideas that this world is shitty and being dead and in heaven/having the world destroyed by God and replaced is going to be a hell of a lot better. The Bible and many churches, particularly evangelicals, will even use language like “dying to oneself” to refer to the process of laying down one’s life for the cause of Jesus. Thus, death metaphors infiltrate their literal daily living. The general attitude that’s expected for people to have in those circumstances is one of “I won’t seek death actively but I will welcome it when the time comes”, and coupled with the way the other forms of abuse broke me, this had me fantasizing about dying in third-world countries for getting too annoying about Jesus. So that’s pretty wack, I suppose. This belief system is one that puts death on a very disturbing pedestal. This entire song is about preparing for the return of Jesus, which is going to bring a hell of a lot of death if it happens as they predict. This very deadly event is what “Jesus is coming soon” entails, and it’s one of two possible interpretations that I can think of to apply to these “even so come lord Jesus come” lines. The other is that they believe that Jesus is present with them when they worship (Matthew 18:20) and they seek to experience this presence. But the preparatory nature of this song, in my experience at least, puts very strong priority on the first sense, even though it can be, and in church settings often functions as, both. These lines are a plea for personal transformation and for the apocalypse. In the vanishingly unlikely event that the Christian version of the divine turns out to be true, billions will die in wars and disasters (some actively caused by God’s agents) and many of those same billions and many more people, including me, will be victims of the Great Cosmic Yeet and land in hellfire forever. And they want this to happen sooner rather than later. That’s literally the main point of this song. 

So we wait We wait for You God we wait You're coming soon

This is the bridge. It’s typically repeated kind of a lot. Like, I mean holy fuck they repeat this. It’s literally just “we’re excited for the second coming of Christ”. You know, in case someone needed a reminder that they want billions dead, even more people yeeted into hellfire, and the entire world destroyed. Evangelical and fundamentalist strains of Christianity are literally a death cult. 

So with that rant-filled analysis out of the way, let’s see if I can talk formatting without dying inside again or getting too pissed off. 

On the lyric site I linked above (and I’ll link it again so you don’t have to scroll through whatever literal mountain of text and cursed images I’ve produced) this goes verse 1, verse 2, chorus, verse 3, chorus, bridge twice, weird most-of-chorus tag, chorus, the last two lines like several times over. Thus, already we have multiple repetitions of most concepts found in this song. Also, this two verses-chorus-third verse-chorus-bridge several times-chorus twice-ending tag format is quite common in contemporary Christian music, in the studio recordings, official lyrics, and chord sheets you’ll find out there. But I cannot stress enough that this structure, especially the bridge and latter choruses but the entire structure including the verses, is extremely modular. Anything can be repeated, or repeated more times. Anything can be re-inserted in another place. This is mostly a Bethel thing in my experience, but there can be instrumental breaks for one of the vocalists to yeet out entirely spontaneous lyrics. There can be massive empty instrumental breaks, or instrumental breaks with spoken words in them. And I’ve seen even less of that, but parts of other songs can be inserted just about anywhere too, and I’ve actually participated in that one on occasion. To an extent, any music can be handled in ways like this, but it seems to me like contemporary Christian music is consciously designed that way because its target audience goes nuts over long, “spirit-filled” songs played at church camps or an extra spicy church service. 

It’s also worth noting, and if I end up doing a whole lot of these I’ll probably explain this in a great deal more depth, that these songs can get reasonably similar to one another. I think that’s because to a very large extent, the words and structure matter a hell of a lot less than the way they set the mood. You can get the same impact on a crowd of willing Christians from probably literally any combination of these songs. I always had my favorites but that didn’t seem to matter that much. 

I’m inclined to say some of the same things about a lot of modern music, actually. It has common structures, a lot of music is interchangeable for certain moods, etc. But I can’t say a thing about the modularity of modern music. A song seems to be way more of a distinct unit in most environments. Mashups do happen, but massive repetitions of one piece of a song generally don’t in any context that I’m aware of. They’ll jam out on an instrumental for a while at concerts sometimes, but you really don’t get this, like, singing “Crawl on your belly til the sun goes down, I’ll never wear your broken crown, I took the road and I fucked it all away, in this twilight how dare you speak of grace” more than like the twice they do it in the studio recording from most groups like you do in very many Christian music settings. (The example chorus I put here was from Mumford and Sons- Broken Crown. It’s an amazing song, I totally recommend it lol it was the first one that popped into my head for this purpose.) Some other commonalities are present in a lot of modern music, but for the most part, that modularity would just come across extremely weird. I think just about every time I’ve either seen or been involved in the playing of Even So Come at a church, the musicians engaged in at least some degree of modularity, most often by repeating the bridge but sometimes uh... holy crap. Because of the extreme prolific use of these songs in church or retreat settings, I’m inclined to list the modularity as the single most important aspect of the formatting of this song and of many others.

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Three Hundred Forty-Three: Ice Cream] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata ] [ SasuHina ] [ Verse: A Light Amongst Shadows ] [ AO3 Link ]

“Hyūga.”

Gaze caught in a shop window, Hinata nearly doubles over as a voice suddenly sounds behind her, heart rate climbing in surprise. A rather ungraceful turn reveals it to be none other than Sasuke! “S...Sasuke-kun…?”

The Uchiha has - since the end of the war - become a slightly unintended friend. With how many bridges he burned (and admittedly many of them with reason), he wasn’t left with many people to socialize with. Not...that he’s been in much of a mood to socialize. But for some reason, the pair of them have just...ended up running into each other more often than not.

Not that Hinata has been opposed, per se. She just...didn’t expect it. Sasuke had barely spoken ten words to her before he’d left to seek power outside Konoha. And yet...part of her wonders if that’s the point. She’s one of the few people he hasn’t directly affected in any negative way.

...nor she in any way to him, either.

Of course, there’s a bit more to it than that - common friendships, odd parallels in their pasts they’ve been discovering...and their meshing social circles have meant it almost being impossible to go without running into one another for long.

And so, for whatever his reason may be, Sasuke has been extending a rather awkward, formal olive branch. Hinata, in the meantime, has had no real reason to reject it. Hence their budding but...rather undefined friendship as of late.

He’s still...adjusting, after all. And in some ways, so is she. The war has left its scars upon all of them...but few, she knows, more so than Sasuke. The situation involving his clan and the village - still a work in progress to be solved - immediately earned her sympathy. As someone from a ‘royal’ clan who has its share of troubled years past...she, more than most, can relate...even if not in exactly the same way.

Still, that’s not the current issue on the table.

He’s dressed in warmer clothes as per the season, given that it’s nearly the new year. And to her delight, he’s sporting the knit gloves and scarf she made him a few weeks past. And as is most usual, he’s without anyone else she knows. He tends to just...wander about on his own, for the most part...save for when the rest of team seven drags him out.

“...a-ano...was there something you, um...something you wanted, Sasuke-kun?”

“Was on my way to pick up lunch and saw you. Thought I’d say hi.”

“...oh!” She allows a small smile. “Well...hello! C-chilly day, isn’t it? Keeping, um...warm?”

“Yeah. That knitting of yours must be good.” He doesn’t admit that he rarely gets cold, anyway - his father used to tell stories about an Uchiha’s inner fire keeping them warm against any degree of dropping temperatures. Of course...he doesn’t know if that’s true, but it takes a fairly bad day to chill him. “Knitted anything else recently?”

“Yes, lots! I just finished a set for Hanabi, actually. And Naruto-kun said he’d like some. Orange, o-of course,” she lightly giggles.

Barely perceptible, Sasuke’s expression sours at the mention of the blond. “...keeping busy, then.”

“Yes, quite so. It, um...it’s relaxing, though. I like how repetitive it is. Lets me just sort of...zone out and go, you know?”

“Never had a hobby like that, so I wouldn’t know.”

“...oh! Well...it’s nice to have a little, um...change of pace. It lets me take my mind off of...everything else. Clan politics, or...missions. Maybe you could...find a pastime, Sasuke-kun.”

“Maybe. Mostly I just train when I want something to do, honestly.”

“That’s good, too!”

...they then reach a small impasse.

“W-well, um...I don’t want to keep you from your lunch,” Hinata then offers, smiling again. “But it was n-nice talking to you!”

“Have you eaten yet?”

The rather blunt question makes her pause. “Well, um...no. No, I haven’t. I was going to just make something at home, um…”

His expression remains carefully blank. “I won’t interrupt, then.”

“Did...did you want some company?”

A few months ago, Hinata would never dare ask a question so bold, not even of her best friend. To presume to be wanted wasn’t something she could really...do. But she’s done a vast amount of growing as of late, and...well, she’s tired of hesitation taking opportunities from her. Her years wasted chasing Naruto only to lose out taught her that much.

Sasuke, too, seems a bit taken aback by her forward response, dark brows lifting a smidge. “...sure,” is his reply once it sinks in. “If you don’t have anything else…?”

“Nope! I delivered a mission report earlier, and was just...w-wandering around before heading home.”

“...all right, then.” Well, his plans were to order out some yakiniku and take it home, but...well, he can’t really do that with a guest. Or, so he tells himself. Seems he’ll be sitting down to eat.

Hinata doesn’t object to the place, and they find a table off to one side of the restaurant. As their meat grills, they mostly pass the time with idle conversation.

“So, what was your mission?”

“Just a simple track and retrieve mission. Solo. A fraudulent jewelry maker was caught selling fake pieces to some n-noblewomen during that conference last week. He fled with the money and was heading to Iwa, but I c-caught up with him and dragged him back. It really wasn’t anything difficult, he w-wasn’t even a shinobi...he’d hired a few missing nin to help guard him but they were chūnin level at best. Probably oversold themselves to get in, and then were going to r-rob him after. Brought them in, too.”

“Must have earned you a fair bit.”

“Not too bad. In truth I have a good amount of savings...I don’t like to spend money. Even before I lost my inheritance I was frugal.”

The familiar topic makes him pause nonetheless. Hinata’s recounted the events leading to her loss of title - though mostly vaguely - before. “...good habit to have.”

“It drives my sister crazy.” Hinata cracks a small smile. “She’s...not so careful. Overall sure, but...she has many little splurges. Tries to get me to do the same. And when I don’t she b-buys me things herself.”

Before he can stop it, a small smile pulls at Sasuke’s lips. Were Itachi alive...he’d likely do the same. “I guess siblings always have to have some traits that are opposites.”

“True…”

Once their bellies are full, Sasuke pays the tab (much to Hinata’s annoyance (“It was me who invited you.” “I i-invited myself!”)) and they head back outside where a light snow has begun to fall.

“Ah…!”

“Looks like we’ll get a decent dusting,” Sasuke muses, watching it fall for a moment.

“...ne, Sasuke-kun?”

“Mm?”

“Would you l-like to get some ice cream?”

Eyes still skyward, his brow sharply furrows before looking to her as if she’s grown a second head. “...what?”

“Ice cream!”

“I...why would you want ice cream when it’s snowing? Aren’t you already cold?”

That earns a giggle. “What, like you don’t ever eat h-hot food when it’s hot?”

He just stares at her.

“I a-always have ice cream after yakiniku - it helps calm my tongue from the spices!”

“...you’re so strange.”

“It’s not that weird -”

“Yeah, it is.”

“W-well you don’t have to get any!”

“...I’ll get some sherbert. I don’t like sweet things, remember?”

“I know, but I just thought…” She trails off with a small shrug, hands in her coat pockets. “...a-and this time I can buy. Because I asked.”

Ah, so that’s what this is really about. Snorting in amusement, he doesn’t object a second time, just following as she beelines to the nearest shop. To his surprise, a few other people are in line, all who get incredulous looks from him. “...I can’t believe people think this is normal.”

“Shush,” she gently chides, stepping up to the counter. Her own order is a simple chocolate milkshake, which she struggles to consume through a straw with how thick it turns out. “Your turn!”

“...lime sherbert,” he eventually relents, receiving a small bowl of the stuff.

Seeing his gloved hands holding a frozen treat just makes him feel all the more ridiculous.

But Hinata happily works at her milkshake, so...he doesn’t complain. At least she’s happy, and she got to get him something, cheap though it was. Spooning the stuff into his mouth a small bit at a time, he aimlessly follows as she seems to wander back outside.

“Like it?”

“Sure.”

“See? It’s not so bad!”

“Now I’ll be cold on the outside and the inside.”

Mouth on her straw, her cheeks puff before lifting to counter, “I t-thought you said you were w-warm?” Was he lying about her knitting?

Giving her a glance with his uncovered eye, Sasuke snorts and ruffles her hair with a free hand, much to her dismay. “I’m joking. I can do that, you know.”

Huffing and puffing as she tries to tame her hair, she gives him a second pout. “...I-I know that. I just...didn’t want you to actually dislike it.”

“It’s fine, Hyūga. Stop worrying so much over a bit of ice cream.”

“You didn’t even g-get ice cream…”

“I told you, it’s too sweet…”

The pair fade down the street with their treats, gentle snowfall trailing in their wake.

                                                              .oOo.

     Random fluff is random. Not necessarily a sequel to anything in particular, since I write so many odds and ends in ALAS, anyway xD But I remembered having a piece where she made him some knitted stuff, so...wherever that was, consider this a followup, lol      Slowly but surely getting through things! Hopefully I'll have time tomorrow to reply to some comments. I'm now a whopping twenty days behind, BUT I'm feeling a bit better and less burnt out, so...here's hoping I'll plough through the rest and finish this baby up! Then it's fic vacation time for a while xD      Aaanyway, I'm gonna go get some sleep, since I finished a wee bit early for once lol -thanks for reading!