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[fastandcarlos]

Children Once Again : ̗̀➛ Lando Norris

summary: when you’re invited to the f1 as an ambassador the last face you expect to see is that of your childhood best friend

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liked by mclaren, landonorris and 792,057 others

ynusername: such an honour to be in monza to watch the grand prix, thank you so much to mclaren for the awesome hospitality 🧡

68,472 comments

username1: no way you finally for to go to a race!

mclaren: it was an honour to welcome you and host you at your very first f1 race 🧡

username2: hope you had the best time ever yn ❤️

kendalljenner: told you that you’d absolutely love it 😂

ynusername: @/kendalljenner I should’ve listened to you!

username3: ngl she seemed to be really close with lando when they were around the paddock together!

oscarpiastri: thank you for being such an awesome guest to have with us this weekend!

username4: papaya really suits you btw yn 😉

username5: and you got to go to monza too, that’s one of the best races on the circuit!!!

landonorris: can’t believe we finally got to see each other again, let’s not leave it so long next time 😂

ynusername: @/landonorris you’re still just as annoying as ever 😂

username6: wait wtf is going on here…did they already know each other??

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liked by oscarpiastri, kendalljenner and 837,018 others

ynusername: never in a million years did I think I’d get reunited with this guy, nearly 14 years later and we’re back together again 🥹

71,950 comments

username7: wait so they were friends at school and reconnected? omg that’s adorable

username8: see the f1 really does change lives 😂

georgerussell63: how you managed to put up with him growing up is crazy to me!

ynusername: @/georgerussell63 it was hard work at times 😂

username9: I can just imagine them causing so much trouble when they were younger!!

landonorris: 14 years to make up for but the rest of our lives to be back together causing mischief again!!

username10: look at how happy lando looks to be back with her again

mclaren: we’re so pleased we could unknowingly bring the two of you back together again 🧡

ynusername: @/mclaren I owe you guys so much for inviting me in the first place

username11: this is just the sweetest story ever 😭

oscarpiastri: at least I don’t have to listen to you guys reminiscing anymore 🙄

username12: so happy they got to reunite together 🥺

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liked by danielricciardo, ynusername and 2,038,173 others

landonorris: a dream weekend with my childhood best friend, still feeling just like big kids and like we’ve never not been each other’s lives 🥹

73,067 comments

username13: and you’re sure she’s just a friend are you???

alex_albon: these photos suggest you’ve had more than just a dream weekend to me

username14: you can just tell how fond of her lando still is 😭

danielricciardo: yeah, sure “just” friends 😉

username15: who is buying a friend flowers that are that nice!?

ynusername: you’re not gonna be able to get rid of me so easily this time around!

landonorris: @/ynusername good because I don’t want you to go anywhere anyway 🥺

username16: I don’t want these two to go their separate ways again 💔

maxverstappen1: you’ve known me since we were kids and yet you don’t hug me like that 🤨

landonorris: @/maxverstappen1 stop reading so much into things 🙄

username17: you’re not kidding anyone norris 😂

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liked by oscarpiastri, georgerussell63 and 782,607 others

ynusername: the first photo was lando when I surprised him at the race, now compare that to the last one after spending four hours with me 😂🧡

73,058 comments

username18: they couldn’t even stay away from each other for more than a week!!

maxverstappen1: I can so see why you two were the best of friends after meeting you 😂

username19: just look at how excited he is to see her 🥺

danielricciardo: it was a joy to meet you here and hear so many childhood stories of lando’s!!

username20: ofc cause only a friend would do something like this right??

landonorris: stop lying to people, I really was happy to have you here for the whole time 😂

ynusername: @/landonorris that’s why you banished me to the paddock for most of the afternoon 👀

username21: it breaks my heart knowing they spent so long apart when they seem to get on so well…

carlossainz55: it was fun embarrassing lando with you for the whole weekend!!!!

ynusername: @/carlossainz55 I had no idea he was still as stupid as he was back in school 🤦🏻‍♀️

username22: he loves spending time with you really yn 😂

oscarpiastri: I’m sure I saw him shed a tear when you told him you had to go

landonorris: @/oscarpiastri definitely tears of joy!!

username23: we really missed out on this friendship for so many years!

alex_albon: still sticking with the friendship storyline I see…

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ynusername just posted two stories

replies

alex_albon: if you went out with one you’d be a true passenger princess!

ynusername: when do you plan on letting this go??

username24: can you two just hurry up and date already?

georgerussell63: look at how handsome he is yn, you can’t deny it 😂

username25: put us out of our misery please and just announce it!

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danielricciardo: why are you two kids holding hands!?

username26: I still refuse to accept that you two are just friends!

username27: are you playing us all by pretending to just be friends?

charles_leclerc: when will you two just wake up and see it??

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liked by carlossainz55, oscarpiastri and 2,492,613 others

landonorris: don’t tell her but I secretly loved her back in school all those years ago, and I guess it’s fair to say I still love her just as much now ❤️

203,362 comments

username28: finally they’ve given us what we wanted for so long 👏🏻

alex_albon: can’t believe you tried to convince me that you two weren’t dating 🙄

oscarpiastri: couldn’t be happier for the two of you 🥰

username29: these two are the perfect reason as to why you should believe in destiny 😭

danielricciardo: this might just be the worst kept secret in the world!!

carlossainz55: i feel like I’ve watched a movie watching your romance unfold 🥺

username30: the fact he’s always been in love with her melts me 🫠

charles_leclerc: well aren’t you guys just the cutest 😭

username31: please don’t ever lose contact with each other again!

georgerussell63: you guys are perfect for each other, so pleased you managed to find one another again

username32: all these years and yet none of us knew that he actually only ever had eyes for her…

mclaren: congratulations to you both, secretly we’re taking all the credit for this 🧡

landonorris: @/mclaren you guys can absolutely take credit, thank you for inviting yn all those weeks ago!

username33: this is the kinda romance that everyone dreams of, only this time it actually came true 🧡

ynusername: it was only ever you 💞

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[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Death Wish 10

Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, violence/abuse and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Bucky Barnes

Part of the mob drabbles au

Summary: you’re desperate for a way out of your life and you ask a powerful man for help (plus!reader)

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

Photo Inspo

“Come on, doll,” Barnes takes your hand and leads you across the room. You follow as you will for the rest of your life; obediently. 

His grip is like a vice as he guides you through the hall and down the stairs. Silence meets you at the bottom as your sisters no doubt hear the descent. Yet he doesn’t let you go nor make a move to leave. Instead, he brings you into the front room. 

He squeezes your hand, pressing the large ring into your finger, and releases you. He steps forward as Kitty turns away from the window and Adrienne stands from the sofa. He commands any room he enters and you don’t think you’ll ever be used to that. 

“Sisters,” he declares brightly, “that is what I will call you from now on.” 

He goes first to Kitty and places a kiss on her cheek, then does the same to Adrienne. Each watch him in confusion. You stare blankly. 

“And you can call me brother and ask for anything and everything you need,” he says. 

“Sir,” Kitty moves towards your younger sister. 

“I ask discretion for the time being as I tie up a few loose ends,” Barnes explains. “And we get you all settled where you need to be.” 

Your sisters blink at you then each other. You can’t say it out loud. That makes it real. 

Barnes turns on his heel, “speaking of loose ends, I should go.” 

He comes towards you and takes your hand again. He raises it, certain to show off the glaring diamond, and kisses it. The gesture makes your blood run cold. It is a statement. It isn’t the same as when you kiss his ring, it isn’t deference, no it is a show of ownership. 

“Have a good night,” you say at last. 

He pulls back and lowers your hand. He grins, “it’s already spectacular, doll.” 

He lets you go and steps past you. You stand, stuck in place, as he leaves. The door opens and closes, the hinges jarring you into motion. You go to lock it behind him and Kitty calls your name. 

“What’s going on?” She appears in the doorway. 

You take a breath before you face her. You shrug. Adrienne scrambles around her and snatches your hand. 

“Oh my god, it’s huge.” 

“Stop,” you try to tug your hand back. 

“You’re marrying him?” Kitty’s voice deflates by the last syllable. “Why?” 

You look between them. You can tell one sliver of the truth. “To keep us safe.” 

“Us? We’ll be fine. Barnes says we get an inheritance, we get houses, money--” 

“And then what? It’s not enough to last forever,” you argue. “Even if we can find work, we’ll never make enough to keep that. How long did you work at the yogurt shop before daddy threatened to burn it down? And I have about a week’s experience down at the diner.” 

“We can start now--” 

“We can start now and never reach the finish line,” you insist. “Kitty, you know who daddy was. You sat there and watched what they did to that man today. This isn’t a life you walk away from, even if he’s dead.” 

Adrienne sniffles. She’s on the edge of tears again. 

“So, you do it over? Marry another one? Go through it again?” Kitty challenges. 

“He can make sure that neither of you have to--” 

“We don’t need you to be our martyr,” Kitty argues. 

“I’m not--” you seal your lips and sigh. You wish you could tell her. You wish you could say I shot that fuck and he deserved it because you know she would have loved to do the same thing. Yet, saying it out loud means admitting that you’re all trapped for that moment of vengeance. “Kitty, how much choice do you think he gave me?” 

She stares at you. She knows exactly how it works. There is no asking with these men. 

“We could all go. Disappear.” 

“And they wouldn’t find us? How far could we get, really?” 

“Not far,” Adrienne pipes in. “Kitty, would you rather daddy still be here?” 

Your older sister is silent as her jaw squares. 

“I could marry instead. Maybe not Barnes but someone else. It shouldn’t be you. I’m the oldest--” 

“It is me,” you say, “and it could be any one of us but this is how it is. It’s... not the worst.” 

“It’s not?” Kitty says. “That man stood and ordered another beaten to death. He didn’t flinch.” 

“I know,” you say. 

“No, you don’t know,” Kitty insists, “you can’t be sure that he isn’t like daddy.” 

She’s right. Barnes might have helped vanquish the monster but it can’t erase his own misdeeds. Yet, you asked for all of this. You went there in the middle of the night and sold your soul. You could excuse yourself with naivete, but you deserve more to be branded by it. 

“If it keeps you two from men like daddy--” 

“Stop,” Kitty grabs you by the shoulders. “None of us deserve it.” 

“You stop,” you wrap your fingers calmly around her forearms and peel her hold off of you. “Should I go hand that man his ring back or do you want do it for me?” 

She untangles her wrists from your grasp and recoils. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes up against the threat of tears. She stamps her foot in frustration. 

“You tell me,” she points her finger at you. You’re almost stunned by the fire in her voice and face. Kitty is the sweet one, she’s gentle, but she has your mother’s quiet strength. “You tell me if he ever puts a bruise on you. You fucking tell me.” 

“Kitty,” you murmur. 

Adrienne covers her mouth and watches, swept up in the fraught emotion of it all. 

“No, because I spent a lifetime watching you two cry over that beast we called a father,” she snarls. “I will not waste the rest of my life doing the same. I thought—I thought we were free. I wanted us to be free.” She curls her lip and exhales heavily. “So, you will not lie to me again. And I will know. I will see right through him so you don’t even try to cover it up. One bruise...” she wags her finger then throw up both her hands with a frustrated growl. “I sound like him.” She turns and drags her feet to the stairs. She sits on one and hangs her head. “I sound like daddy. I’m just so... tired.” 

You look at Adrienne and reach for her. She gives you her hand. You bring her over to Kitty and touch your elder sister’s shoulder. She looks up through sparkling eyes. 

“You will know. We will all know. We are sisters and this doesn’t change that,” you say. “We stick together, no matter what.” 

“Oh, we will,” Kitty insists, “I will be at your damn house every day and I will look at that man and I will see all the cracks. Trust me you. He will not take you from us.” 

“Kitty, Ade,” you look from one to the other, “no one can take us from each other. If daddy did one thing, it was making sure of that.” 

[twstfanblog]

*~Period Drama~* Thursday

A/N: Guess this one won XD Very excited, the end is near for this series and then I can start to hyper-focus on ANOTHER SERIES. Please tell me if you want to be tagged for any of my series! Pairings: Malleus/Jamil/Azul/Yuu poly WordCount: 7.1K Warnings: Allusions to assault briefly, She/They OC Pronouns

@twistedcece @deltrea @krenenbaker @koebishrimpuwu @cat100200 @emyluwinter @obsessionswithfandoms @ady-hilborn @lucid-stories @girl-nahh-two @itz-hydrodeptus-foxy7 @chyluna @riddlesimps @death-the-jo @a-twistedheartslonging @qixlin @chaosistheonlyway @welcome-to-my-horde @abell2029cluster @kirans-wonderland @coffee-or-hot-cocoa @the-ace-reader @iamsoconfusedallofthetime @chroniccorvus @marvelous-maxi @prolonged-eyecontact @lozplayer @jabberwocky-warrior @thateldribitch @bun-lapin @mel1rose @ladyraeka @ladyzsgolla @kimdourden @noncreativepage-blog @girl-nahh-two @shironakuronatasa @colombia-chan @roseapov @anunholyabomination @koebi-channnn

Start, Part 2 (Octavinelle), Part 3 (Heartslabyul), Part 4 (Savanaclaw), Part 4.5 (Diasomnia pt1), Part 5 (Diasomnia pt2), Part 6 (Pomfiore), Part 7 (Here)

The Pomefiore trio didn't stay the night. Vil commented that they had already skipped their afternoon classes and he wouldn't allow them all to get more off routine by spending the night. Thankfully, Vil helped Yuu properly twist and wrap their hair with Rook producing a silk scarf from seemingly nowhere before they left.

Hours later, Crewel arrived with even more period panties in his possession along with their dinner. He asked multiple questions; if the seams were too tight, if the fabric felt uncomfortable, if anything had leaked. Delighted that all seemed proper, Crewel launched into how he had never thought of the need for such a product. But he admitted that such areas on the body had fluid leaking from them at some point. It'd only make sense that if it was made they'd at least look fashionable.

Crewel stated that he would speak to his aunt, the current design head of his family's fashion house, about the underwear and if she saw a market for it.

“If so, I will make sure you get a cut. Since you were the one to insight such a need…”

He left them a small pamphlet with info on taking care of their new underwear before leaving for the night, hugging them tightly and patting them on the head.

Another hour later, Malleus and Lilia had returned to the house. Malleus was pouting heavily and crawled into the nest to hold them with no word. Lilia sighed, explaining that Malleus spent the entire school day keeping Jamil and Azul trapped in the Mostro Lounge back office. The prince tried his best but Lilia and Jamil remained firm on not allowing Malleus to change their prior agreement. Azul proved to be the weakest link in half-siding with Malleus. While he didn't fully agree with Malleus impregnating Yuu as soon as possible, he did state that something had to be done about their periods in the long term.

‘They were on campus for no more than four hours; the smell of blood still lingers in places…’

Yuu laughed, turning in Malleus’s hold to hug him back, “Do you still smell blood now?”

“...” Malleus’s eyes widen, “Now that you ask, no. Has your ailment ceased?”

“Nope. Still bleeding, but…” Yuu lifted their night dress, showing the brightly patterned underwear before lowering their gown, “Crewel got me cute new underwear to contain my biohazard.”

Lilia sighed, sitting beside the couple in the nest, “Well, that's good at least. Though didn't you say your normal cycle only lasts four days? Shouldn't it have eased by now?”

“I mean…it should. But it also wasn't normal for me to not get it for nearly half a year. Best I can do right now is play it by ear”

Malleus pouts, eyes glaring at the wall as though it could fix anything and simply refuses to help, “I dislike this, I dislike this greatly.”

“Aw…” Yuu tilted their head back, pressing a kiss to Malleus’s jawline before snuggling back into his embrace, “I hate it too. Wanna watch a movie with me?”

“...It would be an upsetting one, wouldn’t it?”

“Most of my favorite movies upset you guys. But, no, it shouldn't.” Yuu clicked at their laptop playing up their Netflix, “It's called ‘Damsel’. It's got a dragon in it-”

“Does the dragon die?” Lilia quickly asked, eyeing the screen in distrust. Yuu had claimed many times they would love a movie, only to then show them deeply distressing media.

“No, the dragon lives and even gets his just revenge-”

Malleus looks at the screen with a suspicious eye, “Does a woman die within the first few moments of this film?” Malleus had watched many movies with Yuu, and every time they insisted he would love a movie a woman would be dead within the first few minutes of the film.

Yuu playfully slapped their hand over Malleus’s mouth, pressing play on the video, “It's for the plot, now shush, and watch the damn movie.”

Malleus was dragged out of the nest by Lilia early in the morning, forced to gaze at Yuu’s equally upset self before being marched back to Diasomnia. Seems part of Malleus’s punishment for kidnapping and detaining Azul and Jamil was that he wasn't allowed more than eight hours of supervised ‘Yuu Time’. So once those hours were up Lilia was manhandling a nearly seven-foot pouting dragon out of a sleeping Yuu's embrace and out of Ramshackle.

Yuu sighed, starfishing in the nest with a severe pout. Most of their period symptoms had eased, though they were still bleeding and bloated. The number of techniques Vil and Rook had given them helped what little of their cramps were left without the need for pain medication. So now all they were left with was an intense sense of boredom.

After the sun had started to peak through the windows, Yuu decided they might as well get started on their extensive chores list. One could only put off washing dishes for so long…But, now, staring into the sink filled with dishes, Yuu wondered if they could…pretend they didn't see them. Each side had dishes neglected and stacked neatly against the porcelain. Plates, pots, and pans from the past week untouched and unsoaked. Looking around the room only made their body cry out more to go back to the nest and sleep. Floyd cooking was already a coin toss on how much of a mess he left behind and they lost. But it didn't help at all that Lilia had been in the kitchen only a few days ago as well. Scraps of food burnt and crumbled on the floor that was long overdue to be swept.

More than likely the only reason the dishes were in the sink was because Vil had put them there as a form of passive-aggressively telling them to wash them.

While they were wondering if they could put their cutting board over the sink to block out the image, knocks rang out downstairs, pelted in a constant rhythmic beat. Yuu walked from the kitchen, smiling as they saw a flash of white, burgundy, and gold from the window beside the front door. They wait, opening the door on an offbeat to Kalim’s surprised expression making the Scarabia second-year whine.

“Yuu! I had a really good beat going…”

“Hello to you too, Kalim. What do I owe this visit?”

Kalim smiled, resting his hands on his hips when he remembered why he was there, “Well, me and Jamil-”

“Jamil's here?”

Kalim laughed, not at all offended when Yuu lightly shoved him out of the doorway to look down the path. Sure enough, the vice warden was walking up the stone steps, looking through a large duffle bag slung over his shoulder and wheeling a rolling cart filled with cleaning supplies behind him with the other.

Smiling, Yuu quickly unwrapped her hair to allow the curls to seductively frame her face and wave, “Hi, Jamil~! Let me help you bring that stuff in-”

Yuu had barely placed their foot outside of the house's threshold when Jamil snapped his eyes toward them. Glaring hard enough that a flicker of red seemed to spawn in his pupils before he yelled, “Get back in the fucking house!”

“Okay. Damn.”

Yuu and Kalim both scurried into the house, each wearing a mildly fearful expression but waiting patiently for Jamil to walk inside like chastised children.

Once through the doorway Jamil closed and locked the door, situating his cart against the entryway wall. He pulled Yuu closer by the hip, his other hand resting gently on the back of their neck as he pressed his lips against theirs. The kiss lasted only a few seconds before he pulled away, giving their lips a final peck at the corner before wrapping both arms around them in an embrace. Yuu hummed, returning the affectionate hold before allowing Jamil to pull away.

Yuu smiled, tilting their head in question, “What's got you all worked up? That was a ‘Put that shit back’ kinda yell…”

“The last time you left this house, you bled all over the campus and Leona-san nearly died.”

“I didn't bleed anywhere and what the fuck does my bleeding pussy have to do with Leona dying!? He was fine the last I saw him!”

Jamil huffed, pressing one last kiss to Yuu's temple before collecting his cleaning cart, “I’m sure Leona-san would blame you for the fact he had to fight Malleus to keep him from storming Ramshackle.”

Yuu's face pinched, a hybrid expression of annoyance and confusion on their face. Turning to Kalim they gestured as though he'd have the answer they were seeking, “When was this!?”

Kalim laughed, shrugging his shoulders, “Well, there was that massive storm on Monday. A tree got tossed into the library.”

Yuu frowned, folding their arms and rolling their eyes, “I'm not taking responsibility for that. All I did was bleed and bitch. I didn't attempt murder even once Monday!”

“Uh-huh, sure hayati. Go sit with Kalim for a few hours while I go clean up.”

Jamil knew his datemate; habitually, emotionally, and physically. Every mannerism filed away in his head, be it for his own sake of mind or just because he found their quirks cute. Jamil knew in their current state of constant pain, Yuu was not doing upkeep at their normal pace. And while a part of him groaned in annoyance — one of the few days off from school he allowed himself and he's going to spend it cleaning his datmate's dumpster fire of a house — he knew that Yuu's health and mood would only improve once chores were done.

Yuu frowns even harder, moving to grab Jamil's cart and pull the sophomore back, “Wha-no! Jamil, you don't need to do my chores for me. I just gotta...suck it up and do them…and I will…at some point. But-!”

“No, buts, hayati.” Jamil yanks the cart from Yuu, cupping their cheek and caressing it with a soft smile. He looked into their eyes, snake charmer not even needed as he cooed, “Let me take care of you, okay, baby?”

Yuu instantly yielded, giggling and twirling a strand of their curly hair, “Ehehehehehe, okay Jamil~...”

Seeing his datemate properly subdued, Jamil quickly dropped his flirty tone and moved to the kitchen, “Good. Kalim, look after them for me.”

“You can count on me, Jamil!” Kalim was already guiding a still giggling Yuu toward the lounge at the back of the house with a gentle push to their shoulders.

Kalim had adored the nest instantly, flopping into the cushions like it was his own bed. He wanted to add to it, making it even bigger with some fine patterned blankets back in Scarabia. Maybe a few more pillows-

Yuu, finally free from the effects of Jamil's easy-going smile and hooded eyes, had laughed and quickly stopped the housewarden from touching the nest in an effort to change it. Stating that Malleus had built it just for them and they really liked how it looked as is. While he pouted, he yielded to Yuu’s desires, only after she had promised to make a pillow fort in Scarabia once they were all better. 

While cozy in the nest, Kalim had produced a sleeve of artisan crackers that he offered to feed them. Yuu agreed, though confused on why Kalim wanted to feed them. But quickly understood as the second-year smiled and held a cracker up, “Pspspspspspsps-”

“KALIM-”

Now lounging cozy in the nest, the sleeve of crackers slowly disappearing between them. Chatting contently with the idea of talking until Jamil called them for lunch. Chats that became on and off in topic as Kalim had locked eyes with a faded smear of blood on one of the towels under his leg. He would answer Yuu's questions after a second of staring at the smudged, rusty stain in total focus. Before long, he couldn't take the vision of it, his own mind working against him. Images of blood splatters on finely threaded sheets, children wailing in terror as innocent mothers and siblings lay in the deep red puddles during what should have been joyous celebrations. Even the more horrifying scenarios of the Viper family quickly disposing of stained bedding, older sisters and younger moms being consoled as they cried in the early mornings. Suddenly Kalim reached forward, grasping onto Yuu's hand and holding it tightly to his chest.

Kalim smiled, an edge of something uncharacteristically serious clinging to the corners, “Yuu, can I be honest?”

“Um…Yeah? Go for it, Kalim.”

“I've got a lot of moms. Lots of siblings too, so there are a lot of people in my house all the time. And…” Kalim’s grip on their hand tightens, his smile falling a bit as his eyes cast downward, “A lot of…a lot of bad stuff happens at my house sometimes. Stuff that shouldn't ever happen…so…you can tell me, ya know? I can take it.”

“...Tell you what?”

Kalim looks back up, crimson eyes cold and more determined than Yuu had ever seen them, “Yuu, if someone hurt you, you can tell me. No matter who you say did it, I'll believe you and take care of it.” Kalim placed one hand against their shoulder, the other squeezing their joint palms to his heart, “You're like a sister to me. You make Jamil happy and that's the most wonderful thing I could ever ask of a friend of mine. If someone did something to you and you lied for whatever reason, you can tell me the truth now and I'll believe you no matter what.” 

…

Yuu couldn't stop the snort they made, head tilting down as they strained against a laugh. Nothing Kalim said was funny, it was purely a moment of stunned reaction rather than comedy. Last Saturday seemed so long ago, the cloud of confusion and panic as their friends all came to the conclusion they had been assaulted, the horror they all felt and the pure devastation a few of them displayed. Each of them clearly ready and willing to maim whoever they pointed a finger at. It was…strangely heartwarming.

Covering their mouth, they moved their hand from Kalim’s hold to tug him closer into a hug, “No one hurt me, I swear. But, thank you for being so willing to believe me no matter what. It makes me feel…safe.”

Kalim hugs back just as tight, taking a deep breath before letting out a shuddering sigh. Smiling, he nuzzled into Yuu's shoulder before pulling away, “That's a relief…but…” his expression turns concerned, eyes drifting downward, “Are you…just leaking blood from down there?”

“Yep…”

“...” Kalim leaned away, his arms getting pressed between his legs and sympathy pains slowly crept into his gut as he grimaced, “I can't catch it right?”

Yuu falls over in the nest, cackling loudly while Kalim kept looking worried, “Kalim. I swear to you, your pussy isn't going to spontaneously start peeling and juicing it. And if it does, that's a concern. Get that checked out, babes.”

“Well, you should get checked out too then! Let me bring one of my doctors to the school, they won't say a word about how weird your body is and we can make sure you're healthy!”

“The fuck-How weird my body is? Fuck you.” Yuu snicked, rolling on the nest to tilt their head back to smile up to Kalim, “No. I'm going to ignore every ailment my body develops until it's too late like the born American I am.”

“Yuu, that's concerning!”

Kalim wanted a snack, a snack he begged her to let him make himself. The heir had stated he was getting better in the kitchen compared to the first few cooking lessons Yuu and Jamil had given him. Kalim had proudly bragged that Jamil had even allowed him to use the stove unattended now.

(Yuu knew from Jamil’s past venting it was only to watch boiling water, but it was using the stove…)

The two walked into the kitchen, noticing the sweet scent of grapefruit in the halls. A guilty feeling settled in Yuu’s stomach after seeing how clean their kitchen was in the single hour they and Kalim had sat and chatted in the lounge. The dishes were all washed, the sink and cabinets wiped down of every sauce splatter Yuu had long neglected. The floor was swept to perfection and a part of Yuu hoped that the fresh fruit adjacent smell was only the simmer pot and not a freshly mopped floor. Looking into the single pot on the stove, Kalim and Yuu gave pleased hums as they took in the scent of sliced grapefruits, vanilla beans, and sprigs of fresh thyme. 

With the instructions of being careful should a fairy be sleeping in any of the pots or in the oven, Yuu let the Scarabia warden have free reign of their kitchen while they went searching for their boyfriend. 

The muted sound of their washer knocking against the wall led them toward the laundry room.

The Ramshackle laundry room was one of the few rooms that weren’t locked but simply hidden from view. The Tweels had been the ones to find it during Azul’s brief ownership of the building. A false wall that could unlatched and slid to the side to show a certified massive-sized matching washer and dryer set, a wall of cabinets and a wooden topped counter island. Jade had cleaned up the room a bit as an ‘apology’ for giving them such a hard time during the duration of their contract. Floyd had stated he wasn’t sorry but to call him if they ever used the laundry powder found in the room; apparently it had been discontinued years ago for safety reasons.

Dubious washing powder aside, the laundry room was weirdly whimsical. Over the years, a bush had managed to break a window to grow throughout the room making a living ivy wall all along one side of the space. The vines had grown strong enough over time to act as a crisscross of clothing lines. Walking into the room, Yuu watched Jamil stare in complete focus at a towel in his hand standing at the island. The duffle bag was opened on the counter, a few jars and bottles with handwritten labels pulled from it and one opened in Jamil’s free hand. He watched whatever the mixture was doing before moving the towel under the running water of the built-in sink.

Yuu knocked on the doorway, smiling when Jamil looked up from his task, “What ya doing?”

“Why are you here? Go entertain Kalim.”

“You are so mean to me. Just for that, I'm gonna bother you and love you and-”

Jamil sighed, holding up the towel in his hands, “Hayati, please. I'm trying to spot-check things you bled on.”

Yuu frowned, walking over and leaning against the counter to stare at Jamil's concentrated face, “You can do that and let me kiss you on the mouth…”

“Normally, I'd love to make out with you while waiting for laundry to run its cycle, but I need to focus. Blood is easy for me to get out of things at this point. But blood and whatever else is coming out of you changes how the detergents react.” The first few towels with corroded holes from too strong a solution mix backing up his claims…

Pouting, Yuu bumped their hip against Jamil's. They repeated the motion until the sophomore finally yielded and reached for their hand, holding it gently as a blush dusted onto his cheeks. Smiling, Yuu leaned their head against Jamil's shoulder muttering under their breath, “Thank you.”

“Just let me work in peace…”

Once their load of pre-period clothing was in the dryer, Jamil had remarked that their period blood was easier to remove than normal blood spills surprisingly enough. And that he would replace the few towels the protein dissolvant had eaten though. Then he demanded they bring him every last article they had bled on. The longer they remained untreated, the harder the stains would be to remove.

Jamil had already started to separate the towels by dark and lights, taking a moment to gently shove Yuu away from his side, “Go back to the lounge with Kalim; I’ve got this handled.”

“Oh, Kalim’s in the kitchen-”

“He’s what-”

“It’s fine! He just wanted a snack-”

“The stove is on-”

“Jamil.” Yuu had managed to keep the second-year from rushing out of the room, tugging him back by the arm and smiling at his panicked expression, “Kalim is a seventeen-year-old boy. He can be trusted to work a stove. Remember? How you're both trying to be less codependent? How Kalim can manage to make himself a snack without you having to drop everything to make it for him?”

“...” The pout Jamil turns away to hide was foul, almost a sneer if Yuu could have looked at it closer. He was quiet for a few more moments before sighing, “Fine…but if I smell smoke-.”

“He'll be fine.” Please don't let that fucking jinx anything…

Two sets of hands were better than one. A simple fact Yuu kept repeating until Jamil yielded again to their whims. Now they followed him around the house, helping to collect any stray articles that had their period blood on them. Jamil groaned lightly as he looked at the nest. He was aware every couch cushion was used to construct it, along with nearly every last clean pillow, towel, and bedding. But, he wouldn't be able to check if anything was dirty until the nest went away. A feat he wasn't going to perform himself since both Yuu and Malleus were fond of the structure.

So he picked the next best location of Yuu’s bedroom. A mistake on many parts, but he honestly expected no less…

He stared into the room, Yuu sheepishly standing beside him and refusing to look even vaguely in his direction. Jamil wasn't sure if the room was an absolute mess when the group had stormed the area on Saturday, but he could see it was the aforementioned dumpster fire he was expecting the rest of the house to be. Clothing was everywhere, a pair of patterned pj shorts on the ground with a darkened blood stain on the crotch, equally blood-spotted towels in a pile and bedding swirled around as though someone fought their way out. There were several empty bowls, snack wrappers, and juice bottles littering every surface, nearly twelve bottles were all on a single end table.

Jamil turned to Yuu, sighing deeply when they still refused to meet his eyes, “I'm not mad-”

“Yes, you are.”

“You're right, I'm furious. How do you let it get so bad?”

“In my defense…I haven’t been up here for a few days-”

“Yuu, I bought you that bottle of juice.” Jamil pointed to the bedside table, eyes locked on a half-empty bottle of a limited-edition flavor that both Kalim and Yuu had begged him to let them try, “That bottle has been here at least a week.”

“Look-”

“I am. That’s why I’m upset.”

“Let’s just clean this up and you can scold me later. Help me strip the bed.”

Jamil grumbled, looking at the floor and making a mental note to bring his cart upstairs to mop Yuu’s bedroom once she was distracted with Kalim again. While Yuu started to remove the numerous bottles from the side tables, Jamil grabbed the edge of a blanket and pulled it off the bed only to jump at the loud thud that followed. Both looked at the floor under the blanket Jamil had In his hands.

A jug. A half-full jug of bright blue liquid with a label consisting of cartoon-styled fruit and waves.

“...” Jamil grabbed Yuu before she could scurry away from him. Pointing at the juice container he tilted his head with a smile, “What is this? Because it surely can't be an entire gallon of juice. In your bed. Because that'd be insane, wouldn't it?”

“...I mean it's mostly empty-”

“Yuu.”

“It's not that bad! I get thirsty at night and sometimes I don't want to go all the way downstairs for a glass of water…”

Jamil jerkingly gestured to the ensuite bathroom, no more than four feet away from where they were both standing.

“Bathroom water is good, but kitchen sink water hits different, you know?”

“If I didn't love you…”

Jamil tried to keep quiet as they both stripped the bed. With every blanket and pillow removed, more and more items were revealed; half-eaten bags of chips, opened containers of cookies, more select bottles of juice and soda. The real kicker was the empty containers, each closed tightly to not let crumbs out onto the sheets.

Pulling out another package of cookies, Jamil cast a withering glare at Yuu, “Please tell me you aren’t teaching Kalim how to do this…”

Yuu laughed, waving off their boyfriend’s concern, “Oh, no. Bedrotting is way too advanced for him. He’d get crumbs everywhere just putting a plate on his bed.”

“At least we’re in agreement there…” He finally pulled the sheet off the bed, clicking his tongue at seeing his worst expectation. The number of towels and blankets still allowed the blood to reach the mattress, barely staining the cotton fabric top a dull red, but still visible, “Damn…How much do you bleed during this? You’ve been taking the iron supplements, right?”

“Yeah…” Yuu walked over, frowning at seeing they had stained their mattress, “I’ll be honest, I barely know what the normal amount to bleed is. It’s also lasting longer than normal though…”

“Hmm…” Jamil placed the folded sheet on the bed, moving to press his hands against Yuu’s face and neck as a means to check them over, “I’m only noticing it now, but you’re a little bloated. Is that part of it? Do you know how long it lasts? Bloating could be a sign of something else being wrong…”

Yuu smiles, placing their hands over Jamil’s and pulling them away, “Yes, the bloating is part of it. I’ll be fine once this hell week is over. I'm used to this only lasting like four days. The whole week is just cruel and unusual…”

“Four days?”

“Jesus. You said that like when I told you I’ve eaten belladonna berries as a child. The fuck are periods like here?”

“A lot less bloody for one…And not as long. Menses generally isn’t normal unless it’s after birth, and even then it’s fairly rare if done in a comfortable medical setting.”

“Is the word actually menses? Because that’s hilarious. The medical name for a period is called menstruation.”

“...‘Menses’ is the term for vaginal bleeding and discharge. The process is commonly known as ‘The Refresh’. Thinking it over it’s decently similar; the food cravings, agitated moods, lethargy. However, The Refresh lasts, at most, two days. Any longer than that and it’s a medical concern. I’ve never heard of the process being painful either…” Growing up with a younger sister and a household that had a revolving door of pregnant women made him more knowledgeable than he realized. 

“...” Yuu bit her lip, smiling and nodding their head as a mask to the spike of fury that coursed through them, “I will find out how to cast endometriosis and destroy nations…”

“What the fuck is endometriosis?”

“Something that’ll take out half you fuckers, but whatever.” Yuu sighed, flopping down onto the bare bed and letting themselves metaphorically puddle into the slab.

Jamil sat beside them on the mattress, running his hand along their back and massaging in small intervals, “The pain can get that bad…? How do you feel now? You don’t have it right, endometriosis? Or is it a phase of this?”

“Stop asking me questions, you’re worse than Riddle…” Yuu moved their face from the cotton top of the mattress, looking from the corner of their eyes at Jamil, “I don’t think I have it…cramps are just really bad but not like…to the point of ‘I need hospital attention bad’, I think…Periods are just sucky and I hate it.”

“Are there other ways to help? You aren't taking any more pain potions, right? You've been taking…a lot in a small amount of time…”

Yuu hums, reaching a hand to play with the end of Jamil's braid, “I mean…orgasms help with pain relief? But, Vil taught me a bunch of other stuff yesterday to help with the cramps. Plus just a nice soak in warm water does wonders…Jamil?”

“...” Shrugging his shoulders, Jamil slipped off the bed, “Eh, it's just blood.”

Yuu threw a questioning glance over their shoulder, “Wha-Jamil!?” She shrieked, being flipped onto her back. Raising up on her elbows, she sees Jamil kneeling between her now-opened legs.

The second-year smirks, his hands already massaging the tops of her thighs, “I'm down here all the time anyway. Might as well give you some relief.”

She sputters, smiling and trying to flip back over and cross her legs, “Oh, my god. You didn't even ask-” another tug pulls her closer to him and moving her hips over the edge of the bed and letting him kiss against their pelvic, “JAMIL!”

“Kalim, are you still in the kitchen? What have you been-...” Yuu froze in the archway of the kitchen, looking at the now-dressed small square table pushed against the wall.

Perking up from the freezer door, Kalim smiled, “Oh, hi Yuu! I just finished making the brownie ice cream sandwiches, but everything else is ready for lunch. Where's Jamil?”

“Washing his face. Kalim, did you order this food?” They pointed at the table, bewildered at the spread.

Sitting at the center of the table was one of their glass serving pitchers filled with juice, a platter of chicken tenders, and two smaller serving bowls of what looked to be mixed vegetables and mashed potatoes. There were placemats and proper dishware all set for three people. Yuu even noticed beside the pitcher was a napkin sloppily folded to look like a candle.

He frowns, folding his arms, “No? I made it! Since Jamil was so busy cleaning, I thought I would help out by making us lunch.” He smiled, closing his eyes with an expression that spoke of how proud he was of himself, “I made us girl dinner for lunch all on my own!”

Yuu opened their mouth, poised to correct the housewarden only for Jamil to appear behind her.

Jamil was gently yet insistently pushing Yuu away from the doorway, “You know I don't like you being in the kitchen while I cook.”

“You don't like anyone being in the kitchen when you cook. But, Jamil, look! Kalim made things…”

Looking at the table in silence, Jamil surveyed the dishes before turning to Kalim with a look of disappointment, “You know you're not supposed to open doors to let people inside.”

“I? I didn't order this? I made it!”

Jamil pointed to the table, brows furrowed and looking far too much like a frustrated mother, “You expect me to believe you made chicken tenders, by hand?”

Kalim opened his mouth but quickly closed it, looking to the side sheepishly, “I…ok, I didn't do that.” he gestured to the large fridge he was still standing by, “But Yuu had a bag of chicken tenders in her freezer that I put in the air fryer. I got the vegetables from a can and heated them up. And, I put three tablespoons of butter and garlic salt to taste in the instant potatoes.”

Yuu flitted their hands like an excited mother, smiling before pressing against Jamil to make sure he was listening to Kalim, “Tell him about the brownies. You said something about brownies.”

“Oh! Yeah. You had a container of brownies on your snack cart that were going out of date. So I was extra careful and cut them to make sandwiches with some ice cream I found.”

Kalim smiled, hands on his hips as he took his stance in pride again, “I made girl dinner all myself.”

“You didn't even make girl dinner, you just made dinner. Kalim! You cooked! All on your own!” Yuu rushed over, arms wrapping around his waist and lifting him up to spin him in the hug, “You cooked! I'm so proud of you!”

Laughing loudly, hugging Yuu back and nuzzling his head against her’s. He looks over, still smiling wide only to freeze and have his smile drop at seeing his friend’s expression, “...Jamil?”

The second Scarabia student was silent, staring at the table filled with food with a blank expression. His eyes seemed to scan every last dish on the table trying to find anything wrong. Possibly a visible flaw in the food or something to point to poisoning or poor preparation.

“...” Setting Kalim back down Yuu pats Jamil's chest, rolling her eyes and trying to help him to the table to sit, “He's just having a baby mental breakdown. Once he snaps out of it, he'll be just as proud. Let's eat!”

Jamil snapped back the second he bit into one of the tenders. He grabbed the platter, taking it back to the air fryer and placed half of them inside, “You put all of these in at once didn't you?”

“Yes? I put a lot in to make sure we'd have plenty to share!”

“Kalim, these weren't cooked properly…”

“Ah…My bad.”

Besides the small threat of salmonella poisoning, the rest of the day went peacefully. Both Yuu and Kalim tagged along as Jamil found more places to clean. They had managed to annoy him enough before they had even started the second load of laundry, tossing clothing and having a faux fashion show instead of folding, like Jamil had asked of them. So they were banished back to the lounge.

Jamil appeared again hours later, sighing and saying that all of Yuu's laundry was washed, dried, folded, and placed in their appropriate areas. He then plopped face-first into the nest, only moving enough to wrap an arm around Yuu's waist and groan that they were too messy to live alone. Prompting Kalim to once again offer to permanently house them not only in Scarabia, but his family's estate. An idea that was instantly vetoed on different fronts by the couple.

As the trio were just thinking of what to make for actual dinner, the front door opened. Lilia and Malleus entered the lounge, each pleasantly surprised to see their respective favorite Scarabia boy in the nest with Yuu.

Lilia lifted up a large carry bag with the logo of the Mostro Lounge, a smile on his face, “Good thing Floyd was in such a good mood today, he gave us extra on our order.”

Malleus was already in the nest, sharing a kiss with Yuu before tucking hair behind Jamil's ear to kiss his cheek, “Would you like to stay for dinner?”

Jamil didn't look up, but the tips of his ears had slowly turned red the second Malleus’s fingertips grazed across his cheek. Of any of them, he had yet to get used to Malleus’s almost spontaneous bouts of affection. He turned his head more into Yuu's thigh, praying it could hide the rosy tint of his cheeks, “We didn't have dinner plans yet, so…I don't see why not…”

Even after dinner, neither Scarabia boy was allowed to leave. The thought never crossed Kalim’s mind and Jamil was trapped under Malleus’s arm, the horned fae being more affectionate as an apology for threatening him on Monday. Lying between his two warmer-blooded lovers, arms locked around their waists to hold them close in a cuddle. Kalim and Lilia were crowded close, the two vibing to the low music from Kalim’s phone and drifting off to sleep.

Yuu hummed, nuzzling into Malleus’s chest, “This is nice…we should invite Azul to cuddle with us.”

Jamil reaches a hand up, eyes still closed as he presses a finger to Yuu's lips in a silent motion to be quiet, “Let's not traumatize him any more than he has been…”

Malleus frowns at Jamil, pouting as Lilia snickers, “I already apologized for scaring you both during our talk yesterday and Monday.”

“Also, why is me asking him to come cuddle a cause for fear?”

Opening his eyes, sighing and lifting his head from Malleus’s chest to raise an eyebrow, “You've noticed how he's almost going out his way to avoid being around you?”

Yuu shrugged, pouting and pressing her cheek harder against Malleus, “I just thought he was busy…”

Malleus looked to the side, remembering how squeamish and withdrawn the Octavinelle student was when discussing Yuu's period, “He was very…frightened the last I saw him. Your period seems to be a factor of intimidation for him.”

“Female caecilians are aggressive during mating season, enough so that they could potentially kill the male trying to mate with them.” Jamil groaned, rolling his eyes remembering the day's long talk he was magically spawned into, “It was why he nearly agreed with Malleus to jump-start your pregnancy vow…”

“I still believe I'm justified in my stance. Azul would also have nothing to fear if Yuu was already pregnant.”

“Malleus, we’ve talked about this, my period can still happen if I’m pregnant-”

Jamil snapped to glare at Yuu, “I’m sorry, what-”

 Yuu smiled, a hand moving to pat Jamil’s face to ‘calm’ him, “Anyway, since we’re talking about stuff that no one wants to talk about, what’s this about you almost killing Leona?”

“...” Malleus blinked, quirking his lip as he looked off to the side, clearly showing his disinterest, “Kingscholar was…fine the last I saw him.”

“And when was that?”

“A few…days ago?”

Jamil’s hard stare shifted to Malleus, “Was that a question?”

“I don’t tend to think much, of Kingscholar.”

Yuu snickered, “Don’t you mean about?”

“I don’t see the difference.”

[becausebuckley]

michelle's buddie fic recs: week 45!

what a week... i'm greatly enjoying all of the post-8x06 buddie fic (many more recs to come!) and took some time to revisit old favourites, which can be found in previous rec lists. enjoy!

this is a mix of fics with all ratings, so some include NSFW content. please take a look at both the ratings and the fic tags before reading! some might also contain spoilers for season 8.

if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!

all that we need | not1_2write | 26.4k | M

When Buck buys a Powerball lottery ticket he doesn't think much beyond his need for change to air up his tire. He forgets all about the ticket until word spreads that the winning ticket was sold in LA and hasn't been claimed yet and pretty much dismisses it. After all, there's no way he won the lottery. Turns out no, he really did win the Powerball, to the tune of 295 million dollars and just in time for Christmas. He's going to make sure the 118 has the best Christmas of their lives. And just maybe he'll have a good one too. idk about all of you but i do dream about winning the lottery regularly (way too often for someone who's never bought a ticket, that's for sure). this is such a lovely look at what buck would do with a whole lot of money <3

i take this magnetic force of a man | playinginthunderstorms/@playinginthunderstorms | 9k | M

Turns out, he isn’t actually afraid of commitment. He’s just afraid of committing to the wrong thing, or the wrong person. Ana, obviously, had been a mistake, because he hadn’t been ready, and he’d put other people’s expectations above his own wants and needs. With Marisol, he’s done the same thing. Moved too fast, doing what he thinks is the right thing according to who? His parents? For Chris’s benefit? Again, pushing past his own comfort, discarding any doubt because it doesn’t fit like… Like Buck. blanket rec for one of my favourite authors who has been posting incredible fics lately!! this one in particular is so beautifully written and so romantic and just so very buddie <3

if i need to rearrange my particules i will for you | thelikesofus/@thelikesofus | 7.9k | GA

Eddie catches a cold and Buck takes care of him while having a minor, non-platonic emotional crisis. this is definitely influenced by the fact that i've been ill myself but wow truly nothing hits as hard as buddie taking care of each other when one of them isn't feeling well. the bed sharing in this is so good <3

let me | facewithoutheart/@facewithoutheart | 1.6k | T

Eddie doesn't think he needs romance. Buck, respectfully, disagrees. AKA the fic where Buck picks Eddie up and kisses him breathless against a wall. and buck is so right for doing that!! i love it when buck turns eddie to jello <3 so lovely!

second child, restless child | lesbianrobin/@lesbianrobin | 23k and counting| M

how Evan and Maddie make it out of Pennsylvania, and Buck and Maddie build a family. okay so listen these past few weeks i've been doing this thing where i only rec finished fics, and every time i scroll through my ao3 history for these rec lists, i come across this one and go oh i wish i could rec this already. and then i realised wait it's my rec list i can do whatever i want, and so then i did. anyway, mind the tags for this one, but wow are you in for a treat here! i love the character dynamics (chim is brilliant in this!! and maddie!!) and i'm so so excited to see the rest of this fic unfold <3

said that i was fine, said it from my coffin | justhockey/tumblr | 7.3k | T

And it doesn’t matter that he feels like he’s dying. Like the version of himself that he’s always been is suddenly a stranger to him - just a mask he’d spent his entire life hiding behind, without ever even realising he was wearing it. It doesn’t matter that Eddie is…that he’s gay. Because he knows - as surely as he knows that the sun will rise again tomorrow - that the only person he has ever, and will ever, truly love is Buck. And Buck isn’t his to love. another blanket rec for an author who's been posting incredible fics!! this one in particular has such brilliant eddie characterisation and i just devoured it the second i got that little ao3 email hehe

there's no place like home-spun | icewhisper | 4.1k | GA

Buck has spent most of his life trying to find something to settle fidgeting hands and the restless need for a home. He found the key to the latter when he was thirteen. He finds the former in a cozy home on South Bedford Street with two of his favorite people. (AKA the Buck-crochets fic that literally no one asked for.). this fic makes me want to learn how to crochet. i am the least crafty person ever and i have like minus time but just know that if two weeks from now i'm posting about yarn and crochet hooks and whatnot, it's all thanks to this fic. i love buck who crochets so very much <3

you get your dreams for free | llovely/@butchdiaz| 14.9k | T

five times buck and eddie cuddle drunk and one time they cuddle sober. buddie bed sharing my absolute favourite. i read this late at night curled up under three blankets and it hit just right <3

[halfwayhearted]

Something Changed — Pablo Gavi.

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Fem!Reader

Summary: Thinking he’d ruin your night... he did the opposite.

Word Count: 635+

Disclaimer/s — Weirdo ex, banter-ish relationship, that’s it (?).

A/N: I don’t know where I was even going with this

Everything was making you uncomfortable, from the second you stepped out of the house to when you arrived at your friend’s house for a small house party. Except, it wasn’t small. Not at all.

It didn’t make it better that Gavi was also invited. You didn’t hate him per se—you… you don’t know.

He hadn’t bothered you yet. But knowing him, and knowing your friends, unfortunately, you knew that time would, in fact, be coming soon.

And it seemed ‘soon’ would be now, when you felt the couch beside you dip under the man’s weight.

However, it wasn’t him. In all honesty, you wished it was him. Instead, anger coursed through your veins at the sight of your ex-boyfriend sitting next to you. You swallowed hard, “What do you want?”

“Hey,” he hums, his face smug. “Wanted to talk.”

Was he serious? Why was he even here? Standing up from your seat, you grabbed your belongings and said, “Uh-huh. Not in the mood. I’m leaving.”

“Oh, come on!” The man—better yet, boy with how he acted—groans, standing up with you. “It’s been months. Don’t tell me you’re still stuck on what happened between us. It meant—”

“It meant nothing?” You interjected, your voice was flat. Fists clenched at your sides. You couldn’t, and probably wouldn’t, notice, but Gavi was watching intently from across the room.

He wasn’t even sure why your ex was there in the first place. The minute he sat down beside you, he was ready to stride over, but he knew where he stood. So... he stayed rooted in his spot.

“Yes! It didn’t mean anything. If you’d just let me fucking explain then you’d be able to see that.”

Though, the second he saw your ex take a step toward you, he crossed the room and was at your side in an instant, his hand hovering over your bicep like he wasn’t sure if you’d want him to fully rest it there. “Did you need something?”

His expression falters at the sight of Gavi next to you, making him clench his jaw and shake his head. “No, nothing at all. We’re all good.” And with one last, lingering glance, he walks away.

You didn’t know it’d be that easy. What the hell?

“Pablo—” you started, your mouth clamping shut when you saw him open his own to speak.

“I’m sorry. You seemed like you didn’t want him anywhere near you so I intervened. I know you’re going to say you could’ve handled it but I—”

Shaking your head, you lift your hands and gently grasp his forearms. “I wasn’t going to say that.”

You weren’t? Oh, okay. You weren’t… right, right.

“Thank you. I really didn’t want to speak to him and, as much as I hate to admit, I appreciated that a lot. More than you think. So… thank you.”

“You’re thanking me?” He responded, tilting his head. The smirk on his face grew the second he saw your lips part and your face redden. “Huh.”

He isn’t real. “Are you actually trying to ruin this moment?” You drawl. “I’m done. You can leave.”

A laugh escapes his lips as he drops his head. “I’m kidding! You’re welcome. I hope you know I’d do it again, even if I know you can handle it.”

“Yeah? Well… I hope you know I wouldn’t mind.”

“You wouldn’t mind? At all?”

You were really pushing it. “At all,” you confirmed.

That’s when something flickered in Gavi’s eyes, something you couldn’t quite decipher but wished you could. You’re even more surprised when his hand grazes the arm that’s still holding his. His voice is low but loud enough for you to hear, “Would you like to get a drink with me?”

“What, already?” You teased softly, “Yes, I would.”

Perhaps this night wouldn’t end how you thought.

Likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated ^_^.

DT(s) — @planetpedri + @spidybaby + @gadriezmannsgirl ! ౨ৎ

[thisismeracing]

Can I please request a charles dating a Greek girl *like the Korean girl you did*???👉🏻👈🏻🥹🥹🥹🥺🥺

Hi, love!!! of course <3 here you go! sorry for taking forever, I was off for a bit and just got back hihih

MICK DATING A GREEK GIRL | MS47

Warnings: mentions of food; tooth-rotting fluff; mentions of family members; not proofread.

A/n: Just a quick reminder that there are many shades, experiences, and backgrounds when it comes to greeks and their culture, what I am writing does not resume everything, but rather brings a piece of it to the table. <3

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Mick already knows Greece, but when you two start dating he's in for a whole new adventure aka getting familiar with culture, sayings, and the idiom;

He becomes obsessed with Greek cuisine. To him, everything is better when it's Greek - greek rice, greek break, greek spaghetti, and the latter let it slip during an interview, and you bet Ferrari fans we're mad for a week or so;

He would encourage you guys to visit the less tourist-centered cities and islands, instead suggesting places where you grew up or had stories to tell;

Mick would make sure to always have his camera on him and register random photos of you - he has a 'Greek girl <3' folder that consists mostly of pictures of you;

Randomly learned to introduce himself in Greek, but got his age wrong and it didn't matter how many times you tried to correct him, he would always forget and say it wrong again, so you just accepted that he was one hundred five instead of twenty-five when in Greece;

Though Mick loved the homey cities, he also loved the famous islands and whenever you traveled there at least one weekend would be spent in one of those. Athenas, Santorini, Corfu, Mykonos, Crete, Zakynthos, Ithaca, you name it, he will pack his bags at the speed of light and be ready to tag along;

He would watch movies that were ambient in Greece and ask you if things were accurate. He looved Mamma Mia and Greek Wedding;

Totally hints that he wants to have a greek wedding after you attend one together; The plates breaking? The common cup? the wedding face? He watched it all in awe;

Now when it comes to meeting the family Mick is nervous. He wants to make everything right so he will try to at least introduce himself in Greek -and he'll most likely get nervous again and say he's one hundred-five years lol it becomes a family thing, and he feels at home around your folks;

Same to you and his family that will definitely put Greece on their next vacay destination just to spend some quality family time with everyone.

Overall Mick is just super curious and open to learning about you and your culture, and will go around talking about how cool things are in Greece because he's this type of person. He's obsessed with your country, but he's even more obsessed with you.

────── ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: I hope you guys liked it! Let me know your thoughts, it means a lot to me <3 *mwah*

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[azrielwingspan]

THE CYBORG WHO STOLE MY HEART (Bucky X F!reader)

A/N: I know I know, there's another Bucky fanfic that I'm already working on and yet here I am starting a whole new one. Why you ask? Because I'm a dumbass. The idea just popped up into my head and I HAD TO write it down. Hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 1 :

Chapter summary: Bucky and Sam come across a woman who seems to have lost her mind. Literally. Using Bucky’s cyborg brain, they try to figure out who she is.

Chapter warnings: Mild swearing.

You know when you're having a great dream with a hot guy that could only possibly exist in dreams ? The happiness that breathing the same air as him brings you? That's what you were feeling right now.

Eyes as blue as the ocean, veins that were easy to put an IV in and that black shirt phew. Was it possible to drool in dreams? You were going to have a great day once you woke up. That was for sure.

Why was he looking at you like that though? Weren't they supposed to be flirting with you or puckering their lips in your dreams by now? Was this supposed to be a slow burn or enemies to lovers genre dream?

"Why is she staring at me like that?" the hot guy asks the air next to him.

"She's just coming into it, give her a second." it responds back to him.

Wait, what ?

"Are we sure she's alright and not having an absence seizure?" the air voice asks.

"She's alright. Probably in shock." another voice responds.

Shock? From seeing that beautiful man in front of me? Sure.

Okay, focus.

Wait, it's a dream. Why do you need to focus?

Eyes, the colour of piss , come into focus. "Cannn youuu hearrr meee?"

"Why are you speaking like that?" you manage to ask, still trying to figure out if you'd accidentally taken shrooms.

"Not a seizure then." the voice from earlier comments.

Piss eyes looks proud of himself. "I told you, she's in shock."

If this really was a dream, it would have to be the strangest one you have had in a while. What in the actual cockfuck was happening?

"Youu areee in theee hosp-ee-taalll. Weee---" piss eyes sounded like he was having the seizure.

"Stop talking like that." you say, blinking rapidly to clear the dark spots from your eyes. Things were starting to feel more...real. A heaviness settled over your head, every breath seemed to send a slight sliver of pain through your side and your arm felt numb.

Dreams weren't usually ultra-realistic, were they? Only one way to find out now.

"Is she...pinching herself?" hot guy asks, that strange look on his face.

A set of cold hands clamp your hands down.

"HEY." you say, the slight sting of your pinch confirming your doubts.

"Self hurt or mutilation can be a side effect. We need to restrain her for her own safety." Piss eyes speaks rapidly and you hear him muttering to himself.

"I'm not...is this not a dream?" you finally ask leaving the room in pin drop silence.

"I don't think so...unless Wanda is upto something again." air voice sounds a bit unsure himself.

"Wanda?" the name seemed familiar but in this state , you could barely remember your own name.

You try to get up only to be gently pushed back down by piss eyes. "You probably shouldn't be doing that. Bed rest for the next 10 days, I'm afraid." he says not sounding apologetic about it at all.

"What even happened? And---" you're cut off by air voice.

"Where are you? Well, the Avengers compound. Now, don't get too excited and all. We can make you sign a NDA , but we aren't going to because we're hoping you're trustworthy. Stark said you might be...useful. Now, if you're feeling upto it, how the hell did you end up in the middle of a cemetry half dead?"

You blinked once, twice, thrice.

"Who is Stark?"

"Listen, man. She's got to be living under a rock if she doesn't know who Stark is. That guy has been stuffed down everyone's fucking throat." Sam tells Bucky as he takes off he looks at their new visitor.

Bucky doesn't respond and instead stares at Sam with a poker face.

"What's going on in that cyborg brain of yours?" Sam isn't phased by Bucky and his staring anymore. He was however very sure that Bucky would not be bringing home any ladies with that serial killer look.

"What if she's lying?" Bucky finally says, turning to look at the CCTV recording of the room you were in. You were sleeping again, knocked out by the pain killers.

"Lying about not knowing Stark or not being able to remember what happened to her?"

"Both."

"What purpose does that serve her?"

"Well, that's what we're supposed to find out."

“How exactly are you planning on doing that?” Crossing his arms over his chest , Sam raised an eyebrow at his cyborg friend.

“I’ll think about it.” Bucky walked past him, grabbing his jacket on the way. “With my cyborg brain.”

“I understand that you want to get some answers” you said for what seemed like the 100th time, exasperation taking hold of you. “I honestly cannot remember what happened. I’ve thought myself into a headache. I’m sorry, okay?”

Sam looked defeated as he let he shook his head. “It’s been two whole days. Now, I don’t want to seem like a dick and question you in this state but we need some goddamn answers.”

“Too late for that I guess.” you muttered under your breath.

“Huh?”

“She said ‘too late for that I guess.’” The hot guy, Bucky, was his name chimed in.

How the hell did he hear that? As if reading the question on your face, he simply said “Advanced hearing.”

Okkayyyy.

Sam on the other hand was giving you a flat look. You gave him one back.

“I’m feeling much better now. Can I atleast get out of this damn bed?” you scratched near the iv line, wanting to just rip it out. “Piss eyes told me I shouldn’t but I cannot stay like this.”

“Piss eyes?” Sam was clearly running out of patience.

“The doc. Is he even a doctor? He’s very…”

“Sort of.”

That explains it.

“She’s right.” Bucky takes a step forward, looking at Sam. “Walking around will help her recover faster.”

“THANK YOU. See , I knew you were the smart one.” you give him a wide smile to which you get a poker face in return. Embarrassing. Not letting it deter you, you pull the iv out.

“Hey !!” Sam steps forward, surprised at your show of stupidity.

Before he can reach you to help you out of bed, you’ve already stood up. Which was another stupid move considering that the entire room was spinning around. Holding on to the wall next to you for support, you blinked rapidly.

“That’s another concussion waiting to happen.” Bucky commented dryly.

After regaining some semblance of direction, you managed to stand up straight ignoring the slight stab of pain in your chest.

“Much better.” you say, taking a step forward. The pastel pink tee and pants that had been given to you did not compliment your current condition, you knew. To be quite frank, you were a good looking woman too. Always have been. Then why the hell was Bucky looking at you like he was going to stab you right then and there?

“Uhhh…now what?” your suddenly felt extremely awkward in front of the two men.

“Don’t ask me, you were the one who wanted to do this.” Sam still had an arm out, ready to jump into action in case you cracked your head on the tiles again. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Bucky make a slight movement. Thank fuck you did because the next thing you knew , you were holding a dagger 2 inches away from your chest by the handle.

Silence engulfed the room for a good 20 seconds before it was broken by a very calm “What. The. Fuck.” from Sam.

You looked at Bucky who stood in the same spot like nothing shocking had even happened. Finally a crack of a smile appeared on his face.

“Told you she was lying.”

[gothamite-rambler]

Batfamily Mitzvah: Bruce tried to make sure Selina never learned about cousin Linda

Context: As the family birthday gathering approaches—an event they can hardly stand—Kate discovers some new information about the bar mitzvah. Specifically, she learns that it's called a bar mitzvah for boys. With this fresh insight, she decides to make a surprise visit to share the news with her favorite cousin, Bruce Wayne… right in the middle of his date with Selina Kyle. Isn’t she thoughtful?

Kate strolled past the tables of a high-end restaurant, catching the attention of a few patrons who raised their eyebrows at her disheveled appearance. As she reached Bruce's table, she slapped her hand down dramatically on the surface to announce her arrival.

Kate: Bruce, have you—

Bruce: How were you able to enter this place? That's not an insult about your appearance; you already know how I feel about that. They won't allow people in unless they pay an entrance fee.

Kate (raised an eyebrow): Oh, like Golden Corral?

Bruce (frustrated): You know that's not the same.

Kate chuckled, snatching a piece of broccoli from his plate and quickly popping it into her mouth before Bruce could grab her hand.

Kate: I'm just messing with you. I told the guy at the front that I was your jilted mistress and that I'd stab him if he tried to stop me from confronting you.

She gestured toward the nervous reservation man, who trembled slightly and quickly raised his menu to hide his face as Kate waved. Bruce sighed, burying his face in his hands.

Selina (taking a sip of her wine): So I'm not the other woman? Nice.

Kate: Love your dress, Selina. You dumping him soon?

Selina laughed, shaking her head with a hint of bemusement.

Selina: You're not my type.

Kate (pointing to Bruce): He is?

Bruce (impatient): Hey, why are you really here? To embarrass me? Because it's not going to work this time.

Kate: I’ll just have to try harder then. Anyway, I messed up a few details about our cousin Linda's grandson's Bar Mitzvah. First, I got the name wrong; apparently, the girls have a Bat Mitzvah. Why didn't you tell me that?

Bruce: You mocked me for not knowing I’m Jewish, which was a mistake that can happen to anyone who watched their parents die in an alley.

Kate: I should have a jar for the times you use your orphan status as a get-out-of-jail-free card. A dollar every time it's used.

Selina (joking): You'd need more than one jar.

Bruce gave Selina a look of betrayal at her comments about him. Selina smiled, sipping from her wine glass.

Selina: I say that not to be mean, Brucie. It's just that sometimes you overuse it. Like avoiding a paintball event at your job because 'my parents were shot in an alleyway.'

Kate: Or when you ducked out of a wedding because you said it reminded you of 'Mom and Dad getting married.' You weren't even a thought when they got married.

Bruce (bending his fork): Kate, you skipped out on that wedding too!

Kate: Yeah, but I’m awesome and don’t need an excuse. I just said I wasn't going because Cousin Marty sucks and has been married nine times, and that bride number ten isn’t 'the one.'

Selina: How long did they last?

Kate: He's married to bride number twelve now. I’ve stopped bothering to learn their names, right, Bruce?

Bruce had his face covered again as Kate playfully slapped her hand against his back.

Bruce: Please circle back to the details about the Bar Mitzvah so you can leave.

Kate snapped her fingers, remembering why she originally made this visit.

Kate: I forgot the name of the synagogue, but I wrote down the directions. The party afterward is at The Grand Oak Banquet Hall, where Beth and I had our Bat Mitzvah—I got it right this time.

Kate slapped Bruce on the arm again while chuckling. Selina covered her mouth with her cloth napkin, nodding in agreement with a smile.

Kate: Linda is apparently going all out for this, and while I hate her so much, it's best we’re on our best behavior. She might put us in the will.

Bruce: I'm good.

Selina (interjecting): Linda was the one who stabbed her husband with a poker from the fireplace?

Kate: No, that was our great-aunt Susanna. Linda was the one who hit her husband with a car.

Selina (correctly guessing): After he slept with her sister, they stayed together not because they believed in marriage, but because that sister later died in a hospital fire.

Kate: That's the one! Damn, you remembered the fire too? Wow, cuzzo, you’ve got a great listener here.

Selina (pointing her thumb at Bruce): I've had decades of practice with this guy.

Bruce muttered curse words under his breath, still trying to comprehend how this was all happening during his date with Selina.

Bruce (muffled): Don't forget the part where you said you'd do the same to me after I told you the story.

Selina: I said it was on a list if you ever betrayed me.

Kate: Hot, smart, and vengeful. I can see why he loves you.

Selina: Aww, thanks.

Bruce (raising his voice): Can you just tell me why you’re here?!

Nearby patrons stared at the trio perplexed causing Bruce to blush with embarrassment. Kate smirked, pleased by his discomfort.

Kate: Right, so the Bar—not Bat—Mitzvah is going to be at that event hall at four in the afternoon, but we can be twenty or thirty minutes late. It gives us time to grab a few drinks at the bar next to the hall. I'm a regular there because of these events.

Bruce (lamenting): I hope they have strong drinks.

Kate (relating): Oh, they do. It's formal, and the color Linda picked is all shades of blue. Her son and his wife apparently have no say in the matter.

Selina (surprised): Oh wow. Wait, is it connected to an inheritance or will?

Kate (nodding): Yeah, she’s crazy but rich as hell. Like as rich as him.

Kate pointed to a mortified Bruce, who stared at his plate of steak, zoning out of the conversation, prompting Kate to flick him on the ear to get his attention.

Kate: As I was saying, she demanded blue everything because—

Kate cleared her throat.

Kate (hoity-toity New Yorker accent): "He's a boy, and boys love blue, and I'm payin' for it."

Bruce rubbed the temple of his forehead at how accurately Kate imitated their cousin. Selina listened with enjoyment, not touching her plate of salmon.

Kate: I'm thinking we could wear blue suits, but the shades need to be different because we aren’t matching. All right, Bruce? Bruce?

Selina (playfully hitting Bruce on the arm): Make sure your shade of blue doesn’t match hers.

Bruce rolled his eyes.

Bruce: Got it. Why aren’t you wearing a dress again, Kate? Worried it’ll look ridiculous on you?

Kate: I know I can rock a blue dress; I have in the past. But this is a protest so that Linda knows I’m into women and won’t try to set me up with her friend from church who totally can "change my mind about being a lesbian." I’ll wear combat boots and get a buzz cut until she sees and tolerates it. I’ve accepted that I’m never going to get to acceptance.

Kate chuckled at her own joke.

Selina (agreeing): I swear, my mother was the exact same way. I totally get wearing the suit.

Kate: Thank you, cousin-in-law. Hey, Bruce, I’m starving; I didn’t stop for food before making this important visit. I’m just going to do this real quick.

Kate took the knife next to Bruce’s plate and sliced a small piece of steak, chewing it for a few seconds while nodding.

Kate: Medium rare, good pick.

Bruce: Yeah, I was enjoying it too. Let me see if I got everything: You got the address to the synagogue, it’s at the banquet hall that side of the family has used since I was a child, Linda is insane but we have to behave so you can get her beach house in the will, the formal color for the event is blue because she’s crazy, and you want me to wear a darker shade of blue for my suit. Did I miss anything?

Kate: Bingo you got it all correct! And Lenny will be there; he got released from Oaks Asylum, and he’s going strong on being a vocal Batman truther. He hasn’t let up about that.

Selina (confused): Batman truther?

Bruce (exhausted): They think Batman is a mythical entity, which is why he always lurks in the night. They don’t consider that more crimes happen at night—nope, he's a cryptid. I stopped enjoying the rumor when it spiraled into other nonsensical conspiracy theories.

Kate quickly swiped a slice of potato from Bruce’s plate before he could react. He huffed in annoyance but reminded himself to stay calm since they were in a public restaurant.

Kate: To be fair, the guy wears a bat suit.

Selina giggled, enjoying the exchange as she sipped her wine.

Bruce: It’s not funny; he won't shut up about it. And you’re not one to talk, Kate.

Kate: Don’t be jelly; Batwoman looks better than you.

Bruce: Selina, am I actually unconscious in a hospital right now?

Selina (shaking her head): Sorry, this is real.

Kate (mocking her cousin): He’s upset I interrupted your date, like you won’t be having sex later.

Bruce groaned, tapping his fingers on the table as he desperately wished for Kate to leave.

Selina: She's not wrong, but Bruce, you've held off on asking if I want to attend this Bar Mitzvah.

Bruce: It’s better for your sanity if you don’t meet them.

Kate: Oh, come on, Bruce; she’s used to the crazier aspects of your life. She should come with us. The more the merrier… and Linda not talking to me. Fair warning, though: She likes to be called Aunt Linda by everyone except her kids, and she will ask you a ton of evasive questions about your criminal past. It's a good laugh once you realize she's batshit insane.

Selina: I've dealt with intense interrogations and my own insane family reunions. I don't mind—

Bruce (interrupting, at his limit): No, no, you are not coming. I'm doing this to protect you—

Kate (correcting): He's worried they'll embarrass him in front of you.

Bruce (pointing to the way she came in): Kate, leave! Thanks for the info, but leave now or I will have security drag you out of here.

Kate: I think I successfully embarrassed you enough, and you’re welcome. Just remember, in two weeks, we’re going to the synagogue. I know churches scare you because you’re a baby, but at least try to step foot in this one.

Bruce blinked with suppressed frustration, choosing not to reply.

Selina: That means he’ll do it.

Kate: Good, now you’re not eating that steak, and I’m still starving, so I’ll take this off your hands.

Kate quickly grabbed the plate that Bruce was still prodding at, earning a fierce glare from him. He resigned himself to the fact that he wouldn't be getting that plate back.

Kate: Oh, and this—

With a swift motion, she slapped her cousin across the face with enough force that he fell to the ground.

Bruce (high-pitched): WHY?!

Kate: I LOVED YOU, YOU BASTARD! YOU CAN HAVE HIM; HE'S BROUGHT ME NOTHING BUT GRIEF!

Selina (playing along): Yes, get out of here; he’s mine!

Kate: Good riddance.

Dramatically, Kate stormed out as Bruce recovered, sinking back into his chair while rubbing the stinging side of his face. The surrounding patrons looked on with mixed reactions—some were shocked, some disgusted by Bruce Wayne being a cheater, and two old men nodded in approval.

Selina: She is such a delight.

Bruce groaned, annoyed that he lost his meal and looked like a fool.

Bruce: She took my steak! Dang it.

Selina (sliding her plate over): Want my salmon? I'm full.

Bruce: I appreciate that; thank you. I can't believe I'm going to have to be around Linda, Lenny, and all of them. Selina, if you truly love me, please don't go.

Selina: I have insane family; I get it and won't go, but if you change your mind, I have a dress that's perfect for parties like this.

Bruce: Thank you, and I'll consider that, but for right now, let’s enjoy this date.

Selina nodded.

Selina (jokingly): You think people here will figure out she was your cousin?

Bruce closed his eyes and held his head down, sighing at that realization.

Bruce: I'm going to get her back for that.

1st part -> Batfamily Mitzvah

[changenameno]

Sugarplum, then?

(One-Shot)

Summary: Back in the day your dad’s been in the military, where he met most of his long term friends, including Syverson. He apparently was his best friend, though you’ve never met him. Well, until now…

 

Pairing: Sy x Fem. Reader

Warnings: MDNI, 18+, older man x younger woman (off age though! reader is attending college), praise kink, pet names, teasing, reader is a brat, rough sex, slapping and choking, p in v

Word Count: 2.7K

 

A/N: Okay this was honestly quite spontaneous, buuut Dad’s best friend aka Sy did just NOT leave my mind, so here we go. This is FLITHY, you’ve been warned. Any mistakes are my own. Reblogs and comments are much appreciated! Enjoy ;) ❤️✨

!Syverson is not my creation!

 

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When you came home, you could hear loud laughter, coming from the living room. At first you thought your parents had invited over the neighbours once more. But when you put your jacket on a hanger listening in closer, you noticed the southern drawl as the deep rumbling voice continued to tell a story.

 

 

You didn’t recognise that voice? Though it certainly didn’t belong to one of your neighbours. Curious, you peeked around the corner into the living room. There at the dinner table your parents sat with their backs turned to you, and in front of them was a bearded man, burly arms crossed. His imposing form, clearly meant that he wasn’t just big, sitting down. You could only guess, but as you had seen quite a few military men over the years he had to be one, estimated by his demeanour alone.

 

 

As your eyes moved over every bulging muscle you could make out from where you stood, they finally landed on his face. His dark beard looked well-groomed, framing his plush lips, then his pearly whites were on display as he grinned. That made you look up and sure enough his blue eyes were already focused on your face.

 

 

Heartbeat picking up, as his smile widened into a shit-eating-grin, he had caught you blatantly staring at him. A brief nod from him, made your presence known to your parents as well, they turned in their seats and your mother chided right away, “Oh you could have announced yourself know? Come and say hello to our guest!”

 

 

You didn’t really have much of a choice, so you reluctantly entered the room, greeting the man opposite your dad, “Um, hello…nice to meet you, um… Sir?”

 

 

A smug look replaced his grin, when he answered, “Well, no need to call me Sir, kiddo. Sy ‘s fine, too.”

 

 

You wanted to huff at the dumb nickname, but held back, to avoid making this anymore awkward than it already was. So you simply chose to nod.

 

 

Your Dad shook his head laughing lightly, “So that’s our daughter. Normally not as shy though, am I right, sugarplum?”

 

 

You wanted to desperately vanish, why would your dad call you that in front of a guest?! No less, a guest who looked incredibly handsome. Embarrassed beyond believe, you tried to escape, mumbling something about having to study.

 

 

“Alright, but dinner is in an hour,” your mom called after you, as you’d already jogged upstairs.

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True to her words she knocked at your door an hour later. When the door swung open before you even had the chance to answer, you growled angrily without looking up from the book you’ve been reading, “You could have waited until I said yes! I could have been naked!”

 

 

The answer you got, made you freeze, “Really? Maybe ya could’ve locked your door then?”

 

 

Sy’s voice sounded amused and it riled you up, tremendously. Closing your book, you slowly rolled onto your side then sat up on your bed, glaring at the man casually leaning against your doorframe.

 

 

“No need to give me such dirty look. Just here to tell ya, dinner ‘s ready, kiddo.”

 

 

As if he knew that name annoyed you immensely, his blue eyes seemed to sparkle even more, when you ground out, “Don’t call me that!”

 

 

As you stood up, approaching him, he teased back, “Why not?”

 

Mirroring his crossed arms, you huffed, “Well, first of I’m not a kid anymore. And second-“. Sy had suddenly stood up straight, very much towering over you now.

 

 

There it was, that stupid smug smirk of his, “Should I call ya, sugarplum then?”

 

 

This man irked you, so much. Additionally it was incredibly unfair how good he looked doing that.

 

 

“Hell no!” You didn’t even like it when your dad called you that.

 

 

“How ‘bout I call ya,” he paused, then leaned down, lips against your ear whispering, “my good little girl, then?”

 

 

You weren’t fast enough, the unexpected proximity combined with his filthy words, made a whimper escape, before you could suppress it.

 

 

Sy leaned back, pupils clearly blown out because of your pathetic, little whimper. “Atta girl. Now, I believe dinner ‘s ready.”

 

 

Completely petrified, at your own wanton response to him, you tired shuffling past him, but not before a big hand landed on your ass, making you squeak at the impact.

 

 

When you glared back at Sy, he only winked at you, making your stomach do summersaults. How could someone you just met, make you that desperate?

 

 

Before you could do anything stupid, you quickly descended the stairs.

 

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Yesterday at dinner you had found out, that Sy was indeed military. He’d been your dad’s captain and was still his best friend apparently. You tried not to think about the fact that you found him extremely desirable and wanted nothing more than to jump him right here and now. Especially as the conversation continued and the Captain’s heavy eyes hadn’t left you for even a second.

 

 

Igniting an inextinguishable fire inside you, an unbearable need to have this behemoth between your legs. Wanting to find out first hand, just how quickly that man could ruin you.

 

 

You were also very delighted to find out, he’d be staying with you for a couple of weeks. Unconsciously rubbing your thighs together in anticipation when it was announced he’d sleep in the guest room, right across the hall from yours.

 

 

Now you were lounging on the couch downstairs, knowing your parents wouldn’t be back, until later tonight. They had a previous engagement they couldn’t cancel, not having known then, Sy would show up. Though he had tried placating his best friend, by swearing he’d just wanted a quiet evening anyway.

 

 

You could have sworn his blue eyes had flitted to you as he’d said that, making you wonder what exactly he meant by ‘quiet evening’.

 

 

It was anticlimactic though, because when your parents had left an hour ago, Sy had wordlessly turned, walked upstairs and you had heard his bedroom door shutting in the distance.

 

 

Leaving you here lounging on the couch, waiting for something to happen. As the hours ticked by, you mindlessly switched through the channels, not truly interested in what was on. How could he lead you on so much and then do nothing? That was more than a little diabolic, wasn’t it?

 

 

Your frustration slowly turned to anger, when nothing, absolutely nothing happened. Mulling over the few interactions you’ve had with Sy, you began to doubt he’d wanted anything from you in the first place. Had you just imagined the burning gaze of his eyes? It couldn’t be, right? You weren’t that desperate, were you?

 

 

No answer you could come up with, was in the least bit satisfying, so you decided to call it a night. Switching off the TV, you went upstairs into your room to change into your favourite sleep shirt. Admittedly it barely covered your panty clad behind, but you were beyond caring now. The Captain was probably already asleep anyway.

 

 

Once you’d brushed your teeth and were ready for bed, you tiptoed back to your room. Still too frustrated to actually fall asleep, you lay on your side glaring into the darkness. And now what?

 

 

Your parents had come home some time ago, actually earlier than you had expected, at only half past twelve, though they had retired to bed right away.

 

 

You signed, you were wide awake and you blamed Sy with his filthy mouth and his stupid ass muscles and…

 

 

Just as you were about to curse his entire existence, you heard a door open and close again. Then you heard the tap running.

That was your chance. You were going to show him what teasing meant!

 

 

As quickly as you could, you ran out of your room, across the hall and entered the guest room, silently shutting the door. Just as you had hopped into his bed, the door opened again, revealing Sy’s muscled silhouette against the light coming from the bathroom.

 

 

You couldn’t see his face, but when he closed the door, slowly locking it as well, you were sure he smirked smugly when he turned, addressing you, “Took ya, long enough.”

 

 

You nearly spluttered, at his cock-sure remark. That devil had you waiting four hours and then he dared to say, you were late?!

Oh. Two could play that game though.

 

 

“Aww sorry, is that a grey hair from the stress of me being late, Captain?”

 

 

You only just finished the sentence, when Sy’s big hand closed around your neck, lightly squeezing in warning, as he growled, “Don’t get smart with me girl.”

 

 

He leaned down, tilting your head back, so you had to look up into his face. “Listen, I’m not some college boy, alright?” You swallowed thickly, nodding in agreement, as well as you could with his rough hand still squeezing your windpipe.

 

 

You knew he wasn’t, actually you’d hoped for exactly what he said next, “Meanin’ I do rough and fast. If ya stay, ya agree to that, understood?”

 

 

His hand finally loosened, so you could answer verbally, “Y-yeah, understood.”

 

 

“Atta girl.” Then he switched on the bedside lamp, illuminating the room in a warm orange hue.

 

 

You bit your lip to stop the whimper from escaping, Sy stood there as naked as the day he was born.

 

 

Every part of your body began to tingle, pussy pulsing between your thighs. He was big. No.

That was an understatement, he was huge. His cock stood erect, just as proud as he did. It wasn’t just his sheer length, his girth wasn’t anything to dismiss either.

 

 

He meanly grinned down at you kneeling on his mattress, “Still sure ya wanna stay?”

 

 

Licking over your bottom lip, you panted excitedly, “Yes, please.”

 

 

He spit into his right hand getting it wet, then he moved it between his tree truck thighs gripping his cock, “Hmm my, what a polite, little girl. Excited, aren’t ya?”

 

 

As he began moving his hand up and down his shaft, your eyes were glued to the movement, not able to look anywhere else. He groaned his next words, left hand landing on your naked thigh, “Lose the shirt, wanna see ya.”

 

 

You did as he said, pulling your sleepshirt over your head and flinging it onto the floor.

The second the light illuminated your nearly naked body, his cock twitched violently and he quickly let go.

 

 

“Fuck. Will ya look at that? Such a pretty lil’ thing and all for me yeah?”

 

 

“Yeah, all for you.”

 

 

His eyes seemed darker, somehow more sinister than before, fully blown out by lust. “You’re killin’ me darlin’…How ‘bout ya lose them ruined panties as well.”

 

 

It wasn’t really a question, but you nodded anyway before you leaned back and shimmied out of your panties. His hand encased your wrist, stopping you before the soaking wet fabric would land on the floor as well. Sy took the panties, bringing them to his mouth, making a show of licking through your juices left behind in the sullied fabric.

 

 

This surely set your already overheated cunt on fire, mewling desperately at the way his eyes greedily drank your body in, while he tasted your sweet nectar.

 

 

Apparently satisfied for now, he tossed your panties aside. Gleaming sapphires fixed between your legs, “Think I’m ready for the main event.”

 

And with that he pushed you back, until you lay on your back and he could step between your spread thighs.

 

 

A little panicky that he hadn’t prepared you, you piped up, “W-wait aren’t you… gonna prepare…me?”

 

 

Sy chuckled, then landed a light slap onto your exposed clit, making your whole body spasm, back bowing off the mattress as you shrieked at the pain mixing deliciously with blinding pleasure.

 

 

“Love, you’re soakin’ wet, what more ‘s there to prepare?”

 

 

You gulped, when he took his imposing length, rubbing it through your velvety folds. Then without further warning, you felt the head starting to slip in. Eager to feel your tight walls enclosing around his throbbing cock, Sy slowly pushed further inside. Quickly you wrapped your arms around his neck, squeezing when a light stinging sensation spread through your straining cunt.

 

 

He noticed your furrowed brows right away, leaning his head down and taking one of your erect nipples in his mouth, suckling gently until you threw you head back, panting as a familiar warmth invaded your lower stomach. Even before he was half way inside, Sy had you coming around him with a loud squeal.

 

 

Swiftly he used your orgasm to thrust forward, burying his shaft inside your quivering pussy to the hilt. Full beyond anything you’d felt before you moaned loudly, though this time a hand covered your mouth as he huskily hissed, “Gotta be quiet darlin’. Unless ya want Daddy to come knockin’ at my door.”

 

 

He groaned, as your cunt continued to squeeze around him, “Ya feel even better than I imagined.”

 

 

Only being able to breathe through your nose, didn’t make it any easier to get used to the huge poker inside your stomach. But Sy was kind enough to wait until you did.

 

You nodded and when he didn’t seem to notice, you lightly licked his hand that got his attention immediately.

“Hmm I see, someone ‘s ready. Next time we’ll try out that lil’ tongue.”

 

 

When he shifted a bit, he was pressed into your g-spot, grinning cockily when your back bowed off the bed again. “Found it.”

 

 

That smug bastard, knew exactly what he was doing, without leaving that spot, he manoeuvred you into a mating press, both your legs positioned over his broad shoulders. Your chest touching his hairy pecks, immediately creating friction, as he pulled back a little bit, only to slam back inside you.

 

 

A groan left his lips, and a scream would have left yours if it weren’t for his hand sealing them shut. Your hips automatically bucked upwards, trying to keep up. But Sy just kept ramming inside your tight hole at a pace that you thought humanly impossible, using you as his own personal ragdoll, grunting every time his balls slapped against your ass.

 

 

You couldn’t do much as his free hand held onto your shoulder, so you wouldn’t slide up the bed away from his rough fucking. Each stroke of his impossibly wide cock, had you whimpering behind his hand. Sy’s body continued to slam into yours, though his groans got louder and louder, until he suddenly decided to switch gears.

 

 

His teeth sank painfully into your shoulder, trying to stifle his own sounds of pleasure against your flesh. The hand that previously covered your mouth had slid down, wrapping around your neck, smothering your building moans right at the source. The sensation made your head feel pleasantly empty, pussy convulsing rhythmically around him.

 

 

It was too much, you couldn’t hold on any longer, the pain of his bite mixing with the onslaught of pleasure and the breathlessness you felt, tipped you right over the edge. Overwhelmed by pleasure, tears started streaming down your cheeks, choking on a whimper as Sy grunted a last, “Fu-uck!”

 

Then you felt his thick, hot cum filling your insides, prolonging your orgasm for a bit, he finally ceased his movements after a last hard thrust. Sy’s hand left your throat right away, as did his teeth your shoulder.

 

 

He gently ran a hand over your stomach, making you shiver as the movement tickled. “You did so well, my good little darlin’, aren’t ya?”

 

 

Completely boneless you nodded and smiled up at him, when he muttered his next words, “Let’s freshen up, hm?!”

🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑

Taglist:

If you’re interested in being on my taglist, please let me know! And if you want to be taken off (my taglist), feel free to tell me!❤️✨

[intothedysphoria]

Steve is awoken at like 3 in the morning by an incessant pounding on the door.

He shuffles into his slippers and pads down the stairs, baseball bat in hand just in case.

At the door is a weary, dishevelled Billy Hargrove who looks like he’s on the verge of collapse.

Steve, alarmed ushers him in.

Sara Harrington, who was never exactly the heaviest sleeper, is already downstairs, peering at Billy with concern.

She leans down to his level, already splayed across the couch and makes a halting attempt at the language she hates so much.

Billy, shockingly, responds in imperfect but recognisable Yiddish before passing out.

Sara’s response is both deeply troubled but also has undercurrents of relief woven in.

“You never told me you found a Jewish friend.”

Well, friend is a stretch and Steve had no idea until about 5 seconds ago that Billy was anything but Irish Catholic.

Joshua finds out three hours later, when he wakes up to find a boy he doesn’t know at his dining table.

That makes Billy freeze, hairs standing on end in the middle of reaching for a pastry.

He only relaxes again when Steve’s dad makes a terrible joke about breakfast food and sits down, completely unfazed.

Steve manages to park himself right next to Billy, frantically whispering as he tries to figure out what the fuck is going on.

Billy’s response is a shrugged “dad found out I still practiced and kicked me out”, as if that isn’t one of the most horrific things Steve has ever heard.

Billy joins them for Shabbat that evening, as it’s a Friday. It’s clear he’s the real deal and that leaves Steve’s head swimming with questions. Why the fuck did a man so obviously bigoted marry a Jewish woman?

They smoke together peacefully on Steve’s driveway, Billy blowing out a long billow of smoke up into the night sky. He shifts slightly closer to Steve. Almost looking like he might reach out but then moves away.

Billy moves in permanently with the Byers. Steve sees him frequently at Temple, bantering with the Rabbi. It’s weird but seeing him in this environment, Steve could never picture him anywhere else.

Steves not got a crush or anything. He just daydreams about kissing Billy after he gets back from Rosh Hashana services. Normal guy stuff.

One night Billy climbs through his window. He just wants someone to talk to. Joshua and Sara are out on a business trip so Steve puts on Bronski Beat and they dance. Sensual. Steve’s head is on a fairground ride.

He’s pretty sure Billy leans in quickly to peck him on the lips but it’s so brief it might have been a dream.

It all kind of snowballs from there.

Certainly in terms of pseudo (?) romance. Which Steve isn’t complaining about

Steve thinks he may be sleepwalking. He flips through pamphlets about coming out and all of them inevitably point the same flashing arrow straight to him.

There’s a lump in his throat when he comes out to his parents. They’re so supportive, almost aggressively so and it makes Steve’s heart swell.

Coming out to Billy is a different kettle of fish. Steves fully aware that he’s obfuscating the matter, especially with the way he’ll lean into Billy’s touch but it’s just scary. Terrifying really.

Eventually though, he concedes.

Billy’s managed to get him into the backseat of the Camaro. It’s nowhere near as x rated as particularly Robin was expecting, more just second base. Something like that.

Steve finally manages to break away from the kiss and declare “I think I’m gay”.

Billy’s face says no shit but he’s not a dick about it. Instead, he motions for Steve to go on.

There’s a lot of cliches Steve could use. A fuck ton. But he keeps it brief.

He mumbles that he loves Billy and waits for the other shoe to drop.

It never does. Not really.

Billy just says it back. And they carry on.

This isn’t quite a Pesach or Chanukah fic but tysm @kallisto-k and @slime-hoe for your lovely comments, I hope this Jewish Harringrove is ok

@shieldofiron @dragonflylady77 @oopsiedaisiesbaby @harringroveobsessed @runraerun

[factorialsotherfandoms]

arthur and joui, and tea

Hello lovely saga, how do you feel about helping me crack a new au.

I say new... these are the stats on the actual work file for it (and I left a lot of gaps to fill in later...)

Marcela permits Arthur to leave the infirmary at 10am the next day, and only after further blood tests. He has to promise to return overnight, but it's still better than...

Everyone on that mission has been through worse. Everyone is alive, and being treated, just...

Well, Arthur is a sniper. If the stupid creatures didn't burrow, he wouldn't have even been poisoned.

It doesn't matter now. He says farewell to Fernando as the only other person awake, makes a brief check of the rest of the team (not fine, but safe, and healing), says thank you to Marcela and the rest of the team, and heads out of the infirmary.

Joui, arms crossed, pout applied, is waiting right across from the door.

"Hey Joui," Arthur raises his hand in greeting, only for it to be grabbed.

Nothing is said as Joui pulls him away.

They do not head for the stairs and the Bun room as Arthur had hoped, rather around the back of a power generator. From there...

Well on the other side of that specific power generator is Suvaco Seco, his mother's bar.

She will be asleep; last night Ivete stayed late at Arthur's bedside, anxious for confirmation that the antidotes had worked. At around 2am this morning he had made her promise to rest, and he hopes she's sticking to it.

Joui drags him inside, pushes him towards a small table, and jumps over the bar. Arthur watches as he raids the cupboards, or well watches and occassionally comments. Whatever Joui is looking for it takes a while to find.

It is not until the kettle clicks off that Arthur recognises it as a teapot. The silence remains as Joui makes and serves it, Arthur using the quiet to doze a little.

Joui is not very good at being annoyed. He'll say something when it's too much for him.

Sure enough, he caves almost as soon as he sits down.

"Arthur."

"Joui-" he begins to reply.

"You left me," Joui cuts across, accusation thick in his tone. "You, and Cesar, and Liz."

"Thiago stayed too," Arthur replies, hand raised in mock surrender. "You know the Devil; trying to enter into melee with it..."

"I have a gun!"

"And you're better with a sword."

It is true. If Joui can't use his swords on a mission, it's better for someone else to come. The faster things die the less harm they can do, and the state of the team is already bad enough. None of their teams are exactly rigid, and Arthur still stands by Veríssimo's choice of swapping Joui and Thiago out for Fernando and Erin.

Things would have been much, much worse without Erin being there to shred armour, however brutal her injuries are.

"I still could have helped." Joui's voice has fallen.

He /shouldn't/ have. If the Magistrate had shown up to cause problems while they were already struggling to contain the Devil... Well, that's less a problem now the latter is dead-dead, at least.

Probably.

Hopefully.

... What are the chances of a second resurrection chamber?

But this is Joui, so it's just easier to say "You could."

"And you left me," Joui repeats. "And you got hurt. All of you did. You're not supposed to get hurt, Arthur."

Arthur can hear the unspoken 'that's supposed to be me'.

Still waiting for his tea to cool, Arthur reaches out and grabs Joui's hand.

"And we'll be fine. Some new scars, but there's new scars every mission, yeah? Marcela isn't worried, just says everyone needs time to heal."

"She always says that."

"Because nobody ever listens."

"I listen!"

Joui does not listen, and Arthur tells him so.

And then Joui cracks. He picks up his tea and gets up, swapping his position from opposite Arthur to next to him. He leans over, putting his head to the remains of Arthur's shoulder.

"Seeing as you all schemed to abandon me," Joui sounds less hurt now, though Arthur is sure they'll talk about it again once Liz and Kaiser are released from the infirmary. "I get the cool sword you stole."

"Take that up with Veríssimo," Arthur laughs. "There's a shotgun, too."

"Really?!"

"Yup. Stolen straight from the armoury."

"... Do you think Ivete will let me...?"

"Again," Arthur would not have mentioned it if he hadn't stolen them with intent. "Take it up with Veríssimo."

[fexiexchanges]

🚨 sound the alarm 🚨

We have a new fic to read for Dead Fics Society!

For anyone who hasn't seen what's going on, we will be picking a different fexi fic and reading it as a way to pass the time during this hiatus and also spread some much deserved love to the wonderful writers in the fandom!

Drum roll please...

🥁🥁🥁

$2,000 for a month by picturesofu

Happy reading, friends ♥️

[subskz]

…i lost the tag limit war

the reader changing the subject the instant she feels seen by minho is such a subtle but valuable hint that i think says a lot abt the type of person she is, that moment really stood out to me! i know i literally just said this but right down to every minute detail, you've characterized both lino and the reader so masterfully it has to be the most enjoyable aspect of this story for me...and on top of that i just love how you write their conversations so much, they’re both such lil nerds…my intellectually stimulating smarties debating w each other even now 🥰 it all feels so comfortable and natural and draws me into their relationship w such ease!

their discussion abt colors is hands down one of my favorite scenes in all of invisible thread!! it's such an oddly heartwarming conversation and that perfect, out-of-the-box way of thinking that’s just so undeniably minho...it almost reminds me of synesthesia how he describes feelings through color! "the very essence of our humanity" "the orange that paints the sky when the sun is about to dip into the ocean" the way you embodied each colors through emotions/experiences was so wonderfully done, i understood each one instantly like it was a picture being visualized before my eyes. it makes it even more touching that minho and the reader come to understand each other on a whole new level through that way of communicating their moods <3 and for some reason when he gives the example "i feel like that moss green that no one seems to pay attention to" that really tugged at my heartstrings ㅠ it almost feels like he isnt just giving a hypothetical there, like he's giving a small glimpse into his true feelings without saying it outright. maybe he feels invisible deep down, too

them falling asleep together on facetime was so soft and tender ㅠㅠ leave it to lino to ramble abt sous-vide as a bedtime story and complain abt getting SCAMMED lmao the way that is actually smth he would say 😭 "he closes his eyes, thinking that maybe he just found the silence you talked about earlier on" this line got me so good ): it seems at first that he's bringing the reader peace but she's bringing him peace in her own way as well...her feelings abt his eyes changing from fear to longing is such a lovely detail and HER COMPLIMENTING THEM!!! HIS STUNNED REACTION </3 "this is the first genuine compliment he's ever received" oh my god does my moss green theory actually have any merit.....does he really feel invisible to the world too...do not do this to me sahar ㅠㅠ but the way he thinks such lovely, adoring things abt the reader in that moment but instead of voicing them he whines abt being hungry....so endearing and so HIM i cant get enough of how youve written minho here ur singlehandedly reminding me why he is allegedly the love of my life

the kintsugi mention made my heart leap in my chest!!! "when you look at that vase, you know it was once broken, but it doesn't take away from its beauty" please...that sentence in itself is so moving when you apply it to the context of what the reader has been through her whole life, not just a single crack but repeated breakages. and for it to come from someone like minho; it feels like exactly what the reader needs to hear to truly begin to heal herself...he doesn't coddle her but is still so gentle, putting things into perspective like nobody else can w his unique worldview and mental strength ㅠㅠ and i think i just lost my mind realizing that this scene loops right back to the clay comparison you drew at the beginning of the story oh my GOD....the reader is like a clay pot molded by her mother, broken in places and repaired over and over to create smth still damaged but just as valuable...and lino is the gold filling in the cracks....sahar you are INSANE for this one im kissing ur brain and tucking it gently into bed

the scene w minho in the rain 😞 i was not prepared to see my meow meow upset...but i love the way you wrote it so much. how oddly quiet he is, even to the point where he's not commenting in class or teasing her, and that's the key detail that lets the reader know smth's off w him...i also love that nothing in particular caused his low mood. it's such a human quality, and he allows himself to be human and feel his feelings until they pass. "he knew his emotions would regulate themselves" i cant explain why this line stood out to me so much i really love it, i think it's just such a shining example of minho's mindset...not necessarily optimistic, but practical enough to not be completely swamped by the darkness either. it creates such an interesting contrast to the reader's personality to see how they both handle their emotions, w her pushing hers away and him letting them run their course. but the fact that he typically tries to retreat into himself until he feels better, yet strangely enough, he doesn't mind it as much as he'd expect when the reader catches him in a vulnerable state...my babies ㅠ i also really loved the part where he uses her shower and thinks abt the scent of her soap as he washes up, it's so so sweet n intimate i'm such a sucker for things like that ): there are so many small things minho notices abt her like it's the most natural thing in the world, they're both so attentive of one another

"you were both just trying to make it through the day" and "he knew he wasn't invisible. at least not to you" were critical hits to my heart...it feels like a breakthrough in their relationship—the first time the reader truly truly sees minho, all sides of him, and she accepts them all without question <3

the gradual progression of their friendship is so gratifying to read bc of how organically you made it all flow together!! i adore the entire sequence that shows us how they start to care for each other more and more…the casual intimacy of the reader applying her lip tint to his lips (and him not studying for his quiz on purpose 😭💗 come ON) lino worrying abt her eating enough, the reader tying his bangs out of his eyes, complimenting him so matter-of-factly, and him BLUSHING ALL OVER THE PLACE it’s so over for me x2 they are so tender in their actions even when they tease each other nonstop. it all leads up so perfectly to the point in the story where minho finds himself being drawn to her apartment without even realizing it when he doesn't feel well. the subtle shift from him initially trying to shut her out bc he's so used to managing his bad days on his own, to him eventually leaning in to her kindness and seeking her company instead...and the way she just understands what he needs immediately, allows him to sit in silence and simply exist in peace next to her. describing his mood as "too much of every color" really struck a chord w me as well...i'm just so so in love w the running theme of colors you included throughout this story, it's such a brilliant way to put emotions into words <3

the lil parallels here n there from the beginning of their relationship until now are so cute as well; how lino makes breakfast for her the first time and leaves before she wakes up, but this time, he promises to stay and eat with her...to not be invisible ㅠㅠ i think what's making me craziest of all is how they're both so hyperaware of each other's touch. like when their shoulders brushed while sharing the reader's umbrella, how the reader suddenly finds it difficult to concentrate on her book when lino holds her wrist as she shields him from the sunlight...and little does she know it's the exact same for him too, like when she rested her head on his thigh and all he could focus on was the sensation of her hair tickling him 😭 they are so enamored w each other and have become so tangled up in each other little by little...they don't even fully realize it yet but they've made a permanent place in each other's lives now

"you were already on the other side, you realize. his eyes pulled you in and you were stuck in there, swimming in a pool of honey" oh my GOD!!! ㅠㅠㅠㅠ her feelings abt minho's eyes changing from fear, to longing, to at last the comfort of getting to see the other side of those black holes...this line hit me like a truck it might be my favorite from the entire fic ㅠ i have a feeling i'll be saying that abt many more lines to come when you verbalize things in the most poetic ways imaginable heheh but this one truly got me so good, the delicacy in which you describe minho makes the reader's growing affection for him all the more heart-fluttering~

minho hesitating to wipe her tears )): the way he's so careful abt touching her in any unwarranted way bc he can sense that she shies away from skinship is so devastatingly sweet...and then him pinching her right after to make her stop crying NEVERMIND I CANT STAND HIM ACTUALLY. but the way he consoles her is so endearing and so so minho...very simple and sincere, he knows her well enough to immediately figure out the best way to take her mind off of the issue instead of dwelling on it. "you didn't care what shape he was in, you just needed him to be in it" i've already pointed out so many lines oh my god i'm so sorry but each one is like another arrow through my heart ㅠㅠ i feel like this sentence is such a perfect testament to the reader and lino's relationship; they've both seen each other at their best and worst and it doesn't change anything abt their feelings, they care for each other unconditionally 😞 also the reader being afraid of physical touch bc she craves it is SO heartbreaking but so raw...i think it aligns so well w her past bc she's so used to either being invisible, or only being perceived negatively when she is perceived. it makes perfect sense how terrifying she'd find it to bare herself to minho when her whole life she's been deprived of genuine affection...you've really done such a phenomenal job of characterizing both her and lino i cant say it enough!

now...the entire final scene...where do i even begin...i had a feeling the climax of the story was going to hurt but not like this ㅠㅠ the reader's inner turmoil as she debates reaching out to her mother again, that conflicting mix of hating her yet somehow still missing her...it's such an inexplicable and confusing feeling for ppl who have experienced that kind of neglect but so so real and you captured it so candidly. it really added a whole new layer to the reader's humanity, for her to be unable to completely let go of their relationship no matter how painful it is to hold on to...for her to cling to the hope that maybe she could be worth smth to her mother if she did everything right ): i genuinely had the exact same reaction as her when you revealed that her mother had deleted her phone number...it felt precisely like a bucket of ice cold water to the head. the reader trying to pinpoint the exact moment in time where her mother stopped loving her was what really crushed me most...what a heart-wrenching sentence ㅠㅠ the fact that she's tried to hard to find solace in other places and people and tried to grow into her own person after entering university, but even so, those marks left from her childhood are still there...a vase full of cracks 💔 as much as it hurts to read, i love that you included this bump in the road of her healing journey and made a point to highlight that healing isn't linear

and minho 😭😭😭😭😭 the way he handled the reader's outburst is so touching...the way he's immediately able to recognize that her feelings are misplaced and smth much deeper is going on beyond what he sees on the surface...using that astuteness to put his own feelings to the side in the moment is so minho. this entire scene is just blossoming with powerful lines i can't forget, but i was especially affected by the reader saying "i'd need you and i can't afford to need someone else." it's such a tragic summarization of her in my opinion...how she went her whole life being unable to rely on anyone but herself, so the moment she's faced w minho, all her instincts say to reject it no matter how badly she craves that intimacy ㅠㅠ and lino saying "i'll be by your side for as long as you'll have me" is such a beautiful declaration of love...it's so selfless and unconditional, and it fits so seamlessly w how their relationship progressed throughout the story, how they were by each other's sides at their best and worst moments.

"the world doesn't stop because we need it to" "we'll make it stop" and then describing their kiss as like "seeing color for the first time"...i'm going to melt into an inconsolable puddle over all these callbacks to their first date together don't think i didn't catch the ways you weaved those in throughout this final scene..you made it feel so complete, like things have come full circle. i already mentioned how much i loved their conversation abt describing colors to the blind, so for their first kiss to be written that way, like the reader was blind to the true color of the world until she met minho....i am going to be ill that is so intensely romantic sahar ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

"he was the invisible thread stitching your wounds back together." another heartaching line ): what a way to personify the quiet love minho provides...it may be invisible to everyone else, but not to her

i'm so sorry for my horrifically long comment haha but i'm just thrilled i was finally able to read this beautiful fic 😞 just as i'd predicted, you're a phenomenal writer!! the amount of love and effort you poured into it went above and beyond, i hope you're so proud of yourself for creating such a stunning work!! it's very clear to me how every interaction you wrote between minho and the reader was so carefully thought out and so meaningful to the overarching theme of the story, it's all done with care and purpose and there's smth special to be found in each line of dialogue! it's like you carefully stacked more and more on to the foundation of their bond until before we know it, there's an entire home there that they built steadily together. that kind of subtle progression is my absolute favorite thing. i'm also so blown away by how the reader's mother, though never actually making an appearance until the final scene, has such an heavy impact over the narrative. it's like she's a ghost haunting the reader's every action, every decision, every inner thought...i find it so impressive how you were able to incorporate that effect into the story without us even needing to meet the mother! and i must've mentioned countless lines that stuck w me throughout the fic, but just know that there are countless more i could've pointed out as well...you truly write so so beautifully. so poetic and emotive, but also not so flowery that it becomes hard to follow, i'm truly floored by your ability to achieve that perfect balance! on top of the story being so immersive in itself, your writing style made invisible thread such a genuine delight to read <3

this feels like the kind of story i'll be thinking abt for a long time after finishing it, the kind to revisit over n over bc i'm sure there are so many lil easter eggs you included that i may have missed! i'm positive i'll come back to it many times in the future hehe...but i can't wait to read more of your writing as well! ^_^

Invisible thread- one

pairing : minho x reader

genre : university au, academic rivals to lovers (rivals not enemies because they respect each other), slow burn, fluff, angst.

warnings : reader has a very bad relationship with her mother, insecurities, talk about murder but as a joke, mention of alcohol, reader has she/her pronouns.

summary : Your studies were your lifeline for as long as you can remember. What happens when Minho comes into your life and rips it away from you?

word count : 20k

Author's note : I've been working on this fic on and off for the past two months, so if you do enjoy reading, please let me know. asks, comments, reblogs i read them all and they truly make me the happiest <3 (also i based this off my own college experience, where we study two terms and there is one person on top of the class every semester)

part two

You have always been first in your class.

Not because you particularly enjoyed studying. You simply felt that your worth was solely tied to the marks on your papers.

You never wanted to crumble under the pressure of studies, to hole yourself up in your room for an assignment you won’t remember in a month. But achieving good grades was the only way for you to feel seen; to make someone stop in their tracks and acknowledge you. 

A simple “good job” that you preserved inside your mind, as a reminder that you did exist to other people. Considering that the majority of your life was spent in silence. 

Your mom put a roof above your head and food on your table, but she never asked about your day, nor did she seem to care. You felt as though you were no more important to her than the tapestry hanging on your wall.

At times, you imagined that if you stood close enough to that tapestry, you could merge with it as one. The intricate embroidery would wrap around you and draw you in. And your mother wouldn’t notice. She would regard you with the same indifference she showed towards that textile- a mere decoration, at times a nuisance when she had to dust it.

You always ate your dinner alone. When you scraped your knee, you tended to the wound by yourself. No one attended your childhood musicals, and you patted your back when you cracked an egg without dropping a shell into the bowl. 

You’ve come to learn since your young age that all your milestones, both small and significant, would be celebrated alone. 

On the rare times your mother would acknowledge your presence, she’d unleash a flurry of criticism your way as if she was eagerly awaiting the opportunity to strike you down. She'd toss crude comments over her shoulder as easily as a casual hello, leaving you feeling battered and bruised in her wake. 

You felt as if you were shoreline rocks, and your mother was the ocean. You never knew if she would be like a gentle tide, barely brushing against you, or an enraged storm, mercilessly crashing down on your being. And you weren't sure which one was worse: to be invisible or to be seen and despised.  

That’s why you grew up plagued with self-doubt. You made friends throughout your school years but you never allowed them to get close enough to really see you -you feared that they might glimpse the very thing your mother seemed to despise in you. 

Throughout your childhood, you were like soft clay in your mother's hands- pliable, and easy to mold. And she indented you, everywhere, carved in edges and dips where they should not have been ones. Handled you roughly when you should have been treated with care. And as the years went by, you hardened- much like clay, but her touch remained imprinted upon you. It was difficult at times to discern who you were and who she made you to be.

You tried to start anew when you went away to university; to rewire your brain into believing that you were enough- you exist and you shouldn't prove to anyone that you deserved to be alive. But her words haunted you, they were like skeletons in your closet- but the closet was you. You could never part from them.

So, you fell back into the same pattern of seeking good grades and congratulatory words from your professors. Every A+ you got infused you with a momentary sense of worthiness.

But unlike in high school, you weren't always the best. Your competition came in the form of a single man named Minho, who seemed to excel in every class you shared.

Minho was mostly quiet, but whenever he spoke, you found that his words carried weight. Your professors consistently agreed with his points, and you envied the confidence he exuded. You wondered what it must feel like to be so sure of oneself.

It wasn't until a month into the year that you had your first interaction with Minho. You were in your Constitutional Law class when your professor Kim brought up the notion of ‘Separation of Powers’. You were arguing that judges shouldn’t be included in the writings of law when you heard a scoff from the row behind you. You turned around, raising a brow at the culprit, "Is there something you’d like to say?" you asked.

And in response, Minho smiled lazily, an air of smugness surrounding him, "I just don’t agree." The professor urged him to explain himself, so he leaned back into his chair, eyeing you. "Judges are the ones who practice the law every day, and sometimes they find that none of the written texts fit their case. If they get involved in lawmaking, they can help address those gaps or uncertainties." 

"Who's to say that those judges aren’t biased or politically motivated? They’ll end up writing laws to fit their own preferences," you pointed out, raising an eyebrow at him. "We elect judges to interpret and apply laws, not make them. If they start writing laws too, we'll be violating the separation of powers between the legislative and judicial branches. That's what keeps our entire system from crumbling."

Minho rested his chin on his hand, tapping his cheek thoughtfully with his index finger. "Aren’t legislators prone to biases too? Your point doesn’t stand then," he challenged, tilting his head to the side, "and judges can participate without going overboard. They can provide input on proposed laws without actually drafting them. That way, we ensure that the laws are crafted with a clear understanding of how they'll be put into practice." 

"If your main concern is to ensure that the laws are impartial, we have people who work as consulting experts whose job is exactly that," you flashed him an innocent smile, firing back. "Also, wouldn’t these overstepping branches put the judges in a position to be perceived in a bad light? Is that what you want?"

Before Minho could respond, Mr. Kim intervened, putting an end to your debate, "Let's save this energy for your essays and see who can convince me more."

You gave a quick nod, swiveling in your seat without a backward glance. However, you could sense Minho’s gaze penetrating through your back- as if he was trying to read your most intimate thoughts. 

That was the first thing you noticed about Minho when he walked over to you. His eyes were brown, not a special color by any means. But they held a certain depth to them that seemed to draw you in like a black hole. You weren't sure what you would find on the other side, nor did you have any desire to find out.

He outstretched his hands towards you, stopping you in your tracks. "Minho," he introduced and your hand met his in a firm grip. The second thing you noticed about him was the coldness of his hand, as it wrapped tightly around your palm. 

Suddenly you were taken back to when you built a snowman for the first and last time. You were just seven and the ice was freezing, numbing your fingers as you worked. Your mother never told you that you should’ve worn mittens, or a thick jacket to fight off the cold when she saw you walking out of the house. The memory of your cold hands and the horrible illness that followed still left a bitter taste in your mouth, like an unripe fruit. With a jolt you dropped his hand, forcefully pulling yourself away from that memory. 

"Yn," you said back, and he smiled to himself, repeating your name slowly, each syllable dripping from his tongue.  

"We'll see who'll write the best essay, right?" he asked, clearly challenging you. There was a gleam of excitement in his eyes that reminded you of a child gazing up at cotton candy. 

That was the third thing you noticed about Minho; how expressive his eyes were. They moved with his every word, punctuating them. 

He was infuriating but also amusing. You've never had a clear competitor in your life. Or maybe you had, but you didn't notice them. You were always so reclined on yourself, trying to survive the day, you didn't pay enough attention to your surroundings.

"You want to compete with me?" You asked, and he smirked, leaning against the door, arms crossed in front of his chest. "What? Scared you’d lose?"

"Please." You rolled your eyes at his taunting, "Don’t come crying when I win."

"We’ll see about that!" He shouted after you as you walked ahead, leaving him behind.

This essay was insignificant. A simple way for your professor to assess your knowledge and work approach. And yet, you found yourself staying up all night to complete it. There was no way you were going to let Minho take this one thing from you.

Who were you if not the best in your studies? You were deathly afraid to find out. 

Later on that week, the professor handed you your grade back, 98%. You turned around to show Minho your mark, and so did he. You surpassed him, only by mere percents. "I told you so," you smiled cheekily and he pouted, holding a hand to his heart as if your grade wounded him.

"I'll beat you next time", he mouthed and you chuckled, "Whatever helps you sleep at night."

✹✹✹

The first time you studied with Minho was in a cat café near campus, called Limbo, about two weeks after your initial interaction. You stumbled upon it serendipitously while strolling through your university town. You couldn’t study at home, since you were easily distracted in there, and the eerie silence of libraries often left you unsettled.

Limbo, however, offered the perfect middle-ground: it was calm, not overly crowded, and the buzzing of the coffee machine blended harmoniously with the occasional mewls of cats, which helped you concentrate better. 

You were sitting in a secluded corner table at the café's back, a sleeping black cat comfortably nestled in your lap when you sensed a shadow loom over you. You glanced up quickly to find Minho. He was clad in a grey hoodie sporting a bunny holding up its middle finger. You had to bite your cheek to suppress a grin at his clothing attire.

"What are you doing here?" He asked. 

"You know for someone smart you sure ask stupid questions," you remarked, already looking down at the papers scattered in front of you.

He huffed, taking a seat at the table right next to yours, "I can’t believe that of all places you’ve found this café to study in."

"My apologies, am I disturbing you, your highness?" You asked sarcastically, and in retort, Minho mimicked your words in a high-pitched tone. You threw the pillow right next to you at his head, and Minho swiftly ducked, easily avoiding it. He chuckled loudly while you glared at his laughing figure. That was the end of your conversation that day. 

From that moment forward, it became a routine for the two of you to study at Limbo, every Saturday, without fault. You didn’t explicitly plan on it, but it seemed that both of you found it comforting to work there. And you could also tell that, unlike you, it wasn’t Minho’s first time coming to Limbo. He was friends with the owner, a sweet middle-aged man who offered you pastries whenever you stayed there until closing. The cats seemed to know him too, they mewled at his feet whenever he entered and he always greeted them with a soft smile on his face. 

You didn’t talk much in those unofficial study sessions, the both of you were consumed by your own work. But you’d steal quick glances at him every now and then, the sight of him so concentrated only fueled you to work harder.

Admittedly, your competition left you feeling anxious for days on end at first. Each time Minho came out on top, you’d found yourself losing your grip. Your studies have been the one anchor keeping you afloat your entire life, and now, Minho was ripping it carelessly away from you. So, you resented him- you were human after all.

But then, you realized that Minho’s taunting wasn’t malicious. He wasn’t competing with you to hurt you, he was doing it for amusement only.

You've slowly started to learn that despite his relentless teasing, Minho had a gentle aura surrounding him. Glimpses of which occasionally emerged like rays of sunshine piercing through a thick cloud cover.

True, he chuckled when you accidentally bumped your head on the table while retrieving a fallen pen. Yet, you also noticed how he began to cover the table's corners with his hand whenever you bent down. He swiftly retracted his hand, seemingly believing you didn't notice, but you did.

During class presentations, he deliberately prepared challenging questions for you, urging you to study twice as hard to ensure no stone was left unturned. Yet, whenever the professor praised your performance, Minho offered a subtle thumbs-up as a gesture of support. He winked at you each time he got the right answer and you didn’t. However, when he noticed you struggling with a particular subject, he scooted closer and patiently explained it to you. He got up before you could thank him, swatting his arm in the air as if he didn’t do anything of significance. 

To show your appreciation, you bought him a drink that day he helped you—a simple gesture that sparked an ongoing game of "win a bet, get free food". You bet on who would receive the first mark on an assignment or who would finish an essay first- anything to further deepen the competition between you.

That's how you came to know that he loved puddings, among other things.

Curiously, as the months went by, your mind began to retain these little details about him. How his eyelashes fluttered like butterfly wings when he blinked repeatedly during your conversations. How he glanced at the ceiling when lost in deep thought as if he was waiting for the answers to descend from the sky. Or how his lips take on the shape of an "o" while thinking of his response during one of your many debates. But you supposed that it was natural to take notice of such things when you spend countless Saturday afternoons with the same person.

You were still studying for someone else, in the sense that each time you stayed up working, it was solely to prove your worth to Minho. But at least unlike your mother, Minho's words never haunted you at night.

✹✹✹

Just like that, four months have gone by since you joined your university as a law major. It was nearing finals week and you were preparing it at Limbo. Minho was naturally present too, at his usual table right next to yours.

On the last weekend before the beginning of your finals, you were head-deep into your Criminal Law documents when Minho abruptly got up from his seat and settled in the chair in front of you.

"Yn," he whispers and you glance at him, "What?" 

"I have an idea."

"Keep it to yourself," you grin sarcastically, only for him to pick up your spoon and move it around in a threatening manner.

"Are you trying to scare me with a spoon?" you chuckle in disbelief.

 "Anything can be a weapon if you use enough force."

"Okay… that was creepy. What do you want?"

"The end of the first term is coming up. So, to celebrate our little rivalry-"

"It's not a rivalry if I’m always winning," you cut him off.

"Yeah, that’s why I have a fridge full of pudding."

"But-"

"Anyways, how about the top of the class takes the other out for dinner? A fancy one." He suggests, his gaze fixed on you.

"No, thank you. I already see you enough in classes."

"Didn’t think you wouldn’t up for a bet. Guess I was wrong," he remarks, a cheeky smile drawn on his lips. He knows you couldn’t possibly say no now.  

"Fine," you roll your eyes at his proud expression. "Prepare your wallet." 

"Mm, sure," he responds, before rising from his seat once more.

That day, you both lost track of time as you studied in Limbo until it closed down. When you finally stepped outside, stretching your tired limbs, you were met with the sight of falling snowflakes.

"Nooo, go away. I don't want to watch the first snow with you," Minho whines, referring to the superstition that watching the first snowfall with someone could spark love between the two of you. 

"As if I could ever love you," you laugh at the ridiculous idea, "that’d just be signing a death warrant."

You resume walking towards your apartment when suddenly something freezing and hard hits your back with enough force to make you stagger. Turning around slowly, you find Minho erupting in laughter, his body filled with uncontainable joy. He’s jumping and clapping excitedly, and for a fleeting moment, you can’t decide if your shock was from the impact or from how beautiful happiness looks on him. 

Snapping out of your daze, you swiftly retaliate by scooping up a handful of snow and hurling it at him. "Now you are cold too!" you shout, while he’s still laughing uncontrollably. 

Thus begins an impromptu snowball fight between the two of you. Unsurprisingly, you’re being competitive in this too, trying your best to strike each other before the other could recover. But Minho draws nearer to you, and in your desperation to win, you fall to the ground when he throws a snowball at your chest, gasping as if you’re in pain.

"Shit, did I hurt you?" Minho quickly kneels in front of you, concern evident in his voice. It surprises you for a moment- how worried he seems at the prospect of causing you pain.

But you shake that thought off and push him down to the ground, a proud smile on your face. In his fall, Minho instinctively reaches for you to steady himself, which ends up with you landing on top of him. Your faces are mere inches apart, and a soft gasp escapes your mouth at your sudden proximity.

Minho has a mole on his nose. You’ve never noticed that before. 

You quickly push yourself off of him, not enjoying being this close to somebody. "Why did you drag me down with you?" you grumble, shaking off the snow from your hair.

"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes," he cheekily stuck out his tongue, and you respond with the same childlike gesture before the both of you burst into loud laughter. The sound reverberates through your entire being, and it echoes in your mind long after the two of you go your separate ways.  

As you lay in bed that night, ready to drift off to sleep, a quiet realization dawns on you. This was the first time you've touched snow in since your childhood incident.

That unpleasant memory didn't cross your mind once. Instead, all you thought about was Minho’s infectious laughter, and the surprising warmth it stirred within you.

✹✹✹

You came first in your grade this semester.

True to his words, Minho texted you the name of the restaurant where you’d both meet to celebrate your win. As you got ready for your outing, you couldn’t help the nerves creeping up on you. Studying in silence next to Minho was something, going to a friendly dinner with him was another. You feared it would be too awkward and Minho would regret ever proposing such a thing.

So, as you sit in the refined BBQ restaurant waiting for him, you fidget with your hands, counting down to three in your head in an attempt to steady your breathing.

You were clearly not accustomed to existing with Minho outside of the confines of your studies.

"Did you wait long?" Minho asks as he finally pulls the chair in front of you and you shake your head no.

"Are you nervous?" he chuckles at your lack of words, and you frown, suddenly feeling defensive. "Why would I be nervous? This isn't a date."

"Who said anything about a date?" he smirks and you grab your fork threateningly, pointing it at him, "Don't say anything stupid or I will walk out."

"And stand me up on our first date? That's too mean.” He pouts, a hand on his heart and you can’t help but giggle at his antics. You were ridiculous for being nervous. This was Minho, the one person you’ve talked to the most since the start of this year. 

"What will you have?" he asks and you smile mischievously.

 "Most expensive thing on the menu."

"So you are only here for the food." 

"Well, it's certainly not for your company," you wink and he chuckles, his bunny teeth on full display. 

"And here I thought we were going to be civil with each other."

"When are we ever not?" you gasp dramatically and Minho swats your hand with the menu. "Just order whatever," you finally answer," I trust your food judgment."

"I could poison you, you know?" He smiles proudly and you roll your eyes at him, "Can’t you be normal, for once?"

Minho calls over the waiter and places your orders. The food is quick to arrive and Minho starts to grill up the meat, while you cut the Kimchi into smaller pieces. 

"Here," he puts the perfectly cooked rib onto your plate first and you smile at him, "Thank you."

"Eat up, don’t wait for me," he tells you and you nod, tasting the flavorful meat.

"Wow this is really good," you compliment and he smirks proudly at your words, "I know."

Minho places four other ribs for you, without eating one himself. You start to feel bad, so you grab his chopsticks, pick up the meat, and move it toward his mouth, "Open up."

"What?" He asks confused and you wave the food in front of his face, "Come on, you haven’t eaten anything."

Minho parts his lips slowly, and you feed the tender meat to him, before eating one yourself. You notice how his cheeks are slightly tinted pink now, and you account it to the intense heat of the grill.

"Oh, let's not talk about studies, my brain can't take another debate with you," you tell Minho in between bites and he grins at you, a gleam of excitement in his eyes. "If you were to dispose of a body, how would you do it?"

"I think our next celebration will be in an asylum." you smile too sweetly at him and he stares at you pointedly, "Please, I know you've already thought about it."

"Fine. Probably in a deserted land. What about you?"

"I'd cut their bodies and then bury each part in a different forest. In a different city."

His answer came too quickly, and you pause in your tracks, "Should I be worried?"

"You are too cute to kill." His tone is sarcastic and you make a show of gushing at his compliment, clasping both of your hands in front of your heart, "Growing soft on me, Minho?" 

"Yeah, I’m basically sooo in love with you," he replies with a smirk and you roll your eyes at him, an amused smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.

"What's your favorite color?" you finally ask, changing the subject.

"Purple."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You'll buy me purple flowers?" He coos at you and you shake your head as you grab the utensil from his hand, to grill the meat your turn. 

"No. I'll paint your tombstone purple," you grin and he laughs loudly, eyes squinted close, and you can't find it in you to care that the people next to you are staring. 

"What's yours?" he asks when he calms down and you shrug, "Navy blue, I think."

"You do remind me of navy blue."

"And why is that?"

"When you look at it, at first glance, it looks like black. But the more you stare at it, the more layers you uncover. Just like you. There’s more to you than what meets the eye."

You grab your glass of water, gulping it down to hide the way your eyes just glossed over. You suddenly felt bare in front of Minho. How did he know?

You clear your throat, racking your brain for a way to move on from that question. "If you were to describe colors to a blind person, how would you do it?"

"Mm," he looks up at the ceiling as he mulls over your question, "I’d say that yellow is the feeling of eating ice cream on a sunny day, in an amusement park. Your fingers are sticky but your cheeks ache from how much you smiled that day."

"Yellow is carefree and happy."

"Exact. Now your turn, red."

"I’d say that... Red is the thrill that rushes through your veins when you do something you are passionate about, you know? It’s what makes our blood boil and our heart race. The very essence of our humanity."

Minho smiles softly at your words, seemingly agreeing with your description. "Don’t you think it would be easier if we simply asked, what color are you feeling today, instead of a 'How are you'?" He questions and you tilt your head to the side, "What do you mean?"

"Well, you could say, I feel like that moss green that no one seems to pay attention to. Or, I feel bright yellow as if the world's energy is stored inside me."

"And right now, how do you feel?"

"I feel orange, not the ugly orange." He precises and you chuckle, "the orange that paints the sky when the sun is about to dip into the ocean."

"A bittersweet orange, an ending that instantly strings along a new beginning. And you don't have time to rest."

Minho places his chin on his palm, eyeing you curiously, "Is that what you want? To rest?"

"Yeah." You admit quietly, "Don't you sometimes wish that the world would just stop, for a few seconds? Just like in a song, right before the beat drops. That silence, I wish I could live inside of it."

"I do too."

You both hold each other’s gaze for a while after that. You felt as if he was keeping you captive with his brown eyes, and he was slowly peeling each of your layers, in silence, as you were peeling his. For the first time, you think that you and he are similar, more than on a studies level. There was a part of his soul that understood yours perfectly. And it felt good, to be understood, for once.

"If you lived in this silence, what would you be doing?" he asks, breaking the serene quiet that surrounded you.

"I’d open a café that had books. And there'd be a little space, where people could paint. Or do pottery. And I’d have cats in there too." You reply excitedly, hands moving around in the air, you end up missing the way Minho gazes fondly at you before his smile morphs into a smirk.

"Please tell me you won't be cooking."

"Shut up. What about you?"

"I’d be a dancer."

"You dance?!" you whisper-shout and he frowns at the surprised look on your face. 

"Yeah. Why are you looking at me like this?"

"I just never expected it. Can I-"

"No." he cuts you off immediately and you pout. 

"I didn't even finish."

"I knew what you were going to say."

"Please, I won't make a sound I’d just watch. Pinky promise.” He grabs your now outstretched pinky with the tip of his index and thumb, lowering it down. 

"I’d only grant you this wish when you’re on your deathbed."

"Bold of you to assume you'd still be around."

"Death might be around the corner."

"Stop it."

"Close your door tonight."

"You are deranged."

Minho chuckles at the crestfallen look on your face, "I’ll think about it."

Just like that, three hours of talking have gone by, the conversation flowing easily between the two of you. And when you finally leave the restaurant, Minho grabs you a cab and you wave him off with a smile. You couldn't lie to yourself, you had a really good time with him. You liked to think that Minho was no longer just a rival, but a possible friend.

But now that you were laying in your bed, you couldn’t help but curse Minho in your brain. His repetitive talk about murder made you paranoid, and now every creak in your apartment made you feel as if death was really right around the corner. 

You decide to text him, figuring that if you couldn’t sleep because of him, you could at least disturb him for a bit. 

Yn : I hate you I'm paranoid from your murder talk

Minho : Poor baby

Yn : Is that you at my door?

Suddenly your phone rings, the shrill sound echoing around your apartment. It was a Facetime call from Minho. You panic for a few seconds, before remembering that you just spent your entire night with him. A call can’t be more daunting than a real-life meeting. 

"See, I’m in my home," he tells you as soon as you pick up and you laugh.

"It's pitch black, I can't see."

"Just say you miss my face." You can’t see him but you can clearly hear the proud grin in his voice. 

"What's there to miss?"

"Are you actually scared?" Minho asks gently and you clear your throat, feeling ridiculous all of the sudden. 

"There is a tree right outside my window and it keeps rustling from the wind," you grumble and Minho laughs at you. 

"Trees can't hurt you."

"No shit Sherlock."

"Close your eyes.” He instructs and you frown at his words. 

"Why?"

"I’ll tell you a story."

"Fine.” You close your eyes tentatively. It’s quiet for a few seconds and you feel yourself relax slightly. 

"So, I bought a sous-vide machine and-"

"Is your bedtime story going to be about meat?"

"Yes?” He replies as if it’s an evidence, “Now be quiet." You pretend to zip your mouth and Minho faintly giggles, before resuming his story. "So, I was saying. I bought one and I wanted to experience different kinds of meats. So, I bought a 30-day aged one and a 58-day aged one and I cooked them both."

"What did you use?" you ask quietly. 

"Just garlic, and thyme, I didn't want to overpower the taste of meat. Anyways I cooked them, but I didn't have plastic bags so I had to go out and buy them."

"Mm," you hum in acknowledgment. You could feel your nerves slowly dissipate with Minho's every word. His story might be ridiculous but his honey-coated voice compensated for it, wrapping around you like a protective cocoon. 

"And I found pudding there so I had to buy it."

"Obviously," you whisper. Sleep was knocking on your door, but paradoxically you tried to fight it off. You wanted to hear the rest of Minho’s story. 

"And I went back home and I cooked it, then I plated it nicely with vegetables that I sauteed with butter and garlic. Just mushrooms and potatoes, nothing too fancy. Again, my main focus was the meat. But there wasn't a difference between the two. They tasted the same for me, for some reason. And I didn't like this because the aged one was very expensive. Maybe I was scammed. Honestly, that butcher looked kind of suspicio..."

Your quiet snores make Minho pause in his tracks, and he laughs quietly. You did end up falling asleep. He can't see your face clearly, but he can see its outline and he stares at you for a while. You look peaceful.

He goes to hang up but his finger hovers over the 'end call' button. You aren't talking, but your hums are quiet enough that they fill up the space around him. It calms him down, and he lets his head fall on the pillow, his phone lying beside him.

He closes his eyes, thinking that maybe he just found the silence you talked about earlier on. 

You just made his world stop.

✹✹✹

The second semester had just started and with it the return of frat parties. You were excited at the prospect of going to one with your new friend Mina. You met her in the library when you both went to grab the same book. You quickly apologized but she waved you off, handing you the book with a huge smile on her face. She was bubbly, like a human serotonin boost, and she started gushing about how much she loved the author. You saw her again in the campus cafeteria, and she skipped towards you as if you've both known each other your entire life. That was the start of your friendship.

You walk into the frat house, both your arms encircling each other. The flashing lights of the party blind you for a moment, and it takes you a while to adjust to the loud music bouncing off of the walls. But you like it, it was like a shield from the outside world and its problems. 

You feel yourself letting loose in the crowd, swaying your hips to the music. Mina spins you around and you laugh, dancing with no care in the world. It was just the both of you in that instant. 

Mina spots Jeongin in the crowd, a friend of hers that she had an immense crush on. You couldn’t blame her- he was very attractive; his easy smirk and his blonde tousled hair earned him lots of appreciative looks from the people around him. But when his eyes locked with Mina’s, you found that his face morphed into a beautiful smile, that made his dimples look on full display, as if it was only reserved for her.

“Go get your man!” You shout in her ears, so she’d be able to hear you. 

“What are you talking about?” She yells back, but you could see the nervous smile on her face.

“He likes you! Go talk to him!”

“I don’t want to leave you alone. We came together!” She clasps your hand in hers and you smile touched by her kind spirit.

“I’ll be fine. I’ll go to the kitchen to get some drinks. Go have fun!”

“You are sure?” She asks, her eyes darting between you and Jeongin, who was still looking at her, and her only. 

“Yes! Go!” You say, gently pushing her away. Mina jogs up to Jeongin who greets her with a side hug. He quickly glances at you and you shoot him a thumbs-up, to which he grins. You loved playing Cupid.

With that, you decide to head to the kitchen to grab a drink. You pick a beer from the fridge, double-checking if the can is closed before opening it. 

You lean on the countertop, sipping on your drink while you watch the crowd, humming along each time a song you knew played. You enjoyed watching people dance freely from afar, with no apparent care in the world.

You feel someone stand next to you and you brace yourself, getting ready to tell the person off if they decide to bother you. You didn’t have the energy for mindless flirting. But then, you smell the cologne that has lingered around you for the past term- Minho. You haven't seen him since your dinner. That was a month ago.

"Fancy seeing you here," he greets as he leans on the counter right next to you, his eyes fixated on the mingling bodies.

You turn around to face him, faking an outraged gasp, "Are you following me?"

"Mmm. You look nice", he compliments and you smile cheekily, "I know."

"Won't tell me I look nice too?" he smirks, leaning closer to your face. "Someone didn’t get enough compliments tonight?" You pout, placing a hand on your heart in mock concern.

"I did, but I want to hear it from you. You’re the only sensible person in this room."

"You look nice. Now leave me alone."

"Come on, I know you can do better than that", he jokes and you roll your eyes, muttering “You’re annoying”, under your breath.

Still, you comply, placing your arms on top of the counter and leaning your head on them to get a better look at him. He does the same, smiling, and you both stare at each other for a while after that.

The strobing lights dance on Minho’s face, casting enticing shadows on him. You've always known he was a beautiful man; you've looked into his eyes far too many times in your heated conversations. But this time was different, there was no cheeky smirk on his face nor a furrow in his eyebrows. He was simply looking at you, and it made a pool of warmth huddle in your belly. You feel yourself relax under his gaze, everything around you seemingly melts away.

You weren’t wrong when you thought that his eyes were like a black hole, pulling you in. But this time, you realize that you didn’t mind knowing what was on the other side. On the contrary, you longed for it. 

"I like your eyes right now. They remind me of the night sky. Black, with tiny little stars littered in them," you finally say.

Minho is taken aback by your words, he wasn't expecting you to compliment him, let alone to tell him something so special. He can feel his cheeks burn red at your words, feel his heart hammering in his chest. He's afraid you can hear it too.

He doesn't know what to say, so instead he clears his throat, plastering a smirk on his face, "I heard better." He hasn't. This is the first genuine compliment he's ever gotten.

"Oh, fuck off," you laugh and he joins you. The music was loud and yet the only sound his ear seemed to pick up was your laugh.

"Are you here alone?" He asks, and you shake your head no, "Came with my friend Mina."

"Did she leave you by yourself?" He frowns and you feel yourself warm up at his worried tone. "I told her to go talk to Jeongin."

"Next time, don’t stay alone."

“Fine, Dad.” You chastise and he stares pointedly at you, "I’m serious, yn."

You take another swing of the beer before turning your body fully towards Minho. After a few beats of silence, you finally ask a question that has been on your mind for a while. "Why do you say my name this way?"

"What way?" He questions and you shrug, "Slowly. People used to always rush it but you don’t."

"Well, it’s a pretty name. It deserves to be pronounced as a whole."

You beam at his words; you smile so brightly it makes his heart skip a beat. This is the first time you’ve grinned this widely at him, no hand in front of your mouth as if to hide it. He did notice how you were a reserved person outside of class, as if you were afraid of taking up too much place. But he could tell you were slowly unraveling, growing bolder with each passing month. He wanted to tell you that if people like you spoke more, the world would be a far better place. 

But he couldn't bring himself to say all of this, so he forced those bubbling words down his throat. "I’m hungry," he whines instead and you laugh at his pout. "I'm kind of craving a greasy pizza."

"Should we go buy it? You can tell Mina to come so we can walk her back."

"I’ll ask her."

You shoot Mina a text, asking her where she was and telling her about your plan. She replies that she’s with Jeongin who just offered to take her home, so you could leave without her.

"We can go." You tell him and he nods. Minho shrugs his leather jacket off, gently placing it on your shoulders. His warmth engulfs you and you sink further into it. His arm hovers around your shoulder not touching you as he leads you out of the party. He has never touched your body, you note, it's like he was everywhere and nowhere at once.

You both walk to an open parlor near the frat house, and you order a Margarita pizza to share. You sit down on a nearby bench to eat it- the night breeze too liberating to pass up on.

As you both finish eating, a cat with white and orange stripes all over her body approaches the both of you cautiously, and you pat her head softly. "Aren't you the cutest thing ever?" you coo and Minho chuckles as he scratches the cat’s chin. She purrs at his touch appreciatively, and you smile at the soft look on his face. 

"Never knew you to be this gentle", you giggle and Minho shushes you, "Let's not do this in front of the cat."

"Why are you acting as if we are a divorced couple and she’s our child."

"Easy, yn. You make it sound as if you want me to marry you."

"Now you're just projecting," you chastise and he laughs, eliciting giggles from you. He had a melodic laugh, you noticed, and you always felt a surge of pride whenever you made him close his eyes and tip his head from laughter. You felt as if it's a sight only you can see.

"I have three cats", he says softly and you gasp, "Really? We spent all of our Sundays in a cat café and this is when you tell me?"

"I only tell my friends."

"So we're friends now?" You gush and he rolls his eyes at you, "I take it back."

"What’s their names?" You ask curiously and his eyes soften at your question- you could easily tell he loved them dearly.

"Soongie, Doongie, and Dori. They are rescues."

"That’s very sweet of you Minho."

"Most of my scars come from them though," he chuckles but you sober up at his words, quietly scratching the cat's ears.

"What’s on your mind?" He asks and you glance at him. It was scary how well he’s starting to know you. But it was also nice; to be known is to exist, after all.

"I just... Sometimes I wish that memories would leave physical scars on you. Because at least then, you could treat them, put a band-aid on, and watch them fade away day by day. Because when the scars are emotional, you can’t treat them, you know? And someday someone brings up a name or a place, or you smell a certain scent, and suddenly they reopen as if no time has gone by at all.”

Minho stays silent for a while, mulling over your words. You don't mind, you weren't expecting him to comfort you. You just needed to free those words from the mental prison you've held them in for so long.

"Do you know Kintsugi?" he finally asks and you shake your head no.

"It's a Japanese art. They put back together broken vases with molten gold. It represents strength despite our flaws."

"That sounds nice," you sigh wistfully and he nods. 

"It is. When you look at that vase, you know that it was once broken, but it doesn't take away from its beauty, on the contrary, it adds to it. Scars, whether they are emotional or physical are there for a reason. They remind us of how we pushed through whatever life threw at us."

"Am I supposed to be grateful I survived this?" You chuckle lowly, as your hand scratches the cat’s ear. Your fingers brush against Minho’s and you hesitate for a few seconds before moving them away.

"I wouldn't say grateful for what you went through," he speaks once again, "but grateful to yourself. At the end of the day, the reason why you're still here is you. You put yourself back together," he then bumps his elbow into your side softly, "and hey, even if your scars reopen there will come a time when they wouldn’t anymore. Sometimes, it takes a while to be okay again."

This was Minho’s way of telling you that someday it wouldn’t hurt anymore. That someday you’d be okay. And you needed to hear that. You needed to hear someone else other than yourself tell you that.

"Thank you, Minho, I needed that", you smile at him and he grins back at you before his smile turns to a smirk. "I charge 15 dollars for the hour by the way."

"Oh, come on! You didn't even say something revolutionary." You are lying. Minho's words will echo in your mind long after this night- a beacon of light to hold onto.

"Oh, so now it’s no longer ‘I needed that’. Tsk," he jokes a smirk still plastered on his face.

"Okay, Mr. Therapist. I’ll pay for your coffee tomorrow, sounds good?"

"I should have you as my client more often," he winks and you laugh, head tipped back. You were grateful more than ever for his teasing, loving how it wasn’t awkward between you after your discussion.

"You are a good listener." You tell him as you stand up, dusting your pants.

"I’m good at everything," he grins cheekily at you and you roll your eyes playfully, "And here I thought we were having a moment."

You both start walking side by side toward your home when Minho speaks again. His tone is quiet as if he wasn’t sure he wanted you to hear him. "About earlier, your compliment, I mean. I suppose I didn't thank you. So, thank you," he scratches the tip of his ears and you shrug nonchalantly. "It's the truth. You might get on my ass but that doesn't change the fact you are a pretty man."

He doesn’t respond and you tug at the sleeve of his shirt playfully, "You won't tell me I’m pretty too?"

"But then I’d be lying."

"Asshole."

"Pretty," he replies without missing a beat.

You laugh loudly, hand tightly clutching your stomach and he joins you. There is a newfound lightness in your steps now. Unbeknownst to him, Minho just managed to lift a small weight off your shoulders, allowing you a brief moment of respite.

"This is me," you say when you arrive in front of your apartment block, "Thank you for walking me home."

"Of course. Don't dream of me."

"Idiot," you laugh waving him off and he does the same. "Oh, and text me when you get home safely!" you shout before heading inside.

For the second time this night, Minho is blushing profusely at your words. He sighs to himself, waiting patiently until a light turns on in your place to leave.

✹✹✹

It’s been two months since the start of the new term. You still went to Limbo, every Saturday with Minho- even when you didn’t need to study. 

Sometimes you’d just grab a book and you’d both read, a cat lazily lounging at your feet. You started sitting at the same table too; you figured it was easier since one of you always pays for the other. When you have a bet, but also randomly, when you notice that the other person is feeling down and you want to cheer them up without saying anything.

That's why you bought three bubble teas for Minho in a row. He was quieter these days, you noticed. He didn’t talk to you nor did he retort back in class. It was the first time you’ve seen him this way. As if he was a simple shell of the person he usually is. 

You were walking out of your Communications Strategies class, which Minho weirdly didn’t come to when you realized that it was pouring rain. You smile lightly to yourself, grateful since you thought about picking up an umbrella this morning. 

As you walk through campus, everyone around you running to take shelter, you spot someone sitting on a bench, completely drenched from the rain. Their head is hung low and you frown to yourself. They would surely get a cold if they stay there.

But then the person raises their head and you quickly realize it's Minho. You jog up to him instinctively, standing in front of him and shielding him from the rain with your umbrella.

He looks up at you and you feel your heart clench. His eyes are void of emotion and he stares blankly at you. "Are you okay?" you ask and he blinks at your words, as if his brain hadn't yet registered that you were there.

"Yeah."

"You don't look like it", you tilt your head to the side and he looks down again. You have to strain to hear his next words, muffled by the rain and his mumbling, "I don't want to talk, yn."

You decide to put away your umbrella and sit down next to him on the bench. The rain falls rapidly on both of you, and you feel yourself grow cold from it. 

"What are you doing?" He questions, turning to the side to look at you.

"Enjoying the rain. It is kind of stupid that we have umbrellas, right?"

"You'll catch a cold."

"I mean we always complain about the drought and then when it rains, we hide from it. But it's really beautiful."          

"Stop, I don't want you to get sick."

"Well, neither do I. Let's go eat some soup. My treat."

"Yn, I don’t-"

"I thought you were smart enough to know I won't take no for an answer."

"But I-" you cut him off again. "Also, I’m doing this for me because when you order for two, they give you a lot of side dishes. Now come on."

You stand up and he looks doubtfully at you, before following suit. You open up the umbrella again and hold it over both of your heads. He has to huddle close to you, and your shoulders brush against each other. Once, twice. Not that you're keeping count. But your body is always hyper-aware of Minho’s proximity. You also notice how he silently moves from your right to your left, this way he's the one walking right next to the speeding cars. Your hold on the umbrella tightens. You were still not used to those small attentions of his. 

You arrive in front of your apartment block and he hesitates. "Come up, I won't murder you I promise." You joke and he smiles lightly back at your words. Progress.

He enters your dorm and you can see him eying his surroundings. You know that if it was another time, he would have teased you about something- anything. But he stays quiet, and you find yourself missing the sound of his voice.

"Would you like to shower?" You offer and he nods, "Please."

You lead him to your bathroom and show him where the washing machine is. "Put your clothes in there for a quick wash and dry. You can shower meanwhile."

He nods again as you hand him a towel. "I'll be outside."

You quickly leave the bathroom to place the soup orders, and Minho discards his wet clothes, walking into your shower. The water is piping hot, and he leans his forehead on the cold tiles. He doesn’t move for the first ten minutes, too tired at the prospect of lifting his limbs.

Nothing particular happened. But he’d go through days when he’d quiet down because everything around him was too much. The feel of his clothes against his skin, and the sun streaming through his curtains. But it always passes. Minho was a realistic man and he knew that his emotions would regulate themselves. That’s why he didn’t like appearing vulnerable in front of other people.

But for some reason, he didn’t mind lowering his guard with you. He knew you wouldn’t judge.

He sighs, grabbing your cherry-scented shampoo and pouring it into his hands. He can clearly smell you now. The scent of your hair that always tickles his nose, whenever you are sitting close to him. Your body wash is next and he wonders if this is how your skin smells, like vanilla and jasmine, and something entirely you. 

Forty minutes later, Minho finally steps out of the shower. His clothes are clean and he quickly puts them on. He dries his hair with the towel as he walks out of your bathroom towards the living room. 

He finds you sitting on the ground, in front of a heater that looks close to giving up. He makes a mental note of giving you the one he has since he doesn't really use it. You changed out of your clothes too, and you are now wearing a pair of pajamas with little bunnies sewn into it. The sight almost manages to make him smile. 

"Still cold?" you question when you notice him standing behind you, unmoving, and he shakes his head no.

"Good, the soup is here." You say cheerfully, pointing at the steaming bowls sitting on your table. Minho hums in reply and you stand up, grabbing the towel from his hands to place it on the drying rack.

You come back, a soft green blanket in your hands. You sit on the couch and pat the spot beside you. Minho sits next to you, and you lay the blanket on both of your laps, before handing him his soup.

You start the show you’ve been last watching, as you both eat in silence, your legs crisscrossed. You make some comments throughout the episodes. You figured that it was a safe territory, to talk about something as mundane as this. He didn't reply but you didn't mind. You weren't here to have a conversation with him. You just wanted to distract him.

You realize at that moment that Minho always looked so put together to you. But he had problems of his own too. That much was obvious. It made you feel closer to him, in a sense. You were both just trying to make it through the day.

Two hours later, you get up to grab a book, handing Minho the remote to put on a show of his own. You curl in a ball in the corner, reading where you left off last night.

"Can you... Can you read out loud?" Minho speaks for the first time in a while and you look at him. His eyes are closed, his head resting against your couch.

"Sure."

You start to read, and Minho further sinks into the couch. He feels at home here. Because the blanket is soft and the light is dim enough to not hurt his eyes. Or it could be that he smells like you, a scent so comforting he wants to bury himself in it. Or maybe it's your voice that floats through the air, slowly clouding Minho’s every sense. He feels as if he could see the words you were pronouncing dancing in front of his eyes. You enunciated each syllable clearly, making sure that no sound was forgotten.

As Minho gently drifted to sleep, he felt as if he was part of the words you read out loud. He felt as if you were treating him with the same care, making sure that he knew he wasn't invisible. At least not to you.

When you wake up the next morning, Minho is gone. And his place beside you on the couch is empty. He made you breakfast, scrambled eggs, and freshly pressed orange juice. And right next to it you find a note, "Thank you for reading to me."

✹✹✹

Minho didn't believe in having a lot of friends. He was content with the two people he had, Chan and Changbin. The latter was his high school friend, he skipped a year and ended up being in the same class as Minho. They didn't talk at first until the day Changbin dropped a book on Minho's foot. The brooding man started apologizing profusely, and that was the start of their friendship. They've kept in touch since.

Chan was his roommate at university. It's not that he particularly wanted to befriend him, but Chan was a social butterfly and he quickly managed to pull Minho into his friendly trap. He annoys Minho the most, but in an endearing way. And although Chan is older, Minho still strangely developed a soft spot for him. 

And he supposes he has you too now. At first, you weren’t friends, rivals at most. He enjoyed reeling you up and having you frown at his words in your heated debates. He also liked talking to you, because your ideas were interesting and you always gave him a new fresh perceptive to see things.

That’s how he strictly saw you as, an intelligent human who he liked to debate with.

But then he started to look forward to meeting up with you at Limbo. He no longer minded the fact that you took his self-assigned table, from his high school days. And he laughed more freely with you, enjoying how you always had a witty retort sitting at the tip of your tongue. 

That’s how he started to notice things that friends most definitely notice. How you have a charm bracelet you always fidget with whenever you are nervous. How you stray away from physical touch. How you scratch your eyebrow when you are deep in thought.

But also, how you seem to have an obsession with cherries. Your cherry pendant, your cherry-scented shampoo, and your cherry-tainted lips. A friend would most certainly think that your lips are like red wine-stained glass.

He remembers one of the many times when you were at Limbo, and he saw you reapply your lip tint, or so you called it. You caught him looking and he swiftly averted his gaze, but it wasn't quick enough. Suddenly you were in front of him, a tiny red bottle in hand.

"Let me apply it to you," you smiled and he pushed your head away with his pointer finger. "No."

"Please," you pouted and he couldn't help but find you adorable. You sometimes reminded him of a small kitten. But he didn’t dare to call you by that nickname. 

"Never."

"If I score more than you in our environmental assignment then I will do it."

"Fine." he huffed so that you'd leave him alone.

Minho didn't study for that assignment. He blamed it on a headache, not that it's ever stopped him before. And two weeks later you were in front of him, eyebrows scrunched in concentration. You applied the lip tint gently on his plump lips, carefully tracing over his cupid bow. 

Your face was mere inches away from his and he noticed how you were wearing a gloss today, for change. It was shimmering under the lights and he usually didn't like glittery things, but he couldn't take his eyes off your lips. 

"All done!" you clapped excitedly, snapping him out of his haze. You then shove your phone camera into his face so he'd look at the results.

"You should be a model. Your face is perfectly sculpted," you comment nonchalantly, before sitting back in your seat. 

“I know.” He replies confidently, but his hand kept fiddling with the tip of his now pink ears. He couldn't concentrate for the rest of the night.

You were his friend because he always worried if you were eating enough. That’s why he urged you to grab a bite in the convenience store near Limbo, whenever you finished up your studying late.

This was one of the many times you sat on the minuscule table outside, hot ramen bowls in front of the both of you. Minho huffed in annoyance between each bite, his bangs were getting longer, disturbing him when he leaned down to slurp his noodles. 

“Here,” you stand up from your place, a hair tie in your hands. 

“What are you doing?” He questions as you stand behind him. You don’t reply, silently grabbing his hair and putting it up in a tiny ponytail, this way it wouldn’t get in his eyes anymore.

“Voila,” you sit back down, resuming your eating. Minho was grateful for the dimly lit street because his entire face was burning up. Your fingers in his hair were gentle and he wondered how it would feel if you ran your fingers through it. 

This was something friends think about, right? 

"I’ll cut my hair tomorrow," he clears his throat. He didn't know why he told you. You certainly weren't interested in his hair endeavors.

"What?!" you yell, "Don't. Your hair is beautiful why would you cut it?"

"Because it's getting longer."

"But it suits you."

Minho also noticed how you always threw compliments his way. Not in a flirtatious way, but in a genuine one. He couldn't help but wonder what made you this way. Did you so freely give love to others because you knew how it felt to not receive it?

"I’ll still cut it."

Minho returned home; his hair still clipped back in a ponytail. Chan eyed him weirdly but he shut him off with a glare. The elastic remained at his bedside since.

He didn't cut his hair.

The moment Minho started to consider you a close friend, was when you invited him over to watch your show. You didn’t force him to open up that night, and he appreciated it, more than he let on.

That's how a week later, he finds himself walking towards your dorm again. The thoughts in his head got too much, and Chan was immersed in his makeshift studio, which meant he won't be free for the next four hours, minimum.

He didn't plan on going to you. It was late at night and you were probably asleep, but his feet naturally led him to the direction of your place.

He knocks softly on your door. He wasn't even sure if he wanted you to open. What would you think of him showing up at eleven pm? He should have thought this thro-

"Minho?" you call out, and he startles a bit, his feet already inching away from the door.

"This was a bad idea, I'm sorry," he starts to retract back but you grab the hem of his jacket to stop him. "Do you... Do you want to watch my show with me?" you ask, a soft smile on your face and he nods tentatively.

"Okay, come in," you open the door wider and Minho follows you inside. The look in his eyes reminds you of the day you found him sitting under the rain. You didn't like it, you wanted him to find his spark back, his usual demeanor. He wasn't deserving of anything but happiness.

"I’ve started a new show, this one's a bit more romantic, so don't go around imagining me as the main character," you tease and he scoffs at your words, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

He doesn't reply, but you don't mind. There was this secret agreement between the two of you, you would talk and he would listen. He needed the distraction, and you needed the company. Sometimes the line between alone and lonely blurs, and on days like these, Minho’s presence fills the void inside.

You comment on the scenes and Minho hums in reply, you watch three episodes in a row, and your eyes are getting drowsy, so you close them.

"Minho," you call out gently and he turns his head towards you.

"Yeah?"

"What color are you feeling tonight?" You ask, referencing to what he told you on your dinner celebration. That felt like an eternity ago.

"Black." You stay silent and Minho fidgets with his hands before speaking once again. "I feel a lot at the same time, too much of every color. That's why- that's why I said black."

"How can I help you feel yellow?"

"You already do." His admission came softly and it made your breath hitch in your throat. You wanted to open your eyes and look at him, but you figured it will only make him close off even more.

“Okay. Will you stay for breakfast?”, you whisper. You were very sleepy, the soft chatter of the TV and your hushed conversation were like a lullaby to you. 

"You want me to?" he asks, and he sounds so vulnerable you can't find it in you to say anything but the truth.

"I do," you admit, and that's the last thing you remember before sleeping.

Your head falls near Minho’s lap on the couch, your hair tickling his exposed thigh. Minho shouldn’t feel this way, he thinks. He’s sitting on the leather couch and his feet are touching the cold floor and yet all he can feel is three strands of your hair tickling him.

He glances at you, at your now parted lips and your relaxed eyebrows. His hand hovers over your hair, but then he curls it into a tight fist. What is he doing? He thinks to himself as he drags an angry hand through his face. He sighs, before standing up and grabbing the blanket you had on the opposing chair. He gently lays it on your body before sitting next to you once again. 

You told him to stay for breakfast. He’ll stay.

✹✹✹

2 months later

"Yn!" Minho shouts in your ear as he plops down next to you. You startle, dropping the book you were reading. 

"I hate you," you grumble, picking up your book and he smiles cheekily at you, "No you don't."

You were laying on the grass of your campus garden, in between two classes, trying to kill the time. It was April so the weather was perfect for lying under the warm sunrays. You loved spring, it always held within it the promise of a better time. 

"What are you doing?"

"I was reading before you got here and started to annoy me." 

"Don't mind me. Do your thing." 

"And what are you doing?"

"Enjoying the sun."

"You couldn't find any other place to do so?"

"Nope."

"You're annoying" You try to sound mad but the smile on your face betrays you. You started looking forward to any moment Minho randomly shows up throughout your day. Sometimes it's late at night when he's suddenly craving sushi and he drags you with him because if he's not studying then you shouldn't be too. 

Sometimes it's during the day, when he takes you to a new garden where he found the quote "cutest cats in existence". Not as cute as his cats, of course. 

Sometimes it's late afternoon when he just knocks on your door, and he's there with Chan-his roommate who sometimes joins your study sessions- snacks in their hands. You've learned that what Minho doesn't say in words, he compensates by spending time with you. And you didn't tell him but waiting for these moments has been the joy of your life for the past few weeks.

It made you feel excited- like a child waiting up for Christmas morning to discover what gifts they are receiving. 

So, you resume reading, as Minho is lying next to you. You could smell his pinewood cologne and you wished you could pour his essence into a bottle and carry it with you everywhere. 

You notice how the sun is hitting Minho’s eyes directly, and how his eyebrows are scrunched up at the aggression. So, you grab your book with your left hand, and hover your right one over his eyes, shielding him from the sun. Minho's breath tickles your hand and you can feel goosebumps rising through your skin. 

It's as if every physical proximity with Minho made you feel hyperaware of every part of your body, and how he can lighten it with a simple breath from his part. It made you wonder what it would feel to have his hands on your skin.

As if Minho heard your thoughts, he gently wraps his thumb and index finger around your wrist, steadying your hand in place so it wouldn't strain your arm. You suddenly don't know what page you are in, too overwhelmed by the feeling of his hands on you. 

His touch is very featherlight and you are afraid to move, to break the bubble you are suddenly pulled into. 

"Read to me," he tells you and you gulp. You never understood why Minho enjoyed it when you read to him. 

"Like my voice that much?" you tease, in an attempt to hide how affected you are. You were so close to him; it would be easy to slide down and lay your head on his chest. You wondered how his heartbeat would sound. Was it steady, or racing just like your own? 

"Yeah, it's calming," he replies sincerely, catching you off guard. You didn't expect him to compliment you, and now you are racking your brain for a retort, anything to make you breathe again. 

"Growing soft on me Minho?" you say, the same question you asked on your first dinner out. The first time you truly saw him, the first time you felt as if you were two pieces of the same puzzle, just waiting for someone to connect the both of you. 

He doesn't reply. And you sit there, patiently waiting. His first answer came so easily, so naturally, because he was being sarcastic, "I’m basically in love with you", he told you back then. So why can't he say it again?

"Yes, I am." He finally replies and you feel your breath catch in your throat. You try to account it for your brain misguiding you. It wasn't Minho speaking, it was the rustling of the leaves and the singing of the birds that you just heard. But it was him, and now his eyes are open and he's looking at you. Your hand is still shielding his eyes and his fingers are still wrapped around your wrist. And you are suddenly feeling. You are feeling too much. You don't know what to do with those feelings cursing through your veins and you can't face them. Because they are scaring you.

"I'll just... Yeah, I’ll just read," you say quietly, too flustered by his intense gaze. You were already on the other side, you realize. His eyes pulled you in and you were stuck in there, swimming in a pool of honey. 

"Out loud," he says and you chuckle, "Fine, Min." The nickname slips out of your tongue naturally and you quickly snap your head towards Minho to see if he noticed. 

His eyes are closed, and there is a slight smile on his face, and you can swear that he just repeated the nickname to himself softly. 

✹✹✹

You've been so sick these past days, you barely managed to go to class. Your head throbbed with pain and your entire body felt as if someone thoroughly boxed it. 

You were grateful that Minho reeled down his teasing because you had no energy to retort back. He may have noticed how sick you felt and truthfully it would be hard not to. You stayed silent throughout the day, and you looked so pale, you avoided looking at the mirror altogether.

Though Minho didn't talk to you, he still silently placed water bottles and some of your favorite snacks on your desk. You'd down the water, grateful for the relief it brought your sore throat. And when you didn't touch the food, he'd immediately text you 'Eat up', followed by a simple 'Please'. Having someone else care for your well-being felt weird, but it warmed your heart beyond what words could describe. 

You only came today to pass your Criminal Law mid-term, but your head hurt so badly that you weren't even sure what you wrote on your paper. The words blurred in front of your eyes and you almost slept in the middle of your exam, exhaustion threatening to take over your body. 

You fucked up, badly. You haven't screwed up this much in years.

You thought that you were slowly getting better since Minho surpassing you no longer sparked an unworthy feeling within you. But apparently, you were wrong to believe so. Self-doubt crept up within you once again, and the ugly feelings it stirred slowly clawed at your throat, making it hard for you to breathe.

It was one test, and yet it reeled you back ages ago. 

Tears threaten to spill out of your eyes as you hurriedly walk out of your class. You make a beeline for the library, figuring that it will be mostly empty by now. 

You pull out a chair and sit on it, lowering your head down so no one will see you. Your tears are falling rapidly and you hit your thigh repeatedly.  You hated how weak you felt in that instant. 

"Yn?", someone calls out and you curse internally. You don't have to look up to see who it is, Minho's voice has become a part of you- you could easily recognize it between a thousand mingling sounds. 

You don't want him to see you, especially not like this, weak and vulnerable and on the verge of breaking down. So you quickly slip a pair of sunglasses on your eyes, before raising your head to look at him. "Hm?"

"Are you okay?" he asks, his tone so soft it makes you want to cry ten times fold. You hated it, hated how attentive he was to you. You didn't deserve it. 

"Yeah, yeah. I'm just here to pick a book," you lie, abruptly standing up and heading toward the rows behind you. You desperately needed to get away from him. 

You pause in front of a random shelf and then you feel Minho standing behind you. You grab a random book and he peeks above your shoulder to see it, "Economics? You hate this subject."

"Why are you following me?" you turn around attempting your best to sound mad. When in reality, your heart was brimming with hurt. You wished you could get away from your body and seep into someone's soul to feel what it's like to love yourself.

"You aren't okay," he asserts and you hate it. You hate that he sounds so sure of himself. Was it that noticeable? Were you not fooling anyone?

"I am," your voice is shaking but you are adamant about contradicting him. You couldn't let him see you. What if he runs?

"Then..." he steps forward and you take a step back until your back is against the shelf. His left arm cages your body, but his right one stays by his side. He is leaving you an opening, you realize, an outing in case you feel uncomfortable. Against all odds, you don't.

 "Why are you hiding from me?" he asks, gently taking your sunglasses off your face, and placing them on the top of your head.

You don't look up at him, and he hooks his finger underneath your chin, gently raising your head. When your tear-stained eyes meet his, he frowns deeply, "Why are you crying?"

"it's nothing."

"Yn..."

"I fucked up, okay?! That was the worst test I’ve ever given in years." The tears start to flow at your words and you wipe them away aggressively. You despised crying in front of people. 

Minho raises his hand to wipe the tears away for you but he quickly retracts it- you probably wouldn't want him to touch your face. It was enough that he had grabbed your wrist a couple of weeks before this. He quickly racks his brain for something to do, because the sight of your tears is making his heart ache in a way he hasn't felt before. It's as if he's feeling your emotions deep within him.

In desperation, Minho pinches your arm and you yelp, startled. "What was that for?" you whisper-shout and he raises his hands in defense, "I didn't know what else to do."

"So, you thought about pinching me?" you chuckle in bewilderment and he scratches the top of his hair sheepishly. 

"I mean, it worked. Look, you stopped crying," he points out raising his brows at you proudly and you shake your head at him.

"Remind me to never cry in front of you again." 

Minho grins at you before his face turns serious once again. "Look, you are the smartest person I know," he pauses, adding with a cheeky smirk, "After me of course." Which makes you giggle against your will. 

"Shut up", you lightly punch his chest and he smiles. "One test doesn't define you. You always work very hard. I wouldn't lie to you."

"Mm," you hum and he frowns at your lack of enthusiasm, but still, he doesn't comment. 

"No more crying," he wiggles his finger in front of your face and you roll your eyes, wiping the rest of your tears away. "Fine. Pretend as if this never happened."

"What are you talking about?" he asks as if confused, and you can't help the smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. It's as if Minho knows exactly what to say to cheer you up. 

"Come with me," he tells you, gently pulling you by the sleeve of your hoodie. 

"Where to?"

"I’m craving ice cream."

"And why do you need me?"

"You're craving ice cream too," he says in a matter-of-a-fact tone. 

"Only if you're paying," you add with a giggle and he whines loudly, "I feel so so used around you." 

True to his words, Minho takes you to the nearest ice cream parlor. It's a 20 minutes walk away and you are grateful for the distance because it helps you clear your head a bit.

Minho lets you pick whatever flavors you want, and when you hesitate between two of them, he tells the cashier to put them both into your cup. This is how you end up with a container of 5 scoops of ice cream. You insisted you'd share, and Minho begrudgingly agreed when you threatened to walk out and leave him.

You then walk to a deserted alley and sit on the sidewalk. You didn't want to be around people right now, and thankfully, Minho understood without you having to say a word.  

You munch silently on your ice cream and Minho does the same, the both of you lost in your thoughts. You naturally take turns holding the freezing container, so it wouldn't numb the fingers of one of you.

When you're done, Minho stands up to throw it away in a nearby trashcan before sitting back again next to you. 

Suddenly you feel him gently tapping your hand. You look down to find that you've curled your fingers into a tight fist, so much that there are crescent indents visible on your palm now. 

"Let's play thumb war," he tells you and you giggle at his words. You never knew what to expect from him. 

Still, as your fingers hold each other, and your thumb circles one another, you feel yourself calm down slightly. You play a couple of rounds, and you know he's going easy on you, allowing you to quickly trap his thumb down. 

No one has gone to such lengths to cheer you up, and you suddenly feel so grateful for Minho’s presence in your life. You didn't care in what shape he was in, you just needed him to be in it. Which in turn makes you think how bad it'd hurt if he ever leaves. 

You don't want Minho to leave. You've gotten so attached to him that the thought of not talking to him again makes your heart race in panic. 

Minho notices the change in your expression, suddenly melancholic once again. Your hand has gone limp in his, the thumb war long forgotten by you. 

He curses under his breath, before looking at you. "If I dance for you, will you quit being so sad?"

"Dance for me?" you repeat incredulously and he nods, "Yes. I’ll show you an upcoming choreography just... Please smile?" 

"Okay," you giggle, plastering a wide grin on your face. 

"Not like that you look scary."

"Get to dancing!" you clap excitedly and he rolls his eyes, standing up and looking through his phone for a particular music. 

"Oh and no comment!" he looks pointedly at you, and you nod, pretending to zip your mouth and throwing away the key. 

'Finesse' by Bruno Mars starts playing and you are left mesmerized by the way Minho dances. It's short but it leaves you yearning to see more. His body moves smoothly, hitting each beat effortlessly. He made it look as if dancing was second nature to him, that it came as easily to him as breathing. 

You were speechless, rightfully so. You wished you could build a world where all Minho did was dance. 

"That was-" you start when he stops the music but he cuts you off instantly, "I said no comment."

"But--" Minho places his finger on your mouth to silence you, seemingly not thinking too much of it. But the feel of his finger on your lips makes you dizzy. Minho quickly takes off his hand, a blush evidently creeping up his neck. 

"Let's just go home," he sighs in defeat and you laugh despite the intense feelings cursing through you.

You don't know if you are imagining it but you swear that your pinkies brush against each other on your walk back. As if there was this magnetic force pulling them together. You wondered what would happen if you just linked your pinky with his. Would he grab you by the hand or will he let go of you entirely?

You were too much of a coward to find out. You were scared of messing up anything with him. So, you'd settle for this. Stolen glances and random outings. You just need him in your life. 

"Thank you for today," you tell Minho once you arrive and he shrugs, as what he did wasn't a big deal.

"No, I mean it. Thank you," you repeat, trying your best to convey how sincere you were being. You take in a deep breath, before grabbing his hand and squeezing it, for a fleeting second, before dropping it again. 

Minho is sure that your hand will now be imprinted into his, that the lines tracing over your palm will merge with his as one. Your touch was barely there but it had electrocuted him. He wondered to himself if his body would be able to handle more from you. But he'd gladly burn in your fires for the sake of holding you. And he'd wait, unwaveringly, as time stretches alongside the two of you. He'd wait as long as it takes for you. 

"Yn, I..." he stammers, taking a step closer to you. His scent engulfs you and you shamefully close your eyes, inhaling it. When you open them again, you find Minho glancing down at your lips. You gulp, dazzled by his proximity. 

"You have a mole on your nose," you suddenly speak up and his eyes snap back to yours, an adorable confusion drawn on his features. 

"I like that mole," you continue and you wish you could dig yourself a hole and bury yourself in it. 

"Thank you," he chuckles and you nod vigorously, "You're welcome." 

"Can I ask you something?" he says and your breath hitches in your throat. "Sure."

"You don't like it when people touch you, right?" 

"Yeah."

"Can I ask why?" 

You want to confide in him, to tell him that it’s because you long for it, you crave it so badly. That this need has woven itself into the very fabric of your being. An ache so raw that it scares you at times. You’ve never known what it feels like to be held- it was uncharted territory to you. 

"Isn't everyone scared of the unknown?" you settle on saying, and he nods in understanding. Of course, he understood. No one knows you as well as him. 

"It's okay. I just wanted to know if I ever overstepped my boundaries."

"You didn't," you reply instantly. 

"Good. You'll tell me if I ever do, right?"

"I will." 

"Okay." 

"Um. I'll get going," you point behind you and Minho smiles at you, waving you off.

You walk for a few steps before coming back again quickly. You then grab Minho’s hand, gently squeezing it like before, "You are an amazing dancer." 

And then you drop it, running back towards your apartment block without waiting for a reply. 

Minho stays frozen in his place. You think he's an amazing dancer. And you held his hand for five seconds. 

That's four seconds more than the first time. 

Progress.        

✹✹✹

You haven't gotten out of your house for the past three days. 

Everything crashed around you rapidly, it made you realize that the ground you once stood on was only an illusion, elusive and fleeting. 

You were doing well; you were getting better. But then Monday came and you went out for a walk in the park near you. As you sat there, you saw a little girl playing on the swings, delightful joy dancing across her features. But then she fell to the ground and you instinctively stood up to help her, only to notice her mother running to her. 

The world stilled around you as you clearly saw it- how the little girl clung to her mother's embrace, her embodiment of hope and love. You never had that. You don’t even know what perfume your mother used because she never allowed you to get that close to her. 

You stood up abruptly, quickly heading back to your apartment block. As you ran up the stairs, you ended up bumping into one of your neighbors. You were quick to apologize but they ignored you, and the feeling of being invisible came back to haunt you ten times fold. 

You knew you shouldn’t have done it, you knew you should have deleted your mother’s number when she sent you away to university without a backward glance, relieved at the thought of you getting a full-ride scholarship and not needing her anymore. But you didn’t, you kept her number in the hopes that she’d call. On your birthday, on holidays, on a random Thursday to tell you that she did remember who you are. 

With trembling hands, tears welling in your eyes, you dialed your mother’s number for the first time in a year. You didn’t know what you were expecting. Maybe she regrets it. Maybe she misses you. Maybe she didn’t find the courage to mend her wrongdoings and that's why she never called. 

"Hello?" her voice rang through your apartment. Goosebumps erupted on your arms and your hold on the phone tightened. Her voice took you back to memories you thought you had buried. How you spent countless nights yearning to hear the sound of her voice, how you regretted it once she spoke to attack you.

You hate her. You miss her. You want to hang up. You need to ask if she's doing okay. 

“Who is this?” Her voice was devoid of recognition, freezing you in your tracks. You felt as if a bucket of ice was thrown over your head, dousing the flame of hope that flickered in your heart. 

She deleted your number.

You quickly hung up, placing your phone down on the table. The tears refused to fall. It was as if your body had long anticipated this outcome, leaving only your wounded soul to bear the pain. 

Healing isn't linear, you've read about it in books and heard it in shows and movies. One step back doesn't mean that your entire progress is gone. You know this, you've memorized those sentences. So why do you not believe them? Why does it feel as if you can never be free from the past? Why does it feel as if you’ll always seek something out of her? 

Those questions roamed your mind for the past three days, making you too tired at the prospect of lifting your limbs, let alone leaving your apartment. You sent your two friends a text, telling them that you're sick so they wouldn't worry. Not that you believed they would. Nothing made sense to you anymore.

You laid on your bed in utter silence- a tense quiet that was disrupted on the third day by someone knocking on your door. You didn't know who was there; you just hoped that they'd leave you alone.

To your surprise, you open the door to find Minho, some notes in his right hand and a coffee in his left. He sends an easy smile your way. You don't smile back.

"What do you want?" your voice is cold, but Minho doesn't bristle. A cheeky smile settles on his lips as he leans on your doorway.

"You didn't come to class for the past three days, so I brought you the notes. So, you wouldn't think our competition is unfair."

"Competition," you chuckle coldly, heading inside your apartment, and he follows suit. You start to pace around furiously, and Minho looks at you worriedly. "Competition?" you repeat, the word dripping off your tongue like venom. You turn around, marching towards Minho and standing a few inches from him. "You know what? Fuck you and your competition!"

"Yn-"

"Did it ever occur to you that I never wanted a part in this competition? That all I wanted was to be left alone?" you say, growing louder as you jab your finger into his chest repeatedly. "I never wanted any of this! Do you understand? I never wanted to be this way," you shout angrily in his face.

The worried look in Minho’s eyes snaps you out of your haze. You realize that you are being utterly ridiculous lashing out at Minho, when the one person you are mad at is yourself. 

Your anger quickly deflates, leaving in its trail an agonizing sadness. It's so sudden that it knocks the breath out of you, and you clutch your chest as if it could soothe the burn in your heart. Suddenly you are twelve years old again, crying in your room because you feel like no one has ever loved you.

But this time you aren't alone. Minho is in front of you, and his eyebrows are so furrowed you want to lean forward to ease the tension between them. His eyebrows, you liked his eyebrows, they were arched, and they framed his eyes nicely, and his eyes are brown and so big, and they always look at you softly and why is it getting so hard to breathe-

"Did I do something to you? Whatever it is I’m sorry," Minho panics, cutting off your frantic train of thought. But now, the weight of guilt adds to your overwhelming emotions. You shouldn't have lashed out at him, he brought you coffee and you yelled at him. Maybe your mom was right after all.

You shake your head left and right furiously, your words coming out in hiccups. Since when did you start crying? "It isn't- it isn't you."

"Then let me help you-", he steps forward, hand outstretched, but you take three hurried steps back and wrap your hands around yourself protectively. "Don’t. Please, don't."

"Why are you pushing me away?" his tone isn't accusatory. You've learned time and time again that Minho wouldn't do anything that made you feel uncomfortable.

"You won't understand."

"Then make me."

"Because I’m afraid!" the words slip out of your mouth before you can stop them. "I’m afraid if you ever hug me, I wouldn't be able to go back to hugging myself. I'd need you and I can't afford to need someone else."

You regret the words as soon as they fleet away from your mouth. He would look at you differently, he would find you pathetic and then he’d leave. And you wanted him to leave. But you also wanted him to stay. It was all so confusing. 

You felt as if your being was torn between two great forces, each one of them trying to win the war raging inside you. You wished someone else would make the decisions in your place, for once.

Minho places the coffee and notes on the ground before approaching you, his palms facing up in a gesture of surrender. "I won't leave you," he says softly. "I’ll be by your side for as long as you'll have me."

"Minho..." your voice catches in your throat as you utter his name- like a broken prayer. He stands before you, his eyes shimmering like the reflection of a river on a sunny day.

"Please, let me make it better." 

You nod tentatively and Minho comes even closer to you. He was treating you like one would with a wounded animal, giving you a chance to ultimately back out. But for once, you listen to what your heart has been yearning for. Your bones are aching to be held, to feel the warmth of a body against your own, to feel safe and secure. 

Minho embraces you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and bringing you to him. You slowly bring your arms up and lace them around his waist. You are afraid, deathly afraid. His grip is loose, and you almost can't feel him around you, but when you lay your head on his chest, he tightens his hold on you and you instinctively let out a sob. 

He's hugging adult you, the woman whose heart was once again broken by her mom. But he's also hugging little you, the girl who was craving affection from everyone around her. In that instant, Minho is hugging every single version of you that ever needed a hug. 

You were right to be scared because you don't want to let go, you want to stay in his arms because they feel safe, like a shield protecting you. You can't go back to not hugging Minho. 

The sensation is overwhelming and your knees buckle underneath you. But instead of holding you up, Minho falls to the ground with you, as if you are two inseparable pieces of one puzzle. He isn’t here to fix you, he’s here to break down with you and help you pick up the scattered pieces.

You think back to that night in the park when Minho told you about Japanese vases. At this moment, it dawns on you that Minho has found a way to become a part of you. He was the molten gold binding your broken parts together. He was the invisible thread stitching your wounds back together.

Who were you fooling? It was him; it was him all along. 

Minho rocks you gently as you cry and cry and cry. His hand finds your hair and he plays with it as you sob. He tells you you'll be okay, you'll feel better and you try to believe him, his words wrap around your bruises like a healing balm. 

"There, there, love. You are okay", he murmurs, tenderly patting your head. A fresh set of tears wells up in your eyes. Love.

"I’m sorry. I'm so sorry," you apologize as you pull away from his embrace. 

"Why are you apologizing? Is it because you wet my shirt? I don't mind," he reassures you with a smile and you shake your head. 

 "I was mean to you and you didn’t deserve it," you explain through hiccups.

"It's okay, you weren't mad at me, were you?" he asks, wiping your tears away so gently with his thumbs, careful not to irritate the sensitive skin.

"No. Still, it isn't okay and I’m sorry. I'm so sorry." 

"Shh, don't apologize. It's okay." you look at him doubtfully and he rolls his eyes playfully, "Here I’ll even do your silly pinky promise, okay?" he laces his pinky with yours, but then he suddenly leans forward and places a chaste kiss on your thumb pad. "There, sealed forever."

You giggle faintly as a blush dusts your cheeks, "That's not how it works."

"I know."

Your giggle was far different from the ones Minho was accustomed to. It was small, and it didn't brighten up your face like usual. But he was grateful for it nonetheless. He realized how much he missed your laugh, and how all the other sounds in the world pale in comparison to it.

In that moment Minho thinks to himself that he'd do anything to make you smile again. He'd make a fool out of himself if it meant making you happy. He'd settle for a simple tug at the corners of your mouth, anything but the sadness that seemed etched in your face, as if it was blended into the colors that drew you.

You tentatively move around, before laying your head on his lap. Minho's hand instinctively finds your hair and he starts to gently play with it. It feels as if you've done this a million times before, when in fact it was the first. 

There was something wildly intimate about laying on the floor with the man who just comforted you. It made you want to spill all your secrets to him, one by one, and have him hug you through them.

"Did you mean it? When you said you'll stay?" you felt so vulnerable in his hold, as if he could twist you whoever he liked. But you trusted him. You trusted yourself with Minho.

"I did. Your walls are always up. It's hard to peek behind them. But I don't want to tear them down. I want you to slowly unbuild them. I want you to do it for yourself."

To do it for yourself, it's hard to even know who you are anymore. 

"I want to tell you."

"You don't need to."

"I know, but I want to."

"Okay. Take your time, kitten." he pats your head gently, and you try to sync your breathing to the rhythm of his touch. You were grateful that you were lying on his lap since you couldn't see his face. It made talking feel a little less daunting.

"On my 9th birthday... I was very excited. I'd been on my best behavior that month, trying to please my mom in the hope that, for once, we'd celebrate my birthday. Like a normal little family," you smile sadly, you were so hopeful back then.

"My birthday came, I woke up, excited. My mom was still asleep, nothing out of the ordinary. So, I made my breakfast and walked to my school. I wore my prettiest dress and put on pigtails with hair clips. It was my birthday after all," Minho smiles softly at your words, his hand now resting on your own.

"I got back home and waited for my mom to come back. She remembered my birthday, I thought. And then, she came but she didn't talk to me. So, I thought, oh a surprise party!" you chuckle, but this time the smile on Minho’s face is gone.

"It was then 11 pm, and the hope had slowly died in me. So, in my stupid innocent self, I went to my mom, and asked her "Did you forget my birthday?". And I remember... I remember the way she laughed. Cruelly. Like I had told her the funniest joke in the world. And then. Then she looked me dead in the eye and said 'I hate the fact that you are born. Why would I celebrate that?'"

Minho sucks in a deep breath at your words, and you exhale one right out. It felt comforting, to have someone else stomach the hurt for you. To take the weight off your shoulders, allowing you a few moments to breathe.

"I confronted her about it one day, but she said she doesn't remember saying that. It's funny how it was a random Thursday for her, but for me, it shaped my life." you smile bitterly, "I remember how jealous I was of the way the other kids talked about their mothers. They said the word so lightly. It must have reminded them of sunshine and ice cream and rainbows. But for me, it held an uncharacteristic heaviness to it. I grew to hate the word."

"I drove myself crazy, Min", you whisper and he brings you closer to his body, "was it me or was it her? When did it start? Was it because I was too loud as a child or maybe too quiet? Did I not cater to her fantasies of a kid? I wanted to remember every single thing that happened throughout my childhood, thread through every single memory. I tried to pinpoint the exact moment my mom stopped loving me."

Minho squeezes your hand tightly in his, and you feel as if he was pulling you away from the memory that had long trapped you. You were now watching it unfold from outside of the window, your hand in his, safe from the hurt it had inflicted on you.

"It's not you. It could never be you. Some people are simply not fit to be parents. It's never their kid's fault."

Minho tries his best to keep his touch soothing, to make his voice sound as soft as possible. But he was angry, he was so angry at the world for not taking care of you when you were younger. His heart broke, thinking of 9-year-old you being told such cruel words.

He wanted to turn back time and tell you that you were enough. He wanted to make the pain that seemed so anchored in you float back to the surface, and dissipate like sea foam meeting the shore.

But he couldn't do that. All he could do is comfort present you.

Minho gently pulls you up from his lap, making you sit upright. He crisscrosses his legs and you do the same. Your knees brush against each other and you feel a shiver run down your spine. You didn't know that even knees could emanate such warmth.

"Yn, look at me. The world wouldn't be the same without you in it," he cradles your face between his hands, "You hear me yn? I’m so thankful you exist."

His doe brown eyes are sincere, and it made you want to believe him badly. That's a good start, right?

"I’ll be back," he tells you, letting go of your face and standing up.

You hear Minho rummaging through the kitchen and you take the time to calm yourself down. Sharing those parts of you with Minho felt therapeutic. As if you were healing parts of your inner child. You have never talked about this with anyone before, maybe this is why it still hurt as badly.

Minho comes back five minutes later, his hands behind his back. You raise a brow at him inquisitively and he just smiles secretly at you. "Close your eyes," he tells you and you giggle, doing as he says. He crouches in front of you, and you hear him shuffle in his place for a bit.

Then, "Open your eyes yn," and you find him, in front of you, a cupcake you had stored in your fridge in his hands, and a makeshift candle lit up. "Happy 9th birthday, love. You did well."

You stare at him in utter bewilderment. You couldn't believe your eyes. How could this man be so thoughtful? He was wishing you a belated birthday, to compensate for the 9th birthday you didn't celebrate.

You panic, at the look in his eyes. You've never seen it, never dared to dream of it, of someone caring for you unconditionally. So, you try to scare him, to push him away. You didn't want him to regret knowing you.

"There are things I need you to know um", you chuckle nervously, "When I... When I throw up, I hold my hair, and when I’m sick I nurse myself back to health, and when I have a nightmare I- I hold my hand in the dark. It will be hard for me to hold yours instead."

"We'll start a finger at a time, yeah?"

"It will take time."

"I have time," he speaks easily, as if loving you was effortless and not a strenuous task. You couldn't fathom it.

"You are too busy-", he cuts you off instantly, "Not for you." 

"The world doesn't stop because we need it to." Your voice is quiet; this is your very last try. You are tired of fighting. You are putting down your armor and waving a white flag.

"We'll make it stop. Here, the two of us. On this floor. We'll take as long as we need to."

"I never deemed you as an optimist", you smile a little, a hint of teasing in your tone.

"I’m not," he pauses, gazing down at the cupcake between his hands and then at you. "But I feel that we deserve a bit of happiness together, don't we?"

"We do."

"Then make a wish."

You close your eyes for a few seconds, before blowing on the candle.

"What did you wish for?" he asks a fond smile on his face.

The answer came naturally to you, you didn't even need to think about it. "I wished for you."

Minho's lips come crashing down on yours, and you imagine that this is what it feels like to see colors for the first time. To discover a new world beyond the one you've always known.

The kiss isn't urgent nor feverish, it is one of comfort. Your lips spilling the words you have not yet said to each other. "I love you," he kisses you, "I love you too," you kiss him back. "I need you to stay," you swipe your tongue across his bottom lip, "I’m never leaving you," he opens his mouth allowing you entrance.

As you kiss him, you remember a fact you once learned in high school. The human body possesses seven trillion nerves. And for the first time in your life, you feel as if each of these nerves is alive. You feel that even the smallest atom is electrocuted with Minho’s love and it’s all you know within you.  

You feel as if the pain, the hurt, and the ache you've been through are slowly unraveled, and in their place, a timid happiness is starting to bloom. You imagine that when Minho’s lips met your own, the seven trillion nerves inside you exhaled in relief 'We've made it', they said, 'we'll finally be okay.'

Epilogue

You've always thought that epilogues were useless. How can you resume the rest of your life in one sentence, boil down the rest of your existence in mere pages? Because life doesn't stop at the epilogue, and a new book can start once again, right where you left it off.  

But with Minho, you didn't mind an epilogue. On the contrary, you longed for a soft one. You wanted to rest on this last page, you wanted to lay your worries on the words and tuck them into the syllables. And you wanted to wake up anew.

And this wasn't the end of your story with Minho. A lot happened after it. But it didn't worry you, because epilogues are about the one thing that doesn't change throughout the long march of time. And luckily for you, that constant was Minho’s love for you. From that day he held you, he has never let go.

It took time, for his warmth to seep through your bones. It took time, for your heart to forget the cold. But you wanted to do it. With him. You wanted to love and be loved.

The sound of cats mewling fills your apartment, pudding can always be found in your fridge and you haven't felt invisible in years.

[icantalk710]

📱😪

[ponderingmoonlight]

Sanemi lashing out on his pregnant wife only to beg her for forgiveness later

Pairing: Sanemi x pregnant!reader

Word Count: 3,1k

Synopsis: Like every week, you find yourself on your way back from Shinobu's estate and your pregnancy check-up. Little did you know what horror awaits you at your own home with your husband almost killing two kids...

Warnings: Sanemi is mean in this one and I mean it, extreme hurt but also comfort in the end so don't worry, full Shinazugawa package regarding language and violence lol, not proofread because I have to leave now

Thank you sooo much for that cool request @itsmscoco and I'm sorry it took a while. I really hope you like what I came up with 🤍

You rub your minor belly. For a woman, a pregnancy should feel like a trip to heaven. After all, you are blessed with developing a child that is half you and half your husband. Oh, your beloved and surprisingly gentle husband who always makes sure that you get enough sleep, that you nutrition yourself properly. But even the wind hashira can’t do a single thing against your constant sickness and pain.

“Please try this out, (y/n). Don’t hesitate to come here again if you need something else. You really have an unfortunate pregnancy when it comes to nausea”, Shinobu comments gently while giving your belly a little massage.

“Don’t get me wrong, I am so excited about the honor of caring for a child in my own body. But honestly, I’m so glad when this pregnancy is over”, you huff while taking a deep breath in.

Please, don’t vomit all over the insect pillar who’s just trying to help. You’ve been here what feels like everyday since finding out you’re pregnant. Well, to be exact, Shinobu is the one who suggested that you might expect a child.

Because of your never-ending sickness.

“Oh, there’s nothing to get wrong at all! After all, your pregnancy is a rather difficult one. But I’m sure Shinazugawa is taking good care of you!”

“He definitely does. My husband is an angel”, you reply in an instant.

You can’t wait to go back home. Even though your sleep-drunken eyes won’t be able to stay open longer than maybe a few hours, even though you weren’t able to catch a proper glimpse at Sanemi’s part in the on-going hashira training until now, you can’t wait to go back home. Back into your estate, back into the arms of your beloved husband.

“Not quite the codename I’d use for him, but that’s just what love does, right? I will send a kakushi along with you. Otherwise, Shinazugawa might show up and threaten me”, Shinobu jokes while helping you to get up.

“Thank you for your help. Again.”

You pull the insect hashira into a deep hug. How lucky you should consider yourself for the opportunity to call Shinobu your friend, that Sanemi laid his eyes on you. Out of all the countless women around, the ones with faces like porcelain and bodies so well-formed you can’t hold a candle against every single one of them. But still, he chose you.

“Come on, (y/n). Why are you crying?”, Shinobo whispers into your ear while rubbing small circles onto your back.

“I’m just a little overwhelmed from everything I guess”, you mumble against her comforting shoulder.

Just a few months ago, you would have laughed at anyone who told you that your life would turn out like this. Of course, you’ve lost countless good friends and family members on the way and living with a suborn husband like Sanemi isn’t always easy. But somehow, the two of you always make it work.

Right?

-at the wind hashira estate-

“We are almost there. Are you feeling alright?”

“Oh, don’t worry about me. I’m just a little tired from walking, that’s all!”

Truth is, your feet hurt like hell. Shinobu reported about women who don’t even feel their baby until the second trimester. Why are your feet already swollen, your belly bloated, your guts constantly turning? And there’s still so much ahead.

“Looks like Shinazugawa-sama received a new bunch of trainees after the other corps members all landed in Kocho-sama’s hospital wing”, the kakushi next to you comments dryly.

“Was it really that bad?”

Of course you heard about the rather brutal training methods of your husband. After all, even the walls of his estate aren’t thick enough to stop every single scream from reaching your ears. But still…

“It was pretty bad. Some of the-“

Glass cracking. Screams from afar. Out of instinct, you pick up your pace until you dash towards your home, sweat now dripping from every pore. What happened? Is Sanemi alright? He wouldn’t leash out on one of his students like that. Something must have happened. A demon? No, it’s still daytime. But what is it?

“He’s back! He’s back! That cold-blooded man! Lie down and pretend that you’ve fainted!”, a blonde-haired boy screams while almost collapsing onto the floor.

“What are you talking about? What’s going on here?”, you press out.

Your lungs threaten to fail you, breath already tasting like pure iron.

Until your eyes find Genya.

Your guts twist and turn in every direction, almost force you to vomit all over the place. Genya shouldn’t be here. Out of all people, it shouldn’t be him. And who’s the boy next to him. That familiar scar, you’ve seen that boy before. Is it possible that…

“Kamado Tanjiro”, you breathe out.

Maybe that is even worse.

Your eyes dart around the area without an aim. Where’s Sanemi? Did he find them already? They need to leave before he finds out that they’re here, carry on with another hashira training.

“Please stop now!”, Tanjiro suddenly shouts while stretching out his arm in defence.

An uneasy feeling crawls up your spine, the dark claws of sickening foreshadowing. All you can do is standing death still right where you are and watch in sheer horror as your husband stomps out of your estate motion.

Is that your husband you love and adore, though? You know how untamed he can get especially when getting confronted with his painful past. It was never easy for him to see Genya join the demon slayer corps or realize that his mother could have been saved like Tanjiro’s sister.

But never in your entire life have you seen him like this. The empty shell of your husband, muscles tensed to the maximum and his empty orbs directed towards the two boys in front of him.

In this very moment, you’d trust him to actually kill them.

“What are you going to do? Are you planning to kill Genya?”, Tanjiro continues passionately.

Your glossy orbs are set on your husband. Would he really do something like that? What if you witness the father of your unborn child taking the life of two other human beings? Your heart can’t take it, knees threaten to fail you.

“Hell no, I’m not going to kill him. It would be easy enough to kill him, but since it’s against the rules and all…I’m going to ruin him beyond recovery!”

Until your blurry head finally makes a decision and allows your feet to run.

Straight towards the two boys.

Straight into the firing line.

Straight into the sight of your now maniac husband.

“You won’t do any of these things, you hear me?”, you jeer at him with your new-found courage.

“(y/n)”, Genya breathes behind you.

“How dare you to talk to innocent children like that, Sanemi?”

The man in front of you furrows his eyebrows, hands clenched into tight fists while taking a step towards you.

“Get lost. Right now”, he hisses through gritted teeth.

You swallow hard, all nerves now tingling in sheer horror. This is the first and last warning, without any doubt. The look on his stone-cold face tells you more than urgently that Sanemi isn’t playing, that he doesn’t want you here.

Maybe it’s best if you go back inside and pretend that nothing happened. He himself said that he won’t kill them, after all…

“I’m not leaving”, you bite back.

But that would mean leaving Genya alone. That would mean giving up all of your principles.

“Will you act out like this towards our child as well?”, you continue while growing bigger and bigger in front of the two boys.

He might be your husband, the love of your life. That doesn’t mean you’ll always have to do what he tells you, tough. Instinctively, you clench your hands into tight fists with your glossy eyes almost piercing through him. Enough is enough.

“If our child acts as dumb as you do, I sure as hell will!”

Oh.

Your heart drops to the floor when a nauseous wave of agony hits you with full force. Sanemi is and has always been a hot-headed man who never thought twice about the things he said. But never, not even once in your entire relationship he insulted you.

Until now.

“Is this really how you feel about me? We should support each other, you should listen to me as well as-“

“Spare me with that bullshit, (y/n)”, Sanemi spits at you.

“Get.out.of.the.way. Can’t you hear me?”

It’s like you stop living for a moment. All this time, you did your best to understand him and his grief. Everything Sanemi does comes with a logical reason behind it, even though it’s hard to see from time to time. But lashing out at you like that?

“Stop being so disrespectful to me right now. I am your wife-“

“Right now, you’re my problem”, he jeers back.

“And now get off my sight and let me finish this real quick-“

You don’t know what made you act the way you just did. Was it his cruel behaviour, the way his words cut through your heart like a thousand knives? Before your husband is even able to finish his sentence, your palm races towards his cheek with full force.

The world around you goes silent, frightful gazes glued onto you while you can’t stop your tears from falling anymore.

“Is this how you’re acting around your pregnant wife by now, how you’ll treat innocent children? If that’s the live you chose, I’m not a part of it anymore”, you hiss through gritted teeth.

Suddenly, the urge to get as far away from him as possible becomes unbearable. Your feet start sprinting towards the estate on your own, carry you into your now so empty-feeling bedroom.

And finally, you allow yourself to break down and cry.

Is this really the man you love, that you’d give your life for? Your shaky fingers caress your belly mindlessly.

You can’t stay here. Not when Sanemi showed you a completely different face today. Not when this place doesn’t feel like home anymore.

-a few hours later-

“Fuck!”, Sanemi cries out on top of his lungs while dashing towards Obanai over and over.

Why can’t he get your stupid words out of his mind? The way you stood there with tears in your eyes, how he was literally able to hear your heart crack when those damned words left his mouth. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, to drag you into the fuckery with his little brother and that Kamado boy.

But why did he say all those dumb things, then?

“You seem off, Shinazugawa”, Obanai comments dryly, hitting the wind hashira with full force again.

“I guess I fucked up”, Sanemi mumbles.

What if you won’t forgive him for today? Your last words haunt him since the moment you left him standing in the rain.

“I bet you can talk your way out of it-“

“Hell nah. I don’t think she wants to see me tonight.”

“Did you ask her, though?”

“Who the hell do you think you are anyway? You’re the one to talk, not able to confess your feelings to Mitsuri”, Sanemi barks at the man next to him.

“But yeah, maybe I should get going…”

Coming home never fuelled him with so much fright. What if you’re still angry at him, if you refuse to even talk to him? Or even worse, what if you’ll really leave him?

Sanemi’s guts turn in an instant, feet now picking up their pace with every step. He can’t lose you. Not you, the light of his life. Not when you are the only ray of sunshine in this rotting hell. What the hell did he do? The fact that he even raised his voice at you is unforgivable.

Finally, his fingers grab the door that leads to your shared bedroom, finally he’s able to make up for his mistakes of today-

His eyes widen in sheer horror.

You’re gone.

Right there where your head should rest, there’s absolutely nothing.

Panic starts rising up his chest, forces his heart down his throat.

Did you leave?

He yanks out of your shared room, eyes roaming around each and every corner of your estate. But you aren’t there. You aren’t here.

“My lady is at the love hashira’s estate.”

Sanemi darts up immediately, greeted by the oh so familiar voice of your personal crow.

“Is she fine, why did she-“

“With all due respect, I suggest you to control yourself before making any more insensitive comments to my lady-“

“Who the hell do you even think you are you-“

“Your earlier spoken words really troubled her and my lady certainly does not deserve that.”

Without another word, your crow disappears into the darkness of night again.

Sanemi swallows hard. Fuck, did he really hurt you that badly? He never wanted you to feel bad, never wanted to hurt you. Damn, he only wanted to show Genya and that Kamado boy their places. It shouldn’t have hit you. Out of all people, why did he have to hurt you?

“I need to tell her”, he mumbles under his breath before dashing towards the love hashira estate.

-at Mitsuri’s-

“I can’t believe Shinazugawa said something like this to you, (y/n)! You are super far away from being dumb, after all! Here, eat another pancake and stay as long as you want.”, Mitsuri babbles while handing you another plate.

Your dry eyes are barely able to stay open any longer. All the grief, explaining, fighting and crying did apparently really wear you out. Good for you Mitsuri’s estate is near by and you just know she’ll always open her arms for you.

“Thank you so much for taking me in, Kanroji. I really don’t deserve your kindness”, you sniffle.

“You have to be joking, (y/n)! It’s my duty as your friend to be there for you anytime you need me! And also, I-”

Three violent knocks on Mitsuri’s wooden door almost send you over the edge. It’s past after midnight, the time closer to the morning than evening. Who would knock on Mitsuri’s door this late at night?

“Do you think that’s a demon?”, you mutter in horror, both pairs of eyes set on the door.

“I don’t think so. Let’s see!”

Before you’re able to stop Mitsuri, she rips open the door.

And reveals no other than your husband.

“Sanemi”, you breathe out.

Tears start swelling up your eyes in an instant when a flood of memories crushes you all over again. Just a few hours ago, your husband made very clear that he doesn’t want to see you again anytime soon. How did he find out that you’re here?

“(y/n), can we…have a talk?”, he mumbles with icy voice.

“Do you want to leave me?”, you blurt out.

“What?”

Is that really how you feel, what you think of him? That he’ll turn his back on you after a fight? He did say all those nasty things to you, though.

“I think I’m going out and…cook!”, Mitsuri announces while sprinting out of the door, leaving you alone in the room with all that tension and him.

Him, the man you love more than anything else in this world. And also him, who broke your heart like he never did before.

“You have to be kidding me”, Sanemi mutters under his breath.

You turn away before you lose your composure completely.

“Why are you here, Sanemi?”

“Do you really think I’m here to dump you!? You, my pregnant wife!? You can’t be fucking serious about that!”

In the matter of seconds, you find yourself surrounded by his usual so comforting arms that now hurt like daggers against your skin.

“Please, let me go, I can’t do this ri-“

“(y/n), please.”

His suffocated voice forces your eyes to dart upwards.

Instantly, your heart drops to the floor.

Is this really your husband, crying against your shoulder while pressing your body against his?

“I’m sorry for all the shit I’ve said, I’m sorry for making you feel this way. I’d never leave you, not when I’m even lucky for calling you mine. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this, I just…I just can’t stand them…”

“Sanemi…”

“And I get that I don’t deserve you and that I’m a jerk for hurting you. I know you could’ve had every man you wanted-“

“Sanemi!”, you snap at him, holding onto his face tightly.

“But you’re the one I want”, you finally cry out.

“But your words hurt me. Is this really how you feel about me? Do you really think I’m a burden?”

“I was out of my fucking mind for saying that to you! You’re my blessing, my everything, the sunshine in this rotting hell. You’re…You’re my wife, right?”

That innocent look on his now tear-soaked face runs shivers down your spine, reminds you that even though he acted out today, this man is still the Sanemi Shinazugawa you fell in love with years ago.

“I am your wife”, you press out before a new wave of tears haunts you down.

“I’m so sorry, (y/n). So so sorry”, he mutters again and again while kissing every tear away that escapes your eyes.

“And I’ll never talk to you like that again, I promise.”

“Will you promise to not treat Tanjiro and Genya like that ever again too?”

Sanemi shifts his weight underneath you, his orbs growing hard again. Was this too much to ask for? No. Even though you love Sanemi’s rough side as well, he simply can’t do something like this again. Not when you’re his wife, not when you are expecting his first very own child.

“I will. But only if these jerks leave me alone”, he grumbles before giving you a passionate kiss.

“That might be manageable. I want to go home now…”

“No problem, I’ll carry you-“

“You really don’t have to carry me-“

“Oh, but I sure as hell will.”

“HAVE A GOOD NIGHT YOU TWO! AND DON’T ACT LIKE A JERK AGAIN, SHINAZUGAWA!”

“Did you have to tell her everything?”

“She’s my friend, Sanemi. Of course I had to.”

Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix  @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld

@froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso  @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake

@lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @sugu-love @ryva @baku2345

@komelrebi-san @kentocalls @barbuse @sunshine7queen @lavenderdrxp

@yaninnaacu @hopefulbelievertimemachine @laurencrsnt

[neonln4]

i found a good boy, and he's on my side | lando norris smau

lando norris x reader | a little bit of best friend!oscar

summary: when y/n's ex writes a messy song about her, fans push for lando to break up with her (he doesn't even consider it)

fc: sabrina carpenter

kind of a part 2 to what a coincidence, but you don't have to read part 1 for this to make sense

warnings: non-existent angst, lando very much in love with y/n, very brief mention of cheating (not lando), maybe some typos

note: y/e = your ex

yourex

liked by user1 and 593,827 others

yourex Biting My Tongue out tonight

Finally sharing my truth

View all 1,384 comments

user1 WE LOVE YOU Y/E

user2 ready for the tea 🍿

ynfan2 PLEASE LEAVE Y/N ALONE I BEG WE'RE OVER YOU

ynfan1 "sharing my truth" OHHHH BROTHER

user3 the y/n fans getting nervous

ynfan2 not nervous, sick of his lies

user2 perhaps y/n isn't as perfect as you think

user4 anyone else just here for the music

user5 @ yourusername YOU ARE SO OVER

♡

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, yourbff, and 1,138,827 others

yourusername leng

View all 5,394 comments

ynfan2 UNBOTHERED QUEEN

user2 is she just pretending her ex didn't drop a shady song about her

user6 lando still in the likes ... this is so sad

yourbff your reminder to not wear the red top this weekend

yourusername you've seen my outfits already TRUST there's no red in sight

landonorris that's my girl

ynfan1 MOTHER IS GOING TO SILVERSTONE

user4 how has lando not dumped you yet

user5 you really don't deserve lando

user3 HAS LANDO HEARD THE SONG YET? DUMP HER!!!

ynfan3 what's with all the loser hate comments

landonorris my girlfriend is sooooo leng now come give me a kiss

yourusername calm down

yourusername on my way tho

♡

♡

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername, and 983,492

landonorris a little summer fun

View all 1,493 comments

user1 JEALOUS

yourusername who's the baddie

landonorris that's my girlfriend mate back off

ynfan2 WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS

user3 waiting for the dumping...

user4 crazy that they're still together

user8 i think some of y'all are a bit dramatic, the song wasn't even that bad and it's just his perspective

ynfan3 A LANDO FAN WITH A BRAIN

yourbff last pic i want her baddddd

landonorris so you don't want [redacted]'s number anymore?

yourbff WAIT I TAKE IT BACK

ynfan2 QUEEN Y/BFF FINALLY APPROVING OF ONE OF Y/N'S MEN

oscarpiastri you stole my best friend

yourusername we literally have plans next week

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 1,293,283 others

yourusername is this thing on? 🎤

View all 3,128 comments

ynfan1 MOTHER IN THE STUDIO!!!!!

ynfan2 the last pic has me crying 😭😭 i just know she's about to be a menace

user2 if she's actually making a response song that's kinda pathetic

user3 right? her fans all say y/e is using her for fame but she's also doing it

yourbff let me hear it first

oscarpiastri i better get the link first

landonorris ignore both of them, i get first dibs

user1 THE DRAMA if she's making a response song lando better get out of there quick before he's her next victim

user4 WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

ynfan3 all these haters camping on y/n's post omg she's so famous

ynfan4 WE LOVE YOU Y/N IGNORE THE LOSERS

♡

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 1,428,372 others

yourusername my turn🩷

surprise! planned to keep these in the vault, but i guess things change. 'vicious' and 'eternal sunshine' live performances out now on youtube! studio version out friday 💋

View all 5,382 comments

landonorris proud of you love 🤍

yourusername 🧡🧡🧡

ynfan2 OH MY GOD NO WAYYYYYYY

ynfan3 "my turn🩷" THAT'S MOTHERRRRRRRRR

ynfan1 love lando supporting her through it all that's a good man

ynfan4 SHE SPILLED Y/E IS SO DONE

yourbff i love you so much!!!

yourusername love you!!

user3 these songs are really good ... sorry for hating before

user1 some of y'all switching up in the comments, she could be lying!!

ynfan5 perhaps i misinterpreted the lyrics, but did y/e CHEAT ON HER???

ynfan3 pretty sure 👀

♡

yourusername

liked by yourbff, landonorris, and 1,391,283 others

yourusername it doesn't get, doesn't get better than this 🧡

View all 4,302 comments

yourbff LOVE Y'ALL SO MUCH

ynfan4 THESE HAVE TO BE LYRICS

ynfan3 more lover girl music coming soon LET'S GOOOOOOO

ynfan2 y/n writing her two shady songs about y/e then going back to writing cheesy love songs for lando we love to see it

landonorris how i obsessively adore you 🤍

ynfan2 y'all they're quoting future lyrics right in front of our faces i just know it

user3 it's not looking like a break up any time soon

oscarpiastri answer my texts

yourusername sorry been busy 🤭

oscarpiastri disgusting

yourusername NOT LIKE THAT.

ynfan5 Y/NLANDO WILL ALWAYS PROSPER

♡

landonorris

liked by yourusername, yourbff, and 1,028,832 others

landonorris we are never breaking up btw

View all 2,384 comments

ynfan2 LMAOOOOOO

yourbff i'll have to break all of your bones if you ever hurt her

landonorris the scary thing is that i actually believe that you would

oscarpiastri hurt her and your life is over

landonorris DAMN DID Y'ALL READ THE CAPTION OR NO

user3 they're kinda growing on me y'all ...

ynfan4 everyone say we love you mom and dad

user4 worst news of my life

user2 i'm gonna be forced to like her this is terrible

yourusername thank god

landonorris if you leave me i think that i just might lose it completely

yourusername don't ever quote my songs at me again