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anoms-world · 2 years

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another paranoia no in between

vasoconstrictor sugar vein pop up soidum puffy generally ///omega6 satuated fat low oxygen high blood pressure slow yet constctor/ rapid heart race with low oxegen in lung? pale cold skin .//high oxegen? low oxegen caused it by lower potasium //morning emotional mental stress in women ………..whit blood vasodilation swolen lip and redness generally for inflimation response to area and eye twiching /// low oxegen red facec //fasting mental stress anixity adrenaline v..v…………..whit milk

sugar salt lower calcium/calcium copper coffee ginger cafien ginsing hight fat licorice alcohol lowr calc magn warm you up for being cold narrow the blood increase blood presure in between meals likely or last./emotinal mental stress migrane./ ibuproveb lower sodium …./// slow swolling prb headack dizzy ///cortisol/progeston vein popup?means muscule hydrated with carb and water with balanced eloctri… lemon c iron oxegen water arabic coffee ginger sleeping chickpea zinc cafien lying down oat protien cacao magnisum potasium garlic b3 greentea? e? paracetamol aspirin the opisite its nitric oxide and eneregitic too much cause the blue and headack heart race take it with 12 source to slow down maybe with not much carb for better///confusion blulled vision nasua ///estrogen/insulin

death bill cortisol cushing stress fhear

8being alone with someone and its intimading side popup over you like eternal hell that look like heaven at first sight as the need 6they will try again over and over till make it 2dont give them power over you 1today word 4they will try to control and you dont even know what controliing is likley 5you will regrte for real like for forever regret its not any regret 3even if they were nice and humuntirian in their way 7i like how they together show confusion and uniq side of me they dont have yet they still like to denie and rather attack as usual with way too much pleasure 9the need to be human is a weird thing and its unlikeable usually when its about phiosiphy tho its give you the real comforting need that you want 10if they knew the things that matter to me is about every 10 secont it wouldnt matter to tgthem too

i tried to lie in someone face and i know for sure i failed tho it was so perfect no thats not it the truth my hope was too high that i deney his facts in his face till he gifed me the mad look and i sayed to myself better mimic the moment in a way or another and move tho i was completly blind with what i believed

oh i cant deny b12 is so addictive i most say tho i know i cut it down for while and i was some what creative without pincel so im back to b12 to feel numb it feel nice to not have concuese or catching someone else conconsios yea i dont need it here when your grave is next to you yet you have a long way ahead in life its tight stright life of your own had a long time to realise that cause have been distiracted with the graves all around me its easy to recocnize others from this angle from being overwhilmed

3 or 4 things whar you fear everything what you dot fear nothing at rare deferent time how do tou spend time with mental shifting or some mindset mimic or with coping machinesim and its the worse when hopes are up and empty how you dont sped time with nothingness often or usually

maybe its panic emotional and need to be scared that happened before when i was on date cheese and protien alone high nitric oxide? fat? sugar? i think its low vitamin c cause i was crave it last night ,,does b12 lower vit c or iron? okthe site say vit c prevent b12 absorb so so i think its satruated fat sugar plus heat low oxegen its low blood and an unhealthy fast attemp to increase it with sugar in this heat! what did i do!!!! ok what iif it was cold? oxgen is fine tho and pressure is slitley up likly and no breathing preblem so eat healthy in summer tricks allowed in winter? but yea still the same when i can do tricks? T.T

missing someone its aweid human conditin the fact they might just miss to be judged and its weird

who forget themself? me yess i do forget myself cause i kept masking without the abilty to go by so i slost myself somewhere just toos soon way too soon

doubt is defently the best way for detailed affective conclotion depending on the person and how observe it and how to use it i wouldnt give much attenchint anyway and that was the disavntage of it

laxk of sleep voas or foot insulin koad 1-5 coffee vefore fast

"Q. If coffee constricts blood vessels, why would it help migraine sufferers, since the constriction curtails blood flow, which would seem to cause more pain?

A. The simple notion that migraines are caused by the expansion of blood vessels (vasodilation) on the surface of the brain is, well, too simple. Migraines are complicated. Abnormal brain activity may precede vasodilation, but I think vasodilation is probably responsible for the painful part of the migraine attack. Caffeine tends to constrict blood vessels, which would seem to cause pain by cutting off blood flow. But mid-migraine, caffeine may relieve pain by returning enlarged and painfully distorted arteries back to their pain-free state."

"Migraines, cluster headaches, and exercise headaches are generally caused by vasodilation. Tension headaches are caused by vasoconstriction"

"Prolonged sleep onset latency increases the odds of hypertension by 300% (odds ratio: 3.27; 95% confidence interval,"

"These findings indicate that habitual short sleep duration is associated with greater ET-1-mediated vasoconstrictor tone."

lately its feels like exapnding a certain object with a hold without concloin or action idk what that mean emotionally yet in mentall side its fun and yet fee;s importart and cant let go easily need alot of analysing and relaxing to fix it the problem i dont feel like its more like beinf annoyed or stressed without clear or bvious reason or even a glimms i wonder if i am lying at myself ooor myself lying at me yea excatly i feel we reaching somewhere like this and i cant even think yet i wonder when things take it way to let it be negative thoughts isnt my thing and it take real long time to feel again as to be sane again to find home again idk what the meaning of life when its clearly over in others hands yea if you wonder about the attacks yea he attacked the miror the things they obssesed with

gotta cut out b12

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raisedinerebor · 5 years

Text

To the Heavens

Pairing : None. This is female reader centered.

Warnings: None really. Unless mentions of blood counts? Idk. There is a gun in this but it isn’t used. I know some people down like guns so it’s just a heads up.

Authors note: Should this just be a stand alone or would you like a part two? Bare in mind I don’t know how to link things so everything for this particular piece will be tagged To the Heavens.

Her back scraps against the tree as she collapses to the ground. She hugs herself squeezing tightly as she tries to keep from screaming. She couldn’t tell what was worse. The pain in her leg or the one in her heart.

She stuffs a fist into her mouth biting down on her knuckles as she pulls back the torn fabric at her thigh. Blood seeps profusely from a large gash following the smooth curve of her leg. She bundles up the sleeve of her hoodie in one hand and makes to wipe the blood away. Only to let out a breathless gasp and a harsh whimper as tears began to stream down the sides of her face.

She couldn’t scream, shouldn’t be making any noise at all. Who knew if those things were still out there. Or that it was all just a weird hallucination her brain was coming up with. She reaches for her back pack and opens it up. With trembling and blood soaked hands she searches frantically for her first aid kit. She lets loose a sigh of release when she finds it. Glad that she had remembered to pack it before running out her front door.

She pops it open and pulls out some gauze and medical tape. She doesn’t bother to try to save these pair of jeans but instead uses her pocket knife to cut away and the few pieces of thread holding the bottom part and the top part of her pants. She makes quick work of her leg not bothering to much on cleaning it. She can deal with that later when it stops bleeding.

If it stops bleeding.

After wrapping it she reaches down to unlace her boots hissing and clenching her jaw as a pain rockets up the side of her body. She then shimmies out of her jeans pulls out her other pair and pulls them on. Almost yelling again as the fabric brushes over the now bandaged wound. Shoving her jeans into her back pack along with the first aid kit she zips the bag up and puts it off to one side. Glancing at the watch on her wrist she gathers that she has around three hours until the sun sets.

Until she finds out whether or not this was a nightmare.

Felt real enough.

The car was destroyed. Maybe she was still sleeping in the wreck. She shakes her head. She can’t think about that right now. What she needs to do is get a fire going and lay down her sleeping bag.

Could she risk a fire? She runs a tentative finger over her revolver. She had six rounds. That wasn’t including the two other boxes in her bag.

She could fight them back. She could. Really. She could...

Using the tree as a brace she shuffles around gathering up small twigs, dried leaves, and moss. She sets them off to one side tripping and getting a mouthful of the pine needle floor and swears before getting back up. Her head swam and her legs felt like jello. Pushing on she gathered larger sticks from the ground and a few half rotted logs. Better than nothing.

Collapsing to the ground she wanted to just sleep. But she couldn’t do that now. Sleeping meant no fire and no fire meant no warmth. That would lead to hypothermia. Wanting to do nothing more than cry she sat up stretching her bad leg out in front of her. She piled the dry twigs and leaves together and used the moss and some fiber from the bark on the logs to start the fire. It took her a minute to find her magnisum fire starter in the dying light from the sun. The canopy from the trees blocking even more of the precious light than if she had found an open field.

She scraped the magnisum into the small pile of tinder and used the flint on the other side to start it. She began to swear and almost panic when it didn’t want to light. She almost began laughing when a burst of flame shot up from the ground. She dropped down and began to gently blow encouraging the flaming to burn hotter and higher.

Slowly and deliberately as to not put the small flame out, she piled on larger and larger twigs and branches. When the flame got dependent enough she pulled one of the logs on top. Only when she was able to unroll her sleeping bag did she allow herself to relax.

From the barley parted tree tops she watched the sky. The stars gently dancing in the dark sky. The moon seemed to smile down on her. Protecting her. She smiled and began to cry.

Where was that protection earlier today. When she really and truly needed it.

Her truck lay out there somewhere. Wrecked and completely totaled. First rammed into a tree and then rolled down the side of a hill. It was a God given miracle she wasn’t badly hurt. This wound. These bruises.

Were from them.

Grey colored things riding atop of hideous beasts. It was something out of her childhood nightmares. Something she would run to her mother crying about in the middle of the night. But her mother wasn’t here to comfort her this time.

She ran a filthy hand down her face and made a mental note to find a river and wash up the next morning. Not only could she get cleaned and find water, it should allow her to find a town, a house. Anything form of civilization. Her mom knew she was going out camping and where she planned to be. More importantly when she would be back.

She sat up still having one last thing to do before she went to sleep for the night. She laid her sleeping bag out and pulled her backpack close. She unzipped it and spilled out its contents. She had just grabbed a random bag so who knew what this one held.

She carefully sorted through the items before her. Half a bottle of Ibuprofen, two boxes of bullets, her torn jeans, another shirt, a sweater, two bottles of water, her first aid kit, a bag of jerky, and her harmonica were all in the main big portion. In the two smaller pouches she found a bottle of allergy medicine, her pocket sized sketchbook, five pads, matches, hand-sanitizer, and a compass. All in all not much but any of this things could be the difference between life and death for her.

Sighing she put everything back in. Eating a single piece of jerky she put her bag back down to act as a pillow before throwing a few more branches onto the fire. She covered up in the sleeping bag and un-holstered her pistol. She never camped her before so who knew what hid out here besides all of the wild animals.

And those things...

With the pistol resting on her chest she gazed back up into the sky. The moon slowly faded in and out of reality. A haze set upon her thoughts and so she fell into a restless sleep.

The breaking branches and loud voices is woke her in the early morning light.

#the hobbit #to the heavens #reader centered #let me know what you think!#hobbit fanfiction

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