#mad queue

[batkidsaremadkids]

Spoiler watching the rogues practice smiling without looking evil:

Spoiler: What the shit?

Oracle: What is it? You need back up?

Spoiler, weirded out: I might need therapy?

[angstandhappiness]

LMAO ACCURATE

not batman, but bruce being his true self

[batkidsaremadkids]

Jason babysitting Damian while everyone is out of town

Damian: I'm going to a dive bar in crime alley to confront an axe murderer suspect.

Jason: Seems like something a responsible parent wouldn't want you doing.... Good thing I'm a brother! Avenge them!!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Heh...Literally nothing personal, kid.

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[batkidsaremadkids]

[batkidsaremadkids]

Goons: I'm not going the fuck out there tonight! Didn't you see the set list?! Today they're doing "Ten Duel Commandements"! I'm not sucidal, boss.

Riddler: ?????

Tim, [pointing his staff at the human traffickers]: YOU ARE OUTGUNNED

Jason, [hyping him up]: WHAT?

Tim: OUTMANNED!

Jason: WHAT?!

Tim: OUTNUMBERED OUTPLANNED

Jason: PAY YOUR FUCKING TAXES!

Tim: PUT YOUR GUNS DOWN ON MY COMMAND

Jason: HAND EM OVER!!

Tim: THIS IS HAMILTON MY RIGHT HAND MAN!

Jason, [getting his guns out]: PWO PWO PWO PWO PWO-

Goons: *shaking* what the FUCK are Batman feeding his partners--

[sweeetestcurse]

Mads Mikkelsen as Dr. Hannibal Lecter 03/??

[spockvarietyhour]

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (2024) & Mad Max Fury Road (2015) directed by George Miller

[analviel]

It becomes a rage in little Gotham society, of acquiring a sibling by adopting one. Tim gets questions as the resident successful professional and because he's kind, compiles a 'get a kid' kit which consists of all you might need to forge the papers and history, just stick this usb in, answer several questions designed specifically to be geared to kids who wants little siblings and specifically to screen actual adults criminals, and input their name and your last name, and their favourite color and animal, and get all the papers sent to you as well as a stuffed toy to welcome your new sibling.

Oh I got an idea.

Jason gets in on it. What do you mean B, this is my little brother Tim, and his little brother Dami.

Tim *surprised pikachu face*.

The USB is called 'The Stork'.

It is not the weirdest Gotham trend in history but it does get quoted a lot for both being a bureaucracy nightmare as well as one of the contributing factor to lowering the crime rates in the next generation because more kids grow happy.

@cap-noodles

AU where 10 year old Tim decides he wants a baby brother, and he gives his parents a PowerPoint on it. Janet says she’s not carrying another child, especially when they may be anything less than perfect. Tim takes this to mean he has to find his own.

He finds 4 year old Damian and decides he is perfect.

Cue Talia accusing Bruce of stealing her son, and Bruce being like what son. Someone saw a child from Gotham carrying Damian, so Talia believes it was either Dick or Jason. The hunt is on to find Damian.

Meanwhile, Tim and Damian are hanging out, eating ice cream, and looking at pictures of Robin.

[good-to-drive]

[batkidsaremadkids]

Dick: I'm not saying work with him. I'm saying work around him.

Jason: It's cleaner and smarter to make him disappear.

Duke: Bonk him on the head, have O wipe his ID and credit rating, and dump him in Venezuela?

Jason: I'm so proud of you right know.

*fistbump*

[mutantninjamidlifecrisis]

[ach-sss-no]

i saw a post talking about how we cook our meat because we don't like getting worms

WOW

rude

we can't air this, by the way, that awful noise this jerk made was directly into the microphone and the audio peaked higher than mt doom

[sweeetestcurse]

NBC's Hannibal 02/??

[batkidsaremadkids]

Ok. But. Imagine Dick had that idea. He signed every single thing for school himself.

Then he left and Jason got adopted. Dick didn't want any of the teachers to catch on when "Bruce's" signature suddenly changes. (Because Dick was like 8, so he didn't copy Bruce's signature at all, just signed his name a particular way and stuck with it because changing it would cause issues and it was still working) So Dick goes to Jason and tells him all about it... and proceeds to sign everything for Jason with Bruce's name too. Eventually teaching him to forge it himself etc. (But it's still that fake-ass signature that Dick came up with at 8)

And then comes Tim. Who doesn't want to bother Bruce anyway so when Dick offers to teach him the signature? He's delighted.

Finally. Damian. Dick is his guardian. So Dick signs. (His own name.) And with all the Bruce is dead/battle for the cowl/Bruce is alive-drama going on he honestly... just kinda forgets about the signature.

Until. Damian mentions in passing that Bruce signed the field trip permission slip he turned in.

All the blood leaves Dick's face. A ruse they kept going for almost twenty goddamn years. Ruined. And they're about to be caught. Because his Bruce signature? Pretty damn far from the original.

Bruce gets called by the school. He gets toled Damian tried to forge his signature. He's confused. He did sign that. But he decides to investigate first. Bruce asks the teacher if he can see some samples of the different signatures.

At the school Bruce realises what a dumbass he is never having questioned that he didn't need to sign anything for any of his kids.

He tells the teacher he'll talk to Damian, but he still has permission to go on the field trip.

At home.... Bruce tries to learn his own fake signature.

(Sorry for hijacking your quote)

Duke: Bruce, can you sign something for school?

Bruce, shaking his head: If I sign this, you're going to have to learn how to forge my signature. If you sign it from the start, you'll be able to sign whatever you want and they'll never know.

[spockvarietyhour]

should not gloss over the use of McFeasting in this movie