#m: thor odinson

[intothestacks]

I was flipping through one of the new books I got for the library and I came across this:

Nick Fury canonically owns a guinea pig, y'all.

[lialine]

Scientist thor my beloved

Avengers Shuffle AU by @sreppub , thank you so much for making this au, it has been orbiting around my head for 3 months

[kqutie]

GROUP EFFORT x SLEEPY MAMA

relations. : platonic avengers/single mother reader ; romantic pairing still undecided

sum. : you're exhausted and happily fall asleep with vinny but your son has other plans now that his favourite heroes were close by

tags. : single mother reader ; baby is inspired by Jack-Jack from ‘the incredibles’ ; fluff ; slight crack fic ; comfort fic ; baby!oc ; widowed reader ; baby has multiple powers ; domestic fluff ; avengers babysitting a super baby

length : 3.4k

← part one | series masterlist

You explained your situation with Vinny as thoroughly as you could in your sleep-deprived state while he slept in your arms. Your STEM background habitually prompted you to provide your hypothesis on the matter, which Bruce and Tony perked up and shared a look at. Both appeared to immediately take a mental note of researching the incident with your husband later. The team vaguely remembered the event when it first happened and dominated the headlines. It was dubbed as a freak accident that happened too quickly to be stopped; they were gutted that even they couldn’t do something about it. Naturally, they had questions but were hesitant to inquire when you were noticeably slipping in and out of consciousness. 

Natasha furrows her brows in sympathy as she observes you and gradually moves her gaze down to Vinny. Despite your exhausted state, you force yourself to maintain your posture and continue safely cradling your son, prioritising his comfort over your own. She can only imagine the amount of stress you had undergone the last few days of having to take care of a son with rapidly expanding powers. ‘Just a normal person’ was what you called yourself, someone who was ‘incapable of properly caring’ for your son and his powers no matter how much you were willing to stick it out. In the end, you had to call it quits. She admired your resilience and maternal drive, all of them did and they were more than willing to help you. It was definitely a bizarre case but, rather than figure things out now, it was more important to ensure your and Vinny’s wellbeing.  

“How about we call it a night for now?” Steve suggests as you hand over the list you had written up, detailing the extent of Vinny’s acquired powers. It was an extensive list composed of several scraps of paper and sticky notes. The team's eyes collectively bulge at the sizable amount of notations. 

“Does he have super speed like me?” Pietro blurts out in excitement, eager to potentially have someone who can finally keep up with his speed. 

“I don’t know… maybe it’ll manifest one day. The list only seems to keep growing,” you try to smile but you’re so tired it comes out as more of a grimance. 

“Stay the night,” Tony says with fixed conviction, “it’s gotten late and you came to us for help with the baby, right?” Pepper smiles beside him and nods in agreement. The couple stand side by side, already settled on the decision and it appears as though nobody else was going to contest it.  

“We have plenty of rooms available. I’ll be happy to take you and Vinny to one,” Pepper offers as Tony nods with his usual charming grin. Neither gives you the chance to object nor does the rest of the team—all are determined to lend you a helping hand. Looking at their kind expressions made you tear up. It was such a relief. You haven’t felt this supported since your late husband was alive.  

“Y-yes please,”

“It’s settled then, over to you Ms Potts,” Tony gives the curve of Pepper’s butt a small pat as he moves away, “I’ll get the staff to bring up a cot as soon as possible,” The team follow the couple’s lead and wish you a goodnight as Pepper begins leading you to the available bedrooms with Vinny still asleep in your arms. 

𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧

The team remain in the living room discussing the current events. Pepper had informed them of which room you were sleeping in for the night when she came back, it was one of the bigger rooms considering they were organising a cot to be put in for Vinny, it also had an ensuite and small kitchenette for your convenience. 

The cot was taking a while to acquire and build due to the suddenness of the request but you assured her that having no cot wasn’t an ‘end of the world’ thing, you were more than happy to sleep with Vinny in the same bed. In fact, you had recently gotten into the habit so that you were easily alerted whenever Vinny spontaneously did something with his powers. However, Pepper doubts you would wake so easily in your sleep-deprived state; you fell asleep the instant your head hit the pillow. Thankfully, Vinny remains fast asleep beside you. 

“You think it was the gamma rays, Bruce?” Tony asks nonchalantly as he settles himself atop the sofa arm, snacking on chocolate-covered almonds. 

“It’s highly likely,” Bruce has been absorbed in research ever since you had left the room, typing away on his laptop. “Reports of the incident don’t flag up anything suspicious happening,” Tony raises a brow and there’s a knowing silence that fills the room momentarily, “...but we may just need to do some more digging,” Bruce was willing to continue his research but Tony insisted on the work day being over and the need for a good work-life balance. All Pepper’s influence. 

“We can continue the research tomorrow, Banner. Meeting a teleporting, multi-superpowered baby warrants some rest for the night, at least,” With a shake of his head, Bruce relents to Tony’s insistence and finally closes his laptop. Pepper looks at her fianceé proudly, Tony has come so far and has truly grown into the hero many admire him to be. His under-eyes are looking much healthier too. After his initial hesitation, Bruce and Tony join everyone else in the central living room again. 

“Will the baby and his mother be staying here for a long time?” Thor asks thoughtfully, leaning back into the sofa as Loki contemplates the question beside him. It makes sense for the mother and son duo to stay considering how unpredictable the child’s powers are. 

“It would be for the best,” Steve announces, receiving a nod of agreement from the majority. “The baby needs to be analysed so we can better help the mother and separating the two is entirely out of the question.”

“We’re not subjecting the child to any experiments though, right?” Bucky asks, a hardness coming over his expression and darkening his features. Everyone holds their breath and looks to Tony for answers. It was a collective look that pleaded opposition to the idea. In their line of work, experimentation on children was, unfortunately, a common occurrence and was something they actively pursued in putting an end to.   

“Surely not,” Natasha says lowly through gritted teeth. Everyone understood how important the topic was to her.

“‘Course, not.” Tony states matter-of-factly and shrugs, “There are ways of collecting data without having to partake in those old-school, traumatising experiments,” 

The Maximoff twins look at one another before Pietro suggests the obvious, “So… babysitting?” Tony shoots him with a pair of finger guns and cheerfully announces his victory. 

“I’m afraid no prize for you though—”

A giggle cuts through the room and everyone turns to the source immediately. Not again. 

Sat on the coffee table was Vinny, no longer asleep and having teleported into the living room once more. For a moment, nobody knows what to say or do until Vinny reaches his arms up, claps and giggles happily while staring up at Bucky, his little arms still raised. The supersoldier’s expression softens considerably at the child, his heart warmed by the infant’s glittering eyes and gummy smile. Giving a small wave and wiggling his fingers, Bucky is rewarded by another giggle before Vinny makes grabbing motions at him with his small, pudgy, baby hands. The gesture, however, makes him pause entirely. 

“That means he wants you to pick him up, Cyborg,” Sam laughs at his friend’s frozen state, it was hilarious to see someone who was usually so stoic and threatening become a headless chicken in front of a baby.

Slow and steady, Bucky reaches out and takes Vinny in his arms. The infant squeals in delight and kicks his legs when the soldier lifts him into the air before settling him on his lap to face the rest of the team. Vinny leans back against Bucky with a smug-looking grin as the brooding assassin sits rigidly behind him and whose large hands keep him in place by grasping his small torso on either side. It almost scares him how his fingertips touch when holding Vinny – the child is so tiny, so pudgy, soft, and fragile. Bucky’s face goes stock-still as does his limbs — he becomes indistinguishable from a stone statue. 

Pietro, Clint and Tony burst out laughing at the sight, pointing fingers at Bucky and making little Vinny grin in delight, their tangible joy is infectious to him. Even Sam is snickering from Bucky’s peripheral, no longer worried about getting hit upside the head since the supersoldier was otherwise preoccupied. Finding their laughter contagious too, Vinny joins in, oblivious to the glaring super soldier whose lap he was happily seated on. 

“He looks like a little prince in an oil painting sitting on a throne!” Pietro comments in between gasps of laughter. Tony snaps a picture and everyone slowly sees the vision Pietro had been calling out. It was comical. Clint was desperately gasping for breath as Loki snickered under his breath and Thor agreed to the ‘little prince’ observation.

“That child makes for an excellent prince!”

“But a throne? More like a stone statue,” Sam snorts as Steve struggles to keep a straight face. 

“Not. Funny.” Bucky growls lowly, paying no mind to the way the child in his lap plays with his fingers, unsuccessfully trying to pry his grip off his torso whilst babbling incoherent words. 

“You having fun, little guy?” Steve asks, leaning down to meet eyes with Vinny who responds happily, although in his nonsensical baby language. “I see, I’m glad,” Vinny prattles on again and holds a conversation with the soft-eyed, gently smiling captain for a good two minutes as the rest of the team looks fondly at the scene. 

Moments like this were what life was about. 

Evenings with the entire team were an eagerly anticipated activity, however, to have such a precious child join in on the event was a welcome occurrence. It felt like a family coming together to indulge in each other’s warm company. It was calm and mundane but it was what everyone craves atop the tumultuous life they lead. 

“What did the child say?” Thor’s booming voice cuts through the conversation and Steve turns to find him with a wide smile, eagerly anticipating an answer. 

With a roll of his eyes and a tsk, Loki answers before Steve can utter a word of explanation, “The captain doesn’t actually understand the child, he’s just entertaining it,”

“It’s ‘he’, not ‘it’, Loki,” Wanda corrects but is ignored by the god. 

“But they were conversing rather fluently just then,” Thor insists. Sometimes the group wonders if the Thunder God liked to play dumb just to annoy his younger sibling.  

“It doesn’t matter, the captain was speaking properly whilst the child wasn’t speaking any coherent language,” The two continue to bicker the way siblings do, as usual, while everyone else turns back to Vinny. The child, however, keeps his gaze locked on the two gods, his round, doe eyes transfixed on them with a blank expression before he suddenly smiles and squeals. 

“Ahh-yah!” the room suddenly shakes, as if a minor earthquake had occurred and the gods finally stop bickering. Everyone’s attention was on Vinny again. Wide-eyed, Bruce scours through the list of powers you handed over earlier and tries to find some sort of explanation. 

“What the hell was that?” Tony breathes in disbelief and turns to his lab partner, “Banner?”

“I think it’s the ‘loud sound (crying, cheering, laughing) = earthquake’,” 

“Echokinesis…” the two scientists conclude at the same time.

Tony slowly swipes his hands down his face, “This kid is gonna be a handful,” everyone stares, wide-eyed at the giggling child still sitting on Bucky’s lap. Vinny gurgles happily at the attention before assuming the stares are to commence one of his favourite games. Bringing his small, chubby hands up to his face, Vinny covers his eyes, cooing softly before revealing his eyes with a ‘dah!’. His proud grin is more gums than teeth but he’s just happy to play one of his favourite games ever. 

The adorable display makes the team smile, easily forgetting the earlier incident of uncontrolled power displayed by the innocent babe. Vinny continues playing peek-a-boo with everyone, who gradually joins in, Wanda being the most enthusiastic as she softly sings ‘peek-a-boo’ to the baby opposite her. Vinny had joined the light singing as well but with muddled coos instead. All is well and nerves have just begun to settle as Vinny covers his eyes for about the umpteenth time, elongating the innocent game. However, the team doesn’t mind as long as the baby is entertained and not crying.  

“Peek…a…boo!” Wanda sings once more but, this time, when Vinny reveals his eyes from under his small baby hands, two tunnels of bright green light shoot forward and everyone on the other side of the room ducks for cover. The parallel laser beams reached as far as the opposite wall and almost tore straight through it. As Vinny’s merry giggles fill the air, everyone slowly regains their composure and stares in disbelief at the destroyed couch. 

“The kid has fucking laser eyes too?!” Clint exclaims in disbelief, slack-jawed at the destructive evidence of Vinny’s power. 

“Language,” Steve promptly reprimands despite his own astonishment at the child’s display while Bucky had promptly covered Vinny’s tiny ears with his hands. Loki laughs joyfully, looking at your babbling baby boy with glittering amusement. 

“What an incredibly gifted child,” Loki praises with a smirk, his hair tousled by the scuffle but he pays it no mind.

It was then that Vinny reached his little arms up to Natasha, babbling happily before changing his mind and turning to Tony, only to change his mind again and make grabby hands at Thor. Everyone watches as the infant conflicts with himself, not knowing who he wants to be held by more before he falls forward and tumbles out of Bucky’s arms, or rather a duplicate of him does. In fact, a swarm of baby Vinnys fall off Bucky’s lap and begin shakily waddling over to a different avenger each.   

“Oh my…” Natasha gasps, cuddling a happily cooing Vinny to her chest — a duplicate one, at least. Looking around, every Avenger was made to cradle a duplicate baby as they tried to contain their shock and amazement. “This is crazy…”

“Wh-what do we do?” Pietro asks no one in particular as Wanda tries not to fawn over the baby Vinny in her arms.  

“Just make sure he doesn’t start crying or they’ll all start crying and the tower will end up collapsing on everyone because of their echo-kiss-thing,” Sam advises, panic swimming in his eyes as he remembers the shrieks of his baby nephews and how they had the power to make all nearby adults cry with them too. 

“N-now we don’t necessarily know if the baby can use more than one power at once or if his duplicates can perform powers atop the duplication. But I think it’s safe to say that that’s not the case–” Bruce cuts himself off as the baby in his arms coos, mesmerised by his moving jaw and reaches up a tiny hand to touch the scientist’s face. The duplicate Vinny in his arms begins babbling as if Bruce had been talking to him the entire time and they were pleasantly conversing. Charmed by the display, Bruce smiled softly and cooed at the infant in his arms — there was just something about babies that brought joy and peace to a person, he wanted to savour that feeling as much as possible.   

“Are you sure about that?” Clint asks and raises his Vinny, who had started dribbling and blowing bubbles with his spit. The bubbles should have easily disappeared but they began to float around and soon enough all the duplicate Vinny babies were blowing bubbles with their saliva. 

“I don’t know if that’s disgusting or adorable…” Tony comments, staring in mild awe and disgust at the display whilst bouncing the giggling baby in his arms. Pepper walks up beside him with an equally disturbed but awestruck expression. 

“How can they float like that?”

“You want to pop it, little human?” Thor chuckles as the Vinny in his arms reaches for the floating bubbles. Wanting to keep the child entertained, Thor obliges and pops a bubble for him only to yelp at the sudden electric shock he was subjected to. To a god of thunder, that felt like an insect bite, however, that would not be the case for his teammates. “Be careful my friends! This child was able to encase electricity within these innocent bubbles!” 

“Oh god! What are you?!” Sam asks in disbelief at the baby in his lap. Vinny simply giggles behind his small hands – he looks like the perfect picture of innocence but the team of heroes know better. 

Tony hands Pietro a wooden coaster from the coffee table to quickly pop all the bubbles with so that they don’t injure someone. The speedster nods but hands him his duplicate Vinny before zipping off to do the task. It didn’t take longer than five seconds to complete for Pietro and everyone could finally breathe a sigh of relief. 

“This is gonna be…interesting…” Tony observes with some hesitance as Bruce snorts a laugh and gives him a raised-brow look. 

“I could’ve told you that, Tony,” Sam chuckles. 

“But we can still help Vinny and his mother, correct?” Steve asks, feeling his heart clench as the baby in his arms cuddles into him with a suppressed yawn. The supersoldier watched, mesmerised, as the child slowly blinks and gradually fell asleep while sucking on his little thumb. 

“Of course!” Wanda declares and looks at Tony, “Even if it’s going to be difficult, we can’t just turn them away,” 

“I never said we were going to turn them away,” Tony smiles and relaxes his shoulders when the duplicates disappear in a small puff of smoke, revealing that Steve had the real Vinny. “They’re free to stay as long as they need,” the team smiled in relief at the assurance. They weren’t going to admit it aloud but they had already grown an attachment to the son and mother pair. It would be a good change of pace to have the two around the tower. 

“Splendid! I like the child very much already! And the mother is lovely, herself,” Thor speaks for everyone in the room, lowering his voice for the sake of Vinny who Steve had cradled to his chest and was gently rocking, “She seems very kind and loving, much like our mother, right, Loki?” the blonde god happily slings his arm over his younger brother’s shoulders and brings him close. 

“I suppose so,” Loki agrees with a scowl and stubbornly shrugs off his brother’s arm, who laughs goodnaturedly at the gesture.

“What about Nick?” Natasha asks, making everyone tense up but it was a subject that couldn’t be avoided. 

“I don’t think Nick is heartless enough to separate a mother and child or subject the little one to anything traumatic,” Steve was confident in that, “but if he shows otherwise, we’re putting a stop to it immediately,” Everyone nods and Pepper volunteers to call the S.H.I.E.L.D director about the situation. 

“It’s late,” Tony excuses and chuffs at the look Pepper sends him, “and, even though he’ll be ready at any time of the day. It’s best to start this tomorrow. The baby’s asleep anyway,”

Everyone notes the peace that had befallen the room. Everything was quiet except for the slumbering child’s soft breaths and their hushed voices discussing the topic. Looking at the clock, time had already passed so quickly.  

“This little one was such a handful,” Wanda comments, “no wonder his poor mother looked so…” she chooses her words carefully, “troubled,”

“I would have given up and collapsed already,” Clint confessed with a good-humoured snicker, “she must be a super mom to have taken care of a super baby all by herself for longer than a day,” hums and nods of agreement were shared throughout the room. The feat you accomplished was beyond their comprehension. Even though they were experienced in handling unusual, potentially dangerous events like this, they had struggled quite a bit from only one evening with Vinny. But you were one person without any special abilities or experience, and yet, you had lasted longer than they did. 

“A mother’s love is otherworldly,”  Thor concludes and, again, everyone hums and nods in agreement. 

navi. | series masterlist

a/n : sorry this took so long my loves! this was very vinny and avengers centric also but mother dear deserves the rest, i hope everyone is enjoying the series so far. i will soon be opening up requests for this series to see what you lovelies want to see happen and the chapters will be based on those requests -- eventually anyone can read this series in any order they want!

[comicwaren]

From Ultimates Vol. 4 #006

Art by Juan Frigeri and Federico Blee

Written by Deniz Camp

[adrixivy]

Imagine the Avengers have a shared album. It was an album that they all made so they can update on what they’re doing and it was all Peter’s suggestion so the team could bond more. Yet Peter changes it up one day by dumping pics of the Avengers from afar and they’re all looking up, wondering where the fuck is Peter taking the photos from.

Then Peter dumps 0.5 pics of Tony when he was sleeping or Tony simply allowed it because he was tired to say anything and it was the most ridiculously outrageous photos of Tony that Tony is immediately up from his chair in the lab and finding Peter, yelling about him deleting the photos.

Peter only does it when Tony hasn’t eaten a full meal or anything in a day or has not slept at all since he was busy overworking himself. And it always works.

Soon, the shared album that was previously about updates became a place to dump the most ridiculous photos of the Avengers or the shenanigans they do that it would be a PR nightmare for their PR team to manage(SHIELD is definitely their PR team even though Nick Fury is not paid enough for it)

Clint, dumping photos of Bucky and Steve on the couch together: *captioned ‘Look at this lovebirds!’*

Bucky checks his phone and is immediately showing Steve and the two glare at the vent at the left corner of the room where they hear distant giggles as Clint crawls away

Peter sending a photo of Tony and Stephen making out in the kitchen: *captioned ‘EW MR STARK GET A ROOM!’*

Tony pauses and pulls away from Stephen who frowns when he pulls his phone out. Tony gasped in horror and showed the phone to Stephen before spotting his son and immediately charging at him (“Peter Benjamin Parker-Stark, you get your tiny ass here right now!”) Stephen sighs and sends the cloak after his lover and son. Cloak wraps around Peter who screams for mercy and Tony grinned

Bruce sending a picture of Sam drinking a Caprisun: *Captioned ‘Peter I think that’s yours..’*

Peter suddenly appears and tackles Sam, screaming that it was his last one and the man now owns him a box. Sam is screaming back, saying ‘Get Stark to buy that, he has money!’ and the two is fighting till Steve pulls them apart

Natasha sends a photo of Clint surrounded by fire as he burns down their kitchen for the fifth time this month: *captioned ‘Guys he’s at it again’*

Tony immediately presses a button that shoots out foam that extinguishes the fire from the ceiling, covering Natasha and Clint in it. Natasha is fuming and Tony just realised he’s mistake and locked down his lab.

Rhodey sends a picture of Tony partying in his suit during that one party he did when he was dying. Tony is embarrassed of how idiotic he was. Peter is cackling before he’s immediately silenced by a glare from the older man

Tony starts to mess with Steve one day after he finds records of him in the past when he went through his father’s things. Tony sends a photo of Steve pre-super serum that he happened to find and Steve rolls his eyes and groans when Bucky laughs at him, making fun of the blonde (“The dwarf who was like ‘I can do this all day’ with a bleeding nose, HAH!”) The rest of the Avengers laugh, snicker or is genuinely surprised how skinny Steve actually was

Tony uploads a black and white video of Steve in the army in the past, seemingly forming a plan before the camera cuts to Bucky’s photo in a pocket watch as Steve checks the time. He quickly shuts the pocket watch and hides it. Bucky is slightly flustered and Steve is embarrassed. (“Tony where the hell are you getting this!”)

(⬆️Inspired by that one scene in Captain America: The First Avenger!)

I can picture Peter and Wanda sending edits of the Avengers they found on Tiktok to the album or videos they found online of the Avengers epic fails. Since they’re probably the only two who has Tiktok or scroll through social media and definitely wanted the Avengers to see this. Or simply any news that they find hilarious or the Avengers needed to know. Tony joins on the news because Friday always updates him

Wanda sending an edit of Natasha on TikTok: *Captioned ‘Look at this hot momma!’

Natasha is flattered, chuckling as she rewatches the edit and wondering where people got this clips from.

Peter sends a video titled ‘The Avengers Fails!’ which show Tony being thrown back to a signboard, Steve falling from a building with a yell, Thor being thrown back to the hulk which the hulk is angered by and he’s thrown again at a billboard, Wanda tripping over a step, Clint being dragged along in the air at the back of the Quinjet screaming, Bucky’s arm being thrown in Tony’s face, Rhodey and Tony crashing into each other, Stephen accidentally letting out an ancient monster and desperately trying to close it back up and finally Natasha’s gun being slapped away by a giant when she shoots it. The Avengers are immediately embarrassed and Friday plays the video to get their egos in check once a month. Peter has multiple compilations of fails online so he isn’t embarrassed. He believes it’s part of his spidey persona so he embraces it with open arms. The Avengers find it impossible to embarrass him when he’s Spiderman.

Tony sends an online magazine, specifically one page where it’s all about Steve. And his magnificent ‘America’s Ass’. Steve sighs and knows Tony has something to do with the magazine when he actually doesn’t. Bucky secretly downloads the page

[morgangalaxy43]

The Avengers 2012 era was the best time ever in the fandom

Thor loves pop tarts, Clint lived in the vents, Bruce and Tony did science together, Steve was the mom friend of the team and did art in his free time, Natasha was cool aunt of the team, Loki was there too and a bunch of other characters like Peter, Sam, Bucky, Vision and Wanda all lived in the Avengers tower together

It was a much simpler time where everyone in the fandom was chill and having fun together

[marveldaily]

Children of Odin.

[soranatus]

Loki By Hikari Toriumi, a story artist at Walt Disney Animation Studios

[marvelgifs]

THOR: RAGNAROK (2017), dir. Taika Waititi

[hurtspideyparker]

If Civil War didn't end in divorce and everyone lived together Part 2

Read Part 1 and Part 3

Tony: Why is Underoos mopping the ceiling?

Sam: Told him since he's sticky that's his chore

Bucky: It's only fair he helps out around the house

Tony: Hm. Makes sense

-

Vision cooked dinner:

Peter: *pushing around food to make it look eaten*

Natasha: *surreptitiously spitting into napkin*

Steve: *taking small bites with tons of water*

Bucky: *just stares at full plate*

Tony: Well this is disgusting, I'm ordering pizza

-

Sam: C'mon man stop moping around, you gotta get yourself a girl

Bucky: Ok.

Sam: Ok? Okayyyyy! I know-

Bucky: Give me your phone

Sam: Oh you got a number in mind already hotshot? *hands phone over*

Bucky: *ring* Hi Sarah ;)

Sam: BOY-

-

Peter: Ned thought you would seperate your colours from your lights but he also thought you'd be homophobic so I don't pay him much mind cuz clearly I'm more of a superhero expert than him but he does have a 2% better average than me in history so like maybe you do hand wash your clothes and that's why I asked what underwear you wear because-

Steve: *listening intently with apprehension and alarm*

Natasha: I can't believe you found the one person on Earth who talks more nonsense than you

Tony: I know right, it's incredibly unnerving. I'm planning on adopting him

-

Peter: Mr. Stark I have to tell you something. I think Vision is a... *whispers* pervert

Tony: Um, why?

Peter: He keeps floating through my room without knocking! He saw me changing, he saw my nipples !

Tony: Well if anyone's a predator here it would be you. I mean showing your nipples to a 2 year old? Deplorable.

Peter:

Peter: Oh god, I'm the pervert...

-

Bucky: Y'know animosity isn't good between teammates. I think we should spend more time together

Sam: Am I being punked right now? Where's the camera

Bucky: I'm serious. I think it would be healthy for us to bond

Sam: Okay fine I'll bite... what did you have in mind

Bucky: Wanna go for a run?

Sam: *slams door in Bucky's face*

-

*staring at Bucky's sparkly clean metal arm*

Bucky: Dishwasher?

Peter: Dishwasher :)

(later that day)

Bucky: I've decided to let the child live

Peter: YoU wHaT?!

-

Thwip

Tony: Who took my coffee cup, It was right here

Thwip

Bruce: Um, has someone seen my book? I just had it

Thwip

Steve: I could've sworn I was holding a pen a moment ago

*giggling from the ceiling*

Tony: Young man I will take those webshooters away if you use them for shenanigans and rascality

Peter, muffled: Mr. Hawkeye told me to!

Clint: Oh so you're just gonna rat me out like that?

Peter: Sor- OOF

*falls out of ceiling vent*

-

Sam: You're in my spot

Bucky: There are no spots, it's a common area

Sam: Well that's my spot

Bucky: Did you buy the chair??

Sam: No, but everyone knows that's where I sit. Right Steve?

Steve: Oops I forgot something in my car, be right back *leaves*

Sam: Still my spot

Bucky: Still not

Sam: *sits on him*

Bucky: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL THE COUCHES ARE FREE-

Sam: IT'S MY SPOT YOU CAN'T TAKE A MAN'S FAVOURITE CHAIR-

BUCKY: YOU HAVE ISSUES GET OFF ME-

(one hour later)

Steve: Hey so turns out I don't have a car! Isn't that funn...

Sam & Bucky: *Squeezed awkwardly on the chair together*

Steve: I think I left something in my car

-

Steve: Leave the bedroom door open when you have Vision in there

Wanda: UGH you're so protective

Tony: Teenagers, am I right? Caught Pete reassembling my particle accelerator at midnight because he needed to neutralize a miniature nuclear bomb he nabbed off some guy he neglected to tell me was trying to kill him

Steve:

Steve: Wanda y'know what do whatever you want

Wanda: Really?

Steve: Yes just keep being normal. At least I can read about our issues in a parenting book

-

Thor: Ah, new warriors I see! Good to make all your acquaintance. But why are you so grumpy my friend?

Bucky: *glaring*

Peter: He's always like that. It's um, P- P- PMS? Wait -

Natasha: Yes it's PMS

Wanda: He's got it bad

Steve: *genuinely concerned* Bucky you didn't tell me something was wrong. What can I do to help?

Bucky:

Bucky: I like chocolate

-

Wanda: Welcome to the first annual girls night! This place reeks of men, so I thought we needed some women time

Pepper: Why is Vision here?

Wanda: I get sad when he's gone

Natasha: Why is Pietro here?

Pietro: Slay queens

Wanda: Moral support I think

Maria: Why is Peter here?

Wanda: He looked really upset when I said he wasn't included and I felt bad

Wanda: Anyways... yay girls! Who wants me to paint their nails?

Peter: ME ME ME

-

Steve: Pancakes or waffles?

Natasha: Pancakes

Steve: Good because I don't have a waffle maker

Natasha: Then why would you ask-

Steve: It's important for your voice to be heard, as team leader I value your opinion

*2 minutes later*

Steve: Good morning Clint, pancakes or waffles?

Clint: Waffles

Steve: Oh no.

-

Some of these were based on requests (ex. more Sam & Bucky, dad Steve w/ Wanda) so if you have certain dynamics you enjoy let me know !

[waltermis]

I miss them 🥹🥲

[the-lemon-that-urged-the-lime]

i understand that ragnarock is the funniest thor movie just because,,,,,, it has the most jokes and all of them are hilarious but some of you are ignoring the absolute comedic genius that is thor 1. the entire movie is set off by loki essentially performing a prank on his brother because he thinks he's dumb and doesn't deserve to be king but it backfires so horribly that loki finds out he's adopted from a race of people he was taught to hate and his brother is straight up exiled. and when he tries to talk to his father about this he doesn't want to talk to loki SO much that he falls into a coma and loki becomes king. i cannot stress enough how he just accidentally performed a coup. he literally just played a prank on his brother and ended up on the throne of asgard

[dailyflicks]

Just wasn't expecting a code green. If you hadn't been there, there would have been double the casualties.

THE AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON (2015)

[dailymarvelstudios]

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015), dir. Joss Whedon

[c0ffinfl0p]