#lyrics from: soft universe - aurora

[secret-smut-sideblog]

Pulling Strings

Astarion x F! Tav

18+ consensual body control, intimacy aversion/exploration, sub/dom, total control, body caging, restraint, rough sex, p-in-v, vulnerability, crying after sex, aftercare, tenderness

Tav has caught on that her favorite vampire doesn't enjoy touching or being touched by others. But she has a suggestion to possibly help that piques his interest...

Masterlist

-

As Tav talked to the merchant she felt two cold finger taps on her wrist.

She smiled, turning her head to give him a nod, returning to bartering.

The signal that he wanted to initiate their scenario.

After the tiefling party, she had asked if he had actually wanted to bed her. She had her suspicions, and ever forward, had asked plainly.

He tried to dance around an answer, but she knew him too well by then. Eventually relenting, he had said that he had done it out of obligation. Explaining that he needed protection, and bedding her was a fast track to devotion. Or, at least, was supposed to be.

That conversation led into more, delving into his aversion to intimacy and touch itself. Tav was not upset, if anything she wanted to help.

"Well, do you want to be intimate with others?" She offered curiously on one of those late nights they stayed up talking.

"I don't know, maybe?" He scoffed, flicking his hand up in annoyance. "It's something I'm going to have to get over eventually, if I'm ever going to be a functioning member of polite society."

"Not necessarily," Tav mused, taking the wine bottle he offered to her. "There's lots of ways to get around things like that and still be around others."

Her eyes lit up in thought. "You could wear gloves, or even hire an escort to practice with."

He gave her a withering look. "Darling, though I was one in some respects, I'm not going to trust my comfort with a sex worker I don't even know."

He threw his hands up dramatically. "I would much rather have someone like you if there was to be any 'practice' to be had." His pointer and middle fingers curling at the word.

"That's not a bad idea, actually." Tav suggested, tilting her head slightly.

He looked at her, his own head tilting opposite hers. Mouth pursing up to the side in consideration.

"Go on..." He drawled.

"Well, I could be like a puppet. You steer me where you want me and I stay there." She mused, leaning back on her side. "I wouldn't move unless you moved me, something like that."

"Hmm." He lilted. Pausing, seeming about to say something. Then just offered another thoughtful "Hmm..."

"Sleep on it. You don't need to decide now, and I'm fine with whatever you need." Tav shrugged, taking another swig from the bottle.

"If you decide you want to try, just give me a tap." She demonstrated on her wrist, two fingers lightly tapping.

Three nights later, she was at the firepit. Her hands clasped behind her back, leaning over to inspect the soup Gale was excitedly explaining. Two little strikes against the inside of her wrist brought her eyes back up.

She gave him a warm smile and a near imperceptible nod, turning back to Gale to give him her undivided attention about the intricacies of beef broth.

That night, she asked at the entrance of his tent.

"Come in, sweet thing."

"Where do you want me?" She asked, stepping inside. Already leaving her limbs loose and comfortable.

"Here..." He waved his hand at the space next to his bedroll.

She sat down, legs crossed neatly beneath her. Hands resting palm down in her lap. Waiting for his direction.

He hovered across from her at first, uncertain.

"You're in control. I'm your marionette. Move me." She encouraged, turning her wrist face up on her knee. Letting her hand fall open, relaxed.

He looped his fingers around her wrist and lifted experimentally.

True to her word, she kept her arm limp enough for him to puppet. Steering it around in a circle.

This seemed to give him more confidence, pulling her wrist down to the floor of the tent.

She followed, laying her head down. He adjusted her legs into a slight curl on her side. Pulling her arm up into a natural resting position.

He reached behind her and grabbed a small pillow, lifting her head and sliding it beneath.

He came to lay down next to her on his back. A good distance still between them, but not so far as to feel cold.

"Good?" He whispered.

She nodded, settling into the form he had set for her.

He leaned up and blew out the candle.

"Goodnight, darling." He hushed, laying back down in the dark.

That first night, that had been it. Just her laying in the dark next to him. His impressed eyes appraising her the next morning when he found her in the same position he had left her in. Breathing softly in her sleep.

As the nights went on, and as they grew closer outside of this arrangement, he got more curious.

Bringing her closer to him, touching her. Experimenting with angles and positions.

He had explained after that first night that he didn't want her to be entirely still. 'Too much like a corpse...' He had shivered. He still wanted her to interact with him, just in small movements that he could lead.

If he led her hands to his chest, she could circle her fingers softly there. If he led to his ear, she could massage it gently.

And, if at any point he no longer wanted that touch or found it uncomfortable, he would simply lead her hand away.

If he felt he wanted to be done entirely for the night, he would tap her wrist again, and she would get up and go. No questions asked.

Those nights, oddly enough, were the ones she felt closest to him. That he felt safe enough with her to end touch that he had initiated without fear of retaliation.

It was endlessly exciting for her when he found a touch or position that he really enjoyed.

One of his favorites being her chest to his back, leaning into her in a seated position. One of her arms loosely wrapped around his waist, her legs bent at his sides. Her other hand scratching gently along his scalp.

He leaned into her like this, head tilted back, legs nestled between hers. Practically purring as her fingernails traced lines along his scalp.

His hands would rest on her thighs, sometimes still, sometimes trailing back and forth. Her hand around his waist stroking his side softly with her thumb.

He would even fall asleep in this position, head turning into her neck. Occasionally pulling her down to lay with him, but sometimes falling entirely asleep against her chest.

She never moved from anywhere he put her, unless he gave her the signal that he was done for the night.

It even started proving beneficial outside of their little experiment. In battle he would see a blow coming over her shoulder and pull her out of the trajectory. She moved like water with him, they could almost dance through skirmishes together.

Of course, blood drinking came with the territory. He would always ask before he imbibed, and she almost always said yes.

His favored position for that was her sat on his lap, facing him. Legs hooked around his hips, arms draped loosely over his shoulders.

He would slot into that cup, resting the side of his head on her shoulder while he drank. Her hands comfortable on her forearms, her head softly falling against his.

Last night, he had initiated something that had surprised her.

Sitting down across from her in her usual starting position, he had picked up her wrist and led it to his chest. Trailing her fingertips in a dragging motion down the opening of his camp shirt.

Her surprise must have shown on her face as he smiled almost sheepishly at her.

"I'm feeling indulgent tonight." He purred. Lifting her hand to cup his pec gently. "Seems like a good night for exploration."

She smiled, nodding in agreement. Giving his pec one cheeky squeeze.

He continued to lead her hands across his body, pulling her closer to get a better range of movement.

Her puppeted hands sliding up over his hips, across his ribcage, over the curve of his shoulders.

His eyes had grown dark, chest rising and falling a little more strained.

It didn't go beyond that, with him eventually settling her into another favored sleeping position. Her head on his chest, arm draped across his ribcage, one leg curled up on his hip. His hand kneading and circling little figure eights into her thigh.

This was one of her personal favorites. One of the positions where she would often find sleep first. She wondered if he initiated this one so often cause he could tell.

So when night fell, she naturally wondered where tonight would take her.

He had absolutely had one-off tries that he decided didn't work for him, never bringing her back to them again. But his direction of her had been gradually more sensual. Something that made heat settle in her pelvis.

When they settled in for the night, she was surprised when he hadn't started leading her at all. Just running his hands over her body.

This wasn't entirely new, he did have areas of her that he enjoyed touching for tactile reasons. Particularly along her waist, under her ribcage and her upper thighs. He had remarked just how soft her skin was there, and how he was very glad she wasn't ticklish.

But the touch he drug across her now was more insistent. Needful pulls of her hips, her ass. Cupping her breasts.

She didn't move without permission, but her head fell back slightly. Letting out a soft moan.

He pulled up on both of her hands, urging them to his ears. Groaning in the back of his throat when she traced and massaged into them.

His hands pulled her legs open, hooking one up around his hip as he slid forward. Angling in between them, one hand pulling her thigh for leverage as he slowly started to grind into her.

His body pushed her onto her back, fingers digging into her propped thigh. Hand leaving it, his leg sweeping it up and open against him.

He caught her mouth in a kiss, hips fluid against hers. A hardening length pressing down into her.

For the first time, she moved of her own accord. Hand leaving his ear to cup the back of his head.

She realized her transgression and was about to move back, but his hand laced over hers.

"Please," He breathed against her mouth. "Touch me more."

This was the ultimate test, giving her free reign again. Under the suffocating wave of lust, she was determined.

"Are you sure?" She whispered when she could get a breath in.

"Yes, I trust you." He murmured, moving down to her neck.

She used the touches she had learned he enjoyed, fingers trailing along his chest, cupping over the bone of his hip, dipping into the curve of the base of his spine.

He shivered all over when she would stroke these desired places. Eyes fluttering up into his lids.

When her fingers traced the v-line of his hips something snapped in him. Needing control again.

He took hold of her wrists roughly, his legs twisting into hers and encouraging her to flip onto her belly.

She went limp again and followed his unspoken command, chest against the floor of his tent.

Pinning her wrists against her lower back, he hiked her hips up high to meet him with a grunt. In one motion he pulled her dress up over her ass, bunching up at her waist. Pulling her underclothes down roughly to her knees.

She moaned into his pillow, clasping her hands together in unholy prayer.

He unhooked her fingers far enough to slip his own in, curling into her. The rustling of fabric behind her, then the feeling of his cock teasing against her entrance.

There was no more questions, no more clarification. Just his voice low and dangerous behind her.

"You will take me."

She nodded into his pillow, pushing her legs wider for him.

He pushed inside of her without mercy, her cunt stretching deliciously to accommodate him.

She mewled into his pillow, and he fisted her hair into a ponytail. Pulling her head up.

"You will sing for me."

His hips rolled into her in hard thrusts. Rocking her body forward with each strike. It was slow and animalistic. Savoring and vicious.

He pushed her legs back together with his own, her ass seated higher, her cunt tighter around him. He groaned, caging his body over hers, forcing her chest further into the bedroll.

This new angle stroked directly against her g-spot. She moaned out choppy cries with each thrust, pushing her ass up higher into him.

"Is that good, little songbird?" He smiled, biting along her shoulder blades.

"Yes," She shuddered. "Harder, please."

"Fuck," He hissed, losing his composure. Releasing her hand to grip both sides of her hips. Slamming into her ravenously.

Her eyes rolled back into her head, already starting to clench around him. Clasped hands white knuckling.

He could feel she was close, a wide smile crossing his face when he realized she was waiting for his permission.

Teasing her for a little longer, he stayed silent outside of panting with exertion. He wanted to watch her come more undone.

She was writhing in small movements under him, trying to hold back the wave that was cresting. Whimpering in her effort.

Begging was out of the question, this was his call. But she was getting to her breaking point.

As soon as it became unbearable, he spoke.

"Come. Now."

Her whole body shuddered, shoulders arching back into still clasped hands. Release ripping through her from deep in her core, forcing near agonizing pleasure in an arc up from her pelvis. Her voice was entirely out of her control, pleading whines pushing into indignant near shrieks from her throat.

Her cum coated him in a slick veil, pushing out onto his thighs. The sight of it sent him over, the clenching pulls of her cunt further demanding.

He laced his hand back into hers, gripping his fingers into her knuckles. Crying out as his body tremored. His hips sloppy, bracing his other hand on her lower back as he filled her to the brim. Her fingers pulsed reassuringly into his as he fell apart over her. His unrestrained sweet sounds making her heart sing.

He collapsed into her lower back, pushing her clasped hands above him. Pulling them apart to lace into both of his along her sides. Still nestled inside of her. Both of them laying flat on the bedroll now.

He panted hard against her, sending little waves of cool air along her side. He unhooked his fingers high enough to tap twice on her wrist. The signal that he wanted to stop their scenario.

"Do you want me to go?" She hushed, rubbing her thumb inside of his palm.

He shook his head against her lower back, not moving from their joining in the slightest.

She smiled, twisting gently underneath him. Bringing his slack body onto her.

"Come here to me." She purred, bringing his head down to her chest. Running her fingernails in arcs along his scalp, holding him around his waist.

He melted into her, body fully relaxing. Quiet tears falling onto her sternum. His arm holding her side strong against him. His grip almost fearful, as if he was anticipating someone trying to take her from him.

She only hummed softly, a slow tune she had heard in a passing tavern. Fingers leaving her love in lines through his hair.

His breath slowed, eyes fluttering shut, his long lashes tickling her chest. Body warmed and pliant, he fell under her spell. Blessedly asleep.

She smiled, continuing to stroke his curls. She would often stay awake just to hold him like this. It felt sacred, a rite that only she got to partake in. The guardian of his rest.

"Oh, my starlight..." She hushed, kissing the top of his head.

She felt his sleeping smile against her chest. The nightcall of insects her hymn, the high moon her witness. His body her holy duty.

Letting her head turn on his pillow, she allowed herself to fall with him.

~

[sun-darling]

Its been a while.

i apologize if it seemed like i am miserable, I know i promised i would move on. I even made a confident remark that this is not my first rodeo, how arrogant of me hahahaha and i think i probably did a good job of doing so for at least a month—or so i thought. It's been months since I've listened to my "On trance" playlist, I haven't even been adding the new songs i found on it because i was trying my best to avoid it. I convinced myself it's because the "Liked Songs" playlist was much more convenient—but really most of the songs there reminded me of you. (And it seemed as though the universe is pulling a prank on me, the song shuffled to J's Lullaby as i am writing this). As i was going through the playlist again, it felt like im going through a box of chocolates, and with every bite a part of you came to resurface. I had tried to not think about what you looked like, how you smelled like, how you felt like and every god damned memory we ever had because that was the only way i could help myself. But when i listened to these songs i caught the edge of your sweet scent, your annoyingly smug smile, the moles on your cheek that seems to look like the tres marias and everything that you are. I remembered promising to make you the happiest girl with the song:

I remembered our very first date at gnar.co where you smugly teased me with all the songs that you have found as if to rub your victory over finding them first, insomnia was one of them and it stuck to me as you said it reminded you of me, i felt my heart doing a tap dance then. And ever since then The Moss was a band that grew on me.

I remember holding your hand to the song:

And i made a remark on how soft and smooth your hands were and funnily, your reply was "let me guess, its an indication of someone who doesn't do chores right?" I was taken so aback because i really did just appreciate its beauty because contrary to yours, mine was veiny and has a lot of scars from getting into lot of fights back in the day.

I remember you telling me how much you wanted to learn how to ride a bike when you brought up this song:

And much to my regret i had not gotten the chance to teach you despite bragging about my oh so amazing capability to teach.

And this song was the very last you sent me,

i still remember feeling all kilig as i listen to the lyrics. You were back in your hometown aurora and you sending me this had me over cloud 9.

And of course the song:

Which became our theme song. This haunted me even in my dreams you know? Nyahahhaha.

There are a lot of songs that reminds me of you, i lie still in my bed listening to every tune with my eyes shut and as the song ends and the music fades, you were gone again.

But you'll always still be a part of me. yesterday lyanne, a classmate of mine asked me if calico cats really were all females, and i was surprised why of all people she would ask me. Apparently she heard from zion that i told him calico cats were all females and zion couldn't recall why they were all females so she came to ask me to explain why and i explained it exactly how you explained it to me—that calico cats are predominantly females because cat's coloring are related to their chromosomes and to have 3 colors you'd need 2 X chromosomes.

And I've never really thought much about classifying oranges, but you taught me that clementines are the small ones and tangerines are less sweet with tougher skins. It's become one of my random fun facts, like how I always mention the calico cat fact whenever I spot one with someone I haven't told yet.

I hate and love how much you left behind of yourself with me, you were my Alaska Young, and to quote her favorite line "how will I ever get out of this labyrinth" but you and my feelings for you is my labyrinth. And I'll be Miles Halter that is doomed to forever dread over what could've been or the "The Great Perhaps"

[devotioncrater]

idk how that WIP fmk ask game works but i’d be curious to hear ur thoughts on any ted lasso wips you have !

HELL yes tysm!! i LOVE talking abt WIPs

fuck - the story you just want to read instead of having to write it yourself

i have the outline done for a tedtrent western film AU inspired by a convo with @stevecarrington @tomlinfonda and @larkin21 !!

the fic is set in the 60s, right as the western genre is going out of style. rebecca owns a film studio (richmond studios) in hollywood, and wants to blow up its reputation to get back at rupert. so she has higgins cast ted, a high school drama teacher from kansas, to star in an upcoming western film. she then personally hires trent, an established director well-known for being a cold-hearted bitch to work with, to direct the movie. the film itself is risky, as it subverts cornerstones of the western genre. this is the film's synopsis:

Mason "Badlands" Morris (Theodore Lasso) is a lone cowboy rider hired for a job he don't normally do: escort a Miss Josephine Fairfax (Keeley Jones) from Kansas all the way to California so she can reunite with her beau Jack (Jamie Tartt). To ensure no untowardness, her uncle Ezra (Roy Kent) accompanies them, himself desperate for a change. Over the course of 14 days during the spring of 1856, the trio face unexpected challenges and uncover secrets which would best be left buried.

the fic spans from the first initial table read all the way to release day. shenanigans and unlikely romances ensue. i have everything for this SO clearly mapped in my head and on paper, but i know it's going to be a massive undertaking putting it into words. so if i could just...read it instead that'd be amazin LMAO

marry - the story you're obsessed with writing and never want to stop working on or thinking about

break me, shake me, devastate me (come here baby) is one i cannot stop writing/thinking about. the second and final chapter for it is going to be at minimum 7k words long because i keep adding more details in or reworking scenes. especially since the james lance interview dropped and we got more trent lore. the flipside to this is that i'm chewing my nails, sweating over the fact i haven't updated in 12 days. i deadass tried to update this past sunday but!! no!! it didn't feel complete yet. so hopefully this weekend it'll happen

grief and longing are my favorite themes to write about, which this fic explores. i have a playlist titled "grieving" that i made purely to listen to while writing this fic.

kill - the story you're most frustrated with and would rather just put it in the trash (or a high shelf somewhere to forget about for a long time)

i've kind of already done this, but there's a royjamie fic i'm bashing my head against the wall about. i got inspired by AURORA's songs "forgotten love" and "soft universe", specifically the lyrics:

You are the reason I can dance Within a fire of goodbyes, of goodbyes I can lie in a dark room without the feeling that I'm lonely

and

My body falls off the side of her bed And now I know what love feels like Don't let me turn into pain All of this is loveliness Chaos came, we laid our head Down on the feather cotton bed You find a heart and catch your breath Let the universe go red Speak to me, speak to me With love in your words Make for me, make for me A soft universe

basically the fic is about different times roy and jamie sleep together in the same bed. it explores their unspoken codependency and the soft intimacy they share underneath their weird dynamic. the reason i'm frustrated is that i cannot seem to find a good enough explanation for why they start sharing a bed LMAO

currently i have something inspired by the fonda/redford film Our Souls At Night, where jamie shows up at roy's door one night and is like "i can't sleep, mate. i miss having a person next to me."

we'll see though. maybe i'll find motivation for the fic again

[strapinandstraponyourstrapons]

no one asked for this, don't read all this, keep scrolling, save yourself

i was inspired by @canary44 's theo raeken coded playlist, and i really wanted to make theo a sad boi playlist of songs by my favourite artist. aurora's music is very special to me; she makes me feel a lot and has gotten me through some very tough moments in life. so i wanted to pick songs for theo that i thought sounded like echoes of his grief, or invitations to lean into his softer parts, and to not let pain tear him apart.

did i add like, half of her discography? yes but i could have added more so don't fucking try me🥰💅✨

if anyone doesn't wanna listen to the whole thing but wants the vibes, here's a breakdown.

grieving songs: Runaway, Little Boy in the Grass, Lucky, Winter Bird (he would 100% cry to it while thinking about tara, argue with the wall), Through The Eyes Of A Child, It Happened Quiet

healing songs: Conqueror, Warrior, All Is Soft Inside, Infections Of A Different Kind, The River, Daydreamer, Soft Universe, Giving In To The Love, This Could Be A Dream

"fuck you dread doctors and fuck you god" songs: Running With The Wolves, Churchyard, You Keep Me Crawling, Blood In The Wine, The Devil Is Human

"haha i'm fucked up" songs: In Boxes, Soulless Creatures, In Bottles, The Innocent

i'm also going to add some lyrics from each song that reminded me of him here bc i love her lyrics so muuuuuuuuch🖤

Runaway

and all this time i have been lyin

oh lyin in secret to myself

i've been putting sorrow on the farthest place

on my shelf, la-di-da

and i was runnin far away

would i run off the world someday?

nobody knows, nobody knows

and i was dancing in the rain i felt alive and i can't complain

but no, take me home, take me home where i belong, i got no other place to go

Running With The Wolves

there's blood on your lies

the sky's open wide

there is nowhere for you to hide

the hunter's moon is shining

i'm running with the wolves tonight

In Boxes

calling out for the lonely, i am going home

i've been doing awful things again

i hear them laughing in my head

Little Boy In The Grass

when will my healing come?

when will my healing come along?

sinking like a stone

when will my healing come along?

finally i am over it all

finally i am over it all

Conqueror

broken mornings, broken nights and broken days inbetween

open ground the sky is open, makes an open scene

Lucky

i, i don't know where i am, where i'll go

where to even begin when i know

what lies behind, makes no sense in my mind

but i know that it's time to let go

and i feel the light for the very first time

not anybody knows that i am lucky to be alive

Winter Bird

silent things

violent chase

we are dancing again in a dream by the lake

my tears are always frozen

i can see the air i breathe

got my fingers painting pictures on the glass in front of me

lay me by the frozen river where the boats have passed me by

all i need is to remember how it was to feel alive

Through The Eyes Of A Child

when a human strokes your skin

that is when you let them in

let them in before they go

i would rather feel alive with a childlike soul

with a childlike soul

Warrior

i can't recall the last time i opened my eyes to see the world as beautiful

and i built a cage to hide in

i'm hiding, i'm trying to battle the night

let love conquer your mind

warrior, warrior

just reach out for the light

warrior, warrior

All Is Soft Inside

i don't know why, but i feel down

you need to know, i can't go on

i was a rose, i was an animal

don't let me change, don't let me go

all around is stone, all is soft inside

It Happened Quiet

you fell apart

like a stone can be broken into sand

a thousand pieces

spread across a crying land

and you can't remember that day

but you know it happened quiet

so quiet

Churchyard

hate followed him gently

black seeds in his heart

roots tearing the love in him apart

he told me i belong in a churchyard

he told me i could walk away but i wouldn't get far

tell me how do people know what is hurt, what is love?

he told me i belong in a churchyard

Soft Universe

don't let me turn into pain

all of this is loveliness

chaos came, we laid our head

down on a feather cotton bed

you find a heart and catch your breath

let the universe go red

speak to me, speak to me

with love in your words

make for me, make for me

a soft universe

Infections Of A Different Kind

and i beg, i beg to be drained

from the pain i have soaked myself in

so i can stay okay

and more than okay for a while

for a while, for a while

The River

don't forget who you are even though you are hurt

you are caught in a wire and soon it will burst

you can cry

drinking your eyes

do you miss the sadness when it's gone?

and you let the river run wild

Daydreamers

i step on broken glass

and dream of soft clouds

when feelings are heavy they become

all we are

and we become

nighttime dreamers, street walkers, small talkers

when we should be

daydreamers, and moonwalkers, and dream talkers

Soulless Creatures

never knew this curious head of mine

never knew what is love if kept inside

nothing but an endless empty heart

like laying a seed within the dark

give me a piece of your heart

give me a piece of your hands as we go

In Bottles

i will kindly watch you sleep

i find out that your eyes are open

i hide all the pieces that you never would have liked

if you knew about them

so i hide my children

oh, cover your eyes, cover your eyes

hide me inside

under your spine, under your spine

Giving In To The Love

cause if i'm not loved, i guess that i am cursed

i gotta know how to beat it, beat it first

if i'll be somebody i'll never let my skin decide it for me

i never had the world so why change for it

i never had the world so why change for it

giving in to the love, giving in to the love

giving in to the love, the love, the love, the love

You Keep Me Crawling

if i keep, if i keep forgiving

maybe i'll believe that you never meant for life to hurt for me

maybe i'll recover if you set me free

but why does it make me feel like i am weak and small?

why do i keep begging like the animal?

maybe it's because i need to serve someone

so you keep me crawling on my knees

The Innocent

danger in the boy that would lose control

when everyone thought he had a heart of gold

i remember how we used to play

he'd let me win if i let him stay

left without a single trace

i don't know why he said goodbye to love

Blood In The Wine

i was given a heart before i was given a mind

a thirst for pleasure and war

a hunger we keep inside

we fell from sky with grace, and life gave us a sweeter taste

you can drink, you can feast

there's beauty in your beast

the flesh and the fruit and the blood in the wine

come on feel alive, lover

come on feel the love, like a sinner

shout it louder, shout it for the ones who can never say

i won't feel ashamed, mother

can you break the chains, of her

shout it louder, not a sinner

she's a lover

This Could Be A Dream

feeling so alive can hurt so very much

when you're losing touch

but if i touched you, would you feel it there?

could i trust love, even if i'm scared?

oh i wish i could give like i'm longing to give

oh i wish i could live like i'm longing to live

The Devil Is Human

oh do you envy how i'm free?

how the life in me is real

running barefoot through the fields

oh does it hurt how i don't look at you with fear?

do you like to watch me kneel

'cause the way it makes you feel?

and i hear you don't like it

i don't care if you don't

...if you actually indulged me and read all this i'm sorry but what is wrong with you

[luvvixu]

i'll just answer them all cuz this has been on my draft for so longggg and if you all still want to know more, just do the number 36 and drop it on the "a penny for your thought" in my profile.

1. my nickname is luwisi (and my name is louise, btw)

2. my birthday just actually passed quietly, and it's on may 27

3. my longest relationship lasted for 1 year and 6 months (this actually happened on 2021-2022)

4. my favorite book is pride and prejudice by jane austen!!

5. im insecure of my weight :((

6. i've got a huge crush on these five male, namely; joshua hong from seventeen, finn wolfhard, jaemin from nct dream, alex turner, and avan jogia

7. OKAY SO I'VE REALLY LOVE THESE FIVE FEMALE CELEBS AND THOSE ARE; cate blanchett, kang hyewon former member of iz*one, gwen apuli from bini, anne hathaway, and giselle from aespa!!

8. my dream job is being a forensic psychologist

9. probably my biggest accomplishment so far is that i entered my dream university

10. my parents actually got my name while my mother is pregnant with me and they were strolling in a cemetery, saw two names and they combined it together—they liked it sm so here i ammmm

11. let's just take the month of may since the june was just starting. my high is that the school year ends with me being on the rank 8 out of 1,043 overall in our school and my low is my birthday.

12. i really want to go to canada and see the aurora borealis

13. to de-stress, i sleep, listen to music, and watch yt

14. i really love youtube, instagram, tiktok, tears of themis, and ofc roblox

15. i would like to describe myself in one sentence is "i need more money"

16. my face card never declines

17. i'm good at academics, specifically literature and writings

18. im bad at all sports but im do good in badminton

19. I ONCE LIED ABOUT MY AGE TO PROTECT MYSELF BUT ITS REAL THIS TIME LMAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO

20. i've seen this a million times and this never fails to make me laugh, it's a fact that there's a species of fish called the "slippery dick" 💀💀💀

21. my cat knows me the best

22. my most prize possession is my cat—i just pick him on the streets and no thing or anything could replace that dude

23. my longest friendship is 12 years and we're still hanging out till this day.

24. i first feel like an adult when i prioritize the feelings and comfortability of others than mine (that was like when i was on third grade or eight years old)

25. yeahhhh, i once compete on a badminton tournament in our school and won bronze medal

26. i actually feel nothing at this moment

27. def a night owl

28. yes, i do believe in love at first sight

29. my fave lyrics atm is this verse from mind over matter by young the giant — "and when the seasons change, will you stand by me? 'cause I'm a young man built to fall."

30. for me, self-care is having a homeostasis in your body—in which i do not have lolololololololololol (BUT I DO A LOT OF SKIN CARE, HABITS, ROUTINES, AND I AM HAPPY WITH MY HOBBIES)

31. if im describing myself as a singers, then i'll be conan gray, alex turner, and clairo

32. i'm really nervous when someone text or chat me just by my name and without any context, like they would text me "louise" and i was like internally "WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO?!?!?!" yeahhhhh, so next time pls text me with context, it will really help me control my anxiety.

33. i have a lot of pet peeves and it will take me a long time to say it—i have anger issues.

34. i have a lot of things that will make me and it will take me a long time to say it—i have a soft heart.

35. im so sorry to say this but my first impression is that if they're annoying, approachable, and gay

Question Game

Are we tired of these yet?

What is your nickname?

When is your birthday?

What was your longest relationship?

What is your favorite book?

What is something you're insecure about?

5 Male celebrity crushes

5 Female celebrity crushes

What is your dream job?

What do you consider your biggest accomplishment?

What is a fact about you that nobody would believe?

What were your highs and lows for this last month?

Where is somewhere you'd like to visit?

How do you de-stress?

What are your favorite apps besides tumblr?

Describe yourself in one sentence.

What do you think makes you attractive?

What is something you're really good at?

What is something you're really bad at?

A time that you told a lie.

What's a totally random and useless fact that you know?

Who knows you the best?

What is your most prized possession?

What is your longest friendship?

When did you first feel like an adult?

Do you/ Have you played any sports?

How are you feeling right now?

Are you an early bird or a night owl?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Favorite song lyrics right now?

What does self care look like for you?

Describe yourself with 3 singers.

What makes you nervous?

What��s a pet peeve you have?

What will always make you cry?

What kind of first impression do you think you make on people?

Free Pass! (Ask any question you want that's not on the list)

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

❛ ROJO ❜

Songfic with ‘Rojo’, J Balvin.

Translation of the lyrics.

with Nestor Oceteva.

Request #1: Can you maybe do a Nestor imagine where you're Emily's cousin or half sister and you're living with Emily and Miguel temporarily. You've been flirting and teasing him and it finally comes to a head. Smut involved please?

BY ANON.

Request #2: hi hi! I have a steamy request~! (If it's not a bother, of course) Nestor + reader are at a club and they keep teasing him,, maybe you can include lines like “shit, mami, you made a mess” and “you just want the others to hear me fuck you, huh?” 😗👉🏼👈🏼 thank youuu c:

BY @glitchinqhoul.

Warnings: nsfw, smut.

Word count: about 3.6k

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: to the author, I found it on google.

Masterlist.

A quién le mientes si en tu soledad quieres verme otra vez. Por ti respondo lo que tú me das, lo que nadie sabe…

Being Emily's half—sister hasn't been easy. She was a good student, the modelic daughter, always being kind, correct and polite. You used to be like the day and the night. But you supposed that this has to be with the fact that your blood isn't the same. She's american, and you're half—mexican. Different cultures, different cities, different people… Different lifes. But that wasn't a problem to adore each other. Emily and you have been best friends since ever, and even if you're the wild side she doesn't have, you admire her temperance.

When your college in Mexico told you that you could do the MIR at Santo Padre, you both were screaming by the phone for two minutes non-stop, until you heard Miguel telling you to stay at his home. That wasn't a bad idea, keeping in mind that you also could see Nestor every day, for the next six month. That man drives you insane since you met him, and he isn't very sane either.

You're checking the hour on the clock of your car, almost reaching the border with California, checking again that your passport and your papers signed for the University are on the copilot seat. So, when you stop at the frontier, you just have to roll down the window and offer them to the agent. Once that you're actually in American territory, you speed up by the empty road a little confused from not seeing any cars. Actually, you're just tired after almost two days driving. Because yes, you could have flown to San Diego, and rented a car. But you like your old Mustang. He has been with you since seven years ago. Coming back to reality, you see through the rearview two big black SUVs coming closer until one of them places itself after you, making you a signal to stop.

Stopping by a side, you step out of your car as Emily does, both running to each other to collide in a happy hug, screaming again and almost jumping.

“Look at you, doctora!” She says laughing and holding your hands, pulling herself away some seconds, before hugging at you again. “C'mon, let Frankie drive your car, so you can rest a little in ours”.

To your surprise, Nestor isn't the one who is driving, supposing that he's in the other black car before yours. But you're sure he's as excited as you are, waiting to have five minutes alone.

Me decido por ti, te decides por mí, a la misma hora. Me dan ganas de ti, te dan ganas de mí, a la misma hora.

Miguel has organized a party with his sober friends. And you're not in the mood to partying, but the tequila helps a little. You're jumping from senators and other politicians, to lawyers and other rich men, just because your brother-in-law is proud of you. And that makes you feel good, but it's kinda boring. So, when you find a space to disappear, you do it at the speed of the light. Finding shelter in the big garage between expensive cars of different sizes and kinds. Resting your back against the classic red Porsche, you light up a smoke among your lips to take a deep drag. You appreciate all the love that Mikey feels for you, and all the help he always gives you, but you're not the kind of girl who has these kinds of parties.

Turning around for an instant, when you hear the door getting opened, to watch Nestor walking towards you. Rolling your eyes, you smirk at him.

“Ay, ya, no me digas que te pusieron en modo perrito guardián, flaco”. (C'mon, don't tell me that Miguel made you be a guard dog). You laugh shaking your head.

“Más o menos”. (More or less). He says taking you off the cig to smoke from it.

“Okay, ládrame, ándale”. (Okay, bark at me, go ahead).

“Soy más de morder”. (I'm more into biting).

“Mírale… Isn't too early to start with that game?”

“Nah”. He replies bowing to the floor to leave the cig, before placing both hands on your ankles, pulling up the long white skirt of your dress too slowly.

Your eyes are fixed on his, getting somewhat darker as his fingertips touch slightly your skin, until he's able to settle between your legs, that you have been opening for him unconsciously. Soon, his lips find your neck, twisting it enough to give him all the space possible. Your hands go to his head, uttering a soft moan when he nails his hands on your ass under the dress. This is your game. You have it since you met, and it's one of your favorite things. A tug of war to see who gives more.

“Fuck, Nestor”. You mutter biting your lower lip, at the same time his teeth catch your skin, putting himself somewhat closer.

Te quiero sentir aquí. Me dan ganas de ti, te dan ganas de mí, a la misma hora.

“Hey, teens in heat, we're going to serve the coctel!” You can hear Emily's laughs from the other side of the door, making you feel your cheeks burning.

“We're going!” You reply a little loud, with Nestor chuckling against your neck.

Pulling him away to put on your dress well, you arrange your mane behind your shoulders before starting to walk back to the house. But when you're about to open the door, he grabs your wrist to make you turn around. Crashing your mouth with his, the man kisses you trying to hide how much he has missed you after five month without seeing each other. Even so, it becomes softer, slow, as if you have all the time you need. His arms surrounding your waist, and yours the back of his head. You're sure that he has never kissed you like that, but it feels too good. Nestor's touch has been ever so warm that could melt the coldest heart, actually, more or less like yours.

Tres y cuatro de la mañana, ven, mata estas ganas. Vamos a llegarle a mi cama, que todo lo he ignorado por ti, todo ha sido por ti. Mi cuerpo sin saber te llama.

You like to eat. You enjoy eating, and that coctel wasn't enough for you. So, waiting by reading some emails until the family is already sleeping, you step out of your new room silent like a cat. Going downstairs, you walk towards the kitchen to assault the freezer.

“Bendito Miguel”.

You whisper finding all the chocolate ice cream he has bought for you. Grabbing one of the tubs and a big spoon, you sit at the island in the center of the kitchen, with the lights off. And you were so concentrated on your task, that you didn't hear Nestor coming. Not even noticing his presence until he nails a second spoon into the tub.

“Shit! Nestor! Fuck… You're gonna fucking kill me one of these days”. You mutter, placing both hands on your chest, with the covered inside your mouth.

The man chuckles almost in silence, having some ice cream.

“Seriously, you need to stop of being this fucking silent”.

“Yeah, I know you like me being loud”.

Raising your eyebrows, you finally shake your head before such an occurrence.

“What about the kiss?”

“What kiss?” He asks a little confused. “Oh! Ya. What happens with that? It was just a kiss?”

“Yes, for sure”.

“I was just happy for you being here. We're friends, it's been five month since we met last time”.

Right in the friend-with-benefits zone, while you were thinking that finally he was catching the same feelings you have for him.

“Cool”.

“Cool?”

“What?”

“It sounded as if I just stabbed you”.

“Why would my friend like to stab me?”

Y estas no son horas de llamar, pero es que el deseo siempre puede más. Podemos pelearnos y hasta alejarnos, pero cuando llega la hora.

You didn't know that Miguel was a friend of the director of the hospital you're going to work at. And he settled a dinner to meet him. Another boring one, and you start to think that your brother-in-law wants to kill you and doesn't know how to do it. You love your work and what you do, but the work stays in the hospital, and you were too distracted about Nestor's words last night. You have been avoiding him the whole day, not even looking at him in the dinner, placed some meters away from the table studying the perimeter. And you know that he's getting more nervous as the hours pass by.

After finishing the meeting, you finally can breathe again inside the big car, checking some messages from your father asking how everything is going. You better don't reply. Keeping it inside your small bag, before leaning towards the front seat with both arms on them.

“Hey, Cartel daddy”.

Your sister breaks into laughs because of the sophisticated name, while Miguel turns at you frowning.

“Listen. Why don't I pull out the stick inside your ass and we go to a real party, ah? There's a new club some minutes ago from Santo Padre, and looks cool”.

“Did you ca—”.

“Hey, Pocahontas, that's the address”. You say to Nestor, offering him your phone to grab it.

Emily is drowning with her own laughs by your side, making you laugh too, when she remembers that you're not allowed to drink red wine because of this. You have the mania of giving funny names to everybody around you.

“What? Cartel daddy and Pocahontas. Sounds like a bad netflix tv-show I would watch”.

Tratan y se caen de la mata, quieren comprarte siempre con plata, pero ese tesoro tiene pirata. Me voy a toda por ti.

While the men prefer a reserved, watching the whole dancefloor from there, and talking about business and appointments, Emily and you enjoy a bunch of mimosas among the crowd jumping and having fun. You really needed it. And you're aware that she already knows that something is happening between the head security and you. Something bad. She doesn't have to be the most intelligent person of the world.

“I would tell him what I feel!” Your sister says, trying to make you hear her above the noise.

“He kicked my ass to the friend zone last night!” The blonde wrinkles her nose confused, seeing you nodding and drinking by your straw.

“Are you kidding me?! He was super excited to see you again! Like super excited!”

“Yeah! He kissed me! But he kissed me like Miguel kisses you! Then he told me it was just a kiss!”

“He's in love with you!”

“No, sista! He's only in love with your husband and with himself!”

“Tell him you don't want to be just his friend!”

“Me?! Oh, no, darling! I'm not gonna humiliate myself like that!”

“C'mon! You fucking pendejos!” She pouts at you.

“You just want Nestor to have a girlfriend, so you can spend more time with your husband! Bitch, I know you better than anyone!”

“I want my little sister to be happy!”

“You want your Cartel daddy!” Breaking into laughs, you place an arm on her shoulders to come back to the reserved.

“What's so funny?” Miguel asks pouring some champagne on two glasses.

“Your wife wants to settle me on a blind date”.

Me decido por ti, te decides por mí, a la misma hora. Me dan ganas de ti, te dan ganas de mí, a la misma hora.

“I'm not going to let you go on a blind date”.

You were refreshing your nape and wrists with water, when you heard him coming closer after locking the bathroom door of the reserved Miguel rented. Looking at him through the mirror, you give him your back to grab some paper and dry your hands. Throwing it into the bin, you turn around to face him.

“Why?”

“It's dangerous”. He just says, tangling his hands on a fist under his abdomen.

“You stabbed me last night, and I survived. I'm pretty sure I will survive to a blind date”. Good point, taking the advantage to pass him away.

But he stops you with an arm surrounding your waist. His chest meeting your back, while his free hand wraps your throat. You're feeling the characteristic heat that Nestor produces in you being so close, running up your legs to your low belly. His thumb caresses your skin, over the jugular vein, leaning towards you to kiss the line of your jaw. Biting your bottom lip, wrapping his wrists letting the free hand goes down by your stomach with a clear destiny.

“We are made for each other”. Nestor mumbles into your ear with a horse tone of voice.

“Yes, to be friends”. You tease him, grabbing his wrist to make him stop, wanting to hear the reality coming from his mouth.

“To be together”. He corrects you then, without a single doubt hitting his vocal chords and turning you under his hands.

Crashing his lips on yours, he makes you walk backwards until your body finds the cold wall. He's as eager as you are, lifting up a leg to surround his waist, while his hand toures your skin until being able to squeeze your ass with a warm growl dying inside his throat.

“I want you in all the ways possible, (Y/N)”. He mutters, trying to hide the anger he feels imagining you with another man. “I want you with me. Only with me”.

Pulling him to the black and golden velvet armchair, you watch him undoing his belt and his pants zipper, noticing the rock under his clothes. Seeing him rolling them down his legs to his ankles, while you take off your dress to leave it over the sink, to sit over his lap with his body between your legs. You haven't taken off the white lace panties, because you know how much he likes the friction of them in every move he does, on a side of his sensible skin. While one of his big hands massage your breast with some strength, the ringed one strokes his needed cock, lying back on the couch.

“Do you wanna fuck me?” You whisper into his mouth, unbuttoning his shirt to stroke his bare chest.

“You don' know how much I need your pussy, cariño”. He just says, looking at you with parted lips grabbing his erection between your fingers.

“I don't think that's enough”. Teasing him, you guide his throbbing and warmth glans to your folds, pressing it against your wet clit and swinging softly your hips.

“I've been waiting five months for you jumping over my cock, mami. You know I am fucking desperate for your soaked pussy suffocating me and pushing me into the limit”. Nestor almost begs, placing his hands on both sides of your waist. “Ride your cock, baby. Look at how hard it's because of you. It fucking painful”.

“And what if I punish you about what you said last night… putting my clothes on again and leaving you there alone, ah?”

“Don't do that shit, (Y/N). I fucking implore you”. He quickly complains pecking your lips with short kisses. “You're already fucking killing me”.

Leading a little back his hardness between your legs, you dig it into you slowly, feeling every inch of his erection pressing your tight walls. He's thicker than you can remember, having passed too much time since the last time, needing some seconds to mold your body to his. A soft moan escapes from your mouths when his glans pushes your g-spot, urging you to spread more your legs forcing you to feel him completely. And you can't describe that sensation.

“Tell me you didn't miss my cock…” He chuckles, erasing that fancy smile from his lips by swinging your hips just one time.

His growl echoes throughout the bathroom, before catching your lips between his to bite them, making you dance on top of him. The pleasure is immeasurable, bouncing over his hard rock once and again. Once and again, arching your back under his arms, while his mouth now devours the skin of your neck, wetting it with his saliva and marking every inch with his teeth. The pace becomes rough and faster, slapping your ass with both hands to squeeze your buttocks so needed that you're desiring to feel his cum filling you up. But you like his cock pounding you.

“I'm going to make the others hear you being fucked by me, mi amor…” He bellows, making you beg when pulling out himself from you to get up.

Guiding you quickly to the sink and giving him your back, placing a hand on your nape, he makes you lean over the sink before putting aside your panties to thrust his soaked cock back to your pussy. The scream you utter when his pelvis hits you so rough, isn't normal. Being sure that your sister and Miguel already heard you. His hands nailed on your hips make each lunge deeper, watching him through the mirror the pleased look on his face, while his gaze is fixed in your. He enjoys seeing you bite your bottom lip and closing your eyes, every time he slaps you with his ringed fingers, knowing that this pleasure it's going to fuck you up tomorrow. But you love the way he has to uninhibit himself, after being the whole day following orders.

“Shit, baby… I want you all my fucking life”. He gasps leaning his head back with closed eyelids, impaling you against the marble counter of the sink.

Maybe you should have taken off the heels to not lose the balance, but you didn't think about it, and now you're fighting against your shaky legs.

“Look how good you take it all… my fucking god, (Y/N). You're fucking drenching me”.

Yes, you can feel it. You can feel your juices and his slipping down your thighs, producing a soaked dirty sound every time his body collides with yours so hard. Urging you to incorporate your chest from the sink with a hand grabbing your throat and the other arm surrounding your waist, Nestor arches your back, placing his face on your shoulder.

“Drown my fucking… dick with your cum, mi amor…” He begs you, biting your love, without removing his darkened orbs from yours, through your reflections.

“Shit, Nestor…” You're not sure when you start to cry because of the pleasure, needing more, needing to reach the orgasm. “Fuck me harder, I fucking beg you… Por favor”.

You can't barely breathe when his finger finds your clit, stroking it with the same pace he's embedding you against the furnishing. Your moans dance all around the bathroom, while he's gasping over your ear how much he wants to fuck you for the rest of his life, everywhere, at anytime you want it. And by crying out his name and clinging to him, a lash of heat evolves you, making your pussy twitch uncontrollably as the tears fall down your cheek. Your palpitating walls clenching his cock, making his vocals get louder as long as he continues diving his warmth hardness into you, closer from his own ecstasy.

You don't need to tell him that you want him to cum inside you, mixing it with yours, because he already has other plans. Pulling himself out and jerking off his dick, he spills his seed over your wet panties, bathing them on it as his throat collapses because of the pleasure. But don't waste time putting them to the side again to pound you again, pressing his body against yours as much as he can, holding your anatomy into his arms.

Te quiero sentir aquí. Me dan ganas de ti, te dan ganas de mí, a la misma hora.

It's four am and you can't sleep thinking about what he said to you. Sighing, you sit up on your bed, curling your knees against your chest and surrounding them with both arms. He already told you that he wants you, but was he talking or his jealousy? You're doubting about going to his house, or texting him, or doing anything. Grabbing your phone from the nightstand and a cig from the packet, you step out of your dorm to walk downstairs towards the terrace. Sitting on one of the sofas outside, you light the smoke to have a drag, unlocking your phone. Your trembling fingers touch the screen over the keyboard; writing and deleting, writing and deleting. But you're unable to send any message. Feeling stupid, you finally write him that you can't sleep, listening the ding of your own notification so close that makes you frown confused.

“Me neither”.

With your lips pursed and a leg curled over the sofa, you turn ashamed towards him. Nestor is wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a white big shirt. You're sure that you have never seen him before without wearing a suit. And you are falling loudly for him much more than ever. Putting out the cigarette, you stand up on your feet to lead them towards you.

“Stay with me, at least tonight”. You mutter, tangling your fingers with his.

“But move with me tomorrow”. Nestor asks you then, before hugging you as close as he can.

“Deal”. You reply, placing your chin on his chest to look at him, receiving some short kisses all around your face that make you laugh.

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[aurora-daily]

Hi guys! What are your personal interpretations on the song "Soft Universe"? I've had these other questions in mind for a long time now too: is it true that "Churchyard", "It happened Quiet" (and maybe "Murder Song") share the same story, as well as "In Bottles" and "In Boxes"? what has Aurora said about them?

To me, «Soft Universe» is about becoming oblivious to the things that surround you when you escape to another person. The perspective Aurora is talking from in the lyrics is a person who knows the struggles in a world full of pain, which has been a staple of her ever since she started to write songs. «There’s ice in my water / And when I drink it cuts my tongue / There’s glass on the playground / It cuts my skin when I run» - This seems to point out towards the existence of hardships on a daily basis through some extreme imagery. The indefinite person of this song feels pain through little aspects of life, but then finds shelter in that beloved one that seems to take them by storm («And from the dark, into the light I saw a stone burst into life / Then in the corner of your eye I saw a dream that never died»). A «stone bursting into life» could be a metaphor about everybody around being tough, but not once you have made bonds with them. The second verse reinforces this idea. The couple in question fall in love and adapt themselves to a world where «loveliness» dominate their lives: «My body falls off the side of her bed and now I know what love feels like / Don’t let me turn into pain / All of this is loveliness.�� It goes on to suggest a selfish side of the two lovers anytime bad things come back to them: «Chaos came / We laid our head down on a feather cotton bed» suggests that they are too comfortable in the world they have escaped to, which is being represented by the comfort brought by someone else´s body in a shared bed. «We find a heart that catch your breath / Let the universe go red» imply that they don’t care about what happens to the world and the rest of people in it when they are in love. Another way to put it would be «let it be filled with violence,» but red is also representative of passion, which adds the idea of something carnal going in between. The color red is also a leitmotiv on the album Infections of a Different Kind; it’s mentioned in «It Happened Quiet» with the same violent connotation and is also a predominant element in the photo that illustrates the album cover, contrasting with words like «quiet» and «soft» in song titles.«Soft Universe» in itself englobes such elements. Simply put, for me it is an insight into the natural way of relationships (the wholesomeness of them and, in some cases, the selfishness of us). They can be overwhelming at the beginning, change our way of seeing the world and become a perfect escape for things we would rather avoid, but you can’t truly escape from pain, and that’s something to learn to deal with. If anything, love is a tool to cope with it, the total opposite.

All I know so far about «It Happened Quiet» is that it could be linked to «Churchyard» when it comes to the situation they describe. This is what Aurora said in 2018 during a Q&A on Reddit:

-  Andrés

______________________________________________________________

Hello, lovely warrior! First of all, I would like to apologise for this answer taking this much time for answering for some reasons, hope, you will see our answers and, maybe, communicate back with the points you find in common or would like to discuss with us :) And thank you for you questions!

That would be pretty much repetitive in a way with answering what “Soft Universe” means for me after a great answer by Andrés but still.

For me “Soft Universe” is a song about love in general and gentleness and kindness for your significant other winning over the danger of everyday life. As it was noted, the lyrics are built up around the contrast of possible danger and difficulties in usual life’s routine (ice in my water, glass on the playground) and the crave for love and intimacy (let the universe go red (Aurora said herself in this above mentioned Reddit Q&A that red in a song denotes love, so, basically, “let the universe be filled with love”), make for me a soft universe). There’s always a need of love and an escape place in it during the times where chaos came, and, in my opinion, that’s not selfish at all to look for escape place in this kind of, like Aurora sings in a song, loveliness because otherwise there’s not much of a coping mechanism to go through very harsh times. Also I really love the line “Speak to me with love in your words” which, in my opinion, encapsulates the idea that good communication with understanding and gentleness can be very important to the loved person and that love is not only expressed verbally but it hides in-between the words, intonation and the warmth of the voice which highlights the feeling to the other person more and ignites heart with more love!

As for the link between  “Churchyard” and “It happened Quiet” + “Murder Song (5,4,3,2,1)” + “In Bottles” and “In Boxes”… Well, what we know so far about some of these songs from Aurora herself:

“It’s quite empowering. Many of the songs are about people taking choices on behalf of themselves, about coming back for revenge. In my more delusional stories like ‘It Happened Quiet’ and ‘Churchyard’, the victim comes back to haunt the one that hurt them. It’s about the process in becoming a warrior, a true warrior for the world – but you have to work on your own stuff first” – NME interview [x]

“Churchyard” was meant to be on the first album, and “It Happened Quiet” has a very devastating love story (The Current studio interview [link])

“’It Happened Quiet’ Is actually a part of a big story which you will understand in the future. But it was inspired by a very complicated relationship, if you can call it like that. It is quite sad. But the world is sad sometimes…” - AURORA in her Q&A on twitter back in December 2018 [link]

“I’m really into the concept of being a “voice for the voiceless” because that is such an important thing to do. And also I hope to send ideas to people who might find themselves in abusive relationships without even knowing it. Lots of people out there choose not to leave situations where they are treated badly. It happens at home, at work, at school in politics and the music industry.” – AURORA on “Churchyard” and “It Happened Quiet” for  Parvati magazine interview [link]

- Nikol

[funky-birb]

So I was tagged by @fleurdemalheur  you will now learn that song asks are my nightmare lmao <3 But ily thank you for this, it actually put me in a really good mood! I’m going to have to check Phoebe Bridgers then ;)

TBH if you don’t know what to do check these out, lots of different things, you might like some <3

Your favourite album: Ok, brace yourselves, I can’t for the life of me pick things, here’s a list : 

Louise Attaque (Louise Attaque) 

Selah sue (Selah Sue)

Asa (Asha)

Joyful (Ayo)

Je dis aime (M)

Divinydille (Vanessa Paradis)

Psychostar world (Kamini)

Welcome to jamrock (Damian Marley)

Can you tell I’ve been listening to the same things for like... an eternity yet?

Your favourite song at the moment: So i’ve been listening to those a lot :

Zenit (Onuka)

Ilomilo (Billie Eilish)

Revenge (Joyner Lucas)

Venom (Little simz)

Final Form (Sampa the great)

QUEEN (Janelle Monae)

Can you feel my heart (Bring me the horizon) -> I’m emo sometimes.

囂張 (盧凱彤)

Pretty face (Soley)

我的新衣/My New Swag (Vava)

If I die tonight (KOHH)

貧乏なんて気にしない (KOHH)

Gonna need a grave (Urban Country)

Run for a long time (Blue Saraceno)

Hunnu Guren (Batzorig Vaanchig) -> I like throat singing.

Fee Ra Huri (Omnia)

Needed me (Rihanna)

Gett off (Prince) -> Y’all thought I wouldn’t put my main star on there? Y’all thought wrong.

Special (Ashnikko) -> First bc i thought it was stupid but now i’m a clown.

Trop Beau (Lomepal)

Եթե Կարող Ես (Սրբուկ) -> Am I droping armenian pop everywhere? Maybe. 

Na na na (Սրբուկ)

Թամզարա (Սրբուկ) -> Can you guys tell i’ve been listening to Srbuk?

Bâtard Sensible (TTC) -> Idk what to tell you guys.

Grita (Jarabe de Pablo)

Snow (Hey oh) (RHCP)

Love is a bitch (Two feet)

Would that I (Hozier)

I’m just dropping a weirdass playlist alright? I just checked my history. 

An album that’s important to you:  Ok maybe I lied, I can pick one :

Diamonds on the inside (Ben Harper) 

Songs that are important to you: Well here goes nothing :

Amen Omen (Ben Harper)

Soft Universe (Aurora) 

Down on my knees (Ayo) -> Reminds me of my mom

Jailer (Asa)

1-800-273-8255 (Logic)

素晴らしき日常 ( 高橋優 ) -> かずちゃんありがとう <3

Phoenix (K.A.A.N)

Body (Mother mother)

Arrache moi (Louise Attaque) 

Bleed it out (Linkin park)

Pain (Hollywood Undead)

Do it or die (Die mannequin)

Probably a lot of other songs but my mind is blank i had to go check my phone.I can’t remember shit lmao

What makes you like a song: The stronger the emotions i feel are when listening to it, the more i’ll like it I guess? I like those that make me want to just dance and go crazy alone at 3am, funky ones, i like those that are calm, just intrumental and those that are dramatic and make me feel sad too. I don’t really know. 

Your favourite instrument to hear in a song: Violins I think? Or old/traditionnal ones, like kamancha, duduk, zithers, morin khuur, bagpipes too i guess? I just really like hearing things... I like accordion too, and piano...LOOK, I DON’T KNOW

A song from my childhood: You know what? I’m just going to list artists, because my parents just left music on like all the time, I always have to ask because I don’t even remember most of the artists :

Cesaria Evora 

Tracy Chapman 

Prince 

Ben Harper 

Lhasa de Sela

Buju Banton

Capleton

Bob and Damian Marley

M

Lauryn Hill

Amy Winehouse

Nujabes

Tété

A song to dance to: So we’ve established that i can’t pick songs. I don’t even know most of the artists and you know what, screw it. Here’s a list :

When it’s like 3am and I decide to get drunk and dance :

Get down on saturday night (Oliver Cheatham)

And the beat goes on (The whispers)

Let’s groove (Earth, wind & fire)

Act Like you know (Fat Larry’s band)

Video killed the radio star (The buggles)

Boogie wonderland (Earth, wind & fire)

Toxic (Britney Spears)

Voulez vous (ABBA)

Edge of seventeen (Stevie Nicks)

Move your feet (Junior Senior)

I want to break free (QUEEN)

Sexy Dancer  (Prince)

Zyn zyn (Zhonti)

When I just ??? (Horny power trip probably drunk too songs??) :

Gasolina (You know :))))))

Who dem (Capleton)

That bih (Qveen Herby)

Lick it (She & go_des)

Box (Siya)

Ba na na (A tribe called red)

Raingurl (Yaeji)

Murder she wrote (Chaka Demus & pliers)

Sentient (Perturbator)

Deep throat (Cupcakke)

And lots of mix i can’t name ?

A song you love lyrically: Guess what? You’re getting a list boo :

Chevalier (Kamini)

Emma Stanton (Tété)

Ton Absence (Tété)

Onde Sensuelle (M)

Nuit Blanche (Renan Luce)

Le déni (Kamini)

Ovni (Kamini)

Schizophrène (Kamini) -> Donc j’aime bien kamini, ça va?

Warrior (Aurora)

I’ll tag :  @maman-ours @prayfordream @vvrathb @scavengerridley @queen-of-edolas @rookieofthedecade @milliondollarboobtoucher 

[selvnite]

song rec list

*struggles to gather my spotify library in my arms*

Thank you so SO much to @eledhrim for tagging me! I am desperate for any chance to share my eclectic music taste! I spend a lot of time on Spotify (83,249 minutes this year...) and I’ve probably only discovered some of these artists this year but idk. it all kinda. blends together lol. i make and revise playlists often so a lot of the songs will be from oc or ship playlists (shameless plug for my oc playlists lmao)

tagging: @caiwyns @weisshavpt (who have already been tagged), @aloyssobek @thebotjock @arasaka-s & any other mutuals who wanna share their rad tunes. just tag me! 

track list (with some commentary):

Give You The World -  フローラ (Vo. Jessica Karpov) ↳ honesty this song just slaps but the lyrics “ Can't you see I would do Oh, everything for you? I'd steal you the moon, and the sun, and the stars, every one” I’m shaking. I belt this song out everytime it comes on it is EMBARRASSING

Take Control - Old Gods of Asgard ↳ *gets whiplash from the genre change* this is in Control, you know, that one bit that makes you feel cool af? I just... like some rock

Borderline - Tame Impala

Unbreakable -  クリスタル (Vo. Lauren Dyson) ↳ aka Mars Beyoncé. Another song from Carole & Tuesday (which I urge you to watch!) and honestly? a bop

Half The World Away - AURORA ↳ I know this was for a Christmas ad and it’s a cover but I prefer this version... its v soft. gentle. (freya’s playlist)

Love Poem - IU ↳ speaking of soft... I cried on my first listen, listened again with the lyric translation and... wow. It’s especially poignant after the events the past few months and hits a soft spot

PIRI - Dreamcatcher ↳ yes... it’s kpop... BUT with rock. I found them this year and wish I’d known of them sooner. They are also crackheads lmaooo

Mamamoo - Universe ↳ Last kpop one I SWEAR. Tbh they released so much just this year it’s hard to pick one but I picked this off their most recent release. It’s cute

Landscape - Demo - Florence + the Machine ↳ what is there to say? It’s gorgeous (nimthiriel’s playlist)

Evergreen - Broods ↳ (also freya’s playlist)

Dread In My Heart - Mother Mother

Yes I’m Changing - Tame Impala ↳ it’s like a stream-of-consciousness from my own brain

i wouldn’t mind dying with you - longlost

↳ depression pop + lock it lmao

I’m gonna leave at this because it’s already so long.

[edmundodiaz]

so, i was tagged by @lookwhatustarted, @nimartino and @panecunzato (thank you so much and sorry for keeping you waiting 💛)

p.s. technically they were two different tag games(?) with almost the same questions, so i merged them into one

Rules: answer questions and tag people you want to get to know better.

Nickname: fe, fede Zodiac: aquarius (i was born on the 24th of january) Height: 170 cm Last movie I saw: at eternity's gate Last thing I googled: the lyrics from les baisers perdus by mika Favourite musician(s): mika, ed sheeran, coldplay, harry styles Song stuck in my head: soft universe by aurora (thanks to giulia and her edit) Other blog(s): none Do I get asks: lately i’ve been getting more than usual Blogs following: 334 Amount of sleep: 6-8 hours Lucky number: 7 What I’m wearing: my unicorn onesie Dream job: data analyst Favourite song: se piovesse il tuo nome - elisa e calcutta Dream trip(s): japan Describe yourself as aesthetic things: unread books, tea, blankets Random fact about me: i kinda have an obsession for sisi Favourite food: pizza Play any instruments: when i say i have no talents, i mean it.

[karkkidoeswriting]

10 Songs Tag

This has been way too long in my drafts :’D (and it’s not even the only tag game with same fate), but after doing to OC songs tag game I remembered this and decided to finish this too, because I had a lot of song left to mention! So thank you for tagging me and sorry, @lady-redshield-writes. (Your songs were awesome btw.)

So here are the songs that remind me of The Bear Castle in no particular order:

Beethoven - Moonlight Sonata: This perfectly sets up the overall tone I’m trying to capture. Somewhat melancholic, but soft and beautiful. Also I could imagine Valeri playing this :D

Mokoma - Sydänjuuret (Roots of Hearth): This one has pretty opposite tone from Moonlight Sonata, but though the overall tone is melancholic and bittersweet many of the MCs has a lot of unresolved rage, so the coarse vocals and heavy sounds fit perfectly. Also this song is about heritage and belonging and they are one of the main themes in The Bear Castle. (I couldn’t find English lyrics, sorry.)

Nightwish - Our Decades in the Sun: This is very beautiful love letter to parents and for The Bear Castle characters, who are still trying to cope with the loss of their parents, it’s very important topic.

CMX - Sivu paholaisen päiväkirjasta (A Page from Devil’s Diary): I love the metallic sound in this song and it has the same industrialization feel I want to have in The Bear Castle too. CMX’s lyrics are always pretty cryptic but these reminds me of thoughts of an army commander. I want to show the war that is waged outside the battlefield, while also there will be battles, but most part of the war is not fought on battlefields and I think this song captures the feeling of that part of war. (English lyrics)

Hans Zimmer - Aurora: I feel like the tragedy in this song is very silent and personal, nothing dramatic or grand. Even though there is a continental war stirring up, The Bear Castle focuses on the personal conflicts and losses of the characters, not in the greater effects.

Arren’s way from Tales of the Earthsea: This reminds me a lot about Cabalusia. While listening to this I can imagine Cabalusia’s rough beauty.

Price of Freedom from FFVII Crisis Core: This is such a pretty song and has so bittersweet feeling (anyone played Crisis Core and cried at the end battle while this was playing?). I love bittersweet stories so it’s not a surprise when I want The Bear Castle leave (a possible) reader with that feeling.

CMX - Kuoleman risteyksesta kolme virstaa pohjoiseen (Three versts to North from the crossing of death): Again CMX being cryptic with their lyrics. For me this song tells about death and especially both fear and longing for death. Death is pretty important theme too. (English lyrics)

The Life and Times of Scrooge - Dreamtime: This has very mystic feel and it reminds me especially of Dir’ahin. I’m actually thinking that they could have a traditional wind instrument which would be something like didgeridoo.

Chevaliers de Sangreal from The Da Vinci Code: I love how Zimmer has combined soft violin and electrical cello. There is old and new, which captures very well The Bear Castle’s world.

Tagging @teacup-universes, @pigeonbooks and @andtheotherwriter!

[luuurien]

Claire Dickson - Starland

(Ambient Pop, Drone, Indietronica)

Claire Dickson's soft, spacious debut album puts her soul at the center of things; it's ambient music with a particularly human touch. Starland's less than half an hour spent across seven tactile, psychedelic sprawls, but rarely is Dickson unable to sweep you up in her breathtaking world.

☆☆☆☆

Starland was recorded partly on a boat in the Arctic Circle, and partly in the Brooklyn apartment where Claire Dickson lives. It's unimaginable how far apart these places are from one another, almost like two entirely different universes. But that's where Claire Dickson is most comfortable, this liminal-feeling spot in between existences that makes up the emotional bulk of her magnificent debut album Starland. Her voice sometimes exists as a lyrical vessel or to simmer on top of droning synths, sometimes she'll opt for acoustic instrumentation on Snowglobe and relegate the electronics to the backburner for a time.  Starland's minimal nature doesn't hide much from you, but everything here is so well done that you'd never wish to miss a second of it. Comparisons to Grouper are almost impossible to avoid with an album like Starland: they both share that misty, slightly-inscrutable presence on their tracks and a chilly, fully body-high compositional style. Golden Summer's array of vocal tracks coagulated around twinkling, bright drones recalls the sound of something like Alien Observer that I can easily imagine the song being an outtake from that album. Sea Change's tense implied rhythms around Dickson's sweeping melodies mirror the dichotomy between love and death explored throughout the song ("She takes my hand, and out of time we’re above the city / I step off a building and fly / Reckless and calm our flesh is earth and silver"). The title track eschews songwriting entirely, Dickson's emotions expressed through trickling electronics and hums so close to the microphone you can practically feel her breath through the recording. I Need More hits this strange, baroque/ambient crossroads with its unresolved chord progressions and angelic choral harmonies, the one instance in Starland where Dickson threatens to let it all come crashing down from the sky. The best thing about Starland is that it never feels like Dickson is using these ambient sounds to mask a lack of musical muscle, something that happens all too commonly with the genre now. Bringing Grey Mcmurray on for a rich, contemplative guitar solo on Arctic, Dickson structures the ebbs and flows of the track to always have something going on; woozy and playful synths begin to chirp two and a half minutes in after the sunlight passes over Mcmurray's passage in the first half of the song. Sea Change throws in an ambient techno groove split in half by the sea, a shuffling hi-hat shuffle and rhythm created by delay-kissed synths that renders hypnotizing here but could easily soundtrack a high-tech dance floor if you threw it into boiling water. Dickson lets her voice be completely bare on Golden Summer, far away from the rippling waters her voice was dropped into on previous tracks. It's a reminder of the soul behind this celestial album, something often forgotten about in the heavy stupor of ambient music. Claire Dickson's music is so delicate that it would crumble from the pressure of a single finger being pressed down on it. So, she keeps her music isolated in chilly, aurora winter skies where nobody can touch them. You stare up at Starland from far below, only seeing a new angle when the light hits it just right. For those who have the patience, sitting and watching it float for hours in the air just to see every possible color it can reflect is unparalleled. But you can also come to Starland once, lose yourself in its beauty, and be content with everything you saw in that short flash of time. It's a bit odd to call an ambient album "exciting," but for a debut with as much character and depth as Starland, Claire Dickson has quickly become one of the new names to pay attention to for the future. She's a master of letting you in on everything in her music, and yet it never feels like you could entirely understand it until you've spent a lifetime with these songs next to you.

[julianschesthair]

Our Song Challenge

(( Sooooooooo I saw this post by @astraconcordia​ and being the playlist sucker I am of course I had to participate. ))

Rules:

Make your muse a playlist for their relationships with the game’s romanceable characters. Or relationships with other fan apprentices. Or just ships. As long as its a relationship.

One song per relationship, lyric or instrumental; popular or obscure. Whatever you want. The nature of the relationship doesn’t have to be romantic. 

(Playlist under the cut cause it got a bit long)

Morpheus Our Song Challege Playlist:

Canon romanceable characters:

Julian: 

Garden | Halsey

“And you think my bruised knees are sort of pretty And I think your tired eyes are kind of nice”

Nadia:

You Don’t Own Me | Lesley Gore

“I don't tell you what to say, I don't tell you what to do So just let me be myself that's all I ask of you”

Asra:

Little Talks | Of Monsters and Men

“Some days I don't know if I am wrong or right Your mind is playing tricks on you my dear” 

Fan Apprentices:

Attie ( @thetiredapprentice ) : 

From This Valley | The Civil Wars

“Oh the outcast dreams of acceptance Just to find pure love's embrace”

Dillion ( @thetiredapprentice ) :

for him. | Troye Sivan

“Forget all the shooting stars and all the silver moons We've been making shades of purple out of red and blue”

Gwen ( @two-ofcups ) :

Soft Universe | AURORA

“Speak to me, speak to me, with love in your words Make for me, make for me, a soft universe.”

Isa ( @strangerfortunes ) :

Rock, paper, scissors | Katzenjammer

“So take a little trip down the road and see What you gonna find, who you want to be”

Samael ( @samael-bellamorte ) :

Moonlight Kissed | Poets of the Fall

“And I hear voices take flight and send out our wish Of peaceful dreams on a night moonlight kissed.”

[pristinaaa-blog]

A Best of 2018 Albums List that Doesn't Have Any Kids See Ghosts or Daughters on it

Occult avant-garde black metal, awesome Latin dance-pop from Brazil, strong female singer-songwriters who want to save the world. Basically this was music in 2018 for me, a series of albums with breathtaking power and exciting new ideas.

AURORA Infections of a Different Kind (Step I) I have to say that this list is not supposed to be a ranking as it’s simply too difficult to decide which album I liked best. Still, if someone came up to me with a gun in one hand and a puppy in the other, telling me to choose or “the puppy gets it”, I think AURORA’s Infections of a Different Kind (Step 1) would be my choice. It is the most outstanding and the most innovative thing I heard in a long time, carrying an elemental power that hits you hard and makes you dizzy.

Every single note on this record sounds as if everything in the universe was finding its right place. Every harmony and every little thing is perfect, this album gives you a cathartic experience - suddenly everything becomes clear and bright, all the pieces of the cosmos back where they belong. I don’t believe in fate but I have a feeling that this record it was destined to be created somehow. It is insanely powerful and mesmerizing, and it’s nothing I’ve ever heard before.

Aurora really feels like a queen on this album, she has so much love that is enough to embrace the whole world. Using all this love, she takes up the role of the leader who tries to guide people towards a positive future, a role that is the hardest and the most unthankful. Each and every song on this record makes me feel stronger, because they carry the message that it’s all worth it. And well, if such things like this album exist in this world then I guess I have no doubts about that message being true.

Highlights for me are All is Soft Inside, Forgotten Love, and Soft Universe. But the whole thing is amazing. 

Zeal and Ardor Stranger Fruit I used to listen to all these awesome avant-garde bands in the 00’s that sounded like nothing I’d ever heard before. Then they all disbanded and I honestly didn’t think I would ever get to listen to anything like them again. And then I went to Pohoda Festival in the summer of 2018, and was lucky to see Zeal and Ardor live, thus attend one of the most amazing concerts I have ever been to.

Stranger Fruit is definitely one of the most powerful, inspiring, daring and heartbreaking things I have heard in years. There is almost a complete universe in every melody, in all the harmonies and the noisy guitars. The lyrics are so brutal with their simplicity, full of this elemental power. Everything in this music is filled with so much pain, anger and emotion, it really is overwhelming and heart-wrenching, truly beautiful with all the incredible weight it carries. Favourites: Gravedigger's Chant, You Ain't Coming Back, Built On Ashes (this last one is literally the saddest thing ever) 

Pabllo Vittar Não para não I’ve been wishing for a pop album like Não para não for such a long time. I would even go as far as to say I needed it. It’s empowering, sexy, fun, creative, catchy as hell - full of beautiful harmonies and lyrics, awesome Latin beats, tunes played on an accordion - I mean how cool is that? Pabllo is an incredibly talented songwriter, a truly amazing singer, an iconic diva, and to me, her music his incredibly creative and elaborate, and has so much more depth than the songs of the most famous American superstars. (Just to be clear, diva is an absolutely positive word in my vocabulary. It means a person who is fully aware of the talent he or she has, believes in him/herself and goes after what she or he wants, setting an example for us less awesome people.) I love the whole thing from the first moment to the very last, from the perfect pop album-starter, sass-filled club hit Buzina to the Latin pop song titled No Hablo Espanol and the soft closure in the form of the last track Miragem, a graceful finish to what essentially is a break-up record. My absolute favourites are Seu Crime, Nao Vou Deitar and Trago Seu Amor de Volta - these are the perfect examples of the music I have a soft spot for: upbeat, dance-y and happy-sounding, when in reality it is full of sadness and heartbreak.

Anyway. This album will always be close to my heart because I listened to it all the time during my very first trip to New York (or anywhere outside Europe for that matter), so it will always remind me of dancing and singing on the streets of Brooklyn with my headphones on. It made me so unbelievably happy in a very difficult period of my life, and as I don’t speak Portuguese I didn’t even know back then that I was listening to songs that probably have been inspired by another difficult period in another person’s life. Yet the album, especially the songs I highlighted managed to touch something inside me, and I think it’s because Pabllo is one of those songwriters who is able to create depth in her melodies and her vocals as well, not just the lyrics. Which is so, so rare. These people are the best, their songs are like gifts to me and I will always be grateful for them. 

Florence + The Machine High as Hope There’s a liberating boldness and a piercing honesty in this album with all these unexpected confessions from Florence that hit you hard with their openness. I think it’s the very first time she is sharing things that are so deeply personal, and it feels like I’ve been given a gift. To me, she seems like she’s more herself than ever. Listening to these songs she even feels happy to me, like someone who managed to fully embrace herself with all her imperfections. It has an effect on me that’s uplifting and tear-jerking at the same time, I feel like it’s overwhelming me with the universal love and forgiveness Florence expresses towards the world and our faulty humanity. The most prominent example for this is the song Hunger, which is a truly magnificent thing that blows me away every time I listen to it. 

I also love Big God, with its boldness and the melody that reminds me of the early (and coolest) songs of Tori Amos. June is among my favorites as well, it’s the perfect Track no.1 for an album, the way it gradually builds to a cathartic beauty with its simple but wise message.

So what can I even say after this? The songs are amazing, captivating, they bring the usual Florence-like monumental and powerful melodies and production, with mind-blowing vocals (I mean, duuuh), but the majority of the songs here are more on the quieter, more subtle side, which is quite refreshing for me as they sound a lot more natural and pure than the very epic songs on Ceremonials. All in all, this is clearly my favourite Florence + the Machine album, and definitely one of the best albums of 2018. 

Men Named Holger Maelstrom Ahead! Men Named Holger’s debut album is a concept album set in the world of pirates, an amazingly complex thing that is brilliant in how it gradually peels off all the false layers we associate with the adventurous life at the sea - freedom, partying, being outlaws and not giving a damn about anything. This album shows the dark side of this freedom, and through its pirate-related theme it presents heavy feelings and heart-wrenching thoughts we all suffer from sometimes. Like having your people turn against against you even though you did everything you could for them. Or the feeling that you can’t show your true self because you know you will never be accepted by those around you. The feeling when you’re finally free and have left everything behind, followed by this bitter aftertaste in the back of your mind that says it wasn’t really your choice. Or the stinging pain in your heart upon leaving your home, looking ahead in the far distance knowing that you have nowhere to go and that you don’t belong anywhere.

So yeah, this is not the typical pirate-ish-sailor-ish stuff you usually rock out to at Irish pubs - you can absolutely rock out to it, but it’s so much more complex. The guys literally created an own world for their music. They used at least 20 instruments (mandolin, musical saw, balalaika, ukulele, banjo, etc.) to record these songs themselves, which is pretty impressive, yet, it’s not what makes Maelstrom Ahead! exceptional. It’s the emotional depth that’s not only present in the lyrics but in all the melodies, every little note and heartbreaking harmony. It’s a really elaborate and well-thought out album with exciting and versatile songs full of delightful twists and turns that pull you in completely, taking you to an entirely different world. 

[micaramel]

Artist: Susan Philipsz

Venue: Tanya Bonakdar, Los Angeles

Exhibition Title: Sleep Close and Fast

Date: July 15 – September 19, 2020

Click here to view slideshow



Full gallery of images, press release and link available after the jump.

Images:

Video:



Susan Philipsz at Tanya Bonakdar, Sleep Close and Fast, walkthrough, 2020, 08:11

Images courtesy of the artist and Tanya Bonakdar Gallery, New York/Los Angeles. Photos by Jeff McLane.

Press Release:

Tanya Bonakdar Gallery is pleased to announce Sleep Close and Fast, Susan Philipsz’s first solo exhibition at the gallery’s Los Angeles location on view July 15 – September 19, 2020. This will be the artist’s debut one-person exhibition on the West Coast, following the US premiere of her twelve-channel installation Prelude in the Form of a Passacaglia (2020) at the Walt Disney Concert Hall in Los Angeles on February 6, 2020.

Sleep Close and Fast presents a new seven channel sound installation featuring recordings of lullabies sung in the artist’s own voice. Culled from a variety of sources including cult horror films, opera and literature, the lullabies chosen all share dark and haunting undertones. Emanating from stainless steel barrels, the sculptural acoustics suggest deep space, distance and memory. The voice recordings are accompanied by a percussion beat set to the rhythm of the artist’s heartbeat, acting as a metronome for the lullaby.

The composition of lullabies include references that range from Engelbert Humperdinck’s opera Hansel and Gretel (1983), Roman Polanski’s film Rosemary’s Baby (1968), Aleksis Kivi’s novel Seven Brothers (1870), Dario Argento’s film Profondo Rosso (1975) to Robin Hardy’s film The Wicker Man (1973). In The Wicker Man (1973), the film portrays a policeman who is called to a remote Scottish island to investigate the disappearance of a missing child. The case turns out to be a ruse, and the officer is captured and prepared for sacrifice to ensure a fruitful harvest. There is an unnerving scene at the end of the film which features a gentle lullaby sung by Brit Ekland and Diane Cilento. The soft slow descending scale and reassuring lyrics, ‘sleep close and fast’, contrasts with the horror the policeman is about to experience. Intertwining sleep with death, these seemingly soothing songs often have dual meanings and are laced with disturbing lyrics. The sounds are contained within each of the barrels and the sense of distance and isolation is palpable.

In an adjacent gallery, three organ pipes emit the deeply resonant sound of the artist’s own breath traveling through the instrument, evoking a sense of life and mortality. After producing the recordings of her breath moving through the metal forms, Philipsz projected the sound from a small speaker placed inside each pipe. Physically connected, the noises from the objects overlap and diverge, resembling a call-and-response dialogue suggesting sleep.

Illustrating the physical act of breathing, Philipsz’s photography series captures the fleeting condensation of the artist’s breath on panes of glass. Suggesting human presence and absence, these works compose an intimate act as a faceless self-portrait. The title of the series, Vernebelt is a German word relating to “mist” that was used to describe individuals who vanished without a trace under the Third Reich.

Over the past two decades, Susan Philipsz has explored the psychological and sculptural potential of sound. The artist’s immersive environments of architecture and song heighten the visitor’s engagement with their surroundings while inspiring thoughtful introspection. The music Philipsz selects responds specifically to the space in which the work is installed. While each piece is unique, the storylines and references are often recognizable, exploring familiar themes of loss, longing, hope, and return. These universal narratives trigger personal reactions while also temporarily bridging the gaps between the individual and the collective, as well as interior and exterior spaces.

Born in 1965 in Glasgow, Philipsz currently lives and works in Berlin. She received a BFA in Sculpture from Duncan of Jordanstone College in Dundee, Scotland in 1993, and an MFA from the University of Ulster in Belfast in 1994. In 2000, she completed a fellowship at MoMA PS1 in New York and in 2015 was an artist-in-residence at Villa Aurora in Los Angeles. She received the Turner Prize in 2010 and was awarded an OBE in 2014 for services to British art.

Since the mid-1990s, Philipsz’s sound installations have been exhibited at many prestigious institutions and public venues around the world. She has presented solo exhibitions at Pulitzer Arts Foundation in St. Louis (2019), Castello di Rivoli in Italy (2019), Tate Modern (2018) and Tate Britain (2015) in London, Bonniers Konsthall in Stockholm (2017), Kunsthaus Bregenz in Austria (2016), Hamburger Bahnhof in Berlin (2014), the Carnegie Museum of Art in Pittsburgh (2013), K21 Standehaus Kunstsammlung Nordrhein-Westfalen in Dusseldorf (2013), Museum of Contemporary Art in Chicago (2011), Aspen Art Museum in Colorado (2010-11), Wexner Center for the Arts at Ohio State in Columbus (2009-10), Museum Ludwig in Cologne (2009), Institute of Contemporary Art in London (2008), among others. Installations by Philipsz were included in Skulptur Projekte Muenster in 2007 and the 55th Carnegie International in 2008. Her work Study for Strings was conceived for dOCUMENTA 13 in 2012 and was performed at the Pulitzer Arts Foundation in 2020, in conjunction with Philipsz’s solo exhibition there.

The artist’s major commissions include Lowlands, her Turner Prize-winning work for Glasgow International in 2010, SURROUND ME: A Song Cycle for the City of London, a public project organized by Artangel in London (2010-11), Day is Done, a permanent installation organized by the Trust for Governors Island in New York (2014), New Canaan, a project for the Grace Farms Foundation (2015), and most recently Prelude in the Form of a Passacaglia, commissioned by LACMA Senior Curator Stephanie Barron and independent curator Nana Demand for LA Phil’s programming Weimar Variations at the Walt Disney Concert Hall in Los Angeles in February 2020.

Philipsz’s work can be found in the collections of the Baltimore Museum of Art, Fondation Beyeler in Switzerland, Carnegie Museum of Art in Pittsburgh, Castello di Rivoli in Italy, Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum in New York, Hirshhorn Museum and Sculpture Garden in Washington D.C., Museo Nacional Centro de Arte Reina Sofia in Spain, Museum of Contemporary Art, Chicago, Museum Ludwig in Germany, National Gallery of Victoria in Australia, SFMOMA in San Francisco, The Tate in London, Walker Art Center in Minneapolis, and The Bass Museum of Art in Miami.

Link: Susan Philipsz at Tanya Bonakdar

from Contemporary Art Daily https://bit.ly/314Fq8q

[aurora-daily]

Pop singer Aurora strikes a chord

SPECIAL FEATURE: Aurora Aksnes is a 22-year-old Norwegian pop singer who’s been steadily gaining international popularity in recent years. Calla Duffield is a 14-year-old fan and aspiring journalist from College Station, Texas, who got a chance to interview the singer known simply as “Aurora” before a concert in Liverpool this summer. Here’s the unabashedly starstruck Duffield’s account of the encounter, which offers insight into how and why Aurora has struck a chord with so many followers around the world.

Interview: Aurora for News In English by Calla Duffield (July 22nd, 2018)

At the Liverpool International Music Festival last July, staffers led me to a secure area behind the stage where the performers’ trailers were located. I caught a glimpse of Aurora as we passed her trailer and cried a little to myself (I know it sounds cheesy, but she has that effect on me).

Her assistant told us that Aurora wanted to sit outside for our interview because it was unseasonably hot that day and her trailer was sweltering, so we did an awkward dance around some folding chairs (or at least I did) before settling in to talk in the shade.

In person, Aurora is slight and tiny—just 5’3”, like me. She was wearing a sunny yellow dress over layers of tulle skirts along with sunflower wristbands and sneakers (Aurora usually goes barefoot or wears flats onstage so she can run around and dance more easily). She has said she dresses the way she feels; I hope yellow that day meant happy!

Aurora asked my name; I was almost too starstruck to move my mouth. While speaking, she gestures expressively, just like when she performs, with hands flying in the air. Her voice was soft and she was kind, and although I had just 10 minutes to ask questions (another interviewer was waiting and Aurora would soon take the festival stage), while we were talking, I felt like we were all alone.

Before we met, I had watched many of her performances online: Onstage she projects a kind of Viking power, storming around like a warrior stalking her enemy. Her presentation is soulful but energizing, and looking out at the audience, Aurora seems to grab fans with her eyes, dancing with them even though they are far apart. Watching her is like watching a play: her lively pale face expresses the meaning in her lyrics, and her melodies and dancing amplifies it.

I first encountered Aurora’s music when I was 12 while sitting on the floor folding paper cranes at my friend Gloria’s house. We were listening to Aurora’s Murder Song, which tells the story of a mercy killing. The haunting melody entranced me because of how well it fit the story.

At first I was drawn to Aurora’s persona: a mix of warrior princess, wise and noble poet, and wild and free fairy, and to her strange style of dancing, of storytelling with her body—jerking her hands around to paint a picture in the air as she sang.

Her songs weren’t about love or heartbreak, unlike most other songs on the radio; they were about love for the earth and humanity and navigating life. And I could relate to them because, being 12, I was far more interested in nature and the meaning of life than anything about romance.

After that, I played and sang her music constantly and made sure my parents knew I would jump at the chance to see Aurora in concert. At the beginning of the summer, I learned from fan sites that she’d be performing at the Liverpool festival in July—around the time we would be visiting my grandmother who lives just outside of London. “Was there any chance we could go?” I asked my parents.

They immediately confessed, much to my surprise, that they already had acquired tickets. And because I had previously expressed an interest in journalism, my mother, a professor of journalism at Texas A&M University, had been trying to arrange for me to interview Aurora.

I composed an email that included a short bio, reasons Aurora should grant me an interview, my photo, and a few sample questions. I emailed it to the festival’s press office, and crossed my fingers. Just a few days later, I got my answer: Aurora said yes! My mom and I jumped around our kitchen screaming.

Just a week after that, I was sitting inches from Aurora asking questions, posing for photos and even getting multiple hugs. I started off by asking about her theme for the show.

“Everything”, she said — a very Aurora-like answer; with fans and reporters, she can be both playful and vague. I tried not to have any preconceptions of what she might be like, but her distinctive child/sage personality comes through very clearly in her music and in previous interviews.

Celebrating diversity Her recently released song, Queendom, is about feeling a sense of belonging and “about celebrating all the differences in us,” according to the description on her YouTube video. It is about “a place where we can come and be lonely together and then not be lonely anymore.”

At a time when many people seem so hateful, I asked, what gives her hope for such a place?

“People are quite angry,” Aksnes agreed, “but I think it’s because people are bored … and they are restless and need to feel they are part of something bigger…”

Queendom is also about Aurora’s feeling of connection to her fans, she said. “I feel that we are all family … Queendom is that kind of place, and kind of attitude, that we [should] have towards people.” To Aksnes, Queendom is about spreading kindness and compassion.

Support for ‘the weirdos’ What advice would she give to kids who might feel weird or out of place?

“I always felt like I was a bit of a strange thing when I was little… ” Aksnes said. “I’m still strange. Some people like it and some people don’t.”

Kids who feel they don’t belong should keep in mind that school is “so small, such a tiny world, and there’s so much more, bigger things waiting for you, especially (for) us weirdos…” Aksnes said. Weirdos are “going places, because they are different.”

In previous interviews, Aksnes described growing up in a small town outside Bergen, Norway, without smart phones and computers. “I think it helps with creativity,” she told me. No gadgets means “more time…to just kind of force yourself to make something out of nothing.”

At the same time, Aksnes said, “it would be sad to say that (electronics are a) bad thing because it’s the future, all those phones and screens. I guess we will have to try to embrace it as much as we can, and kind of find the positive sides of it.” Among those positives, she said, “we can connect with people and learn about cultures, [and] you can get to know another girl in Egypt and become best friends.”

On the other hand, Aksnes said, “I thought (technology) would bring people more together than it actually has so far. But let’s hope that it will evolve in the right way.” At the moment, she added, “it doesn’t teach us to appreciate our (lives), it just teaches us to compare our lives (with others), which is very unhealthy.”

Aiming for ‘a long, long career’ Before leaving for England, I had asked Aurora’s fans on Instagram what they would want to ask her. This brought only one response: when would she be performing in Romania?

“Oh it’s ok,” Aurora said, laughing. “Maybe all the others were sleeping.”

Asknes doesn’t organize her schedule, she said; “I have people doing these things for me, because … I have other things to think about. I have a booking manager, a booking agent, and he does everything.” The team behind Aksnes “all have each task for ourselves, that we can be good at and contribute to our main goal,” she said, “which is me having a long, long career.”

Her band is made up of extraordinary musicians in their own right, but they came together in a random way, she said. Bergen is a small town and “they were the first people we found and also the best … and we are still together!”

Although her first language is Norwegian, she writes almost all her songs in English. Will she ever release the two songs she has written in Norwegian?

“Maybe one day, because it’s nice to listen to songs without understanding the words,” she said, smiling and clearly referring to her fans outside Norway.

Some listeners may perceive a spiritual quality in Aksnes’ music. She doesn’t follow any particular religion, she said, but “as long as it does not cause harm, or become an excuse to do harm, then I’m all for (religion),” she sad. “I am very spiritual,” she added, “but not in a material way.”

Last and most importantly, I wanted to know, when is Aksnes coming to Texas?

“I’ve been to Austin once, and I loved it!” she said, smiling. “The margaritas there are very good! I’ll be back,” she added, grinning, before giving me another hug. “Probably next year.”