#lowest influence possible

[nepthys-merenset]

i started a second playthrough of HOT because i wanted to romance gisella, be a bad queen, and stay away from reinhold. let's just say i'm succeeding in 2/3 of those things.

[a-dash-in-the-middle]

Call centers for URGENT CARE AND HOSPITALS are hell on earth

I think talking to the wall might bring better results

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Stages of Decomposition

The decomposition process occurs in several stages following death:

Pallor mortis

Algor mortis

Rigor mortis

Cadaveric spasm

Lividity

Putrefaction

Decomposition

Skeletonization

PALLOR MORTIS

The first stage of death.

Occurs once blood stops circulating in the body.

The cessation of an oxygenated blood flow to the capillaries beneath the skin causes the deceased to pale in appearance.

In non-Caucasians, the pallor may appear to develop an unusual hue; the skin will lose any natural lustre and appears more waxen.

Occurs quite quickly, within about 10 minutes after death.

ALGOR MORTIS

The cooling of the body after death.

The cooling process will be influenced by many factors, including the deceased’s clothing, or whether they are covered with bed linen such as blankets or duvets.

The body will typically cool to the ambient room temperature, but this alters if there is heating in the room or if there is a constant draught cooling the body.

RIGOR MORTIS

Can occur between 2 and 6 hours after death.

Factors including temperature can greatly affect this.

Caused by the muscles partially contracting, and the lack of aerobic respiration means that the muscles cannot relax from the contraction, leaving them tense, subsequently resulting in the stiffening we associate with rigor mortis.

This stage typically begins in the head, starting with the eyes, mouth, jaw and neck, and progresses right through the body.

The process is concluded approximately 12 hours after death (although, again, certain variables may occur) and lasts between 24 and 72 hours depending on circumstances.

Contrary to popular belief, rigor mortis is not a permanent state and is in fact reversed, with the muscles relaxing in the same order in which they initially stiffened.

The reversing process also takes approximately 12 hours, when the body returns to its un-contracted state.

It is possible to ‘break’ rigor mortis by manipulating and flexing the limbs. This is usually done by undertakers, pathologists or crime scene investigators who are attempting to examine or move a body – or by a murderer trying to hide their victim in the closet or the boot of a car.

CADAVERIC SPASM

A phenomenon that can be misinterpreted as rigor mortis.

The instantaneous stiffening of the body (most commonly the hands) following a traumatic death.

Unlike rigor mortis, the stiffening of the affected limb is permanent and is not reversed, causing the deceased to maintain the rigidity until such time as putrefaction causes breakdown of the particular muscle group.

Examples:

The deceased following an air crash were later discovered still clutching their seatbelts or arm rests in a final, desperate act of survival.

In a drowning case, the victim was discovered with grass from the riverbank still grasped in their hand.

Perhaps the most famous case of cadaveric spasm involves the rock band Nirvana’s lead singer, Kurt Cobain. Cobain reportedly committed suicide in April 1994. His body was discovered a few days after his death with a shotgun wound to the head, and tests revealed he had large traces of heroin in his system. He was reportedly discovered still clutching the gun in his left hand, due to cadaveric spasm. However, a great deal of controversy surrounds the veracity of this latter assumption, and indeed the cause of his death, with many people insisting and attempting to prove that he died as the result of foul play rather than suicide.

LIVIDITY

Also known as livor mortis, hypostasis, or suggillation.

Once blood can no longer circulate, it will gravitate towards the lowest point of the body.

Example: A supine body will display pinkish/purple patches of discoloration where the blood has settled in the back and along the thighs.

Occurs about 30 minutes after death, but will not necessarily be noticeable until at least 2 hours afterwards as the pooling process intensifies and becomes visible, finally peaking up to between 8 and 12 hours later.

Once it is complete, the lividity process cannot be reversed.

Therefore a body discovered lying on its side, but with staining evident in the back and shoulders, must have been moved at some point from what would have been a supine position at the time of death.

It is worth noting that if the body has had contact with the floor, a wall or other solid surface, lividity would not occur at the points of contact as the pressure would not allow the blood to seep through the capillaries and pool. The specific area of pressure will be the same colour as the rest of the body and a pattern of contact may well be evident.

PUTREFACTION

Derives from the Latin putrefacere, meaning ‘to make rotten’.

The body becomes rotten through the process known as autolysis, which is the liquefaction of bodily tissue and organs and the breakdown of proteins within the body due to the increased presence of bacteria.

The first visible sign is the discoloration of the skin in the area of the abdomen.

Bacteria released from the intestine cause the body to become bloated with a mixture of gases; over time these will leak out, and the smell will intensify to unbearable proportions.

Typically, this will attract flies that will lay eggs, which develop into maggots.

Bloating is most evident in the stomach area, genitals and face, which can become unrecognizable as the tongue and eyes are forced to protrude due to the pressure of the build-up of gases in the body.

At this stage, the body will also begin to lose hair.

The organs typically decompose in a particular order: starting with the stomach, followed by the intestines, heart, liver, brain, lungs, kidney, bladder and uterus/prostate.

Once all the gases have escaped the skin begins to turn black: this stage is called ‘black putrefaction’.

As with all the other stages of death so far, the rate of putrefaction depends on temperature and location. A body exposed to the air above ground will decompose more quickly than a body left in water or buried below ground.

During putrefaction, blistering of the skin and fermentation can also occur:

Fermentation - a type of mould that will grow on the surface of the body. This mould appears white, and is slimy or furry in texture. It also releases a very strong, unpleasant, cheesy smell.

As the putrefaction process comes to an end, fly and maggot activity will become less, which leads to the next stage.

DECOMPOSITION

The body is an organic substance comprising organisms that can be broken down by chemical decomposition.

If the body is outside, any remains that have not been scavenged or consumed by maggots will liquefy and seep into the surrounding soil.

Thus when the body decomposes it is effectively recycled and returned to nature.

SKELETONIZATION

The final stage of death is known as ‘dry decay’, when the cadaver has all but dried out: the soft tissue has all gone and only the skeleton remains.

If the cadaver is outside, not only is it exposed to the elements but it also becomes food for scavengers such as rats, crows or foxes.

As the remains are scavenged, the body parts become dispersed so it is not unusual to find skeletal remains some distance from where the body lay at the point of death.

The way in which skeletal remains are scattered in such cases is of interest to archaeologists, and is referred to as taphonomy.

Where a body has lain undiscovered at home for a period of time it has also been known for family pets, typically dogs, to feed on the body. The natural instinct of a pet is to attempt to arouse the deceased by licking them, but once it gets hungry, its survival instinct will take over and it will consider the body as little more than carrion: it will act with the same natural instinct as a scavenger in the wild, which will feed on any corpse, be it animal or human, if it is starving.

Obviously the number of pets, the body mass of the deceased and the time lapse before the body is discovered will influence to what extent it has been devoured.

For further research on the stages of decomposition and the factors that affect it, look up body farms. These are medical facilities where bodies are donated for research purposes so scientists can specifically observe the decomposition process. However, be aware that some of the images are quite graphic.

Source ⚜ More: References ⚜ Autopsy ⚜ Pain & Violence ⚜ Injuries Bereavement ⚜ Death & Sacrifice ⚜ Cheating Death ⚜ Death Conceptions

[thecoiledserpent]

↻ DARAKARAKA PLANET AND THE NATURE OF THE SPOUSE

basics of vedic astrology. ask box. pinned.

the planet having the lowest degree among the seven planets—sun, moon, mercury, venus, mars, jupiter and saturn is your darakaraka (abbrev.—dk). it is the planet that represents the nature of your 'opposite', or your future spouse.

note that this also represents the traits that you yourself do not embody. the partner is a form of the cumulations of traits that we most often desire in ourselves, what we seek subconsciously.

you can also think of your darakaraka planet as what you desire to be. for example, someone with a mars dk may desire to be more outspoken, energetic and courageous. darakaraka is the last significator among the seven planets because your future spouse is your other half; or, alternatively, it is representative of the things that you lack.

i would like to highlight that simply the planet is not enough an indicator of your spouse. the nakshatra placement of said placement matters a lot, too.

say, a female native has purva ashada jupiter in 7h with magha venus dk in 3h. both jupiter and darakaraka are massive fs indicators. we notice that jupiter is in a venus ruled nak and the dk is venus as well, so the fs will for sure be venus dominant. additionally, dk planet in magha indicates the fs may have ketuvian influence to their personality / appearance. maybe a gaunt body, or magnetic eyes. their ancestors (pitris) would be respected and / or worshipped in their family tradition. they might have a kingly personality. jupiter in 7h further increases their venusian quality. so we study the fs using many combinations like these. now say this person's venus was in 3rd house aries in navamsa. the relationship will be sexually passionate, and the spouse could be of fiery demeanour. impatient, and demanding. they could be oblivious to the native's efforts a times, and this would hurt them. if say venus was also combust from sun, then there would be quarrels with the spouse. if venus was conjunct mars closely, then the native could be promiscuous leading to fights with the spouse. if venus was conjunct mercury, the fs could have a sibling.

so on, and so forth. i've tried my best to be as inclusive and detailed as possible; but know that these are general observations. your fs won't be a king just because it sounds like that. i speak by taking both, the worst and best case scenarios.

SUN DARAKARAKA

if you hope to expand your business, form connections or just overall want to improve your professional life, then sun darakaraka is a good indication that your spouse will help you in said endeavour. they will very likely be the dominant partner in the relationship, or at least be responsible for the more practical side of the relationship.

the spouse is a resemblance of the native's outward nature. it is not the best thing to have sun or moon as dk since there are ego issues involved in these placements. the spouse is a reflection of who the native is internally or externally, and their negative traits could trigger the native. while transformation is a good thing, in a married couple it can lead to resentment. i personally believe that with a sun or moon dk it is advisable to cultivate patience. understanding yourself is key to understanding the spouse.

they are nurturing but may turn controlling. it would be good to take some time away from them and spend it on yourself to ensure you don't completely give in to everything they say and lose your personality. also, to be fair, they don't appreciate dependent or weak people. so if you lose your sense of personality around them, then you might end up loosing your romantic appeal in their eyes. make them realise that they're not the only thing in your life and their respect for you will always remain high.

the relationship here can easily turn egoistical, so it is advisable to ensure that the spouse does not turn too distant. they can take impulsive decisions at times, so keep an eye on them discreetly (because they will not appreciate it if they catch you, either). just look out for them, i mean. with a sun dk, the spouse may have a broad face and traditionally masculine appearance. wide shoulders, or long legs. strong arms and thigh region. there could be stress around their eyes or neck region, and they could often overwork themselves.

the spouse would appreciate being looked after. simple gestures aren't enough to win their heart, but they never go unnoticed. it affirms them and encourages them to look after their spouse, so they will return the favour in the form of actions and taking more responsibility off your shoulders. ( i was kind of hesitating in saying this but here we go; sun dk may indicate a spouse who likes a tease😉 yk, the usual; decorating the bedroom with flowers / candles / whatever aesthetic they appreciate and wearing smth sexy gets them going 😏 they are genuinely hard working though, so they find themselves both physically and emotionally fulfilled when presented with such gestures. ) they may not act romantic all the time, because their way of expressing love is by taking as much burden off their spouse's shoulders as possible.

MOON DARAKARAKA

a moon dk makes the native less emotional by nature and their spouse is more emotional than them. the spouse is usually beautiful, or at least has rounder features. for those who seek women partners, moon dk bestows fertility, beauty and fine speech. for those seek male partners, moon dk bestows wit, round features, medium to short stature, and the ability to lie and manipulate.

lunar energy is better handled by women; and in men, lunar energy is only nurtured properly if the moon is in good dignity or the native also has leo placements. moon in detriment for lunar male native will make him apathetic to the plight of women and he may also be corrupt by nature. regardless, a mood dk will not be very beneficial if moon is overall weak or a malefic in the chart. the spouse would be emotionally unstable or have mental disorders in the worst case.

with a moon dk, your spouse would light up your domestic life. because the native would not be much interested in the home and hearth themselves (especially if they don't have cancer or taurus placements), the spouse will look after most of the organization of the house. yes, this can bestow a selfish character to the native. but not mandatorily, of course. the native would like seeing the home clean but may not contribute much to it. that, or the spouse would rather look over the house of their own accord.

the spouse would be intensely passionate about their career. whatever they do to make an earning, it will be almost religious to them. work is like duty to them. they worship it, and they respect money and labour. they may overwork themselves to stay true to their selves to the point of developing eating disorders or losing physical charm. (lose physical charm in the sense that they may suddenly lose a lot of weight and our body fat, rolls and curves are a part of our auspiciousness and beauty.)

the domestic life would be pleasurable and the in-laws are usually quite happy when the native having moon dk has a female partner. she will be of gentle nature, and also be sexually, uh, hungry? lenient? demanding? somehow, a mix of all three. she will desire sex, and she will be lustful and she may even chase after others after wedlock if the dk moon is aspected by mars or venus. hence why moon can give mixed results. in the best case scenario she would be chaste, highly ambitious about her career, caring, impressive and melancholic.

the spouse is a resemblance of the native's internal nature. it is not the best thing to have sun or moon as dk since there are ego issues involved in these placements. the spouse is a reflection of who the native is internally or externally, and their negative traits could trigger the native. while transformation is a good thing, in a married couple it can lead to resentment. i personally believe that with a sun or moon dk it is advisable to cultivate patience. understanding yourself is key to understanding the spouse.

be patient with a female spouse. she will be emotionally vulnerable and gentle hearted. her mood swings will be irrational and intolerable at times, and it is advisable to simply let her be by herself to calm down for a while. be cautious with a male spouse. he may be disloyal and seek other partners even after wedlock. he may especially have such tendencies if his own venus is conjunct mars. he would be even more prone to showing such behaviour when upset, so don't just let him storm off. a nice meal or a forceful hug almost always has these people listening. also, don't break their trust; they completely lose respect for your words and promises after that.

MERCURY DARAKARAKA

an ideal darakaraka if you're looking for a spouse who will also be your partner-in-crime, as well as closest confidant. the spouse will be as much a friend as a partner, and themes of light-heartedness will be apparent. they may appear air-headed, but their appearance is not one to go by; especially those who are seeking to have a female partner.

the spouse would be clever, with a lot of connections and a good social life. if they want to, they can pull strings to get their work done. they enjoy the leisure of life and may have hedonistic tendencies. regardless, they are clever and diplomatic. they know what to say, and what not to. even their silence has meaning. anger manifests as abandonment with them, so if you're not observant enough, you may end up chasing them away further when they are upset. they are less emotional and adopt rationality in most situations.

they would be charming, with attractive facial features. they may be medium to tall in height or skinny. their face could be symmetric in a unique way. as in, moles on exact opposite sides of the face, or a completely symmetric hairline. regardless, they will be very finicky about their appearance and would require reassurance from their spouse (you). they could be a lover of flowery scents or wooden undertones. if natal mercury is in water sign then they could adore the smell of wet earth. if natal mercury is in ketu nakshatras, then they could be childish and innocently oblivious in matters of the heart.

they may seek company just as a child does, and can be childish. they may test others' patience sometimes. they may accidentally upset their mother-in-law, which may lead to fights with the spouse. they may love being chased in the relationship. they would be forever young, and be appreciated for their liveliness even in old age. they are a trickster, and would have tendencies to manipulate others if dk mercury is also in mercury nakshatras or natal mercury is in 7th/8th house.

if mercury becomes dk while forming mahapurusha yoga, the spouse would be endowed with fine speech, a quick mind, ability to make money and manage it well. they would be bright of mind and likeable. they would almost have a childish charm that attracts people to them, allowing them many opportunities in life. they would have a pleasant disposition and be fond of laughter. they could also like sweet meats or chocolate.

VENUS DARAKARAKA

a genuinely good darakaraka placement to have. if darakaraka venus is in leo, the native will respect women a lot. if dk leo venus is in the 2nd or 3rd house, native may be oral about their activism for women empowerment.

for venus dk, the married life will be pleasurable. the spouse will be attractive, charming, have pleasing aesthetics and pay attention to cleanliness. they often pay good attention to their spouse (the native themselves, that is) and are romantic. they may appreciate gestures that express love, however big or small they may be. although they could be vain, or even prideful in the worst of cases. if venus is weak in the chart, then there will be struggles in the married life. there could be arguments, and problems in conceiving.

the spouse will be what the native desires in a partner. they will have ideal characteristics a wife may desire of her husband, although he / she may not make a good parent. it is important not to ignore the children in favour of the spouse. the native having venus dk will be the more prominent parent in the child's life. the home and hearth will be comforting places for the couple, and the home will be beautifully decorated. they will go on vacations often, too.

the spouse will resemble the ideal beauty of their gender / race / nationality etc. they may even have an auspicious appearance; as in, soft pink feet, heart shaped face, curly hair, lotus shaped birth mark, moles on the face for women etc.

venus in the dharma trikona: the spouse will be knowledgeable and fair. they will value justice as a part of society and may dislike selfishness or displays of lack of dignity or grace. they will be well guided in life and guide their spouse towards greater heights as well. the native will respect their spouse a lot. the married life will be divinely protected and the couple will share many successes, gain prosperity and receive luxuries. if the venus is weak while in the dharma trikona, the spouse may be morally corrupt. the spouse would be more self centered and may even ignore their children in favour of the native. venus in the artha trikona: a favourable placement to have if the native is involved in business or is career focused and wishes to climb the stairs of material success. the spouse will support this pursuit both in terms of connections and their own, personal effort towards encouraging the native and helping them with technicalities. there will be no lack of material wealth. dk venus in 6th house will make the couple devoted to each other and they would not engage in promiscuity. even more favourable if the native is a libra rising. the couple will donate a lot, and will gain name and fame for their generosity. if venus is unfavourable in the chart, the spouse will be greedy for money, fame and power. they would have no problem manipulating the native and the couple will share mistrust. the native may end up resenting the spouse. money will be abundant, but it will be spent for one reason or the other as soon as it comes into the house. venus in the kama trikona: luxury, a large, beautiful and envy-inspiring home, gifts from the spouse and the like themes are associated here. a personal blessing from the gods if venus also receives aspects from saturn or jupiter. even jupiter's gaze falling on venus is highly auspicious. money will be spent easily and in abundance, but it will also come in the house quickly. if saturn aspects venus, the spouse will appreciate budgeting. just an overall great placement to have, the spouse is intensely romantic for this placement. if venus is unfavourable in the chart, the spouse could be finicky and stingy; but only towards the native. the native will not enjoy their position as the spouse. the native will feel unloved because of the lack of action and initiative in their romantic ventures from their spouse. the spouse may try to make up for it with sweet words, but it will not satisfy the native. venus in the moksha trikona: a highly favourable placement if you wish to pursue spirituality, or work towards occult sciences after marriage. the spouse will be spiritually inclined and the relation between the couple will be emotionally rich. truly magical, it reminds me of that one hindi movie wherein a kashmiri couple are displaced from their home due to terrorist activities and have to live as refugees in the outskirts of delhi and punjab. they struggle a lot, but the love between them only deepens the further life tests their bond. suffice to say that there will be struggles when the princely venus is thrown into the mud of struggles of common life, but it is only under these circumstances that a lotus blooms. concluding, i wish to say that this placement is not as dreamy as the others, but the spouse is very supporting, kind and encourages the native to attain moksha. the spouse will believe in spirituality and gods grace will be upon this couple if jupiter, saturn or sun aspect venus. with aspects from sun, ensure venus is not combust, otherwise quarrels will be there in the relationship. an unfavourable venus in these houses will reap the opposite results. the spouse can be materialistic. they could show hedonistic tendencies and be unemotional. lack of understanding within the relationship, and worst case scenario, the spouse may cheat on the native. it is advisable to chant sri suktam as often as possible in a divine, quaint and clean setting. keep the bedroom clean, and avoid letting too many people into your sleeping chambers.

venus while being dk if forms a mahapurusha yoga gives a highly knowledgeable spouse who would be interested in occult sciences and have great desire to master the vedas. they would be of beautiful physique and very likely rich. they would form a lot of connections and the women in their life would be highly supportive of them. they would be sensual and romantic. as a parent they would teach their child to respect women foremost, and would set an amazing example of an ideal man / woman by treating their spouse with love and respect. their child would love them a lot. they could be of kingly / royal background.

i won't be able to make a generalization for other dks other than venus since i was unable to generalize in the others. venus mostly gave the same results, though.

MARS DARAKARAKA

the soul desires a passionate, long lasting love. with a mars darakaraka, other than having a fun, spontaneous and adventurous spouse, the native may also desire wanting to be liberated from societal expectations. go wild, so to say. maybe they limit themselves too much, but mars dk people actually suffer from their rich desires in life that are sometimes even impossible. but other times maybe they just desire dancing in the rain, hanging off a moving car, go scuba diving, etc.

mars dk bestows in the native an intense desire to love, and be loved. these are passionate people and once they decide that they love you, they will look out for you in whatever way they can or you let them. it's not easy for their love to die. mars dk natives lust for intensity, and they prove it. it's really ride or die with these people, they are genuinely obsessive to the point of their own ruin. remember that it's important to remain self loving too, no matter how much you love someone. at the end of the day you're the only one who will love you.

now, the spouse of the mars dk native is often sexually attractive or strong looking. and i mean both in terms of personality and looks, or either even. maybe they look like they could punch you, or just very argumentative, they come off as being strong either way. they have a reddish undertone to their skin and may even have acne. they could have scars on their face or body, and appear experienced with struggles in life. although they aren't, not as much as saturn dk native's spouses anyway.

the spouse would be active, sporty and bright. they could be im jobs that have them running around all day, even a lot of travelling is possible. government jobs that often have them transferring from this place to that. they may even be an engineer if natal mars dk forms contact with saturn. it is preferable that saturn make indirect contact such as via sign exchange, house exchange, or drishti instead of direct conjunction since that will bring struggles into the native's life.

mars dk gives a spouse who is hot tempered and easily loses their patience. they would be tyrannical if mars is combust, and the relationship would suffer a lot due to this. if mars is conjunct venus, then the spouse would be loyal, beautiful and sexually passionate but the native themselves may be of loose morals or character. it is advisable not to keep a toe out of line when in a relationship with a mars dominant person since much like solar people, the relationship runs on two things; namely love and respect. if the respect is lost, the relationship turns bitter and there will be many fights.

the spouse would be appreciative of the native's efforts in life and the native would feel seen with their spouse. they would live a happy life together if jupiter comes into contact with mars. the couple would be blessed with virtuous progeny and all sorts of luxuries in such a case.

mars forming a mahapurusha yoga while being dk would bring a spouse who is virtuous, passionate, fierce, fights for their rights, unafraid of challenges, of reddish skin, having strength in the arms and have sturdy feet and body. this would give excellent results, as well. they would make a good parent, but they may unintentionally transfer their own prejudices / ideas to their children without giving them the space to grow. they would need to work on this. but they would make an amazing spouse who would always stand by your side, even in the most adverse of conditions.

JUPITER DARAKARAKA

the spouse is, by extension, one's teacher when jupiter becomes the darakaraka. the partner will be religious / spiritual, benevolent, wealthy, optimistic, fair and of curvaceous physique. emotionally, they will be private but have a rich inner world. they spend a lot of time cultivating their knowledge and inner world and hence are selective about the crowd they mingle with. but they are still polite and find suitable worth even in the smallest of events or people. they would also love the arts.

the spouse will be money minded. they could prioritize themselves a lot, and could put off an egoistic or sensitive native. it needs to be noted that while they are kind and benevolent, they give worth to their hard work and don't let it go to waste. they utilise connections and place importance in human connections. still, a jupiter dk can give a somewhat distant spouse, emotionally. they will recognize and execute their duties in the house accordingly, and not do anything less or more. they will teach their child good values and would make for good role models.

by extension, i must mention that while this is extremely rare (unfortunately, because most men are entitled pricks who not only learn to disrespect women from their fathers but are also often protected unfairly by their mothers who should, as women themselves, correct them but don't), jupiter darakaraka can bestow the 'ideal' husband who worships his wife. or, the 'ideal' wife who remains devoted and loving to her husband. and not in a leech-like obsessive way, but rather in the way common imagination narrates it.

guidance towards the best ideals, romantic ventures, completely loyalty to the wife / husband, caring and kind, however you envision it. especially true for natives who seek a female partner, since jupiter dominance in female natives usually bestows a virtuous and pleasant personality. of course, a lot of aspects matter here. like a retrograde jupiter will destroy this; or a weak or debilitated jupiter. even jupiter in eighth reduces the auspiciousness of this planet.

darakaraka jupiter mostly bestows good results. it is especially beneficial for the native to inculcate habits of the ministerial jupiter who is of sattwa guna (of auspicious nature), wise, patient and the teacher of all. jupiter is also directly linked with shri hari vishnu, so for hindus, it is advisable to hold fasts on thursday or ekadashi (the 11th day of every month in the hindu calendar) to be under his grace. the grace of shri vishnu is said to save man from the worst depths of hell, and rise from common greed and sin.

wearing gold and yellow hued clothes increases the auspiciousness of one's jupiter.

jupiter forming mahapurusha yoga while being the dk is highly favourable for the native's spiritual life; bestowing a spiritually inclined spouse who would be prosperous and wealthy. they would have a lot of in depth knowledge about various topics of interest and they would love teaching to others. they would be kind to those who wish to learn from them and make for an excellent parent and role model. their child would both fear them and respect them. the child would be closer to the native than the spouse, emotionally. they would also make an excellent and pleasant spouse.

SATURN DARAKARAKA

the spouse is diligent of nature and polite by virtue. they might be the epitome of raising one's own empire; not quite literally, of course. but they will be self made. they are protected by saturn; treating them unfairly will have consequences. if someone manages to achieve something with 2 hours of work, it might take them 6 hours. there remains a theme of struggle with the spouse's life, but they will know how to emerge from tough situations. they would value tradition, culture and religion a lot. they could make their father figure in their life their role model, and end up becoming an even better person than them.

spouse may have dark hair and sunken, tired looking eyes. hooded eyes. tall and lean appearance, regardless of height. they may appear tired all the time, or obvious indicators on their face that they work a lot. mature looking, looks older than their age. usually have long, bony fingers. they might have a strong bone structure in their face. they could be very beautiful if saturn is aspected by jupiter or venus. if not, then they would have a structured face regardless.

the spouse may have uncordial relations with their father, and would be more unconventional by thought. they won't bind themselves with useless restrictions. it might be difficult to understand them, especially emotionally as they might be very reserved in terms of expressions. they will be less romantic and will be more focused on career and the more practical aspects of the relationship over other themes. (this does not mean they will not be romantic, they are just more grounded than the others. they are not lovers of romance like the venus dks or complete workaholics like solar dks. they simply value longevity, is all. lack of structure will put them off and they would rather sort it out first.)

is saturn is conjunct venus, or jupiter, then the spouse's love would stand the test of time. if natal saturn is in 7th house they would like being taken care of in terms of service; as in preparing them a bath, taking care of their study room, washing their hair, managing money or other practical affairs in their stead. they would love you regardless, but they would respect you a lot if you do so.

if natal saturn is in 1st house then they would love giving the same treatment to the native, or at least it would be beneficial for them to. if, however, saturn is also in cap / aqua while in the 1st house, then dk saturn will give adverse results and the good qualities of the spouse would be destroyed. they may even be lazy and dull. however aries saturn in 1st house will give good results, but there will be fights and periods of isolation between the couple.

saturn forming a mahapurusha yoga while being dk would give a spouse who might as well be a millionaire, or have the potential of becoming one. they would be hard-working, respectful and of amazing morality and character. while not everybody would adore them, everyone would certainly respect them. they would be slow, but dedicated and deliberate. they would be very attractive of physique, and if natal mars is conjunct jupiter in the spouse's chart, then they may.. er, be sexually strong. an amazing placement to have! they would teach their child the importance of hard work and diligence and their child would respect them, even though they may not end up being emotionally attached to them.

since we were on the topic of spouses, i wanted to address one major thing which often bothers a lot of people. when we talk about these planets, signs, houses, aspects, etc then we mention a lot of good and bad. we discuss what would be good about the relationship and what would be bad. for venus and jupiter dk i particularly highlighted money, fame and riches. but do all natives having these dk have loving spouses? this is why at the end of the day, it all circles back to karma. which responsibility you ran from in your previous lives, what sins you committed, which people you betrayed, how you betrayed them, etc. if there's one thing that will never leave you then that is the result of your own actions. i know, and i never say that trauma, fear, abuse are things that you deserved because of your bad karma; that was someone else who absolutely ruined their own soul and mind by trying to hurt yours. what karma is, however, the people who could save you but who you never had. trustworthy parents. caring spouse. loving siblings. reliable friends. other souls who care about your soul; and when you don't have them in your life, is when you realize that you have committed wrongs against others. maybe you were the aggressor in some other life. maybe you were a german who secretly revealed a jewish neighbour to the nazis. maybe you were the man who abandoned his wife for his career. maybe you were the child who left their old parents on the streets. maybe you were the child who suicided and left their parents to mourn. maybe you were the sibling in whose favour your parents forcefully married off their more than capable daughter. maybe you were the 14 year old boy who raped a girl; a girl who could have been the next genius but suicided because of you and you never knew. you could be the mother who abandoned her child to marry a richer man. you cold be the father who never loved his girl child so the child never knew what true love was and kept getting manipulated by other men. you could be the co worker due to whom a talented young lady lost her ambition. maybe, maybe, maybe. you will receive punishment for your wrong doings, but even the universe is a form of parent to us. it will not break you to the point of no return, and in every darkness you will find a beacon of light. a pet, maybe. good food, nice friends, random strangers who are kind to you, a sparrows song, a flower's scent; these are all blessings, and it is with exposing ourselves to the truth that we learn and develop as people. the reason i say this is because people have high expectations of their partners, but they could be the worst sort of person in your eyes. and that's okay. at the end of the day you can only carry out your own duty. even wanting to see or understand the fruit of your dutiful nature is a worthless pursuit. please don't be disheartened, we all have our own struggles in life. and in some way, we can all, together help each other to deal with our problems with a kind smile :)

ॐ नमो भगवते वासुदेवाय नमः

[thewertsearch]

Familial Determinism

Or: let's make wild, uninformed guesses about the troll Ancestors, based solely on the lives of their descendants!

As a bearer of the lowest blood on the hemospectrum, Aradia’s ancestor was probably as poor as she is. She may have been an archeologist like her descendant, assuming the field existed in her era, but I'm much more interested in her potential necromancy.

On the instruction of your ANCESTORS, you have recovered MYSTERIOUS TECHNOLOGY from the ruins, and convinced a friend to adapt it into a GAME THAT WILL BRING ABOUT THE DESTRUCTION OF YOUR CIVILIZATION.

See, due to her bloodline, Granny Megido is the most likely ancestor to be behind the Voices. She's the only one who can claim a direct relationship to Aradia, and I think she was probably still around in the modern era - as a ghost, of course - guiding her young protege, as she worked to trigger the apocalypse.

What's your story, Granny Meg? How did a lowblood medium discover the secrets of Sgrub, centuries before it arrived? How much did you know back then - and how much influence do you still have, even now?

If Alternia's past is anything like its present - and it certainly seems to be - then I can't see Tavros's ancestor surviving there for long. If he survived to adulthood, then it was probably as a peaceful nomad, or perhaps some sort of ranger.

Either way, I don't think he'd involve himself with other trolls, instead preferring to spend time with his planet's wildlife. Basically, I'm picturing Snow White with a mohawk.

Sollux’s ancestor is undoubtedly still a techhead. I know it's centuries in the past, but this is proto-Sollux we're talking about. He'd invent technology if he had to.

Actually, that might have been his role. He could have been one of Alternia's first engineers, leveraging his Sgrub foreknowledge to contribute to Alternia's technological advancement.

Congratulations, Sollux Senior - you helped turn a nation of pirates into a space empire.

Karkat's an interesting one. In a more primitive society - ie, one without Imperial Drones - it might have been easier for him to hide his blood color.

...actually, he might not even have Karkat's blood color. It's possible that Karkat's candy red mutation is unique to him, and the other Vantas has yellow-green blood, like his Trollian position implies he should. That would result in an ancestor with a very different social position to Karkat, and the two could be substantially different as a result.

Nepeta’s current lifestyle would translate perfectly to a primitive Alternia. Her ancestor could easily still live in a cave – and since shipping is probably her calling, too, I'm picturing her as an accomplished matchmaker.

Kanaya’s situation is rather unique. Jadebloods are rare, and inextricably linked to the Mother Grub, so her ancestor has some of the strongest ties to her counterpart.

We're actually aware of an ancient Mother Grub, who may have been alive in the time of the ancestors - which hints at a relationship between Kanaya's ancestor and the next troll on our list.

That would be Terezi's ancestor, whose symbol adorns the Doomsday Scale. This device was probably a collaboration between the Pyrope and Maryam ancestors. Its purpose is unknown, but the Gate symbol is proof that someone had Sgrub foreknowledge. Curious.

Anyway, aside from this side hustle, Pyrope was probably a legislacerator. I wonder if the Alternian legal system was as broken then as it is now?

Equius... well, I don't really know, actually. He certainly feels like the kind of guy who’d model himself off his ancestor, so he was probably a pro-hemospectrum horse enthusiast.

Gamzee’s ancestor could have gone one of two ways. If Sopor Slime existed back in early Alternia, he might have been as docile as his descendant used to be. If it didn’t, he was probably the exact kind of bloodthirsty monster that Gamzee is currently regressing into.

I know which option I'm putting my money on, and it's the one that would make Gamzee proud of his 'Subjugglator' ancestors. Can you guess which?

Eridan’s ancestor is the Orphaner, which makes me think he has a similar role as a slayer of lusi. My best guess is that he killed the custodians of adult trolls.

Feferi is an odd case, because her ancestor would probably be an extremely famous historical empress. Fuchsia blood is so rare that Feferi is literally the only modern troll who has it, so I wouldn't be surprised if her ancestor was revered in her time.

What did you do to Alternia, Pexies? Did you help make it what it is, or - like your descendant - did you try to make it better?

[mionkings]

GRAVITY FALLS SPOILERS MAYBE? FOR THISISNOTAWEBSITEDOTCOM.COM — AT LEAST WITH BILL CIPHER AND STAN PINES/GRUNKLE

This involves thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com and Bill's PTSD involving Stan along with a theory of Bill Cipher possibly still in Grunkle Stan's mind.

So I've been seeing some people concerned over the idea that Bill Cipher hasn't left Stan's mind at least not fully, and while I do also have some belief that maybe some remnant is still there—perhaps it's just Bill's remains left behind all while his soul is trapped in Theraprism.

But the idea that Bill still has access to Stan like before, nah.

In reality; I highly doubt it, it feels just like at the end of The Book of Bill: where Bill snaps over the mere idea that Stanley must've influenced the reader not to join him, just him viscerally screaming out Grunkle Stan's name— resulting with Bill in the void swearing that someone will let him out.

Bill Cipher is labeled with Max Security Rec in the Theraprism, that implies that he's clearly being watched even if they had this one 'slip up' with the Book of Bill. They still hold more power over him since they confiscate his book after five minutes :)

To me, it feels like he's lashing out now—Bill is now what he considers his lowest and is raging at Stanley for not only beating him, for being a cheaper version of Sixer, but for also being happy. To me: Bill is desperate; he's trying to plant doubt that they fully purged him from Stan's mind in which I highly doubt that either the Axolotl or the Theraprism wouldn't notice.

—

But we'll see what happens if any updates come again, maybe I'm wrong and Bill isn't truly gone from the Pines Family 🤷‍♀️ but from what we've been seeing, Bill is grasping at straws now and clearly he's mad that he underestimated Grunkle Stan lmao get rekt loser

[bouquetface]

Bang Chan - Vedic Chart Analysis

Per request. This uses the birth time of 8:54 PM.

I hope everyone just takes this as fun. I do not mean any disrespect in making assumptions. Ofc I do not know him or his life. I wish him the best. Please take it as entertainment.

🍀 if you have some of the same placements this post may be insightful for you.

Romantic Relationships:

Venus conjunct Mars in Scorpio 7th H - This strongly indicates marrying someone you have encountered in the past. He will have met or been near his spouse at least once before properly meeting. The times prior they would have been unable to get close for some reason.

Real life example: I have seen this as a person who went to the same vet school as their spouse but they never encountered one another. They were too focused on their studies to even care about meeting someone.

In Bang Chan’s case, this may be someone he encountered during his travels and/or through his work life. His future spouse and him currently may have mutual friends or acquaintances. They may have seen or heard about the other in a causal way.

The area they meet in will be a busy area - like downtown or simply people are around them. This conjunction shows the couple meets in an area close to their home - this is due to Venus being in its natural home ( the 7th house). They may even discover they live very close to one another. There is some sense of familiarity in regard to meeting. He has been to the location before.

It will be up to him to approach her directly. While she is an independent and go-getter type, she won’t make the first move.

Venus holds the lowest degree. This shows someone who makes bold moves without being aggressive. He is likely dominating and assertive in relationships. He will not come off as aggressive doing this since Venus controls this conjunction. While he is comfortable leading, he doesn’t desire a partner to be completely submissive either. After marriage, his spouse will be someone who dominates/leads the marriage. This doesn’t mean it has to be a negative scenario - he may appreciate the responsibility being taken off his shoulders.

There often isn’t a balance of who is leading/dominating and who is following/submissive. It can constantly change throughout their relationship.

His spouse has a fiery nature. The good side to this is she will fight for the marriage and for him (Mars’s influence). She is somewhat possessive and he’ll prolly like it tbh. There can be constant passion and friction throughout the relationship. The intensity is unlikely to ever die down. The two are always at least physically attracted to one another even when fighting. Strong sexual energy.

Venus in Vishakha indicates a very beautiful spouse. Yet, his spouse is likely to still experience jealously. Ofc everyone does but for his partner this is to a greater extent - it can be more intense of a feeling or possibly a constant feeling. Her emotional and sensitive nature can lead to anger and arguments. She can be very stubborn. She does not back down easily. He can like this about her but be frustrated by her at the same time. There is a pull and push to their dynamic.

She is likely highly accomplished. This is due to the nakshatra’s influence - it shows overcoming hardships, obstacles & defeating enemies. She may have undergone experiences of feeling betrayed or discriminated against resulting in an independent and bold personality. She does not trust or follow anyone easily. She may desire he makes it clear that he is with her.

She may be very concerned with her appearance. She is likely active. She may have interest in fashion. She’ll likely have a good style and/or have beautiful features.

Specific Appearance of Spouse:

Venus DK & 7th H Ruler (Mars) in Scorpio indicates: A pale or lighter skin toned partner. Scorpio indicates medium height, Mars shows shorter height. She may be medium to short height.

Venus conjunct Mars indicates the spouse has or gets a mark on them. Birth mark, scar, acne, burn, etc. This can even indicate she ends up having a c-section - results in a surgery scar. & sometimes this can show someone undergoes or has undergone cosmetic surgery.

Either way she will be stunning as Venus is in 7th H and Venus is the DK planet. & because Venus is his 1st house ruler in 7th, he may look similar to his spouse or personality-wise he becomes similar to the spouse.

Her career: She could become an entrepreneur. She may model. Her work involves movement, diplomacy/charming & possibly design/aesthetics. She may act. She may have multiple sources of income and/or tried multiple career paths.

6th house ruler (Venus) in 7th house indicates the spouse is constantly dealing with obstacles in life. In worst case scenario, this can indicate a spouse who eventually is diagnosed with a serious illness. In other cases, it can be the spouse’s work or family life that causes a lot of stress & responsibilities. He may desire to swoop in and save/protect the spouse from these troubles.

Essentially, the spouse is bringing 6th house topics (debt, struggle, court issues, illness, pets, other responsibilities) into married life. This doesn’t often occur instantly after marriage - not much of this post will - this is later into married life. It doesn’t have to be overly negative either. For example: A short period of struggle as the spouse later deals with a lawsuit in their life. OR even simply the spouse brings pets into the marriage - extra responsibility - but not bad at all.

Venus DK and Saturn AK are friendly planets to one another. This indicates a bond built on mutual friendship not just physical attraction. They have the ability to work together to resolve any issues that come their way. Venus conjunct Mars shows they can count on one another supporting them through anything.

Ride or die - not in a toxic sense tho as Saturn AK brings in a sense of maturity. And his Mars aspect to Mercury shows logical decision making before taking action.

He’ll have a distant relationship with his spouse’s family - specifically his father in law. The relationship will be formal, polite but distant.

He doesn’t have strong divorce indicators. However, in D9 he does have Rahu in 7th, the ruler of this Rahu is Mars in 5th house. Truthfully, this can indicate affairs. Yet, no strong divorce indicators showing these thoughts may not be acted on. And if they were, the couple could decide to remain together to work on their marriage.

Timing Based on SR:

2023-2025 - During this time, it seem someone could have caught his attention However, it seems unlikely to go further. Specifically in 2025, the connection would be unstable. His focus is divided. He may find it better to detach from any romantic connection he may be involved in.

May 2027 - Sept 2028 - This seems prominent for the birth/creation of something new. There could be some shocking developments in his personal life. This won’t be something small, it’ll leave an impact on him. He could experience a lot of romance and passion - which is likely to feel both exciting and frustrating. However, this could be a creative project that he has an idea for/works on.

He may suddenly decide to move or make another change to his home life.

2028-2029 - This when he’ll have adjusted to the newness and change. If he is working on creating something in 2027-2028, then in 2028-2029 the project is completed. The 5th house is more than just romance, it’s creation - creation of art, creation of children, performance, + more. So it’s unclear if this is a start of a relationship or birth of a creative project or simply working and casually having fun.

2029-2030 - He could potentially marry in 2030. Jupiter and NN will transit his 7th, Saturn will aspect his 7th from 1st. This is his Rahu bhutki period, if he did marry this year there are likely many tests for this marriage later.

Late 2034 - Early 2035 - Specifically January 15th would be a good time for marriage but will he actually marry this exact date? prolly not.

Personality:

Sun in virgo indicates he is very hardworking. He desires control and perfection. His routine is likely very important to him. His Moon in 6th house emphasizes the importance of routine on his health.

Moon in Libra shows a natural diplomat. He sees both sides. He desires peace and balance. This Moon paired with Jupiter in 9th shows a great leader. They can understand and motivate people when they are at their lowest. He has a balance - he isn’t an enabler nor will he do tough love to an extreme. This shows someone who is good at business - both the social aspect and the actual commitment to work.

Chitra is considered the architect - They have a good eye for design. They often like photography - examples: have scrapbooks, photography is a hobby, purchase other artist’s photos, many personal photos around the home, coffee table book of photos, etc. Due to the ruler Venus in 7th H, this can indicate the spouse has these traits instead.

Libra Moon in 6th shows being well-groomed and having good hygiene is very important to them. This is one way their desire for routine can appear - being religious about their skin care routine, gym routine, etc. His mom may be like this too. She could enjoy having a healthy routine and taking care of her appearance.

Saturn Atmakaraka in 11th house shows it is his purpose to provide service for the masses. In Pisces, it indicates it’s through art and imagination. He could eventually speak on politics - for example he shows support for same-sex couples. He shows support for other groups of people who are often discriminated against.

[atheistcartoons]

“Of all the animosities which have existed among mankind, those which are caused by a difference of sentiments in religion appear to be the most inveterate and distressing, and ought to be deprecated. I was in hopes that the enlightened and liberal policy, which has marked the present age, would at least have reconciled Christians of every denomination so far that we should never again see the religious disputes carried to such a pitch as to endanger the peace of society.”

George Washington in a letter to Edward Newenham, October 20, 1792.

“History, I believe, furnishes no example of a priest-ridden people maintaining a free civil government. This marks the lowest grade of ignorance of which their civil as well as religious leaders will always avail themselves for their own purposes.”

Thomas Jefferson in a letter to Alexander von Humboldt, December 6, 1813.

“The civil government functions with complete success by the total separation of the Church from the State.”

James Madison, 1819.

“And I have no doubt that every new example will succeed, as every past one has done, in shewing that religion & Govt will both exist in greater purity, the less they are mixed together.”

James Madison in a letter to Edward Livingston, July 10, 1822.

“Every new and successful example of a perfect separation between ecclesiastical and civil matters is of importance.”

James Madison, 1822.

“When a religion is good, I conceive it will support itself; and when it does not support itself, and God does not take care to support it so that its professors are obligated to call for help of the civil power, it’s a sign, I apprehend, of its being a bad one.”

Benjamin Franklin in a letter to Richard Price, October 9, 1780.

“As I understand the Christian religion, it was, and is, a revelation. But how has it happened that millions of fables, tales, legends, have been blended with both Jewish and Christian revelation that have made them the most bloody religion that ever existed?”

John Adams in a letter to F.A. Van der Kamp, Dec. 27, 1816.

“What influence, in fact, have ecclesiastical establishments had on society? In some instances they have been seen to erect a spiritual tyranny on the ruins of the civil authority; on many instances they have been seen upholding the thrones of political tyranny; in no instance have they been the guardians of the liberties of the people. Rulers who wish to subvert the public liberty may have found an established clergy convenient auxiliaries. A just government, instituted to secure and perpetuate it, needs them not.”

James Madison in “A Memorial and Remonstrance”, 1785.

“Congress has no power to make any religious establishments.”

Roger Sherman, Congress, August 19, 1789.

“We have abundant reason to rejoice that in this Land the light of truth and reason has triumphed over the power of bigotry and superstition. In this enlightened Age and in this Land of equal liberty it is our boast, that a man’s religious tenets will not forfeit the protection of the Laws, nor deprive him of the right of attaining and holding the highest Offices that are known in the United States.”

George Washington in a letter to the members of the New Church in Baltimore, January 27, 1793.

“This would be the best of all possible worlds, if there were no religion in it.”

John Adams.

“Christianity neither is, nor ever was a part of the common law.”

Thomas Jefferson in a letter to Dr. Thomas Cooper, February 10, 1814.

“Ecclesiastical establishments tend to great ignorance and corruption, all of which facilitate the execution of mischievous projects.”

James Madison.

“The purpose of separation of church and state is to keep forever from these shores the ceaseless strife that has soaked the soil of Europe in blood for centuries.”

James Madison in an 1803 letter.

”I am for freedom of religion and against all maneuvers to bring about a legal ascendancy of one sect over another.”

Thomas Jefferson in a letter to Elbridge Gerry, January 26, 1799.

“Of all the tyrannies that affect mankind, tyranny in religion is the worst.”

Thomas Paine.

“I wish [Christianity] were more productive of good works … I mean real good works … not holy-day keeping, sermon-hearing … or making long prayers, filled with flatteries and compliments despised by wise men, and much less capable of pleasing the Deity.”

Benjamin Franklin in Works, Vol. VII, p. 75.

[thatbitchery]

'Power' and 'power hungry' are those words that we have demonized and sacrificed to spread the level down propaganda that's egalitarianism and anti- hierarchy, when power is not only inbuilt meaning we all seek it but extremely important and useful to life.

Power is the ability to influence the outcome, perception and course of events. People that have power are people that have- control or at least influence over lives, theirs or otherwise. Lack of power is the most painful position one can be in- exhibit A your childhood if you had one of those parents. Lack of power power leads to slavery, bring under dictatorship, resentment, self loathing, humiliation, shame, etc. The most painful position you can be in is one where you Lack power over yourself.

Neitzsche (I can never correctly spell his name) insists that power over yourself is the most important form of power, and that a good life is a life spent garnering and exercising power over yourself. Power over yourself is simply- discipline. When your will is stronger than your impulses and urges and wants- when you're disciplined- then you have achieved the highest form of power in existence- which makes this the first point. An easy way to be powerful is to be disciplined.

Power over others, however , is just as important. As social species we are constantly in need of company, in fact isolation is a death- to be at the mercy of others is also a death. Since as a social species we are dependent on each other for survival it is important to have some level of power over others- we are also animals and people will naturally treat you at the lowest level they can- it's important to make this level as high as possible.

So then, some cheap / completely free easy to do ways to be powerful?

Articulation and eloquence. Jordan Peterson says the most dangerous thing a person can be is to be articulate and eloquent. Why? Because words are the most powerful weapon out there. Everything social happens through words , and it's a social species so do the math. Wars have been declared and ended over and through words. Relationships formed and destroyed. Governments created and disbanded- words. In my religion save for human beings Everything was created by words- its that powerful. The most powerful you can be is articulate. The way you speak- from your surface lexicon to your intonation to the speed you use to your accent- people judge you over this. It influences how people treat you and think of you. It's soft power that's also explosive. Increase your surface lexicon. Get rid of your original accent and get one that people either a) find superior or b) commonplace ie most people have it (fun fact before skin color and origin we assess each other on accent basis and subconsciously decode if we like you or not. Explanation: people in the same tribe have the same accent , so consider eo brothers and safe. Strangers, not so much). Learn to pace your words. Be straightforward and open. Which drives me to point two

Honesty and authenticity. Look , I think you should lie. Manipulate girl boss gatekeep - these require lying at some point- go for it. What's more powerful, though, is to learn to ger what you want by manipulating the truth. You know what they say- the truth will set you free. Here's the problem with lying- we can tell. There are tells and subconsciously cues that your body sends when you lie and we subconsciously detect them and when you're caught in one lie it destroys your credibility all round. It's like a castle of jenga falling apart, everything that was once in harmony just- trips over. Credibility is the backbone of all relationships- you lose that you get isolated. Honesty is such a powerful tool because a) its vulnerable b) it signals confidence c) it builds trust d) the gift of companionship- you meet people that can actually relate e) you don't need to remember too much or always hold up a facade, the truth will set you free f) it's such an idgaf move that makes you seem superior especially if it's something you'd get judged harshly on. Just- be truthful- I've given f ways in which it influences how people treat you. The trick here is to do the mystery thing- keep things to yourself, unlearn your need to overexplain or justify, learn to give vague, short and true answers and when in doubt, cry.

Knowledge is power- what more must I add. Read. Keep up with the economics and government politics. Learn personal finance and build a financial base. Read fiction. Listen to podcasts. Be informed. Know the things that matter, and no that isn't drake X Kendrick Lamar it's things that matter. Get good grades and hold, at the very least, a bachelor's. Watch movies and go to the opera. Subscribe to newsletter. Be informed. Know. Knowledge is power. Join training camps and whatnots. Be skilled and efficient.

Networks. Power is stored in webs and security is in numbers. Exhibit a) try attack someone with a strong fan base see how that goes for you. You want to be powerful? Have friends, and not just friends. Powerful friends. I don't mean a team of CEOs necessarily- loyalty at the top is tricky and unless you're also a CEO that might not be easy- I mean people that can influence the turn of events. Sometimes- like in fandoms- it's simply just, people. Who your networks are made up of is dependent on what you want- as long as you keep in mind security is in numbers. Run up your numbers, ma'am. Forget your introvercy and self isolation methods , leave your house and learn to talk to people and run up your numbers. The most powerful you can be, is to get to a point where a) you have numbers on every level b)you have a cult leader like presence- that people worship you and are willing to die for you. Like most celebrities do. That's security, that's power. If you have a Nicki Minaj level fan base people treat you well because if they don't your fans will tear them apart. & you can get away with anything because they will justify it for you.

Grooming and mannerisms. We- inclusive of you- judge our books by their covers. Before you speak your Grooming and your etiquette speak for you. That's, I'm not explaining this. I know you know.

START HERE

[readytoescalate]

"EMORY IS EVERYWHERE": AN OPEN INVITATION FROM PROTESTORS OCCUPYING EMORY UNIVERSITY

As the Palestine Solidarity movement rips across college campuses, college administrators and government bureaucrats are rushing to denounce anyone taking action as an “outside agitator”. Those who grease the gears of the war machine think that this rhetoric will erode public support for bold actions at Emory. They are wrong. 45 years after the Camp David Accords - an infamously botched, imperialist plan for peace between Israel and Egypt with no input from Palestinians - was orchestrated by an Emory faculty alum President Carter, we observe that there is nowhere on Earth “outside” of Emory University. We want to say as clearly as possible - we welcome “outside agitators” to our struggle against the ruthless genocide of Palestinians. Emory University has the highest tuition, the lowest acceptance rate, and by far the highest endowment of any institution in Georgia. Economic barriers, infamously racist standardized testing, and nepotism have barred many from studying at Emory. To students in Atlanta and beyond - we invite you to struggle with us. Local high school students dream of attending Emory, and many teachers encourage them to study hard and take up extracurriculars to increase their chance acceptance, knowing their chance of admission is slim. To local high school students and teachers, we invite you to struggle with us. Just down the street from Emory Hospital Midtown is the site of the former Peachtree-Pine homeless shelter. In a bid to gentrify the city and evict its houseless population, the City closed the shelter and did not replace it, displacing hundreds and cutting off a last line of support for thousands of poor people in the city. Emory University purchased this building, just one example of Emory’s contribution to gentrification in Atlanta. To those without homes, or those displaced by gentrification, we invite you to struggle with us. Emory’s $11 billion endowment, the 11th highest in the country, is an outsized influence in Atlanta’s economy. While economic inequality widens in the city, Emory remains a bastion of the rich. To the restaurant workers, house cleaners, gig workers, and all proletarians - we invite you to struggle with us. In 2020, Emory University laied off or furloughed over 1500 employees. To those who are no longer affiliated with the university - we invite you to struggle with us. 4 out of 5 students at Emory are not from Georgia. While the Freedom Riders were heading down to Georgia in the 1960’s to fight for Black people’s right to vote, segregationist governors cast them as “outside agitators”. To those from outside Atlanta and Georgia, we invite you to struggle with us. 1 in 5 students at Emory are from outside of the United States. The Palestinian students murdered by American weapons under Biden will never be one of those students. To those from outside of the country, we invite you to struggle with us. In April 2023, Emory admin called the police to break up a protest led by students against Cop City on the quad. None of the pigs were Emory students. To all of those who struggle against police brutality, we invite you to struggle with us. EMORY IS EVERYWHERE. THE PLACE FOR DIVISION IS NOWHERE. WE INVITE YOU TO STRUGGLE WITH US.

[talonabraxas]

Atu II - The High Priestess Talon Abraxas

The card refers to the Moon. The Moon (being the general feminine symbol, the symbol of the second order corresponding to the Sun as the Yoni does to the Lingam) is universal, and goes from the highest to the lowest. It is a symbol which will recur frequently in these hieroglyphs. But in the earlier Trumps the concern is with Nature above the Abyss; the High Priestess is the first card which connects the Supernal Triad with the Hexad; and her path, as shown in the diagram, makes a direct connection between the Father in his highest aspect, and the Son in his most perfect manifestation. This path is in exact balance in the middle pillar. There is here, therefore, the purest and most exalted conception of the Moon. (At the other end of the scale is Atu XVIII, q.v.)

The card represents the most spiritual form of Isis the Eternal Virgin; the Artemis of the Greeks. She is clothed only in the luminous veil of light. It is important for high initiation to regard Light not as the perfect manifestation of the Eternal Spirit, but rather as the veil which hides that Spirit It does so all the more effectively because of its incomparably dazzling brilliance.

[The tradition of the best schools of Hindu mysticism has a precise parallelism. The final obstacle to full Enlightenment is exactly this Vision of Formless Effulgence].

Thus she is light and the body of light. She is the truth behind the veil of light. She is the soul of light. Upon her knees is the bow of Artemis, which is also a musical instrument, for she is huntress, and hunts by enchantment.

Now, regard this idea as from behind the Veil of Light, the third Veil of the original Nothing. This light is the menstruum of manifestation, the goddess Nuith, the possibility of Form. This first and most spiritual manifestation of the feminine takes to itself a masculine correlative, by formulating in itself any geometrical point from which to contemplate possibility. This virginal goddess is then potentially the goddess of fertility. She is the idea behind all form; as soon as the influence of the triad descends below the Abyss, there is the completion of concrete idea.

The following chapter of the Book of Lies (falsely so-called), may assist the student to understand this doctrine by dint of meditation:

DUST DEVILS

In the Wind of the mind arises the turbulence called I.

It breaks; down shower the barren thoughts.

All life is choked.

This desert is the Abyss wherein is the Universe.

The Stars are but thistles in that waste.

Yet this desert is but one spot accurséd in a world of bliss. Now and again Travellers cross the desert; they come from the Great Sea, and to the Great Sea they go.

And as they go they spill water; one day they will irrigate the desert, till it flower.

See! Five footprints of a Camel! V.V.V.V.V.

[bloop-bl00p]

Rewriting Hellaverse Heaven

Welcome to Heaven

We all know that Vivienne's worldbuilding skills are terrible, I’ve been pointing out a few issues so it’s not a new concept. I don’t want her to butcher Heaven in the second season, I know she will so I did something myself.

Anyway, I’ll start with the lowest in the hierarchy and gradually start climbing higher, it’s not 100% accurate to the angelic hierarchy we all know but where’s the fun in taking the accurate text without making any changes?

I. Humans:

Different ranks

Humans, while mostly there to rest after their death, can access more important ranks that are essential for Heavens to keep working. It’s based on how they lived on Earth.

Venerable: Venerable is the title given to a deceased person recognized as having lived a virtuous life, they sinned but it wasn't that bad and their good doing overcame their bad deeds. They are very common.

Blessed: To be beatified and recognized as Blessed, you must die because you accomplished a virtuous act based on the 7 Capital Virtues. A Blessed has the opportunity to assist a Saint in their daily routine and help welcome new souls in Heaven, making them visit different places and integrate them into the communities.

Saint: Sainthood requires a heroically virtuous and borderline sinless life, which means they dedicated their entire life to helping others and the world around them. A soul who accessed sainthood has the opportunity to further participate in the maintenance of Heaven. Saint Peter has the keys to open the Gates and knows which souls can have access to it.

The Choirs

Venerables can be part of a Choir since they have the most free time. The main style is currently Gospel and Acapella but Gospel Rock with Christian Symphonic Metal recently added themselves with new generations.

If I had to rewrite “Welcome to Heaven” it would probably be like “Gospel True” from Hercules.

II. Earthly Messengers

In other terms, those angels interact the most with humans whether it’s on Earth, in Heaven, or in Hell.

“Common” Angels

a. Overall:

That’s what they are called in the scripture and honestly, I was too tired to find another name. They are mostly pacifists avoiding confrontation and only carrying action and the words of God for the Greater Good. “Common” Angels take humans' appearance to blend in to spread good morals and values to inspire others.

They have to protect mortals from demonic influence, AKA identify and either repel the demon or slay it in extreme circumstances. They are my replacements for the Cherub in Helluva Boss and the reason IMP and other needs humans disguise.

b. Guardian Angels:

A guardian angel is assigned to protect and guide a particular person. You can't see them but their advice manifests as your internal monologue. It's up to you if you want to listen to it. They are the reason you think twice before willingly making bad decisions.

Principalities

If the “Common” Angels take care of individuals person, Principalities take care of kingdoms and large communities focusing mainly on the chiefs so they rule fairly over their people.

Unfortunately, most Principalities fell with Lucifer and the Fallen currently use their skills to manipulate rulers for the benefit of Hells.

Powers

a. Overall:

Powers heavily partake in Heaven’s army and it’s not rare to see them roaming around with a sword and armor, I mean, it’s their duty to protect the place. Once a year they descend to Hell in order to kill as many sinners as possible.

While it’s still a hazard as demons in general have varieties of powers that can make a fight difficult they do it nonetheless. During the war against Lucifer, their loyalty was such that no Powers fell which not only boosted their ego but also made them loathe those who turned against the Almighty.

Archangel Michael is the leader of the army but since Lucifer obliviously does not want the guy near Pentagram City Misael, his best soldier and lieutenant, takes the lead once in Hell.

b. Context around Exterminations:

The Examination was set up when Samael stopped torturing sinners and established a semblance of society to gain more power. Misael proposed it, not only to stop the Fallen Angel from harvesting strength but to regulate the number of souls in Hell. Which got accepted.

After each Extermination, soldiers have prayer duties where they need a few days to demand forgiveness after each extermination because of the arms procured.

Sinning gives more power to the Seven Deadly Sins, so each Power chooses their victims wisely specifically targeting sinners classified, in their own terms, as Overlords since they massively perpetuate immoral behaviors in others. They know exactly who targets thanks to Adam and Eve.

The first humans were sent to Hell because they doomed humanity except that not only did they keep their human appearance but they got a pardon from the wrath of Samael. Sealed away from the chaos of Hell, they stay in contact with Heaven and inform them of news deemed as important like the rise in power of a sinner.

III. Heavenly Rulers

While they rarely venture among humans, the actions they take can affect life on Earth.

The Archangels

The Archangels have been given the monumental task of managing life in Heaven for humans and the travel between Heaven and Earth/Hell. Each one of them has a different area of expertise translated by the etymology of their name.

They take care of the “Common” Angels and Power's activities making sure everything goes accordingly. They make sure everyone follows the rules, arresting/killing those that don't, and assigning the proper sentence when ordered to by God or the Dominions. They can be sent to Earth to deliver very important messages and are responsible for miracles, you know, people magically getting their visions back or limbs suddenly growing back, yeah, it’s them.

Dominions

Dominions rule over the Angels under them in the hierarchy, they monitor their activities making sure everything is fine. They solve arguments and grant intelligence with their immense wisdom and, like judges, give verdicts and penalties to criminals often helping God himself when faced with dilemmas, they were the ones who proposed the flood and helped God make his 10 Commandments.

The Ophamins

They are eyed wheels inside eyed wheels that contain fire whiting them, don’t try to visualize that.

Whenever Gods ask for a place to be blessed they will take the fire from them and spread it around making mere earthly houses holy. When that happens Hellborns (imps, succubus, or else) cannot approach these areas, unless they wanna die. You see this fire doesn't just repel sin it cleanses it completely and since Hellborn creatures are physical manifestations of sins they die the second they get close to the fire.

The fire is used to make angelic weapons.

IV. God’s Attendance

They can get physically close to the Almighty and help Him by carrying His orders or even replacing Him in some cases.

The Cherubims

Cherubims are armed with a sword whose warmth rivals the sun, it’s directly made from the fire of the Ophamin. One became the Guardian of Eden after Adam and Eve ate the Defended fruits (A pomegranate in my rewrite) Two also stand beside Saint Peter protecting the gates of Heaven.

Their duty is to protect sacred places, If God sends them to Earth it’s to protect a zone, Noah was asked to build the status of two Cherubim on his arch to ensure its protection, The same goes for Solomon who built temples with sculptures of Cherubim inside.

The Sheraphim

The closest to God physically, Seraphim cover their body with one of their three pairs of wings to not blind people and avoid outshining the Heavenly Father. Their love is so grand they burn, it doesn’t hurt them.

They essentially have endless creativity, not unlimited like God but pretty close, they helped him when creating the universe and its rules.

The Seven Holly Virtues

Uriel, Raphael, Michael, Saraquel, Gabriel, and Remiel.

Also called the Council of Seven, these angels are the most powerful of their type and take charge of Heaven when God is unavailable. Each of them represents a Virtue and they are the ones you’ll see when you’re dead.

Each evaluates your entire life before your eyes and decides whether you go to Hell or not, the process lasts a few seconds from your perspective, hence why you feel like your life flashes before your eyes.

V. More informations

1. Angelic weapons:

Their making always involves the fire of the Ophamins, whether it’s a literal flaming sword or used to melt metals. Ophamins are the only ones able to touch this divine fire, they are literally made from it, Angels above them can be hurted by it but they are allowed to have flaming weapons because of their much more important status and their experiences. Those below are given metallic weapons melted with the fire to give a tier of its properties but it’s less powerful, nonetheless, it is still effective against low-tier demons.

→ A flaming sword kills Angels (fallen or not).

→ A simple blade can only kill the offspring of the Goetia (in my rewrite the 72 Goestia are Fallen Angels that had children in Hell), Hellborns, and sinners.

2. What are they made of?:

Angels were created the second God asked for Light, as they are part of it. They have free will and autonomy but choose to serve their Creator as it seems like the most logical thing to do. They are sinless beings living in another plane of existence. Usually, when angels fall off of grace they shapeshift because they don’t want to be associated with Heaven, only taking a more “holly” appearance to trick humans.

This shapeshifting ability is flawed for both species because their natural eye colors cannot change. You know what they said “Eyes are the window of the soul.”

3. Morality and the importance of ethics:

Angels are moral beings and have free wills, they know ultimately what is really good and what is really wrong and that’s how they base their judgment upon humans.

There’s one flaw in this system, however.

They live in an alien-perfect environment. Everyone knows their place and carries their very specific duties, they don’t question rules because why would a perfect God would create imperfect rules? The last time someone tried to drastically change everything they lost a tier of their friends and witnessing what they are doing now reinforces that feeling that their sense of morality is ultimately right.

Ethics is many things and I still struggle to fully grasp what it is despite the little research I made, what I understand is that it helps in understanding people's behavior and giving fair judgments in court. What is morally wrong can be ethically right, there’s a huge difference between robbing a bank because you want to get rich and being a pickpocket because you have children to feed. Angels don't understand that, they don't understand humans and that’s why so many people end up in Hell without really deserving it.

4. These have nothing to do with the rewrite:

The way I suffered to write this is unreal. I have a bad habit of doing research and writing at the same time! Don’t be like me… because the number of time I had ideas and decided to scrap them because the results of my research made more sense makes me want to cry. I didn't but I was close.

You can also count me not saving my progress and accidentally closing Tumblr so I had to rewrite paragraphs. Anyway, the pain is over and I‘m glad the final result.

[back2bluesidex]

To Be Popular - JJK (18+) [Ch. 2 Preview]

↪ Patreon Membership Exclusive Series

↪ Pairing: Social Media Influencer! Jungkook X Marketing Manager! Reader ft. Yoongi

↪ Summary: You love everything about social media - apart from the ever-growing number of social media influencers. You don't understand how these people gain followers and admirers just by installing a camera and doing very basic things in front of it. And you despise how some of them can do anything to gain fame, to be popular - even if it includes uploading their bedroom scene in pornsites aka people like Jeon Jungkook.

But when your company launches a new product and your department head tasks you with signing Jeon Jungkook up as an endorsement partner - you have no choice but to chase him like the corporate slave that you are. However, things turn worse when you embroil in a dating rumor with him and have to keep the game going for the sake of everything.

is it really for the worse or things will turn in a way you never expected?  

↪ Theme: Strangers to lovers au, fake dating au, kind of enemies to lover au, angst, smut, fluff.

↪ A/N: This series will have 2k words per chapter and will be updated weekly. Hence, you can expect the first chapter sometime next week. Hope that you enjoy this one <3

Index: Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | ?

Read full Chapter on Patreon

Just a week ago you were scoffing at your laptop watching this guy make fame out of a porn video and now he is leading you god knows where to do god knows what. 

Before you could take in your surroundings, Jungkook slams you on the nearest wall. He wastes no time in locking you between his arms. 

“You really came here only to convince me? You had no other intention, huh?” He asks with the lowest possible voice. A shiver runs down through the path of your spine. 

“No. What intention would I even have? I fucked things up at the meeting so my superiors are making me clean the mess.” Your voice comes out firmer than what you thought you could manage. 

“Oh? Really? But I think there is something else to it.” Jungkook comes closer to your body. His chest touches yours. You take a sharp inhale but keep the eye-contact intact. 

Jungkook’s eyes dip down to your chest again as he continues, “you want what you watched in that video, don’t you?” he wets his lips once those vile words come out of his mouth. 

Your jaw hits the floor almost, “what the fuck? What makes you think I want you?” 

Jungkook invades whatever was left off of your personal space and whispers right into your ear, “If you accept it nicely, tell me the truth whether you got turned on or not, I will give your company a chance.”  

You gulp at his offer. 

If you say you were completely unaffected after watching him fucking his partner so well, then it will be a lie for sure. 

So… if you swallow your pride and tell him that he indeed had some kind of effect on you - he will be up for another meeting? 

“And what if I tell you the truth?” you question, looking deep into his chocolate eyes. All you see there is mirth. 

[fandomworld9728]

Random headcanons about the sins and their relationship with Luci and Charlie? Maybe Lilith too?

(Since there's no AU/fanfic attached to this, I'm going to assume you mean from the canon show. Since there isn't much that we know about Lilith I'm only going to do Lucifer & Charlie)

(Also, I'm sorry this took me so long to respond to!)

Beelzebub:

While not actually related, treats Lucifer like he's her precious baby brother

Is the only one who makes a drink strong enough to get Lucifer drunk (And finds any excuse to get him to get him totally wasted, loving how he finally relaxes and cuts loose)

Totally threw the baby shower when it was announced that Charlie was going to be born

The fun Aunt who tries to show Charlie how to have a good time (Especially with her being high strung like her father)

Sends the two lots of goodies from her Ring. Doubly so when she knows they've had a rough time/bad day

Helped get Charlie get ready for prom with Lucifer, Lilith & Asmodeus

Asmodeus:

Acts like the older brother/father figure to Lucifer

Always ready to wingman for Lucifer be it during his marriage to Lilith or after when Lucifer tells him he's ready to get back out there

Always keeps a table or two open at Ozzie's for Lucifer & Charlie just in case they wanna bring a date to the Lust Ring

Definitely tag teams with Beelzebub to help Charlie & Lucifer threw heart break and to dress them up for parties/special events

Most supportive of the Sins on the two Morningstars' crazy ideas (And often the voice of reason)

Mammon:

Used to be close to Lucifer until he ripped off Lulu World

While it is his Sin taking over, the other side of it is that he is very much the living embodiment of imitation is the sincerest form of flattery with Lucifer (He doesn't know how to properly express it and is heavily influenced by his Sin that he doesn't know how much damage he is actually causing) (Please someone smack some sense into this guy)

Absolutely loves Charlie to pieces and teaches her all his favorite tips and tricks of the trade

Easily breaks under Charlie's famous puppy dog eyes

Satan:

Is like that brother who looks for any reason to fight. Finding any excuse to punch Lucifer in his face (Mainly the face because he finds it amusing whenever Lucifer screams not the face)

Whenever Lucifer visits Wrath he greets him by using his lasso to capture and tie him up

Just loves bullying Lucifer in any way possible & complains about him 24/7 (Yet misses him when he doesn't visit)

Despite his willingness to cause harm to Lucifer, he would lay down his life for him and especially for Charlie

Was the one who taught Charlie who to control her emotions so her demonic form & magic didn't go haywire

Feels most at peace whenever he's around Charlie. Something about her sooths his Sin

Leviathan:

Sees Lucifer more like a father than a brother

Uses his hypno-eyes as a form of hypnotherapy on Lucifer when he's at his lowest

Envious (shocker I know) of how much Lucifer loves Charlie

Despite that he very much loves Charlie like she was his younger sister

Belphegor:

Lucifer is her favorite patient since he only ever comes in for sleeping pills (when he finally took her advance to use them for his shitty sleep schedule

Will sometimes just appear in Lucifer or Charlie's bed and have what she calls a Nap Party or Group Nap

Only goes to parties at Beelzebub's when Lucifer drags her (no she doesn't have favorites) (even though she totally does and it's him)

Is Charlie's only doctor and will accept nothing else on the matter

Was the one who delivered Charlie when she was born

[turbulentscrawl]

Identity(V) Headcanons: Victor Grantz

Don't mind me, I just love him

-Victor’s biggest struggle in life is his crippling social anxiety. He’s a kind-hearted individual with a lot of empathy, but he’s deeply wounded by the pattern of abandonment he’s had in life (his mother, his uncle, any friends he made in school…) and as a result he’s one of the slowest in the manor to give true trust. He’s terrified of letting people in just to be abandoned again, and he doesn’t trust spoken words easily, so he simply avoids meeting people directly as much as possible. Promises, especially, make him feel gut-wrenching distrust for the one making them.

-(That said, Victor views keeping secrets as a promise of his own. One that others may not know he’s keeping, but a promise for their privacy nonetheless.)

-He believes people are more authentic when they don’t know they’re being observed, be it in-person or on paper. Victor doesn’t trust himself to accurately read someone’s tone or body language up close anymore—he becomes blinded by fear, and sometimes hope, so he takes things at face value even if it’s to his detriment--but he’s good at reading between written lines and gauging things from a distance. In this sense, he’s a decent judge of character. He’s a people-watcher both for enjoyment and to build himself a sense of security around others. (Though, sometimes this leads people to think he’s a bit of a creep, which makes him feel terrible.)

-All that said, Victor does not wish harm on anyone. He’s afraid of cruelty, not just for himself, but for anyone. And this is where his empathy comes in—he really, truly wants for the world and the people in it to be better. If he thinks there’s a chance of helping someone improve, he’s willing to help. If he thinks there’s a chance of saving someone from a painful death in a match…he’s willing to risk himself to see them through. He has some of the lowest pain tolerance in the manor, which is especially surprising to learn when you consider he’s among the most willing to rush into danger to help someone. (I mean he ran into a burning building to save a dog....)

-Ironically, Victor is very big on communication in the relationships he does build. When he finally gets close with someone, he’s not keen on losing them to misunderstanding or misplaced expectations, so he needs an open line—and patience—at all times. He still prefers letters to face-to-face conversation, however, so serious conversations can take a long time to sort through. (This goes for a modern setting, too. I know people think texting can be disingenuous, but Victor gets too stressed with face-to-face conversations and he prefers to have the time to think over and give a thought-out response that isn’t influenced by anxiety or fear.)

-He’s fit from all his walking, but doesn’t have much in the way of muscle. In fact, he’s on the soft side, especially in his arms and stomach area. He makes for a very cozy cuddle buddy, and he’s honestly one of the best huggers in the manor. (If he’s comfortable with the person, that is.)

-Personally, I feel like he’d be bit of a foodie. He’s not a picky eater and always happy to try new foods. (Though, while he doesn’t restrict himself from meat, he prefers fruit & veg.) If whatever he’s eating is dog-safe, he also likes to share bits and pieces of stuff with Wick.

-His preferred Love Languages to give are Acts of Service and Quality Time. To receive, he likes Words of Affirmation and Quality Time. In short, he wants to spend as much time with his loved ones as he possibly can. He doesn’t need you to do things for him because he’s used to taking care of himself, but he does like to receive sweet words (verbal or written) so he knows how much you love and value him! (That may sound counterintuitive given his suspicion for promises and sweet words…but by the time you’re close enough for love languages to matter, he’s gotten over most of those hurdles with you.)

-He’s a bit of a goofball! He’s anxious enough that it doesn’t come out for most people, but he does enjoy a good, silly time. He gets along well with Memory and Emma, for example.

-Victor talks with Wick a lot. Not out loud, or even in writing, just in his head. Social anxiety can get lonely, and having a cute doggy face to put half of his internal dialogue to helps bury those feelings…at least for a little while.

[wheelie-sick]

-> TW for in depth discussion of suicide <-

a lot of people look at anti psychiatry and say "well these aspects of psychiatry helped/saved my life!" and that's not the point. the point isn't that no one can ever find psychiatry helpful the point is that the system abuses its patients

I have been uncontrollably suicidal at many points in my life but 3 stick out to me and those 3 were my full suicide attempts (rather than my suicide near attempts i.e standing at the ledge of a cliff with the intent to jump, something I have done so many times I cannot possibly count them) I have been so desperate to die that despite having every possible lethal mean removed from the house I lived in I tried to drown myself in a bathtub. I tried this twice. there is nothing more desperate than frantically shoving your head under the water face down hoping you have the willpower to stay there until you black out and inevitably die. I remember these things viscerally and painfully. suicide is not unfamiliar to me.

but no one could have forced my recovery. recovery is a decision I had to consciously make. trying to force my hand would only have traumatized me further. I am all too familiar with forced recovery, I have been in ABA therapy against my will and had an awful experience. I would sob and beg to leave the system. I was in ABA partially because my mental illness was classified as severe, not just because I had moderate autism. my family admits a large driver of it was the fact that the support I was receiving from my incompetent therapist was not helping and they hoped ABA would. in the end it only made me worse by providing me more trauma on top of the existing trauma I already had.

with that said full recovery is something I will never experience but that does not mean I cannot be supported in ways that do not remove my personhood. I am bipolar, bipolar disorder is lifelong. it has been one of the main contributors to my suicide attempts as it started creeping into my life at 10 years old. I have, since my last suicide attempt, strongly considered trying again. there were points where I considered willingly going to a psychiatric hospital. something pushed me away- both from the ledge and from a psychiatric hospital.

there's a theme with when all my suicide attempts happened. my first was at the age of 12 and my last was at the age of 14. I was isolated. I was living with an incredibly abusive father and a mom who just couldn't keep up. I had very few to no friends. around 14 I started to gain community and mend the relationship with my mom. I had support. my latest near miss was only a couple of months ago, it was during a manic episode and the impulse arose and I barely had the self control to stop it. manic episodes are when bipolar people are at greatest risk of suicide. again, what saved me was having support. people saw what was going on and intervened- not through hospitalization against my will but through peer to peer support.

a psychiatric hospital would not have helped me. psychiatric hospitals are traumatizing experiences. trauma is a large influence on my life as is. the trauma of going to a psychiatric hospital outweighed the danger of me at my lowest staring at a bottle of opioids with intent to take them.

the thing about anti psychiatry is that it's not anti treatment it's anti abuse. if there was an alternative to psychiatric hospitals that did not revoke my autonomy, that would not have traumatized me, I would have gone. I don't believe that live-in alternatives are the answer for everyone, it looks different for different people, but I do believe everyone has a right to autonomy in their treatment.

I am happy I am alive and I am happy I survived my attempts but what I needed was not a traumatic experience at a psychiatric hospital what I needed was support that respected my autonomy and personhood.

a lot of people assume that anti psychiatry people just don't understand the experience of mental illness but I'd argue the contrary- most of us are classified as "seriously mentally ill" and most of us have become anti psychiatry through negative experiences with the psychiatric industry. we want autonomy for mentally ill people, not abandonment.