#love how i got decent images for kara and. the other guy

[reinabeestudio]

what the fuck does this say about me

[captaincartervalues]

My Stubborn Alien (for the fic title thing)

“Jus truuusst me, Lena thi- thisis a greaaat idea!” Kara empathically waves her hands.

“Kara, you’re drunk and this is most definitely not a good idea.” Lena replies matter of factly.

“Imnot drunk. Yooou’re drunk.”

Lena shakes her head at her girlfriend in exasperation.

“N Ssure it is! S’its what the peeople want. ANd it’s gunna be gREAt for ma image! No more ‘Oh Supergirl’s sooo uptight’ or ‘Oh Supergirl is toooo muchofa goodie tooshoes’ or ‘out of touch with the people’!” Kara airquotes.

Lena raises her eyebrows and tries to conceal her smirk.

“Imma be hip! Imma be wit da people, LenAa!” Kara reaches out to boop Lena’s nose as she’s making her last point. “Supergirl is CoOl Ssupergurl is sFun! Thhiss is gonna show everyone that. Okay? Okay.”

“Does this have something to do with the article Andrea had William publish this week?” Lena asks gently.

“NooOoo.”

“So this has nothing to do with her saying Supergirl isn’t the kind of hero you wanna have a drink with?” Lena presses.

“Uhh noo.” Kara insists defiantly. “It’s about the gAys!” Kara comes up with.

“What?” Lena laughs out.

“Nia said Tiktok is on the rage and the gays love it! And I wannabe something the gays love toooo” Kara points out.

“Darling, I’m pretty sure the gays already love you...”

“Yeeaaaahh BUT do they knooow I love them back?! Isdunno... Isss why I need Tikstok!” Kara exclaims as if her reasoning is flawless.

Lena looks at the innocent face on her drunk girlfriend and knows they’re going to be in trouble tomorrow. “There’s no talking you out of this right now, is there?”

“NOpe!” Kara smiles triumphantly.

Lena sighs as she acquiesces “Fine.”

Kara jumps up and down with exuberance.

“But I’m not taking any of your complaints when you regret this tomorrow.”

———

Kara wakes up with a decent hangover, which wouldn’t be so bad, if she didn’t also wake up to an empty bed and no Lena to snuggle.

With a pouty face and her eyes half closed, Kara glacially shuffles out towards the kitchen and freshly made coffee. Although, she quickly realizes her and Lena aren’t alone this morning when she hears a whispered conversation.

“Alex? What are doing here so early?” Kara inquires as she excitedly spots the donuts her sister must have brought over.

“Oh you know just catching up with my future sister-in-law about how your night was.” Alex says sharply.

Kara brushes past the sister-in-law comment and looks skeptically at Alex as she eats her second donut. “It was fine. Pretty low key.” Kara says with her mouth full.

Alex scoffs “LOWkey?! Mmm and how much of it do you remember there, Kar?”

Kara looks to Lena with questioning eyes but Lena won’t quite look at her as she chuckles behind her coffee cup. “Most of it...I mean I don’t really remember going to bed once we got home but -”

Lena bursts out laughing at Kara’s unassuming admission.

“This isn’t funny, Lena.” Alex chastises.

“I mean it kind of is, Alex. Come on, it wasn’t that bad in the end” Lena argues.

Kara cuts Alex off before she can argue back “What wasn’t that bad?”

“Oh why don’t we just show you superstar!” Alex quips.

Lena takes pity on Kara’s still confused face and pats the seat on the couch next to her “You’re gonna want to sit down for this one, honey.”

Kara takes the offered seat as Lena hands her phone over to Kara after opening the Tiktok app. Kara’s mouth immediately drops when she sees herself in her Supergirl suit on the screen.

“Oh no!” Kara gasps.

“Oh YES.” Alex digs. “Go on, press play.”

Kara presses play and immediately regrets it as she watches herself stare back with ‘sexy’ eyes and lick her lips before lip syncing:

“I wanna put you in 7 positions for 70 minutes. You get it babe. You got a lot on your mind and I want to ease it up and lick it and slip it in. You do a light scream on the ice cream when I scoop it and dip it in.”

“Oh. My. Rao.” Kara groans as she presses pause to stop the video. “Why am I seducing the camera in my Supergirl suit?”

“That’s a great question, isn’t it Kara?” Alex jabs sarcastically. “Lena?”

“You said it was trendy and that the TikTok gays would appreciate it.” Lena offers.

“Why didn’t you stop me??” Kara whines.

“I tried!” Lena defends. “You told me it was homophobic and a hate crime not to post it!”

“I am never drinking Vahorian Rum again.” Kara says as she sinks into the couch.

“You said that last time.” Alex mocks.

Kara glares at her sister before attempting her patented optimism. “Okay, so I made a TikTok as Supergirl last night. At least it’s just this one video with only - um” Kara checks the phone “3.6 million views...”

Kara sighs, “It could be worse.”

Alex and Lena exchange a knowing look and Kara’s eyes go wide.

“I made MORE than one video?!?” Kara postures.

“Try like six.” Alex huffs disapprovingly.

“Oh Rao!”

“Weeelllll, she only posted six...” Lena adds.

“OH RAO!” Kara groans. “Show them all to me now.”

The three of them proceed to watch all of Kara’s drunkenly produced TikToks from the night before.

“Ayyyoooooo bisexual check!”

Kara doesn’t even know how she manages to roll the sleeves and pants of her supersuit but she watches herself do it before putting a beanie and chucks on, grabbing her ukele, and topping it off by replacing her cape with a bisexual flag.

“I don’t even have a bisexual flag!” Kara blurts.

“You do now.” Alex points to it draped over the dining table.

Kara looks at Lena baffled.

“You said it was ‘essential’, yelled ‘brb’, and came back with the flag and some candy before I could open my mouth.” Lena explains.

Kara sighs and scrolls to the next video.

“Ayyyoooooo everyone thinks my cousin is hot check!”

This video turns out to be just Kara rolling her eyes and shaking her head with embarrassment in front of a bunch of pictures of Kal in his Superman suit. Most of the comments on the video are either ‘well they ain’t wrong doe’ or ‘not as hot as you Supergirl’ and Kara isn’t sure which she hates more.

The next one starts with Kara and Lena standing next to and looking at each other with background music and the caption ‘whenever Lex tries to take over the world’ and ends with them not missing a beat as they turn towards the camera and lip sync:

“What kind of fuckery is this?”

“Okay this one is kind of funny.” Kara cautiously proclaims.

“Yeah I liked that one too.” Lena admits with a smile.

“Should have said ‘whenever Lex does anything’.” Alex corrects. They all burst out laughing at that.

With the mood slightly lightened, Kara scrolls to the next video.

“Ayyyoooooo jawline check!”

Kara is already cringing again as she anticipates watching herself show off her jawline but is surprised when the camera flips to Lena rolling her eyes as Kara’s hand turns her head to its profile to hype up her girlfriend’s impeccable jawline.

“I’m so sorry” Kara says sheepishly.

“It’s okay, babe.” Lena reassures her as she presses a quick kiss to Kara’s lips.

“I mean...Lena’s jawline was made for this trend sooo...” Alex concedes.

Lena rolls her eyes again as Kara shrugs, “She’s not wrong, babe.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just watch the last one you posted because it’s Alex’s and mine’s favorite.” Lena says as she and Alex laugh in anticipation.

“Oh no.” Kara sighs before scrolling.

Music plays as she watches stock images of Superman, the Flash, and the Arrow pop up before Kara appears and lip syncs the last line with a cocky grin:

“These boys ain’t shit.”

“Oh my - Lena! How could you let me post theeeese?” Kara tries again.

“Listen,” Lena starts “you’re very stubborn when you’re drunk and it took everything I had to keep you from posting the other videos!”

“Do I even want to know?” Kara questions.

“I do!” Alex says taking a little too much enjoyment in Kara’s suffering.

Lena pulls out another phone.

“At least you guys were smart enough to use one of Supergirl’s burner phones and not your personal phones.” Alex says.

Lena tosses Alex a side eye. “Do I look stupid to you?” Lena asks rhetorically. “I also added extra layers of encryption to the app and the phone just in case.”

“Well I don’t know! You were stupid enough to fall in love with this idiot.” Alex mumbles as she points toward Kara.

“Normally I would be offended, but after last night, you might have a point.” Kara says.

Lena pulls up the the drafts she refused to let Kara post.

The first one is Kara floating with Lena in her arms in a bridal carry and the caption ‘when you save Lena Luthor from an attack’. Kara is looking at Lena before she turns to the camera and lip syncs:

“I think. You know. Where this about to go.”

Drunk Kara added some eyebrow raises and a wink before kissing Lena at the end.

“Okay it’s probably a really good thing you didn’t let me post this.” Kara admits.

“You think?!” Alex chastises.

Kara clicks on another video in the drafts to avoid Alex’s judgmental gaze.

This video is Kara and Lena standing in from of the camera facing each other as Kara lip syncs to her:

“You say we’re just friends....”

Kara smiles and pans to the camera. “But friends don’t know the way you taste.”

Kara smirks as Lena’s mouth drops and she goes to stop the recording immediately.

“OHkay I did not need to see that last one, Lena!” Alex complains.

“You asked for it.” Lena shrugs.

“She’s right. You did.” Kara backs up her girlfriend.

Alex glares at them both. “You two are lucky no one pieced together where you were or who you are!” Alex scolds as she points at Kara.

“I think it helped that Supergirl and I have a known working friendship.” Lena admits. “No one questioned why she was drunk and with me.”

“What has been the overall reaction to these?” Kara inquires.

“Honestly, it’s been mostly positive with most fans loving the content and an inside look at playful Supergirl.” Lena explains.

“Though there have been some critics questioning why a hero would get drunk at all with the responsibilities you have.” Alex levels. “And some negative responses from parents about the appropriateness of some of the content.”

Kara sighs resigned to the damage she has done.

“But. On the positive side, you were right!” Lena adds with encouragement.

Kara tilts her head quizzically.

“The gays LOVED it and they loved that they now definitively have a shot because you like girls!” Lena teases.

“Oh Rao! I can not believe Supergirl came out as bisexual on TikTok! Kate got an incredibly well written and thoughtful article on what it means to her and the world that Batwoman is gay and I got thirst traps! THIRST TRAPS!” Kara groans.

Alex shakes her head and Lena tries to hold back her laughter.

“I can’t believe you let me do this, Lena!”

“Hey, I told you it’s not my fault! You’re one stubborn alien when drunk.”

“But I’m your stubborn alien and you’re responsible for me.” Kara counters with a whine.

Lena sighs as she takes Kara into her arms. “You are my stubborn alien...with a drunken propensity for thirst traps.”

———

Kara embraces her drunken mistakes and utilizes her newly created TikTok fame to connect with the people and kids of National City on a more human level. She does PSAs and educational material in her videos as well as more lighthearted fun ones that people love.

She also managed to convince her superfriends to be in videos with her. The most liked videos on her page are the ‘flip the switch’ videos she’s done with the other heroes where the light goes off and they swap costumes. It started with Dreamer when Nia told her about it and convinced her to do it. Then Kara got Barry to do one (pretty easily) and then Sara, Killer Frost, J’onn, Mia, Constantine, and even Kate (after a lot of convincing). She also roped Kal into doing one with her old suit so he ended up in a skirt. That one is definitely her fav.

Generally, Supergirl’s official account has veered aware from making any more thirst traps, but that doesn’t seem stop other creators from making raunchy thirst traps about Supergirl.

Though, after some time and much convincing from Lena, Kara releases the last video in her drafts from that first drunken night.

“They say drunk words are sober thoughts” a sober Supergirl says as she shrugs and the video cuts to the clip of her drunk sprawled out upside down on the couch “Women are just like...sooooo HOT”

A lot of women liked that post.

[palmtreepalmtree]

Good afternoon, gentlepeople.  I’m back with another edition of 

The Worst Movie on Netflix Right Now™ Christmas Edition!

In case you missed it, a couple weeks ago we did Part 1 of a Country Christmas Round-up.  Now we’re back with Part 2 --- because nothing says Christmas like an acoustic guitar cover of “Silent Night.”

First up we’ve got Christmas in the Smokies...

Obviously by this point now you’ve encountered some tongue-in-cheek social media posts about Christmas romance holiday tropes.  A little bit of column A, column B, and column C and you’ve got yourself a holiday rom-com.  And you know what?  This one is no fucking different.  It’s like the writers just pulled the lever on the trope slot machine and wrote a movie for whatever got spit out.

Here’s the premise:  Shelby lives on her parents farm where they grow berries and make pies and jams.  But the bank is calling in their loan, due just after Christmas, while a developer salivates over the property.  Meanwhile, her country music star ex-boyfriend who ghosted her back when she was a teenager is back in town trying to rehabilitate his bad boy image.

And I think you know where it goes from there.  

This is one of the better quality Christmas rom-coms on Netflix right now.  Sarah Lancaster (you might recognize her from Chuck) can act just fine, and the supporting cast is equally serviceable. The production looks good --- as in they look like they’re in real homes in a real town in a real place --- which puts it well above the vast majority of these Netflix Christmas movies.  

But like, dude.  This movie is such a fucking bummer. Everything about it is sad. Shelby is sad and bitter.  She’s still SUPER PISSED OFF about having been stood up on Christmas by her ex-boyfriend when she was a teenager, even though it’s definitely at least a decade later.  I mean, I get it.  He is the reason she has abandonment issues and never left home.  It was traumatic!  But like... GET THE FUCK OVER IT.  Go on with your life!  You’re a beautiful woman!  Have you seriously dated no one since you were sixteen?

And when you combine that with the constant impending doom of them losing their family farm...?  Like mannnn.  The Smokies are rough.

Girl, same.

As far as country Christmas movies go, this one is decent.  Shelby says things like, “You always were all hat and no cattle” which is as home-spun as any of these movies get.  It doesn’t get the real snow bonus, but there are horses and places that look like actual farms, so it’s got that going for it.  Heads-up guys, this one scores two out of three wise men on the putting-the-Christ-in-Christmas scale.  Amen.

The last movie in our Country Christmas Round-up is Christmas in the Heartland...

So, full disclosure.  I was about 15 minutes into this movie before I realized it was not a Christmas rom-com.  Instead, it’s a teen flick.  But you know what’s weird?  I liked this movie better than pretty much anything else I’ve watched so far this year.  Cause this movie is fucking INSANE.  Here’s the premise:

Two teenage girls have a chance encounter on a flight heading to Oklahoma where they’re both going to spend Christmas with previously estranged or unknown family members.  Kara is a rich girl who is going to meet her wealthy estranged grandparents for the first time.  Jessie is a poor girl who is going to meet her trailer-park grandmother who only recently learned that her son had a daughter.  These two girls hatch a plan to swap lives.  Instead of going to their own family members, they’ll go see how the other half lives.  They swap clothes and identities, and then get off the plane to their new lives.

Like, to begin with, it’s BANANAS that they thought that this would work at all.  But of course things immediately get complicated.  Kara -- posing as Jessie -- is about to meet Jessie’s dad for the first time, whom Jessie has never met!  Jessie -- posing as Kara -- is being pressured to act like a debutante and date the right boy and enter pageants and... well it’s a mess y’all.  

The thing about this movie is that everything works for it in the way that a made-for-TV teen Christmas movie should work.  Shelley Long is great as an Oklahoman trailer grandmother and Bo Derek is great as the Oklahoman rich snob.  As the two families start to come to life on screen, you kinda believe it?  Like these people feel real and sweet and lovely and maybe, just maybe, I kinda would want to spend Christmas with them? 

The writing is also kinda lovely when it needs to be --- not particularly good, but definitely not bad either.  It just does what it’s supposed to do.  It gives the cast room to play without getting in their way.  And even as the plot starts to spiral, you really kind of go with it.  

And boy does the plot spiral.

Just when you think this movie could not get more crazy, it absolutely does.  Like I didn’t even see the direction this fucking movie was going.  It’s so insane, I don’t even want to spoil it for you cause you should absolutely watch this batshit movie.   

Overall, the reason that Christmas in the Heartland wins this weird-o Country Christmas Round-Up is because everyone involved in it looks like they’re having a fun time.  They know this is fucking insane.  The movie is earnest when you want it to be and silly when you don’t.  It’s kinda just a good old wacky time.  And I don’t know what else you can want out of a made-for-TV Christmas movie.

[keepapplesaday]

“The kids, they ambushed me.” for the supercorp holiday fics.

Thank you for sending this in! Here you go!

Established supercorp a few years into the future~

Send me a prompt! 

-------

Lena was about 6 seconds away from murdering Santa.

Well, not actually Santa Claus. Just some guy named Ernst Archer who was supposed to be playing Santa for the L-Corp’s Annual Toy Drive for the kids later that day, but decided that getting drunk the night before and starting a bar fight only to end up arrested would be a good use of his time.

“And there’s no one else?” Lena asked, pinching the bridge of her nose in a very vain attempt at curbing the oncoming migraine.

Jess looked apologetic as she shook her head. “Not really. Everyone’s already booked solid at the Santa agency, and since it’s for today-”

“Right. Oh, the press will have a field day with this,” Lena murmured with a groan. “I can see the headlines now: Luthor scams needy children out of a visit from Santa Claus. World Domination next?”

“I’m sure we’ll be able to come up with something.” Jess tried to sound reassuring, but with a simple glance from Lena told her that it wouldn’t be that easy.

Just then, the phone rang - some investors from France - and Jess left Lena to her call, while she brainstormed. Who could possibly fit the role of Santa on such short notice?

By the time that Lena had hung up, Jess was practically brimming with excitement (which was a first for her generally composed secretary). “I have got the perfect idea.”

Lena raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Kara.”

“Kara?”

“Yep.”

“Kara Danvers?”

“The very one.”

Lena was sure she was missing something. “You want my girlfriend to dress up as Santa Claus? I don’t think she’d fit the bill, even if we did stick a cotton beard on her and stuffed a pillow into the suit.”

Jess shook her head with a small laugh at the mental image. “Not as Santa. Have her go as Supergirl! Think about it. What kid wouldn’t love to get presents from Supergirl? It’s like the next best thing, except she’s actually real and can fly, so really, it’s probably an even better idea than a Santa impersonator.”

“That actually might work,” Lena said as she pondered the idea. If there was one thing that made Jess such a wonder, was her out-of-the-box thinking. “I’ll have to see if she’s available.”

“I’ll leave you to it,” Jess said, heading back out of the office. And then she paused to poke her head back in. “But please tell me what she says, in case I need to figure out something else. The event starts in 3 hours.”

“You got it.” Lena smiled and nodded. She took out her phone and sent Kara a quick message asking if she was available for a ‘Super Assignment’.

Rather than answer her with a text, Kara decided to actually show up, standing by her balcony door suited up and everything.

“You know, if superhero-ing doesn’t work out for you, you have a great future as a delivery person,” Lena said with a grin as she stood up and walked over to the other woman. “And you know you could have just texted back.”

“And miss the opportunity to see you?” Kara said, beaming. She wrapped her arms Lena’s waist and pulled her girlfriend close to give her a swift kiss.

But Lena wasn’t going to let her go so easily, instead placing her hands on either side of Kara’s face and pulling her into a deeper kiss.

They probably would have kept going if it wasn’t for Jess and her meticulous planning, popping her head into the office, hand over her eyes, having already learnt her lesson from past unplanned entrances while Kara was around. She cleared her throat and started, “I really don’t mean to be that person but-”

Kara and Lena sprung apart, blushing a deep shade of red. “It’s okay Jess, we’re decent.”

“Oh thank goodness,” Jess said with a sigh of relief in her voice as she removed her hand from in front of her eyes and fully stepped in, tablet ready. “Now, Kara: yes or no?”

“To...what?” Kara asked, looking between the two women with confusion.

“Right, I hadn’t actually gotten a chance to explain,” Lena murmured, starting to explain what the situation was before Jess managed to get a jab in about Lena thinking with other parts of her body rather than her head when it came to Kara.

“So you guys need me to do a toy drive?” Kara asked, making sure she understood.

Jess nodded. “That’s the gist. Are you in?”

“Of course!” Kara said. “Oh and I have the perfect outfit!”

“Outfit?” Lena asked, brows furrowing.

Before she could ask for clarification, Kara had flown off, leaving the other two women perplexed.

-------

Turns out that Kara had gotten another suit made a few years ago. A specifically holiday themed one.

It was simply the most garish holiday themed anything Lena had ever seen.

“How many candy canes did you have to murder for this?” Lena asked, unsure if she actually wanted to know.

Kara just laughed. “You love it.”

“I do not,” Lena clarified, looking as if the bright red suit that Kara was sporting, with a pair of white boots and a matching white cape, were personally affronting her. “I most certainly don’t.”

She was at least thankful that whoever had come up with the idea hadn’t decided to also add a fluffy edge to the cape.

“Want to get going?” Kara asked, tilting her head towards the city.

“Flying?” Lena asked; as much as she loved flying with Kara, she was not going to do so while Kara wore that eyesore.

“Yep, probably before Jess comes back in to say we’re going to be late.”

“Well, I’ll just-” she was cut off by her own yelp as Kara picked her up and flew them towards the event in a blur of red, white, and gold.

So maybe she should amend: she might kill Santa after all for having chosen such a loud colour scheme.

Lena stood by the sidelines with the event coordinator as Kara entertained the kids by making them fly with her, and some hung on her cape as she jumped up a few feet. They had been there for a few hours now, and the children were beyond ecstatic.

“Thank you so much for this,” the coordinator was saying. “I don’t know how you managed to get Supergirl, but this is much better than any Santa they’ve ever had.”

“I have my connections,” Lena responded with a smile.

Suddenly, a platoon of children with shiny new Nerf guns aimed their weapons at her. “Fire!”

Kara was pelted with about a dozen darts, and she made the dramatic show of seemingly succumbing to her injuries - with some added dramatic flair - and Lena smiled softly. Her girlfriend was the biggest goofball.

The kids began piling on her and declared victory, puffing their chests out. With a gasp, the coordinator and some of the other staff scurried off to check on the children before they got too rowdy. “Alright children, let’s wrap this up, it’s getting late!”

Once Kara began to sit up, Lena called out, “So Supergirl was finally bested huh?”

“The kids ambushed me!” Kara laughed, floating up and away from the pile of children, to make her way to her girlfriend. “But I know what will heal me right away.”

“Oh, what’s that?” Lena asked, feigning ignorance.

Kara snaked her arm to wrap behind Lena’s waist as they stood side by side watching the children get their stuff and head out in a single line until they were alone in the event hall.

“We could start off with a kiss,” Kara began.

“Ah,” Lena hummed. “I’m sorry to say, Supergirl, I am in a relationship with someone. Though I will accept a ride back home since you brought me here. I’m sure my girlfriend won’t mind that.”

“Oh really? The great Lena Luthor is dating?” Kara continued the charade, though she couldn’t stop her grin from spreading. She always got giddy when they spoke of their relationship and Lena called Kara her girlfriend. She picked Lena up with practised ease and headed outside before pushing off towards the sky.

“Indeed, and even if I wasn’t,” Lena started, voicing raising a bit to be heard over the wind, “The outfit you’re wearing is a mood-killer.”

Kara huffed good humoredly. “It’ll grow on you.”

“I know it won’t, darling,” Lena confirmed. “The minute we get home, you are divesting yourself from that affront to supersuits everywhere.”

With a laugh, Kara said, “So what I’m getting from this is that you want me naked the second we touch down?”

That got Lena to snap her mouth shut.

To which Kara added, “Now what would your girlfriend say to that, Ms. Luthor? Or worse, what would my girlfriend say to that?”

They landed in their apartment balcony before Lena said, “I know your girlfriend would say, ‘shut up and kiss me.’”

And Kara did just that.

[apptg554]

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[of-suns-and-guns]

7, 27, 37, 42

– – –

true love’s kiss & silver linings

– – –

Alex waits until they’re back in the car and already heading out of the mall parking lot before she finally speaks up.

“Have you kissed a girl?” Alex asks with as much nonchalance as she can muster, given the mayhem currently ravaging her mind.

Kara’s head whips up from her phone and Alex can only imagine what kind of expression Kara’s drilling into the side of her head, but her eyes stay resolutely on the road ahead.

“Random. Why?” Kara draws out, both suspicious and wary in that one tone.

Alex gnaws on her lip and checks her mirrors as she shifts lanes, stalling while she tries to figure out what her position should be in this conversation.

“Just…curious, I guess. I mean, you never mentioned anything, so I assumed, b-but you and your friends could've…” Alex shakes her head. Getting off topic, Alexandra. “Jen hinted that she’s gonna try to get a game of spin-the-bottle going at the next post-game party.” Alex shrugs like it’s no big deal. “I was just wondering if it was a subject you knew anything about.”

“You were…wondering if I knew anything about kissing girls?” Kara clarifies.

“Yup,” Alex says with too much pop and grimaces to herself as she navigates the car toward the turnpike.

“Isn’t…I thought Jen was bi. Why don’t you ask her?”

There’s a text message in Alex’s phone at that very moment that comprises the entire reason she can’t ask Jen.

Hope to see u there, Danvers ;)

“It-it doesn’t matter.” Alex forces a smile, swallowing back the nerves that flutter up her throat. “So how are things with Will going?”

“Alex,” Kara starts in that understanding, supportive-sister tone. “If you’re not comfortable playing a game like that, I doubt Jen, or anyone else on your team, would judge you for backing out. You’re not obligated to play it, if you don’t want to.”

Her shoulders slump with a sigh, her head tipping back against the headrest as they coast down the highway. “No, it’s not…it’s not that. That's—” the opposite of what I want, “—not my issue with it.”

“Then…what is the issue?”

Her fingers tighten around the steering wheel, fairly certain there’s no way to actually say this without coming off as some insecure weirdo.

“I don't—” She cuts herself off with a hard, frustrated breath. “It’s just, girls are supposed to be better kissers, right?”

She catches Kara’s shrug out of the corner of her eye.

“Well, that’s what everyone thinks, so it’s what everyone expects,” Alex tells her, glancing briefly at Kara’s furrowed brow. “So I’m just. I dunno, what if I’m…not. Better. Or good, or whatever. I dunno, what if I’m only a good kisser by guys’ standards, but I don’t, like, live up to a girl’s standard, y'know?”

“Wait.” Kara holds up her hand and shakes her head. “You’re worried you’re not a good enough kisser?”

She says it like that’s ridiculous. Like she doesn’t actually understand what Alex is saying. Like there’s no way Alex can be anything other than entirely self-assured about her sexual prowess, despite the fact that Alex has never been particularly open about those things, especially with Kara, so really, where does Kara come off being all incredulous, like she knows.

“Yeah, well, it’s not like I’ve got a lot of empirical data to go on here,” Alex throws back hotly, teeth clenched as she jerks the car toward the off-ramp just a little rougher than necessary. “For all I know, I could be an irreparably terrible kisser, and all the guys I’ve been with have just been too clueless to key me in—”

“Alex, that’s not—”

“But then come Friday, I’ll finally get the chance to kiss her, and she’ll wonder what the hell she was thinking, ‘cause, turns out, I’m just so god-awful at it, and then every freaking girl in school will know—”

“Al—”

“Guys are just so much fuckin’ easier, you know? They really don’t give a fuck what I’m doing with my mouth as long as they’re reasonably sure it’s headed down to—”

“Alex!”

Kara’s sharp cry cuts through the heavy, rambling fog, and Alex chances a glance over, just in time to see her face twisted in disgust as she visually struggles to push away the open-ended mental image Alex had clearly put in her head.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, anger dulling as swiftly as it had come.

Kara nods and winds her fingers together in her lap. “Me too. That didn’t…I wasn’t thinking about how that sounded before I said it.” She breathes in to the count of three, then out to the count of five, sending Alex a soft, forgiving smile as she relaxes. “So. Okay. From the top. You’re worried girls will expect you to be a more dexterous kisser than you can confidently claim you are. Correct?”

Alex snorts, ease settling into her shoulders for the first time since Jen’s message had come through and she’s suddenly reminded of exactly why she prefers her sister’s company over just about everyone else on the planet.

“That is correct, High Judicator Zor-El,” Alex teases, shooting Kara a playful side-glance and earning herself a solid whack to the chest. “Abuse! I call abuse! I’m telling mom!”

“You’ll tell her what? That sweet, innocent Kara Danvers actually struck you?” Kara scoffs playfully. “Your case is entirely circumstantial. Won’t even see a day in court.” Kara’s eyes twinkle when she catches Alex’s at the next red light, drawing Alex in like a soft, safe glow. “Also, no changing the subject. We’re talking about you and kissing. Okay, so, three things—”

The car behind them lays on their horn when Alex fails to notice the light turn.

Alex grumbles something profane under her breath as she eases them down Main toward home.

“Right, so kissing girls,” Kara starts again. “One, you’re good at literally everything. I doubt kissing is a shortcoming of yours.”

“Playing soccer and understanding quantum theory are very different than whatever it takes to be a decent kisser.”

Kara shoots her a look that tells her, in no uncertain terms, to hush.

“Two, if Jen does have any complaints, then you can always blame it on inebriation.” And then Kara continues under her breath like Alex can’t hear, “Or her.”

Alex narrows her eyes at the odd bitterness that seems to have suddenly edged into Kara’s tone, where Jen is concerned, but swallows back the question as she pulls up their long driveway toward the carpark outside the garage, coming to a stop beside her mother’s blue Camry.

“And three?” Alex prompts, throwing the car in park and turning to Kara, eyebrows raised expectantly.

There’s a quarter-beat, just long enough for Kara wet her lips, before she’s swiftly closed the distance between them, her hand behind Alex’s neck dragging Alex’s mouth down to hers, Alex’s startled cry getting lost in Kara’s lips, and then Alex’s mind sparks to blinding white.

Soft. Her lips are soft. Silky smooth, and undemanding, moving gently into and against Alex’s, like she’s only interested in teasing Alex into action.

Some part of her consciousness kicks into gear then, just enough to shakily return the kiss Kara’s asking from her, and Kara hums against her lips in response, her thumb stroking Alex’s cheek.

The kiss draws out. Slow, unhurried, and Alex finds herself melting into it with every soft, reverent movement, until she’s the one parting her lips, deepening the kiss further, thrilling at the throaty little sound it pulls from her sister’s chest.

Kara’s fingers slip into her hair, and Alex ignores the pain in her ribs as she presses herself harder against the console in an attempt to get closer, her mouth moving against Kara’s in earnest, every inch of skin beginning to flush deliciously warm with something like unfulfilled addiction.

There’s an excitement blooming in her chest that she hasn’t felt since probably her first kiss with her first boyfriend when she was fifteen, but even that felt somehow blunted compared to this. This warm, sweet, heady mix of satin lips and a taste so obviously Kara, Alex is half-convinced this can’t be the first time she’s tasted her, already so familiar with her.

She doesn’t want it to end. Her body just wants to keep the contact forever. It feels too good to just stop.

But it does slow, easing to an end as Kara slips away from her.

They’re practically panting when it’s over, foreheads nearly touching, Kara’s fingers still stroking at the back of Alex’s neck, Alex’s hand softly cupping Kara’s forearm, and there’s a suspended moment of lassitude in the aftermath. Just a gentle glow that protects them inside their own little atmosphere for just a little while longer.

“Nine out of ten,” Kara murmurs into the air between their lips.

Alex hums, then her brain clicks onto the words. “Wait, nine out of ten?”

Kara gives a sheepish smile, her thumb brushing against the edge of Alex’s jaw in a wholly distracting way. “I didn’t think you’d believe me if I told you it was a full ten out of ten.”

Alex is still taking a long moment to process the meaning, still lagging somewhere in the kiss she’d very much like to recapture right about now.

But then it hits her like a bucket of frigid water; Jen, the party, one, two, three—

Oh. That was three. The kiss was three. The rating was three. Kara kissed her to give her an assessment of her kissing technique.

Ten out of ten.

Kara slips back into her seat, clearing her throat. “So, yeah, you have nothing to worry about, if you do end up deciding to kiss a girl at the party.”

Kara smiles, and Alex thinks maybe it looks a little strained, but she’d rather not consider why that might be.

Alex nods a bit too brusquely. “Yeah, thanks. That…does help,” she manages to force out.

Kara smiles again and squeezes her arm, before finally getting out of the still-running car, leaving Alex suspended in the aftermath, struggling to sort through everything that’s just happened.

Alex’s forehead hit the steering wheel with a satisfying thump. Then again, and again, and again, half-hoping it’ll erase the taste of Kara’s lips from her mouth.

At least now she knows she won’t disappoint Jen. That counts for something, right?

Even if Alex is reasonably certain Jen’s not going to live up to expectation after that.

She thinks she might be fucked.

– – –

fin

– – –

The prompt was: immortality, epiphany, true love’s kiss, and silver linings.

Technically, epiphany is also included in this, in a way, but I liked the title better as two words. And I really couldn’t figure out a good way to fit immortality into the others. It’s just such a big concept that it sometimes overtakes the others.

Anyway, sorry it’s taking me so long to get through these. I get stuck a lot.

Thanks for the prompt! Hope you like it!

[tinylilemrys]

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: MY DEAL WITH THE DEVIL

Read it on AO3

Summary:

Folk-musician, Merlin Emrys, feels like he’s slowly but surely getting his foot in the door in the music industry. He has a decent following on social media, a gig almost every other night and people have (mostly) stopped pouring beer into his guitar case as a tip. But when an old friend of Gwen’s offers him a slot as the warm-up act for one of his favourite musicians on a live music show watched worldwide, Merlin finds his career fast-tracked.

Now, navigating fake relationships, tabloid gossip, the paparazzi, corporate scandals and a rather unfortunate crush on Arthur Pendragon, the handsome owner of Excalibur Records, Merlin is learning that big dreams come at a huge price.

It was extremely difficult for Merlin to decide what he was meant to be feeling in that moment.

He supposed that part of him had always suspected that something was off with Mordred, but it had been pleasantly suppressed by mild hero-worship and even stronger attraction. Now every uneasy laugh, perplexing remark and sideways glance was thrown into sharp relief. Kara and Mordred. Kara and Mordred Jones. God, they had the same surname – how could it be possible that no one had drawn the connection before?

He disentangled himself from Mordred and took a step back.

“How is that even possible?”

“We were childhood sweethearts,” Mordred replied, raking an unsteady hand through his unwashed curls. “Please, Merlin, I’ll explain everything to you as soon as we get out of here.”

“Not a fuck, Mordred.” He let out a huff of humourless laughter. “I have the utmost sympathy for you. Believe me, I do. But you’ll have to forgive me if I’m not thrilled at the idea of going off somewhere with someone who has just admitted to living a lie for the past however many years.”

“Merlin…” Mordred frustratedly pleaded. When Merlin refused to budge, Mordred sighed. “Fine, come here.”

He grabbed Merlin’s elbow and directed him around the corner, where there were fewer people.

“Okay, if telling you the whole sordid story means that you’ll actually agree to come with me, here it goes. Kara and I got married in our last year of secondary. She’d found out that she was pregnant and her parents, who are the worst kind of religious nutters, insisted we get married to preserve her virtue or whatever. We were young. Really young. Too young. God, sixteen isn’t the age to be making any lasting life decisions, but we were in love and excited and stupid. It all felt like some brilliant adventure at the time. Then Kara lost the baby and her parents wanted us to get a divorce even though we’d never needed each other more. So we ran away to London, changed our surname from Owen to Jones and started a new life.”

Merlin’s heart constricted painfully. As the words kept tumbling out of Mordred’s mouth, Merlin wondered when he had last had someone to talk to about this.

“Kara had wanted to be a journalist for as long as I’d known her, so we both worked our arses off to put her through college, while at the same time trying to save enough so that she could go to uni. Kara always insisted that I use my free nights to find places to play my music and that’s how Agravaine found me. I was playing at this seedy little pub one night and he came up to me afterwards and asked me how much I was being paid for the gig. It wasn’t much. I mean, I was completely unknown at the time and – you’ll know – anything you get paid for your music when you’re first starting out seems too good to be true. Anyway, I told Agravaine and he immediately went to the pub owner and demanded he pay me more. The bloke was reluctant at first but Agravaine was relentless and I eventually got paid triple what we’d first agreed on. It was the most money I had seen in a long time and I was convinced then that Agravaine was some kind of godsend, so when he left his card and asked me to call him when I was ready to make a real career out of music, I immediately went home to discuss it with Kara.”

“And then you signed up with Agravaine?” asked Merlin with a grimace. Everything was beginning to make a twisted amount of sense.

“Not initially,” Mordred replied. “Kara and I had a meeting with him and told him that we couldn’t afford to risk everything when we were so close to finally having enough for Kara to study. Agravaine, slimy git that he is, told us not worry about all that and immediately began making arrangements. It was barely ten minutes later when he announced that Kara had a place at a really good school for the next academic year, all paid for, provided that we both sign contracts with him.

“And we signed them. Of course we signed them. We had spent our late teens as poor as church mice, trying to scrape together enough for some kind of future. This seemed like chance of a lifetime. We didn’t realise at the time that we’d effectively sold our souls. It didn’t matter as much then that part of my contract was that I couldn’t be seen in a relationship so that I was more marketable, because I was so thrilled to be making a real living from my music. And the knowledge that part of Kara’s contract was that Agravaine would have a say in whatever she published seemed completely harmless while she was studying and there were no major stakes. As long as we were discrete and careful about what we did, we had a new peace freedom that felt exciting and foreign. It was like suddenly remembering that we weren’t old. We still had so much life left.

“It was only when all the shit with Arthur happened that I realised something was off.”

Merlin didn’t respond to this. He waited with bated breath to hear Mordred’s side of the story that swam to the surface of his mind in moments of insecurity.

“We don’t have to talk about the Arthur stuff if you’d rather not,” said Mordred glancing over at Merlin. “I know things are probably still really raw for you.”

“Like they aren’t for you?” said Merlin. “Honestly, just tell me what happened, Mordred.”

“Well, there’s not actually that much to it, other than the fact that I think Agravaine was hoping to use me to publicly out him. I had stupidly mentioned at some point that I was bi and Agravaine latched on to the idea with a scary amount of enthusiasm. He initially encouraged and later demanded that I get close to Arthur – that I flirt with Arthur. I refused at first because the idea of cheating on Kara made me sick to my stomach, but he quickly threatened to tank her career just as it was finally starting to take off. So I did it. I flirted my arse off and Arthur was so desperately lonely and repressed that it didn’t take long for it to look like Agravaine was going to get what he wanted. We kissed a few times and went on one or two dates that might as well have been two blokes just hanging out for how careful Arthur was about them. I felt cheaper at that time than I ever had when Kara and I were earning barely enough to scrape by.

“It was just as I was working out that it was starting to become more than just messing around for Arthur – that he was starting to develop real feelings for me – that Agravaine pulled me from Excalibur and forced me to sign with Mercia. I realised then that I was just a puppet to be used for whatever shitty thing he needed me to do. From that point on, if he needed dirt on an artist or celebrity, he’d send me in and… well let’s just say Kara and I had an arrangement when it came to Agravaine ‘jobs’. They didn’t count, but they still hurt. In our sickening new routine, I’d flirt, kiss and sleep with whoever Agravaine’s victim was and pass Kara the information to publish in whatever celebrity rag offered the most for it.”

“Like with the car park incident with Valiant and Cenred? Was that Agravaine using you?”

“No,” said Mordred, scrubbing a hand down his pale and exhausted face. “Val and Ced work for Agravaine too, so I wasn’t needed there. But, for instance, with you…”

“Ah,” said Merlin, another few puzzle pieces slotting into place. “I was an Agravaine assignment.”

“Yeah,” said Mordred, his hand balling into a white-knuckled fist at his side. “When you and Arthur were still… well, Agravaine suspected that the relationship was bullshit so he initially wanted me to get you to ditch Arthur for me to confirm his suspicions. Once Arthur told him everything, it wasn’t necessary anymore. But then you guys had the breakup and Agravaine wanted to discredit your relationship with Arthur without outright saying that it was fake, so he got me a last minute ticket to the Mortal Labyrinth premiere with the mission to make sure we connected.”

“It worked,” said Merlin, resolving never to doubt Gwen ever again. That girl knew what was up.

“It did,” said Mordred, “And fuck, Merlin, I’m so sorry. I don’t know how involved you got with feelings but I promise you that I really didn’t want to hurt you. It’s what happens when you give any part of your life to Agravaine – he uses it to mercilessly control you. It was only after Ellie said that thing about risk being worth it if you love someone that I actually summoned the courage to find a plan for Kara and I to escape Agravaine. But Agravaine… he’s even more ruthless and powerful than we thought and now Kara…”

Mordred closed his eyes as if just the thought was causing him physical pain. He breathed deeply for a moment or two before opening his eyes to look at Merlin again. At any other time Merlin would have felt uncomfortable at this much eye-contact with another person, but Mordred’s eyes were hollow and hungry, as if desperately trying to grasp at whatever warmth and hope they could get and Merlin found that he couldn’t look away.

Eventually though, Mordred glanced down at his pocket to pull out his mobile.

“She tried to warn me,” he said, tapping open his photo album. His brow was deeply furrowed as he swiped to find the image he was looking for. Once it appeared that he had found it, he thrust the phone into Merlin’s hand. “That was her suicide note. I took a photo because they wouldn’t let me keep it. She left me a message, Merlin. She had a gun or god knows what pointed at her and she somehow still had the presence of mind to send me a message.”

Though slightly perturbed at the idea of being let in on the personal last words of a woman he had actively disliked (as much as he tried to reason that this was actually Agravaine’s fault), Merlin read the note.

my songbird

i hate to do this but it can’t go on anymore. there’s so much to say, but not enough time to say it. i’m so Very sorry for putting you through All of this. i only wish that i had more time now to assure you of how much i Love you And the immeasurable worth of what you have been for me through the cruelly Numbered years. oh how i wish i could steal a few more days, hours, moments to repay you, but something Dark and evil is pushing me towards the edge And i’ve run out of time to give.

always know, love, that i never wanted to leave you. i tried to stay as long as i could, but i have to Go. there’s no other way out.

also know, love, that i never Regretted Any of the Very short days i spent with you. even in the hard times when it All seemed impossible, you were what I woke up for each morning – all i ever Needed. my Everything.

oh my love, i need you To promise now to hold Onto the sweet, Kind, gentle heart of the man I fell in Love with. don’t Let this make you bitter and cold and don’t ever think that this is because you didn’t love me enough.

YOU were perfect, this world was not.

all my love until i see you again

kara

p.s. we’ll always have paris - x –

Merlin’s initial thought upon seeing the unusual punctuation was that the stress of her situation had screwed up her command of the English language, until he noticed that underneath the photocopy of her note, scrawled in hasty blue pen, was another note.

VAL AND AGRAVAINE TO KILL YOU

Merlin scanned through Kara’s words again, his eyes darting to each strangely capitalised word, and he was blown away at what she had somehow managed to do despite being faced with the imminent end of her life.

“She was a genius,” said Mordred softly, probably noticing the mixture of surprise and horror Merlin felt as it crept across his face. “A stupid, selfless genius who used her last moments to warn me instead of naming her killer.”

“Holy shit, Mordred,” said Merlin. “What now?”

“I’ve been working with Chief Inspector Katherine Annis. She’s on my side a hundred percent, but says she has to leave the case alone for now because she’s using it to sniff out officers who she believes are being paid to deliberately change the outcome of cases like this. That’s where I was hoping to take you now. She thinks that Aridean is going to try to pin Kara and Arthur on us, painting it like we worked together to… she just wants to make sure that you know what might happen.”

“When is she expecting us?”

“In the next fifteen minutes or so. If we leave now, we should make it on time.”

“Okay, I’m going to go with you,” said Merlin, “but first let me run in to let Arthur know. With all the shit going on, I don’t want to disappear and have him worry about me.” Mordred nodded and Merlin immediately began sprinting back towards the entrance of the hospital.

He almost tripped over his feet when, to his surprise, he saw Arthur striding gingerly towards him. His face was deeply etched with concern that eased slightly when he noticed Merlin. In his attempts to reach him, Arthur stumbled clumsily and almost fell over. Merlin immediately rushed to him and reached out a hand to help stabilise him. It wasn’t a moment later that he heard the first siren and somehow instinctively knew that it was for him.

“My love, they’re about to take me away,” said Merlin, taking a step closer to Arthur. “I know you’re not altogether here right now, but please try to understand and remember as much of this as possible. They’re going to say some things about me that aren’t true. They’re going to say that I killed Kara Jones and that I tried to kill you too. That I did it because I love Mordred. Don’t listen to a word of it, alright? I love you more than anything and I would never ever do anything to intentionally hurt you, you hear me?”

The sirens were so loud they were almost deafening. Merlin, unsure of what was about to happen to him, pulled Arthur into one last hug.

“I love you,” he repeated.

“What’s going on, Merlin?” his eyes were wide with concern and in that moment, it was hard to believe that Merlin was seven years younger than him. He looked so impossibly small and defeated.

“I love you, Arthur,” Merlin said again, as police officers began surrounding him.

“Merlin Emrys,” smirked DI Aredian, his voice a perfect mirror of the cold, steely cuffs now being snapped around his wrists, “you are under arrest for the murder of Kara Jones and the attempted murder of Arthur Pendragon. You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defence if you do not mention, when questioned, something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence.”

A few feet away from him, Mordred was also being served his police caution.

Merlin tried to keep his eyes fixed on his angry and confused Arthur, who at first tried to fight his way through the line of police officers in front of him to get to Merlin, but was now just watching on as Merlin was manhandled into the back of the nearest police car. As they drove off, a nurse was clutching Arthur’s arm, trying to tug him inside and away from the cameras, but he wouldn’t budge.

The last thing Merlin saw as they rounded the corner was Arthur, resolutely still and seemingly impervious to the chaos around him. He had no way of knowing, but every wish he had left went into hoping that Arthur wouldn’t lose faith in him. The small hope that Arthur would still love and trust him after all of this had been cleared up was the only thing that was going to get him through this.

That, and the certain knowledge that Agravaine was behind this and that someday soon he would be rotting in a prison cell, far out of the reach of anyone Merlin loved and cared about.

***

Merlin, like most musicians who had dreamed of making it big someday, imagined his life post-breakout in detail. He had imagined signing the record contract, hearing his first single on the radio, playing his first stadium gig to a sold-out audience.

Never in a million years did he imagine that his music career would lead to the cold Scotland Yard holding cell in which he now found himself.

As he lay on the bed, staring up at the bleak grey of the ceiling above him, he wondered how much of what was happening to him could have been avoided by just becoming the marketer he had studied to become. He wouldn’t be in this cell, for one. He would have never had to stare into the cold eyes of Kara Jones. He would never have been betrayed by Mordred. He would never have had to deal with Agravaine.

You also would have never met Arthur, said a familiar unhelpful voice in his head. And doesn’t he make all of this worth it?

Merlin was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of approaching footsteps and the sound of his bars being unlocked.

“Hands behind your back, please, Mr Emrys. You’re being taken to the interrogation room,” explained the kinder-looking of the two officers now entering his cell. The other began slipping another set of heavy cuffs around his wrists. Merlin briefly considered making a comment about how they should buy him a drink first, but thought better of it. If Agravaine had people on the inside, the last thing he wanted was to make things worse for himself.

The officers and Merlin made their way down one or two of the frigid passages, finally entering through an unassuming door halfway down one of them. After removing his cuffs, they sat Merlin in a chair on one side of the wooden table so that he was faced with his reflection in the two-way mirror on the opposite wall. The two days he had been locked up had not been kind to him. A five-o’-clock shadow dusted his face and his black eye was enhanced by the dark rings under his eyes from the stress of the last few days. Merlin felt anger bubble beneath the surface of his skin. This was unfair and sick. His boyfriend had been poisoned two days ago and had barely begun his recovery when Merlin had last seen him. No one had told him anything since he had arrived here, even though Katherine Annis supposedly knew that he was innocent, if Mordred was to be believed. What if Agravaine had got to Arthur? What if he was in danger right now? Merlin was completely powerless to protect him and the knowledge of it made every minute in these icy walls pure agony.

Merlin’s inner tirade was interrupted by another tirade right outside the door.

“… and as such it is my job to interrogate any and all suspects. I will not let you interfere and tamper with my case.”

The second voice was much calmer and more measured – dangerous even.

“You’re forgetting your place, Aredian. If you continue being insubordinate I will take you off this case faster than you can say ‘incompetence’. Now as your murder and attempted murder case has also turned into a likely kidnapping at the hand of one of your officers, I suggest you get to the important task of finding the victim. I will interrogate the suspects.”

There was the sound of furious strides down the hallway and then the door of the room was creaking open again.

He recognised her as soon as he saw her. Her red hair was pulled back into a severe bun that mirrored the rigid and restrained nature of her expression. Though Merlin noted that she was shorter than he had thought she was when watching her on the news, she was still clearly not someone to be trifled with. Despite this, her face softened as she settled on the chair on the other side of the table and her expression softened into the warmest look he had received since his arrest.

“Merlin Emrys, I’m DCI Katherine Annis,” she said, extending a hand for Merlin to shake which Merlin did. “Firstly, that red light on the wall means that this conversation is being listened to but not by any of Aredian’s people, so you don’t have to be afraid of what you say. Secondly, on behalf of the Met, I would like to apologise for what we’ve put you through these past few days.”

The horrible reality of her words to Aredian suddenly struck Merlin and he looked at her in terror.

“God, did you say that there’s been a kidnapping? Who? Not Arthur?”

Annis’ expression softened further into what looked like pity and Merlin’s worst fears were confirmed.

“He disappeared from the hospital yesterday,” she explained. “Security footage shows what appears to be one of our officers leading Arthur from his room in the early hours of the morning. Neither of them has been spotted since.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” yelled Merlin, feeling all the simmering anger of the past few days rise to the surface. “Aren’t you people supposed to be watching people who have recently almost been murdered? Or is that just the old-fashioned way the police operate?”

“Merlin, I understand that you’re upset, but I can –“

“UPSET? I’m fucking livid!” Merlin was standing now, kicking back his chair in anger. The officer standing against the wall took a step closer, but Annis raised a hand to stop him. “You knew someone wanted him dead – you knew that someone actively tried to kill him! How the fuck did you let this happen?”

“Merlin, I don’t know how much Mordred told you before you were arrested, but we are in the process of trying to uncover a number of officers that we believe are corrupt. For obvious reasons, we haven’t been able to brief everyone. It was my understanding that the officers I posted to protect Mr Pendragon were clean. I had personally mentored them. Please know that if I had had the slightest suspicion otherwise they wouldn’t have been placed anywhere near that room.”

“Yeah that’s great and all but that doesn’t change the fact that my boyfriend is missing or hurt or… or worse and it’s your incompetence that made it possible. God and when were you planning to tell me? After he showed up dead somewhere?”

Merlin’s breath was growing shallow and panicky. He needed air. He needed out – to find Arthur before something awful happened to him. He could just walk out. Why shouldn’t he? He wasn’t a suspect and Annis knew it. What possible repercussions could there be?

A moment after this thought crossed his mind, the door to the interrogation room was being opened again. Merlin was so relieved to see a friendly face, to see someone as confused and furious as he was that as soon as Mordred’s cuffs were unlocked, Merlin hugged him tightly, taking comfort in the warmth and understanding he found there and trying to radiate as much of it back as possible.

The tears were falling before he had time to think about stopping them.

Mordred put an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and led them to the table. Annis said nothing but offered Merlin a packet of tissues from her pocket which he reluctantly took.

“Has there been a new development? Is that why we’re both here?” Mordred asked, his voice tired and worn. Merlin wondered if he had slept at all since he found out about Kara’s death.

“We have security footage of what appears to be an as of yet unidentified officer leading Arthur from his hospital room. Neither has been seen since then.”

Mordred looked as livid as Merlin felt, but instead of shouting his feelings as Merlin had, he simply folded his arms and waited for what Annis would say next.

“We have a team of analysts trying to identify the officer in the security footage which will give us a much clearer idea of what happened. In the meantime, our hope is that DI Aredian will lead us to wherever Arthur is being held. Mordred, the reason I called you here is that we need to find out what Kara knew. We have been from the bottom to the top of her flat and we can’t find anything that would drive Agravaine to have her killed.”

“We wanted out,” said Mordred. “We were planning to break our contracts with him.”

“Yes, I understand that,” Annis replied, “but what I don’t understand is why Agravaine would take the dangerous route of having Kara killed instead of just tanking your careers like he threatened to. He doesn’t strike me as the type to make life more difficult for himself than it needs to be. Then there’s his excuse for all those calls between him and Kara that day. I don’t think the story about the article is as made up as we once believed it was.”

“Are you saying that Kara was planning to publish something on Agravaine?” asked Merlin. “Why wouldn’t she just publish it then? Why call him up about it?”

“She must have been using it as a bargaining chip to guarantee that Agravaine would leave us alone,” said Mordred, now paler than he had been a moment ago, “and she buried it when she realised that Agravaine was far more likely to get rid of her than negotiate with her.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Annis agreed. She shuffled through the pages of the file in front of her, finally pulling out a copy of Kara’s suicide note – the one Mordred had showed him a photo of. This time, Merlin saw that the line “p.s. we’ll always have paris – x” was underlined and that “paris” was circled with two enormous question marks scrawled next to it. “This is the only line of Kara’s note that still doesn’t make sense to me. Based on the composition of the rest of her note, it seems too casual and superficial to not be intentional. With that in mind, can you please tell me what significance Paris played in your relationship?”

“I’ve told you – it’s where we went for our honeymoon,” Mordred replied as if the memory of it caused him physical pain to recall. “I don’t understand why she couldn’t have just been leaving me a reminder of what was probably the last time either of us was truly happy.”

Annis was quiet for a moment and spoke her next sentence as if measuring each word.

“Of course that’s what she was doing on one level, but your wife has proven that she was a masterful writer. Every word, every letter and punctuation mark in this letter is intentional and right now the only part of it we haven’t deciphered is this line. It may be the clue that leads us to her dirt on Agravaine, so I need you to really think – was there perhaps an inside joke or personal story the two of you shared that was linked to Paris?”

“None that immediately spring to mind,” said Mordred. “And it would be kind of pointless for her to leave a secret message about something I can’t remember, not so?”

“Very well,” said Annis, reaching down next to her for a box. “Here’s another idea. These are all items from her flat that have any connection to Paris or France. Is there anything in here that tells you anything?”

She handed Mordred a pair of latex gloves which he pulled on before gently removing the contents of the box one by one with trembling hands. There was nothing too thrilling amongst the seemingly random assortment of objects: a set of car keys with an Eiffel Tower key ring, a mug that bore the slogan ‘reste calme et parlons Français’ on a background of the French flag, a glittering snow globe containing a miniature Notre Dame and a men’s “Paris Je T’aime” t-shirt. So when Mordred removed the final item, a simple wooden jewellery box, and Merlin was hit with a wave of nostalgia at the sight, he couldn’t help but gasp.

“You recognise it?” said Annis, her brow furrowing in confusion as she handed Merlin a pair of gloves so that he could handle it.

“Not this one exactly,” said Merlin, noting that the design differed slightly. Where Kara’s box had the Eiffel Tower burnt onto the top of it, the one Merlin had known had had the Palace of Versailles instead. “My best friend had a box like this growing up. He got it when his mum passed away. We used to use it to hide all of our contraband. You know… like sweets and stuff.”

Annis raised a suspicious eyebrow and Merlin felt his ears grow hot under her gaze. It was probably best not to admit to his teenage drug use in front of the police. He hastily finished pulling on his gloves and took the box gently from Mordred.

“Anyway, if I’m right and this is the same kind of box, there’s a false bottom to it. I just need to…” Merlin opened the hinged lid and slid the front face of the box up to reveal the slot for the false bottom. He was right. Gently, he reached into the box and slid out the thin sheet of wood that formed the bottom, gasping at the sight of a flash drive padded with socks to keep it from rattling.

“Oh my god, that has to be it,” said Mordred, staring at it with wide eyes. “That has to be the Agravaine story.”

“There’s only one way to find out,” said Annis, standing up abruptly from the desk and addressing the officer standing against the wall. “Daira, please take all this back to the evidence room. I’m taking Mr Emrys and Mr Jones to my office.”

“Of course Ma’am,” Daira replied, immediately stepping over to the table and pulling on a pair of gloves.

“Follow me,” said Annis, leading them out of the interrogation room and down one or two indistinguishable corridors until they arrived at an office with the words ‘Detective Chief Inspector Katherine Annis’ emblazoned across the window. Annis hastily unlocked the office door and practically threw herself into her seat, plugging in the flash drive as she did. A few moments later, her eyes widened. “It’s all here. Oh my god, she was an absolute genius.”

She beckoned Mordred and Merlin to stand on her side of the computer and showed them what she was seeing. It was almost beyond belief. There were files upon files of evidence she had collected over the years – conversations that she had recorded both in person and over the phone (including the most recent ones between her and Agravaine on the day of her death), copies of her articles before and after Agravaine had distorted them into near fiction, folders full of incriminating photos and video footage and finally, a file entitled ‘My Deal with the Devil’ which Merlin realised must be the article that had led to her death.

“Open it,” said Mordred.

“Mordred, are you sure?” said Merlin, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Won’t it be distressing for you?”

“She wants it to be read so that’s what I’m going to do,” he said, setting his jaw.

“I want to read it too, so for the sake of time I’ll read it out loud,” said Annis, opening the file.

In the most laughably unfunny and ironic way, this story (which was supposed to be my ticket to freedom and a life that actually belongs to me), has turned out to be my death sentence. You have to know that, off the bat, when I first sat down to type these words, to tell this story, it was with the mindset that I would finally be able to escape and stop living this lie in which I’m trapped. And while it’s possible that the threats of murder and rape that have been set to me in the past few hours might not come to anything, if you are reading this now, you know now what this man is capable of.

Agravaine Du Bois is the devil and I am one of the fools who sold their soul for his lies.

I am not alone in this – just the first to actually have their soul demanded from them. Du Bois, unassuming as he seems at first glance, is a master manipulator with numerous flies trapped in his web of deceit, including the one person I love more than life itself. It is for his sake now that I lay out this demon’s many sins. It’s too late for me, I know that now, but I’m hoping that by some grace I don’t deserve, he won’t suffer the same fate.

But I am getting ahead of myself.

In the beginning, there was a young man and the young woman who fell in love with him. Some would argue that we were too young – even we concede as much on nights when we drink and bitterly mutter about how different things might have been. Back then I was the practical, repressed, self-righteous result of an upbringing that taught me that life was a set of rules and consequences for breaking them. How then could my head not be turned by the beautiful, poetic mind of Mordred Owen, who believed wholeheartedly that life was a set of experiences and that the only lasting consequence life had to offer was regret at not taking every chance at adventure that life handed him?

Kara then began her beautifully woven telling of Mordred’s story from a few mornings ago, and Merlin felt his mind about her change. They really had just been two scared and exhausted kids who wanted a chance at a better life. Everything that followed, all the bile and wretchedness, was all Agravaine’s doing.

Mordred and I suffered this new adventure gladly. Though our time together was limited and highly clandestine, we both took comfort in the fact that the other was doing what they had always dreamed of. Despite the unusual emptiness of my bed, I rested well each night in the knowledge that my husband was finally being recognised for the musical and lyrical genius he was and that our time apart was only for a season while Du Bois set Mordred’s name up in lights.

In my naivety, when signing the contract to give Du Bois final say in the articles I published, I had thought that he had meant it from a place of wanting to offer me additional inside information from the many whispers of the industry to which he was privy. And, to his credit, it started that way. When I wrote my first scathing article about Catrina West making waves for all the wrong reasons, Du Bois supplied me with a seemingly endless supply of evidence that she had lip-synched her way through every single one of her live performances, leading to her fall from grace and my ascent to a position as one of the most prolific celebrity journalists in the UK.

It only escalated from there. Lives have been ruined by the biting words typed at my hand and the further malicious twisting of the truth at Du Bois’. It became increasingly difficult to separate my work and hatred of it from my personality and before long I found myself using my spiteful words as an outlet for my anger and frustration. This, of course, doesn’t excuse the things I’ve written, I am still responsible for not stopping this madness earlier, but you have to understand that this is what Du Bois does. He twists everything so that you eventually forget that you are being coerced into being the villain and actually begin to feel like you are the villain.

My husband was going through the same thing. His forced available bachelor act was beginning to weigh on him and Du Bois’ insistence that he should flirt but never touch made things all the worse. We would steal an evening or two together where we could, but for the most part, we were both incredibly lonely and miserable. The initial glamour of our new lives had worn off and now all either of us wanted to do was go back to what we had known before.

Mordred was the first to crack. In a moment of pure bravery (or stupidity) he insisted that he had been ‘single’ long enough to market himself and it was about time he got to be with his wife again, even if he had to pretend that it was a brand new relationship. Du Bois’ reaction was a malevolent chuckle and condescending ‘we’ll see’. It later transpired that this meant that Agravaine had no intention of letting Mordred be with anyone if it didn’t suit his purposes. And this, in turn, meant that Du Bois fully intended to exploit Mordred’s sexuality.

Despite having to keep it quiet for most of his career, Mordred has never been shy about being bisexual, insisting that it’s just one of many aspects of what makes him who he is. Without Du Bois’ interference, it would never have occurred to him to keep it quiet. Du Bois had other ideas about what would be a deal breaker for his audience and being open about his sexuality was one of them. Besides, didn’t he think that the mystery was so much more fun than the truth? Wasn’t the ambiguity and implication more fun to talk about than the bare black-and-white facts?

This philosophy didn’t last long and Du Bois’ first foray into forcing Mordred into a relationship came with Arthur Pendragon. It was the first of many relationships, both sexual and non-sexual, that my husband had absolutely no say in.

This may seem a shock to those who understand Agravaine Du Bois to be the brother of the late Ygraine Du Bois and therefore Arthur’s seemingly doting uncle, but Du Bois’ relationship with Arthur is insidious to the point of emotionally abusive. To contextualise it, it must be understood that when Ygraine died Du Bois was fully under the impression that he would be inheriting Avalon Records, which at the time was a highly successful independent record label. Instead, Avalon Records was bequeathed to Arthur with Du Bois’ managing it until he came of age. Though the slow decline of the record label has often been attributed to its dated practices and refusal to remain relevant, Du Bois has admitted in so many words (clips available at www.karaknows.com/my-deal-with-the-devil) that he deliberately mismanaged the label so that Arthur’s inheritance would turn out to be far more curse than blessing. Indeed, by the time Arthur inherited it, it was nearly unsalvageable and despite managing to scrape a few more years out of it, Avalon Records closed its doors for good in summer 2009, shortly before Uther Pendragon’s untimely death.

Mordred was one of the first artists signed to Pendragon’s new venture, Excalibur Records, which he began in late 2007 to allow himself the freedom to sign fresh new acts that actually had a half-decent chance of being successful. It was a match made in music heaven. Mordred’s soulful folk was set to put Excalibur Records on the map, which was precisely the opposite of what Excalibur’s new PR Manager, Du Bois, wanted and his subsequent plan to derail it was brutally simple. He would organise a contract buyout with another label, but before that, cause a public relations nightmare that would take Excalibur down with it.

Du Bois had, what was in his mind, the perfect recipe for disaster. He had two handsome, lonely men (one touch-starved and contractually forbidden from being in a relationship and the other desperately repressed and unable to convincingly deny the rumours that he was gay) plus a set of small confined offices where they would see each other every day for hours at a time. All he needed to do was prod Mordred towards Arthur and the tentatively stacked dominos would collapse one after the other.

Merlin put an arm around Mordred as Annis read Kara’s account of Agravaine’s emotional and psychological abuse. It sounded like hell and Merlin realised how lucky he was to only have a black eye to show for their conflict.

That, and an injured and missing boyfriend who was almost murdered, jeered a chillingly malicious voice that sounded an awful lot like Agravaine’s. We mustn’t forget that.

Annis continued reading.

Apart from forced libel and near prostitution, I could go into detail on the extensive list of Du Bois heinous crimes here. There are many. There’s his rumoured embezzlement of Avalon’s Finances (which I would not be surprised to see replicated in the recent financial failings of the once booming Excalibur); his manipulation and coercion of Cenred King and Valiant Wright into carrying out his dirty work, throwing the lives of the band and those connected to them into turmoil; the skilful masterminding of Mordred’s first highly public and completely fake relationship with Merlin Emrys without Merlin being aware of it; for getting Sophia Timor pregnant, blaming it on Arthur and cruelly abandoning her when she stopped being of use to him. I could list the details, but there is simply no longer any time. For that, you will have to visit the aforementioned website and confront the overwhelming evidence for yourself.

There is no more time.

It is here, staring down the barrel of this metaphorical gun that I wish to personally apologise to anyone whom I might have hurt with my biting words and insensitive lack of discretion. Were it up to me alone, many of the things that are now known about you would have remained a tight-lipped secret and many of the rumours that were unfairly spread about you would never have seen the light of day. I take full responsibility for my actions and know that had I been a bit braver, your lives might be very different now. I know I have made a great many enemies and rightly so, but I hope you realise that with freedom over my talents, I would have put them to far better use. I would have been investigating a character like Du Bois as an objective third party. Instead, I am a part of his twisted truth.

Now as part of that truth, knowing that I will not survive the fall, I am dismantling my section of the web and praying the rest unravels with it.

My last words are for the one person to whom it physically pains me to have to say goodbye.

Mordred my love, if you managed to find this and are reading it now, know that I would never trade a single moment that was spent with you. I love you more than any words I put here could possibly express, even if I did have all the time in the world. You don’t feature in a single one of my regrets except that we didn’t get the eighty or so years together it felt like we should have been promised.

Even though I’m afraid, I’m alright now. I’m at peace knowing that even when I’m still, I won’t be silenced. I take solace in knowing that if I’m going down, I’m taking the son of a bitch who ruined your life with me.

Be brave and carry on for me. I know you don’t always see it, but you are a gift to this world. Go show every other practical, repressed, self-righteous little girl and boy that magic is real. That they can be anything they want to be. That they don’t have to settle for being successful, that they can be something far greater – they can be good.

And once I have paid my devil his debt, I too will finally be good.

A chill ran down Merlin’s spine as he opened his arms to envelope Mordred. Enormous silent sobs were racking his body and Merlin felt that if he didn’t hold him, Mordred would shake apart. Tears were stinging his own eyes and even Annis was pulling a tissue across hers.

Kara’s words had cut to the heart of the tragedy that this was. No one in this story had asked to be a part of it. They were the victims of a sociopath who cared nothing for anyone’s interests but his own.

“Right, I’m copying the contents of this drive to my computer and then you two are coming with me.”

“Where are we going?” asked Mordred in a hollow, distant voice. It was gut-wrenching and raw and Merlin felt almost physically ill at the grief of it.

“I think it’s about time Sophia Timor finally had the opportunity to tell the truth.”

[change-the-rules]

FROM ONE PIKACHU TO ANOTHER sidenote do they play pokemon in the au do they have fave pokes. also i can't wait for alex and maggie to meet and realize they're soulmates and to be like "ok but i'm still mad about the trex and feathers thing" and then forl ucy to come in like "guys theyve been dead for years"

oh oh dude okay so I hadn’t really thought about it in context of the soulmate au specifically so it hasn’t been mentioned and it probably won’t be but they totally do and on valentines day when Magie is like 6 she doodles a pokeball and some cheesy shit like I choose you to be my soulmate and it’s adorable.

Also that is totally like an ongoing ‘fight’ Alex and Maggie have, like Maggie actually took some paleontology classes for funsies and as an adult she actually thinks it’s really cool the kind of strides we’ve made in science and the hows and whys T-Rexes probably had feathers but then there’s the little kid nostalgia and Alex gets so worked about science facts so Maggie just ‘nope 15 years later and it’s still lame’ and they bicker endlessly about it 

And when Lucy is like ‘guys guess what? they’ve been dead for years, technically none of them have feathers anymore.’  

Maggie looks up at her with the biggest saddest eyes and Alex pouts because she was going to get Maggie to see reason this time but now look at how sad she is and Lucy is just jfc how did I end up with such nerds for soulmates and she has to go put on Jurassic Park 2 and cuddle with them(Jurassic Park is Maggie’s go to comfort movie but Jurassic Park: The Lost World  is Lucy’s ‘I fucked up by saying the dinosaurs were extinct to end an argument so now we have to watch a T-Rex rampage through San Diego to balance it out).

Sooooo….I got so carried away with various pokemon hcs that I had to put it under a cut….

I have so many poke hc’s for them in general but like I tend hc Maggie as a gamer, little Maggie growing up and she can’t afford to collect the cards but she loves the anime and eventually saves up enough to get a gameboy color. Her first game is red and she plays it so many times she practically wears out the cartridge. She’s the first person (and only for awhile) in blue springs to catch Mew. She eventually collects and plays all the games and she’s a complete expert on all the glitches and secrets. 

Alex was more of a casual fan she watched the anime sometimes but Vicky liked playing the games so Alex asked her parents to buy her a gameboy color and trading pokemon on the playground is probably the most social Alex ever was without alcohol.

She did really REALLY get into collecting the cards though and at one point Maggie and Alex visit Eliza in Midvale and Alex’s room is as she left it. Maggie is having fun poking around and teasing Alex for her Xena memorabilia and Dana Scully and BtVS posters(seriously Danvers, Faith is practically eye-fucking the camera in that one across from your bed how did you not know)  when she finds the three thick Pokemon card binders and freezes. Alex notices and grabs them like I totally forgot I had these and she starts flipping through one reminiscing and handing another to Maggie and Maggie almost shits herself because Alex has a first edition base set holo Charizard, she has all the starters, she has all the original 151 cards in various editions from different series and collections , She has holos, she has Japanese cards, she has shining cards. Kara ends up stopping by because I could hear Maggie’s erratic heart rate from National city and ‘holy shit is everyone okay?’ 

Alex’s attachment to the cards is more nostalgia than anything so she’s like you can have them if you want, Maggie almost has a heart attack. Of course she refuses those cards are worth more than she makes in a month but Alex brings them back to National City and they just kind of end up ‘Maggie’s’ anyway.

Lucy collected the cards too but she actually played the trading card game. Being an army brat could be isolating but pokemon in the 90s was inescapable and it was something to do on any base, in any school she ended up in for awhile. Lucy played to win and for keeps and she ended up with her own pretty decent collection of cards even though hers aren’t nearly in the kind of mint condition Alex’s are in. Maggie still hyperventilates sometimes if she catches sight of the 5 card binders on the bookcase(Alex organized Lucy’s collection from an old shoebox into binders of their own). 

For her birthday Lucy and Alex get Maggie an unopened special edition pokemon gameboy color from the yellow bundle. She cries because she had wanted that one more than anything as a kid but couldn’t afford it and they spend the night cuddled up together playing pokemon on their gameboys like the nerds they are. 

Maggie and Winn stay up all night outside gamestop for the 20th aanniversary red and blue 3ds bundle.  

Maggie’s ultimate fav is Bulbasaur she remembers watching the anime and wishing she had one to protect her from the bullies and eventually she gets older and decides she may never have a Bulbasaur but she can be one for others. 

She has a bunch of favorites though including pikachu (she will physically fight anyone who says something about anyone not being a ‘real fan’ because pikachu is too famous or popular a pokemon), Aerodactly, Kabuto(her first body on the beach she sees a horseshoe crab and has to try really hard not to lose her shit because she’s from landlocked nebraska, and she is looking a kabuto and basically it’s an effort to remind herself that she is a newly promoted detective that needs to get her shit together) Tauros, Nidoqueen, Donphan, Tyranitar(basically if it’s vaguely dino-like she has a soft spot but dragons can go either way stemming from her childhood belief they arent as cool as dinos), Mightyena, Groudon, alright I’m going to stop but she develops favorites in each gen.

Alex meanwhile is staunchly first gen and she and Maggie bicker about constantly. 

Alex tended to favor water pokemon but not exclusively some of her faves Lapras, Vaporeon, Porygon, Starmie, Dratini, Ninetails, Abra/Alakazam and Onix. She also has a secret soft spot for Togepi as well as Espeon and Umbreon who she thinks of kind of like her and Kara, sun and moon and argues that they still technically count as 1st gen because they’re eevee evolutions. 

Lucy is mostly only really familiar with the first gen and some of the second but she doesn’t really care either way and will choose sides based on maximum amusement for the moment. Some of her favs include Squirtle/Blastoise, Arcanine, Pidgeot, Nidoking, Machamp, Lickitung, Gyarados, Flareon.

And well Alex is a BIOengineer and she studies alien physiology and genetic engineering and if anyone was going to ‘accidentally’ create real life pokemon it would be her okay.

(mostly I just really think J'onn needs a Ditto…..)

And I was talking about this with nerdsbianhokie ages ago and they pointed out that Alex has seen Jurassic Park enough times to know to not create large creatures that can kill humans and would probably go with the mini-zoo variety and then they blessed me with the mental image of a tiny little Ditto riding on J'onn’s shoulder.

Vasquez would end up making obligatory pocket size jokes that they don’t even pretend aren’t about Maggie and Lucy. They’d only stop when Alex threatens to withhold the actual mini pocket monsters from them and even then only when They’re within ear shot of Alex.

The spacefam ending up with mini-pokemon protectors. Maggie gets her fucking Bulbasaur and everyone cries. 

And then my dude I have not even touched on pokemon go hc’s

Kara blowing an entire paycheck on upgrading her pokemon storage because she can’t bring herself to turn any of her duplicates into candy and she needs to catch every single pokemon she sees. She has like a thousand pidgeys at this point.

Nerdsbianhokie was like but Kara being upset that she flies too fast for the app.

And Alex/Maggie/Lucy? Pokemon go would be terrible and awesome for those competitive nerds. They have zero shame.

Lucy exploits her military contacts, her and Alex abuse DEO resources, Alex makes Kara fly her around the world to get the region locked pokemon. 

After Lucy came back from a ‘work trip’ in Asia with a Farfetch’d,  Alex made Kara take the day off and wouldn’t let them go home til she had multiple Farfetch'ds, Kangeshkans, and Mr. Mimes. 

Maggie tries to keep up but detecting only gets her so far. She does have a network of ppl who are the type to text the location of a Lapras at 3am.When Kara realizes the edge Lucy and Alex have she starts exclusively helping Maggie. 

Alex is completely overdramatic like my own sister, MY OWN SISTER pretending to pretend to make a huge production about loyalty. And Kara’s just like ‘I’m just being fair besides Lucy and Maggie are my sisters too at this point’ and Alex just melts. She also gets Winn to build her a long range Jet pack into the kryptonite suit in an attempt and get back on top of the game but she’s melty while doing it. 

Winn Mr.tech genius manages to get himself banned from ‘suping’ up his account and has to start over at level 21. He cries.

As repayment for not commenting upon the melty-ness during the jet pack building Alex takes his phone with her on flights since he had to start over. Of course, being Alex she doesn’t actually say this she just sort of punches his arm in thanks, steals the phone and drops it back into his lap later with a few eggs hatched, some new pokemon and a full items inventory.

Lucy realizes she’s the only one currently unable to fly which oh hell no so she starts scheming. 

‘Director Lane, did you requisition military resources for a video game?’  'Of course not, it’s an app.’ (via nerdsbianhokie)

Vasquez is the first to get the original 151….All of them… no one understands, they have no obvious hacks, seemingly haven’t left North America, Ditto is still a spoty rumor at that point and Mewtwo is confirmed as not yet available or even programed and yet… Vasquez has them. When anyone asks They deflect and says you should see my wife’s.

Erin is level 48 way too early in the game.She has a Mew. Everyone is kinda of scared of them after learning about it, the true power couple.

No one ever figures out how they did it. 

J’onn just wants his agents to behave like professionals and bans non-related phone use during working hours after seven agents ran away from their posts to catch a Charizard. He’s in the middle of lecturing them when Lucy and Alex stroll in like did you guys see that Charizard?!

(Kara downloaded the app to his phone and J’onn totally caught the Charizard)

James takes pictures of the gang doing absolutely ridiculous things while trying the catch pokemon and it becomes a meme.

There’s a gym (The D.E.O was also accidently made a gym what no Vasquez and Winn had nothing to do with that what are you talking about) accessible from Alex’s apartment and it’s a bloodbath because they’re all on different teams, Maggie-Instinct, Lucy-Valor and Alex-Mystic.

Just yea……uhmmm this all got away from me *shrugs sheepishly*

[thejpfdude-blog]

The Upcoming Fall 2017 Shows I’ll Be Watching

WHAT? Yes, I’m back! Long time no see. I’ve been busy with school, so unfortunately I have a huge list of episodes to watch (that let’s be honest, I’ll probably never get to).

But yeah, hopefully I’ll be able to start writing TWiA posts again and start watching stuff on a weekly basis. To start that off, there’s this post: the annual “looking at what shows I’m watching this season post”.

A reminder of the usual thing I say in these posts:

I might watch some other shows that are good or drop some shows if they aren’t good, but that’s for the future.

Like always, I’m organizing these shows into three categories: Full Chance are shows I’m giving the whole season towards, Short Leash are shows I’m giving three or so episodes towards, and One Shot are shows I’m giving one episode towards. As we progress towards categories, expect less words for each anime as I lose interest in writing. Also a reminder that MAL links to the shows are on the titles for those interested.

Before we start, a general comment about next season: it’s honestly looking pretty bare for somebody like me who likes them slice-of-lifes/comedies/romances/moe shows. Other than the few shows I have on Full Chance, there’s nothing I have a shred of hope towards. Even some of the Full Chance shows are questionable to me to be honest. But hey, some shows could still be good, and I’ll go into more detail about that below. So with that let’s get started with this post, starting with...

Full Chance Shows

Kino no Tabi: The Beautiful World - The Animated Series: Well, I tried to watch the original show from 2003, but that was during my blue period. But apparently it’s okay, because this show’s actually a remake/sequel hybrid thing. What I got from the info given to me was that it will adapt some new content, but it’ll also remake some of the stories from the original series. So not a full-on sequel, but not also a full-on remake either. A little of both.

Oh I should probably say what this show is about. Well it’s kinda hard to describe. The best way I can put it is that it’s an adventure about a girl (who I thought was a guy) and her talking motorcycle traveling throughout the world, experiencing many distinct places. Sounds boring, right? But from the one episode I watched, it was actually super interesting. Now this show doesn’t offer much in terms of action, but it’s a nice relaxing watch that occasionally really makes you think. It’s also episodic, if that concerns you. I would definitely recommend watching this, or starting off with the original series. After all, you still have time to catch up.

Love Live! Sunshine!! S2: Who woulda thunk: not even six months ago, I shunned anything idol. But now, this is honestly tied with Shokugeki S3 as my most anticipated anime of the season.

I feel like I shouldn’t really describe this show: after all, if you don’t know what it’s about, you probably shouldn’t be watching anyway since it’s a second season of a spinoff series (though I honestly find the spinoff to be better than the original anime-wise). Just know it can be described in two words: SCHOOL and IDOLS.

I’m not expecting this show to be great - after all, I’ve never scored any Love Lives higher than a 6. But I’m still expecting some fun slice-of-lifey moments that’ll be even better now that we have the full cast of 9 members doing their thing. And honestly, that’s all I want in a show sometimes. I also honestly expect some more increased drama similar to how S2 of the original series contrasted with S1, but hopefully the slice-of-lifey moments make up for that. I’m also secretly hoping this isn’t the final season of the anime, but guess we’ll find out about that.

Mahoutsukai no Yome (The Ancient Magus’ Bride): So this show looks super interesting. Plot-wise it doesn’t really look like my type of show, but digging deeper it sounds pretty cool.

Basically the story is that we have our main girl Chise who has no hope in her life only to meet a magus who makes an offer to her to be his apprentice and his bride (wowzers).

Sounds pretty fantasy, which isn’t really my schtick. But apparently from sources, I’ve heard this show is actually quite the opposite: it’s more a darker fairytale-like slice-of-life with a evolving narrative, which I’m all about. Plus the PV was pretty hype, so that’s nice. There are prequel OVAs already out, but I haven’t had the time to watch them yet, and they aren’t too necessary to watch before watching the main series. Still, go watch them if you’re interested. I might do the same.

Osake wa Fuufu ni Natte kara: So this is one of the few times where I can say that I read the source material before the anime came out (hopefully I can say the same later when Kaguya Wants to Be Confessed To gets an anime...). The best way I can describe this show is Alcoholism: The Anime.

Well, not really, but it’s pretty much like that. The main character is a reserved office worker who likes drinking alcohol. Unfortunately she becomes cute when she does so (oh no the horror) so she only drinks the concoctions that her husband makes. Some cute stuff, and if the manga’s any indication it’ll be a nice short watch. Already confirmed to be a 5-minute short, which is good because honestly the manga doesn’t offer much other than an occasional “aw that’s cute I guess”. I’m not expecting much, because honestly the last few chapters were pretty eh for me. Plus I don’t know how well the manga’ll translate into anime. Well still somewhat excited for a nice little short.

Shokugeki no Soma S3: So, it has come. After season 2 my hype for this died down a little, and so I’m cautiously excited about this installment. All that I’ll say is that as long as the show is able to balance the intense food battles with the funny slice-of-life moments, it’ll be a pretty good bet to be a favorite of the season. Though I am a bit worried that manga readers say that this portion of the story is when the manga started getting a bit questionable, hence the lack of hype for the show from said audience. I’m not too confident on that front though - details and all that are a bit unclear because I didn’t want to go into too many spoilers. But anyway, excited for some more food porn.

Short Leash Shows

Animegataris: So the general gist of this show is that a new girl shows up and makes an anime research club in school, slowly getting more and more interested in the medium (boy I can relate). Though there is one thing that confuses me from the synopsis, and that’s this part: “while they stand against the student council's continuous efforts to disband their club, and they ignore the impending end of the world, they talk about anime...”. Uhh... yeah that seems like it was brushed under the rug... like what? That part makes this seem different from your typical high school show (a la Konobi). Interested to see what the whole deal is with that since nothing from the promotional images or the PV shows anything referencing that. Plus the fact that this is an anime original series means nobody knows what’s gonna happen. Though otherwise not too remarkable of a show, and I’m not expecting too much from this.

Blend S: Oh boy another CGDCT. My favorite. 

In all seriousness, I do like this genre, but I don’t know about this one... Basically at first glance it looks kinda like a GochiUsa style show, but it’s a bit different from that. Yes, there are cute girls working in a cafe. But this is a bit different: the girls working there play out a role: for instance, we have the main character playing the sadist role. There’s also the classics such as the tsundere, the imouto, and so on. A bit like a maid cafe actually. I think what’ll make or break this show for me is whether or not the girls keep up their roles outside of work, or if there’ll be times shown when they aren’t so... typecast. Sorta similar to one of my favorite YouTube channels out there, Cow Chop, where they obviously play out a role during their videos, but we can see times where they’re actually genuine in videos like the Behind The Scenes or their podcast. Other info is kinda limited since like Animegataris, this is an anime original show. So I guess we’ll see how it plays out.

Boku no Kanojo ga Majimesugiru Sho-bitch na Ken (My Girlfriend is a Faithful Virgin Bitch): Uhh I can explain. So I’ve been told this show is basically similar to Seitokai Yakuindomo where it’s Sex Jokes: The Anime. Basically a guy confesses to the most popular girl in school in desperation, and she accepts. Only this girl is pretty deadpan, and in an effort to be the perfect girlfriend she “optimizes” her behavior, usually too far on the sexual scale to the dismay of MC. Comedy ensues, and so on. I’ve read some snippets of the manga, and it’s your standard “person does random stupid thing and MC responds”, AKA the boke and tsukkomi routine. I’m not sure how well that’ll go considering I’ve seen complaints that it’s just endless gags, which the recent Aho Girl showed me I’m not really about. But hey I’ll give this show a chance, because who knows?

Just Because!: Why am I watching this? Just Because!

I’m so sorry.

Ok, with that out of the way this show looks decently interesting. Guy comes back to school as third year right as graduation approaches. Apparently this causes four students’ lives to change in some way. Sure.

Looks to be drama-y, based on the PV I saw, but I don’t know too much about this show otherwise. One thing I can say is that those uniforms are comfy as heck, and I’m all about that. Though I’m not all about the character designs: the faces look a bit questionable. But I’m sure I’ll get used to it. It’s not Koi to Uso levels of bad.

Konohana Kitan: Oh boy another CGDCT, but with wolf girls. Wow.

Okay well this time I’m not being sarcastic. I’m not about the wolf girls, cat girls, whatever girls trend. Basically it’s your standard new girl comes to work at place, and slowly gets along with others. But apparently according to the synopsis it’s through “her simple cuteness“. No I’m not lying, go see the MAL page.

Well might as well give it a shot I suppose.

One Shot Shows

Juuni Taisen: Normally I wouldn’t usually watch these types of shows, but a friend of mine convinced me to give at least one episode to this one. Sort of a battle royale where 12 people who share names with the Chinese zodiac members fight for one wish. One interesting thing to note is that this was written by Nisioisin, the same guy who wrote the Monogatari series. So from that it has some good potential.

Kujira no Kora wa Sajou ni Utau: At this point I’m kinda getting tired, so I’ll just say this is a fantasy show. The PV looked super interesting though, which is the biggest reason why I’m giving this at least one episode.

RoboMasters the Animated Series: College students + RoboMasters competition = anime? Sure why not.

And that’s all for this post! Not as many shows as last season, but I think there are some potentially good ones in this batch, plus maybe some more that I haven’t listed here. Anyway, thanks for reading, and I’ll see you in the next post!