#love and be loved
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floweycidal · 3 months ago
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the whole thing's devastating in itself, but would you guys believe me if i told you this part specifically makes me so super sad
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flowey doesn’t allow himself to feel the snow. not really. he won’t talk about how the cold steadies him, or how it stirs memories of simpler times. he avoids thinking about the quiet. the way the world slows down under the weight of winter, how everything feels softer, almost bearable.
the peace feels too close. too easy.
thoughts like that aren’t for him. perhaps they never were. they belong to someone else. and flowey doesn’t get to be him. not anymore.
so, instead, he ignores it. kills it in its infancy. turns away from the idea before it drags up pieces of a life he refuses to remember. he acts like happiness isn’t something that should happen to him. a mistake. an error in the system that needs to be corrected.
there’s always this jaggedness to his words, something sharp enough to keep anything tender at bay. if something feels good, he cuts it down to size—turns it bitter, spits it back out as cruelty. it’s instinct by now, as natural as breathing.
that’s what flowey does. he tears things apart before they can convince him he deserves more. after all, it’s much easier to laugh at the world than to feel it.
this is just the way things are. the way they have to be.
the softness never feels right anyway. it’s awkward, like trying to cup water in clenched fists. like touching something delicate with hands meant only to destroy.
he’s flowey. he has to be flowey. and flowey doesn’t get to savor things. he doesn’t stop to enjoy the way the snow hushes the world or let the cold bite just enough to remind him he’s alive.
he knows better.
there's almost comfort in that. in shutting things down, in turning them brittle before they can take root. it’s neat. predictable. safe. no dangerous hope worming its way into places it doesn’t belong. no warmth overstaying its welcome. just the same old ache he’s carried for as long as he can remember—steady, familiar, dull.
manageable.
because if he let something good in… what then?
would it stay? refuse to leave? would it start to matter?
would he start to matter?
flowey knows exactly who he is. the villain. the failure. the one who tried to make things right and only made it worse. if there was ever a chance to be anything else, it’s long gone. whatever good might have existed in him has been buried beneath years of mistakes, smothered by everything he couldn’t save.
he had a plan once. a way to undo it all. make things right again. but it didn’t work. he didn’t work. he couldn’t save chara. couldn't save the monsters.
couldn’t even save himself.
and this… this is what’s left.
flowey. the version of him that learned to survive by not needing anything. the one who gave up on hope, joy, and peace because letting them in would mean the walls he built were never needed at all.
it would mean that somewhere inside, there’s still something soft. something worthy.
and he doesn’t know how to live with that. he’s not even sure he wants to.
control is all that makes sense anymore. he decides when the pain comes, how much, and from whom. he decides. no one else.
he’s built everything on that control—this image of who he’s supposed to be, what he’s supposed to feel. but what if he stopped? what if he let the bitterness go? what would be left?
just asriel?
and what would that mean? that there had always been another way?
no. he can’t let that be true.
so he copes. he compartmentalizes. keeps things boxed up neatly. flowey and asriel. good. evil. pain. hope. life. death. they don’t touch. they’ll never touch. he’d lose control if they did. and control is all he has left.
he makes sure to break things down before they have the chance to become anything real. he’s always the one to close the door first—better to leave than to be left behind.
if not, he might remember what it’s like to be exposed. vulnerable. weak.
and that’s something he cannot accept. the possibility that asriel is still in there. that there’s still a way back.
that maybe… he was never as far gone as he wants to believe.
it’s almost funny, in a way, because he’s already changed, whether he knows it or not. the fact that he’s still here, still witnessing the world after everything that’s happened, proves he’s not as detached as he wants to believe.
the fighting stopped. the cycle ended. the monsters are free. and even if he won’t admit it, even if he’s not ready to come to terms with it—there’s a quiet kind of peace in that.
even so, he will dig in his heels. even so, he will play into the role in a war that’s long over. even so, he won’t let anything awaken the barest trace of what it once meant to be asriel.
he is flowey.
the snow will keep falling. it’ll land on his petals.
it doesn’t stay.
neither does he.
because it’s easier that way.
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anashell · 9 months ago
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Happy birthday, David Tennant! Be happy every second of your unique life! Love and be truly loved by each other. You are very cool and your victories and achievements make us happy. I wish you to remember that life is one and it is not endless. So live a bright and loving life filled with mutual love. Against all odds. Be happy, our beloved dark Duke!
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stephy-gold · 8 months ago
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Just need someone to hold me while I cry for everything that hurts without making questions
Just hold me until I feel lighter, until it stops hurting, until I stop bleeding
Just please, just hold me like my life depends on it, because it does
I’m drowning in my own tears
Because I’m feeling so alone and stressed and when the moon shine at night my ghosts come out from the shadows to haunt me and I cry for everything
At this point I would believe that are not tears left to cry but oh god ! Thats a lie, that’s wrong since I can still cry like the first time
With all my soul pouring through my eyes, letting out the grief that I feel
So please make me feel loved and safe
Just hold me until the world stops and I could rest
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glowupig · 1 year ago
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I feel so full of love and hope today. The sun is shining, the world feels calmer, and even though I have a long day ahead of me I have so much to look forward to in every season of my future.
This spring will be full of hiking and sitting beside the river, picking flowers and riding my bike to the library and the gym
In the summer my friends and I will have picnics on the beach and I’ll go camping with my family, and there will be ice cream dates and late nights under the stars
In the autumn there will be walks full of the crunching of leaves, cool evenings bundled up on my balcony with a cup of tea and a book of poetry
And when winter comes again, there will be friends and family and kind words from strangers.
It’s taken me years to get here but I can finally say with full certainty that life is worth living and loving!! The sum of my future is worth so much more than the sadness of my past.
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daily-spooky · 14 days ago
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staff: our april fools joke this year is a silly feature that doesn't really do anything but give you a button to boop other users! they have to opt-in first though :)
me:
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caats · 9 months ago
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skipppppy · 4 months ago
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I think she’d respect his methodology
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sunsbleeding · 6 months ago
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delsincloud · 20 days ago
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ur-daily-inspiration · 8 months ago
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Happy Pride Month
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bearrverine · 14 days ago
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me and gang at the haunted house
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heckyeahponyscans · 7 months ago
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I watched the "hyper realistic" version of "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" on Youtube and I was not ready for the utter lack of emotions from the CGI animals.
Nala looking concerned about Simba hiding something about his past, a comparison:
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Also, in the CGI version this song called "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" does not take place at night.
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twinliches · 8 months ago
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i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.
this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.
anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:
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marisatomay · 8 months ago
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This Pride I hope that all of you never ever forget that no amount of sanitizing your sex life or sanding down of your LGBT edges will make bigots accept you. So, don’t debase yourself by capitulating an inch to them, especially in ways that throw your fellow community members under the bus.
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