#louden swain fanart

[electromignion]

Bridgewater “inktober” 5: Tea 🍵

Here’s Jeremy Bradshaw enjoying his tea!! Probably in the morning before going to work (as his teabag says good morning 🫶) 🤧 I don’t know why today I had a vision being: Jeremy wearing a turtleneck jumper and what was a 15 min quick sketch for the flat colours became a 4 hours drawing bdbdjdjd

I still headcanon Jeremy as not liking things being tight around his neck because of sensory issues, so to me it’s because our guy is cold with a beginning of sore throat, and also that the neck part is quite loose so not fully against his skin (I feel him a lot)

I did the design of the mug inspired by the Bridgewater official merch both the hitchhiking pin and also the blue purplish forest one, and added cryptids to the design and the Bridgewater lettering! And yes this is another mug from the huge mug collection Jeremy has, I think he might’ve bought this one himself, thinking it was funny enough

And also previous headcanons are there like the aroace bracelet that I want to believe that Anne was the one who gave it to him; and also the old piercing mark on his lobe as when he was a teenager/young adult he had piercings for his rebel era against his step father and his mother’s choices (cf previous drawings I did of young!Jeremy). Once again, thanks a LOT to @rockinglibra for the prompt list I appreciate it a lot 💜

[alexiescherryslurpy]

A recent simple digital drawing of Rob Benedict

I say ‘simple’ but this took some time , I’ve been trying to improve my line work so it was layers of sketches each getting slightly neater as it progressed and erasing unnecessary complexity

[natasha-cole]

1. Amazing

2. Ready Steady

3. She Waits

4. Better

5. Honey Bee

[crushing83]

Two more veggies for the collection. Matt Corn-en and Ruthie Red Hot.

Now, I’ve got to decide on some other characters... it’s getting haaaarder to match people to veggies.

[atc74]

Honey Bee

Square(s) Filled: Michael!Dean for @heavenandhellbingo and Angst to Fluff for @spngenrebingo

Warnings: Slight canon divergence, Daddy!Dean, angel possession, threats to loved ones, Dean giving up, perseverance, loved ones never giving up, fluff. It’ll hit you in the feels. 

Summary: Michael has taken over Dean’s mind and body, but Dean makes a deal to let him spend one last day with his family, so he can be there for his daughter on her big day. 

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Characters: Dean, Michael!Dean, Reader, Sam, Audrey Winchester (daughter OC)

Word Count: 1595

Written for: @heavenandhellbingo, @spngenrebingo, and @mrswhozeewhatsis​ 2019  Louden Swain FanFic FanArt Project

Beta’d by: @amanda-teaches, thank you for always being there when I need you, in more ways than one! Also a huge thanks and much love to my beautiful Boo, @iwantthedean​, for reading this over and boosting my confidence. Love you both to the moon!

A/N: I was taking a much needed break from cleaning this morning when Honey Bee started playing. While I love this song and have heard it a hundred times (or more), I took a moment to let the lyrics wash over me. 

As often happens, scenes flashed before my eyes and I knew this would make a terrific Daddy!Dean piece with the feels we didn’t know we needed. Sacrifice is not out of character for our fearless hunter, and I expect his child to fight as fearlessly as her Daddy.

Like Dean’s scent? Buy it here from @scentsfromthebunker!

“No! I am not walking down that aisle until my dad gets here!” Audrey shouted, startling her mother and Uncle Sam with her outburst. “He promised he’d be here and he hasn’t broken a promise to me yet. Not once!” 

“I know, baby. I know,” Y/N sighed, pulling her daughter into a tight embrace. 

The last few weeks had been hard on everyone, but especially on Audrey. Her wedding was the next day and her dad, Dean, was currently in parts unknown, possessed by the archangel Michael. 

~*~

“Daddy, don’t do this!” Audrey begged of her father as he faced off against the archangel. 

“Honey Bee, it’s the only way to defeat Lucifer,” Dean pulled her into his arms. “I’ll be back soon. I won’t miss it, I promise. You’re going to be the most beautiful bride.” 

“Daddy,” she cried, her head buried in the crook of his neck while he held her. 

~*~

It was dark, trapped in his own mind while the archangel went about experimenting and burning through monsters. 

“Let me out!” Dean screamed, banging his fists on the cage he was locked inside. 

“Not yet, Dean. I’ve got some business I need to take care of,” Michael tsked as he watched the vampire perish. “Too much grace I guess.” 

“Please, just let me go see my daughter. Then I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll be quiet if you just give me a day with her. Just one day. Please?” Dean begged from the recess of his cage. 

“Oh yes. Your little honey bee is to be wed, if I recall from your memories. She is a very pretty girl, Dean. I’m sure she’ll be very happy to see me there,” Michael chuckled as he went deep into Dean’s mind. 

~*~

“Daddy!” Audrey’s voice rang through the upper floors of Bobby’s house. Dean bound from his bed down the hall to her room. 

“Audrey, what’s wrong?” Dean burst into her room, the nightlight, combined with the dawn, casting shadows about the room. 

“The shadow man is here, Daddy,” she whimpered, crawling into Dean’s lap as he sat on the edge of her bed. 

“Shhh, Honey Bee, it’s okay. Daddy’s the only one here. There isn’t anyone else, even the shadow man,” Dean cooed softly, holding her head and rocking back and forth. “Let’s have some water, that usually does the trick, huh, Bee.” 

Y/N stood in the doorway, watching her husband and daughter. Within minutes, Audrey was sound asleep in his arms. He gently laid her down under the covers and walked over to his wife. 

“The shadow man?” she whispered

“Yeah, that’s the third time this month. I’m going to have Sammy check into it, but I’m sure it’s nothing. Just her imagination and the shadows playing tricks on it,” Dean kissed her, pulling her back down the hall to their room. “Let’s get a couple more hours, huh?”

~*~

“Your little honey bee is a special one, Dean,” Michael taunted. “I’ve got plans for her as well.” 

“You leave my family the hell alone! You’ve got me, you don’t need them!” Dean shouted. 

“Oh, Dean. How else will I get you to behave?” Michael laughed. 

“Give me one day with them, this Saturday, then you can have control back and I’ll do whatever the hell you want. Just give me twenty four hours, then you win,” Dean begged. 

“Twenty four hours, then you’re mine forever, Dean. But if you trick me, I will end them. All of them while I make you watch,” Michael laughed, locking Dean away once more. 

~*~

“Daddy! Look at me!” A three-year-old Audrey buzzed around the library, half dancing, half jumping in her bee costume. “I’m a honey bee!” 

“You are the cutest little honey bee that ever was, Bee!” Dean picked her up in his arms, tickling her as she squirmed. 

“Daddy, stop!” Audrey giggled, but she wrapped her hand tightly around her father’s neck. 

He tucked her into bed later that night, still wearing her yellow and black tutu. “I love you, Honey Bee.” 

“Love you too, Daddy,” Audrey yawned, her little fists rubbing tired eyes. “Don’t forget the nightlight.” 

“Never, Bee,” Dean promised, flipping the bee nightlight on as he exited her room. He turned back to see her snuggled up with her blanket.

Dean tried to remember back to a time before Y/N, before Audrey. And, for the life of him, he couldn’t recall what life was like without them and he knew now it didn’t matter. They were all that mattered to him. His girls and his brother and his baby. That was all he needed, all of them safe and sound. 

~*~

Dean woke suddenly at the world shifted around him. He was standing in front of the Bunker, still dressed in Michael’s stuffy clothes. 

“Twenty four hours, starting now, Dean. Don’t make me regret this, because if you do, the last thing you’ll see will be the mangled bodies of your family while the world burns around them. Do I make myself clear?” Michael preached inside his mind. 

“Crystal. Now leave me the hell alone, douchebag,” Dean commanded, knocking on the iron door. He composed himself as he waited. It felt like minutes had passed until he heard the slide of the heavy lock on the other side. The door swung open and he was greeted with a pistol and an angel blade, and his brother. “Hi ya, Sammy.”

“Dean?” Sam gasped, pulling his brother into a tight embrace. He didn’t know how, but he knew it was Dean, not Michael, despite the way he was dressed. “How? When? What are you doing here?”

“I made a deal for twenty four hours. I need to be here Sammy, then I gotta let him take me back,” Dean admitted, his face pinched at the thought of never seeing his family again, even if it meant they would be safe from Michael’s wrath.

“We’ll find a way, Dean,” Sam vowed. 

“No. If he thinks I’ve tricked him, he’ll kill all of you. And, I can’t have that. It’s better this way, Sammy,” Dean explained. 

“Better for who? Us or him?” The mumble carried up the staircase to Dean’s ears. 

“Y/N? God, you’re a sight for sore eyes, Sweetheart,” Dean beamed, seeing his wife for the first time in weeks. His long legs carried him down to her in seconds, reaching out his arms for her. 

“Don’t you ‘Sweetheart’ me, Winchester!” she shouted, poking him in the chest. 

“Ow!” Dean flinched. She always was stronger than she looked. 

“You think we’re just going to let you go without a fight? We’ve been looking everywhere for you, for any sign of you! And, you just show up here like it’s no big deal!” Y/N continued shouting at him. 

“I know, okay! I’ve done everything I can think of, this is the only way!” Dean retorted, ripping the stupid hat off his head. 

“There is always another way, Dean. You taught me that, now you’re ready to give up?” Y/N took a step forward, shoving him back again. 

Dean’s eyes flashed blue and he spoke. “Y/N, it’s a pleasure to see you in the flesh. You’re quite lovely. Now, I made Dean here a deal and I will keep my end of it if he does. I let him out for twenty hour...twenty three hours and fifty minutes, and then he comes crawling back to me. No tricks, no traps, and you all live. If you attempt to free him, I will kill each of you slowly with his hands. Do you understand me?” 

“Michael, I’ll kill you myself you son of a bitch!” Y/N screamed and lunged for the angel, but Sam held her back. 

“No!” Audrey shouted from the library. All heads turned to her, glowing in her white gown. “Dad made his deal, mom, and we’ll have to live with that. If I can only get one day, I’ll take it.” 

“Baby…” Y/N started.

“No, mom. It’s okay. Michael, please leave now. You’ll get him back in one piece, you have my word. Just let me have my dad, okay?” Audrey approached the angel, eyeing him carefully.  

“Your father is right, Audrey. You are a most beautiful bride,” he uttered, then his eyes flashed blue once more. “Daddy?”

“Honey Bee?” Dean staggered toward her, her arms wrapping tight as he fell into them. “I said I’d be here didn’t I?”

“You never break your promises, Daddy,” she cried, her head buried into the crook of his neck while they held each other. 

“Bee, it’s your wedding day, archangels couldn’t keep me away,” Dean chuckled through his poor attempt at humor. “Hang on my love, time’s running out. We’ll cherish the day, that’s what your life is about now. Hang on to him, Bee. Don’t ever let go.” 

“I won’t, Daddy. You taught me how to love and how to fight and I will,” Audrey vowed. 

“A brand new world awaits you, but you waited for me,” Dean marveled. “Thank you, Honey Bee. Now let’s go get you hitched.” 

Michael sat back and watched the ceremony, bored and disgusted with all the love choking his meatsuit. He kicked back and closed his eyes, waiting for Dean’s time to expire. He drifted back to simpler times, when the other world was his. 

A soft buzzing stirred inside his mind, rousing him from his slumber. Dazed by the sound, he inspected his surroundings. He found himself trapped in a warded steel box, and surrounded by millions of honey bees.

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The Whole Enchilada: @iwantthedean​ @dolphincliffs​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @meganwinchester1999​ @cherrycokegirls1​ @closetspngirl​  @roxyspearing​ @flamencodiva​ @blacktithe7​ @sis-tafics​ @just-another-busyfangirl​ @evansrogerskitten​ @amanda-teaches​ @hannahindie​ @wotinspntarnation​ @winchesterprincessbride​ @winecatsandpizza​ @kickingitwithkirk​  @wi-deangirl77​ @hobby27​ @mogaruke​ @gh0stgurl​ @paintrider13-blog​ @hunterscabin @alleiradayne​ @idreamofplaid​ @seenashwrite​ @crashdevlin​

The Dean’s List: @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @maddiepants​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​ @adoptdontshoppets​ @mtngirlforever​ @supernatural-jackles​​

[winchestergirl-13]

Something To Say

@mrswhozeewhatsis Louden Swain Book

Prompt: “Something To Say”

Pairing: Chuck x Reader

Warning: a lot of angst and then fluff. I can’t seem to not write angst without ending it with fluff.

Word Count: 2456

A/N, Summary: So this one was a bit of a doozy trying to find the write things to say and character. Chuck kept popping back into my mind so I wrote it for him. I kept thinking about what would have happened had there been someone he cared for, but he lied to her from the beginning and then it all went downhill. That’s where this came from. Hope you all like it.

*

Chuck Shurley was a man of many talents, He was God after all. He could write, sing, play guitar, cook, and make a convincing Prophet of the Lord. But his biggest talent was one he'd rather not have-breaking hearts. Becky was, well, she got over it pretty fast. But when he went into hiding, his other girl/boyfriends, they all took it differently. Most he actually made them forget about him because it was easier that way. But there was one person who no matter what he did, no matter the lies, she still held a place in his heart, and it hurt him the most to break up with her. (Y/N) (L/N), best friend and honorary sister to Sam and Dean, and the one he loved most.

Dancing with fate

he's late when they ring the bell

Bow tie won't lie

he's gonna have to do it himself

One of his favorite memories with her was their first date. Back when she didn't know him as God, but rather Chuck Shurley, fiction writer. It was fate (really it was him) when they crossed paths and started going out. But this was an official date and he was nervous. As he was finishing getting ready, his doorbell rang.

“One second!” he called out, trying and failing to tie his bow tie. He has to get it right himself, but it looks like he might just forget about it. Chuck made his way to the door and when he opened it, there stood (Y/N) in a lovely (fav. Color) sundress. Her hair was pulled to one side in a braid and she looked beautiful. While he looked like a mess as his shirt was wrinkled a little trying to get his tie to cooperate.

“H-Hi (Y/N). Sorry, I was having trouble with the tie,” he stated sheepishly, a small blush working its way onto his cheeks.

She just giggled and took a hold of his tie. “Here, let me help you.” And in no time, she had fixed his tie and it looked perfect. “There you go.”

Still blushing, he rubbed the back of his neck and replied with a soft, “Thanks.” After locking his door, the two of them made their way to the fairgrounds for a picnic date. The first of many wonderful dates before she found out his secret.

He's not one to listen

Truth is his religion

Opens the door,

foot on the floor

And he's got something to say

As Chuck reminisced about past memories, he couldn't help but think, would things have been different had he just listened? (y/N) wasn't one to get preachy, but when she had something to say, there was no stopping her. But he never truly listened to her. When he finally told her the truth, they had argued for what seemed like hours about truth and lying. How she never lied to him (even if she had, he'd know) and how could he think to keep this from her and so on and so forth.

It got to the point where she literally packed up her things and was about to make her way out the door. She had her foot out the door when he called out to her.

“I never wanted to hurt you. You were and always will be the one person I loved the most. I know that if you leave now, you won't come back, and I won't stop you. Just know that I truly do care about you and I am so sorry for having kept this from you. I don't ask that you forgive me, I just ask that one day, you'll understand why I did.”

(Y/N) stopped, turned around, and sat her bags down. Making her way over to Chuck, she gave him one last hug and left without another word. He wouldn't see her again for a few years (he did check on her once in a while, but never made himself known to her) and when they did reconnect, the feelings of love were still there, but so was the pain and sadness. Don't' ask her why the sky is bluer in Bell Air

Castle afloat,

the moat ensures you won't get her there

People stare

The whole issue with Amara was taking up most of (Y/N)'s time, so she wasn't focused on Chuck. And then there was the whole “Lucifer possessing Castiel's vessel and having a heart-to-heart with Chuck that didn't end so well” topic that she tried to avoid the outcome of. But when it didn't work for God and His own son, why did her “brothers” think it would work for her and him?

“You're joking right? If it didn't work for Chuck and Lucifer, why do you think it'll work for me?” she asked, in complete disbelief.

Sam sighed. Honestly, he didn't know why Dean even suggested it. It was like asking them why the sky is bluer in Bel Air or something. Honestly, he couldn't bear to see the two of them dancing around each other anymore. It's obvious there's still some feelings for one another, but the guilt and anger are still present. “If I'm being honest, I don't know. But Dean and I can see that the two of you still harbor feelings for each other and it might be good to just talk it out, or yell, or whatever needs to be done. Because watching you two stare at each other and look away is getting harder to watch. It's obvious he still loves you, (Y/N). And I know you do, too.”

Sam walked away after that and left her to her thoughts. He's not wrong and that makes it harder to deny. With a sigh, (Y/N) made her way over to the backroom that Chuck stayed in thinking about his talk with Lucifer. The sound of the door closing caught his attention and for a second, he thought it was Lucifer. But when he saw it was (Y/N), his heart ached at the memories of the pain he caused her, but covered it up with a small smile and a soft, “Hey.”

She's trapped by an indifference

The trees are interference

Fear taking hold

You got to be bold

They sat there for a few minutes in silence, neither one quite sure where to start before Chuck stated, “How about we move this somewhere a little more private?”

(Y/N) didn't even want to know if the others were actually listening in or not, but nodded her head. With a snap of his fingers, they were transported to the surrounding woods outside the Bunker. But now, outside with him, she couldn't quite figure out how she truly felt anymore. It was like there was this indifference trapped around her that wouldn't let her make a decision. With nothing but the trees acting as an interference (which would never work anyways) and Chuck standing barely three feet away, fear began creeping in. Not of him, but of what's going to happen once this was over. “I have to be bold. I have to be strong,” she whispered in her mind. Now or never.

If you've got something to say

Everyone has the day

She got something to say

Everyone has their day

“Chuck, if you've got something to say to me, now's your chance because I've got something to say to you, too. I'm tired of waiting, wondering if you were ever going to come back, to try and fix things between us. I tried to see things from your perspective, but I just couldn't. I was straight with you from the start. I told you I was a hunter, that I killed monsters for a living. And yet, you still went out with me. But you never told me the real truth. That's what really hurt, Chuck. I didn't care that you were a prophet, I didn't even care when you told me you were God Himself, I still loved you. But knowing that you lied to me for a whole year, that's what hurt. And yet when I left, I couldn't get you out of my head. No matter what I've done, you were still there. Even now, I hate you at the moment, but for some damn reason, I still love you.” (Y/N) stared him down, waiting for a sign. What she didn't know was that Chuck was fighting to find the words to say. For once, he was at a loss of words.

You can't bring me down

Bring me down, oh

Taking a deep breath, Chuck closed the distance between them and took a hold of one of her hands. He looked her in the eyes and said, “I know saying “sorry” won't fix this, but I want you to know that I am truly, deeply, sorry for what I did to you. You're right, you never lied to me and yet I did. I never meant to. I just didn't want to loose you if you found out the truth and in the end, I did loose you. But not for who I am, but for what I did to you. And I can't ever take that back. If I could go back and change things, I would, but that would mess up everything in motion. Believe me, there's nothing I wish for more than to be able to redo that whole year. When you left, I tried to get over the heartache, but even then, I couldn't let you go. Everything I did, everywhere I went, I was thinking of you. I never stopped loving you. I don't think I ever will. I don't know if I could ever truly make up for what I did, but I want you to know that I am willing to try again and make things right, but only if you are. I won't force you to try things again with me; I want you to make that decision. I only want to make you happy.”

Oh, you got something to say Put it on the edge of the stage Everyone has today You got something to say Put it on the edge of the stage Everyone has the day You got something to say Put it on the edge of the stage Everyone has the day

(Y/N) thought about what he said and weighed her options. If they tried things again, it could either work out or they'd end up back here again, broken up, yet still loving each other. Or they could go their separate ways, not try again, and maybe have a shot with someone else. But she'd still be thinking of him. No matter what choice she made, her heart will always be drawn back to Chuck.

After much consideration, (Y/N) was going to lay it all on the line. She was going to put her heart out on the edge and say what was on her mind. This was the day, the day they finally make things right. Do you got something to say? Put it on the edge of the stage Everyone has the day

Everyone has today, their day You got the day

She looked him in the eyes and without warning, pulled Chuck closer and proceeded to kiss him, letting every emotion she'd been feeling pour out into the kiss. Chuck was shocked at first, but soon melted into the kiss and before long, the two of them were making out in the middle of the woods.

When air became necessary, they pulled apart, panting and endorphins rushing, but rested their foreheads together. They stayed like that for who knows how long, just catching their breath and trying to comprehend what just happened. “So...” (Y/N) started off.

“So...?” Chuck copied, causing them both to laugh a little. “So does this mean we're trying again?”

“Yes, it does. We'll take things slowly. And no more secrets between us, okay? I don't want to have a repeat of what happened last time,” (Y/N) said, pulling away to look him in the eyes.

“This time I promise you, no more secrets. If I can't tell you right away, I'll let you know, but I don't want to keep anything from you again,” Chuck promised and he meant it.

“Same here. I won't keep anything from you again. The only exception is if it is to protect each other from something, but that has to be known up front, not later. Understand?” she asked.

“Understand,” he smiled and placed another kiss to her lips. Afterwards, he told her about what happened with Metatron in the pocket-dimension bar, what he plans to do, what he hopes can be fixed instead, and that he hopes that when this is all over, not only are him and his sister back together, but that they can have a go at recreating their first date.

(Y/N) would be lying if she said she didn't cry at some of his confessions. And for His sake, he better not die on her. She wants another go at their first date as well. They spent a little more time outside before heading back in. Sam, Dean, and Castiel/Lucifer all noticed the change immediately and they didn't even ask what had happened. Some things were better left unasked. Chuck and Lucifer tried one more time to reconnect and it sort of worked. They were going to need a lot of time to fix their issues, time they didn't have right now, but if things work out with Amara, then they'd have all the time in the world to make things right. Do you have your way? Your way, your way Gonna get your way You got something to say What have you got to say? You got something to say

Chuck Shurley may be a man of many talents, including somehow managing to not only reconnect with his sister and his son, both of whom he locked away, and his girlfriend who miraculously took him back after all the lies, but he also managed to help save His world, His Creations, and start to rebuild His family again. The only thing he wasn't talented in and probably never will be, Godly powers or not, is fixing his bow tie. (Y/N) chuckled and fixed it once again for him.

“What would you do without me?” she asked, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“I don't even want to think of a future without you, love,” he replied, wrapping his arms around her waist. And it was true, without her, he would be nothing. He was very lucky to have her back in his life again. And Chuck Shurley was going to do everything in His power to make sure he never let (Y/N) (L/N) go again.

[mandilion76]

A Dear John Letter (AKA The Little Red Dress)

Title: A Dear John Letter (aka The Little Red Dress)

Pairing: John x Reader

Warnings: None really, just some angst

Word Count: 1025

Summary: After a lengthy absence, John is in no way surprised to find the reader gone

Author’s Note: This is based on the song “Not Giving My Heart Away” by The Station Breaks.  It is for @mrswhozeewhatsis Louden Swain FanFic FanArt Project and Jason Manns FanFic FanArt Project.  The letter is in italics within the story..  Thanks to @wi-deangirl77​ for always being my cheerleader when it comes to my writing!

John eagerly honked the horn as he pulled into Y/N’s driveway, a bouquet of daisies and a bottle of her favorite wine in the passenger seat next to him. He had been gone for over four months this time, much longer than he had wanted to be, but he’d been given no other choice.  It was the life of a hunter, plain and simple. He knew he had a lot of making up to do, especially with how things had ended their last night together.

He remembered it had been raining that night.  Y/N snuggled at his side, a sheet casually draped over their slick, heated bodies.  Sex with Y/N had always been unbelievable, but there was something about that night that really took it to another level.  He held her in his arms, both of them deep in thought.  Seemingly out of the blue, Y/N confessed she had fallen in love with him.  Taken completely off guard, he stuttered some asinine reply.  The look on her face had said it all.  Y/N turned her back to him, the tension in her back palatable.  John spooned her from behind, explaining that he cared deeply for her, he truly did. Y/N responded with a barely audible “I know you do, John.”

To this day, the silence that followed weighed heavily on him. He wished he could take it back, but he really had no choice.  When did a guy like him have any say in having a happily ever after?  John grunted. “Been there, done that, watched it all go up in smoke.”   He ended up on the couch, unable to sleep. Early that morning, he’d gotten a call from a fellow hunter who had a lead on a case in Missouri and needed his help.  He had almost said no, but thought better of it.  Wishing things with Y/N could be different, he left an hour later.  He left a quickly scribbled note letting Y/N know he’d be back as soon as possible and that he would call her when he could.  

John forced down the apprehension brewing deep in his belly.  Usually, Y/N was quick to greet him even before he had a chance to put the truck in park. Looking in the rear view mirror, he noticed the screen door swinging in the breeze. His immediate reaction was to pull out his gun, so honed were his hunting instincts.  He quickly made his way to the back door, gun cocked in front of him. He pushed on the door, sending it crashing against the wall, the thud echoing in the small kitchen. Tense and ill at ease, John took stock of the kitchen.  Usually bright and filled with Y/N’s female touch, it now stood barren and lifeless.  

John slid the gun back inside his jacket.  His gaze gravitated to a pool of red on the kitchen counter. Immediately and without warning, he was back at that bar, the one where he’d first met Y/N.  His fingers slid across the cool silk, a stark contrast to the heat created by the memories of seeing Y/N in the middle of the dance floor, her hips swaying provocatively to the beat of some Wilco song blaring from the jukebox.  Her favorite, she had told him.  

John clenched the silk in his hands, breathing in the scent of Y/N’s perfume still lingering on the fabric. John regretted all the times he’d left Y/N without much of an explanation.  But how could he tell her what it was that kept him away for days, sometimes weeks at a time? It was mostly to protect her, but to be honest, it was also to protect himself.  He was hell bent on destroying Yellow Eyes.  Not only that, but he knew he couldn’t afford to give his heart away a second time, not when there was so much to lose.  He had to resign himself to the life he lived.  There was no room for love, not really John reasoned He glanced down at a slip of paper that had been partially hidden under the dress.

Still holding the dress in one hand, he brought the note to the table.  John rubbed his face, took a deep breath and began reading, Y/N’s distinct handwriting bold and red.

Dear John,

By the time you read this, I will be gone.   There is something (or is it someone?) that stands in the way of you loving me.  You’ve kept your heart from me, John, and that’s what hurts the most.  In the beginning, a night here, a night there was enough; I wasn’t ready for anything more myself.  Yet, one night became two nights, two nights became a week, and before I knew it, I was head over heels in love with you. Never once did you tell me you loved me, but I figured I loved you enough for the both of us. I think deep down, I knew you could never love me, not in the way I needed, but I took a chance anyway. I figured that if I gave enough of myself in body and in soul, you would eventually open up to me and let me in.   I was wrong. Whatever it is that stands between us has a tight hold on you and I’ll never be enough, will I? I want to hate you John, but I can’t. A part of me will always be with you. I wish you nothing but the best.  Love always, Y/N

John knew he deserved this, that he hadn’t left Y/N a choice, but damn if it didn’t hurt. He held onto the note, willing the words away if he stared at them long enough.  Crimson faded to pink, a sudden onset of tears staining the now crumpled sheet.  Deciding there wasn’t any reason to stay, John shoved the note in his pocket.  Debating what to do with the dress, he let it slide through his fingers, watching it pool on the floor like a puddle of blood.  John thought it was somehow poetic.  He closed the door behind him, ending yet another chapter in the life of a hunter.

[takemymora]

Pride MONTH MERCH BABYYYYY. And yes, I am Chuck's PR Department but I wanted to make wholesome memes that people out of the fandom won't be offended by, I hope you guys like it!

[writingfromkitchenator]

I Promise

Drawn/Written for the 2019 Louden Swain Fanfic/Fanart Project run by the amazing @mrswhozeewhatsis!  (Check’m out.  Seriously.)

Characters: Gabriel x OFC, Castiel x OFC, Dean, Sam, Adam, Bobby, Lucifer, Michael

Words: 2,577

Warnings: Character death, angst, depression, some fighting

Based on the song Worlds Collide by Louden Swain

This is the first time I’ve done art for a fic and realistically, the first art peace I’ve done in a long time.  Hope you all like it, it was a blast to build in photoshop.

As always, feedback is highly welcome!

This wasn’t her world.

It all felt different, strange, like she belonged here but didn’t. The air tasting faint, but nature still calling to her as it always did, but this was more out of curiosity now than familiarity.

She blinked, staring at the sun through the leaves, looking at the paleness of her hands, feeling a little exposed.

How did she get here? Had someone saved her?  She knew her world was crumbling, but she had been trying to put it back together, thought it had been working, she was starting to restore what had once been.

“Hey there little lady.”

Making you stay these glory days

Why do they have to end?

She blinks and looks around to the golden eyed man standing before her, his eyes twinkling with mischief and curiosity as he gave her a quick sweeping look.

“What are you doing in a place like this?”

“I wish I knew that myself.” She said softly.  “It seems that I’ve gotten a little lost and stumbled upon an angel.”

He grins widely.  “Ah, so we are gifted too, doesn’t that make things interesting?  The name’s Gabriel.”

She nods, but doesn’t return hers.  “Where are we exactly?”

“In a bit of pickle actually,” Gabriel said, probably a little too sincerely, but he holds out his hand.  “Can I help you get away from here?”

With you my friend, making your way

The older I get harder I fit

A smile reaches her and she nods, taking his hand.  “I’d like that Gabriel, thank you.”

It was the start of something between the two of them, hardly knowing each other but feeling more connected to someone than they had in years.  It didn’t take him long to convince her to stay and it didn’t take her long to get herself acquainted with this world.

Keeping it, saving face

Keeping pace

Making the grade

She started to love this world more than what she had her own, it felt more pure, less corrupted, and Gabriel certainly helped those feelings.  Day by day she felt herself falling deeper and deeper into love with him but unsure how to express it, having never encountered it before, too used to being alone, only having nature around her.

Gabriel protected her, kept her safe and made her laugh at every chance her got.

It's funny how worlds collide

It was strange, she expected regret the first time she really thought back and remembered that she didn’t truly belong here, but was only ever overcome with a sense of peace, that she could look back and reflect without worry.

Taking it all in stride

Gabriel didn’t want to admit that this was what he’d always wanted, some days drawing himself away from it, both to protect her and to give himself time to think.  He knew she thought this world was mostly at peace, that there wasn’t any real danger, and he knew that he was partly to blame for this.

He also knew that she was not stupid.  She would figure things out eventually.

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

He had a bad feeling, so he did the only thing he could think of.

He introduced her to the Winchester’s.

They weren’t happy, keeping someone with her talents in the dark, especially now, but they were quick to understand why, they knew the look in Gabriel’s eye when he talked about her. The way he moved closer to her when they talked about the fight to come, his arm wrapping around her when she talked about helping.

He knew what she had come from, she had told him of what her world had been, and he didn’t want anything like that for her again.  He didn’t want her to be alone.

On the quiet, he asked Castiel to watch out for her.  He knew what was coming, ultimately they all did, and he wanted to make sure that she would be okay.

 “Why do you have to go?” She asked him one morning, wiping her dirt covered hands on her favourite floral dress, looking at him curiously from the middle of her garden, her favourite spot.

Gabriel gives a small smile. “Someone has to go save these losers, right?  I can’t let them have all the fun.”

She frowns at him slightly, feeling worried.  “I don’t want you to get hurt Gabriel.”

He chuckles lightly and comes over to her, pressing a kiss to her forehead.  “I’ll be fine sugar, just…if you don’t hear anything, call Castiel, okay?”

“But-”

Gabriel kisses her deeply for a long moment, hoping it wouldn’t be the last time he could hold her in his arms.

“I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

She watched him go, an ache in her chest, the flowers reaching up for her, curling around her gently and she sighs deeply.

From that first day, deep in the lake

Why did it have to end?

Castiel went looking for her.  He’d expected to hear from her but after two weeks, it had been nothing but silence, leaving the three of them worried, hoping that no one had found out about her.

She hadn’t moved from her garden, her hair wet from the recent rains as she stared at the damp earth, the garden dead, petals floating in the air around her, the only sign of life left.

He kneels in front of her, her eyes red and unfocused and he sighs, feeling her pain.

Carefully, Castiel picks her up and carries her inside her home, the petals finally drifting away in the wind.

With you my friend, floating away

The highest of highs, we'd improvise

“Castiel?”  She asked quietly after some time in silence, wrapped in blankets in front of a fire, her eyes coming up to meet his.

“I’m here.” Castiel moves closer, passing her a glass of water which she takes and slowly drink.  “It’s going to be okay.”

She nods and blinks slowly. “I…I want to help.  Next time.  I want to be there when you face him.

Castiel had nothing to say to that.

High fives and fights like this

On nights like this I long for that day

She was there when it all came to a head and no one got in her way after Castiel got Michael out of the way.  Even though it was now Sam standing there, they had already had this discussion, and she could see past the physical being standing before her.

The flowers on her dress sprung to life, curling around her around her arms and legs, roots bursting through the ground around them all, Castiel, Dean and Bobby all moving quickly away.

Her eyes burned with fury as the ground shook beneath them and Lucifer could do nothing as the vines and roots took hold of him.

It quickly became clear that she was stronger.

It's funny how worlds collide

Michael reappeared, going for her, but he too was quickly bound up.

No one could really believe that she had two archangels now at her mercy.

Taking it all in stride

“I’ve watched one world fall already,” She snarled.  “I’ve had another broken because of your selfishness, I will not sit by and watch you two fools make a further mess of things!”

With a clench of her hands, the vines wrapped around the two throats, cutting off any response that either angel had.  It started cutting into their skin, glowing underneath.

“You’re going to kill them.” Dean said, stepping forward, eyeing her carefully.

“No.”  She snapped, her eyes locked onto the two.  “If they want to survive this, then they will have to leave their vessels lest I wipe all memory of them from the Earth!”

This seemed enough for Michael, ejecting himself from Adam, only to suddenly find himself trapped in the above, Adam passing out quickly.

“I didn’t say you could go anywhere.”  She said coldly, walking forward as the ball of light struggled in the air, her gaze now locked on Lucifer, his red eyes burning as he remained still within her trap. “You two are going to work this out where you can’t hurt anyone.”

Lucifer’s lips curled in a defiant snarl, even as the cuts to his skin started to grow wider.

Dean was now being held back by Bobby.  “You’re going to kill him!”

“Don’t think I can’t force you out of Sam,” She said quietly, standing over Lucifer, her eyes cold. “Gabriel didn’t want to keep me out to protect me, he was trying to protect you.”

Somehow, Lucifer managed to talk.  “This…isn’t…over…”

With that, he left Sam’s body, trapped in the air like Michael.  There was a click and a vine throws something the ground, the two angels being thrown in, what sounded like shrieks cutting through the air, and as the portal closes, all the vines and roots suddenly vanish, petals filling the air, an unearthly silence filling the space as Sam and Adam slowly look up.

Castiel hurries forward and catches her as she collapses.

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

Things took time to settle after that, after all, there were a lot of angry beings that the apocalypse had been stopped.  The Winchester’s and Castiel parted ways for a while, Sam and Dean wanted to sort out things with Adam, and Castiel had a promise to keep.

He took her somewhere new, away from the rest of the world, surrounded by nature where he hoped that she could grieve and recover.  He knew that she normally didn’t use her power like that, that it was more for growing and lifting life back up than for harming others, and that too was now plaguing her.

Her flowers had turned dull and she was seeming more out of place now than what she had ever felt.

“The pain will pass,” Castiel would always say softly to her, particularly on the very bad days.  “I promise.”

“He promised too,” She would reply.  “But he still hasn’t come back.”

“Stranger things have happened.”

It's funny how worlds collide

Castiel did his best to keep her going, checking in when he could with Sam and Dean.  He’s closest accomplishment after several months was to finally get her to stop growing things with thorns.

They all knew it was would take time.

Taking it all in stride

A part of her felt wrong when she would laugh at something Castiel would do. It was innocent enough, and it helped, but it always reminded her of the laughter she would share with Gabriel, often sending her into a melancholic spiral.

Castiel, in more recent times, had found himself holding her when these happened, gently rocking her, trying to do his best to help her through the worst of the pain that the conflicting emotions would bring.

“The pain will pass. I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

After just over a year, Castiel happily reported colour returning to some of her flowers.  The boys didn’t understand, but they believed him about the progress, especially when she found Castiel on the phone, joining their conversation and checking in with how they were going.

It's funny how worlds collide

A routine was starting to develop between the two of them, they moved with ease around each other in the house with ease.  She would teach him about the simple things of life, of being human.  He would teach her about the stars above and what Heaven was really like.

Taking it all in stride

Sam, Dean, Bobby and Adam visited, stunned to see the two of them living so easily together.

“You know, I don’t think I ever though that Cas would pass as a human,” Dean said, grinning.  “But looks like you’ve trained him pretty well.”

She smiles, even as Castiel flushes slightly.  “It just takes time Dean, it’s not like it’s impossible to do.”

Dean shrugs.  “Well, it’s good to see you doing better at least.”

Her smile falters slightly, but she shakes her head.  “I’m getting there.  That’s all I can ask for.”

She stays in the room for a little while, but it was hard to miss the slight distant look in her eyes still, eventually excusing herself and heading out into the garden.

“Is she really doing okay Cas?”  Sam asked. “She…still looks pretty beat.”

Castiel sighs heavily. “I don’t think she’ll ever be truly there, what her and Gabriel had…it can’t be replaced, nor would I hope to, but I can be there in the darker moments, help her through those.”

“You’re in love with her.”

They all looked at Bobby, Sam and Dean go to deny it, but Castiel quickly averts his eyes to the floor.

“Dude…” Dean’s voice was quiet as he stares at Castiel.  “Seriously?”

Castiel sighs and stands, moving to the window, where he can see her in the garden, working away.  “It happened before I even understood it and…we’ve had this discussion.  She feels the draw as I do, but we are both under no illusion as to where her heart truly belongs.”

“Cas…she does understand that Gabriel is gone?”  Sam asked. “I mean, there’s no way that he can come back, right?”

He is silent for a long moment.  “I always tell her that stranger things have happened, but the way things look now, two archangels dead and two locked away in the cage without any hints of it changing, and still no sign of God, it doesn’t look like it will.”

“So tell her that man,” Dean said.  “Tell her that and move her on.”

“It’s not that simple Dean.”

“Of course it is!”

Castiel shakes his head and goes to answer but is cut off.

“It would break her, wouldn’t it?”

He looks at Adam sadly and nods.  “She used to talk about finding a way to go back home but…there’s nothing left there for her, her world died long ago and she was the only thing keeping a small piece of it together.  If I took away that hope, she’d go there and she’d die.”

A silence falls amongst them, all silently agreeing that they don’t want that to happen, but not really sure that this is the best course of action either.

Bobby breaks the silence. “Well, for now, until we can think of something, you keep doing what you’re doing Cas, it’s keeping her happy, for the most part, I think that’s the best we can hope for at the moment.”

Castiel nods.  “I’m trying.”

“Good,” Bobby nods and stands.  “Make sure you keep us informed of any changes, I’d hate to think of something going wrong, which it sadly tends to do.  Come on you lot, we’ve stayed our welcome today.”

She waved goodbye to them, not coming free from her garden.  Dean clasps Castiel on the shoulder before moving to the car and he waits for them to disappear amongst the trees.

Castiel had barely stepped into her garden when she was there, falling into his arms as sobs leaves her.

“I’m sorry,” She sobs, clutching at him.  “I’m so sorry Castiel.”

He holds her close.  “Hush now, it’s okay, you did well today.” She continues to cry and Castiel plants a gently kiss into her hair.  “Come on, let’s get you inside and warm.”

“It hurts so much.”

“I know it does.”  He rests his head atop hers.  “But it’s going to be okay, I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied with this divide…

[rennerator]

LOVE LOVE LOVE AWWWWWWWWWWWW, SOOO SOOOO BEAUTIFUL!!!!! S2 I LOVE ALL THE DETAILS, THE DEDICATION, THE LOVE!!!!! You SHOULD be PROUD INDEED!!!!! This is SOOOO GORGEOUS!!!! SOOO LOVELY!!!! I LOVE THIS SO SOOO MUCH!!!!! :D I LOVE THEIR LIITTLE TEXT MESSAGES THERE!!!! XD I REALLY LOVE Jeremy and Vipin's friendship!!!! AWWWWWW Thank YOU!!!! Thank YOU SOOOO MUCH for ALL OF THIS!!!!! You are AMAZING!!!!! :) <3

Bridgewater fanart again! (Jeremy Bradshaw in his office)

This is my biggest biggest fanart I’ve ever done so far and let me just say that I’m super proud of it!! There are a lot of details once again 👀 (kudos if you can see the references!)

This is a fanart totally dedicated to @thelaurenshippen , thank you so much for your support on my fanarts, it truly means the world to me, and it isn’t much but it is my way to thank you, as you said that you had a new headcanon as you reblogged my Jeremy sleeping fanart “also: new headcanon I now have vipin started TAing for Jeremy when he was still in undergrad so Jeremy also has one photo of the two of them at Vipin's graduation in his office” so I had to do this: Jeremy’s office where there is a picture of the two at Vipin’s graduation!

Once again as the details are detailing and the headcanon is headcanoning, I’m putting some further explanation after the read more! (And also I’ll tell the refs if you don’t want to search for too long 😭)

It took me 19 hours (I’m slow don’t judge me too much and this is not counting the frame on Jeremy’s desk 😭) so let me just say that a LOT of thoughts went through that little (big?) piece.

First of all as you saw, there is Vipin’s graduation pic on Jeremy’s desk, so here’s a further explanation of it under the post of the art itself (in case you want to see it in a bigger way too)

Then, for the phone’s screen, I did a fake conversation between Vipin and Jeremy which I think totally happened at some point. And here is the real screenshot of it because I don’t think you can see well what is written on the fanart unfortunately. (I also put a little reference to the album “Feelings and Such” by Louden Swain in it which is what Jeremy is supposed to listen to, I gotta say the main reason is because it’s my fave album and group but I would totally see Jeremy listening to that kind of music from time to time, I see him listening to “There’s the Rub” from that album)

Then comes his computer: it is truly the logo of the Bridgewater State University, the sticker from the real merch of the Bridgewater podcast, and the ace flag (because Jeremy Bradshaw being on the ace spec soothes my soul)! It’s my headcanon about Jeremy’s computer, it’s the third time I’ve drawn his pc, and the stickers stay the same no matter what and it’ll stay this way jsksksk

There is little basket of stim toys on his desk too and that’s totally my headcanon: I see Jeremy as a really caring professor, and to me he would have it in his office for the stressed out students coming to see him so they can feel better, or at least his students know he has some to lend! (And I’m nd, I would love to have a professor like that 😭) (thanks for a moot on Twitter for the slinky idea!!)

For the sticky notes on the desk: the one on the papers states “read before 03/24” which is the date the last episode of S2 aired, the pink one “proofread Lauren’s thesis defense date 08/06” Lauren is a direct nod to Lauren Shippen, and the date corresponds to the first airing date of the two first eps of S1 of Bridgewater.

The sticky note it “printer password BSU1976JyBw PS: Vipin I do have a limited amount of copies!” because I thought that printers in the uni might have password deferring from each profs (at least it was like this in my French highschool — as a reminder, I’m from France so it’s really me trying to find stuff on the internet), so BSU = Bridgewater State University, 1976 being Jeremy’s birth year (at least I tried to calculate it and it was 1976? Hopefully I’m right 😭✋ as the show aired in 2021 I tried to assume that 2021 was also the date in the podcast and as Jeremy is 45 during S1 welp), and JyBw is just the first and last letter of his first and last name. Comes my headcanon: at some point Jeremy couldn’t print anything because Vipin had printed too many stuff, hence the little reminder because Jeremy doesn’t want to beg to have more copies 😭

The research paper Jeremy has to read before 03/24 has been written by a certain “J.Novak”! (Totally a Supernatural reference) And when it comes to SPN refs, it’s much more subtle, but I did the same soles for Jeremy’s shoes as Castiel in the episode The End of spn (because the shoes are quite famous for being also identical to the one Dean wears so it was funny and on a funfact Jeremy’s legs and feet posture is bc I saw Misha sit like this so I thought it was fun (I also sit like that so it made me happy))

Behind Jeremy there’s an undone Rubik’s Cube, because I totally see it as Jeremy’s very own stim toy but the catch is that he doesn’t know how to solve it 😭 (thanks another moot for the idea @stillwinchester ily!!).

There’s also a mug, because our man needs to stay concentrated (tea? coffee? Your thoughts, to me Jeremy is more of a tea guy), this is a reference to the X-Files! Big Blue is txf’s Nessie, and the mug is a literal copy of the “real” merch mug you can see in “Quagmire” (3x22 of the X-Files)

For the posters on the walls, the one behind the bookshelves was the main art of an exhibition which occurred “Supernatural America: The Paranormal in American Art” and I’m persuaded that Jeremy would have gone to see that! And he would have loved to keep something from it! (But he ended up having to put his shelf in front of it because he had to put his books somewhere and maybe it creeped out his colleagues and students, here’s a picture of the original painting)

Agatha Wojciechowsky (American, born Germany, 1896–1986), and Spirits. Untitled, 1963. Watercolor and crayon on paper. 11 3/4 × 8 7/8 in. Courtesy the collection of Steven Day, New York, NY. Photo: Steven Day

And for the one near his desk, it is an old poster from the American Folk Art Museum, and to me Jeremy would totally be a museum guy, it’s very “academic” after all, plus he would be interested into it as it’s more around people and self taught people and so on, as he is very interested into anthropology, it goes well with the whole vibe.

https://pirtledesign.com/portfolio/american-folk-art-museum/

For the blackboard, the titles are basically what he is teaching in his lecture in S1 EP01 so to me it would be his way to see more what he has to work on for his students (and I think he fidgets his chalks in his lecture because in the same ep as he speaks you can truly hear a lot of chalk sounds which weren’t due to him writing so I understood it that way?), and there’s a little magnet with a “buy cat food!” because headcanon to me but Jeremy owns a cat (a black cat you can see him on his lockscreen on my drawing of Jeremy sleeping) but as he spends a lot of the time at the BSU, I think he would put reminders just in case 😭 (and there’s a little flower drawing made by Vipin! to me he would doodle little stuff from time to time with little smileys to brighten up Jeremy’s day a little)

Then in the bookshelves you can see a little purple owl! It’s to me, an amethyst carved one, as Jeremy had had his esoteric era when he was younger (it was said in S2 that he tried to be Wiccan) he must still have some stone knowledge and as amethyst is supposed to have soothing and good vibes properties, he might have taken this although he doesn’t believe in it anymore, and of course he picked it because it was an owl because it’s better now to laugh about the owl situation 😭

Lastly: all the books are real books! It took me some time but all of these exist, it’s mainly anthropology book, faculty/uni book, research stuff, and there are two books about the Bridgewater triangle! I tried to keep it around Jeremy’s field of course so it’s the occult, witchcraft, the Salem trials, UFOs, beliefs and all!

Thank you so much if you’ve read this far and I’m very grateful for all your support, it truly means the world to me and Bridgewater is very very close and dear to my heart, lots of love to you all! And thanks for bearing with me through my ideas and headcanons 💜🫶

[natasha-cole]

Artworks

Over Before It Began, Angela, Amazing, Taxi Driver, Gamma Ray

[crushing83]

And here is Turnip (representing Mark S).

I am now one step closer to having a poster of the two SNS drummers facing each other (like in that video), with “Turnip the Beet” written on it. \o/ 

[prompt-and-circumstances]

We Were All Medicated

We Were All Medicated

Characters/Pairings: No Pairings! OCs, Reader Insert, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Prompt: Medicated (from A Brand New Hurt by Louden Swain) for the 2018 Louden Swain FanFic FanArt Project (third year!) by @mrswhozeewhatsis

Word Count: 1,997

Warning(s): Angst, Sorrow, Guilt, Death. Look here, this piece hit me in the feels and I’m the joker who wrote it!

A/N: This is a reposting of last year’s challenge piece. It is the sequel to the 2016 Louden Swain Challenge piece “Pop Tart Heart.” All lyrics were used and are not bold or marked in any other way. I didn’t want them standing out like a sore thumb, I wanted this to read smoothly. This can be read in one of two ways: the first way is to go back and read Pop Tart Heart first and then this piece. The second way is to just read this fic as a standalone piece. I do reference the first piece and summarize it in one paragraph within this piece. There will not be a part three, the story ends here.

We Were All Medicated

Holy Chuck. That totally hurt. Of course, that was expected. What wasn’t expected was how relieving the pavement actually was. One would naturally assume that when you get knocked down onto pavement, you a) get the wind knocked clean out of you and b) you get hurt in two directions. Once from the attack and second from the pavement catching your flesh and bones. You braced yourself for more beatings from the group, but they walked away once you hut the ground. Weirdest bullies ever.

You just lay there for a few minutes, okay, maybe more than a few. The pavement seemed to caress the treads of your distress; it was as if the coolness from the concrete was seeping into your very being and washing away the stress, and pain, and guilt. Oh, how you wanted to lay there for eternity! But as Tommy always said, “you gotta grip onto that cow as your seat and speed the plow.”

To be honest, you didn’t have clue one what in the hell that actually meant, but you always assumed it was his version of the age-old adage “if you fall off the horse, get back on.” Good ‘ole Tommy Bandenberry. He was your best friend your entire life until he died with the rest of the scholastic team in a freak bus accident. One year later, that creep Colin Rottergut raised them and the entire cemetery with voodoo. You, your boyfriend Toby, Tommy’s little sister Chelsea, and your nerdy friend Maddox banded together and defeated the zombie dudes. The town “re-died” because of two strange men, brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester. They apparently did this stuff for a living. They stopped Colin and made the four of you swear to never get into hunting monsters.

And the four of you kept to that promise. At least, you tried. You were seniors in high school when the zombie apocalypse happened. Then you all went off to college and not the same ones. You and Chelsea went to one, Toby to another, and Maddox got into an Ivy League school and none of you were surprised. The guy was a total nerd. You all genuinely gave that promise the college try…but it wasn’t enough.

You still didn’t know what happened to Maddox, it was like he ceased to exist or something except you still remembered him. He disappeared without a trace, it’s honestly the damnedest thing. You certainly hoped it had nothing to do with the actual damned. According to the Winchester brothers, monsters are real so it only makes sense that angels and demons are real too, right?

You got into this series of books in college, Supernatural. Some guy named Chuck Shurley wrote them, and they were scarily accurate. You and Chelsea started saying things like, “I swear to Chuck,” and “Oh my Chuck” instead of God’s name. Neither of you knew if God was real, but this Chuck fellow seemed like a good substitute. He just knew too much. You always wondered if the Winchester brothers knew about him and his novels. Did he even have their permission to write that stuff much less print it?

You and Chelsea even got a book club going on campus for those novels. Everyone thought it was great fiction, but you and Chelsea knew the truth. They were real. A slight breeze washes over you and reminds you, you’re still lying on that pavement. You sit up but continue to sit on the cool pavement. You know, for a sidewalk it was awfully clean. There weren’t any markings, or gum spits, or dog droppings, or anything. Not even chalk from a kid during summer. It was just so, pure.

“Like your words, so gentle in their reflection in my window. I knew you would be the kind of girl I could talk to.” Chelsea was special, she was super girly and followed all the latest cosmetic trends. The girl never had a strand of hair out of place and didn’t know how to not accessorize anything and everything. She was a beauty queen, but she was also kind and bubbly. Everyone always assumes the pretty ones are mean, but she wasn’t. She refused to be placed into that mold. She was Tommy’s little sister after all, so you guys have known each other forever.

You remembered when they moved into your neighborhood, right next door to you. You were both five years old. You were sick with a cold and watched them unpack from the window in the downstairs living room. You were so curious but couldn’t join your parents outside to greet and help. You had to stay inside. That’s when you met her. She must have seen you watching them, and she practically bounced over to your window, breathed on it and started writing on it. The two of you did that for hours while the grown-ups unpacked. You’ve been best friends ever since.

Chelsea and Maddox always had a thing in high school. Maddox always seemed a little strange and sometimes you both wished he was a little less insane. All that nerd mumbo jumbo made your heads spin, but not in that creepy Exorcist way. Maddox was always proclaiming, “I may be crazy, at least I’m medicated!” He was such a dweeb sometimes but he always made you guys laugh. The guy was a true gem. You just can’t believe he’s gone without a trace.

Toby went looking for him a few months back. Your boyfriend was eerily protective of you, ever since the zombie dudes incident. He was hell-bent on making sure you didn’t lose another friend and take the blame for it, especially when it couldn’t possibly be your fault to begin with. You remembered calling Toby and telling him to stop the search. You could feel your gut telling you, this wasn’t normal. Something happened, a Winchester kind of thing, and you guys made a promise. A pact even. You were not to go a-hunting.

You turn your head to the sky; the sun is beginning to fade and the Nebraska sky is showing why it’s Nebraska. You sigh, still not ready to stand up on the pavement. You’re getting too lost in your thoughts and memories. “I was intense, you said. To that I silently took offense while you laughed, but I didn’t think it was funny.” Toby insisted your gut instinct was just fear and he continued searching. Two months ago, there was a report on the news, a young man had been found. Dead. Toby was dead. No one knew how, when, where, or why. He was just found. Police say where he was found is not where he died.

You never even went to the funeral. He should have listened! Tommy, Maddox, Toby, and then your worst fear realized; it was Chelsea’s turn. She invited you to some weird ass event her beauty class was doing, and you agreed to go but never made it. You got swamped at work and then your car stalled. You tried to call and let her know you’d be late and possibly miss the event altogether. She never picked up. You assumed, and justly so as any person would, that she was busy with her event. The next morning you got her voicemail, Hey, it’s Chelsea. It’s filling up in here so I was saving your place. I was scared you’d be replaced and I didn’t want to sit with a stranger. Hope to see you soon!

It was cryptic to say the least. Fear of getting replaced? You never did figure out what she was talking about. Later that afternoon, she was declared missing and three weeks later her body turned up, just like Toby’s. You were the only one left. You couldn’t stop asking yourself if their deaths were your fault. It seemed like the only common denominator in everyone’s deaths was you. So how could you stop yourself from making the same mistake?

You knew you couldn’t go looking for Maddox and you couldn’t try to discover what happened to Toby and Chelsea. You placed a call to Dean’s phone and Sam’s phone as back up, in case Dean didn’t get the call. You left messages on each. You never heard from them either. You felt utterly helpless. And alone.

Whatever was coming for you, you knew it was coming. It had to be. You did attend Chelsea’s funeral. It was awful. The only thing as awkward as goodbye, was standing up in your seat to let her by. You should have been a pall bearer, but you just couldn’t handle it. You didn’t know how you fought the tears back as her casket solemnly made its way past you.

The pavement’s coolness seemed to finally dissipate. It took you way too long to realize that it was backwards. In the hot afternoon sun, it should have been warm and in the evening, it should have been cool. It was cool in the afternoon and cold in the evening. You thought on it, and it seemed as if everything else was normal except for that one thing. The pavement was horribly off, like someone forgot how it worked when they made a world just for you. A world. Just for you.

Sam and Dean were very solemn as they built a funeral pyre. They were preparing yet another hunter’s funeral. This one was different though. They were used to burning their friends and family, that was the hunters’ way after all but this was for a kid. A kid they knew once, a kid they rescued and swore to secrecy. The Winchesters had gotten the kid’s phone messages too late; they arrived too late. The brothers had investigated the deaths of Toby and Chelsea, and while it took a little longer to get done, they did find Maddox.

Maddox was just as dead as the other two were. Sam and Dean tried to keep hope that they could save the last one, but they were just too damn late. Two years ago, they taught these kids about hunting and monsters, but they clearly didn’t teach enough. The Winchesters hoped none of the kids were aware of what happened, that the dreams were real enough so they’d never know the Djinn were feeding off of them.

They burned the carcass of Maddox where they found him, and Toby and Chelsea had been properly buried. They didn’t have the heart to dig them up to burn them; they wanted to leave them undisturbed for the grieving parents. Sam struggled to light the match, his tall frame sagging with sorrow. He remembered how brave this kid was, two years ago leading the assault against a zombified town. He knew he’d never meet this kid again, never speak again.

Dean was blaming himself. “Dean, it wasn’t your fault.” Sam tried to console his older brother.

“I know Sammy, I just can’t help thinking if I had gotten to my phone sooner. Maybe in another life, maybe we could have been…”

“I know, I know.” Sam choked back tears, “maybe we could have saved them, all of them. But we didn’t, we couldn’t. You remember the Djinn, it’s likely these kids died pain free, not knowing what was happening. We can take that with us, knowing they didn’t suffer.”

“Yeah, whatever. Just light the damn thing up, I want to get back on the road.”

Sam just looked at Dean and bit his tongue. Dean was dying inside and standing here watching an innocent kid burn in a funeral pyre, was just too much right now. Sam flicked the lighter on and tossed it onto the mound. Neither brother would ever admit it, but each said a silent prayer to Chuck to watch over these kids in heaven. Sam prayed for Chelsea to be reunited with her brother Tommy, and Dean just prayed that they’d have better heavens than they did final medicated dreams.

[mrswhozeewhatsis]

Looking for artists/artsy folks!

I’ve got several stories for the Louden Swain and Jason Manns projects that need art! If you’re artsy and can work fast (since I have a week to get my shit together) and want to help, let me know!!

2019 Louden Swain FanFic FanArt Project

2019 Jason Manna FanFic FanArt Project

[winchestergirl-13]

When I’m Gone

@mrswhozeewhatsis Louden Swain Book

Prompt: “When I'm Gone”

Pairing: Gabriel x Reader

Warning: little angst, little gore/blood (but very minor/mentioned), some fluff, feels mostly, its gets better in the end.

Word Count: 1,345

A/N, Summary: When I started this story, I kept thinking back to season 13 when we saw Gabriel again and when he left to hunt down Loki. I thought, why not give a different view on that; what if there was someone else he was doing this for? That he left to protect someone he cared about, but didn’t think it all the way through. So that’s where this story came from. I hope you enjoy it.

*

When Gabriel left after killing Asmodeus, his intention was to go after Loki for what he did to him, but he couldn't bring himself to do it yet. He didn't know what to do with himself after leaving her...again. (Y/N) had done nothing but try to help him recover from Asmodeus and not once did she bring up the last time she saw him, which was after killing the other gods and “dying” at Lucifer's hands. And how does he repay her kindness? By leaving. After he flew away, he cleaned himself up with what little grace he had left and made his way out of town. He had to walk but that was fine by him.

Somewhere in a game chest Feeling like a domino Staring at the candle light Waiting for a sign to show I got six more hours 'til the bus comes And then I'm gone She won't know how it really feels Until I'm gone

Gabriel felt like he was stuck in a game chest or waiting for the last domino to fall. He couldn't figure out what he was feeling. The sun was just starting to set over the tree line as he waited for some sign to come his way. Something to tell him what to do. He came to a stop at a bus stop outside of Lawrence, and while he had to wait about six hours until the next bus got there, it gave him time to think. Where the bus was going, he didn't know. Once he got on that bus, he'd be gone; he wouldn't see (Y/N) again. He tried not to think about how him leaving again was going to make her feel. He couldn't stand the thought of hurting her again, yet that's what he was doing. “It's for her own good,” he thought to himself.

But then I really wouldn't know I really wouldn't know

(Y/N) was out of town on a hunt when Asmodeus came by to try and steal Gabriel again, so she wasn't there when he killed his captor, nor when he left. Sam and Dean had to tell her that Gabriel had left and that he wasn't coming back. So many emotions were running through her mind as she tried to figure out what to do now that Gabriel had left. But she really didn't know.

Neither did Gabriel. Neither of them knew what to feel right now. Big wheel pullin' me I don't know why I feel so low Cherry flavored lolly pop Gotta stop looking so Lonely, nobody's gonna wanna make it With a fool I imagine her coming home Coming home to a place so cool

The Greyhound bus pulled up and he got on, trying to understand why it felt so wrong. Taking his seat, he pulled out a cherry lollipop and looked out the window to avoid making conversation with anyone who decided to sit next to him. He didn't want to explain the sad, lonely look to his face right now. Against his better judgement, Gabriel was thinking of (Y/N), of her coming home to someone who could make her happy. To a place where she didn't have to worry about monsters and angels and him. But that just made it worse. Instead, Gabriel tried to focus on those who wronged him; Loki and his children and made it his mission to take care of them.

Yeah but then I really wouldn't know I really wouldn't know I really wouldn't know There'd be no way to know Anyway Anyway

(Y/N) tried to forget about Gabriel, about how he hurt her, but she couldn't. He was all she could think about. Hunts took her mind off of him for a small time, but when it was over, he was there again. She often wondered if he thought of her while he was doing...whatever it was he was doing. But she also didn't want to know. What she didn't know was that Gabriel did think of her while he was on his mission. It gave him a purpose; thinking of her and how she's doing without him made hunting down and killing Loki's children easier. To him, not only was he getting revenge on the person who hurt him, but he was making it safer for her in case they decided to go after people he cared about. But they wouldn't get the chance once he was done with them.

I don't mind the pain I don't mind the flames I don't mind the rage...

Killing Fenrir was fueled by rage, pain, and the determination to get back at Loki. When Fenrir swiped at Gabriel and injured him, he used that pain as a way to push on. He had to get them all, he just had to. But without his grace, he couldn't heal himself fast enough and the injury actually slowed him down. He needed help.

Luckily, with the little grace he had left, he somehow managed to find Sam and Dean at their motel and asked for help. The Winchesters didn't have to help him, not after he left them and (Y/N), but if they didn't and he died before (Y/N) got back to the motel, it would make things worse. So they helped patch him up and found out what he was doing here and why.

“Is (Y/N) still with you two?” he asked out of the blue.

Dean fixed him with a glare and stated, “Why do you care?” Gabriel sighed; he saw that coming. Why did he care? He never stopped caring for her.

“Because she's all I think about, minus the revenge on Loki. I never stopped caring for her. I thought leaving would protect her but it only made things worse.”

She's gonna be lonely, won't she When I'm gone

“She's been so focused on hunting to get over the pain that you caused her. If you thought that leaving would make her stop, you had it wrong. (Y/N) has been going on hunt after hunt in hopes of finding you. She hasn't stopped thinking of you, either,” Sam explained. So she was lonely, but not in the way he hoped.

She's gotta realize just how unwise she has been Since I've gone

“She's been trying to find me? Why?”

“You know, I've asked her that myself and she never said anything more than she had to. That's all. She had to find you,” Dean replied.

Sittin on a bus your thoughts turn to dust And seep into your skin

Gabriel thought back to that night at the bus stop. Had she been looking since then? Did she ever think about stopping? Where was she now? His thoughts were interrupted when Sleipnir and Narfi broke into the motel room and it all went downhill after that. He managed to kill Narfi when he was attacking Sam, causing Sleipnir to run off. As they caught their breath, there was the sound of a gun cocking behind Gabriel's head. He froze as Sam and Dean carefully made their way over.

“Turn around slowly.” Gabriel did just that and by the sharp intake a breath from the person holding the gun, and himself, each were just as shocked as the other.

I gotta turn back I gotta turn back I gotta turn back

Anyway

“Gabriel?” the gun lowered as she stared in confusion. Was it really him?

“(Y/N),” he whispered, not believing it to be her. But it was. A few more scars and bruises then he remembered but it was her. There was a sound of a gun hitting the floor, shaking breathes that were trying not to turn into sobs, and then his arms were suddenly full of the hunter he loved.

“You're here. You're actually here.”

“Yeah I'm here and I'm not going anywhere,” he promised. He hoped he could keep that promise. After the battle with Loki and getting his nephew and Mama Winchester back from the alternate universe, he wanted to go back to her. And he would do anything to make that happen.

[waywardnerd67]

His Reaper

Summary: The time has finally come for Dean Winchester. After all the years of watching him die and come back it was finally his time. Yet, when (Y/N) goes to him she cannot do the one thing she was task to do from the moment the great hunter was born. Characters: Dean Winchester, Reaper!Reader Pairing: Dean x Reader Warnings: Fluff/Slight Angst Word Count: 1695 (with lyrics) Song Lyrics (BOLD): Amazing – Louden Swain A/N #1: This is for @mrswhozeewhatsis Louden Swain FanFic Project A/N #2: As always this is unbeta so all mistakes are mine. Likes, comments and reblogs are splendid and I will love you doubly for them! Enjoy!

The moment Dean Winchester was born into the world, Death brought her to his crib side, “See this little one (Y/N). He’s special and I want you to be the one who reaps him when it’s his time. Only you will know when that time is because you are special to him. Understand?”

At the time, she did not understand why Death would take such an interest in one human. (Y/N) felt she was being punished by own having to reap one soul. Why would Death assign her? Why was he so special? What was she to him? All questions she asked herself the first four years of Dean Winchester’s life. Then she watched as another reaper came to collect his mother’s soul after a demon killed her. Setting him on the path to becoming one of the most skilled and feared hunters of the world.

(Y/N) kept her distance as he grew up watching him go through an abusive childhood with a father who was so consumed by grief he could not even see he was abusing his sons. She watched as they were groomed into fierce warriors and as Dean learned to be on his own as Sam left them for college. When John Winchester disappeared as Dean was on a hunt of his own, she watched as the brothers were reunited and then brought together by the untimely death of Sam’s girlfriend.

Over the next fourteen years, (Y/N) watched as Dean and Sam Winchester fought off every possible evil the world could throw at them. She was there for every death Dean had always sending him back knowing deep down that it was not his time yet. She almost went toe to toe with an archangel who made Sam goes through Dean’s death over a hundred times. It was the only time in all her years of reaping souls that she felt exhausted trying to keep Dean’s soul from going to his afterlife.

Now, she was standing at his hospital bedside. The archangel Michael having left his body a complete wreck after Dean had trapped him within his mind. Michael was not kind when he broke free and now machines were keeping him breathing. Sam was clearly distraught about the impending decision he would have to make while Castiel was looking into any healing spells he could with the Men of Letters Bunker.

“Hello (Y/N).” she heard Dean’s sadden voice behind her.

She looked over to him as he looked down at himself, “Hello Dean.” She said softly as he walked up next to her.

It was not the first time they had met in all the times he had died she allowed him to remember her. (Y/N) did not understand why she would do something so reckless, but she felt connected to Dean in ways no reaper should ever feel for any human. Now, standing with him Death’s comment about her being special to him became perfectly clear.

They were bound together. Forever meant to be by each other’s sides. Why Death had chosen her, she probably would never know, and it honestly did not matter. The only thing that mattered was this moment right now with Dean.

“I know one of these days bad habits will kill me. That sooner or later we all must pay our debts. No one is immune to the maker no matter how sorry, no matter how safe, no matter how lucky you are. The landlord needs the rent.” He said watching as Sam walked into his hospital room his long chestnut hair dirty from not bathing and a week’s worth of hair covering his face.

Sam sat down next to his brother��s bedside, “Dean I don’t know if you can hear me, but I need you to keeping fighting. I… I don’t want to do this life without you. I don’t know if I can save you this time, but if you keep fighting then so will I.”

Tears were running down Sam’s face as he placed his face within his hands. (Y/N) glanced over to Dean whose eyes were shining in pain. “This is it, isn’t it?” she nodded as he took in an unneeded deep breath, “But as I lay in my hospital bed there's not a moment that I regret. Take me to your leader, put me in my place. A little smoke and mirrors and a little bit of faith. I'm the captain of my story, but I'm looking for a mate. A rescue from the needle. Give me just a taste of your amazing grace.”

She was surprised to hear that this time he was ready to go with her. (Y/N) wondered if Death had anything to do with this. She knew Dean had seen her reading room and that after trapping Michael she showed him how all of this was supposed to end. Yet, (Y/N) could not shake the feeling that it was not his time yet. The world still needed Dean Winchester. It still need Dean, Sam, Castiel and Jack all together to protect it.

“I often think of my life as one big movie. A two buck matinee of one of the greats. The main characters is just so captivating. I just worry I'm the only one in the seat, but as the final credits start to fade. I wouldn't take back a single frame. Take me to your leader, put me in my place. A little smoke and mirrors and a little bit of faith. I'm the captain of my story, but I'm looking for a mate. A rescue from the needle. Give me just a taste of your amazing grace.” She saw the agony in his eyes as he spoke.

(Y/N) knew he was worn and tired, but this was Dean giving up, “Dean… I-I can’t.” she whispered as he grasped her shoulders making her face him.

“I need you by my side. I need you this morning wrapped tight in a web of blankets and strawberry sheets. We both know its truth that we'd both we'd be probably working nose holding tight to a laptop like a dog on a leash. Hold me baby, hold me tight. The car is racing, the road is flying by. Take me to your leader, put me in my place. A little smoke and mirrors and a little bit of faith. I'm the captain of my story but I'm looking for a mate. A rescue from the needle. Give me just a taste of your amazing grace.” He was pleading with her as she shook her head.

“I can’t Dean. You need to go back with Sam, Castiel and Jack. They need you, the world needs you. Dean, I need you to go back even though I want nothing more than to take you to your final resting place. You have to go back because you still have work to do.” If she could cry it would have been in that moment.

Dean was looking down still grasping her shoulders tightly. She could see the internal battle going on with his mind as his shoulders tensed up. Finally, he let go of her and looked up at her. His green eyes set with the very determination she had come to admire him for.

“Okay (Y/N). Send me back.” He said as she reached up to touch his forehead, but he stopped her suddenly, “You’ll still be around, right?”

She smiled nodding, “Always.” She placed her hand gently against his forehead feeling his spirit drift back towards his bed.

(Y/N) watched from the far corner of the room as Sam, doctors and nurses were hovering over Dean as he woke up. Over the next few days, she watched as Dean reunited with his family. The world was all the safer when the four of them were together. As Dean was released from the hospital, Death appeared at her side when the familiar black Impala drove off towards the Bunker.

“You made the right decision even though you did not want too.” She said to (Y/N) as she placed her hand on her shoulder.

They appeared in Death’s reading room and (Y/N) looked around confused, “W-What is going on?” she asked.

“When you were assigned to Dean Winchester my predecessor knew you would be special to Dean, but I do not believe he knew just how special. You know what I am tasked with as Death, right?” she asked.

(Y/N) nodded, “Yes ma’am however what does that have to do with Dean Winchester and I being his reaper?”

In a rare moment, (Y/N) watched as Death smiled genuinely and that made her worry. “Your role in Dean Winchester’s life is much more than being his reaper now. You belong at his side and I’m going to make that so. (Y/N), it is important for this world and universe that you are still the one who will know when it is Dean’s time to go. I’m sorry for putting this burden on you but when the time comes, you will be the one who knows when it is time to let him go.”

She stared at Death unknowing how to take in everything she had just said. “Why me?” was all she could manage to ask needing to know after all this time.

“You’re important just as the Winchesters are important to this world.” She answered then snapped her fingers.

(Y/N) slowly opened her eyes seeing bright blue sky and feeling the warmth of the sun above. All the noises, sensations, smells were all overwhelming for her. Her chest was burning and then she took in a deep breath now needing to breath. Her stomach growled angrily at her and her mouth was dry making her throat burn. She squinted to look around and found the familiar entrance of the Bunker.

Shakily making her way over to the door barely strong enough to open it and stumbling down the dark corridor she banged on the solid iron door with all her strength. When it opened she found herself staring into the all too familiar piercing olive eyes. “D-Dean…” she said as blackness flood her eyes.  

Check Out Part 2: Her Hero

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