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toxicanonymity · 1 year ago

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Forever for her. Left in Lincoln, pt. 7 .

10k, softdark!Joel Miller x virgin f!reader

Series Master List | official playlist | floorplan

WARNINGS: I8+, virginity loss, big girthy age gap, angst, dark fluff, reader menstruates, p in v, fingering, grinding, creampie, subtle intimidation, manipulation, horror background elements. Joel is creepy, dark, delulu, and cringe (reader is sheltered, isolated, hormonal). Enthusiastic but dubious consent (brainwashing?), playing fast and loose with climate and fruit. Reader wears a flannel from Joel's closet. Haphazardly edited. This is not the last part.

"We're givin' each other everything, right?" You nodded, then he continued, "So listen." He paused and wet his lips. "I would do anything for ya, peaches." He looked down. "Anything." He met your eyes again and swallowed. "Anything to keep ya safe. . . " He lowered his voice. "an' anything to keep ya mine."

You woke up in Joel's bed, and he was nowhere in sight. You were warm, almost too warm. The dress was hanging on the back of his bedroom door. Your undergarments and a pad were on the nightstand.

You took a bath, then put your robe back on and laid on the bed staring at the dress on the back of the door. You could hear the rhythmic scrape of a rake outside and inwardly smiled, picturing Joel doing yard work. You put on your robe, crossed the room to look out the window and felt a refreshing draft as you held the curtains back. In the bottom right corner of the window's top pane, there was a spiderweb on the outside of the glass. The rake continued to scrape against the ground in the distance. The web was well-defined and irregular, some of the fibers thicker than others. You admired its intricacy and followed the design, looking for the spider, wondering if it was a male or female.

The rhythmic scraping of the rake lulled you into a trance as you followed the web from the outer edge in, until a black, out-of-focus mass fell right in front of your nose, then you felt a tickle on your chest. You gasped and stifled a squeal. Your body jerked into panic mode. You rapidfire slapped yourself on the chest and felt it smush against your robe. You wiped it on the window pane, then looked at the crumbled spider with its legs drawn in on itself, still moving but barely. It looked like a slow death, but you hoped it wasn't painful. Surely it never thought about its prey this way.

You took a deep breath and tried to slow your heart rate. You recalled that time back at your house, outside the spider shed, so long ago – Frank's words through laughter, "we're gonna get through this, honey." You took slow, calming breaths, then swallowed and whispered "sorry," before abruptly turning and walking to the bathroom. You washed your hands and chest with soap again, then came back and sat on the bed. The rake had stopped moving.

You finally stood up and retrieved the dress, bringing it to the bathroom with you and locking yourself in. You didn't want Joel to see you if it didn't look good on you. Plus, you had to do something really private.

First you went to the toilet. It was its own room within the bathroom. You locked it, too. You sat there for about fifteen minutes trying to let as much of your period out as you could after being horizontal all night. You didn't want all the built up blood pooling in your pad right away.

Once you did all you could, you washed up and looked in the mirror. You stood there and looked at yourself in your underwear for a minute, mostly looking at your face. You looked different, serious, but vibrating with a new energy. You imagined Joel standing behind you, as if you were in a portrait. Something you'd never have. But at least you had each other.

You finally put the dress on, over your head. You could just barely reach the back zipper to finish it. It felt much less cumbersome than you imagined it would. It was light and unrestrictive. The lace sleeves had enough room. It felt as comfortable as any other dress. You didn't look in the mirror right away. You looked down at yourself, then looked over your back, and down your arms. You looked in the reflection of the shower glass and the silhouette looked good enough.

You turned around to look in the real mirror, and you looked nice. The lace made you feel like a doll, but somehow you looked older than yourself at the same time. You turned around and admired it from the side and over your shoulder from the back, then smoothed it down over your butt and you didn't see the bulkiness you feared from your pad. You looked at yourself head on again, and the only thing out of place was the redness on your chest from scrubbing away the spider. With the dress on, there was a new smile behind your eyes, thinking about how Joel got it for you.

You went to the kitchen to look out the back window. You didn't see Joel and were somewhat relieved to have another moment to yourself. Your tummy felt nervous. You knew it was excitement, but the physical sensation was in discernable from anxiety. There was a little jar of apple juice on the table with a pill and a note that said "cramps?" You were feeling okay but thought about taking half of it anyway.

You sniffed the juice and it smelled good. You sat at the kitchen table and stared at the apple juice in the jar, then took a long sip and watched the tiniest bit of apple sediment settle back to the bottom. It was delicious. You took half the pill and downed the rest of the juice, then your stomach rumbled. You got an apple from the kitchen counter and sat back down. You inspected it and pressed it. You cut it with your thumbnail to make sure it wasn't rotten. It was crisp, and juice beaded along the crescent moon from your nail. You took a bite and it was fine. You relaxed into the chair and ate the apple.

Joel had let you sleep late. It was almost mid day. Just as you were finishing up your apple, you noticed him outside through the kitchen door window. He was standing there and looking at you like you were the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. He was wearing a white button-up shirt that looked like one Frank might wear to one of his black tie dinners. Joel came inside and as he turned around to close the door, you admired his lower body in a pair of form fitting khakis.

"You look nice," you told him.

He exhaled a small laugh and looked at the floor as he crossed the room to you. He sat down at the table and took your hand. "You look like an angel." He kissed your hand and scooted closer. He smelled like aftershave (although he wasn’t shaved, thank goodness) and a hint of sweat from his yard work. As comfortable as he made you feel, you still got butterflies around him.

He asked, "Hungry?"

You nodded. "A little."

"How bout a lil picnic, somethin' light?"

You nodded "is it nice out?"

"Prettiest day we could want, peaches."

—------

He made some grits and you sat at the table watching. He pulled the wagon with a basket, quilt, and blanket, and held your hand as you slowly walked. He squinted and looked at the trees, then at you.

He asked, "How ya feelin'?"

"Good, I'm fine."

"Good."

You assumed you were going to "your tree," but instead you arrived at a peach tree. He had cleared the area around it so no debris was in the way. He looked around and asked, "Whatcha think?"

You looked around. It was a good spot, away from the back, but not too close to the street. Insulated enough to feel private. You nodded, "yeah, this is nice."

Joel spread out the quilt, then the blanket, then, before sitting down, he took both your hands in his. "I feel so lucky, peaches. You're the most special girl in the world." His eyes bored into yours. "Really mean that. There's no one like you, darlin'."

You looked down then met his eyes again, biting your lip. "I think you're special, too."

A breeze came and swept your dress out, making the scene feel like a postcard.

He dropped your hands, then fetched something out of his pocket and looked at it. Your heart skipped a beat. His thick fingers were blocking your view.

"Now darlin', I'm gonna give ya somethin', but first. . ."

He held it up. It was gold and shiny. Your birth father's wedding band. Your heart skipped a beat and a knot formed in your stomach.

"My. . ." You couldn't finish the sentence. This meant he knew about the gun, too. . . and your mother's knife.

Joel must have seen it on your face. "Left everything else how ya had it. You're a smart girl, peaches."

You tried to read his face. It was soft, sympathetic. You nodded hesitantly.

"It's okay, darlin'. I don't blame ya. I woulda done the same." He held the ring between his forefinger and thumb and you opened your palm. "Smart to be prepared."

You breathed a sigh of relief as the knot in your stomach relaxed. But even as it faded, you still had that nervous–no, excited–tummy.

Joel put the ring in your hand and closed it. He held his hand there around yours and seemed like he might say something else, but he didn't.

You didn't have anywhere to put the ring. You had a passing thought to put it on your thumb but it felt stupid. You felt an urge to say you were going to give it to Joel, but you didn't say anything since he let you off the hook.

Joel reached back in his pocket and fished out another ring, smaller. It was silver with inset stones. He held it up and said, "I want you to have this one." He stepped closer, so his feet were outside yours. "We're givin' each other everything, aren't we?"

You nodded, and his eyes watered.

He nodded with you and his brow furrowed. "I love you. . . And I love bein' a family, the two of us."

Your own eyes felt misty. "I love you, too."

He took your hand, and slid the ring onto it. It was old fashioned, simple. "Ain't never gonna let ya go."

"Good," you whispered.

—

He kissed your hand, and when he tried to hold your other hand, too, you realized you were still holding your father's ring.

"Um," you cleared your throat. "Would this fit you?" You asked and opened your hand. His face relaxed.

"I dunno, peaches," he whispered. His eyes sparkled at you. He held his hand palm-down. The top of his ring finger's knuckle was a little red as if he'd already tried to put it on. You slid the ring part way on, but his finger was too big.

"Sorry," you muttered and felt a lump in your throat. You didn't have anything to give him. It rested above his knuckle.

"S'okay darlin', it's the fact that ya tried." He unbuttoned his shirt pocket, dropped the ring into it, then buttoned it again. "I'll keep it safe for ya."

You sucked your bottom lip into your mouth and nodded, looking up at him shyly, somehow feeling like you ruined this.

He cupped your face and read your eyes, then closed the gap between your faces and his lips pressed into yours.

He hugged you into him, kissed you harder, then murmured, "wanna sit down?"

You nodded.

You smoothed your dress under you and sat down with your knees to the side, leaning toward him. He unpacked a thermos of grits and two bowls. He unbuttoned his wrists and rolled up his sleeves and his forearm flexed with every lift of the spoon. You ate mostly in silence, but he looked at you adoringly the whole time and your nerves faded. His wrist nudged his inner thigh and when your eyes drifted there, the shape of his cock sent a pang between your legs. He followed your gaze and your face heated up as he raised his eyebrows.

—

When you were finished eating, you washed it down with the apple juice, then Joel packed up the basket and put it back in the wagon. When he settled back onto the blanket again, he had a serious look about him.

He sat down with his legs folded to the side so his knees were toward you, and he braced his hand on the blanket, leaning toward you. He kissed you again. He tasted like apples and you imagined he did, too. As he pulled away, he read your face and cupped your cheek. "You're the most beautiful angel, darlin'," he smiled. His gaze lingered, then he swallowed and looked down. He sat up straighter and cleared his throat. He asked again, "We're givin' each other everything, right?"

You nodded, then he continued, "So listen," then wet his lips and paused. "I would do anything for ya, peaches." He looked down. "Anything." He swallowed. "Anything to keep ya safe," he met your eyes and lowered his voice. "And anything to keep you mine."

Your heart raced and you slowly nodded as he let it sink in.

"Get what I'm sayin', peaches?"

"Bad things," you nodded.

His brows remained furrowed as he studied your face. His voice was low and gruff. "Yeah, you could say that."

You looked down to his shirt and the outline of your father's ring in his pocket. He continued, "and darlin', I've felt this way for some time."

Your chest fluttered.

He looked up at the leaves of the peach tree, and it hit you that this was where he found you that day.

Your whole body felt warm, especially in the lace sleeves. He looked at you with anticipation and you admitted, "I had a feeling."

He lifted his eyebrows as he searched your eyes. "Okay," he whispered with a small nod. He looked down again.

"Yeah," you replied. ". . .and maybe you already did bad things." Your chest pounded. He looked at you blankly, and once he blinked, you rephrased, "Necessary things. To be together."

His jaw shifted back and forth. He looked at your mouth, then back up at your eyes. "Would ya wanna know?"

Tension gathered between your eyebrows. You took a deep breath, looked at his lips and watched his jaw clench. His eyes watered. After a moment, you slowly shook your head no. He inhaled and his eyes narrowed. Your voice was a near whisper as you told him, "No. . . Doesn't matter now."

Joel exhaled and nodded. He looked at you intensely and whispered, "Okay, baby."

You didn't need to know. You told him, "We're together, that's all I care about."

"Me too, darlin'." He chuckled, then relaxed and said, “so glad we got each other.” He folded his knees toward you again, leaned in, and cupped your cheek, his eyes locked with yours. “Me and you, baby.”

“You and me,” you whispered, lashes fluttering as his face drifted toward yours.

—-

Your lips locked, and yours tingled with excitement.

His hand moved to the back of your head. His tongue parted your lips, and he pulled you into him as he became more passionate.

As his kiss intensified, he gently lowered you into lying down on the blanket, with one of his knees between yours. His hand ran up your side and came to a rest on your breast as his mouth devoured yours. He palmed your breast, gently bit your lip, and his length hardened against your thigh. When he pulled back, he cupped your face and raised his eyebrows, and his voice was husky. "I'm never," he kissed your lips, then lowered his volume and looked into your eyes, "gonna let you go." His thumb stroked your temple. His lips brushed yours, then kissed you deeper. He pulled back, shook his head with a small smile, and his voice became a whisper as he repeated, "Never."

Your skin prickled with goosebumps, Joel's beautiful face hovering over yours under the peach tree, his body pressed against yours.

"Good," you whispered, and took his head in both your hands. You pulled him down on you. He braced himself with one forearm on the blanket near your head and his other hand traveled back down your side, down your dress, and reached under the skirt of it to your thigh. His hand slid up your thigh and he squeezed it, then lifted your thigh against him.

He lowered his hips to rest against yours, and his cock grew stiffer against you. The warm shape of his stiff length made your whole body go weak. He lifted himself off you just long enough to get the skirt of your dress out of the way. You felt warm and wet between your legs and didn't know how much of it was blood. You knew he didn't care, but it didn't entirely leave your mind.

He had the front of it bunched up at your hips, with his hand between your legs. You flinched as his palm glided over your panties, feeling the shape of your pad. But it didn't phase him at all. He gently reached into your panties.

Your face tensed. “Remember, I–"

"I know, baby," he reassured you with kind eyes.

"What about the dress?”

“Dress don’t matter, darlin’." He kissed you again. "Long as you're feelin' good." He planted another kiss and pressed his hard-on against you again. "Are ya?"

You nodded an unequivocal yes. It was certainly what your body wanted.

"Hell, let's paint it red,” he mused.

You relaxed and laughed softly.

"No?" He asked with a smile, then leaned his forehead against yours. He kissed you gently.

The time of the month wasn't ideal, but you wanted it. If you waited, he might think you weren't ready after all. Plus, you were more comfortable than you ever thought you could be. A month ago, you would have died at the thought of a man seeing any evidence of your period at all. But Joel was so reassuring, so comforting, and he really wanted all of you. He was turning it into something beautiful, and you had no doubt he felt that way. He looked at you again, then asked, “Sure you’re feelin’ good enough?" He kissed you again. “‘Cause that's all that matters.”

“I am,” you nodded earnestly.”

“You sure?”

"Joel," you sighed on the edge of irritation.

"Ok, darlin'."

He slid his hand down and exhaled vocally when his fingers met your warm, moist folds. He ran his fingers up and down your folds, moistening your clit, then he slowly, teasingly circled it. His cock swelled harder against you. "You wanna go to bed?"

You shook your head. "It's magical out here."

"That's right, peaches," he murmured lowly into your neck, lightly circling your clit with his moist fingers. His breath was warm and humid against your neck. "Special, ain't it?"

You nodded, and pulled his head back down to yours. Your lips met again. His thick fingers tensed, slid down, and prodded at your entrance. You tilted your hips and he gave a short, low "mm" as he brought his fingers back to your clit.

His tongue slid against yours in rhythm with his fingers. His mouth grew hungrier for yours every moment as he massaged your most sensitive place. He got you almost to the edge. You whimpered as his hands worked within the confines of your panties. Then he asked, "Let's take these off, hmm?" You nodded. He started to do it, then looked at your face to confirm, "You want me to?"

"I can do it," you lifted your hips and slid them down, and once they were mid-thigh, he finished taking them off.

–

He lowered his torso against yours and his massive hand nudged your shoulder up toward him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and he lifted you into sitting. He traced the back neckline of the dress and murmured, "want this on or off?"

You shrugged.

"up to you, darlin'. But I sure would like to see ya." He kissed your neck and you could feel him smile against your skin. "If you're warm enough"

You were warm all over. You were so warm at your very core that it was hard to imagine ever being cold again. You asked, "you'll keep me warm, won't you?"

"Course I will."

You cracked a shy smile and planted your hands on the ground to lift your weight off the dress. Joel brought the dress up to your stomach, his fingers smearing it red, then you lifted your arms and he took it off. He planted delicate kisses on your chest at the base of your neck, and your shoulder as he gently nudged your bra straps off. Then he unclasped the back, and you let it fall in front of you. He put the bra aside and you were naked. He folded the dress into a pillow and put it under your head.

You looked at Joel's clothes and didn't say anything, but he replied to your silent question with a teasing smile. "no, I don't have to be so dressed..." you silently unbuttoned his pants, eye on his cock straining against the khakis, as he unbuttoned his shirt. Before pulling down the zipper, you traced the hard shape of his cock, and his chest let out a nearly imperceptible growl at your first rub.

He made quick work of the remaining shirt buttons, smearing a few of them red. His chest flexed as he peeled the sleeves down his bulging arms. He took his undershirt off over his head, tousling his hair, which he didn’t fix. It was the hottest you’d ever seen him. You were sitting back on your hands, naked body laid out for him. He looked at you lustily every few seconds as he took his pants off, then his boxers, leaving his commanding cock bobbing heavily before you. You pulled your eyes back up to his face and he looked at you adoringly.

–

He knelt on the blanket. Was this really going to happen? You reached out, and he nodded. You wrapped your hand around his shaft and whined, "I'm ready, you know I'm ready."

"Ready for what, darlin'?"

"To put our bodies together."

He nodded. "yeah, baby. You're ready. Gonna be real special."

He got between your legs where a fluttering ache was pounding, begging for relief. He held his cock in his hand. You felt your body making space for him. There was a place inside you that needed to be filled. He slowly lunged toward you and braced his hand on the blanket above your hip. He ran his tip through your dripping folds and his manhood further hardened. He spread the moisture over his cock. He laid his hard cock on your mound and brought his face to yours again. He rested about half his weight on top of you, his bare body flush with yours, his forearms braced on the blanket.

He kissed you deeply, grinding his erection against you, slick with your arousal and blood. Your lips embraced his and your mouth practically sucked in his tongue. He licked into you in rhythm with his slow thrusts against you. Your clit twitched against his cock and you lifted your hips, making him moan into your mouth. You needed him in you yesterday. You lifted your hips again and his mouth curved into a smile against your lips.

He reached between your legs and the breadth of his hand took up all the space. You whimpered at the first contact of the padding of his fingers with your naked heat. He slowly, lightly rubbed you as he kissed you, then slid his fingers down through your folds, gathering your moisture. He entered you with his middle finger, then his ring finger. You moaned into his mouth as his fingers slid all the way into your warm core. His cock swelled harder against your thigh as he pumped his thick digits in and out of you. He moaned softly, then added a third. Your hips rocked into his hand.

You were tense, afraid of coming too soon.

"Joel," you whimpered.

"Yeah baby," he murmured.

"What if I–ohh–what if I come too soon."

He chuckled, "you can come, baby," he kept working his fingers inside you, pressing his upper palm into your clit. You sighed and the tension swelled in your gut. "'s'a good thing, darlin'. gets ya ready for this." He rolled his stiff manhood against you as he said it. "Nice 'n ready."

"But Joel," you whined, unsure. "I want you inside"

"You wanna come on my cock?"

"Yeah, on your cock."

"Oh, baby," he moaned, his cock leaking against your thigh. "You will, baby. You will. You'll come again."

"Really?

He nodded. "Yeah. C'mon darlin, You'll come on my cock, too."

His eyes were sincere. He returned his attention to your clit and you let go. As you began to contract, he slid his fingers back inside you. "Oh, good girl," he sighed as you squeezed his fingers. "Like that, don't ya? Like squeezin' me?"

You nodded and whimpered, unable to speak as you rode out the orgasm.

"Oh, baby." He continued grinding against your hip and kissed you again as you recovered.

He pumped three fingers again, and under his breath, he muttered, "good. . .good." He moaned and pushed his hips against you. "Now I've got ya stretched, nice and relaxed."

"Joel," you begged. "Are you gonna–"

“Oh darlin’, I’m comin’.” he whispered. “Ready to be full of me?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. "Fill me with you," you begged. "Put it in."

“Givin’ each other everything now,” he reminded you. “Can’t get it back.”

You nodded, “you can have it all.”

“And I’m gonna give it to ya, too.”

You nodded and your walls twitched in anticipation.

"Gonna give it all to ya."

He read your eyes and as you got lost in the black holes of his pupils, the clear fibers of his affection wrapped around you, tethering you to him and the moment. He pulled his hips back and his knees spread slightly. You spread your legs to make room. He looked between your legs and the affection on his face faded into desire. “My lands, peaches.”

He hovered over you. Your hands skimmed up his sides, and came to rest around his neck.

He used his hand to notch himself at your entrance and pushed his tip inside, stretching you open. You gasped softly, breasts heaving in anticipation of the rest of it. You dragged your feet toward your butt on the blanket, lifting your knees to frame his hips.

“I love you, baby,” he whispered, and put his forehead against yours.

“I love you too,” you whined, brows furrowed.

His forehead lifted off yours, his lips returned to your mouth, and his hips pressed forward, inching his cock into you with a stretch. His lips broke away from yours and his mouth stayed open. He watched your face as his girth spread you open, dividing your walls. You gasped and nodded for more. He pushed further, taking you apart from yourself inch by inch. You imagined even a smidgen more girth wouldn’t feel good. He bowed his head and backed out an inch of his length, watching your body suck him back in as he pushed in a little more than he had before.

“God damn,” he whispered, then wet his lips as he looked back up at you with half his length sheathed in your warmth.

“You feel so good, joel”

“Oh, darlin’,” he breathed. “You got no idea.”

“I want it all,” you begged.

He nodded, “Okay, baby.” then slowly pushed his hips forward, gradually burying his length with some effort, stuffing you full of him. “Oh, darlin’.” The look of pain on his face told you how hard he was trying not to slam into you. He was slow and gentle, and his tip pushed through your core with even more heft than you imagined. Each inch of him spread you more and filled you fuller than you thought you could be. Your body made more space and he took it up right away.

“Joel,” you breathed.

He whispered your name and said, “you’re doin’ so good.” His flesh didn’t just complete you, it made you more than you were. He took you apart and made you something new, something wrapped around him so tight. “almost there, baby.” And then he groaned “Ohhhh, god,” as you swallowed up the rest of him. It was a perfect fit.

You whimpered as he came to a rest. His cock filled up the whole space and made more for itself. The fuzz of his balls brushed your skin. Your mouth hung open and you breathed, savoring the fullness of feeling him there inside you for the first time.

“Oh, darlin’,” he sighed, staying all the way inside you. He pressed his lips into yours, then pulled back and asked, “You okay?”

You nodded, happy tears prickling your eyes. His brows knitted.

“Are you okay?” you asked.

He nodded. “First time in years,” he whispered, and looked up at the tree. His cock twitched inside you and his tip nudged your cervix. “You tell me when you’re ready, baby.”

“I’m ready,” you nodded.

He looked you in the eyes again. “Our life starts now.” He withdrew most of his length, then let it back into you, his belly flush with yours while his cock dragged heavily inside you. He closed his eyes as your bodies became flush again. He retreated again at a snail’s pace, then pushed in a little faster.

“Saved this just for me, didn’t ya?”

He met your eyes again, then added, “Never be anyone else.”

He lowered his face for another kiss. Each time his flesh filled you up you could hardly believe how your body hugged him. It was like your body had been waiting for him all along. It really had been. This was what your bodies were made to do. Complete each other.

He looked at you and his brow furrowed again.

You asked, "What? What, Joel?"

“Now that I’ve been inside ya,” he breathed, "I’m not sure I know how not to be.”

You knew exactly how he felt. You couldn't bear the thought of being pulled apart.

He reached a slow but steady rhythm, gently filling you with his cock. You traced his shoulder, then his bicep. His bare stomach was resting against your skin, his happy trail touching you with each thrust m. He had about half his weight on you, and he let gravity help as he thrust into you. You imagined it as a magnetism. Each time he retreated, your bodies pulled back together. He bowed his head and watched himself disappear between your legs, and watched your body clinging to his shaft, hugging him tight, trying to pull him back in, not letting him go. “God damn, baby,” he breathed as he watched. “most beautiful thing I ever seen.”

When your caress reached the crook of his elbow, he braced on one forearm so he could take your hand and interlace.his fingers with yours. He held your hand to his chest and whispered, “All yours, darlin’,” his hips still moving, his cock sliding snugly against every ridge of you .

You nodded tearfully, pressing your palm into his chest, feeling the soft hair and the hard muscle.

“Every beat of it, peaches.”

Your other hand cupped his cheek, then slid up to tangle in his hair as his face returned to yours, kissing you as he buried his length in you. When your faces separated, you watched the surreal beauty of his form – his messy hair, his tan skin glimmering, his brown eyes flickering with affection as he filled you to the brim with his flesh.

“Oh, baby, you feel so good”

“I–I’m so–it’s so–”

“Packed full of it, aren’t ya baby?”

You nodded. “It’s so much,” you whispered. “But not too much,” you quickly added. “‘s’perfect.”

“So perfect, darlin’--Ohhh god, baby-–always knew ya were.”

All you saw was him, and the rhythm of his chest over yours. Beneath his heavy breaths and moans, leaves danced in the breeze, birds chirped, and the occasional piece of fruit thumped in the distance as it hit the ground. “Oh baby, I've been starvin’ for this.” His hips moved steadily, filling you with his cock every second or so, whispering your name here and there, marveling at your beauty.

“It feels so good, Joel.”

“how’s it feel?”

“Meant to be there,” you whispered, then sighed as his cock dragged through your core, completing you again. “Like it’s filling my body” More than that–it was creating space for itself, space you didn’t have before, that's the part you didn't expect. It was moving the most intimate parts of you out of the way and replacing them with him.

You tried to describe it. “It’s like –” He lowered his mouth to your neck and sucked “--oh, joel–it’s–it’s–.”

“Oh, baby,” he sighed against your neck, his hips moving steadily. “I know it, darlin’,” he murmured, grinding his pelvis into yours with each smooth thrust. He slowed his hips, still grinding against you, stiff cock dragging inside you. “Meant to be right here.” Your leg wrapped around him and his thrusts became more measured, his pelvis closer against you, grinding into your clit. “Meant to be fillin’ you.”

The pleasure was swirling, nearly coming to a boil in your gut, humming for release against his front, around his cock. “I love you,” you breathed, lifting your hips into his.

“Ohhh, baby I love you too,” he whispered with a smile and near laugh. “‘n’ I love how ya take it.” His eyes darted around your face affectionately, then he bowed his head to look at where your bodies met. “Look so pretty wrapped around this cock,” he looked back up at you with bright, glistening eyes. “Look so pretty, peaches.” Your clit twitched. His movements had your hips lifting into him all on their own. “Yeah, that’s right, darlin’.” You let yourself grind up into him. “Jus’ like that,” he whispered, his body grinding against your mound as his cock moved within you. The tension hummed louder and tightened your core on the edge of bliss. You both moaned.

“Now I want ya to come, peaches,” he said in a serious tone. “Ohh, oh baby—want ya to come and squeeze me real good, can ya do that?”

You nodded, biting your lip, vision getting blurry with the moisture in your eyes. You couldn't take any more tension but unsure if or when the peak would overtake you.

“C’mon, I got ya,” he breathed as you teetered on the edge. “Breathe, baby. c’mon.” You remembered to breathe, his pelvis grinded into yours again, and then you whimpered as the tension burst. “Jo–ohhhh,” your voice was shaky as it overtook you. Your clit spasmed and each wave pulsed outward through your body. Your tears overtook your eyelashes as you moaned and gasped. Your walls clamped down around his cock, and he groaned.

“You–Ohgoddamn,” he muttered as though losing control. Then he groaned, bottomed out hard, and erupted with a shudder. A burst of warmth flooded your core, then your whole body. He dipped his head to kiss you as he came. His cock pulsed into your walls again and again and your walls squeezed in return. His lips pressed into yours, then his tongue. He kissed you and moaned into your mouth. He sucked and gently bit your bottom lip as he filled you. He was filling you all the way up, every single part of you full of him, his essence rushing through you.

There was before this and after this, you finally got it, after all this time he tried to make you see. You understood everything. Like how there was so much beauty left in the world, and it was right there between you. It wasn’t an abstract wish, it was the physical presence of you and him, your bodies together, pulsing against each other’s most intimate parts, his seed spilling into you, his lips on yours, your bodies inseparable, on the ground in the orchard. You saved it for him. Your whole life led to him.

His kiss became more tender as he finished coming. He pulled back and his eyes glistened as he read your face.

You locked eyes for what felt like forever, with Joel still breathing heavily, most of his weight on top of you.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too.”

His eyes fell to your mouth and he kissed you again. “gonna pull out now, okay?”

Your lip trembled and your temples felt weak at the idea of your bodies not being joined. He could tell.

“It’s okay, darlin’. We’ll lay here, long as ya want.” He nodded at you and raised his eyebrows for permission to pull out.

You bit your lip and nodded.

He lay half on top of you, with a hand on your breast. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” you whispered. “How did it–how was it?”

“Like nothin’ i’ve ever known, baby.” He sucked in a shaky breath that made you look down at his face and his cheeks were wet.

–

You took a short nap like that, naked under the peach tree, until a dead leaf fell and tickled your arm and you jolted awake. A bird cawed at your sudden movement, and Joel asked, "you okay?"

When you got up, you only put your underwear back on. Joel wrapped you in one of the blankets, put his arm around you as he brought you back inside.

As you were walking back to the house, you heard the car noise again, toward the front of the orchard, and you froze, your eyes wide, looking toward the street. But this time it came with a breeze and the rustling of leaves.

“Just the wind, darlin’. What’s got ya so jumpy?”

“I dunno,” you mumbled. “Sorry.”

You didn’t realize you were jumpy. Maybe since you found out Bill and Frank could come home soon, you kept expecting them.

—-

When you got back inside, he laid the dress across the back of a chair in the living room and traced one of several red smudges with his fingers. There was bright red and dark red. "See? It's beautiful." He patted your hair. "gonna remember this forever."

He ran a bath. You sat on the edge of the garden tub as the bath filled up, and he kneeled in front of you in his boxers. He curled his fingers into the waistband of your panties and you stood up as he helped you take them off. There was diluted blood drying on your inner thighs. He dipped a sponge into the hot water to clean you. When you noticed a bit of his cum leaking out of you, it made you sad. You hoped he’d give you more.

Joel got in the tub first, then you got between his legs and laid back. You laid in silence for a while, then said, “I loved that." Hearing yourself in the bathtub sounded crisper than usual.

“What’d ya love, darlin'.”

“I love having you inside me.”

“Oh, baby, it’s my favorite place to be.”

"Good”

His cock twitched against your lower back. “‘Course it is, baby.” He kissed the crown of your head.

"I feel empty now"

"'S'okay, darlin'. You're s'posed to. 'S'posed to want somethin' there." His hand came between your legs and gently fingered your floating curls.

He shifted his hips under you. "Gotta pace yourself, but it'll feel better and better, I promise."

"Okay."

"We’ll rest up and do it again later."

"Yeah."

—---------

That night, you did it again. He was deep inside you, pressing sweet kisses into your neck as you whimpered beneath him.

“How’s it feel,” he murmured into your neck. “Still feel good?”

“Feels good,” you whined

“S’only gonna get better, baby. Better every day.” He slowly retreated, then sighed "ohh, baby" as he filled you with his cock again. He was still fucking you slowly, carefully, grunting and moaning with your whimpers and sighs. His hair was messed up again, moving to the beat of his thrusts, and his neck veins were bulging.

There was a loud rap at the door, startling you both. Joel’s hand reflexively covered your mouth as he froze, then composed himself and completed one last slow thrust, one that felt even better with you frozen in fear.

“Gonna be okay, baby,” he whispered, then pulled out. He slowly released his hand from your mouth, pressing a kiss into your lips. Your eyes were wide. You hadn't heard the car over your mutual pleasure. "Gonna be okay," he repeated.

He pulled on a pair of jeans and white t-shirt. He took a gun out of his nightstand. There was another loud rap at the door, longer this time. A deep voice with the same drawl as your husband. “JOEL, IT’S ME. OPEN UP.”

Joel looked at you and whispered, "Tommy."

Joel put the gun in the back of his jeans and shut the bedroom door behind him.

—--

The front door creaked as Joel opened it. “Tommy.” You heard the slapping of a hand on a back as they greeted each other, then the door closed. “Didn’t know ya were comin’, woulda gotten a room ready or–”

"Just dropped off Bill ‘n Frank.”

“Shhhh.”

“Hey, what the hell's goin' on? Where's the kid?”

“Tell’em she’s safe. Asleep upstairs."

"You don't think she'd wanna see'em?"

"No sense in wakin' her up."

There was a long pause, then Joel asked, “Why’d ya drive’em?"

“Their truck gave out.” After a long pause, Tommy added “Frank said somethin’s off with you.”

“What're you talkin’ about? Why would Frank said that?”

"Said ya smiled. Made'em uneasy."

Joel scoffed. "I was bein' nice."

Tommy laughed. "I told'em you're weird about hospitals, prolly overcompensatin'. Told'em everything's fine. . ."

Joel said, "good, ‘cause everything is."

"You gonna invite me in?"

"Come on in." A few footsteps, then the front door shut.

Tommy asked, “She’s upstairs?”

Tommy’s boots thudded away from Joel's bedroom, toward the stairs.

“Tommy, wait.”

Tommy didn’t wait. Two sets of footsteps climbed the stairs, with Joel’s quieter steps following Tommy's boots. You couldn't hear their conversation. A door opened and closed upstairs. Then another. And another. You turned the ring on your finger.

Footsteps, then indistinct heated words.

The lighter set of footsteps descended the stairs with the boots following behind. Tommy's voice got closer on the way down the stairs. “somethin’ ain't right here.”

The front door locked before Tommy made it down.

Joel was calm. “Slow down, take a breath.”

Tommy replied, “I don’t like that look you’re givin’ me, brother.”

Joel told him, “You need to sit down and listen to me.”

“Joel, if I don’t come back, Bill’s comin’ over here.”

"She's safe," Joel insisted. "C'mere, let's have a drink."

The footsteps faded into the living room, then stopped abruptly. "What the hell's that?" The footsteps slowly resumed, then stopped again. Then, the rustling of fabric. Tommy's voice was shaky. "What the hell is this, Joel?"

"Shhhhh. Ain't what ya think."

"Don't look like it," Tommy laughed in bad humor, then composed his nerves into calm anger. "What'd you do, Joel?"

"Nothin', Tommy. It’s her period, damn. Now sit down."

"I may be the only one who knows how dangerous you are, but don't act like I don't fuckin’ know.”

Your heart skipped a beat.

Joel responded, “You don’t."

You held your neck, looking around the room. Your pulse was pounding against the heel of your palm.

“I don't? What the hell’s that s'posed to mean?”

“I’m in love with her, Tommy." Your heart swelled.

"Jesus. . ."

Tommy mumbled something else, and Joel responded, “She's not a kid."

"She's Bill's kid," Tommy countered.

"Not anymore. And I’ll do anything to keep her." After a pause, Joel added, “I mean anything.”

"I fuckin' know you do," Tommy snapped.

"Then we’re clear," Joel said. "Tell'em ya didn't wanna wake her up."

"Not ‘til I see her," Tommy insisted.

There was a beat of silence, then Joel offered, "Cool off first, have a drink. Don't wanna scare her."

Your heart raced. Their voices became indistinct as they moved towards the kitchen.

—---------

You sat on the bed stunned. Your parents were home, and you weren't as happy as you imagined you'd be to hear it. You were wholly preoccupied by Tommy's words. Joel was dangerous. You had already come to know it in your heart, but hearing someone else say it out loud had your mind racing. You never thought about what that meant for you. The worst part was the fear in Tommy’s voice. Would Joel do something to Tommy? His own brother? They were family. You and Joel were family.

You got up and went into Joel's closet. You pulled out a flannel and put it on over your nightgown. You built up your courage, then slowly opened Joel’s bedroom door.

—---------------

You emerged from the bedroom, unsure how either of them would react. You pulled the flannel over your hands, hiding the ring. As you tiptoed into the living room, Joel was on the sofa facing away from you. Tommy was facing you and saw you first. He was holding a mostly empty glass of whiskey. Joel's glass was already empty on the coffee table. Tommy sat upright and swallowed. He put his glass down on the side table.

“Hey,” Tommy's voice was soft, like he didn't want to startle you. “You okay?”

Joel looked over his shoulder, then turned his body.

“Yeah,” you nodded and walked over to them, looking at Joel. Joel's face softened as he looked at you. You sat on one of Joel’s thighs, your bare feet on the floor holding some of your weight.

“They're home, darlin’,” Joel said and looked at you with pleading eyes. “wanna go now, or let’em get some rest, see’em in the mornin’?”

You didn’t hesitate. “Let’em get some rest.”

Tommy sat back and raised his eyebrows in surprise. When you looked right at him, the dress caught your eye on the other chair and your chest felt hot.

Joel cradled your head with one hand and kissed you on the cheek. “Ok, peaches. Give Uncle Tommy a kiss goodnight, then go back to bed."

You looked at Joel hesitantly. He nodded toward Tommy and flexed his jaw.

Tommy watched you curiously as you approached. You gave him a loose hug around the neck and the lightest peck on the cheek.

“Night, sweetie,” Tommy mumbled.

You went back to Joel's lap and put your arms around his neck. He looked at you and you searched his eyes. He gave you a chaste kiss on the lips and whispered, "Go on. I'll be there soon," with a wink. His hand was big and warm on your back as you stood up to walk away.

—

Before you closed the bedroom door behind you, Tommy said, "Okay, she's not a kid. . . Don't mean it's right."

Their conversation became indistinct until Tommy was leaving a few minutes later.

Joel said, “I’ll leave it unlocked. You can stay upstairs.”

The front door opened and closed.

—------

You weren't planning on it but as soon as the front door began to close, your legs carried you into Joel's bathroom, and your shaking hand closed the door. You sat on the tiled floor against the door. Your heart pounded. Joel would never do anything to hurt you. Why was your body reacting this way? Your eyes felt weak. You didn't want him to see you scared or upset, but this couldn't be much better. You closed your eyes and tried to get back to that place you were in the orchard where everything in the universe made sense.

Joel came into the bedroom and shut the door behind him. "Aw, baby" he said to himself as he realized where you were. He took off his pants and put the gun back in the drawer, then approached the bathroom door. "You in there, peaches?”

“Yeah,” you managed weakly.

“Can I come in?” Joel tried to open the door and found it was locked.

“Not now.” You wanted to stop crying first.

After a moment of silence, he slid down the other side of the door and sat down. “Can ya talk to me, baby?”

You sniffled, then whined, “I dunno what to say.”

Joel sighed and you heard the soft thud of his head resting against the other side of the door. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” you whimpered.

“We’re a family now, baby. Gotta work through whatever you’re feelin’.”

You scooted back and slowly opened the door.

Joel came in and sat on the tile next to you, your backs against the door. He stroked your thigh. His voice was soft. “Wanna come back to bed or wanna talk in here?”

“Here.”

“Okay,” he whispered. He was studying your eyes, desperate to read them.

You winced with a cramp and put your hand where it hurt. He went to get you a pill and came back. He handed you the pill and a glass of water. “Want me to run you a bath?”

You shook your head no. You didn't need a third bath.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“What’s wrong?” you repeated.

You looked at him, hating the fact that he was going to make you ask him. Earlier, you said you didn't want to know. You wanted it to stay an abstract, romantic concept that he would kill for you. But the way Tommy was talking, you felt like you needed something. You felt like you needed to know Joel better.

Joel took a deep breath in through his nose. His voice was soft and careful. “Tommy’s my brother, and I love’m, but .. .sometimes, brothers. . . .” He was searching for words, and at the same time, searching your face for an out. He gave up and his voice dropped an octave. “What’d ya hear, darlin’?”

You heard the words come out of your mouth before you could stop them. "How'd you kill him?"

Joel squinted and searched your face. “Who?”

“What happened to Jesse?” you asked. Joel looked up at the ceiling and his nostrils flared. His chest expanded with a calming breath. You continued, “I don’t care about him at all. I don’t even care if you killed him but I wanna know."

"Thought ya didn't wanna know."

"Now I do."

“I dunno if that’s a good idea, peaches.”

“You said you’d do anything for me. This is what I need, I need you to tell me.”

Joel sighed and swallowed, then nodded. “There was an accident.”

"What kind of accident?"

"He fell."

“What? Like from a tree?”

“No, when he was diggin’.”

You felt lightheaded imagining the garden beds, and the way Joel tucked the pumpkin flower behind your ear. Something told you he was still out there. You tried not to show anything on your face.

You asked, “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“‘Cause it was my fault. I scared him. Didn't want ya to be afraid."

“What happened?“

“Won’t do ya any good knowin’ that, darlin’.” Joel sighed. “Might make ya feel bad.”

“I don’t care, just tell me.” What bothered you was that it wasn't even serious with the boy. It was nothing like it was with Joel. So Joel didn't have to do whatever he did. All Joel had to do was love you and you would've dropped everything else in an instant. All Joel had to do was hug you. You really believed that.

“He was gonna hurt ya, darlin'." You found that hard to believe, but heard him out. You reflexively squinted but tried not to look too skeptical.

"Hurt me how."

“He was talkin’ like. . . he was talkin’ disrespectful.”

Your face burned, thoughts flying around in your head about what he possibly could have said.

Joel did a double take at your face and noticed how embarrassed you were. “Darlin’, you really don’t need to be hearin’ this.”

“Just tell me.”

"So when he tried to touch ya. . .”

“You were watching us?”

“I was worried, darlin’. Just lookin’ out for ya.”

“So you saw me stop it, then.”

“Sure did, and I was proud of ya.” There was nothing to be proud of. It wasn't on any moral grounds, you were just nervous in Joel's orchard. And apparently, you had every reason to be.

“So what happened?”

“So, next time we were workin', it came up again. . ."

Your mouth felt dry.

Joel continued, "I told him that’s not how to treat a woman, that you deserved better.”

Your heart pounded. “And you were really mad, that's why he fell.”

Joel nodded, and you nodded. You could picture the rest of it, but you didn't want to. You imagined that when he fell, that wasn't the end of it.

You took his hand. “Thank you for telling me.”

Joel kissed your hand and breathed a sigh of relief.

“And thanks for doing that," you added.

Joel squinted at you, taken aback. “Doin’ what, darlin’?”

“Whatever you had to do. . . for me.”

Joel studied your face as though it might have been a trick. It wasn’t. He slowly nodded. He kissed your hand again. “You don’t hate me.”

“Of course I don’t hate you, I love you.”

Joel’s eyes watered. “This is true love, baby. Unconditional.”

You asked, “Can I ask you something else?”

“Anything, peaches.”

"Who else?”

"Uh," Joel squinted.

"I asked you how you killed him, and you asked who."

"Oh, darlin'," he chuckled.

"Did Abe really leave?"

Joel inhaled then puffed out his cheeks as he let out the breath and hesitantly shook his head no.

“He was in bad shape when I found him. Gettin’ sick, talkin’ crazy..”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were already scared. . . didn’t wanna make it worse.”

You barely nodded, trying to process all this, wondering if there was more to it, but consciously pushing the thought away. You wondered whether you would've been more or less scared if you knew something happened to Abe.

"You're a smart girl, peaches."

“What’d Tommy mean when he said you’re dangerous?”

Joel wiggled his jaw and looked away, then back at you. “I’ve made some mistakes. Used to let my temper get the best of me.” He looked down. “Don’t drink like I used to.”

He scooted around on the tile to face you. He picked up both your hands and looked at you with big, pleading eyes. “But no matter what, you gotta believe I would never, ever hurt you, baby." His eyes were glistening. "There’s no part'a me that would. I’d sooner hurt myself.”

You looked at his mouth and just as you saw the smallest quiver, he wet his lips and swallowed.

You whispered, “I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”

“Good.” He sighed in relief.

You took your hands away and tightened the flannel around you, then said, “and you wouldn’t hurt anyone I love, because that would hurt me."

Joel swallowed and inhaled through his nose, waiting uncomfortably for you to continue.

You looked at each other for a few seconds, then you asked, “Are Bill and Frank gonna be okay here?”

He looked away, then back at you before muttering, “I hope so, darlin'.”

“Even if we can't be together right away?”

Joel squinted at you incredulously. “What're you talkin’ ‘bout, can’t be together?" He scoffed coldly, making your temples hurt. "I’m sure as hell not lettin’ Tommy tell me what to do. You gonna let them tell you what to do?”

“No. . .” You didn’t know what else to say.

“We talked about this, darlin’. You change your mind?”

You shook your head. “Guess I’m still nervous. Thought maybe it'd take time."

Joel clenched his jaw, opened his mouth to speak. Then closed it again. When he did speak, he was calm and measured. “There’s no scenario where we’re not together, peaches." He raised his eyebrows at you and added flatly, "We promised each other forever.”

“I know,” you whispered.

“And I meant it,” he added with a hint of accusation.

You protested, “I did, too.” You did.

"Well I still mean it."

"I do, too." You weren't lying. Somehow, you didn't want it any less. If anything, your heart wanted it more. You wondered if you went too far in your questions.

He pried your hands off the flannel to hold them. You tried to relax but your hands were still tense.

He dipped his head to make eye contact with you and didn't blink. “You and me together. No matter what.” He closed his eyes for a breath and sighed. When his eyes met yours again, he added, “No matter where.”

Your heart fluttered.“No matter where?”

He nodded with a deep inhale through his nose. His eyes wandered, then found yours again. “yeah, no matter where."

This tugged at your heart. Was he really willing to take you out?

"There's another town . . . Ain't easy gettin’ there, but I reckon if we're real careful. . .”

You pondered it silently. You wanted to see the world outside, but you never thought about moving. You wanted to live with Joel on this land forever, but you wanted your parents to be okay, too. Leaving altogether seemed so sudden, so huge.

You asked, “Really? You would take me out?”

“Scares me to death,” he admitted. "But I just wanna be with you, peaches."

You stayed quiet for a minute.

"Ain't right they kept ya here all your life," he muttered.

The thought of leaving forever was scary, but if that's what it took to keep your parents safe, you would. Joel was your home anyway. You could feel at home anywhere with him.

You asked, “Would I get to say goodbye?”

His mouth tensed and he looked at the floor.

"Not out loud," you conceded. "But could I see them again first?"

He was quiet, reading your face. "If that's what ya need," he nodded somberly.

“Spend a little time with them?” You asked.

“How much time?” Joel countered.

“I don’t know, a few days?”

“You wanna be apart that long?”

“No, but. . . no”

Joel sighed. “Let’s figure this out tomorrow, k?”

He cradled your head and whispered, “We’ll figure it out.” He pressed his lips into yours, giving you the slowest, most tender kiss. He pulled back and your eyes clouded up.

“I love you,” you whispered. “More than anything.”

He nodded, tears in his eyes.

You added, “And there’s no ‘but’. I’ll go anywhere to be with you.”

He pulled you into straddling him. Your arms wrapped around him all on their own and you were soothed. It was true, you had given him everything. You were hollow without it, without him. But up against his body, wrapped in his big arms, you felt complete again. You felt safe.

You could feel his manhood beneath you, warm and soft. He hugged you tight and drew in a ragged breath. He held you and stroked your head for a minute. His cock hardened a little with your crotch against it. You were beginning to feel the painkiller. “Sorry, baby,” he whispered. You yawned. “Thought we’d have more time.” The front door opened, and you flinched.

“Just Tommy," Joel whispered. "He’s gonna stay upstairs tonight, okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s go to bed, baby.”

You braced yourself with your hands on his shoulders and stood up. He hooked his thumbs under the flannel collar to help you take it off, but you pulled it tighter around yourself.

Joel pulled his hands away, then rubbed your back. "Okay, darlin'."

You got in bed, curled up on your side. Joel draped his arm over you and asked, “this okay?”

“Yeah,” you nodded and loosely laced your fingers with his in front of you.

“‘S’gonna be fine, baby. We’ll figure it out.”

“I don’t wanna be apart,” you sniffled.

“We’re not gonna be,” he reassured you. “Ever.”

-----

THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER. AND YOU WILL HAVE MORE SEX.

However, this is on soft hiatus until after Halloween unless i really feel like putting out the next chapter. Too many seasonal things to cook.

Thank you so much for reading and engaging <3

I'll reblog or comment with Lincoln tag list.

@toxicfics for notifications. The tag list is not long for this world.

All Joel:@ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea @evyiione @xdaddysprincessxx @queerly-anxious @chernayawidow @ambassadortotrilliusprime @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @jasminespringtime @romanarose @fandomsfallnomore @djarinxore @blackvelveteen1339 @manazo @wolvesandvampires @taeslarityy @str84pedro @lokanda @kyloispunk @filthfairy @fieryglutenfreechickennoodles @harriedandharassed @moonlightdivine @worhols @fan-fiction-floozy @cutesyscreenname @weddingfairy @pedropascal-whore @spideysimpossiblegirl @feministfanboi @gracieispunk @prettypartyfavor @am-3-thyst @babeincolor @milla-frenchy @switchbladedreamz @within-the-depths @am-3-thyst @may-machin @pedromania91 @sloanexx @paleidiot @yourmistysecret @bean-is-reading

#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfic #dark!joel miller #joel miller x innocent!reader #joel miller x virgin!reader #toxicanonymity ☠️#lincoln!joel #lincoln!joel ☠️#possessive!joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #tw arachnophobia #cw age gap

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subliminalbo · 1 year ago

Text

HYPNOSAPIEN

The sound moved through Mel. That was the only way she could describe it.

She had come to the club in River City following mysterious flyers about this new group, HYPNOSAPIEN, whose music could "take you to a place you've never been before." Believe it or not, Mel hadn't been into clubbing since high school, but Piper insisted—after everything that had gone down with the Alphas, it was nice to let loose a little.

To call it a club was a stretch. HYPNOSAPIEN was as DIY as they come, performing in secret venues around Romero. Tonight it was the abandoned warehouse on the corner of Lincoln Avenue and Third Street.

The girls in the band were charismatic, led by Iris Blalock on lead vocals, but the music didn't impress Mel. It was the usual club trash with over-reliance on heavy bass and an overzealous mix of synthesizer that drowned out the live vocals. But Mel's biggest complaint? All their music sounded the same! That droning, wall-to-wall buzz cut between Iris' simple lyrics:

"Sink, sink, sink, sink, drop, drop, drop, drop."

After the third song though, Mel realized that the droning wasn't just a hum, but another set of vocals hidden deep in the mix. She tried to decipher the words, but they weren't even English. They didn't even sound human. And as she focused on the strange words, she began unconsciously following Iris' lyrics.

"Sink, sink, sink, sink, drop, drop, drop, drop."

And then the sound moved through her.

Mel turned to Piper to see if her friend had felt it too, but Piper was already on her knees, misty eyes locked on the duo on stage. She had torn her shirt open to grope at her small breasts, her mouth gaping as she begged to be taken deeper by "The Message."

"Oh, fuck..." Mel moaned. The meaning in the sound's inhuman words were suddenly as clear to her as if spoken in English. One-by-one members of the audience fell to their knees in uninhibited ecstasy, their cries of pleasure mixing with the music.

Mel, too, dropped, her fingers sinking between the folds of her soaked pussy.

Oh Christ, it was happening again. She was losing her mind just like she had in the basement of the Alphas house, but this was something more than a virtual reality light show. It was a total transformation, an awakening to a new state of being.

The audience chanted the lyrics hidden in the music, and Mel joined their cries: "I am the Birth of a new species! I will Prepare my body and my mind for the Great Arrival!"

But it wasn't enough just to feel herself. Mel forced Piper down to the grimy floor, pressing her lips and tongue to her nipples, her hand finding its way to Piper's pussy. Piper uttered a satisfied moan but continued the chant unbroken, "I will Fill whatever need is expected! I will Preach, I will Build, I will Breed!"

The show only spiraled from there as the hypnotized audience fucked each other senseless. Clothes shredding, bodies upon bodies. The audience paired off in twos and threes and fours, ignoring superficial details like sexual orientation or who came with who. They clawed, and sucked, and licked, and fucked, and sweated, and came. Cocks filling any holes, pussies pressed to any lips. There was no one left in the room who didn't feel The Message move through them, no one who wasn't chanting its words now.

Even the two members of HYPNOSAPIEN stopped playing. Iris took her band mate Kayla by the hair and pressed her face to her pussy. The recorded music droned on in time with the orgy. The audience fucked late into the night, The Message's programming sinking so deep into their minds that it became a permanent fixture of their existence, taking everyone to a place they'd never been before. A place they never wanted to return from.

This is a companion to Classified Information #2: The Sound Shout out to @shotgungt for the band name HYPNOSAPIEN

#hypnokink #mind control #hypno story #brainwashed #covert hypnosis #is this an extended riff on the idea of using “hypnosapien” in place of slave #yes yes it is #mass brainwashing #mass hypnosis

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bumblesimagines · 8 months ago

Text

Our Flickering Light

Part 2

Request: Yes or No

~~~

"You ever been this far from home?"

"Ellie."

"What? I'm just asking!"

There was something humorous in the way Ellie and Joel treated each other. The exasperation that weighed heavy on Joel's face whenever she so much as opened her mouth and the smugness that twinkled in her eyes when she saw Joel roll his eyes or purse his lips in annoyance. (Y/N) couldn't blame him much. The moment Lincoln had disappeared out of view, Ellie had leaned forward and shoved herself between the two seats, firing off question after question. For a girl with the fate of the world resting solely on her shoulders, she sure had a lot of energy and excitement. (Y/N) wondered if he'd been like her back then. Full of curiosity and awe.

"It's fine, Joel." (Y/N) dismissed with a soft chuckle and a wave of his hand. Joel glanced at him, furrowed brows full of uncertainty and even a hint of a warning of what was to come if he gave Ellie the green light to ask questions. (Y/N) smiled at the older man and Joel looked back at the road, his eyes flickering to the rearview mirror. He gave a small nod and Ellie beamed, once again wedging herself between the seats and making Joel click his tongue in disapproval.

"So, have you?" Ellie asked, her dark brown eyes wide and full of barely contained curiosity.

"I wasn't born in Lincoln, Ellie." (Y/N) chuckled at the quiet 'oh' that fell from her lips and her cheeks flushed pink from embarrassment, one finger lifting to sheepishly scratch the side of her head. "My mom and I were originally from Frederick, Maryland. We were able to get to the Baltimore QZ before it began turning people away. It's how we met Frank. We stayed there for a good... Jesus, I don't know, four or five years?"

"Why'd you leave?" Ellie blinked and cocked her head to the side, loose strands of her hair swaying over her pale skin. (Y/N) noticed Joel glance over Ellie's head, just as curious as the girl he'd previously scolded. (Y/N) exhaled through his nose and gazed back out to the long road ahead.

"It fell. None of us really knew why, but Frank said the day before it happened there'd been rumors about a breach in one of the walls that FEDRA couldn't be bothered to fix. The next day the QZ was in utter chaos. People were either panicking, stealing, getting trampled, or getting shot down by soldiers. Frank and his neighbor, Kelly, got us and we fled the QZ with a few other survivors." (Y/N) explained solemnly, the screams of citizens attempting to find safety still ringing as clear as day in his ears. "We traveled a week by foot trying to get to Boston since THE Philadelphia QZ only lasted two years and they were never able to clear any part of New York City to get one set up. We were a group of ten but by the time we got to Lincoln, it was only Frank, my mom, and me."

"Wait, so, you could've been in Boston with us? And you were born before the outbreak? But you look so young!" Ellie gaped at him and Joel snorted quietly, the muscles on his face straining to keep him from smiling at her words.

"I'm only twenty-nine, Ellie." (Y/N) laughed and her eyes widened further. "I was nine when the outbreak happened."

(Y/N) watched the teen boys bounce the basketball around in the road, their laughter echoing down the street and mixing in with the distant sound of honking. His mother stood by the dining room table with her phone in hand and pressed against her ear, reciting the address to the pizza place staff member. Her other hand ran circles around the barely there bump and her attention jumped between answering questions and looking at the clock.

"Can I go outside?" (Y/N) asked into his folded arms, his legs beginning to ache from standing at the window for so long. The basketball slammed into the board and bounced off the rim of the basket. A chorus of groans and laughter followed. "I'll stay in the driveway."

"It's dark out, sweets. Those boys will be heading to bed soon, anyway." Rose said as she set her phone on the dining table and approached him, her hand reaching out to rest on his shoulder. She smiled warmly down at him. "I'm sure if you ask Jonah tomorrow, he'll teach you how to play, alright?"

"Okay." (Y/N) sighed. "When is Brent-"

There was a sudden, distant explosion outside, close and loud enough to make the windows in the house shake and set off car alarms throughout the neighborhood. The neighborhood boys outside shouted and screamed in surprise, their long game of basketball abruptly forgotten in favor of turning around to watch a firey cloud rise into the air. Rose instinctively brought (Y/N) closer to her and grabbed the curtain to tug it further from the window.

"Oh, my god," She whispered and took his hand, clutching it tightly as they left the kitchen and opened the front door, stepping out onto their porch. (Y/N) could hear the porch swing still creaking from the force of the explosion and he leaned into the skirt of his mother's dress, peeking out from behind her legs. "Jonah, Tyler, you boys okay?! The rest of you need to get home right now!"

"Was that the gas station?" Jonah asked, holding his basketball tight to his chest as the rest of his friends scrambled to collect their things and call home. Tyler wasted no time in running across the street to his house and quickly heading inside the small house while his aunt's car blared in the driveway.

"You boys get to your parents, now!" A new, deeper voice boomed from next door and (Y/N) peered around his mother to look at their next-door neighbor, an intimidating veteran whom Brent enjoyed calling a 'hermit'. (Y/N) hardly ever heard him speak seeing as the man, Steven, spent most of his time out hunting or locked away in his run-down, unkept house. Steven turned to them, his white tank top soaked in sweat, and he hurried down his creaky porch steps to approach them.

"Steven, what's going on?"

"Rose, sweetheart, get your boy and pack some things, alright? There was a national alert on the radio-" Another explosion, one closer to the city.

(Y/N)'s body began to tremble and he clung tighter on his mother. Rose spun on her heel and hauled (Y/N) up into her arms, everything in his sight becoming a dark blur of their familiar living room and hallway. She set him down in front of his bedroom door and hurried inside, her swift hands snatching his school backpack from the floor and turning it upside down so everything inside clattered to the floor. She grabbed fistfuls of clothes from shirts, pants, and underwear before stuffing the free pockets of small books and toys.

"Here, baby, here." Rose returned to him and he stuck his arms through the gaps, feeling the straps weighing heavily down on his shoulders. (Y/N) watched her head down to hers and Brent's shared bedroom and heard her rummage through things as she'd done in his bedroom. Tears pricked the back of his eyes and he quickly wiped them away with the sleeve of his pajamas. He faced his bedroom again and approached his toy box, lifting the top open and sorting through his toys until he found Mr. Flops, his old favorite stuffed bunny that he'd hidden away after hearing some boys make fun of Gracie in class for still having a teddy bear.

"(Y/N), sweets, come on." His mother stood in the doorway with a duffle bag slung over her shoulder. She extended her hand out toward him and smiled encouragingly, wiggling her fingers until he took her hand again. Rose moved down the hallway again and reached the front door before stopping to scribble something down on the notepad she kept by the key holder. (Y/N) tightened his grip on her palm when they stepped outside and spotted Steven hauling some things into the back of his truck.

"Hurry, Rose!" He called and (Y/N)'s eyes widened at the sight of the shotgun strapped to his shoulder. Rose sighed quietly, locking the front door and gliding down the steps with her son in tow. She took the two bags and squeezed them into the small backseat, ensuring they'd remain still and not squish (Y/N) at any rapid turn during the ride.

"Where are we going?" He asked tentatively and peered up at his mother.

"I-"

"Shit," Steven hissed, and (Y/N) turned around to see Tyler rushing out of his house only to trip on the last step and fall into the grass by the driveway. His aunt staggered out of the house after him, her body movements jerky and weird, both limp and stiff. Tyler scrambled on the grass that had been wet by the sprinklers only minutes before the first explosion, the slippery grass preventing him from getting back on his feet. "Get in the truck, now."

"It's just Becca, Steven," Rose said breathlessly, her hands reaching out toward her son to pull him close.

"No, sweetheart," Steven sighed and lifted the shotgun, pointing it directly in Mrs. Gorman's direction. His finger slipped over the trigger. "That's not her anymore."

"What happened to Steven?" Ellie asked gently, her head fully propped up on her fist as she stared at him, completely engrossed by the story. A grimace had appeared on Joel's face toward the end, an all too knowing look passing over his dark eyes. The panic, confusion, the way the world turned upside down in a matter of hours... it was something the new generation of children like Ellie never got to experience. Instead of knowing the joy of running around freely, of visiting different cities and states. All they knew was the fear and death that followed.

"I don't know," (Y/N) admitted softly. "But knowing him... he's probably still around trying to help people."

"I bet he and Joel would've been buds," Ellie said, slumping back in her seat and wiggling closer to the window, propping one arm along it and staring out at the passing scenery. (Y/N) exhaled in amusement and glanced at Joel when the older man rolled his eyes, still as silent as always. What a pair they made. A young chatterbox and an older man who could spend days without speaking. But it was part of his charm, in a way. Silent but always observing, always watching over everyone.

"Looks like a gas station up ahead," Joel murmured gruffly, pointing out the tall sign in the distance. (Y/N) could see abandoned cars scattered around, many of them long overtaken by nature. The station itself appeared in similar conditions, worn down and overgrown. No sign of infected around. "We'll pull over for a little while and get some gas. Use the bathroom if you have to. We ain't stoppin' until we need to again, alright?"

"Yep." Ellie sighed, reaching for her backpack and slipping her arms through the straps.

Slowly pulling over and stopping the truck, the three hopped out of the truck and surveyed their surroundings. Joel cautiously stepped forward, fingers tightly wrapped around his pistol and his head on a swivel, turning sharply whenever he heard the faintest sounds. (Y/N) shifted around the strap of his sniper rifle and walked toward the gas station, hearing the soft patter of Ellie following after him. He pushed the dirty glass door open and peeked inside, waiting for movement or noise before stepping inside fully and looking around the store. It appeared largely empty and scarce, anything still up on the shelves or fallen on the ground either rotten or useless.

(Y/N) headed further into the store and purposefully kicked a can, listening to it rattle against the tile floor and fall into silence once it hit the wall. Nothing. No sound of any animals scurrying to hide, no infected crawling out from the darkness. For safe measure, he checked each room, only finding a long-decayed corpse in the storage closet and a caved-in bathroom. With no urge to release his bladder, he turned toward Ellie and smiled. "Seems safe enough. If you need to go, go ahead. Holler if you need or see anything, 'kay?"

"Gotcha." Ellie nodded and returned the smile, sliding the backpack off her shoulders and walking further into the bathroom. She set her backpack on the sink and glanced at him as he turned to leave. "Good luck with Joel." She told him with a playful grin and unzipped her backpack.

Chuckling, (Y/N) nodded and headed back into the store, checking behind the register for anything they'd need before leaving the store completely and heading toward Joel who'd taken it upon himself to siphon gas from the old cars. (Y/N) adjusted the rifle's strap again so it hung at his side instead of his chest and squinted through the glaring sun to watch Joel work. "Ellie's using the bathroom." He informed him, hearing a soft hum of acknowledgment.

"(Y/N)..." Joel began with a heavy sigh, pushing himself off his knee and picking up the gas canister from the ground. His lips pressed together, his tilted toward the ground as his brows furrowed once more. "I'm... I'm real sorry about your folks. They were good people."

"And so was Tess." (Y/N) added softly and Joel's features hardened into a grimace, his head turning away from him and his chest rising and falling with a heavy sigh. He made no move to respond or even acknowledge her but (Y/N) could see the pain etched all over his face. He could see the sorrow and pain Joel fought desperately to swallow down and ignore until it faded. "She had a good heart."

"Yeah." Joel forced out and inhaled sharply, his grip on the canister tightening. (Y/N) stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Joel's shoulder, feeling the man tense at his touch and become rigidly motionless. He could only feel Joel's chest moving with each quiet breath until, after a minute of nothing, his arm moved, sliding around (Y/N)'s body loosely at first before tightening with every emotion Joel had long buried under his hardened exterior. His forearm pushed against (Y/N)'s back, pressing them tightly together as Joel buried his face into the crook of (Y/N)'s neck. In a soft, muffled yet pained voice, he spoke, "I miss her."

"Frank used to say that you honor people by living for them... by living because of them. Who else will keep their memory alive is not us, Joel?" (Y/N) told him gently, rubbing his fingertips into Joel's shoulders.

"You are..." Joel interrupted himself with a soft chuckle as he leaned back, "Far too young to be sounding so old."

"I can't help it." (Y/N) smiled, dropping his arms from Joel's shoulders and crossing them over his chest. "You should've seen the books Bill and Frank had me reading."

"Yeah, I bet half of it was some crazy conspiracy shit." Joel snorted, his shoulders lightly shaking and a rare genuine smile spreading across his face. He had a breathy sort of withheld laugh, one that made him wonder how it'd sound when he found something especially funny, and the type of smile that made wrinkles form around his eyes.

"You have a pretty smile, Joel. You should do it more often." (Y/N) complimented, running his hand over Joel's bicep affectionately before dropping his hand to his side and turning around. He approached the next car down the line, dipping his arm in through the window of the car and popping open the flap. He wiped his hand clean of dust and dirt with his pant leg before unscrewing the cap for Joel. He stepped aside, finally taking note of the still man. "Joel?"

Joel blinked, gaze darting over to him and flickering toward the flap. "Right. Thanks." He cleared his throat, long legs moving toward the car. He kneeled down beside it, glancing up briefly when Ellie stepped out of the store and began walking toward them. She stood beside (Y/N) and looked down at Joel, watching him begin the siphoning process.

"We have to do this every hour?" Ellie questioned, one brow arching questioningly. It was easy to forget she hadn't been alive when cars were driven freely down the street instead of armored vehicles or tanks. She hadn't even known how to put a seatbelt on.

"Gas breaks down over time. This stuff's almost water." Joel explained. "Back in the day, we'd drive 10, 12 hours on one tank. You could go anywhere."

"So where'd you go?"

"Pretty much nowhere," Joel inhaled deeply, releasing that air into the tube. A few seconds later, gasoline poured into the other tube and down into the canister. Ellie blinked and perked up, that familiar curious twinkle appearing in her eyes again as she leaned her head forward to get a closer look.

"How does that work?" She asked, taking another step closer.

"It's a siphon," Joel answered, looking up at her and being met with a blank stare. "It's when... liquid travels against gravity... because pressure-"

"You don't know," Ellie stated simply and giggled when Joel shot her a look. Sticking her hands in her pockets and spinning around to face (Y/N), she tilted her head. "Do you know, (Y/N)?"

The man in question blew a raspberry and shrugged. "Uh... Billy taught me how to do it once a long time ago. Something about gravity, pressure, and elevation. I was like fifteen. I didn't really get much of it but I think Joel was on the right track, actually."

"Exactly." Joel raised his brows at Ellie, almost sassily in fact, and turned his attention back to the tubes. Without having to look up at Ellie to see her expression, he spoke again. "No wondering."

Ellie clicked her tongue and tilted her head up toward the sky, lips pursing defiantly but her feet remained planted on the ground. (Y/N) couldn't help but smile, his eyes catching the wicked grin that sprung out on Ellie's face. She lowered her head and slipped her backpack off, placing her backpack on the hood of the next car with a soft thump. "This is your fault, then." Ellie laughed mischievously and tugged a book free from her backpack.

"Uh-oh." (Y/N) laughed, and then laughed again when Joel's face fell into disbelief and misery. Ellie proudly held No Pun Intended: Volume Too in her hands and loudly cleared her throat as she tossed the pages open. (Y/N) dug his teeth into his bottom lip, a few giggles escaping him as he awaited to hear stupidly cheesy puns and watch Joel's misery intensify.

"'It doesn't matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.' " (Y/N) snorted at Joel's silence. "No Pun Intended: Volume Too by Will Livington. Volume too, you get it? Too? Like, t-o-o?"

"Jesus." Joel exhaled heavily, staggering up onto his feet as giggles left Ellie.

"'What did the mermaid wear to her math class?'" Ellie looked up from the book at Joel, a slow grin spreading across her face. "'An algae bra!' Get it? Like algebra?"

It took another horrible pun and a burst of giggles for Joel to tell Ellie to wait in the truck while he finished getting gas. The satisfied look on her face and the mischievous smirk spoke volumes as she headed for the truck with a skip to her step. After a few more minutes, the canister was full with gas and the two men returned to the car. (Y/N) climbed back into the passenger seat, setting his rifle between his legs alongside his backpack, while Joel filled the gas tank and set the canister in the back. The truck rumbled to life and Joel drove them back out onto the road where lines of cars had been forced out onto the edges of the road.

"Must've been some truck," Ellie said, propped up on her knees to watch the cars they passed by.

"Yeah, they used to stick big-ass plows on 'em and clear the roads for their tanks and such," Joel explained grimly, glancing at the cars until the lines ended.

(Y/N) stared out into the vast emptiness around them, a stark difference from the forests he'd grown up around. He felt Ellie fiddling around in the backseat, searching around until she pulled out a cassette tape and had Joel insert it, an old country song pouring out from the speakers that (Y/N) vaguely recognized. Ellie continued her search and (Y/N) noticed her dip suddenly behind his seat, the sound of papers crinkling filling his ears.

"Got somethin' else. It's, uh, light on the reading, but it has some interesting pictures-"

"No, no, no. Put that back." Joel demanded and (Y/N) shifted in his seat, immediately spotting the athletically built shirtless model on the cover. His face immediately heated up and he turned back around, covering his mouth to stifle the embarrassed laughter that left him. "Ellie- Ellie, that is not for kids."

"Oh, my god. I didn't need to see that." (Y/N) whispered. "Throw that away, Ellie. It- It's not for your eyes-"

"Hold your horses! I wanna see what all the fuss is about!" Ellie laughed, continuing to flip through the pages. "Why are all these pages stuck together?"

"Ellie."

"I'm just fuckin' with ya." Ellie giggled, smacking Joel's shoulder with the magazine before lowering the window and tossing it out into the wind. She slumped back in her seat and rolled the window back up, more laughter escaping her lips until the sights they passed captured her attention.

They continued driving down the countryside, passing by a multitude of things. From a bison herd to an old overgrown rollercoaster, they drove until the countryside faded into lush forests and roads slowly overgrown with foliage that led to formerly populated areas. They stopped for gas one more time, listening to a few more puns from Ellie that had Joel contemplating his life and (Y/N) cracking up before hitting the road again. (Y/N) enjoyed looking out the window and imagining what the towns must've looked like before nature retook what was once hers. Of course, from time to time they'd pass old machinery where the army had attempted to fight back, whether against the infected or people, (Y/N) couldn't be sure but an uneasiness filled him whenever he spotted a tank or armored truck.

"Alright, that's enough for today," Joel murmured, turning the truck onto a grassy field and into a thick forest with tall trees where they'd be hidden away from anyone passing by. He parked the truck once satisfied with the spot and got out, collecting the small stove and setting it down on the ground while Ellie explored their camping spot for the night.

Stirring around the contents from a Chef Boyardee can, (Y/N) poured even servings into three plates and sat back against a mossy rock to eat. For an expired can of ravioli, it surprisingly still tasted good, though his thoughts drifted back to Bill's cooking. He pushed around the ravioli with his fork, idly listening to Ellie and Joel chat about their meal and plans. He couldn't help but think about them, about their last days spent together, about the short and sweet wedding. The urge to eat numbed quickly.

"Here, Ellie." (Y/N) murmured, scraping the remainder of his meal onto her plate and wiping his plate clean to use another time. (Y/N) stood up from the rock and tucked the plate and utensils away. He could feel Joel's stare burning a hole into his back and gave the man a smile to soften his worry. It hardly helped so (Y/N) focused on getting their sleeping bags out of the truck as the sky above them began to darken with night fast approaching.

With two lanterns, he sat one down between Ellie and Joel's sleeping bags and took the last one for himself. "I'll keep watch." He told them, slipping the rifle strap around his shoulder and patting Ellie's head as she lowered down to wiggle into her sleeping bag. She swatted playfully at his hand and chuckled, pulling the pun book and a flashlight out of her backpack before using it as a pillow. Joel glanced at him and stiffly nodded, settling into his own sleeping bag and watching him walk a few feet away.

(Y/N) leaned back against a tree trunk and set his lantern down by his feet, taking the strap off his shoulder and holding the rifle. His eyes trailed down the gun until they found the words engraved just above the trigger. B&F. His thumb ran over the rough letters, pressing into them until they left an imprint on his skin. He took a deep breath and raised his head, scanning the area around him. With everything falling into darkness, he was left to depend on his hearing for any sign of something amiss. But all he heard was the rustling of leaves above him and the occasional call of an owl. Fabric rustled behind him and the light from Ellie and Joel's lantern faded, leaving him with his thoughts while they dozed off into slumber.

About twenty minutes passed before he heard the fabric rustling again and peered over his shoulder to see Joel's dark figure getting up. Likely off to use the bathroom, he assumed and looked forward again, rubbing his thumb back and forth over the letters. His teeth nibbled lightly on his bottom lip and he could feel hunger slowly creep in, poking around as it made its presence known. A twig behind him snapped and he turned, finding Joel approaching him.

"You should be sleeping."

"And you should've eaten." Joel lifted his brows and took his wrist, placing two granola bars and an apple in his hand. He nodded to them and carefully took the gun from him, surveying the area in a glance before looking back at him. "Eat. I'll keep watch 'til you're done."

"Joel-"

"Eat." Joel urged gently, a surprisingly soft look falling over his features. "I have to take care of you, too, alright? Stop actin' stubborn and eat."

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brown-eyedblues · 11 months ago

Text

Long Lost Friends. Part 1

Billy the Kid x fem reader

A/N: Hey friends! This is the first time I’m writing for Billy! Actually, this is my first time writing in ages… I would really love to get back into it. This is going to be part one in this little universe, hopefully. I want to continue the current story, and also elaborate on y/n and Billy’s time as best friends back in Santa Fe. I just wanted to write a little intro to this story first. Please let me know what ya’ll think of this piece and give me some ideas for what else to write about next!

Warnings: None, really. Some kissing, some fluff. Light editing done.

Billy had arrived at Lincoln county, riding up to the gang’s camp earlier in the day. The hot sun was starting to set as Billy stood by the small fire, occasionally kicking loose twigs on the ground into the flames. His thoughts jolted to a stop when Jesse came up behind him, clapping him hard on the shoulder. They both ignored the cloud of dust and dirt that floated from the point of impact- Billy’s clothes desperately needed to be washed after riding on horseback from Chihuahua to Lincoln.

“Some of us are rollin’ out shortly to head to town, if you would like to join us.” Jesse said, taking a swig from a rusting flask.

“I don’t know, Jesse. I might just turn in early tonight, the ride from Chihuahua was a long one.” Billy sighed, twisting where he stood while his spine popped, as if punctuating what he had just said.

“That’s up to you, man, but I think you should come with us. There is someone at that saloon that I think you will want to see.” Jesse said, before shrugging his shoulders and shuffling over to the men that were already mounting their horses.

Billy’s interest was peaked, as much as he hated to admit it. He kicked over a pail of water that sat next to the fire, effectively snuffing it out. He jogged over to his horse, throwing one leg over its back and adjusting himself onto the saddle. Jesse tossed him a smirk before snapping his reins and kicking his horse into motion. Billy followed suit and shortly the group of men was cresting one of the green rolling hills on the outskirts of town. When the town came into view the group slowed down, and Jesse fell back until his horse was trotting alongside Billy’s.

“Jesse, who is at the saloon you want me to see so damn bad that it couldn’t wait until tomorrow?” Billy asked.

“You remember y/n? Back in Santa Fe?” Jesse asked, shooting Billy another knowing smirk. Of course Billy remembered y/n. She had been his best friend throughout the years he lived in Santa Fe. The last time he had seen her was a little over three years ago when his step-father had packed them up and moved them to Silver City. He thought of her often; wondering where she ended up, and if she was healthy and doing well. He frequently wondered if she had happened across his wanted posters, and recognized his likeness in the prints. “Looks like her family moved to Lincoln about a year after you left. Her parents have a farm just north of town. She works some nights at the saloon for some extra money,” Jesse continued. “And let me tell you something, Kid. She ain’t nothing like I remember her bein’. She sure has a fire in her.” He chuckled to himself, shaking his head.

Billy let the conversation fade after that. As the gang neared the town and the sound of laughter and music drifted through the hoof-worn dirt roads, Billy’s thoughts were racing. The last time he had seen y/n, she was standing on the bottom step of his home in Santa Fe, next to a horse drawn wagon that was packed with all of his family’s belongings. Tears streaked down her face as they said their final goodbyes. Standing on the step put her at eye level with him, and she sniffled softly as he looked down and kicked at that dirt at his feet. Without warning she had thrown her arms around his neck and kissed him hard on the lips, as if trying to meld herself to him. He held her against him for a moment, before easing her to a standing position in front of him. Without another word he had turned and hopped onto the back of the wagon, smacking the side of to tell his step-father he was ready. Billy had watched the girl he loved fade into the distance as the horses brought them further and further from Santa Fe.

At that point they had been sixteen, and y/n was just beginning to show signs of becoming a woman. Billy had been suppressing growing feelings for her, afraid that if he admitted to them, she wouldn’t reciprocate. Instead, he spent the hot days lounging in the sun with her, splashing in the local water hole, and running around the city together. Y/n often sat with him at poker tables, watching the game play out and chewing her nails- she never opted to play, claiming that the other players would be able to read her too easily. When Billy won (which only happened once in a blue moon), he would save half of his winnings for his family, and spend the other half at the local bookstore. He would spend his evenings sitting on the roof of y/n’s house. She would lay with her head in his lap, gazing at the stars and playing absentmindedly with Billy’s free hand, while he read softly to her. Billy often thinks that that is the last time he was truly happy.

Billy’s memories were interrupted when his horse halted suddenly. He looked around, and noticed the group had stopped outside of the saloon. The men dismounted and made for the door eagerly. Billy trailed behind, adjusting the hat on his head, tipping it so his eyes were hidden by shadows. He pushed through the swinging door, finding a wooden beam to lean against. His eyes swung slowly through the saloon, scanning faces as quickly as possible. He watched as Jesse strode up to a woman whose back was turned to him. She was wearing what appeared to be riding pants and a cream colored blouse, and a black apron tied around her waist. Billy held his breath as Jesse slapped both of his hands on the table she was currently wiping down. He leaned in towards her, a predatory smile on his face.

“Darlin’, I am about to make your night!” Jesse announced loudly, effectively quieting the room. Y/n propped her small fists on her hips, turning to Jesse with an exasperated look.

“Jess, the only way you could possibly make my night would be if you marched your cowboy ass out of this saloon and never came back.” Y/n sneered, causing the men gathering around to let out low whistles and laugh at her remark. Billy could see what Jesse was talking about when he mentioned y/n’s fire. He was a wellknown gang leader and gunslinger, not to mention he stood about eight inches taller than her, yet she stood with a straight back, and didn’t back down.

“What did I tell you Billy? See what I mean?” Jesse asked, turning his gaze to the outlaw who still leaned casually against the beam a few strides away. Y/n froze and the saloon was so quiet Billy could hear her sharp intake of breath.

After several heartbeats, y/n turned slowly, eyes scanning every person in the saloon. When her eyes settled on the man leaning against the beam near the front door, they lingered. The man wore a ragged hat, the brim of it shadowing most of his face. Her eyes trailed down to the gun belt that hung loosely around his hips. As her gaze rose again, the man lifted his arm, slowly removing the hat on his head and resting it against his chest. His sky blue eyes peered back at her. She wasn’t really sure how long they stood like that, silently watching each other. But when his lips pulled back to reveal a familiar smile, y/n felt her feet carrying her forward before she could even comprehend what she was doing.

Without a word, y/n quickly moved towards Billy. Choking back a sob, she leapt at him, throwing her harms around his neck. He caught her easily, dropping his hat to the floor. He guided her thighs to wrap around his waist, the same way he had the last time he saw her. After a few moments, she loosened her grasp around his neck, just enough to look into his eyes. This time, Billy was the one who leaned forward, his lips crashing into hers with a desperation that caused both of their cheeks to heat. Y/n was the first to pull away, but only after the hooting and hollering around them began to chisel through the bliss she felt. Billy carefully lowered her back down to the floor, his hands still caged around her waist.

“Billy Antrim, what are you doing here?” Y/n whispered, so only he could hear. It had been a long time since Billy had heard that name. He loved the sound of it on her tongue.

“Well, I came to Lincoln to help Jesse and the boys with a job,” He started, looking over her shoulder and scanning the saloon. “Would you like to take a walk with me?” He asked softly, swooping to pick up his hat and stepped away from y/n to swing the saloon door open, gesturing for her to walk through it to the cooling night ear.

Untying the apron and draping it on a hook by the door, y/n drifted past Billy, her hand coming up to ghost over his flushed cheek as she did so. He smiled to himself as he followed after her, letting the door slam behind him. He offered her his arm as they strolled down the road slowly, walking in such a way that their hips brushed each others gently. Billy looked down at y/n, and when she looked up at him, the soft moonlight reflecting in her gentle eyes, he vowed to himself he would never leave her again.

#billy the kid x reader #billy the kid #billy bonney x reader #Long Lost Friends #LLR #Autumn tries to write for Billy

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randomfoggytiger · 8 months ago

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Collector's Edition: Cars and Conversations (Part I)

Mulder and Scully have traveled a lot a lot a lot during their years in the basement-- surely, they had pretty cool conversations on the road?

Loose chronological order below~

@wexleresque/hellsteeth's

stars

As he climbs into the passenger seat of his father’s Lincoln, Fox yawns. The dashboard clock reads 5:03 AM and the smug tilt of his mother’s lips suggests that the early hour is the result of considerable negotiation. The tires crunch on the driveway and his mother waves at him absentmindedly from the porch as they depart. She doesn’t make a habit of smiling, but in the dark, Fox thinks something close might be on her face.

The drive is quiet this morning, save for the news on the radio and the whistle of the wind through the cracked window. Sunflower seeds sail over the glass and Fox takes a few out of the bag, chewing on them for something to do.

“How’s work, Dad?” he asks as they pass Fall River.

Young Mulder is tossed back and forth by his begrudging parents.

the fbi basement bulletin board - Chapter 5 (Tumblr)

“Hm. Well you probably don’t need a medical professional to tell you this, but if you keep moving it around, it’s going to take longer to heal. You need to rest it.”

“Noted, doc. And you just missed the turn, by the way.”

S1 Mulder is bad at directions-- especially with a sprained wrist.

Local Radio (Tumblr)

Driving out to a little town in Indiana hadn't been in the original plan, but the business of Memorial Day weekend had removed flying as an option. They needed to reach their destination within 24 hours. So here they were, en route to another place that didn't even warrant a dot on the map (you've seen one, you've seen them all, he sometimes thought to himself).

Mulder is amused at a crazy radio station (and at Scully's reaction.)

Christine Leigh's (Alt. Ao3) Maybe?

"Okay, here we are." Maggie said this as she pulled off the highway and onto the road that would take them into Democrat Hot Springs. She was surprised that there wasn't more traffic. This town, if she remembered right, was supposed to be some sort of a resort area. Five more minutes, and they were in the parking lot looking up at the familiar sight of the neon arches, and that's all that mattered.

Captain Scully is back from deployment; and Maggie senses something is off with her youngest daughter.

@thatfragilecapricorn30's (Ao3) Tell Me You Love Me - Chapter 1

“How do you know where I live?” he asked.

Scully’s cheeks reddened; she was hoping he wouldn’t notice or find her actions inappropriate. “It was, uh, it was in your personnel file. I wrote down your address after you called me at home after the last case. I figured I may need it at some point.”

Mulder smiled. “Just trying to see if you’ve been spying on me.”

Post Deep Throat Scully can't shed her keyed-up nerves after driving Mulder back home.

@scullywolf's (Ao3)

Eve

Her eyes narrowed. “How far up north?”

“California’s a big state, Scully.”

“I’m aware of that. How far?”

He decided there was probably something very interesting over in the corner that merited staring at while he answered. “About 300 miles. Give or take.”

Eve Mulder sheepishly wakes Scully.

Red Museum

Sure, the old man wasn’t a member of the church, and similarities between him and Brother Andrew were all but nonexistent, but the cryptic “There’s something I’d like to show you,” with no further explanation, was enough to set her mental warning bells chiming. She was a grown woman, with a gun, but that didn’t mean she loved the idea of jumping into some random stranger’s truck after only the briefest of exchanges. Mulder joined her at the truck’s window, an unspoken question on his face.

Red Museum Scully communicates her anxieties to Mulder without a word.

Demons

The car company rep agreed to come and pick her up, and she sat down on the curb for only a minute or so before getting up again to pace off her nervous energy. A hundred horrible scenarios played themselves out in her head; at least ninety of them involved Mulder getting into car wrecks of varying degrees of seriousness. In order to keep herself from panicking, she tried to focus on the task at hand, which only made her angry that she was even in her current position in the first place.

Demons Scully has to call in a new rental car.

Drive

“All I’m saying,” she said pointedly, “is that it could be worse. We could be crammed in a room right now with a bunch of other agents, and instead we’re at least driving around through what you have to admit is some fairly scenic farmland.”

Mulder spared a moment to mourn their lost office.

Drive Scully appreciates being out in the field with Mulder again.

Dreamland II

"...Mulder, I’m not proud of how long it took me to realize what was going on. I was about ready to drag you in for an MRI. Some sort of delayed-effect brain trauma from your trip out to the Queen Anne was the only thing I could think of to account for your dramatic change in behavior. Only it wasn’t you at all–”

“Well, you believe it now, and that’s all that matters. Now how do we fix things?”

Dreamland II Mulder and Scully catch up before heading back into the fray.

@cactustree's (Ao3) Fast Times and Slow Drives

She startles when she feels a warm hand on top of hers, and her eyes snap open as though jolted by an electric shock. She looks over to find Mulder studying her, his eyes darkened with concern.

“Watch the road, Mulder,” she murmurs, pulling her hand away from his.

“What’s wrong, Scully?”

Post Genderbender Mulder banters away Scully's apology with facts.

@h0ldthiscat's (Ao3, Alt. Ao3)

Survivor

She swats him away with one of her small hands when he touches her head and helps her into the car, but the look she shoots him lacks her usual antagonism, and the purse of her lips doesn't quite convince him that she's annoyed.

"Do you want another one of these before we hit the road?" He shakes a half-empty bottle of Gatorade at her as he slides behind the wheel, but she shakes her head once, firmly, and presses her lips together in a thin line, making them even whiter than they are.

Post Darkness Falls Mulder drives them home.

7. things you said while we were driving

She shoves the sunshade back up and clears her throat. “Can we go?”

He notices for the first time that her eyes are wet, that her chin is quivering despite her best attempts to control it. Remorse and guilt wash over him as he remembers an offhand comment from earlier in the week that explains her makeup, her nicer-than-usual suit, the set of her jaw.

Post Never Again Mulder's remorse soothes Scully's feelings.

Can I ask for a fic tonight? :)

“Was the drive okay?” she asks.

Mulder jerks his head back to the still open door and says, “Ask your son, he drove.”

William appears in the doorway, duffel bag slung over his shoulder, tawny hair in his eyes. “It was fine, Mom.”

“Good,” she says, shooting daggers at Mulder with her eyes, daggers that say she can’t believe he let their son drive in a snowstorm....

AU-- Revival era Scully is not pleased Mulder let college age William drive back in a snowstorm.

@crossedbeams’s (Ao3) I-Spy

‘I love this song!’ I explain, whizzing the twizzler I have pilfered from Mulder’s junk food haul around in some vaguely rhythmic pattern. I love music I just lack the skill set to express that love very elegantly.

Mulder chuckles at my enthusiasm and cranks up the volume, ‘I never would have had you pegged as a Clapton fan’.

S1 Scully tells Mulder about her family road trips.

@slippinmickeys's (Ao3, Gossamer)

Prompt Drabble Collection - Chapter 25 (Tumblr)

The thing was, it was next to impossible to see out the windshield.

Scully loved thunderstorms. Having spent a large portion of her youth in San Diego, they were still a novelty, even after years on other, more weather-prone bases and college campuses, and if she'd been home, she would have pulled up a chair next to her window and curled up there with a mug of tea, watching the light play in the sky and the water ping sharply against the glass.

However, as a driver she was cautious, and with Mulder, well, she had a reputation to uphold: He was the engine. She was the brake.

S1 Scully drives through a storm, donuts and a dozing partner included.

@brownies-and-tea/browniesandtea's Collect Call

“Mulder, it’s too late.” Scully sighed and leaned against the rain-streaked window of the car.

"I can't believe you're thinking fondly of that awful motel."

"I'm thinking fondly of a decent night's sleep." she stretched across the passenger seat.

S1 Mulder pursues a lead with Scully, from car to phone booth.

Ten's Learning to Breath (1/2)

In the elevator the women leaned him against one of the walls and kept talking to him, worried that otherwise he would go back to sleep and start sliding to the floor. Dana asked him questions, like his name and address, to keep him alert. She was relieved when she received the correct answers.

They got him into the backseat of Maggie's car, careful not to bump his head. Dana immediately raced around the car and got in the back herself. She fastened his seatbelt and watched as he leaned back against the headrest. He was asleep again before Maggie turned the key in the ignition.

AU-- Post One Breath Scully, Maggie, and Melissa are shocked at the state of Mulder's apartment.

J. C. Sun's Car Ride

My partner is next to me, as he always is, but for the first time in months, he's wearing his glasses. They make him look like an owl: a giant, somber six-foot owl perched in the driver's side seat. However, I doubt any owl has ever rolled his shirtsleeves up to the elbow and cradled a book in his lap, or chased the paranormal for a living. Nor do I think any owl has ever looked quite like him: the slightly twisted nose, the clear hazel eyes and the annoying, annoying little lock that, even now, droops across his forehead. It takes a wrench of will to resist the urge to reach out and to smooth it into place.

Post Firewalker Scully is bonded to Mulder now.

@seek-its-opposite/seek_its_opposite's

transient luminous events

He is still just standing there, the sleeves on the turtleneck he didn’t need to wear pushed up at the elbows. She is suddenly, vividly aware of the car, of the hot metal and the smell of rubber in stagnant humidity. Duane Barry’s trunk smelled like a spare tire. Her mouth goes cloth-gag dry.

“Can we?” she asks. She waves her hand at the road ahead and wonders how she’s so sure of this: He’d have known what she was asking even if she hadn’t.

“Sure,” Mulder nods. He looks relieved. He grabs their flashlights from the glove compartment and hands her one, and the flood of Pfaster’s headlights behind her eyes softens and clarifies into two beams that will never outrun her. And they walk.

Post Irresistible Scully confronts Mulder on his bubble-wrap method of protection.

if you weren't so

She tilts her chin up at him, at the usual angle, and finds that the geometry between them is the same.

“I need to talk to you,” she says. “Something’s happened.”

Behind him, his not-wife drags a recliner over the threshold in reverse, yelling at the houses that all look like hers.

“I have to talk to you alone.”

She says “alone” like she always says it and wonders if she meant to do that. There are days when she’s sure she could leave him in the dirt and still wind up in a room with him at the end of the world. As they slip behind the truck, she's gripped by the idea that to Joanne Fletcher, she is the woman Mulder shouldn’t be with.

AU-- Dreamland II Mulder and Scully try to find a way back to each other.

theramblinrose's Irresistible - Chapter 5/Chapter 6

“I didn’t know when I’d hear from you,” Mulder said.

“I’m at the airport,” Scully said. “I’ve got a car. I’m driving in. I just wanted to call before I left.”

“Anything wrong?” Mulder asked.

“No,” Scully said. “Honestly—everything’s feeling pretty right, Mulder.”

AU-- Irresistible Mulder and Scully are juggling their new relationship, a surprise pregnancy, and the fallout from the nefarious Pfaster.

eponine119's Same Old Fight

-Turn it back, he'd insisted, his knuckles white on the steering wheel with the effort of keeping the car on the narrow twisting road, This is making me jumpy.

-I don't know why I let you drive.

-You didn't have any choice.

-Mulder, pull over and let me drive.

-No.

S2 Mulder rescues Scully after their blowout fight almost ends with an explosive conclusion.

Sneakers/sneakers's

Walter Skinner's 'From Left Field

"But I don't see why Skinner should care about the book. It didn't mention *him*, and it didn't even use our names." Scully stood in front of the bookcase, scanning the shelves. "We didn't divulge anything classified; I'm sure the reading public thinks the whole think is a joke."

"But they had the nerve to claim I ate *twelve* piece of sweet potato pie!"

She pulled the book down. "Skinner's going to complain about your eating habits?"

"But I *hate* sweet potato pie, Scully. You know that, remember? I turned green at the gills last Thanksgiving, when your sister-in-law offered me some."

Post Jose Chung's From Outer Space Skinner has his thoughts on the book.

Sweet Home D.C.

"But the reception . . ." She looked out the window at the 1 AM darkness. "I think we both need to get some sleep. Turn the radio back on if you want to."

He did.

<< . . . Sweet home, Alabama . . . where skies are so blue . . . sweet home, Alabama . . . Lord, I'm coming home to you . . .>>

"That guy's got something wrong with his head, Scully."

Mulder and Scully, switching songs and swapping gum.

Evil_Little_Dog's

Cassadaga Bound

Dana squinted out the car window. "I don't think there's enough room in this town for all the witches, or demons, or devils in Florida, let alone the world."

S3 Mulder detours he and Scully to a fortune teller's.

Travelogue

“We’re not lost.” Mulder shot her a look then turned back to the road, correcting for the drift. “We’re directionally challenged.”

Making a guttural noise deep in her throat, Scully glanced out the window.

Mulder, the car, and a ditch.

@sunlightscully's (XF Writing Challenge - Food)

They have perfected the art of car eating. The driver orders and pays and hands the greasy bag over to be unpacked. The passenger unwraps the driver’s burger. They share fries.

When he pays she asks for the bare minimum and nothing too expensive. He orders extra large milkshakes and pretends he doesn’t see her stealing sips. They compensate for each other. Ketchup has not been spilled in years.

Mulder realizes he loves Scully.

Starbuck's (FFN) Wake Me When We Get There

"Shouldn't be much longer, Scully."

She made no acknowledgment, lying her head upon the seat once again. He continued driving as she drifted in and out of consciousness. White line. White line. Yellow line.

"Wake me when we get there, Mulder."

Mulder keeps the volume down so his partner can sleep on the long drive home.

@wtfmulder/@momdadimpoppunk's (Ao3) drabble; pay no mind

Scully paces around the car, branches and leaves snapping quietly under her weight. But she’s not angry, not at all, or nervous. She occasionally bends down to steal a sunflower seed from him and pauses to crack it before continuing her little loops.

Mulder and Scully find their own ways to entertain themselves when the rental car breaks down.

@incidental-ao3/incidental's Febuwhump 2023: The Truth is Out There (And the Fic is In Here) - Chapter 18

“No, Mulder, I should be keeping you awake, you’re the driver.”

“But I am awake,” he argued reasonably. “So there’s no reason for you to torture yourself when you could catch another few hours’ rest.”

“Don’t be dramatic, it’s not torture,” she scoffed. He smirked.

“Could’ve fooled me,” he said. She scowled sleepily.

Scully tries not to fall asleep, and Mulder ruminates on life before lights.

@mulderbabe77's Taco Stands and Regrets

He pushed down a little harder on the gas pedal.

“Are you gonna throw up?” He gulped, hoping to hear a no.

“Nope,” she answered and for a moment he almost sighed with relief. “The other thing, I think,” she finished, grimaced again and held a hand to her cramping stomach.

“I’m on it!” He sped the car up a little more.

Ten minutes later they could see the exit just ahead. Mulder was shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Mulder and Scully both get food poisoning while on the road.

@hamster-on-fire/fade_into_the_dusk_with_me’s For The Sake Of Driving (Ao3)

They’d do this sometimes. Drive. They were always driving, it seemed. But when it was dark like this & he was scared like this, or tired like this, or just utterly numb like this, it was different. The curve of the road up ahead could feel like a whole conversation; the silence, an opening, & they’d both sit there, like staring at a sterile wound.

Mulder and Scully help each other decompress on long, long car drives late into the night.

Timemeantnothing's On the road again

“We helped keep the Germans from getting Thor’s Hammer.”

“Mhmm,” Scully hummed, turning the corner.

“It was Einstein, Scully. We protected Albert Einstein.”

“That was very good of us to do.”

Mulder and Scully, driving: hot ladies, aliens, cheek kisses, Triangle rambles, and Millennium contentedness.

Thank you for reading~

Enjoy!

**Note**: I am a "separate the art from the artist" person through-and-through; but my lists will no longer be featuring writers that have blocked me-- tooooooo much drama has been kicked up over that issue.

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osiris-moon · 3 months ago

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When it got cold, he thought of Lincoln.

There were things colder than a freezer; that winter in Empire Bay when he came back from the war; icicles he would break off of porch steps to throw in front of cars when he was a kid; the lopsided snowmen he and his sister would hash together before dinner.

Yet all of that was a lifetime ago. Most days Vito was too busy to remember how the cold used to burn his lungs when he dared to take a deep breath.

He remembered being tied up and beaten in that freezer. Even his white-hot rage couldn't stop his fingers from going numb. He wasn't as young and spry as he used to be, he couldn't take on a dozen men and walk out with a cigarette hanging from his lip.

He thought he was going to die there, beaten, humiliated, and worth nothing. His temper made him swear and fight, but all his efforts were for nothing. He was finished.

Then came Lincoln Clay, a damned behemoth of a man taking up the whole doorway with a knife in his hand. The place was silent after a hailstorm of bullets; Grecco’s men most likely laid in heaps on the floor courtesy of Lincoln.

Vito knew he hadn't croaked yet because his ass wasn't being burned by hellfire. Still, seeing a man who was supposed to be dead walking towards him really was something.

He'd met the kid once, but he wasn't someone Vito was able to forget so easily.

Whenever the air turned chilly, Vito would think about the halo of light silhouetting Lincoln in the doorway. Lincoln's knife, warm with fresh blood, cut him loose. He stood close enough that Vito instinctively leaned into the source of heat.

It was a shame that every time he got cold, Lincoln wasn't around to chase it away. Vito scoffed at the thought, careful to keep the cigarette between his teeth as he shut the door behind him.

#random half baked thing that popped into my head #been so lincvito pilled lately #lincoln/vito #mafia 3 #mafia trilogy #fic #kind of #vito scaletta #lincoln clay

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newstarsongs · 1 year ago

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assigning dndads characters kimya dawson songs because I am crazy!!!

Henry oak: Nobody's Hippie, I Like Giants , Tire Swing

Glenn Close: Underground, Loose Lips, The Beer

Darryl Wilson: I Love You Sweet Baby (sorry im crazy), I'm Fine (darryl was REALLYY hard sorry if these arent good lol)

Ron Stampler: Happy Home (Keep On Writing), My Mom

Normal Oak: The Competition, My Rollercoaster, Nothing Came Out (this song is moldy peaches but shh)

Taylor Swift: Blue Like Nevermind, Singing Machine

Lincoln Li-Wilson: Time To Think (kindaa??), Hadlock Padlock (linc was also really hard sorry!!)

Scary Marlowe: My Heroes, Being Cool

Hermie Unworthy: So Nice So Smart (come on guys, this was obvious), Everythings Alright

#also if you want any reasons why i think certain songs fit certain chraracters pls tell me i will happily give them..#if you have suggestions for other kimya songs that fit other dndads characters PLS TELL ME!!#dungeons and daddies #dndads #henry oak #darryl wilson #glenn close #ron stampler #normal oak #taylor swift (not that one)#lincoln li wilson #scary marlowe #hermie unworthy #rj talks

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lookalikeds · 7 months ago

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estrella soto is a twenty five year-old figure skater in new york, u.s.a. they were brought under richard’s care when they were only five years old. they are known as the lookalike because they are lithesome but also disillusioned.

𓂅 * ⋆ BASICS .

FULL NAME. estrella luciana soto. MEANING. spanish , “ star. ” NICKNAMES. ella , ellie , este , ells , she accepts any and all variations. AGE. twenty five. BIRTHDATE. seventh of march in the year nineteen eighty. PLACE OF BIRTH. tuscon , arizona. WESTERN ZODIAC. pisces. GENDER IDENTITY. cis woman , she & her. ORIENTATION. demisexual , biromantic. NATIONALITY. american. SPOKEN LANGUAGES. english and spanish. OCCUPATION. professional figure skater. CURRENT RESIDENCE. an apartment in greenwich village , nyc that she shares with her occasional skate partner turned roommate turned situationship , brando(n).

𓂅 * ⋆ PHYSICAL .

HEIGHT. five foot , one inch. BUILD. petite , fit , lithe - particularly on an ice rink. FACE CLAIM. jenna ortega. HAIR. dark brown , an almost black that reaches below her shoulders with curtain bangs to frame her face. generally worn in loose curls and half up , half down styles that can be easily pinned up for skating. EYES. big , round and warm brown… in a word , doe-like. NOTABLE FEATURES. aforementioned doe-eyes , various scrapes and bruises from missteps on the ice , long lashes and a dark scattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks. SCENT. wild strawberry , pink jasmine , patchouli and amber , reminiscent of miss dior cherie. TATTOOS. a little butterfly on her left shoulder blade. PIERCINGS. two lobe piercings on each ear in addition to an orbital on her right. DOMINANT HAND. ambidextrous but favours her right.

𓂅 * ⋆ PSYCHE .

MYERS - BRIGGS. enfj-t , the protagonist. MORAL ALIGNMENT. neutral good. TRAITS. balletic , disillusioned , driven , guarded , haunted , independent , keen , resilient , rueful , tender. QUIRKS. remarkably flexible , she bites her lip in thought , toys with jewellery when uncomfortable , never fails to keep a neat manicure and rests in stances one might recognise to be ballet positions. VICES. a true workaholic , she maintains a very healthy lifestyle but does occasionally drink and smoke socially.

𓂅 * ⋆ INTERESTS & HOBBIES .

INTERESTS. choreography and dance , theatre of every variety - lincoln centre is a favourite of hers for their opera & ballet seasons , classical music and most recently , the cold case of winifred woodrow. HOBBIES. fitness , theatregoing , cabaret club nights and uploading free dance skating routines onto ( a newly launched ) youtube - brando choreographs and then they perform them together for funsies. SPECIAL SKILLS. an accomplished dancer who still practises ballet to this day , remarkably high endurance and muscle memory due to her training and profession , uncanny ability to internalise her feelings.

𓂅 * ⋆ BECOMING A WARD .

tw : teenage pregnancy, child abandonment and implied endangerment.

it became a regional news story. statewide, people seemingly fascinated by how any parent could dream of abandoning their child, let alone in such a callous fashion.

estrella had only recently turned five when her not-much-older-than-teenage parents dropped her off at kindergarten one morning only to fail in picking her up again later that day. try as teachers and later, police sergeants might, there was no getting ahold of them. with little known and much speculated, many would soon arrive at the conclusion that the young couple had fled the country to start anew, leaving behind the small daughter they’d come to look upon as an unwanted burden.

one such person, who took immense pity on the girl, was a connection richard held at the newly-launched CNN. an attentive news reporter by the name of julian esparza was keenly aware of the philanthropist’s efforts to offer up his home to young individuals in need of safety and stability and recommended richard meet with little estrella as soon as he could. whatever it was that richard saw in the five year old girl that day ( likely the spirit and semblance of his long lost daughter ) caused the man’s heart to bleed and within a week the paperwork had been signed and estrella was on the way to her new home.

𓂅 * ⋆ LIFE AS A WARD .

being not only one of the earliest wards to arrive but also the very youngest of them all, estrella’s status as baby sister of the house never really strayed from the stereotypes. spoiled and resilient, she was a paradox amongst the wards in how she seemed to possess the least agency but carry the highest status.

it’s a unique sense of imposter syndrome, she summises — bearing the unfathomable weight of another’s lost girlhood. cursed princess with her whole life ahead of her, she was a little girl walking so unknowingly into the tall shadow of the daughter who’d come before. from the very beginning, richard had never been particularly shy in how he doted on young estrella. freely showering her in the paternal affection the past had robbed them both of and to a little girl who’d been abandoned by her own parents, being made to feel so wanted was all she could have dreamt of. he was her father in all but name.

outwardly, she was a precocious and spirited young girl, all pink cheeks and toothy grins, perpetually in awe of those she shared a home with, their varied and abundant talents drawing her wide-eyed wonder. until she took to the ice for the first time, you’d see her following fellow wards around, hoping to catch a glimpse of whatever it was they were up to before being told she was too young or too small and relegated to sitting on the sidelines. it was a pattern of behaviour that, although adapted, would follow her until she left woodrow.

for try as she might, amidst the attention from richard she so enjoyed, the wards did not warm to estrella the way she hoped they would. their caretaker’s favouritism for the surrogate daughter he’d found in estrella had planted the seed of resentment and in turn, stifled and isolated her entirely. it was in this eventual seclusion that she learnt the value of independence and began throwing herself into skating completely, suddenly glad for the chance to thrive all on her own the way she’d watched the other wards do.

she grew reticent, internalising all she felt for the sake of whatever semblance of a family she still wanted to cling to. the same would eventually be said of the response estrella had to an equally crushing realisation… that she’d never quite compare to a dead girl.

the rosy retrospection of childhood had begun to fade. estrella can’t ever pinpoint a specific moment in which things changed for them but gradually, over time, when she would come to meet richard’s eye… her heart sank. in the midst of reminiscing, she could feel he wasn’t looking back at her at all but rather at winifred… or whatever semblance of his daughter he’d long been projecting onto estrella. it was an all too painful revelation, one that haunted her from that point on.

more than anything, estrella wanted to escape her own skin. flee from any part of herself tied to the woodrow daughter who had so mysteriously disappeared that bleak midwinter night. this striking resemblance that had changed her life and been the cause of all her woe. had anyone accepted her for who she truly was?

despite the fierce independence she’d adopted, estrella still found herself clinging to the father she’d once known him to be. looking on in rumination, she’d wonder ( at length ) if his love for her was at all genuine… never once risking the inevitable confrontation out of fear for the loss that would follow. instead, keeping it bottled up once again. distancing herself little by little until she was out and away in the world — determined to be known as more than ‘the substitute daughter’, ‘the favourite’ or ‘the lookalike.’ her own person, at last.

although she was never too far away… and when richard called, she could do nothing else but gladly answer.

𓂅 * ⋆ AESTHETIC .

distinctly feminine, very gabriella from high school musical core with her wrap cardigans and ballet flats. though as an athlete, she’s an athleisure girly through and through. leotards, leggings, matching sets. day-to-day, she really favours layers that she can easily take off and put back on during training. the odd tracksuit here and there. even if it’s warm outside, you’d usually see her with a puffer jacket on hand because the rink is so cold. on more formal occasions, she opts for mini dresses and heels to help give the illusion she’s taller ( weeps in 5’1” ) and accessorizes with a sweet bow or two in her hair.

you’ll always see her wearing her charm bracelet however. it was a present from richard when estrella first joined her skate club and each time she’d compete, he’d add a charm. they’re all stars, in honour of her name.

𓂅 * ⋆ EDUCATION .

estrella was homeschooled throughout all her time at woodrow. as figure skating became more and more of a serious pursuit, it seemed easier to contain her schooling to the house. less distractions that way. her coach was certainly in favour of it. perhaps it was the people pleaser in her, the ‘perfect daughter’ of it all but she also maintained straight a’s too. it came as no surprise when she applied to richard’s alma mater of kingsbury college and got in on a skating scholarship. the real twist being that she soon deferred in order to commit to her sport full time and has yet to return to kingsbury to finish said degree.

𓂅 * ⋆ EXTRACURRICULARS .

figure skating, also known as her entire world. estrella had been a baby ballerina prior to being taken into richard’s care and he quickly accommodated for that love of hers with a continuation in lessons. however by the second winter she spent at woodrow house, he was soon introducing her to the frozen pond on the grounds and she took to skating it like a duck to water.

other pursuits include literature, musical theatre and classical music. their occasional outings as a ‘family’ to see operas and ballets very much inspired her.

𓂅 * ⋆ THEIR LIFE NOW .

estrella only left woodrow house three years ago and even then, living in-state meant she was still a fairly regular visitor. she’d moved into the city in order to be closer to her skating club, other rinks she frequented and transport for national and international competitions. being only a three hour drive away however, meant most national holidays were spent there at richard’s side, the odd special occasion and long weekend too.

in nyc, she shares a modest apartment with brandon, better known as brando. they used to skate together at the same club before he recently retired to pursue choreography at a nearby dance studio. there’s always been lingering romantic tension there but most of all, he’s her biggest cheerleader and a helpful objective party regarding all things woodrow.

all the while, estrella’s been forging her own destiny. she’s been competing internationally at the top of her discipline for years at this point. ( a writing guide on figure skaters advised not to go into specifics about competitions bc it’s a lot so, i won’t but let’s just say she’s a pretty decorated athlete and represented team usa at the 2002 winter olympics in salt lake city and was in the midst of training for the 2006 games before richard’s death. ) what she loves most of all though is getting to step out as herself. on the ice, the only narrative being spun is the one she creates. it’s a level of control she enjoys ( and dreads giving up upon her return to woodrow house. ) whilst she came to woodrow house seeking a family, she left seeking visibility and acceptance and in skating, estrella truly found that.

#wrhq.intro #it’s been 84 years #might add a graphic at a later date but i just wanted it out!!

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mywifeymax · 5 months ago

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Who would have thought---🌲💌(Bellamy x Femreader) Part 6

Warning (Smut ahead ⚠️ 18+)

(Y/n pov)

*Waking up by a startled I made my way to the dropship and I found Murphy there I felt anger rush up inside me and I walked over to him* "What the hell are you doing here?"I asked "look they're letting me stay here until I'm better then I'll leave again"He said it wasn't the same Murphy from before he looked almost deadly sick

*I sighed and dapped his face with a wet wash cloth and I kept doing it until Clarke got there* "I'll take over"She said "Okay I'll leave to get him some water"I said *She nodded and I got up and walked out of the drop ship to the water bowl in the tent and scooped up some water using a metal cup and I walked back inside to Murphy and sat down next to him and brought the cup up to his lips and I let him drink it slowly*

-------

*A few hours later I walked in to see Raven setting up the radio to get a hold of the ark* "How it going?"I asked "Very slowly"Raven said *I nodded and then she looked up at me* "You're face"Raven said*I looked confused until I felt something warm drip down my cheek*it was blood "Raven stay back"I said

*Leaving the tent I quickly made my way into the dropship and I saw a few people who are also sick there and I sighed and then I saw Bellamy rush in* "I heard you were sick?"Bellamy said "I am so stay back"I said "Did he do something to you?"Bellamy asked "No bell just stay back you can't get sick"I said *I looked at him as he looked at me with a state of panick and worry and then I saw a guy cough up his on blood and then stop moving and Clarke then check him* "He's dead"She said

"who all touched Murphy?"Bellamy asked "I think Octavia did"Will said *I watched as Bellamy left the dropship and I went over to the Conor and at down*

-----

*waking up I heard Bellamy call out and I came out* "Hey"I said "God you look worse then ever"Bellamy said "You really know you're way around girls"I joked Bellamy let out a soft chuckle "Can I do anything for you?"He asked "Maybe some extra water and food"I said "I see what I can do"He said "Is Octavia in there"He asked "She should be"I said weakly "Octavia"He called out *Clarke came out* "She not here I sent her to talk to Lincoln"Clarke said "You sent her to a fucking grounder"Bellamy said angrily "We need to find out if there's a cure"Clarke said *As I felt dizziness raise back up inside me and I feel my legs give out on me and I felt like I was caught and picked up and I looked up to see Bellamy holding me* "You shouldn't be touching me"I said weakly "Let's get you inside"Bellamy said "Don't worry we'll get the cure soon"Clarke said

"There is no cure"Octavia said "What do you mean?"Bellamy said "There is no cure and they are setting an attack at dawn"Octavia said

*Getting carried inside Murphy gave up his spot for me to lay in as Bellamy layed me down* "I have to help with the war"I said "You have to worry about getting better first and stay alive for me alright I can't loose you"Bellamy said *I nodded slowly*"Good"Bellamy said

----

*Waking up to the sudden movement in the dropship I saw them bring in Bellamy quickly getting up I walked over to him* "Bell"I said "Hey"He said weakly*Dapping his skin with a wash cloth* "it's okay I got you"I said "I'm scared"He mumbled "We'll make it through it I promise"I said taking ahold of his hand "I'm not leaving"I said

*I felt as he pulled me into his arms as he kept his arms around he fell asleep and I stayed awake to make sure he didn't choke on his own blood I kept my eyes on him the whole time* it hurts seeing bellamy like this he didn't deserve this sickness or to even be down here with us where is nothing but a nightmare everyday

-----

*A few hours later we all got up as we went outside and saw smoke in the air* "She did it she really did it"Bellamy said *I felt Bellamy wrap his arm around me and pull me into him* "I knew she could"I said

*I watched as the night taken over as we all drinked and party but I stayed close to Bellamy* "You know you deserve a drink"Bellamy said "You deserve one as well"I said *I smiled as he smiled* "You know we deserve something better than alcohol"Bellamy said "Oh yeah like what?"I said *I watched as he licked his bottom lip and wink at me I then realize what he was trying to say* "I think you might be right"I said agreeing "Meet me in my tent"Bellamy said *I watched as he walked off*

Was I really about to have sex with Bellamy Blake *I smile and bit my lip before walking over to his tent and went inside and I saw him there and he just stared at me as he walked over to me and kissed me and I kissed him back*

*I helped him remove my shirt as I remove his as well* "God you're so beautiful"Bellamy said *I smiled as I leaned back in to kiss Bellamy as he reach behind and unclipped my bra and threw it on the floor and he kissed down my neck I let out soft moans at the feeling* his kisses felt like electricity against my skin *I felt as he kissed down my collar bone and kisses my breasts and sucked on it I let out a soft moan as I ran my fingers through his hair he then kissed down my stomach and made his way to my jeans and he unbutton them before taking them off and he kissed my inner thigh*

"Bellamy please I need you"I begged out "You're so pretty when you beg baby"Bellamy said *I watched as he took off his pants and slide down my underwear throwing it to wherever my bra was as he took off his boxers and he lined himself up with my entrance* "Are you ready?"He asked *I nodded and bit my lip as he slowly enter inside of me I gasp out* "Bellamy"I moaned out*He leaned down as he kissed my lips* "Good girl"He said *I moaned out as he begin to thrust into me I moan out his name over and over again* "Just like that baby keep moaning my name like that"Bellamy whispered in my ear *I moan as he grunted* "Fuck so tight"Bellamy groaned

*I kept moaning and then I flip us over as I was now on top of Bellamy and I moved my hips to move faster as I kissed Bellamy and I moaned against his lips* "Fuck so good"Bellamy said *I felt as he thrust up into me* "So fucking good"Bellamy groaned*I move my hips faster to match his thrusts and I threw my head back moaning as I felt a pressure in my stomach as I felt a knot* "I'm gonna cum"I moaned out "Cum for me baby"Bellamy said as he thrust into me faster*I moaned out as my vision blurred over as released* "Just like that pretty girl "Bellamy groaned *I kept moving my hips as bellamy groaned out and released his load inside of me and I kept moving my hips to ride out his high*

*feel Bellamy pull out I layed in his arms as we both catch our breaths* "That was amazing"Bellamy said "Yeah it really was"I said "I'm going to be honest I don't want that just to be one really good hook up y/n I care about you Alot and I would do anything to make sure you're okay I want you to be mine"Bellamy said* *I felt my heart pump in my chest* "I want to be your's Bellamy"I said "Good so then you're mine"Bellamy said

-To be continued-

#bellamy blake x reader #romance #fanfic #the 100 #love

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linkysmommy · 1 year ago

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He Would Have Won

This fic was written for @abelflints for the Choices 2023 gift exchange organized by @oh-so-youre-a-nerd!

WARNING: Extreme angst lies ahead, ye be warned!

Fandom: It Lives Pairing: Lincoln x MC Word Count: 6957 Concept: What if Matthias succeeded in killing MC and made them into his anchor?

If you prefer Ao3, you can find the fic HERE.

The playlist accompanying the gift can be found HERE.

Tagging: @choicesficwriterscreations

***

He would have won.

If he hadn’t gone stupid and fallen in love, then he wouldn’t have panicked when he saw that gray-faced horror tear her teeth into Lincoln’s shoulder. He would have been able to turn away from the pooling blood that dribbled down Lincoln’s arm and focus on his fight. He wouldn’t have abandoned everything he was doing to get to Lincoln’s side, now, before it was too late and he bled out and this reason for living was gone.

But he had fallen in love, and he did panic when he saw Lincoln get bitten. He didn’t turn away from the sight of blood against gray fabric—he moved toward it. Mouth, frozen in a scream; hand, outstretched. He ran for Lincoln, he ripped the horror off of him, he threw her to the ground—

“Are you alright Lincoln?”

But he was no longer watching his back.

“Vax, behind you!”

Lincoln’s warning came too late. Vax’s breath hitched as a searing pain tore through his entire core. He looked down. A bloodstained knife protruded from his chest.

His mouth tasted like iron. His vision began to spin.

“No, Vax… no…”

Vax’s knees buckled, but Lincoln caught him before he hit the ground.

“No no no no no…”

Vax lifted a weary hand to Lincoln’s face. Speaking was difficult, but he managed to say, “Your— shoulder—”

Tears brimmed Lincoln’s eyes. “My shoulder is fine, don’t worry about my shoulder.”

Vaz coughed specks of blood. “Be— okay—”

Then Matthias was grabbing him, dragging him to the altar— Lincoln was being held back by Matthias’s minions— he was on his knees, begging his father to please stop this, to give Vax back to him—

And then… that was that. Matthias won. Vax was dead.

He would have won, if only he hadn’t fallen in love.

But he did. He’d never say it, of course, but anyone who knew him knew that’s what it was. It manifested by the way he worried over Lincoln’s shoulder, even as he was dying, or the way that he was always aware of what Lincoln needed and did all in his power to meet those needs.

Maybe it was this love—so endless and monumental—that led to what happened next, or maybe it would have happened in any world where Vax became Matthias’s anchor. But the facts were this: Vax was only sort of dead, and anyone who’d ever known him in any way, knew it.

***

(continued under the cut)

The sun had barely risen, its warm reds, yellows, and pinks glinting off the crystalline ocean surface, when the man sensed it: a presence, distant and altered, but unmistakable all the same.

He rose from where he lay in his bed, draped between two other sleeping bodies, and crossed the lavish room to stare across the beach and into the tranquil waves—to stare west. As he did, it appeared once more, a pulse in his chest, a tugging, a thrashing, violent and raw and furious.

A slight smile tugged at his lips. “I was wondering how long it would take you to awaken.”

The sheets behind him rustled as the man and woman with whom he had shared his bed began to groggily awaken. They were nothing, really, just some playthings to pass the time with, but in this moment they were interrupting something important. Something sacred.

“Are you alright?” called the woman.

Matthias turned to them, a cruel glint in his ice blue eyes. “Leave me.”

“But—”

“Now. Before I lose my patience.”

They knew nothing of who he had been, without the slightest idea of the power he held. But at the edge in his voice, they both obediently rose to their feet, their silken robes loose against their skin, and darted from the room.

Matthias was alone once more. Or was he?

He stepped toward the window and pressed his palm against the glass. “Try to wake up,” he taunted as the waves crashed against the beach. A distant sense of anger from a source so very far away crept into the air around Matthias.

All it managed to do was make him smirk. “You always were so very angry, weren’t you? I suppose that’s something that you and my son had in common.”

The curtains fluttered, though the windows were closed and no fans were turned on. Matthias chuckled to himself Even from the other side of the world, Vax’s power could still reach him. Yes, he had chosen his anchor very well, indeed.

***

The start of a new consciousness isn’t a sudden thing. It’s not like turning on the lights or opening your eyes, it isn’t darkness to brightness in an instant. No, it’s more like a sunrise; subtle rays of light dimly glimmering to life in the darkness until the entire sky gleams brilliantly from the sun.

And so it was no different for the sentience trapped deep beneath the earth in the mountains outside of Westchester—aside from the pain.

It started out as a dull throb, but the stronger the awareness grew, the stronger it became. It grew and grew, little by little, until the pain was blinding and all-consuming, a constant torrent of agony centered around one single point: the knife protruding from a heart that was no longer his. He was everywhere, and he was nowhere. He was looking down at himself in a pool of water—at the mess of his rotting, tattered clothes and dissolving, decomposed skin—and he was inside himself, looking up at a vortex of spiraling cyan.

Through the spinning confusion, only two things were clear: pain was everywhere, and his rage was burning hot.

Try to wake up…

The taunting words were distant, as if worlds away, but they struck him to the core. Fiery wrath exploded from within him and the cavernous chamber filled with cyan flames.

Y… o… u… the sentience thought. I… will… fi… nd… you…

His anger leaked out from the bottomless pit that was his existence, staining the air around him and shooting out in all directions. He was angry, he was alone, he was in pain, he wanted the world to burn, he wanted to hurt everyone the way he had been hurt—

Vax…?

A softer voice, a gentle presence, reached him, pulling all his attention for the briefest of moments before cutting through the fire within him and soothing him all the way down to his core. The anger dissipated until the only thing left was pain and the echo of a memory of having once loved…

***

Lincoln awoke to a gasp and an aching heart, the name of his fallen lover hiding in his lips.

The windows were streaked with rain, and gentle pattering sounded against the roof of his apartment bedroom. He sat up in bed, his loose hair hanging in his eyes, and took deep, calming breaths. The room was calm and dark, peaceful even. But he couldn’t shake off the feeling that something was truly, deeply wrong.

His dream… Vax had been in it, hadn’t he? Lincoln could only remember vague details—something about being angry, perhaps? and pain, too—but he had the sense that his dream had both been very real, and very important.

He reached for his nightstand and blindly fumbled in the darkness for his phone. He wanted to listen to the voicemail Vax had left him, a voicemail that he kept even now, more than a year after Vax had passed. It never failed to offer him comfort and warmth whenever he felt overwhelmed. But before he could grab it, it started to buzz, the screen lighting up and casting a soft glow across the room. His brow furrowed.

Who the hell is calling me in the middle of the night?

Lincoln grabbed the phone and squinted, his eyes adjusting to the light as he read the name: Abel Flint. He stifled a yawn, then answered the phone. Before he even had the speaker against his ear, he heard Abel’s frantic voice on the other end, growing louder the closer the phone got to his face.

“—need to know if you’re alright!” Abel was saying, his normally deep voice now higher and panicked.

Lincoln grunted. “The hell are you talkin’ about, Flint?”

Abel paused. “So you’re okay?”

“I’m about to be less okay if you keep blabbering like that. I was asleep”—Lincoln broke himself off with a yawn, only continuing once it had passed—“and you’re calling me at… 5:30 in the morning.”

Lightning flashed outside, briefly illuminating his sparsely decorated bedroom. On the other end of the line, Abel let out a relieved sigh.

“Thank god.”

Lincoln leaned back against the bed frame, the phone tucked against his shoulder. “Why? Were you expecting me to not be okay?”

“I guess you wouldn’t have heard about it if you were asleep.” Abel takes a breath, then says, “There was a pretty big earthquake in Las Vegas just a few minutes ago. If you turn on the news—”

Lincoln didn’t wait for him to finish. He was already running out to the living area of his apartment and turning on the TV. It immediately flipped onto the news channel, where the words BREAKING NEWS slowly scrolled across the bottom of the screen. The video displayed horrific destruction that made his breath catch: leveled houses, fractured streets, flattened businesses.

“I was worried something had happened to you,” Abel said quietly, pulling Lincoln’s attention away from the screen.

“No, I—I’m good.”

But he was rattled. That building there on the TV—he was certain it was a shopping mall he had visited just last week to shop for new clothes. One moment, everything had been calm and quiet, and the next, it was shaken with destruction. Snippets of his dream came back to him—fleeting recollections of the furious anger, and pain—and something inside of him felt that this destruction was somehow related to the feelings of that dream. It wasn’t without the realm of possibility, not with Lincoln’s connection to the Power.

“Are you going to be okay?” Abel asked. “Things look… pretty bad, Linc.”

“Yeah, they do.” And then, before he could stop the words from coming out of his mouth, he said, “You’re in Westchester right now for Mercedes’ birthday aren’t you? Maybe I’ll come visit for the next few days. Just until things calm down here.”

If Abel was surprised by Lincoln’s sudden willingness to return to Westchester, he didn’t show it. He just said, “Yeah. I think that’d be a good idea.”

They chatted a while longer about light things, like Lincoln’s clients at the tattoo shop and how Abel’s siblings were doing and then hung up. By then, early morning light was spilling between the cracks of the curtains blocking Lincoln’s windows. Slowly, uncertainly, he crept toward them, and drew the curtains back.

He gasped at the sight.

The sky was covered in a dusty gray smog from the aftermath of the earthquake, and even just down the street he could see signs of the destruction: palm trees were split in half and lying in heaps on the ground, cars were totaled, and the driveway of a nearby house was cracked in two.

“What could have caused this…” he muttered to himself.

And then, as if in answer to his question, one word came floating unbidden to his mind: Vax.

Lincoln fell back from the window, his heart racing. That made no sense. How could Vax be responsible for any of this? He was dead, gone, and even when he was alive, he never could’ve caused destruction such as this. But then a feeling washed over him—familiar in its cool aloofness and fiery loyalty. It was the feeling of Vax’s aura, an aura that Lincoln had never felt anywhere except for at Vax’s side.

Perhaps that was the reason he’d volunteered so readily to visit Abel. Not to get away from the destruction in Vegas, but to be closer to Vax, to uncover if this earthquake had any ties to the life force being preyed upon deep within the Westchester caves.

Whatever the reason, Lincoln dropped the curtains and turned back to his bedroom. If he wanted to get to Westchester before dark tonight, he needed to start preparing for the trip.

***

The sun was warm against Lincoln’s face as he stepped out of his hotel located on Westchester Main Street the following morning. He’d arrived from Vegas late the night before, and he still wasn’t sure why. There was no other place that he hated more than this town and all its ghosts, and yet here he was. Drawn in by something that he could barely understand and explain even less.

He may have been using the excuse of the earthquake, but the fact that he knew Abel was here for the next month, visiting friends and family, made it easier for him to come. There was Connor, Devon, and Noah, but their time together had barely been over a month, and despite Connor’s attempts to reach out, Lincoln hadn’t been the best at staying in touch.

There was Jocelyn, too… but Lincoln had barely spoken to her since the memorial. He knew he shouldn’t blame her—his father had spent nearly three centuries mastering the art of manipulation and she was such an easy target—but that didn’t stop the questions from plaguing his mind. If Jocelyn had told them about her deception sooner, what would they have done differently? Would they have uncovered the full extent of Matthias’s treachery?

Would Vax still be alive?

He shook away the thought as he climbed onto his motorcycle and drove the short distance to Westchester’s favorite diner. Abel was already there when he arrived, of course, long legs tucked under a corner table with a mug of coffee in one hand and a tattered old book in the other.

He looked up as Lincoln entered, and his face lit up. Lincoln waved, quickly ordered his food, and then joined Abel at the table. Before allowing him to sit, Abel insisted on a hug, which Lincoln grumpily accepted.

“It’s good to see you again, Linc,” Abel said as he took his seat once more. His trademark grin was stretched across his face, as if sitting in this breakfast cafe with Lincoln was the best thing that could’ve happened to him.

“Good to see you too, Flint.” Lincoln set his coffee on the tabletop—an americano with a few drops of honey and a hint of cinnamon—and slid into the chair across from Abel. The chair was made of uncomfortable black metal, and the legs were uneven lengths, making it wobble back and forth with the slightest shifts under Lincoln’s weight.

“I’m so glad you decided to come,” Abel said, his cup halfway to his lips. He took a sip, then continued, “Mercedes will be thrilled that you’re here for her birthday. She still mentions at least once a week to me how happy she is that we’ve made up, and she’s constantly begging me to have you over while she’s here so she can see you again.”

Lincoln raised an eyebrow. “...Why?”

“She missed you, Linc! We used to do such fun things with my siblings. Blanket forts, Mario Kart tournaments—”

“Blow up pools in the backyard, horror stories in the attic—yeah, I remember,” Lincoln said, a smile stretching across his face. “I guess I did spend quite a bit of time with them when we were younger. It’ll be good to see them again.”

Conversation came easily between the two men as they chatted over their coffees and pastries. Many other patrons came and went, but Lincoln and Abel stayed. First it was an hour, and then it was two hours, and they were still there, chatting about their lives and their friends. They talked about Amalia’s successful application to law school, and Jocelyn’s upcoming graduation, and Lila and Dan’s engagement, and Connor’s new auto body shop. They talked about all the things that had happened in the near decade that they’d spent estranged from one another: about Abel’s few relationships and Lincoln’s many flings, about Lincoln’s tattoo mentor who had grown to be like a father and Abel’s professor who had never stopped encouraging him from pursuing a PhD.

They talked until their cups had been empty for so long that the paper cups were now cold and the conversation finally lulled.

Abel leaned forward, an air of solemnity descended upon him as he crossed his hands on the tabletop. “So. I’m surprised you decided to actually come here. I wouldn’t have expected even an earthquake to be enough to get you to come back.”

Lincoln shrugged, and the damned chair rocked backwards the tiniest of bits. “Maybe I realized that it was time.”

“Maybe so.” Abel’s dark eyes narrowed, and Lincoln knew he could tell that there was something else he wasn’t saying. “But why? What’s your real reason for coming back here, Linc? I know it’s not the earthquake.”

Lincoln opened his mouth to claim that yes, of course it was the earthquake, but something stopped him. Maybe it was the earnestest in his oldest friends face or the fact that they’d just spent nearly two hours talking about their lives and all the things they’d kept from each other for years. But instead of following his deep-set instincts and pushing back, Lincoln said something else instead.

“Something’s happening to the Power. It’s different. I don’t know how to explain it but, it’s like Vax…” He trailed off. He never spoke of Vax to anyone other than the stillness of the night. Even after his funeral, Lincoln had remained silent, preferring the therapy of a bottle to the therapy of warm remembrance. Yet here he was, sitting across from Abel at a diner, saying the words that had been building up inside him for months. “It’s like… he’s still here. I can feel his presence everywhere.”

Abel was silent for an extended moment, giving space for Lincoln to continue. When he didn’t, Abel cleared his throat. “I know it was hard for you to lose him. It was hard for all of us. It’s only natural that you’d still feel him nearby.”

Lincoln groaned. “Don’t try to tell me that these are just my emotions playing tricks on me. We both know that my psychometry allows me to sense the Power and auras around me. Besides, you used to see literal ghosts.”

“Wait…” Abel’s eyes widened. “You mean you can literally sense Vax? In a psychometry way, not just a grief way?”

Lincoln rolled his head back with a groan. “I’m sorry, it’s stupid. I shouldn’t have brought it up. Yeah, I’m just here because of the earthquake, because—”

“It’s not stupid,” Abel interrupted, and one look at the solemnity in his eyes proved that he was being genuine. “You mean you think that Vax is sort of alive, somehow? Sort of like how Lila used to be alive after becoming that ghost, or Loha’s consciousness was able to speak to us after Vax removed the stake from her body?”

Lincoln nodded slowly. “Something like that. And I think… I think that the earthquake yesterday might’ve had something to do with him, too.”

Abel leaned back in his chair, his hand rubbing his chin thoughtfully. His eyes went distant like they always did whenever he was lost in thought, piecing together puzzle pieces and searching for answers. “If that earthquake ties back to Vax, then we have to do something about it.”

“I agree.” Lincoln got to his feet, his empty coffee cup in his hand. “That’s why I need to go back to the caves and see what’s happened to him. If something’s changing him—twisting him—then I might just be the only one who can get through to him.”

***

About a half hour later, Abel parked his car outside of the caves and turned off the engine. Heavy silence hung over them as they waited, for what, they weren’t sure.

“Are you sure you want to do this alone?” Abel finally said, breaking the tense stillness in the air.

“Of course I don’t want to do this alone. That’s why you’re here.”

“You know what I mean. Those caves…” Abel’s eyes dropped to the steering wheel, the corner of his lips tightly downturned. “There are memories in there, Lincoln. Memories that are difficult to face alone.”

Lincoln clapped Abel on the shoulder—a confident gesture, betrayed in tone only by the ever-so-slight trembling of his fingers. “All memories have to be faced sooner or later.”

“Even the corpses?”

Lincoln’s forced smile faded. Abel wasn’t referring to metaphorical corpses; he was talking about Vax. It was the reason Lincoln hadn’t gone back, not once, even though the others had ventured deep inside the caves to leave flowers, notes, and gifts for Vax’s memory. His body was there, a knife still stabbed through the mass of decomposing, waterlogged flesh and bone.

Lincoln wasn’t sure he could face seeing that corpse. But he knew that he had to try.

“Just wait out here for me,” Lincoln said. “If I need anything, I’ll send you a text.”

“You seriously think you’ll have service all the way down there?”

“...It’s possible?”

Abel sighed, but didn’t push further. Perhaps he could see in Lincoln’s eyes just how important this was for him. He remained in the car as Lincoln stepped out and crossed over the familiar mountain path with its dense pine trees and underbrush to the hole in the side of the mountain, gaping out from the rock like a jagged maw.

The last time Lincoln was here—

No. He wouldn’t think of it. The ghosts couldn’t come back, not yet, not until he had actually reached Vax and found answers for the questions that hung over his head.

Lincoln closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and stepped into the caves.

The moment he was inside, he could feel it—the Power. It hummed in the caves, dense and overbearing, and yet so familiar all the same. He pressed one hand against the rock and using his gift, he quickly navigated the maze of twisted rock and dense, stony chambers until he reached the Power source at the heart of it all.

The chamber glowed with an otherworldly light, bathing the walls with aqua rays and rippling across the still surface of the small spring in the center of the chamber. Behind the body of water was the breach—a flickering, pulsating mass of cyan light and energy that was so thick and heavy, it was almost a concrete, physical thing.

And there, partly submerged in the luminescent pool of water, was Vax. Or what was left of him, anyway. A tattered, disintegrating leather trench coat, stubbornly clinging to decrepit human remains… Lincoln forced his gaze up from the corpse and to the breach above it. He took a step forward—

And froze. The feeling in the air… it was so strong and familiar that it took Lincoln’s breath away.

Because he was right. Vax was there, and not in the way that someone’s ashes keep their presence alive or your mind thinks you hear the voice of someone you lost long after they’re gone. Vax was there. Not quite alive but not quite dead, existing alongside the Power, infusing it with such Vax-ness that Lincoln knew he could never unsee it.

He approached the glowing rift and carefully held out a hand.

“Vax?” he said softly.

Silence, and then—

The softest moan swept through the cavern, carried on a wind that had no source. It brushed against Lincoln’s face, caressed his cheek, tossed aside the strands of hair hanging in his face.

Lincoln’s breath caught, and his knees grew weak. He lost his balance and started to fall toward the breach, but a force, gentle as a breeze but powerful as a storm, kept him upright. Lincoln’s heart caught and hope filled his chest. He lifted his eyes to see who had caught him—

But no one was there. At least no one who was alive.

“Vax… I know you’re here with me.” A hollow whistle echoed throughout the chamber and Lincoln’s shirt collar fluttered. “Do you remember me? It’s me, Lincoln.” The water rippled, but still nothing that Lincoln could understand. So he reached out once more and held his hand in the light of the glowing breach.

At once the world faded and Lincoln found himself somewhere else—a plane of nothingness, an existence composed solely of blinding white light. He squinted against the brightness, his hand rising instinctively to shade his eyes, and that’s when he saw him. Vax.

He was standing right there, across the plane from Lincoln. His hair was the same bright pink it had always been, and he was wearing the same black leather and silvery jewelry that he always did. But the look in his eyes… it was one of pure pain, of agony. One eye twisted shut in a silent scream while the other was a gaping, bloody socket that streaked scarlet down his face.

But he was there.

A sob weighed heavily on Lincoln’s throat and he tripped forward. “Vax!” he called out. Vax’s single eye shot wide open, and Lincoln reached for him, anticipation filling him at the prospect of having Vax in his arms once more. But when he tried to touch him, his hands passed right through him as if he were nothing more than vapor, and he collapsed in a heap onto the misty white void.

Vax gasped at the near contact. When he tried to speak, his voice was fractured, shattered, like he’d lost the parts of himself that he’d once used to express himself.

“L… nc…” he choked out.

Lincoln rose to his feet, his former hope and anticipation nothing but splintered remains. But he tried to push the disappointment aside. He may not fully understand what was happening, but Vax was here. It was more than he’d had in over a year.

“Vax,” he said again, gentler this time.

He took in Vax’s face, and now that he looked closer he could see that there was a wrongness about it. It wasn’t the same Vax he had known. Despite the brightness of the void around him, a shadow hung over Vax’s brow, and his entire face was twisted with bottomless pain. And his eyes… it was like they were seeing everything and nothing at the same time, staring at Lincoln while simultaneously staring through him.

But Lincoln didn’t back away. He stepped closer, until his forehead was mere inches from Vax’s own transparent one.

“I’m sorry this happened to you,” Lincoln said, his voice soft and gentle.

Vax’s ragged breath shuddered and a ripple passed over his face. “Why… y… ou… come…”

“Because I will always be at your side whenever you need me. In life or in death, I will always be there for you. We promised each other, Vax. Do you remember?”

Vax’s expression was blank, no hint of recollection anywhere in his face. So Lincoln remembered for him.

Images flashed through his mind. Moonlight filtering through a shuttered window— different shades of intertwined skin— soft lips upon a neck—

And then the words drifted in: “You give me the strength to live, just for the honor of staying by your side” and “I am yours” and finally, “In life or in death, always know that I will be there for you.”

A blip passed over Vax, like some sort of glitch. Within the next second he was yards back, on his knees and clutching his forehead as he screamed out in pain, but before Lincoln could react, he flickered right back to where he had been standing. But this time, the shadow was gone from his face. The wrongness was still there, but it was less pronounced. Lincoln could see the Vax he knew in his beautiful, familiar features.

“Lincoln…” Vax said.

“I’m here.”

A smile flickered across Vax’s lips, but then it dropped as soon as it came and he groaned in pain.

“It hurts,” he whispered, hands fisting over his heart. There was nothing there in this projection of his body apart from a crimson stain that seeped from the center of his chest. “It hurts so badly.”

“I know it does, Vax. I know.” Lincoln stepped closer. “Is there anything I can do to make it hurt less?”

Vax shook his head, his arms wrapping around himself. “It’s impossible. This pain will never go away. It’s endless.”

“I’m so sorry.” Lincoln knew it was pointless, but he couldn’t resist. He reached a hand out to Vax’s cheek, and his fingers passed through, just as he expected. “I wish I could do something to help.”

“Every single second it’s nothing but agony… and fury…” A shadow passed over Vax’s face, and pure rage flickered in his remaining cyan eye. “He did this to me. Matthias…”

And Lincoln could feel it somewhere deep inside him—a distant rumbling and quaking earth—as Vax’s anger pooled out in all directions. With a spark of understanding, Lincoln realized without any doubt what had caused the earthquake. He didn’t know how, or why, but Vax’s pain was so great that it could reach far and wide, causing devastation and death without him even realizing it.

As his mind drifted to the fallen buildings and smoky sheen of debris back in Las Vegas, Vax’s eye widened in horror. He must’ve seen Lincoln’s memories, just like he’d seen the memories of their love.

“What is this?” he asked, but from the look on his face, Lincoln could tell he already knew.

Lincoln pushed the thoughts away. “It’s nothing you need to worry about.”

“I… caused this?”

“No,” Lincoln insisted with a firm shake of his head. “It wasn’t your fault. You’ve been hurt, tortured. You can’t realize what you’re doing.”

“So much death and destruction, all because of me…” Vax’s incorporeal form shuddered and he shrunk back. “I did this. I’m a monster. I never wanted to be this thing, I never wanted to hurt people, I—”

“You’re not a monster, Vax. My father is the monster. Not you. Never you. And I’ll come here every single day if that’s what it takes to remind you.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when Vax was flinching backward, a visceral horror etched onto his features. “No. You can’t do that, Lincoln, I would never ask that of you! I’m not really here, living a life with me won’t make you happy. It wouldn’t be real.” At his agitation, the blood in Vax’s chest gurgled and more spilled out across his chest. “You can’t give up your life to be stuck in the past with me. I won’t let you.”

“If me being here with you is what it takes to get your mind off the pain or to convince you that you’re not the monster you fear you are, I’ll gladly live the rest of my life in this dream.”

“Don’t be stupid, Lincoln.”

“But—”

Before Lincoln could say anything else, the world around him began to dissolve, until he was watching the same scene from a different angle. He was up above, looking down on a vision of Vax and an older, unfamiliar man as they stood across from each other in the void. They weren’t touching—they couldn’t—and though Lincoln got the sense that the two had spent years like this in the void together, Vax’s pain and anger was no less than it was in reality.

“Look what I’ve done to you,” Vax’s voice murmured from below. “I should never have let you visit me like this. You’ve thrown your life away for nothing. Look how quickly being here has aged you.”

“It wasn’t for nothing,” the other man said, and with a start, Lincoln realized he was looking down at himself. It was his voice—albeit weak with age—and his eyes. His hair was snow white, and his skin was sagging and wrinkled, but it was him. He’d spent his entire life tied to a ghost in a phantom world, and Vax’s anger and regret was even stronger than it was now.

“My life is mine to give, and I chose to give it to you,” the older Lincoln said. “As long as I’m alive, you shouldn’t have to suffer alone.”

“But soon you’ll be gone, and I’ll have to live the rest of eternity knowing that you shortened your own lifespan and dedicated the few years you had left because of me.” And though he was incorporeal, glistening, glowing tears glittered down Vax’s cheek. “I never wanted this for you.”

A stricken look passed over the older Lincoln’s face as he realized the truth in Vax’s words. He could dedicate his meager years to living by Vax’s side, but eventually, he would die. And when he did, Vax would be alone, and all that all remained with him would be the guilt that Lincoln had given up his life for him.

The faded until Lincoln was back in the void, standing across from Vax.

“Now do you see?” Vax asked. “The reason I don’t want you to stay here with me?”

Despite everything he’d just seen, Lincoln shook his head. “I don’t care. I’d do it, Vax. I’d do it for you!”

“No.” Vax’s eye flashed, and a pulse of energy rippled through the void. “Taking your life from you would truly make me a monster. I don’t want you to sacrifice yourself for me. I want you to live for me.”

The air vibrated as if confirming the truth of Vax’s words, but still Lincoln couldn’t bear to hear it.

“But what about you?” he asked. “I can’t leave you here alone. I need to help you remember who you used to be, to offer you something besides this constant misery.”

Vax’s lips pulled into the softest of smiles, so faint it was barely there but clear enough to speak volumes. “You already have. Just this brief moment with you is enough for me to hold onto and to remember why I can never give into my anger. This moment has given me all that I need to never lash out and hurt others again.”

“I need to take responsibility for this, Vax. It’s my fault you’re here. If I hadn’t allowed myself to get hurt, if I hadn’t let you love me—”

“You didn’t let me love you, Lincoln. I fought for the chance to, and eventually you gave in.” Vax’s expression faltered, his brow furrowing with worry. “But now, we have to move forward. We can’t be chained by these feelings, we have to accept them for how they were and move forward. You’re still alive, Lincoln, and you can’t waste your life away here with me. Even being here for as long as you have is taking its toll on you.”

Something inside Lincoln ached, and he knew that Vax was right. It was as if he could feel himself aging and growing weaker with each second he spent here. If he came back here, how long would it be before he turned into the man from the vision, old and stricken with years?

“You have to leave this place,” Vax said with a decisive nod. “If you won’t leave willingly, I’ll just have to make you.” He closed his eyes, and Lincoln felt the world around him start to shift.

“No, Vax, I’m not ready—”

“Promise me you’ll live, Lincoln. Knowing that you’re somewhere out there, still caring for me, is all that I need to endure this existence I’ve been sentenced to.”

Wind began to whip at Lincoln’s hair, and Vax’s body dimmed until it was nothing but a dense cloud.

“Vax…”

“Promise me you’ll move on and won’t come back to this place!” Vax’s voice boomed all around him, like it was everywhere and yet nowhere, all at once.

“I can’t—”

“Please, promise me!” His voice was desperate, and Lincoln couldn’t stand to be another cause of Vax’s pain. So he found himself shouting, “I promise!”

The chaos seemed to fade, and Vax offered a whispered “Thank you.”

When Lincoln opened his eyes once more, he was back in the Power chamber. The familiar presence was still there, warm as a caress, wrapped around him with a care, and faint words echoed throughout the stillness of the cavern:

“When everything else fades and nothing is left in this world, I will remain. And I will love you. When all living creatures have passed on and their memories with them, I’ll still be here. And I will remember you.” A gentle breeze stroked Lincoln’s face, and tears pooled in his eyes as he closed them. “You deserve every good thing this world has to offer, and I’m sorry that we couldn’t have the life together that we so desperately wanted. But at least in death, I can make sure that someone on this earth will always remember you, and will always love you.”

With these words following after him, he turned his back on Vax and made his way back out of the cavern, tears hanging from his eyelashes like tiny crystals.

Abel was pacing anxiously beside his car when Lincoln emerged from the cave, and he stopped abruptly the moment he saw Lincoln. “You made it!”

He ran for Lincoln just as Lincoln’s legs gave out beneath his weight. His breath was heavy, and his hair had fallen loose. Abel slung Lincoln’s arm around his shoulder and helped him walk back to the car.

“What happened?” Abel asked once they were both sitting in the car. “And Linc, your hair…”

Lincoln ran his fingers through the bangs falling in his face, pulling them into his line of sight, and his breath caught. A stripe of his dark hair had faded snowy white, as if only this part of himself had aged rapidly in the past hour.

“Whatever you did, it took its toll on you,” Abel said, his eyes sad.

“It…” Images, both terrible and beautiful, danced across Lincoln’s memory. If there were words to describe what he had just experienced, he did not have them. At least not yet. “It was him. He’s gone, but he’s here, and he needed me.”

Abel’s forehead wrinkled with concern. “Lincoln… You can’t become like Noah. Especially if visiting him ages you like this.”

“I won’t be like Noah. I…” Lincoln‘s breath shook, and he forced himself to continue. “I promised Vax that I wouldn’t come back here to see him anymore. He wants me to live, not to be shackled to a ghost.”

“Is that a promise you can keep?”

Lincoln’s hand tightened into a fist in his lap. “I know I can’t bring him back, and I know that spending my life with him is impossible. Even if he’s sort of here, he’s not really. Beignets together is nothing more than a dream that’s passed, and I’d be stupid to try to go back to it.”

Abel nodded, a clear look of relief on his face.

“He’s much more powerful than Loha ever was, and more capable of destruction when he’s angry and hurt,” Lincoln continued, “but I believe that seeing me today awoke something inside of him. We still can’t be together—that hasn’t changed—but that little moment together has changed both of us. And I truly believe that he won’t be lashing out and hurting anyone anymore.”

As if in confirmation, the Power in the air around Lincoln buzzed warm and comforting, and he knew it was Vax.

Beside him. Abel turned on the car. “Let’s get you back to your hotel. I think you need some rest.”

They drove away from the caves, and Lincoln knew he wouldn’t be back. Just as Vax would keep his promise to temper his anger, Lincoln would keep his promise to move forward, and in so doing, they would forever honor the love they had for each other.

***

When Matthias felt Vax again, he was just sitting down for dinner at one of the most distinguished restaurants in Majorca. Aside from the other wealthy patrons occupying the tables around him and his dedicated server, he was alone, though he didn’t mind the solace of spending a meal by himself.

“Are you alright, my friend?” Matthias murmured. The presence was there, challenging him.

You have no power over me.

And somehow, he knew that it was true. Whatever had happened between now and the first time he’d felt Vax’s presence had impacted him so deeply that the simmering anger—which was still there—no longer consumed his soul.

A wry smile pulled at his lips. “Lincoln. I have you to thank for this, don’t I?”

Enjoy your power while it lasts, fuckface. As soon as I learn to cut you off from myself, you’re going down.

Matthias chuckled at the threat. It was nothing more than a child attempting to be powerful and brave. At least, that’s what he told himself. The white knuckles, flushed face, and quickened heartbeat told another story.

But that story no longer matters. What matters is this: if Vax hadn’t fallen in love, perhaps he would have won in the battle against Matthias. But now… his love was what was saving him. The tale of this love didn’t look like lazy mornings spent in one another’s embrace, or romantic trips in the tropics. This love didn’t save Vax’s life, it didn’t keep Lincoln from loneliness. But its power was there in a different way.

It happened. It mattered. Just the memory of so great a love was enough to soothe an abused, battered soul and to give a broken heart the courage to move forward.

And sometimes, that is enough.

#it lives within #ilw #playchoices #my writing #lincoln x mc #lincoln mcquoid #lincoln aquino #it lives anthology

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atonalginger · 11 months ago

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WIP Wednesday

Today I have a excerpt from my upcoming Ranger and the Deputy fic staring Ranger!Delgado and Kitty Lincoln.

I tag @fangbangerghoul, @eridanidreams, @silurisanguine, @bearlytolerant, @toxiclizardwrites (I think you shared today but tagging anyway!), @aro-pancake, @aislingdmdt, @a-cosmic-elf, @lisa-and-shadow, @thatsgoodsquishy0, and anyone else who might have something to share. No pressure, let's have fun:)

Delgado pulled her close and stole a kiss on her jaw as they approached the Coe Heritage Museum. Kitty giggled and turned, catching his cheek in her hand and kissed him back. Her lips were soft against his, a heat, intensity in the moment. He held her against him, his hand firmly at the small of her back, and dipped her as his lips trailed down her neck. He bit her neck and quickly kissed it to soothe the skin. She gasped and let out a breathy giggle. He wondered if they could make it to the bar.

He stood her back up and was met with a hungry kiss, her arms slung around his neck, her weight and momentum throwing them off balance. They stumbled back together into the side of the Enhance! Building, her fingers in his hair rubbing his scalp, his hands firmly gripping her hips.

“Hey, knock it off,” a firm voice from the path called over to them. As they reluctantly pulled away from each other a flashlight blinded Delgado, causing him to curse in Spanish and flip the bird at the guard. They were both panting, Kitty leaned forward to rest her forehead on his shoulder.

“Ranger?” the guard lowered his flashlight, “come on, you know better.”

“Don’t you have anything better to do with your time?” Del shot back, “maybe go take a long stroll over to Laredos and see if you can find the thief Annie mentioned a while back.”

“We both know that kid was seeing things,” the guard flipped the flashlight off and hooked it back onto their belt, “just…if you’re going to be doing that sort of thing, go home.”

Kitty was mumbling into his scarf, “oh gee thanks, officer. We never would have figured that one out if you hadn’t come along.”

Delgado gave a hearty laugh and kissed her head, “Vamos, Diego is waiting at Aggie’s.”

They hurried down the switchback stairs and down into the Stretch. The sounds of Aggie’s, blaring generic rock music, the crashing of glass bottles into a bin or onto the floor, the shouting and laughing, spilled out into the muddy path. As they approached three men spilled out the main doors, one tumbling back into a large puddle, another swinging for the third, missing, and losing his balance. Aggie herself appeared in the doorway, a bat in hand, “Git!”

“Still want to go?” Delgado asked, his arm draped over Kitty’s shoulder.

“At least one drink with Diego,” she bumped her hip into him.

He nodded and they approached the bar, Aggie still lingering in the doorway. She eyed the couple suspiciously and relaxed her shoulders, “Del, nice seeing you again.”

“I see you’re having a busy evening,” he glanced back at one of the three drunks she had just ejected, “not too much trouble, right?”

“Those three? Fucking idiots,” Aggie shook her head and spit into a nearby puddle, “mind the floors, Ethan’s still mopping up the mess.”

“Please tell me its beer,” Delgado wrinkled his nose.

“Thankfully,” Aggie took a step to the side to let them pass, “Diego grabbed the usual table and already ordered. Ethan will bring the drinks out when he’s done.”

“Thanks Aggie,” Del touched his forehead with his index finger and gave a small salute before leading Kitty inside. He leaned in and whispered into her ear, “hopefully that was the last of it.”

Diego waved them over to his table, Ethan next to him with a tray with shots of golden liquor, a salt shaker, and a small dish of lime slices. Delgado sighed at the sight and let loose a string of Spanish curses under his breath.

“Problem?” Kitty leaned in close to his ear to combat the loud music. Her breath felt good on his neck.

“Oh just Diego’s idea of getting drinks is all,” he responded, his lips now pressed against her ear.

“We’ll be fine,” she tickled at his side as they stepped up to the table. He jumped slightly with a laugh and shook his head.

“Took your time,” Diego looked between them. Del caught Diego staring at her neck and looked over to see his bite bright against her pale skin, “Get lost?”

“We took the scenic route, Del wanted to show me the sights,” Kitty leaned against the table, eyeing the shots on the tray.

“Oh I’m sure he did,” Diego smirked.

Delgado leaned over to Deigo and hissed through his teeth, “shut it.”

“Someone cultivates agave out here?” Kitty picked up one of the glasses and sniffed the contents, “New Homestead used to but someone in my dad’s generation messed up a soil change and killed the whole crop. No one could get it going again and they were told by MAST our crop was the last of it.”

“Probably for the UC,” Diego said before licking the side of his hand and shaking salt onto the wet skin, “but yeah, Del’s family owns like six massive greenhouses of the stuff out on Codos.”

“They do?” She looked at Del with big, bright eyes, “that’s amazing.” Delgado bobbed his head side to side, irritated with Diego’s rambling but not wanting to show it, “You ever had tequila?”

“Once. Anja got a bottle in the tavern and served it to celebrate a milestone a few years back. Everyone got a drink with a shot in it; I remember it was pretty sour,” she shook her head and sat the small glass on the table, “In New Homestead we brew vodka, rum, and gin in house. We serve it at our tavern but only the locals really drink it; the tourists all complain that it’s too harsh.”

“Harsh?” Diego lowered his hand, no longer ready to hurry the group into their first shot.

“Apparently you aren’t suppose to be able to taste them when mixed with lots of juices or soda?” Kitty shrugged, “I’m not sure. I just know that tourists will order a mixed drink and complain that they can taste it and it’s bad but…it’s fine? I mean it’s alcohol, it’s not going to taste like candy and sunshine.”

Diego threw his head back and laughed hard enough to draw attention from other tables, “Is New Homestead brewing moonshine?”

“We don’t exactly have room for a lot of extra equipment,” Kitty explained, “they could probably stand to filter the vodka a few more times, that one can make he shudder something fierce, and sometimes the gin tastes like the floor cleaner smells but again it’s alcohol, it’s not supposed to be nice, it’s meant to get you drunk.”

“¡Mierda! You poor soul,” Diego was wiping tears from his eyes, “It doesn’t have to be that bad.”

“Diego, they live under the ice,” Del reminded him, “they’re making due.”

“They shouldn’t have to, they belong to the fucking United Colonies. They aren’t some LIST settlement!” Diego exclaimed. He pointed at the salt shaker, “Okay, Kitty, you saw what I did, copy that. Once we have that we lick the salt, take the shot, and bite the lime once you swallow.”

“That seems like a lot for a shot,” she tilted her head to the side with a quizzical look.

“It allegedly makes the shot taste better,” Delgado picked up his shot and looked to Diego, “or you could just shoot it and not be a pussy about it.”

“I didn’t order your family’s tequila,” Diego shook his head, “it don’t go down smooth without it.”

Delgado held Diego’s stare for a beat and then threw the shot back unceremoniously. It did burn a bit, the aftertaste wrinkling his nose for a second, but it was fine. He sat the shot glass down and looked over in time to watch Kitty swallow and set hers down as well. She looked completely unphased by the cheap tequila, wearing a toothy grin at Diego who grumbled about them being no fun before licking his hand, shooting his shot, and biting down on a wedge of lime. Kitty reached over and took one of the lime wedges and bit into it, clearly curious to what it might add to the taste.

“Ethan!” Diego called over to the bartender, “another round por favor!”

“You sure, you big baby,” Delgado taunted his fellow ranger, “you barely handled the last one.”

“Vete a la verga,” Diego snarled back.

Delgado could feel Kitty looking at them. When he looked back she was still smiling, “how many ‘another rounds’ you counting on, ranger? Del and I do have work to do tomorrow.”

“Just one more,” Diego held up his hands in mock defense, “so we can have a proper toast.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Del pointed a finger at Diego, “arguing with Jacob will give me a headache enough, I don’t want to be hung over.”

“Thought you said no work talk,” Diego leaned in.

Delgado touched Diego’s cheek and pushed his face away with minimal force. Diego laughed and clapped his friend’s shoulder as Ethan delivered the second round. Diego thanked the bartender, who gave a noncommittal nod and shuffled back to the bar.

“Don’t go crazy with the toast,” Del reached for his glass.

“I won’t,” Diego waited for Kitty to take her glass and then raised his own, “To your success today at the GalBank, to your success tomorrow, and each day forward. Arriba, abajo, al centro, y dentro. Salud!”

As Diego said the back half of his toast he raised his glass, lowered it, and pushed it to the center with Delgado following suit and Kitty trailing behind, unfamiliar with the tradition, before finishing the toast and throwing back the shot. Delgado echoed his ‘salud’ and Kitty quietly followed suit before taking her shot. Delgado and Kitty watched Diego shake off his grimace and then shared an amused look.

“Oh shove it your people drink paint thinner,” Diego waved off her look with a laugh, “go on and get out of here, I know you both want to.”

“You know nothing, Diego,” Delgado laughed and clapped his friend’s shoulder, “don’t get too wild tonight.”

“I’d say the same to you but we both know neither of us listen.” Diego’s darted his eyes to Kitty and back to Delgado and winked. While the two rangers bantered Delgado missed the young man who sidled up to Kitty with a drink in hand. When he turned around he saw her leaned back against the wall, one hand around an empty shot glass and her eyes glued to Del.

“Your wasting your time with the lawmen here,” the young man said, his words slurred, “why don’t you come sit with me, I can show you a good time.”

“That’s it?” Kitty asked loud enough to be heard over the music,

“That’s all you’ve got? I’ve heard 12 year old boys serve better pick-up lines!”

“Man, fuck you, you fat cow,” the man stumbled as he thrust his pointed index finger inches from her chest, “I was being nice!”

“Go be nice somewhere else,” Delgado shoved the man, knocking him to the floor and spilling his drink. He clapped his hands together like he was knocking dust off and then held out a hand to Kitty, “shall we, Kitten?” Delgado heard Diego behind him, “Dios Mio.”

Kitty’s skin was flush, though Del couldn’t tell if that was arousal or the alcohol, desire plain in her eyes. She took his hand and stepped over the downed drunk, “thought you’d never ask.”

#starfield fanfiction #atonalginger writes #wip wednesday #Starfield Delgado #Delgado x starfarer #ranger!delgado #don't know when I'm going to start uploading #part of me wants to write it like I did Starborn Saga #part of me wants to upload in chunks as I go #mmmm Chunks

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toxicanonymity · 2 years ago

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The dirty ground. Left in Lincoln, pt. 2

5k | dark dads' best friend!Joel x virgin f!Reader

story master list / joel miller master list

He was always so neat and clean. How despeate he must have been to kneel down right there. He really couldn't help himself. You sighed and he tore his mouth away. He looked up at you, captivated. "You're so beautiful, peaches."

WARNINGS/NOTES: NSFW 18+, creepy perv Joel, big girthy age gap, inexperienced but legal reader, angst, masturbation, fingering, dry humping, pressure, alcohol, pining, graphic descriptions of produce, playing fast and loose with how fruits and vegetables work. Slow-burn horror, you may have disturbing thoughts. Reader can sit on Joel and he can put his arms around her.

You were one big knot of tension after Joel left that night - the first night he kissed you. After showering and getting ready for bed, you laid on top of your comforter, fantasizing and eventually touching yourself. You thought about his hardness pressed against you and his lips on yours. You imagined what his dick was like, what it would feel like against your naked front, and what he looked like with his own hand wrapped around it. You had to assume he was pleasuring himself at the same time you were, and the thought of that had you closer than you’d ever been before to making yourself come.

Until a thump outside cruelly interrupted you, followed by frantic rustling and a muffled screech. Your skin erupted in the wrong kind of goosebumps. You stayed as still as you could. The rustling continued but became erratic. You couldn’t tell where it was coming from, but it was closer than the noises before. Eventually, you crept to your window and peeked outside, carefully nudging the curtain open just a smidgen to remain hidden. The moon was big and white, but you saw nothing.

You began to wish you asked Joel to stay over, but your independence meant something to you. You also weren’t quite ready for what might happen if he did. The rustling became less frequent and tapered off to blend in with the night. You slowed your breath and stared at a spot on your ceiling. Soon you were back to thinking about Joel massaging his hard bulge behind you. You closed your eyes and rubbed your clit, replaying it all. You were so, so close. Feelin’ this against you, knowin’ it’s there. You took a deep breath - you were on the very edge when a loud rustling jerked you back to reality.

You gave up, more frustrated than scared this time. You didn’t bother going to the window. You took some deep breaths, stared at the spot on the ceiling, and prayed for a sex dream. They brought you occasional relief in a world where you didn’t seem to have the confidence or attention span to do it yourself. Until now - you were so close, you were positive you could have.

In the following days, as you did chores and took care of the property, you thought about little else but Joel and his body against yours. You had never seen a hard dick in person. You tried to push away thoughts of how many women had probably seen and felt him. You had to be the least capable of any of them. The way things were going, and the way you kind of wanted things to go, you wanted to be more prepared, but there wasn’t much you could do about that. You dug out an old filthy magazine from the garage and studied it. The guys were so . . . naked. You liked Joel in his jeans and flannel. You wondered what he looked like under all that, but you were satisfied with his clothes being on.

You slept better the second night. The next day, you went for a walk. The community was so dead, it made the fresh air feel stale. The sun blazed and you wished you brought a hat. The crunch of dead leaves and broken asphalt under your feet was all you heard for a while. You walked past Joel’s property and thought about stopping but were too embarrassed. Maybe on the way back, you thought. You walked all the way to Abe’s place toward the back but didn’t see his truck. It was about time for him to come by the house to check the perimeter surveillance, but you hadn’t seen him yet. Sometimes you could hear the radio from there, but not today. He had invited you to come over and see the radio station some time, but you hadn’t yet.

You didn’t stop by Joel’s on the way back either. You slowed down a little, thinking maybe he’d come outside, but you were relieved he didn’t. You didn’t see him in the windows, but you felt watched. You felt naked. Your cheeks burned and you quickened your pace.

When you got home, you went out back to pick vegetables. You got on your knees and inhaled the dirt. It reminded you of gardening with Bill and Frank and you got your first rush of optimism about their return. You remembered how Frank and you tried to surprise Bill with a Strawberry patch for fathers’ day. The patch didn’t last - Bill was the gardener among you, and trying to hide the patch didn’t give it the sun it needed. But Bill loved it and had a good laugh about you and Frank bumbling around behind his back. Bill didn’t laugh often and you savored every time he did. They would come back, they had to - You still had to plant a new Strawberry patch.

You picked some carrots, then found yourself choosing an oblong eggplant for dinner. You ran your hand over it and felt a pang between your legs. You felt bad for not stopping at Joel’s house on your walk. You thought about going back and asking him to join you for dinner.

You started to stand up to go back inside, then the cucumber vine caught your eye and your heart rate quickened. You knelt down again. You looked at their sizes and shapes and stroked them, followed their pale stripes and little ridges. You squeezed them, first with your fingertips, then with your fist. You were embarrassed you didn't know how to do anything. You found one that felt right, and you plucked it off the vine. You held it in one hand and made a loose fist with the other. You ran your fist up and down the cucumber before tightening your grip around it again. You studied it and almost put it in your mouth, despite hating cucumbers. Your cheeks burned at your next thought about what to do with it.

“Aren’t you always pickin’ the cucumbers off your salad?”

You jumped when Joel's low voice startled you from your filthy thoughts.

“Didn’t mean to scare ya, darlin’ . . .”

Your heart was racing. You wanted to die. You had no idea how long he was standing there. You also didn't know he noticed these things about you - that you picked the cucumbers out of your salad.

You caught your breath and turned to face him. He was standing with his hands casually on his hips, shirt tucked in, hair neatly combed as usual. Your face gave you away, and a look of concern spread across his face.

“You okay, peaches?” He stepped forward and put his hand on your back, his first touch giving you butterflies as usual.

"Sorry, um." Your face was on fire. "Yeah. . .I’ve been hearing things at night. . .Guess that’s why I’m jumpy.”

“What kinda things?”

“I dunno, rustling, screeching. . .”

He reassured you it was probably just the house.

“Thumping. Scratching one night. I know it’s probably just animals. . .”

Joel squinted at the cucumber in your hand.

You panicked and explained the despised produce. “I was gonna see if you wanted to come for dinner."

He smiled kindly and looked you up and down. "Count me in," he said with a wink. "Here, I'll take those." He extended his hands for the basket and cucumber. Your ears tingled, and as you handed him the cucumber, you couldn't meet his eyes. You watched his hand. The way he gripped it with his thumb near the tip reminded you of the dirty magazines. If that weren’t enough, he slowly brushed it with his thumb. Your whole body got hot and you finally looked up at him. He raised an eyebrow that made you think he must have been watching you for a while before he approached. You looked away.

Joel brought the produce inside. “Wanna come over and go for a walk? Pick some apples, make some juice to have with dinner?”

“Sure.” You went upstairs to get a hat. You had been wanting to go to the orchard.

When you came back down the stairs, Joel’s face darkened as he looked at you. It caught you off guard and you said, “what?”

He brushed it off, mustering a quick smile. “Nothin’, peaches. Ready to go?”

You set off together toward Joel’s house and walked mostly in silence. That look of his when you came down the stairs bothered you. It was like you did something wrong. You couldn’t put it out of your mind, so you wracked your brain. It was a Red Sox hat - surely Joel wasn’t a Yankees fan. No, he wasn’t the type to care about sports at all. You could only come up with one theory. Jesse had a Red Sox hat, too. Joel would have seen it when Jesse was helping him in the orchard. It wasn’t exactly the same. Jesse’s was worse for the wear. But maybe Joel thought this was Jesse’s? A parting gift?

It would be a silly assumption. There were plenty of Red Sox hats in Massachusetts. If the outbreak hadn’t happened, the post season would have started the next week. You always heard the Sox would have won the World Series.

But just in case it was about Jesse, you tried to smooth it over.

“Papa gave me this when he started teaching me about the garden,” you said, adjusting the brim of the cap.

"Bill's a good gardener," Joel responded flatly.

You thought you saw a hint of relief on his face, but it was hard to tell because he was squinting. You wondered why Joel never wore a hat even when the sun was so high. You didn’t mind his squinting though. It looked good on him like everything else.

The rest of the walk, you talked about the Boston QZ. You asked why Tommy stayed there and didn’t come to Lincoln. Joel said not everybody liked the farm life. You said you often wondered what life was like in the QZ and that you’d love to try it. Joel assured you that you weren’t missing out on anything.

Once you got to his house, Joel grabbed an apple basket from inside. You walked through the orchard in silence. Everything felt too still, and you were glad to have Joel by your side. He started telling you about the different trees and how picking apples differs from peaches.

Your eyes fell on the corner of a garden bed near the back fence. “What’d you end up planting back there?” you asked and noticed the mess of dirt next to it. “Are you doin’ it now?”

“What?”

“The new garden beds?” You realized your mistake when it was too late. Joel stopped walking.

“How do you. . .” He trailed off, then sighed. “Hurts my feelin’s, peaches. When you come by and don’t even bother sayin’ hi.”

“Oh, I didn’t – Jesse mentioned–when y’all were digging–” You weren’t sure which was worse in his eyes, talking to Jesse or coming over without seeing him.

Joel clenched his jaw. It turned out Jesse was worse. “Heh,” he looked down and laughed in bad humor, as though Jesse should obviously be a sore subject. Maybe he ghosted Joel, too. Joel smoothed his hair and answered you. “Haven’t planted anything yet.”

You stared at the ground for a beat of tense silence, then Joel tried to get things back on track. “Why, got a request? Maybe some squash, watermelon?”

“Strawberries?”

“Strawberries. . .” he smiled. “Alright, peaches. We’ll plant you some strawberries.” He cupped your cheek and looked at you affectionately.

“C’mon, let’s find our tree.”

Our tree.

Joel touched your hand, then interlaced his fingers with yours, leading you off the path and through the trees, back toward the street. His thumb gently stroked yours and your chest felt light. At the tree of his choice, he let go of your hand and put the basket down. The leaves crunched under your shoes as you carefully stepped around fallen apples. You crouched down to pick one up, then Joel said, “better from the tree.”

“What do you do with the ones on the ground?”

“Perfect for cider.” Joel found a good looking apple on a branch. “For apple juice, you want one that comes off after a quarter turn.”

He was about to turn the apple, but something caught his eye on the tree.

“Would ya look at that. . .” He let go of the apple and grabbed your hand. “C’mon,” he said excitedly and pulled you to the other side of the tree. He pulled down a branch that didn’t have any apples and you followed his eyes to a flower.

“Li’l apple blossom,” he muttered. “Gorgeous.”

“Is it rare?” you asked.

“This time of year? On a tree with ripe apples? It sure is.” He reached for the flower.

“Why’s it there?”

“Well, I reckon sometimes they bloom late.” He stroked the petals, entranced. “And sometimes, it turns out that’s for a reason.” He plucked the flower and closed his eyes as he brought it to his nose, his chest expanding with a long, deep breath through his nostrils. “I think this one’s just for you.”

He stepped closer, offering it for you to smell. The velvet petals brushed your nose as you breathed in the sweetest, most beautiful scent. Joel watched you enjoy the fragrance, then gently nudged the cap off your head and it landed softly behind you. You looked into his eyes and saw a world of affection.

He tucked the flower behind your ear, then cradled your head and wrapped his other arm around you, bringing your body into his. You were anxious for him to kiss you again, unsure if you were doing it right. He was so good at it. His lips tenderly met yours, and your nerves washed away. After a few seconds, he pulled away to look you in the eyes. He kissed you again and his lips became greedier. His arm tightened around you, and his tongue slowly claimed every part of your mouth. He softly moaned into you as his hand drifted from your back to your ass, pulling your pelvis into him. You felt him harden against your body, sending a swarm of butterflies to your core.

He broke away from your lips to kiss the hollow of your neck, then your neckline. He nuzzled his nose between your breasts, overwhelming your body with desire. His hands scanned your back and sides as he began to crouch down. He kissed you through your shirt, between your breasts. He kissed you over your belly button, then just above your pants. He held onto your ass and knelt down on the ground to kiss the front of your pants, making you weak in the knees.

He was always so neatly dressed. How desperate he must have been to get his jeans dirty. He really couldn’t help himself, and that turned you on. He laid open mouth kisses all around your zipper, his nose and strong lips nudging your special place through the denim. You could even feel his tongue. A pool was forming in your panties. You sighed and he tore his head away. He looked up at you, captivated. “You’re so beautiful, peaches.”

He curled the fingers of each hand into your waistband and slowly started to unbutton your pants.

You had been so busy preparing to see Joel’s privates that you forgot to worry about showing your own. The way he looked up at you so hungrily, you hated to stop him, but he recognized the hesitation in your face.

“What’s the matter, baby?”

“I’ve never–no one’s ever–”

“No one’s ever seen you?”

You swallowed and looked down and away.

“You’re beautiful, peaches. . . every part of you.” He unzipped your pants slowly and his thumb dragged lightly over your panties as he pulled it down. “Every part.”

“I, um.” He froze and moved his hands to your sides, listening. You continued, “I never saw— I guess I don’t know if I’m . . . normal.”

He planted a kiss on the exposed sliver of your panties.

“There’s no normal, darlin’. . .I promise. They’re all different, very different. . . Different and beautiful. But especially yours, I just know it.”

“Plus. . .” You looked away again. “I don’t shave.”

“I know, darlin’,” he said. “And I’m glad. . . ‘cause I want every part of you just how you are.”

With that, you were convinced. He began to gently take down your pants, being careful not to bring your panties with them.

But then you both heard the unmistakeable sound of a vehicle coming down the street. It was such a rare occurrence that Joel stopped what he was doing and you both looked in that direction. Joel stood up and you watched him adjust the bulge in his jeans while his eyes narrowed toward the street.

“Damnit,” he whispered as Abe’s truck came into view. Your face lit up. You hadn’t seen anyone besides Joel since Bill and Frank left. Joel didn’t seem as happy about the visitor, but it was understandable given the interruption. “Do you wanna wait,” he started to ask you, but you were already zipping up and ready to walk with him.

“I wanna say hi,” you said.

“Okay, darlin’.” He kissed your head. As you and Joel walked toward the house, Abe came around back. Abe called out your name in surprise.

“Abe!” you called back.

When you got close, he opened his arms for a hug and you gave him one. You didn’t even know Abe that well, but you were so happy to see anyone. When you looked back at Joel, he was scowling. You swallowed, wondering if the hug bothered him.

But, did Joel ever look happy? Only when you were in his arms or about to be. Your heart fluttered as you realized it.

Abe talked to you for a minute. He asked how you were holding up and if it was spooky being alone. You admitted the noises at night were bothering you. Abe said it was probably raccoons and that he could swing by with some traps the next day. He was supposed to come by and check the security footage anyway. He promised Bill he’d look at the perimeter footage to make sure no one dangerous was showing up to the compound. You could have done it yourself, too, but Bill didn’t want to overwhelm you.

Joel shifted uncomfortably on his feet and Abe turned his attention to him. “How’s the harvest this year?”

“One of the best, I reckon.”

“That so? Got any cobbler for me?”

“Not today. Got some juice and cider, though.”

“Ooh, cider.”

“You got it.” Joel went inside and came back out with a jar. “C’mon, I’ll walk you to your truck.”

You said goodbye to Abe and he said “See ya soon.”

After a couple of minutes, you heard a car door open and shut. When Joel came back, he was quiet. Abe’s truck started and drove away. Joel put his hands on his hips and looked down at the dirt on his knee. “I’ve got some traps too, ya know. . .” He seemed wounded.

“Of course you do,” you said. “I bet you have everything I need.” It was sweet how he wanted you to need him, not Abe.

You wrapped your arms around him and watched the hurt leave his face.

“Tell ya what,” he said. “Why don’t we both get cleaned up and I’ll come over. We can make dinner together and do the juice another day.”

“Okay.” You were a little disappointed.

“We can drink wine instead tonight, how’s that?” You liked that idea. He didn’t drink with you the first time.

You put on a soft, roomy knee length skirt and pretty top before Joel came over. He had on a new pair of jeans. You made dinner together. He helped pick out a wine, and for the first time, you took a full glass. Maybe more than a full glass, based on the pours you normally saw from Bill and Frank. When you finished eating and were sipping on the rest of your wine, Joel reached out and touched your hand. You smiled shyly at him. The sun was going down outside.

You couldn’t put your finger on the way he was looking at you. It wasn’t the affection you saw earlier. It was something more. Like he wanted to consume you, make you part of him. And every sip of wine, you could feel it happening. You saw little molecules of yourself drifting over, getting sucked into the black holes of his eyes or caught in the flannel of his shirt. It was preferable to being consumed by grief or fear.

Joel built a fire while you cleaned the dishes. Then, you met him in the living room. Before you could sit down on the sofa, he intercepted you, wrapping his arms lazily under yours. He crossed his wrists at your lower back for a close hug that turned into his hands on your ass. His hands felt even better through the thin fabric of your skirt. He held your ass cheeks in the palms of his hand and a soft grunt escaped him as he pulled you into his body. You felt his cock harden in his pants, bringing with it a pool in your panties.

He inhaled your scent. He let go of your ass and took both your hands in his. He wet his lips as he looked at you and walked backwards slowly, bringing you with him, until he reached the sofa and sat down.

“‘C’mere, gorgeous," he said, lightly brushing your hands with his thumbs.

It dawned on you that you were supposed to sit in his lap.

“Oh, Joel, I dunno . . .” Your face got hot and you looked down and away as he shamelessly adjusted himself.

“It's okay, baby. C’mere just a minute. . . Let’s just see if we like what we feel. . . that’s all. Whatever you want ‘n that’s all.”

Whatever he had in mind, if you could stop at any moment, it was hard to argue with that. He let go of you then hooked his hands around the backs of your knees, lightly skimming up your hamstrings, then gently pulled and you stepped forward. At his urging, you hesitantly straddled him, staying back toward his knees at first, your skirt spread over both of you.

He took a deep breath and his rough, massive hands slid under your skirt and up your naked thighs as he sat up to meet your face with his. He kissed you softly at first, then began to slowly devour your mouth with his. He held the back of your head as one hand found your ass again and kneaded a cheek. As the kiss heated up, he gently pulled you down all the way into his lap. You came to rest on his hard package, greeted by a lift of his hips and a stab of desire.

He rolled his hips rhythmically as he kissed you, lifting you an inch or two each time, like riding a wave. He steered your ass and hips, guiding you to grind back against him. Ohh, it felt good.

You did that for a while, not talking, and at some point, your hips began to move a little on their own, seeking that delicious pressure.

“That’s it, baby. Just like that.”

You felt something begin to build inside you. He studied your face, and he saw it too.

“You feel that, baby?”

Oh, you felt it. Joel latched onto your neck. A moan fell out of your mouth and into his hair while his beard tickled you and the suction made your whole body weak.

“Ever had an orgasm, darlin'?” he asked over your shoulder.

He slowed his hips to talk, but never stopped them completely. He pulled back to look at your face.

“I –” you started to say.

“I reckon not, then. That's ok, darlin', it'll happen."

“Only in my sleep.”

“Good, good.” You kept riding the wave of his hips. “That’s your body takin’ care of you. It’s good for you." He looked at you like he was starving. He breathed heavily. "Gonna take this belt off, k?”

He reached under your skirt to his belt. He unbuckled and swiftly removed it, then his hands found your hips and he resumed his rhythm. “That better, baby?”

You nodded, captivated by the lust in his eyes. You could feel it gathering in your core like a storm.

“Wanna feel me without my pants?”

“I dunno,” you hesitated. Your clit throbbed.

“I got shorts on,” he reassured you, but you didn't come around yet.

“That’s okay darlin', we'll do whatever you want,” he said. He looked into your eyes and kissed you deeply, one hand guiding your hips. As his lips released your mouth, you felt a rush of need. “Whatever you want, baby,” he said.

"Okay, your shorts" you said, and dismounted him. You put your elbow against the back of the sofa and rested your head in your hand, admiring him. The way his biceps stretched his flannel. His muscular neck. His hair falling out of place. His patchy beard and the flecks of silver caught by the fire light. His thighs as his jeans came down.

"C'mere darlin'," he said and helped you back onto him. Your moist panties met the stiffness in his boxers and your mouth fell open. The tension thundered in your core.

"Yeah, that's it, baby," he said. He gradually sped up the rhythm of his hips. "Go on, let your hips go."

You throbbed madly and your arousal began to take over. "It's ok, go on," he said. "s'posed to let'em move." You rolled your hips down for more contact and were rewarded with an immediate rush of pleasure. "Mmmm, just like that, baby."

He let you drive the rhythm for a little bit, and you felt it getting closer and closer, that release that evaded you all your waking life. He saw it on your face, too.

"Ok baby, trust me for a minute."

You nodded. He slipped a thumb inside your panties. He took a deep breath, then exhaled, "yeah," when he felt your ample wetness. He began to stroke your clit.

Then he took out his stiff cock, and the sight alone almost sent you. The sight of his hand around it took your breath away. Then, under your skirt, he nestled it against your panties, right up against your clit, and you rolled into him and felt yourself twitch and throb.

"That's it, baby, c'mon."

You were so close, then you started having doubts. You didn't want to fail in front of him.

"I can't," you whined.

"Yeah you can, darlin'," he said. "Stay with me, it's okay, you're okay."

He lifted his hips in short, fast bursts, bouncing you on his cock. "I got you, baby." Ohh, he was hard.

Your face screwed up and you felt like you might burst.

“Good girl,” he said.

Finally, the tension burst and seized your whole body before it released. “I got you, baby.” You clenched around nothing, and your poor neglected clit pulsed against his hard cock as you rode massive waves. “Doing great, baby.” Your body jerked, and he wrapped his arms around you and slowed his rhythm, “Doing great.” Your eyes welled up in tears and you gasped for breath as your climax waned and you collapsed into him.

"You're okay, baby. You're okay." He slowly rolled his hips while you caught your breath. Then he gently nudged you back, making space to slip his flattened fingers into your panties to gather some lube for himself. He vocally exhaled as his digits gently dragged along your seam. He brought your slick to his cock and began to stroke himself.

As he pleasured himself, his other hand went into your panties, then he sucked his fingers. "Mmm," he said, still stroking himself.

Your eyes were wide as you looked down at his cock.

"First one you've seen?"

You swallowed and nodded almost imperceptibly.

"Like it?"

One side of your mouth crept up as you looked at him.

"It's ok, darlin, you're s'posed to." His breath deepened. “And I know I’ll like what you’ve got, too. Show me, darlin’.”

His free hand moved your skirt out of the way and he looked at your panties hungrily.

“Just a peek, baby.” His thumb tugged at the soaked crotch of your panties.

“Okay,” you said and tilted your hips. He pulled it to the side. He inhaled sharply through his nose, and stared at your pussy, hypnotized. He ran his thumb up and down your slick folds. “You’re perfect. . .so perfect. . .”

You felt like you could cry at those words.

He looked you in the eyes, then let your panties go.

"I wanna be inside you so bad, baby'," he groaned. And you wanted him inside you, too.

The pace of his strokes quickened. "It's okay, baby, we'll get there." Agony spread across his face, then he leaned back and erupted with a groan. You watched his cum spill into his hand.

He caught his breath, then after he was cleaned up, he came back and took you in his arms.

You both fell asleep, and when you woke up, you sat up to look at the clock, which woke Joel up, too. The fire had burned out.

“It’s after midnight,” you said.

He yawned and stretched, then asked, "want me to tuck you in?"

You felt a little bad having him walk home at that hour. If it were you, you’d be terrified. But you still told him, "Not tonight."

He picked up his jeans and started pulling them on. He tucked in his shirt before zipping up. "Not tonight. . . alright, darlin'." He smiled as he put his belt back on. Then he kissed you good night.

As soon as Joel left, a heaviness fell over the house. You became so aware of the space around you, the space around the house, around the community. The emptiness that was too empty to truly be empty. There was something else there. You peeked outside and watched the shadows of branches sway under the white moon. You regretted letting him go. You still could have gone out to catch him if you wanted, but something held you back. “Not tonight.”

I'd guess 1-2 weeks for the next one.

Main tag list is full but you can comment to get on the reblog tag list.

Thank you so much for reading and engaging!

Ty @dark-scape for letting me talk about him all the time and test out my plans

All joel: @ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea @evyiione @xdaddysprincessxx @queerly-anxious @chernayawidow @ambassadortotrilliusprime @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @jasminespringtime @romanarose @fandomsfallnomore @djarinxore @lokanda @blackvelveteen1339 @manazo @wolvesandvampires @taeslarityy @str84pedro

Lincoln: @fan-fiction-floozy @ivyblxnde @lhymer1995 @sugarspiceanthrax @isimpforfictionalmen @zynbsblogg @swedishscumfuck @sadgirlstoohightocare @steveharringtonswh0re @skythighs @aoziety @leeeesahhh @jupitersmoon-cal @peekymoon @dtfawn @pedrosbabygirl @shotgun-shelby @reader-without-a-story @shewantstoknow @jaxxiepup @yvonneeeee @elvinaa @internetobssesed1234-blog @jbcalway @afterglowsb-tch13 @kamcrazy123

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onlyifyoubadd · 8 months ago

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I'm so fucking nervous for the finale cause of something Andy "loose lips" lincoln joked about during one of the interviews....I'm hoping he was just joking rather than actually giving a spoiler, but idk.....I'm scared man!

it's called "the ones who live" so I'm holding onto that richonne are both the ones who get to live and finally go home!

#I'm scared tho....twdu be fucking with us but I gotta trust danai honestly!#just had to get this worry outta my head #richonne #the ones who live

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specter319 · 1 year ago

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𝗢𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡: 𝗦𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗟 THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM

Authors Note: It's been 15 hours, 15. And for those that know what happens, do not comment on this post, as I will delete and block stated users who place it on here, I am very specifically waiting until the 12th of November for those who have logged off in their entirety to not be spoiled of anything regarding the new launch. And my thoughts generally, writing-wise on it will be launched on or after November 12. Other than that, for those that know and have played it. [-] Both have plot armor for reasons I can not get into, but ones that I'd much rather happily reveal in time. Enjoy the new post!

GIF by Loonlypaper as well as concept for message Pairing: Damon 'Ninja' West x Kaden Lincoln, Simon 'Ghost' Riley x John 'Soap' MacTavish, Zack 'Nemo' Hayes x Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick. Word Count: 2.1k words no use of y/n eventual relationship establishment, however, Damon and Kaden are married. Summary: In a nation unaccustomed to war, Australia's newly elected government faces a dire crisis when rumours of a biological weapon on home soil, send shockwaves through the Government's defence sector. Dispatching a team of elite operatives to deal with it, the containment goes heads up as they look for other options.

The Black Angel Squad is soon assigned as the situation quickly spirals out of control behind the team's back unknowingly, and to stop a bleeding wound, Task Force 141 is brought in to assist them amid a frantic cabinet meeting of last-minute options and consistent fuck ups, forging an uneasy alliance between two teams. As tensions soar on both ends, questions arise about one thing: Was this the making of a weapon to begin with? Warnings: slow-burn, zombies, canon typical violence associated with Call of Duty, gruesome depictions of death, blood, swearing.

Ao3 Version

[Prev] [Next]

He should’ve had more coffee.

“Hey, lazybones.”

A grumbled groan moved out of the males lips once more as he automatically turned around in his sleep, apparent that in the limited time that he hurried back to bed, it seemed just like moments ago. But instead, it was almost four hours later. A catnap, as Cameron had stated earlier.

“Damon, we are not doing this today, I know you got broken sleep, but you’ve had well over six hours. Out of bed, I need my shopping partner…and my partner.”

He was fighting a loosing battle in knowing his body was well aware of wanting to get up either way as he sighed before he rolled back over and finally sat up, his black hair all a mess. His eyes no longer filled with the same heaviness they once had earlier this morning, but more of a distant look in his eyes. Kaden always found his sleepy state adorable knowing he could barely calculate anything but how to breathe and complain in the morning.

“We find out anything more since last night?” ‘Oh yeah, he wasn’t thinking alright.’ Kaden thought, a small tug to the corner of his lips had the male trying not to laugh at his vulnerable state of broken sleep.

“Nothing other than the coroner has drawn blood and checked over the body, but isn’t allowed to examine them. Other than that, the cop is seemingly fine in his state, bite is apparently inflamed but, nothing else.”

Damon brush past the comment of not being able to examine them before he looked over at Kaden’s smile, tired muscles in his eyes made him look all the more out of it rather than the pure action of squinting as he tried to see what the other was hiding.

“What?” He rasped.

“You look cute with your hair like that.”

“I oughta kill you.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

Damon only gave him a look as the two went their seperate ways, knowing that he was going to take his moment to try and regain the energy he had from the night before he passed out in the bed.

It was through the chugging of three coffees later and a mediocre serving of Special K that the male was finally good enough to go to tolerate the world as he finally hung around Kaden’s office and jingled the keys to let him know he was there.

“Look who’s finally alive.” “Must be dead inside with all those emails you’re answering,” He jeered back.

“Actually just more information on the mission we’ve gotten from earlier this morning. They’ve spoken to the other team, sending over a bunch of former SAS trained soldiers from a task force apparently.”

“SAS soldiers?” Damon asked before he moved into Kaden’s office, quickly turning to look at his computer screen. Rather casually, informing the likes that they have been assigned alongside Task Force 141 to investigate the incident which would be codenamed: Operation Sentinel.

“Who the fuck are Task Force 141?” Damon quizzed as he looked at the screen, even questioning the name of the operation as he looked at the email.

“Don’t know, we’ll find out in a few days when they get here. But right now, we need to do some shopping for the guys, we’ve got a whole list of stuff we need to get,” and then, Kaden went in for a kiss on a stubble filled jaw, Damon slowly looking over at Kaden with a slight smirk. Someone was a little clingy.

“’S matter with you today?”

“Can I not admire my husband for how hot he looks with a black jumper on and how he smells?”

“Alright, we are not doing this here again, I did this once to fulfil your office fantasy, we’re going shopping. Now,” Sometimes, Damon thought, it had honestly felt like they would swap each others thoughts around. And that was one of the scary parts of being married to the love of your life for as long as you had been, when you started to know one another’s thoughts. It became even more so just how easy you could drag them out of that stated mindset of longing they had for each other.

───

Shopping never seemed to be a nightmare on Wednesday’s in the afternoon, barely anyone seemed to be doing their shopping at a time like this, and it left the once crowded weekend days feel like you could finally breathe in a tightly compact place. Save for a certain ankle biter who rammed a trolley into the back of Kaden’s legs.

Damon had an innocent smile on his face as Kaden looked like he was going to reciprocate the movement that caused him to turn around to begin with, had it not been for Damon’s realisation with what aisle they were currently in.

“Are we seriously buying chocolate for that fucker again? That’s the third bar this week,” realising what he’d stated, Damon quickly checked around for any kids before continuing his demeanour, an unspoken rule Damon had thanks to his sailors mouth. “I don’t see the issue.” “That’s usually because you’re away from Zack when he decides to go nuclear and thinks it’s fine to lay his lactose intolerance out on us, get him the cookies instead.” “He doesn’t like the cookies though.” “For the sake of our marriage - please,” Damon dramatically pleaded in addition with puppy eyes, which only Damon knew he could get away with.

“God you are so overdramatic Damon,” A roll of his eyes came to as he put the chocolate back and grabbed the cookies instead “Any complaints, it’ll come back on you.”

“There won’t be, unless he eats the whole packet in one sitting.”

“He probably will,” He brushed off.

“Fuck, you’re right,” Damon realised before he gently grabbed the list out of Kaden’s hands “Alright, next is butter, two bags of rice, spring onions, and a crap tonne of vegetables,” Damon paused in realisation “Are we having rice?”

“Figured given we’re on cooking duty this week we’d do something simple, gotta make enough for four nights so, I decided on rice, given pasta seemingly doesn’t really work as much.”

“Alright, you grab the butter, I’ll go grab the rest of the things needed on the list.”

“Wilco,” Kaden said before he dashed off down the other side of the supermarket.

Eventual time of crossing one another’s paths would lead to the two getting to the checkout as they openly decided to go and serve themselves at the self-serve checkout instead of leaving the hard work to the others. A simple act of kindness in their eyes, and one less person to let what they could do with ease stress out about, and instead, allow them to take a breather for just a moment before another customer came hauling their groceries. Or were ungratefully needed for that one ‘shift’ they never really got paid for.

Knowing that they had finally gotten what they had come for, the pair of them got back in the vehicle as Damon, for once allowed the other male to drive, a sudden surprise to the other, as usually, their would be a complain in trail about it, even if it was the love of his life.

“You’re letting me drive?” Kaden questioned with a confused look on his face.

“Yeah, I figured it was a thanks for last night and this morning.”

“You’re still out of it aren’t you?”

A laugh stifled out of Damon “Yup. It was this morning, too, wasn’t it?” He questioned, that’s what broken sleep did to a man. Threw him right off his perception of time.

Nodding in replied confirmation came from Kaden before he started up the vehicle and made his way out of the parking lot.

───

The rattle of the reusable thick plastic bags had Zack running down the hall as he eagerly awaited the two men to come back into the kitchen with baited breath. As he waited for them to place the bags on the table before he greedily got to what he wanted, he’d been desiring for the past almost twelve hours - chocolate. However, as the zipper came flying around the edges of the bag, opening the flap to it. His face quickly pulled downwards at the sides as he realised it wasn’t a whole chocolate bar, but instead, cookies.

“Alright, which one of you two did this? It’s very funny, cookies instead of a chocolate bar,” Zack stated, confused as he pulled at the box, maybe it was just a little prank and they had a lot of chocolate bars inside, shaking it didn’t seem to resolute much hope within him though. The unbroken seal, an unknown answer to Zack’s logic, would’ve also flown open given how hard he’d shaken it just seconds ago.

“Blame Damon,” Kaden raised his hands as he moved away from the mess, pulling the bag towards him and grabbing what was needed for what would be a giant serving of tonights dinner. Knowing Damon would come to help him once he was done bickering with the other male.

Damon only looked back at him as Kaden avoided his gaze like he was on the other side of a glass pane to his husband, all the while, Zack was burning daggers into Damon’s skull as the other man finally looked back at him.

“You’re sick,” Zack accused.

“Look, I’m not buying forty dollars worth of chocolate bars just so you can treat the cap and I like Meg from Family Guy. The only time I will suffer through it is if I buy you a chocolate cake, even then,” Damon exaggerated.

“I’m not lactose intolerant!”

“Like hell you aren’t,” Damon quickly witted back. “They’re worse than mine. Kaden back me up here.”

Kaden immediately broke out into a song, humming as he placed the rice down onto the table.

“Quite the supportive husband,” Damon gestured, receiving a smirk from the other.

“Obviously your backup thinks otherwise,” Zack stated before someone else walked into the room, Cameron.

“Alright you two, what’s going on here?” The captain decided to bite at the bickering between the two and Damon immediately explained, giving no room for Zack to try and argue his case.

“I gave Zack cookies instead of a whole chocolate bar today,” Damon said as he looked over at him. Cameron looked at him as if he were insane, but a saviour all at the same time, it was the one night they were playing Uno that Cameron flashed back to that moment he will never forget, he swears by the book Zack had done something more than just farting. And Damon had sworn the opposite, that he’d only done exactly that.

“I’m giving you a promotion after this,” sarcasm, of course given Damon’s last stance on being offered it. But Damon tried not to laugh at the subtle gratitude.

“He’ll go through it within a sitting anyway.”

“Oh come on, not you, Captain,” Zack complained

“Damon was right to, I think I lost my smell that night, never been able to smell the petrichor since,” Cameron laughed before he looked over at Kaden, he was on cooking duty tonight, and he was glad he was getting right to it, especially with the news that had developed. “Complaints aside, we’ve got some good news, and bad news.”

“That we won’t smell death anymore?” Damon chuckled as he got a glare from Zack. Though they all knew he wasn’t going to do anything, one of them always became the butt of some joke. It was the way they operated.

“No, we have an operational unit on the way labeled as Task Force 141, they’re sending out four of their men to help investigate this case which we still haven’t gotten any update on since early this morning, been sitting and waiting for one but, you know how emails go. Bad news however, news crews have gotten word about it - and they will not stop until they have answers.”

“You’d think with the budget they have, an email would be simple enough to do,” Zack retorted.

“Yes, well, that’s not the case, so we’re headed out to Melbourne Airport at 0700 hours to pick them up from a domestic flight and then we’ll be headed out to Katherine, should be there by at least by 1300 hours.”

“Can you just use normal time?” Damon groaned before he sighed - though he understood it very well, he often chose to speak to other teammates by using the AM and PM format much rather than military time.

“You know the rules, Damon.”

“Yes Captain.”

“Any questions?”

“Yeah,” Kaden asked as he chewed on a mushroom head. “Why haven’t we gotten any emails or intel back from the Departments yet about the reports?”

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