#looney tune merc

[whimsica]

"WHo would win the Overwatch heroes or the TF2 mercs ?" this is like asking who would win between the Avengers and the Looney Tunes.

[artoatsblog]

My favorite type of sfm's are the ones that have the mercs in a completely different time period and/or setting but have the mercs themselves act 100% in character.

You can have soldier in a David lynch movie, but he's still going to call medic a hippie for all the body horror he made him go through, immediately followed by medic complementing him on what great Kiddys he has.

Their such silly little guys they somehow manage to fundamentally keep themselves the same even when their world doesn't, so maybe it's just you who can't handle all the realty shifting because you're not as cool as us lol.

[sepublic]

I honestly think the TF2 mercs have become the kind of timeless, classic characters that you can place into any role or situation as you please, like Popeye, Tom and Jerry, Mickey Mouse, etc. Emesis Blue is like if someone made a horror movie starring the Muppets and played it completely straight the whole way through. They’re the Looney Tunes of our generation.

[kc5rings]

I’m looking forward to Path of Life but I genuinely hope in the future we get something like Grani and the Knights Treasure again

There’s a certain humor/horror to any of the Hunters (and Skadi especially) placed in situations involving Normal Dudes that I really miss

Any time I think about Skadi smashing a hole in the side of a mountain when the actual cave entrance is like ten feet away I have a fit, it’s so looney tunes but also clearly terrifying to the mercs she’s moving through

Shoutout again to Grani for blocking a casual swipe from Skadi’s sword and only almost breaking both her arms

[senkothesquirrel02]

My friend and I are creating a fanfic and we’d like some advice.

So I saw a while ago the meme about the smallest dragon with 1 single coin as a hoard as well as the tumblr story about it and I thought……….. why not make it ghoap? We made it a fantasy incorporated with humans (not to be mistaken as a hybrid au, this is full on supernatural au with some humans) It kinda has been an add/adhd brainrot story where we just indulged the chaos. By no means are my friend and I done writing yet and we will hopefully post on AO3. We won’t spoil the plot yet. (Yes it’s brainrot and hyper focusing but it’s fun) Also my friend told me to say I’m the one responsible for angst bits.

Here’s what we have so far for stuff/memes we added, advice/ contribution of memes or ideas greatly appreciated:

Soap and Ghost povs

Absolutely no idea how military works so working with idea of modern knights/bounty hunters

COD MW (2022) full crew including Farrah/Alex from their raid mission (briefly mentions a ValeriaXGraves crackship…….. I blame Glitch for the explanation of it to which it sounds very real #samesnake)

Cod zombies element 115 and Aether and Mr. Peeks

MW3 ‘23: only using Price and Sheppard end credit (‘23 canon does not exist)

Codm lore: only the tointine/couteau with the armor of Gideon, mention of kilo mythic, Templar and ghosts dynamic, added Sophia, Dame but playing with the fact she’s crazy and in Tontine (she tried raising Sophia to be her predecessor but there was hints in lore her training was very brutal like Damian Wayne’s but she’d possibly allow the shit the Tontine was doing like experiments), and tempest, also used the bit about Sophia working as Makarov protege. No mention of Shepard but will use basis of what happened in Winter War/Final Snow comics between Ghost and Temp as an “eye for eye” scenario, not trying to save Russian from merc sent after him— clearing up loose ends for Shepard)

With addition of mythic Sophia it kinda leaves plot idea of her 💀 then coming back due to the Valkyrie design.

COD Ghost comics (Codm is using cannon of 09 MW for ghosts character/most of lore) Mama Riley but she’s a dragon trapped by human Dad Riley thanks to enchanted item/trickery (yes we fixed the plot hole so she’s still seen as a good mom)

Mama Riley also becomes a patron of the lost and lonely children in the after life and beats the shit out of Dad Riley in afterlife (Sophia accidentally gets adopted)

Burnette ghost

MW ‘09 (using Roach, elements of price in gulag, Makarov being a🧚‍♂️)

Roach being embodiment of chaos

Mention of DC Comics, more specifically Damian Wayne and Talia Al Ghul

Marvel Deadpool/Spiderman dynamic (only for comedic relief and multiversal stupidity),bloodstone family, and mysterium

Looney Tunes types stilupidity (Wile E. coyote like traps)

Arcane aesthetic (steampunk/elegance from Piltover but wild magic is more accepted and grown wild in plants, small places/ towns more medival setup) and Vander (pre his first💀) with the bar

Mythology from Norse, Celtic, Dutch, Greek, Egyptian, and some D&D influences for creatures

Use of Spanish, French, Gaelic (might not be best translation)

NikPrice

GhostSoap

AleRudy

FarrahAlex

Dragon Ghost (crow mentality for shiny but coin is main part of hoard) Elf Soap (gets adopted by large creatures *cough* owlbear *cough* and has bad luck and Arson/pyromaniac)

Dragon Ghost Nik Price can shift to small version dragon, human, or large sized dragons (ghost likes being small 90% of time but price makes him be human…… this leads to soap thinking ghosts a baby) while in small dragon can’t talk in “human” tongue so squeaks (will have inner monologue tho found in italics)

HC soap would be friends with reaper (or Donn Celtic god of death) and they’d be like “you’re not supposed to be dead, stay alive for one consecutive month please!” And soap will try to befriend every creature (leads to trouble)

Adding Atlantis (ghost would be a sea/land *atlantian* dragon because from research says the island supposedly was directly between Canada and uk part of Atlantic) as well as the utopia paradise of Avalon and hopefully a mythological citadel if I can find one (let me know if y’all know one, hopefully same idea as the Atlantis or Avalon, might make one linked to dragons or shadowrealm idk)

Dragon Nik/Price (Nik Batman and robin adopts Ghost. Price begrudgingly agrees)

Fae Laswell (no one screws with her)

Fae Gaz

Eldritch Roach (yes he will hide in vents, no one knows he eldritch besides Laswell, has shadow abilities due to ‘09, will be feral gremlin)

Do not know what to put AleRudy as or Farrah Alex (advice please)

Dame as human Witch

Temp/Sophia werewolves (using the idea of being able to tell who is shifter by a certain eye color, can’t remember who wrote that but it’s from tumblr

No smut but will have slow burn/makeout (accidentally made a steamy scene during Roba time but I won’t say where)

Will have angst (mostly directed to ghost, mentions of time with Roba including *that* Christmas, adding how he was hunted by monster hunters and being sold out on op then seperated from 141, being used in ritual by rusalka, and other bits) and heavy gore

Heavy swearing also

Flashback of memories (good and angst ones)

4th wall breaks (both are call outs)

D&D style side quests/tasks

Anyone saw despicable me movie where one minion drank something and turned into glow stick? Using that idea but it’s berries and ghost is impromptu glow stick

Friends idea “hear me out, bow with bell on small dragon ghost”

“He’s 7 he can’t drink” “what am I supposed to do with him?!”

Accents leading to mispronounced name (ghost to cost for soap)

Pavlov’s ghost in to “sitting pretty” at the sound of breagha when in tiny dragon form…….can and has happened when human(Gaelic for pretty)

Idea of a tiny predator being able to bring down big animal, like 10x their size (from black footed sand cat hunting style)

Tiny dragon scruffing (yes acting exactly like kitten)

“Stop telling everyone I’m dead!” (Pertaining to soap taking a most likely fatal contract from a drunk promising big payout and everyone presumes he’s dead and the drunks being yelled at because of it)

Soap sketching Ghost whenever possible

Garlic bread goblin meme of ARSON!!

Personal hc of Sophia and ghost having sibling dynamic after she stops trying to kill ghost for vengeance. Sophia being chaotic as well (she and roach might become friends…. Who knows).

“My death was greatly exaggerated”—Sophia (and kinda Templar)

Community hc of ghost and Farrah having sibling energy

“Welcome to the shit fuck hell festival.” Quote from a fanfic

“I plead the fifth” meme (not the song, the one of them accidentally admit saying they did something stupid and backpedaling)

“Why are you here? Five words or less” (something along the lines of) “out. For. A. Walk. Bitch.”

Ghost Sophia bonding over their traumas. Implied mention of Farrah and Ghost had bonded over their traumas

Literally everyone wants to beat the shit out of Dame (if you know Codm lore you’ll know why)

Gave Sophia the call sign rouge because in the contract business (and family tradition) they need call signs

Shadow company setting bounties on Soap (let’s just say soap blew up their complex on an op)

Working with idea for supernatural entities having fast regeneration and only being sent to limbo when receiving fatal injury so body can properly heal

Oh no he’s hot turns to “your telling me this dragon was a fucking 10 all along but none of you told me? I was carrying a damned 10 and treating him like a baby?!!!”

“I’m just saying the Canadians were onto something with the Geneva checklist—”—Nik as it pertains to a monster hunter who caught Ghost

[“Laswell, he was going to sell it(whelp) to Sinombre. If we use those tactics we can get the name of Sinombre!”—Nik

“As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm. That would cause the UN to be hounding us and I don’t need that headache. Hey, PRICE DON'T YOU DARE USE THAT CAR BATTERY!”—Laswell

“But Laswell…….” —Price

“Just because the gulag used it on you doesn’t mean you do it to other people!!”—Laswell

“But-”—Price

“Where’d you even get the battery— did you take it out of my car?”—Laswell

“No, fine I’ll return it later.”—Price

“Better do it.”—Laswell] differing ideas for interrogation (‘09 iykyk)

Laswell being the only one to understand tiny dragon squeak/draconic besides said dragons

Idea of tiny dragon ghost being constantly yeeted

Air jail (oil lamp for tiny dragonghost when he acts like spicy little shit)

HC: They need to hide coffee from ghost or the little shit will be like hammy the squirrel from over the edge or twitchy for hoodwinked

“I can’t mansplain, manipulate, or make wife my way out of this……… Manslaughter it is.” —Nik or Ghost

[“What’s that small wood thing in the shape of a bag pipe?”

“An ocarina Johnny?”

“Oh! You mean the instrument that little elf guy plays in Zelda? What’s his name, Jerry or buddy?”

“It’s Link you uncultured swine. Never dis legend of Zelda again or ill sick Demise’s curse on your ass.” Ghost having too much knowledge about video games]

[tf2incorrectquotes]

Team Fortress 2 headcanons #35:

All the RED mercs and BLU mercs are actually pretty chill with each other when off-the-clock. BLU!Soldier and RED!Demoman are just the most open about it.

The second the end of the match is announced, most will stop even mid-finishing move because it's not like their stingy employers are gonna pay them for overtime. Despite the taunts and trash talk during the fight, there is no true animosity between the teams because they are all just trying to get by working for petty gajillionaires with more money than sense, and the Respawn Machine undoes any of the physical damage anyway. The worst it gets between them is a "grrr we'll get ya next time!"

Think Sam and Ralph from Looney Tunes, but bloodier.

[wtfgaylittlezooid]

Ballista I love you.

And because hes my second favorite of the mercs this comes with a few headcanons:

He runs on cartoon logic. He became a mercenary because killing and violence to him is the equivalent of a really good looney tunes gag-- the more extreme the better. Yes, he knows its wrong. No, he doesn't care. He can also shapeshift just like in canon ofc, kinda like the Warden from Superjail.

And yes, he does have hammerspace.

[iravaid]

i mean this in thee most slash jay way possible but what was in the water the past year to make everyone like this about graves. and also can i have some

If you're asking about the Graves Yaoi Prophecy, that was all me and my undiagnosed neurological condition.

If you're asking why cod of duty girlies were charmed by Graves post-MW2, I would reason to say that Warren Kole's performance as him really sells the character.

His weird little zoolander smoulder during 'your men have been... detained' is so funny to me. Again, his VA's performance turns a character that was otherwise a forgettable 'twist' villain into something that's so funny when viewed out of context:

His name is Philip Graves. Fill Graves. Are you fucking kidding me. He's a cringey girlfailure that lost a tank in a knifefight. But that's okay because he never was in the tank to begin with, of course. duh. He is this vexing, looney tunes contrast to the other more 'serious' villains (Valeria, Makarov, that guy from MW1). His Shadows are cannonfodder that get conveniently killed at every opportunity and yet he still goes about acting like they're anything more than walmart brand mercs. The MW3 trailer oddly fixates on his fertile gyrating hips as he walks through the heli. Everybody hates his entire septic pussy with a burning fucking passion and he knows it. Farah, somehow and for some reason, thinks he's the most special little handbag dog and watches out for hawks on his account. He out-snakes Shepherd by stabbing him in the back at the last moment, arguably the only enjoyable moment from MW3.

He's blond. He's texan. He will never fucking die. God bless america.

[lasagoofs]

A small but important question: Portal or TF2?

(As someone who enjoys both.)

Portal for the story, tf2 for the characters. Don't get me wrong, I love love love glados, but the mercs are just like looney tunes that you can stick into any scenario

(I agree, I also enjoy both)

[fairytale-poll]

LOSER'S BRACKET SEMI FINALS! MATCH 1 OUT OF 2

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Little Red Riding Hooded Mercenary

General Propaganda:

come on just look at her shes so fucking cool

SHES SOOOOOOOO FUCKING COOOOLL ok so like. Lobotomy Corporation takes place in an SCP type facility where a bunch of abnormalities are living. She is one of them. She is a mostly undying humanoid creature that lives for the sole sake of hunting down the Big And Will Be Bad Wolf. She lives in your facility and will BREAK OUT of her containment if she feels that the wolf is near (or if too many people are dying). You can also hire her to assist you in taking down other abnormalities, and she's actually super good at it. And her outfit is just so sooo sick? She's so cool. Please play Lobotomy Corporation it goes on sale for like $7 every Steam Sale

She's red riding hood if red riding hood had a gun. Also she kisses women

Monster based on human subconscious aka an Abnormality based on the story of Little Red Riding Hood (duh). In this story, she was mauled by the wolf (Big And Might Be Bad Wolf) who is based on all fairy tale wolf villains. Little Red then got to work plotting her revenge and making Bloodborne-esque gear for herself and the two Abnos are locked in eternal combat of hatred for one another

She's literally the coolest, just look at her. For people who might not be so familiar with her: She's one of the abnormalities that remain locked in the Lobotomy Corporation. Her past is somewhat unclear, but she has some horrid scars on her face due to the Big Bad Wolf and she swore vengeance upon him because of that incident. This lead her to become a mercenary and she looks 1000% scarier and more badass than the wolf lol. Also, asides from the fact that she may kill half of your team if she escapes containment, she is quite chill and will even help you take care of your problems if you pay her.

little red riding hood but consumed by vengeance to the point of becoming an anomalous creature hellbent on completing her eternal battle with the wolf. intense desire for revenge. baller as fuck design. will help you kill other escaping abnormalities but you gotta pay her to do it. gets pissed off every time someone escapes containment except for that one annoying bird for absolutely no discernible reason. if you let her kill the wolf she gives you bonuses but if someone else kills the wolf she goes fucking bananas. truly an inspired feral creature of a woman.

Go girl!!! We love your unrestrained violence!

She is literally the absolute coolest!!! I mean, just look at her design! Everything about it screams fucking cool! Not to mention that her story has themes of vengeance, rage, and grief!!! And Lobotomy corporation is just the fucking best and soooooo underrated.

She's starting to fall behind so GO ON AND VOTE MERC WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR! (and buy Lobotomy Corp on steam it's not even that expensive!)

Vote for Riding Hooded Mercenary she's an Abnormality serving as a hired merc that means shes a hunter of her own kind and she WILL chase them to the ends of earth lest she dies herself or knows that damn Wolf is nearby. The cursor for sending hits on something is a wanted poster. She's WAW-classed too, a step below the most dangerous category for her ilk. she shares the class with things such as insane-ass magical girls, an eyeless flower horse turns people into wisteria gardens, fucked up and evil Little Prince, a bird judge that hangs its victims, the now-animate poisoned apple that killed Snow White, and of course the Wolf itself.

Loser's Bracket Propaganda:

little red wouldve gone so so hard if she wasnt against ylfa immediately… victory for our mercenary gal.

Riding Hooded Merc is a bonafide baddie & professional

She;s so fucking cool. almost got murdered by the wolf (also in lobcorp by the way) and she wants revenge so bad. cool as hell mercenary. also just look at her come on

I feel that they all deserve a bit more recognition as just about every Little Red Riding Hood is remembered for their story, but not their character. And I believe that the few I selected are truly well rounded characters, and amazing takes on who the character is.

the Lobotomy Corp one I know nothing about but who has a sick design (I also want the fans of this one to have a win because I liked watching the first round because of them)

Bugs Bunny

General Propaganda:

So the story is that the Three Little Pigs sell Bugs their straw and wood houses, the Big Bad Wolf blows them down, and Bugs decides to get revenge - by dressing himself up as Little Red Riding Hood, getting the Wolf to play his part in that story, and then messing with him as only Bugs can. Here's the video if you've never seen it: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6vk41x

Bugs Bunny is an icon and he was so good for his role in this short. When he and the wolf realized they could work together against the pigs... oh my God. Come on Tumblr, you have to admit they had a little gay tension between them. Besides, at the end, when the brick house comes down and the wolf, so surprised and proud of himself exclaims "I did it!" and then it pans over to Bugs with the bomb and he slyly adds "We did it!" communist Bugs canon.

I love Bugs but badass little girls with the personality of a gruff action heroes are everything to 12 year old girls.

Loser's Bracket Propaganda:

Bugs Bunny winning would just be really funny

[lunarsilkscreen]

The two Marvel Multi-verses

There are two main marvel multi-verses in all of marvel-dom. Well, three is you count the one where the marvel creators are literally the gods of creation.

The third one usually becomes something like the TVA (Television Authority){I mean Time Verification [Author]ity} yes, it's literally a joke between MCU and MFU {MarvFlix Universe, which is Marvel that isn't meant to be in Cinema}

But, it's typically because it's an Aid to the second main Marvel Universe; the Comedy.

This is something like Adam Wests bataman, or Batman the brave and the bold. Where it's sometimes serious, but mostly to drive the plot forward. Overall; nothing about it is serious.

This is where Deadpool shine. This middle ground between Looney Tunes and Real Life. "Who framed Roger Rabbit" style of grit.

It includes most of the characters that nobody ever takes seriously. Like Modok and Howard the Duck. (Not to be Confused with Howard the Stark)

The entire point of this universe is to take it to its logical absurdity.

Which contrasts the Main Multiverse; The Serious-Verse. Where comedy serves to make the content more palatable.

It's a stark contrast and the two don't often meet, but when they do; it usually causes any of the interactions to become non-cannon; or forced into the absurdverse.

A more accessible example would be any of the "Un-sets" of Magic the Gathering. Where literal joke cards are printed and none of the cards are legal because of their absurdity.

Which were starting to see more mechanics of online and digital variants since the mechanics aren't as absurd or gamebreaking there.

To be Clear; Deadpool from the original MCU and Deadpool 1 are closer to the serious universe.

Deadpool 2+ we can see as definitely being more for the lulz

There are all variants; like the Haller-Verse. Or the universe and potentially entire multi-verse reserved for David Haller and his tendency to become the most powerful being, and thus; very alone.

Personally; I would like to see more badass merc with a mouth as opposed to demigod-pool. But I also think it's funny they gave him his own "spider-verse" because of having all the genetic mutations--Including Spiderman's.

It implys being able to contact your alternate selves is a mutant power in its own right, but it's borderline... absurd territory.

It's these two multiverses that create a lot of tension in the fandom as well. Which powers are canon? Which stories are canon? And to which universe? Let alone: which multiverse?

Because; depending on which universe or multiverse, some of them actually help certain superheroes, and they don't get that benefit in other universes (or multiverses)

But they would if they figure out how to get to the place that supports their power better. Kinda like Flash with the Speed force; Every iteration of him is always this super fast guy, but *sometimes* he has a whole universe of power at his toe-tips.

I like the serious stories that are more down to earth. The stakes are smaller, and I dislike when one hero gets relegated to two decisions; save or destroy the universe. With the option of "doing nothing" akin to destroying it.

While a lot of fans love the spectacles and these life or death decisions; I want a superhero who asks; "Why?" With the implication that helping can hurt just as much as doing nothing.

A lot of people give Anime a lot of shit for characters that overthink *everything* but there's a reason that they're just as popular as Western media. And why DBZ was one of the first to bridge the gap between the two.

I think it's one of the real avenues not really explored; despite your Iron Fist guy and your Jessica "Not the Hulk" Jones characters. Because they embody a kind of active; Nihilism, or non-action.

"Why do I gotta do it? Because nobody else can." Mentality.

Literally; in a world of superheroes... That statement couldn't be further from the truth.

That's the current age of superhero by the way; That necessity to take up the mantle because some Author-God gave you the power, so you *need* to live the life too.

"you don't have a choice, you don't have free will, the gods decreed it." Despite all evidence to the contrary...

What isn't explored in the media is the idea that "You were given the power sure; but you were given it because of your ability to choose the right way to use it. Not because you need to use it in a certain way"

Instead we have the Serious-Verse. And the Comedic-Verse, which is the logical conclusion to every Serious-Verse. When you take yourself too seriously; it becomes absurd.

What we needed was a Heath Ledger verse. The only Joker to actively tell both Batman and Criminal alike; "You don't need to do this."

Though; he did have that propensity for evil so. Maybe not much.

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

I understand ppls desires for like- dark serious sexy characterizations. there’s a lot of stuff about being in control/giving up control I get it fr. but I personally REALLY love the intimacy of being silly w others and I need to see more of the mercs to have looney toons sex (genuine)

LITERALLYYYY LITERALLY! One of my favorite parts of my lil petplay fic is including Medic and Sniper laughing at themselves bc that's what kink is like sometimes! I also understand people's desire for Dark Serious Sexy fan content, but it's not rlly my bag. I think such a big part of kink for me is realizing that it doesn't HAVE to be "serious" to be worth doing, that I get to do things that are fun and make me happy even if they're "silly" or "cringey." It's called "play" for a reason! So yeah. Put jokes in your tf2 porn. Put Looney Tunes logic in your tf2 porn. Have characters laugh and break roles and ask if everything's okay in the middle of a scene. That's what kink's all about!

[artoatsblog]

My ass cannot wait a week too info dump about TF2 au's

Baby team fortress 2, (Baby Looney tunes except TF2).

Jeremy nicknamed Scout is the trouble maker of the group, he's usually the one who has to learn a lesson at the end of every episode.

Sebastian nicknamed Spy is Scout's half brother (Sebastian is the red spy in the blue Spy is both Scout and red Spy's dad) and thinks he is too good for anyone in anything he encounters he eventually does the silly Goofy stuff like the other Mercs do, Don't worry.

Jane's nickname is soldier and he's a ""tomboy"" (pre-realization trans boy) who loves to get dirty and violents.

No one knows what Pyro's real name is, but they're the nicest kid in the nursery/daycare/foster home/ whatever you want this to be, he sometimes bites one on whatever he can get his hands on despite the fact no one can see her mouth.

Travis nicknamed Demo is a very nice and sensitive kid who ironically enough is best friends with Soldier his ideas are just as awful as his best friends, he just more of a scaredy cat.

Masha nicknamed Heavy looks like an intimidating bully, the keyword being looks because in reality he's polite and responsible and smart :), he's the oldest but that's only by half a month also his the only one who can read.

Dell's nickname is engineer and he's in every man but not a "nice guy" every man, a "cheeky little shit" every man, mostly based off 1990s and 2000s cartoon main characters, he gets along with everyone decently well except Scout.

Ludwig nicknamed Medic is... Well... it's Medic, so, in all seriousness he's not as bad as the OG medic, but he does love to bring dead animal parts into the house. Him and the heavy are best friends, because there Heavy and Medic.

Mick nicknamed Sniper is "the new kid" tm and is extremely shy and doesn't talk to most of the other kids often He's best friends at the other kid no one can understand pyro.

And The administrator is a sweet grandma Who totally doesn't secretly harbor her real self under a facade, no way, despite her nature She does love all of her kids, she also has a niece named Francine Pauling who sometimes comes by to help.

[icy-seal]

"You're not meant to take the tf2 mercs seriously" Just tell me ur boring and can't fathom media more complex than looney tunes lmao 😭

[lunastars21]

IMMA ADVERTISE FOR THE HOOLIGANS RIGHT NOW

TOP 5 REASONS WHY THEY ARE BETTER THAN FUCKIN SATAN

1. ALWAYS ESCAPE FUCKIN DEATH

ThESE IDIOTS #1 STRATEGY? FUCKIN RUN

YA CAN'T DIE IF YOUR ENEMY LOSES YOU IN .5 MILLISECONDS NOW CAN THEY

2. PAIN RESISTANT

FANG THE SNIPER AND BARK THE POLAR BEAR BOTH FOUGHT KNUCKLES THE BLOODY ECHIDNA, FEW PANELS LATER PERFECTLY FINE (bark took a bit but shut up) ABSOLUTE TANKS THEY ARE AND YA CAN'T DO SHIT TO THEM

AND MAY I ALSO ADD

BUT THEN A FEW PANELS LATER

LIKE

SIR IT LOOKS LIKE IT HURT HOW ARE YOU ABLE TO NOT ONLY STAND BUT RUN AFTERWARDS

SAME COMIC ISSUE BY THE WAY

3. FUNNY CARTOON LOGIC

NEED I SAY MORE

THESE THREE CAN MAKE YOU SMILE IN A BLINK OF AN EYE EVEN WHEN NOT INTENDED,

THEY ARE THE LOONEY TUNES OF FUCKIN SONIC YA CAN'T CHANGE MY MIND

4. DO THE TASK THEY WANA DO

WHEN THEY ONTO SOMETHING AND THEY WANT IT, THEY DON'T STOP TILL THEY FUCKIN GET IT. PLEASE NOTE KN IDW THE HOOLIGANS WORKED WITH SONIC AND THEY LEFT WITH A PURPLE CHAOS EMERALD, THEY FINALLY FUCKIN GOT, SOMETHING HIS OTHER COUNTERPARTS COULDN'T DO AND THATS A GREAT FUCKIN ACHIEVEMENT. BLACK DOOM HASN'T GOTTEN SHIT AND GOT WHOOPED BY HOT TOPIC

5. DESPITE THEIR DIFFERENCES THEY WORK GREAT AS A TEAM

SURE FANG HAS BUTT HEADS WITH BARK AND BEAN, BUT IN THE END THEY ARE A GREAT MERC TRIO AND MAKE IT WORK, DESPITE HOW MANY TIMES OTHER TEAMS TALK SHIT ABOUT THEM WHEN THEY APPEAR THEY FUCKIN KEEP GOING AND I LOVE THAT! FOUND FAMILY RIGHT HERE PEOPLE

Ok did ya read it all?

Cool

SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? GO VOTE FOR THEM! AT LEAST GET THEM TO THE SEMI FINALS! LETS GO HOOLIGANS!!!!

[Masterpost]

[wtfgaylittlezooid]

To make up for the utter disaster of everything art related recently, some merc headcanons:

Primal has a disdain for technology. She thinks most of it is a cheat and thinks people ignore the basics. She just prefers how much more rewarding it is. You have to work a lot harder to earn the win in her eyes, and she’s more than willing for it. Kind of a traditionalist. She prefers to hunt, grow, and prepare her own food, and refuses to eat anything that isn’t fresh.

Ballista is very cartoony to me. He tends to operate on cartoon logic, and the entire reason he got into mercenary work is just because he finds it funny. The more extreme it is, the better. Killing someone is just the equivalent of a looney tune gag to him. This doesn’t mean he doesn’t take his job seriously though

Hazard to me is both a safety inspector and a mercenary. He is also a neat freak and slight germaphobe, and extremely detail oriented. They’re very good at spotting small shit and being like “fucking hate that.” I imagine they have pointed out a more than a few flaws in Victim’s little experiment rooms, which result in much tighter security (and less hope of getting out). He’s also vegetarian