#looks like suicide
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Sorry if you're already over 50, I ran out of room (you're welcome to leave your thoughts in the tags or replies!)
If you're younger than 10, get the fuck off Tumblr. People are saying swears on here!
[EDIT: It's OK to vent a bit about negative feelings in the comments/tags, but if you're gonna talk about killing yourself, do me a favour and fucking don't]
#polls#birthdays#ageing#milestones#organic home grown content#for me (28) while there's an element of 'where the fuck did the time go?'#30 sounds all right. even kind of nice#you're still on the younger side of adulthood but you're no longer one of those 'barely an adult' new adults#although some people might feel that change at 25#i feel like 40 is gonna be harder to deal with. that still feels like the age people's parents are#though it might look different once i'm in my 30s#100 tier#1000 tier#suicide mention
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meaningful work: transgender experience in the sex trade
#transmisogyny#misogynoir#transmisogynoir#these statistics dont paint the entire picture theres a lot more in the paper#for example trans men report higher rates of suicidality (likely due to transphobia specifically but could also be selection bias)#but overall it paints a surprisingly clear picture of transmisogyny along with misogynoir and other forms of racism intersecting with#misogyny. worth taking a look at#the sec trade really elucidates transmisogyny in so many ways#also i will say the paper seems v liberal in some ways but that doesn't change the statistics#anyway tags over byeeeee
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worlds smuggest tween owning noobs on wizard101
#rose lalonde#lovisas art#uhhhhh#tw suicide bait#i guess??#if u look closely at the chat window#spent way too much time recreating the ui#anyway come find me on wizard101#this has been sitting in my drafts for like a week bc i thought i posted it a few days ago#and today i was like boohoo why is nobody leaving tags on my wizard101 post#well here it is i guess#oh and disclaimer yes roses psychoanalysis is full of shit and thats the point dont @ me#shes 12-13 (wizard101 was created in fall 2008 and sburb ended the world in spring 2009#she had a very slim window of time to play this masterpiece of a game
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ordered yaoi and got served yuri wtf
#quick! post an old de art to fill the multifandom quota#yeag this was like over a month ago idk y i havent post it#i was just fucking around w this so everything looks lowq wonky#disco elysium spoilers#de spoilers#disco elysium#de#ruby the instigator#klaasje amandou#rubyklaasje#tw gun#<- i think??#digital art#fanart#tw suicide
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does it ever kill you that as spn seasons go by, sam gets bigger, stronger and can snap into a deadly machine anytime he needs to but a single paper cut will have him turning around to look at dean like 🥺🥺🥺 and dean will react like the world as he knows it is completely falling apart because of it every. single. time.
chef kiss, no notes
#sam coughs a little and gives dean a 6ft tall kicked puppy look and dean is like....suicide for me if you dont get better brother of mine??#samdean#wincest
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the Batfamily is quippy despite being quite serious, in most incarnations. but not Marvel quippy. the kind of quippy where you're staring down a threat (collapsing building, villain hurtling toward you, etc) and instead of joking about it being a rough day, they say man, this is gonna hurt or I just finished healing from all those broken ribs or even I really hope I live through this. all painfully true. it's going to hurt, you're definitely going to re-break all those healed ribs, and yeah, you might not live through it.
#passively suicidal quippy#that's the phrase I think I'm looking for#they're too self aware#everyone in gotham is kinda like this in various degrees#but the bats don't really panic#inspired by that jason/warehouse art I just reblogged#or did i queue it fuck#bruce wayne#batman#dc#batfamily#gotham#batkids#bats and birds
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KILLS 99.9% OF GERMS!
I played this game the day of launch but only just got around to drawing something for it. Genuinely a masterpiece in my opinion and I would definitely recommend it if you think you can stomach it.
#mouthwashing#wrong organ#captain curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing curly#blood#suicide tw#art#digital art#fanart#mouthwashing spoilers#I like to think she appreciated the company#I considered having him look at her. But I liked the ambiguity of him not#Personally I like to think he wanted to but just wasn't strong enough
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“cant change what you’ve done start fresh next semester”
#did this after having a breakdown in state testing today#i had three pens a vauge idea of what cars looked like and a dream#this song also hits a little too close to home (-suicidal kid who keeps getting anxiety attacks in school)#twenty øne piløts#twenty one pilots#tyler joseph#josh dun#tøp#clique art#frankies art#ns art
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CLUELESS (1995) dir. Amy Heckerling
#clueless#cluelessedit#gifs#useramys12#userjake#addys-beth#userbecca#userdanahscott#tuserella#userpunk#userblorbo#userthing#alicia silverstone#paul rudd#mal-core#cher horowitz kin moments#<- literally only made this cause i went looking for a gifset of this scene so i could tag it that but couldn't find one#so i had to make it myself#cause i had a moment just like this very recently but it was correcting a nirvana fan on the year of kurt cobain's suicide#which i knew cause i remember the vampire diaries accurately#said nirvana fan was irl luke danes tho so he obviously wasn't offended#speaking of that let's talk about this girl cause unironically quoting hamlet just to say 'be yourself' is the most obnoxious thing in the#world and i hate her#also where is my josh?????
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Curly not immediately punishing Jimmy for assaulting Anya is something I don’t think a lot of people are viewing in the complex context for Curly as the superior to both of them and closest confidante they had.
Like I am in no way saying he didn’t under react or fail Anya by not being harsh or direct with Jimmy but it really is the case that he really couldn’t. Imagine being stuck in such a confined space with very little areas to genuinely hold someone if they commit a crime. It’s not like this was an event that occurred before they departed or that they have easy communication with The Pony Express to ask for how to proceed when something like this arises. Not to mention, Jimmy’s relative power in relation to Anya as the co-pilot and second in command, he has the knowledge and access to do something to her had Curly directly punished him in this setting.
They were also Curly’s friends. It’s not just the case of him mediating something between his subordinates but people he is personally invested in don’t want to see spiral further in Anya’s case while also not wanting believe his friend go that bad in Jimmy’s actions. They were both suicidal and Curly putting Jimmy’s stability first is both out of bias but also the fact he’s aware at some level Jimmy is a danger to himself and others if not constantly placated. Combined with the fact he was in denial or just not piecing together what Anya said it’s hard to say what he buying time for and what he had treat as urgent. This isn’t even saying he doesn’t care about Anya but he’s not going jump to the worst conclusions about his friends even if part of him acknowledges the evidence saying so. It’s a complicated thing but he’s still human and needed to process it on top of trying to keep a ship that already took on a lot of water from further sinking, metaphorically.
I just personally think that while Curly failed Anya, it was a scenario where there wasn’t much he could do to the best thing by her safely and like Jimmy, we are underestimating what a good leader would do in a very fragile and tense situation like he was in. By the time he may have been ready and had a plan, things were much too late.
#like in my one Anya still respected Curly after he didn’t punish Jimmy so I assume he still respected her or reassured her he’d do something#it just was never enough because sadly Jimmy just needed to be removed from the ship and that’s not possible#cause no matter what Jimmy was going to do something stupid to fix it and Curly had to be thinking of a way to avoid that but also trying to#play the subjective role of friend and objective role of captain with two of the people he is currently closest with#not to mention how he’s a big picture guy and it’s not an excuse but those little detail and subtle behaviors are probably lost if the big#picture looks fine still and he admits he’d drive himself crazy trying to look for it#like weirdly Curlys character is only seen through the people he tried to protect and we judge him on his failures but we don’t get too much#on his insights directly as Jimmy is unreliable and he tries hard to be gentle with Anya#personal note is I don’t think Curly underplaying Anya’s trauma is a guy code protecting my bud thing but more a flaw in his personal#character in where he just wants everything and everyone to be ok in the end and taking responsibility that isn’t his to bare like he can’t#make up for what Jimmy did but he tried and that’s the problem really cause he’s just used to actually fixing it for him and it’s the case#this is the one thing he really couldn’t like I think he’s a good guy but he’s trapped in his and a bunch of other peoples worse moments#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#jimmy mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse Anya#mouthwashing spoilers#rape tw#suicide tw#also last thought is how he like also was being emotionally drained by Jimmy constantly like Anya and his relationship with Jimmy parallel#each other in such a way that both him and Anya warily follow the words of the others abuser because they fear the physical or emotional#repercussions if they don’t like her not being able to really tell curly what happened and then curly not being able to do the same and how#jimmy assaults and dehumanizes both when they are no longer a service to him like god they are more adjacent than Jimmy and Curly like Curly#messed up in a already messy pile Jimmy mad it into a dumpster fire in a landfill they are not the same
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If I can take a moment to share my experience as a trans woman on the internet
My experience is by no means unique, it's just one experience in the plethora of trans feminine experiences and not unique to only tumblr. Though, I'll mostly talk about what I've experienced here. In the light of recent events, the reaction of "the ceo," and the comments he contributed regarding dog pile harassment; I simply wish to share my experiences that I have had to juxtapose the dynamic of his statements against a lived experience.
This account started as a way to document my social transition and eventually my journey with HRT. Tumblr had always had a large lgbtqia+ community. The queer people here inspired me and gave me hope. What I didn't know, but soon learned, is that there were people here who hated me for being trans. Being early in my transition I was a prime target. TERF groups would plan raids on my account. What this entailed was: rebloging my selfies into circles that would say the most vile things about me, threaten to kill, tell me I was ugly, tell me that everyone I knew thought I was a joke, I was a monster, my family hated me, that I should kill myself, they'd download and edit my photos into caricatures or depictions of violence. They would fill my ask box with hundreds of asks detailing how they'd kill me, call me slurs, describe the ways that I should kill myself, and pretty much everything else I mentioned above with the reblogs. Their words were carefully curated to try and break me, break my spirit, break my will to live. I tried reporting it. But it was impossible to keep up with, and like many others I saw no real response. Eventually I learned that I had to block all of them. 100's of blogs, eventually 1000's of blogs. My block list these days is incredibly extensive. I had to wade through their blogs, traverse sickening hate speech and imagery to eliminate entire circles of people harassing me. I became jaded to the hate speech, hardened to it. But mind you, I shouldn't have had to expose myself to all of this just to be at peace here amongst my community. I received no help, I was left to my own devices to protect myself. The people who hurt me never saw consequences. It was painful, it was unfair, and no one else should have to put the hours upon hours of effort and exposure to hate in to protect themselves like I did. But again my experience is not unique.
I have had to repeat this process of preemptive blocking periodically once a new circle discovers me. Blocking them all before they can start the process of hate all over again. A process of hate that seems to be hitting my community with rapidly increasing fervor as of late.
I've seen others experience far worse than me. The TERF circles will hunt down their personal information and doxx them. Expose their home address, telephone numbers, names of their family members. I can't begin to imagine the terror my queer siblings must feel when someone tells then that they want to murder them all while showing them that they know where you live. This is not a new thing, not a rare tactic, it happens. And we've all seen the news stories of trans people being murdered by people who planned it and were vocal about it.
I know this is depressing. And it doesn't reflect all of my experiences. I've had wonderful experiences here, met amazing people, made close friends, found inspiration, found hope. I found a community.
And it's my community, and I never want to let it go.
I do have fear that making this statement will get me banned. But, I wanted to say it. I wanted it to exist in the world so that everyone who doesn't know our experiences has a chance to understand and with luck empathize.
I'll part on these words and hope for the best both for myself and for every member of the community.
#transgender#transisbeautiful#trans#trans is beautiful#this is what trans looks like#okay to rebagel#trigger warning: transphobia#potentially triggering#trigger warning#trigger warning: description of harassment#trigger warning: description of violent harassment#trigger warning: description of suicide bating harassment#stay hopeful#stay strong#trans community#queer community#lgbtq community#spread love in the community and build each other up
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…Tired of losing my nightmares are lucid I ain’t won a battle in my head since this war’s fuckin’ begun…..
#yes I’m still here unfortunately#not by my choice tho#against my will#i’m losing my mind#I still don’t understand#broken heart#trans#transgender#trans pride#transisbeautiful#mtf#transgirl#girlslikeus#mtf hrt#maletofemale#transformation#he told me to un-alive myself#you can’t tell a suicidal individual that#and he already knew I am#anyway I’m under observation#like I fucking want to be watched 🙄#trans woman#trans women#sad girl#i'm sad#sadness#transexual#this is what trans looks like#trans experience#trans positivity
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one time i dreamt i was the second mind in the body of a girl. i couldn't control her, only watch her thoughts, feelings, and memories. i woke up when she died of suicide. if my dream diary clearly says i was her, why do i really feel like we're two different people?
#signalis#falke signalis#elster 512#elster signalis#biruesque art#this was a real dream i had in 2021#my bestie named the girl chloe because she didnt think about her name once throughout the dream#she was looking for her mother but she gave up and then killed herself out of guilt#the only reason why her and i are separate is that her memories were different from mine#but idk how reliable that really is#like actually i couldnt tell if a thought was hers or mine#i couldnt tell if it was me or her who stopped her first suicide attempt and kept her going#i thought that was really fitting for falke and elster
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Random thought
Harley, looking at a shops display window at a very nice jacket: hmmmm
Billy, flung over her shoulder in a hostage situation: Mrs. Quinn?
Harley: There are… temptations here…
Billy: Well, as the angel currently on your shoulder, I recommend not adding to your charges for the day.
Harley: ehhh, screw it (shoots out the display window)
Billy: Well that’s a little much
Harley: Hush, you can have this back to school bookbag
Billy: aww thanks!
#whoever Harley is with just looks at her and Billy like wth Harls#saw the suicide squad clip of Harley doing this for a bag and then thought of the ‘Angel on your shoulder’ line and this became#it’s a stupid idea but wanted to voice it#Harley is a domino chain of bad choices and having fun getting out of the consequences and I love her for it#shazam#billy batson#harley quinn#dc
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A very important phone call
Quick doodly comic. I had some ideas about Marceline contacting Simon at the finale episode. Something something reaching out to your suicidal loved ones. The sweater thing was just to pull back to episode 2, when Simon helps re-stitch Marceline's dress button.
For reference:
#fionna and cake#simon petrikov#marceline abadeer#fionna and cake spoilers#adventure time#adventure time fanart#fionna and cake fanart#comic#comics#fanart#cw suicide#implied#i like to think the crown represents that#and just#simon at the end of his tether#I wish the show gave him more reasons to look forward to living
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nnnnnnnnnnnnno maa'am
#my want to draw traditionally literally split me open for the past week and leaves me literally depressed i'm so serious i can't even look -#- @ my art programs without wanting to throw up omfg should;ve never picked up those pencils#but it's ok i just needed a nap#something so relatable about them i think nelvas has something in it for everyone meanwhile eltl is secluded art museum.#it's very possible to walk around in neloth's and talvas' brains but eltl is off limits. they will NOT! get no drawings like this outta me#wtf r they thinking ........#< eltl not nelvas#something nobody on dis earth can understand ..........#talvas wants to live he likes living but neloth's presence is so strong that it overrides and deletes his will to live.#bruuuuuuuuh#i bet the feeling of neloff is in everything he does if they ever part ways he won't be able to fold clothes or anythign without wanting -#- 2 cry . for what reason . idk bc neloth once yelled at him for folding clothes like shit .what am i on rn#(talvas thoughts mode) I want this old man to hug meeee😢😢😢#NELOFF DO IT and smash him too before i do it first .#me and neloth are the same person tho so it doesn;t matter but w/e#i'm getting emotional over them right now this cannot be real#i love her .... (Skyr1m)#i opened the game for .5 minutes today to take pics of a character uight what a beautiful game.#Te/s having such extensive lore ruins the whole entire game and the franchise but whatever . skyr1m is an art piece that's just how i feel#also this might be a very hard pill to swallow for some people but t*lvas is literally a kin Vessel for young women that keep getting -#- hit on by men twice or thrice their age when they're just trying to live their life .#this feels so profound to me i need dis shit inmy discord bio right NOEW.#Talvas................................#(eyes watering) (holding palm out)#suicide //#just in case but this tag would've gone crazy with my drawings of ulfr*c from late 2022 where i drew him with slit wrists. very artsay#is it not. i didn't like neither of those drawings tho i need to revisit cus i can feel ulfr*c on a diffaraaant level#when will i run out of tags. the way you can tell i just LUH talvas look at me drawing his hair in that second pic 😑BRU#look at me also trying to replicate pencils digitally in the first.. hmmm i don't hate it#at least it soothes me and i don't have pencil withdrawal
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