#looks at you expectantly

[infirmux]

[xi-vz]

For the longest time Shang Qinghua was convinced he was in a coma. This transmigration was all in his sick and pathetic head. He wondered if his body were on life support. He wondered why his parents hadn’t pulled the plug.

Because there was no other reason as to why he was reborn into the book that he never got to finish. None of this was real, it was a stupid cultivation world that a 20-something year old started and a 30-something year old died trying to finish. A decade of his life wasted on Proud Immortal Demon Way. And this was what he had to show for it—a weak golden core and the feeling that if he fell off of his sword while flying he’d finally wake up.

These were thoughts he had sometimes, late at night when insomnia made him its bitch.

Or when he sat in a Peaking Lord meeting.

Or when he was on secret mission for Mobei-Jun.

What was it called when a person felt like nothing in their life was real? —Depersonalization-derealization disorder. (Self-diagnosed because Google couldn’t do it for him.) (Man, he missed the internet.)

(Was this depression? Was he suffering from depression?)

Shang Qinghua was his real name, the one he had in his previous life. What he hated was that he played his own self-insert! What was the point of this? He had been electrocuted and died! (Maybe.) Was this divine punishment? But how could that be when he was the fucking God of this world?

A helpless God. One that has been banished from heaven with a shackle around his neck.

(He couldn’t eat noodles for the longest time once he was able to eat solids in this life. The irony was that his new family owned a noodle shop…maybe it wasn’t irony, maybe The System was just a sadistic asshole.)

This wasn’t one of those “choose your own path” stories. He was born in Gusu, the fourth son—and the youngest of nine—in a family that could barely feed every mouth. He and two of his siblings went with a cultivator because they showed promise. His sisters went to Lotus Pier, and he would’ve gone with them if The System wasn’t a dickhead.

They wrote him sometimes. He was a Peak Lord, his family probably bragged about him to anyone who would listen. Apparently he made them proud. Sometimes, when he remembered, he sent money back home to them. His parents had done their best with him, better than his last pair. They were owed something for it.

Where was this going?

It didn’t matter. The fact was that Shang Qinghua felt as if this whole thing were just a really piss poor version of The Matrix. Maybe his own version? If not for Mobei-Jin’s beautiful chest, he’d consider this hell.

[binah-beloved]

Binah with cat ears walking over to you while you're working, leaning close, and firmly bumping her cheek against your forehead before walking away like nothing happened.

[electoons]

I'm gonna kms someone at work got me sick. and it's my BIRTHDAY

[bookwyrminspiration]

meowrella. fitzrawr XD vackpurr. prenthiss. bianya

[witheredgardenparty]

Got a bit o' the fever so excuse what I'm sure is excellent syntax. Got another yandere as pet thought.

Imagine for the sake of argument, you get stuck in a yandere situation. But this guy? This guy is 100% grain-free sap. Blue screens at the slightest provocation. Touch his arm and you just bought yourself thirty seconds of premium silence.

Now you think you got a good thing going here, yeah. Get him all trained to do you a good turn or two. Kind of like a dog spinning tricks. Except, now get this, if you thought the arm gambit was a steal -- try kissing his cheek. Now that play there is worth its day's weight in daze.

Just be mindful 'bout how often you pull that one out. Have to be wary about exposure rot. Don't want yourself finding every act followed by the expectant turning of a head, right? The tapping of a face. The knowing smile. Otherwise you're going to find yourself in the same position all pet owners do: who exactly is training who?

[zhivchik]

[lxvvie]

y'all, I'm listening to Lemme See by Usher as I write and all I can think about is you talking cash trash to your fave about the things you'll do to them and they corner you on some, "Yeah?"

[7-oh-ta1]

When I see ppl hating on king rhoam i start blacking out and seeing visions

[cunt-removal]

yellow guy coded yellow guy girl(boy)...

[byanyan]

pls imagine ur muse waking up in the middle of the night only to see byan just standing there at the end of their bed, staring at them. and they're just so casual about it. something something "hey, you're out of—stop screaming, it's only me—you're out of frozen waffles"

[motheatenscarf]

a scenario for you to imagine your WoL in:

you can only share your umbrella with one of them; who do you pick and why is it G'raha?

[tonaldissonance]

hearing my sibling listening to music and recognizing a song on its playlist is like Hey. Youre not allowed to listen to that thats mine

[coltonclay]

Listen I’m not saying it would fix anything, but grabbing Halsin’s tits and smothering my face in them to the point of suffocation would certainly change me

[discountwives]

spencer referring to himself as a grandpa instead of uncle bc he basically raised carly and considers himself her father

[mercyofempty]

do u have that video of the girl saying men don't like loud women and then it switches to a girl playing live and learn with a bunch of pride stickers?? i need to see it lol

i don't 💔💔💔💔