#look at the ingredients

[stardewnice]

if mayor lewis doesn't stop calling my potluck contributions mid im gonna assassinate him

[s0fter-sin]

everyone makes fun of soap when they find out how many hair and skin products he keeps on hand. the cabinet in his bathroom is filled to bursting and he always keeps travel sized bottles on him on missions

when soldiers outside the 141 find out, they call him precious and self-obsessed, a vain pretty boy too preoccupied with his reflection to focus on the enemy. no wonder how he got his callsign. price has given up telling him to leave them on base and just teaches him to individually wrap them so they don’t rattle against each other and give himself away

what they don’t know is that each product contains an ingredient that when mixed with any number of the others, creates potent chemical bombs. he was caught unarmed once, he won’t let it happen again

[i-am-a-secret-ssshhh]

My parents forgot that I'm allergic to soy again.

I have now successfully, yet unintentionally, guilt tripped them into making me what I want for dinner.

I actually didn't even ask them to do this. I literally told them that it was fine and I'd make my dinner like a million times, but they're just, cooking it?

I feel like I've accidentally manipulated them in some of way and I feel kind of guilty about it.

[stitchtehzombie]

Some witch: * fills a glass jar with crystals, herbs, salt, and glitter, then chucks it in a bush in their local park *

The jar: * breaks *

The salt and glitter: * spills into the soil *

The soil: * becomes infertile *

Plant: * dies *

Some animal: * gets hurt on the broken glass *

Another animal: *chokes on the lid ring *

The nature spirits: "what the actual fuck"

The witch: "why isnt my spell working :(((("

[lukashaa]

Patho fanart of varying quality

[madisoncounty]

Oscar Isaac in AGORA (2009)

[mangostarjam]

one night (fruit) stand — bnha, todoroki shouto x gn!reader, fluff, "love" as a pet name, fruit puns sorry, pro heroes, aged up, no quirks mentioned for reader, 2.2k words

written for andie's pretty boy summer collab!

"This is for you."

The low, measured tone is a welcome respite from the joyful chaos of the farmer's market, but you balk as you look up from a basket of oranges — straight into the eyes of your one night stand.

"Wait," you say. Your brow wrinkles. The man — tall, ridiculously handsome, way out of your league — merely blinks his dichromatic eyes and lowers his hand slightly. He sets the cold can of milk tea on the table and reaches up to tilt his bucket hat a little further up his head, revealing a shock of red and white hair that looks vaguely familiar. But that's not the only thing — "You have the same bucket hat as one of our regulars. But he said it was exclusive."

"I do have the hat," the hottest guy in the world says. "I'm Todoroki Shouto. Do you remember me?"

You feel the flush burn in your cheeks and up the back of your neck as hazy memories from last night leap unbidden to your mind. There was the warm buzz of alcohol in your veins — the intimate, cozy izakaya — a flash of a charming smile and mesmerizing dichromatic eyes — your quietly giddy giggling as you twined your arms around a smooth neck to stretch up on tiptoes for a kiss — stumbling into a door, tripping over shoes in the genkan, wrapping your legs around a trim waist as your partner groaned into your mouth —

Of course you fucking remember Todoroki Shouto. That was the best night of your entire life, and he was the cause of it. But why is he standing at your farmer's market stall looking like the world's hottest model for bucket hats?

You left his beautifully rumpled bed this morning way before dawn, yanking your clothes back on and mourning the loss of his strong body curled up around your own, positive you'd never see him again. You know for a fact that he doesn't have your number or any contact info.

But now he's here. At your farmer's market stall. Wearing a disconcertingly familiar bucket hat.

Maybe it's one of those new trends? You don't keep up with heroes and wouldn't recognize their branding if it smacked you in the face, but at the very least you know that when a hero starts rising in the rankings, their merch starts popping up more and more often. The hat looks like it could be one of those — it's a solid black with orange on the inside (that clashes terribly with Shouto's hair, except he still looks unfairly good), a thin line of orange along the edge, and an embroidered… grenade… patch centered in the middle.

Why anyone would walk around wearing a grenade bucket hat, you don't know, but if it's hero merch then it makes more sense. So Shouto must be a fan of this rising hero — a huge fan, to get an exclusive hat like this, but — wait, he's staring at you and gosh, his blue and gray eyes are so gorgeous and when his lips quirk in that little lopsided smile your heart feels dangerously like it'll leap out of your chest.

"I take it you remember me," he says, still in that even tone but with an edge of laughter this time.

Your face heats even more and your hands clench around the basket of oranges. "Sorry, sorry," you clear your throat. "I just… wasn't expecting you."

Shouto nudges the can of milk tea closer to you. "I wanted to see you again," he says carefully. You glance at the can and blink. It's your favorite drink to pick up from vending machines. Did that come up last night?

"And you came here to… give me a drink?"

He nods. A light breeze ruffles the collar of his shirt. His smile tugs a little bit higher on his handsome face.

Well, then. That smile is dangerous.

Shouto waits patiently as you get called to deliver the basket of oranges you're clutching for dear life. He hovers at the side of your stall, looking woefully out of place in his bucket hat and crisp, clean clothes. You can feel a streak of dirt along your cheek and your clothes are all dusty, but every time you glance back at him, he's looking at you steadily and completely unabashedly.

It's embarrassing, but you can't deny the little thrill that shoots to your toes every time you meet his gaze. "Todoroki-san, you really don't need to wait here," you say, slipping back to him during another lull in customers. "Thank you for the milk tea, though! It's my favorite."

Shouto blinks slowly as he observes you. The scrutiny does nothing to help your nerves — it takes two tries to pop the can open, and Shouto looks endlessly amused the whole time. "I would like to wait for you," he says. A pause. You bring the can up to your lips for a sip. "And you may call me Shouto. I appreciated the way you said it last night."

You choke on your drink.

The way you said it last night — gasping into his ear, moaning into his steadily fraying kisses — oh, jeez. "Ah, fuck," you blurt out, eyes widening with horror at the stray flecks of tea you've splattered on his shirt.

"It is alright," Shouto says. He pats at the small spots delicately with his sleeve and then seems to deem it unimportant. You blink as he looks up at you from beneath messy bangs. "Are you feeling… well?"

What a question. What a look. Does he know how lethally attractive he is? You take a very careful sip of your drink. "I'm… sore."

Shouto hums in response and carefully begins rolling up the sleeves of his button up. You watch, mesmerized, as the corded muscles of his forearms and biceps flex with the sure movement. You take a slow sip of your drink with wide eyes as he finishes and sets his hands on his hips. "Let me help."

Jeez, the shoulders on this guy. You can't help staring at the breadth of him as he comes around the table and into your space. A breeze of minty cool air washes over you with the movement and suddenly your brain catches what he's said.

"W-wait, Todoroki-san," you yelp, setting your can down and reaching for him. He continues bending for the large crate by your feet, hefting it up with barely any effort at all, and you're caught standing there holding onto the edge of his shirt. "Todoroki-san, you don't need to help!"

"Call me Shouto," he says. You gape up at him uselessly. "I would not want you to injure yourself because I made you sore."

"I — you — Todoroki-san," you huff, tugging even harder on his shirt. Shouto pouts and moves to bring the crate to the small truck parked behind your stall. You're forced to follow him, wary of accidentally messing up his shirt even more, though you feel a little dazed with his pout etching itself into your brain.

"This goes here?" Shouto asks. You nod wordlessly, still processing the cutest fucking pout you've ever seen on a grown man. "Would you like to hold my hand instead, love?"

Whoa, what?

Shouto sets the crate in place and dusts off his hands before reaching down to very gently detach your death grip on his shirt. You should get your hearing checked. You're clearly hearing things, because the hottest man you've seen in your entire life couldn't have possibly just called you 'love'.

"Love?" you repeat.

Shouto's lithe fingers squeeze around yours briefly. "Would you prefer a different pet name? I recall you mentioning that you liked that one."

You snap your jaw shut. "I… did…" you say slowly. But you said that to your regular, the other bucket hat wearer, the guy who always came wearing a face mask for pollen and dark sunglasses and that exact same bucket hat that you've… never seen anywhere else…

Several things fall into place at once. You stare up at Shouto with slowly mounting horror.

"Todoroki-san, are you… Helpless Produce Guy?"

Shouto laughs. Oh. Oh, you're so stupid. That's the laugh that's plagued your dreams every day for months as you've nursed your silly crush on the worst grocery shopper you've known. "So that is what you call me."

"I've never met someone more hopeless about buying fruit and vegetables," you say blankly. "I remember teaching you how to choose carrots the other day. I can't believe this. I've been teaching you how to pick watermelon for ages and I never knew your name or face. Just that bucket hat."

"Oi, Icyhot," a rough voice suddenly speaks up from behind the two of you, and you spin around to find yourself face to face with a spiky blonde guy who is undoubtedly a hero if the huge, bulky muscles are any indication. He's wearing a face mask and sunglasses, but he's got several reusable tote bags stuffed to the brim with leafy greens and potatoes and apples hanging off his arms.

"If you don't finish flirting with your new partner soon, I'm not gonna teach you how to make my famous curry recipe," the newcomer says. Shouto seems unfazed, simply tugging you closer with your intertwined hands. "Didn'tcha say you wanted to impress 'em?"

"I believe they are impressed," Shouto says evenly, glancing down at you with the ghost of a smile flitting across his lips. "I am helping because they are sore."

It's just the slightest emphasis on "sore", but it makes you itch to kiss that stupidly handsome smug smile off his face. "I'm fine," you say.

"Gross," the other man says decisively. You snort as he spins around and stomps off to look at a particularly enticing basket of celery stalks.

"Sorry, Todoroki-san, I promise I don't call you 'Helpless Produce Guy' that often," you say.

Shouto squeezes your hand. Warmth tingles up your arm and melts your heart into giddy mush. "I don't forgive you." You gape at him. He tugs you a little closer. "I will not forgive you until you agree to call me by my name."

Is he serious? The slight wrinkle in his brow makes you think… yes.

"That's… I don't know if I can," you blush.

Shouto hums. "Then you may call me your 'boyfriend' until I can remind you how to say my name."

Holy moly. This guy.

"Alright, boyfriend," you cannot say it without ducking your head. Almost immediately, his long fingers tip your chin back up. "Are you secretly a five star gourmet chef and you've just been acting like you've never seen a basket of strawberries before?"

Shouto cracks a tiny grin that pierces your heart. "I assure you, the produce help was invaluable. However, I frequent your stall the most because I find you… lovely."

Oh, dear.

"I do not wish for our relationship to remain limited to your stall at the farmer's market," he continues, as if he isn't blowing your mind with every word out of his perfect mouth. "Hence, why I could not help but approach you when I realized we were both at that izakaya last night."

"And you… knew it was me. Even though I didn't have my work apron."

"You were telling your friends about Helpless Produce Guy," Shouto says drily. "I had a feeling I knew the subject — but yes, I would recognize you anywhere."

"Jeez, Shouto," you breathe. Those dichromatic eyes widen a fraction before narrowing as you take a step closer to him. "I didn't realize… where are your sunglasses and mask?"

He pats the front pocket of his button down assuredly. "I am prepared."

You cast a quick glance around. Your coworkers are handling the stall well, and fruits are practically flying off the shelves as Shouto's friend gives a lecture to a captive audience about the importance of fresh fruits and vegetables in a healthy diet. The two of you are tucked out of view, mostly hidden behind the truck.

"And this…" you gesture between the two of you with your free hand. "We're… dating?"

Shouto nods solemnly, but there's a sparkle in his eyes. "Yes, my love. You make my heart beat berry fast."

Your lips twitch before you can help it. "No."

"I think we make a good pear," he says. "I find you very a-peel-ing."

You burst into giggles and Shouto tugs you into his firm chest. The sturdy, steadily increasing heartbeat beneath your ear isn't quite loud enough to drown out your own rapidly leaping pulse.

"If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple," he says into your ear. You shudder lightly at the low, even tone but snort at his deadpan delivery, soft as it is. "Is this okay? You said once that you liked these puns."

"I do," you nod. "And I'd love to date you. Since you have a peach of my heart."

"Good," he murmurs. You tip your head up to look at him and beam at the gentle blush rising on his cheeks. Shouto leans down to press a careful kiss to your lips, drawing back after a moment with a shaky breath. "I was running out of lines."

"Don't you mean you were running out of limes?" you snicker.

Shouto stares. And then, still with that soft, deadpan tone — "Every day with you will be mangonificent."

[canisalbus]

This is kind of an odd thing, but your art made me realized that I wasn't aromantic. I've never had a bunch of romantic inclinations and assumed it just wasn't for me, but your art made me realized that it's definitely more complicated than just an across-the-board disinterest in romance!

That's nice to hear, I'm happy for you!

I'm not an expert but to my understanding it's also entirely possible to be aromantic and interested in romantic themes, while rarely experiencing romantic attraction in practice, or something like that. The lines are sort of blurry and I guess in the end it comes down to what labels one feels most comfortable using.

[deafleppard]

Charles Leclerc & Pierre Gasly + color palette picked by @f1dyke

[seanoridraws]

Time to cook!!

[chimerafeathers]

[ on youtube ]

a concept for the type of OP i'd love to see for the second season of Dungeon Meshi! both s1 OPs are great, but i'm really hoping for one that captures both the "dangerous fantasy adventure" and "comedic cooking adventure" aspects of the series in equal measure, because it's the integration of those two concepts that makes the series special to me. the joyous whimsy and the dramatic horrors are equally important!!

[feyburner]

My problem is I love cooking, cooking videos, and looking at hot women, but I straight up can’t stand the entire genre of TikTok/Instagram reel that’s like a visibly queer yet still very conventionally attractive girl making slack-jawed/edgy faces into the camera while she cooks baked gnocchi or whatever. Sorry it’s just not for me. If I can tell without looking that the entire comment section of your video is gonna be horny gen z/millennial cusp internet queers repeating the same 10 jokes and overusing the ✨ emoji I’m not about it. Maybe on paper I should love watching a hot girl silently chop cherry tomatoes without offering any additional information but guess what. I don’t. You didn’t even list the ingredients in the video.

[beautifulterriblequeen]

Horrible new theory about Runaan's shirt today.

-no, not the new one, the one he lost-

He's still got his green assassin shirt here on the balcony, and vest too:

But by the time Gren is thrown into the dungeon a couple days later, it's missing.

Runaan's also sporting bags under his eyes because he'd been kept awake all night, enjoying Viren's frustrations about losing Harrow and also getting denied the crown of Katolis.

So. About that missing shirt.

I can't think of too many things worse for a guy who wears four shirts at once than to have them all taken off while he's badly hurt and manacled to the wall, and then be tickled half to death all night long, on his birthday.

[willowser]

hi hi willow!!!!!!!!!!! (<- absolutely not in pain whatsoever)....... i am just wondering if..... uh.... u have imagined a reason for the breakup yet? i'd love to know why you think bakugo would ever break up with you. heh heh. hah. :D (i am crying)

here are the things you don't know—yet, at this point in time after the breakup.

two weeks before, dynamight gets into an ugly argument with a civilian. over something stupid, probably; she's drunk and not listening to a word the hero is telling her, stumbling around in public and taking her shoes off and shoving at him when he tries to corral her from getting into another fistfight in the street.

it's just—bad. looks bad. before anything productive can happen, a few of her friends are stumbling out and screaming at him, too, for being a cocky asshole and putting their phones in his face and recording him and maybe he says something he shouldn't—not something terrible, just something that sounds extra bad when a group of young women are screaming and angry at you—and it gets blasted all over the internet.

two weeks before, dynamight gets dragged in the paper. for being a jerk. for being such an asshole. remember when he nearly collapsed that building last month, during that fight? so careless. and he's never friendly when anyone comes up to him on the street, either in uniform or not. is more likely to brush someone away than stop and take a picture. in high school he was a little brat, too, with the way he spoke to his peers and didn't know respect if it slapped him in the face.

his poor partner. must be miserable to be with him all the time. they deserve better.

and if they know how he is? and how he acts to the people he's supposed to take care of? well, they must condone that kind of behavior, no? they're okay with him acting like that in public? what kind of morals do they have, anyway?

the other thing you don't know yet is that katsuki has been working every day. two shifts, sometimes, to the point that there's little more he does than eat and sleep and be dynamight. there's no free time. if any tries to make an appearance in his schedule—he's filling it with something, anything; going hiking, working out, cooking dinner for his shithead friends, not being at home.

whatever he's doing, he's not being at home.

yes, he got rid of everything he could that belonged to you. because he couldn't stand to look at it and know you weren't going to use it in his house again. can't stand it. refuses to, actually. is only putting one foot in front of the other, every day, and not really thinking about that weird, awful weight sitting in his gut, that feels dark and terrifying. he can't think about it. he's not bad at avoiding those kind of thoughts—he's done it before and he'll do it again.

and lastly—he's a fucking idiot.

[caliburn-not-calculator]

A list of Planescape based tea flavours!

(I made these to be brought up in house a habit lol)

Shift spiced (from limbo, the taste of the spice changes but with focus you can modify it yourself) apple and chamomile from the fields of Bytopia

Sunrise flower (tastes like spicy honey, glows faintly) and peach, this is best served iced

Roseapple (mild flavoured apple like fruit, Elven favourite) and pomegranate from Hades, a sweet tea that makes one feel a somber calmness

Black tea with crimson lotus petal (have a “strange after taste” and can make one feel disoriented), quite strong, a sweetener is recommended to mellow it out

Arboreal fireseed (when in contact with water it erupts in a harmless flame, yes this tea is on fire, smokey flavour) and orange flower (from the feywild, the petals are sweet and the stem tart, balance each other out)

Mixed feywild berries and fairy dragon breath (contains particles of fairy dragon euphoria breath, extremely calming and causes a pleasant haze)

Dried celestial pear tea (very light and sweet) with wildflowers from Elysium, best served with ambrosia honey

[bicheetopuff]

I feel like booktok ruined yall. I understand the disappointment when it comes to Tenko rn, I’m disappointed too. But bnha isn’t any of our stories to tell except for Horikoshis. I feel like most of you care more about being right than you care about what might happen next. Yes, these last couple chapters have felt rushed and we haven’t gotten much from Izuku on a lot of things that should be addressed but I don’t think enough people are considering the possibility that it may be intentional.

Deku is an unreliable narrator and we haven’t gotten his introspective on anything for like 200 chapters. Why is everyone so surprised that we’re not getting anything now? He’s literally always been like this and I don’t understand why people think that’ll just change at the drop of a dime. His entire character is supposed to be a parody of what a shonen mc is supposed to be like. ‘Talk-no-jutsu’ doesn’t exactly come easy to him. He has flaws and doesn’t know how to express himself effectively unless he feels like he absolutely has to. I’m glad he’s being thrown back into normalcy because I feel like since he won’t have much to take his mind off of everything, he’ll be forced to address the things he hasn’t yet because the bottled up emotions will just be too much for him.

I’m sure Shigaraki will be addressed again and we might even get a My Villain Academia sub arc/callback.

Also, what’s with people’s obsession with fake outs? Is it really that serious? It’s not like a book where we get to read an entire volume at once, it’s a chapter by chapter manga. We can’t expect someone to come back the very chapter that they seemingly died. Also with Deku’s flashback this chapter, I can’t help but have hope that there was more to their conversation than what was shown.

Why do I feel like I’m the only person that has a little faith left in hori? This story isn’t here for us to grade…