#look at me im a cooking blogger

[flowergardeninthewall]

I think it's a good sign if the recipie your planning on doing for the next day includes busting the food processor out the night before to marinate meat overnight

[fghniki]

chayanneLIVE

After a certain German streamer goes viral, several bloggers speculate about his identity and origins. (Also available on Ao3. Based on these two posts: one, two.) 1,086 words. Teen And Up, Gen.

lollipop 🔁 thehatter Follow

💐 lamadrigal Follow

My latest obsession has been this german teenage streamer who stole chayanne’s stagename for his username and somehow hasn’t lost his valorant rank even once in the past four months of streaming

💐 🔁 lamadrigal Follow

carpenterbee replied to your post “my latest obsession has been…”

amazing. please tell me more

He has gay dads. One of them is an avian and the other one is chronically absent. He also has a younger sister whom he also sometimes refers to as “twin”. Apart from valorant he does cooking streams with ingredients some of which i have never seen. He hides his face behind a skull mask and always wears a duck floatie. his twitch icon is a blurry photo of a duck and he has like over a thousand followers already

💐 🔁 lamadrigal Follow

I SWEAR I didn’t make this guy up

#sure thing op

3,867 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

thehatter 🔁 thehatter

🎩 thehatter 

WAHT WAS WHTA

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

AM I CRAZY

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

i am watching chay stream rn and i just saw some THING pass by his window???????? what the fuck was that

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

janettree replied to your post “WAHT WAS WHTA…”

some animal or something ?

ON TOP FLOOR OF A SKYSCRAPER???

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

I MEAN IM ASSUMING THAT WHERE HE LIVES. FROM THE VGIEW AND WHATNOT

#also that thing was like black and green wtf #is that a fucked up creeper variant

23 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

🎩 thehatter 

THEY LIVE ON TOP OF A GIANT WALL???

98 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

lamadrigal 🔁 janettree Follow

🌲 janettree Follow

the architecture of that place is impressive considering the height

🌲 🔁 janettree Follow

carpenterbee replied to your post “the architecture of that place seems…”

are we having a house tour

yeah !! chay is showing around the house. apparently they live in a basement and their dads live on the ground floor ? they have a photo wall, it's very cute

14 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

janettree 🔁 pedropascal Follow

🔥 fireup Follow

 Image

 Image

 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 BRAZIL MENTIONED 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷 🇧🇷

#the photo wall in question #also lmao the brazilian flag one

401 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

lamadrigal 🔁 janettree

☁️ manintheclouds Follow

Who is helping Chayanne today?

☁️ 🔁 manintheclouds Follow

lamadrigal replied to your post “who is helping chayanne…”

His cousin? I think his name was Richarlyson

Aww, that’s cute

Didn’t realize he had any

👨 🔁 pedropascal Follow

Image

IS THAT CELLBIT

#what's up with this family and stealing famous people’s nicknames

189 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

janettree 🔁 pedropascal Follow

👨 pedropascal Follow

Important context for that post is that Cellbit is a Brazilian serial killer who escaped from prison back in 2015 and then vanished off the face of the earth. Now, everyone kinda assumed that he just drowned, but unless whoever Richarlyson’s dad is has his exact face, he seems to actually be… wherever Chayanne lives?

💐 🔁 lamadrigal

so, Germany?

👨 🔁 pedropascal Follow

DOES he live in Germany???

🌲 🔁 janettree

i swear i heard someone speak french during the stream the other week

#thought i was tripping or something

96 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

🎩 thehatter 

a plane at some point crashed into the wall they live on???

#maybe i should have gotten into jerma instead

2 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

💐 lamadrigal

 Image

omg i love pomme’s outfit so much

7 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

☁️ manintheclouds 

we’re making WINE??? HELL YEAH!!!

3 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

lamadrigal 🔁 janettree

🎩 thehatter 

Image

Pomme’s dad looks. uhhhhhh

🔥 🔁  fireup Follow

Chat asked what this guy was and Chay said “he’s French”

🌲 🔁 janettree

as a French person i can confirm that this is an average french male

#i hate it here

391 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

janettree 🔁 lamadrigal 

💐 lamadrigal

is there a single mom in the picture

#pomme has a mom!

7 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

janettree 🔁 pedropascal Follow

🐝 carpenterbee Follow

does chayanneLIVE pass the bechdel test

1,038 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

janettree 🔁 leobonita Follow

🌲 janettree 

new sibling ! Leo, about Chay’s age, girl

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

does this make, like. ten siblings

💐 🔁 lamadrigal 

Tbh i thought most of those were his cousins? also yay, a new girl!

🐶 🔁 leobonita Follow

soy de género fluido

#?

341 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

☁️ manintheclouds 

hell yeah, black forest cake today!!! love those

0 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

💐 lamadrigal 

Sunny and Empanada are the cutest ever omg

6 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

lamadrigal 🔁 carpenterbee Follow

🐝 carpenterbee

chayanne will get banned for breaking dmca one day mark my words

#whoever this tubbo guy is #probably shouldn't be encouraging him tbh

739 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

carpenterbee 🔁 lamadrigal 

🎩 thehatter 

WHAT WE KNOW ABOUT CHAYANNE

Parents: two gay dads. First one: blonde, short, avian with black crow wings. Second one: “Missa”, absent but apparently coming back? Couldn’t decipher what his job was

Siblings:

Lullah (younger sister, looks pretty much exactly like him tbh. speaks fluent spanish)

Sunny (even younger sister, she’s like five??? Black, wears sunglasses non stop. Has a different dad. maybe their parents are in a polycule?)

Empanada (younger sister, speaks German. bio sister? looks pretty different from him tho. same mom maybe? she has at least two)

Ramón (brother about his age, sticks to Sunny like glue from what it looks like. has at least two dads of his own?)

Richarlyson (younger brother; speaks Portuguese. has a prosthetic leg)

Pomme (younger sister. speaks French. has a mom)

Dapper (same age sibling? idk its hard to tell, they only come if pomme’s around)

Leo (same age sibling, speaks spanish)

Pepito (younger sibling, speaks spanish)

Mentioned but never appeared on camera: bobby, juanaflippa, tilín, trump (?). seems like they’re either away or deceased? so probably older siblings our cousins

So wherever he is it’s a place where they speak:

German

English

Spanish

Portuguese

French

and also which would harbor Brazilian Criminal Cellbit.

🌲 🔁 janettree

>she has at least two

bravo les lesbiennes

💐 🔁 lamadrigal 

So… Luxembourg?

🐝 🔁 carpenterbee Follow

lets not turn this community into discount kiwifarms maybe

#there are probably reasons why he doesn’t want anyone to know his location #for example the fact that he's a minor

201 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

🐝 carpenterbee

thehatter asked:

Yeah, you’re right. i deleted the post. its just hard not to speculate, with how crazy his life seems to be

nah i feel ya

#replied to u in dms btw #don’t reblog

1 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

thehatter 🔁 thehatter

🎩 thehatter 

chayanne ended stream early because of an emergency and i swear i could hear bombs??? does htis kid live in a warzone???

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

like genuinely should we be concerned? what happened?

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

apparentaly he just retweeted some cat video. wat

🐝 🔁 carpenterbee

*apparently

🎩 🔁 thehatter 

this time i will really do it

87 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

carpenterbee 🔁 thehatter

🌲  janettree

tubbo just yelled “I'M SO SAD AND LONELY, I'M SO SAD AND LONELY, SOMEONE MAKE ME A GRINDR ACCOUNT—”

#i maintain that he would make an excellent streamer #give that engineer a twitch channel

626 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

nightbringer 🔁 manintheclouds

☁️ manintheclouds 

Oh, Chayanne is making pozole today!

🌃 🔁 nightbringer

??? The singer????????

4 notes     ↪💬🔁🤍

[whosmaggy]

whats cookin'

i have heard through the grapevine (whatever that is) that to be considered a blogger, specifically a favourite blogger, one must actually blog! i think the big thing to write about right now was my recent move, however i just dont want to. i do really love it here and feel so comfortable, i just need more time spent walking around the city to talk about it. definitely see myself being here for a long time tho!

anyways as i listen to

i will give a list of all the things i have cooked in the kitchen of my uni residence:

Bagels!!

https://mxriyum.com/homemade-everything-bagels/ so easy and turned out so good! i had all the ingredients (there are like 3) and my dear friend, A, gave me everything bagel seasoning so ofc i had to make bagels on my first day here! (picture is attached at the top)

2. Chicken soup!

so good! i had half a pack of chicken thighs left and didnt want to eat anymore chicken and rice. so i made soup! always use bone in and skin on chicken. sear the skin side down for a few minutes to get a bunch of flavour and then cook ur vegetable's (celery, onion, garlic, and whatever else) in that. added spinach for iron and corn for cooler looking poops!

3. pasta

penne alla vodka (no vodka, sadly (im in AA)). Very easy, ive made it so many times, i dont need measurements. melted string cheese on top adds a lovely addition.

4. breakfast

not really cooking but i have become a breakfast person. currently its been bagels, fruit on the bottom greek yogurt (a different flavour every week!(this week its blueberry)) with granola and strawberries. also occasionally (weekends or tuesdays) ill make an egg white and spinach omelet and toast.

Have been cooking and eating others things as well. fruits, carrots and hummus, chickpea curry, granola bars, ice cream, miss vickies. also had a burger 2 days ago, and have 5 more frozen burgers left in the box. i have only eaten out twice, once for a bueatiful friends birthday! and once cause i wanted a burger and milkshake (they forgot my milkshake and gave me a can of pepsi instead).

anyways, i have been laughing at scammer videos, taking the train, and having dreams about one direction getting back together.

hope everyones had a fun first 3 weeks of uni!

Much love, care, and appreciation,

Maggy 🍔

[shesbackagain]

rules: bold the ones that are true and tag fifteen other bloggers to do it too

Tagged by: @lunarlesbianlove gracias bonita 😙💖

APPEARANCE:

i’m over 5’5” // i wear glasses/contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing // i have one or more piercings // i have at least one tattoo // i have blue eyes // i have dyed or highlighted my hair // i have gotten plastic surgery // i have or had braces // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails // i typically wear make-up // i don’t often smile // i am pleased with how i look // i prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backwards

HOBBIES & TALENTS:

i play a sport // i can play an instrument // i am artistic // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks // i can do a handstand

RELATIONSHIPS:

i am in a relationship // i have been single for over a year // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend // i met up with someone i have met online

MISCELLANEOUS:

I can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mom friend // i live by a certain quote // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities // i enjoy mexican food // i can drive a stick-shift // i believe in true love // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed // i am multiracial // i am a redhead // i own at least three dogs

AESTHETICS:

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sun rise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colours // i find mystery in the ocean // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season

No pressure tags: @ninetyfourtic @heartofloveletters @im-lizard @kara-is-a-baddie @lustygoblin @theroyaltenenblarghs @strangeandspooky @softlikevelvet

[wlwhq]

hey all!! under the cut are some wanted plots for each of my muses, shoot me an im or like this if any of these are calling your name and id be happy to plot something out with ya! <3

(ps everyone's a sapphic below so give me all your sapphics plz)

soleil. late 20s. baker. jasm.in savoy brown fc. switch.

fwb where your muse is getting attached and soleil is being distantly distant as per usual

someone else in the baking/cooking/restaurant industry where they could work together??

mikayla. mid/late 20s. interior designer. saman.tha logan fc. top.

little sister's best friend ship for the angst of a secret relationship

rich well off milf for mick to work for in designing a new mansion

nora. mid 50s/early 60s. lawyer. julia lou.is dreyfus fc. top.

law student/maybe a law professor if we lean into the collegiate territory (insert crazy eyes here)

anywhere where she can be a sug.ar mommy please !!

mariana. late 30s. er doctor. americ.a ferrera fc. switch.

FELLOW DOCTORS/INTERNS/NURSES/PLZ.........

someone to help her lighten tf up

samantha. late 30s. defense attorney. sara.h snook fc. switch.

fellow older woman who can take her on a sexual Journey of discovery

another lawyer at her firm, so there can be Late Nights Working...

maggie. early 30s. dancer. ari.ana deb.ose fc. bottom.

i have a spider-woman verse pls dont let it go to waste...give me your super villains and your drastically angsty anti-heroes she will love them

also a verse with her as a backup dancer for a famous performer, touring together....it could get ga.y

rowan. early 30s. paramedic. er fi.ghtmaster fc. top.

older sibling's wife. imagine the side eyes emoji here

old ex from college that can't resist the Energy!! & hooking up

darcy. late 30s. restaurant owner. katie mc.grath fc. switch.

regular at her restaurant that's always trying to be flirty and darcy finally giving in

food blogger/food critic that's always hanging around or stopping by bc can't get enough of the food or of darce

violet. early/mid 30s. speech language pathologist. tat.iana mas.lany fc. switch.

bc vi works with a lot of kids, maybe give me your single moms??? please???

older friend of her dads who she thinks is hot pfft

georgia. late 30s. executive chef. nata.sia demetriou fc. switch.

another chef at her restaurant who she has a love/hate relationship with and refuses to give the time of day

former therapist who worked georgia through all of her shit a decade ago and now they're friends/casual??

destiny. early 30s. therapist. quin.ta bruns.on fc. bottom.

give her someone to simp over my god she's probably the softest out of my muses

grad school bestie that maybe they would occasionally hook up? and don't talk about it so they don't ruin the friendship?

syd. mid 20s. tattoo artist. kehla.ni fc. top.

tattoo clients/fwb!! she'll accept payment in head

someone they used to cam for regularly

cole. early 20s. barista. liv hewson fc. switch.

someone they look up to (professor, coworker, counselor) that understands the they/them experience

current girlfriend who goes on a cross-country road trip with them in a bid to get out of their small town and start Living

evie. mid 30s. florist. taylo.r swif.t fc. bottom.

acquantaince of her mom that she's seeing on the low low

someone who doesn't give a shit that she comes from money and doesn't care who she is (that would make her so !!!)

aurora. early 50s. tech ceo. hann.ah wadd.ingham fc. top.

i cannot stress enough how much of a sugar mom.my she is. please.

fellow mil.fs to form a mil.f alliance with

nadja. 500+. vampire badass. nat.asia deme.triou fc. switch. canon character from wwdits

LESBIAN VAMPIRE POLYCULE PLEASE!!!

also if any of y'all write as the guide i will cry

disclaimer that nadja is just a test muse of mine and i might be bad at her so PLZ

[flawedfemalecharacter]

thank u for tagging me remi!!! @kaleidoskuls

rules: bold the ones that are true and tag fifteen (15) other bloggers to do it too!

APPEARANCE:

i’m over 5’5” // i wear glasses/contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing // i have one or more piercings (used to have on on my ear put she closed tf up) // i have at least one tattoo // i have blue eyes // i have died or highlighted my hair (once when i was twelve w semi permanent dye lol) // i have gotten plastic surgery // i have or had braces (i had a retainer and it sucked) // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails (very rarely) // i typically wear makeup (i used to not wear it for a while and i honestly miss that) // i don’t often smile // i am pleased with how i look (if u ignore the eating disorder) // i prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backwards

HOBBIES & TALENTS:

i play a sport // i can play an instrument (sorta . the basics)  // i am artistic // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own (im delulu abt this but) // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks // i can do a handstand (physically probably mentally fuck no)

RELATIONSHIPS:

i am in a relationship // i have been single for over a year // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years (7 years and counting) // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend  // i met up with someone i have met online (funny story i have this friend i went to hs w but we never talked in hs we started talking online)

AESTHETICS:

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sun rise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colours // i find mystery in the ocean (ngl im rlly scared of her) // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season

MISCELLANEOUS:

i can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mum friend (controversial take) // i live by a certain quote (honestly i dont remember it but i think i saw some post on tumblr ages ago that talked abt how being dead would be so boring and thats how im still alive today) // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities (used to be in hs) // i enjoy mexican food (sad mi se jede meksicka hrana) // i can drive a stick-shift // i believe in true love (i believe all love is true love) // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower (havent done that in a long time eww) // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed (i wishhhhh) // i am multiracial // i am a redhead (shouldve been i stand by this) // i own at least three dogs

tagging: @fantastista @nocakesformissedith @nefhertari @cyypress @dyk3-on-a-byk3 @ariesbilly @decadentworld @imsodishy @pikslasrce @hummingbird-hooligan @blessyouhawkeye @theultimatewildcard @gay-archie @uwussy @theunvanquishedzims (this is the first time i actually tagged 15 ppl) + anyone who wants to join!!!

[miserabella]

share a recipe tinkerbell <3..

OH last week i made the most glorious salmon bibimbap with oi muchim. (bibim means ‘mix’ and ‘bap’ means rice in korean! so it's basically a rice dish, and really lovely. and oi muchim is spicy cucumber salad)

under the cut!

disclaimer i’m not korean so i am in no shape or form saying this is the 'best' bibimbap recipe, or even an authentic family one. it's the closest i can probably get though, i looked into a few recipes and adapted them into this, and hopefully i remember everything i tweaked!

NB. i used salmon but you can substitute the salmon for anything, like other fish or meat (chicken for ex.), or if you’re vegetarian: tofu, mushrooms, or just have it with a fried egg and some spinach... the possibilities are endless :3

this served 4

stage 1: marinating and soaking (most time consuming part)

so. the rice. the best is japanese/sushi rice but you can use any kind of sticky rice (thai or round, i've heard are also good). now fellow white people listen up this is how you make rice properly (this part might be obvious for asians hehe, so u can skip reading this). you have to wash the rice once or twice, then, with some more water, leave it to soak for 30 mins. (20 is fine if you’re in a rush, but if you do this at the start and do the other steps it will have plenty of time to soak 😌). then once your 30 mins is up, just switch on the rice cooker! [there’s a note at the end for if you don’t have a rice cooker.]

ideally you want to marinate both the salmon and the oi muchim (cucumber salad) overnight, but it’s okay if you dont, ppl are busy. i only marinated for about 30 mins and it still tasted v good! but obviously the flavours will stew more if you cover + leave them overnight. also, don't get overwhelmed with the extensive preparation stage, bc the cooking takes like 5 mins literally. :)

for the cucumber: wash and peel 1 cucumber, and cut it into thin-ish circles. then toss them with plenty of salt (2 or 3 tbsp should do it or do it by eye) in a bowl or colander, and leave for about 15-20 mins.

meanwhile, start with the salmon marinade. you’ll want like 100-125g of salmon per person. cut off the skin (at this point you might want to check for bones, ask me about that if u want - i come from a fisherman's family haha) and cut them into cubes

peel and chop 1 white/yellow onion and 1 salad onion/ the white bit of a leek (here’s a video on how to chop onion efficiently, warning it's gordon ramsey, sorry - also remember to wet the knife and your hands with cold water to reduce onion tears 🥺)

peel 1/2 an apple and chop into equally small pieces. to chop also: 4-5 cloves of garlic (depending on how much you like it 😗🧄🤍) and about 25g of ginger, peeled ofc.

mix all of this (onions, apple, garlic, ginger) in a bowl and add: 1 tablespoon of honey, 2 tbsp of sesame oil, 4 tbsp of soy sauce. now you can add the salmon, mix well, cover, and leave to marinate.

back to the cucumber which has been resting with the salt. thoroughly rinse the slices to get rid of excess salt. now you have to get some clean kitchen towels and pat all the cucumber slices dry, and put them back into a bowl, to which you’ll add the yummy spicy bits! which include: 2 tbsp soy sauce, 1 tbsp sesame oil, 25 ml rice vinegar, 1 teaspoon of sugar, and a good serving of chilli flakes (i did this by eye but i would say use about 1 tbsp, or more). mix! (marinate!)

stage 2: cooking and serving (the quicker part!)

heat a bit of olive oil in a pan and fry up the salmon chunks gently (ie on a medium heat), until they become golden (first they go from dark pink to a solid light pink, and then they slowly turn golden) i fried the marinade sauce with it but you can choose not to, up to you. this takes only about 5-6 minutes.

it’s also nice to add carrot shavings/strips, bean/soya sprouts, sweetcorn, fresh spinach leaves, or fried up tat soi (i had this and the carrots, very yummy). basically any crunchy veggies that you have in the fridge/cupboard. and to top everything, some sesame seeds if you have :-)

now you can serve ! you can put all these dishes separately on the table or serve people ready made bowls with everything already put together (the rice, the salmon, the cucumber, and the extra bits)

NOTE

if you don’t have a rice cooker, first off, re evaluate your life decisions - nah i’m kidding (but fr, consider buying one it’s an essential kitchen item imo, but obvi i understand it’s not easy to have everything, i only have access to one bc my parents have one and i'm currently living at home). if you don’t have a rice cooker, your quantities are: 200g rice, with about 250ml water. after you’ve soaked the rice, and the water is boiling, you’re looking at about 15 mins cooking time, but check the instructions on your rice packet just in case.

if you have a rice cooker i assume you have your own way of calculating quantities, but feel free to ask about that too :)

[feral-crow]

making things with the pure intention to just create, no matter how bad the end product may be, is one of the most therapeutic things you can do for yourself.

this year, i started bookbinding. and yeah, my first book wasn’t the greatest. and yeah, all i have are cheap supplies and sometimes the end product isn’t exactly how i wanted it to turn out, but holding a finished book in my hands and feeling the thrill of i made this, i made this myself and there is nothing in the world that is exactly the same as this end product is one of the reasons im still living.

so go out and create, not with the intention to give it to anyone, or to sell it, or to display it online. just create for creation’s sake. embroider your hoodies, paint shitty doodles on your notebooks and phone cover. sow together little plushies out of scrap fabric. make music out of ambient noise to listen to during quiet moments.

and maybe you’ll learn something about your craft, and maybe you’ll learn something about yourself. maybe the embroidery doesn’t work out, but you learn that you really like tying knots and making jewelry out of them. maybe fabric’s too flimsy for your liking, but you love making clay pottery. maybe you’ll keep your first plushie, and look back on it years later thinking “how much i’ve grown”

my first book vs. the newest one, made almost a year after the first. the first has maybe 30 pages, bound in cheap flimsy cardboard and is extremely warped from tea staining. my most recent has a little over 300 pages and is bound in faux leather and thick cardboard. 

[hyunecafe]

The Boyz Ships Ao3 Fic Recommendations  ☻

❥ Lovesick Idiots Anonymous   signing off as always: a lovesick idiot, anonymous or an au where hyunjae is an anonymous blogger who posts daily love letters to his best friend lee juyeon and thousands of people have made it their mission to find out his identity.

❥ Oh Cue Our Sanity  “Hi, Detective. Did you miss me?” Juyeon freezes. It’s been two years since the last time he heard his voice. Two years since the last time he heard the Phantom Thief call him that: Detective In his playful and taunting tone. Juyeon has almost forgotten how much he hates it.

❥ Five I Love Yous, One I Love You Too “Yeah, I just like to read stories and wish for a relationship like the main characters.”

❥ Hello, My Soulmate Everyone has a soulmate, but you only know who yours is when you are 18. But Hyunjae strongly believes something is wrong when he dreams of his arch-nemesis, Juyeon.

❥ How to Cook (Easy! I Promise!) On September 16th at 3:22 PM, Jaehyun is tasked with the arduous task of cooking Christmas dinner for his entire friend group. The best part of it all is that he has literally never cooked! Not once! Luckily, YouTube - and its slew of videos made by chefs with the prettiest hands - is there to help.

❥ Never Let Me Go Hyunjae is set to inherit Seoul’s biggest entertainment firm, CRKR, and Juyeon is just the guy who used world’s worst pickup line on him in the club. ❥ I Like You (Sorry I Never Meant To) Hyunjae, adamant on not looking like a complete loser in front of his ex, is desperate for a fake boyfriend for his sister's wedding. Juyeon, his worst enemy, is ironically the perfect candidate.

❥ Valentine's fool Juyeon wants to propose to his boyfriend of 5 years, Hyunjae, on Valentine’s day. But unknowingly, Hyunjae keeps ruining it. 

❥ Room 143 hyunjae realises he can't ever escape from juyeon since their brothers were dating, their friends were marrying one another, their other friends were dating and on top of that, due to unfortunate (maybe fortunate in the end) circumstances caused by eric, they are also now hotel roomies! ❥ Get Out  juyeon keeps crashing into hyunjae and haknyeon's dorm and no one really knows why.

❥ Oops Wrong Name Story of how juyeon said the wrong name during his wedding vow.

❥ Pumpkin Pie hyunjae texts a random number he found on the walls of a vandalised toilet cubicle which may or may not just belong to juyeon 

❥ Kisses In My Dreams  story in which juyeon loves giving hyunjae little kisses when hyunjae's asleep but hyunjae wants juyeon to do it when he's awake(or that "my flatmate keeps giving me lil kisses when he thinks im asleep. how do i ask him to do it when i'm awake too" post

❥ Just An Act hyunjae gets his decade-long bestfriend, juyeon to pose as his boyfriend for a valentine's day event all for fried chicken.

❥ It Takes Two juyeon and hyunjae gets sent on a date while being in disguiseorhyunjae goes on a date as chanhee + juyeon goes on a date as changmin and they end up falling in love without knowing one another’s true identity

❥ Love Me or Hate Me juyeon, self-proclaimed president of the anti-hyunjae fanclub is forced to go to a fansign for his brother, eric who happens to be hyunjae's biggest fan.

❥ Every time I Look at You (It’s Like the First Time) “are you lee hyunjae’s first love?” eric blurts. “what?” “juyeon,” eric repeats exasperatedly, leaning over the wall to set his coffee down gently on juyeon’s desk. “are you lee hyunjae’s first love?”juyeon blinks at his coworker a few times before saying, “are you talking about… actor, lee hyunjae?” “no, i’m talking about the guy i ran into on the way out of starbucks this morning,” eric says with a sigh, before waving his phone in front of juyeon’s face. “obviously i’m talking about the actor, lee hyunjae!”

❥ Professional Comma Boyfriend When Juyeon looks at Jaehyun and says, "I'd date Hyunjae," what he really wants to say is, "Jaehyun, date me."

❥ Exhale My Name (Absorb My Soul When You Breathe In) The three times Chanhee wondered who Jaehyun's wife is, and the one time he met his husband.)

❥ It Gets Brighter Than July Jaehyun and Juyeon decide to get better at queerbaiting—without realising they're already dating, that is.

❥ You’ll Be On My Mind  5 names that Jaehyun likes, and the 1 that he thinks might be his favourite

❥ Give a Little, Get A Lot  “do i look untrustworthy?” hyunjae asked in amusement, tilting his head slightly while he watched juyeon’s expression, or lack thereof, for anything to betray his thoughts.juyeon had only been in his presence for five minutes altogether, but the smile had already begun to irk him. it was as fake as they came, without an ounce of warmth to be seen, but it wasn’t entirely forced. no, it seemed lee hyunjae liked to look conniving, enjoyed being the center of attention both good and bad. ❥ Looking Out For You (Like I Always Do) juyeon, standing by hyunjae’s desk, sets the bottle of chocolate milk down on hyunjae’s notebooks, patting the top of it. “don’t fall asleep during class,” he says, a note of amusement in his tone.hyunjae considers doing so just to spite him. ❥ Specious  “One Iced Americano and one Strawberry Ice Blend.” Hyunjae recited the order off the top of his head.Surely a person with amnesia couldn’t possibly remember such details from a forgotten period of time so well, right?

❥ The Night That Shakes Me Up Hyunjae’s the unlucky guy who picked cross-dressing for his penalty. But maybe he’ll get lucky in other ways—enter Juyeon, part-time innocent bystander and full-time horny individual. ❥ (You're the) Chef's Special Jaehyun's pouring significantly more than two tablespoons of olive oil into the bowl when Juyeon sees it. Smoke wavering in the air behind him. Jaehyun eventually sees it too in the viewfinder. "Oh god, not again!" He cries out, running to turn off the stove .And Juyeon laughs. Which causes his hand to clasp over his mouth. He has never, should never laugh at such blatant unsafe cooking conditions.  ❥ Hungover You Juyeon keeps getting drunk, and his friends have no choice but to call Hyunjae, his ex-boyfriend because he’s the only person Juyeon is willing to listen to

❥ Rhyme or Reason There's no reason for it. No purpose, Hyunjae admits, in the dark quiet.It's just love. ❥ But I'm Sure You Can Change My Mind Jaehyun thought that Juyeon was brilliant in everything he felt and possessed. No, he had said it out loud for Juyeon to hear, before telling him to kiss Jaehyun only next to his lips. Because Jaehyun couldn't see what he wanted clearly still. ❥ Lend Me Your Lips  "i'll bring it tomorrow just so you know. and we start tomorrow too. have fun visiting your brother! send him my regards... and eric's." juyeon smirked, knowing that he had won another battle between him and hyunjae - another crown to add to his proud collection of victories against the weak, defeated lee hyunjae. he turned and left hyunjae in the field by himself. ❥ My Boyfriend's Gap Moe is Unmatched! When Chanhee finds out his soft, shy, and pretty childhood friend, Jaehyun, has a bad boy boyfriend, he realizes that perhaps his darling sweetheart of a best friend could not have been as innocent as he had thought. ❥ Even In Another Universe, You Are My Home Angels and devils have been living separated from each other ever since the very beginning, but two very different beings ended up in each other's arms nonetheless. ❥ Under The Bleachers  Jaehyun and Juyeon met in high school, fell in love, and then, life happened. And years later, Jaehyun still can't forget about him. ❥ Hush, Love It's always been Jaehyun's dream to have a band with his best friends, but he didn't think it would turn into a nightmare. Or Jaehyun and Juyeon are in a band together and something happens and Jaehyun catches feeling against his will.

❥ Bold Much Tonight? (I Want You) assassins! jumil wherein hyunjae was paid to take out juyeon and juyeon was paid to take out hyunjae's boss. however, they come to a win-win deal with hyunjae getting his freedom and juyeon decorating it.no violence is heavily descripted, however the mention is still there and throughout the whole story, violence and death threats are present. a mental episode takes place for a short time in the story so be careful for that too when reading. ❥ Anti-romantic  Let down again and again, Hyunjae is cynical when it comes to love. However, in an ironic twist of events, his first heartbreak might just be the one to change that.  ❥ Beautiful Stranger  Jaehyun doesn't have to read too deeply into signs. ❥ Blond, Black, and Blue  Before, Juyeon was nothing but a stranger in Hyunjae's life. Someone Hyunjae didn't even notice. Someone that only existed in his peripheral vision. Now, he can see him everywhere. It’s like Juyeon refuses to not be seen once Hyunjae finally noticed him. Now, Juyeon is everything but a stranger in Hyunjae's life. He has become a steady presence, an uninvited guest that constantly occupies Hyunjae's mind. ❥ At The End Of My Winter (You Wait For Me) Juyeon wants to move on, but Hyunjae makes it impossible to let go

❥ Touchdown Lee Juyeon, the school's star football player, is undeniably whipped for the student council president.

❥ Tears Are Prettier When We're Both Happy Juyeon can’t change the way his boyfriend sees himself in the mirror in a day, can't make him feel like he's the only boy in the world in a day, but he sure as hell can try.

❥ Red String Hyunjae is the perfect student — until he’s suddenly falsely accused and faced with expulsion. He will do whatever it takes to prove his innocence, even if that means asking his number one rival Lee Juyeon for help. ❥ Falling For You Everyone with a partner must have a story about how they met for the first time. Some met when they were just students, some met when they're walking on a park, some met at their workplace, and maybe some other met in a bar. Jaehyun, though, met his now-boyfriend after saving him from falling from a 15-meter high balcony. ❥ It Was Enchanting To Meet You  He learned how Jae’s eyes light up whenever he shares something he loves, and Juyeon also learns that he likes the way those eyes light up. It’s only almost more than an hour ride back home, but Juyeon feels that he already knows who Jae is all his life, he finds out that he doesn’t hate it one bit. A fateful encounter that starts with a carton of oat milk and ends with one. 

❥ Wabisuke  But maybe, just maybe, they can find a solution to their problem—one that doesn’t involve blood, but one that definitely involves something a little sweeter.

❥ Us On A Love Letter  Jaehyun receives an anonymous love letter, not expecting it to be from his rival counselor that he's been fighting with all summer camp.

❥ ❥ My Summer With You  Sunwoo hates his new summer job. His co-worker, Changmin, is the exact opposite. They clash from the very start, but as they work together, their feelings start to change. ❥ ╰

❥ ╰

[myelocin]

send this to ten bloggers you think are wonderful. keep the game going 💕✨💫 - @ryuiki

!!! u are the loveliest T^T as a show of appreciation im just gonna word dump an impromptu speech here ;w;

@xavestory - yk i always think story telling is already such a challenge with words but the fact that you can do it so naturally with art is just sth always worthy of an applause. not saying this bc im ur friend n u have blackmail material over me but im saying this as someone who has been ur fan before ur friend

@saetyrn9 - miss MAAM my LOVE MY LIFE amy TwT i love u!!! thank u for always writing the most beautiful pieces T3T im such a scatterbrained reader and often find it hard to immerse myself in words but u somehow have this way of just easing me in and having me float in this world from beginning to the end. and it NEVER stops at the end too. ur characters always feel human and i love u for that. what u've written have always lingered ;;w;;

@churoomiii - i appreciate u because at this point u are more than just this rando i found on the net. tq for sharing ur words and ur heart. (tear streaks down cheek)

@tsu-kiss - literally how do u come on tumblr to reblog 2 things every 2 weeks and still have the best aesthetic plz spare me tips my blog looks like a screencap from phub but emo version. thank u for sticking thru this whole time. ilu as big as the skies

@23soong - the part 2 to my part 1 in ayahuasca. cant believe it's a year in and we still find reasons to cry tgt whether it's 1pm or 1am. (crying emoji) (secret handshake)

@hvnlydmn - i still cannot believe u are a diluc stan but it's ok i will still support u. LMAO. ains how the hell do u have energy to have a full life outside of tumblr and still come here and keep ur blog up to date like i post 2 things every week and disappear for ten years. either way my liddle tumblr space always feels incomplete unless i see u around so thank u for being a part of this home TwT

@keisukesbaji - idk how else to preface this other than by saying helow mandy ur one of the ppl i will always remember when i think ab day 1 on this blog. u radiate so much joy and kind energy so thank u for constantly being here and constantly healing. i can't wait to cook for u

@prettyboykatsuki - HA. ARI. WOW. i can't think of love unless i think of your writing. so much of your wisdom and raw kindness bleeds into your pieces so thank u for all u do seriously. i WISH i can properly articulate how deep ur writing is embedded in my mf SOUL but alas pistachio nut brain i can only cry and clap again and again. but ily. u are wonderful. ily ily ily.

@mintchocolateships charlie!!!!!! u are such an angel. leading up to the last few chaps of aot i can never even think ab it unless i think ab u. ;;w;; i sincerely hope you constantly find joy and love all around and that it's there with u before u even think of getting up and finding it. levi feels incomplete without jenna in my head now LMAO

@gg9183 hey my day 1. wow. day ONE. it's nice to think we're in the same universe sharing this little corner tgt. u are the most lovely and im so thankful u let me in ur life ;;w;; i offer nothing but blurbs and the occasional poke on ur askbox but tq TwT

@acxciia i hope u know i genuinely think of u as ate kay in my head now LMAO. u are honestly the personification of the kindest form of love and im so incredibly blessed for u. + ur music taste?????? HAH ILY EVEN MORE

@amjustagirl nikki my love TwT resident big sister of this whole fandom u bring so much joy to this community. + all ur pieces??? IMMACULATE. i wish u the happiest every single day u are my whole sunshine and ily. 

@danibby i genuinely hope we meet one day just so i can give back to u and give u the biggest hug just to let u know how much i adore and appreciate u. let’s sit somewhere together and share some fruit and stories. ily times infinity ate

@neoheros rue!!!!!!!!! ur writing has always lived in this special room in my heart so thank u for continuously giving us gold. thank u for letting the most human part of love slip into ur words. u have no idea how much i look up to u.

@shinchiro i cant believe u like issei out of everyone in hq girl what did he do to deserve u. slander to ur lover aside, u are such a kind person im so thankful for u. thank u for letting me peek into u and issei’s world but as well as urs. my whole heart, always miss xin makki can have the crumbs leftover

[tokyokookmin]

UGH can we just talk about how cute jikook are! I mean they're so delicate with each other.

ps- i love your blogs, keep going!

Yes!, sure we can.

There are just so many moments of jikook, it has been explained by many other bloggers as well, therefore I won't speak too much regarding it but should I make a masterlist KINDA of jikook moments, I suppose you would love it anon! Well, its top im not sure cute jikook moments then.

1. JIKOOK VLIVE

So what I personally love about this v-live is that JKK just decided to go on live and they were pure goofs~ .Like please someone give a award to Jimin for being the most dramatic man while cooking or we say "pouring sauce into the bowl with being so immersed till he forgot to open the cap". I love the way they bonded, and how theyjust united for ARMY and and making their hometown style gimpab!

ps: jkk are too chaotic

2. RUN EPISODE 97

This episode is very underrated, both of them were practically babies! It was pure fluff and I loved the way how JM drew faces under his pair of socks and kept showing it to Jungkook and how both of would laugh hysterically. (sometimes I can't differentiate their laughs). Jungkook drew under his socks as well, like his drawing is too good. Y'all I know that viral moment, but im not gonna mention it because this blog is a fluff blog~

ps : watch their behind the scenes~

3. RUN EPISODE 112 & 113

This was THE VIDEO WHICH MADE ME A JKK-ER. Yeap I used to be a vminer and I still am, but this episode just made me realized the interest jkk shares with each other and how both of them were so cuteee in this episode. My vmin barrier broke once I saw how JK rushed to JM to hug him so that he could become his partner. MY GOSH jk is a protective one huh.#busanbross

ps : it was hilarious, (jimin can't handle muscle bunny, he's heavy ahaha)

4.TVN YOU QUIZ ON THE BLOCK

So this was a pretty emotional interview,(not cute but it was heartwarming) but before I talk about that can we just appreciate that moment where jimin knew jungkook wanted to talk about something but ends to not to and they both just shake it of by laughing and holding their hands. What made me sad is when jimin started talking about their debut hardships and how he teared up a bit and how jungkook told the host about how JM is the most hardworking member in the team and said comforting words about him.

ps: im emotional now help- i love jimin so much.

5. SPEAK YOURSELF TOUR THE FINAL 2019 10 29

Even by looking at the picture you can see the comfort. You know that GCF-TOKYO song "there for you' which implies that Jk means he will be there for jimin but "you gotta be there for me too" which means jimin gotta be there for him too. So yeah, JM just know jungkook well and he comforts Jk pretty well.It was so cute and i wished i was a part of the audience, i would have had a panic attack looking at them being so cute,fluff,intimate ON STAGE . Too bad it's impossible now .

ps: jungkook loves army so much, i'm too soft

6. IN THE SOOP

Please jkk never gives me a break, they were the best duo in (in the soop lol), they both were playing (drunk) chasing after each other and then JM broke JK's mosquito net and and rest is history. AND PLS.. the next morning jungkook literally went to cuddle JM because he knew he was injured. And how unbothered Jk was was jimin was imitating how loud he snores. #unbotheredkingjungkook.The rest was just them fooling around and just having fun ... it was heartwarming and i personally treasured their moment there.

ps: watch in the soop by using dailymotion if you don't have membership huhuhuhuuu.

Thank you for the lovely praise anon . It's late right now so I will add more of their precious moments and cute ones as well, I hoped you like it . XOXO. stay safe.

[fucker-anon]

Puppeteer Headcanons

K so this mans has been living in my head rent free since I first laid eyes on them (like 2013) so here are my headcanons about their backstories, personalities, and more. Some are inspired by the original stories and lore, some are inspired by other bloggers, some are me self-projecting. Warning there are mentions of dark themes so keep caution. Also i am not a writer, (im sorry) @creepy-bi-day enjoy!!

Puppeteer~

Backstory: 

Puppeteer was born as Jonathon Blake on July 23, 1974

Mother was Hispanic, dad was American. He grew up speaking Spanish and English. He also never really got along with both sides of the family cause he’s mixed (they didn’t like that). They kinda preferred his siblings.

had 4 younger siblings (3 girls, 1 boy). He was 4 years older than the second child.

ever since he could walk he was obsessed with musical theater. For a while his family was able to Johnny to theater camp. Stopped after the 3rd child was born due to financial reasons

parents were working full time to take care of their family. meant Johnny was basically acting like a 3rd parent. good news was he was able to take care of all 4 of them and meet their basic need of being fed, staying clean etc. bad news it meant that he was taking care of them 24/7 and was constantly tired and not taking care of himself. Started to develop symptoms of depression, but couldn’t get help due to the stigmas around mental health + he’s a guy.

got worse in highschool when his work load increased and he wanted to do more in drama and music but couldn’t cause he had to take care of his siblings. He also didn’t make many close friends except for one girl in his drama class Erma. 

Erma was his best friend and they started dating in their second year of highschool. She helped him as much as she could with his mental health, their studies, and even helped babysit some days. They brought out the best in each other. 

Erma loved dance and wanted to become a ballerina, but her parents tried to keep her focus on studies. They did allow her to take theater which she also loved. Her parents were very strict and controlling so she had to hid her relationship.

It wasn’t until the second child turned 13 (johnny was 17), when she started to help out more with the other three siblings (12f, 9f, 7m). Thanks to her help and now they were in a better financial position, johnny was able to join plays and bands which had afterschool practices.

He was really good. He discovered he was born with perfect pitch and was able to get the lead in a play in his final year. This was also when he was able to score a scholarship so some of his uni fees would be paid for.

he decided to major in theater and wanted to go on Broadway or at least become a drama teacher

however when apply for uni, Erma’s parents discovered their relationship and they offered Erma a choice, break up with johnny or else they wouldn’t pay for Erma’s schooling. They hated johnny mostly due to racism and the fact that he wasnt going into a “stable career”. Erma choose to break up with Johnny but didn’t want to tell him these reasons cause she knew that it would upset him. So instead she told him that she’s fallen out of love and wanted to break up.

Johnny agreed mostly to make her happy, but this started his spiral downwards.

Johnny didn’t have any friends other than Erma, he also went to uni in a different city so he didn’t have his family there. His depression got really bad, and he ended up isolating himself and failing first term. He decided to kill himself via hanging. Problem is he wasn't heavy enough to kill himself right away, so he was suffering for hours. 

He spent his last few hours allowing himself to finally “be selfish” and allowed himself to be angry at his family, Erma, and his overall life.

due to this anger, he was able to come back as a ghost, wanting others to feel the same pain as him.

when he came back he was able to change his body into his idea of a perfect vessel, some improvement were making himself taller, better hair, clear face, smooth voice, bigger dick.  and now feeds off of negative energy

Personality:

cold-hearted, cunning, manipulative, a smooth talking, somewhat charming. this is the very carefully crafted version of Puppeteer, He’s the guy who could talk you into doing anything, mostly stuff like jumping off a bridge

however once you get close to him, you see more of Johnathon than puppet. He is very protective of his close friends, will fuss over them and scold them if they aren’t taking care of themselves

good luck getting there tho. After Erma he really had a hard time opening up to ppl due to his fear that they will all leave him at one point. 

Powers:

he feeds off of negative energies, the more trauma the better (finally imma a snack), so he usually influences his victims into a deep depressed state where they off themselves. However once he started hanging out with the creeps (mansion au), he really didn’t need to do that since everyone is a lil fucked up. He just feeds off a little bit of everyone, so that no one is really affected. At this point, he probably has enough energy to outlive the fucking queen

He’s a ghost so he can levitate at most like 10 m above the ground, and if he focuses, he can go through walls and become invisible. 

he has golden strings due to the ectoplasm inside of him (make his eyes and mouth glow to). This strings are like limbs, They are tough to break but if you do its gonna hurt him a lot. They can extend up to 60 ft, and are about 1 cm thick. 

Fun Facts (cause idk how to categorize these)

lots of trauma, need therapy. he feels a lot of shame for what happened and only opens up to his very close friends. again born in 70′s, theres the toxic masculinity and some internalized homophobia. 

still a theater kid!! love musicals and can still sing and play guitar. His vocal cords are a lil more sensitive cause the whole hanging thing, but as long as he warms up, can has the range baby. also has Macbeth memorized

can still cook. while he doesn’t like his past and doesn’t need to eat. He wrote down all of the recipes he knew and will sometimes make them again

dick is 6.5 inchs soft 7.5 hard, i know y’all wanted to know. if also like 6′2 tall. tall big boi

i hc him as pansexual. yea he rather died again than admit that he loves someone, but he won’t care about gender. he still is cis tho.

he does fuck. not often but occasionally. slightly lower sex drive than average 

grunge king. he grew up in poverty and he great at diy. very leans more punk grunge but can be soft grunge depending on his mood. love beanies and his hair is a little longer than chin length with lots of layers. He is tempted to shave off the sides of his head tho. also has grunge and punk music on his playlists.

bad with tech. like the opposite of ben. gets called an old man since he couldn’t figure out how the tv remote works.

he doesn’t grow facial hair, doesn’t like the look.

acts like he’s too proper to cuss, but he does.... a lot

experienced some racism while growing up so he does say ACAB

probably has some piercings or tattoos or both 

still is depressed, has some tough days, but doctor ej gets him pills to help and he has a good support system

shit this was a lot so Helen is next with another post. ill get into their friendship and relationships with other in a whole new post if yall like it. someone tell me if this gives joy cause i could write an essay on this man

[khnstllflwr]

Tell Me A Story - khnsllflwr

TW// All payne, no Liam.

"Louis Tomlinson, singer song-writer, ex member of the legendary band, one direction and his long-time girlfriend, model, fashion blogger, and social media influencer, Eleanor Calder just announced their engagement this morning, they said that the awaited wedding would be broadcasted in the 28th of Septem--"

"Tss. The 28th, huh. Really?" Harry tutted before shutting off the telly. He stood up from the couch walked around it, heading to the kitchen. He made himself a cuppa with that ridiculous tea he always liked, not that Harry liked it, but the other one just made him liked it 'more like forced me to like it' he thought. Thoughts came flooding down like the showers that are danish, they were flooding down on Harry while he stares at the brand of tea, before he even indulges into deep memories and start bawling his eyes out, his phone rang, thankfully, it rang.

Fetching his phone by the coffee table, he took a quick glance at the telly then back to his phone, "Gemma❤️" was calling.

"Hey sis, what's up?" Harry answered the call.

"Hey Harold, I was wondering if I can leave Darcy over there, Michal and I are going to a business trip to LA but she doesn't want to go with us, she said she's rather stay with you, is that okay?" Gemma asked, he smiles.

"That's actually really wonderful, I would love to take Darcy in, when are you leaving for LA? When are you going to drop Darcy?" A hint of excitement is running up to Harry's stomach, he always loved kids, and always wished he could have one. He missed his niece although he's in London he didn't get a chance to see Darcy because of work.

"Our flight is actually tonight so is it okay to drop her in later? In the afternoon maybe?"

"Oh that would be really lovely actually, I'll wait for you guys then."

"Are you still in London? Are you in Hampstead?" Harry's smile faded, his shoulders dropped, he hesitated for a bit then answered.

"I-im in Barnet" Harry choked. There's a few seconds of awkward silence before Gemma answered.

"You mean in Royal Drive? Are you in Princess Park?" She asked, bewildered, a bit quietly, or so Harry thought, but it's definitely quieter than before.

"Yes....." Harry answered very quietly.

"Okay then... I'll drop her in later, okay? Love you, take care" a breath of relief for Harry when Gemma answered in her usual tone.

"Love you too sis, take care, tell Darcy I'm excited to see her" Gemma chuckled before answering "okay" and hanging up the phone.

There's a few minutes of silence before he looks around the living room, he arrived there last night, tired, sho he immediately went to sleep but now that he's awake he could fully see the whole manor, the memories, everything, everything and nothing that happened here. All those days and nights that they shared, the fun, the happiness, the sadness, but especially the love.

Harry spent the whole morning looking around the manor and changing what needs to be changed (like there's anything that needs changing), Cleaning what needs to be cleaned (like there's even something to clean), and unpacking the baggage he left last night lying out and about his bedroom floor. Harry is now in the kitchen cooking something very nostalgic, when the doorbell rang, 'it must be them', he thought before taking off his apron, turning off the stove, and skipping to the bloody door.

"Uncle Haz!" Darcy immediately came running off to his uncle's arms when the door opened.

"She missed you a lot" Gemma chuckled, Harry invited them inside.

"Wow your house looks like a castle" Darcy said, amazed.

"Would you like to stay for lunch?" Harry asked while his 5-year-old niece is hanging off his back.

"Oh no we're okay, we need to do something important here before flying to LA" Michal said, Gemma's husband.

"That's a waste then, but its okay" Harry answered while Darcy is playing with his hair.

"Darcy darling, would you mind getting down Uncle Haz's back? Mummy needs to talk to him" Gemma asked her daughter politely, with a little "okay mummy" Harry bends down and Darcy climbs down and goes running for her dad, Gemma pulled Harry to the kitchen.

"Are you okay? I just read the article shortly after you hung up the phone, is everything okay?" Gemma asked in a very elderly sister-y way.

"Never been better" Harry answered and gave her a reassuring smile, actually ot was more of a fake smile than a reassuring one but nonetheless. Gemma noticed, she always notices.

"I know that you probably don't want to talk about it, but I'm worried about you okay? And if you want someone to talk to I'm here, Harry. I'm always here" Gemma gave him a heart warming smile and gave him a hug, a hug that Harry needed the most, he hugs her back and they stood like that for a few seconds until Gemma lets go, it's always the other person who lets go, but Harry, Harry never does.

After talking and reminding for a few minutes Gemma and Michal bade goodbye to Darcy and they both gave her a goodbye kiss to the cheeks.

"What are you making Uncle Haz?" Darcy asked when they're both in the kitchen. Harry smiles sadly and looks down at what he's making.

"Well, this-- this, I'm making Chicken stuffed with Mozzarella wrapped in Parma ham with a side of mash Potatoes" Harry chuckles at what he just said.

"That's a lot of words, but it sounds delicious, is there anyway you can shorten the name?" She asks still looking at Harry dead in the eyes while her hands are cupped to her cheeks.

" I reckon it's actually pretty long," he chuckles, " then let's call it Louis Bleu" he smiles.

After they've finished eating, with Darcy blabbering over and over again that 'Louis Bleu' is now her favourite dish and would ask her mum to make it for her when she's back, they spent the whole day watching cartoons and playing games. They even went to a nearby park and played with the swings, they fetched themselves some chocolate and ice cream in the nearby convenience store on their way back. It was a really nice day.

"Uncle Haz, Can you tell me a story?" Darcy asked when night fell and its bedtime.

"Sure love, what kind of story do you want me to tell?" Harry obliged, fixing her blankets while he sat at the edge of her bed.

"Can you tell me a fairytale story, or even a love story? About a prince and a princess?" She asked, smiling, he looks at her, smiling, but now with the sparkles in his eyes.

"Well, I don't know any love story about a prince and a princess, but I do have a story about a prince and his soulmate, the little one with the cheekbones" thoughts and memories started rushing and filling up his head and his smile gets wider, he does his little fond nose crunch at the memories.

"What's a soulmate?" This little girl asked.

"Its a--," Harry hesitated, "Well-- It's like a bestfriend but more, its that one person in the world that knows you better than anyone else." Harry looks up and spaces out with thoughts in his mind, thoughts that are begging to come back. "It's someone who makes you a better person, no-- actually they dont make you a better person than you than yourself, its because they inspire you," he stops to breath, and he looks down.

"A soulmate is someone who-- who knew you and accepted you and believe in you before anyone else did or when no one else would. And no matter what happen, you'll always love them. Nothing could ever change that." Harry finally finishes, his eyes a bit glassy he feels like he's about to cry but then he felt Darcy's embrace 'she truly is Gemma's daughter' he thought.

"Don't cry uncle Hazza, im sure that soulmates are really beautiful and happy" she says while patting her uncle on the back, Harry chuckles.

"I know love, it really is, now let's go on to the story" Darcy lets go of him and starts to climb to bed again.

"So-- there once was a prince, he was a bit lonely and he's not very confident, he really loves to sing and would love to perform around the world, one day he met this boy in the loo," he chuckles, Darcy does the same, "This boy..... Is the little one with the cheekbones," Harry stops, just to see Darcy's reaction but she didnt react at all, "Aren't you surprised that the prince's soulmate is a boy?" He asked, a bit taken aback.

"Well, no, Mum told me that we can love who ever we want even if it's a boy or a girl" she answered. Harry felt so much happiness he thought he was about to explode but he pulled himself together and continued the story.

"The little one with the cheekbones has magnificent beautiful blue eyes and an attractive smile, the prince fell in love then and there, when they first locked eyes with each other" " After that they've spent a lot of time with each other because they both have the same interests, they wanted to sing and they wanted to travel and perform around the world, they wanted to be free. They both were put in a band or a group with three other boys, the irish princess, the bradford badboy, and leeroy" the nicknames made Darcy laugh out loud, it took a few minutes to calm him down.

"Okay the five of them were very close with each other, they were always together, they were best of friends but the prince-- the prince felt a lot more affection for the little one with the cheekbones, he's his favourite out of the boys. There came a point were he realized he loved the little one, but he was scared to tell him because he might push him away"

Darcy interrupted, "Why would he be scared? If he loves him he should tell him right away right? Because someone might take him away?"

'I know' Harry thought 'but there's some things that people are too afraid to lose that's why they don't say it, That's what I also regret, I didn't tell him sooner.'

"Yes, you should but don't worry. As the the days go by they've become closer and closer together, and the prince fell harder each day, he was really in love with the little one with the cheekbones, little did he know he likes him too" Darcy gave an unholy shriek of excitement, Harry, although startled, gave a smile.

"So one day the prince couldn't take all the love anymore he felt like he was going to burst, so he confessed his love for the boy, and he was surprised to find out that he loves him too, from the first they that they met," Harry game a teary smile, "They decided to live together, in a castle."

"Just like here? Like this house? It really looks like a castle" Darcy asked

'Exactly here, they lived exactly here'

"Yes, just like this one" Harry answered sniffing a little bit.

"So did they live happily ever after?" She asked with excitement, her eyes glistening with curiousity.

"They lived happily, sure, but there were some bad people who wanted them apart, that's why they had to hide their love from others, they were forced to stop interacting with each other when people are around so they do it in secret"

"Why? But they love each other, isn't that enough? They dont have to hide it right?" Darcy asked, a bit teary eyed.

'We do love each other, I also wished we didn't need to hide it' he thought, but he brushed those thoughts away.

"They also didn't want to hide it, but it's their only choice or else the bad people will break them up. So they chose to hide it when their outside so they won't take them apart. They will do anything they say, just so they could stay together."

"Just like soulmates." She said absent-mindedly.

"Yes, just like soulmates. They did everything together, they travelled the world, they performed, they sang, even though they can't show their love to other people, they still show it in little ways like quick glances, secret touches, and cheeky holding hands. They also made their skin like paper, all the things they can't say they write or draw it in their skin, because no one can erase them, it will forever be there." Harry touches his arms full of tattoos.

"Just like yours?" Darcy asked.

"Just like mine. They also have a lot of matching drawings, Do you know what's my favourite of all?" Harry asked, she shakes her head. " The prince has a ship drawn in his left arm," he touches his left arm where the tattoo is located, "and the little one with the cheekbones has a compass that points ships to home drawn in the inside of his right arm, it means that the boy will always be the prince's home away from home" Harry smiles, a little bitterly, with a hint of pain.

"That's really sweet" she says sweetly, butterflies filling her stomach.

"It is, They feel safe around each other's arms and feels happy in the presence of one another. They faced every storm together, and also faced every sunny day together," Harry stops, smiling, staring at nothing, trying to remember everything, all the memories, "and even when they're apart from each other the universe always finds a way for them to meet, to get back at each other's arms. They were soulmates" Harry smiled at Darcy.

"They really fell in love, didn't they?" She asked.

"Yes, yes they did."

"But what happened after? Are they still together now? Did they fight the bad people? Are they gone?" She bombarded him with questions one after the other.

"Well the bad people got into the little one with the cheekbones, so in the end, he let the prince go, but the prince didn't, he never does, he's still holding on. Now the little one with the cheekbones is getting married to a beautiful princess while the prince is left alone but he was happy because he got to meet his soulmate, the little one with the cheekbones." Harry finishes his story, a single tear escaping and rolling down his cheek.

"So the little one with the cheekbones loved the prince after all." She stopped,

"But he let go? Doesn't he love the prince anymore?" She asked sadly. 'I really hope he still loves him, but I believe that he already truly let go, all the prince wants is for the boy to be happy, even if it's not with him'

"No one knows, not even the prince," Harry answered, 'but he's still hoping that maybe the universe will put them back together, if they really are soulmates, or if he just assumed it' Harry whispered audible only to himself.

"But you said that they're soulmates, Im sure the universe will find a way to get them back together right? Even if it takes a long time?" Harry smiled, then nodded.

"Could you tell me their names?" Darcy asked curiously. "The prince's name is Harry and the little one with the cheekbones is named Louis" he answered, Darcy smiled a little sleepily, she pulled the covers up to her chin and said,

"Well, Harry and Louis' love story is the greatest one I've ever heard, even if it didn't end with a happily ever after." Before closing her eyes and falling to sleep.

Harry answered, tears falling down one after the other.

"Yes. Yes, it is."

The end.

A/n: Hey guys! So this is my first ever larry fanfic. I am in no way trying to Disrespect Harry or Louis, I just believed that they fell inlove at some point of their life, even if its just a split second. And I believe that they're love story is the greatest it's actually the only reason I actually believe in love. I wrote this fanfiction because I was bored and the power cut off, so I wrote a story on my notebook it was inspired by 2 Larry edits: 'They fell in love, didn't they?" And 'What are soulmates?' from the og larry editor in youtube her channel is GossipSmile check her out! She's really great. The name Darcy is also inspired by a girl from Tiktok who does POV's and she does Darcy Styles check her out guys! There's the link. Love you all, spread love, TPWK xxx

[imanes]

are you familiar with the korean vegan? i recently discovered her through tiktok and im absolutely in love with her cooking (and the camera work) and some of the unhinged stories she tells, its so therapeutic and calming lol

oh yes i am VERY familiar with her videos and i watch them on mute exclusively lol i haaaaaaate the “deep intimate story” voice over like kudos to her for being such a great cook and she’s obviously inspiring so many people with her stories but i literally cannot deal. i hate knowing too many things about strangers bc i never forget things that people tell me about them and here i am knowing way too much about a lady who got close to her dad only after her tense divorce. all i wanted was the tofu recipe ma’am... i’m glad for u that u like it though! i had to rant to my friends bc she speeds up her videos sooooooo much when she isn’t doing her storytimes but like i want to know her recipes they look so good... about to pirate the shit out of her ig videos just so i can slow them down on premiere pro smh. i’m very frustrated tbh and i know that she doesn’t owe me anything and like to each their own and it’s her cooking page u know? like she is free to do what she wants with it and it’s obviously working. but i can’t deal with it i’m a “jump to recipe” girl i don’t even read the shenanigans of food bloggers akjfljgk i’m just deeply skeptical of the juxtaposition but i get why it works for some ppl. i simply don’t believe in unhinged story times unless i really like the person otherwise the virgo jumps out and gets like “can you get straight to the POINT!” but she’s got great production and mad skills honestly

[unexpectedcronchiness]

WOLFSTAR AUS AND JUST THEM BEING ARTISTS LIST, PT 9 of stuff that comes from the chat

i can just see sirius who was raised pureblood being able to dance and one day hes teaching moony and remus is humming along with the music allowing himself to trust completely, and be guided by sirius, not really caring if he's doing it right just enjoying the feeling of the moment, being in sirius' arms, enjoying his little chuckles as he steps on his feet and the content sighs when the end up just holding eachother, and rocking gently like i live and breathe that shit

OOh and painter remus is classic of course, but how about painter sirius, who paints in emotional bold colors, and smears and impressionism because he likes how freeing it is, without lines, and hes just always got a sketchpad, smells like oil paint, and is covered in paint in his hair. When hes feeling particularly emotional he does abstract and no one ever really understands except moony who only needs to take one look and understands instantly

and MOOny i know i go off on musical sirius but I will fight to the death for a moony playing soft acoustic guitar, or ukulele or singing with his soprano ass voice or singing with his deep rumbly voice, or even jumping on stage, shredding because hes so full of emotion and shit adrenaline and being on stage is a drug of its own, and hes got so many emotions and he pours them into every song he writes

OOH and sirius would be such a theater nerd, he would quote the classics, the iconics, the new and unheard of, he would swoon dramatically and he would pose, but when it came down to it he could connect with the audience in a way no one else could and he shines when he's given a spotlight and an audience because he does it for people, to make them laugh or cry or just feel because watching a show and crying along with everyone in the audience and the person onstage is such a powerful moment that you remember

And of course writer/lit major remus. He writes like there's no tomorrow, he has too many empty journals, and even more filled ones, he carries his laptop, at least two books, and at least two journals with him everywhere in a messenger bag and he wears sweaters and corduroy and he writes poetry that makes the people who don't like poetry feel things, and have to admit there's an art to it. He publishes anonymously and under at least 7 faux names because his style is so fluid, he writes to fit the characters and the plot, not himself, hes very adamant about that so he divides his work up into categories and coffee shops and late nights with caffeine and glowing screens at 2am is all remus baby

ok but like blogger remus and vlogger sirius, just imagine a whole story told through their blogs and vlogs of them meeting and it starts out like "there was this hipster idiot in line at the coffee shop today, i fell in love instantly and hated every second of it" "-vague sirius hand motions as he explains how this angry guy with scars kept staring him down at a coffee shop and its such a shame that angry dude hated him because random angry dude was so pretty"

also florist remus, taking time to acquaint himself with angles and nature, everything temporary as petals wilt and leaves fall off eventually, knowing every flower, where they grow, in what climates and what they mean in flower language. Florist remus writing love notes to his customer sirius who shows up to get flowers once a week for his house and he hides messages in there like "you look nice today" all the way to one day where he says "I think im in love with you" and sirius accepts the bouquet unblinking because he doesnt know what it means at all or so remus thinks and then the next day sirius shows up with a bouquet of his own, handpicked and messy, with leaves poking out at odd angles that says "i think im in love with you too"

baker sirius that fully believes that love is a secret ingredient in food and lives by that 200% and remus first goes into his store to satisfy his sweet tooth and stays for the handsome dark haird man with frosting on his face. Sirius who does desserts from all over the world because being pureblood had to teach him something and so he wants to share it with others and his pallette is so refined, and hes using the weirdest combinations of spices and they all work, sirius loves experimenting with different flavors together "ok like that but this time with paprika!" "its a dessert sir!" "thats never stopped me before my young apprentice, watch and learn" and he flirts with the cute mousy haired man with a pallette (almost, sirius scoffs) as refined as sirius' "theres paprika in this, why tf is there paprika in this this shouldn't be working" and they talk for hours about food and one day when they finally start dating sirius spends a gentle evening teaching remus to cook cookies as remus is a mess in the kitchen and as they take them out, both of them covered in flour and giggling, remus has the biggest grin on his face like "I made this, we made this" and sirius remembers the first time he made something right and its just sooooo

OOH and teacher both of them because teaching is an art form, change my mind, but they both have very different styles. Sirius is fun and easygoing, you can't walk by his classroom without hearing laughter, and he slips the lessons in subtly and tactfully and remus is passionate and straightforward and captivating and makes learning easy, and they could be teaching elementary school to college, all their students love them. Sirius would be so patient and gentle with kindergarteners, gassing up their finger paintings and remus would do the best story time with the best books and voices for the characters and making faces and for like highschoolers and college kids, they would be honest with them and so understanding to students who came to them (and students would, they were easily the most trusted members on whatever campus they're at) and with troubles at home, or just mental health, or just dangit they had a long weekend, and remus would nod understandingly and give them chocolate, recommend them to maybe the school counselor if they needed it or and ask them if they were safe and sirius would cry with them, and tell them stories about his own experiences because if anything helps its knowing that you are not alone, and you can get through this because other people have gotten through it and you're so strong etc and i just love the boys so much

architect remus who loves gothic revival and neoclassical styles and he loves the history in buildings and how they seem to defy the laws of science all while paying homage to them, and everything is so organized and planned, every calculation is perfect, its something where there is a right answer while still having creative freedom, all you have to do is dare to imagine, and then figure out how and he loves how permanent, how real, how physical every building is, how some serve purposes, and some are art, and some are both

photographer sirius who goes insane places to get the perfect shot at insane angles, who loves taking candid portraits because those moments feel the realest and he has a super power, a super power to capture it and share it and hold onto it and relive it whenever he wants, he photographs his friends all the time, he has a wall in his apartment thats just one big collage of his favorite photos of his friends, and then hes also very good at photoshop, getting that one color to pop just right, to change the composition just enough

[missmentelle]

This might sound very silly but I just don't know how to be more proactive. I've been very passive all this years until this point where I feel like I can't anymore. I wish I could be more hardworking for the things I want but I get all overwhelmed and don't even know how other people have the energy or the motivation. People think Im just lazy. I don't have almost any skills let alone any that I can monetize, I feel like Im going to be a looser forever.

I think this is a problem that a lot of people - especially younger people - are struggling with right now. We want to achieve great things, and we feel like we should be achieving great things, but many of us are so paralyzed by doubt/anxiety/apathy/uncertainty that we have a hard time mustering up the motivation to run basic errands, let alone chase our dreams. I’ve certainly spent more than my fair share of time beating myself up for the countless days that I’ve fucked around on Reddit all day instead of actually achieving anything, even when I was fully aware that I was sabotaging my own dreams and goals by doing so. I just couldn’t always muster up the ability to care about the things I needed to be doing, even if there were dire consequences for not doing them. The good news is, there are definitely ways to overcome this issue, and reach a point where you are happier with your progress and your life. To get started, I recommend:

Decide what it is you actually want. Telling yourself to “be more proactive”, “work harder” or “have a better life” is not helpful if you don’t actually have specific goals that you’re working towards. It is very, very easy to find ways to be “busy” for 8 hours per day - but being busy doesn’t necessarily mean progress. Take some time, and think about some rough goals that you’d like to actually work towards. Don’t worry about how much work or effort it would be to achieve those goals, just start thinking about what you want in life, and what’s the most important to you. Think about the kind of life that you would like to have someday, and start figuring out the steps you need to take in order to get yourself from your current life to the life that you envision. It’s okay if those things are very far apart - the point is not for you to get overwhelmed, but for you to have something to be proactive about. 

Start slowly. You cannot go from “spending 8 hours per day mindlessly browsing the internet amidst a pile of old take-out containers” to “running 5 miles every morning before making art for 8 hours in a spotless apartment with a fridge full of vegetables” overnight. Trying to change your routine too drastically and too quickly will lead to you burning out in a couple of days and going right back to your old ways, with an added dose of self-hatred because you tried and failed. Trying to be more productive and more functional is a process, and a long one at that. It’s not at all unusual or abnormal to take several years of work before you get your life to where you want it to be. Start slow. Start with incredibly tiny changes, and slowly build up those changes over time. If you currently live on a diet of fast food and candy, and you want to be a shredded, clean-eating fitness guru, you can’t rush into that all at once. Start by swapping out full-sugar pop for diet pop for the first month, and trying to drink more water. That’s it. Don’t make any other changes. Then the second month, switch out diet pop for flavored water. And so on. Change only sticks when it’s gradual. 

Focus on one thing at a time. Again, trying to do too much, too soon is a recipe for fast burnout and self-hatred. Start by trying to change one area of your life, and one area of your life alone. Once you feel like you have a pretty solid handle on that part of your life and you have established some new habits, then you can add on a second area of focus. Spend some time, and really think about which area of your life is the most important for you to change, and which area of focus will improve your life the most. If it helps, envision your problems as rocks that you are carrying around in a backpack with you at all times. What’s the heaviest rock in your backpack? If you are overweight, unhappily single, making no progress building your YouTube channel and failing out of college, then your college grades are probably the thing causing you the most stress in your life, and they’re your most urgent concern - focus on that, and give yourself permission to let the rest of it sit on the back burner until you have boosted your GPA. Only then will you be ready to start changing something else. 

Go easy on yourself. I think one of the pitfalls that many young people face these days is that they absolutely crush themselves with unrealistic expectations of what they “should” be doing with their lives; it’s hard to get up the motivation to do anything when you’ve convinced yourself that the bare minimum for success is an impossible ideal. I have friends with master’s degrees who still consider themselves failures that haven’t done anything in life. Remember that you are not a machine. Even at your most successful and high-functional, you will not be perfect and productive 100% of the time. You will still have lazy days where you don’t get much done. You will still occasionally order takeout instead of making a home-cooked meal. You will still occasionally procrastinate. Don’t set yourself up for failure by comparing yourself to an unattainable ideal - just aim to be a slightly better version of what you are right now. 

Get used to tracking, even without making changes. It’s hard to set goals for improvement if you don’t have a solid idea of what you’re actually doing right now. Telling yourself things like “stop being so lazy and do more things” is setting yourself up for a spiral of self-loathing if you don’t actually track what you’re doing, because you won’t be able to see the small, gradual progress that you’re making. Being able to actually see yourself taking baby steps toward your goal is important for keeping you motivated, and keeping you from beating yourself up. Don’t track absolutely everything in your life - that becomes obsessive after a while - but keep an eye on some of the major things that you might want to change in the future. Install apps on your phone and laptop that track how much time you spend doing what. Set up the step tracker on your phone. If you want to eat better in the future, start tracking roughly what you eat now. I’m a pretty avid bullet journaler, I track a lot of my daily habits. Keeping track of the things you do, even if you’re not proud of them, and even before you start to work on them, gives you a baseline to work with, so you can establish how bad the problem is and see when you’re heading in the right direction. 

Forget the obsession with monetizing. A lot of us have gotten this idea in our heads that we need to find ways to monetize everything that we’re even remotely good at, or doing that thing is somehow a waste of our time. I don’t want to generalize about millennials and gen z too much, but I do feel like our generation was raised on the belief that “doing what you love” is the most important thing in life; I personally have many friends that are obsessed with monetizing, to the point that they no longer do anything unless they can find some way to funnel it into advancing their blogger/influencer/creator career. I think this is a mistake. When you monetize something that you love doing, you turn it from a hobby into a job, with all the stress that comes with that, and I think it’s important for everyone to have at least one thing in their life that they do just for the joy of it. It’s okay to let work be work, and play just be play. And I say this as a person who has monetized one of my hobbies; I love true crime and forensic psychology, and I co-host a true crime podcast that has recently had a huge surge of popularity and is on the cusp of being monetized. I could write an entire post about the mental health side of being a creator with a public online presence, but in a nutshell, turning my podcast from a hobby into a business has required me to take it a lot more seriously, and it now falls more into the category of “work” than it does “fun”. My enjoyment of life requires that some of my other hobbies - like playing music - just stay un-monetized hobbies. Let yourself create and do things that don’t have economic value. 

Don’t compare yourself to what you see on social media. I have had both personal friends and followers on this blog tell me that they feel bad about themselves because their life doesn’t measure up to what they see on Instagram, or because they feel that their own lives would not be worthy of posting online. This is a toxic mindset to get into. The things you see on social media are not reality, no matter how much they appear to be - people put incredible amounts of effort into carefully cultivating an online persona that makes them look more productive and accomplished than they actually are. I have a brother who who is a somewhat successful Instagram “influencer”, alongside his more successful girlfriend, and I could write an entire post about the lengths they go to to fake having perfect lives on Instagram, and the toll that their Insta careers are having on their mental health. If you are looking to be a more productive version of yourself, it’s best to steer clear of “motivation” from people who are paid to pretend to be successful online. 

Set measurable, achievable goals. Goals like “be healthier” and “do more stuff” won’t get you anywhere - they are so vague that it’s not possible to tell when you’ve actually achieved them, or how much progress you’ve made. If you want to be more productive and feel like you’re getting more done, you need to set goals that can actually be worked towards and checked off when they are done. Instead of “go to the gym more”, aim for “go to the gym 5 days per week” as your end goal, and start with a solid couple of months with “go to the gym at least once per week”, and slowly increase from there. If you’re aiming for something big like “have an awesome job”, break that down into medium-sized goals like “finish an undergrad degree”, and then break that goal down even further into “hand in all my assignments on time this semester”, and break that down further into “write the first 10 pages of my paper by the end of the week”. Set tiny goals for yourself that you can easily achieve, and that will gradually accumulate into big accomplishments. 

Remember that slow progress is better than no progress. If you write one sentence per day, it is going to take you a really long time to write a novel. It will take you a whole lot less time, however, than if you get overwhelmed at the thought of writing a novel and never write at all. Sometimes you need to break goals down into steps so small that they also seem not worth doing. It can feel a little silly to congratulate yourself for things like “brushed my teeth today” and “texted someone back today”, but those are little habits that add up into bigger things, and giving yourself that positive reinforcement is important. “Greatness” and “success” are not things you achieve all at once, they are made up of tiny habits that you’ve been working on for months or years at a time. 

Take care of your mental health. Not feeling the motivation to do anything, even things that you enjoy, can be a symptom of depression. Everyone beats themselves up from time to time for not being more productive, but if your brain is constantly on a feedback loop of “I’m human garbage and I’m wasting my life”, that’s a pretty serious problem, and a solid sign that it’s time to seek out some professional help. Trying to make major life improvements without addressing underlying mental health concerns is kind of like trying to drive a car without wheels - you’re just not going to get anywhere until you’ve dealt with the obvious problem. 

Remember that setbacks are okay. Even the most highly proactive and high-functioning people have days where they say “fuck it” and order takeout to eat in front of the TV. Everyone occasionally misses deadlines or leaves things to the last minute when they shouldn’t. Everyone shows up late occasionally. These things happen - we are humans, and none of us are perfect. The key to long-term proactivity and productivity, though, is not to let those small setbacks define you, and not to throw away all the progress you’ve made over a bad day or a bad week. Eating healthy six days per week will put you in a much better position than deciding “fuck it, I blew it” after one bad meal and returning to eating unhealthy meals 7 days per week. As the saying goes, don’t let perfect be the enemy of good - in other words, perfection is not attainable, and getting hung up on being perfect will prevent you from achieving many things that are good. The idea is not to be perfect; it’s just to keep striving to be a slightly better version of yourself. 

Best of luck to you!