#long sincere conversation about their true feelings would also be pretty nice

[whitetulip25]

Thinking about how Aegon and Aemond are jealous of each other and are longing to be in each other's shoes - Aegon wants to be the second son so he can have freedom of action, and Aemond wants to be the firstborn so he can fully embrace his potential as a family protector and fulfill the "duty and sacrifice" thing that Alicent has been so thoroughly hammering into him since he was a child.

What catches my eye this season is that they are straight up mirroring each other. Aegon is an insecure, stiff-necked boy in a man's body, because of how new and fresh it all is for him, he's euphoric from everyone's love and support. He is king, he is on top, everyone obeys/should obey him.  It is on this euphoria that he takes on the royal duties; everything is easy and not that difficult for him so far. He's completely clueless about governance, doesn't know how to deal with the small council members (the same scene with Tyland the pony is cute, but it's pretty damn insensitive to Tyland and everyone else present), disdainfully calls Aemond a hound while drinking with his buddies, etc.  But what is striking is that he is desperate for love and recognition, and therefore tries to earn it with exorbitant generosity. He sincerely tries to please his subjects by distributing the last reserves in the treasury, appoints his friends to the post of royal guards and goes to brothels with them, just to feel like he belongs somewhere and earn the status of the Magnanimous.

With the death of Jaehaerys it is even more difficult for him, he finds himself completely isolated from the rest of the family and lives through his grief by his own, making more and more questionable decisions and undermining his authority in the eyes of others. It is this isolation from his family that exacerbates the situation, since it is successfully exploited by Larys, who's whispering lies about Alicent's and Aemond's plotting against him. Aegon is impulsive and angry, he wants to play by his own rules while being terribly insecure and afraid of making a mistake. The last straw for him is the conversation with Alicent, who with a careless word pushed him into making a fatal mistake so he rushed into battle to do something, release emotional tension, and to prove himself.

Another very interesting detail of his character is his rejection of Targaryenism. He doesn't like Valyrian culture, language, traditions (incest in particular), even rejects the external attributes of typical Targaryen image, e.g. (long hair) and wears an emphasized sloppy hairstyle (yes, I consider it as a protest against the system). Ironically, his closest creature is his dragon, the very symbol of the Targaryens.

Similarly to Aegon, Aemond is also a complex, insecure boy who nevertheless, has managed to build a flawless at first glance image of an unmoving statue. Because of the attitudes instilled in him from childhood, he is very focused on his heritage and very protective of what Aegon despises so much - about Valyrian culture, language, traditions. Who knows, maybe for that the gods rewarded him with Vhagar out of all dragons? Aemond clearly knows what he wants, knows how to present himself and is not afraid of making mistakes, simply because he believes it's impossible for him to make any. Like Aegon, he is crushed by the weight of responsibility (including for the war that was started by his mistake; yes, I think he felt pity not for Luke, but for himself), just like Aegon he is isolated from the rest of the family, he longs for love like Aegon does, but contrary to the latter he rigidly denies himself that need. The only thing he has are the visits to the Madame and milk of the poppy. Soon he denies himself even this, decides not to show his true nature to anyone and to become a lone wolf. He is still as impulsive and angry as his brother, but knows how to twist it all out in cold disdain and sophisticated mockery. He has everything calculated - he will be able to show himself from the best side, to earn recognition and get Alicent's love back. But there's one flaw - when things don't go according to plan, he gets lost and unravels his ire upon everything and everyone he can reach. And in the end, just like Aegon, in Rook's Rest he does what he does to relieve the tension and get something done, regardless of the consequences.

And their whole tragedy lies in just that. They essentially want the same thing, which is their mother's love and validation. They're yin and yang, two forces dependent on each other, destroying each other in the process of self-destruction.

Thinking about how they are so similar and yet so different at the same time, two sides of the same coin, who will never realize it because of their pride and rage.

[northern-passage]

If I remember right, we have to be the ones to bring up Keld with Lea? Like if we don't do that those two don't have a conversation about wanting to be better during the campfire scene. When you were writing that scene, did you ever think about having Lea bring it up without the Hunter needing to initiate the conversation, or were they always the stubborn, "I'd rather bottle all this up," Handler that we've come to know?

Lea actually used to have a completely different personality at the start - they really were meant to be "calm and collected." the original character that Lea was created from was also a part of a duo, and he was always the calm, slow-talking voice of reason - still a little stoic, but far more in touch with his emotions and far more sincere. i'm not sure what happened when i started writing tnp, but it is true what they say about characters having a mind of their own....

and you're right, they do only directly bring up Keld if the hunter brings it up first - otherwise they always just comment about it "being nice" which is basically them just saying "it's better than Keld."

however, Lea is the one to push about wanting to talk later at the tavern, quite literally forcing the hunter to agree to talk later in some variations. (or if you avoided the argument and agreed to be partners at the first choice, they mention wanting to talk after shaking hands)

actually it's potentially spoilery under here, i've avoided hinting at this for a while but 🤷 so i'm going to put it under a readmore. i'm not really sure how many people, if any, have thought too much about this lmfao

who is to say if Lea plans on keeping their word about having any kind of talk.... Lea knows they fucked up pretty badly in Keld, but they're not quite ready to admit that, not directly - and there are a few secrets they've been keeping for a long time. while i do think Lea likes the idea of the two of you talking it out, it's something that will be really difficult for them, and choosing to talk "later" was both them trying to convince the hunter but also themself - and give them time to figure out what the hell they're doing. to be clear, Lea does want the two of you to be better, they really do want to stay paired together not just for their reputation but because they genuinely want to make it work - i think i've made that obvious in a lot of the asks i've answered about them. but that still doesn't make it easy. i think i've also made it obvious that Lea is very stubborn, and is in a very difficult position (that they put themself in....) and they're trying to claw their way back out; and once they're out.... there's no guarantee they'll have changed.

for the talk to actually happen, i think it depends entirely on how the current job goes for them. this is Lea making a desperate gamble for two reasons: they know they fucked up at Keld, and they know there's something wrong with the hunter. they're anxious you're going to ask for a reassignment if this job doesn't go well, so they're propositioning you ahead of time in an attempt to keep it together (though they're too late for some hunters who ask for it anyways)

soooo..... to answer your question, Lea would not bring up Keld themself if they didn't have to. but due to how things are going with the hunter, they feel a bit cornered, so it's a bit of a hail mary - and we don't know how it's going to play out yet.

[katyasrussianaccent]

you’re so golden (corpse x reader)

Summary: You’re a faceless youtuber that sings cover songs. What happens when a certain faceless streamer slides into your DMs after you cover one of his songs?

Authors note: Part 3 whoop! I havent written fic in 3 years so Im hoping this is okay. Its about 4000 words, super long, sorry. I also dont play Among Us, but hopefully its not too obvious. Lemme know what you think!

You're nervous, though you aren’t quite sure why. The kind of nervousness that spreads to your feet, causing you to tap your toes against the side of your sofa.

Call you in 15. 

You look at the message again, staring at it till the screen goes blurry. Rubbing your eyes you exhale into the emptiness of your apartment; a feeble attempt at calming yourself down.

Logically it’s stupid to be nervous over a phone call. Logically you know that in the grand scheme of the universe, there are bigger things at hand. But you’re not a logical person, never have been. You’re all heart and emotion, both a blessing and a curse. There’s something intimate about a phone call, to have nothing but someone’s voice on the other end of the phone, talking to you and only you. It was a little scary; to think your purely online friendship with Corpse was going to be taken to a different level. You’re excited to think what that could mean.

“Fucking get it together,” you mutter to no-one as you exhale again, because there’s nothing else to do other than to wait and try to breath. There’s this frantic energy about you; like when you eat fizzy sweets, the flavour buzzing on your tongue. Your ancestors used to hunt wolves and here you were nervous over a single phone call.

The silence in your apartment’s too much now; too noisy. You grab your TV remote, clicking onto Spotify to find something. You’re scrolling so much, none of the artists feeling quite right for the moment before settling on Sufjan Stevens.

The dulcet tones fill the space, and for a brief second, you feel fine. You’re feeling relaxed and then your phone lights up.

Incoming Facetime Audio

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck” you say. Your face feels warm, your heart quickens in your chest. You could just ignore it, say you’re not feeling too good and that would be that, you wouldn’t have to do this. But it’s Corpse, you like Corpse and you’re kind of friends.

You swipe to accept the call, and press the button for speaker. 

“Hey,” you say, cringing at the meek tone your voice has taken on.

“Hey,” Corpse’s deep voice rumbles through your tiny speaker, distorting slightly and you press the volume button to turn it down a little.

There’s a beat of silence, a beat too long, and you already hate how awkward this is. You’re not great at social stuff, the concept of being a social butterfly is almost foreign to you. And it’s not because you dislike people, it’s just you hate this; the small talk, the awkwardness before you get comfortable and can hold an actual conversation.

You suddenly remember a tip from your customer service days. “How are you?” you ask, plastering on a grin so wide that it must look borderline demented. Thank god you’re single. 

“I’m okay thanks, how are you?” he asks.

You lounge back against the soft cushions of the sofa, lifting the phone up to your mouth as you do so. “I’m good, excited to be taught by the Among Us master.”

He snorts in disdain. “Hardly a master.” 

You chew your lip before you speak again, “I dunno, people on the internet think you’re pretty good.”

He snorts again, and you smile at the sound. It’s not something you’ve heard from him before, through your hours of watching his streams, you’ve become accustomed to his voice and the noises he makes. But this one seems to be new. And maybe it’s the weird, selfish part of you that likes to think he’s only ever made that sound for you. You shake the thought out of your head, because really? Getting happy over a snort is really such a ridiculous thing to do. 

“People on the internet say a lot of things.”

“True, but sometimes they speak the truth,” you reply, moving to get more comfortable; tucking your feet under your thighs. You wonder what he’s doing right now as he talks to you, is he sitting down? Or is he lying on his bed; his head propped up with pillows? There’s a brief flash of yearning, of wanting to be there in the same room as him, but it disappears as quickly as it appeared so you ignore it.

“Hm. We’ll agree to disagree.”

“Okay, you’re the boss Mr Husband.”

He chuckles softly, and again, you smile. You can feel yourself getting annoyed with yourself; you’re acting like a child with a crush; smiling at the phone. All you needed now was a notebook that had Mrs YN Husband written all over it.

“You know if you keep calling me that, we’re gonna have to get married,” he says, his voice a little lower than it was before. You blink and cock your head to the side, looking at an imaginary camera like you’re in The Office. Did you say that out loud? Is he...flirting with you? Sure, you’re flirty over Twitter, but it’s Twitter, Twitter isn’t real. There’s a fluttery feeling in your stomach at the mere prospect that he might actually be flirting with you.

“I’d be the best wife you could ever get,” you shoot back. There’s a brief second of silence before he answers, and you can hear shuffling on the other end. You want to ask what he’s doing, but you know it would break the conversation, and you’re curious to see where this goes.

“Oh really? And why’s that?” he asks, and you can picture the smirk in his voice. You have no idea what he looks like, no real care about it either, but you bet he’s got a beautiful smile. You bite your tongue before it tells him this, for once your brain actually works and stops you from making a fool out of yourself. It’s incredibly strange, how quickly he puts you at ease without a try, he’s just so naturally comforting. He’s not this flashy persona, he’s just a guy who likes to play video games and happens to be kinda good at them. And also has a voice that is literally like chocolate. Not just chocolate; dark chocolate. If dark chocolate could talk, it would sound like Corpse.

“Cos your girl can cook,” you say proudly, puffing out your chest a little. And that’s not a lie, you can cook. Okay, you’re not a Michelin starred chef, but you feel quite confident in the fact that Gordon Ramsey could eat your food, and probably (hopefully) wouldn’t scream that it was “fucking raw”. 

“And what would you cook for me?” he asks. 

You hum in thought for a second. “You’ll have to marry me first to find that out.”

He laughs, a proper laugh that settles in your stomach, spreading warmth through your chest. “I’ll think about it. I can hear music, what are you listening to?”

You straighten up a little, the question catching you off guard. You bite the inside of your cheek as you look at the song that’s playing. It’s not his type of music, you’re almost positive about that. You almost don’t want to tell him out of embarrassment. You’re not sure why you feel embarrassed; you know Corpse isn’t an asshole, he wouldn’t make fun of you. But music is so personal to you, so personal, it’s like baring a piece of your soul; which sounds so fucking cliche, but it’s true.

“Uhhh...It’s called Make out in My Car by Sufjan Stevens,” you reply.

He hums in affirmation. “It sounds nice; from what I can hear.”

“I can turn it up?” you ask, leaning forward to grab the remote off the coffee table.

“You could always sing some for me,” he offers. 

You laugh a little, scrunching up your nose. “And why would I do that?”

“I thought you wanted to get married. You have to woo me,” he replies.

“Woo you?” you ask, your tone incredulous. This isn’t how you pictured the conversation going.

“Yeah. Woo me, yn.” he says, dragging out the “o” causing you to laugh again.

You sigh dramatically. “I haven’t warmed up or anything, it’s gonna sound so bad” you warn as you put the song to the beginning.

“I’m sure you sound great. Go ahead, woo me.” 

You shake your head as you softly sing. “I'm not trying to go to bed with you, I just wanna make out in my car. And though I'm dying to fall in love with you, I just wanna make out in my car”. You stop and you’re suddenly very aware that you have essentially just serenaded him. Good going, brain.

It’s silent for a beat too long, and the smile that graced your lips starts to fade as the embarrassment starts to set in. 

“Well now we definitely have to get married,” he affirms. And there’s that fluttery feeling again.

You swallow, moving the conversation swiftly onto Among Us. You grab your laptop that was next to you, humming in acknowledgement as he walks you through downloading it. 

“So there’s a few of us joining us tonight, it should be really fun.”

“Oh. It’s not just us two?” you ask. You focus on the download, watching the number increase. You’re nervous at the prospect of playing with other people, strangers, for the first time. 

“No, it’s a 4 player minimum. We’re going to stream as well.”

“Corpse…” you start. You begin to pick at the skin around your nails, a habit you do whenever you get really anxious. This was meant to just be a cute moment where you learnt how to play a game, not a big event where people would be actually watching you, judging your every move.

“We’re going to do a few games off stream with you, you don’t need to be there for the stream after if you don’t want to,” he interrupts. 

“Okay,” you trail off, your teeth biting down on your bottom lip. You feel a little better, but not by much. You didn’t know who the other people were, what if they hated you? You ask this out loud.

“I’ll be there. You know Rae and Sykkuno. Felix, Sean and Toast will be there but they’re super nice, I promise.” His voice is sincere, and it soothes you. You don’t know him, not really know him, but you trust Corpse. You know he has his own struggles, and you believe his promise; he wouldn’t screw you over or put you in a situation you were uncomfortable with.

The rest of the call is him taking you through how to play and how to set up something called Proximity Chat so everyone can talk to each other in the game. He says it’s easier once you actually play, and it doesn’t sound particularly hard quite honestly, you just hope you don’t get imposter on the first try because you’re not the greatest liar. 

The game screen pops up, and you type in the code that Corpse gives you. You say goodbye to Corpse, who tells you to text him if you need any help. You drop into the game lobby, and you look at the little astronaut. There’s no time to dwell as a cacophony of voices hits you.

“YN!” Rae screeches and you chuckle at her enthusiasm. You’ve known Rae for a few years now, you met at college and had become fast friends. Though you had many different interests - gaming for one, you considered her your best friend. Rae was the type of friend where you didn’t need to talk every single day, you could message her a week later and it would be like no time had passed at all. And you loved that, sometimes you just didn’t want to talk to anyone. Sometimes your mood wasn’t the best, and you needed a little time to recharge. And she understood that, something that you were eternally grateful for. 

“Raebies!” you screech back, using your “pet” name for her.

“I’ve been trying to get you to play forever. But Mr Smooth Operator over there slides into your DMs and suddenly you’re a gamer now?”

“It sounds so sordid when you say it like that,” you reply.

“Hi yn! Glad to see you playing with us,” Sykkuno says. You greet him and the others, making sure to say hi to everyone in the game. You didn’t want to start off by being accidentally rude. You listen as everyone talks amongst each other, and you talk when spoken to, but you aren’t interjecting. It wasn’t anything against the other players, it was just a little overwhelming, and you were figuring out what everyone was like.

“Hello,” Corpse’s voice interrupts your train of thought and you greet him along with everyone else. 

“Aw, I wanted purple,” you say, frowning at Corpse’s name above the astronaut.

“We can switch,” he replies.

“No it’s o -” you start to speak before you realise he’s already switched to white. “Thank you, you didn’t have to.” You smile as you switch to purple, and you decide to add a flower for a little pizzazz.

“It’s your first game, I’ll kill you if I get imposter so it’ll even out,” he jokes and everyone laughs. The countdown begins and you puff your cheeks out, exhaling as it gets to 1. You’re nervous again, a seemingly common theme of the night. Your shoulders relax as the word CREWMATE flashes across the screen.

You watch as everyone but Corpse disperses from the cafeteria with haste, and you look at the keyboard to press the buttons to move.

“You ever see an old person text? That’s how I’m picturing you right now,” Corpse says as you walk together to Weapons.

“Shut up Sonny,” you reply in your best old woman voice, getting a laugh. You open up the task, shooting the Asteroids with ease. “Yay, I completed a task!”

“Good job,” Corpse replies, and you beam at the praise. You move down to o2, doing your task while Corpse does his.

“Wait, you could be imposter right? How would I know?” you ask as you walk together to Navigation.

“You wouldn’t, you just have to trust me,” he says, his voice full of charm.

You scowl. “Well that just makes me not want to trust you.” 

Before he replies, there’s a blaring alarm. DEAD BODY REPORTED. You blink at the suddenness; you were really enjoying the relaxing pace of the game. You look at the screen;  Felix has been killed.

“Who found the body?” Corpse asks.

“I did,” Rae answers. “I was in admin, and was going to lower engine and it was there in storage.”

“If you were in admin, why didn’t you go up through Cafeteria?” Toast asks.

“Because it’s quicker to go through storage,” Rae replies. They argue between themselves, and you listen intently and silently. It’s a lot of information, you can’t tell whose lying, but you guess that’s what makes a good player.

“Where were you yn?” Sean quizzes, and it takes you a second to realise you’re being spoken to.

“Oh. I was in um o2?”

“You don’t sound too sure there, pretty sus,” he says. Your face heats up a little, you’re not the imposter, but it feels like you are.

“She was in o2 and then we went to Navigation,” Corpse answers, and you breathe out as he takes on the interrogation.

“Oh you were together?” Rae asks, and you know that tone she’s got. It’s the tone that says she’ll be messaging you right away.

“Well yeah, it’s her first game, I’m not gonna leave her alone,” he says and you smile at that. 

“Yeah we’ve been together the whole time,” you add and it’s left at that. No-one votes anyone out, since no-ones really too suspicious. You carry on the game, and you find yourself really enjoying it, though the questioning part is kind of stressful. You can see why Corpse likes it so much, it’s really fun. You’re in electrical, humming as you do your task when Rae comes next to you. 

“Hey,” you greet her.

“I’m sorry, nothing personal,” she replies. Before you have a chance to say a word, she kills you and you look on in shock as your ghost floats above your body.  You listen into the meeting as Rae continues to lie and plead her case. She’s good, but Corpse knows better.

“Wait, you said you found her in electrical and you were where?” 

“I was in Upper Engine, and then I went to electrical to do my task,” Rae answers, her voice even and calm.

“I was in Lower Engine, and I didn’t see you,” Corpse says, and you grin at the fact Rae’s been found out. That’s what she gets for killing you.

“You were doing your task, I passed right by you,” Rae starts. She pleads her case, but it’s too late and she’s voted out.

“That was so much fun!” you declare. “I can see why you guys play it all the time.”

“Yes! We have converted another!” Felix shouts in victory.

“And all it took was Corpse,” Rae mutters sarcastically.

“Don’t get bitter Rachel, just get better,” you reply, causing the group to laugh.

You get the hang of it after a few games, and find yourself agreeing to stay while the others stream, though you decide against it yourself. You’ve only streamed once by yourself, and it was a very casual affair and you don’t want to feel too much pressure while you enjoy yourself. You know that Corpse gets nervous when he streams and he’s been doing it for so much longer, so you can only imagine how nervous you would be.

You tap your fingernails against the keyboard as the lobby counts down, any previous nerves have been replaced with excitement. 

IMPOSTER flashes across. You’re the only one, your astronaut looks lonely on the screen by itself, and the red letters almost taunt you. 

“Shit,” you mutter as your brain goes into overdrive. What was it Corpse had said before? Not to be too obvious. You don’t kill immediately, instead going at your previous pace to not look too suspicious. You were still fairly new to the game, and you were going to use that to your advantage.

You fake your task in Cafeteria before venting over to Navigation where Toast was.

“Hi Toast!” you greet, coming to stand next to him as you pretend you’re doing the task. 

“Oh hey yn,” he says. It doesn’t seem like he suspects you, and you’re not quite sure when to click the Kill button. You do it anyway before running out and going down and into shields. There’s adrenaline running through you as the dead body’s reported and you crack your knuckles before putting on your game face. You were going to play dumb, play the confused newbie - because to them, that’s what you were. 

“YN, where were you?” Corpse asks. Fuck. Maybe you weren’t going to get away with this.

You twiddle your hair as you draw out your words, playing the role perfectly. “Uhm I was in...shields? I think that’s what it’s called. I was in the cafeteria before that though.”

“Wait, you couldn’t have, I was in weapons. I would have seen you,” Sykkuno says.

You open your mouth to talk. “She could have vented,” Felix comments, and the rest of the group starts to agree.

“Guys, I don’t even know what venting is. I literally just started playing,” you point out, giggling.

“That’s true,” Rae agrees and you knew there was a reason you loved her.

“Bullshit! She’s playing you with her “oh I don’t know how to play” schtick,” Felix proclaims.

“Aw, that’s kind of rude, Felix. I’m just enjoying the game, doing the tasks,” you say, pouting a little. He’s the next on your list. 

Everyone skips the vote and you lean over your laptop, ready for the next round. You were going to win this. You kill Rae and Toast next, and yet again, manage to worm your way out of any suspicion. You can sense that Corpse and Felix are starting to get suspicious of you, and you know you need to bring out the big guns to throw them off.

You catch Sykkuno in Med Bay after checking the cams in Security.

“Hi yn!” he greets, and you almost feel guilty as you kill him. He’s so sweet and innocent, but unfortunately, casualties are a given. You pass Felix as he comes out of reactor and it’s only a matter of time before you’ll have to talk your way out of this one again.

“I passed yn as I came out of reactor,” Felix shouts with a hint of glee.

You roll your eyes; this is going to be tough. “Yeah I came from Upper Engine, I was finishing part 2 of a task.”

“I was in Electrical, where was the body?” Corpse asks.

“Med Bay. And the only one that could’ve been there was yn,” Felix starts.

“Well no, you could have passed me and killed Sykkuno then self reported,” you reply. “I think you can do that right?” 

Corpse hums in agreement. “Oh come on! She’s being really sus,” Felix argues.

“You are being a little sus yn,” Corpse comments.

“Corpse. You don’t really think it’s me do you?” You decide to lower your voice a little, your tone sweet but sultry. “You only taught me like an hour ago, there’s no way I’d be able to fool everybody so quickly.” You get close to the mic so it’s like you’re speaking only to Corpse. “Remember what I said? You’re a master at this.” You’re laying it on thick, and for a brief second you think you’ve been too over the top.

“This is difficult,” Corpse says, and you see the seconds count down, your heartbeat starts to quicken.

“Corpse, stop being a fucking simp and vote her out!” Felix demands.

“Corpsie baby,” you drawl out and you smile in success as you hear him sigh, almost shakily. You’ve got this in the bag. The victory screen flashes up and you cheer.

“Fuck yeah!” you shout, patting yourself on the back. You laugh as you exhale the breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“Good game yn!” Sykkuno comments, the others agreeing.

“Not fair, you used your womanly wiles against Corpse,” Felix says.

“Gotta use them for something. Not my fault Corpse knows where his allegiance lies,” you reply laughing a little.

You stretch, your back crying out in pain from being hunched over so long. You let out a long, loud moan of relief as you straighten your spine, your shoulders relaxing as you move from side to side.

“Your mic’s not muted” Corpse points out, clearing his throat. You feel your stomach drop and your face instantly becomes hot. Shit. 

“Oh. Uh. I totally forgot about that,” you say, forcing out a chuckle. You screw your eyes shut, any happiness has been now replaced by red hot shame. “So this was fun, uh, really fun, but um, I’m gonna, I’m gonna go. So...yeah. Bye guys, have fun!” 

You click to exit without giving anyone a chance to say a word, and drop your head into your hands. 

“Can’t wait to see what they say on Twitter about this,” you mutter into your hands.

TAGLIST (if youre bold, it wont let me tag): @teenageguitarist @fanworrior  @cherry-piee @mirahg  @clara-bee @cookinglovingalien @vir-tual @clubfairy @youretheonlyonewhomakesme @more-like-reyna @boiled-onionrings @moneybagmgk @brendalopez99 @delicateavenuenacho @dreamsofficialwife @hydrate-tion @little-red02 

[mxbeezkneez]

Graveyard Companions

Chapter 2: i'm coming back from the dead, and i'll take you home with me

Link to ao3: x

Warnings: Blood, Minor Injury, Cursing

Fandoms: The Addams Family

Relationships: Gomez Addams/Morticia Addams, Gomez Addams/Morticia Addams/Reader, Gomez Addams/Reader, Morticia Addams/Reader

Tags: Vampire, Vampire Turning, Human/Vampire Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Married Couple, Blood, Polyamory, Eventual Romance, Eventual Relationship, Pre Relationship, Cursing

Summery: “I’m a vampire… a goddamn vampire,” you whisper.You wake up in the living room of a gothic house, and are told you were found unconscious in a graveyard. They claim you are a vampire. As crazy as it is, you can't help but start to trust the couple who found you.

Chapter notes: hi i'm back! i started thinking about the addams family, and well my interest in vampires didn't rlly diminish much... this chapter's pretty long, so i hope you enjoy! i apologize if my french or spanish is bad, i don't speak french, and i only speak a bit of spanish! i actually have like a whole plot n stuff planned, so i'm pretty hyped for this fic! hope u like it! :) (the title is from it's not a fashion statement, it's a fucking death wish by my chemical romance)

You wake up to a loud bang, bolting straight up out of bed. “What the hell?”

You rub your eyes before slipping out of bed. The night before feels very far away, almost unreal, but being in this room confirms your memories. You’re staying in the Addams’ house and are… a vampire. You take a slow breath before grabbing new clothing. You find a pair of black pants to match a dark sweater. While near the dresser, you look out of the room’s window. It’s dark outside, the sky a navy blue sprinkled with stars. The graveyard behind the house is illuminated by the moon shining over it.

You leave your room, deciding to try and find the living room once again. You wander through the halls before finding it. Inside you find Wednesday, the small girl, playing with a younger blond boy. She’s talking to him while holding a headless doll in her arms. You walk farther into the room, stepping on a squeaky board, alerting the children of your presence.

They both turn their heads to stare at you. You nervously chuckle.

Wednesday points at you, “That’s (y/n),” she tells the boy, “I heard father say they’re a vampire.”

“Wow really?” the boy exclaims, “Is it true? Do you drink blood?”

“Um,” you stammer, “Well, I am a vampire, but I haven’t been one very long so- no I haven’t drank any blood. Uh… what’s your name again?”

“I’m Pugsley,” he reaches over and offers his hand.

You shake it, “Well, nice to meet you Pugsley. What are you guys up to?”

“We’re playing the French Revolution,” Wednesday answers flatly.

You chuckle, “Huh. I mean I guess it was an exciting time. Who’s your doll there?” you point to the headless doll in her hands. To be honest, the beheaded doll was very unnerving, but the children themselves seemed nice enough, so you push your nerves to the side.

“Marie Antoinette” she says matter of factly.

“Oh,” you pause, “Explains the lack of head I guess.”

You stand there awkwardly for a moment, unsure of how to exit the conversation. “Do either of you know where your parents are?” you ask.

“I saw them in the dining room earlier. Uncle Fester was there, but I think he went upstairs to play with his dynomite caps,” Pugsley replies. Uncle Fester? Dynomite caps? There’s too much to unpack there, so instead you decide to find Gomez and Morticia.

“Okay, thanks.”

You head out the door, realizing you have no idea where the dining room is. You go to turn back, but the children are playing animatedly and you don’t want to interrupt, so instead you look for it yourself.

You find the dining room, and sure enough, Gomez and Mortica are seated next to each other at a long table. You walk over and take a seat near them.

“(Y/n)! How’d you sleep?” Gomez greets you.

“Like the dead,” you say flatly. A second later what you’ve said hits you and you blink slowly, “I mean, I slept well, thanks.”

“You did seem rather tired last night,” Morticia remarks, “I’m glad you got some rest.”

“Wait, did I sleep through an entire day?” you ask.

“Yes, though we did tell Lurch not to disturb you,” she answers, “We thought you needed the sleep. How are you feeling?”

“I feel…” you take a moment to survey yourself, “I feel okay. I think if anything I feel a little hungry.”

“We can get that squared away! Mama makes the best yak stew.” Gomez springs from his chair and over to a rope hanging from the ceiling. Remembering last night, you brace for a loud noise. Sure enough, once he pulls it, the house shakes as the ringing travels through the house.

“You rang,” Lurch grumbles.

“Yes Lurch, a bowl of yak stew for our guest!” Lurch groans and exits.

“Thank you,” you tell them, “You’ve both been very hospitable, I’m thankful you were the ones that found me.” You feel sincerity in that statement, you were not only grateful for their help, but another part of you has some feeling when you’re near them. You’re not sure what the feeling is, though you can confidently say you didn’t mind the couple, or hell, the weird household in general. Even if it is kooky, you can’t say you’re not charmed by their life.

Lurch comes back with a silver platter that he sets on the table. On it is a bowl of stew that he places in front of you.

“Thanks,” you say, before grabbing the spoon and looking back at the meal. Lurch takes his leave. You’re unsure about eating yak, but you are also hungry and the stew looks fairly appetizing. You take a scoop and put it in your mouth, surprised not only by the flavor of the soup, but also the feeling of chewing. It’s like you can feel your canines rip through the meat faster than before. In the time where you’ve been thinking, it’s completely slipped your mind that you probably have fangs now. That you’ve changed.

“This is- this is actually really good,” you remark.

“I told you, Mama is a culinary genius! Nothing beats her yak stew!” Gomez gleams.

You smile at Gomez. Something about him just makes you want to smile in a soft admission of admiration.

You turn your attention back to the stew, eating it quickly until there is nothing left.

“I’m glad you enjoyed Mama’s cooking,” Morticia smiles, “I’ll have to tell her you enjoyed it. It’s not very often she gets to feed guests.”

“It is very odd, usually most people never come back after eating her food… I can’t imagine why…” Gomez says with a puzzled expression on his face. You chuckle. You notice that you find yourself enjoying the Addams’ company immensely. A part of you feels sad that you will eventually have to leave.

“Ah, c'est la vie (that’s life) ,” Morticia remarks.

“Tish!” Gomez’s head swivels quickly to face her, “That’s French!” he exclaims, grabbing her arm. He begins to kiss it, from her hand to her shoulder, though is interrupted by Morticia, “Darling. We have company. Later,” she says with a sly grin. Gomez raises his head to meet her eyes, a dazed look on his face. “Later.” he remarks, before finding himself back in his seat, “So, Hester, any plans for the night?” he asks casually.

“Um…” you stutter, flustered by the show of passion from the man sitting across from you, “I- I don’t really know… I mean, I’m a vampire now so- does that mean I have to act like one too? I’ve never been in a situation like this, I don’t really know what to do,” you admit, staring at your hands. You look up towards Morticia, “Didn’t you mention you’ve known vampires before? Could you maybe help me?”

“Of course, darling.” Morticia says, “Why don’t we talk in the living room? If you’re alright with it, the children would enjoy listening, they are curious creatures.”

“Yeah, that’s alright. They asked me a question or two when I ran into them earlier. I don’t blame them for being curious,”

“Pugsley’s been very interested in nonhuman creatures lately, ever since that run in with that werewolf he’s been wanting to know more. Wednesday’s been teaching him some things, she’s always had a firm grasp on certain folklore!” Gomez said proudly.

The three of you walked to the living room and sat down, them on the couch, and you in a chair facing them. The children were still in the room, sitting on the floor. You fidget with your hands nervously. “So, do I have superpowers or anything now?” you half-heartedly joke.

“Vampires have very fast healing capabilities,” Wednesday states, “They are very difficult to kill, they must be stabbed with a stake to the heart or decapitated.”

“Very good Wednesday,” Morticia smiles.

“Huh,” you respond, “Alright, that’s not too bad.”

“There are certain weaknesses that should be mentioned, such as sunlight, garlic, crucifixes and running water.” Morticia adds.

“Wait I can’t eat garlic anymore?” you ask, “That kinda sucks, huh.”

“Well technically you can eat anything if you try hard enough,” Gomez says offhandedly.

Morticia cocks an eyebrow at him and sighs, “It’s not so much deadly, it’s more like a food allergy.”

“So I can still eat things with garlic in it?” you double check.

“As long as you aren’t a coward!” Gomez says enthusiastically.

You let out a laugh at Gomez. Wednesday is rolling her eyes, though Morticia just keeps looking at him lovingly. For a moment you forget about the obvious question hanging in the air.

“So…” you start, “I have to drink blood now?” you ask nervously.

“Yes, all vampires must ingest blood to keep themselves alive,” Morticia says, “You’ve got to be hungry by now I imagine,”

“Yeah… but I just ate.” you reply.

“You can still eat food, it just will never fill you. In order not to starve you have to drink blood.” she explains.

You look down at your shaking hands. Everything before now had felt unreal, but this? The seriousness in her voice is making everything too real for you. How could you possibly do that to someone?

“I- I don’t know if I can do that…” you voice shakes, “I mean- how… how could I?”

“Children,” Morticia addresses them, “Why don’t you go play with Uncle Fester while we talk with Hester.”

“Awwww, do we have to?” Pugsley complains.

“A vampire’s eating habits are quite personal Pugsley. I’m afraid so.”

“Alright,” he sighs and follows Wednesday out of the room.

“If you need help procuring someone, you just have to ask. Gomez and I would of course be willing to provide.”

“Provide…?”

“Bodies of course.” Gomez affirms.

“Human bodies,” you repeat, your mind reeling. You had noticed the family was quite odd, even creepy at times, but what they were offering? It sounded too close to murder. You suddenly become very aware of where you are: in a strange house with strangers. Your hands become clammy.

“Is everything alright darling?” you hear Morticia ask. Your throat swells up. You try to force words out, but nothing will leave you lips, leaving you in what is now panic. Finally something spills out, “You can’t kill people for me! You- you can’t!” you sputter out.

“Kill people?” Gomez repeats, “Why we’d bring them alive of course.”

You let out a breath, “Okay, alive. I mean- I just still don’t think I can…”

“Well I suppose there is another option,” Gomez adds.

“What? What is it?” you ask, hopeful.

“Animal blood! It doesn’t work as well, but it’ll do in a pinch.” he explains.

You perk up, “I can do that. That works.” you feel relief.

“Should we make some arrangements? The children could fetch some for tonight.” Morticia asks.

“You have been so kind, really. I would appreciate it, at least for tonight. Tomorrow I’ll work on leaving, I’ve been here long enough.”

“It’s been our pleasure,” Gomez responds, lighting a cigar, “It’s been so long since we’ve had guests.

“Well you certainly are great hosts,” you smile. Despite your situation, you’ve found yourself fairly comfortable here.

“Thank you,” Morticia says, “Now, we ought to ring for Lurch to get some blood. I’m sure the children would love to accompany him.” As she reaches for the bell, you ready yourself for the loud ring. Lurch walks in, “You rang?”

“Yes Lurch, could you gather the children and find some animal blood for our guest here?”

“Yes, Mrs. Addams,” he drawls. He leaves the room in search of the children. A quiet silence falls over the room. Deciding to strike up conversation, you pipe up a question, “So, when did you two meet?”

“Oh, on the best day of my life,” Gomez grins proudly,

“We met at a funeral,” Mortica explains, “It was a lovely day. Grey clouds filled the sky, thunder rolling in the distance.”

“Oh cara mia, I remember it like it was yesterday, our eyes meeting over the coffin,” Gomez starts, “I swear the whole funeral party had to be half as enchanted with you as I had been.” You notice the two of them becoming more enveloped in their memories of each other. You can’t help but smile at how truly in love they are, even if that love meant that you would sit there awkwardly wondering if they were going to just make out in front of you.

“Oh mon cher, you are as charming as you were back then.”

Gomez’s eyes dart up, “Tish! That’s French!” He grabs her arm and starts kissing it.

“Gomez darling,” she warns, “Later.”

He looks up dazed, “Oh yes, our guest. Where were we?” he asks.

“I think you’ve answered my question,” you smile awkwardly.

“Do you have anyone special back home?” Morticia asks politely.

“Well…” you begin to explain“There is this one guy, my roomate, I guess… but I don’t think he likes me like that.” you explain.

“Tiene que estar loco si no le gusta, eres muy guapo. (He must be crazy if he doesn’t like you, you are very handsome.) ” Gomez comments under his breath. You feel your face heat up. He must not know you speak Spanish, judging by how offhandedly he said it. You look over to Morticia who nods ever so slightly, making you even more flustered.

“Uh… gracias, pero… sabes que hablo Español, sí? (Uh… thank you, but… you know I can speak Spanish, yes?) ” you ask. Gomez’s hand, which was placed on Morticia’s knee, now grips it somewhat tightly. Morticia looks over to him in curiosity. His face seems flushed.

“¿Comprendes lo que yo digo? (You understand what I’m saying?) ” he asks tentatively.

“Sí, aprendí a hablar en Español en la escuela. (Yes, I learned to speak in Spanish in school.) ”

“Oh,” a breath leaves his mouth. His eyes keep darting back and forth like he doesn’t know what to do. You can tell his weight has registered onto the balls of his chair like he is about to leap off his seat, but something is keeping him grounded. You look back at Morticia, who seems about as intrigued as you. A heavy silence fell over the room as everyone sat on edge.

Breaking the awkward scene, Lurch walks in with heavy footsteps holding a platter, “Your blood.”

He sets the platter down on the table, removing the lid. On the platter is a wine glass with a dark red liquid in it. As soon as you see the glass you can smell it, the blood. Rather than smelling rancid, the metallic scent smelled like everything you could ever want. You quickly grab the glass with both hands and hold it up to your lips, gulping down the liquid. The taste of it floods your mouth, though some of it dribbles down to your chin as you frantically consume it. You drink the last drop and set down the glass, looking up.

“Shit,” you curse under your breath. You wipe off your chin with the back of your sleeve. “Sorry, I- I don’t know what came over me.”

“It’s quite alright,” Morticia affirms, “You’ve just been turned, I’m surprised you’ve gone this long without blood… well I guess there was last night.” You wince at the mention of that encounter. Trying to change the subject, you ask, “What happens if I can’t get blood?”

“Well, either you go to any length to get it out of pure hunger, or if you don’t, you die,” Morticia explains, “So it’s best you feed regularly.”

“So is that why I…” you try to think of a way to phrase it, “Why I don’t feel much restraint when I see blood?”

“Yes, though you’ll get more constraint as it goes on.”

“Oh, okay. By the way, I’m not keeping you up, am I? It has to be pretty late. I mean, I guess I’m already a night owl, so this isn’t too unusual for me, but you two probably should sleep, right?” you ask.

“If you don’t mind, I would like to get some sleep. Perhaps tomorrow if you plan on leaving, we can help you get back?” she asks.

“Yeah, that’d be great. And of course, go get some sleep. I’ll just hang out for a bit.” you say, putting on a small smile.

“Alright, good night then,” Mortica says.

“Goodnight Hester.” Gomez says.

“Goodnight.”

You stay in the living room much longer after they leave, lost in your thoughts. The weight of your new life- or death has started to sink in. Your mind drifts to drinking the blood earlier. The feeling of it had been great, though immediately after your chest felt heavy. You don’t suppose it has anything to do with your newfound changes. No, instead you recognize the feeling as the weight of your guilt.

You can’t help but wonder what kind of creature feeds off the life force of others. You try to reason with yourself by saying it’s like eating animals, yet you can’t accept the notion. This had felt different. Looking back to having Morticia’s blood makes your face flush, but you can’t also help but notice the difference from tonight. While the animal blood was good, and mostly filling, Morticia’s blood, human blood, brought a type of euphoria.

You didn’t need Morticia to spell it out for you. Using animal blood works as a substitute, but you know deep down you are now meant to feed on humans. The realization hits you as you think that. You are no longer human. On this thought your heart aches. What does this make you. Confused? Scared? Yes, those both applied. You feel lost.

You feel anxious thinking about going home tomorrow. Going home means it’s real. It means you have to face your roommate who you’re in love with and somehow not let him know you’re a vampire. You let out a huff. God, how are you supposed to do this? You take a small amount of solace knowing you have the Addam’s help. You’re glad they’ll help you get back home, you don’t think you could do it alone. You know even if you never speak to them again, their impact will be left on you forever.

You get up off the couch, deciding to go to sleep. You trudge to your room and plop onto the bed with a sigh. Eventually you drift off to sleep.

[glowingbadger]

May I request a Dedue with a quiet (and observant) s/o who has little to no confidence with themselves? Whatever you're in the mood to write is fine with me! ~🌺

Dedue! What a sweetie <3 And definitely the only Blue Lion I haven't written about here yet, so let's change that~

Dedue (FE3H) x GN Reader Headcanons

SFW (not sfw below the cut)

- Dedue's love language is both a blessing and a curse for our lovely shy Reader. On the one hand, it's a relief that he's not going to smother you with half-sincere praise or extravagant gifts; but on the other, as his feelings for you deepen, he instead just wants to be around you more often, keep an eye on you and quietly ensure your safety and comfort. It can be easy to read this as him "just being friendly," so there will be a loooong phase of mutual pining- him just floundering to come up with a way to be more forthcoming with you, and you assuming at every turn that there's no way someone as put-together, serious, and not to mention handsome has fallen for you.

- One gesture that may finally make it through to you is that he makes a habit of cutting one bloom of your favorite flower from the greenhouse and gifting it to you, always remembering to bring you a fresh one when the last begins to wilt. Finally. once he'd decided that he can't risk allowing his true feelings to go unsaid, he brings you to the gardens and presents you with a full bouquet of those same flowers- "I am not skilled with words, but I have realized I would come to regret it if you never heard the truth of my feelings. That truth is that each time I've gifted you this flower, it was to say that I have fallen in love with you."

- He's insistent of course that he doesn't expect you to return his affections, and that he believes it would only cause you undue stress and persecution to be with someone of his background- and when you tell him that you do in fact return his feelings, that you'd hoped to be with him for some time, it takes a long while and a lot of reassurance for him to believe that you're truly willing to accept certain risks to be together. When all is said and done, and you're both a quietly flustered mess, grappling with excitement and joy and relief and a little anxiety, it all feels so overwhelming and too good to be true.

- After this, your relationship is a wonderfully sweet and supportive one. He's a quiet and sometimes insecure type himself, so he very much empathizes with your feelings, and does all that he can to reassure you of the depth and strength of his affections. Spending time with him is endlessly soothing and reassuring, whether you're helping him with chores in the greenhouse, or maybe he's teaching you a few things in the kitchen, or perhaps the two of you are simply lying in bed together with a book. Now and then you catch him watching you with a hint of a smile that shows more in his eyes than on his lips, and he'll frequently run a hand along your back or kiss your hair without a word, just to assure you that he's there and he adores you.

NSFW 18+ v

- Dedue is such a wonderfully sweet and gentle lover. He's not terribly experienced (before you, he'd assumed he would only ever marry if it were of political benefit to King Dimitri), but he generally knows what he's doing, and he's so attentive and focused that he'll easily pick up on all the wonderful little nuances of your pleasure. And you just know that he's generous in bed- a man so accustomed to happily serving others is absolutely going to bury himself between your thighs until you've cum all over his face, and make sure you're dazed with blissful pleasure before he even thinks about entering you.

- Regardless of your body type, it's likely you're still quite a bit smaller than he is overall, and he secretly loves that. It's hard to convince him that you want to focus on his satisfaction, as he's giving to a fault- but the moment he first sees you down between his knees, struggling to manage the size of his cock in your pretty little mouth, it wakes something in him that he'd never known before. He adores knowing that he's so much bigger than you, that he can hold and protect you, and he cherishes and admires everything soft about you.

- While he can't bring himself to engage in dirty talk or much vocalizing at all in bed, the way he gazes at you like you're the last beautiful thing on this earth makes his admiration entirely clear. He never wants to give you any reason to doubt his attraction to you, but rather than say it, he instead commits himself entirely to your comfort and satisfaction.

- His pace is generally slow but deep- something he feels somewhat obligated to focus on, given you'll need time to adjust to the impressive size of his cock. While not as much of an outward mother-hen like some of our guys, he's quietly vigilant about your reactions, and will immediately steady himself if it seems as though he's hurting you (no matter how absolutely adorable you look, faced flushed and with your body full of his thick member). Dedue is also definitely the type to tell you when he's close to cumming so you have the opportunity to tell him where you want it.

- It's not uncommon for things to get a little heated in the kitchen between you two. It's such a comforting but intimate activity that puts you both at ease- here, it's just you and him, working towards a low-stakes goal together and trading light conversation. But eventually, one or both of you simply can't resist how sweet and endearing the other is at times like this. Perhaps Dedue notices a drop of the sauce you just taste-tested clinging to your lip and leans close to kiss it away. Or perhaps you're daring enough to lick a stray bit of cream from the tip of his finger (which of course sets his heart pounding). Either way, if you're open to it, he'll gladly lift you against a wall or even onto an available counter and slowly push his length into you. Admittedly, it's hard to think of a better use of the time waiting for dough to rise than getting fucked nice and deep and steady by your strong, adoring lover.

[masterjedilenawrites]

What clone boys (+ the bad batch boys) looking for in their s/o? What is their ideal s/o?

Well, I kinda sorta went nuts with this question and got just a liiiitle carried away... oops...

Cody would be impressed by someone who could take charge of a messy situation or unruly group of people. He'd like someone who is independent and self-sufficient; he recognizes he may not always be there for them and wants to know they can take care of themselves. When he is around, he wants them to feel like a team, partners who are in sync, share the same goals, and make up for what the other lacks. He is attracted to good leadership skills, but turned off by cockiness.

Rex needs someone he can walk through life with side-by-side as equals, no exhausting power dynamics. He'd like someone who is dedicated to their beliefs and goals, but also someone who knows how to let loose and have a bit of (responsible) fun. He wants to know he can be himself around them, whether it's having an honest, soul-baring conversation or just acting really silly for no reason than because they can. He is attracted to good-humored attitudes, but turned off by shallow-ness. 

Wolffe would be into someone with style and sass, someone who isn't afraid to speak their mind or stand up for what's right. He'd like someone who is fearless and passionate, but also full of hope, who will meet his glass-half-empty attitude with unwavering and inspiring optimism. He may butt heads with his S/O from time to time, but they keep him honest and he does appreciate them for it, even if he looks unamused. He is attracted to wit, but turned off by self-centeredness.

Fox likes someone who is warm and friendly, someone who embodies the spirit of the word home. They would need to be dependable, loyal, and a real sweetheart. He is a true romantic at heart and would continue to "woo" his S/O even after they got together, so they would need to be appreciative of such gestures. After a tough day or mission, he'd rather go home to someone who can help him relax and maybe laugh a little. He is attracted to stability, but turned off by laziness.

Fives would fall for someone with a zest for life and a great sense of humor. They don't need to be chipper all the time; in fact, he appreciates someone who takes things seriously and who will fight for what is right, even when it's hard. But he also needs someone he can have fun with, who can find the joy in any situation, and maybe even get into a bit of innocent trouble from time to time. They would be his best friend. His other half. He is attracted to liveliness but turned off by ditziness. 

Jesse is drawn to the sweet, innocent types, someone who would get flustered by his flirting in the cutest of ways. He likes the feeling of being depended on and would take that duty very seriously. He's secretly a sensitive guy and would need someone he feels safe with, who would listen to his feelings without judgment and encourage him to be the best he can be. He really doesn't want to argue with his S/O. He is attracted to pretty smiles and turned off by stubbornness.

Kix admires someone who isn't afraid of honest, hard work, who will not hesitate to roll up their sleeves and do what is needed. But he'd also like someone with a flirty side, who could really surprise him and keep his days interesting. It's important to him that his S/O gets along with his brothers in the 501st, even allowing their free time to be spent with the battalion. He is a family-oriented guy and would need his partner to be, too. He is attracted to spontaneity, but turned off by recklessness.

Tup would like to be with someone who is more reserved, who can be a constant and steady presence in his life without being overwhelming or controlling. He is a bit withdrawn and struggles to feel understood sometimes, so he'd need someone who is patient with him, and comfortable with a less-intimate relationship. He'd be intrigued by someone creative or artistic, as well, and would be their biggest fan. He is attracted to gentleness and turned off by impulsiveness.

Hardcase would dig someone who can keep up with him, someone who is vibrant and always ready for an adventure. He wouldn't mind if they were chaotic or didn't have their life figured out; they could grow and learn together. When others try to hold him back, his S/O would encourage him to keep pushing; they'd be his cheerleader, and he'd be theirs. He finds it really sexy when someone puts themselves out there, both physically and emotionally. He is attracted to spunk and turned off by passiveness.

Dogma prefers someone who is rational and level-headed, maybe a little book-smart or nerdy. He wants to be able to have interesting and meaningful conversations with someone, about anything and everything. He likes someone who takes on quiet responsibilities, not needing to be seen in order to help. He also likes a level of tenderness; nothing too flirty or passionate, just simple and caring. He is attracted to humility and turned off by emotional reactions.

Echo has a soft spot for someone who is charismatic but compassionate, someone who uses their people-driven attitude to be hospitable and generous. He'd like to be with someone who's a little more outgoing than him, but not someone he'd have to keep up with. They would need to be polite and thoughtful, and always willing to communicate, even when it's awkward. He would want to share everything with them. He is attracted to candor but turned off by demanding attitudes.

Hunter wants someone who is easygoing and laid-back, who is uncomplicated and doesn't get caught up in drama or chaos. Someone who makes it clear what they think and what they want, rather than withdrawing or leaving him to make his own assumptions. They would be easy to be in a relationship with. But he does enjoy a good adventure, so it's important that they are active in that regard, too. He is attracted to wholesomeness and turned off by high-maintenance personalities.

Wrecker would be smitten with someone who meets his strength and brutality with softness and gentleness, who is a good balance for his rather intense way of living. They can't be timid in any way, though, because he'll challenge them to try new things. As long as they're a good sport, even if they're out of their element, he'll be very happy. They'd need to have a nice laugh, too, and he'd make it his personal mission every day to hear it. He is attracted to femininity and turned off by cowardliness.

Crosshair is interested in someone who lives their life honestly and sincerely, who is deeply kind but won't let themselves be walked over. Someone who accepts him for who he is but also challenges him when he's being too stubborn or unfair. They would be his rock in life, a person he will always seek out to have by his side. Their maturity puts him at ease and he never has to worry about them or doubt his worth in their eyes. He is attracted to confidence but turned off by popularity.

Tech would fancy someone who looks at the world with wide eyes, who asks questions and listens with their whole heart. They do not need to be super smart or an academic, but they do need to have curiosity and passion. He'd bond with someone over shared interests, but would be equally thrilled to learn something new from someone knowledgeable in other areas. Looks would hardly matter to him; it's their mind he'd fall in love with. He is attracted to talent and turned off by apathy.

[astaroth1357]

I love reading your how to guide they're fun to read and I was wondering if you do a how to be the brother's sugar mama 🤣

So I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty sure Lucifer would let you be his Sugar Mama over his actual dead body so... I did a Sugar Baby instead. If you really want me to write the Sugar Mama, message me and I wiiilllll but I think it’s more of a stretch then I was comfortable taking otherwise. But if we're doing this at all, we're going to have to do it NSFW people. It’s going to be sort of unavoidable either way, so strap in cause I sure did.

How to be a Demon's Sugar Baby

Make the Most of Your Bartered Soul!

Well, well, well this is quite the arrangement you've made with the forces of Hell now, isn't it?  There's nothing wrong with expecting a full return on your investment since you did give away your soul for this so it's time to enjoy that compensation! While we're sure that you're ready to be spoiled rotten by your beloved demon, there are going to be certain things expected of you in order to keep that affection flowing. In our guide, How to be a Demon's Sugar Baby, we will give you insight into what kind of actions you should expect to perform as well as the benefits you can receive when you start pampering your dearest demon! Always remember, love isn't material, but having good stuff is really nice regardless!

ATTENTION: This guide contains material not suitable for all workplaces. Reader's discretion advised.

Lucifer

What a wonderful selection for this kind of relationship because this demon is loaded! You need not worry about asking for too much. Whatever your heart's desire, Lucifer can provide.

HOWEVER… He's not a very generous demon. Every cent that he gives you, you will have to earn. The man isn't in the business of giving handouts, even to cuties like yourself.

Lucifer can be a demanding Sugar Daddy for sure. He will expect you to be ready for him at the drop of a hat. One text, one call, even a passing mention of your name, and you should be there. No questions asked or you will be punished.

It pays to be astute with Lucifer, too. If you're good, then he shouldn't even have to command you. One step in the room and you should know just what to do and how he's going to want it. Though remember, even if he doesn't say much, he's in control here.

There will be times where he's not looking for a little release and just needs some relaxation. You'll, of course, be expected to provide for that too: back rubs, tea, and pleasant conversation are all options you should get acquainted with very quickly.

Understand this now, anything short of perfection is not tolerated. If he's taking you anywhere, you're going to have to look/be amazing Every. Time. He'll make sure you'll have everything for it, but there's going to be no slacking off with him. Ever.

If you're looking to satisfy Lucifer, you won't just be a side piece or arm candy. You will be a trophy and he will spoil you like one.

Mammon

So maybe you don't like your Sugar Daddy with a lot of cash, but just the inability to say "no" to you in nearly any capacity…? Then Mammon's is your perfect pick!

True, it may not be wise to choose a Sugar Daddy who seems chronically without sugar to give but if there's any gambler in you then Mammon can be a near constant rush.

His highs are your highs, if he's out gambling then he'll want you on his arm or in his lap for good luck. Cheer him on and sprinkle in a bit of teasing because he's positive he makes better bets when he feels on top of the world.

If he makes a killing, then it's an all night celebration. He may even cover you in the Grimm just to enjoy how it looks. You won't stay like that very long though, because he'll need to have his way with you quite a few times before the sun comes up.

Don't fret, most of that money that he makes is going to go towards you anyway. You won't have to worry about him putting his bills over his Sugar (even if it's ill-advised).

Do remember that Mammon is a cheapskate at heart, but you shouldn't have any trouble bypassing that if there's something you want. Flash him some big, watery eyes and he'll cave every time until he goes broke again...

And then his lows are your lows… But if you still show him kindness and compassion even when he's flat broke, we guarantee he will never leave your side.

Leviathan 

Are you an otaku/gamer/geek who wants copious amounts of that sweet, sweet merch and a little love on the side? Then you also want Levi.

Just know that this demon is desperate for love in his life so you'll be busy on most days. Levi needs to be lavished in attention: cuddles, pets, kisses, and probably more sex than you can process. He's veeery pent up...

Thankfully, he stays in his room all the time so you can do whatever you like away from prying eyes! Which is good, because he tends to get adventurous when he's confident. There won't be a spot in his room you two have not been before.

Like Mammon, Levi's going to need a cheerleader as much as he does a lover. Nothing is quite like starting a competitive match with someone very vocally in your corner.

We do hope you like anime, video games, or general geekry because he won't tolerate indifference. You need not have memorized the entirety of the TSL Extended Compendium, but you should at least be able to identify his favorite characters or scenes in anything he watches. You won't last long otherwise.

If you can then consider the entirety of Akuzon's wares to be yours. You'll only need to ask. If there's any particular series that you enjoy, expect its merch to be gifted to you whenever he sees it. He'll have very little self-control (especially if it's all for you).

Truthfully, we have no idea where Levi gets his money so just don’t question how he keeps buying you so many things... It's probably some shady cryptocurrency or black market type stuff so we recommend you stay out of his finances, lest you learn something you regret...

Satan 

Ah, an intellectual are you? Not satisfied with just a fancy new car or a designer handbag? Do you need the very best that the world has to offer? The most beautiful, artistic, and thought-provoking goods you can find?? Then really your only choice is Satan.

… But do you like pets? We sincerely hope you like pets…

In truth, Satan will want two things from you: some stimulating conversation and a little pet play.

This is very much a "gentleman by day" arrangement. He'll be sure to treat you to very nice things all the time: wine tastings, art shows, even red carpet events thanks to his connections.

He won't mind taking you anywhere as long as you can engage that brain of his. Abstract conversations or discussions about hard topics will earn you even better trips the next time around...

But "by night" you will have a nickname, a collar, and probably a tail plug too. This man is bound and determined to have a cat and he does not care how.

If the idea of crawling for him makes you want to save face then don't worry. You needn't be an obedient kitty, not even for him.

In fact, he'd much prefer you act out from time to time because if there's one thing he likes more than cats, it's brats. Be cute for him and maybe he'll go easy on you if you like.

Asmodeus 

Do you like shopping? Just, the act of shopping in general? Do you want someone who won't just sign a check but shop with you? Asmo's the man.

He loves shopping and he loves shopping for you! He won't just stand outside the dressing room on his phone, he'll be a very active participant in making you happy.

A veeerrry active participant… Everywhere… Probably including that dressing room…

You need to understand now that Asmo is insatiable. Whatever you believe a high sex drive is, double it and then you will get Asmo on a Tuesday.

He's giving. Very giving in fact, in money and in bed, but that won't change that he is a monster. His stamina is unreal, his desire is unmatched, and assuming that you are not an incarnation of Aphrodite herself You. Will. Not. Keep. Up.

If you choose to be with Asmo it will be a hellish bliss. You will be pampered like royalty on a sea of euphoria until the tide overtakes you and you drown.

If this warning isn't enough to dissuade you, we wish you the best of luck. Asmo may bring you to the greatest highs of your life, but he very much can be the death of you too...

Beelzebub 

You know, food can be expensive. Especially if you have a bit of an appetite… If an endless food supply is what you're after, then you need Beel in your life!

He'll always be down to go out and try new foods or take you to whatever restaurant you like (provided he's eating there too, of course).

Considering the amount that he eats there's no way you can top his bill so order as much as you like! You'll get through what? Four? Five courses? He'll get cut off around 12.

Restaurants aside, food will be mostly what Beel expects from you so we do hope you like cooking. Cuddles and kisses are well and good but this demon needs to eat.

Speaking of which… Truthfully, being with Beel is almost just like a normal relationship but there's just one catch….

Beel is practically an oral addict. He will want to get a taste of you and once he does you ought to resign yourself to being his new fix. 

A session with Beel is not for the faint of heart. He can be down there for hours and won't stop even if you're a drooling, overstimulated wreck. His aftercare is sweet but it's a hell of a journey getting there. Be warned.

Belphegor

So maybe all these other options just sound like too much work... You want a Sugar Daddy, but someone who's on the laidback side, right? Introducing Belphegor.

Belphie is a man of simple pleasures. A quiet afternoon, a long nap, and maybe a game or some mischief in the middle of the night. You won't have to worry about doing very much because he won't be conscious very long...

He will, however, get his money's worth in the hours that he's awake.

Belphegor is a lazy soul, so don't expect him to put much work into things. His favorite tactic will be to get you so frustrated that you jump him. Then he can just sit back and enjoy the fun with a smug smile on his face…

If you're not riding him in some way then you're probably going to be his new pillow. He will find a way to sleep on you in every position possible until he finds a favorite and just sticks to that.

As far as what he offers, Belphie will pretty much just toss money in your direction and leave it up to you to spend it. He’s not a shopping man...

In the rare cases that he does go out and buy you a gift take it as a compliment. You’ve motivated him to leave the House for longer than twenty minutes so you must be exactly what he was after.

For more of my “How Tos...” check out my Masterlist!

[deaththesyd]

To The Brink Of Confession: Chapter 1, "He's not ugly"

I'd like to blame @mytanuki-kun for one of their works inspiring this side project that is now in the way of my Kisame week progress. As frustrating as this is, I'm having fun with this one and I'm excited to write my first true multi-chapter fic, even if it doesn't fit with the rest of my works and their timeline.

Summary: At first, she had shrugged it off as him simply being worn out from all the social interaction, but if that was the case, why was he only avoiding her?

At first, she had let it slide. Being super friendly and interacting with people was draining after all, and being forced to live in close quarters with such a loud group was sure to take its toll on even the most extroverted people. His avoidance lasted the entire rest of his time spent in her world, but she didn’t worry. As usual, a month passed by before she herself was teleported away into the foreign world of Jutsu, violence, and ninja. She even shook off her doubts when instead of her usual escorts, she was picked up by Kakuzu and Hidan, being told that the others were all preoccupied with important missions, ones that she would only be a distraction from. Entertaining as she found the duo and their antics, she couldn’t exactly hide her disappointment from the silver-haired loudmouth she had grown to consider a friend.

“What’s with all the moping, huh?” He said loudly, stood in front of her, face lowered to look her directly in the eyes as she had been watching the ground as she walked. Blocking her path forward, she stopped to look up at him, forcing herself to push down her thoughts and play them off as nothing. Surprising as it may be, Hidan wasn’t entirely self-absorbed and happened to be pretty talented at sensing other's emotions, a skill that he very rarely made use of. Not that it was really all that hard to see that something was up with her. Always easy to read, an open book, she was the worst liar and easily the most sincere person he had met. He seriously couldn’t stand her mood lately, it was worried and upsetting. Mixed with Kakuzu’s ongoing anger at everything and everyone, the irritating emotions were mixing and giving Hidan a headache. There were only two ways he could think of to fix this, either piss off Kakuzu to relieve his built-up stress and risk an explosive and painful response, or play concerned friend and get the woman lagging behind them to return to her normal upbeat self. Contemplating both options, the least painful option seemed the best bet.

“It’s not nothing, I can tell, so don’t bother lying, you’re shit at it anyway,” he cut her off as she tried to reply.

She tried anyway. “Really though,” she said, smiling almost convincingly, “I’m just lost in thought, we’ve been walking all day, can you blame me for tuning out?” Waving him off, she sidestepped him to follow after Kakuzu, who had not stopped for them and was quickly leaving them behind.

Knowing that the likelihood of being separated from Kakuzu was high if they didn’t keep up with the old man, he didn’t hold her back but stayed by her side to press for a proper response. “I said not to fucking lie,” he spoke casually knowing that anything truly harsh would only shut her up further, “you’ve been like this ever since you got here, it’s not just you being tired of walking.”

Sighing, she replied, “Ok, you’re right that I’m not just tired, but it’s nothing, really. I just need to manage it by myself.” No longer lying was a step forward, but she kept her lips tight on whatever it was. She was stubborn, but Hidan was persistent.

“What’s with you being all shy all of a sudden? You’re always so fucking talkative no one but Fishface can get you to be quiet,” he complained, almost missing how she reacted at the mention of the tall swordsmen. He grinned, seemed like he had a hook. “Awe, is this about your little crush on the big guy? Did you ask him out and he chickened out?” He laughed cruelly.

It wasn’t much of a secret that she had feelings for Kisame, she wasn’t very good at hiding how he caught her eye, often spacing out while watching him train, and making any excuse to get his attention. Everyone at some point had noticed the flush to her face around him, or the fond look in her eyes as she looked up at him. To most, it wasn’t anything to focus on. Kakuzu and Sasori couldn’t care less about it, as long as she wasn’t being obnoxious, Itachi seemed to keep a careful watch over her and her interactions with his partner, his reasons were unknown to Hidan who couldn’t care less about the Uchiha. Deidara and Hidan made sure to poke fun and tease her at any opportunity, making sure to keep their taunts from the man of her affections, trying to draw out their entertainment as long as they could. After months of this, she had become accustomed to the mostly friendly jeering from the two and had begun to poke fun at herself as well. It seemed she had resigned herself to watching from afar and keeping her flirting to a level that was easily mistaken for friendly conversation by the oblivious man.

Years of being acquainted with Kisame had only given Hidan a surface-level knowledge of the man, but recently he had noticed just how unconfident truly was of his looks, something he of course zeroed in on immediately. 6 foot whatever and hulking over even Kakuzu, it was hilarious to him that the member of the legendary Swordsmen of the Mist was both self-conscious over his fishy appearance, and his years of training as a ninja had not taught him to notice the obvious signs that a woman was into him. How anyone could be so unaware, yet so skilled was beyond him.

Her face saddened at his words, her brow furrowing, and her eyes cast themselves to the ground again. “I haven’t said anything, but I think he might have caught on,” she said quietly.

Despite her clearly upset confession, he grinned. “Way to go! Fishface finally figured out how to see above water, wondered if his brain was just waterlogged,” he snickered, excited that he could finally openly pick on him over the subject, but she didn’t smile and remind him to be nice like she normally did when he made digs at the sharkman. Clearly not a good sign then.

“I think he’s avoiding me,” she said, looking defeatedly at her shuffling feet. Now that made no sense.

Not long after it was clear to everyone but Kisame that she had an attraction to the tall man, it became more and more obvious that it was reciprocated. As much as she stared at him, he stared at her. Less openly, probably why it had taken everyone a while longer to see it, but it was well known that the two were complete idiots that had no clue the other was just as interested as they were. Part of Hidan had wanted to tell them immediately, embarrass them and make a scene out of it all, but another part of him had held onto their frustrations and fed off of it as a much more drawn-out entertainment source. Deidara was in on it too, saying that as much as he wanted to set off an explosive show by forcing their feelings out into the open, he also wanted there to be a build-up. In the meantime, they got to tease their fishy accomplice as much as they could get away with without pissing him off and alerting the other half of the pining duo. The fact that Kisame was avoiding her after finding out she felt the same was not what anyone had expected. For once in his life, Hidan was pissed at the drama of it. He would not admit that he was actually looking forward to the two becoming a couple.

“Bet he’s just scared that someone thinks his ugly mug is hot and is worried for your sanity,” he laughed. Her hand smacked him halfheartedly.

“He’s not ugly.” She said sternly, “Although with how forward I’ve been, he may have been creeped out,” she smiled, but there was a twinge of pain on her face that Hidan couldn’t help but notice. It pissed him off, his whole religion was about inflicting pain and death for his God, but seeing her genuinely upset gave him a feeling of frustration on her behalf.

“There’s no way he’s creeped out by your creepy staring,” he found himself attempting to reassure her, feeling as though he was betraying his and Deidara’s whole scheme. “He’s clearly just as much a creepy stalker as you are.”

Unsure that she had heard him correctly, she looked up to see Hidan avoiding eye contact, looking off the side of the road, ignoring her reaction purposely. “I don’t see how he’s the stalker,” she laughed humorlessly, “When he’s the one avoiding me.”

“Of course you don’t, you’re just as fucking blind as he is,” he muttered. Her sudden giggle made him look at her in suspicion. “The hell’s so funny?”

She brought a hand to try and stifle her laughter before she spoke, “What’s got you all grumpy now? Upset someones not crushing back on you?” She teased, eyes darting to look at the silent man trudging forward ahead of them, then back at Hidan.

The glare he shot her only made her giggles slightly louder. “What the fuck are you gettin’ at?” He spat, daring her to continue.

Humming whimsically, she spoke, “I just think that maybe you’re projecting some of your own frustrations onto someone else.”

He should have chosen to piss off Kakuzu. She may have been the lesser of two evils at a first glance, but the ability she had to force him into subjects he would rather avoid was something he had forgotten to account for in his earlier decision. Unlike the completely requited yet oblivious relationship between her and Kisame, Hidan’s own feelings were something he tried to ignore whenever possible. It was just a shitty joke she had made, something about how Hidan should leave her alone since he was really just trying to make the old man jealous. Something he should have shaken off with a normal insult towards the old miser, yet he had frozen, caught off guard by the accuracy. That was the one and only time he had ever allowed himself to come out to someone and let them live. It was shameful in the church to have feelings of devotion for anyone but Jashin, yet wanting someone that couldn’t produce more followers was even more so. Adamantly, he refused his feelings towards the man, but since that day she had treated his explicit flirting as nothing more than a show.

Embarrassed as he was, his comeback held no bite, and her teasing and further avoidance of the earlier topic increased. Eventually, it turned into a loud argument that reached Kakuzu’s ears, who ended their annoying discussion by threatening them both. She was easier to scare, but whatever they had been squabbling about had made Hidan more feisty than normal.

“Fuck off you old dick! There’s plenty of politer ways to ask to be included in a conversation,” came the danger prodding taunt from the young man. It was hard to guess why, but the older man’s fuse was shorter than usual, and the woman yelped as a dark arm split off from the man's torso to grab the face of the loudmouthed man right beside her. Flailing wildly and ineffectively he was dragged along the ground, yanked by the harsh grip of the intolerant man. Green eyes surrounded by red sclera flashed at her, warning her she would be next if she didn’t follow quietly. Swallowing a lump in her throat, she did just that.

[remcycl333]

Hello!! responding late bc of school 😻 Anyhow when it comes to more manifestations, I'm manifesting:

1) My mother and I to move out of our current living situation because it's not the best. I've never had a washer and dryer in my living space, I want to experience getting up and washing my clothes whenever I please instead of collecting change to wash clothes at the laundromat!! I want my dream room and I want my mom to feel comfortable and relaxed since she's worked so hard.

2) To attend a better school. I need to attend a high school that has technology in mind, the school I'm at currently is more preforming arts then technology. Plus, it doesn't have the benefits I'm looking at in school. I'm planning to take AP courses throughout my years in high school, my goal is a total of 8 or 9 AP classes. I know it's a lot, but go big or go home.

3) My mom accepting me as trans and gay and becoming lenient. My mom is not accepting of the LBGTQ+ community AT ALL. She is very strict and she doesn't allow none of it. I came out her November 2020 and she tried to sign me up for conversion therapy at her church so that speaks for itself. I try to make jokes out of it but the truth is, it's not funny. I want to comfortable in my own skin inside my home as well. On top of that I DONT have a phone because she is so strict so the library and my laptop is my best friend. And it's just like my laptop is on the brink of death, it crashes when I run YouTube. And the library is like 5 miles away and I'm tired of walking that whole way just to leave in 2 hours. I just want a phone so bad, they're so pretty and nice to customize and CONVIENENT 😩

4) My appearance. I know I'm stunning. But my face is slightly symmetrical and I'm tired of cameras portraying me lime I'm someone else- 😭 And my haiirrrrrrr, it's very coily and very dry and brittle. I just can't manage it. I need to stop lying to myself like "oh I love my hair!! 😽😍" like no you don't, you know damn well you want curly hair. I sure do!! I just felt bad because I felt like I wasn't embracing myself and loving myself "as I truly am" but like this hair isn't me.

OH, I have a question: when is manifesting too much? Like if I manifest too many things does that make me greedy or a master at manifesting 🤔 The reason I'm asking this is because I've been feeling a bit guilty because I manifest good and I feel like I'm not working towards my goal, in like a "traditional" way?

Anyways, that is all!!! Have a nice day/night 💗

im very excited to hear ur future success stories, these desires sound great!! and there is never "too much" with manifesting. as we manifest all day every day anyway, it makes sense that we would rather manifest favorable things then to continue manifesting a reality that we are unhappy with. also don't worry about "life being too easy" or you not getting things in a "traditional" way! society has conditioned us to believe that we have to work hard to get what we want or that some people are more deserving of things than others, but this is simply not true. everyone deserves money and to be happy and to feel confident and loved and accepted. and as we were all born with the power to manifest, that actually is the traditional way, not this capitalism bullshit that humans created. i also sincerely believe that everyone who finds out about the law of assumption found out about it for a reason and that we are meant to harness it. so don't feel guilty! as long as you're not manifesting harm to yourself or others you are perfectly fine :)

[qwertyfingers]

fic prompt: cas and jack talk about stimming

this got kinda long and is really more Dean and Jack talking, but it felt right, so! I hope you enjoy :)

“Do you ever get this feeling like there’s ants in your veins?” 

 Dean looks up at the sound of Jack’s muffled voice. He’s got an orange pen cap in his mouth, chewed all to hell, but the marker body’s nowhere in sight. He’s concentrating hard. That crease between his brows is all Cas. 

Dean’s been attempting to work for an hour now, but mostly he’s been watching Cas out of the corner of his eye. Cas was concocting his latest craft project for him and Jack; some scrapbooking thing he’d read about on a homeschooling website. Dean was nervous about the presence of so much glue at his map table, but Cas had at least been nice enough to forgo the glitter this time. 

“What do you mean?” Cas asks, and his face morphs into a perfect mirror of Jack’s frown; like father like son like father.

“You know, how sometimes you’re sitting still and you suddenly get itchy all over and feel like you need to run really fast or jump out of an airplane or something,” he says, matter-of-fact. Dean snorts. 

“I can’t say I do know what you mean,” Cas says, frown deepening some. “Why don’t you tell us more about it.” He turns his frown toward Dean and makes a questioning gesture. Dean just shrugs. 

“I don’t know if I can explain it better,” Jack answers, looking up from his book for the first time. “Sometimes I just feel sort of… agitated, and I have to do something physical or I can’t calm down. I was wondering if there was a word for that.” 

Cas tilts his head quizzically. He’s squinting in that way he always has — face turned toward Jack’s, but eyes focused in a way that makes it look like he’s trying to examine all the particles of air between them. 

“‘s called “stimming”, apparently,” Dean interjects, taking pity on Cas. 

“Oh. I don’t think I’ve never heard that word before,” Cas replies, glancing over at him again, “what does it mean?” 

Dean shifts in his seat awkwardly, legs bouncing up and down jerkily. “I don’t know the exact definition but the word comes from, um, ‘stimulating’ I think? It’s used for stuff that makes you feel good or calms you down when you do it, like uh, movement or whatever.” 

“I didn’t know you knew much about this .” Cas says, and there’s a ghost of a smile pulling at his mouth, fond. 

Jack looks up, interested, and in distraction starts colouring the back of his own hand. 

“Yeah, well, I’ve lived it for long enough,” Dean flushes lightly as he speaks, and his voice comes out in a rushed mumble, “also Sam kinda forced me to read a book about it last year. ‘cause he’s a doof.” 

He’d been annoyed about it at the time, but, well Sam hadn’t exactly been wrong —  he had learned a lot. But mostly it had been like putting names to old faces. Learning the scientific reason for why Sam hates the texture of acrylic sweaters enough that he’d tried to set fire them in his teens doesn’t really help Dean, and Dean had never needed a reason to justify Sam’s decision not to wear ‘em. 

 He still made fun of him for it, mind. The image of Sam hunched over behind an empty planter outside a shitty motel trying to start a fire with a broken bic lighter and two sticks was one that Dean would retain and until the end of his days. He might tell it as part of Sam’s best man speech, now that he thinks of it. 

“So is it – is it stimming when I want to spin around in circles for a long time?” Jack’s stopped colouring, capping his marker, and his now unoccupied hands are twisting about in the air at high speed. “Or when I go and run through the field?” 

Dean nods in response.

“And when you hold your arm out of the car to feel the wind? Is that the same thing?” 

“Pretty much, Jacko,” Dean says, and leans over to ruffle Jack’s hair. “This is too,” he says, pointing to Jack’s rambling hands. 

“Huh. That’s cool,” Jack says. He sounds sincere, but then he’s eyes go distant and he squints at the table. “I’m going to go and play minecraft now, thank you Dad. And Dean. And Dad.” He says, waving, then takes off at speed. He stops in the doorway to throw out “I want pasta for dinner, if that’s okay!” and then he’s gone.

Dean laughs and takes a swig of his drink as he focuses back in on the work he was pretending to do earlier. “Good kid,” he mumbles to himself. Dean always found conversations like this more than a little stressful, but he’d managed to get through this one without screwing anything up, at least.

After a moment, he senses eyes on himself, and turns to see Cas still offering him that fond look of his.

“Thank you, for that.” Cas reaches out a hand and places it on Dean’s bouncing thigh, and it goes still. 

“Ah, it ain’t no thing, Cas.”

“I think we both know that’s not true,” he says, and raises a defiant eyebrow at Dean. Dean just shrugs and starts his reading back up.

His leg doesn’t start twitching again until Cas takes his hand away..

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Swedish Hologram Crush

Pairing: Reggie x Alive!Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: none?

A/N: Happy last day of JATP Appreciation Week! Thank you to @jatp-week for organizing this, it’s been so much fun!! Today’s prompt was to write something in canonverse so I bring you my first ever Reggie fic featuring a Julie’s Classmate!Reader. Let me know if you‘d like to be tagged in any of my future jatp works because even though this week is over I will still be writing for these wonderful characters! As always, lmk what you think!!

Masterlist

___

You hadn’t meant to fall in love with a hologram boy from Sweden, you really hadn’t. It had just sort of happened.

Who could blame you though? You were pretty sure everyone in the gym fell at least a little bit in love with the band when they appeared as if by magic behind Julie that day. You, however, fell completely for the bassist.

You were first struck by his looks. Sure, the brunet and blond boys were cute but there was something about the bassist. His dark, styled hair and leather jacket over the red flannel. Your first thought was that he was hot, and then he smiled and your heart melted.

You could tell just by the way he performed and interacted with the crowd and his bandmates that he wore his emotions on his face and his heart on his sleeve. Then he sent a wink in your direction as he played.

You were hooked from then on.

You had so many questions for Julie when you got to your shared bio class. You’d somehow managed to be lab partners for two years in a row now and you worked quite well together so you didn’t feel like you were taking advantage of your situation to get information about the boy.

She told you his name was Reggie and that they were actually from Sweden. You’d been disappointed but unfortunately the fact that you’d probably never be able to meet each other let alone communicate didn’t stop your crush from developing.

You continued to inquire about him when you met at her house to study for tests or work on homework. She’d always tell you what you wanted to know but would always remind you, nicely, that you didn’t have a chance.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt, Y/N,” she’d say sincerely but you would wave her off.

“It’s just a harmless celebrity crush.”

“We’re not celebrities!” Julie would protest  and you’d grin.

“Not yet, you aren’t,” you would remind her, confident in the fact that her band was going places. “But when you go big and the whole world falls in love with those cute Swedish boys I’ll be able to say I was the first Reggie girl.”

You’d both laugh at that before returning to whatever school work you were working on.

You went to every performance you could as well, unable to get enough of the cute bassist and loving the band’s sound. You’d made it to their last-minute coffee shop gig and Julie’s garage party. The girl had even managed to score you a ticket to their Orpheum performance, knowing how big of a fan you were.

___

While Luke was going out of his mind trying to navigate his feelings and relationships it Julie, Reggie had an even bigger problem. He hadn’t been able to get you out of his mind since he’d first seen you in Julie’s school’s gymnasium. He asked Julie about you all the time and would often sit next to you on the couch when you came over to study. He knew you couldn’t see or hear him but he liked spending time with you, much like he did with Ray. Sometimes he’d help you when you got stuck on a problem since bio was one of his favorite subjects in school. You couldn’t hear him but Julie could and it always made him feel warm to know he helped you out.

His situation with you was worsened by the fact that he knew you had a crush on him as well. He heard you ask Julie about him (most of the time he would feed her the answers to your questions so you could know more about him) and he also heard you gush about how cute and talented you thought he was and how unfair it was that he lived in Sweden. He knew in the back of his head that telling you they were from Sweden was actually a smart idea, but he resented his friend for the choice as it meant you’d never know that he was there with you and interested in you too.

Luke had it easy, he often thought frustratedly. At least Julie and Luke could see each other and communicate. Reggie had to get by on the eye contact and smiles she gave him during their gigs. The hardest one had been the Orpheum when he had been sure that it was the last time they’d ever see each other again. It broke his heart when he disappeared after their bows, sending you one last smile and a wink like at their first performance.

When Julie saved them in the barn he couldn’t help but feel relieved. Sure things would still be difficult, but the two of you would be able to make eye contact and share smiles again. He just didn’t realize how soon or often.

___

The day after the Orpheum performance you made your way to the Molina’s garage, having arranged to meet up with Julie to study for your upcoming exam. You let yourself in, sending a text to Julie to let her know you were there. You jumped slightly when you looked up from your phone and noticed she wasn’t alone. Standing in the studio fiddling with a bass was Reggie himself.

“Oh my gosh, um, hi,” you said, shocked at the sight of the boy in front of you. “Oh, um, I’m sorry. Do you speak English?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I speak English?” He asked, tilting his head slightly in confusion.

“Oh, well, Julie said you guys were from Sweden so....”

“Ohh, right! Yeah, that’s us, the Swedish hologram band,” he chuckled nervously and you narrowed your eyes suspiciously.

“Wow, you don’t have an accent at all,” you scrutinized and he chewed his lip nervously.  

“Y/N! You’re here! Ready to work on that lab?” Julie called as she stepped into the studio, heading straight to the couch where they usually worked and setting up her materials.

“Uh, yeah,” you said, puzzled by her actions. She didn’t even stop to look at Reggie. “You didn’t tell me your bandmates were coming in from Sweden.”

“What?” She asked, looking up from her materials. When she locked eyes with Reggie her eyes widened. “You can see him?”

“Yes, I can see your bandmate who speaks perfect English and has no accent whatsoever,” you said, raising your brow to indicate your suspicions. “The jig is up, Molina. Spill.”

“Okay,” Julie sighed, “You’d better sit down though.”

The three of them made their way to the couch, sitting in the same arrangement (unbeknownst to you) that you’d been sitting in for weeks now with you sandwiched between the two musicians. From this close up you could see the freckles that dotted Reggie’s cheeks and nose and the different flecks of colors in his blue eyes. Your breath caught in your throat as he smiled lightly at you, your eyes locking.

“Okay, lovebirds, you’ll have time to stare dreamily into each other’s eyes later,” Julie said, and you felt heat immediately rise to your cheeks as you looked down at your lap. “So, this is gonna sound crazy but you have to go with me on this, okay?”

You nodded, turning to look at your friend curiously.

“They’re ghosts,” she said and your eyes widened at the explanation, looking back and forth between Julie and Reggie. “They died twenty-five years ago and somehow I brought them back.”

“This is insane,” you said, trying to keep an open mind but not believing it.

“It’s true,” Reggie said somewhat solemnly and you turned to stare at him in confusion. “Oh, Julie! Show her the article about our deaths!”

Julie nodded, pulling out her phone and pulling up a webpage before handing it to you. The headline read Sunset Curve: A Hollywood Tragedy. The article detailed the tragic death of three-fourths of the band Sunset Curve right before their performance at the Orpheum in 1995. As you scrolled down you found a picture of three boys who were unmistakably Luke, Reggie, and Alex.

“You’re ghosts.” You said quietly, handing Julie her phone back. “If you’re dead how come I can see you?”

“Well, I don’t really know,” Reggie admitted. “Only Julie was able to see us before but some weird stuff happened last night so maybe it has to do with that?”

“Weird stuff?”

“We were able to touch,” Julie explained. “Before then we just passed through each other.”

“Yeah! Our souls were going to be destroyed but then Julie saved us with a magic hug!” Reggie added and your eyebrows shot up.

“Okay you’re gonna have to back up and explain all that,” you laughed and Reggie grinned, immediately launching into a detailed and dramatic retelling of the events of the last few weeks. How they’d come back as ghosts, found out they could still perform with Julie and that their old bandmate had betrayed them. You gasped at all the right places when he told you about meeting Caleb and the curse he put on them. When he explained the significance of their Orpheum performance and how upset he’d been when he thought you wouldn’t see each other again.

You couldn’t quite believe it but, well, a literal ghost was telling it to you so you supposed it came with the territory. You weren’t sure when, but at some point in your conversation Julie had excused herself, leaving you and Reggie to talk alone.

“So, you were sad you wouldn’t see me again?” You asked curiously, trying to fight the heat rising to your cheeks at the implication.

“Devastated!” Reggie exclaimed, before quieting down as he realized the connotations. His cheeks turned red and he had to fight to look you in the eyes as he continued. “I’ve had a crush on you since we performed Bright at your assembly.”

Your eyes widened at the confession and you beamed.

“Really? I’ve had a crush on you for just as long,” you admitted shyly.

“Oh, I know!” Reggie beamed, and you stared at him. “I, uh, may have heard you talking to Julie about me on multiple occasions.”

“That’s so embarrassing,” you groaned, putting your face in your hands to hide from the boy.

“Hey, I thought it was adorable and really sweet,” Reggie reassured you, reaching out to gently pull your hands away from your face.

“Reg, you’re touching me,” you gasped as you looked down at your hands with were still held in his.

You gasped softly again when you looked back up and found his eyes studying you thoughtfully. There was something in his eyes that you could only describe as intense as you stared at one another, faces subconsciously moving closer together until their noses were nearly touching.

“Does that mean I can kiss you?” Reggie asked softly, squeezing your hands lightly and eyes flicking to your lips before returning to your own.

“I’d like to find out,” you whispered back.

As soon as the words were fully out of your mouth Reggie surged forward, connecting your lips. The kiss was soft and sweet, one of your hands slipping from his to reach up and cup his cheek. It was over all too soon but it was worth it to see the smile that broke out across his face. His hand came up to cover yours that was still resting on his cheek, his thumb softly stroking the back of your hand.

“That was nice,” you breathed and he nodded in agreement.

“Wanna do it again?” He asked brightly and you laughed, reconnecting your lips.

“Woah! Hey!” Julie exclaimed as she walked back into the garage. “I left so you’d have privacy to get to know each other, not get to know each other’s mouths!”

The two of you jumped apart, your face heating up in embarrassment once again. You chanced a glance at Reggie and found his face red with embarrassment but the ghost boy was grinning cheekily at Julie. She rolled her eyes at the boy before shooing him away.

“We have an exam to study for!” She reasoned as she pulled him from the couch, attempting to push him through the garage door.

She’d nearly managed it when Reggie poofed from her grasp and back to his place on the couch, leaning over to give you a quick peck on your cheek. He called out a goodbye as he ran from the garage, not wanting to face the wrath of Julie and you laughed, waving at him until Julie closed the door, blocking him from your view.

___

JATP Taglist: @meangirlsx

[kindahoping4forever]

Under The Christmas Lights // Ashton Irwin

Cass and I are having a blast so we hope everyone has been enjoying Hoe For The Hoe-lidays as much as we are. Her Cal blurb for the day, Baby Please Come Home, is up at @cal-puddies​ and it is one of my favorites from her, so you should definitely check it out if you haven’t already. (And as always, links to all of this week’s blurbs are in the event masterlist below!) Stay tuned tomorrow for our last set of blurbs and our grand finale on Monday: a galaxybrain co-write I guarantee you do not want to miss.

Extra thanks to Cass for helping me figure out what this story wanted to be. The overall concept remained but the structure, character details and tone of it took on a life of its own and morphed drastically as I was writing it. 

Warnings: Established slow burn with Neighbor!Ash, mentions of quarantine, a healthy helping of thirst and sexual tension, implied consensual voyeurism and exhibitionism, mutual masturbation

Word Count: 4048

Hoe For The Hoe-lidays Masterlist

Masterlist // Taglist and Ko-Fi linked above

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

"Quite the festive display you have there."

He stops at the end of his driveway, popping an earbud out as he turns towards your voice. Your next door neighbor, Ashton, stands in his yard, looking at you expectantly as you sit on your front porch, gesturing towards the freshly hung Christmas decorations all along his house.

"Oh thanks! I'm actually not even done. Waiting on a few more pieces to be delivered, really trying to merry things up, you know?" He answers, turning to collect today’s mail.

"Oh really? Everything's already so bright and eye-catching… up so early too," you punctuate your evaluation with a sip of coffee.

He smiles at you and you’re almost embarrassed to say you feel your heart skip a beat. You admit you had a bit of a crush on him when you moved in last year and for a while it seemed plausible you could’ve ended up more than just friendly neighbors. But that hope was yet another thing 2020 took from you.

Even though you were home more because of quarantine, you understandably had to interact with him less and less; gone were the days of “accidentally” baking too many cookies and walking over to offer him a plate or hoping your mail gets misdelivered so he’ll have an excuse to come visit you. These days, your visits were relegated to socially distanced greetings over the backyard fence and happenstance meetings like this.

“Yeah… I know it’s early in the season but I thought after the year we’ve all had, a little extra Christmas cheer couldn’t hurt,” he shrugs. He looks like he’s about to elaborate but then he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket; he apologetically but sincerely says, “Have a good night” and then scurries back to his house before you can get another word in.

It’s another couple of weeks before your next encounter, one night when you’re bringing the garbage can back up the drive and you hear Ash’s voice greeting you from his side of the fence.

“Those decorations certainly escalated, didn’t they?” You ask, amusedly peering up at his colorful house; the flickering icicle lights on the trim were a new addition, along with a big glowing snowflake and star sitting on his balcony.

“Does that mean you like it?” He laughs delightedly, walking up his own driveway. Your brain involuntarily appreciates how he looks with the lights reflecting off the dark wool trench coat he’s wearing; his hair is a lot longer than the last time you saw him, beard much darker and fuller. He looks good. You try not to think about it.

“Very pretty… not anything I would put up, but it suits you,” you comment, hoping your tone landed on the right side of the line between flirty and rude; you’re so out of practice at this, you’re not quite sure.

He takes it in stride. “That’s fair,” he chuckles. “No decorations for you this year?”

“Oh, I’ve got a wreath on my door,” you gesture. “May or may not get a tree. Little touches like that, things just for me; that feels appropriate but full on decorating this year… it just doesn’t feel right, doesn’t feel true to what we’re all experiencing.”

He furrows his brow. “Do you think my decorations are dishonest?” He asks, looking interested in your perspective.

“Not yours specifically, lots of people in the neighborhood are doing the same thing, some started even earlier than you did,” you carefully try to explain. “It just feels like surrounding ourselves with these crazy festive decorations… it’s like we’re working very hard to convince each other, maybe even ourselves, that this year isn’t any different when that couldn’t be farther from the truth… it is different and it feels weird not to acknowledge that.”

You look up, hoping you haven’t offended him, that you don’t see like too much of a grinch; you find yourself surprised at how relieved you feel when he nods thoughtfully as he considers your point of view.

“I actually agree, people are definitely using the decorations as a bit of a coping mechanism,” Ashton states, leaning on the fence as he ponders. “But I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I know for me, after spending so much time being upset that I was trapped in my house this year, I figured I should do what I can to make my house feel happy for once. Especially if I’m gonna spend Christmas alone in it.”

You marvel at how despite the heavy turn the conversation has taken, his face never darkens, his warm and cheerful aura never falters. “Oh. I actually hadn’t thought of it like that,” you admit, playing with the drawstring of your hoodie, wondering why you care that you’re feeling vulnerable around him. “I’ll be alone this year too. I guess it just doesn’t feel like Christmas to me so I don’t like reminding myself that it is that time of year. If that makes sense.’

He gives you a sad but empathetic look. “I totally get it. I felt like that for most of the year… birthdays, seasons changing… I didn’t want to admit any of it was happening,” he shares. “But I don’t know… not to seem like I have it all figured out, but if we can’t change how we react to the environment we’re in, I think there’s something to be said for changing the environment itself. It’s important to acknowledge what you feel but also letting in even a little positivity can do wonders.”

You offer him a soft smile, letting him know you appreciate his encouragement. “Even just seeing the wreath on my door every morning is a nice moment,” you confess.

Ash smiles back and you feel warmer than if you’d gone inside and cozied up in front of your fireplace. “See? A couple strings of lights, a little tree. Maybe break out with that big yellow Minion you put out on your lawn when you moved in last Christmas,” he teases, lightening the mood.

“OK, first of all, it’s not a Minion, it’s Woodstock from the Peanuts, thank you,” you laugh, shaking your head. “I’m surprised you remember that.”

“Well, it was quite the first impression,” he shrugs and you can’t help but notice how broad his shoulders look in that coat.

You lay in bed that night, the night’s events on a loop in your mind; you ended up standing outside and chatting over the fence for more than an hour. It was nice and stirred a sense of normalcy in you that you hadn’t felt in a long time. It stirred other feelings in you as well but you knew there wasn’t any sense in dwelling on that since it’d be a long time before either of you would be able to do anything about that.

A few days later, you hear a muffled murmur that sounds a lot like your name while you’re washing dishes; you look out the kitchen window to see Ashton waving at you from his patio. He’s shirtless and sweaty, having clearly just finished his afternoon yoga session. Not that you had taken to timing your kitchen chores to coincide with his workouts.

You signal to him to give you a minute and then you head out the backdoor to chat. “What’s up?” You say as casually as possible, willing yourself to keep your eyes trained on his face and not the sweat dripping over his defined muscles or how low his athletic shorts are hanging.

“Your house is looking nice,” he gestures at the colored lights you recently hung around your window frames. “Little touches, just for you, like you said. I like it.”

You beam at him, impressed that he remembered your words from the other night. “You were right, I do feel a bit brighter having put those up,” you share, stuffing your hands in your hoodie pocket to keep from fidgeting, thinking about how much you’d like to brush the curls out of his eyes.

“I’m glad to hear it,” he replies jovially. “I actually have something for you.” He gestures for you to back up as he ducks inside his backdoor, retrieving the package off his kitchen table; he walks back out and smiles when he sees you’ve also turned around so he can surprise you. He sets the box over the fence and returns to his patio; he waits a beat longer than necessary to give you the all clear, he had to give himself a second to appreciate your ass in those leggings.

You spin around and see a box containing an inflatable light up Minion wearing a Santa hat. “Are you kidding me?!” You burst out laughing, picking up the gift to inspect.

“Figured Woodstock could use a buddy,” he laughs, shrugging. “Ordered it when I came inside after our talk the other night, just in case you changed your mind about decorating.”

You feel yourself blush. “Wish I could offer you more than a smile and a thank you,” you blurt, before realizing how forward that sounded. “I mean, like a hug or dinner or something…” You laugh nervously and look to see him trying and failing to hold back a devilish smirk.

“Well. When the time is right, I’d love to take you up on that offer… for the hug or the something,” he flirts.

The next day, you make Christmas cookies and leave some in his mailbox when he goes for his morning run. When he comes to tape a thank you note to your front door, he catches a glimpse of you through the window, decorating the tabletop Christmas tree you bought for yourself and you share a nice moment.

You gave him your phone number that time pre-lockdown when he went out of town and you watered his lemon tree; he finally starts using it, texting you on and off throughout the day and it’s nice to feel like you finally have someone to share with.

It’s when you’re in bed at night, texting away, that you always wish you could share even more with him. Your phone says he’s typing a response and you turn over to stare across the room at your bedroom window, the one facing his bedroom window. His curtains are drawn but you can see the soft glow of a bedside table lamp illuminating the room; you wonder what color the lamp is. Wonder if he sleeps on the left or right side of his bed. Wonder what he’s wearing while he’s typing his messages to you. If he’s wearing anything at all. Wonder if he wants to ask you the same thing. You lay there, wondering, until your phone buzzes again and the cycle continues.

You carry on like this for the next couple of weeks, collecting feelings and building tension. A few days before Christmas, you hurry outside to collect the packages that were just delivered by the mailbox, rushing to bring them in before the holiday Zoom party you have planned with friends.

You stop to text your pals you’ll be a few minutes late when you hear a sharp gasp behind you. You turn and see Ashton at the end of his driveway, eyes poring over you in the fitted green velvet wrap dress you’re wearing.

“You sure cleaned up for the mail delivery?” He jokes, trying to recover how clearly affected he is by the sight in front of him. You realize it’s the first time in months he’s seen you in anything besides hoodies and lounge pants.

You laugh, walking to the fence. “I have a Zoom party to attend but I didn’t want these boxes sitting out here all night,” you explain, instinctively starting to touch your face out of nervousness before stopping yourself for the sake of the dark red lipstick you have on; you’re not used to wearing makeup these days.

“Well… you look fuckin’ incredible,” he breathes, making no attempt to disguise the way his gaze is travelling up and down your body. He runs his hand through his hair and clears his throat, willing himself to move on. “I won’t keep you, then. I just wanted to ask you something.”

You lock eyes with him and feel your heart speed up; usually you’d have a quippy reply to shoot back to him but today, all you can think of is the heat you feel between the two of you. Instead, you nod attentively, trying your best to act like your mind isn’t distracting you with daydreams of walking around to his side of the fence and leaping into his arms.

“I know we’re both alone for the holidays… wish I’d thought of this sooner, so we could’ve done something about Christmas, actually… but say if we were to properly quarantine - you know, like, no outside contact at all quarantine - would you want to spend New Year’s together?” He’s speaking quickly, rushing it out as if he’s afraid he’ll lose his nerve and yet he presents his proposal with an assurance that almost hypnotizes you.

You can’t keep from grinning ear to ear but you still try to play it cool. “That could be fun,” you answer, grateful. You joke, “God, I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at a party for New Year’s, what do people even do to celebrate at home?”

Without missing a beat, he suggestively replies, “I’m sure we can think of something.”

You have fun with your friends on Zoom but in the back of your mind you can’t stop thinking about the way that Ash looked at you, the honest hunger in his eyes. You keep your curtains open much later than usual, hoping to catch a glimpse of him, wondering if the lights around the window will catch his eye and he’ll stop to try and catch a glimpse of you.

New Year’s can’t get here fast enough as far as you’re concerned but time feels like it’s moving slower than ever. Christmas finally arrives and you wake up bright and early to Zoom your family to open the presents they sent you. Afterwards, you decide to give yourself the gift of going back to sleep; when you wake up a few hours later, you tidy up the living room, gathering the trash bags of torn wrapping paper and ribbons to take out to the garbage.

You step outside and note Ashton isn’t on his patio like he is most mornings; you’re just about to head back inside when you hear a warm “Merry Christmas” from over the fence.

You turn to see him wearing a smile brighter than his extravagant Christmas lights display and yours combined. “How’s your morning?” He asks earnestly.

You smile back. “It’s good! Slept in a little, Zoomed with the fam. Lowkey but nice.”

“Ohhh. That’s why you weren’t at the window this morning,” he muses. You look at him quizzically and a sheepish look washes over his face. “I’ve maybe noticed that you seem to like tidying up the kitchen around the same time every morning… maybe sometimes when I’m ready to start my stretches, I’ll check to see if you’re at the window yet. Maybe sometimes if you aren’t there yet, I’ll wait.”

You feel yourself flush, flattered. “Here I thought I was being voyeuristic when all along you’re just an exhibitionist,” you smirk.

He chuckles knowingly. "And you're leaving your curtains open all hours of the night for aesthetic reasons?"

You're surprised you don't feel embarrassment, just a sense of pride and overwhelming desire. "You're welcome," you say coyly.

Completely devoid of self-consciousness or hesitation, Ash says seriously, "I'd give anything to come over there and kiss you right now. Touch you. Just feel you."

Your breath catches but you manage to get out, "Six days. Just gotta get through this week. Somehow."

The interaction plays over and over in your mind throughout the course of the day: the confident way he told you he wanted you, the way his gaze seemed to devour you entirely, the simultaneous relief and ache you felt knowing that the yearning that’s been threatening to overtake you has him floundering too.

Six days is a long time, especially when you’ve not so much as grazed another person since the beginning of the year, not to mention you’ve been waiting to get to this place with Ash for over a year.

The idea enters your mind while you’re cleaning up your dinner dishes, peering out the kitchen window he’d freely admitted to using to perform for you. You slip out to the garage, finding the box with your usual Christmas decorations much more easily than you expected. You glance at his living room window, ensuring he’s occupied before heading up to your bedroom to set your plan in motion.

You add as many strings of lights to your bedroom window as you can fit: colored ones, white ones, blinking ones, the ones that get slowly brighter and then dim back down. You stand back and nod to yourself, pleased with your work. You’d certainly call this eye-catching.

You feel more excited than nervous when you see it’s already around the time that Ashton usually heads upstairs for the night. You see the light in his room go on and you wait impatiently, just long enough for you to wonder if you didn’t go far enough with your display. You jump as your phone buzzes on your nightstand with a text message.

“Feeling extra festive tonight?”

You chew your lip, weighing how to play this. “Wanted to be sure I had your attention.”

He types for what feels like a lifetime but all he ends up responding with is: “Oh?”

You push yourself off your bed and go stand in front of your window, responding, “I think I’ve figured out how we get through the next week.”

You see him through his window, shirtless and in his boxers, laying on the bed with his phone. He reads your message and runs his hand over his beard, lost in thought; his head turns towards the direction of your house, pondering, when he notices your illuminated figure. You see him sit straight up and stare in disbelief as it dawns on him that you’re standing at the window, dressed in a lace lingerie set that has him almost feeling dizzy from how fast the blood is rushing to his cock.

He walks over to his own window, needing a closer look; he groans as he takes in every detail: how the red color of the bra and panties contrasts against your skin, how the black lace trim accentuates your curves, how the strappy detailing of the underwear present you as a Christmas gift meant just for him to unwrap. The lights around your window cast a glow around you, making you look like even more of a holiday fever dream come to life.

His eyes meet yours and you hold his gaze as you run your hands slowly down your body; you start by trailing down your neck to the straps of your bra, tracing along the lace outline with your fingers. You give your breasts a firm squeeze as you run your palms over the cups, stopping to use your thumbnail to tease your nipples until they poke through the thin material. Your fingers dance down your torso, swirling around the lines of your belly, pulling at the waistband of your bottoms. You tauntingly skip over your hips entirely, moving to caress your thighs.

Your phone buzzes again and you pause your show to reach for it. “Wish it were me,” Ash’s confession reads.

“In my mind, it is,” you reply, sitting your phone aside to dip into your panties. You lick your lips, in awe of how aroused you are, how aroused you’ve been since you decided to create this situation.

Ashton gulps and if he wasn’t so blinded by lust, he would’ve laughed at how audible the sound was in his ears. He wants to text you back, wants you to know how he’s dying for this week to pass so he can ravish you with the attention you deserve, the attention he should’ve given you a long time ago. But he also doesn’t want your hand to stop moving inside your underwear, so he waits.

You spread your wetness around, teasing yourself slowly. You considered bringing your bullet vibe to the window with you but you figured you were going to be overwhelmed enough and you weren’t going to need any help getting off. You close your eyes as you trace around your clit, not allowing yourself to put much pressure on it just yet, not willing to risk having this be over too soon.

He sees you throw your head back in pleasure, eyes fluttering shut, lips swollen from sucking them between your teeth and he can’t take it anymore. He pulls his cock out through the hole in his boxers and starts stroking, exhaling in relief at how instantly good it feels; he spits in his hand to ease the friction at first but it only takes a few tugs for precum to start trickling from his tip. He groans and pumps faster, knowing this won’t take long.

You press a fingertip inside yourself and moan a lot louder than you expected; you open your eyes and notice his stare remains unwaveringly focused on you, only now his hand is working his cock. He moves rapidly up and down his shaft, seemingly unconcerned with taking it slow. Part of you wishes his movements would slow down so you could get a better look at his dick but you also love that he’s seemingly so turned on by the thought of having you that he needs immediate gratification.

He tries to keep up with you, matching you stroke for stroke as you continue working yourself up, hand speeding up inside your panties, hand pawing at your clothed breast. His rough grip catches on one of the veins running down his cock and he chokes out a strained curse; he notices your mouth keeps forming a perfect O shape as you react to your self pleasure and he lets out his own whimper as he imagines how heavenly your sounds must be.

“I can’t wait to hear you when I make you cum for me.” You softly whine as you read his latest text. You’re nearly there and your head is spinning at the deliberate nature of his words: “When” he makes you cum “for him.” You rub hard at your clit and feel that familiar burning ache building in your core. You swear your wetness increases tenfold as you feel the pulsing begin.

Ashton’s cock leaps in his hand as he witnesses your body tense and shake as your orgasm washes over you; he notices your lips murmuring something and the thought enters his mind that you could be saying his name. He hopes you are.

You’re still waiting for your heart rate to settle, realizing there’s no way it will as long as you’re watching Ash pull at his cock like that. One hand flies over his length, the other firmly clutching his balls; his hips start to move, fucking into his hand as he nears the edge. You’re captivated watching his abs tense, fluttering with intensity until suddenly they’re being coated with cum. The ropes streak his skin and you decide it’s too soon to text him to share how badly you want a taste.

He hangs his head in exhaustion, briefly ducking away from the window to grab a tissue off the dresser; he cleans himself off, tucks his cock back in his boxers and finally looks back up at you. You smile softly at each other, though you’re not sure of the tone; it’s not exactly shy and it’s not entirely wistful. Whatever it is, it’s nice. Hopeful? Satisfied. For now.

You text him, “It’s after midnight now. 5 days.” 

You see him shaking his head, smiling as he types. “Still too far away. Same time tomorrow?”

You grin, shooting off your response before blowing him a kiss goodnight. “Still too far away. Meet you here after yoga tomorrow.”

————-

Taglist issues again so my apologies if you get notif’d more than once (or not at all)

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[galacticlamps]

im sorry im sorry im sorry i know it’s been well over a year but i accidentally thought about Short Trips: Deleted Scenes (again) and it’s killing me (again) so i think im just gonna go ahead and post all these stupid thoughts that have been plaguing me about it since i first heard it & maybe that’ll help clear up some space in my head for like, real life things.

Spoilers I guess? It’s like a year and a half old but also high key the most recent 2nd doctor content i believe we’ve gotten which is like, the only negative thing I can say about it

The TLDR version is this:

I literally cant believe how sweet it is? Painful, but sweet. Like. I don’t honestly know what’s more likely - did they set out to write Jamie a nice little straight love interest and just fail miserably at it by constantly likening her to the Doctor AND paralleling the Doctor’s perspective with her ex’s AND putting Jamie’s relationships with both of them in direct tension with each other while constantly letting his with the Doctor win out?

OR - did they do a very 1960s thing and say hey we’re gonna write what’s essentially a story about how much Jamie and the Doctor love each other and release it on Valentine’s Day thinly disguised as a one-off romance with a french lady?

Now, as a general rule, my attitude toward questions like that is usually “don’t know, don’t care, doesn’t matter” - and while I 100% stand by that, I also have to admit that this particular audio seems to pay enough attention to detail that I’d kind of think I was selling it short if I assumed too many of these things were just meaningless coincidences, you know?

Anyway, that’s the most coherent/overarching thought. And here’s a disorganized list of things I absolutely cannot get over about it (they don’t form any kind of argument, mind, they just all happen to live rent free in my head):

- Celine is first taken in by Jamie being an idiot (specifically him claiming not to speak French, in perfect French); likewise, her entrance in the scene where they actually kiss is marked with a little anecdote about her hat getting stuck on a doornail and her scolding it as she attempts to fix her un-tameable appearance, and the narration says Celine “would often clown for Jamie like this” - all of which, while undeniably adorable, don’t exactly strike me as entirely original traits to have been assigned to Jamie’s love-interest (but also Celine is so cool and her perspective on film/media/time is an excellent addition to the long list of dr who characters)

- When they’re in the present, describing Jamie’s relationship with Celine in 1908, they call him her “companion” and highlight his going nearly everywhere with her, which earns a laugh from the 4th doctor (and me as well, though probably for slightly different reasons - but like, is that really all it takes to have a fling with someone in 60′s era who? bc if so...)

- Celine’s ex-fiance is still in love with her and is jealously watching when she kisses Jamie ... and then the Doctor appears beside him, evidently doing the exact. same. thing. They have the following conversation:

“You know, it’s not prudent to spy on people. But then, people in pain can’t be expected to act prudently.”

“Pain, monsieur? You mistake me.”

“Ah, do I? Good, because I rather thought you’d lost something.”

“What would you know about loss monsieur?”

- I’m sorry doc but who do you think you are, saying stuff like that and smiling sadly at the floor to boot? I 100% had to pause it here the first time I listened, just to not throw my laptop across the room. 

- Then when I recovered continued, the Doctor closes the door so they can’t watch anymore and explains “Possessing things comes so terribly easily to some men that losing them can feel cruel, intolerably cruel. In my experience, only the very best of men cannot be tempted to answer that cruelty with more - I do sincerely hope that you are the best of men.” (guess who gets described as the best of men by the end of the audio?)

- Jamie and the Doctor apparently develop a habit of walking along the river in Paris in silence

- During one such walk, Jamie suggests Celine come with them since she already figured out about the Tardis - and when the Doctor’s worried by this, he says he only allowed Jamie & Celine to grow closer “because of Victoria.” Jamie takes offense at the ‘allowing it’ comment and also refuses to admit he knows what the Doctor means about Victoria, which leads the Doctor to say that he knows how fond Jamie was of her - he was too, of course, but with him, “it was different, wasn’t it?” Jamie only says maybe that’s true and maybe that’s not, but his voice catches until he changes the subject

- Jamie doesn’t see Celine for days both times that she’s recovering from the shock and depression of her work being destroyed. In contrast, when the Doctor’s not well, Jamie’s "afraid” and “guilty” and hardly seems to leave his side at all, if his being there “rushing to embrace him” the second he wakes up - after a period Jamie describes as “at least a week” - is anything to go by, anyway. so either bf writers need to learn how to write a committed straight relationship or admit that’s not what they ever intended in the first place

- Oh yeah, and the Doctor spends that week "asleep” in Jamie’s bedroom - no, there’s no explanation as to if that’s where he was when he first collapsed or if it’s where Jamie decided to take him bc why would they feel the need to explain him being there? why was it even relevant to tell us it was Jamie’s room in the first place?

- The Doctor somehow manages to control the Tardis enough to take Celine on one trip to an alien planet and then return to the correct time & place for her to use the footage she recorded there in her new film - and while the audio doesn’t do very much to explain how that was possible, it does treat this as A Pretty Big Deal, and immediately afterward the Doctor has to spend a week communing with his past self (and/or the Tardis?) debating how likely it is that the Time Lords could use this to trace him. When he decides it’s not worth the risk and they have to stop the film from ever being shown to the public, Jamie asks why he agreed to it in the first place, and all he can say is “Because, Jamie, you asked me to!” earning awkward stares from the crowd.

- Oh, but, lest we forget, that little outburst is also immediately followed by him putting his arm around Jamie’s shoulders, and, shockingly, apparently beginning to actually explain the truth about the danger from the Time Lords - until they’re interrupted, of course idk why exactly but the idea of a 60s dr wanting to come clean with a companion but not being allowed to bc the show demands the war games be something of a reveal hurts me in a very good way

- The mental image of “the Doctor and Jamie, resplendent in borrowed evening wear”

- The audio admitting that Jamie’s not very good at subterfuge, and the Doctor asking if he’s going to be alright with them having to steal the film back from Celine - and Jamie’s little “Aye, Doctor” as he feels a ‘glass arrow piercing his chest’ glad to see bf is reading all my letters about exactly how i feel any time something sad happens to james robert mccrimmon

- The Doctor’s anxious to get out of there for obvious reasons, but he hangs around bc Jamie wants to see Celine again - which doesn’t happen, because of her aforementioned shock & depression, but she does leave Jamie a note that ends “you and that Doctor of yours - look after him Jamie, he loves you dearly, as do I.” yeah, if you didn’t want people to draw a parallel there, you could’ve picked, like, any other wording in the world.

- In case you weren’t fully convinced I’ve been reading too much into this whole audio already, consider this: Celine dies in Long Island in 1968, three days before her birthday - 1968 is when this story would’ve taken place in the show’s history (between Fury & Wheel), and dying three days before/after a birthday in America seems a bit... well I had some deja vu from it, anyway

- Four of all people being the one to bring back the film - I know he does it bc Sarah Jane makes him, but personally, I often feel like despite the length of his run, 4 is the Doctor with which we might’ve gotten the fewest glimpses into his interiority, so the fact that it’s him and not one of the more overtly sentimental Doctors makes it feel like it carries even more weight somehow, to me anyway. I think I wrote a post saying roughly the same thing about 4 & Fate of Krelos/Return to Telos but maybe I only did that inside my own head lol. Still, I’m all for any opportunities for Jamie to be one of the few characters to draw some noticeable emotion out of Four, but in fairness I haven’t touched too much of his EU stuff to really be able to compare the frequency with which this happens with other past companions

- Is Four referring to Two or Jamie when he says he got the film from “an old family friend”? Two did the actual stealing, but he probably means Jamie’s involvement - either way, it’s an interesting way of describing old companions - or selves?

- When Jemima goes to call Jamie a thief, Four is “roused” to defend him: “he really was the very best of men” again, any time four freely shows he cares about someone, im over the moon about it

- Oh ha ha, there’s an audio called “Deleted Scenes” featuring the Doctor who’s most affected by junked episodes. And at the end of it, a character who’s spent her life researching and lecturing about a lost film gets to watch it be ‘rediscovered’ after it’s gone unseen for decades. I feel marginally less stupid for reading into the other details of a story like this when it ends up deciding to be to be clever & slightly meta like that

But yeah

all in all, it’s kind of amazing to me that this genuinely reads like they sat down and said okay boys it’s valentines day, let’s write an audio where jamie kisses a girl, since that hasn’t happened except as a plot device in one story in 1967 - but then when they got down to business they accidentally(?) wrote a story all about how important his bond with the Doctor is and how easily that can be compared to a legitimate love interest (even if the love interest in question is a one off character & the extent of the relationship appears to be like one kiss & then having Jamie spend most of his time around the Doctor instead)

I realize there’s something slightly illogical about writing the words “shipping aside” after a post like this but seriously - no matter how many categories you’re able to see two & jamie’s relationship fitting into, this is 40 minutes of big finish just hitting you over the head with how powerful/special/important that relationship is, and with them being two of my favorite characters, i really haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since

[zettaiunmeis]

HI THANKS TO @raventrigonsdaughter LETTING ME KNOW THAT OG GAME CARMEN AND JULIA USED TO BE PARTNERS BEFORE CARMEN WENT ROGUE, LET ME PROPOSE: VILE!JULIA.

details under the cut because this got Long

jules is part of the either the same class the ~infamous~ black sheep

and they don’t? really like each other? like julia is still kinda Serious and she doesnt really appreciate the vile squad goofing around and tossing water balloons or whatever and black sheep finds julia a little too uptight even if she’s interested in a lot of the same things (history, etc.)

black sheep’s speciality is Being SLick, as we know, but julia’s is patterns (and also historical artifacts)

ok but the important part of this is that bc julia’s is patterns, she ends up being like a scout or smth along those lines bc she can analyse patterns and report back to help plan the caper

and that basically means that when she graduates, she ends up in far more long cons than any of the others

anyway, after black sheep gets in trouble for the water balloon thing, the faculty decide she’s far too mischievous, and so, they assign her a partner — julia

(side note: its kind of the same thing that ends up happening to jean-luc and antonio a bit later on, but thats more because they work well together, and less bc either one of them needed a grounding influence)

anyway black sheep and jules again. do not like each other. but that doesnt mean they dont work well together — julia’s got an eye for patterns, and black sheep has every thieving trick in the book ready and waiting up her sleeves (alongside an instinct for thievery)

slowly, as they are forced to work together more and more, they kind of reach a less tense partnership and then one day black sheep makes a history joke and thats how they become friends

like julia is still very pointedly Not friends with the rest of the vile squad bc they’re still very reckless and immature, etc

but shes sort of seen black sheep when she’s been more grounded and less hyper/feral and she?? kind of doesnt mind??

bc grounded black sheep isnt constantly trying to prove that she’s The Best and grounded black sheep isnt trying to prove that she’s more than just the teacher’s pet — she’s kind of just having fun with julia and julia’s been so serious about her training that she hasnt really made any other friends and…. its nice

its nice to have black sheep loudly slip into the seat next to her and and tease julia about whatever recent historical discovery she’s researching and pull her out of her own head once in a while

and its nice to have black sheep glance over in the middle of class when sheena — sorry tigress — whines about something or the other and roll her eyes in the same way julia feels like doing, even if something strange sticks in her throat when carmen does the same with gray

she can’t pinpoint the exact moment, but at some point, she starts thinking of black sheep as her friend and it’s an exciting enough thought that she’s got a little smile on her face next time black sheep slips into the seat next to her in professor maelstrom’s class

and at some point julia stops being just julia to black sheep, and starts being jules because we’re in a school for thieves, but we’ve already got plenty of ~jules~ right here and thats sincerely the worst joke i’ve ever heard and oh really ~jules~? bet i could find an even worse one

and like all the usual stuff is still happening in the background — shadowsan-black sheep rivalry, gray and the Squad being black sheep’s friends, the phone and player, etc.

its just that now, black sheep has a bit of a calming influence and that does help!

and they work well enough that most people assume that julia and black sheep will be partners after graduation 

even crackle acknowledges it — despite the jealousy he feels at the knowledge

so things continue and all this happens, but then comes finals.

things go the same. black sheep gets perfect scores in all of her exams, except stealth 101

julia — now the historian — can’t help but check for whether black sheep graduated too and just as she does, she hears crackle say it: she didn’t pass

and she wants to go to black sheep and ask if she’s okay because everyone knows how much black sheep’s wanted this, how much she’s been working for it, but by the time gray’s been dragged off by tigress, black sheep has disappeared and julia has no idea where she’s gone

so she waits for a bit in the cafeteria and in the dorms and anywhere else she thinks that black sheep would be and she sees… nothing

and about twelve hours after the results, the faculty pulls her for her first mission (for context, this is before the whole,,, hear the true name of vile thing) which is basically being a plant for the morocco mission, by pretending to be an archaeology phd student from oxford who’s come to study the findings in the excavation

and she’s busy enough with that that she barely gets to think about black sheep or graduation or anything other than the near-overwhelming anxiety that comes with the horrifying ordeal of potentially being Known but she just manages to figure out like,,, guard rotations, as well as the exact objects that are at the site for the vile squad to steal

and then she’s out before they even get there — julia’s pattern recognition and historical knowledge made her pretty useful when it comes to planning capers so it meant that she’s always travelling around the world ahead of each caper, but would also make her a pretty invaluable asset to vile, so they can’t afford to get her caught

julia doesnt hear about black sheep nearly messing up morocco until much later, and even then, she doesn’t have all the info

all she can do is wonder why the hell the faculty would fail someone who somehow managed to sneak out of vile island without anyone realising until much later

and yes, maybe a part of her misses her old partner, but she knows that it wouldn’t matter anyway — she was the mole, and she’d barely get to work directly with carmen so.

but then cut to a year later, when a vile counterfeit operation in boston is suddenly sabotaged

cut to the moment when, julia, despite not having seen her in a year, is still able to somehow recognise black sheep’s work

its Slick. its the Slickness that tips her off, and part of her is reluctant to tell the faculty who it is, but her allegiance demands it and she tells the faculty and she hates herself for it when she sees the murderous rage on each of their faces

and somehow, that — her ability to recognise this carmen sandiego — gets her in a new position, as a mole in interpol, passing on the information they get as they try to track the scarlet super thief as well

and then one day, in poitiers, julia sees her

its black sheep. it’s undeniably black sheep under that red trench coat and julia wants to go and talk to her capture her and bring her in to vile but her new partner ~chase devineaux~ is everything that once made her turn away from her interest in law enforcement and he orders her to call for backup while he tries to stroke his own ego

she does, of course, but maybe she delays it a bit, if only because she’d rather let carmen sandiego get away than have devineaux’s ego get any bigger

and the rest of the season goes much the same except after julia ends up in acme, she reports to vile about everything that’s going on, and they no longer suspect devineaux of helping carmen etc etc

and she can’t help but somewhat sympathise with what carmen’s doing — she’s returning invaluable historical artefacts and julia’s always loved history and- it’s just… altruistic. and that’s admirable. and that’s the only reason i feel so torn about helping vile. that’s it, that’s the only reason.

and then comes the chasing paper caper

what was originally the first real conversation between julia and carmen goes completely differently

(note that most vile operative outside of jules’ graduating class do not know of her existence bc she barely interacts with most of them since she’s more a spy/mole who’s out of the picture by the time anyone else gets on the scene)

carmen still needs to be able to spy on paper star without anyone noticing, so she still goes for the seat right in front of the cute short-haired girl sitting alo- and oh my god jules?

and its the first time julia has heard that nickname in over a year and oh God they were just friends this should Not hit this hard what the Heck

and carmen still sits down and just quietly grills her as to what the hell is going on bc she Knows that jules is a always a mole and never an active part of a caper and she doesn’t?? understand??

and jules is kind of in a daze, but she’s been Trained so she feeds carmen her cover story:

she defected from vile when she saw how they were treating historical artefacts — melting down gold, selling priceless works of art to the highest bidder, etc. etc. — and that since then she’s been silently helping interpol with taking down vile ops, etc.

and it takes a bit but carmen kind of starts to believe it — she knows julia loves history with all her heart, and she’s… well, she’s never been the kind of recruit that carmen’s expected to see in vile anyway, so. it’s not out of the realm of possibility, is it, for julia to be a defector working against vile? after all, isn’t she the same?

so she starts looking around, while waiting for paper star to make a move, and she ends up noticing the briefcase in the seat next to her, and for some reason, those initials — clearly chase devineaux — make her want to scowl

“new partner?” “oh… its… well, work. work... partner” “oh.”

uhhh anyway i might actually. write this? idk don’t count on anything lmaooo.

[peppusae]

How to say 'I love you' without saying 'I love you' | Chae Hyungwon pt 3

part: 3 of 3

other parts: pt 1 || pt 2 || pt 3

pairing: chae hyungwon x reader

genre: fluff, and LOTS OF SMUT

word count: 7.6k words

note: so. the smut is here. can you believe i had a dream about hyungwon doing this SAME thing here, in my dream? i will RIOT

How to say 'I love you' without saying 'I love you’.

It’s an hour after you arrived, that there is a knock on your dorm room.

When you open the door, Hyungwon stands in front of your door, and you honestly have already missed him so much that you want to hug him.

“I just arrived.”

“Didn’t you want to change and get some rest first?”

“I… I didn’t want to wait a single moment after I came here, so I washed up before we headed out.” He mumbles, a sheepish smile on his face as he motions for you to step outside.

Awww!!!

“Where are we going, Hyungwonnie?” You ask, taking your wallet and bag before you follow him out to the hallway.

“This will be our first date, so we have to go somewhere nice, right?”

You can’t hide the big goofy smile on your face, and it looks like Hyungwon is really proud of himself.

“I didn’t know you were so romantic.”

“Like I said, there are a lot of things you don’t know about me.” He has to say, reaching for the back pocket of his jeans and handing you a single white rose.

A grin forms on your face while you accept the flower look at him, dumbfounded. “Where on Earth did you get the time to plan this?!”

“[Name]-ah, the flower shop near the restaurant next door doesn’t close until 10, did you think I would come to our first date empty handed?”

“I swear, I’m at a loss for words.” You have to say, watching him give a thumbs up and hurry to grab your hand. You hadn’t had a chance to imagine what Hyungwon would be like when he was dating someone, so every little thing he was doing came out as a pleasant surprise for you.

It’s nice to walk freely in the Seoul streets at this time of the night when there are only a few people around and you can wear masks. Hyungwon seems to be at ease as well, and you’re not surprised when he takes you to your favorite cafe a few blocks from the building.

“I think I found another reason to love this cafe even more,” he has to say, as you two enter one of the private booths. “I always loved this place because I can eat in peace here, but now I can come here often on dates with you.”

“You’re so cheesy, Are you really the Chae Hyungwon that hugged me just a few hours ago?”

This makes Hyungwon’s cheeks flush a little - you’re so glad he lowered his mask! - and you have an idea of why, even before he speaks next.

“Well, are you really the [First Name] [Last Name] that... kissed me a few hours ago?”

It’s adorable, the way he said it in a pouty way but hesitated a little in embarrassment. It makes you wonder if things between you and Hyungwon will continue to be like this.

You take a few minutes to decide what to order, and the food arrives in a little while.

Because Hyungwon had already eaten so well at the barbeque during the shooting, he simply had a drink. This meant that his focus was on you and just you. And for the first time, you become a little self-conscious because you’ve caught Hyungwon staring at you multiple times before, but this is the first time he watches you after you knew he had feelings for you.

“Why do you keep looking at me like I’m some kind of seafood pancake?”

Hyungwon chuckles, stirring the ice in his Iced Americano. “I have something I’m curious about.”

“Yes?”

“When did you start to like me?”

The sudden question makes you almost choke on your strawberry drink. Well, you had expected this question - And you were going to ask this from him as well, but jeez, Hyungwon really wastes no time. 

“I’m asking because you started crying when you found out I liked you.”

You suddenly want to dig a hole and crawl inside and never come out again, and for some reason, this feels so much more like old times when you two had wholesome conversations till Hyungwon’s manager calls him.

There were a few occasions when he stayed past the scheduled time, even though he had to pay a lot of his money for the late fine rule Monsta X has.

The sudden thought makes you giggle.

“What, what?”

“Nothing, nothing! And you’re right! I did like you before too, but I didn’t realize it until you were going to confess to me, and that scared me so much because of Dawon, and also because… I’m just a writer for the company, that’s all..” You look up from your plate of food and you see that Hyungwon is looking at you, eyebrows a little furrowed.

“But when I went back home to Incheon, my mom said this was all happening because I was being a whiny baby and I should just let you forget me if I was going to keep on crying and not doing anything about it.”

Hyungwon bursts out laughing, and he actually chokes on his drink. You have to get up from your seat and pat his back multiple times before he is able to drink some water.

“That wasn’t something I wanted to show you during our first date…” He mumbles, shaking his head. “So, I have your mom to thank for this, huh? Was she the one who also asked you to ki-”

“Nope, that was Minhyuk’s idea.”

Hyungwon’s eyes go wide again, ears going red once again.

“What?! How does Minhyuk know?”

“Because,” you start, “He knew we liked each other and he was trying to get us together, not get in between us like you thought and blamed me for!”

This makes Hyungwon put his face on the table, like he was really regretting his actions. You hear a whiny ‘Uggggggh I’m so stupid!’ before he lifts his head up and sighs.

“About what you said earlier,” he starts instead, “When have I ever treated you like you’re just some staff member? You should have known that I wasn’t treating you with simple polite smiles and greets like I do with the other staff. You’re the only person I go for meals with, and the only person I buy strawberries for when you do a good job with work. So don’t ever say something like you being ‘just a staff member’. I’ll get mad.”

His words sound so sincere, like he is genuinely baffled that you would remain oblivious to his feelings.

“Fine, I won’t. I promise. Now tell me when you started liking me?” You smile, eating some food while Hyungwon seems to ponder about your query for a moment.

“Do you remember that time we shared the same schedule in Inkigayo with Shinee-sunbaenim?”

This makes you gape, looking at him in utter disbelief.

“What-”

“When Minhyuk gave you the signed copy of 1 of 1, you looked so pretty when you smiled.” Hyungwon grins, hand rubbing on the nape of his neck. “You smiled so brightly, and I wished I was the one that earned such a pretty smile from you. I knew I liked you since then.”

“But Hyungwon-ah, that was… That wasn’t even long since I started working for you guys!”

This earns a big grin from Hyungwon, nodding as he speaks. “I’m good at keeping secrets.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? It’s been four years…”

“I liked you since then, and I can’t keep my eyes off from you… But because I’m a celebrity…”

This makes you mumble a little ‘Ah..’ giving a nod. You’re not sure what he is implying by saying that, but the fact that he’s here with you right now, looking at you with so much love in his eyes… It really doesn’t matter.

“I really wanted to be sure what kind of feelings I had for you. I just know that whenever you play with Jooheon or Minhyuk I get mad jealous. I guess you never noticed that I always take you for breakfast the next day after you do that, so that I can get you to look at me.”

You never noticed that that happened as a pattern, so your mouth is hung agape while Hyungwon bursts out laughing.

“That’s why I know you like me. You’ve been giving me happier smiles after I started to sing for you.”

“Because you sound so dumb!” You two burst out laughing together in unison.

“That really made me think you liked me too, so I got the confidence to ask you out.”

“But I’m just surprised you like me, out of everyone…”

“You’re not going to start saying something like you not being pretty enough for me, like the girls in dramas do, right?”

He completely read your mind!

“It’s true, though, you have to admit I look mediocre compared to you.”

“Shut up. I just told you I fell in love with you because you looked so pretty when you smiled.” He says, which in turn makes you clench your hands at the butterflies forming in your stomach; It’s the first time he said he loves you, not just that he likes you!!!

“I don’t believe in liking someone just by looks, even if I just said that. My heart just grew to like you more and more everyday after I got the chance to easily hang out with you often. It’s not just the looks, you should know this well, [Name]-ah. You’ve seen my face for years but you didn’t feel a thing for me until recently, right?”

“Heheee,” you find yourself nodding, which makes Hyungwon smile back at you.

You can’t help but to look at Hyungwon so fondly. You two barely made it, if anything, and you can’t stop smiling at how happy and how normal it feels, to look at Hyungwon and have your heart racing.

“Yah. Stop staring, you don’t even look at me that much when I’m shooting something.”

“True, I’m always looking at Joo because he’s so cute!”

“Hey!!!”

 ---

 Hyungwon is an absolute gentleman.

The first time you learned this was when he dropped you at your door after your first date, a gentle hand at the small of your back until you reached the company; after which he maintained a little distance.

Because he has different schedules every day, you don’t get to go out to eat with Hyungwon as often as you would like. You still find him hanging by the lounge having lunch with random members occasionally.

The lunch thing becomes a little too frequent as the days pass by, and Hyungwon lets you know that he told the rest of the members beside Minhyuk, and they had decided to help him out, getting out with him with lunch as the excuse.

Today it’s Kihyun and Minhyuk seated in front of you while Hyungwon seats by your side.

“Until how long do you two plan to hide from the company that you’re dating?” Kihyun wants to know, out of nowhere, dipping some fish into the soy sauce.

Both you and Hyungwon hiss, eyes widening that the topic of you two dating is even brought up.

“Heh, you think no one will notice where Hyungwonnie always disappears as soon as his schedule is over every night?” Minhyuk adds more fuel to the fire. “Or not even notice Hyungwonnie entering [Name]-ah’s room every ni-”

“Shut up, you’re gonna give everyone the wrong idea if you say stuff like that!” You hiss, shaking your head. Hyungwon doesn’t say anything, looking very embarrassed and avoiding eye contact with you. His action makes you feel flustered, recalling all the nights he stopped by your room before he went to sleep, just to laze on your bed and kiss you till he’s too sleepy to continue - or gets a call from a manager.

Both of your reactions make the matter only worse, making Kihyun’s eyes go really wide, turning to Minhyuk who has a knowing smirk on his face. That little idiot. He knows nothing and always acts like a snake.

But then again, he adds that spice to variety shows that you, as a writer, always get pleasantly surprised at. So you can’t say you hate it.

“You two are adults and all, but-”

“Ah, please stop!” Hyungwon begs, tapping his chopsticks on the table and creating a little ruckus to interrupt whatever Kihyun was trying to say.

“Kihyunie may be stupid but he has a point this time, kids.” Minhyuk says.

“Who are you calling stupid?!”

“Who are you calling kid?!”

 ---

 It’s a couple nights since then, and Hyungwon finished his practice ‘early’, so he pops into your room at 01:39 am.

It’s actually quite an ungodly hour of the night; you would have been sleeping at this hour if you hadn’t started dating Hyungwon. But even if he pops by for only five minutes, it is worth every second and the amount of coffee you’d have to drink the next morning while you doze off.

“Finished everything?” You ask, smiling up at Hyungwon who is wearing a sky blue sweater, and gray sweats. His hair is still a little damp in some places, like he had used his hair-dryer in a crazed frenzy.

The male nods, closing the door behind him and tightly locking the door. You hurry towards him, and you’re able to see the way he breaks into a smile right before he embraces you.

“I was drained out last night, that’s why I couldn’t drop by to see you.” Hyungwon lets you know, his nimble fingers carding through the locks of your hair softly.

“You must be so tired.” You give a little pout, patting his hair. The male glances at you, smiling at the cute action and giving a little nod.

“I have a really early schedule tomorrow morning, but I’ll have the rest of the day off. Can I come to you then?”

You nod, standing on your tippy-toes, and then pulling on the collar of Hyungwon’s shirt - he’s that tall, yes - and pressing your lips to his.

It’s so gentle; from the way he kisses you, the way his lips graze on your bottom lip, the way he softly licks your bottom lip and has both his arms around your waist. You can feel the heat from his body and every warm breath of his, and you end up sighing into the kiss which makes Hyungwon move a little for air and look at you.

It’s a little embarrassing so your cheeks are flushed but Hyungwon breaks into a grin, pulling you for a hug this time.

“I’ll meet you for lunch tomorrow.”

You give him a wave, watching him pull down his hoodie as best as he can and running across the hallway to his room.

The next day, there is a downpour. You get a text from Kihyun that the boys are in the recording studio for their schedule and you’re thankful that he didn’t have to go somewhere far away and would be unable to come back in time for lunch.

Since you and Shownu share a similar diet plan, you’re having lunch with the male when Hyungwon finishes up his schedule and finally sits down beside you. He looks like he had a long day, as he does not talk much while he eats black bean noodles in a jiffy.

“Good luck!” Shownu gives you a suspicious thumbs up, which makes you very confused while Hyungwon hurries to lead you back to your room. You still had some pages of work left to write up, so you find yourself sitting by the headboard of your bed while the male reads some manhwa from his phone.

This is actually quite a common occurrence recently; doing your own thing but with each other’s company. You like the way you would snuggle beside Hyungwon and kiss his cheek while he’s reading some documents, and he would give in and pull you to his lap so he can kiss you better.

And the other days are like today, where Hyungwon is the one who comes up to you, peeking at your laptop, playing with your hair, and trying to distract you with soft kisses.

If anything, it is working, and you can’t ignore the way he mumbles your name and looks at you like a little child waiting for playtime.

“You’re a grown-up, yet, you act like a kid.” You comment, putting away your laptop for the day and opening your arms. Hyungwon smiles, watching you lie on the bed, facing him.

“I have some good news, [Name]-ah.”

“What is it?”

“One of the songs I wrote is going to be on the upcoming album!” He says, hugging you tightly. Your eyes go wide in surprise, and thinking about all the times he had been complaining about how much revisions he had to do feels worthwhile. You grin, giving him a kiss on his forehead.

“I can’t wait for it, Hyungwon-ah.”

“I just recorded it earlier today.” He lets you know, “I can’t wait for you to hear it.”

“I’m so proud of you.” You let him know, genuinely. You smile at him fondly, and it looks like he could see your sincerity in your eyes, before he pulls you to him and pecks your lips.

Minutes change to hours, and it’s already evening when you two wake up from a nap you didn’t even realize you two had drifted off to. Hyungwon stirs in his sleep, one eye opening when you pull his arm off from you and get up to drink some water. When he realizes he was still in your room, he sits up, pointing at the water bottle now in your hand. You bring the bottle to him, watching him take a couple of sips.

It is while he hands you the bottle that the rough fabric of your sweater rubs against your nipple, and you drop the bottle to the floor at the sensitive feeling.

“What? What’s wrong?” Hyungwon looks at you, alarmed, when he sees you bending down to pick the bottle up in a hurry. “Are you okay?”

You give a nod, taking a step back.

“Why are you acting weird out of nowhere?”

How do I tell him that this is a totally normal thing for girls when we don’t wear a bra? You look at him panickedly, taking a step back when he gets off from the bed and comes towards you. The action makes you flinch again, and you can’t help letting out a little ‘ow’.

“Yah. What’s going on? Are you hurt?” He asks, grabbing your wrists before you can flee with the excuse of getting snacks or something. By now, your face is all sweaty and completely red from embarrassment, and you can’t help but pray that Hyungwon does not notice.

“I’m fine!” You say, and your words and actions are probably not matching because Hyungwon furrows his eyebrows at you, while you feel your eyes getting a little teary from the embarrassment.

“You… Why are you crying?”

God damn it, Hyungwon sure is persistent.

“I told you, nothing is wrong-”

“Yah. You obviously do not look fine. We already had such a big misunderstanding because we couldn’t say what we wanted to, so I don’t want something like that to happen again. We barely made it to this point now, so if you don’t tell me why you’re crying right now, I’m going to get very angry.”

You appreciate that he is thinking about your benefit, but you can tell there is no way he would let go of your wrist unless you tell him the truth.

And that is why you smack your face to his chest, and just take a deep sigh while Hyungwon wraps his free hand around your waist, almost out of habit.

“It’s just a random girl thing and this does not mean I’m horny or anything, okay?! But my… nipples… are hard so it’s ...sensitive.”

There is no response, and you wonder if Hyungwon even heard what you said. Your face feels like it’s on fire as you continue to talk, if only to break the silence.

“It’s just something that happens to girls when we’re not wearing a bra, that’s all… That’s why I kept saying I’m fine…”

Still, silence.

You’re very embarrassed, especially because Hyungwon had instinctively pulled you closer to him, so your chest was already pressed against his. When you move a step away and look up at Hyungwon, you’re absolutely startled to see that his face is completely flushed red, eyes unblinking and just looking at you while you take another step away - and yet, he does not let go of your wrist.

“Yah, what are you saying!” He finally reacts, letting go of your wrist and looking away from you. “Y-You didn’t have to tell me all that!”

“You made me say it though????”

Hyungwon moves another step away, eyes on the floor, mumbling something inaudible under his breath.

“Yah, just ignore what I said, let me just go and change, then it’ll be f-” Your sentence is interrupted when Hyungwon grabs your wrist once again, shaking his head.

“What-”

“I-I’ve wanted you for ages, and now that I finally have you, you… you should stop saying things that make it impossible for me to h-hold in what I feel for you,” he mumbles so quietly that you barely hear him, “Because it’s really, really hard for me.”

Despite how startled you are at his confession, the look in his eyes is so vulnerable, his ears and cheeks still so bright red while he lets go of your wrist, this time in favor of intertwining your fingers with his.

“If you…” His voice trails down, taking a step back and pulling you along, up till he is seated on the bed. He does not look away from you for a single second, then pats his lap, looking at your every action. You feel flustered but do as he instructed, seating yourself on top of his lap and watching as he leans against the headboard before he wraps his long slender arms around your back.

Hyungwon’s lips meet with yours, and this is the first time since the very first kiss, where all the gentleness is gone and he is kissing you like he might go crazy if he didn’t. You gasp when he lightly bites on your bottom lip, using the opportunity to slide his tongue in your mouth.

Your heart is racing like crazy, and it does not help that he has his hands under the fabric of your sweater, warm fingers gripping your hips and back as he kisses you deeper. Your lips are trembling when he pecks your lips softly once before he moves away and looks at you, wordlessly. You wonder if you should say something, but as soon as he glances at you, he pulls one hand up to clutch your cheek, face moving towards your neck and pressing his warm lips on your collarbone.

The new action makes your eyes wide, pressing your lips tight together as he kisses your neck, peppering soft pecks on both sides of your neck, his tongue and lips working together and softly sucking at the skin enough to leave a bruise.

This earns a gasp on your side, and Hyungwon looks back up at you, and you’re even more startled when you see that his eyes have darkened a little, watching you with hooded eyes that feel almost too sinful to look at.

“Hyungwon-ah…”

“I won’t stop unless you ask me to.” He says, and you don’t have time to respond - to even say you don’t want him to stop - before his lips meet with your neck once again, another peck on your collarbone until Hyungwon runs out of your exposed skin.

“Take it off.” He orders, pulling at the hem of your sweater. Your thoughts are traveling a mile a minute up till then, going blank when he says that and looks at you, light tugs of your sweater continuously reminding you of his request. You look at Hyungwon with wide eyes, the embarrassment from before replaced by the one due to his order. You lower your hands from around his neck, hesitating a little in embarrassment.

“Do you want to stop here?” He asks when you pause, a little smile forming on his face when you shake your head in response. “Then, are you embarrassed?”

When you nod your head, Hyungwon pulls his hands away from the bare skin of your back, before he begins unbuttoning his own shirt.

With every button that comes undone you become more impatient, watching him discard the shirt, looking at you with longing in his eyes while you slowly run a hand over his bare skin. You feel a little relieved that his skin is just as warm as your felt, and you lean in a little to kiss his lips.

Hyungwon holds your arms while you have your clutches on his cheeks, kisses becoming more and more desperate until he moves you away and takes a deep breath.

You reach for the hem of your sweater again, this time pulling it over your head and throwing it away. You can’t get yourself to meet eyes with him just yet, still feeling embarrassed about showing your bare body to Hyungwon for the very first time. When there is no reaction from his side, you finally glance back up at his face, and find him looking at your newly exposed skin with lustful eyes. He reaches a hand out to grab one of your breasts, giving it a squeeze that makes you gasp. Hyungwon tilts his head up to kiss you once more, both hands grabbing your mounds and thumb rubbing against your nipples. You bite your bottom lip as he presses a soft kiss on one of your breasts, and when he licks your nipple, you let out the first moan.

This makes Hyungwon jolt up his head in surprise, watching your face as your chest heaves up and down. You think there’s a smirk on his face when he kisses the other nipple, softly sucking in such sinfulness that makes you tilt your head back, clutching a chunk of his hair in failed attempts to hide your moans. You can feel your core getting wetter with every little action of his lips over your sensitive buds.

“Hyungwon-ah, please…” Your voice trails off and he finally lifts his head up, looking at you with hazy eyes, and when he leans in to kiss your lips again do you notice Hyungwon’s hard on pressing from where you are seated on his lap. You mumble his name again impatiently, watching as he softly wraps both arms around your back once again, kissing your lips as he leans forward, making you slowly fall back down onto the bed with a little ‘oh!’.

It’s a different kind of feeling when Hyungwon gets on top of you, hands pulling down your sweatpants to expose your bare legs and panties that are getting wetter with every one of his ministrations. You’ve started to get used to Hyungwon staring at you in general, but this is the first time he looks at you with his lips parted slightly, eyes dark from lust as he kisses your thigh, another hand raking his nails on your skin and not even letting you catch your breath.

“Hyungwon-ah.” You mumble, watching him lift his figure from over you in favor of unbuttoning his trousers, and god damn. You thought you might end right then and there; watching the way his eyes never leave yours while he throws the clothing and presses the visible bulge in his boxers against you.

It’s so, so close, and your moan comes out as a whine as he bucks his hips against you once again. A faint smile forms on his face, affectionately kissing your cheek while he presses his chest against yours.

“[Name]-ah.”

You hum, eyes still closed at how painfully agonizing it feels as he grinds against you. You can barely hold yourself, and it seems like Hyungwon felt the same way, lifting the side of your panties and sliding a finger inside your wet cunt.

Your eyes fly wide open at that, a loud gasp leaving from your mouth. Hyungwon’s face is so close to you, his warm hot breath on your face as he watches your every action. While one hand holds his weight over you, the other pulls your panties down enough so he can easily rub his long, nimble fingers over your clit.

When you let out a moan and close your eyes, Hyungwon softly calls your name once again. You open your eyes, chest rising up and down like crazy now that he has inserted another finger and is rubbing on your clit so maddeningly slowly.

“Hyungwon-ah, please.”

“[Name]-ah.” He presses a kiss on your neck, two fingers knuckle-deep inside you while his thumb roughly rubs on your nub. Your legs have started shaking a bit, especially now that he bends his fingers inside your cunt, as if trying to find something - and he does, such a sweet spot that has your moans increasing in frequency and has Hyungwon watching eyes full of lust and confidence that he is the only one who can see you melt under his touches.

You actually have tears in your eyes when he removes his fingers, coated heavily with your warm fluids. Hyungwon uses his thumb to part your lips, putting his fingers in your mouth and watching you suck all of the juices clean. The bulge in his boxers become more prominent, and you can tell he is holding himself as best as he can before he settles between your legs.

You don’t have a moment to even sigh, before he wraps his arms around your thighs, opening up your pussy up for him to stick his wet tongue inside.

“Oh, Hyungwon-ah.” You moan out his name, once again making him lift his head up and look at you in utter bafflement and thirst. 

“You will drive me crazy before I can.” He lets you know, sighing before he licks your clit, tongue rolling circles around the sensitive little spot and making you moan nastily once again. Hyungwon moves his tongue inside your warmth, licking off all your juices and holding your thighs tight apart when you make the slightest hint of closing your legs.

As if his tongue isn’t sinful enough, he lets go of one of your thighs to scissor his fingers inside your heat. You feel a foreign ache in your abdomen, one that knots harder and harder each time Hyungwon sucks on your clit, rubbing his tongue over and over until you’re moaning his name so loud that he has to warn you to be quiet or he would stop.

So you try your best to do as he said, grabbing two handfuls of Hyungwon’s hair and mumbling his name, arching your back in pleasure at how warm his tongue is.

It’s when Hyungwon starts to curl his fingers deep inside you with a simultaneous harsh suck on your clit that you come undone, all over his face, electricity surging through your veins like crazy. Despite your embarrassment, he licks you off clean, sitting up and using the back of his palm to wipe off your juices that had dribbled down his chin.

The entire scene is so scandalous and so seductive that you sigh, sitting up to meet eyes with Hyungwon before pulling him close to kiss him.

“Hyungwon-ah.”

“Okay.” He nods, and you’re not sure how he exactly read your mind, but you’re relieved when he gets off from the bed, pulling down his boxer pants. His erection is hard, and pulsing, and when he makes his way to the bed, you stop him, getting off from the bed yourself and dropping on your knees in front of his length.

Your sudden action, paired with the way you wrap your fingers around his length makes Hyungwon gasp, eyes widened when you look up at him. The tip of his length is already oozing from desire, and you lick off the juices, the sweet sound of his first moan of the night almost driving you insane. You need to hear that again.

And again.

And again, you run your tongue on his length, and you can already tell that he is impatient, in the way he has grabbed a chunk of your hair and guides your mouth to his tip.

You grab the end of his length, palming it gently as you take him inside your mouth, the sound of your saliva rubbing over his length earning a guttural groan from Hyungwon. You take him in as much as you can,  bobbing your head back and forth and sighing at the way the base of his cock reaches your throat. This earns yet another groan from Hyungwon, his grip on your hair tighter as he bucks his hips in motion with your sinful mouth taking his length in. 

“[Name]-ah.” He mumbles in a moan when you rub your tongue on his tip, much like the way he had been ravishing your clit just minutes ago. The thought makes you moan while you take his length in again, eyes going up to see Hyungwon’s face redder than you had ever seen it before, his entire body trembling as he clutches your hair tight and fucks your mouth like he was going insane.

And that’s exactly the way he felt, and you could tell in the way you can feel his cock throb in your hands, each time his length goes deep inside you while you rub the base.

“[Name]-ah, you’re so-” His words halt when you take his entire length inside slowly, and it takes all of his willpower to not tremble and buck inside you, a loud moan escaping through his beautiful lips and you can’t help keep your eyes locked with his. And he tries his best to watch you, but with every time your tongue rubs at the bottom of his cock each time you take him in, his eyes shut tight, a mixture of groans and moans filling the entire room until he lets go; coming undone all over your mouth.

“[Name]-ah.” He sighs, catching his breath as he watches the way you open your mouth to take in the liquid the oozes out of his tip, licking everything off his tip and rubbing your tongue over your lips to lick off the remains. Hyungwon watches you in what feels like a daze, eyes filled with lust while he gives you a hand and pulls you up.

You think he was about to say something before you press your lips to his, bodies in contact and tasting each other’s fluid in each other’s mouth. The thought itself is enough to drive you crazy, and the way his hands slowly grabs your ass and you feel his length rubbing dangerously close to your wetness makes you moan into his neck.

It felt like Hyungwon thought the same, his kisses so desperate as he leads you towards the bed, making you sit down and lean back as he kisses you till you’re laying on the bed again,

“You’re still not asking me to stop.”

“I don’t want you to stop, Hyungwon-ah.” You say, spreading your legs enough just to feel his tip rubbing on you once again.

Hyungwon looks at you, lips parted a little before he sinks a finger inside you, as if to check just how wet you were. Satisfied with the warm wetness pooled in your core, he gets off from you and reaches for his earlier discarded trouser pocket. You are absolutely baffled when he pulls out a wallet and takes a square-shaped packet before he makes his way on top of you again.

“You had planned this long ago, didn’t you?” You can’t help but ask, and Hyungwon shakes his head, chuckling and kissing your cheek.

“No, I really didn’t expect this to happen today, but since we’re guys, we get a big stock of these and we’re always asked to carry one wherever we go.” He laughs, pecking your lips. “I only did this starting from when we were going out, because I wanted you so bad and I didn’t know for how long I could keep my cool.”

You smile, hands on his cheeks and pulling him into a kiss. “You don’t need to anymore. I want you too, Hyungwon-ah.”

Hyungwon sighs into the kiss, and when you rub your tongue on his lips, he pulls himself up from you and you whine at the loss of contact. You watch as he grins at your action, trying his best to take the condom out and sheath his hard, throbbing cock before he looks at you once again.

You open up your arms, and watch as the male comes to you, pressing a kiss onto your lips before he rubs his tip on you once again. You let out another impatient whine, looking at Hyungwon who has his eyes on you as he very slowly inserts his member into your wetness.

You both gasp at the foreign feeling, and Hyungwon intertwines your fingers, resting your hands on the bed as he presses his entire body on yours and leans in to kiss you again.

“Are you okay?” He asks, and his voice is so gentle that the little tears forming in your eyes from his length - god is he big, you didn’t realize until he got inside you - streams down from the corners of your eyes.

“I love you.”

The worry in Hyungwon’s eyes goes away when you tell him that. It’s the first time you had told him that, in response to what he said on your first date and told you he was in love with you.

Such a beautiful smile forms on his face, eyes so full of affection that he loosens one hand free to press it on your cheek, pecking your lips again.

“Hyungwon-ah.” You call softly, and he nods, making him prop one arm on the bed while the other pins your wrist down. Lifting his weight up, he removes his length from inside you, only to buck into your hips and have his tip reaching all the way to the hilt so fast that it has you moaning instantly.

“I love you too. So much.” He says, eyes never leaving you, even for a second as he plunges his length in and out of you. He groans in content at the way your warmth feels, even through the sheath of the condom he has on.

You wrap your free hand around his neck, pulling him even closer. Hyungwon sighs at the contact, a hand reaching to clutch on your breast, and you let out a little cry at the way his squeezes match each of his thrusts. You unconsciously find yourself clenching your walls, the new tightness making a throaty groan escape from Hyungwon’s lips. When you open your eyes, you see Hyungwon biting his bottom lip as bucks his hips and pushes his length inside you, head tilted a little to the back in pleasure while you continue to clench around his member.

You two’s moans fill the room, the sound of sweaty skin slapping together making you wetter and Hyungwon to push inside you with hooded eyes, so you sink your nails into his back; earning another groan from Hyungwon.

“On all fours.” Comes his second order of the night, and you’re whining a little when he pulls his length out of you. You sit up, turning around, hands and knees on the bed. The excitement you feel at not seeing what Hyungwon is up to is insane, and when he presses on your back and pushes his length inside you again, you can’t help but mewl a little.

“Hyungwon-ah!” You cry out, feeling embarrassed when he holds your hips with one hand and uses the other to rub at your clit. The pleasure you feel at being so, so filled up like this makes you unable to control your moans, and you can feel Hyungwon lean in a little, pressing his body closer to you as he thrusts his cock in and out of you. The way he flicks roughly against your sensitive nub has your moans increasing in frequency, his length mercilessly pushing through your folds so much that you press your face to the bed to tone down your voice.

“[Name]-ah.”

You can barely hum in response, legs feeling like it might give out any second. When you don’t respond properly, Hyungwon takes out the fingers inside you, and you lift your head up, whining a little.

“I want to see you.” He whispers into your ear, removing himself from you again, one hand resting on your ass. “Come on top of me.”

The tone of his voice is a little impatient but also stern, and it makes more heat pool at your wetness. You didn’t even realize you liked this kind of thing until today, and you nod, hurrying to get on top of the male who is breathing heavily and waiting for you. His erection is hard and you wrap your arms around it, guiding it inside you while Hyungwon has his eyes shut tight. You take a moment to sigh at how good it feels, and Hyungwon begins to thrust in and out of you again.

Your eyes shut tight, leaning on the bed for support. When you open your eyes, Hyungwon is watching the way your breasts go up and down with every thrust of his. Suddenly, you feel embarrassed, so you lean in to kiss his lips, closing your eyes and sighing when he wraps his arms around your body. He feels so warm, and he tightens his grip on you, his thrusts increasing in pressure and frequency.

You sigh out loud on his neck, kissing and sucking on his warm skin, and Hyungwon lets out a little groan when you clench on his length once again.

“I won’t last long if you keep doing that.” He mumbles into your ear. You give a deaf eat to what he said, because you liked feeling so filled up while he continues to fuck you and hold you so tightly. Despite what he said, you’re the one that doesn’t last long, the knots in your abdomen coming undone as you come while Hyungwon continues to pump his length inside you desperately. His thrusts become slower and sloppier, and from the loud groan he lets out while he sinks his nails into your ass, you can tell that he has reached his high as well. You lift your ass up and down to help him ride out his orgasm, until he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you to the side, still connected.

There is silence save for the two of you gasping and catching your breath. His grip on your body is still tight and you can feel his warm breath on your head as he rubs one hand over your bare back. The electricity you felt a little while ago dies down, and you finally lift your head up to face Hyungwon, who is watching you and smiles when you meet eyes.

“Wait a bit.” He says, kissing your cheek and then getting up. You feel a little hollow when he gets off from you, tying up and discarding the used condom into the wastebasket. When he climbs onto the bed, Hyungwon notices the way your juices have oozed out of your wetness, and you put your hands over your face in embarrassment as he continues to just stare at your womanhood without a word.

“Yah, stop staring!”

Hyungwon doesn’t say anything, but instead leans down, tongue licking off all of your wetness and making you gasp in surprise. You blink at him in surprise when he finishes off, then comes back to hold you in his arms. The way he holds you tightly and runs his fingers through your hair softly makes you think back to everything that just happened out of nowhere, something you had barely even thought of even though you two have been dating a while.

"I'm gonna have a hard time covering this up tomorrow, huh?" He says, rubbing a hand on the spot on his neck you sucked earlier, which has now turned into a little bruise. He then leans in and notices the hickeys he left on your neck and chest, and gives a content grin.

The way he’s smiling at you with nothing but love and affection makes you wrap your arms around his neck, pressing your face to his warm, bare chest.

“This is the first time I’ll ask, so please. Stay with me for tonight.”

You wonder if he will get upset at you for saying this, but Hyungwon only chuckles, grip on your body getting a little tighter and pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Mmhmm. I won’t leave you.”

“If you say things like that I’m not gonna be able to let you go even tomorrow.” You say, the two of you laughing together.

Even when words are not being exchanged, the warmth you two shared as you cuddled together under the duvet of your bed makes your heart feel safe and cozy. You almost drift off into sleep once again, but you can hear Hyungwon mumbling a little as he begins to doze off.

“I love you, [Name]-ah. I’ve always loved you.” He mumbles, and you smile, thinking back to how much you two cried in mutual pining.

Really, there really is no way to express that you love someone without saying it first.

And as Hyungwon continues to mumble as he falls asleep, he looks so beautiful and you fondly smile, feeling so glad you finally got the courage to tell him how you felt.

“I love you too, Hyungwon-ah.”

 - end

[atopearth]

Court of Darkness Part 4 - Toa Qelsum Route

Well, Toa seems pretty nice and reasonable to an extent. Keeping her in the air for so long was kinda slack but he did save her so better than nothing I guess lol. Didn't realise he was a Prefect though. Gotta love how anyone who isn't the LI of the route usually ends up scaring the heroine because they want her power to play with lol. It was kinda cute how she hid behind Toa though lol. I guess it's kinda interesting how Toa decided to take her in as the C-rank he needs to tutor for kingscraft or something, I mean it would be easier to deal with her than those fangirls.

Knight is much cuter than I thought. He's learning how to make tea from Roy just so Toa will be happy, that's so sweet. But I see, Toa's hatred for Guy and the Avari is really not only because their kingdoms were once at war but also because Guy's a genius and that made his family in Qelsum worried over their position and kingdom, so they always forced Toa to try and reach Guy's level in a sense, but no matter how hard Toa worked, he could never get their approval. Lmao when the heroine tried to open the music room door with "magic" and saying open sesame😂 she's so cute, I love her. I'm not sure if it was mentioned, but I didn't realise that the heroine's parents were already dead. It's nice that the flow of time is apparently the same as the human world so she knows it's their anniversary? I think Toa understanding the importance of honouring the dead and letting her choose flowers for it was nice. I guess it's nice that in the end, the heroine is the one who spurs Toa into fighting Guy (considering how insufferable Guy is to use ancient magic on the heroine every time to get her magic amplification). I guess considering how much power and potential the heroine provides to the people she touches, it is interesting that Toa doesn't care for it at all and strives to achieve things and defeat Guy through his own abilities. Awww, Toa "lost" but felt relieved finally getting to know how he could fare against Guy. But omgggg when the heroine took off her choker to channel her magical power to him so he could recover from using too much magic, and he held her hand firmly saying thank you with a smile🥰🥰🥰 that was so cuteee~ It's so adorable how excited the heroine is to go out to town with Toa. Aww I love it when the guy buys a present for the heroine, and Toa is especially thoughtful to buy some sort of mourning jewellery to help her remember her parents since her custom of having an altar with flowers isn't something practised here. I love how considerate and kind Toa is to buy sweets for Knight, and it's so cute how Knight is so happy about it.

My heart broke for the heroine... Not only was it heartbreaking to hear Toa tell his sister that he would take the heroine with him back to the kingdom because her magic is useful, but also when she honestly talked about it with him, and he ended up outing her feelings for him and making it seem like it's a win-win situation anyway because she likes him. Like, I understand it's difficult for Toa though, especially since he's been treated this way his whole life so there's no way he could just go against them all of a sudden, but it was still really sad to see the heroine have to endure the emotional pain and tell him that she is the one who chooses her own life and she won't follow him. She was honestly so brave because I don't know if I would be able to continue the conversation after all the stuff he said. I'm kinda shocked and surprised that this "shock" with Toa caused her to lose her magic though, like whoa. I'm really sad that the heroine agreed to have Toa erase her memories of him so that they can erase the "shock" and have her magic come back. But I can understand why Toa would insist on it. He obviously thinks and believes that his existence is causing torment to her and thinks that her having never met him would be the best way to solve this since he feels that he can't go against his kingdom and his duties, and thinks that she can live much more happily without him. Understandable but sad.

I am soo happy that Fenn tricked Toa into coming back to the academy lol. I think the fact that Toa didn't bother to even doubt Fenn and just came straight back was really sweet. I guess it couldn't be helped though, I'm sure that reading the heroine's sincere feelings through her letter would make him realise how silly he was to disregard her and his own feelings like that. I'm so happy Toa properly apologised to her, and omgg I didn't think that another reason he wanted to erase her memories was because he regretted hurting her like that. Omggg Toa being sad to part with her for the night is so adorable! And the kiss on the forehead! He's so honest and expressive about his feelings now, I'm dying at how cute he is🥺 I loved how they shared their feelings and physical affection and then got her magic back haha. I'm also glad that Guy had a part in helping Toa be able to return to the academy (since he impliedly acknowledged Toa’s ability publicly, and so Toa going back to his kingdom would make it seem like he actually isn’t a “coward” for running back to his kingdom). I'm weak to Toa's smiles🥺

Overall, I'm so happy that Toa's route did not disappoint! Honestly, even though his exterior seems rather cold, he's so much more kind and expressive than I thought. I literally thought he would be like Guy and them lol, but Toa's actions show what his true feelings are and he's so much easier to understand and relate to compared to the other guys, especially his reason for wanting to send the heroine back to her own world. I thought the drama was built up well and I liked how everyone had their own little part in helping Toa and the heroine be able to get together in the end. I also liked how Toa didn't like outright ditch his kingdom and be irresponsible etc, but instead baby steps into retrieving his freedom and himself as a person. Their relationship was really fun and sweet and he's my favourite guy for sure now hahaha. Unless Roy's route is super good...hahaha. (EDIT: It was not T_T)