#lol i was talking to my coworker and she was talking about how tired she was

[joelletwo]

woke up at six am was still late for my orientation getting lost and found by the extremely kind grace of another attendee seeing me confused as fuck in the parking lot kjsf sat thru five hours of c suite dick sucking and ice breakers w ppl i wont be working with. go home to my injured dog sweaty as hell eat five bites of potato salad. drive to my actual job do another hour and a half of corpo modules that dont apply to my position. go to get my chickenpox booster cant. go to report to my actual boss to do actual work for a few hours shes like lol just go home its late enough so i do. sweaty as fuck again. grocery shop bc i used all my food this weekend not cooking. cook dinner. eat dinner. time to walk my old ass dog. and then i have to go to BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and im working every day this week to pack in practice so this is just what its gonna be like every day. BYE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [for a week or two]

[shima-draws]

MANNNN my anxiety won’t QUIT. Send me some asks perhaps 🤲

[yumeka-sxf]

In addition to Yor's epiphany scene, this scene was the other one I was most looking forward to in season 2 - a scene that, in my opinion, is one of the most Twiyor-ish scenes in the series so far 💖

Why is it so significant? Because there was no reason for Twilight to put on any Loid Forger acting in that moment. He wasn't conversing with nor being scrutinized by anyone. So why would he give that soft smile followed by such affectionate, comforting words as "お疲れ様/otsukaresama"? (this can be translated in many ways, but generally it's something you say to thank someone for their hard work).

The answer is because it's something he truly felt...he understood the sacrifice Yor made for Anya's happiness and genuinely appreciated it (if only he knew the sacrifice she made on the larger scale, lol). While he's a bit perturbed at first since some onlookers were snickering at him, it didn't take long for him to soften and then graciously carry his queen and princess the girls back to the ship 😭

But Twilight overall was really soft in this episode and I loved it~ From his blush upon seeing Yor to the several times he gave that same soft smile when talking with/looking at her...I think Anya was right when she called him out on the ship about missing his wife 😅

I liked how the anime conveyed his shock when noticing her bruised face...what must have been his thought at that moment? 👀

The scenes of the family activities translated better in animated form in my opinion. While they were each only a single panel in the manga, they lasted a few seconds each in the anime, plus the addition of the insert song helped the with the comfy, wholesome vibe~ Also the part where Yor inadvertently chucks Anya across the ocean is still hilarious.

Loid's dorky skip at the beginning of the episode translated very well in animated form too 😅

The ending of this chapter in the manga always felt a bit rushed to me...it quickly jumps from the aforementioned scene of them returning to the ship, to suddenly being home, reuniting with Bond and Franky, having a meal together, then Twilight meeting Sylvia, all within a few panels. Even though I wish the anime added more than just some additional scenes of the ship leaving the island, I felt it flowed much better in the anime since, just like the family activities, each scene in the ending lasted a second or two instead of being a single illustration.

But I love how this chapter/episode ends, with Yor, Anya, and Bond napping while Anya draws about her family vacation. This seems to take place the next day or maybe later the same day they got home, so makes sense they'd still be tired from the trip!

By the way, the manga has this additional scene showing that Olka and company are safe. Weird that the anime didn't stick it in at some point.

Also, the anime team didn't have to go so hard with this episode's key visual but they did...and I love it 😍 Might actually be my favorite of the key visuals so far!

I was very happy to see the "surrounded by liars" panel finally animated! This is such a funny scene and a great way to fully wrap up the cruise arc.

I also burst out laughing at Yuri's locker 🤣

Damian is surprisingly laid back in this episode. I think the reason is because Anya's antics aren't directly involving him. He tends to go total tsundere only when she's actually talking to him, lol.

The new scene of Yor getting the keychains for her coworkers was a nice addition! Guess it's canon that Yor and Anya didn't sleep for the entire trip back, lol. Glad they got to spend family time on the ship too! (though I wish we could have seen Yor's reaction waking up in Loid's bottom bunk bed, haha. He must have brought her to his room since he wouldn't know where her room is. Unless she woke up before he even put her in a bed, in which case she would have been super embarrassed knowing he was carrying her around in public 😆)

Looks like next week the anime will be changing the order of things a bit and giving us the Becky home-wrecking and Fiona chapters (the latter of which seems to have some anime original content?) The Becky chapter is one of my favorite stand-alone chapters...I'm already dying of laugher thinking about it 😂

[leporellian]

Fuck it. Opera dashboard simulator

🐲 fafner Follow

hey whichever one of you left a tenor with a sword outside my lair can you come get him like i guess he's kind of fun to watch on the doorbell cam but he won't shut the fuck up

#i did not kill my brother and morph into a dragon to deal with this shit man

4 notes

🦉 troubadoursma Follow

I need to vent to you guys about something that happened to me sorry

(warning: child kidnapping/death, burning, etc)

Read more

🍭 rosinethegingerbreadwitch Follow

You know you can use roasted baby in a lot of really good recipes if you want to salvage the situation

🦉 troubadoursma Follow

What the fuck

111 notes

🦜 dervogel-fanger Follow

i think i'm getting desperate lol are any of my mutuals single and fem-identifying and down for a committed relationship? if your special interest is birds too that's a big plus. dm me if interested

0 notes

🌞 suntemple-official Follow

I'm gonna be real we've been kind of hatefollowing that vogelfanger acct for a while and we're losing it over his recent posts... 'are any of my mutuals single' DO YOU HEAR YOURSELFFF - Mod S

🌌 star-blazing-queen Follow

(unblocking you just to talk about this sorry) FOR REAL i get commissions from him so i have to follow him but he's so fucking annoying like just die already dude please

🌞 suntemple-official Follow

No offense I thought you were the worst user on this site but then I saw him and thought Actually no she's not that bad - Mod S

🦜 dervogel-fanger Follow

.

27 notes

🛡️ herodsoldier54 Follow

the one day i skip work and its the day our boss's stepdaughter went insane stripped for him and then made out with a decapitated head in front of everybody 😭😭😭😭

#my coworkers had to kill her and everything?????

98 notes

🌺 la-tosca Follow

RUNNING FROM THE COPS WITH MY HOT PAINTER BOYFRIEND AMA

🌺 la-tosca Follow

THEY FUCKING KILLED HIM

🌺 la-tosca Follow

GUESS I'M GONNA HAVE TO KILL SC*RPIA AGAIN IN THE AFTERLIFE LOL????? SEE YOU GUYS IN LIKE 15 MIN I THINK

#PRETTY SURE THEY HAVE WIFI THERE. I THINK #ALSO HOW PAINFUL IS JUMPING OFF A BUILDING. RESPOND FAST PLEASE

493 notes

🏵️ deverteallure Follow

The legal system here is so shit I'm gonna have to hire my fucking ex to be my lawyer. Fucking hate living in Seville man

#marcy speaks #also my ex really hates the defendant which i guess is really funny #for some reason they kind of look a little alike??? if you squint

6 notes

🦢 lohengrin Follow

kids these days dont know anything about online safety

🎇 wotanswilddaughter Follow

Bro isnt your url just your real name

🦢 lohengrin Follow

You didnt see that .

1,023 notes

💃 lahabanera Follow

Here can you guys fill this out for me stat

847 notes

🌊 sentaaaaa Follow

I want that ghost man carnally

48 notes

🐇 ilcatalogoilquesto Follow

So fucking tired of my terrible boss/roommate/crush maybe?/abuser hes being so fucking annoying rn. Wish i didnt have to deal with him

🐇 ilcatalogoilquesto Follow

Nvm

17 notes

[babygirlmurdock]

Unexpected Connection

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader

Summary: Your friend convinces you to go to a singles event only for you to meet Hell’s Kitchen infamous lawyer.

Word Count: 2.9k

Warnings: mild swearing, alcohol

a/n: heyyy lol so this is my First piece of fiction. i’m trying to get better at writing fiction and this actually came to me when something like this was actually brought up to me recently lol so i thought hey why not try to write something about it?

——————————————————————————

You’ve been single for quite some time now. Your last breakup was nasty, left your heart shredded; you weren’t too sure when you’d be truly ready to date again. Your friends have been helpful, pushing you to get out there and meet new people. Get your mind off your ex, y’know?

Swipe after swipe. Messages that are painfully one sided. Or men that just want to hook up or want something casual.

“Ooh, I just got this advertised to me on Instagram,” Jill says to you. Jill is a coworker turned friend. You perk up from your desk to see what she was talking about, “a meet and mingle this Saturday at the Refinary rooftop. We should definitely go!”

“Ugh, I just don’t know Jill. All men have done is just disappoint me and nothing has compared to Jam— ”,

“James. I know. But maybe the guy that is way better than James will be there. Your soulmate could be here and you would never know! C’mon it’ll be fun, I think. Plus meeting people in person is way better than on the apps,” she leans up against your desk. You worked as an editor at the New York Bulletin. It was an internship turned full time position after you graduated college. You dreamed of New York one day, and it still feels surreal that this is your reality.

You are sure your friends were tired of you sulking about James. It’s been well over 6 months and he’s probably already moved on while you’re stuck in this trench of dating.

“Okay. Fine. I hope there’s good drinks because Lord knows I’ll need that liquid confidence.” You scrubbed your face.

Jill squeals, “I’m so excited!! It starts at 7.”

——————————————————————————-

“Matt! It would be so fun, talking to beautiful women all night and who knows, maybe take one home!” Foggy hints to Matt about this meet and mingle.

“I’m really not in the cards to be dating right now, Foggy,” Matt says, shuffling through some papers. The mid-afternoon sun beamed through Matt’s office as Foggy stood in his doorway. Matt was trying to get through the last of this litigation before the end of the week and Foggy was not making this easier.

“This might be the opportunity that you meet someone who is actually normal! Not some psycho chick that almost got your ass expelled back in law school. That’s how long it’s been, Matt! Do you know how long ago law school was?” Matt lets out a small laugh at Foggy.

“Yes, Foggy. I was there, I know how long ago it was.”

He never understood why Foggy was so adamant on him meeting someone. Now that the firm is getting some business and he’s gone out more times than he can count as Daredevil, he just doesn’t have the time to commit.

“I’ll go only for an hour,” Matt sighs and Foggy lets out a cheer.

“You’re not gonna regret this, Murdock!”

————————————————————————

Saturday night rolls around. You and Jill are about to head to the singles event.

“I hope I meet someone rich,” Jill says, applying her lipstick. “I just don’t want to work again, y’know?”

“Tell me about it. I just hope nobody is too much of an asshole. I don’t know if I can take another person mansplaining what investing is and why I should do it,” You shouted from the bathroom, spraying some hairspray in your hair. You came out of the bathroom wearing jeans and a plain black t-shirt.

“Whoa girl, what are you wearing? You can’t wear that!” Jill said from your living room.

You eye yourself in the mirror, “what is so wrong with jeans and a t-shirt?”

Jill says your name sternly, “everything? You might meet the love of your life! Show some more!”

“You’re ridiculous. You’re lucky I’m going to this in the first place! Would it make you happier if I changed my top?” You say, taking off your shirt to dig for something she deems more appropriate.

“Atta girl, show the goodies,” Jill says, shimmying her chest. “Uber is downstairs, let’s get going.”

——————————————————————————

You arrive at the venue and make your way upstairs to the roof. It was decorated with greenery and twinkle lights. The place was lit just enough to make it romantic but not where you couldn’t see anyone. Not even 15 minutes into the event, you lose Jill in the crowd already talking to people. You make your way to the bar to order yourself a drink.

“Dirty martini, gin, please. Thanks,” you stand at the bar while you wait for your drink and hear a smooth voice next to you.

“Whiskey, neat, please. Thank you,” you peer over and your eyes meet a beautiful man wearing red glasses. You take a moment to read him a little bit. Gorgeous side profile. Your eyes make their way down to his hands, and meet with a cane. Blind?

“Dirty martini & a whiskey neat.”

“Thank you,” you both say in unison. “I suppose we should cheers?” The man says to you.

“Oh, uh sure, cheers,” You clink your glass against his and a smile breaks out on his face as the glass meets his lips. God damn, this guy looks like the next coming of Christ. He was so unreal looking. He had the jaw sculpted by God himself, decorated with just the right amount of stubble, and his lips. They were so pink and full. The thoughts of kissing him already danced in your head. The faint smell of his cologne twirled around in your nostrils.

“So let me guess,” you take a sip from your drink, “your friend basically dragged you here too against your will even though you told them you were over dating?”

“Wow,” his eyebrows perked up as he took another sip, “how did you guess?” he says, sarcastically.

“Well, considering you look like that,” your hand vaguely gestured to his body, “and women aren’t at your beck and call, I had to assume.”

“Look like what? Oh God, did I forget to put on my pants? You’d tell me that I’m pant less right?” He says frantically, trying to hide his laughter.

“Ha ha, very funny. But was I right?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“You’re not too far off. It’s hard to do modern dating when everything is on dating apps and eyesight helps that. Phones can only be so accessible. I’m Matt by the way, Matt Murdock.” He sticks his hand out for you to grab. You give him your name as you shake his hand. You notice some bruising on the knuckles and wonder what that could be about.

“Wait like, the lawyer?”

Matt sheepishly nodded in agreement, “that would be me.”

“Where were you when I told a cop to fuck off because I didn’t like how he was speaking to my friend?” You take a big swig of your martini hoping the alcohol would hit you sooner rather than later.

“My law partner must’ve missed the call from the woman brave enough to tell a cop to fuck off,” Matt smirks at you. Butterflies erupt inside you and your heart beat jumps.

————————————————————————

As the night goes on, and after a couple more drinks, conversation between you and Matt flows effortlessly. You two made your way over to a couch to sit and talk. The crowd ebbed and flowed throughout the night. People left, more people showed up, but it never got too crowded. It honestly felt like you and Matt were alone, like the world stood still.

“So you mean to tell me he took your furniture outside?” You laugh at the thought of his college roommate moving all of Matt’s furniture outside.

“Yeah, it was kind of rude of him to do that to a blind guy. He thought it was hilarious though,” Matt smiles at you.

“You guys seemed wild in law school. I bet campus police weren't too thrilled with your shenanigans,” you rest your chin on your hand as you lean a bit closer to Matt.

“Foggy actually got into some trouble with them because he was breaking the school's disability rules. Nothing too major, he just had to volunteer as a part of campus police to pay his dues.”

You laugh at Matt, and briefly look around and notice you and Matt seemed to be two of the other five couples that are still there.

“So, I have a question for you…” you trail off, debating on asking this question.

“No, I haven’t been blind my whole life,” Matt states.

“How did you know I was going to ask that?” your voice has an edge of surprise to it.

“It came in the pamphlet when I lost my vision. Don’t worry about it though, it doesn’t bother me when people ask,” Matt reassures you. “It’s been 20 years at this point.”

“Oh wow, so you had to adapt and relearn the world without your eyes. That’s insane, it must have been tough for you,” you rest your hand on Matt’s bicep. What business does he have to have this much of a defined arm?

“It took some adjusting but my other senses were…” Matt stops mid sentence before realizing what he was about to say.

“What? Like sensitive? I’m sure your other senses had to compensate now that your eyes were out of commission.”

“Yeah, you can say sensitive in a way,” Matt sighs. Silence falls between you both. You fiddle with your glass for a moment until he speaks up, “what do you say we get out of here?”

“Oh, um,” you look around in hopes of finding your friend because you’re still nervous about potentially going home with somebody new. No matter how gorgeous the man is. “I–“ you stammer.

“I don’t want to give the wrong intentions. What I mean is maybe go to another bar. There’s a place two blocks over that we can go to. If you’re up for it,” Matt gave you a small smile of reassurance.

You think for a moment, staring at his face while your heart feels like it’s going to leap out of your body. What the hell, why not? “Sure, I’d like that,” you smile and get up. You let Matt grab onto your forearm for guidance as you walk to the bar to close out. After he graciously also paid for your tab, you walked with him to the elevator.

“What’s this place called? How do I know you’re not going to murder me? You are still a stranger by the way,” you ramble on. Matt laughs at your nervousness.

“It’s called Josie’s. I’ve been going here since I was in law school. And if I were going to murder you, I would have done it already,” Matt leans into you playfully.

“Ah yeah that makes me feel so much better, thank you, Matt,” you joke.

—————————————————————————

The walk to Josie’s is mostly silent, but not awkward. You feel at ease around Matt. His energy is soothing, it feels like you’ve known him for ages. He asked about your upbringing, what brought you to New York. Your typical “getting to know someone” questions.

As you approach the bar, your nerves dissipate as you recognize this is a dive bar. “You seem less tense,” Matt said to you, his hand lightly placed on the pulse point of your wrist.

“Yeah, I love a good dive bar. It’s charming in a way,” you breathe out, leading the way into the bar. You find a seat at the bar for you and Matt to sit. You look around the bar, and notice the pool table in the back. There were old beer signs all over the walls. The lighting was dim and moody. Classic rock was playing over the speakers. Matt must’ve waved down a bartender while you were distracted because two beers are placed in front of you as you sat down next to him.

“I love how you assumed I liked beer,” you tease, taking a sip from your bottle.

“I can order something else if you’d like me to,” Matt's voice breaks a bit.

“I like beer, don’t worry,” you reassured him, “so what are the odds a blind man knows how to play pool?”

“I’ve played. I can’t promise I’ll be any good.”

Your drinks start to hit you more as you speak, “Do you want to make a bet?”

“Betting against a blind man? Low blow,” Matt sucks his teeth teasing you a bit. You giggle, “Fair point, Matthew. Fair point. C’mon, do you need guidance to the table?”

“No thank you, I know this place like it’s my own home,” Matt smiled at you as you both made your way over to the pool table.

You rack up the balls and Matt grabs some cues. “Do you want to break the triangle?” Matt asks.

“Sure, why not,” You bend over, lining up the cue ball with the tip of the triangle. Your heartbeat quickens as you feel Matt’s gaze upon you. You know, for someone who is blind, you sure can feel like his eyes were all over your body. The loud crack of the ball break snaps you out of your train of thought. “Do you, um, do you need help lining up the cue?”

“Actually yes, that’d be helpful.”

You make your way to Matt’s side, telling him solids were his and what balls were lined up with which ones. To your shock, he nails two solids into the sink holes. “I’ll be damned. Blind man is good at pool.”

Matt’s voice is low and husky when he says, “there’s a lot of secrets about me,” which gives you full body chills.

“Well, okay then, I—” you stammer trying to collect your tipsy self. You take your shot and, “God damn it, missed. You’re not hustling me, are you? You said you weren’t good!” you protest.

“Ehh, lucky shot, I guess,” Matt laughs, taking a swig of his beer.

The round of pool goes at a good pace, flirty innuendos fly off the walls. At this point, Matt’s jacket is off and the sleeves of his dress shirt are rolled up showing his forearms. Every passing hour, you feel more and more attracted to him. And you only hope he feels the same.

“Alright, 8 ball is up. Absolutely no fucking way I’m about to lose a game of pool to a guy who can’t see,” you said competitively.

“Well to be fair, you have been helping me line the cues up, you could’ve hustled me and lined up with your balls.” He suggests with a shrug.

“God damn it, you’re so right. Holy shit why didn’t I think of that?!” You line the cue up to the ball and take your shot...and miss. You let out a gasp as you just lost this game of pool.

“That didn’t sound like a good gasp,” Matt teased.

“You’d be correct. Good game, Matt.”

“Good game,” he said your name back to you.

You looked at your watch and realized it was almost midnight. “It’s getting late, I think we should head out. That sound okay to you?” you say, even though you secretly don’t want this night to end.

“Yeah, do you want me to walk you home?” Matt asks you, with a shy smile secretly hoping you’d say yes.

“That’d be really lovely, thank you. I’m just 5 blocks up actually.”

————————————————————————

“Alright, this is me,” you halt in front of your building’s entrance.

“Are you sure it’s not up one more block?” He flashes you a cheeky smile.

“Unfortunately, it is not. I had a really good time tonight, Matt,” you step closer to him, inches away from his body.

“I had a really nice time tonight, too,” Matt’s voice just above a whisper. God, that register in his voice practically made you fall to your knees.

You and Matt are still standing dangerously close to each other as both of your body’s heats mingled together, practically begging for some physical touch. “I should, uh, get upstairs. Goodnight, Matt.” As you are about to turn away, Matt pulls you in closer as your chests nearly touch. Lips hovering over one another as your breath intertwines with his. Your brain is barely forming coherent thoughts, until you whisper, “I think this is the part where you kiss me.”

“I was waiting for the words,” Matt’s hand snakes up to gently rest on your jawbone as he tilts your head up. His lips meet yours with the tenderness and sweetness that you crave so desperately. He pulls away and you both sigh. “That was—”

“Really nice. You’re an excellent kisser by the way,” you let your inside thoughts exist on the outside now. “That was meant to stay inside my brain, oh my god….” You buried your face in your hands as you pulled away from his embrace.

Matt laughs, “I appreciate the compliment, thank you.”

“Let’s do this again, next week? You owe me a rematch in pool.”

“Next week sounds fantastic. If the pool game went anything like it did tonight, it won’t be much of a rematch,” Matt banters with you. You gasp at his remark which makes him laugh. “I’ll call you sometime this week to set something up, okay?”

“Do you mind if I put my number in your phone? I figure that’d be easiest maybe,” You suggest.

“Oh yeah, that’d be great,” Matt said pulling out his phone. You grabbed it and put your name and number in there and handed it back to him.

“Okay,” you smile at him, “I’ll be anticipating your call.”

“Goodnight,” Matt whispers your name, dripping from his lips like honey. You kiss his cheek and head upstairs. As you close the door, you squeal in excitement.

Matt stood outside your building for a moment, listening to it shut to ensure you made it in okay. As he was about to step away, he heard you squeal to yourself in excitement, which made him laugh to himself.

[lemotmo]

This ask is all of us 😫 but also when you do put it in real job terms it's so embarrassing for him. Yikes.

Q. How did we get here? Seriously how did it get to this point? What the hell happened? I genuinely don't understand how he managed to start all of this. 🤣😭

A. I'm tired of talking about the cameo videos so I'm going to talk about them without talking about them, lol. I can't really figure out a good way to break it down so I'm going to use myself (as Lou in this scenario), my job (obviously 911 in this scenario), and my coworkers (the 911 cast) to try and break it down in a real world sense. I will use the character name that correlates instead of my actual coworkers names. So bear with me.

Let's say the firm I work for has a client and that client has a product (911) that they have made some modifications too (newly bi character). As a result my company needs to figure out a way to sell those modifications to the public. My company has a senior staff team (Bobby, Chimney, Hen, Buck and Eddie). My company also has a junior staff team (Ravi, Karen and Albert), I (Lou) am part of the junior staff team. Once in a while our boss (Tim) will assign a junior staff member to collaborate with, or help a member of the senior staff with working up a product launch or rebrand. In this case my boss has assigned me to work with Buck on this rebranding. Now normally Buck works with Eddie on his campaigns so Eddie is still a part of the team, I'm just basically Buck's assistant on this particular campaign. The pitch we come up with works pretty well and the client is happy with the overall result. I had nothing special to do with the success of the rebrand but I was a part of it. But a few of my coworkers liked the work I did and told me they would like to see more of my stuff. I'm not used to that particular kind of attention so I enjoy it for a bit. It's fun. No harm no foul. But at some point I decide that those coworkers are correct and I deserve a bigger role within my company. The problem is there are no openings on the senior staff. So I need my boss to believe that he should just create a position for me. So I get those coworkers to tell my boss that they want to see more of my work and he needs to give me a promotion that doesn't exist. My boss (again,Tim) tells them that there aren't any open positions that need to be filled, but thanks them for their enthusiasm for my work. But now I want that job that isn't really available so I tell those same coworkers to go above my boss's head and demand his boss create a position for me. His boss says the same thing, she did a great job but we don't need anyone. So that group of coworkers decide that they need to get Eddie moved to a different department so I can have his job. The problem with that is Eddie is very well liked by the staff as a whole. Our clients (the audience) like Eddie. They especially like his work with Buck. Buck is also not interested in working with anyone other than Eddie. So the idea doesn't go over well with most people. Besides the fact they all like Eddie there are other members of the junior staff (Karen and Ravi) who have been with the company longer and would be more deserving of a promotion, if one became available, than I am. But my friends and I disagree so my friends set out to try and turn the office against Eddie. They start bad mouthing him to our other clients. They spread rumors about him through the office. Some of them even start suggesting that maybe he and Buck are sleeping together and that's why Buck refuses to accept the idea of working with someone else. Things get so bad that the office splinters into two camps. The much larger pro Eddie camp, which includes Buck and the majority of our clients, and the much smaller pro me, (Lou) camp that is just louder and nastier. Forcing our boss to step in and condemn the smaller pro me camps behavior. Which now puts my boss, and his boss, in the position of deciding whether or not to keep me until my contract is up, so we can complete the original product plan, or go ahead and dismiss me from the company all together before completing the task, and just altering the original plan.

This is where we are.

This got insanely long, and maybe really confusing, I'm so sorry, but this is a real world version of what Lou basically did. And when you apply this tactic to a real life job scenario the level of absurdity is mind blowing. But, anon, this is how we got here. Essentially he started believing his own hype and opened a Pandora box he now cannot control and cannot close. So now we wait.

Thank you Nonny for dropping this in my inbox!

Now this was a great idea. If you put this in terms of jobs most people in fandom can understand and relate to, this kind of behaviour becomes even more unhinged.

Thank you for the time and effort to type this out Ali.

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[crushedsweets]

WWHAT WUD THE CREEPS DO 4 HALLOWEEN I MUST KNOW

anon... yes i like this. general disclaimer this is tailored to my au !! stuff under cut

toby likes it, thinks its fun and stuff. he's not the type to dress up beyond like, maybe a jacket and a mask or whatever, but he'll go and buy(steal) stupid ass halloween decorations from spirit or the dollar store. there r several mini skeletons sitting around his cabin. he treats it like elf on the shelf, but. . . skeletons... def will sit around and watch scary movies with a bag of halloween candy . totally carves pumpkins with whoever will do it with him

tim wouldnt really want to do much cuz he's just tired, but he probably would put out a small little pumpkin and bowl of candy outside his door. he's in an apartment so he doesnt really get trick or treaters. will prob buy some candy after halloween so its on sale

brians so annoying omfg(lovingly) he'd buy a fake arm, blood, and wig and stick it in his trunk so it looks like an arm is sticking out. yall know what im talking about. him and tim share an apartment so he'd prob try to actually put something simple around it, like some plastic pumpkins, but nothing really big. he is also a grown man with no kids, so he doesnt find himself going all out for these things

natalie. ok i recently made it where she's either already a tattoo artist, or learning to be a tattoo artist or whatever, but i could see her and some coworkers setting up the shop all halloweeny. she's so fucking tall that they'd just call her over for all the spider web stuff. she thinks its fun and she likes halloween a lot so it's cool. she'd get a huge kick out of doing halloween tattoos during october too. goes and hangs out with toby/nina for it

nina goes to parties . she HAS to get a whole new costume for every party. its super wasteful but she doesnt care all that matters is shes sexy. every year without fail she is a sexy gothic vampire for one of the parties. she works at hot topic, BUT she'd absofuckinglutely get a second job at spirit halloween for october. she's a creepy galll... def sets her apartment up super cutely, brings toby and nat over so they can carve pumpkins with her, tries to dress them up, etc. tons of halloween posts on her social medias too LOL shes so cute

jeff would prob also go to more like... weirder ( ?) parties with creeps and scary people roaming around just doing crazy shit. warehouse shit. prob finds someone to bring home and kill. he thinks its fun, its easier to just go about his days looking the way he does, he loves scaring the fucking shit out of people. doesnt decorate or wear costumes though, says its cringe LMFAO. hates how hyped nina is about it

jane and mary would totally decorate, but in a much more.. ? elegant ? way. like those tall skinny candles, swap out their doormat for something halloween themed, really nicely done pumpkins for some reason. jane would want to host a cute little halloween dinner for uni friends. probably just gets simple costumes, like she'd put on a witch hat and black dress and thats all, but its cute. takes sally (and ben, if sally asks him to come) trick or treating.

sally draws tons of drawings, loves disney halloween marathons, paints on pumpkins(doesnt like the smell of gutting them), etc. she'd decorate with jane cuz she lives w her. she loves it so much but she still gets scared of the animatronic things at stores and stuff LOL. begs ben to trick or treat w her. really embarrassing for ben

ben wouldnt do much besides like. he'd get worse w his internet trolling (scaring the fucking shit out of teens on the internet), start doing more actual hauntings bc nobody will believe his victims during october which means slender wont find out he's doing it. he would not want to go trick or treating..but he'd go with sally with a pillow case and he'd try to awkwardly stand further back but the ppl at the door would always b like 'aw dont be shy come here!' LOL

jack doesnt celebrate it, his family didnt really celebrate it much when he was human so he doesnt do it now. he does get kinda sad during holiday season though, cuz of obvious reasons, but halloween isnt the strongest Pain for him

liu is so fucking miserable theres no way. jk he'd set out like, some pumpkins and maybe get one of those lights that project ghosts onto his garage, but he wouldnt want to go all out or do anything to the inside of his house. jeff really liked halloween when he was younger so its kinda like ouch but he's getting overit. i guess. . .

kate doesnt..celebrate anything........ but when she does occasionally visit the cabin, maybe for food or a shower, and she sees toby decorated, she'd be happy to see it. she's kinda unsettling to be around, but she'd sit down and watch a movie with him in silence. then bring a massive bag of candy to the mine w her w/o telling toby. he just had to cope

ann and lulu dont do anything in the hospital. they dont really have any concept of time........... or the resources to decorate... and they dont get any trick or treaters... cuz theyre...stuck in an abandoned hospital in the woods . . . yeah..

ty for ask anoni like this one. very simple but very sweet

[fuck-customers]

how do i deal with a coworker badmouthing me to other coworkers and using the power of suggestion against me? she has no real problems to bring to the manager about me bc i don't do anything wrong, i'm a good worker, i know what i'm doing- been there 3 years and the manager likes what i'm doing. figured she doesn't like me bc i'm young (29, she's 72), and i'm not a small country town conservative like everyone else there. mostly it was the bossiness and the nitpicking but now she's started talking in ppl's ears. i;m trying my best to keep on doing what i'm doing and not let it bother me but the energy i get from my coworkers has shifted and it's making me feel unwelcome. and now she's started on the our regular customers too. i'm gonna have to start going out of my way to talk to this particular one bc i overheard her say to the old hag that she thinks i hate her????? no idea where that came from bc i don't treat her badly at all. figured it's bc i just don't talk to her a lot, but that's bc i have nothing to talk about, i'm often busy DOING my job, i'm not in the mood to talk most of the time bc my life is in the shitter and she talks to the other workers more anyway since they all know each other (i'm the newest employee). i'm so tired of this, working there could be so easy and simple if not for this petty bitchy BS. also i'm not the only one who dislikes her, most of the other ppl who work there come in on days that she ISN'T on lol, been thinking of switching days too but i don't wanna leave them too thin. i have enough problems and i just need her to piss off and leave me alone lol. actually i think me having problems is WHY she's targeting me, another lady who used to work there and left a lil while ago had personal problems too and she was the old hags punching bag. now that she's left, the old hag's focused her attention to me.

Posted by admin Rodney.

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

Is it bad that I crave your writting for Boo's childhood/backstory(including teen years, that shit gets crazy) just pack with layers upon layers upon layers upon layers upon layers of gut wrenching and sole crushing angst?

And Boo is telling Al and Seth all of this horrific tragic story and at the end of it they're just sitting there like:

"Sugerboo, wtaf?!"

lol don't mind me, just need to feel things tonight! And by that I mean pain! 🥲

-🪷 anon

Fucked life.

TW: Drug use, gambling, bad parents, domestic abuse (won't go into it), manipulation, shitty childhood and in all just wow. If I write anything wrong please tell me!

‼️This is just for the ask not giving Boo an actual background.‼️

"My childhood was of drugs, screaming, and fighting behind walls." Sipping the alcohol in the cup they got. Sugarboo leaned back on the chair they were in, nonchalant about what they just said. The boys were silent waiting for them to continue, not to disturb the comfortable flow they got themselves in.

"My dad wasn't and still ISN'T a good man. He would beat my mom, screaming at her why did she give birth to a defect of a kid. One that couldn't even shut the fuck up when he was mad." Hissing out Sugarboo grabbed the cup a bit tight. Seth felt his hands clench, and Alphonse looked ready to kill someone.

"But my mom wasn't a Saint either in this shit. She'd be like 'I took that beating for you and you can't even try to better yourself? What kind of child doesn't try for their mother?' She'd also say that me giving her money for her drug abuse would help her." Looking into the flames of the camp fire Sugarboo got lost in thought. Memories of needles and white powder on the table flashing through their mind.

"I had to lie to cps so, so many fucking times. Saying my mother was just tired because she worked two jobs, which she did. But got fired every time because she kept stealing food from the kitchen and taking alcohol from the gas station she worked at." Chugging the rest of their alcohol they reached over and grabbed a bottle of whatever. Cracking it open they didn't want to look at the stares of pity drilling on the back of their head.

"After my dad finally cracked and left my mom because of her drug addiction he took all the money we had. I was uumm, 16? Had a job at this Cafe in the city we lived in. The owner was this old man that knew what my mom did." Smiling solemnly SB thought back on that man. He was the father figure they needed desperately, he was a short Mexican man in his late 40's.

"Francisco, let me stay at the Cafe if I needed too. Made sure to squirrel away money for me so I can get away from my druggie mom....." Whispering SB wiped some tears that fell. It was hard talking about this shit, how their live was a mess and now they can't really talk about it. Not without the looks of pity.

"My mom found out when Francisco was talking to another coworker of mine. About how it was almost $200 dollars saved up for me. I've told him as soon as I graduated I was skipping to a different town. I wanted to be a baker, but my mom told me I needed a real job." Hissing out the last bit Sugarboo chugged the rest of the second cup. Starting their third as they slurred out more words.

"The bitch tried to hurt him! I never....got so fucking angry before. I grabbed a bottle and smashed it over her head. My mom didn't like that, so she, who was on a withdrawal of two days, began choking me." Moving their collar, flashing the scar they got from her nails. Alphonse remember asking about them before, Boo just shook their head and said 'For another time.' He felt like shit asking about it now.

"Francisco, worried grabbed a gun he had incase of a robber....shot her. There was witnesses and everything, so he wasn't charged. It was ruled as self defense. But I didn't have anywhere to go, as shitty as it was I had to be pit in a foster home." More tears pooled in their eyes as they left them fall. They wanted to stay with Francisco, but the Judge's words were final.

"I still worked there at the Cafe. But I wanted to stay with him! My Foster parents were nice I guess but they didn't get me. Mostly left me alone because I was older." There was older kids there but, SB didn't make friends with them. It was clear they didn't want another teenager with them.

"When it was the summer before or was it after? I turned 18....Francisco, he....he died." Sobbing out Seth and Alphonse got up. Each boy holding a hand as Sugarboo curled into themselves and cried.

"He left me everything. His grandchildren tried to get shit from me but they couldn't. They never tried and connect with him, even though he tried so desperately. I didn't budge or nothing I told them to suck my dick and kept the promise I had with Francisco. To run and live my life. How I wanted it, no shitty dad's, my druggie mom was dead and I was 18 with $24,000 dollars that Francisco left for me." Sitting up proud Sugarboo laughed as they remembered the old man telling them they better do good with he money. How he wanted them to be better than their parents, to use the hate they build up to make it useful.

"And here I am now! My own bakery in a small town that loves my goods. And two amazing men in my life! So yeah I'd think I'm living my life right now." Smiling at the two men who were still silent. Sugarboo got smiles back as all three hugged, this was nice.

"Boo, holy shit." Was the inky words they got as a response. Laughing at that Boo leaned to Alphonse and gave him a kiss. He always did have comedic timing.

"Sugar, I'm glad we got to meet you. And I'm glad you stayed strong through out all of this." The sad eyed man had tears saying those words. Sugarboo started frowning as they wiped his tears softly.

"Awe, don't cry hon..." Whispering as Seth was being held by them. Alphonse started crying too, wishing he meet then sooner to help them. But they can't change the past, it's already done.

"Wanna make stores and drink this night away?" Giving a cheeky grin Sugarboo held up their cup. Seth gave a watery laugh as he sat back up and nodded.

Alphonse cracked open another bottle of the disgusting sugary drink he had. And the three began drinking, telling happy memories they held close to their hearts. Stories made them stronger, helping them better understand where one of the trio was.

Sugarboo, for a moment paused looking at Seth and Alphonse argue over who won the wresting match when younger. And they started giggling like a maniac seeing their boys being so....them. Even after what they told the boys they still wanted them.

[glittter-vamp]

22 - Thong Song please and thank you 🙏 😂

Here you all go! I did my best to make it funny yet a bit scandalous lol

Based on the song Thong Song By Sisqo

Warnings: 18+ ONLY.MDNI! Sexual themes. Might or might not count as smut. Joe X Reader.

Word Count:1,829

"What do you think? These or these?" You ask your best friend as you hold up two different thongs. "Um...those aren't that cute." She says looking at your weird. "They're not for me." You say looking at the yellow thong. "Did I miss something and you dumped Joe for a girl?" She asks and you laugh. "These are for him." You say and she freezes. "Come again?" She asks. "He lost a bet." You say and she starts laughing. "On what!?" She asks. "We bet on some basketball game and his team lost." You say grabbing the yellow thong and leaving the red one you had also grabbed. "And what exactly is the punishment other than him having to wear that." she chuckles as you two head to the cashier in this lingerie store. "He has to wear it to a work party we're going to tomorrow night." Your smirk. "Oof, sucks to be him." She laughs. You two leave the mall and go your separate ways. You head over to your home that you shared with Joe, tired from the long shopping day you had with your best friend. 

Getting out of the car and grabbing all the shopping bags you make your way inside where you're instantly met with Joe fighting with someone. He was definitely playing one of his video games again. Deciding to leave him alone you make your way upstairs. You drop the bags on the bench that you had at the end of the bed and started putting stuff away. You bought way more than you had thought. "So you're just gonna come home and not say hello?" You hear Joe say as you hang up a new dress in the closet. "You seemed busy cussing someone out." You chuckle as he wraps his arms around you and gives you a kiss on your shoulder. "Ja'Marr made us lose the game again." He says making you laugh. "Nothing new I see." You say turning around and giving him a kiss. "Did you eat?" He asks. "We had lunch but I'm sure I'll get hungry again later." You say as Joe let's go of you and you walk back to the bags. "I'm surprised to see these many bags, I didn't get any notifications on my account the whole day." Joe says and you sigh. "How many times do I have to tell you that I can pay for things myself." You say grabbing another bag. "and that's cool but you do a lot of things for me, it'd make me feel better if you would treat yourself on my dime." Joe says. "You already pay for everything in this house Joseph, I can buy my own clothing and accessories." You chuckle shaking your head. 

"What's in here?" Joe smirks grabbing the bag from the lingerie boutique you had went earlier. "For you." You smirk. "Oh?" Joe smirks back but little did he know they were actually for him. He pulls out the yellow thong and he looks at them. "Not really your style but I'm sure they're going to look great on you." Joe says and you snort. "Someone I guess forgot about our bet the other day." You cross your arms smirking. Joe looks at you weird and then he freezes. "You were serious about that?" He asks. "Uh, yeah! Tomorrow is the perfect night to wear them too." You wink. "At your work party?! No way, nope." Absolutely not Joe says putting them back in the bag. "Hm... then I guess I can invite Sebastian instead." You shrug walking to put the skincare you had bought away in the bathroom. "Woah, Woah...Who said anything about taking your stupid coworker. Stop talking nonsense." Joe scoffs following you into the bathroom. "Then, keep your side of the bet!" You say and he sighs. "You're not going to let this go are you?" He asks. "Nope!" You smile at him through the mirror. 

*********************************

"Are you ready? We have to go in 5 minutes to get there on time" You say slipping your heels on. It was the evening of the party and you were about ready to go. "I'm actually not feeling too well, kind of have a headache maybe you should go without me." Joe says from the bathroom and you chuckle. "Nice try Burrow, let's go." You say grabbing your clutch. The bathroom door slowly opens and Joe comes out with an uncomfortable face making you smile. "You look nice...turn around." You say and he sighs in defeat turning around and you feast your eyes on his perfect ass in his slacks. "You should of done this a long time ago, you're has has never looked better." You smirk giving his plump cheeks a nice smack. "Do not do that!" Joe say turning around immediately. "Why not? You do it to me all the time. Hope you have an icepack in the freezer because that ass is going to be sore tonight." You wink at him before making your way out the bed room. "What does that even mean? I don't like the sound of that at all." Joe says following you. 

You two make your way to the car and you decide to drive. As you drove Joe kept moving around in his seat and adjusting himself. "Babe, you're kind of distracting me here." You say stopping at a red light. "Well sorry! But my balls are quite literally hanging out and this shit is riding up a little too much in the back." He says making you laugh. "Welcome to my world." You smile. "Can't believe I'm doing this." He says clearly irritated at the situation. "You lost fair and square, you'll be alright." You smirk and you could feel him giving you a dirty look beside you.

***********************

It was later in the night now and you were mingling around talking to some coworkers at this party. It was retirement party for one of our supervisor and you were actually having a good time. Joe on the other hand...not so much. He kept leaving to the bathroom to readjust himself and he now believes that my coworkers assume he has the runs. "I'll be back." You tell your coworkers heading over to Joe who was getting a drink at the bar. "Hey there sweet cheeks."  You say to Joe grabbing a butt cheek which made him jump. "Don't do that, you work with these people." Joe mutters giving you a look. "Chill out grandpa, no one is even around or paying attention." You laugh. "Are you ready to leave yet? Between this bet and your co-workers thinking I have to poop every 10 minutes because of it. I think I did my time" He says as the bartender comes over with a water bottle for him. "Hmm...I think you've suffered enough." You say. You say your goodbyes to everyone and make your way home. This time Joe drove home and as he was driving an idea pops into your head. You had music playing from your phone and decided to queue a certain song. As you two drove in silence and the song you chose started playing, a smile played on your face. Joe quickly looks over to you hearing the familiar violin playing. "Here we go." He rolls his eyes making you laugh.

"He had dumps like a truck, truck, truck. Thighs like, what, what, what. Baby move your butt, butt, butt." You sang. "Can you please not!" Joe says trying not to laugh but you continue to sing anyway. "Let me see that thong, baby! That Th-thong, thong, thong! I like when that beat go, I like when that booty go!" You sing as if your life depended on it. "That's enough!" A very red Joe says turning off the radio. "You're such a party pooper! Boooo!" You say rolling your eyes. "I'm never ever doing this again." Joe shakes his head as he pulls into your neighborhood. "Never say never Joseph." You chuckle. He pulls up to the house and parks in the garage and he makes a straight bee line the bedroom and you follow him. Joe makes an abrupt stop right before entering the room which causes you to bump into his hard back. "Where do you think you're going?" He asks and you laugh. "You think you're going to wear a thong and I'm not going to at least see it on you?" You scoff. "That wasn't part of the bet, so...that's exactly what's going to happen" He says turning around and going into the room. "Okay, that's fine." You say and he eyes you suspiciously as you start to take your jewelry off and change. "What's your game here?" Joe asks not convinced that you would just let it go like that. "No game but now that I think of it it's been how long since we've had sex due to our schedules?" You ask Joe and he looks at you with an unamused face. "3 weeks." He mutters. "I was reading that for athletes it does them pretty good to refrain from sex when partaking in their sport...the season is coming up maybe it will do some good if you just only focused on football until February." You shrug. 

"You're threatening no sex because I won't let you see me in this stupid thing?" Joe asks. "I'm doing no such thing, I'm just thinking of you and ways to help you this season." You say grabbing your pajamas and going to the bathroom to wash your face and change. As you changed the bathroom door opens and Joe enters. "Some privacy please?" You say but he ignores you and walks on over to you. "If...I let you see me in this stupid thing. Promise me you won't go to your friends about it." Joe says and you smile. "Promise." You bite your lip. Joe gives you a nervous look before he undoes his pants an drops them. He couldn't even look you in the eye. You smile seeing the yellow thin piece of fabric fail miserably at covering his bits. "Now turn..." You smirk and he sighs before turning around and seeing just how his two perfect round cheeks just swallow the thong. "This is the best day of my life." You giggle and Joe turns his head gives you an annoyed look. "Okay, that's eno- woah woah...the night is just getting started. Give me a minute and I'll meet you on the bed." You smirk inching closer to him. "There's no way this is turning you on right now." Joe says and your hand slowly makes its way to one of his cheeks making him turn red. "Just do what I say Burrow." You say giving him a sweet kiss before snapping the thong on his ass cheek like he's done to you plenty of times, which made him flinch and whimper. This was going to be so fun, you thought to yourself.

[gamerbearmira]

THUNDA

AU by @queenofthedisneyverse

I got bored and decided to take a break from drawing for asks and. Wrote this??? I mean it just came to my mind, and I remembered that comment thread from a few posts ago lol 💀💀

Anywayyyyy I've been thinking bout this au recently, so why not right for it

Let get it

---

Félix sat in the break room, having just come off the air. He had been there since 5 a.m., and he was tired and hungry. Of course, in his rush that morning, he had forgotten his lunch bag, and he cursed himself for that. He didn't like the station's food and he didn't feel like going out to any gas stations to buy any. Plus, his sister-in-law's food was way better than anything he could buy or make.

He tapped his foot, then perked up, remembering Pepa was at home. He quickly pulled out his phone, typing in the small keyboard, and waited impatiently for it to send. Service in the station sucked, unsurprisingly.

'Pepi can you bring me some food?'

Félix watched the screen for a while, growing more impatient before the next message popped up on the small screen.

'Be there in 15'

Félix breathed a sigh of relief, shoving his phone into his coat pocket. As he waited, his other coworkers, a few of the news anchors, and the other weatherwoman entered the room. He greeted them with a smile, and they joined him at the table.

"Hey Félix! Not surprised to see you here first," one of the news anchors, Cisco, said with a smile. He then looked confused. "Where's your food?"

Félix rolled his eyes. "Ay, I forgot it at home," he said, leaning forward. "But it's all good, my wife's gonna bring it to me. She'll be here in about 10 minutes."

One of the other news anchors suddenly spoke up. "You know Félix," he said in between bites. "We've never seen your wife. What's she like?"

Félix looked up in shock. "Really? I've never shown any pictures of her?" He asked, and the others shook their heads.

"You talk about her all the time, but you've never actually shown us what she looks like," the other weatherwoman, Emilia, said with a shrug as she took a bite of her food.

Félix furrowed his eyebrows. "B-But I have a picture of her on my desk?"

The others looked at each other and laughed, confusing Félix. "Bro, you have a picture of Thunderstorm from The Unwanted on your desk."

Félix blinked. "Yeah. That's my wife."

Cisco snorted, waving his mango around. "Yeah right. It's 2008 Félix, you think we're gonna fall for that?"

Félix pulled out his phone. "I'm being so serious, she's my wife," he flipped through his photo gallery, before finally coming up with some photos of him and Pepa. "Look!"

The group leaned forward, looking at the many photos of Félix next to Thunderstorm. A lot of them seemed to be in a concert, and there was only one where he was next to her taking a selfie. Emilia pursed her lips.

"No way," she said, leaning back in her chair. "You must've just had backstage access. And in that picture, she's not even looking at you!"

The others agreed, and Félix flipped his phone back around, flipping through some more photos. He finally got to the one he wanted, and showed them, smiling triumphantly. "Oh yeah? How do you explain this?" He said, pointing at the picture on the small phone. The others leaned forward once more, looking at the photo.

It was a wedding photo. Félix, obviously dressed in white attire, and Thunderstorm, or Pepa, in a long black dress and a sunflower bouquet in her hands while she stood next to Félix. The others stared at it, before murmuring amongst each other. One of them finally spoke up as Félix pulled his phone back. "No way. That's edited."

Félix pulled a deadpan face and was about to speak up when he got a message on his phone. With a smirk, he crossed his arms. "Well, speak of the devil. She's heading into the building right now."

The others rolled their eyes, seemingly tired of Félix antics. They denied his outrageous claims, not believing for one bit that Félix was married to Thunderstorm, one of the biggest singers of one of the biggest rock bands. But Félix just smiled and turned his head to the door as the click of heavy heels sounded through the hallway.

"Félix, I brought your lunch!" A voice called from the hall, and the others snapped their heads towards the doorway. And there she was. Thunderstorm, a.k.a Pepa Madrigal. She stood in the doorway, scanning the room with a nonchalant look. She had on dark clothes, a long dress with tall black heels. Her makeup was similar to her stage makeup; clearly, that was just how she dressed. Next to her, there was a small boy, no older than 3, who clung to her dress, and he perked up at the sight of Félix; the two shared an uncanny resemblance.

"Pepi!" Félix, casting an "I told you so" look to his coworkers, smiled, pecking Pepa on the lips. The other's jaws dropped, and Pepa checked the clock on the wall, while Félix picked up and smothered Antonio.

"All right mi amor, I have to head out," Pela said, handing Félix his bag of food. "I have rehearsal at the stadium, and then I'm gonna be rehearsing with the group after that."

"¡Adios!" With one last kiss, Pepa waved goodbye, leaving the break room with Antonio. Félix sat down, unpacking his food with a smirk. His coworkers stared at the door before turning to Félix.

"He's married...to Thunderstorm..." Cisco said.

"And he has a kid with her...?" Emilia stated next.

"Three. I have three kids, " Félix corrected, taking a bite of an arepa. The others just kept staring at him. "Do you believe me now?"

The other news anchor spoke up. "Wait, wait wait," he said, waving his hands. "But your last name is Castillo. Hers is Madrigal. So...what's up with that."

Félix shrugged. "I go by Castillo here at the station so none of their groupies try and come here. It was my last name before I got married. It's Madrigal now."

The others were shocked. They asked Félix a million questions, which he happily answered. One of them suddenly had a realization and spoke up. She pointed to one of the many band posters in the room. The one of the band.

"Wait, so if Thunderstorm--er, Pepa, is your wife," she said. "Isn't Chemical Chameleon her son? Does that mean he's your son too?"

"Yup. My second oldest. My oldest is in college right now," Félix said.

"What about Rose Thorn? A-And isn't she sisters with the Lonesome Butterfly?" Another asked.

"Yeah, they're my nieces. They have another sister, she's in college too," Félix stated nonchalantly.

"Oh my gosh. Does that mean that...Abuela Crimson...is..." Félix smiled again.

"Yup. My mother-in-law," Félix took another bite of his food as he watched the faces of his coworkers as they processed this new information. They slowly started piecing things together. And it was the most entertaining thing to him.

----

Bro was not kidding and they were FLABBERGASTED I mean it's insane. They saw all them pictures on Félix's desk and though that they weren't true 😭😭

It's all fun and games until the lead singer of one of the biggest emo rock bands walks in and hands your coworker his lunch bag

Félix's coworkers after seeing him kiss Pepa:

[crazy-lazy-elder-sims]

-the Tired accountant and the senior Designer pt2-

Hello again i decided to expand on my sims for the simblr office idea by @kashisun once again thank you for this and apologies if im a bit spammy im slightly excited lmao

Okay buckel up folks cause im about to take you on a journey TM lol

Introducing our office babes

Christian Sinclare:

33 years old but feels 50

Doesn't like coffee but drinks it to stay awake

His favorite color is Naomi's hair color👀

..... And sage green

Literally the only accountant in this company that you can talk to that wont bring up budget cuts in the first 5 mins

His favorite meme is the "keep calm and carry on" meme but people call him an old man if he brings it up. #leavesinclarealone2023

Always works late but only because he prefers to finish the financial reports on the same day he started them so he can sleep at night (anxiety gang hello👋)

So many coworkers from other depratments come down and talk to him about various Accounting things he has no idea why its not like he is the manger or head of the department ( its because he is handsome and all the peeps want a piece of him he's just too cluless to notice)

Obsessed with the presence of Mathematical algorithms in nature and everyday life

His favorite is how Bats can find the exact location of things using echo location and the math behind that

The golden Ratio is another obsession and he spends his days off in Museums observing painting that has them

Naomi Marroquin:

31 years old iced coffee addict

Her hair color was an accidental dark red home hair dye job that went wrong but she liked it so much she kept it for years

Her favorite color is red

Hates staying late and leaves the office at 5 o'clock sharp and no one can stop her (trust me they tried)

Says she doesn't care for all the office gossip and scandal but she is besties with the one HR employee from how much she goes down there to get the juicy gossip

Is the senior graphic designer but the graphic department head put her in charge of Budgeting and making exel sheets for the accounting department because she was the only one with "excel proficiency" on her resume

That was a lie

The first time she got assigned an excel sheet assignment she googled "how to learn excel fast" then added " for dummies" exactly 2 mins later

She oftten clashes withthe Accounting department on thier requestes to lower costs and cut out quality

Hates doing all the obove through email and tries to meet anyone from the accounting department but they all avoid her because they have no time for her 30 mins lectures about the importance of paper quality

Fun facts:

Naomi is taller than Christian 💓

Naomi used her personal email on accident for her resume which is called: Naomi.is.da.best.2012@simail.com but they hired her anyway because they desperately needed someone with excel skills

Naomi's corporate style is inspired by her mom who used to be a corporate goth but naomi is not one (infact some of her office Fashion staples were given to her by her mom)

Christian's second reason for staying late is that he hates going home to an empty quiet small Appartment and prefers the feel of the big spaces of the office

Christian refuses not not wear any sort of jacket during his workday but once the day is over and everyone leaves he takes of his jacket loosens up his tie and takes out his bun to feel more comfortable

Naomi once saw christian at a museum staring really hard at a painting then she saw that painting printed on a corset the next day it made her laugh so much she had to buy it for work

One day Naomi wore tights with bats on them (vintage 😉) when she arrived at work and "happened" to get in the elevator with Christian he instantly said "nice bats" but then panicked and went into how much he loves bats for 10 mins straight. Naomi instantly fell for that panicked rizz lol

Next day she came to the office with some nice bat earing but swears its not related to Christian and his love of bats(it is) and its NOT HER GIVING HIM SIGNS OMG GUYS DO YOU WANT ME TO GET WRITTEN UP TO HR( she totally was)

How they got close and began working together:

After a particularly tough day at work of having to stay late and trying to get through to the accounting department because they wont budge on buying the expensive colored ink for thier printers and how not doing that will compromise the color quality plus almost calling the accounting manger an uneducated potato,

she decided to pass by the empty (or so she thought) accounting department to let out some cuss words at a poor empty desk, she saw Sinclare sitting there tie loosened and all and decided to try again and convince him to not cut the important supplies from the budget

How she thought that conversation went:

How it actually went:

After he recovered from that he told her he will help her write better more convincing reports to present to the department and from then on they became friends (who are trying so hard and failing not to fall for each other)

Aaand Thats all for now folks if you read all that i wanna say thank you i love getting super inspired like this its so much fun! Tell me what you think of the babes here im So excited!

Thank you again to kashisun for this extremely fun idea❤️

[megamindslair]

A New Assignment

Moving my fics to @megamindsecretlair

Warnings: There's cursing. Bucky x Blackfem!reader.

Summary: One-shot. SHIELD is trying to rebuild its numbers and its operations, without the pesky Hydra stuff. You are an agent with a troubled past who has been taking any and all assignment you can get your hands on. However, Handler has a different assignment in mind this time.

Word Count: 1,654k

A/N: I just finished watching the Spy x Family anime and I loved the idea of a handler, no name given. I love spy stuff in general and I just wanted to write the a** line. LOL. Enjoy.

You were tired. The extra assignments were kicking your butt and the agency-wide shortage wasn’t helping. On more than one occasion, you’ve told Handler that they could simply recruit more people. Shocker you know, but with so many things Handler had to take care of, it was possible that a simple solution could fall through the cracks.

She was not amused. She launched into her favorite speech about the vetting process and how there was a thin line between idiots and spies. Even their best technology didn’t catch Hydra agents under their noses. It wasn’t enough to pluck some pimply fresh face from college anymore. And on and on her complaints went.

Until then, you dragged your carcass across Shield HQ. The agents were…promising. And that was putting it politely. Recruitment was slow and the focus was on other agencies like Sword, though you weren’t sure what was going on there after the whole Hayward thing. 

The new HQ was a lot more discreet than the previous Triskelion. It still lacked any actual decorating. The walls and floors were bland, the fluorescent lights were as bad as ever, and they used the same landscape and ocean prints from before. For all intents and purposes, it was business as usual. 

You crossed the building and took the elevator to the eleventh floor. Analysts milled around passing folders and talking to each other over their cubbies. They gave you a wide berth and whispered behind their hands. You kept your head high and your shoulders squared back. You could not control rumors and they had nothing to do with you. You, Handler, and the brass at Shield knew what happened. That was all that mattered.

You made your way to the back of the open floor plan and knocked on the door. Handler called your name and you entered, closing the door behind you.

Despite the drabness of the offices outside, Handler’s office was more stylish. The carpet and walls were still a dull grayish blue, but the paintings she chose were thought provoking. In one, two forms were contorted so it wasn’t clear if they were embracing or fighting. It was dark at the bottom of the painting as if they were emerging from a pool of inky blackness.

Handler’s chairs were plush and it was like sinking into a cloud. The desk was large without being obnoxious and it held her two computer screens, folders, mail, and small knick knacks like mini snow globes from various countries and shot glasses lined a shelf behind her. Two large windows let in enough light that the overhead lights weren’t truly necessary. In one corner, there was a flat screen TV depicting the latest news story. 

Handler leaned back in her seat as she tore her amber eyes away from the computer screens. She narrowed her eyes at you, a frown spreading across her small face. It only made you smirk as you settled more into the chair.

“We have a long assignment for you,” she said. 

“What?” 

“We appreciate your dedication to the short assignments and picking up the slack. As a reward, we’re placing you undercover at Bowers Innovation. There’s chatter that they’re working on a super soldier serum,” she said. She nodded towards a thick folder hanging off the edge of the desk.

You took it and skimmed through it. The folder held dossiers on the target, the lab, coworkers, etc. 

“We have other agents already in place to provide some cover.”

“Will people ever give up on super soldiers?” You asked, more to yourself. It seemed like even though aliens and gods visited Earth on a regular basis, people would never stop their endless hunt to be better and do better and live forever.

“As long as there are wars to win and soldiers to fight, people will never stop. We’re sending you in as a team. You’ll be partnered with another agent,” Handler said. 

“I work better alone, you know that. Why are you giving me this?” You asked. This was more suited to grunt work. You were not a babysitter. 

Handler lifted a perfectly arched eyebrow and pursed her lips. She blinked a few times and conveyed an entire conversation in that one look. 

You tilted your head and communicated right back. This was not the best use of your time or skills.

“You are uniquely qualified for this mission. Your exceptional ability to bullshit your way through anything is needed. You could sell ice to a penguin,” she said.

“Why, Handler. Flattery gets you nowhere,” you said, with a grin. 

Her jaw flexed but the blank expression she was known for remained in place. You didn’t really think you could get beneath her skin, but it was fun trying. 

“So, what, you want me to break into this lab, destroy the formula?” You asked.

“Emphasis on a long assignment. We need to know who hired him, where the serum is going, has it been tested, etc. It’s all in the folder.” Handler waved her hand as if she were bored with the whole conversation.

That made two of you. You didn’t like one thing about this assignment. Any attempt at contact would make you suspicious, whether your coworkers vouched for you or not. You were pretty good at bullshitting your way through things but with something like this serum, security was going to be tough. And what was your partner supposed to do?

“Fine. I’ll head to logistics to pick a partner,” you said.

“That’s already been arranged,” Handler said. If you didn’t know any better, you’d swear she smirked.

“What’s going on here? Who’s my partner?” 

Handler turned cat-like amber eyes towards you and said the last name you ever expected. “James Buchanan Barnes.”

Heat flashed over your skin. Anger boiled in your gut. “Are you kidding me? Bucky? He’s the opposite of low-key! I’m not doing it. Bucky is a pain in my natural Black-”

“Ass? You can be sometimes, but it’s part of your charm.” 

You whipped around in your seat and saw the devil himself standing in the doorway. How did he manage to open the door and drop in on the conversation without you noticing? 

You glared at him before looking at Handler. Her face hadn’t changed but you just knew that she was laughing her head off under that stoic exterior.

“Assign someone else,” you said.

Bucky shuffled in and closed the door behind him. He sat down and folded his hands in his lap. 

“Aw, but we got married. It’s a little late for cold feet,” he said. 

You kept your eyes trained on Handler while he kept his eyes focused on you. You schooled your features and dropped your tone. 

“Perhaps this assignment will work better with a more qualified agent. James’ face is too recognizable,” you said.

“That’s precisely why he’s qualified. Any person we’ve sent to get close to the scientist, Julius Fisher, was quickly shut down or the agents were found out. He’ll know that anyone would pay top dollar to replicate the super soldier serum. And if he’s not willing to sell, they’ll steal his research or kill him. He will definitely be suspicious of the two of you. But, he also won’t be able to resist a super soldier. He’ll come to you, trap or not.”

“He’ll know that James isn’t married. If he suddenly turns up married, that’s going to raise suspicions,” you said.

“Don’t you remember how small our wedding was? We invited our closest friends and the reception was lovely,” Bucky said.

“Lucky for you, due to the nature of James’ status, it would make sense to keep his personal life private. Including a wedding,” Handler said.

Son of a bitch. She was enjoying this. She already thought of every excuse you would come up with. 

Your chest felt too tight. You couldn’t breathe well enough to get a full breath. 

“Fine,” you said. There was no situation you could think of to get out of this. You could bullshit your way out of most things except where the Handler was involved. You simply had to make the most of the situation. Even if it had to do with Bucky.

Damn him. He smelled good. And he looked good. When he came in, he wore a t-shirt and jeans and his signature leather jacket. But he made that look like he stepped off of a runway. His hair was short and he already had stubble growing in. 

“Excellent. In your folder you’ll find all the details for your lovely, whirlwind romance and the details of your new apartment together,” Handler said.

You knew a dismissal when you heard one. You stood up and left the office, not bothering to address Bucky at all. Regardless, he caught up to you before you reached the opposite end of the office. He held the door as you left and kept time with you as you stalked down the hallway. 

“So when do you want to move in?” Bucky asked.

“Let’s get something straight. We’re only going to do the bare minimum when it comes to this. Outside the home, we’re the perfect couple. Inside of it, you stay in your room, I’ll stay in mine. We’ll stay out of each other’s way, got it?”

As you spoke, you didn’t realize you were poking him in the chest or advancing on him until he grabbed your outstretched hand and tugged you close. Your chest rubbed against his and the smell of him clouded your senses.

He looked down at you, making his eyes half closed. His long eyelashes nearly fanned his cheeks. He licked his lips slowly as he perused your face.

“Got it,” he whispered, with a smirk. 

“And no touching,” you said. You yanked your hand back and stalked off down the hallway, hating how he made you feel. You were so not okay with this.

[boxingcleverrr]

one thing I've tried to do the last few years is REALLY pick apart WHY certain, mainly harmless fun things don't jive with me, or even downright annoy me. Like, just shutting my mouth and not being a hater is good, no reason to yuck other people's yum and all.

But often times when you actually dig in and figure out the root of shit, it tends to annoy you a bit less. And in my case with many things they just become background static I ignore, as opposed to a glaring annoyance that stabs my brain every time I encounter it.

Lately both the Abbies on my dash reminded me how oh, so many harmless things that annoy me can be boiled down to infantilization.

Like, "No Talk Me I Angy" was super cute the first time I saw it, like yeah! A grumpy lil kitten the size of a pea would say it like that, how correct!

Then a few months later I saw it on a sticker on someone's travel mug, marking it as a thing that resonated with their personality, and internally I eye-rolled so hard I saw the back of my skull. Which is my same reaction to "choccy milk" and adults unironically saying "my tummy hurts D:" and yeah, SQUIDGE.

These are harmless fun things people enjoy and say. And I am an adult woman whose desk is covered in pre-FIM My Little Ponies.

But I was also infantilized a LOT growing up. I was bright for my age (now I know, also undiagnosed), buuuuut my intelligence and fact-retaining were kinda seen as a party trick, esp as I was the only person my age at family gatherings (big age gap between my nearest youngest and oldest siblings). My ideas and solutions were rarely taken seriously, and oh boy that lasted in my family uh, until I came back to Vermont as a 30 year old woman, lol.

My mother STILL has times of catching herself going "that can't be ri-..." before remembering hi, it's me, AND I'm almost 40 now. I'm not always right, but I usually am. Cause I got that brain that drives her crazy cause it remembers EVERYTHING.

My first serious conversation about boundaries with a coworker was with a woman in her 60s who baby-talked at EVERYONE (customers loved her, go figure). And while 90% of my coworkers were annoyed by it too, they just shrugged it off. But it seriously affected my mood, and ability to work really, as her desk was right next to mine.

So one day during lunch when she said something along the lines of "Awwww you're still a kid! You have lots of time to worry about ---!"

And I politely but firmly said, "I know you mean it kindly, but when you say things like 'I'm a kid' and so on, it kind of gives the impression that you don't see me as a peer, or mature enough for this job." And it was fine, she apologized, and shared HER point of view which was basically, she WISHES she were still a kid, cause she associated that time of her life with being carefree, and oh man.

Lots of annoyances in life can also be traced to a touch of envy: I envy people that find solace in not just childhood things (again, see: ponies and barbies all over my desk rn), but a childhood mindset. That going there is a way a lot of us are processing a world that is so, so impossibly tiring and expensive and yeah good god it'd feel nice to get tucked in and read Laura Ingalls before sleeps.

Buuuuut a childhood mindset for me was full of anxiety, lol. It was not being taken seriously, and wishing for challenges, or a portal to open up and swallow me and take me to my home planet where I'm a scholar-princess. So yeah naw, no thanks, there was lots of great fun stuff in my childhood, I had a loving home and all, but the anxiety and 'tism have been there too, making me the weird kid who knew stuff.

So yeah anyway. Knowing it and typing it out really DOES make me have less of an asshole reaction in the day to day. I might have a little envy for choccy milk people, but I do prefer being the 10 Obnoxious Facts About Chocolate You Didn't Ask For person.

[diagonal-queen]

I HAVE A REQ IDEA NOW THX TO UR LATEST POST <33

How abt platonic Hcs of being an older sibling (gn!reader) to Kyouka and Kenji?? I had to include Kenji too bcs I wanna give him a big hug and give kyouka so many headpats 🥹🥹

Feel free to take ur time! Ur health (both physically mentally and emotionally) comes first :DD

YAY HIIIIIIII <333333 thank you for the req my love 🌸 i appreciate your concern. stuff's been a little crazy in my house lately so i've been doing a lot more writing to try and distract myself lol, i got this one done lickety split <3 please also try your best to take care of yourself too!

Being their Older Sibling

♡ characters: Kyouka Izumi, Kenji Miyazawa, older sibling!gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: What would it be like to be the older sibling of Kyouka and Kenji?

♡ cw: We're assuming for my sake that reader works at the ADA alongside their younger sibling.

note: I love both Kyouka and Kenji sm they're my babies my children my sunshines. Also they'd make a cute couple when they get older ❤️ Apologies for errors and please enjoy!

Kyouka:

Being Kyouka's older sibling is both easy and difficult.

It's very easy to amuse her and buy her presents/gifts/food she likes, and talk to her about work

But it's hard to tell what she's feeling and to explain her sometimes odd behaviour to other people. She can be pretty difficult to communicate with when she's going through her teenage angst

You and Atsushi are naturally close because she also sees him as an older sibling. You two are her bodyguards (in theory. really, she's the one guarding the both of you (possible romance arc? 😳))

Kyouka despite being the younger sibling is fiercely overprotective of you. It's possible she'd even be willing to kill again to keep you safe, and she prefers to accompany you on missions instead of leave you alone

If you're feeling down this absolute angel will do whatever it takes to help you feel better. Pat your back, let you hug her plushies, cook you food, give you space etc.

Fukuzawa is as fond of you as he is of Kyouka lol

You two go out for lunch somewhere in the city every so often to discuss life and your coworkers (you get lots of tofu for her)

When you two have free time you like to do little activities together like origami or playing notepad games like hangman

You sometimes tell Atsushi stories about Kyouka from when she was very young (I...don't think she's a fan of this behaviour)

She leaves you little supportive notes at your desk sometimes <3

Kenji:

You could not have asked for a better younger brother than Kenji Miyazawa. He's just such a good kid!

Since you and he were both raised the same way in Ihatovo, you probably solve crimes in a similar way to him and then leave it to him to use his ability on enemies (Kunikida is tired)

Quite a lot of your salary goes towards food for Kenji. He eats a lot of food because his ability burns a lot of energy.

If you ever feel sad this kid is always there to put a smile on your face. He's just a bundle of sunshine and he's so empathetic, he always knows exactly what to say to fix your mood

You two go out around Yokohama a lot just because you can. You like to explore city things and observe city people together because a lot of things are still pretty new to the both of you

Kenji is rather blunt so he probably tells people random details about you that embarrass you on accident

He helps you carry all your stuff, obvi

You probably both have a lot of inside jokes, references or knowledge that's exclusive to your old village and whenever you bring them up to one another everybody around you is just like 'literally what are they talking about'

If you get a partner Kenji would really be like 'I'm glad you like my sibling! But if you did anything to hurt them I'd throttle you! :D' and you'd be like 'KENJI STOP' (he's actually pretty chill and trusts you, but he's definitely willing to throw hands if someone hurts you)

When you introduce people to him you have to give them a (discreet) warning not to make him mad because whoo boy

since i don't have any friends here, i tend to hang out in town with my brother. the amount of times we've been mistaken for a couple, oh my god. EVERYONE who sees us assumes we're dating and it's so uncomfortable lol. also fun fact i've basically written sibling characters for like, MOST of the characters. i even gave some of them names and backstories based on the characters' irl counterparts' literature lmao. i got way too into it especially with Fyodor's sister T-T

and of course thank you to @kxmikomrade for this adorable req!

[fuck-customers]

time to vent dump! <3 everyone at my job is so tired of one coworker of ours - he was "knighted" so he has a Sir suffix (something tells me that was something he got online and legit changed his name about it) and is an author of one book (we work at a gas station. he's very high and mighty about his book) i looked said book up and it's about a man and a woman who have almost the same name who date "so they can say their own names during sex" and the summary i read reeks of his personality, "i pretend to be so woke when really i'm a huge misogynist". such a big head on this guy's shoulders to start with.

he comes in to start his shift and immediately starts talking nonstop. mostly it is either complaints about customers, coworkers who aren't present, or music/media from his generation nobody cares about but insists are amazing and we should check them out. (really sticks out in my mind how he recommended that Lou Reed song about a boy being obsessed about his football coach. coworker seemed to think it was super progressive for the time bc it was talking about gay stuff when that's kinda overshadowed by the age difference element :/ )

he will talk over you, and it feels like if he's not talking about old media, he's talking about something negative (but of course he loves to complain about one of our female coworkers mentioning some tough things that are happening in her life right now. she's just SOOOO negative he says as he continues to shit talk everyone nonstop.)

at first i thought he'd be cool - when we first met he noticed my pronoun necklace and gendered me correctly like twice. (never did it again. we had a store meeting where my manager thought it'd be a great idea to single me out and tell everyone we need to work on getting my pronouns right. i don't think my manager meant ill will by it, he's trying to be supportive despite being ignorant of how everything trans works, but this douchey coworker tried to compare my gender neutral pronouns to his "sir" suffix and how "he didn't complain when people didn't call him sir" :/ that's.... that's really not comparable dude. everyone ignored him.)

today he was telling a story about a coworker and how badly she handled a situation with a deaf homeless person who sometimes comes to our store - when he finished, i tried to start telling a related story about how i passed notes back and forth with that deaf man a couple times and- that was as far as i got before he said "i don't give a flying fuck"

i've thought about it, and maybe he was saying, in context of the story, that he didn't give a fuck if the guy took some bananas while the coworker he was shit talking did care - but the way he delivered that line was so confusing, it really felt like he was telling me "i don't give a fuck about what you did or your story". in the moment i was stunned to silence, and tried later to rationalize it this way. i realized even if the former was the case, this coworker cared more about telling his story to shit talk our other coworker than he actually cared about the homeless person who was desperate for some food. it was more about opposing her than being generous or understanding with him. so when he tried to continue, i ignored him in favor of helping our other, newbie coworker, with his register.

i remember an old female coworker of mine told me he yelled at her to "never interrupt him when he's talking to a woman," which reeks of superiority and desperation lol

all in all he's just an unfriendly, disrespectful, self centered, unpleasant person who thinks his shit smells like roses. i feel bad whenever i clock out and leave one of my female coworkers with him for closing shift, although luckily i think he's bored by her and mostly leaves her alone unless he wants to bitch about something or talk about old media. he's always trying to crack jokes and they all are either bordering on the offensive or are just straight up not funny or both. i'm really sick of him and i can tell just about everyone else is too. i'm so so glad i only see him in passing, as he's a closer and i'm an opener, but the few minutes i have with him as i'm clocking out and gathering my things are just 8') a few minutes too many.