#literally woke up at 4 am and thought about him

[rireraa]

midorima's kisses

[all characters aged up!]

midorima's kisses would always be gentle

he isn't someone who is touchy all day, but that doesn't mean he holds back with kisses. there are his soft good night kisses and good morning kisses on forehead and nose.

more tensional ones in the shower after you had suddenly appeared next to him. And sometimes he joins you, saying you take too long, but he just wants to wash your hair and your neck, actually your whole body (he would never admit it).

his first kiss, oh lord, our boy wouldn't know what to do. where should he put his hands? he wanted them everywhere, on your cheeks and neck and waist, but didn't know how you would react.

→ all flushed and cheeks red he would need to tear himself back before he does something unintentionally, reducing the space between you, putting your hair back to see all of your face, tasting you a second time.

normally he avoids make out sessions just because his feelings are like a rollercoaster. but with a little bit of pushing and maybe some alcohol you can't stop him anymore.

→ here he doesn't need to think about every decision, placement of his hands and if he can use his tongue, he just does and reads your reaction afterwards.

→ man just wants more and more once he has started and can't help but lift you up and carry you to the bedroom.

→ during breaks between your kisses he places his head against yours and looks deeply into your eyes, trying to catch his breath before reuniting your lips again

[angelyuji]

yandere stanley and stanford pines somno thoughts :)

18+!!!

tw // somnophilia, noncon, dubcon, drugging, pls lmk if i missed any tags

sorry there’s a read more link, this one is a little intense so… mind the tws and tags pls🥰🥰

stan is not sneaky or quiet going into your room. he thinks he’s being quiet, but he’s not. after a couple times, he stops bothering. like it clicked for him that it doesn’t matter if you do wake up cuz either way you’re in his home and there’s no way out. no amount of screaming will save you either, like the shack is out in the woods.

the first time wasn’t on purpose, it was a heatwave and stan woke up around 2 am not being able to go back go sleep in the heat. sooo he goes to ur room to check on you, yk to see if you’ve fallen asleep yet or if ur awake like him. he’d go into your room and see the 4 different standing fans he bought for you turned on, and also see that you’re only sleeping in your underwear. the heat was killing you, so obviously you had to strip. immediately stan’s next to your bed, hand slowly messaging your naked chest. you moan a little in your sleep and stan takes that as a sign that you’re literally begging for him. like moaning??? in your sleep??? ok SLUT. same thing next evening, except stan goes farther. and like he’s been out of the game for so long yk so he’s just curious. and like it’s not his fault you were tempting him, he’s an old man. he takes a couple risks: kissing you, pushing a couple fingers into your mouth or hole to see how much of him you could take. by day 3, he’ll see that your body is being conditioned to respond to his touch and he’s actually gonna lose it.

your eyes flutter open, a moan falling from your lips, as you feel something press against your heat. “hey there, dollface.” stan grins at you and you jolt awake, trying to move away.

“stan, don’t! get-”

stan grabs your waist and pulls you back, cutting you off, “no point in trying to run, baby.” he flips you over, pushing your face into the pillow. he gets to his knees and pushes into you, stopping to feel the melting heat.

“s-stan p-please” you moan, muffled by the pillow.

“please what, sugar.” stan grins as you try to move your hips. he grabs a fistful of your hair, making you arch to look at him.

“please, please keep going”

ford is the sorta the opposite of stan like he couldve been doing this to you for months and you wouldve never known. like he definitely crushes up some sleeping pills into your food when you’re not looking. he knows what he’s doing is wrong and knows he should stop, but he can’t help it, you’re just so beautiful.

i feel like first time it happened, it was probably when you fell asleep in his lab. you had stayed with him to do some research and when you fell asleep, he decided to carry you to bed. the warmth of your body against his was enough to get him flustered, but when he laid you down, he took the opportunity to press a kiss to your mouth. and dude… he was immediately devastatingly horny like one kiss almost took him out. he definitely booked it out of your room out of embarrassment (even though you weren’t conscious to see) after this, he didn’t make eye contact with you or talk to you for a couple days. you end up confronting him about it and instead of telling you his feelings, he decided that he should just drug you to keep using you without having to vulnerable.

i feel like every time he does this, even if you’re not awake, he’s apologizing to you and making sure that you cum too. like he feels sooo bad for doing this to you, but like the guilts not gonna stop him. the only reason you ever realized is cuz he fucked up on the pills and you woke up to him pounding into you like a rabbit.

“f-ford, get off me.” you could feel every inch of him as he held you close. you try to push him off you, but instead he folds you in half, legs hooking his shoulders.

in this position, you could hardly think or breathe, he went deep and hard into you. as he gets quicker, he starts to mumble into your ear, “i can’t stop, i-i’m sorry, i’m s-so sorry.” he bites into your shoulder and you moan. “you just feel so good.”

for both ford and stan, once you wake up to them using you and you end up not telling anyone what happened, they’ll take that as a green light to keep doing this to you. and then it evolves from at night while you’re sleeping to the afternoon in a public mall bathroom.

(i kinda want to write about that now… but also… tutor!ford x reader… stan x babysitter!reader… im thinking thoughts…)

[dollerines]

How I entered the void so easily after 1 year of trying

So after 1 year and half of trying to enter I finally did it and I am so mad because it REALLY IS SOOOOO EASY and tbh if in this post you are looking for any sort of validation or info you smart ass already know then please REMEMBER THIS : entering the void is extremely easy. You just have to do it in a way that resonates with you.

Personally for me since I had adhd I couldn’t just stay still and affirm for 1 or even a few for 10 mins. Not just because I was lazy but because just repeating “I am in the void” for so long gets me tired and makes me think of the void more and you actually don’t want to think too deeep about it. I couldn’t wake 3 hours prior and then affirm or even have the patience to do the psych k, yes I was extremely lazy back then and unpresistent but one thing that helped me even backed then was THE ALPHA STATE MEDITATION !

You just have to find what works for you, find a method technique whatever you want to do that doesn’t seem like a chore. So In a post back then I found on @gorgeouslypink acc talking about doing the alpha sate meditation and I tried it back then and I felt really relaxed and it was a good feeling but like I said back then I was realllly lazy so after a few mins I stopped. Then many months later passed and I was still looking for anything and everything on the void. Then just like two days ago I came across another post which was pretty simple and the technique I used was called the DISTRACTED TECHNIQUE.

All there was to do was the usual you get into a comfortable position and then she said to use the alpha state meditation and used the one gorgeouslypink recommended. So I used it and then what she tell you to do is to just think of anything else just get distracted basically and this WAS SO GOOD 4 ME because back then I had adhd so it made it harder to concentrate on just affirming and so yeah I just thought of random things and then at some point where I was completely distracted I felt my body like lift up 😭 if that makes sense I just can’t clearly describe it. It felt really like a shift and I was like ‘panicking’ in a way but I wasn’t actually panicking I just kinda became aware what was going and then I got scared a little but I just relaxed shortly after. Also my fan that was making like a loud noises was coming in an out and then I only hear it in one ear and then I didn’t hear anything and I just stayed there wondering if I reached the void and i actually was!!! I didn’t feel my body it felt like I had no body at all and it was pitch black just like how I imagined the void to be. For a few minutes I just stayed there feeling the most surreal peace I have ever felt. I needed that peace fr 💀.

So then I affirmed for my desires all I said was “I have all my desired results from my subliminal playlist.” Then just to be extra sure I just said “I have everything I want.”

At that point I got really excited and then I wiggled my toes to get out because I was too dam happy I needed to see all my shit the moment I wake up and then I slowly started getting out and when I tell you I cried for like a good dam minute when I woke up and saw how DIFFERENT. My room looked. I literally screamed onto my pillow. I was so dam scare and yet excited to see how I looked.

WHAT I MANIFESTED :

Desired body and face

Having silky straight tailbone length hair cuz mines was originally curly

And everything in my sub playlist

My desired boyfriend and guys I made him be like Gojo Satoru ( because we are all delusional over him 🤪) and let me tell you he is so tall, handsome, sexy and a literal god. He is so silly too 🩷

Moving countries I now live in ny

Never actually meeting my ex and all the people in my old school forget me and have actually never even met me. Like if u asked them about me they have never heard or known me before

Extremely rich rich like hella bands

Got rid of my anxiety and mental health issue

Plus +++

NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS.

Even if the circumstances seem to be eating you alive don’t mind that too much. Even if all seems hopeless don’t give up because you already know nothing can decide or be unless you give it power to be. So stop being goofy and take responsibility and DONT STRESS!! You don’t see God stressing do you. All he has to do is blink and whatever he wants to happen, happens. Plus a lot of confidence came from non dualism that I owe a huge thanks to @trynafindbarbiee she really said it like it is !!

YOU GOT THIS ML 🩷🩷🩷🩷

[cressidagrey]

Stars all aligned - Chapter 4

Summary:

If there was one thing that both Azriel and Zahra Archeron had in common, it was that they were both very good at blending into the background.

They just never thought that their family were going to be the ones who never saw them at all.

Warning:

THIS IS BAD! I have updated the tags on AO3, but I'll add it on here too:

Bashing of like...every IC member? Especially the Archeron Sisters, discussion of chronic pain, discussion of Infertility, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Underage Prostitution, Underage Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please, take care of your own mental health and don't read it.

(Lovely dividers thanks to @sweetmelodygraphics)

Master. Master, you need to wake up! The shadows were the ones that woke him. Azriel blinked open his eyes… and a moment later the thick cloying scent of blood hit him.

It woke him up immediately. He shot upright on the couch, shadows rushing around him. The scent of blood came from Zahra’s room. 

Nobody else was in the cottage. He knew that. The shadows would have alerted him if there was. 

Which meant that…

He was up before he could think twice about it, hurrying to the door of her room, heart beating furiously, already dreading what might have happened. What she might have done to herself.  “Zahra?” Azriel asked loudly. “Zahra, are you alright?”

A choked gasp, a pitiful moan…all he needed to hear. “I am coming in.“ he warned her. Azriel pushed open the door…and he froze at the threshold of the doorway, staring at the sight awaiting him. 

This couldn’t all be her blood. 

Right? 

Zahra lay in the middle of the bed, curled on her side. Her body shook through painful shivers and her skin had already taken on a worrying grey colour, near lifeless. 

And the bed…the sheets…they were a mess of crimson. 

Blood had soaked through the sheets, staining the mattress…It was…it was horrific.

“Go away.” She whispered, her voice weak. “Please.”

Yeah. That was so not happening. 

His heart was pounding, his chest nearly painfully tight as his eyes focused on her. On Zahra’s shaking body, on her pale face. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” Azriel said softly, his voice strained. Gods. What had she done to herself?  “Where are you hurt? What did you do?” He demanded, coming closer, reaching out to touch her arms. Her throat and wrists were unblemished, if one ignored the cold sweat…just as she whimpered again, nearly violently flinching, doubling over.

Between one breath and the next…suddenly it snapped.

The golden bond unfurled to the smell of his mate’s blood, to the sound of her pain.

“I…” she tried to speak, but her words became caught in her throat, choked off by another gasp of pain. By the Mother…

Azriel could feel the bond between them. It seemed to hum in his very bones, demanding that he fix this, that he find the cause of her pain and make it stop.

He knelt on the bed, his knees sinking into the pool of blood, hands hovering above her.

“Where does it hurt?” He asked her desperately.

She just whimpered, her whole body shivering. “Can’t you just….leave me alone?” She asked brokenly, her voice cracking. “Please. It’s just…”

Azriel ignored her, carefully shifting her body until she was lying on her back. But in doing so, he accidentally brushed against her stomach, and all he could think was that he had literally never heard a scream so painful.

Her nightgown was drenched with sweat and blood…dark red right by…

„Have you had your cycle yet as a fae?“ Azriel asked sharply. But that shouldn’t…this was too much blood for that…wasn’t it?

Her eyes were scrunched shut, her face a twisted rictus of agony. She shook her head at his question, teeth clenching. “No…” she said through clenched teeth, her voice high with pain. “No, I haven’t gotten one..”

Which made no sense either because she had…because she had been a fae for nearly three years at this point. Zahra should have gone through multiple cycles by now. 

And while fae cycles were vicious, they weren’t…

They didn’t involve this much blood. Usually. 

Another whimper of pain, another tremble of that bond in his chest…and Azriel was done. 

Madja. He needed Madja.

“I’ll get Madja,” he told Zahra tightly, hands gently cupping her face. “I just need to go get her, and then I’ll be right back,” he promised her desperately, just as another choked-off moan came from her. 

The shadows came flowing out of the corners of the room, pressing against Zahra's face. Go, Master! they demanded.

Azriel’s throat closed up. He hated the thought of leaving her, even for a moment. But he gave a sharp, resolute nod. “Okay..okay, I will be right back.”

He gave her one last look, her pale face and dark hair soaked with sweat and blood, and then he was gone. 

“Madja!! Madja!” He bellowed. He wasn’t normally one to be panicked, he was an Illyrian trained from birth to be calm under stress, to keep his head. But this…Gods, this had his heart in his throat and his mind racing.

This was his mate. 

He had waited half a millennia for her and she had been right in front of his nose for three years and he hadn’t fucking seen it. 

If he had seen it earlier, maybe then it would have never gotten this bad, maybe then it wouldn’t have…

He was quite sure that he gave Madja half a heart attack, but quite frankly, Madja was used to worse from him and his family. 

And so, Madja only took one look at his panicked, wild expression and her own went serious. “What happened?” She asked as she rose from her chair.

“It’s Zahra,” Azriel said, his voice thick. He swallowed, trying to get a grip. “She’s…bleeding. So much…blood. It’s everywhere, it’s all over her bed and clothes and…gods, I don’t know what happened, but I need you to come, now.”

Madja’s eyes widened, her hands going to the satchel at the table. “Take me to her.” She said simply, shoving a few jars into her bag. 

Zahra was where he had left her, shadows worriedly swirling around her. And the sigh that greeted them made even Madja’s breath hitch. 

“Zahra, can you hear me?” Madja asked immediately. “I am going to help you, alright?”

Zahra’s eyes flickered but didn’t open. Her breaths were uneven and pained, her face twisted. “Y-yeah…” she panted, voice quavering.

Azriel knelt by the bed, one hand coming down to hers and lacing their fingers together. He could feel the damp and icy cold skin against his…her heartbeat skittering underneath her skin…Azriel was practically shaking himself with how worried he was, his whole body trembling with fear.

“You’re going to be just fine,” he murmured softly. “Madja is here, she will figure out what’s wrong.”

Zahra groaned, her fingers giving a weak twitch in his before gripping onto his hand like a lifeline.

“Hurts..” she whimpered, her voice cracking.

“I know,“ Madja said soothingly. “I’ll need to lift your nightgown, alright? Just to see where we are at.“

Zahra gave a low whine, her eyes scrunching up tighter, but she made no protest or move to stop the healer. Azriel didn’t know if she did that because she trusted Madja or because she was far too far gone to even care. Madja carefully peeled back the blood-soaked fabric, carefully lifting it up over her stomach.

Azriel kept his eyes on Zahra's face, pressing a kiss against the back of her hand.  “Squeeze as tight as you need to,” he told her softly. 

“What if I hurt you?” she forced out, but he just shook his head. 

“You won’t,” Azriel promised her simply. And even if she did…he wouldn’t care. He would have given everything in that moment to make sure that she was comforted even a tiny little bit. 

Her face was drenched in sweat, her body quivering, and she looked far too young, too fragile at that moment. 

He forgot sometimes, how young she really was. Not even a century yet. Not even…

But she still squeezed his hand tighter. Her eyes clenched closed, her breaths laboured and quick. “Hurts…it hurts so badly…” she whimpered brokenly.

Whatever Madja was doing to her…Zahra’s breathing was becoming panicked and even more pained, her whole body shaking. 

Azriel was having to restrain the urge to pull her into his arms, to tug her up against his chest and try to soothe her. To drag her away from Madja, who he knew was only trying to help and instead comfort his mate. 

So instead, he pressed another kiss to her sweat-slick skin even as she cried out sharply. The sound made him flinch. 

“Gods,” Madja cursed sharply and Azriel’s head snapped towards her. She was looking far more upset than Azriel had ever seen her. 

“What is it? “ he asked shakily, Zahra whimpering and he turned back towards her, unable to tear his gaze away from the anguished, pain-filled face of his mate. “What’s happening?

“You should have been brought to me immediately, Zahra” Madja said softly. “I could have lessened the pain, dear.”

Zahra didn’t say a word, biting her lips, her face still pulled up into a pain-filled grimace. 

“How often?” Madja asked, her voice softening.  

Zahra’s breaths were hitching, coming in shallow pants as her trembling increased. She shook her head softly, her words coming out between gasps. “Often,” she’d whimpered.

Zahra gave another moan, and her hand clenched even harder around Azriel’s. Every one of her shudders and flinches was like a knife straight into his heart.

He had no idea what they were talking about, but it couldn’t be good, he knew that much.��

“How old were you the first time?” Madja asked gently.

“15,” Zahra whispered, wetting her lips. Every single word seemed to be forced out of her chest.  “I was 15.“

15…so young. Gods, so damn young.

Madja’s face was grim, “And the last?” The healer questioned.

“It went on for 6 years,” Zahra whispered. “Until 4 years ago.”

Madja nodded tightly. “You were still human,” Madja said softly. “The scarring is…extensive. Humans heal slower don’t they?”

“Yes,” Zahra whispered.

Azriel’s heart was hammering in his chest, his mind racing to try to catch up to the conversation that was happening. He felt so goddamn useless. There was something wrong, so wrong, and he couldn’t do a thing to try and help. The feeling of helplessness was killing him.

And this…this sounded like they were implying something so awful that he daren’t voice it. 

“What’s wrong with her?” He demanded. “What do you mean by scarring?”

Madja’s hands were moving across the skin of Zahra’s abdomen, pressing down gently, something that resulted in Zahra’s whole body flinching “There is extensive scarring in her reproductive system.” The healer told him bluntly. “Like she has been injured for an extended period. Over and Over.”

Zahra let out a shuddering gasp, her head tilting to press into the pillows and away from the healer’s hands.

“Cauldron, sunshine, what happened to you?” Azriel whispered.

He hadn’t actually expected an answer. He got one nonetheless.

“I did what I had to. I always did what I had to,” Zahra whispered, green eyes begging him to understand. “We had no money and Feyre was sick and… Was I supposed to let my little sister die?” Azriel went utterly still at her words

She had…she had done something to her own body to save her sister. Something bad enough to give her scars on her internal organs. What the hell had she ever done to cause this much damage?

“What did you do?” He forced out.

Her breath was shaky. “I gave the only thing that was mine to give up. The only thing that…the only thing that that apothecary would want,” she recounted with a shudder. Azriel’s blood went cold, freezing in his veins.

He didn’t…he couldn’t possibly mean…

“He raped you.” He whispered.

He wished she would disagree…would tell him that that hadn’t happened…but what she did say…it was even worse. 

“I went to him willingly. I let him do this to me. I didn’t fight him,” Zahra corrected him, her voice weak. 

Like that made it any better. Like that…

“You were so young,” he said softly. “Gods…Zahra..” his voice broke, and he couldn’t speak anymore.

He didn’t even have the words…didn’t even have the thoughts…didn’t…

“He hurt you,” he choked out.  It wasn’t a question.

A shuddering breath from her. 

“Yes,” Zahra answered weakly. “It…I did it once for medicine. But after that…I did it for money. I came back and I let him do it to me again. And again. And when he got bored, he thought of something new, something worse and…He did things to me…I didn’t even know you could do that to another person.” 

His entire body was shaking with rage. The shadows wreathing around him darkened almost into black. 

He had never wanted to rip another person into pieces with his bare hands as much as he wanted to right now. 

Madja stilled next to them, her hands still on Zahra’s skin…trying to heal the worst of it, Azriel could feel that. 

The healer’s face was carefully blank, but Azriel had known her long enough to see the subtle signs of anger. Madja had an incredibly good mask, but Azriel was able to read people when they didn’t want to be read.

And…there was another thing…

“Do your sisters know?” he asked weakly. Did they know and still treated Zahra like they did? Ignored her outright at some points and wished she didn’t exist at others? 

The dynamic had been fucked up from the start…the first time they had met Zahra she had been in her maid uniform…clearly treated not as a member of their family but as staff. 

But they had believed…they all had believed that maybe the change from human to fae was good for one thing and that would fall away…that this could heal…that all 4 of them could be sisters, properly, now. Maybe something that went well for once. 

Now Azriel wondered how naive he had been in particular. 

He was a bastard just as she was. Azriel would never be accepted by his half-brothers either. His half-brothers had ruined his hands. And her sisters…

“Nesta…Nesta thinks I had an affair with a married man,” Zahra choked out. “Which I did. Kind of.” 

A horrible, bitter laugh tore itself out of the Azriel’s chest. “An affair…” he repeated, disbelieving. “You didn’t have an affair. You were raped.”

“I let him do it. I did it willingly,” Zahra disagreed, her voice weak. 

She had agreed, because otherwise they would have starved. 

“You were fifteen!” Azriel whispered, anger flaring up with his grief. “You were a child! You were nothing but a goddamn child. And you did what you had to to survive. You sacrificed yourself for your family’s survival!” He took a deep, shuddering breath, trying to get a grip on his own emotions.

Madja’s hands were still moving over the skin of her stomach, her face set in a heavy grimace.

Zahra’s eyes were fixed on his face, her breaths still shallow and pained. “I am sorry.”

He couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t stand her apologies. Not right now. Not for this.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” he whispered, pressing another kiss to the back of her hand.

“You were just a child,” Azriel repeated, voice choked. “None of this is your damn fault.” For once… she didn’t protest. 

Zahra just closed her eyes, a few tears trickling out from between her lashes.

Madja’s hands stilled, and then the healer carefully pulled away. She didn’t say anything, and Azriel felt a new fear fill his chest. “What is it?” He asked her. “What’s wrong?”

“The scarring is…extensive,” Madja said carefully. “I am…I am sorry, but I think you may be barren.”

Zahra didn’t even flinch.

“I know,” Zahra answered, her voice flat. “I haven’t bled in years until now.” The words were like someone driving an ice-cold knife between his ribs and into his heart.

He didn’t care that she couldn’t carry his children. He didn’t fucking care. 

He only needed to know that she was safe and healthy…But to know she had been hurting for so many years…to know that she had sacrificed herself for her family…it broke his heart. 

And they didn’t even know that she had done that. 

Madja’s expression darkened further. Perhaps at the thought of what Zahra had been forced to endure, or perhaps because this new information opened up a whole other level of complication.

“That…does explain why the bleeding has been so severe,” the healer said. “Gods, child.”

There was silence in the room, Azriel still gripping Zahra’s hand in his. 

He didn’t care that she couldn’t give him children, not unless she wanted to. But the fact that she would never have a choice in the matter. That she had sacrificed not just her innocence, but the future she could have had, for her family’s sake…

He clenched his jaw so tightly he was surprised it didn’t crack.

Zahra was staring up at the ceiling, her emotions carefully schooled and hidden away. So cold and indifferent…so numb. Numb. 

He could recognise the signs because he often felt like that as well. 

Azriel wanted to hold her. He wanted to pull her up to his chest and into his arms and hide her from the entire world. From all the horrors and nightmares that she had been forced to endure.

Protecting and keeping her and making sure she never hurt again…

“I have some potions for you to take…I’ll ask Violet to make you some specially tailored for you…” Madja said softly. 

Violet was the apothecary they used for most of their potions. And also the one that Zahra did the accounts for. 

Azriel forced himself to nod. Zahra made some vague murmur of understanding, as Madja put said potions on the bedside table. 

Madja turned her gaze to Azriel, dark eyes searching his face. “You should stay with her tonight,” she said quietly. “Make sure the bleeding doesn’t get worse and call me immediately if it does.”

Azriel nodded again. He wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon, not unless Zahra asked him to leave.

The healer rose, giving another glance at the two of them. She made a sound in the back of her throat, as though she wanted to say something, but she just gave a single nod before turning and leaving the room.

And then it was just the two of them in the room. Azriel sat crouched next to her on the bed, his hand still clamped around hers.

He didn’t know what the damn hell he was supposed to say.

“I’m sorry.” And there she was, apologizing yet again for something that wasn’t her fault in the least. 

His eyes widened at her voice, the unexpectedness of it breaking the silence in the room.

“What?” He asked, his voice cracking. “What could you possibly be sorry for?”

She didn’t open her eyes, but he saw her expression flicker slightly. “For…for this.” She said hoarsely. “For making you deal with this.”

His heart felt like it was collapsing in on itself again. “You didn’t make me do anything,” he said quietly. “And you have nothing to apologise for.”

[iichfilwypj]

his dreamy girl | percy jackson

ღ percy jackson x daughter of hypnos! reader ღ warnings: i mention a hit? this is pure fluff to me im very bad at this. Also i was falling asleep and i thought of these so it might suck <3 ღ wc: 685 pt 2 - pt 3 - pt 4 - pt 5 - pt 6 - pt 7

“And then he tried to steal my sword! The one that literally comes back to me! How stupid can you be?” his rambles echoed through Cabin 3 that hot, dark night. Some hours earlier, the blue team had won Capture the Flag, and Percy was especially excited to share all the details with her. 

Like every other time, she hadn’t attended; not because she wasn’t skilled with weapons, but because no one had managed to wake her from her nap. When Grover tried, he received a slap and a mumbled, “The horses are hungry”, in response.

So there she was, lying on Percy’s bed in her pajamas with a face mask on, listening to him recount how he had hit Clarisse on the nose, how he had nearly eaten dirt, and how Annabeth had, once again, shoved him into the lake. His voice was extremely high-pitched, and she was on the verge of bursting into tears.

That was something she hated about being a daughter of Hypnos. Although her father had blessed her with the divine power to control her dreams –and believe me, being a demigod, that was very, very nice–, he also gifted her with a constant sense of fatigue. At breakfast? She was tired. Lunch? She was tired. Oh, she just woke up from a five-hour nap? So what, she was still tired. She couldn’t help it, no matter how hard she tried. 

When she met Percy, she quickly became friends with the boy who, instead of ignoring her for hours until she apologized for something she couldn’t control, set up a cozy little corner for her in his cabin, with pillows, stuffed animals, candles, and even tea bags. Come on, that boy was willing to challenge his dyslexia just to read something for her before bed.

“And then Annabeth goes, Well, you should run faster. Like, what!? I run very fast, sorry–” Percy’s shout jolted his friend out of her daydream, having closed her eyes as thoughts raced through her mind. She looked at him, watching as he fiddled with the sheets, and decided she couldn’t take it anymore.

“Hey, ocean breath” she murmured, and to him, her voice sounded like a fucking angel’s. Seeing her there, in his bed made him feel like an idiot and a coward. 

He looked at her with curiosity, quickly recalling what he was about to share and feeling excited to tell about it. “What? I was about to tell you how she crashed into the tree,” but as her eyes slowly rolled back, Percy realized what was happening. He couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his lips. “Oh, Zeus, don’t tell me you’re tired!”

He moved closer to her, resting his head on his pillow and basically lying down on top of her. By the way her head was tilting to the side, he knew he only had a few minutes left before she fell completely asleep. 

And yes, he totally chose those last minutes to tease her.

“Oh god, you’re like a baby! No, like a puppy. Wait, was it cats that slept like sixteen hours a day?” the girl tried to push him away with the little strength she had left, but Percy knew that deep down, she enjoyed this. Well, maybe not being squished by him, but knowing that he didn’t see her sleep as a bad thing.

She would never know, but Percy's favorite pastime was admiring her while she slept –oh my god, of course he couldn’t tell her that, it sounded really creepy. He cherished every detail about her, and if she was happy sleeping, he would make the whole world fall into an eternal slumber just to please her.

“Go to sleep, dreamy,” he said, gently flipping them both so she was on top of him. After turning off the little lamp beside the bed, his hands found their way to her back, stroking it softly. She buried her face in his neck and sighed. He dared to say “I love you”

But she was already lost in her dreams, and he was completely head over heels.

again, i am slut for fluff!!!! <3

[filthyguts]

sketchbook doodles as it’s 4 am so I thought maybe . I’d share my specific kira headcanons from my twit thread. Strap in its unda the cut and it’s a lot because I’m normal about him whatever

- HATES dogs due to an incident from when he was a kid, slight phobia

- I’m always 50/50 on this but I like the headcanon of kira potentially having a type of albinism, both his parents carried the gene

-he’s superstitious, on account of his mother being VERY superstitious, which probably didn’t help with any compulsions he was dealing with internally as a kid and into adulthood

-Liked to burn ants and bigger bugs with a magnifying glass as a kid

-surprisingly low pain tolerance

-Has never kissed another person (until he kissed shinobu on the cheek during BTD)

this extends to other things do with this information what you will *large sign in flashing lights that says VIRGINNNNNN*

-he does not know how to kiss. because he hasn't done it to an actual living breathing person, if he were too in earnest it's intense he's all teeth and tongue it would be literally terrible, but he does give sweet knuckle kisses

he can give a polite cheek kiss but if he had to do one of the lips he’d be cooked like it would be over for him he might bite your tongue off on accident(or..?) like ur better off sticking two fingers in his mouth and hoping for the best instead of getting your lip ripped off

-absolutely LOVES the smell of a fresh coat of nail polish, doesn't care that it makes him light headed

-super veiny hands and wrists one paper cut and it's over for him

-killer queen feels really cold to touch, but its arms and hands are hot

-average at playing the violin, does dabble from time to time in the quiet of his home but it's not very often

-yes we know he sucks fingers but he also likes to likely gnaw because he likes the texture on his teeth (not in a cannibal way though he thinks the idea of actually eating flesh is disgusting and irresponsable)

-just really loves neutrals and easter colors, designer suits all the way obvi

-when he first gained killer queen (I hc he was about 19) it always looked like this pic below with the exposed skull, only when he started to better mask his homicidal tendencies and urges did KQ gain its "mask"" and how we see it now

-despite his obvious feline affiliations he doesn't want a pet cat, the hair getting everywhere would drive him crazy (plus he's got killer queen

-kira didn't name killer queen himself, the only time it ever spoke to him was once. when he first manifested KQ after the arrow, Killed Queen told Kira it's name quietly while standing behind him, this scared the shit out of him, which sounds badass and spooky but was also probably subconsciously because Kira had a Queen CD he purchased a year prior that he liked WELL UR JUST SEVENTEEN AND ALL YOU WANNA DO IS DISAPPEAR

-occasionally drinks (that's canon) but meaning he likes to get winedrunk with his girlfriends on special occasions, or socially drinks when forced to go out for company outings, once came home decently hammered and almost phoned a travel agency to get a one way plane ticket to France to see the Mona Lisa ,

did not follow through with this when he woke up the next morning. The idea of seeing her at the Louvre is almost too much for him, feels like touching an exposed nerve.

-is 100% having sloppy makeout sessions with his severed hand girlfriend with candles, dim lighting, and mood records + thinks it's the peak of romance and gets giddy about it like someone with their first crush. Because he's insane

-can feel a phantom sense for Sheer Heart Attack, no pain due to its durability, but can feel the heat tracking in his hand and it readying to explode once it’s found its target. The tracking feels like a tingling sensation to him akin to a compass, like a pulling. and the explosion feels like a pleasant blossom of warmth

-loves the subtle flavor of different lotions (not freshly applied) that linger on the skin, salty fruity fragrant and slightly chemically is his favorite. 🤢

- tries to be incredibly Normal when going for routine dental checkups and cleanings for obvious reasons. When he was in his early 20s and didn’t quite have his urges and homicidal tendencies in check- one of his early victims was a dental hygienist

-his dad(yoshihiro) was into cheesy action movies and would often take kira when he was a kid to the theater, kira didn’t really care for it overall, the explosions were always cool though.

He doesn’t watch movies often but he doesn’t mind drama and romance.

-gets cold pretty easily

-scary good at walking quietly, like a cat stalking prey, when he started working at kameyu- he went to hand some documents to a coworker, startling them pretty bad bc they didn’t hear him come up- he IMMEDIATELY stopped doing that unconsciously after that incident, he makes sure his footsteps are “normal” are soft, not aggressive, but can hear heard enough.

- in the moment he likes the feeling of blood drying on his skin, but once the adrenaline wears off he’ll wrinkle his nose and be like >:// then hop in the bath to clean up(it’s usually not his bath)

-went to the same school Reimi Sugimoto attended in Morioh, never once did he hold a solid conversation with her, she only spoke to him briefly once about missed homework. But that’s not to say he didn’t know who she was. Eerie :(

- His SECOND favorite early spring, likes taking strolls along to coast with his girlfriends, enjoys the breeze.

But his FIRST favorite season is summer, when all the tourists come to Morioh. It’s easy for people traveling to simply disappear 😨

-aside from nail biting, had a compulsive skin picking habit as a child but this was quickly squashed by his mother who’d give him a swat on the wrist each time he was caught

-subconsciously wishes his girlfriends could grab him back- (this isn’t to say he wants to rest of the person though 🤢) a squeeze on the waist or shoulder would probably do him good but it’s not like he consciously yearns for this- it would shatter his otherwise perfect lived fantasy and setup of control 😒

-his favorite finger is tied between either the pointer or the ring finger. He likes being able to bend the fingers and do what he wants, relishes in the subtle crack of the joints 🤢

anddddd that’s all for now. hell isn’t hot enough for him

[rainbowsuitcase]

The Winter Soldier - Rewatched

I decided to rewatch CA:TWS after about five years and I have some thoughts.

1. There’s "moon landing" written on Steve's list of things to catch up on. This movie is happening two years after the first Avengers and Google says Steve woke up a year before that. What the hell has he been doing for three years that he hasn’t had the time to catch up on moon landing? Moon landing!

2. Again, Steve's been living in this century for three years and yet, when Sam asks him what makes him happy, he doesn’t have an answer. He doesn’t know how to not be a soldier. He doesn’t know how to be anything but.

3. Regarding Civil War, people say it's ironic that Steve is the one against the accords because he’s always the one following orders (and similar crap) but that’s literally not true? In CA:TFA, Captain America as a hero is literally born from Steve going against orders to save Bucky. In this movie, he disagrees with project Insight from the beginning and later, he’s the one to decide to take SHIELD down with it, because the organization cannot be trusted anymore. Steve Rogers was never "a good boy following orders." He was always a man who did what he thought was right.

4. Also, this movie is practically a PSA that you can’t trust these authorities, but people still expected Steve to just sign away his free will as a hero to one, just a movie later? bfr

5. I am convinced that if he went shield first, Steve could easily run through a wall. At least in America, walls are made of paper there.

6. If I remember correctly, the Winter Soldier is the only enemy of Captain America that uses the shield against him in such capacity, and that’s just a really nice touch.

7. On that note, the Winter Soldier on his own is such a cool character that I would definitely want to see more of if there wasn’t, you know, tortured and brainwashed Bucky under there.

8. If one of them was a woman they'd end up together. I know the fandom says it a lot but I completely forget how painfully true that is. We spend a third of the movie, at least, with Natasha trying to find Steve a girlfriend and wondering why he doesn’t have one, and that’s a plotline that doesn’t get resolved in the movie. Steve says he doesn’t date because it’s "kinda hard to find someone with shared life experience," in the very same movie where he finds out that his lifelong best friend, possibly the only person on earth with "shared life experience," is still alive. If Bucky was a woman, this would be called foreshadowing.

9. And to end on a positive note, Sebastian's face acting is literally perfect. He had like five lines in the whole movie and yet he brought Bucky to life so well. He gave the character a soul.

This scene is literal acting gold and Sebastian deserved an Oscar for these five seconds alone.

[blackbirdi]

The Roommate Problem

Brief Description: Over all the years you and Jason have been friends, you've never found him to have any flaws, until you two decided to move in together. Jason was the perfect roommate, until he started coming home way louder than was necessary, constantly waking you up throughout random times in the night.

Point of View: 2nd Person

Word Count: 1662

Character: Jason Todd x Reader

Age: Jason - 22, Reader - 21

Being roommates with your best friend was a mostly smart decision.

You knew you could trust Jason to always hand rent in on time, he would get groceries when you mentioned you were running low on something, and whenever something was broken Jason was always ready to try and fix it, or call for help when he couldn't. All-in-all, your best friend, Jason Todd, was a great roommate, a perfect roommate; but you forgot one little thing when you asked him to move in with you: he was a vigilante.

Jason being Red Hood wasn't necessarily a bad thing, you really only found one thing bad about it. But boy, was it a bad thing. That thing was that Jason was out practically all night, coming home at any point in the dead of the night. And he wasn't exactly quiet about it either.

Almost every night you were awoken to Jason's annoyingly loud entering of your shared apartment. You found this particularly annoying because Jason was a vigilante he knew damn well how to be quiet. Sometimes you thought he was loud just to annoy you (which is probably true); at other times you thought it was because he knew he was home and knew he was able to let his guard down (which you found very sweet, but probably wasn’t the case).

And here you were, once again woken at ... 4:02?!

"Are you fucking kidding me, Jason?" you growl, having enough of this bullshit. This was the eighth - eighth - night in a row he had woken you up in the middle of the night.

Getting out of your nice, warm, comfortable bed, you slink out of your room and into yours and Jason's shared living room, finding Red Hood standing next to the window, closing it loudly.

"Morning," you greet dryly, sitting down in an armchair, glaring up at him.

Jason jumps, literally jumps as he hears your voice. His hand goes to his holster, removing a gun and aiming at your face.

You cock an eyebrow in question at the barrel staring you in the eye. You know better than to be afraid of the weapon, Jason would never fire that thing at you.

"Oh," Jason mumbles as he realizes it's just his roommate. He lowers his gun, putting it back into the holster before he removes his helmet, smiling at you softly. "Hey, Y/n, what are you doing up at this hour? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"I would be," you grumble, your gaze still a glare as he shows his face to you. "But someone was being extra loud this morning and woke me up."

It's almost impossible to see, but you still catch it: the smirk that briefly pulls on Jason's face before he puts on a face of sympathy.

"Oh, shit, Y/n/n, I'm sorry," Jason apologizes, setting his helmet down on the coffee table before he walks over to you. He sets one of his hands on each armrest, leaning down to be eye level with you.

You can't help the shiver that goes through you as he does this. It's intimidating as hell, but it's Jason, so you find it more attractive than anything else. You internally scold yourself the second that thought crosses your head.

"Are you?" you counter, crossing your arms. You fight the urge to look away, wanting Jason to know just how tired you were of his late night loudness.

"Of course I am," Jason replies earnestly, but you see right through him.

He's fighting back a smirk, a chuckle, anything that would give him away that he's been doing it on purpose. You can see the mirth in his eyes, the way they sparkle with amusement as he looks down at you.

To anyone else, they wouldn't think anything of Jason's attitude; but you've known him much longer than anyone else, you know for a fact that he's not sorry at all.

Your eyes narrow in doubt as he answers, and you voice your doubt to him immediately.

"For some reason, Jason, I have some doubts about that," you snap, your voice clear in showing your irritation.

Jason's eyebrows furrow as his lips form a slight pout, he leans closer to you, trying to look innocently as he asks, "What? Why?"

"Because I know you, Jason," you scowl, trying to fight down the growing blush on your cheeks. "I know when you're lying. And I know damn well that you have been purposely loud just to wake me up!"

"Trying to wake you up?" Jason echos, his lips twitching, as if he wants to smile at your claim. "Why would I do that?"

"I don't know," you huff, glaring up at him. "But I know that you know how to be more quiet than you have been, and I would appreciate it if you remained quiet entering our house. Unlike you, I have places to be during the day."

Finally letting the smile he was trying to suppress rise onto his face, Jason grins down at you, chuckling softly at your request.

"Why would I do that?" Jason questions playfully. "Maybe I want to keep waking you up everytime I get home."

"Why?" you ask, exasperated.

Jason's grin widens as he looks down at you, answering, "Maybe I want you to come and greet me when I get back home, just like I do when you get back from work."

You can't help but roll your eyes at Jason's words, 'Is he serious?'

"I'm not going to greet you very kindly when you're waking me up in the middle of the night," you sneer.

Jason laughs, leaning closer to you as he replies under his breath (but loud enough for you to hear), "I know. But it's nice coming home to someone I feel safe with, someone I know who has my back, someone I care about ... someone I love."

You can't help the red that spreads like a wildfire across your cheeks, the way your heart begins to pound furiously in your chest, or the way your breath catches at the back of your throat. You try to not let Jason notice any of it, but you know it's futile because it's Jason. But that still doesn't stop you from trying.

"Shut up," you grumble, pushing Jason away from you. "You're just saying that to get back in my good graces."

Jason chuckles lowly, your attempt to shove him away not working in the slightest. The only thing your attempt does is make Jason bring himself closer, causing your cheeks to heat up more.

"I am not," he argues softly. "I mean it when I say it, Y/n. I love seeing you; you bring me so much joy, I just have to wake you up so early just so I can see my favourite person ever."

Your heartbeat continues to rise, the tips of your ears beginning to turn red in embarrassment of Jason's words.

"Shut up," you snap, turning your head away from Jason so you don't have to look at him, because you know that your face is just going to turn more red if you do.

Jason chuckles again, his smirk fading into a soft smile as he looks at you look away from him.

"Ah, come on," he teases gently, grabbing your chin to make you face him. "What's got you all flustered, sweetheart?"

It feels as though your brain just shuts off. What is he doing??

"I - shut up," you scowl.

Jason smirks, countering, "Make me."

If it was possible, your face would've been glowing red at this point.

"I-I - uh," you stutter, wanting to look away from him but finding yourself unable to do so because he's got such a firm grip on your jaw.

It takes you another moment to respond (while Jason stands there and smirks at you). When you do respond, you grab his wrist and yank his hand off your jaw. You don't give him a chance to grab your chin again as you get off the armchair by the side (because Jason's standing in front of the chair) and glare up at him.

"I'm not joking when I ask this Jason: stop being so loud when you come home," Y/n snaps.

Jason chuckles, crossing his arms over his chest and staring down at you, clearly amused.

"Alright, alright," he huffs, rolling his eyes playfully. "I'll be quiet from now on."

You look up at him skeptically, narrowing your eyes.

Jason grins when he sees your reaction, taking a step closer to you and cupping your face with his hands.

"Y/n/n, I promise I'll be more quiet when I come home," he promises, kissing the tip of your nose.

Your blush comes back in full force at Jason's gentle affections.

"Okay, okay, I believe you," you relent, wrapping your slender fingers around Jason's wrists and removing them from your face. "I'm going to bed now; goodnight, Jace."

Jason smiles softly, opening him around up as he asks teasingly, "What? No goodnight hug?"

The smile that takes over your scowl can't be helped as you roll your eyes playfully at Jason and step into his arms, wrapping yours around his waist.

Jason squeezes you against his chest tightly, nuzzling his face into your hair, planting a soft kiss to the crown of your head.

You smile against Jason's chest, your ear in the perfect spot on his chest to hear the consistent beat of his heart.

"Night, Y/n/n," he whispers softly, squeezing you one last time before letting you go.

You step away from Jason, smiling up at him one last time before you turn around and head back to your bed. The only thoughts you have while laying in your bed a few minutes later are that maybe if he keeps being loud you won't complain about it, because at least then you know that he got home safe.

[kenlvry]

how would the main four (separate) react to fem reader sleeping on their shoulder on the bus

main 4 reacting to f!reader sleeping on their shoulder on the bus

17-18

kenny

at first he thought you was tryna be romantic and like yk lay on his shoulder

AND YOU TWO WERE THE TYPE TO PLAY AND LIKE NO ROMANCE AY ALL SO HE MOVED HIS SHOULDER and you head literally bumped the seat

it was so loud the whole bus went silent and his face is frozen. 😧"im so sorry i didn't know you were- cmon lay ur head back, i am sorry omfg"

you bring up it up the whole day and complain about 'your head hurting because of someone' and literally glare him.

next time when you lay your head on his shoulder he'll make sure to look at you before acting so impulsively ,🤗🤗

kyle

is literally a rock. the moment he feels your head on your his shoulder he immediately stops fighting with cartman infront of him

"okay simp" "stfu cartman ur lucky y/n is sleeping rn or else i would pull on your head".

is trying his best not to move, looks at you to see if ur comfortable. contemplates wether to move your head on his lap or just let you be

if there's a bump he holds your head so you don't jump with the whole bus.

if he moves even a little his head turns to you immediately to see if ur sleeping.

when you woke up you swore that sleeping on the bus wasn't as peaceful 🤨🤨

stan

is also immediately frozen like um...

literally stares at you the whole ride like how are you so calm while sleeping?? so cute omg 🤭🤭🤭

he asks the whole bus if they have a pillow or some sort and butters has one and he puts it on your head so you dont get neck pain from the position

refuses to move an inch until you woke up, it doesn't matter if he feels tired of the position hes in he is staying in that position, he can handle the pain.

holds back demons trying to yell at cartman to stfu so you can have a calm ride

may or may not take your pic.. i mean cmon the way the lighting was hitting you, it was too beautiful.

if you woke up he'd ask if you feel tired or need to take a quick nap again again

overall best nap youve had on the bus 👍👍👍

cartman

OKAY AT FIRST YOU WERE SLEEPING AGAINST THE WINDOW, and like if there was a bump you'd bump your head on the window and cartman was looking at your dumb self and tilt your head to his shoulder

when you wake up for a bit cartman acts as if he didn't do it and you js go back to sleep

AS MUCH AS HE WANTS RO PULL BACK AND LET YOU FALL HE HOLDS BACK FOR YOU, MANS IS INLOVE ‼️‼️

shushes everyone who gets slightly too loud because "y/n needs her beauty sleep"

he worries sm for your neck bc of the posture youre in but i mean.. he couldn't do anything so wtv

tells you to not do it again bc he hated it but inside literally wishes you did it again 🙏🙏

[khristie16]

The fast and forbidden

Charles is a famous F1 driver with everything one could want: fame, fortune, and fans. But he is missing one thing. Being his new personal assistant changes everything for both of them.

— chapter 4 Both are conflicted after their intimate experience. What Charles’s jealousy makes him act in a way is wasn't recognized even from his friends

warnings: 18+, masturbating, jealousy, angst

.........................................................................

That night was wild. As i went back to my room I felt embarrassment linger on my insides and I pushed my back to the right apartment door as I shut them behind me as if that would stop me from being hunted just by what happened. It never ever crossed my mind that literally my boss would have seen me naked under any circumstances. The cold shower did not help me from overthinking practically anything, it felt like I’m not even in control of my thoughts. I groaned in displeasure and went to my bedroom. Staying quiet to perhaps hear something from his room and cursing myself for even doing that after what has happened. Getting in my bed didn’t quite help me, it made my feelings for Charles even worse.

The next day I wake up with sweat covering my body, I hold my chest as if something has convinced me this body is no longer mine because it wasn’t when was Charles touching me. His fingers laced on my hot skin and my legs trembling as if he is the owner of my body and my body is no longer mine. His sinful eyes full of uncertainty of what’s to come and I believe I’m going to shatter right at the spot I was sitting on my bed here in a hotel. His touch was getting lost in my soft skin, and I swear I felt something inside of me, something that was growing and when I looked down it was him, entering me again and again until I screamed and woke up from this dream.

I thought I’m going to be sick. This is a lot to take, and I cannot function like that on daily basis. If there is one thing that I’d love, is to be able leave this dream pass but it feels like I took the most out of the dream. And I seem to cannot go back.

A sound coming from my phone startled me till I jumped on the seat still covered in sheets. I stand up with a hold of breath to look of who is it. Part of me was scared it might be Charles and I would have to approach him. But instead, a little disappointment filled my body when I saw the guy from yesterday has messaged me. What was his name again? Ah yes, Patrick.

His comforting questions about my well being made me pause for a sec and made my body to relax. But it was soon replaced with anxiety. What am I supposed to do with this man now? I cannot shake the feeling of the..., dream, perhaps nightmare, I cannot say. I still have the perfect image of Charles on top of me doing all of those…. In and out movements. It makes me sick, and ashamed. God damn, I shouldn’t be dreaming about such things. But I shouldn’t be hard on myself that much, it’s enough that Charles was hard on me…literally.

I shake my head to somewhat shake the thought off and I finally saw clearly the words typed down on my phone again.

Hey! Yeah, I slept well.

I toss the phone on the couch again and make my way to a bathroom. In the mirror reflection I see flushed cheeks and dirty hair. How can someone have passionate sex and look good meanwhile? It was just a dream and yet I look like if I had truly experienced that. Maybe it is because it felt like that.

Charles’s POV

Charles couldn’t sleep immediately after YN has left. He didn’t understand why he was wide awake, but he caught himself afterwards he is still going back to the image of YN being naked in front of him in his bedroom. It made him feel some shivers running down his spine and he couldn’t judge if it is good or not. All his awareness was filled with her and after staring blanky on the ceiling he gave up on sleeping and went to bathroom to jerk himself off. He tried hard to not make it obvious to him that he had a certain image in front of his eyes in his mind, but he couldn’t hide it that well. He knew this delusional act and pretending wouldn’t last long. So, as he fell to his bed again, he felt a sudden emptiness in his body, and he fell asleep with the last thought of YN in the blank space he fell in his stomach.

Charles now has found himself in a cafeteria lobby with his friend Joris. As they were casually talking about tonight’s upcoming night out, he finally felt good about being able to think just about anything else but her. But it didn’t stay that long. As if Joris knew since the beginning there is something of with Charles related to YN, he took a good look at Charles before speaking up. Joris knew Charles has changed and that is why he even offered for a personal assistant position to take place, but his cold demeanor to her was something everyone saw. Either if it was Carla or Andrea. Everyone saw through him that it was a weird thing to watch at. And as so for Joris as one of his best friends, he wanted to push Charles to his limits.

‘I saw YN yesterday.’

Charles stuck a little in his movement before trying to smooth his behavior to a more relaxed one. Good for Joris he has and excellent eye for a detail and it didn’t run from his attention.

‘Okay. So what?’

Joris chuckled rather quietly and liked this game already. Pushing your best friend about a topic his friend is clearly passionate about was something thrilling. To be honest, there is a very fine line between passion and hate. And with hate there comes anger or resentment.

‘She was with a man. A fine man, luxurious car and stuff’

Charles stuck in his movement again but swiftly get back to his previous position. Now the chuckle left Joris’s lips. He was met with a furious gaze from his best friend as he asked.

‘What?!’

Joris laughed and tried so hard to hide it but failed. He put his fist in front of his mouth to mask it with a cough, but his eyes couldn’t lie.

‘Nothing, just nothing’

Charles didn’t like what was Joris doing. He is not dumb, he knew. But he wasn’t mad at Joris, he was frustrated with himself.

‘Well, she can do whatever she wants.’

Joris eyes went high on his forehead as he couldn’t believe Charles let himself be this obvious.

‘Something happened Charles?’

An awkward silence filled the space as a waitress approached their table to refill their drinks. Both acted as if nothing happened and Joris was getting curious if there was something more in this situation between those two. As the waiter left their table Joris made it clear what his intentions are with a loud cough and gesturing for Charles to talk.

Charles refused to give in and acted like a little bitch.

‘Nothing happened!’

He reached for his refilled drink just to spill it on his jeans and grunted in pure discomfort. Not just about jeans, but about his best friend pushing him. He took his mobile phone and went upstairs, leaving Joris in awe.

During the day Charles focused on trainings and both acted like the other didn’t exist. But as much as Charles has tried to forget about what is happening inside of him, the more he lingered back in thoughts to her.

YN POV

It made me sad to be in such a position. The last thing I thought was that Charles would be acting so cold towards me. On one side I get it that it’s for the best, because of what had happened, but I remember fondly his remark from the evening. What a shame you’re leaving. I really don’t know what to make out of that. It looked like he was toying with me. And I don’t like that. But at the same time, I am the ‘victim in here’. I was put in a vulnerable position and even though Charles has nothing to do with how badly I took this experience, he didn’t have to be so cold towards me. Not more then before. I wasn’t well aware why I feel this way, but I definitely didn’t like it. That is why I shift my focus on Patrick. I deducted since Charles is completely ignoring me, I will be free tonight, as the same as yesterday, what won’t be the same is my naïve brain leading me to his apartment.

I’ll pick you up at seven;)

As I was preparing the beautiful dress for tonight’s event with Patrick, I added some light blush on my cheeks that matched with my red lipstick going well with long gown dress, perfect for a night out in a luxurious restaurant with a handsome man. For the first time this day, I smiled softly to myself and put on high heels. With all the pain conflicting inside of me I forgot the pain of wearing heals. At least I gained something from this fiasco with Charles. Or whatever it is.

I reach for the door to head out and with the swift of air brushing my hair I see Charles with his fist in the eye level to knock, I suppose. I stay still and watch him in confusion.

‘Hi’

He made an awkward presence with his greeting; this was another level of confusion. How can one act to cold and then when they open their mouth, they sound like a lost tad?

‘You’re heading somewhere?’

I stopped the thinking cycle happening again in my head and composure well.

‘Well… yes? I was planning to head out, I assumed you don’t need me today.’

He titled his head and furrowed his eyebrows as If I had said the dumbest thing ever. I scoff internally.

‘And why did you assume that?’

That’s where he got me. I didn’t ask, He didn’t tell me. I was naïve again to think that. Or more of so it was his fault he did not say a thing. But I am under him and If I want to pursue my dreams, I need to have this job. At least to keep it for a month or two.

‘I’m sorry, I interpreted the message wrong. You need me for today’s evening I suppose?’

He just nodded and start with his eyes looking at me closely from head to toe. It was hot suddenly. *gulp*

‘I see you are ready already. Let me change and we can go,’

‘Where?’

He gave me a wink and left me speechless on the mid way from my room to the corridor. I was getting more and more mad at him. I gritted through my teeth and went inside to sit down and write a message to Patrick. I was sad at one point that I’m going to miss on this date.

Hey Patrick, I’m sorry, but work came into my plan for this evening. I would love to dismiss such obligation, but I cannot unfortunately:( xoxo.

Left with my thoughts, Charles opened his door and came out in full tux. He looked hot. And my mouth agreed since I had to fight it hard to not gape. Put yourself together.

‘Let’s go’

That’s all he said and there was just silence between us. I didn’t know where he is taking me, but I really didn't have much of a choice so instead I stayed silent till the full ride to the destination.

Another boring event. A lot of people, too many champagnes and too much obnoxious talk. Or am I just hateful? I couldn’t care less right now. All I wanted to be spared of this, but I guess I have some job to do here as Charles’s personal assistant, which I couldn’t quite put the finger on the reason for bringing me here.

As we stayed by side and observing what’s happening around us, some old man approached us. The next thing boiled my blood. Charles’s hand landed on my waist on the back and pushed me closer to him, just a little but it was known to me. I was too lost in confusion to say anything about it, plus I didn’t want to make a scene. Not because of Charles, but because of me. I prefer peace rather than conflicts. So, I obeyed and acted however I was supposed to do in this moment. It is not like anyone expected me to talk so I wandered around the room to see a familiar face. Patrick.

My eyes almost fell out and the anxiety that numbed my limbs was almost too much to bear. Patrick was clearly confused and did not understand. I started shaking my head as a try to tell him it is not what it looks like. He stayed looking at me but then took his focus on Charles. He eyed him up and down. I don’t’ know what I wanted in that moment, but I was clearly just stuck. My mind and my body.

‘Hey YN’

I turn my head around to see Joris. The anxiety level rose high, and I scarred looked on Patrick again, but he was fortunately not looking at my direction now.

‘Are you alright?’

I turned again to talk to Joris. Charles was aware Joris came in and he left the embrace on my back. I took this opportunity to escape to Joris instead.

‘Hi, sorry. I’m just overwhelmed.’

His eyes went straight to my back, looking straight through my middle and right back up.

‘I can see that.’

I shook my head and excused myself to go to the lady’s room.

*inhale* *exhale* again and again

Did it help? Temporarily. I escaped now but I cannot keep running from myself. I should have said something before. In the car on our way here. I should have said more to Patrick so this situation wouldn’t escalate to something bigger than it is. But what I know? I don’t know what Patrick thinks.

‘Whatever’

I got fed up with the same second and opened the doors to walk back, yet again, the same pair of green eyes hunting me everywhere.

‘What happened YN?’

At this moment I was feeling sorry for Charles. Because I was furious. And I raised my voice. At my boss.

‘What happened? You are asking me?’ I scoffed so hard it was visible for anyone to know how furious I am, ‘You’re the one who should be answering that question! What was that about huh? The touching? Holding my waist?’

Charles’s eyes showed conflict and fear as he didn’t know how to react. This was the first time I saw him not knowing what to do or say, his confidence far away from him now.

‘I- ‘

‘WHAT’

He shut his mouth immediately and looked mad. I exhaled and let my shoulders to fall to relax.

‘I’m sorry for raising my voice at you.’

Charles was still silent, but no in his mind. There was clearly something happening. He opened his mouth but shut it again.

‘YN?’

We both turned our gaze to the right to see Patrick. In the field of my eyes, I saw Charles’s composure to stiffen, and his face hardened.

‘And you are doing what exactly?’

A visible mockery in his voice lingered its way to Patrick who stopped walking towards me, confusion transformed to disgust and took a defensive composure.

God help me.

[vee-beeee]

The Tent

Okay this is a change from dbh LOL

So im figuring out how to write for these characters, and its going to be harder because its 4 people so PLEASE forgive me.

Warnings: Tents, enclosed spaces with 4 boys

Chocobros x reader (can be taken as platonic)

Im sorry for any spelling errors or plot holess

SORRY IF THIS HAS BEEN DONE BEFORE

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You woke up

And then wished you didn't.

It smelt like sweaty socks and boys.

Someone had shoved your back into their front, and was snoring VERY loudly. Another person had his socks in your face, sprawled out over what looked to be Noctis himself. So the case of the smelly socks was solved, that had to be Prompto. You didn't see anyone else in your line of vision, but guessing at how strong and muscular the arm around you was...

Gladio had turned you into his own personal teddy bear.

You gently tried to roll out of his grip, but he grunted and held on to you with a stronger grasp. You sighed and searched for another way out, you need air and to be away from this tent.

You briefly wondered if tickling Prom would wake him up so he could help, but you didn't really want to touch his feet.

So you sat, starting at the tent walls and daring to breathe through your mouth.

You thought about falling asleep again but whenever you tried, Gladio's snoring woke you up just as you were on the cusp of the dream realm.

What a terrible way to start your morning.

Finally, FINALLY you heard someone stir. You turned your body as much as you could in Gladio's grip and saw Ignis's hair over a massive leg.

"Ignis!" you whisper-yelled, hoping to get his attention. He turned around, sleep very much apparent on his face, and looked the entirety of the tent until his eyes caught yours.

"Miss Y/N?" He mumbled, raising an eyebrow at your position, Gladio crowding your back and Proms feet in your face. You had also felt Noctis was really close to your knees, you could feel his hair whispering against your skin. It was ticklish and uncomfortable.

Ignis huffed out a laugh, and you proceeded to beg him to help you.

"Why of course, Dear Y/N. However, I believe Gladio is going to kill me in his sleep if I remove you from his hold. I can help with Prompto and Noct however."

You sighed, sad he wouldn't even TRY not to get killed by Gladio. You watched him as he harshly rolled Prompto off of Noctis, and you were briefly worried that he would awake.

He just snorted and continued sleeping.

Ignis next went to Noctis to gently move his head away from your leg. Of course, Noct slept like a corpse so he didn't even notice. You took your chance to thank him, and ask a favor

"Can you leave the tent flap open I need air please."

Ignis nodded, and exited the tent, leaving the flap open. You started to bask in fresh air and morning light, but then the world turned upside down.

Gladio was rolling over, treating your body like you were an actual teddy bear.

He was now slightly under you, both arms surrounding you with the literal strength of a Titan.

And you were suffocating in his chest.

In ANY other scenario you would have been like "nice" . But in this one you could not breathe. And that was a problem. So you started gently saying his name.

Gladio groaned, but stayed asleep. You tried wrestling your arms out from his iron grip, but no use.

So you did the only thing you could think of.

Loud enough for him to clearly hear you, you poked the bear

"Ooo this book of gladios looks so good, im going to read it while eating chips and wipe my fingers on the pages and fold the edges to mark where i am. Surely he wont mind"

Suddenly you were shoved as his eyes shot open and he released you, sitting up to look around huffing.

"NO THATS MY COLLECTORS EDITION!" you breathed and rolled over as he looked around and found his book by his belongings.

Then he turned to you, brows furrowed and irritation clear on his features for 1. being woken up and 2. having his most prized book threatened.

"What the hell was that for?"

You moved onto your back and stuck your tongue out at him

"You were suffocating me in your pecs, I had to get free some how"

His anger faded into an embarrassed smile, and then a smug smirk.

"A lot of girls would pay real money to get suffocated in these pecs."

You rolled your eyes as hard as you could and he let out a hardy laugh, which accidently woke Prompto.

He snorted as he awoke, leaning on his elbows before asking "uh whats slo funmny?" and then promptly fell flat on his face, going back to his dreamless sleep.

You and Gladio stayed quiet before looking at each other and chuckling quietly. Gladio winked at you and turned to leave the tent. You watched his huge shadow as it moved across the tent, and then it disappeared.

After a couple of minutes, you heard Gladio and Ignis in the camp talking, and saw an opportunity to get more sleep. So you found your original spot and comfy sleeping bag, and settled in.

(A couple hours later)

You woke up, blinking your eyes slowly, feeling that you had gotten a good rest. You looked around and saw the Prompto had seemingly left, and you didn't see anyone else so that must mean Noct left too.

You closed your eyes again, resting them for a moment before you felt something moving around your front. You jumped and accidently smacked your elbow against the something. And that something groaned.

You looked down to see a mess of black hair nuzzling into YOUR blanket.

"Noct?" You leaned on your elbows and he looked up at you sleepily before groaning out a response

"you have the good blankets."

and then he was gone. But luckily, you had help to wake him back up.

Ignis had heard your surprised yelp, and knew it was time for Noct to get up. He had been chatting with Gladio and Prompto about how to pay for more car renovations, but that conversation could be put on hold.

Ignis grabbed a pot and one of his spatulas, before leaning down into the tent flap.

And then he started hitting them repeatedly together.

He saw you cry out and put your hands over your ears, and Noct just sat up slowly and glared at him.

Ignis smirked and left the tent when he saw Noct leaving, and you followed shortly after.

You watched Iggy put his utensils away and you went straight for the middle of the circle of chairs you all had put together the night before. Noct had just slumped down his camping chair when you started talking.

"Why do you guys love piling on me so much when we sleep? Like I wake up and your all over me."

You stood stalk still and waited for a response. You heard groaning and looked over to see Noct open one eye and looking at you.

"Smell nice and warm"

and then he was asleep.

Ignis sighed and walked over to shake him awake and you turned to see Gladio and Prompto nodding their heads. Gladio was the first to say something.

"I think he's right. Your a little babe space heater." You flushed, and he and Prompto laughed seeing your face.

"Yeah and you uhh, kinda smell a lot like roses." was Proms response, and now you watched him go red. Gladio slapped him on the back and Ignis chuckled quietly, continuing to try and wake Noctis up.

So your consensus was to buy more blankets, and an air freshener.

Fair enough.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THANKS FOR READING

I dont know if this is cringe or how I did, but I hope I did good on my first time writing these guys.

Hope you enjoyeddd

[riswippiesx]

Fallen God! Gojo Satoru X Fem! Reader part: two

| Part one

Your way back to your apartment was quite silent. You were irritated, you really were. How could a stranger ever dare to kiss you? But why did his touch felt so familiar? Why did you feel like you waited so long to feel that touch? What was this feeling? Longing? No way. That was a stranger.

You brushed away all your thoughts and changed back into your comfortable cloths. You didn't have work. It was a day off. You relaxed and sat on the couch and took your phone. What was his name? You could have asked for his name, maybe? No. Stop. You need to stop thinking about some mere stranger!

You tried hard to brush off his thoughts the entire day, untill you fell asleep, you really did, but...the dram which woke you up around 4 am was not something you were expecting in a normal day.

You were in happily roaming around, with a man. His silhouette was all you could remember. He was tall. And that was it. You couldn't remember any other detail about him. A faint voice addressed you as "Y/n".. The scenery— that didn't seem very modern, rather it felt like some forbidden, forgotten forest? You weren't sure.

What was it? If it was really a dream why did it feel so real? You had no answer to that.

You would be alright if it was a one time thing. Every day you had the same dream, same scenary, same man, except, each night it reveled his features, one by one. One day you saw his white hair which was quite an indication to that very stranger you met, but you forcibly brushed your thoughts away.

Another day, you saw his gorgeous blue eyes, adoring you, loving you. Again a similarity with that pervert? No way! You were pissed about everything, including your mind for letting you be captivated by a literal pervert!!

But that specific thoughts about him was brushing away every day. You wanted to see the full face of that man. And maybe you felt like that man was that one stranger, you knew so but you didn't know how.

Then the dreams stopped, just to reveal all of it at a certain night. You saw everything clearly. You knew everything clearly. You could recall everything, very clearly. A faint hug, then a pair of lips, falling on your own, giving your the warmth of eternity.

You woke up, with tears flooding your face. You were crying. It was him. Not a pervert, it was him. It was Gojo. It was your Gojo-sama.

You felt like running straight to him. You needed to see him right then. But you didn't even ask for his address. But you would find him anyhow!

You reached to that certain shop once it was morning. You couldn't want any longer. You asked the locals about his whereabouts and found a trace. You ran to that place as your mind danced in joy, joy of seeing him again when you won't fail to recognise him.

Buy your happiness was quick to vanish once you found the apartment empty. The crappy apartment where you were supposed to find him was just empty without any further trace.

You again asked the locals about any place where he could possibly move to. But you didn't find any clue. You came back to his one room apartment. Where was he? Where would you search for him now?

You sat on the floor, feeling the bitter of a losing game. The wind blew, played with your hair in rhythm, which spoke of longing, years of wait and forgotten love. A piece of paper stated to fly with the wind and rested infront of you.

You eyed the paper and took it in your hands. It gave you warmth only to snatch it away right after. Your eyes were teary as you read:

"I know, maybe you would recall everything one day and come to find me, but my love, let's not meet this time. I can recall how my curse fell upon you in your past life. I can't let it happen to you again. So I am distancing myself from you. I can't live there where I know I could see you further. It would force me to meet you again. I won't let that happen. I love you, I still do. You are the only one for me. I lived so many years with your memories, thinking you won't ever come back but you did. And I met you. I can continue living with that piece of happiness. So don't look behind to find me, don't cry for me either. I won't be there to wipe your tears and knowing that my soul hurts. So for me, look ahead, where a bright future awaits you."

You sat there, didn't know what to do. You felt like a very dear part of your heart was taken away from you, forever. Your sin for pushing your god away was so sinful that your god was punishing you such way? You couldn't think anymore. The very known faint scent of him tantalised you, comforting you to look ahead of you where you could see bright lights, except the source of the light wasn't him.

Here's the second and LAST part of fallen god! Gojo x reader 😷☝️ thanks a lot for such amazing response in the first part. Also thanks for requesting! Take love<3333333333

Thanks for reading♡

Also i'm planning a series for suguru geto x fem reader. So, maybe first part soon? 👀☝️but before that, I'll post the requested fic(most probably it'll be an oneshot) 💗👀

REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED <333

[bugboysgf]

Hate + Love

Chapter 2

series masterlist

Previous chapter

Summary: There is a thin line between love and hate but what if it's way thinner than you thought?

“Hi, im suppose to be tutoring somebody.” you told the lady at the front desk. The last 2 weeks had been stressful but out of extreme luck you managed to get all A’s but that also meant you had to tutor the people that were not doing so well in school.

“Oh yes, you must be Y/n.”

“I am.” you confirmed.

“Min Ho.” The lady calls his name and he jumps out of his seat.

“You gotta be kidding me.” you look at Min ho and he seems just as surprised as you are. “There has to be some sort of mistake, I can't tutor him.” the lady looks at her computer for a second and looks back at you.

“Sorry but there is a specific note from the teacher saying you can't switch.”

“What? Who wrote that.” you asked.

“It was your math teacher. Take a seat and get started.”

“I can't believe this.” you said sitting down.

“Do you think I want to do this? I have no choice.” Min ho rolled his eyes.

“Whatever can we just get started.”

After two hours tutoring you were done but to you i feel like 5 hours because every 10 minutes you and Min ho were arguing about something different.

“Thank you.” Min Ho says. You look at him in shock, you were never expecting those words to come out of his mouth.

“You have manners, I see. Can I get an apology too?” you asked hopefully.

“It happened almost 3 weeks ago, get over it.”

“God you're such a bitch.”

“Takes one to know one.”

—-

“We have Alex next.” Kitty said. “Oh my god we still have to walk up the stairs.” you said, you were tired already and it was only your 2 period.

“Do you want to go to a ramen place after the 5th period?” Kitty asked.

“Im Pretty sure I don't have to tutor today, so yes.”

“How is it? By the way, you are still not getting along.”

“Nope now i have to sit with him in alex class, because he wont let me change seats.” you rolled your eyes.

“Dude you have 4 months left until winter break, at least try to stop hating each other.”

“He's the problem, not me, he won't apologize. He said thank you yesterday when i tutored him but that's it.” you explained to Kitty. You honestly don't think that you and Minho would get along every chance he gets to make fun of you. He's gonna take it and you're tired of it.

“The problem is that you are both stubborn.” Kitty grabs the handle of the door and lets you into the class, she gives you a ‘be nice look’ and takes a seat.

You walked over to your seat and to your surprise Min Ho was already sitting down, he was always late. You take a seat and don't say a word to him.

“No greeting?” he asked

“What do you want?” you say in a cold tone.

“Woah, somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.” he smirks.

“I just don't have time for your bullshit today.”

Lucky Alex didn't have you guys do anything with your partner work today you didnt think you could handle it anyways.

You grabbed your things and stuffed them into your backpack.

“y/n?” you stopped in your tracks and looked at the guy that called your name. Minho also stopped and looks at him.

“Yes?” you look at him confused. You've never seen this guy in your life and you had no idea why he was talking to you.

“I'm Derek, I was just trying to see if i can get your number.” you look around to see if anybody was watching and behind him were his friends waiting to see your next move. You didn't want to seem stuck up or anything, so you just smiled and typed your number into his phone.

“Great, I'll text you.”

“Cool” you watch him walk away and turn to Min ho. “And why did you stay?”

“What does he want with you?” “What do you mean?”you asked, confused.

“His dad is literally a millionaire.”

“I honestly dont give two fuck about that.” you said.

“It had to be a dare.” Min ho shook his head.

“Oh really? Just because an attractive guy asked for my number that means it has to be a dare?” you said offended. Min ho knew he messed up, he always jokes around but he knew that what he said really affected you.

“That's not-”

“Save it.” you walked away.

—

For the next few weeks you continue talking to Derek, you thought he would be a jerk but turns out he wasn't. He was really nice and listened.

“Where are you going?” Min ho asked Q. “Oh the nature club is having a hike today.” Q said, putting on his shoes.

“Great i'll come” Min ho got up from the couch. “You can't.” Q said.

“Why?” “Club members only.” “Dude i went last time.” Q stayed silent and didn't say anything. “Unless you don't want me to go for some reason?” “It's not that I don't want you to go, it's just that y/n and Derek are going to be there and I don't want you messing it up for her. She told me what you said when he asked for her number.” Q confessed.

“That's not what I meant, I tried to tell her that.”

“You should have said it in the first place, are you jealous or something?” Q asked.

“What no… no”

“Yup that sounds so convincing.”

“I don't like her, I hate her.”

“You know, you can hate and love somebody at the same time.” Q said shutting the door.

Min ho stood there thinking there's no way that he loves y/n? He hates her too much.

[mimi-cee-genshin]

Denial is Futile: Wanderer x f!reader - Chapter 5

Read on AO3 | Series Masterlist | Taglist

« Chapter 1 | < Chapter 4

Summary:

What would you do if you were stuck with Wanderer indefinitely?

The cute and sweet guy from the bazaar was brought to your place while unconscious. But when he woke up, you were appalled by the amount of snark he had. Was he even the same person? And now you were stuck with him because he could literally die if he stopped holding your hand. You weren't sure if you could tolerate him any longer. Little did you know he was exactly the type of person you needed in your life.

Other info: Fluff, humor, sfw, enemies to lovers, some hurt/comfort and angst later, character growth, occurs after the version 3.3 Archon quest and Tighnari's story quest, female reader

Word count: 2.8k

*****

"She seems okay," Baizhu informed Nahida. "Her heart rate is on the low side, but it's still within the normal range."

Wanderer watched your eyes; they were avoiding Baizhu's as well. Now that made the three of them if he included himself and Nahida. Your behavior ever since you regained consciousness was strange to say the least.

When you first woke up, you didn't get up. You laid there lifeless with no will left in your body. Your eyes were open, but your hand laid limp in his. He didn't think much of it at first. It wasn't strange for a weak human like you who had recently gained consciousness, so he chided at you about something like the weather as if you were fine.

And then you smiled.

You claimed you were surprised he was still there, all while staring at the wall behind him. It was as if making eye contact with him would cause you harm. He was faced with a blank mask displaying nothing but the outline of a smile.

"You're lucky Baizhu was here in Sumeru City," said Changsheng. "It seems we have to reschedule our meeting with Tighnari."

"Sorry," you replied. Your smile didn't reach your eyes and you didn't look at her either. Your attempt at feigning happiness was rather pathetic. Still, Baizhu continued with your assessment.

"I am limited in the range of tests I can perform," he said. "They may cause unintended side effects considering your current situation with Wanderer. From what I can tell, further testing would be unnecessary."

"Thank you, Baizhu," you told him, avoiding his gaze as well. "I guess this is all we can do for now."

Just how long were you going to act like this? As Baizhu listed some precautionary measures for you to follow, you stared down and fiddled with the blanket.

Wanderer grabbed your chin and turned your face towards him.

Whack.

"What do you think you're doing?" you said after slapping his hand away.

You glared at him. Perfect.

"Weren't you taught to look at the person you're talking to?" he asked you.

"What?"

"It's rude."

"You're one to talk," you said.

"Hmph."

"You literally yanked my face just to make me look at you."

"Do you even notice how you were acting just now? I guess you're even more dim-witted than I thought."

"Ugh! You–"

"All right. That's quite enough, you two," Baizhu said. "Wanderer, you shouldn't be agitating a patient. Especially not one you're dependent on."

"Hmph." At least you were human again. Maybe now you'd return to the task at hand: finding a way to sever himself from you.

"Before you forget," Changsheng told Baizhu, "there was one more observation you've forgotten to mention, wasn't there?"

"Ah yes." Baizhu turned to you. "The energy around your heart is a little peculiar. Unfortunately, I cannot ascertain if you were born with this condition or if it's due to your current situation with Wanderer. It's also possible that it's caused by some other unknown factor."

Your heart? Wanderer certainly didn't expect this. You were an ordinary human being in his eyes, but perhaps this was why you had the ability to keep him conscious.

"Have you ever experienced symptoms such as these before?" asked Baizhu. "Fainting spells, palpitations... or perhaps extreme fatigue?"

"I don't think I have." You scratched your head. "I'm fairly healthy and something like this hasn't –Wait a moment…"

You rose to your feet and reached for the projector, pulling Wanderer along in the process.

"What do you think you're doing?" Wanderer raised his brow. The projector lit up the wall once again.

"Shhh! I need to find it."

"You're shushing me?"

"Could you just be quiet?" you said, already in the middle of scanning through his memories. "I'm going to lose this thought because of you."

You fast forwarded his time at Tatarasuna with a glimpse of the furnace from the projector. Then you continued all the way to the time he met The Doctor before rewinding again.

"So what exactly are you looking for?" he asked.

"Something in Inazuma. Something… looked familiar," you said. "It was pink. Maybe leaves?"

"There are sakura trees everywhere in Inazuma," he noted, rolling his eyes. "Are you seriously trying to find something with that tiny piece of information?"

"Well… I think I remember red buildings too."

The projector revealed the time when he arrived at the shores of Inazuma City after withstanding the storm. He sighed. His past search for help to save the people of Tatarasuna was a waste of time.

In the images, Kabukimono traveled to the Tenshukaku and arrived at the gate, pleading to speak with the Almighty Shogun. You rewinded and played this scene several times.

"I've… I've been here before," you said, squinting your eyes at the projected image. "Where is this?"

"Weren't you just talking about red buildings?" asked Wanderer.

"Could you just answer the question?" you said, glaring at him.

He sighed. "This is on Narukami Island. More specifically, this is the Tenshukaku in Inazuma City."

"What?" you said. "But I've never been to the city before."

"Aren't you an Inazuman?"

"Yes... I can't believe you assumed every Inazuman has been to the city."

Wanderer let out a sigh. "Always picking a fight I see. It was a simple question. Why are you so offended?"

"I see that those two have quite the temperament," said Baizhu.

"Indeed," replied Nahida.

The scene continued as Kabukimono waited for days in the rain. Footsteps rushed towards him and a pink umbrella reached over. At this point, he had given up hope.

"Wait!" you exclaimed, pointing to Yae Miko on the screen. "I know her!"

"What?"

"A tree…" you muttered to yourself. "In front of a large tree, she was talking to my b-brother..."

You lowered your eyes and bit your lip. Your shoulders went stiff as well. Yet, you held yourself together with whatever was going through your mind and continued your explanation.

"I… uh, I don't remember much else," you said, pausing to clear your throat. "I think I struggled to stay conscious when I was there for some reason. And there was a weird bitter taste in my mouth afterwards."

"I see," replied Baizhu. "So being unconscious reminded you of this memory?"

"But I haven't passed out like this in a long time," you added. "It actually happened regularly when I was a child. And it... just stopped one day I guess."

Baizhu placed a hand on his chin. "Hmm… It seems to me that the bitter taste may have been from an herbal remedy known to treat certain diseases," he said. "My patients often complain about it due to its distinct and unpleasant taste. It's a sort of antibiotic with a wide range of applications. It's even taken for post-operative situations."

"I see…" Nahida pondered to herself. "This is a bit unrelated, but didn't Tighnari mention that one of Wanderer's organs is failing? Or at least, that was his theory. Maybe he needs a replacement part."

"Hmph," said Wanderer. "If I need a replacement part, it means I should go see the woman who created me." He let out a sigh. "Unfortunately, going back to Inazuma isn't exactly on the top of my list of things to do. It's not like she would remember me anyway. I'd rather keep it that way."

"But visiting the Electro Archon seems like the next logical step," said Nahida. "Or maybe the two of you could go to the Grand Narukami Shrine to see if Yae Miko can help find a solution."

"So we show up at the shrine on one fine sunny day and then what?" said Wanderer. "She's not the type to bend over backwards when a random person shows up with a request."

"You never know unless you try," replied Nahida.

"Neither of them remember me nor would they care to help someone in need. We'll find a different way."

"Well… since you're not the only one who'll be affected by this decision, why don't we ask Y/n?" suggested Nahida.

Now that Wanderer's attention turned to you, he noticed you'd gone silent again. Your eyes were lowered and your grip around his hand was firmer than usual.

"I want nothing to do with the Electro Archon," you said.

*****

The sun found a crack in the roof to shine through, just so it could find your eyes in the morning. Turning over on the bed, you saw Wanderer sitting with crossed legs on the floor, awake as ever. It would've startled you if you weren't used to it by now.

"Don't you ever get bored like that?" you asked.

"Hmph. Humans just have such short attention spans."

"Good morning to you too," you said dryly.

Neither of you said a word about Inazuma ever since that meeting. Why would you when that Archon had caused so much misery? You never understood why your brother was grateful to her.

You and Wanderer had an unspoken agreement: you'd focus on your lead with Tighnari instead. You didn't care much about Wanderer's reasons for avoiding the Archon, but if he was on the same page as you, that was all that mattered.

"Your hair is a mess," Wanderer commented.

"You think I didn't know that," you replied, rolling your eyes. "You tell me every morning."

You didn't bother fixing it and, instead, walked to your desk to scan your calendar. Collei was coming back to Sumeru, likely even here already. Unfortunately, this meant you'd be sleeping on the floor again, but it was by choice. You couldn't bear the thought of using the bed at her expense even if she wouldn't care.

You picked up the extra sleeping bag Tighnari left for you and held it out to Wanderer.

He raised his brow before rolling his eyes and helping you lay down the bag.

That was when something caught your eye. A soft, round object, which looked like a face and hair had been sewn onto it, laid on the floor under Wanderer's blanket. You picked it up and saw it was a small doll that was slightly larger than your hand.

Wanderer snatched it from you.

"Is it yours?" you asked.

"Whose would it be then?" he said.

"Was it a gift?"

"No."

"Then did you make it?"

He didn't give you an answer, only a huff as he placed it in his pocket. So Nilou wasn't just being nice when she complimented him on his needlework. You didn't expect he had a talent for that.

After fixing your hair, you unzipped your bag and placed a few notebooks and pens inside. Tighnari said he wanted us to meet him in Pardis Dhyai today. He got a hold of someone who might be able to help us.

Then we wouldn't have to go to Inazuma.

You were glad that Wanderer wasn't thrilled about the idea either, although after learning about his past made you realize you misunderstood him. You thought it was a reasonable conclusion that his vision caused the change in his personality. How were you supposed to know he had lost and gotten back his memories?

So which one was his real personality?

"Why are you staring at me?" he asked as the two of you walked towards Pardis Dhyai.

"You really don't do small talk," you commented. He was silent this entire time.

"Well, there's really no point to it, is there?" he said.

"It's a way for people to get to know each other," you said.

"What? Are you interested in me now?"

You placed your hand on your forehead. You couldn't believe you had a crush on him at one point. "Where the heck did you get that idea–"

A scream came from the forest.

"C- Collei?"

A drop of sweat formed on your brow. It couldn't be her, could it? With her skills and experience, nothing fazed her in the forest. Not usually at least.

"It did sound familiar," mentioned Wanderer.

"You know her?" you asked.

His lips turned into a scowl. "Does that even matter right now when we know that–"

"Don't touch me!"

Collei!

Your legs picked up speed and raced toward the forest. Wanderer tugged you hard by your arm and swung you onto his back.

"Grab on," he said, activating his vision and floating in the air.

He flew through the forest at full speed as you clung onto his neck. The wind pushed your hair back as he maneuvered around several trees and branches.

A forest ranger was trapped under a fallen trunk while an Electro Fatui skirmisher held onto Collei's arm. She couldn't escape his grasp.

Wanderer released his skill and fell like a meteor to kick down the skirmisher's head at an angle. This launched the three of you several feet away from the fallen tree trunk as a puff of dust surrounded you.

"Collei!" you yelled out, climbing off of Wanderer's back. "Are you okay?" You couldn't see her with all the debris in the air.

"Y/n?" asked Collei with a quiver in her voice. "H-how are you–"

"Have a load of this!"

A bullet came towards Wanderer and you pulled him aside and stretched out your hand in front. It just missed your hand, but its fire burned your arm. You pulled it back in pain and clicked your tongue for relying on that 'curse' once again.

"Why would you do that?" Wanderer yelled at you. "Are you eager for a death wish?"

The debris settled and the Pyro Fatui skirmisher took aim once more, but Collei's blazing green arrow shot him first.

"Ugh. Humans are such feeble creatures," Wanderer continued to scold you. "You're no better than insects."

"Hey!" the forest ranger called out to him. "Bring her here." A bubble of water formed above his hand as he laid on the ground.

Wanderer carried you over before launching the tree off of him. He stretched out his arm, ready for another attack.

The forest ranger cooled your arm with the water and soothed the burn that stretched from your wrist to your elbow. So this was what a burn felt like. Yet you could tell it was only skin deep.

"Let's end this quickly!" said the Electrohammer skirmisher.

He wasn't knocked out yet?

Collei dodged his attack, launched herself off a low hanging branch and shot his weak point.

The Pyro Fatui aimed at her again.

"Forget my arm," you said, climbing onto Wanderer's back. "We have to help her!"

He flew towards the gunner and struck him with his wind blades. He continued to fight them with Collei providing cover from a distance.

It was strange. Others were doing the fighting for you as you clung onto Wanderer's back. Yet though you were defenseless, you weren't not dismayed.

The Fatui were now subdued and tied up. Collei took a look at your arm and verified it was a first degree burn but you would still need more aid.

"I'm sorry I let this happen to you," she told you. "I wasn't able to hold my bow steady at first because I… I was a bit shaken up."

This was the girl who was fearless against creatures multiple times her size. You couldn't blame her for getting scared this one time.

"I… wanted to be able to protect everyone," said Collei. "I'll work harder next time."

"There's no need to push yourself," said Wanderer. "It isn't exactly lucky for you to have a run-in with the Fatui." He took a sigh that held a measure of heaviness with it.

The more you observed Wanderer, the more caring he seemed. You were previously blinded by your anger and projected your past onto him. He was still rather rude and abrasive, especially when provoked. But glimpses of the guy you saw when you first met were still there.

"I'll take him with me back to Gandharva Ville," Collei said as she placed the forest ranger's arm over her shoulder. "It'll be easier to treat him there."

"Alright," you said. "We'll stay here until you get someone to help deal with them. Although, I think now we're late for our meeting with Tighnari in Pardis Dhyai.

"I see," she said. "In that case, we'll go there instead to update him on the situation."

After Collei left with the limping forest ranger, Wanderer squeezed hard on your uninjured hand.

"Ow! What the heck are you doing?"

"Sit," he commanded with his eyes glaring at you.

You heeded his word and promptly sat down on the ground. He took the bandages from the first aid pack that Collei left and loosely wrapped them around your burn.

Your heart skipped a beat.

Your eyes widened, your breath hitched and you placed a hand on your chest. The feeling in your gut told you that something was terribly wrong.

Yet, you pretended like it never happened.

*****

Thanks for reading! Here's Chapter 6 >

[stonesylove]

Summary: Alessandra and Tom met on a casual night out in Berlin while he's filming the prequel of the hunger games, both of them are down for a little three month affair but what if they want a little bit more.

social media au

A night out in Berlin pt.2

Our first conversation

Chapter 1 - Chapter 3

Alessandra woke up and as normal 22 year old, took her phone to check her social media after one of the best nights out she ever had, she remembered some parts of the night but the others felt like a distant memory; she opened up Instagram to see and she had a new verified follower, someone called “Tom Blyth” she knew a lot of Tom’s but not a single one was famous so when Alessandra touch his profile pic and went to his profile she got hit whit the memory of the tall man with a buzz cut, she couldn’t believe that she fooled around with an actor in a random club in a night out.

“GIULIANA COME HERE” she screamed calling her best friend to tell her the crazy news, Giuliana and Alessandra have been best friend since they were 3 years old, they met in a little ballet academy in Naples, both have dreamed of dancing around the world and they ended up living together in Berlin and dancing for Staatsballett; Alessandra heard the steps coming closer and then she saw her door being open by her friend.

“Girl it’s 8 am, stop screaming” Giuliana said, “shut up and listen to me, remember last night when I got lost from you guys?” Alessandra asked thrilled to tell the whole story, her friend nodded so she can continue with the story, “Well I ended up dancing and making out with this cute tall man and I guess at some point I had to tell him my ig because now he’s following me” she said.

“I don’t see what’s the issue here” Giuliana said with a confused look, “HES A FUCKING BRITISH ACTOR” Alessandra screamed excited while her best friend was in completely shock, “you need to post a thirst trap right now” Giuli said with a playful look in her face, “I’m going to follow him up first and maybe I’ll post it later, I don’t know this is fucking wild” Alessandra said while opening up Instagram again to follow Tom.

Alessandra kept her day going without stressing too much about the topic, she knew he must be busy working on Germany or maybe he’s traveling with some friends so she wouldn’t want to distract him with a text but maybe it was a good idea to post a little selfie on her stories just to taste the waters.

Alessandra Di Maggio posted a story

Alessandra was walking with her friends to her class while she posted a pic she took some days ago that she felt would be cute enough to draw his attention, she felt like a little girl waiting for her crush to give her some attention and that made her feel so stupid because Alessandra knew that an actor would never lay his eyes on her and all that happened was just a drunken mistake, she locked her phone deciding she wouldn’t check Instagram for the day, Alessandra just didn’t want to get all in her head and get distracted during what’s really important.

The class was a success, she felt tired but at the same time she knew she had to be the best to get to the point she wants to be; Alessandra picked up her belongings and the walked out of the door waiting for her best friend to catch her up.

“So, have you checked Instagram? Did he even liked the story? Did he answered?” Giuliana said while catching Alessandra outside of the dance studio, “I literally posted and blocked my phone, I haven’t check it out” she said while trying to sound uninterested, “WELL DO IT BITCH“ her friend said while rising her voice. Alessandra took her phone out of her bag, she saw that she had a couple notifications but nothing special so she opened up Instagram to see that he liked her story and he sent a message.

Tom Blyth sent you a message 

Tom Blyth

Good morning Alessa with 4 s

Alessandra couldn’t believe that he send her a message, it was crazy for her because they were a little too drunk and she thought he wouldn’t remember her and also the way she screamed her Instagram handle, “Giuli he messaged me” Alessandra said a little bit shocked because she thought it meant nothing for him, “REPLY RIGHT NOW” Giuliana screamed.

Alessandra Di Maggio

hi Tom boy, thought you forgot about me

She send the message and block her phone again, Alessandra couldn’t believe she was doing that, texting him was a crazy scenario in her head, that type of stuff never happen to people like her so she wouldn’t keep any high hopes. Alessandra and Giuliana decided to grab dinner outside because contrary to popular believe ballerinas usually ate a lot; when they arrived home Alessandra didn’t check her phone since she replied the message and she wasn’t ready to do that yet, so she went to the bathroom took a long shower, got ready for bed and still was too scared to check it out. Alessandra laid down in her bed, she thought about going to sleep without checking her phone but the curiosity was eating her alive, so she took her phone out and opened Instagram.

Tom Blyth sent you a message 

Tom Blyth 

I would never forget about you Ale 😂

How are you? You never told me you were ballerina!!

Alessandra Di Maggio

are you a millennial?? What’s up with that emoji 💀

well you never told me that you were an actor so we are even 

Tom Blyth 

Being a millennial is okay, I’m a proud millennial 

How old are you?

if you don’t mind me asking 

Alessandra Di Maggio

I’m 22 and you Tom boy?

gonna be honest I was stalking your profile and I want to say that I don’t agree about riding horses but I’m 100% down to ride the cowboy

Tom Blyth 

I’m 27, so you’re an iPad kid???

You gotta be a little bit more creative if that’s the way you flirt but you don’t look bad in those leotards and thighs 

Alessandra Di Maggio

so you’re a grandpa???

I had to make the joke Tom, it was funny to me 🙄🙄🙄

Tom Blyth 

What if we play 21 questions so we can make other type of jokes funny girl 

Alessandra Di Maggio

did you google that??

but sure 

were where you born?

Tom Blyth 

You’re way too funny 🙄🙄

I’m from Birmingham and you?

What’s your fav color?

Alessandra Di Maggio

I’m from Naples, best part of Italy 

such a deep question 

light blue and yours ?

Tom Blyth 

Like the color of my eyes?

Dark purple, I think so 

What’s up with the caption on your la post??

Alessandra Di Maggio

That counts as one of your questions

A little bit lighter than yours British boy

It’s from a song called “JESUS IN BERLIN”

Are you here for pleasure or for work?

Tom Blyth 

I’m working on a Movie, i’ll be here for three months 

Are you a professional ballerina or is just a hobbie?

Alessandra Di Maggio

let’s hope your big movie doesn’t make a chaos in the city 

I’m a professional ballet dancer

okay, now we’re getting into the deeper questions 

Tom Blyth 

I can go deeper if you want funny girl 😏

They talked until like three in the morning until Alessandra felt asleep, both of them couldn’t believe how the conversation was flowing like they known each other for a while also but of them have the same sense of humor so it’s makes everything a little bit easier to get to know each other, Alessandra wasn’t sure if all the dirty jokes were real and he wanted all that but she wouldn’t mind a three month affair with an English boy, at the end they might never see each other again.

Tom Blyth posted a story 

This is what her if ig looks like 

[ask-the-critters-survival-au]

So anybody feeling rather nosy today?

Well I finished Kickin’s entire diary a few weeks ago, and since Hoppy never really got the chance to read the entire thing, I thought I’d share it here!

Please note, on the following dates

November 4, 1997

March 10, 1998

September 4, 1998

Kickin does write down some s*icidal thoughts, that may be triggering to some people. I’d advise you to skip past those if they are triggering for you. I’ll mark them with bold text so you know.

Diary is under the cut! Have fun snooping!

August 26, 1995

I found this notebook by one of the kids’ beds. He didn’t use it at all so I figured it was alright to take it! Not that he is here to stop me anyways. I decided to start writing stuff in here! Just whatever I’m thinking, whenever I feel like it, I guess. Whenever I feel like it. God, that is a WEIRD sentence to say. Or write. But it’s true! It’s my life now! Whenever I feel like it! No more stupid employees here! Haha, get wrecked! Losers. Oh, Hoppy’s calling me. I’m gonna go! I’ll write in you again later! I promise! Wait, why am I promising a notebook that I’ll do something?

October 2, 1995

Okay so I kinda forgot about this thing. Oops! Anyways, I’m getting bored. The soccer ball is starting to deflate and we can’t find the pump. This SUCKS dude. Like, I get the prototype is busy doing whatever, but if he’s all powerful like he says can’t he give us some entertainment around here? Like sheesh! There’s nothing to do. I’m so bored.

October 16, 1995

I’m thinking of growing my hair out. I mean, Crafty is doing it! And it’s getting annoying constantly cutting it. It grows back really fast. Maybe I’ll go for a mullet type look! Just maybe though.

October 29, 1995

DogDay’s missing. We don’t know where he went. We tried searching for him but CatNap told us not to. It’s always what CatNap says. Stupid. I’m going to keep looking anyways. I’m gonna find him.

October 30, 1995

Never mind.

January 1, 1996

Hey, new year! It kinda sucks though. We did absolutely nothing to celebrate. Also, big problem. Bobby found out about my secret crush. Oh I hope nobody ever reads this thing. Don’t tell anybody, but I think I like-like Hoppy. She’s just so cute and pretty and funny and spunky and cool and I love it when she talks about outer space it’s so interesting!!! She’s so fast too, like crazy fast! I think she’s too fast though. She beats me at literally EVERYTHING. That’s okay though! I’m gonna keep getting better until I can win! But yeah. Bobby found out. I’m terrified for my life.

January 23 1996

So we’re starting to run out of food. Catnap said to trust in the prototype and that he’s gonna save us and stuff. I call bull. We need food, not a savior! But he said the prototype has a plan, so I guess we’ll be fine. Still though, I’m getting tired of eating moldy salami.

February 6, 1996

Crafty’s starting to lose it. She started nagging me nonstop because she keeps running out of red marker. I’m gonna avoid her from now on. Her drawings are getting weird. Really weird. Like borderline creepy stuff. She’s going bonkers man, I’m telling you.

May 16, 1996

We ran out of food. Woke up this morning to Picky scoring through the rest of our god damn supply. I swear I am going to SCREAM DUDE!! So what if she’s always hungry?! She’s not the only one who needs food to survive! Unbelievable. What the hell are we going to do now?

May 17, 1996

So that was CatNap’s back up plan. Oh my god. I don’t want to even think about what I’ve done today. I recognized him. Who I ate. He was there when I first woke up. Taking notes in the corner of the room on his clipboard. I feel sick to my stomach. How long are we going to have to do this for?

June 2, 1996

Today feels special. I don’t know why. It just does. Also I’m sorry I haven’t been writing in you as much. I’m just scared of getting caught writing in this thing. What if someone reads it? What if CatNap reads it? Will he get mad at me for what I wrote a few months ago about the prototype? Maybe I should erase it. No I can’t do that, I wrote it in marker. I’m going to keep this thing hidden inside my zipper pocket for now, until I find a better spot.

July 22, 1996

There was a freaking execution today. I’m so disturbed right now. It was one of the tiny DogDays. I’m not really sure what he did, but CatNap made us all watch as he ripped the poor guy apart. He said that’s what happens if you are a heretic. That’s what happens if you speak out even the slightest against the prototype. Bubba told me that he thought one of the other minis had tattled to CatNap about what that tiny DogDay did. That’s insane. I can’t imagine any of my friends doing that to me. Would they do that to me? No, I’m being an idiot. They’d never do that. Regardless I can’t let him find this thing. I don’t want to end up like that mini.

August 8, 1996

It’s officially been a full year since the Hour of Joy. It’s weird to think about. How many full humans have I eaten by now? Maybe eight? Ten? Twelve? Twenty? I lose count. I don’t feel anything when I eat them anymore. It’s easier to imagine them without faces. I always cut off the head so I don’t have to see it. On the bright side, we finally found the pump for the soccer ball. Hoppy and I can finally start playing again. I don’t really think either of us want to though. At least not right now.

September 12, 1996

Hoppy and I had another fight today. I’m writing in this thing because Bobby made us separate. I don’t like being mad at her. I want to apologize but I’m scared to approach her right now. I miss DogDay. I don’t write about him much but I miss him. His name is kind of forbidden to even speak nowadays. Picky thinks he abandoned us. I don’t think he did. He’d never do that. But if he did I want him to come back. Everything’s falling apart without him.

January 12, 1997

I’m sorry it’s been awhile. I don’t really know what to write about today though so I’m gonna end it off here.

February 7, 1997

Sometimes I wonder if I should name this journal something. But I’m not very creative when it comes to names. Crafty is though. She’s been really different lately though. She’s gotten really cheerful for some reason. But say the wrong thing and suddenly you’re on the ground. I’m scared of her. I don’t know what’s going on with her but if she doesn’t get that fixed soon she’s going to get herself killed. Or kill someone else. Either of the two. Maybe even both.

April 25, 1997

Nothing to write about today. I’m just not going to. I don’t feel like it. My hand hurts. I think I’m gonna go back to sleep.

June 2, 1997

It’s the weird day again. The one that feels like it should be special. I don’t know what that feeling is. I asked Bubba about it. He knows a lot, I thought he’d probably know that too. He didn’t though. He said he got that feeling too, sometimes. But neither of us knew why.

June 19, 1997

We ran out of food. I didn’t even know that was possible. There were so many humans working in this factory, how did we run out of them? The entire Playcare was in panic today. CatNap calmed us all down. He said not to worry, because the prototype always has a plan. Okay. If the prototype always has a plan, what is it? Because I’m tired of this whole stupid mess! I want to know what it is! Why can’t I know what it is? This is so dumb! The prototype is so dumb! It makes me want to tear all my feathers out!!!!

September 19, 1997

IM SO HUNGRY SO HUNGRY SO HUNGRY SO HUNGRY I DONT KNOW WHAT TO EAT THERES NOTHING I HAVENT EATEN IN SO LONG I NEED FOOD I NEED FOOD. IM HAVING THESE SCARY THOUGHTS NOW I WANT THEM GONE! I DONT WANT TO HURT ANYONE BUT I NEED TO EAT I NEED TO EAT I NEED TO

September 19, 1997

I did it. I needed to eat. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Picky told us how to find food. There’s plenty of it in the Playhouse. Like livestock, just waiting to be slaughtered. CatNap was so mad. But we have food now. And we all know he’s been eating them too. I feel like a monster. They were like us. But Bubba told me it was necessary. We were all going to die if we didn’t. I’m still sorry though.

November 4, 1997

Bubba got gassed. Badly. I’m so worried about him. We don’t even know why, we just walked in the room and there he was, laying on the ground with scratch marks all over him. How could CatNap have done such a thing? He’s sick. Just sick. I’ve been taking care of him now. I don’t want to leave his side. I’m worried that if I leave for a moment that something will happen to him. Hoppy’s been making me stay active. Sometimes she’s the only reason I keep going on. It’d be so easy just to end it all. She’s there for me though. I love her. God, I love her. I never want anything to happen to her. But I know something’s going to happen to her. That something’s going to happen to all of us eventually. When it happens to her though, it’s gonna happen to me next. I promise it will.

November 14, 1997

I found a boombox today. It’s really cool. I’ve been playing it for Bubba recently. He’s still asleep. I hope he wakes up soon. Did I ever mention in here that I like to dance? It’s really fun. It makes me forget about everything that happened. I lose myself in the movements. I don’t really even know how I know how to dance. I never learned it as a toy. I think I’m gonna go do it now though.

December 3, 1997

THAT JERK! THAT HORRIBLE STUPID DISGUSTING DUMB JERK! I HATE HER! I HATE HER I HATE HER I HATE HER! HOW DARE SHE DO THAT TO BUBBA?? WHEN HAS HE EVER BEEN ANYTHING BUT NICE TO HER???? BUT NOOOOO, I GUESS KINDNESS MEANS NOTHING IN THE EYES OF PICKY PIGGY! ALL SHE CARES ABOUT IS HERSELF AND HER APPETITE! I WOULDVE RIPPED OFF SOOO MUCH MORE THAN HER EAR IF I COULD! BUT THEN HOPPY AND BOBBY HAD TO COME IN AND RESTRAIN ME! STUPID! STUPID STUPID STUPID! IM GOING TO KILL HER WHEN I GET THE CHANCE! AND ITS GOING TO BE SLOW AND BRUTAL AND ITS GOING TO HURT!

January 1, 1998

Yay. New year. Yippee.

March 4, 1998

Something bad happened today. I knew it would happen eventually. I think we all did. Crafty finally lost it on the wrong person. She attacked CatNap and then he ripped off her hands as punishment. I could hear every. Single. Agonizing second of her screams. I thought I was used to screaming by now. I guess I was just telling myself that. I hope she survives. That was a lot of blood.

March 6, 1998

What do I do. What do I do. What do I do. Hoppy’s leaving. She just told me she is. Hoppy, Bobby and Crafty are leaving Playcare in a week. They can’t leave. They can’t. CatNap’s going to kill them. He’s going to kill them brutally. And even if he doesn’t, who knows what’s outside of Playcare? Plenty of toys who would be willing to hurt them for food. Hoppy told me to come with them. I can’t go with them. I don’t want to die. But I don’t want them to die. They can’t leave. I don’t want them to leave. But I can’t change Hoppy’s mind. She’s leaving with or without me. How could she do that to me? Just leave me here, all alone with Picky? Bubba’s still asleep. She’s the only one I’ll have to talk to. I don’t want to talk to her. I’m scared. I need to stop them.

March 8, 1998

what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done what have I done

March 9, 1998

I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m so so sorry. I messed up I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry please forgive me. I keep seeing her. She talks to me in my head now, telling me she won’t ever forgive me, no matter how much I grovel and beg. Sometimes I don’t even think it’s in my head. Am I going insane? You don’t deserve to stay sane. You’re right. I don’t. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.

March 10, 1998

The blood won’t come off. It stained my hands. Maybe I deserve that. You do deserve that. You’re right. You’re always right. I deserve it. I haven’t moved from my bed since it happened. I’m hungry but I don’t want to eat. I don’t deserve to eat. Bubba needs me though. At least if Picky tries eating him again there’s nobody to stop me from making her pay this time. I don’t know why I don’t just give up. I should. I made a promise that I would once Hoppy went. Maybe it’s Bubba. Or maybe I’m just making excuses. Maybe I’m just too scared. I’ve never felt so alone before. I deserve to feel alone.

March 24, 1998

I’ve been seeing her a lot lately in my dreams. Always the screaming and then the ear. And then she tells me it’s my fault. I know it’s my fault. But I still don’t understand. Am I selfish for not understanding? Yeah. Probably. But all I ever wanted to do was protect her. I don’t understand why this happened. I don’t understand. Picky’s been avoiding me. That’s fine. I don’t want to see her either.

April 12, 1998

You know what? No. I’m done. I don’t care if CatNap catches me going into the Playhouse. I need to see what’s inside. Maybe she’s inside, and that’s why we aren’t allowed in. I’m going to find her. I’m going to make things right with her. I refuse to believe she’s gone.

July 16, 1998

July. It’s already July. I took that long to recover? Seriously? That was three whole months. Well, I guess loosing an eye will do that to you. I’m still surprised that Picky took care of me while I was hurt. I tried to ask her why but she didn’t respond, so I guess that was that. That doesn’t matter though. He’s alive. He’s alive. DogDay’s alive! He’s been here this entire time, sitting right below our noses and we had no clue! If I can just figure out a way to get him out then he can save us all from this mess! I know he can! I just need to find a way.

July 20, 1998

Bubba woke up. He finally woke up! Oh my god, he finally woke up! It’s been how long, eight months? I’m so thankful. He’s really scared though. He must’ve been through hell. I know from experience the nightmares that stuff gives you aren’t pleasant. I can’t imagine going through that for a whole year. Poor guy.

July 21, 1998

Bubba’s been having trouble walking lately. His legs give out whenever he tries. I guess that makes sense. He hasn’t used his legs in a while. I wish I knew how to give him the proper treatment he needs. Actually, there’s an idea. I should check inside of the school. I’m sure there is something in there about comas.

July 22, 1998

OKAY SO THAT WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA. Not only did I find absolutely NOTHING, but I almost got my head bashed in with a freaking mace! That biology teacher has gone wack. Completely wack. Then again, she’s not the only one. I still hear Hoppy. She still visits me. I’ll be in the middle of something and then I’ll just see her. I think I’m starting to hallucinate. I know that’s really bad. But I enjoy seeing her. Even if all she does is cuss me out. It gives me hope. Hope that she’s not Never mind. I shouldn’t be thinking about that. Bury that nice and deep along with the other scary thoughts. She’s not dead. She’s not dead she’s not dead she’s not dead she’s not dead.

August 8, 1998

Third year anniversary. Or is it the fourth? I don’t feel like doing the math. Bubba can walk again now, but all he does is sit against a wall. It feels like my effort was wasted, if I’m honest. He doesn’t like eating. Or sleeping. He hates sleeping. I tried to give him some books to read that I stole from the councilors office, but he ignored them. Some days he refuses to sleep so badly to the point where I have to knock him out for him to get a little shut eye. I feel bad for him. He doesn’t deserve this. If I could take his place I would in a heartbeat. Maybe if it was me instead of him I wouldn’t have messed up so horribly.

September 4, 1998

It’s one of those days where the hallucinations are bad again. Sometimes I wonder if it even is a hallucination. Am I actually seeing her? She’s looking over my shoulder right now. Watching me write. She looks so real. And the stuff she says feels so real. I want her to be real. I want to hold her in my arms. She just told me if I ever try to do that she’s going to push me off the cloud I’m on. I think she knows I wouldn’t save myself.

September 18, 1998

Bubba’s been getting better. He’s started talking again. Only sometimes though. And he never says much. It’s a start though.

November 10, 1998

I think I just saw Picky chasing Hoppy away from the councilors office. I must’ve just been hallucinating again. She was carrying something though. It looked like a computer? I’ve never seen that before. Probably just another hallucination.