#literally me and my girlfriend all the time

[symphonyofmars]

There was something I wanted to add as i saw people arguing back and forth (and this might be against my better judgement): but I believe the first post I saw referenced Bell Hooks, and then I later saw someone else say that the use of her quote was bullshit. The quote had to do with being compassionate towards men, and then the person responding said that wasn't what the quote is about (iirc, it's been a few days and my sense of time is not great) but having read The Will to Change (which I believe the quote was taken from), that's exactly what it was about.

[adding a read more because this became much longer than I intended it to be]

The book discusses how the patriarchy hurts not just women, but ALSO men, and how it's so much harder to rehabilitate men from it because: they think they stand something to gain from cramming themselves into the box they're supposed to fit into, and, many of them just have no idea that their life could even be different. That they could be an artist if they want to, they could dance if they want to, they could go into childcare if they want to or grow their hair long or write poetry or paint their nails-- that there are no "boy colors" and "girl colors", that there are no "men's jobs" and "women's jobs", that they could just do what they want because it makes them happy. They don't even know that being happy is more important than filling their sociological niche that someone else has carved out for them. It reminds me when I learned the story of Siddhartha Gautama when I was little, and that he had no idea that poverty, sickness, and suffering even existed because he had never been outside the palace walls and, not that I'm saying every man can achieve nirvana in an afternoon (or even in a lifetime), sometimes someone who knows what's outside the walls has to let you know that there is even something beyond the walls.

Which is also not to say that women need to be doing all the work for men. I spent ten years trying to disabuse a man of the "things he has to do to be manly" and it ended with him breaking up with me and joining a trad christian cult.

Some men (like my ex) are just extremely resistant to change because change is terrifying, but they also have this sense of Sunk Cost Fallacy, where if they were doing this thing the whole time and it's not working, then what were they wasting their time on?? (I feel like you see this with a lot of evangelical/trad Christians as well, where the idea that they might have been wrong is so scary that they double down on their beliefs in the hope that it will work out for them.)

But, there are also men like a book reviewer I was watching a few days ago (whose name I don't know), who admitted that he really had no idea women were catcalled as much as we say we are, until he was grocery shopping with his girlfriend and she went into the next aisle (literally like five feet away, just with the wall of food between them) and he heard a man catcall her. Like, the second she walked away from him and she no longer obviously belonged to him (in the mind of horrible men like her catcaller) she was suddenly fair game to be harassed in public. And he said that he never didn't believe his girlfriend, but to witness something makes it so much more real. To use my "wall" metaphor another way: he and so many men are still inside the palace, experiencing what they think is the same life others experience, while women are outside of the walls, struggling. The incident of hearing his girlfriend (who is an adult women and who shouldn't need him constantly around as protection from horrible men) being treated like an object while she's by herself was like someone grabbing his hand and pulling him outside the walls without even asking if he wanted to go, showing him a truth that can only be experienced by someone who is not him.

Back to Bell Hooks because there was something I wanted to add: yes she does say that it is at least partly the job of feminists to help to deprogram men. Men, as a group, have been brainwashed to think that they have to be The Provider, The Protector, The Leader, and not all of them are good at providing, protecting, or leading. Maybe some of them want to do the things I mentioned before like care for others (in the way we would describe as "maternal" and attribute to women), maybe they want to create art or do crafts or other things not considered "traditionally masculine", and that's not even taking into account that the "traditional idea" of a man is to be constantly wanting sex, and that men could never be sexually assaulted because they're in a constant state of wanting to fuck (obviously this is a lie; anyone can be sexually assaulted, and not everyone wants to fuck). You can't just take a dog who was taught only to fight and put it in a house of children, it won't know how to act around them and might attack them: it needs to be rehabilitated first.

And Bell Hooks does note, that the problem with trying to deprogram men comes from how they're raised. I'd like to submit this video about men and empathy, since I've already typed a bunch:

When I was reading The Will To Change and I got up to the part about her dad, I realized how different my dad is. And, because you don't get to choose your parents, I consider myself very lucky that my dad has always been unconditional in his love. For a moment I almost found this strange because his older brother was the "golden child" and his younger brother was "the baby", so he should have been somewhat neglected because they always got more affection from their parents, but I think it's because he was the favorite of his four girl cousins who would take him everywhere and fight over him (even now, he's the one they're excited to see and they shittalk the other two lol). So, I have a sneaking suspicion that the only reason he didn't end up shitty like his brothers, is because when he was a child he had four girls who were showing him what unconditional love was like and that you don't need to meet the criteria of your niche in order to receive love.

Which, I have to thank them for, because it's so much easier not having to decide whether or not I want to talk to my own parents as an adult because they've gone Fox News Insane. Both my parents will actually ask me about things they don't understand - like trans rights, queer rights in general, voting (I made them a paper of who/what to vote for for the election since the props always need extra research), geopolitical things - and I've even caught my dad making fun of conspiracy theorists and the thinking that trans women are ruining sports (he's a big sports guy and he mostly watches women's bball because he likes that they actually have to play as a team in a team sport). Life is a lot easier when both parents have empathy and don't have to be convinced to care about others.

And I think that's why the OG post I saw quoted Bell Hooks, because the "we need to rehabilitate men otherwise we can't have the feminist future we want" contingent of feminism never really took off; there was one-- I believe they were originally called "Meninists" as in "men who are feminists" and I've seen a picture of them from a parade in the 70s, but it died out because they were fighting such an uphill battle trying to convince other men to join. So now, we have more women who are independent and who have de-centered men from their lives, but also a bunch of men who were never rehabbed and who don't know their life doesn't need to revolve around "being a man." Being a man means being strong, it means being able to provide, it means being attractive; and the Tates and Fresh and Fits and all the other scam artists of the world sell them this on steroids: buy my book and you WILL be hot, you WILL be a millionaire, you WILL have women who want to fuck you...

Never mind that those guys are probably on actual steroids, they only have that money from scamming other men, and many of them have been found to hire escorts (which, there's nothing wrong with hiring sex workers, but there's a difference between selling the idea that you'll be so charismatic that women will throw themselves at you and having to hire a sex worker because your personality is so bad that no one wants to go near you.)

They're selling a false ideal to men who don't even know it's false in the first place.

But going back to Ms Hooks again: she did talk a great deal about how we need to raise our boys (as a society). She talks about how the whole thing of telling a nine-year old "Take care of your mother" is an insane notion, because he's nine and he can't do anything, and she's an adult woman who is actually the caretaker; and about how boy babies are treated so differently even to the point of "baby boys should not cry as much as baby girls". Like, the gender requirements are there before they can even talk, no wonder they're so damaged and hard to convince of anything later in life.

Reads with Rachel and her husband, Carlos, had two really good discussions about masculinity; one about real masculinity vs performed masculinity as they compared two books about being a man:

As Rachel says after Carlos complained about being made fun of for cleaning his nails after working on his car ("I work an office job and I have cleanliness standards"): "It's not enough for you to know how to work on a car, you also have to be dirty in order to be the manliest man."

The other is in the context of talking about how Patrick Rothfuss isn't the feminist he thinks he is because he still wants the women around him to perform femininity so he can perform masculinity and feel like "a big strong man" before going into a general discussion about masculinity (from about 9:01 to 53:55):

Together they ask a really good question (pardon me if I don't remember it verbatim): "Why does it take someone acting in a particular role for you to feel like a man?" And it's easier for Carlos to be able to deal with that question, because he started deconstructing from the patriarchy when he was 25 (he said he's 32 at the time of that video). It's something he and Rachel have done together as they learn and grow and live their lives together, him deconstructing from the patriarchy and her deconstructing from her fundamentalist christian upbringing (which is basically just The Patriarchy, but More, and +God.) And they've done this because they came to realize their upbringing was wrong, and they didn't want to raise their sons to be saddled with the same baggage that they both grew up with that made their lives worse.

So yeah, I forgot where I was going with this anymore since finding the one video took so long. The majority of men are resistant to changing their mind and it's because they were raised to be unemotional and not care about others but, sometimes, if maybe you've been friends with someone a while and take the time to explain something in a way they understand, you can change someone's mind. Story time:

I was a mod for a streamer for about a month and a half roundabouts January to February of this year (I ended up leaving because trying to get a bunch of randos to behave was stressful - esp since the streamer's rules weren't clear - and I ended up not really liking the streamer as a person). One person in the discord said that they hated the phrase "It's not my job to educate you" because it was condescending. I defended it as people being tired of having to explain shit to people just because they're black or trans or a woman but a bunch of people latched on and started saying anti-left things, which was weird because the streamer and his discord were supposed to be leftist (it's part of why I left, he was just weirdly antagonistic towards leftist ideals despite calling himself a leftist and he was attracting some *ahem* weird types). Anyway, a day goes by and a trans person comes in and says something like "I don't think I should have to explain my existence to random people on the street just because I decided to go outside," and a bunch of people descended on them, telling them they were wrong, and I'm pretty sure they ended up leaving the server.

[Like, the original group-agreed-upon argument came down to "I shouldn't have to google things or look up books to read or do my own work to discover anything new about the world, I should be able to demand of a random person's time and energy, even though I'm not giving off the vibe of someone who is actually ready to listen" and when I pointed out that people know when someone is and is not ready to listen, the streamer himself asked me how I knew and I was like like "do you think that I, a woman in her 30s, is somehow incapable of being able to discern intent?" Most women and queer folk KNOW who's a bad actor before they open their mouth, the idea that any of us wouldn't was just wildly ignorant.]

I complained to my friend (who I had met in the server) that the streamer was wrong and everyone's reaction was bullshit and, at first, he agreed with the position that a trans person should be prepared to debate people on their own rights if they deign to step outside their home. I countered with "You know, [streamer] doesn't it get it because he's a straight white man. He's the default. Other straight white men already know what it's like to be a straight white man so they have no questions for him. But to be trans or otherwise queer or a woman or any other person outside of a white man, is to have people question whether you have a right to be where you are. Trans women I've known have told me that they've had complete randos ask them if they've had bottom surgery and just-- how is that their business? People act so invasive towards non-straight non-white non-men in a way that no one does towards straight white men that they literally just can't understand what it's like to have your existence questioned just because you went outside. Asking a stranger if they've had bottom surgery is LITERALLY sexual harassment, and no one would ever walk up to someone like [streamer] and ask him like, "How big is your dick?" or something of a similar nature because that's just insane behavior, but when it's a trans person or a woman, it's suddenly okay? Like why do you think that is?" And my comparison to how white men are treated vs everyone else, and my stance that asking a stranger if they've had bottom surgery is sexual harassment (it is, no one needs to know about your genitalia) got through to him and he agreed with me. Awhile later I even heard him saying something similar to someone else about a situation that was similar and taking up the stance that I had given him.

So like... yeah, I probably wouldn't do that for a random man on the internet who is determined to hate me, but I can do it for a friend who I know might be receptive to what I have to say to him, and help steer him away from opinions that could end up dragging him down the wrong path.

As this post's OP said: "it's not saying you HAVE to do it! it's saying you CAN do it!"

It's up to you if you want to try effecting the people around you, but if they've dug in their heels that much then it's okay if you want to leave and not speak to them again. Just know that, it's only so hard for you because they were brainwashed since birth to think the way they think and that's REALLY hard to undo. And that's not a pass, that's just the reason why this is so fucking hard for the rest of us (when they're adults and harder to reason with because they're so invested) and also, the reason why mothers of sons need to maybe rethink how they're raising them. Like, don't raise them with "boy colors" and "girl colors" raise them with "colors." Dance isn't something a girl does, it's something a body does. Women don't cook because cooking is a woman's thing, people cook because they want to eat. And... I'll be honest, I've known a few women who are just so mean to their husbands in a "why can't you be a real man?" way, and I just DON'T see how that makes him want to be a better person, but then again, those woman probably need as much deprogramming as their husbands do since they just keep reinforcing something that (she may not even be aware) is hurting them both.

So yeah, sorry if this was a bit rambling, but seeing people fight back and forth for the past week and seeing people take up some really... Mad Max-ian, like, ultra-anarcho-capitalist positions of "we shouldn't help any man at all, fuck em!" was really weird when it was being said by people who purport themselves as being feminists when feminist ethics is supposed to be more compassionate. There were just a handful of reactions I saw that seemed very "pull yourself up out of the patriarchy by your bootstraps" but like... what if their boots don't have bootstraps? What if they don't even have shoes on? What if they don't even know they could have shoes?

posts about the alt-right pipeline being compassionate towards young men while radical leftists shun and shame them are not fucking saying "the men are becoming violent because feminists are too mean!" and if that is your takeaway you need to get off tumblr until you've better honed your critical thinking skills.

those posts are talking about how effective the language and approach you take in your activism can be. this is literally cult deprogramming 101. if someone is being taken in by a violent or dangerous group, that violent or dangerous group is usually offering them compassion and solace while working hard to convince them everyone else in the world is their enemy. you are under no obligation to coddle or act compassionate toward these men and their violent ideologies, but if you have the means to try, it is something that you can do to make a tangible difference.

radicalized people are often only one loving friend or family member or external voice away from being de-radicalized. of course that is not always the case, but it very often is. a lot of y'all rightfully understand that you do not carry the burden of being that voice, but a lot of y'all also have a lot of internalized ideas about morals and punitive justice and have simply written off these people as deserving of only the worst and not worth saving.

ten years ago, my grandmother was a fox news watching republican who voted red in every election and very well could have fallen down the qanon rabbit hole if not for me and her daughter challenging her compassionately, walking her through hypotheticals that validated her feelings & proving why they were false, & being patient with her despite our extreme division in political ideology. it was frustrating fucking work! but i decided i wanted to do it, because i could see the horizon and i could see me making a difference!

"misogynists have been saying feminists are too mean for years, get new material" that is not the fucking POINT. the point is that you, feminist, can be the compassionate voice that guides your brother, your father, your cousin, your grandfather away from fucking becoming or staying a nazi. you can show them compassion and companionship. you can be the woman they think of when their alt-right bros try to convince them that women are the enemy. and you can choose to crystallize that image of yourself so wholly in their mind's eye as worth protecting that they may very well choose to reject those harmful ideas.

it's not saying you HAVE to do it! it's saying you CAN do it! don't you 'firebomb a walmart' people all love taking change into your own hands? where the fuck is that energy right now, huh?

[iconchae]

꒰ ENHYPEN IN A SECRET RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR IDOL GIRLFRIEND >

pairing. bf ! enhypen × gf ! afab reader , genre. fluff , (chaez note. my first work and this possibly won't be really well written but I wanted to try.)

001. LEE HEESEUNG

Heeseung held back his breath as he knocked on your dorm door. It had been a hectic week for the boy, especially when every time he tried to see you he'd end up hiding from fans who recognised him even with a mask. When the door finally opened he basically threw his arms around you “i missed you so much!” he barely spoke the words before planting kisses all over your face. “i-i get it, you should get in before someone sees us together.” you suggested, a smile escaping you as you stared at the flower bouquet resting on the ground forgotten as your lover embraced you like he won't be letting go any sooner.

read the rest of the members below !

002. PARK JAY

Jay and you stood in the studio after everyone else left. Hell, everyone titled you as the “best friends” the fans, his members, the staff, manager, but the truth? You two were cuddled up in his room, pretending to be working on a song you two were supposed to finish by the end of this month. “what would you do if it got out?” you asked out of the blue, words laced with concern and fear. “you mean the relationship?” his hands tightened around you in a hug, your head resting on his chest as you looked up at him and nodded. “well, then... we’ll just deal with it together.” his words sounded so sure, like he meant it. “you promise?” you stared up at him and he placed a kiss to your forehead before answering with words of his own “promise.”

003. SIM JAKE

“Jake Jake Jake!!!” you basically jumped into his arms after seeing him in the building after a whole damn month. sure, you two maintained long distance during your tight schedules but there was something else about seeing his handsome face in person. “someone missed me too much.” he teased, before letting you go as he saw his members giving him looks. “should I apologise?” you looked over at his friends who were signalling Jake about something. “i don't think so.” he reassured as he saw the way his manager face palmed upon seeing you two. It was obvious Jake was going to get a scolding about the pda you two kept showing even in the company building.

004. PARK SUNGHOON

“what’s with the mood today?” Sunghoon was good at guessing the charts of your emotions as he pulled you onto his lap, trying to understand what had upset you. “this.” you glanced at him with a frown as you extended your phone for him to see the already open article that showed ‘fans speculate Sunghoon is dating this actress...’ some attached pictures and proof. “you don't really believe this stupid source, right?” his hand was at the back of your head as you buried your face in his chest, wanting to be close at times like this. “I know you won't betray me.” “thought so.” he rested his chin on top of your head, just wishing life could be easier for both of you.

005. KIM SUNOO

“god, you're such a life saver!” you let out, it was almost three am and your boyfriend basically sneaked in your dorm to bring you some spicy buldak ramen. You were on a strict diet and your manager would quite literally kill you if he found out that you are not only bringing your boyfriend in your dorm but also eating such unhealthy food. “well, I would've done this even if you didn't ask.” he added, watching you eat like you've never seen food since a month. “how cruel of them for starving my pretty girl.” he was staring at you eating from so long that you felt the need to offer him some of it, but he dismissed it by saying he wasn't hungry.

006. YANG JUNGWON

“geez, did you hear about y/n slipping off the stage?” as soon as he heard the news from the youngest in the team, he was pacing around the room waiting for your text or call or anything that could tell him you were safe and fine. “how did it happen? are you okay? any serious injuries?” he bombarded you with questions nonstop, head burning with worries and the need to see you as soon as possible... to tend your wounds but he also knew it wasn't possible because of the profession you two had. “yeah, I'm fine. It wasn't that serious.” you had said only to receive a “are you freaking serious? you got a fractured leg because of the fall.” and before you knew it, you had your boyfriend sending texts to your management team. All of them were about asking not to overwork you.

007. NISHIMURA RIKI

The boy was so excited when he finally made a girlfriend. He was practically jumping up and down as he told his hyungs about you. That excitement was kinda understandable since you were his first girlfriend but the responses he got back had him frowning and sulking in your arms. “they told me it's risky.” “that’s because it is.” you reasoned. “well but we're always careful.” his arm slowly making it's way to your waist. “yeah. very careful. nobody would ever know.” you broke into a giggle, you two weren't even at his dorm or your dorm but rather at night on a park bench. This was very careful... for sure...

© 2024 , all rights reserved to iconchae >

[inmyheaddd]

✦ nobody gets me, you do - averyjameson

a/n: wooo games untold release day!!! the first part of this is so silly help i love max summary: avery has the worst interview in the world, with constant interruptions and snide comments. jameson is watching it from home, (along with his brothers, max, and lyra) and finds himself going to see avery, despite her team telling him no. wc: 2.4k

max was watching her best friends interview live on her phone, sitting in her boyfriends bed.

she could read her like an open book, and could tell something was definitely wrong. 

“xander,” she called out the boy next to her who was solving a 9x9 rubix cube leisurely, laying on his back with his hands up in the air. “are you seeing this? look what they’re doing to my girl avery.”

xander sat up, and watched for a few seconds. to xander, she looked how she did the first time he ever saw her: scared, uncomfortable, but trying to put on a brave face.

after just two seconds, he called out at the top of his lungs: “jamesoooonnnn.”

no response. 

max pulled xander out of the room — much to his dismay, and finally spotted jameson in one of the libraries.

she barely got a word in before jamesons eyes flickered to her phone that was still playing the interview. his brows furrowed, “you’re watching the interview too?”

“…of course i am,” she deadpanned, “i’m literally avery’s girlfriend.

xander raised a brow from beside max, and jameson and him shared a confused look. “oh… right.” jameson said as he nodded slowly. 

“yeah…!” xander added. “how could i forget?...” he chuckled awkwardly, rubbing the back of his head as his eyes flickered between jameson and max.

“you guys are weird…” max trailed off, confused at their strange reactions, when she said something so completely normal in her opinion. 

 “but look!” she exclaimed, “she literally looks so… uncomfortable. in their right mind allowed this interviewer to have a job?” she said, as the two brothers looked at the tiny screen on her phone showing avery’s interview live. 

they quickly ditched watching it on the phone, because jameson suggested they watch it on the large tv in one of their living rooms.  

max rolled her eyes, muttering something under her breath that sounded like, “of course you’d suggest that.” but nodded anyway as the three made their way to the nearest living room. 

avery shifted in her seat slightly, her smile just a little off and strained as the interviewer asked another prying question.

“so, how does it feel to have your entire life handed to you on a silver platter- or shall i say, gold?” the audience laughed at the last line. his tone was light, but the implications were hard to miss.

avery smiled, like landon had rehearsed with her, trying to maintain her composure. 

“who the hell is this guy?” jameson scoffed, “seriously?” he stood up from the couch they were sitting on and ran a hand through his hair. 

“i wouldn’t exactly describe it that way,” she responded far too fast, so she went to correct herself— otherwise she wouldn’t her the end of it from her team. “but i’m endlessly grateful for all the opportunities i have, and for all the experiences.” she said with a smile that looked a little too sweet and practiced, that it made jameson sick.

the interviewer leaned forward, a cruel smirk on his face that made avery want to grimace. “oh?” he challenged, “so you’re saying the billion-dollar inheritance didn’t change your life overnight?”

xanders usual playful grin was gone as he muttered, “avery looks like she’s about to walk out.”

“she should.” jameson was now pacing in front of the TV, unable to stand still any longer. “if i’d been there—”

“but you’re not,” grayson said calmly, standing beside another couch that lyra was sitting on. “she’ll handle it.”

lyra had heard everyone in the room a few minutes earlier, and suggested her and grayson go see what was going on. 

jameson’s eyes focused laser sharp on the tv once again as he heard the interviewer mention his name, before turning back to look at grayson.

“she shouldn’t have to handle it, grayson.” his voice cracked with frustration.

her heart raced, but she managed a small laugh. “i think anyone’s life would change with something like that. my life has changed a great ordeal, but it’s more complicated than—”

“and what about your relationship with jameson hawthorne?” he interrupted, not caring for a single word she had to say. “was that part of the package deal?”

the live audience laughed, and avery just smiled politely, frustration flashing behind her eyes that only the people closest to her could spot.

grayson was going to say something to calm his brother down, but didn’t get the chance to. 

“oh, this guy is a fucking comedian, isn’t he?” jameson ran another frustrated hand through his hair, chuckling lowly as he exhaled. “i’m getting him fired— bankrupt for gods sake.” 

he knew how snobby-privileged-rich-kid he sounded even to his own ears, but he didn’t care. 

“yeah,” lyra chimed in, who rarely ever agreed with jameson.  “i’m with you on that one.”

jameson shook his head, letting out a blow of air that it almost sounded like a whistle, “goddamnit, i don’t care, i’m going. her team and the paparazzi can go to hell for all i care.” 

he turned off the tv, he couldn’t bear to see avery uncomfortable for another second.

nash stood leaning against the wall, sending a slight nod to jameson. “you need a ride?” he asked, alluding to the motorcycle jameson loves to use when he needs to blow off steam. 

with no complaints from nash, jameson knew that he was doing the right thing. 

he muttered something under his breath along the lines of: “too dangerous,” and shook his head. and with that, he made his way to the stairs. 

everyone shared confused glances — jameson hawthorne, saying something was too dangerous? something has seriously changed. 

“is it just me… or is jameson being weirdly responsible right now.” xander muttered as he looked at the turned off tv infront of him. 

grayson and lyra shared a look that communicated the message; ‘…he’s still not responsible.’ but didn’t say anything.

max nodded at xander in agreement. “it’s the avery effect.” she stated matter-of-factly. “i don’t know about you, but whenever i’m around her i feel like… woah, i just want to be a better person, you know?” 

xander thought about it for a moment with his hand on his chin, and then nodded ,like max had said something profound. 

he looked up at her, and then they both nodded in sync, sharing a high five. 

nash, who was still standing leaned against the wall, stifled a laugh, shaking his head in amusement before walking out of the living room. 

he was definitely going to be mentioning the “avery effect” to libby later.

— 

avery sighed as she finally got in the dressing room, leaning her head back on the door and shutting her eyes. 

she got to go home in half an hour now, finally. 

atleast she was done with that interview. 

she walked away from the door, slumping in her chair as she brought her hands to her face, looking into the large hollywood style mirror infront of her. 

she was hyper-aware of everything around her—the feeling of her clothes scratching against her skin, the way her makeup suddenly felt heavy on her face, the ache in her cheeks from smiling, and the slight tremor in her hands. 

avery re-enacted the smiles she gave throughout the interview, wondering if they looked too fake, if she needs to start tweaking them, and overthinking just about every small detail.

5 minutes had passed, and she was still staring into the mirror. 

surely this wasn’t healthy, but she stayed practicing the answers she gave, sighing in defeat when she remembered how people would take it as snappy and defensive.

god, she wouldn’t have wished that interview from hell on her worst enemy. 

her reflection started to look weird to herself, but she kept practicing the right way to smile, to not look fake.

suddenly, there was a knock on the door, and her attention was diverted from the mirror for the first time in 10 minutes. 

“yeah, come in!” she called out quietly, eyes fixated on the door, nervous to see who it was.

hair and makeup? someone from her team already there to scold her? or god forbid, the interviewer— her thoughts were all silenced when she saw pair of familiar green eyes.

“jameson,” she breathed out, “what are you doing here?” 

his hair was a tad messier than usual, and his eyes seemed panicked as he looked around the room, until they finally met hers. 

he shut the door behind him and locked it all in one swift movement and walked over to her, standing behind her chair she was sitting on. 

his hands found her shoulders, but she stood up and turned around, meeting him face to face.

“heiress,” he put his calmest voice on as his hands found their way to the sides of her face. “i was watching— we were watching the interview at home.” his eyes flickered between hers, “are you alright?”

she smiled a little, letting out an exhale. “yeah, why wouldn’t i be?” she shook her head in an attempt to portray she was confused. 

it was slightly difficult for her to act like she was perfectly fine, when she had spent the last 20 minutes doing nothing but overthink. 

he brought her out of her thoughts once again. “avery.”

“what?”

“i saw the look on your face— you may be a good bluffer, but not with your emotions. not with me, atleast.” 

unfortunately for avery, jameson could see what she was feeling when she tried her hardest to hide it, even from her own self. 

she sighed, trying to shrug it off. “jameson, it’s just one interview. they ask questions like that all the time—it’s part of the job.”

“i don’t care if it’s part of the job. you never asked for this.” his voice was hard-edged, his hands moving down her shoulders, then down to her hands. “you looked uncomfortable, avery. you shouldn’t have to be fine with that.”

“i was managing it,” she countered, tilting her head up to look at him, trying to ease the tension. “that’s what i’m supposed to do.”

her hands fiddled with his fingers with a mind of their own. it was a tell tale sign she was holding her feelings back. jameson knew it better than anyone.

“and that’s the problem.” he didn’t speak to her condescendingly, or in any way that was trying to belittle her. he was just worried. 

he simply cared, and it made avery’s heart soar. 

“they’re counting on you to just handle it every single time, like it doesn’t get to you.” his voice was low, “you shouldn’t act okay with it just because it’s easier. it’s not right.”

she wanted to prove that she was okay, that she wasn’t bothered, and that he didn’t have to worry about her, but she couldn’t, because then she’d be lying.

she let out a small sigh of defeat, “you’re right, jameson.” she shook her head, “i know… i just— i don’t want you to worry about me, or anyone to worry about me.”

“tough luck.” he replied, voice low but unwavering as his eyes searched hers. 

she opened her mouth to argue, but his hand gently brushed a stray piece of hair from her face, and the words seemed to fade.  

“its the worst thing in the world, seeing the hurt on your face. i hate it.” avery looked down, but he tilted her chin back up. “and,” he murmured, “i hate the people inferior who project their own problems onto you, because they feel like they can, even more.” 

avery couldn’t argue with the rest of what he said, but she needed to say something. 

“no one’s inferior to me.” she mumbled 

“please,” jameson said with a deep chuckle, “i could name quite a few.” he said. “for starters, that interviewer—“

avery cut jameson off with a light laugh, a sound that made jameson feel like the sun was shining down just for them two. 

his eyes flickered all around her face, his own smile growing as he committed the picture to memory. “he was the worst. am i wrong? tell me i’m wrong.” he teased, selfishly wanting more laughter out of avery because he loved it so much.

she shook her head vigorously, “no,” she laughed, “god, no. he was the worst. i hate that idiot.” 

jameson let out another one of his bigger chuckles, “keep going,” he joked, “there’s my heiress.” 

avery rolled her eyes jokingly, feeling the last of her worry fade away. “i wanted to punch him square in the face,” she said, and jameson rose his brows in amusement and nodded enthusiastically.

she continued, “but that doesn’t matter anymore, because you’re here now, and that’s more important.” 

he let out a breath, his shoulders loosing the last of their tension. “is that so?” he murmured, his hand slipping around her waist, pulling her a bit closer.

“yeah, it is.” and before he could protest or mention anything about her emotions any longer, she leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. 

he melted into her, arms wrapping around her fully, and tighter. she felt like she could stay in his arms for all eternity as she put her arms around his neck. 

the kiss was brief, reassuring, but enough to melt away the last traces of his worry.

when she pulled back, jameson was looking at her with softness in his eyes— one rarely seen by others, but always seen by her. 

his thumb brushed over her cheek, and his eyes travelled her face all over. he looked deep in thought, and avery could sense a question was stirring. 

“heiress?”

she hummed, “yes, jamie?”

“you know, i never mean to be,” he hesitated slightly, “overbearing, or controlling, i just…” he paused, pressing his lips together in a line as he racked his brain for the right words. 

“yeah, i know, jamie.” she nodded slightly with her hand brushing the sides of his face, understanding what he couldn’t verbalize.

his hand held her hand that was on his face, and moved it back down. 

both their hands were locked together now, and jameson rested his forehead on hers gently.

avery was so sure he would lean in for another kiss, perhaps one less tentative, now that she could see the tension had dissolved from his shoulders. 

she let herself relax, realizing that she stopped fidgeting with jameson’s hands a while ago. 

he brought her so much peace without even trying. she wondered if she ever did the same for him— and then jameson broke the silence. 

“i’m still getting him fired, by the way.”

avery laughed quietly, almost scoffing in amusement. she bit back her smile as she shook her head, taking a slight step back, hands still intertwined. “of course you are.”

“for you, heiress?” his cheshire grin slowly returned, reeling her back in close. he shrugged, “i’d do much worse.”

taglist: @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather @thecircularlibrary @whatsamongus @littlemissmentallyunstable

@anintellectualintellectual  @lovethornes @maybxlle @sheisntyou @emelia07

@midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @charsoamerican @hxress23 @imaseabear 

@clarissaweasley-10  @off-to-the-r4ces @thelov3lybookworm @graysw1fe @lanterns-and-daydreams

@hermesenthusiast @elysianwayy77 @that-daughter-of-hephaestus

[nerdnonymous00]

🛑🚨‼️ATTENTION PLEASE, JUST A QUICK READ‼️🚨🛑

hi im angie (she/they)! im a lesbian from the philippines. i’ve been a part of so many fandoms but im usually a silent like-r, reblogger, and supporter. i also make art at my sideblog, @angiedoesthingss. but now, im truly desperate and is currently asking for your help.

yesterday, after years of abuse from our narcissistic, homophobic grandma, i finally fought back and did my best to protect my mother and sister. it was a disaster and my grandma threatened us to leave her house (long story short, we live under her roof). i’ve always planned to move, but now, i need to bring my family to safety as soon as possible too.

we need to move for our safety and happiness by the first quarter of 2025. we’re planning to move back to our childhood home that we’ve currently put up for rent (the current renter is leaving soon - no worries). im planning to bring along my mom, my sister, our two cats and dog with me.

the thing is, im worried we wont be able to move because our funds have been so low. recently, i lost my main job because my boss was a creep. i only have a part time job now that only pays me $170 a month which is barely enough for me, much less my family. my sister just graduated college so she doesn’t have a job yet and my mom can’t get a job because it stresses and tires her out (she also deals with mental health problems - a result of this unstable environment).

my goal is to at least reach $500 to ensure that we’ll have enough money for the move and to sustain us for the next couple of months while we adjust to this new environment and heal. i would be so grateful and would appreciate any amount you can give for me and my family. 

it’s truly crazy how things can just change from one day to the next. a day before that altercation, i was cooking cordon bleu with my girlfriend at their house, watching arcane s2 act 1 - literally in lesbian bliss. and now im on a mission to save me and my family, to give all of us the freedom and life we deserve.

thank you for reading so far! and thank you so much for donating! im thankful too for any likes or reblogs you can give me to spread my little post. im hoping it will reach so many of you. i really hope we get to accomplish this goal.

i’ll be sure to keep updating this post as we reach certain milestones, maybe even reblogging with pictures of our pets! if youre from the philippines as well and would like to help, you can pm me and i’ll send you my GCASH information! again, thank you so much, i cant thank you, reader, enough!

(please click the photo for the link 🥹 if that doesnt work click here! thank you so much)

[eternal--dream]

Grayson’s Closet Support Group Chat | Part 2

AVERY: the hawthornes brothers in a nutshell:

NASH: what am i, wallpaper? LIBBY: yeah, what happened avery 🥺 AVERY: oops, sry nash AVERY: and libby AVERY: ang on lemme rectify that

MAX: okay, now THAT is accurate XANDER: i'm hurt but ykw i won't even deny it 😔 AVERY: sry BHFF, it's just a joke XANDER: i want an apology in scones. and for you to bake them yourself AVERY: welp, time to look up scone recipes XANDER: AND THEY MUST BE PERFECTION JAMESON: I DEMAND AN ATTORNEY. THIS IS A VIOLATION OF MY RIGHTS AND I’M BEING UNFAIRLY REPRESENTED HERE. I NEED A LEGAL COUNSELMSTAT 😤 XANDER: YOUR GIRLFRIEND LITERALLY HAS AN ENTIRE LAW FIRM IN WHICH SHE IS THE ONLY CLIENT. ASK HER MAYBE? GRAYSON: Actually, Jameson, in this context, your “rights” are, fortunately or unfortunately depending on the way you look at it, not being violated. The concept of “fair representation” only applies in formal proceedings where due process is involved, which, for the record, we are not currently under since this is just a casual, albeit chaotic, group chat. And as for legal counsel, unless we’re discussing a formal contract or the interpretation of wills under the law, no lawyer would even entertain this request. So, no, you’re on your own here, my brother. 🙄 JAMESON: Fine, fine, I’ll settle for a consultation with a legal expert - if they’re willing to take me on as a client. (I do come with a hefty hourly rate, after all.) 🤨 NASH: why would you be the one who comes with an hourly rate-

[bigshunt]

Omfg yes. Haha. Hope you don't mind me hopping on this idea train. You've inspired me. ☺️

U/throwaway13649563

AITA: My girlfriend (21FO) accused me (28MA) of being omegaphobic.

This is literally the stupidest argument I've ever had. We are both Formula 1 fans (you don't need to know about F1 to understand this).

I said Lando Norris bottles his starts because omegas can't focus under pressure like alphas can (most F1 drivers are alphas and there has never been an omega champion)

She turned this one little comment into a huge argument and now she isn't even talking to me.

I literally don't understand why she's mad cause it's just true? but she won't explain how what I said was wrong. I know some omegas feel some kind of way about alphas commenting on their emotions but this isn't about emotions it’s biology?

203 comments

u/mod-1

This thread has been locked. This got out of hand. OP I hope you get the help you need.

u/form-youll-ate: YTA. No omega champion - that we know of. smh.

u/throwaway13649563: [removed]

u/walkthroughwalls: INFO. You said we don't need to understand F1 to understand the argument but I am so confused. “bottles his starts?” Can you elaborate?

u/throwaway13649563: Sorry I thought it was obvious. Basically at the start of a race everyone lines up at the starting line and a series of 5 lights go on. Then all go off at once. As soon as the lights go out the drivers floor it and the race starts. Lando Norris is in a 'title fight' this year and has given up places at the start almost every time this year and also made big mistakes on the opening lap. Other drivers just don't do this and it's clear that his mental fragility due to his omega nature is to blame. He's an otherwise basically decent driver but when the pressure is on he folds like wet tissue paper.

u/walkthroughwalls: Okay I see. YTA. I just checked and there are 3 other omegas (that we know of) in F1 and they all seem to do fine at starts? And you JUST said he's fighting for the championship so I really don't understand how him being an omega is relevant?

u/throwaway13649563: [removed]

u/concioussquid: INFO. how long have you guys been together? How serious is this relationship?

u/throwaway13649563: [deleted]

u/concioussquid: bro that math ain't mathing.

u/throwaway13649563: [deleted]

u/astonfartin: YTA. omg girl if you are reading this. Run! Leave his ass! This whole thread is gross.

i have been desperate for months for a plot that can be turned into a social media au just so i can write omegaverse formula 1 subreddit discourse

[bumblingbabooshka]

In 'vis a vis' Janeway doesn't mention B'Elanna in the list of people who're worried about Tom which implies that B'Elanna didn't report the fact that "Tom" grabbed her arm, called her a disappointment and broke up with her (as Janeway definitely would have mentioned it as evidence of him acting strange if she knew about it) which makes sense on several different fronts but also makes me scream and cry loud enough to break glass.

[myrling-art]

I just finished Fionna and Cake, and I'm coping so well.

And since my sister has threatened to make a music video with Simon and Betty to the song "This woman's work" by Kate Bush, I drew this to destroy her first. 👍

[leonardalphachurch]

sometimes i remember that most north fans don’t write him as an absolute insane person ethical manipulative girlfriend style and i’m like. what is he even then… just a pleasant white man? you know what. more power to you if you need a pleasant white man for a blorbo but god that could not be me

[itz-pandora]

Huh. If my life was a quote, it'd be "one of those sad ones with a deceptively happy tune"

[floralovebot]

ALSO ive been rereading the comics again and its giving me so much winx/specialists and specialists/specialists friendship dynamics psychic attacks again

[rapidhighway]

Hnngg

[static-scribblez]

The bride and the ugly ass groom

[wolfeyedwitch]

Me: *experiences unpleasant things from People Being Crazy*

My inner whump writer: *takes notes about the feelings for more accurate future writing*

[girlyliondragon]

I wish I could selfship again.

I hate that I can't latch onto a character like I used to back then. Ex-'friends' hurt my ability to connect to characters on such a closely personal level so badly I'm straight up too scared to even try anymore bc hardly anyone understands outside the few oldest friends I (hopefully still) have.

My longest was three whole years, even me getting married to the character I selfshipped with and everything (it was one of those Cozy Games where you could date and marry an NPC character ala Stardew Valley-like, which helped the immersion, I felt actually married in my case), but then people made me feel ashamed to like the character for reasons I do not feel comfortable saying (lot of asspulling to put it lightly) to where I distanced myself from them, and then I couldn't get that close connection back again, I look at them and I just feel grief. Same with my last attempt here. Coercive ex from my last toxic "relationship" that I didn't even fucking want to begin with due to mental health tried to basically force me to "get over" my fictional attachments to focus on shitty real life as if that would fix me or at least make me happy as if a middle ground couldn't be had, which only hurt the mental thread more. Feel like had that not happened I'd actually be allowed to still heal in that regard. Bc I literally feel broken and empty otherwise so forever Fuck You with your "it's just fiction so get over it already" shit as if you thought you could fix me and my relationship with the unreal. I was literally fine. :/

I want to feel a closeness to fiction again. I really hate that the feelings I get for characters are so fleeting now when I want it to last longer. Past shit has really hurt there and idk how to get that back.

Like that link was broken ever since early 2023. The headspace I've tailored since I was 12 is just broken and it's been so hard to remake it anew. It really does hurt as someone who had been doing this since I was very young, now it's like I can't to the degree I did then anymore.

But moreso than anything it fucking pisses me off.

[softquietsteadylove]

Would you continue the Addams Family au?

"Thena?" Gil whispered in his family's expansive home library. He didn't receive a reply, but he should have known he would lose her to his family collection.

He had shown her around the manor as soon as she and her father arrived. Their fathers went to talk business and he was entrusted with her. So, like normal, he had taken her hand and led her away from the business talk and to show her around their home.

The library was only the third stop on their tour, counting just looking out the windows of the grand hall, but she had laid her eyes on all the books they had and excitedly asked if they could explore it.

How could he say no to that?

She looked so cute and enthused and he rarely got to see that sparkle in her eye with both her parents breathing down her neck. He was happy to encourage her, even if it meant potentially never finding her again in the labyrinthine shelves.

"Thena," he whispered again, walking slowly in case she was crouched down behind a stack waiting to be re-shelved. "Are you still in here?"

"Gil?"

He poked his head around a corner and found several piles of books, all several tomes high but arranged very neatly in their respective stacks. He chuckled, "find some stuff you like."

Thena immediately turned contrite, and maybe a little flustered. She looked down at her piles from up on the ladder. "I-I'm sorry, perhaps I have let myself get carried away."

"Hey, don't let me stop you," Gil said gently as he came to the base of the ladder. He both held it steady and averted his eyes as she scurried down in her white dress. He chuckled down at the black and white floor tiles, "someone should read them--might as well be you."

Thena offered her thanks silently in her expression, which he was used to. But she looked down at the books she had pulled out for herself and even hugged the one she was holding to her chest. "I can't possibly take them with me. Even if you say so, Father would be mortified at the idea of me taking such liberties."

Gil made a face, rolling his eyes only while Thena wasn't looking at him. Her father was a real pain in the ass sometimes. "Hey."

"Hm," Thena blinked as he started picking up one of the stacks in his hands. "Gil?"

"Let's just make you a shelf of your own," he suggested, balancing the books in his hands as he walked somewhat blindly to where there were still a few empty shelves in the back corner. "Then you can save all the ones you want to read and borrow them a little at a time."

"Truly?" Thena inquired behind him. He heard a few covers thunking around and finally turned. Much to his relief, Thena had about a half a stack in her more delicate hands, hurrying to follow him.

"Yeah," he laughed at how baffled she was that he would let her borrow some books that were just collecting dust. "I don't spend much time in here, really. These shelves are actually mine. Ma thought it would encourage me or whatever."

Gil set the stack down on the floor first rather than try to angle and cram them all onto the shelf at once. For the most part, he wouldn't really care if they fell or got damaged, but if Thena wanted to take them home with her then he could at least treat them with a little respect.

"Thank you," she said quietly, keeping her eyes forward as she also shelved the books she had brought with her, even shuffling them around the ones he put up to alphabetize them in real time.

He smiled as the backs of their hands brushed, although Thena was quick to retreat from it. "Any time, Thena. You're welcome to anything and everything here."

"That is a generous," she laughed faintly, "and dare I say unrealistic invitation."

"Maybe," he sighed. As much as his wildest dreams could be of him gallantly suggesting they run away together from both their families' strict rules, it simply wasn't an option. "But so long as you're with me, I mean it."

"That's sweet."

With no more books in hand to shelf, Gil looked over at her. She clasped her hands in front of her again. It was natural for her to totally clam up, he was coming to learn the more time he spent with her. It was a shame, though--like a beautiful flower that could only bloom by itself.

Or something poetic like that.

"Father is excited to discuss their railway negotiations," she murmured, returning to the safer topic of their fathers' shared business interests. She returned to her piles, picking up a few more books for herself.

Gil sighed as he picked up another full stack. But he didn't expect her to suddenly be able to view her father in a new light after living directly under his thumb all her life. "Yeah, Pop is all giddy at the thought of your dad using it to ship his building stuff?"

"Indeed."

The two fell into silence again, only the sounds of the books on the shelves filling in the air between them. They hadn't struggled to speak much before now, but he was struggling to think of something just as much as she was.

He had tried flirting with her before. And while she hadn't gotten mad at him for it, he wasn't really sure if she wanted to go down that road again, either.

He looked over as Thena cleared her throat faintly. She was determinedly looking at each book spine as she arranged them. "Do you have a favourite?"

"Book?" he asked, and then immediately felt dumb with the weight of a particularly thick one right in his hand. He also looked at the shelf, feeling the back of his neck grow warm. "Uh, kind of. It's a little embarrassing, though."

"What could possibly be embarrassing about it?" Thena asked, her curiosity beating whatever tentativeness she had.

"Well," he sighed, knowing that as soon as she asked, she was going to get the honest answer anyway. He looked upward, feeling the back of his shirt and suit jacket against the heat in his skin. "I was a kid."

"My aunt wasn't really the type to play with me much, but whenever she visited, she would read me whatever story I wanted. I had adventure books about pirates and knights and stuff. But one that was her favourite was about this lonely woman."

"Oh?" Thena leaned closer.

"She lives outside of town, all alone, and everyone thinks she's a witch or some sad, old widow or something. But then one day, a man stumbles to her door. She opens it up and he's been travelling, but he's collapsed, on the verge of starving. So she takes him in and gives him a meal."

"When he asks why she helped him she says 'I don't know'. She keeps trying to get him to leave, but he's like, 'oh, my shoes are in ruin', so she fixes his shoes. Then he's like, 'oh, I have no food for the journey to the next town', so she bakes him biscuits to take with him. Then he's like, 'yknow, it's getting cold, sure could use a coat'. And she says, 'ugh, here's your stupid coat'."

Thena laughed along as he went through the summary of the old story.

"Then, finally, this guy is ready to get back on the road. He says goodbye to this woman he's been staying with for weeks now, and he asks if she wants to go with him. She says she can't. But he asks why not--she's just shown him that she can prepare everything she needs to make the trip. So what's holding her back?"

"And basically the woman realises that she's only staying there for the sake of it--because she's afraid to leave her home. But the man tells her just to come with him to the next town, just to see what it will be like. If she doesn't like it, then he'll walk her back to her home and be on his way."

Thena's expression shifted in real time as he continued. She toyed with the end of the tight blonde braid wound over her shoulder. "What a sad conclusion."

"Lucky it's not over, then," Gil grinned, causing her to laugh again. "She goes with him to the next town. It's a short trip, only a few days. And they see the sights, and she gets to experience nature and stuff, and blah-blah-blah-"

Thena nudged his arm affectionately, "don't skip the best parts! You told me in such great detail her making biscuits and sewing a coat!"

He laughed, enjoying fussing with her as if they were kids. "You've gotta read it for yourself!"

Her eyes changed as she stopped poking his arm and folded in on herself again. "Will you not tell me the ending, then?"

He could decline to, and just tell her to read the book for herself. But she also seemed like she really wanted to know. He put his hand on her shoulder as he moved away from the shelf that was now hers to one of his. "It has a happy ending, if you're worried about that."

"So you won't tell me," she half joked and half lamented. But she watched as he searched through the other books.

"Ah!" he pulled it from the shelf, careful with its delicate but well kept spine. He grasped it with both hands as he held it out for her, "it's a love story."

Thena accepted the book from him, letting their fingers brush together again. Her eyes looked down at the cover as her pale skin took on a little colour, "oh?"

"Yeah," he pulled away, returning to being sheepish about it. "It's kinda cheesy, I guess. But it really is a good book. And I think maybe you'll like it."

She pulled the book closer to herself, smiling at him shyly as her eyes darted between him and the pages. "Thank you, Gil."

Heat rose in his cheeks as well and he looked towards the entrance of the library, just to occupy his eyes. "Yeah, I mean no problem, keep it for as long as y-"

A foreign object, soft and warm, collided with his cheek as he was looking to the side. He looked forward again, just catching Thena leaning away and off of her toes and back onto the slight heel of her shoes.

He wasn't sure if his heart was pounding like a hummingbird's wings or if it had stopped completely. But he just stared at her.

She arranged her braid around the book she was holding more preciously than Theseus. But her smile was almost like a little bit of a smirk, and it suited her. "I shall let you know when I've learned of this ending you're keeping so secret."

Gil immediately thought of the story events, and his aunt's favourite section. He could remember the tears in her eyes as she would read the part of the man desperately confessing his love and learning that the woman wanted to see the world with him instead of going back to her little home all alone. He could remember her voice cracking when she read how the man asked the lonely woman to marry him.

But that would be crazy to think about in relation to a girl he had only met a few months ago, he told himself (very firmly).

He grinned, drawn to her as she bounded back to her other piles of books, still waiting to be shelved in their little home here in his family house. "Hey, I can't spoil it. You have to experience it for yourself."

"I think you're just a tease," she stated with a faint purse in her lips.

Maybe he was, but he just couldn't resist when it came to her.