#literally can't stop thinking about them.
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Yandere Soldier x Reader - NonCon
Yandere! Soldier with his foreign accent and foreign guns. With muscles that show even underneath all his body armour.
Yandere! Soldier who's part of a platoon sent to keep an eye on your neighbourhood. Who's looking for insurrectionists hiding in plain site.
Yandere! Soldier who's suspicious of everyone and everything.
Yandere! Solider who notices you all too quickly, with your books and your pamphlets. Who's immediately suspicious about the people that come and go from your apartment at all hours.
Yandere! Soldier who barely even waits for permission from his commander before he's leading a squad to bust down your door.
Yandere! Soldier who somehow ends up in your panty drawer and who lingers far longer than he needs to. Who searches through them - ostensibly for contraband - just so he can feel the silk and lace on his calloused hands. Who keeps picturing these lacy little things under your neat pleated skirt.
Yandere! Soldier who's pissed as hell when he can't find any evidence of rebellion. Hell, even those pamphlets you were carrying around the other day are gone. Who's disturbed by how calm you are - despite a bunch of soldiers ransacking your place.
Yandere! Soldier who grabs onto your wrist right before he leaves, who looks into your eyes and says that he knows something about you is suspicious. That you might have escaped this time but at some point, you're going to slip up.
Yandere! Soldier who can't help but notice how fragile your wrists are, how delicate your neck looks. How helpless you would be if it weren't for your frighteningly sharp tongue.
Yandere! Soldier who grins just a little when you threaten to demand a replacement door from his Sergeant.
Yandere! Soldier who finds himself stopping outside your apartment more and more on his patrols. Who tells his squadmates that he's suspicious of you, when really he just wants a chance to watch you go about your day.
Yandere! Soldier who finds himself gripping his rifle when he sees you walking alone with your male classmates. Who more than once has them stopped and searched.
Yandere! Soldier who takes his frustration out on his sparing partners - to the point that no one wants to train with him for fear of splintered bones.
Yandere! Soldier who keeps running into you. And despite his body armour, his rifle, his rank and power, you never seem impressed or even afraid of him.
Yandere! Soldier who watches as the martial law on your city becomes stricter and stricter. First the curfew, and then the armed checkpoints, and then the armored vehicles parked on seemingly every street corner.
Yandere! Soldier who knows what really happens to suspected rebels when they're held for questioning. Who keeps thinking of your wrists dwarfed by his hands. Who keeps thinking of your pretty hands mangled by the interrogators.
Yandere! Soldier who finds himself alone outside your apartment, so nervous that his hands are trembling. Who knocks and knocks on your new door until you open it, still sluggish with sleep.
Yandere! Soldier who doesn't give you a chance to scream as he shoves his way into your apartment and kicks the door closed behind him.
Yandere! Soldier who manages to hold onto you even as you kick and bite and swear at him.
Yandere! Soldier who hisses at you to just shut up and listen. That for once, he's trying to help you.
Yandere! Soldier who has to literally grab you by your collar and slam you against the wall before you stop trying to bite him.
Yandere! Soldier who tells you that the army intends to arrest you tomorrow morning on suspicion of insurgency. That he knows a place where you'll be safe.
Yandere! Solider who doesn't listen to your complaints or objections. Who zip ties your wrists together and gags you before hoisting you up on his shoulder.
Yandere! Soldier who doesn't even notice you banging your fists against his back.
Yandere! Soldier who drives all the way across the city in an armoured vehicle with you tossed across the backseat. At the checkpoints, his fellow soldiers just smirk and tell him to enjoy himself.
Yandere! Soldier who brings you to an old room in an old building. Who tosses you down on the bed and suddenly realises just how close you are.
Yandere! Soldier who slowly leans down to kiss your cheek. Who smells your perfume and feels himself slowly going feral.
Yandere! Solider who kisses down your jawline and then down your neck, his lips as light as feathers. Who runs his palms up your waist, marvelling at the softness of your skin against the roughness of his hands.
Yandere! Soldier who pins your hands above your head so he can admire your body stretched out underneath him.
Yandere! Soldier who knows this is wrong. Who knows it's going to hurt you and haunt you. Who feels his heart clench when he looks into your crying eyes.
Yandere! Soldier who knows, but fucks you anyway.
Yandere! Soldier who is so gentle, that you almost wish he meant it. Who keeps one arm wrapped around your waist the entire time. Who keeps whispering to you in his native language, his voice rough as in prayer.
Yandere! Soldier who keeps his forehead pressed against yours even as he thrusts deep inside you.
Yandere! Soldier who stays inside of you even after he comes. Who just wants to feel the warmth of your body under his. Who wants to pretend that the little muffled sounds you're making are out of affection.
Yandere! Soldier who cuts your bonds away with his combat knife. The blade catches the moonlight and it breaks his heart when you flinch away from him.
Yandere! Soldier who tries to convince himself he did the right thing. You're safe from the interrogation room, aren't you?
Yandere! Soldier who looks at your tears in the moonlight and realises his love was the worst thing that ever happened to you.
Yandere! Soldier who falls asleep with you in his arms, his dog tags pressed against your shoulder blades. Yandere! Soldier who knows that he's a monster, but holds you all the same.
Yandere! Soldier who whispers to you just before he falls asleep.
Мне жаль
I'm sorry.
Но я люблю тебя
But I love you.
#soft but utterly corrupt#he will keep you and keep you safe#yandere#yandere noncon#yandere scenarios#yandere drabbles#yandere imagines#yandere lemons#yandere x reader#reader insert#x reader#yandere soldier#yandere marine#usmc
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I'm so sorry but my tolerance for this shit is getting so thin
after years of grooming jokes and accusations about pedophilia and things where we had to really question whether we were going to continue to be fans of this man--and mounting evidence got thinner and made less and less sense--it's really hard to sit back and watch people shit talk him with literally NOTHING
They can't substantiate anything. They can't give examples. They certainly aren't relying on him for monetary reasons right now (except how, you know, they can't keep his name out of their mouth for content purposes), so surely they aren't scared to show the proof, right?
No. They're idiots and clearly doing this for clout purposes and to stir drama up and to make us watch their stupid videos to run their numbers up.
If Dream is a bad person, for real, then i'll unstan him. I've unfollowed people before that i used to really enjoy (shane dawson, david dobrik) and i'll do it again if I need to, but all this whispering and rumor mongering is fucking stupid and needs to stop.
My new thing, when i see a clip of tommy or jack or whoever talking shit, is to feel sorry for them.
Imagine not being able to do anything on your own and having to rehash stuff that happened years ago to have something to talk about on your own goddamn podcast. Didn't Tommy do stand up? I wouldn't know, I didn't watch it. Maybe talk about that. Expand more on that. Try to get a career out of that going. Stop focusing so much on someone else and run your own shit because I guaran-damn-tee you that Dream was not thinking about you when he was making the titan project.
If you can't find anything else to talk about on the podcast that literally no one asked for, then maybe don't have a podcast. it's as simple as that
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Birthday Kiss | Nightcrawler x Reader | One Shot
Author's Note: I find out an hour after waking up at almost 3pm it's Kurt's birthday... had to write something for the blue lad... German translations at the bottom !!
Summery: It was known by everyone except you two that there was something... awkward between you and Kurt. The exchanges of glances when the other wasn't looking, the way your laughs trailed off... Nothing but tonight was the end of all that.
Themes: Birthday, First Kiss, Fluff OMG, so much Fluff, Mutual Crush, Open Ending, Alcohol/Drinking Mention, Awkwardness, Flirting, Guest Appearance of lots of characters, Kissing (duh), Kurt Has a Beard and Forked Tongue (because fuck you), His face is also skin (not fur), Shorter!R (<5'9), R is a mutant/x-man (No Powers Written).
Word Count: 1.4k
The X-Men knew that Kurt wasn't one to like big celebrations, but that didn't stop them from forcing him out of his comfort zone. They rented out a mutant friendly restaurant for the blue boy's birthday. He had to be quite literally dragged by the hair into Wolverine's jeep to go. It was a site to see, really.
But you were happy to see him warm up to the idea as you crawled into the backseat next to him, his tail stopping it's anxious swishing to wrap around you and bring you closer. This made the both of you blush, his cheeks a faint purple.
"So... you knew about all, uh...this?" He asks, voice barely above a whisper.
"Who do you think brought up having a party?" You laugh, smile beaming as you look up at him. His blush deepens at the thought.
"Was?? Since when?!" He laughs, shaking his head as he tried to hide behind his hands. You reach out and pull his hands away from his face, his yellow eyes widening at the sudden act.
"The first, duh. I knew your birthday was coming up, and I wanted to make sure you knew we cared for you, Blau." You say, quickly watching his reaction, which was much softer than you imagined it would me.
"Well, I should have excepted it from mein Freundchen, huh?" He laughs, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you flush against his side. If it weren't for the slight bumps of the road, your ear would be flat against his chest. He quickly puts his knuckles against your scalp and gives you a noogie.
"Keep it civil back there, kids." The gruff voice of the driver and owner of the jeep said, cigar smoke puffing out his mouth as he spoke.
"Sorry, Logan!" You respond, pushing Kurt off of you, your own cheeks hot with blush. You look over to Rogue, who sat on the other side of Kurt, watching the two of you with a small smirk on her face. "What're you looking at?"
"Oh, nothin', sugar." She says, eyes darting between you and your friend, before turning to look out the window. You weren't sure what she meant, but quickly turned your attention back to Kurt, who shrugs and laughs. You watch as he turns to his sister and gets her attention with his tail.
You watch the two siblings mingle, resulting in both of them laughing about some inside joke. It made your heart flutter to hear him laugh, a big change from the man that didn't even want to celebrate his birthday, having to be dragged out of his room by you and Rogue, forced to get dressed in something slightly fancy, and shoved into the car.
The rest of the trip into town was filled with Wolverine's radio blaring some classic rock, small talk and jokes from the back sit of probably the worst trio to get on Logan's nerves, and the wind blowing through the car from the windows. You all finally arrived at the restaurant, having to wait in the jeep for the others. You get out and stretch your legs, quickly followed by Kurt as he sits back against the jeep, arms stretched high into the air.
You can't help but watch the way his white shirt slightly raises, showing just a bit of the blue fur underneath. You blush once again, quickly looking away before he can see. He finishes stretching, holding the front closure of his leather jacket. "You alright, mein Schatz?" He asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, yeah, don't worry." You wave him off, seeing two more cars pull into the parking lot. You smile widely, grabbing his wrist, "Come on birthday boy."
Kurt's glowing yellow eyes widen as you pull him along towards the others, a humbled laugh leaving his throat as his tail swishes anxiously behind him. The two of you start a conversation with the others, Scott and Hank both giving Kurt a pat on the back as they greet him. You can't help but notice, even with all the people around, he's staring right at you majority of the time.
The party quickly moves inside, a slight rain picking up in the city. The restaurant was on the top floor of the building, high in the sky with a nice balcony. It wasn't that much a big room, the X-Men filling it up pretty well with the amounts of guests. You were quickly separated from Kurt as he was dragged to the bar by some of the guys. You watched from a distance as they all took a shot. You kind of wished you were there to see what they cheered to, but it was less important than the gossip that Warren was spilling to the small group you found yourself apart of.
The night continued on, food being brought and distributed among everyone. You heard a ring of glass being hit with something metal, getting everyone's attention as Scott stood in the middle of the room.
"Hello, everyone! Thank you all for coming out, truly. We're about to bring out the cake and play happy birthday, so if you'd all like to come over here," He gestured to the table next to him, a spot blank for the cake, "That'd be great, thanks!"
He quickly turned around and started talking with Jean and Logan. You looked around for Kurt, spotting him close to the table with a tail wrapped around his leg. You walked over to him, putting a hand around him in a side hug. "Hey, what's up?"
"Oh! Nothing, just... this is all wunderbar, liebe, I'm just a little... over stimulated?" He laughs out. You understand what he means, grabbing his wrist once more and pulling him towards the balcony.
"Then let's get some air, yeah?" You say, looking back at him and pausing before you step out the door. He nods, walking out with you into the cold air of the New York night. You both sigh, finally away from the loud party. You watch as Kurt walks to the balcony edge, leaning himself against the bars.
"Thank you," He grins, "for everything. I didn't think I'd want to be here, but it's very nice that you arranged this whole thing."
"Oh, it wasn't just me. We all pitched in. I just picked the music and decorations, really." You admit, trying to stay humble as your cheeks burned.
"Ja, but, you know," He turns back to you with a toothy grin, his fangs glinting in the moonlight, "it wouldn't have happened if you didn't ask to have a party."
You nod, understanding what he says but still not wanting to take all the credit. Before you can respond, he teleports behind you, the air around you surrounded with the familiar brimstone and ash smell. He places his hands on your shoulders, pressing a soft kiss on your cheek. The feeling of his goatee lingers on your skin as he pull back. "Danke, mein Fraund."
If your face didn't already feel hot, it now felt like it was on fire, your blush dripping to your neck and ears at the gesture. You look over at him, a genuine smile on your lips. "You're very welcome, Kurt." You say, turning around and wrapping your arms around his middle. You nuzzle against his chest.
You both stay there for a few moments, taking it in. You pull away first, heart pounding as the thought of your next action. Your hands travel up to Kurt's face, holding it in place as you stand on your tiptoes. "And... you're welcome for this." You say softly before pressing your lips flush against his own.
Kurt tenses up for a moment, the glow of his eyes disappearing as he closes his eyes, leaning further into the kiss. This shocked you, making you gasp, taken aback as his forked tongue licks across your bottom lip. He pulls you closer into him, a hand combing through your hair and holding your head in place.
You open your mouth, allowing him access into it. He chuckles softly, tail snaking around your hips. The kiss feels like it lasts forever, the two of you tangling in one another. When he finally pulls away, your eyes open to the sight of his cheeks a deep violet, feeling his breath pant against your lips as he presses your foreheads together.
"Did... that really just happen?" He asks, voice hoarse.
"Yeah, it did... It very much did, Kurt." You respond, pressing your lips against his again, but only for a moment. "Think of it as... a birthday gift, yeah?"
"I think a birthday kiss is the best thing you could have given me, Liebchen." Kurt laughs, capturing your lips once again.
"Was?" = What? "Blau" = Blue. "mein Freundchen" = My friend (in a condescending/playful way). "mein Schatz" = My treasure/My darling/My sweetheart. "Wunderbar" = Wonderful. "Liebe" = Love. "Ja" = Yes. "Danke, mein Fraund" = Thank you, my friend. "Liebchen" = Darling.
#kurt wagner#kurt wagner x reader#kurt wagner xmen#nightcrawler#nightcrawler x reader#x men#x men 97#x men comics#x men movies#x men nightcrawler#x men x reader#x reader#xmen#xmen nightcrawler#xmen x reader
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A robed figure hunches over the campfire, desperately striking a flint onto the damp tinder, cursing up a storm.
"Rindell?" A rogueish halfling sidles up next to him. She raises an eyebrow quizzically. "What are you doing?"
"I'd think it'd be fairly obvious. I'm trying to light a fire."
"...With a flint?"
"Yes, with a flint?! How else would I do it?"
She waves her arms around, exasperated. "I've seen you light fires with a snap of your fingers! You LITERALLY just set five bandits ablaze with an explosion like two hours ago! Can't you just use magic?"
The robed man looks back at his companion. Finally, he sighs and stands. "Look... you can't tell anyone else in the party about this, alright? Promise?"
"About what?"
"You have to promise."
"...Okay, fine, I promise I won't tell anyone else, about... what, exactly?"
Rain continues to drizzle on the two adventurers as the fire pit sputters and smokes. "Look... I wasn't trying to set them on fire. You remember back in Brightfall, with the mayor's lackeys? I was trying to do it like that, but on a larger scale, like a fireworks show, okay?"
"So... you fucked up your spell?"
"Absolutely not! I studied for decades at the Enrothian Academy! My gestures are perfect, my enunciation is flawless! Something about this place, the... the weave is strange."
She smirks. "You don't sound convinced."
"I'm not. I don't know why it didn't work like it should. They talked about this at the academy, that sometimes things that worked reliably in the past would just... stop. The formula hasn't changed, but for some reason the effects do. I pored over it for five hours, double checking every figure, every syllable. Somehow, it changed. I don't know why. And I don't know why trying to light this godsdamned fire made it start raining."
"Wait, what?"
"Yeah. I can't explain it either, no wizard can. So for the foreseeable future, we're lighting fires with flint and tinder."
"Shouldn't you tell the others?"
"What they don't know won't hurt them. And don't go spilling to them when they get back, you promised, remember? I'm good at improvising, I can get it working in a pinch. Just... don't count on it, okay?"
The rogue shakes her head in confusion and slowly backs away to tend to their own tent. The mage makes a quick gesture, and a yellow duck familiar appears in a cloud of smoke as he sets his finger on the top line of a page. "Alright, Chauncey - Let's go over this one more time..."
Wizards have as much faith in magic as software designers have in software - none at all. A wizard is explaining to the rest of the party why they won't use magic to solve all their problems.
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i can't be saved
ghostface!noah x f!reader
(a/n: this is supposed to be a halloween/ bday post for our king even though it's DISGUSTINGLY late (mainly cause my blog didnt exist on his bday lol whoopsie) but BETTER LATE THAN NEVER AMIRITE HEATHENS)
warnings: cnc/dubcon, breaking and entering, mean!noah, knife play, blood play (he carves his initials into the reader lol), impact play, degradation, choking/ asphyxiation, creampie, general feral word vomit things, readers.. kinda dumb
1.3k-ish words
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it was friday, october 31st, 11.32pm. rain gently drummed against the windows, thunder rolling in the far off distance. it was the perfect night for you to cosy up with a book you had been meaning to get to for literal ages, but never had the chance to. snuggled up on your couch, a vanilla scented candle lit, you got to work.
you barely got 50 pages in before a loud crash sounded through your house, ripping you from the story you had just begun to immerse yourself in. what the actual hell was that? against your better judgement you stood up slowly, slippers quiet on the hardwood floor, and walked towards the area of the house where the sound had come from. you felt cold dread run down your spine as you saw it: one of your windows was torn completely open. the thud had been the window being thrown open and slamming into the wall. somebody was inside. mind and heart racing in panic you started taking slow steps backwards, trying to think of how to escape, when your back hit something. or better, someone. you yelped and turned quickly, now facing a tall, masked man. you couldnt see anything behind his mask, but you could see strong, heavily tattooed arms... and a knife in his hand. that's all it took for your survival instinct to kick in and you sprinted past him, a loud laugh echoing through the halls of your apartment before he took off after you, his heavy boots slamming against the floor loudly.
panting in fear you reached your bedroom and practically threw yourself under your bed. it was cliche, but maybe, just maybe he wouldnt check. you covered your mouth to muffle your breathing just as his heavy boots slid into view, coming to a halt in front of the bed before starting to slowly walk around the room. you could hear him open the closet before closing it again and it sounded like he was leaving. you were about to exhale in relief when you suddenly felt a large hand close around your ankle and yank you out from your hiding place "found you!" you could practically hear the grin in his voice, despite his face being hidden behind the mask. you screamed in fear, fists pounding against his chest until he pressed his knife to your throat "now, pet, none of that. you have any idea how fuckin' annoying that gets?" slowly you lowered your fists, hands shaking in fear. not like you had much of a choice anyways "much better. now... i was going to kill you, but... seeing you like this... that'd just be such a waste, wouldnt it?" you sobbed in fear as his free hand brushed a stray strand of hair from your face "all you gotta do is be a good girl and stay still for me, and ill let you live. isnt that nice?" he moved his knife away a little, just enough to let you nod meekly "good pet"
he barely left you time to process before taking his knife to your clothes, cutting them off of you in a few precise cuts and strong rips. it barely took a minute for you to be completely bare and shaking before him. he hummed contemplatively and let the tip of his knife slowly drag down the valley between your breasts, down to your navel and stopping just above your pussy. his free hand made his way up your soft thigh, giving it a squeeze before parting your legs roughly to give himself more space. with a soft sigh his thumb found your clit, starting to rub in slow but firm circles. he laughed at your pathetic moan "you dirty bitch, youre gettin' off on this, arent you?" he sunk two fingers into your cunt and all you could do was moan out. before you realized what was happening he put the knife down and his open palm met your cheek hard enough to send your head lolling to the side, other hand sinking a third finger into your pussy "when i ask you a question, i expect a fucking answer" "y-yes- yes, im getting off on it-" you all but sobbed out, the pain of his slap making your cunt clench and drool even more. within minutes of him toying with your pussy you were approaching your high, hips grinding against his hand, but just as you were about to fall off the edge, he pulled away, stopping all of his touches "nah, not until i say so" "please, please- fuck, 'm so clo-" he didnt even let you finish before he backhanded you again. he gripped your cheeks harshly, blunt nails digging into your soft skin and pulling you closer to his masked face "you forgetting your fucking place here? im in charge, slut, you do as i say. do i have to remind you? dont worry, i know just what to do with dumb cocksleeves like you" he let go of your cheeks, roughly letting you fall back to the floor. his left hand grabbed your throat to hold you down, other hand positioning the tip of his knife between your breasts. as realisation dawned on you you sobbed, fear running through your veins but you were helpless as he dug the blade in, not too deep, carving his initials into you slowly. NS. once he was satisfied with his work he wiped the blodd off his knife on your thigh before discarding it "there you go. little reminder of tonight for ya, mh?" he let go of your throat to grip your thigh, pressing one of your legs to your chest while the other positioned himself at your dripping entrance, your chest buzzed and ached from the shallow wound, but the scariest part was how much this all turned you on. he hilted himself with one smooth thrust and it punched the air out of your lungs. he was so thick and long, it felt like you were being split open. barely giving you time to adjust, his pace was rough and ruthless from the start, hips slamming into yours fast and hard. your wails and cries filled the room, mixed with his occassional deep groans and the sound of your skin slapping together. one of his large hands wrapped around your throat just tight enough to make your head go fuzzy, eyes rolling back with a loud moan. he was ruining you, ruining you for any other man, splitting you open on his cock and fucking you to tears. it was too good. "gonna cum? 'sokay, you can cum now, such a good fuckin' cocksleeve for me, pussy's so tight and warm- made for me, huh? made for takin' my dick like this- gonna fill you so good-" his filthy words sent you over the edge, cumming with a liud cry. with one last thrust he pushed as deep as he could, cumming inside you with a loud groan.
after you both came down from your high he slowly let go off you and pulled out before pulling off his mask, revealing the dissheveled but handsome face of your loving boyfriend, noah "did so good for me love, thank you for lettin' me try this" "i had so much fun, happy birthday baby" you laughed softly and pressed a soft kiss to his lips which he happily returned before leaning down and licking the blood off of your chest. he sat up and scooped you up in his arms "now to get you cleaned up and pamper you"
#bad omens#bad omens smut#noah sebastian#noah sebastian smut#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian imagine#idek what possessed me to write this#enjoy ig#gnawing at the bars of my enclosure#i need him religiously
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Jayce and the fallacy of the butterfly effect in Arcane's narrative
If Jayce's symbol is the butterfly, then my theory is that we're going into a full "butterfly effect" narrative in Act 2. Either we'll watch it happen, or we'll only see Jayce come out the other side of it changed by the experience, knowing - or more importantly, THINKING he knows - what to do to change the future. Literally, to "defend tomorrow."
tl;dr: Jayce will encounter the butterfly effect in season 2. Viktor and Mel both foreshadowed this in season 1. I think Jayce will fixate on Viktor and will believe that stopping or changing Viktor either in the past or the present - most likely the present - will mean he can save the future. I believe this will lead to an even worse tragedy and may have the same effect as a self-fulfilling prophecy. Ekko's approach to changing the future by sticking closer to the present - considering only tiny increments of time to alter more immediate future outcomes - will be the superior approach. I also think that Jayce attempting to change the future will create the conditions that push Viktor to become the Machine Herald.
One of the most common reactions even the casual viewer had to Arcane season 1 was this: "If [character] had just done this one small thing a little differently, [tragic event] wouldn't have happened!"
Arcane has been called a Greek tragedy for the main reason that because of how well built up the characters' personalities and reasonings are, there's no other way season 1 could have gone. There was no stopping the multiple tragedies that occurred, because with one event leading to another, the chain of seemingly inevitable events goes too far back to identify what one singular event caused everything, what one character made what one decision to put our characters on the terrible paths they walked.
Arcane is about to investigate this idea in its own narrative, and I think that Jayce will be the character to stumble into the flawed idea that you can change one event, or stop one character, and change the future for the better. This is because Jayce struggles with a few very interesting character flaws, one of them being that he believes himself to be the main character, and it is therefore his responsibility to intervene, be a hero, and fix things.
Viktor and Mel both foreshadow Jayce's future encounter with the butterfly effect.
Recall that Viktor said: "There is always a choice."
Jayce sees choices in black and white, believes that he has no other options but to go along with what he's persuaded and pushed into, and acts too boldly with too much power multiple times.
Recall that Mel said: "We can't change what fate has in store for us, but we don't have to face it alone."
Jayce tries to solve big problems on his own, and though he delegates to Enforcers and the like, Jayce relies on his reasoning and his alone to make important decisions if he doesn't simply become persuaded - usually through strong emotions like fear - by other characters. In addition, since Mel is specifically talking about Viktor's plight here, it's worth mentioning that while Jayce did say that he would help Viktor in acts 2 and 3 of season 1, Jayce does wind up leaving Viktor to face his fate alone. When Jayce tries to change that fate in s2 ep1, ep2 shows that only tragedy can come of this as well.
Viktor and Mel's statements here are not contradictory. Viktor makes the point that you can always make a choice. In context, he's literally referring to the classic "secret third option," because given a choice between aggression and passivity, war and surrender, Viktor chooses to defuse the bomb instead. Mel, interestingly, seems to believe that destiny is fixed in a broad sense, and she operates as a politician and diplomat and investor who navigates that line of destiny in the most optimal way possible. In reality, in context, she is referring to the fact that Viktor can't change the way he was born and so he has no way to change his fate and therefore must face it, which is true - she's only missing the information that Viktor actually does have the means to change his illness and his body. Her wisdom still applies however, because he'll have to accept the hand that fate deals him after he makes that choice. Will he face it alone, or not?
There is always a choice, there's even secret third options, because having a fate doesn't mean that you are doomed to make only one possible series of choices. What it does mean is that each choice comes with a hand that fate deals you. It is impossible to know what all of these branching choices and consequences are in advance, and it is just as impossible in hindsight - the branches are too complex and the end outcomes are all equally meaningful, just different. If Arcane season 2 is to be a tragedy, it may show us that each possible outcome is still tragic if you fall for the fallacy of the butterfly effect.
Jayce is counseled by some of the wisest, cleverest characters with the deepest life experiences in Arcane, but he hardly ever takes that counsel to heart. If he does, he still acts on that counsel in flawed ways that have unintended consequences. This will come to a head in season 2.
Viktor and Jayce both have a butterfly following them around in season 1. The butterfly effect refers to one small seemingly insignificant event changing the course of history, and changing that event therefore changes history. Viktor bled over the railing of a Hexgate in season 1:
And Heimerdinger sees what we can only assume is Viktor's blood contaminating (?) the Hexgate in s2 ep3:
This might be the seemingly unimportant "inciting incident" that Jayce (and Heimerdinger and Ekko) settle on as something that should be avoided or erased by changing the past (if they time-travel with Ekko, for example).
I doubt that, if this is what this crew chooses to fixate on, it will be the only event that is considered as something to change. But let's take this and run with it for the sake of discussion.
As silly as it sounds, how do you stop Viktor from allowing his blood to come into contact with the arcane? Stop Viktor's involvement with the Academy entirely? Don't invent Hextech at all? But what if someone else invents Hextech besides Jayce? What if future tragedy befalls Piltover because it didn't invent Hextech?
The possibilities and what-ifs could branch on forever. But because Jayce is who he is, and because his tragedy with Viktor is still raw and recent and frightening, I think Jayce's butterfly effect experience will have to do with Viktor.
My personal prediction is that the timeskip between s2 ep3 and ep4 will be Jayce experiencing a timeline where Viktor, taken over by the Hexcore, brings about an apocalyptic event similar to what Heimerdinger experienced in his past. Either Jayce and co. can't go into the past to change the present, or Heimerdinger and/or Ekko advise strongly against it to avoid a paradox. This will lead to them re-entering the canon Arcane timeline before this apocalypse, but still after the timeskip. Jayce, believing that destroying Viktor and his cult will save the future, and believing that resurrecting Viktor was Jayce's mistake to fix, attacks him. But the consequences don't unfold the way he hopes, because trying to change fate once the cards have already been dealt has led to tragedy before.
The butterfly is a symbol of something other than just the butterfly effect - change, evolution, and rebirth. If the butterfly symbolizes the butterfly effect for Jayce, then I think it has a different meaning for Viktor - the change and rebirth meaning.
I've always found it very interesting that we see a similar-looking butterfly on Progress Day... but made of metal.
Every time Viktor's situation changes, he adapts and evolves. If Jayce attacks him, if his cult is destroyed, if the Hexcore is causing Viktor to decay, if all of these things happen at once - he'll just evolve again, and I think the Machine Herald is the next step. And the Machine Herald will be a triumph for Viktor, but Jayce will believe that he's created something even worse. The resulting feud will be a personal nightmare for both of them.
I think this still allows Viktor to use his own agency to choose to become the Machine Herald (the MH will probably be the "secret third option" that saves Viktor, or there will be a secret third option that ends the feud) while still allowing Jayce to be offended and horrified at whatever the Machine Herald represents or is trying to do in the undercity. Introducing the element of time travel allows Arcane to explore the meta concept of tragedy and fate that season 1 was built on while showing that you can't "solve" a tragedy, because there are other terrible possibilities lurking behind alternate choices. Especially if what you're trying to change is singular people or events and not systems of power.
This is why Ekko's approach with his Z-drive will be superior to Jayce's sweeping attempt at changing the future. Ekko's goal has always been societal change. He creates his own punk society in the undercity, more progressive and successful than anything Vander or Silco ever created, and a better bastion of safety, hope, and progress than what Heimerdinger founded in Piltover. Trying to change systems by going back in time is most likely futile. But taking what Ekko has already built in the Firelights, curing his tree, and fighting for the Firelights' survival bit by bit by optimizing the present with the Z-drive shows that:
It's more worth it to focus on becoming wise (Ekko's mask is an owl) and making choices you won't regret
It's best if you don't face your fate alone (act as a collective and take care of each other)
Consider every option, not just the obvious black and white choices
Maintain and fix what you've already built instead of abandoning it once things get difficult
Adapt as needed if the choices you made lead to dark consequences, and once again, stick together and take care of each other when the bad times do come
That's my Act 2 but, ultimately, my season 2 prediction based on the butterfly symbolism we've already seen. Ekko's involvement is what will give the series the at least partial happy ending that the creators have referred to. I personally don't think that the Viktor/Jayce feud will end quite so well, but maybe, they will still survive.
#arcane#spoilers#arcane s2#arcane spoilers#jayce talis#ekko#viktor#viktor arcane#long post#meta#jayvik#arcane meta#heimerdinger#I'm positive that Mel will be deeply involved with this too considering her comments on fate#honestly the thought of her being caught in the Viktor/Jayce feud is terrible to contemplate so I'm just gonna pray for my girl#I did not like the time travel implications when i first watched act 1 but after thinking about this i feel way better about it#Another reason I think this will come down to Viktor is because Heimerdinger has distrusted Viktor since season 1 and he will focus on him#Ekko will see the faults in focusing on one person#Jayce is least likely to survive all this considering how fast the consequences of his actions are catching up with him#but there could also be a chance here of viktor choosing to spare him - if only to curse him with the Defender/Herald feud forever idk#anyway i am feral for season 2 so far can't you tell
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Can't stop thinking about the scene where Wade takes Weasel to the strip club, and he's like, "How do you know she's here?"
Wade just says, "Cause i'm CONSTANTLY stalking that FOX," like damn, bro was NOT letting that kittycat get away from him that easily.
This leads me to also believe that he's so good at his job that he scopes out spots BEFORE the date of the mission.
That he would be a GREAT spy in the sense that not only can he hide his true emotions extremlt well so he wouldn't be amazing at devils advocate but this fucker is light on his feet. He's 6 foot 2 and still blends into the background when needed, and in the spotlight when he wants to be.
We all know that he couldn't sneak up on Logan since Logan has a wicked sense of smell, but I feel like if Wade ever had to give up Merc work (A COUGH COUGH COUGH like loosing his powers for what ever reason totally not foreshadowing COUGH COUGH COUGH damn I really gotta stop sucking dick so much-) he would be EXCELLENT at Narc work.
The only thing is he SUUUCCCKKKSS (literally and physically) at working for authority figures, so he would probably take up personal private detective cases. Snap pictures of people cheating, get a guy to confess to a crime on recording for a lawsuit, Track down missing persons probably.
But he would be bored. He would be incredibly bored. And a bored Wade is not a happy one. Infact a bored Wade is a DANGEROUS one. He NEEDS a job. A physical job. One that has strict end and strict beginings in which he can do quickly to get that rush of dopamine.
Stake outs that take 2 weeks is not a thrill.
Going to Japan and taking out the entire Yukuza IS infact a thrill. Job? Kill all of them. Done. Compelte.
He would need one that doesn't require blurred lines of completion. He thought that cars salesmen would be easy. You sell a car. You get paid. You go home. Boom. But no. Its more bullshit about being good at talking to civillians. Something he's not good at.
So- my question is.
What is a good job for Wade if he was forced out of merc work? Perhaps one he could do with Logan?
#deadpool 2#deadpool#Weasel#wade wilson#vanessa carlysle#what if#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine#logan howlett#wolverine#deadclaws#poolveriness#poolness#copypool
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Speaking as a white person... No, people of colour and wanting to be listened to, believed, valued, consulted, and protected in the countries they live in, and are citizens of(I'm Canadian, but I feel like it's all still Very applicable) -daaaaring to be any kind of vocal about how that doesn't happen and how they are, you know, VERY UNDERSTANDABLY not fucking happy about that are NOT the problem
To feel so comfortable saying so just demonstrates how far up your own clearly racist ass you are, no one who wasn't would double down and reiterate that astoundingly wrong opinion again but with more words
And "zero concrete examples"?? You've got some effective fucking blinders on if you can say that and believe it but think that white people's love of moving the goal posts for, and pseudo-intellectualizing away concerns, struggles and very real dangers to REAL PEOPLE who just aren't you/us isn't a very real and hugely documented, and far-reaching problem you're literally just stupid
There is no other way you can look at or hear people sharing their perspective on their own fucking lives and what is important to them as a person who is *specifically* not white and is not interested - and nor should they be - in being told to shut up, keep waiting 'their turn', quiet down, that their extremely valid and NECESSARY voices and experiences get summarily dismissed as "inane" because white people just can't fucking stop deciding that every single discussion about how white people and whiteness have done and continue to do SO much damage is about them specifically and personally that they at "best" allow their discomfort to not only often ignore objective facts about how AT THE VERY LEAST the vast majority of white people and peoples have historically been Very Shitty Indeed to peoples of colour, even people they just think of as 'not as good a white as us *insert north, western, or central European nations especially here*' but also to override or bypass sympathy, empathy, compassion or even willingness to fucking listen to them about their lives to the point that we white people shut anything not complimentary to us down. We are so fucking fragile that we can't seem to fucking get that not everything is about us, for us, concern us, have to include us and it fucking shouldn't have to. Especially when all we seem interested in is having access to any and all spaces so that we can pretend that "no, everyone else is actually wrong about things they-as a group have all professed to have experienced".
Like... Seemingly one of our favourite fucking things to do is brag about supposedly having friends of different ethnicities and cultures to anyone who will listen, so why do so many of us not fucking listen to them??? Why do so many of us then also not care or believe those friends?? Try to help? Aren't they your friends, OUR friends?? Even if it's a hard pill to swallow, why do so many of us white people actively stand in the way of supporting things that will help our friends, partners, family, coworkers(not to mention children, whether connected to you as an individual or not)?? If our friends and loved ones, wider communities are helped, provided for, listened to does that not also benefit us needy white people too by extension of being in the same potentially improving society that doesn't continue to waste so much fucking time and energy on keeping entire peoples down because white people are either insecurity and hate.
White people have been the "not all men" people who get mad when sexual harassment comes up; and yeah, most people know and believe that but that(usually unnecessary) distinction ultimately is diminishing, dismissing and ignoring the point of the matter which is that the generalized statement and belief that "men do sexual harassment" is because so many people have had those kinds of unpleasant interactions or experience, often repeatedly. Even if they were not talking about you specifically, and you've never done anything misogynistic or worse THEY have enough negative experiences with other men that that statement is true to them even if you find it hard to believe.
White people do that whenever anyone says anything about how we have in the past, but also continue to treat people of colour like shit. Like yeah, no shit not all white people are feral racists, just like not all men are creeps... But I dunno if enough people are saying that "more than a few(separate, unrelated, individual) white people have said/done/legislated negative things to and against me" maybe we should fucking SHUUUUT UUUUUP and believe them?? acknowledge that even if we, as individual white people have never knowingly or intentionally been racist there is still clearly A PROBLEM because we keep being told it is a problem.
So yeah, it's very much white people that have held us all back, even the progressive ones because we cant get out of our own way. And when soooo many of us demonstrably have been unable(or unwilling) to even recognize that, let alone do anything to change it it fucking ruins lives in a very real way and if you can't see that...you yourself are part of the problem with white leftists and progressives
**as a white person, and an untagged-by-OP one at that, I totally understand if you'd prefer I remove my addition to your post, in which case I absolutely will 🖤
Every white leftist should read this
#holy shit this gave me The Rages#ive been typing my rant for literal hours because i couldnt even think coherently#i want to rip something with my teeth now
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Yes,more please!
More Yandere Beast stuff? At your service, three short headcanons for each one
SHADOW MILK
Has one specific Pure Vanilla puppet that he treasures and never brings any harm to. It's the most well-crafted and detailed one of all. He calls it his Mini Silly-Vanilly and he makes it and the puppet he also made of himself kiss and do NSFW things
Tries to be A Bro™️ and help his fellow yanderes win over their respective loves. He eggs them on when they feel like ranting and raving about their love lives (or maybe he just likes gossip and drama idk), helps mastermind courting plans, gives romantic advice of dubious quality, solicited and not (mostly not). His help gets mixed reactions. Tough crowd :/
Already planned their wedding way in advance, but keeps making changes because he's always hit with new inspiration (making them playfully chase each other all the way up the stairs of the Spire of Truth and Deceit, and publicly executing their enemies in increasingly ridiculous ways are staying put, though)
ETERNAL SUGAR
Got Shadow Milk to make her a Hollyberry body pillow. It's nice, but she ended up tired of it really quickly. She wants the real Hollyberry to snuggle and squeeze and use as a pillow. (She still uses the body pillow though)
Would very much like to steal Holly's dresses and wear them herself, even if they might not fit. Would also like a lock or two of her hair to put in a necklace, or make into a bracelet, or weave into the strings of her harp (wtf lol)
Has mastered dozens of love songs on her harp, both written and composed by others and by she herself, all to be played and sung to Holly. A significant portion of them are very dark and unsettling, but she either doesn't notice or doesn't care
MYSTIC FLOUR
Once thought of the concept of playing "strip Go" (like strip poker, just with Go) with Dark Cacao. No one has ever seen her turn so red before. She immediately barricaded herself in her room and did not come out for almost a whole week
Keeps replaying that moment where he was beaten and on his knees and she was caressing his cheek, tempting him to look up and into her eyes, in her mind over and over and over and over and over and over again. It has practically tattooed itself to the insides of her eyelids. She can't make it stop nor does she want to
Ends up wandering along the exact same path through the mountains that Cacao took while he was lost and alone whenever she leaves the Ivory Pagoda. Some deranged part of her insists that she might find him again if she keeps looking, and the other, equally deranged parts of her seem to agree...
BURNING SPICE
Absolutely fucking loses his shit if and when any of the Wild Spices speak ill of Golden Cheese at all. He can roast her all he wants, but the second anyone else tries, he 180s to "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT YO FUCKIN MOUTH" mode
Is so out of his goddamn mind that he's already attuned himself to both Golden's aura and her scent, so he can literally track her and hunt her down like a ravenous animal no matter where she goes. He is a predator in the truest sense of the word
Also often fantasizes about marrying Golden, like how Milk wants to marry Vanilla. But what he thinks the most about is the wedding night... and the night after that, too. And the night after that. Every night is going to be their wedding night, once he gets his hands on her... Every single fucking night
SILENT SALT
Keeps trying to write White Lily letters and poems detailing his feelings. They keep coming out wrong (aka they are extremely long and rambling, not to mention fucking weird and creepy), so he keeps throwing them away and starting over repeatedly
Has considered learning magic to impress Lily, but can't get the hang of it. (Has also tried to brew a love potion for her, but can't get the hang of that, either)
He never takes that helmet off, but his stare is nevertheless so damn pointed and downright oppressive that Lily can sense whenever he's watching her, even if he's dozens of feet away and she can't even spot where he is. He comes out when she asks him to, at least...
#cookie run kingdom#burningcheese#goldenspice#silentlily#hollysugar#mysticcacao#pureshadow#shadowvanilla#yandere beasts
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I actually love the idea that Billy and William fused instead of just body-hoping. William would have died if Billy didn't come in and they fused! I love him saying that he has a mom because adoption right 🎉
Yes! The alternative is just too sad for me. As for the adoption thing, it's NOT just this fandom that struggles to understand bio vs. adoptive parents. I'm in the Star Wars fandom and there are SO MANY PEOPLE that refer to Anakin and Padmé as Luke and Leia’s "real" parents. Meanwhile, Owen, Beru, Bail, and Breha are called kidnappers or just ignored entirely (yes, I loved the Obi-Wan show. Why do you ask?)
I think the same problem is sometimes happening in this fandom too. We know Wanda and Vision as characters and we want them to be a happy family. We do NOT know Rebecca and Jeff Kaplan nearly as well, so there's a tendency to want to take the child from the characters we don't know as well and give him to the characters we know, like, and want to be happy.
On a slightly happier note, here's all my headcanons about Billy Kaplan's life (not Billy Maximoff or William Kaplan, but the entity that is both of them)
As William's heart stopped, his soul separated from his body and was on its way to wherever Jewish people go when they die
Billy M's soul, at the same time, was fleeing because it didn't have a body to support it
He found William's body easy enough to get into (because a soul had just left it) and close enough to alive to be fixed
However, William's soul was in between Billy M and the body
Billy M could have gone around and been the only soul in the body, but he was scared, okay?
Poor guy was only a couple days old, alone for the first time ever, and his mom had just kinda killed him and the rest of his family
Long story short, Billy M crashes into William and drags them both into the body
Billy M fixes the body just enough to keep living, but doesn't bother too much about the head injury
Meanwhile, William is stuck to Billy M like silly putty when you have two different colors and, by the time they get to the hospital, the two colors have blended entirely to form a new color
There's no way to differentiate one from the other
Billy Kaplan is born!
Because Billy M didn't fix the head injury, they both have amnesia
Billy K wakes up and it's literally "no thoughts, head empty"
(Except for some lingering sensation of loneliness... like there should be something someone? else there)
But not for long because he soon discovers he can hear other people's thoughts!
Which is really funny because he doesn't know that other people can't hear his thoughts
Poor guy genuinely thinks that humans communicate via telepathy for a solid 24 hours before he gets enough weird looks that he puts two and two together
(His parents are totally aware of this
There's only so many times your kid can answer exactly the thought going through your head without you catching on
Also, this is the Marvel universe!
Shit like this just... happens sometimes
They figure he'll come to them when he's ready, and until then they'll think nice thoughts and be supportive)
Billy K spends a solid four months trying to remember who he was before, stealing memories from his parents' heads, and pretending to recover from the amnesia
(Rebecca and Jeff try so hard not to make him feel like they're just waiting for their old son to come back but...)
Four months in, Billy's at the mall with his mom on some errands and that's where he sees it
Hot Topic
He begs his mom to go in there, and it's the first really normal teenage thing he's done since the car crash so she lets him
For the first time in four months, Billy forgets all about car crashes, and memories, and hospitals, and expectations
All that exists is spiky jewelry, ripped black skinny jeans, and a million of those cheap and hilarious pins
Over time, the family settles into his "new normal" and chalk most of it up to teenage experimentation
In that three year period though, Billy can't shake the feeling that something's still missing
He feels out of place in his body, even with the new aesthetic
(He sees that one tumblr comic about the coocoo bird and cries-- a lot. It's the closest he ever gets to telling his parents about his out-of-place feeling)
He doesn't tell them though
Instead, he digs and digs into the weirdest, darkest, most demented corner of the internet
Reddit
#agatha all along#billy kaplan#billy maximoff#william kaplan#rebecca kaplan#jeff kaplan#wandavision#amnesia#adoption#headcanon#star wars#luke skywalker#leia organa#bail organa#breha organa#owen lars#beru whitesun#hot topic#asks
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chapter 166 thoughts
As of chapter 166, Oshi no Ko has finished a roughly four-and-a-half year run started back in 2020. While there's some speculation about an epilogue or some extra content in volume 16 when it drops, this is where the main story ends. And you know what that means!!!
OSHI NO KO HAS OFFICIALLY ENDED WITHOUT ADDRESSING OR ACKNOWLEDGING THE FACT THAT RUBY KISSED HER BROTHER IN CHAPTER 143
please understand that this is FUCKING BOGUS
I'll probably do a longer post on this subject specifically, but my main critique of 143 when the chapter dropped was that while I liked the individual beats in it and I was really glad to see Akasaka finally addressing this tension bubbling underneath Aqua and Ruby's relationship, the immediate swerve away from showing us the aftermath of that kiss felt to me like an admission that the story was going to needlessly draw this out even more. Now that the story has ended and we can see that moment had literally no impact on the plot or even the character dynamics, I'd like to revise that statement - it feels like an admission of compromise. It feels like crumbs thrown to AquRuby fans to tempt them to keep reading and to stir up the waters of the ship wars, so people would keep reading and stay invested in the manga right to the very end. But most of all, it feels deeply disrespectful to both Aqua and Ruby as characters. Rather than exploring their feelings and giving both of them interiority and complexity in relation to incest or even just fucking acknowledging that the kiss had happened and letting their dynamic evolve, the series just memory holes the entire event and asks that you do too. Rather than letting Ruby have any development whatsoever as pertains to that relationship or, god forbid, let a female character move on romantically from the male lead, the series ends with her feelings so up in the air that I literally could not tell you what she thinks of Aqua by the time he dies.
ANYWAY… FINAL CHAPTER. BREATHES OUT VERY HARD.
I really can't believe it's taken us until the final chapter to actually deal with Ruby's grief over Aqua lol. We got a snippet of it last chapter but it was so brief that it really just felt like a tease. I also just think it's kind of bizarre that we're spending this little time on Ruby having feelings about Aqua's death to the extent that I have no idea how or when she found out about it.
It's also kind of hard to feel particularly strongly about Ruby's grief when the chapter doesn't really bother to explore it all that much. It's just a montage of Ruby quite literally Screaming, Crying and Throwing Up while Akane dispassionately narrates it all. The art also doesn't really help in terms of connecting with the emotions at play - I usually really like Mengo's expression work and the way she depicts extreme emotions but this all just felt like of… I don't know how else to put it. Goofy??? Is that an insane thing to say about Ruby grieving her brother???
Idk, something about both the panelling and just the extreme on-the-noseness of Ruby, again, literally Screaming, Crying Throwing Up while she's wearing a Burning cosplay Just In Case You, The Audience, Didn't Get It only for her to abruptly be done crying with no exploration or insight as to what's going on in her head that allows her to move forward.
Honestly, this is kind of the issue with everyone in the cast. The resolution is just sort of "Aqua died and we were sad about it but then we stopped being sad". I know what the story is trying to go for here - it's trying to express that even when you're in pain, life goes on and so you have to find a way to go on with it. But the result is that we spend all this time oogling at their pain without spending equivalent or even meaningful time on their recovery process.
It feels both excessive and undercooked at the same time and I'm left with the same icky, voyeuristic feeling I got from Aqua's funeral last chapter. This should be the point in the story at which we empathize with Ruby the most, but she remains a frustratingly distant figure right to the final pages. Part of this is an unfortunate consequence of Akane's narration directing these final chapters meaning that we're hearing about Ruby from an outsider's perspective and thus don't really see what's going on in her head… but if I can be frank, this has been an issue of Aka's with Ruby in particular basically nonstop since chapter 123.
As others & myself have noted, despite the absolutely catastrophic downward spiral Ruby is in at that point, Aqua revealing himself as Gorou basically flips it all off like a switch. There's some mild lipservice paid to the idea that Ruby is just using her dependency on Gorou to prop herself up and it's pointed out that the issues that contributed to her breakdown haven't actually been resolved - but none of these issues are ever even acknowledged again, let alone resolved. So, functionally, that reveal does fix all Ruby's problems in the space of a single chapter and the result is, again, that we spend multiple chapters gourging on depictions of Ruby's absolute rock bottom only for her to ping back to normal like a lightswitch. As such, the depictions of her pain feel less like explorations of Ruby's interiority and more like voyeuristic oogling at Ruby's misery and trauma and the effect is that the resolution to it all is both unsatisfying and a little gross. The result is that it feels like Akasaka is just indulgently mining the imagery of cute girls suffering because it causes simple thoughts neuron activation but doesn't respect these girls enough as characters to build them back up.
It doesn't help that this is basically the in-universe excuse for Ruby's career further skyrocketing. Instead of Ruby becoming a star on her own merits as the story keeps insisting she was supposed to, she's artificially buoyed by the public's morbid fascination with her tragedy. If I was feeling charitable towards the story right now, I would say this is an avenue of intentional critique but… well, I don't feel super charitable about the story right now lol
I WILL say that the one part of this chapter I did just uncomplicatedly like was the beat of Mem trying to suspend activities (presumably in the wake of her grief for Aqua) only for Kana to basically immediately explode into her room and help her get back on her feet. It's a beat that would've been much more effective if we'd, you know, seen it, but I otherwise enjoyed it and I thought it was sweet.
But. pbbbbtttt. I guess I can't talk around it any longer… let's get into the Dome concert.
To start things off on the immediately worst note possible, Akane describes Ruby performing at the Dome as being 'everyone's dream', including Aqua's. I'm reminded once again of the strange turn the story took in insisting that um, actually, performing at the Dome was totes Ai's dream all along (even though she literally didn't give a shit even a week before she was due to perform there herself) so Ruby performing there is fulfilling that dream for her!!! and I can't help but wonder if this abrupt shift in focus is an attempt to make readers forget what Ai's actual dream was - to see her beloved children grow up happy and healthy. Hell, it wasn't even really Aqua's dream, until the story suddenly had to try and convince us that his entire purpose for existence was to kill himself so Ruby could be an idol for slightly longer than she would've otherwise. The only people whose dreams she's textually fulfilling are Ichigo and Miyako and Ruby herself, but…
Honestly, is this really Ruby's dream anymore?
Who is Hoshino Ruby? What does she want? Why does she want it? These should be the very least of what we can concretely say about not only a protagonist but a character who has become a central figure of the entire story as Ruby has, but with the way Oshi no Ko has warped and distorted her, I find myself increasingly unsure of what the story wants her to be or how I should answer those questions.What does Ruby feel about Aqua? Was she still in love with him? Had she moved on, romantically? Was she still waiting for a response to her confession? Did she finally realize it was probably kind of shitty to respond to her brother going "lowkey wanna kms" by sticking her tongue down his throat? I Guess We'll Never Know.
This extends to whatever the fuck Ruby's relationship with idols and being an idol is. Almost the entirety of Ruby's time in the story has been spent reiterating over and over that Ruby cannot just be an idol who imitates Ai and that to truly shine, she needs to step out of her mom's shadow and shine in her own way. Ruby even literally tells Kana in no uncertain terms in 137 - "I'll be a star in my own way. I won't be like Mama."
While this has always been the text of the story, as I've pointed out before, the actual art with which Ruby's idolhood depicts her basically just as Ai 2.0. It relies so heavily on mining the imagery of Ai's charisma and personality as an idol and using them as the measure of Ruby's success as an idol that Ruby essentially has no visual or conceptual identity of her own as an idol. She's just Ai, But Arbitrarily Better, For Reasons The Narrative Fails To Actually Establish But Hopes That You Just Accept Anyway. This was always kind of annoying, but now that friction seems to have been resolved by… just making her Ai 2.0, But Arbitrarily Better (etc, etc) in the text as well. The fact that we're given no further insight as to Ruby's feelings and continue to just have Akane Explain Ruby's Character Arc to the camera also doesn't help.
All this combines to make the Dome concert and the final few pages feel exceptionally cold in a way I really don't think was intended by Akasaka. Yes, that splash page was nice and flashy but… I just felt nothing. I have no idea if or why Ruby cares about this. And even though the Dome concert has been hyped up through the entire story as the peak of Ruby's achievements as an idol, I feel no sense of accomplishment in her finally being there - not just because her journey to it was basically sneezed at us across two panels, but because it just feels hollow as a victory lap for Ruby. Again, she feels so distant and abstracted as a character that I can't bring myself to feel very strongly about her good or bad.
I think the perfect encapsulation of this are the final four pages of the story. Ruby's words here are very clearly intended to be a callback to Ai's words to Gorou in chapter one but as @all-of-her-light pointed out in our initial discussions of the chapter, Ruby very much does not have an equivalent to Ai's conclusion that she nevertheless wants and values the opportunity to find personal happiness and fulfillment outside of being an idol. Are we supposed to believe that simply being an idol is all that Ruby needs to achieve a similar degree of happiness and fulfillment? Is there no more to her than that?
I've seen a lot of people interpret this ending as exceptionally bleak and, as usual, gleefully predicting Ruby's immanent suicide because her beloved oniichansensei isn't around but this is indulging in, if you'll allow me to be frank, some pretty transparently ship-motivated flanderization. Despite what certain sections of the fandom would like to believe, Aqua and Ruby's lives, past and current, have never revolved around each other to the exclusion of every other relationship in their life. Ruby has a massive support network of people who love and care for her and actively want her to get back on her feet. I can one hundred percent believe that she does not need Aqua in her life to be happy and content.
The issue is that we don't see enough of Ruby to understand that ourselves. Again, she has become such a distant figure with so little insight into what she's thinking and why that this ending is basically a Rorschach test in which you can interpret basically whatever the hell you want or assume because we have so little canon basis to support or debunk our assumptions.
and yes. don't think i didn't see them. it IS both grimly hilarious and weirdly tonally appropriate for this ending that ruby has a bunch of oshi goods of ai and aqua including their fucking autographs set up to say goodbye to every day.
AND…… WE'RE DONE!!! THAT'S OSHI NO KO, BABY!!!! well, technically, there's going to be a 20 page extra chapter in volume 16 but I don't see it being big or substantive enough to meaningfully change my feelings about the ending so… I guess we're leaving it here. Damn. Feels crazy to be done with it.
I'll probably do a bigger post down the line about my thoughts on the ending as a whole but in terms of just How This Chapter Made Me feel, I guess the word is just… meh! It's definitely not an ending I like and I think the execution is sloppy and rushed but I also just don't really have the energy to feel angry about it. Maybe that's sad in its own way but tbh… I still really love Oshi no Ko! I still find it engaging and I find the characters I enjoy rewarding to talk about. I like the artistry of the anime adaptation. I don't blame anybody else for being so turned off by this ending that they're done with the series but for me, I like what I like about OnK too much that this ending could retroactively ruin it for me. Whatever else happens with the OnK franchise, whatever directions the anime and live-action take, this will always be the series that gave me Ai and the Hoshino family and. look at me. look at what she's done to my brain. could I really ask for anything more than that?
That being said, I'm definitely not done with discussing the series! I have fics to write (including a VERY exciting large scale project lined up with some friends), my Ai analysis post to finish and I also want to do a re-read of the series and finish my anime rewatch. I'll be here to discuss Oshi no Ko as long as I have things to say about it and as long as you guys will have me! Despite how the series ended, I've had a genuinely wonderful experience in the fandom and I really don't want to let go of the little community we've built together just because the series is done. I'm Ai's fan for all eternity!!!
#oshi no ko#oshi no posting#onk spoilers#chapter reviews#IT ALL... RETURNS..... TO NOTHING....#IT ALL COMES#TUMBLING DOWN TUMBLING DOWN#TUMBLING DOOOOOWN
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Now you've got me thinking about the Deltarune shops... err, sorry, "seaps" and what they could perhaps tell us about the nature of the nested realities. Somebody mentioned Gerson's shop in Undertale, and about how he boasts that you can't touch him in a No Mercy playthrough because the shop's interface doesn't allow for it, and that makes me wonder if these "seaps" are in fact another instance of a nested reality within the dark worlds.
Consider the shops that exist in Deltarune. In their most pared-back forms, they consist of a menu interface, a background decal of some kind, and a shopkeeper. These three elements together comprise the space that we call a shop. A flattened space where we are unable to control Kris to the same degree that we can outside. In fact, everything is very constrained within this "space", including the shopkeepers themselves.
A shopkeeper thus stands outside of the typical gameplay rules of Deltarune's dark worlds, similarly to how Gerson is unable to be killed in Undertale. While in that space, the shopkeeper is for all intents and purposes a part of the scenery; a talking, posing backdrop giving context to the process of exchanging dark dollars for items. Their movements and abilities are heavily restricted to just a small looping animation. But when they exit that space, those entities are once again subject to the normal "rules" of the dark world - they exist in what we might charitably call three dimensions, they are able to exert (slightly) more agency upon the world, and crucially, the world/narrative is able to exert its agency more directly upon them. Think about Rouxls Kaard as a prime example of this - untouchable in his shop, very much a sopping wet failure outside of it.
Now let's consider Spamton's, err... "shop". You have your three components of a shop here, albeit in a heavily-glitched state, and you can do all the typical shop-type activities - buy items, talk to Spamton, run away... all the usual things you'd do in a shop of any kind. But here we see an example of a shop-space requiring a shopkeeper to continue existing properly, when we upload Spamton into the Empty Disk and the shop just... breaks. Stops working. We can still enter and exit this space, but it is for all intents and purposes completely dead. And to be clear, I don't think this is a case of "anyone else could step in and take the role of shopkeeper" - I think that a shop and its keeper are in effect one-and-the-same, the space existing as a living, breathing extension of that character. No-one else could possibly run Spamton's shop in his absence, because no-one else IS Spamton.
Question is, why does Spamton even have a shop in the first place? Or, to be more precise, why can't we just use the Empty Disk on Spamton outside of his shop? And I think the answer to that question is that the properties of the shop-space is the best way for Spamton to upload himself. He literally takes up less space - he has no model, no collision, no position in three-dimensional space. Think of it like rolling up a poster versus attempting to stuff a sofa into a suitcase. And the interface allows him to sell you the object you need to access the Disk, then provide the options necessary to execute that transfer, while at the same time minimising Spamton's risk of coming to harm - even if Queen's forces could find his shop, it's unlikely they'd be able to evict him from that space, if the Gerson example earlier is anything to go by.
Further, it's likely that attempting such a feat in the dark world proper just wouldn't work. Characters can insert themselves into Kris's pocket as items (which you could perhaps consider an extension or offshoot of "shop-space"), but taking Spamton himself as an item does not work for his purposes. And perhaps you COULD somehow insert Spamton into the Empty Disk through Kris's inventory, but crucially Spamton would not be the one orchestrating the process there - we would. And knowing us utdr players, we'd probably find all sorts of silly things to do with him instead, where he'd be entirely at our mercy. Him being able to control how and when he uploads himself, through the medium of his personal shop-space, ensures that his plan can't be interfered with by morbidly-curious players.
And now, finally, we can come to the "seap" in question. Using the framework of "shop-space" defined above, I think we can confidently answer what Seam means when he says "as long as I stay in this shop, these walls won't change!". As we've seen with Spamton, removing a shopkeeper from its shop effectively "kills" that space, rendering it completely inert, so it's likely that Seam is being entirely literal when he says that. It's also worth thinking about the assertion that a shop acts as an extension of its shopkeeper, so that when Seam is moved from the abandoned classroom to the storage closet, his entire shop moves with him. You can't have one without the other.
Further, being ensconced in shop-space like this suits his character very well, as it allows him to exist at a remove from the main dark worlds, and justifies his position of passive nihilism in the face of what he sees as an inevitable apocalypse - he cannot act upon the world, but at the same time the world cannot act upon him. Whether the protective/restrictive confines of his shop-space would actually serve to protect him from the brunt of said apocalypse remains to be seen... and I'm not certain he cares one way or the other, right now.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk about shop-space in Deltarune. I hope any of that made a lick of sense, I came up with it literally just now, so it might not be the most coherent thing you ever read. But thanks for inspiring me to think on the topic! :D
on the shopic (shop topic) of seam, something that drives me bonkers but that i have absolutely zero theories on is the line "as long as i stay in this shop, these walls won't change!" it feels significant to me.
in chapter 1, the entrance to the seap seems to be sewn into the fabric of the dark world itself, it's really weird.
and in chapter 2, while all of the rest of castle town's new buildings have their own unique shape, seam's seap is just shaped like the building that preceded it, just with some redecorating
(i love the way it looks btw. very cute.)
but when the shop changes locations, while the outside changes shape, the inside stays exactly the same. hence "these walls won't change", most likely.
and also, as soon as spamton leaves his shop, the wall behind him gets unpainted, and the table with the telephone on it disappears.
but i don't know what to make of any of this. like it feels like they must be trying to tell us something with all these little bits and pieces but i have no idea what
#rb#deltarune#seam deltarune#deltarune analysis#deltarune theory#deltarune speculation#shop-space#or should that be “seap-space”?#Eh we'll work on it in post
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Pengu Finale Liveblog ahhhhhh
Julian just absolutely brain blasting this old woman
Oh Rex is close enough to call her doll and make her breakfast he is not beating the deadbeat daddy allegation
OH NO DOES SHE KNOW OH MY GOD SHE KNOWS
NEVERMIND I WAS SO WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING SHE HAS KNOWN ALL ALONG
holy shit holy shit holy shit
okay so they did find the bodies eventually holy fuck hooooooly fuck
oh my god rex literally teaching francis how to manipulate oz and use him oh my god ohhhhh my god this is so much more of a betrayal than if francis had just hated him for what he'd done
she knew all along she knew all along and she used him and she
she
oz was right ahahahahah every relationship in his life is fuckign transactional because he KILLED THE ONLY TWO BOYS WHO TRULY LOVED HIM, AND KILLED HIS MOTHER'S LOVE WITH THEM
dude he has to kill his mother now
this is a psychological nuke the likes of which i think sofia could not possibly have ever imagined.
Francis's FACE oh my god.
Julian baby boy maybe Sofia should stand out of sight to not break immersion
God this is absolutely not how hypnotism works is it
IT'LL BE EASIER NOW YOU LITTLE PSYCHO
"I see you in ways other people don't" while she is ACTIVELY USING HIM
dude. dude. I just. It's always the same with Oz, isn't it. Sofia, Eve, his mom. He's the biggest bullshitter in Gotham, and he's so full of it he doesn't have a clue how to sniff it out
God they are both so horrific to each other. Just his horrible cycle of selfishness and toxicity what a twisted family they are
HELLO VIC I MISSED YOU
Oh rip lmao I guess the gangs know the bliss is all gone
Vic baby he's saying all the same stuff oz does, only he believes it, so he can't bullshit people to his side
Oh hey that dude on the other side of the walkie talkie lived!!
Man Oz and Sofia haven't been face to face since ep 4 hahahaha
BERTO MENTION. she hasn't used that name in a hot second
Oh my god Sofia literally using that bird nest metaphor ahahahh whoever that anon was in my inbox you are a genius
Man. Sofia literally just laying out all their horrible family drama in the worlds worst family therapy oh my god
Dude I've been saying for weeks now that Sofia's superpower is to completely shatter people with the truth and. ohhhhhh my god ohhhhhh my god ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Wait. Is Sofia going to give that cigar cutter in her cleavage to Francis to use on Oz. I think she should give it to her.
Uh. Nevermind
Wow Sofia really is leaning into this evil therapy thing what the fuck. girl.
God i desperately want her to be the girl-jonkler running the aslume at the end of this show please please please
Also Sofia, I think it was the left. I mean I'm sure she knows just so she can do the other one next, but. man. she is fuckin sadistic. im love....
Julian so enthusiastic about all of this hahaahah
I love Sofia like, almost framing this to them or possibly herself as a gift she is giving to Francis. Is this cope? Is this something she sincerely believes? Or is she just being cruel?
I ALREADY FUCKIN KNOW
It's my finger you spineless prick hahahaahha but that doesn't matter to him because its your love he wants it's your adoration your pride and what actually happens to you? Doesn't fucking matter.
I NEVER STOPPED HATING YOU
Sofia's face right then like. damn dude. god i love her
She had enough love for all of them and he soured every last drop of it. For them, for him, for the world.
Sofia really does know the value of just letting a drama play out.
Francis saying Sofia is right this ep, Sofia saying Francis was right last ep, damn.
Oz really is... the only character in this show chronically incapable of learning
Damn mama cobb strong enough to smash a bottle. I don't think even i could do that.
Oh my god no wonder she said "they look at me like i'm not even theirs" because in her mind, she let their murderer go free
also is oz gonna hulk out that she's showing love to an imaginary jack and benny when oz has just seen her hate?
Oh is she just dying right now
Julian doing the get down mr president
MR DETECTIVE YOU DIPSHIT
Sofia baby you did great okay you already hurt Oz please just go to italy with your boy toy
Wow is he not getting this fucking stab looked at
EW EW EW EW
Yeah sure sure. Sofia stabbed you. Sure. Sure.
Oh noooo. Vic... baby.... he is such a believer in Oz's stupid self serving bullshit. He is so good. And pure. And he speaks from the heart and. And Oz acts like this is something Vic rehearsed
And they laugh about it but Vic doesn't understand. He doesn't understand that Oz isn't giving him advice on how to most effectively show people the fire you hold in your heart—he's teaching him the art of smoke and mirrors. how to con and grift and bullshit until even you don't know what's true and real
Christ. Vic is so fucking dead
She'd never look at me again unless i get this done.
Oz knowing now that this love is transactional. And fine. He'll make that transaction, he'll take down sofia and then maybe his mom will pretend again that she doesn't hate him, doesn't want him dead
it's not going to work, of course. it can't because this show is about him becoming the penguin. and it can't, because even that transaction was always a lie Francis told herself
I don't think she could ever have loved Oz even if he'd gotten her into a penthouse at age 20. I think she lied to herself to survive living with him, because what was the alternative? Losing all three of her boys?
AHAHAHAHAHAH SOFIA LITERALLY PICKING UP OZ'S GOLD SUMMIT MEMBERS i have to say. I did not anticipate this at ALL
damn girlie really is just gonna dip to go to italy or wherever
sofia really is just setting up the funniest game of capture the flag imaginable while cramming like seven olives in her mouth
i dont' say this often. i desire her carnally.
The gun in the glove compartment surely that will not come back later
Oz originally checking his image in the reflection of the car vs asking Vic now, treating this kid as his reflection
Damn. Is Link really going to fall for Oz's shit again after that truck of cigs thing? Or is this just a ploy to get Oz into the right place for Sofia to pick him up?
Actually maybe that's what loses Vic, that Link betrayed him, and Oz expected it. Idk we shall see
Penguin planning to run for mayor in a couple movies?
Oh Oz is totally gonna send sofia to arkham ahahaha poor baby
Oh my god I thought Sofia was gonna claim credit for Sal's death, not that Oz would give it up himself
I cannot tell you guys how fucking tempting it is to skip right to the end of this episode to see if i'm right you guys
Wow Oz really eyeing that Mayor's office
Is he going to kill Bella and frame Sofia. Is he gonna kill bella and THAT is what turns Vic on him.
oh my god LINK
HAHAHAH I WAS SO RIGHT SHE IS BURNING DOWN FALCONE MANOR
oh god that's the watch Sofia gave him for his birthday FUCK YOU CARMINE
Sofia really is gonna fucking screw over EVERYONE hahaha THREE CIGS BABY
oh god she is so hot i love her you self actualize through arson baybeeeeeeee
that shot of her throwing the cig like a dart is so much oh my god
babygirl i love you
you deserve the world
but yeah she is going into the cold according to the needle drop. definitely going back to arkham
... what's in the trunk. i don't think it's normal luggage. is it more bombs
there is still 20 mins left. i am afraid
This is clearly a trap for someone i just don't know who. Where is vic
I'm so afraid this is the last we get to see of Sofia.
She knows. She always has such a nose for bullshit lmao. Also fuck you Link you gotta know Oz is gonna stab you in the back.
I do think it's promising that Julian has not been seen all day tho. What is he doing.
I love this. I love that Oz and Sofia finally get this one moment to be truly honest with each other.
Well. At the very least, Oz gets to be honest with Sofia. idk that he knows how to be honest with himself anymore.
Why does this look like a chemical factory. I know it's not happening but it'd be so funny for Sofia to become the joker right now.
just dunk her in the goop
Man. Is he actually going to shoot her. Police pls come and save my girl. Cannot believe that's what I'm begging for now.
oh my god
yeah i called it but. Man. This is so painful to watch. also i think my julian prayers are not going to be answered it did not look like Sofia had planned any of this
okay i'm normal about sofia being arrested now.
Okay. I'm normal.
I'm back to not being normal francis and vic and oz all in one place this is all gonna blow up emotionally
Is francis in a coma. is she totally brain dead oh my god.
oh man she really is never going to say she loves him hahaha
she let jack and benny's murderer go and it never got her anything
is he gonna kill her now.
TELL ME YOU'RE PROUD OF ME oz you fuckin
he's so fucking delusional jesus putting her hand on his head
dude. is Vic actually gonna live through this episode
holy fuck
did not call that in the least
well. i was right about the pyrrhic victory for Oz
"All kinds of things" shut the fuck up.
God. I cannot believe Vic is living through this show. Admittedly as the kind of guy that his parents would have been ashamed of, but.
Wait. No no
don't
don't do it
no nondfonfodnfodnfodfn
please dont
pelase dont
oz don't you dare
nONONNNONONONONONONONONONONONO
PLEASE DOJNT DO IT NOW PLEAE
NO NO HE IS THEO NLY ONE WHO HAS SEEN THE WEAKNESS AND HUMAN IN YOU
OZ YOU
OZ
NO
WITH YOUR HANDS???? WITH YOUR FUCKIGN HANDS???? I THOUGHT HE WOUDL PULL A GUN AT LEAST YOU FUCKING
ODSOFANDFONSODNOSDAGNOGNIOAGDSASGJDISGNAGLNFGOSANFOSDO
SANO
NON NO NONONONO
VIC
vic. vic. vic barely lived a month longer than his family
all that good heart and he just. enabled a monster to rise to power. to make gotham worse
HE'S MUGGING HIM
YOU PIECE OF SHIT YOU PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT YOU BASTARD YOU
i
i
and the water takes him too.
JULIAN
oH MY GOD I WAS RIGHT AHHAAHHAHAHA
JULIAN
I WAS RIGHT ABOUT SOFIA GETTING MARRIAGE PROPOSALS HAHAHAHAHAH
SELINA KYLE???????? HELLO??????????????
bro.... oh my god..... this is....
I'm so happy.........
sofia smiling... sofia finding a new family member....
nvm i am so glad my original theories were wrong this is way better than anything i could have hoped for
oh my god
ohhhhh my god he actually is keeping his mom in a vegetative state.... exactly what she begged him not to do.......
she knows.... she knows... some part of her is aware in there ahahahahah
you should have let Rex kill him all those years ago
oh my god EVE???? EVE GIRL GET OUT BEFORE HE KILLS YOU TOO
oh no please tell me he never learned what happened with sofia and eve
hes literally just calling her ma. fuck me. mayeb that means eve is safe for now
NOT THE BATSIGNAL
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ugh sometimes watching Kab pov I get real sympathetic for how difficult it must be to be in her brain and just be so confused all the time and exhausted about masking her feelings to make other people trust her and her pain in wanting to be vulnerable and receive vulnerability and feel deep reciprocal love.
But then she says shit, really fucking mean and toxic shit towards mental health and healing and it triggers my own fight or flight and i become a ball of rage.
And like, I do get it. When you start your journey of mental health healing you often become the toxic one as you throw the shit people have said to you at everyone who also has similar mental health issues as you. (been there done that) Doing it to process your own rage at being told these things, or thinking, out of desperation, that if you can just get them to fix themselves quickly, you can fix yourself quickly. The bullied becomes the bully.
But then time passes and you realize this shit is hard to overcome. (or maybe it won't ever be overcome! and that's okay!) And you stop being toxic and you start being compassionate, to yourself and others. And eventually you start to heal and become confident in your own self worth and the validity of your emotions.
But before then it's the fucking worst place to watch someone be in. And that place is unfortunately where we are right now.
below is a short transcript of the convo this reflection is based off of. it can be triggering so like, don't feel obliged to read it.
11/10/24 kab vod: "I have no idea what's happening"
1:42:00 KAB: “what about how he makes me feel? Why is it so important what he feels and to accommodate everything he’s feeling? Why do i have to conceded to that???”
1:44:00 “I’m sick of having to accommodate to everyone else’s actions”
realizing your masking is hurting you is one of the worst realizations (imo). bc the mask keeps you safe, but if you can't process or give worth to your real emotions, it's not serving you.
so she swaps from processing her own feeling to being angry at zam.
1:47:00 She gets he needs time and space, but “We don't have time for to try and sit and process your emotions properly. Do it after we deal with this fucking issue [...] sometimes you just need to toughen up”
Fucking hell the trigger i just felt for just toughen up.
1:48:00 “i need to know what he’s thinking so that we can work together. In a team!”
what team!?!
“‘Does zam really hate communication more than he likes spawn and the server’ literally. Like pick your priorities dude.”
I’m going to fucking throw up. Because yes. Actually yes. Unfortunately and actually yes. He's gotten a lot better but like.
1:53:00 “I dunno. I wish he would care about himself as much as i care about him. Hard to see him like this [pause] maybe he does need more nurturing than i can give him bro ugh. I am just not- i am not good at that shit. I think it’s stupid [..] when you have a job to do [..] just shove your emotions away for a bit. And then you can process them later”
I was going to say this is just eclipse, but I just realized that maybe it's just this is exactly the perception Zam had of Vi: that Vi just wanted him to move on when he couldn't. All his deepest fears of what Vi wanted from him are being personified into a new person.
(also he is shoving his emotions away and that's why he's not processing it and giving you an answer for why he "doesn't know"????? but since he's not a perfect ball of joy and masking to you and because he is doing what you can't (shove emotions away) you are in rage)
1:54:00 “But it’s like, while there’s a life or death situation that literally determines the entire server we don't have time to be like, holding your hand, you know? Like, you're an adult” ughh fuck. being broken is inconvenient for others and age is seen as an invalidation to any of your real brokenness. If you're old you no longer have the right to be broken. Can we please change this narrative? thx
“If he cared enough he would actively try and do something to help himself in this situation”
Interesting choice of words to say "he would try to help himself if he cared" complaining about others not "working" on themselves (and you can never know if someone is working on themselves bc you're not in their brain) helps nobody bc you can only control yourself.
“You just want to sit and feel bad about yourself” no that's what you're doing kab
“He got me to fucking open up to him and pour my heart out and is now turning his back on that entirely. That’s what i’m actually more upset about”
oh the naive belief that because you pour your heart out to someone they must reciprocate. That is the risk you take when you are honest with someone about your feelings. They are at no obligation to reciprocate ever. Never ever. But that doesn't mean your feelings aren't true and it doesn't mean you shouldn't have done it. Love is a risk.
But also she feels she was forced into it. Forced to be vulnerable and she hates the vulnerability. She doesn't remember (or believe) that Zam promised to not use it against her. She isn't willing to give him the chance to not use it against her. He simply knows and that is a threat.
So love turns into spite. Instantly. And she doesn't want to talk to him anymore. And decides that she will just be fake to him.
oh girl. keeping the mask on doesn't help anything.
“I’ve lost a lot of respect for him today. I’m done trying to impress him”
and so the mask returns. and healing stops.
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What do you think of the order? Do you think their operations were effective? Do you think they were incompetent?
I don't think the Order is incredibly competent, but they're not the most incompetent they could be. Like, it could be worse.
Like, in the first war, we know they were so incompetent that Peter was able to spy on them for a year with none of them realizing it. Almost all of them died in the final years of the war to Death Eaters with only, like, 2 DE that were killed by the order in the 1st war.
In the second war, they start out with the same level of incompetence. In OotP they don't do shit until the battle in the ministry and even then a 15-year-old Harry holds his own against the Death Eaters better than most of the Order. I mean, they try to say public opinion and are failing with Harry & Hermion's interview doing much more than the Order did all of that year. Also, they clearly failed at guarding the prophecy because there wasn't a guard there the one day Harry was lured in there. They also failed at guarding Harry since he got attacked by dementos.
Year 5, is all around Order of the Phoenix failures.
In HBP, they literally do nothing. Like Voldemort is out in the open, Death Eaters are attacking muggles, and the Order are at their most useless, not doing shit to stop them. Because Dumbledore can't reveal to Voldemort Snape is a spy, he can't have his people know to intercept the DE without giving up his spy. There's a good reason for the uselessness, but they still are useless.
In book 7, you actually have the Order doing shit. (Surprisingly, the moment Dumbledore died, they got more useful). Like, they did a decent job hiding people from the DE and running their underground news channel to get out the word that disagrees with the ministry. Like, they didn't attack the DE or their operations until the Battle of Hogwarts in a physical way, but they did fight the propaganda and information of the DE. They are fighting with information and moral, which can be just as important (if not more so sometimes). Swaying the public opinion and showing there is an alternative is important.
Honestly, I've been saying for years Snape is the most competent member of the Order and the DE. He's basically running this war on both sides and both sides would be more useless without him. I mean, he's the most reliable informant on the enemy for both Dumbledore and Voldemort in the second war and he plays his part incredibly competently.
So, when I say the Order is incompetent, I'm talking about it as an organization because there are competent individuals within it.
#harry potter#hp#hp meta#asks#anonymous#hollowedtheory#harry potter meta#the order of the phoenix#first wizarding war#second wizarding war
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ok depresso week is over, back to deliberate hyperfixation on bg3:
It is absolutely wild to me that people take Astarion to the foursome with the drow twins (romanced, spawn, post-cazador) and are shocked, shocked I tell you, that he has a bad time. But it leads me to think that there's an interesting conversation to be had here about morality applied to video games. I'm going to be using what's a bit of a strawman tbh, what I would consider an archetypical, "good person" gamer for this niche example.
(3k essay under the cut about irl morals vs video game behavior, my take on why Astarion agrees to the orgy, beating the dead horse of Astarion discourse now that the fandom has cooled off enough I might not get flogged for it, and all my election stress being translated into an increasingly bitchy narrative voice that I hope is at least mildly amusing.)
"Good Person Gamer" romances Astarion. They're probably female, which I am mentioning exclusively so I can turn that into "Good Girl Gamer" 😏, or G3. G3 picks nice dialogue options. G3 tries to support their companions, and finds diplomatic and moral solutions to problems. G3 saved the tieflings. G3 still romances Astarion because he's hot, and vulnerable, and it's not like he forces you to be evil - he just complains a bit when you save kittens stuck in trees, but you get that approval back anyway just by being nice to him. Talk him out of Ascension and you've proven to yourself he's got a good soul under all that attitude anyway. He'd healed! You banged on his grave! It's all good now!
The brothel is fun. The drow twins are hot. It's always fun when games lets you do spicy things like have threesomes and orgies! We're sex-positive! Look, the drow twins said they love their job! It's totally fine! G3, as most people, probably does not do these things in real life, but that's the fun in video games: you get to be someone you're not.
And then Astarion noticeably dissociates. He throws himself in the center and lavishes everyone with attention; he's a professional, you know. Even an unromanced Tav/Durge notices something's off, and Astarion replies something along the lines of "you don't have the right to look at me like that," presumably with worry, distress, or sympathy.
G3 is upset. They did everything right - they didn't want to hurt him, and Astarion himself said he wanted this. Why couldn't they stop midway through and remind him that he doesn't have to hurt himself? Why couldn't they talk about it afterwards, and clear the air? LARIAN WHY DO YOU HURT ME
Now, to all the G3's out there: if you were dating a person with extensive sexual trauma, having been raped literally thousands of times, would you suggest having a threesome/orgy? With prostitutes, if that's better or worse? Putting them on the spot before your mutual friends? Would you wait a few years to mention the idea, or would you do so only weeks/months into a relationship? Your first "I love you" might have only been yesterday.
And most people, I think, would say "No." Writing that scenario outside of the lens of a video game makes it sound insane - of course you wouldn't! I'm not saying that they should never have group sex or that it can't be done, but I think most people instinctively get how that would be a shitty thing to do in that context, especially without discussing it in depth beforehand and making sure you're both on the same page.
And this is the meat of the issue. Most gamers play good-aligned characters: there's a strong culture of wanting to play the hero and saving the day. But tied into that cultural monomyth, in society itself, is the idea that sex is a reward at the end. You get sex at the end of the romance arc. The date where you have sex is one of many milestones, and you're not really dating if you haven't done it yet. Some people don't have sex until their wedding night. Threesome scenes especially are a video game classic: old-school God of War, for instance, had a hidden room in every game with scantily-clad women just waiting for you to button-mash away, a little treat for the player's keen puzzle-solving abilities.
Not all romances in BG3 have sex or end with sex, (some even start with sex), but that is because BG3's character writing tries to ground itself in reality despite being a medium people utilize for fantasy. Role-playing a "good" character is mostly easy: you typically know which dialogue choice is the ethical choice, can chide Astarion for being racist, can save the numerous children with moral ease - and BG3 rewards this: a good playthrough is more fleshed out, because you haven't killed off half the cast. You get better gear. You have more allies, better allies. You know what to do.
Or, well, mostly. BG3 is kind of special imo because even the good choices have a lot of nuance, where two people can make different choices but still feel like they both picked the most ethical one. Take Shadowheart's parents, for example: they beg for her to let them go so they can die and save their daughter. Saving them leaves Shadowheart in Shar's clutches - she will experience pain for the rest of her life, but regains her parents, and with luck, Selûne will claim her soul when she dies. Kill them, and Shadowheart is free - truly free, to live her life on her own terms, free from Shar and Selûne both. Both can be the ethical choice, depending on your morals.
"But if Astarion didn't want to have the threesome, the game should have let me stop midway through/made it clearer that this would happen. He said no before Cazador - why couldn't he say no again? Why would Larian put me in this position and make me feel bad when I thought everything was alright? I wanted to be good and have fun, not feel like I pressured my boyfriend." - Strawman G3.
Because BG3 treats it's characters like people. Multiple companions make choices outside of what the player character decides for them - Shadowheart's decision to save or kill her parents, kill or save the Nightsong, or Gale, to go for the crown or not depend on what events they are there to witness personally, or can be informed by conversations you have in camp about unrelated issues. You can fully let them make their own decisions and be surprised each time as they develop into different people with each successive playthrough. A lot of people are surprised when Gale goes for the Crown of Karsus without their input. In my last multiplayer playthrough, we could not prevent Shadowheart from wanting to kill the Nightsong, and so we were forced to kill her.
Astarion is not like that. The way he talks about Ascension changes depending on your relationship. If you're merely friends, he acknowledges it's probably a bad idea, even, in direct contrast to the somewhat obsessive and frightening way he pursues it in a romantic relationship. But Astarion can't decide what to do at the end: he has no hidden point system, no hidden flags - he will always pursue Ascension even if he knows it's a bad idea, because Astarion does not trust himself, has no experience trusting himself, and needs help. As counter-intuitive as it may sound, he needs support to make his own decisions, because in that moment, he cannot be objective.
(If Astarion is ever objective is another story....)
So much of Astarion's reactions and opinions are instinctive and unthinking. "Don't let the pixie out of the lantern, are you an idiot?" -> "A pixie! And honest-to-goodness pixie! *giggles*"
"We don't need a urchin hanging around." -> Astarion approves if you help Yenna
etc. etc. etc. There's so many times he says one thing, the cruel thing, the "fuck everyone else, I've got mine"-thing, and then approves when you do the good thing. Astarion does not live in line with his values (besides pursuing a growing need for freedom) and he frankly does not really know what his values even are.
Astarion doesn't react with glee to finding all the people he seduced - who inadvertently raped him, though they didn't know, some lowlifes and scoundrels and people having a bad day and even some sweet, naive virgins like Sebastian, who took that smoking hot Elf on his word and followed him home, probably in disbelief someone so gorgeous would pay them any attention at all - tortured and locked in a dungeon underground. He's crushed by guilt. He's in pain. Astarion delights in you causing others pain (the torture scene) because it aligns with his worldview, the joy of seeing someone else suffer for once. But he's not a cold-hearted murderer. (And yes, I am differentiating between "adventurer kills a bandit" murder and "deliberately killing someone you know for reasons/no reason" murder.) He doesn't hurt anyone in camp - Shadowheart and Lae'zel are far more dangerous than him. You never have to stop him from drinking anyone else to death. Even if you never feed him again, never use his bite attack, he never bites anyone in camp. Despite being a vampire, Astarion is, effectively, harmless. (Bite night was about checking whether or not Cazador's old command's still worked. It's his first real attempt at freedom, proving to himself that he's free from compulsion. Hence why the roll to get him to stop is a 5, giving you a 75% likelihood of succeeding. He doesn't actually want to kill you. And you get two chances!!!)
Astarion doesn't enjoy death for the sake of death. He's terrified if you side with the goblins and kill the tieflings despite goading you into doing it. I don't doubt that he could hurt others (god knows he's got enough feelings to work out that way), but there's a significant difference between a little knife play and condemning thousands of people to be tortured in the Hells for all eternity. Sacrificing his siblings is different, because they, like him, are guilty, and deserve their deaths. He agrees to sacrifice his fellow spawn as an act of self hatred, of self harm. But all those other people stupid enough to want to sleep with him? Given a day to think about it, I think Astarion would agree that that's not right - and that's why he thanks you for preventing his Ascension. That much murder isn't him. He can be thoughtless, cruel, and unkind, but Astarion isn't a psychopath.
Take him to the brothel, and slipping back into that role, the seductive rake, it as easy as breathing. I don't think Astarion has ever thought about if he's the type of person to enjoy group sex, or even if he wants it. I don't doubt that Astarion enjoys sex, that he wants to have sex (he is, after all that, still shockingly horny), but he's just discovered the idea of having sex with someone he loves. He's riding that high. Of course he says yes: not only is he a different man now (he's free!), it's something he's done a thousand times already - maybe it'll be different this time, maybe something has changed - or maybe, an orgy was on offer, so of course Astarion is there. It's his purpose. He's been doing it for 200 years. Where else would he be?
What I'm saying is that Astarion didn't think about what sleeping with the drow twins meant for your relationship, or how he would feel about it at all. He just went for it. He had a bad time. You then don't discuss it because that would mean admitting that he finally made a choice by himself and it backfired. He didn't think, or maybe he did, and it turns out he just doesn't know himself. Why discuss it? A relationship with G3 apparently means group sex. They probably asked twice. They backtracked all the way to Wyrm's Crossing post-Cazador. Will they ask again? How many times can he say no?
In reality, in the real world, the act of asking can be the problem in and of itself. If your significant other/spouse/lover asks you to do something you don't want to do, be it a threesome, anal, opening the relationship etc, these actions have consequences. The act of asking doesn't happen in a vacuum like it does in video games: there is a cost associated with it, a gamble, and while it may pay off, it may not. Some people get worn down and agree to things they don't want to do. Sometimes you break up because the act of asking is so inherently disrespectful you can't reconcile your differing wants and needs. If you're dating someone who has experienced the gut-wrenching pain of being cheated on, you don't ask 2 months into a new relationship if you can fuck other people. This should not come as a surprise to you, to G3, to anyone. It's common sense.
BG3 giving you the opportunity for a foursome with Astarion not only to give the player their hot'n'spicy sex scene (then playfully bops you on the nose by making it a fade-to-black, you naughty little perverts, you), but also to continue its theme of treating the player like a mature adult, who is dealing with other mature adults, and who can and should live with the consequences of their own actions. Subsequent patches have watered this down, I admit, but I do believe that that was the ethos guiding their work from the beginning. BG3 wants you to interact with the characters like people. If you roll over and tell them what they want to hear, you will Ascend Astarion, and he'll enslave you in turn. If you agree with Gale on everything, he will kill himself and you - or, he'll become a god, becoming the exact sort of god he used to rail against. Agree with Karlach, and she will rather die than go back to the Hells. You get my point.
"But Larian could have let me check in on Astarion midway through. Maybe it was a mistake to ask, but they should have let me check on him and stop it all if he wanted. I was trying to trust him to make his own decisions." - Strawman G3
Ok. We add a dialogue option. "Astarion, love, are you alright? We can stop at any time if you want."
Astarion disapproves (-5)
He's not backing out. Thank you for asking, darling, but fuck off. (I don't think he'd actually say fuck off but the implicit message would be there. I can't see Astarion stopping midway through, nor appreciating you doubting him. Nothing changes.)
"But I still feel bad." - Strawman G3
And I completely understand that. It's a video game. Don't worry! Of course you should get your sex scene - it's a reward! You got their approval high enough! You have enough charisma points! In DA:O, you can also have an orgy, unlocked by giving your companions enough gifts! It's a game! You have enough points, you get the thing!!! You killed Cazador - you win! Have your cake and eat it too! Congrats, you unlocked your hot slutty vampire elf who's basically a trained courtesan, who needs you to be his moral compass, who will never leave you so long as you don't actively rape him - enjoy all the fun orgies in your future!
Your actual choice - the choice the game gives you - is to realize that taking what's essentially a human trafficking victim to a brothel is a dumb idea, but they didn't want to punish you for it.
"Well, Astarion should have said something then. He said no before, he can say no again." - Strawman G3
If you go through life pushing peoples boundaries and expect them to verbally tell you what you're doing wrong, you're gonna be friendless and have a bad time. This ties back to both Astarion having difficulty knowing and defending his own values, BG3 trying to let you make your own decisions without setting out a clear "good or bad" path on occasion, and the hope that you'd use your own morals to make decisions. G3 would never behave in this way irl, and that's where the shock comes from, the guilt from committing an action they thought was without consequence in a risk-free fantasy scenario, and then feeling unpleasantly surprised when called out.
But it's a video game, and you didn't get the little zap, the little sting of an Astarion disapproves in the corner that told you you made the wrong choice. In fact, because he doesn't disapprove, it's not actually the wrong choice!
It really was mean how the Narrator made G3 feel bad, wasn't it. They didn't mean to hurt him. Astarion doesn't mention it, so it's probably fine.
... have you talked to Halsin yet? Surely he had a good time. Right?
CONCLUSION
People think they're good and moral and will typically behave "heroically" in video games. Games support this and reward players for doing so. The "good path" is expected to be clear. However, video games are not real life no matter how much they play at immersion, and multiple games have trained players in a linear "do x, receive y" type fashion. Sex is a reward in games, and is treated that way in real life as well, so players expect the Sharess' orgy scene to be a reward, and are then shocked when Astarion/Gale/Halsin etc reveal during or afterwards that they had a bad time. This is because Larian wants you to treat BG3 like a role playing game and interact with it seriously, and isn't afraid to boop you for your actions in ways that mimic real life relationships. This ethical dissonance makes people uncomfortable especially when they play games to role-play as someone better than themselves, and are surprised when they aren't herded down predetermined "good" paths via instantaneous approval/disapproval mechanics or unlockable "ideal" dialogue.
It is absolutely possible that someday Astarion might be into meaningless group sex with prostitutes for fun and pleasure. However, that is the sort of thing you'd probably either wait for him to bring up by himself organically, or discuss in a long-term trusting relationship after he's had potentially years to process the idea of not immediately hopping into bed with someone, as well as disentangling his instinctive "beaten-in" sexually available behavior from his actual desires. People much more emotionally mature and undamaged than Astarion have destroyed their own relationships by inadvertently pushing a partner (or themselves) into various forms of group sex or other sexual acts. It's not something you do on a random Tuesday on a whim.
Or maybe it is, and I'm just chronically boring and surrounded by boring people lmao
TO THE POSTER THAT INSPIRED THIS: I'm so so sorry if you ever see this, not trying to call you out at all hence no linking, I just wanted to pick apart why I think you felt that way. The thoughts just finally bubbled over after a year+ lol
#I deliberately waited for discourse to calm down before writing any Astarion essays so be nice pls#I don’t like fighting people on the internet#delta.txt#Astarion#bg3 astarion
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