#listen. i am a simple lesbian. i see moon/sun girls. i like.

[pippims]

but the memories come home

1326 words, very soft and fluffy zoyalina! written for grishaverse sapphic saturdays week 1

Zoya isn't sentimental. But she can't stop staring at Alina under the moonlight and thinking about how much she's missed her. Or; post-canon, Zoya sneaks to Kermazin to visit Alina and Mal.

[ao3]

Zoya had always aligned herself with the moon than the sun. Maybe that was a remnant of the Darkling’s influence, or maybe it was the result of spending nights curled up in a thin wedding gown and staring up at the moon because it was so cold that she felt she’d never sleep. Either way, she’d always thought there was something magical about the full moon.

And this full moon was particularly potent.

There’s an early-fall chill in the air, enough to deepen the boozy tinge on Alina’s cheeks but not enough to be uncomfortable. Around them, frogs and insects scream a bizarre background melody, but after being holed up in the Grand Palace for weeks Zoya finds it vaguely comforting. A reminder of … not better days, not by any mean, but simpler days. She isn’t sure what, but there’s something soothing about laying on her back, staring up at the moon, mind drifting but not lingering on any one thought.

“Sometimes if I need to get away I come out here,” Alina says. Her eyes are closed and her arm is draped over her chest, almost as if she’s asleep. “I like to look at the stars and try to identify them, see if I can find the same ones. I can’t, but I’m still trying.”

It was Zoya’s first visit since Alina’s death. Genya had tailored her to look enough like herself to be familiar, but unlike herself enough that any normal person wouldn’t see Zoya Nazyalensky.   They’d been writing letters, but somehow it just wasn’t enough. Maybe it was the energy from the war that had never quite dissipated, or maybe Zoya just missed her. Either way, she’d decided to go against Nikolai’s wishes and sneak a covert visit.

The three of them had had a very pleasant dinner, for the most part - Mal was really trying to learn how to cook anything fancier than roasted meat, and had done his best to prepare some sort of stuffed rabbit dish with various greens. He hadn’t realized that the recipe book he’d purchased from an elderly woman was ancient, smudged, and half written in Fjerdan. The result was a meal that was somehow both too bland and filled with too many contrasting flavors, but at least the meat was cooked well. But they’d washed it down with lots of laughs and lots of the champagne that Zoya had brought, and then her and Alina had wandered into the woods for some quiet time.

Alina turns her head to look at Zoya, who looks over at her in turn. “How’s the future of Ravka?”

“A dumbass,” she replies, and Alina laughs, the sound echoing off of the trees around them. “Doing his best, but a dumbass.” She neglects to mention the lingering curses. There’s no need to worry her, not after everything she’d gone through. She was dead and free of the Darkling. Besides, this was a friendly visit. Serious business could wait. “How’s retirement?”

Alina snorts. “Quiet. I’ve started drawing, but I’m terrible. I tried to make some bread yesterday, but it didn’t rise. Ended up feeding it to the birds.”

She looks happier  , Zoya thinks. She’s radiant, and not just from the champagne, and not in the frightening way she’d been when using her powers. She looks like a girl, a bit tired, but glowing against the moonlight. Or maybe glowing  from  the moonlight?  She looks just as good in the moonlight as she does in the sunlght , she thinks, but then banishes the thought. “And your retirement partner?”

She doesn’t respond immediately, and instead she turns her head back to the sky. Her eyes drift shut again, and Zoya can’t help but stare at the way the wind slightly ruffles her white hair as it’s fanned out against the grass. Eventually, Alina says, “I don’t know. It’s weird?”

“Weird?” Zoya pulls herself up onto her elbow, brow furrowed. “Is he being weird? Is it a man thing?”

Alina shakes her head. “No, no, not at all. I don’t know. We tried the romance thing, and it was nice, but it was weird. Like I love him, and I know that, and he knows that, but it just didn’t feel right. I think… Hear me out, but I think it was like what it would feel like to kiss my brother, you know?”

Zoya wrinkles her nose. “Ew.”

“You don’t need to tell me that!”

Zoya opens her mouth to respond, but she feels something small and damp hit her cheek get into her mouth. She spits into her hand what tastes like... grass? “Hey!” She rips up a handful and throws it at Alina, who throws more at her in turn. Alina rolls away, but Zoya summons a small gust of wind to target a burst of grass to Alina’s neck. They carry on, throwing and running around the clearing until Alina slips in a small patch of mud, landing sprawled out on her back.

By the time they’re done, they’re laughing hard enough that their ribs hurt, and Alina’s white hair is flecked with green. “I think I needed that,” Zoya confesses, and she certainly feels lighter than she has since the war began.

“I think I did too,” Alina says, and the smile lingers on her face. “I’m trying to relax, but I don’t know what to do all of the time? My time has never just been my own.”

“Some of us have real problems, and you’re complaining that you’re  bored  after  saving the world ?” Zoya says with a grin, and that gets another chuckle from Alina. “You’re always welcome to help me wrangle the royal nuisance.”

“And spend time with you?  Never ,” she responds, then reaches to brush a strand of grass out of Zoya’s hair. Her hand hesitates, just briefly, inches from Zoya’s ear, but she continues the motion. “No, but I think I want this. I miss you though.”

“I miss you too,” Zoya says, “And I…”  Say it, Nazyalensky,  she thinks,  You’ve never had a hard time voicing your thoughts before . But this is different. It’s not a random Second Army boy or girl that she found attractive and, because she was Zoya Nazyalensky, they’d kiss her back because she was the best and brightest. It’s Alina, Sun Summoner, someone she was horrible to but who eventually forgave her, one of her closest friends. And she’s been staring at her lips all night, and suddenly she’s a little bit too tipsy on laughter and champagne, and her heart feels like it’s about to burst from her chest. “And I kind of want to kiss you?”

Alina’s eyes flutter, and she fingers the seam of her skirt. For a moment Zoya thinks she’s steeling herself to say no, or to run, but then she turns her head to the side and captures her lips.

Kissing Alina feels like summoning a massive storm, the energy from the lightning running straight through her. Her lips are dry and her breath smells of old champagne, but Zoya is electrified. It’s never felt like this before, not when she’d kissed Genya once while very drunk, not when she’d kissed Mal, not when the Darkling had said he was proud of her and kissed her. She’s never felt so excited and yet at ease. As if she’s  home , a concept she hasn’t considered for years, laying on her back in a clearing and kissing a saint. When she pulls away, Alina’s eyes are half-closed and that small smile remains on her lips.

“We should go back before Mal thinks a hunter mistook us for deer,” she says, hefting herself off of the ground with some difficulty, brushing the worst of the mud off of her skirt. When she gets to her feet, she turns to Zoya, offers a hand, and says, “And we should do that again sometime.”

Zoya stands, kisses her forehead, and they walk together hand-in-hand under the moonlight.

( @wafflesandkruge ; @grishatober )

[hobiheavenly]

AFTER THE SUNRISE

☼ Pairing: Jung Hoseok x Reader

☼ Summary: you decided to play a prank on Hoseok since he called you undesirable, but were his claims actually true or is there something else hiding under the dancing man’s fascade?

☼ Word count: 4.6K

☼ Warning: fingering, cunnilingus (male receiving), slight dirty talk, penetration, cream pie, Hoseok’s huge dick and dancing hips

☼ A/N: ITS FINALLY HERE! I’m sorry to have kept all you waiting but finally I got this out of me. i swear I had the most horrible writers block but I hope this turns out for the better! Please let me know what you think! And as always I haven’t edited anything lol what else is new?

The sun was shining in Hoseok’s face. Normally he was usually a morning person but never after a party. He stretched out of the covers but then suddenly felt he wasn’t alone. He reared his head and his face lost all color. Oh no… he had really done it this time. I mean out of all the silly things he could have done, he truly fucked up this time. There you were lying in his bed. Looking under the blankets he confirmed his biggest fear….he was naked. And judging by the looks of the environment, a trail of clothes from the door to the bed, you both had sex. Hoseok went full panic mode as you slept peacefully naked underneath the covers. What even happened last night?

“Think Hoseok, think!!” he thought to himself. What DID he even do last night? All he remembered was going to Seokjin’s party and getting wasted after the dance battle he had with you and dancing with many girls, but in no moment had he gotten close to you….did he?

He remembered seeing you in that cute black ensemble and dancing with that pretty boy who had his hands all over you. That only made him just want to grab you and mess you up till you forgot all about that other guy. Sure he didn’t well like you but he couldn’t deny himself being attracted to you. But even if that were the case….at what point did he even get together with you?

You rolled over to put a hand on his chest, starting to hug him and pull closer to him. As you sighed in bliss, Hoseok looked at you as if you were an alien of another planet. SINCE WHEN DO YOU HUG HIM? WHY ARE YOU NAKED? There were a million questions in his mind he was bound to short circuit. In his jumbled mess of thoughts he knew one thing was certain. It would have seemed that you both had made love all night long. But it also seemed Jung Hoseok didn't have any memory of the incident whatsoever.

Now he had to face the consequences.

Slowly you opened your eyes and smiled as you kissed his cheek.

“Good morning” you said, smile so soft and warm. it was such a contrast to your regular serious face you greeted him with the exception of the occasional small smile popping in his direction.

“Uh, good morning Y/N”

“Y/N? why so formal? What happened with calling me “babygirl”? I mean that’s what you’ve been calling me all night” you stretched a little like a kitten waking up from a nap, a little bit of the sheet slipping down revealing your cleavage.

Whoa, were your tits always this good looking?

“Y/N… I mean Baby, what happened last night?”

“You mean you don't remember? I mean after doing it four times I thought for sure you wouldn't forget”, you give a flirty wink.

Hoseok was in total shock. FOUR TIMES! He knew he was a good lover, but for heaven's sake that was too much on a drunken night.

“All I remember is going to a party with Seokjin and drinking a couple of drinks, and then everything goes blank.”

You smiled and blushed. It was as if you both shared a secret but unfortunately he wasn’t able to recall at all “Oh that was some party last night. Especially the one you and I had here. I mean for a man who claims he doesn’t desire me you couldn’t keep your hands off of me” you looked down and traced circles in his chest while the hue of your cheeks went a little more red “Even when it's my first time without a condom it still was incredible!”

HOLY SHIT! He had fucked you without a wrapper. If he was feeling bad before for doing this the fact that you had entrusted him to fuck you without a condom made him feel even crappier. Jung Hoseok was many things in this life but he was a gentleman first and foremost and he would never fuck without a condom, especially on the first go. But how do you tell a girl who is over the moon about your sexual prowess that you remembered nothing?

“Y/N, I'm sorry but last night was a mistake.”

Bad start. He knew better than to start with the M word just as you were happy about this. You started forming the cutest pout with a splash of sadness coming from your eyes. It would be a lie to say he didn’t crave to kiss your lips and take away that sad expression. But no, this is time to focus.

“What do you mean a mistake? You were the one who actually begged me to do it. I was saying no, but you kept insisting.”

Hoseok sat up and took his hair off his face. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. This must be wrong, he would never beg a girl to have sex with him. "Ok calm down Hoseok I'm sure you must be dreaming. Y/N isn't here and you are just dreaming. Yeah, you are just having an erotic dream about Y/N"

He rubbed his eyes and even pinched himself, but it was useless, you were still there. Then panic struck him like a hammer. What if he got you pregnant? Damn, he was a goner if Krystal knew what he had done since she hated his guts more than anyone.

“Are you ok, Hobi? You don't look so good”

HOBI? A cute ass nickname? Really? Just how far did all this go?

“I….don't remember anything last night” He said nervously “I am so sorry”

A pained expression covered your face as you clutch to the bed sheets, “But you said you loved me. that you would treat me right. Are you saying you lied to me?”

“Technically it’s not a lie since I don’t remember” he tried to joke it off but that only made things worse because your face was just even more sad. Hoseok grabbed your shoulders, “Again, I’m so sorry, Y/N. I normally dont sleep around so easily. I’m always more focused on my dancing that I never think of girls.

“But what about those other girls you dated? Momo and the other girl?” you asked surprised.

Hoseok sighed and sat up straight. this had been thrown in his face so many times before it was necessary to set the record straight, “Ok so let me clear that once and for all, Momo is my dance partner and nothing else. She and I never dated and it was all a dumb rumor that grew way out of proportion. Besides she’s in a happy relationship with Jeongyeon, the other girl in the picture”

You blink for a second, disbelieving the statement the naked man in front of you had just said. It couldn’t be wrong. All the indications said otherwise, there was no way this could be true.

“But I saw the pictures...And the kiss emoji...you two were so close. And then the tons of girls that you go after.”

“Nope, Momo is completely utterly in lesbians with her girlfriend. Funny you mention that because Jeongyeon believed that same rumor and for the longest time hated my guts thinking I was going to snatch her girlfriend. But that time we went to dinner all together we bonded and she doesn’t hate me as much” He chuckled lightly reminiscing the many colorful threats and hard, cold stares Jeongyeon would throw at him from time to time, “and the other girls are just fans of my dancing and nothing more. I draw a fine line between my fans and myself and I have a rule of never dating a fan. Too troublesome.”

Unbelievable! You think you know a guy and it turns out he’s actually good?? Unreal!

“So you’re not a player?” You ask still blinking in confusion.

“Of course not. I barely go out with friends. Sure girls ask me out and stuff but I mostly just dance, go home, eat, and play videogames. My sex life is pretty dry to be honest. Which is why I’m very surprised I even slept with you”

This was the first of you hearing this. After all this time, you just thought he was always going out and sleeping with different girls, which made hating him easier for you. This entire scene was based on the misconception of this, but it turns out he was just a simple guy who could only think of dancing and if his body was any indication, he truly did it a lot. His abs glimmering in the morning light. You were starting to regret doing this.

You shifted in bed trying to get up scurrying yourself away from him. You needed out of this whole convoluted situation. “Listen Hoseok, I think it’s best if we just put this all behind us. Like you said it’s a mistake and we can just never speak of this again”

“But, you said we fucked without a condom?” Hoseok asked.

“Yeah, fucked me raw all night. But what does that matter now?”

He saw the precipitation in your eyes. There’s something here more than meets the eye and he wanted you to spill the beans. There was only one way he could get a woman to tell him what he wanted and you were right there ready to do what he pleases.

“I have to take responsibility over this Babe.” the brunet haired Adonis said as his face grew a sneaky smile. “I will have to get you to go out with me and form a relationship….probably even marry you if it turns out you get pregnant”

“Well, you don't have to do that. I mean, this was just something that...happened” You said nervously as Hoseok got closer to you. Each inch making you difficult to breathe, “I can just take the day after pill or something…”

“Oh, but I want to. And I wouldn't mind making you my wife” he said with a very sexy smile. He’s got you cornered just like he wanted you.

“Really?” you said surprised “cause I don't mind that we did it without a condom. I mean we wouldn’t be the first couple to do so... I..I…”

You were interrupted abruptly by a very passionate kiss that Hoseok layed on your lips. It was incredible how easily you felt weak and trembled in his arms as he possessed your lips. You felt the room spin in circles as both of you submerged into kissing each other.

It would be a lie say that you had never imagined yourself kissing Hoseok. Deep down, as much as you grew yourself to hate him you couldn’t really do so. The attractive style, his grace as he walked, the way he seemed to own everything but was never smug about it always pulled you in to him like a magnet. You didn’t hate Hoseok so much as you hated yourself for being attracted to him.

He pulled you close as he deepened the contact you both made instinctively your hands went to his chest and neck. You brain screamed to stop, your heart yelled go, and your body seemed on fire all from just one kiss.

When you both pulled away you were both breathless, lips numb and eyes dark from the passion that formulated within both of you. You had to slap yourself mentally to regain consciousness of reality. This can’t be true! Hoseok would never have feelings for you...right?

“I’m confused, I thought you said...that you didn’t like me” you closed your eyes. The room seemed to spin in its own axis threatening to make you dizzy.

“We said a lot of things online but most of them were fueled by anger I felt. If I’m being honest I didn’t hate our first date. Yes, I will admit I didn’t help make a good impression coming in all sweaty and in my dancing clothes. But overall I had fun and I thought you were cute, peculiar, but cute nonetheless.”

“That’s why the tweets hurt so much for me. I thought we had something but then you went off to complain and then proceeded to date another guy, of course I’d be mad”

Oh my god, your day out with Jungkook! That wasn’t really even a date for you. You felt bad about this whole situation, it was necessary to apologize and tell him the truth of what went on but Hoseok continued talking.

“I was angry at you and then at him but then I became more angry at myself. I was the one who blew it so it’s only natural. I just wanted one more chance to try to mend things but you and I would get into arguments and I must admit I love confrontation with you, it really turns me on”

Your mouth went agape with Hoseok’s confession. This was totally unexpected. You just wanted to prove the point that you were desirable to him but this goes beyond what you expected to get out of him. He took advantage of this moment to continue kissing you his hands spread on your back as he continues to press against you.

Hoseok’s lips spread on your skin beginning with your neck and going down to your breasts. You parted your lips the moment his tongue started getting closer to your bosom but instead of a plea to stop what escaped your lips was a soft moan. Oh how you cursed your body for betraying you.

Hoseok’s eyes looked at you, darkened by the lust he felt as he continued licking and using his teeth on your now hardened nipple. “I’ve wanted to touch you and taste you for the longest time. And from here on out you are going to be mine, no more pretty boy for you”

The sexual haze was drowning you to the point of forgetting everything that was going on around you. You needed a moment to think. you needed….

“Hold it right there!”

Hoseok turned to the door and saw Kim Seokjin and Jung Krystal, your personal friends, standing there looking at the couple. Your lover grew angry. “Seokjin this better be good! What do you want?” he said irritated.

“I can't let you take away Y/N’s innocence.”

“What are you going on about Hyung? Innocence? This a private matter between me and Y/N”

Right behind Seokjin, Krystal came out and pushed the rich heir out of the way making her presence be center stage, like the queen she usually was. “Actually no. You and Y/N have never made love to each other” Krystal interjected.

“But last night….”

“You passed out after a couple of drinks. I told you drinking scotch was a bit too hard for you” said Seokjin shrugging his broad shoulders and shaking his head.

The confusion on Hoseok’s face became the most evident. It would explain his lack of memory of any event occurred last night. But was this all really just a ruse? Had all the emotions you displayed right now been a lie?

“And the three of us had a perfect way to prank you” she replied with delight, “well better yet, Seokjin and I made a bet to Y/N that she could pretend to have made love to you. Fortunately for us, she was already buzzed and was looking for a thrill”

You could see Hoseok’s expression changed in that moment. Gone was the smile and the playful smirk and was now being replaced by a stern face. You instantly felt the pang of regret in your chest. If only you had known before about his feelings. Why had you been so blind?!

“I got to say, she is a good actress” said the older hyung, rubbing more salt to the wound.

So it was a prank? He hadn't made love to you? He felt a bit relieved but the other part of him felt angry. Hoseok had revealed his emotions to you so easily. He felt like a fool for trusting you so quickly seeing as how you had previously expressed anger and disgust. That couldn’t have been taken away a in one night and he should have known that.

“How could you do this?” Hoseok said with a somber and serious voice.

“Well at first i did it because Seokjin was going to pay me. When I thought this more I convinced myself that this was payback for all the snarky remarks you did about me being undesirable and i thought what better way to get back at you than to scare you” as you relayed this you could see his face harden with each word until you finished with,

“But then I realized that in reality this was a really great way to get closer to you.”

Hoseok blinked in confusion, “If you wanted to get closer to me then why did you have to make up all this?”

“You think you would have taken time to even get to know me, or even listen to me for more than three seconds without you fighting with me? I wanted to be with you as something more than just the silly girl who you always make fun of.”

Hoseok looked at you tenderly. Even through the competitive nature you both had and the disdain you had always shown him you were a sweet girl. An impulsive one, but sweet nonetheless. He looked at Seokjin and gave him an evil glare.

“Get out now!”

The elder shook nervously behind his tall girlfriend, “Look Hobi-ah we are sorry but please take it easy. We were only having fun.”

“Get. Out. Now!”

Hoseok pulled Seokjin and Krystal out of his bedroom and out of his apartment.

“Wait, what about Y/N? Don't tell me that you are going to punish her?” said Krystal.

“As a matter a fact, I am. My soon to be girlfriend has a thing or two she needs to learn about the consequences of trouble making” Hoseok slamming the door in their faces and directly went back to look at you lying in his bed. His eyes redshot in rage and a stern line on his lips. He walked slowly, like a lion hunting his prey.

“I….I’m sorry” you held the sheets in a tight grip, nervous as Hoseok walked up to you, “I can make this up to you somehow, I didn’t know you liked me and I…”

The moment Hoseok shook right next to your bed, he swiftly pulled you close to him and possessed your lips in one stealthy move. His lips were demanding, pressing you so close to him it gave you no space to breathe or think.

“You wanna make it up to me? How about making that fake scene come true? How about I take your body and mark it mine again and again till you have nothing in your mind other than me?”

His words sent chills up your spine and started a fire in your core. You looked at his eyes, studied his expression as you touched his cheek, then gracing his neck and his chest. Normally your instinct would yell to run and leave, but your body felt numb to instinct craving the attention and the touch of Hoseok’s hands all over you.

“Then make me yours, hot shot. You should know well by now that I never back down from a challenge”

With just a growl as a response, Hoseok pulled away the bed sheets and pushed you down on the bed. He observed your body spread on his bed, waiting for him to fuck you hard and make good on that threat he made. He was determined to enjoy that delicious body of yours slowly till he drove you mad.

Hoseok lowers himself kissing you passionately as his fingers explore your skin, the touch sparking fire on your body, every inch he touched burning. He looked at your nipples for a second as he pinched softly on one of them, the sensation sure to ignite more heat.

But that was just one bump in the road, there’s was much more to explore and have fun with. The moment his fingers reached your core he swiftly entered his digit inside the hot entrance, your pussy already hot and wet from his previous foreplay.

“All hot and wet for me babygirl? You’re feeling rather tight though” with just one finger he started to pump inside “do you think your pussy can take me?”

The challenge, he knew how to get you fired up. You responded to his touch with a soft moan as you grabbed yourself to his shoulders and arched your back. You took advantage of the distraction he had with your breast as he dipped his head to succor your tit to grab a hold of his erect penis, pumping him slowly. The unexpected movement causing him to react to your touch. If he wanted a challenge he’s gonna get one.

“You let me worry about my pussy… unless you think this big fat cock’s not enough?”

Fuck taking this slow, he wanted you right then and there. But just like with dancing he wanted to take this sensual tango for two and make it as long as necessary. He pumped, you pumped, he put another finger inside you while his thumb traced circles to your clit while you tightened the grip on his dick tracing circles on the hot red head. It was all a give and take as you both kept kissing each other almost devouring each other with each kiss.

“Hoseok….i feel like I’m gonna cum soon” you felt the flashes of pleasure come in like a tidal wave and wipe you out in the most delicious way.

You didn’t need to be a psychic to know he had his smug smile come through his face as you descended from your high. Round one went to Hoseok, but the battle wasn’t over yet. “Aww...cumming so soon? And my dick hasn’t even gone inside you yet” he faked a pout.

Your breath hitched for a bit as you closed your eyes on him. Swiftly you push Hoseok on the bed and slithered your way down to his dick, waiting erect and hot for your touch. “Then I guess I better step up my game”

His dick twitched with excitement which brought a smirk to your lips. Your lips sucked the head, the taste salty from his precum. One thing was true, his cock was way too big for you to take. At least with your mouth for sure. You had to use both of your hands to pump while your mouth sucked him in and out at an increasingly slow tempo. Hoseok had slept with many girls in his lifetime but seeing you between his legs bobbing your head and struggling to be able to take his full length inside your mouth was both adorable and erotic. That mouth that once spat vicious things to him was now sucking him off as if life depended on it. He could see you touching your clit trying to get some fun out of this yourself but you opted to just stick to pleasuring him. Your high would come soon after.

But your technique was too good on him in the long run, his orgasm threatening to come any second. You let go of Hoseok’s cock in one pop and it took him all of his inner strength to not come in your face as he saw you; hair messy, lips red from the friction and your eyes darkened in lust.

“Are you not gonna cum for me?” Your catty smile grew wickedly on your face. Seems like you’re both at a tie.

“I’d rather cum inside you” he shifted his weight on his forearms as you lifted yourself back up and kissed him once more. His taste lingered in your mouth triggering a beastly growl from Hoseok as he grabbed your legs to put you in the correct position, grabbing his dick to probe around your hot entrance that was already twitching to be fucked.

The moment his dick entered your core, time seemed to stop. There was no twitter war, no other people, no feuds of any sort. It was just Hoseok and you in a strangely perfect link of body and soul.

For Hoseok, pussy was madness; pleasure feeling so heavenly, the heat feeling like something made from hell. He felt bliss and sin all in one sweet movement of his dick.

You closed your eyes feeling his entire length slowly enter you, the head of his dick gracing the cervix making you see stars so quickly. But Hoseok snapped you back to reality, by literally slapping your ass, eyes fixed on you.

“Look at me while I fuck you, look at me and only me”

“You truly do love an audience when you dance” you said breath shaking with the warning of an impending second orgasm.

“This is my best dance yet, babygirl” he winked, moving his hips slowly and little by little increasing his tempo. Hoseok’s dancing abilities truly shined the moments he fucked you. His hips knew the right force to which to drive you crazy. Soft, soft, hard. Your hips swayed along not wanting to fall back

Your legs locked behind his back as you bounced on his dick. Every second his dick was out, your pussy pulled him right back in. You craved it you needed it like a drug and Hoseok didn’t fall behind. It was crazy just how right you both felt. The crook of his hips gave perfect access for your legs, your beautiful tits bouncing on top of his in the most synchronized way.

“I can’t…I’m gonna cum again...fuck you’re so big inside me”

“Same...your pussy is so good it’s devouring me whole...I can’t wait anymore”

Even while on the verge of an impending orgasm, Hoseok’s mind was knocked into reality. He didn’t have a condom on and cumming inside you would be inconsiderate. And as if you could read his concerns you put your lips close to his ear and whispered: “it’s okay I can take the pill, do good on that promise and mark me as yours Hobi”

“Ffffuuuuckkk!!!” He bellowed as he came on top of you, his hot cum splattering on your insides. Hoseok tumbled down next to you, both of you out of breath and completely dazed after the most amazing orgasm both of you had ever felt.

“This... is way better than a twitter war” you spouted happily as you kissed your brand new boyfriend in his lips.

“Had I known sex would be this great we could have avoided so much shit had we just fucked the first date” Hoseok smirked toyingly.

“Good sir, but I am still a lady!” You feigned indignation, “I never sleep on the first date!”

“Well then, good thing the first one was already over. How about I take you to many more to make up for the one I screwed up?”

“Challenge accepted” you laughed as you continued to lazily kiss each other.

For the rest of the day the two of you decided to just stay in his room where you dedicated the entire day talking about how you felt, about every single misconception between the both of you and of course there was the "obedience lessons".

[totoroses]

i found this lesbian survey and decided to fill it out!

Femme or butch? is this what do i prefer or which i am? im a femme and i have no preference in dating, i’ve been wildly attracted to both and any in between

Do you have a “type”? If so, describe it. the only nearly completely common denominator though my exes are having brown eyes? i have dated only one person who did not have brown eyes. i always feel safer looking into brown eyes then blue. i woudl say i have often gone after the romantic artsy type with good music taste and some kind of signature style about them, ironically none of which drew me to my current girlfriend who i believe is probably defintiely the love of my life

Plaid button-ups or leather jackets? leather jackets! i will swoon over smartly dressed gals in button downs as well as a chill gal in some plaid unbuttoned flannel but the two together make me think of a lumberjack

Describe your style. i usually go for one of two styles- softly dressed forest wanderer, or slightly sassy soft grunge. both include my doc martens, but one is more natural colours and old fashioned dresses and the other is sassy tshirts and 90sish thrift store finds like denim and dark florals

Describe your aesthetic.pressed flowers between the pages of a book on forest spirits, rose milk tea, silver rainy downpours, curly baby hairs, white peaches, a cat sleeping in a library, custard pastries, a circle of mushrooms in moss, opals and furry moths

Favorite article of clothing? my one forever 21 dress ive had since like junior year that i can wear without a bra and it has like a cool cross back i just looooveee ittt, then also my embroidered minty 1930s style qipao sort of dress

Favorite pair of shoes? my doc martens and green chinese embroidered lace up slippers

Current haircut? currently blonde (ugh) and currently my hair falls just past my breasts, the goal is to grow it to my bellybutton!

Any haircut goals for the future? i really wanna get on the thick fluffy bangs bandwagon but i dont think i have the stamina to put up with growing them out again smh

Describe the best date you’ve been on. there was this one date i went on with one of my high school girlfriends where we went to a bookstore and hung out and then stuck googly eyes all over my city on random monuments and street signs, and we also ate thai food and listened to music and it was still one of the most lovely dates. BUT my girlfriend recently visited me in taiwan and we went in a glass bottom gondola ride up a mountain and drank from coconuts and wandered through old streets and had the most amazing tea food with a spectacular view and it was heaven

Describe the worst date you’ve been on. probably the one where i went on a picnic with my first girlfriend who then broke up with me that same day and even though our entire relationship was so awkward and not what is should have been it still hurt so bad

Single? Taken? taken!

If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife! where do i begin! my girlfriend is a slightly shorter than me girl named lynn who loved korean variety shows, drinking coca cola, listening to cheesy love songs, and playing tricks on people (especially me). she used to be a major tomboy in middle and high school and date all the girls and get slapped a lot, as well as mess with teachers and play pranks on them and steal things from their lunchboxes. more than half of her birthchart including sun, rising, and venus are scorpio, and she wants to start her own streetstyle online brand but has not yet found a catchy brand name!

If single, what are you looking for in a potential girlfriend/wife? :)

Describe your dream wedding my girlfriend says if we get married we need two, a traditional chinese wedding (she is from china) and a western one with a priest since i am catholic, and i couldnt agree more. my dream wedding includes just very close friends and family, extravagant lights and flowers and a reception party playlist chosen by me, catered by the teahouse we went to in taiwan. i know its so silly and superficial but i want the dreamiest dress that i design, wisteria everywhere, and most of all i just want lynn at the end of the alter looking stunning in whatever it is she decides to wear

Do you want kids? YES me and lynn talk about this a lot because we both love kids and both agree on at least 4, no more than 8. and we will share who carries the kids so not just one of us is having our uteruses worn out

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? guilin, china. but its a fantasy. guilin is real and beautiful but chinese laws make it so that even if we settle down there and build a house it cant truly belong to us, and in china you cant have a private business and it jsut sucks because the drema is to live in the quiet countryside with a simple life and beautiful scenery to explore together and with our children

Favorite lesbian movie? i love so many but im gonna go with the handmaiden!

Favorite lesbian novel/story? i havent read nearly enough, but  adore all things by malinda lo and julie anne peters! ash by malinda lo is probably my favourite. i have to still read sarah waters though, i hear she reigns supreme

Favorite lesbian song? don’t pull away by milosh ft jviews (the music video is gay at least, i also love hayley kiyoko)

Favorite lesbian musician? hayley kiyoko probably

What lesbian stereotypes do you fit into, if any? mmmm i dont like softball so that doesnt work...i read a lot of sappho though! and i have short nails? and love buffy? are these stereotypes?

Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal? ugh yes

If a woman wanted to woo you, what would a surefire way to accomplish that? write me a love letter or make me a mixtape about your feleings something cheesy

Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian? girls!!!!

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person? cat but i also love pups!

Turn ons? a musical wonderful voice i could listen to and listen to, easy and stimulating conversations, passion for something that lights up their eyes

Turn offs? rudeness in any shape or form, indecisiveness or feigning indecisiveness because you think i want to make the decisions, despicable movie and music taste, smell

Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you? mmmm in the past it has been pretty even. i have learned though that with women it really is a waiting game more than with guys so with my current girlfriend the tension was killing me so much i had to straight up ask her if something was going on and when she said yes she did like me too i was so relieved because she admitted to having not dated anyone since high school (5 years ago for her) and not asking anyone out while at college so if i had kept waiting for her who knows if we would have gotten together!

What is your dream career? i want to be a stay at home mom and author and perhaps an art teacher or preschool teacher on the side if the books dont pa the bills!

Talk about your interests or hobbies! writing and reading and drawing and singing and hiking and listening to music and watching korean dramas and making lists and studying languages

What is the most attractive quality a woman can have? passion, not necessarily in the sexual wya, but passion for something in general. like if she is an actress you see her on the stage and see how into it she is, and offstage she talks about it in a way that shows she is capable of truly loving something so much and seeing wonder in life. or a girl who seems quiet but then when she starts to show you the music she likes she closes her eyes and knows every lyric and has this expression of true passion and love for the music, i am captivated by women who are captivated by the purest elements of life from music to dance to nature

Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone? for women, i fall in infatuation quite easily. i was always more cautious with men of course and now i avoid them altogether. but love is something i’ve been becoming more conservative of somehow. i think because i was so hurt by someone before and gave and gave without receiving and im scared of that happening again. i have to be receiving love to give it, thats something i finally can control my impulses over and protect myself from.

Ever fallen for your best-friend? HA

Ever fallen for a straight girl? HAHA

The L-Word: yes or no? (love it or hate it?) heck to the no i couldnt make it past two episodes 

Favorite comfort food? macaroni and cheese

Coffee or tea? tea

Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above? none but i have tried vegetarian before

Do you have any pets? a chinchilla and a cat!

Early-riser or night-owl? night owl 

What is your sign? gemini sun, sag moon, sag rising

What is your Myers-Briggs type? INFP

Who was your first lesbian crush? my first serious lesbian crush was on a girl at my middle school who dressed to the nines every day in vintage dresses and sweaters and she flirted with practically everyone just joking around and always had a boyfriend but was just charming in every way. my whoel day would eb ruined if i couldn’t just see her or say hello once, and i thought i was just obsessed until i was like ‘wait what if she kissed me’ and BAM i knew it was a real life crush

At what age did you know you were a lesbian? im not really sure. i identified as bi/pan from freshman year to junior year i think, but then was realizing i definitely had a preference and didn’t want to be with guys in a relationship at all to be honest but even up until last summer i was really questioning if i was asexual, so its been a journey but i think i finally fully realized i am a happy happy lesbian after meeting lynn

At what age did you come out (if you have)? i was 14 when i first told my parents i was bi, 18 when i said im a lesbian 

Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)? just my girly friend

Talk about how your day went i worked this morning 7-11 after only sleeping 4 hours since i got hooked on ‘tipping the velvet’ the bbc miniseries, said goodbye to a friend, had school and did a presentation on how to make rosemilk bubble tea, i ate at a moomin cafe with my coworker, and now am working on homework and doing this survey and putting off my night cleaning duties eheh

Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the future  i just want to have a family and to have my books published, thats all i really need. a loving wife, my sister still by my side as my partner in crime, so many children, so many stories finally told that people are reading. i really want to build a lovely house for my family like my grandparents did once upon a time, with secret rooms and unique hiding places, a house they can pass down as they grow up and it can have our lineage. i want to live by the mountains and trees and water, i want to be able to speak mandarin, cantonese, korean, japanese, icelandic, italian, arabic, and polish fluently

[twistednuns]

January 2017

All this sunshine lately. Reading in the beam of warm sunshine on my bed. Taking pretty pictures of translucent things like physalis leaves or a crystal. Admiring how green my eyes are in the right light.

Berlin magic.

Despite all the pain and soreness after being ill: the fact that I do have stomach muscles. Good to know.

A radio interview with the astronaut Samantha Cristoforetti: "From the very beginning, I liked sleeping in weightlessness. Just closing your eyes, floating, sleeping." What a nice thought.

New Year's Day was unexpectedly peaceful and happy. After celebrating with Claudia, Frank and Fabi (we made salad with goat cheese and bacon, pho and raspberry tiramisu; watched Dinner for One, played a drinking game and Activity and Bleigießen - apparently I got a ship which means I'm gonna go on a big trip) I stayed at Frank's place. We discussed space and the different planetory size relations and how insignificant I think we are so I don't like thinking about space. Frank is more optimistic; he thinks the idea that humanity might really matter on an intergalactic level in a few thousand years is so exciting. All this must have been triggered by watching Lars von Trier's Melancholia together. Anyway. In bed, we talked about our ideal picnic spot (somewhere over the rainbow) again, Machu Picchu with Roquefort. And illegal international cheese smuggling. I told him the story of Obi's Swiss colleagues who always bring cheese when they come to work at the observatory in Chile. On the next morning, I found Frank playing with his birthday present on the floor. I made tea and we watched another episode of Westworld. I left the house because his parents were about to come over and treat him to dinner. Got a beautiful brownie and some mezze at the Turkish bakery (I love the fact that they're open on Sundays) and took in the atmosphere. Everything was calm, the sun was shining, it was a bit foggy. So I went to Ruhmeshalle to see the Bavaria statue. There was confetti on the floor and Theresienwiese actually felt like Tempelhofer Feld in Berlin. Weird and beautiful. Apparently I'm not the only one who notices things like that. When I got home I talked to Doris for a while and suggested a spontaneous roadtrip to Frank. Oh, and on my way home I had this glorious but rare feeling, that I am unbelievably blessed. Everything is really really good and all I gotta do is stop wanting more and appreciating what I have. It's strange, the more intelligent and spoilt you are the likelier you are to be unhappy. Not anymore. I'll try to be good to myself. I'm thankful, SO thankful for what I have and how I feel at the moment, even though I don't really know what changed. I used to be SO miserable.

Ashley was happy and excited like a little child because of the large amount of New Year's Eve fireworks in Germany.

My mum sent me a book and a very heartfelt letter this weekend. I loved the textile feeling of the paper she used and read the book right away.

Doris's reaction to the fact that I glued glitter to my face and got some stuck in my eye.

At New Year's Eve, my fortune cookie advised: "It is not enough just to know the way. You also have to get there." Smart cookie.

Visiting Dantebad for the first time, a large outdoor swimming pool. It was freezing cold and started to snow, but I swam some laps nevertheless. There were cute ladies with floral bathing caps, too. And I loved the underwater lights and the steam in the night. Nice view. When I walked to my car, the sidewalk was covered in snow. Quiet and peaceful.

Getting a small piece of Roquefort and graffiti tofu. Eating it slowly at my desk. Always cutting off just a tiny peace and eating it straight from the knife.

The colour of the broccoli against the pale pink plate. Always take note of good colour combinations (like neon pink Sharpie on light blue paper and pistachio green fingernails against the plum coloured sheets).

Pasta with broccoli, a little cream, parmigiano, chili, thyme. Maybe an onion. Heavenly good.

The British property market delivers gems I'd immediately move into. Or rather this one? I don't even want to look at the rest because I'll never be able to afford something like that (nor do I want to, for that matter, but I appreciate great architecture). Related: somehow I ended up on the official website of the Bavarian castle department and found out that you can actually rent a lot of the rooms! If you could only rent the greenhouses in the botanical garden, too... I'd love to get married there one day.

It didn't make me happy but it moved me: a woman wakes up to find the partner next to her dead. 28 years old. She falls apart, obviously. And she writes about it.

Dr.Hauschka's Rose Day Cream. What a blessing for my moisture-depraved winter skin.

Walking through the Nymphenburg castle park and the botanical gardens in the sunshine. The lakes were frozen and everything was covered in snow. Lena and I went to the beautiful café, sitting at a table in front of the window with a view over the historical botanical institute. I got hot chocolate because I love spooning off the molten whipped cream before I drink it. Unfortunately it was already too late for the greenhouses but we are planning on coming back soon to see the tropical butterflies.

Buying an &otherstories nail polish on  sale that has the same colour as my favourite pistachio ice-cream from Ballabeni in Schwabing (the PERFECT ice-cream flavour).

Getting the last table at grano, a tiny Italian pizza place behind the Munich city museum with interesting wall art.

Feeling like a naughty librarian in my Ace&Tate glasses.

It's odd how comforting a simple "there's absolutely nothing in the fridge" dish is. Couscous with tomato puree. Parmigiano, if I have some. A dash of lemon. That's it.

The movie Gnade (2012) with Birgit Minichmayr and Jürgen Vogel. And beautiful Norwegian landscapes.

The little blue suede pouch with rose gold speckles I got for Christmas. I use it as a wallet and whenever I take it out of my bag I notice how much I love the look and feel of it. Very rarely, an object just feels like you, doesn't it?

Cutting open a passion fruit. And the purple carrot dying the boiling water blue.

The ARTE create Let's Swing series.

A weird dream. Leaving Frank's house, taking the bus to a physiotherapist's practice on a busy street. Waiting room, far too many people. After one or two hours we discovered the auditorium next door. At first, there were only pupils from my old schools (and at some point the dream had been one about a school lesson, I suppose). Soon after, people from the waiting room dropped in and I decided to put on a show. I was the host, of course, and stood on stage, speaking into a microphone. I don't even wanna know what I said. But then Inge and Wölki walked up to me and started making out. And *zoom* we're in a French coastal town (?), climbing over ruins in the sea? I don't know how my subconsciousness conjures these things up...

Going to Candy Club party with Doris. I didn't wear a check shirt like all the lesbians but instead bright pink hair. There was a drag show with a dancing pizza, an all-girl band (The Veras) and an interesting hipster duo, Nalan381. I loved some of the DJ's choices, too, like Warpaint, Róisín Murphy, Bonaparte and Electric Six.

#SaltBae

The big snowman my neighbours have built in the garden. Watching the birds peck at the bags of peanuts I hung up in the bushes.

Eating quail eggs for the first time (we got them at the Karstadt supermarket where everything is super pricey but it's so exciting to go through the aisles and look at the unusual items they're selling). The box said they came from "alternative production" so Frank and I were joking about quails with tiny party hats, riding model trains around the pen. Only drinking full moon water and having energy crystals around.

The fact that I really enjoy healthy eating. I usually forget when I eat too much junk food and sweets because the palate is so easily adaptable. But recently I've started preparing salads, soups, chia pudding and lots of fruit and veg again - it's fun and it makes me feel so much better.

Travel Man - 48 Hours in... // A travel guide series with Richard Ayoade!

ProperCorn - tiny popcorn snackpacks; mine came with smooth peanut and almond. Yum.

Also: eating much healthier. Eating less. Eating a ton of veggies and fruit. And feeling so good about it! I even lost a few kilograms already. Is this finally happening?

Going to Residenztheater for the first time to see Arthur Miller's The Crucible. What a great play. Later I found out that the actor who playes John Proctor was also in Toni Erdmann; he played the colleague who attended the naked party after all, I think. I've got two more theatre tickets for the next weeks, I'm really looking forward to it.

Having dinner and watching a movie at the cinema with colleagues and Nicole's brother and father. We got along famously and I actually got her Bernhard's phone number because we are planning on seeing an ice-hockey match together.

Discovering this old back issue of Missy Magazine with a focus on Sleater-Kinney. Why, WHY is it sold out?! Also this photograph. Dressing like Corin is my life goal now. I'm having a fangirl moment.

Reading about feminism. Being overwhelmed by the Women's Marches all over the world on the day after Trump's inauguration. Getting the feeling that standing up for equality is something I'm passionate about. Ashley Judd reciting Nina Donovan's I am a nasty woman was powerful. I hope Trump is going to fuck up big time so people will wake up now and make America actually great again. He's just going to make us stand closer together.

Taking a moment in a club (even though being in a glum mood) to appreciate how great it is to stand in a room full of dancing people, listening to really loud rock music (fun, too, you know - Ballroom Blitz!).

Tiny embroideries.

Deciding on brushing up my French (I'm going to Paris next month!!). Earning more than 1300xp in DuoLingo on a slow Saturday.

Smorfia neapolitana. Crazy Italians. I saw one of these posters in Travel Man and liked the idea a lot.

Nachtbad - they turned an old sauna club in the gay part of the city into a bar, and they even left the showers running. Nice venue.

Hamlet at Munich Kammerspiele. Buckets full of blood and a confetti hose. I loved it.

A healthy dose of cat content. Watching the streetcat Bob movie with Doris and visiting Fricki at home where I got to know Effi the cat. She loved me and sat on my shoulder; even slept like a baby on my arm.

Spending a day in the city instead of going to work (even though I had to attend a workshop). Walking through streets I rarely visit. Getting beautiful and unusual (pumpkin, truffle, rosemary...) macarons at Principessa's and having a chat with the owner. Having dinner at the Victorian House, walking over Viktualienmarkt, stopping at a fruit vendor for some blueberries, getting a necklace at &otherstories and rice papier at the Asian food store.

Outside our classroom we saw a fox running through the snow! I was just as excited about that as the children.

Taking a screen printing class! We were only 4 people and the teacher was really nice so we spent the whole Saturday making prints. I want my own screen now... gotta find out where to get or how to build one! I printed a Sleater-Kinney picture on a tote bag, by the way. "Nasty women!"

The dad in the whole food market who showed his son a monkey toy with a long tail and laughed out loud because it looked like a dick.

Seeing a small piece of rainbow over the street I take every day!

Desire paths.

Making summer rolls with peanut dip. And cooking the same dish Fricki made for me the other day: pumpkin, zucchini, thyme and feta. Delicious.