#listen if you delulu hard enough anything is possible

[froggerland]

No thoughts just sojoplittle challengers dynamic

[thatanimewriter]

LOVE ME RIGHT.

➳ request: Hiiiii! Dunno if you’re taking requests but if you are- then here: maybe could you do JJK characters love language? If you don’t want to do all/some then maybe just Maki. Thanks you for reading! Stay healthy and safe<3

➳ character/s: itadori yuuji, fushiguro megumi, kugisaki nobara, inumaki toge, zen'in maki

➳ warnings: mention of food (megumi)

➳ notes: omg the babiesss, i love this ;v;

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 / 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭  / 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 / 𝐰𝐢𝐩 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

── 𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈 𝐘𝐔𝐔𝐉𝐈.

receiving: physical touch, quality time

he will never deny a cuddle and will, in fact, ask for them every night

you just gotta sneak into his dorm, cause he hugs pillows or plushies probably, but prefers if it's you

he's sensitive about death because of everything that's been going on, so he wants to spend a lotta time with you

you both get fulfilling lives that way, and he feels secure knowing he didn't take you for granted

giving: acts of service, words of affirmation

your little butler omg, he would wait on you ANY TIME he can and will resist complaining about it

wants to make sure you KNOW you're treasured and will never let you doubt that

reinforces that message with the things he says about you, he's a compliment machine

would never give you up, let you down, run around and desert you, make you cry, say goodbye, tell a lie, or hurt you-

── 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈.

receiving: gift giving (??), acts of service

he's not a very materialistic person, but any HANDMADE gifts, he's keeping those til the day he DIES

appreciates the time you put in to doing something nice for him or finding something that he would like

similarly appreciates any silent affection like getting him his favourite drink without asking

or making sure he eats if he's busy training and might forget to in lieu of getting stronger

giving: quality time, acts of service

he's not one to shower you in flowery language or anything, but he'll enjoy your company and keep you company

likes to be near you, but you don't necessarily have to talk, he just wants you to know he's there and he'll listen

will also return favours like making your bed all nice in the morning or buying you things you're slowly running out of

he's just observant like that, you'd probably never know you're low on deodorant or something when he buys more before it's empty

── 𝐊𝐔𝐆𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐊𝐈 𝐍𝐎𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐀.

receiving: gift giving, words of affirmation

treat her like a princess and you're staying forever, no doubt in her mind

she loves a good shop, and bonus if she gets stuff she wants without paying herself-

likes being told how great she is and stuff, especially in moments of insecurity or fear

helps her feel less delulu about herself (or it could be you feeding into her fantasies just to see her smile-)

giving: words of affirmation, physical touch (??)

greatest hypewoman you'll ever have, the absolute number 1 cheerleader for you

makes sure you both feel like total icons as much as possible and will go so hard if you have a bad day

might reward you with a lil kiss, and she might feel the need to pamper you

probably not entirely clingy, but even just touching knees or being shoulder to shoulder is enough for her :))

── 𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐈 𝐓𝐎𝐆𝐄.

receiving: physical touch, quality time

i feel like if you give him words of affirmation, he'd feel kinda shitty about not being able to say those things back

he likes just being able to spend time with you and enjoy your presence and the things you do together

little koala bear at night time, dude loves a cuddle and will hide his face in your neck

i hope you went to the bathroom before cuddles, cause you're not getting up any time soon

giving: physical touch, acts of service

a lot of wordless forms of expressing love, because he wants you to know he loves you so much but without cursing you

head pats and lil kisses galore, you'll never be touch starved with him around

will do stuff for you to show he loves you, especially stuff he hates, cause then you know he's down bad

yes he hates doing laundry, but he will do yours any time if you're too tired to do it

── 𝐙𝐄𝐍'𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐈.

receiving: physical touch, words of affirmation

girlie is touch starved, but she doesn't HATE affection, she's just awkward about it

zen'in clan don't do affection, she's not used to it, but she's getting to enjoy the benefits of a hug

likes getting praise for things (also because of zen'in clan emotional constipation-)

an extra confidence boost that she didn't know she needed, but will happily accept, sometimes with a bit of a blush

giving: acts of service, gift giving

will do things for you to let you know she's got your back no matter what

also makes you realise how much she pays attention to you, because she does things you didn't realise you needed to do/wanted to get

gives you little trinkets that made her think of you on any missions she might go on without you

you're always on her mind, even if it doesn't seem like it, and the amount of little things you have from her is proof

[the-fo0l]

Micheal Scofield dating hcs

notes: it's criminal crazy kooky insane how little content there is for this show

warnings: gn reader, s1 lore, super soft fluff!!!! also idc if u think its out of charater let me be delulu

he's so babygirl

a very devoted boyfriend (im pretty sure i say that in all my hcs but its true!!)

just so soft and polite and gentle with you aaaaa

doesn't notice just how hard he's fallen for you until he has to be apart from you a long while

such a gentleman, his intentions towards you are always respectful

before you we're offical he had quite the crush on you

sometimes you could notice that cool, calm, witty demeanor of his becoming more bashful and jittery around you

daydreamed a lot about you and your potential future together. what it'd be like to live with you, to start the day by your side, how you'd show affection, how you'd express diffrent emotions, what you'd talk about, your niche interests and quirks— etc

slightly creepy but he did do a bit of research on you to make sure he hit it off with you as best as he could

always says good night and good morning, over text if not in person

just imagine waking up, still cuddling, but with a little distance so he can properly take in your sleepy morning face

him just gazing at you so lovingly, his gentle smile growing a little bigger seeing you open your eyes, then moving one hand from your waist to caress your cheek and murmur "good morning" with his sultry morning voice

GOOD LORDDD

he developed a new-found love for his job when you two started dating cause thanks to it he can properly provide for you

and provide he does

doesn't think you should have to work a day in your life (unless you wanted to)

he'd hate for you to stay at a job you're miserable at

super proud of you for all your accomplishments

when you have to seperate while walking to avoid something in the street, be immediately reaches back to interwine your fingers again

expresses all love languages in some way but 'acts of service' is his main one

amazing at gift giving and romantic gestures

just when you think he can't possibly out-do last year's anniversary/birthday gift he suprises you with something super elaborate and meaningful

absent-mindedly makes origami flowers for you at work. you'll also find them all over your apartment, some hidden, some in plain sight

at some point he started writing messages on them. some with the most loving praise you've ever heard and some w cheesy pickup lines

p.s. he grins ear to ear when he finds out you've got a special box for them all instead of throwing them away

when you're both still a little tired in the morning, or when either of you comes home after a long day, he peppers delicate kisses all over your face, ending with a deeper kiss to your lips

your touch just makes all the headaches of his day-to-day melt away

also takes both your hands and kisses your knuckles while looking at you with all the love and admiration in the world god lord

okay enough with the kissing!

always opens doors for you

compliments you often, and always uses words like stunning or beautiful instead of "hot

loves making you flustered with praise

he's an amazing listener, and he looooves listening to you talk

also, he's quite intense with the eye-contact

he thinks you're the most gorgeos person in the world what can i say

it might seem like he's not paying attention sometimes cause of how lost-in-your-eyes he seems but i assure you he remembers every little thing you say

nods along and hums a little to let you know he's listening

"i remember you said you liked this, so i got it for you" typa guy

you're happy = he's happy

will often sometimes call you to talk about nothing really important, more just for the sake of hearing your voice

and if you're not much of a talker that's fine too, the silent moments you share are never awkward

he's canonically super observant, so if you changed anything about your apperance or if you were in a bad mood he'd notice right away, even if you tried to hide it

great at comfort too, that silky-smooth voice of his knows exactly what to say

he's a very handsome guy (i mean cmon just look at him) so he tends to get hit-on quite a bit

he'd always brushed it off before but ever since he set his sights on you he's been very adamant on very clearly and quickly rejecting others' attempts

when he was making plans to break linc out of prison, a huge amount of his focus went to making sure you were kept safe during the whole process

having you be there from him after news broke and after linc got the death sentence already meant so much to him

so when he trusted you the broad strokes of his plan, and you supported him??? ohmygod this man fell in love with you all over again

yes, he was worried, but he had to tell you, spending days obsessing over prison schematics and getting full body tattoos is rather hard to hide from the love of your life after all

granted, he could have broken up with you and tried to rekindle after he'd escaped, but be fr he could never bring himself to dump you

you never know what may go wrong, and his love for you wasn't exactly a secret, so he took every precaution he could (as in like if someone wanted to harm you cause of your association with him)

he was still super anxious to let go of you

gave you the most passionate and desperate kiss before he went to prison

gets really really homesick for you

calls you whenever he can

would sometimes get teary-eyed from how hard he misses you before falling asleep in his bunk

would lose his mind if something didn't go according to his carefully constructed plan and put you at risk, cause there's not much he can do to control what happens outside foxriver. if t-bag ever found out about you he'd. freak. out.

he's willing to go to great lengths for the people he cares about (it's like the whole plot of the show), so you'd better not play w his beloved

on the rare occasions he has down-time in prison his thoughts always go to you and what you might be up to

he's surrounded by murderers daily and has the gall to be worried about you

sucre would pester him about his love-life a lot. insisting that he recognized yearning in michael's distant expression and saying that no single man could've helped him woo maricruz with that letter (michael writes love letters for you too)

sucre does eventually pull it out of michael and becomes just the biggest supporter of your relationship

this was kinda messy huh

[scoonsalicious]

Mother Pookie has fed her kitties well🩷🩷. There’s so many emotions idk which one i should talk about first?😭😂

BUT DANG chap 2.2 is just HOT

I am actually speechless😂 I have nothing to say except I am satisfied.

ITS SO GOOD OMG POOKIE? WHAT R U DOING TO ME? WHATT?!!😫😫

Lemme say, It didn’t take me long to hate Lilian. Like I swear, the moment she fucking said that Major looks like a SKANK gurl, fuck u.

My first impression on Major was like how Bucky saw her, a hot pretty dame that made me giggle like a teenager, making heart eyes and singing the whole world to my dick (if i have a dick)

And then throughout the chp, oh my goodness, I would’ve slap Leah the moment she starts bitching up. Major has a dang ass patience. I couldn’t.

THE THINGS I WOULD DO TO VOTE FOR BUCKYBABY TO BREAK HER HEART IN THE WORST WAY POSSIBLE (so far she’s 35% in my ‘dead’ list, better fix ur attitude if u don wanna end up like cunthage — ITS JUST BEEN 2 CHP?!)

Lindsay rubs the ick on me more than Jade (ofc Jade is worse but she dead now) but cuntly is so so so so so so so so so irritating. The absolute pick me, so called ‘one of the guys’. Ew. Even half of the team is irked by her attitude. That just says a lot.

Glad that our queen Major put her in her place. She needs more. Like, absolute humiliation (disclaimer: i dont support bullying but LILIAN FUCKING NEEDS IT)

And can we appreciate Wanda simping over Thor?😂 (you are not alone, i also dream of licking his abs — mhmmm)

Bucky and Major are purrrfect for each other. Its giving love at first sight 👀. Bucky simps hard. Like so hard. I can wait for more Bucky X Major scene (fluff,sexay — mayyybeeeee angst? i just love hurt myself)

Also, iMajor and Tony r absolutely gonna be ‘rich business badass besties’ and then them + Sam (Wanda and Nat at the back) roasting Leah. Oh what a beautiful dream~

Anyways, beautiful beautiful writing indeed. Waiting to see Bucky sexay POV next😂 Unleash the power of your blue balls. Also I can’t wait to read what your master brain had planned🌚. Love you Pookie🩷🩷🩷

PS// these past few days I was scrolling tumblr, searching for new Bucky fics/updates and honestly… I MISSED YOUU!!! I CANNOT STRESSED THAT ENOUGH!!! 😭 seeing your username the first thing when i opened tumblr made my night! i was planning on listening to songs, dwelling on my loneliness and delulu but LOOK AT ME NOW, ITS 4AM GOSH. THANK U POOKIE LOVE U HAVE A GREAT DAY

POOKIE! <3

Actual footage of me coming up to love on your comments:

I'm so glad people are enjoying 2.2! I gotta be real, I usually don't get hot and bothered when it comes time write smut, but that section? Whoa, boy... that section had me like:

(Yes, this is my second favorite gif of all time, and I will use Blanche to express my hot and bothered-ness whenever I can, lol)

I gotta tell you right now, the phrase "making heart eyes and singing the whole world to my dick (if i have a dick)" is now the highlight of my week, so I thank you for this. It's pure literary magic <3

Major is used to taking shit from peons; she was a woman in the military, after all, lol, which is why she's able to not let Lily phase her too much. Her patience will be tested, though. Where Cunthrage was just flat out unhinged, Lizard is more... selfishly insidious? Just, you know, she's not going to be kidnapping people and snapping their arms or murderously rampaging through Hydra bases or anything. (The stakes here are much, much lower, lol. Which, I guess, is going to prep us for Unbroken, where the stakes will be... Thanos-sized, lol.) I think what makes Lily feel worse, to me, is that she's far more realistic than Jade was. Like, I know girls like Lily irl; thankfully, never met a Jade (phew!). Much like Killgrave, to me, is the scariest Marvel villain, because I've encountered so many men like him in the real world.

The things I dream of doing to Thor would probably get me put on a list if he was a real person and not a fictional character, lol. Unless I'm doing AUs, I tend to stick with canon-pairings, but there is something about the idea of Wanda/Thor that I currently find very appealing, so hopefully, we will see something happen between the two of them. I think they would be adorable. And for some reason known only to my maker, I love making Wanda a little bit horny, lol. In fact, an earlier draft of Unwanted had Pocket referring to her as the Sokovian Horndog after she made some comments about Bucky's body, lol.

Is it weird that I don't plan on having Tony be too involved in this fic, because I feel like giving him a friendship with Major is like him cheating on his friendship with Pocket? That makes no sense whatsoever, lol, but I'm so protective of my girl. I'm like "Yeah, Major, I'll let you fuck Pocket's boyfriend, Bucky, but YOU CANNOT BE FRIENDS WITH HER PSUEDO-BROTHER TONY BECAUSE HE IS HERS!"

Bucky's got some sexy POV in the next sextion (see what I did there? lol) but there's going to be so much more smut in this one than Unwanted. It just feels right, lol.

[from-the-clouds]

You're so iconic for starting the Professor!Kendall thing. Dr Roy is a permanent part of my brain now. Every other thought that I have is about him, wondering what his life is like away from hsi family. Did he sell his share? Is he like Connor? Is he still part of the board and still shows up to vote sometimes??

I wonder if his father ever made stories about him while he was working at the university? is it NYU? Every time something Royco related breaksdown publicly every student just spends the entire class micro analysing his movements? Does he make snarky remarks about the company? Are there any students ballsy enough to straight up ask him about it in class???

Imagine the cruise thing is breaking news, it's all everyone is talking about and you have a class with Kendall Roy 💀. I know the entire university has to be waiting to find out something, people reaching out to staff and students trying to get anything.

So MANY thoughts.

Okay, okay, so many good questions here.

This got long so my thoughts are under the cut.

I think as far as his involvement would be -- the MOST he would be involved in the business is having shares and being on the board and occasionally showing up to meetings. However, because I'm delulu, I selfishly want an alternate universe where Kendall doesn't continuously get roped back in the Waystar drama, so I feel he has probably cashed out completely, and is just sitting on a fat pile of $$$. I also like the idea that he left in a sort of dramatic fashion after he was promised the top position but realized quickly his dad was never going to give it to him. So there's probably some tension between him and his family and he doesn't think too highly of the company.

And yes, I think immediately after he left, his dad probably made up all kind of ridiculous stories about him -- especially since Waystar's media brands usually have a conservative voice, there would definitely be a sort of messaging like "He couldn't handle the real world so he went to back to school" or like that gross saying "Those who can't do, teach". I feel like conservative media outlets love to demonize academia any chance they get, so there would definitely be those sort of shady sentiments. But I think once Kendall like, did it for long enough and stuck it out, Logan would probably eventually lose interest. The bad press might've made it hard for him to get a job as a prof at first, but the only the only real thing it would've done is driven a bigger wedge between Kendall and the rest of the family. I do like to think he still speaks to his siblings, but sort of holds them at arms length.

As for the college, I'm not really sure. It could definitely be NYU, or even Colombia, but I do like the idea of him being in more of an old school 'college town' vibe, not necessarily a school in a big city. I could see him wanting to put some distance between himself and his family, but I think he'd still stay on the East Coast. So maybe Harvard? Cambridge definitely has the right vibe. And he could be a professor who was also an alum. But I haven't really decided what the school is.

My main headcanon about him though is that he REFUSES to talk about his family, Waystar, any of the his previous involvement in the company. Not only is it a sore spot for him, so it'd be difficult to talk about, but he also wants to put as much distance between himself and the rest of the Roy family as possible. And nobody really knows the real story of what happened, and he never tells anyone, not even his most trusted colleagues.

However, that would not stop his students from constantly speculating about what happened, listening for context clues in his lectures, watching his every move when something big is happening at Waystar or with one of his siblings. It's like a known thing amongst his students to NEVER bring it up. Every now and then at the beginning of a semester, there's always one student who thinks they're above this unspoken rule, so they try to crack a joke, like "what's the worst that can happen" and he'll berate them in front of the whole class and kick them out just to send a message that it won't be tolerated. Maybe even you ask him during office hours if he got to see his family over the holiday, forgetting for a moment who he is and who his family is, and he gets really tense and awkward -- but he has a soft spot for you and knows you didn't mean to offend him.

And yeah, when the cruises scandal breaks, I bet journalists are reaching out to everyone around him, and he might make a remark in class like "Remember, everything said in my lectures are confidential under university policy" but that's the extent to which he'll acknowledge it. I could even see one day maybe a camera crew bombards him after class, and he remains calm and stoic as he walks to his car and drives off, meanwhile all his students are watching like 😳😳😳

In general, I think, similar to how he is on the show, he would really throw himself into his work and be super vigilant and serious about what he does, just to fill up how lonely he is and how hurt he was by his family. He doesn't show this part of himself to his students though, they just think he's really strict and uptight. But people definitely whisper all the time rumors about what they think happened, why he left, what his life is like now, how much contact he has with his family, but he remains frustratingly tight lipped and reveals very little about his personal life.

That is, of course....until you become his student and get to know him better. 😏

[nightswithkookmin]

Heyyyy I hope you're feeling better now I've missed you😂😂

Well you're the first blogger whose entire timeline I read when I started shipping jikook

On a recent post you agreed to sizzlingpatrolfox 's comments on jikooks relationship timeline about them dating only since 2019 or the assumptions about them living together. I'd love to hear you elaborate on that. Because I've believed that they've been dating for a very long time now so to hear that some of Yall believe they've been together since 2019 got me curious as the how you view their story.

I did??? 👀

Was I high or sommin? lol.

Must have been worms on mi brain child.

Seriously though, I don't think that was the bits of her piece I was agreeing to....

That much should have been pretty obvious since I've shared on here my Jikook timelines and dating theories a countless times and it certainly predates 2019😫

I've even gone back and forth with her on this a few times in the past. It's not my job to convince anyone Jikook is real or spell out the details of how they are real. I'm just here to ship, support and go my merry way. You can come with if you want. Good vibes only.

All that matters to me is that their bond isn't invalidated at the end of the day. As for the specifics we can agree to disagree on it.

We all base our opinions and perspective on information available to us and we filter those pieces of information through our personal experiences and understanding of the intricacies of human relationships. That's her perspective and I respect that. I don't agree with it but I'm not vehemently against it too cos free speech.

I could poke a ton of holes in her argument but frankly I don't wanna do that back forth

My ghetto days are behind me.

And quite frankly I just love to listen to or read alternative theories sometimes. I think diversity of thought is a beautiful thing. For all you know, she may be right and I could be wrong or someone else could be right and we are both wrong.

Anything is possible in this realm of delulu.

Since Jikook isn't officially out, I think we are all allowed to have perspectives on them as unique as those perspectives may be and I really don't think anyone is right or wrong when it comes to these things because we all don't know.

There are those who don't believe Jikook are dating at all. Some who think it's a possibility but aren't sure. Some who think they started dating from day one, 2015 and now 2019. In a few years to come someone will jump up and say they only started dating in 2020 or 2021 or 2023💀

If you've been in the fandom long enough these things aren't suprising. At the end of the day you just have to stick to your truth and this 2019 stuff simply isn't my truth.

Not because I'm obnoxious. I just tend to like my perspective on things a lot better most of the time because I trust my intuition and my analytical mind- it's one of my best features- if I say so myself😏

Of course, that's until I find someone else's opinion I like and prefer even more so than my own and then I'm kicking my delulu perspective to the curb😎

As it stands, I don't like her perspective more than my own unfortunately because that would leave a lot of plot holes in my head and would require me to pretend certain things that I saw and that I thought happened all those years before 2019 didn't happen.

It would require me to play dumb, disorient myself, play with my own intelligence, lie to myself, bamboozle myself, bulldoze my brain into seeing what is not there, believe illusions, and strip away my own experiences of sexuality. And that sounds ound like a lot of work to me so....

I'll stick to my own delusions.

There's no need to stress my brain like that

Jikook is really not hard to read. Whether you wanna read them as enemies to lovers, friends to lovers- they really aren't hard to read. They are either screwing or not screwing. In which case they are just really good friends who lack emotional boundaries and do really questionable things.

Whatever they are, they know it best.

All I know is...

they've. been. done. the. gay.

No one can convince me they weren't doing the gay before 2019. It's just not realistic. They had plenty of opportunities, and had the right incentive to do the gay from day 1

With all the time they lived together, I don't think they'd suppressed their hormonal teenage urges out of the goodness of their gay hearts or out of regards for the rules to wait till 2019 to decide it's the right time to fuck💀

Neither of them strike me as the patient type. Hell it's not even two years and the memory of performing on stage is fading from them and shit. Whatever sexual tension was brewing between them all those years would have dissipated if not acted upon or kept alive. Y'all heard Tae Kook talk of drifting apart right??? And they lived and worked together for years. YEARS.

Jimin constantly talking about how Jungkook flirts with him even casually- unless Jungkook was practicing flirting on Jimin and Jimin offered up himself to be used for flirting exercises by him-

I'm sorry but I don't have that much faith in men to believe that two boys waited that long to consummate shit. Much less two gay men. Much less two teenage gay Idols from Korea. Much less Jimin and Jungkook.

Especially Jungkook.

They did it your honor.

Jikook did the gay😢

Personally, I think in 2019 they were gearing towards the end of a journey not the beginning of one. Sis was just late to the party if you ask me. The best of Jikook is behind us not ahead- as far as the crazy stuff they do goes- its when they had less attention on them and when they were young naive reckless and driven by childish desires.

As they mature, as they head towards adulthood they have to dream a future, assume responsibilities, develop life goals and career paths, decide if living together is good for them, decide if coming out ever is on the table, decide if a relationship is feasible or just their fantasy.

There's a lot of adulting that's gonna go into their relationship. A lot of negotiations, a lot of we are not kids anymore are we doing this or not and where are we going with this. And to me, 2019 marks the shift in that trajectory.

Unless they decide to reinvent themselves and put some of us to shame... But then with this whole everyone suspecting they are gay thingy- good luck catching their best innocent carefree young love phase- which in my opinion happened a long time ago. Long before 2019💀

If they only started dating in 2019 then let's all agree at the very least that they were having vigorous gay sex before 2019🙂

I think it's an interesting perspective to have. But as I said, I see that particular time of 2019 as them being on a precipice, at an end of something that slowly begins as the dawn of another. Zero O'clock if you will.

2020 and 2021 has been and to me still is a transitioning period if I were to psychoanalyze them or look through my crystal balls🤣🤣🤣

It's a lot of individualism, putting the individual needs first, a period where each is embarking on a journey to rediscover themselves and find themselves. I've said it before and they each have been affirming it. From Jungkook asserting himself to Jimin working on himself.

Jimin recently talked about thinking a lot of his life purpose. He went through a similar phase in 2018 when the members later revealed they were thinking of disbanding.

Whatever is going on in their personal lives behind the cameras we don't know but it is clearly impacting all of them in subtle yet obvious ways. Let's not make too much of it and just enjoy the ride.

When that ship docks we can all reflect on it retrospectively. As I said, I don't like to theorize about a period when it's ongoing. 201 to this day and beyond is a dark phase for all of us with the pandemic looming over our heads. If they started something in this period damn for them. Really, damn for them. Because it's not gonna be as fun for them with the depressions their dealing with and shit. And shit.

If they started dating in 2019- was it before or after Jungkook's dating scandal? Or Jimin's Paris Scandal? Or Rosebowl or their new Jersey Vlive? Or MAMA, or Jins bdae Or Bon V 4? Were they together during bon v 4? Just curious.

Then there's the issue of boundaries that suddenly appeared within certain dynamics before 2019 which all pointed to a shift in Jikook's dynamic... I wouldn't know what to do with that.

When we say Jikook are dating, it's not just because they look happy together at a given time. It's a culmination of a lot of things especially as pertains to their dynamic with the other members and even the company.

In my opinion of course.

We are in a phase of rediscovery. I'm talking them refalling in love, or reconnecting, rediscovering things they like about eachother, re trying to spark things up or bring back old memories or things they both used to do or loved to do etc

It's Jimin reminding Jk during live, hey remember when we did this and that etc. I think I've talked about this???🤔

No?

I'm looking at Jungkook mostly to see what his energy is about. I don't know yet.

Jimin talks about wanting to get through his day at work so he can go home. He stays on the couch mostly, or goes to the gym and what not. He says he's changed in certain ways especially his being on his own- at first he'd talked about how he couldn't be alone by himself but now he says he's not like that anymore. He got his own place. He's fixing things on himself he didn't mind to fix before- there's a lot going on with him on an individual level and it shows. As a unit, him and Jungkook, not so much. And I can't tell if it's by design or sheer accident.

I'm waiting for Soop.

I respect the lessons this period presents to them and I love how much they are each changing and growing individually and however anyone wants to interpret it is equally admissible.

GOLDY

[alottamoney]

This is very frustrating because you can't be messaged.Nevertheless I would like to share something very serious with you. These are strictly speculation. Firstly I would like to clear my position with Taekook.Long story short: I believe them.

Quite recently I stumbled upon a theory about Taekook's coming out process that seemed very logical to me.The summary of the theory is, the art that BTS has been releasing from the beginning,or from 2015-16 to be exact, have been quite evidently inspired by Taekook's journey from discovering themselves, to then losing themselves, to then finally be able to find their happiness and true-self with each other.From Stigma, to DNA,to FAKE LOVE.A lot of BTS songs are talking about a hurtful love filled with sadness.Also, the kind of songs Taekook listens to and covered from the beginning traces that journey from sadness to happiness.From the official songs,Singularity, The truth untold,Heartbeat,House of Cards,Whalien,Make it Right to name a few.It's justified to assume that BANGPD supports them and love them.But if it is so then why the separation from time to time?According to this theory it is to prepare the ARMY very slowly to getting used to Vkook.We have seen since 2017 taekook is used to promote the Album the most,to hype it up,and once the Album's released,it's the watchful eyes again.BangPd was very supportive of Jkwon,a kpop idol who likes drag.But he also told him that you cannot throw a stone into a still lake and expect everyone to be fine with it.It will take a long time to get the water to settle down.What bangpd is doing with Taekook is he is engineering a very long process of getting people used to the message of acceptance through messaging of their album,love myself,be yourself.He is creating a generation that is used to these ideas so that when that stone lands,there will be no ripple.

Now nitpicking time.Tae and BangPD share a mutual dislike for each other.It's not a secret.Because Tae made it obviously clear on many occasions. Everyone in the kpop world knows it.Starting from Taekook's relationship, V was being portrayed as a non-essential member.Idk if it was a coincidence,but taekook is the king of coincidence and the timing somehow matches.It got to the point where he had only 1/2 lines in a song. If you know Tae's journey, you would know and I'm not gonna elaborate the extent to which it was bad.I also get the feeling he doesn't like Kookie's personality(he doesn't respect him) because he has a psychological need for Tae built in him.The golden Child of BTS.If BangPD is supporting Taekook and engineering their smooth coming out,and taekook are in on it,then why do they seem displeased when separation happens?It has happened so many times that there is no other option to consider than them being unhappy with the situation.

My pessimism will take over from this point.It's about money in the end.I personally believe BangPD supports lgbt.Before elaborating on my point I want to present someone else's viewpoint who I had a discussion with.They are even more pessimistic than me.A bit hilarious too.According to them if BangPD really supported Lgbt he would not try to corner Tae like that.It's an unwritten code among lgbt that you hold each other's relationship up despite your personal things.According to them BangPD used all these messages for marketing purposes and used Taekook and the members as a gimmick for it.That's why he was okay with Jikook but not taekook.Tae did not like jikook happening on stage to the extent it was happening but it was given a free pass in the name of it being just a job.According to this person,an lgbt supporting person would never do something like that to a lgbt relationship.Scary stuff.

Now my elaboration : BangPD is not necessarily protecting Taekook or BTS,he is protecting his investment. He wants to engineer a smooth path for their coming out but only under his term?I know before military it's unthinkable and even after that, my opinion is Taekook are not the declaring in a statement type couple.They prove by actions,not by words.That's why I am a bit confused as to what pd's thoughts are regarding Taekook future.All I know is that Tae does not like it when someone instructs him how to behave in his own relationship.He's been throwing middle fingers left and right to whoever can see.If they are not on the same page with Pd's plan for them,then....what?On a sidenote: I am sure JJK and KTH1 mixtapes are getting delayed due to profit sharing issues.You just know they are going to break every record out there.V said in 2019 that his mixtapes were ready for release that year,and he wanted to see how ARMY react to it and then he uttered something very interesting"It's going to be delayed anyway"..then he laughed in the brattiest way possible at the staffs while spoiling 😂 BH couldn't get that sweet sweet money from "Sweet Night".Going back to my previous point,it really seems like everything is connected to money.Does BANGPD want a situation where if Taekook have to come out,whether by accident or something else,he can be there to take advantage of the situation?Like saying he supported them all along,and the money will come in as support for them pours in.Idk how that will a viable situation.For one, Tae will consider eating poison before agreeing to letting PD use his personal relationship for circus,and it's fair to assume BangPD knows it.Then what about the possibility that PD really is like a strict parent,who wants the best for his children even though his methods are torture.Did he think taekook not being a couple was in their best interest?Taekook's interest/BTS' interest?Like I said, I personally believe pd supports lgbt.He doesn't like Tae's personality,his rebellious streak.I could be wrong but would his personal dislike move him to create tough situation for taekook even though he supports lgbt.It seems unlikely because wouldn't it create unhealthy environment within the group,pd must have known this.Or did he think it's just a teenage romance,one push and it will break easily.All of these possibilities because all I have gotten that TK are not happy when their relationship is micromanaged.

Now there's Lisa in JK's Vlive correcting his steps in Euphoria.Guess we are all delulu at this point.I really think that was Lisa though.Don't ask.I'm sorry for this long ask.Please share with me what you think.

Hi anon, I'm happy that you shared your views on Taekook. My opinion on this topic might be disappointing but I'll share anyway.

First, I don't have a coming out theory because I don't think any BTS member would willingly reveal any sort of romantic relationship because of the fan frenzy around them.

I don't analyze MVs, lyrics, and such because these things involve a lot of input from a lot of people: producers, composers, lyricists, designers, stylists, choreographers, etc. It's much more than just BTS sharing personal stories and trying to find clues about the members' private lives from them is a pointless venture according to me. The covers and song recommendations made by Tae and Jungkook in the earlier years, like you pointed out, have more weightage in this regard.

About Bang and his relationship with Tae and Jungkook: I think there is a large gap between fandom perception and what has actually been shown. While I don’t think Tae is Bang’s bias, I also don’t think he dislikes him or is out to sabotage him. It is even possible that him “favoring” Jungkook does not extend beyond his potential marketability. He seems indifferent for the most part to them as individuals. Assuming Tae and Jungkook are in a relationship, I agree that maybe Bang did not take it seriously until he had to. He could also have done a lot more damage than just separate them on screen or cut them out of content so I don’t think he micromanages them outside work (or may he tried and Tae and Jungkook are just that inseparable🤷🏻‍♀️). He might even consider it beneficial, not in a direct financial manner but in that it makes them easier to control and monitor- two less NDAs to worry about. It doesn’t help that Tae and Jungkook are also very erratic in a way that can’t be attributed to company micromanagement. That could explain some inconsistencies, they’re also figuring it out (and they’re a bit dramatic about it in my opinion).

Jokwon hasn't said anything about his sexuality explicitly, I don't know if this counts as an example of Bang's support of the LGBTQ community but he seems open-minded enough and he hasn't said or done anything homophobic. Tae and Jungkook though are part of his biggest cash cow so, while he might not be homophobic it's not a stretch to assume he has different standards for them vs Jokwon who isn't signed to his label. About using the members and Jikook as a gimmick, I think that is simultaneously complicated but also not that deep and it’s probably a separate discussion; in short, I don’t think Bang is thinking farther than taking advantage of and promoting a popular (easier?) ship but it seems to have affected the relationship of the members involved (Disclaimer: I don’t think that all permutations and combinations of relationships between the members have a possibility of being “real”. I don’t think it’s an everyone loves everyone situation.)

Will Bang or the company try to take the credit if Taekook are outed by accident? The way they act, I feel like they are pretty confident that no such thing will happen. In the very minute chance that it does, I think they'll wash their hands of Taekook and let them fend for themselves. I don’t think they’ve done the groundwork to benefit from such a situation nor do I think they are making it easy for Taekook. The narratives put forth in In The Soop and other content do the opposite of cushioning the blow. There’s no overall consistency and it’s really hard to predict how such things will play out, so I don’t know if they have any plans centered around Taekook right now much less back when they discovered that Taekook might not be typical bandmates. 

I'm not sure what you meant by that last paragraph but why Lisa?

[seijorhi]

asks :)

some of y’all have rlly big brains 🧠👀

What about Bokuto ignoring you when you suggest to go outside. He'll smile and hug you and changes the subject. When you try to bring it up again, he'll slowly increase his strength of his hug. A warning for you to behave 😬. I love you and your writing. 

Happy Birthday Daddy Owl.

First of all I’m sorry I was late for this bby!

Second of all YEEEEESSSS!

Bokuto is honestly so terrifying as a yandere! It’s not a punishment, it’s more like a natural response. He doesn’t want you slipping away from him, not to go outside, not to go to the kitchen, not to leave his side for a split second. And sometimes he forgets his own strength (does he though?). It’ll start to hurt, you’ll feel like you can’t breathe and your ribs are gonna crack with his muscled arms squeezing you tightly as he buries his face in the crook of your neck and coos about how much he loves you. But if you can’t breathe you can’t talk right? You can’t keep saying that you want to leave him. He won’t let you leave him. But maybe that’s better than the alternative. 

Keep pushing and you’re gonna get an emotional and upset Bo and neither of you want that.

the dynamic between akaashi/bo and reader??? you have me so interested ma’am I just love all your writing and concepts!!!

Ok ok :)

So basically the you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place here. There’s Bokuto, who drugged you at a party and delivered you neatly gift wrapped (hehe) to your completely enamoured and insane captor. He’s friendly, excitable and equally as fucked up as Kuroo (he was the one to kidnap you after all) and sees absolutely nothing wrong with the situation.

And then you have Akaashi. Akaashi who’s in some of your classes, who’s a sort of friend. Akaashi who should be more than a little concerned that his best friend has kidnapped you while his other friend is keeping you like a little housewife.

Bokuto’s all exuberance and wide sunny smiles, he treats you like you’re one of them, like you want to be there. Doesn’t question why you’re afraid of him - if anything, he seems to be more concerned with getting you to like him by forcing you into friendly cuddles and dragging you out into the longer room to come hang with him when Kuroo’s not around. He won’t listen to a word about how uncomfortable (how scared) you are. You’re perfect for Kuroo - he’s never been happier and Bokuto has no interest in upsetting this new balance.

And then there’s Akaashi. Unlike the other two you know he sees how wrong this is, how much you don’t want to be there in Kuroo’s bed every night - or there in the apartment with them at all. He knows you - knows that this is wrong, but-

But he won’t lift a finger to stop it. He’s nice to you, sweet. You think maybe he pities you, or maybe it’s his own guilt for letting this happen, but he’s the one you find yourself crawling too when you’re scared or overwhelmed (not when Kuroo can see - never when there’s that chance) but he’s also the one to watch you in the classes Kuroo doesn’t share with you. He’s a friend - was a friend - but now you don’t know how to act around him. Maybe if you push him subtly enough, he’ll feel guilty enough to help you - but be careful, because Kuroo loves his friends, but he didn’t sign up to sharing you, and he certainly doesn’t appreciate the odd occasional glance Akaashi sends your way when he thinks you aren’t watching 👀

Just read Gift Wrapped pt 3 and first: It was very good just like all your fics are and second: It made me realize just how weak i am for soft, delusional yanderes! Like a yandere that has no idea that you’re really scared of them and is also generally attempting to make you feel good 👌👌👌👌

Delusional yandere’s are so fun to write!! It’s soft but... make it creepy y’know? 👀thank you bby!

I just wanted to say

1. Outrunning fate is too good

2. I kinda freaked/flipped out knowing you’ll maybe write another part to it

3. I’m getting too distracted from doing actually college work because I’m rereading your fics

Out of all the fics I listed, this is probably the one I’m most torn about. I don’t mean to bait you guys and there’s still a possibility that I won’t write more for it, but fuck I just love the concept and dynamics between Toshi and Tendou and their poor darling soulmate. We’ll see, okay? Also that’s very valid sometimes i get distracted re-reading my own stuff instead of writing new stuff so, I getcha haha

Your content is nothing but superb and sinfully filling♨️♨️💓💓💓. I-is it okay to ask for more ushijima content? I love that brick wall so much and even had a delulu dream where i was his childhood friend who is always salty with him and when we met up as adults he caught on to my jabs and ended up getting railed by him eye-EJFJWJFA MY THIRST FOR THIS BLOCKHEAD IS DRIVING ME INSANE PLS I NEED HELP- SJXJSJCJ i love you rhi. Thnx for all your content👏👏👏

I’m writing an Ushijima breeding kink fic for a friend so there’s that to look forward to :) 

i too wish i could dream about getting railed by mr jima 😌

Gift wrapped was soooooo good! I can’t get enough of possessive and delusional Kuroo 😍. I love how you write from the pov of an unreliable narrater. You do it so well!

And now I’m also really curious about the dynamic between reader and Bokuto + Akaashi. Especially how Akaashi’s going to react to all of this 🙊 - @closetdegen

Thank you!!! I love from the yandere’s pov especially when they’re the delusional sort. It was fun trying to show the reader’s terror and fear while also having that fit within Kuroo’s perfect little idealised perception. It’s soft and romantic and fucking terrifying imo. Anyway, thank you!!!

the fics you mentioned writing extra parts to bitch askxjfhslg ALL of those are my favorites !!!! no pressure to continue any of them bc i totally understand where you’re coming from, but i need you to know that if you so choose to write another part for any of them i will literally rejoice and be so fuckin thankful 😭 anyways, love you & you’re amazing

Ahh thank you sm sweetheart!! 😭😭😭

Okay I know I'm asking a little bit too much but have you considered continuing on with the GW series? Maybe not fully fledged fics but more of drabbles or maybe short headcannons? You are a phenomenal writer that always leaves me craving for more 😭 There's just so much more I want to see from this world, like how Akaashi would react to seeing her since Kuroo seems like he would force her to move in, how their life would be now, etc. I hope you don't take this the wrong way! I don't want you to write something you don't want to. I'm just genuinely curious 🥺

Will I write another full length fic for it? Probably not. If somebody asks will I answer a bunch of questions and maybe do some drabbles/headcanons? Yeah, and that goes for pretty much any fic I’ve written. I love it when you guys react well to a fic and wanna know more. And thank you, bby!

Gift wrapped 🎁 part 3 was so insanely good that it made me want to finish acing my quizzes faster so I could reread it again 💖💖💖💖👀

asdfghjkl ily bby!!

YOO THAT KUROO WRAPPED THO- o m g I want smt where maybe this isn’t part of the fic but like a separate one where it’s a jealous Yan Kuroo 👁👄👁 u don’t have to do it it’s just a thought

Dw bby, I have some lovely jealous Kuroo fics in the works for you!! Also idk if you’ve read it already but Mr Perfect is there if you wanna see some feral Kuroo 👀

[jamaisjoons]

26-30 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

26. What movie would you want to live in?

Oh god, I would LOVE to live in Frozen 2. Like that forest would be AMAZING and I could just live in magical nature with the spirits :((

27. Which character would you want to be?

ELSA I WANT TO BE ELSA! I wanna be a Winter Spirit omg. I wanna be able to make flurries of snow and ride a water horse and have a cute lil fire salamander god pls lemme be Elsa fucking p l e a s e

28. Hugs or hand-holding?

god okay this is gonna expose a lot about me but,,,, hand-holding. there’s just something so soft and intimate about it. like I just want someone to hold my hand and entwine our fingers together and let me play with their fingers :( but like I don't like holding hands for long either - I like gentle, fleeting touches. when someone brushes their lips against your shoulder, or their fingers flit up your skin and it’s not enough to be like ‘hey I’m touching you, we’re being intimate’ it’s more like ‘i just want to know you exist, that you’re here in your flesh and blood and you’re with me’ like there’s just something so,,,,,, visceral about that. also by someone I specifically mean kim namjoon.

29. Morning, afternoon or night?

Night! I love the night! In particular, I love night skies and the stars and the moon. god, I adore the moon. but yeah, when I was at uni I lived in a suburban town that was surrounded by a lot of woodlands and it meant at night there was barely any light pollution - like I could go into my back garden and it would be completely dark and I could just sit on my picnic blanket in pitch blackness and watch the sky pass. like just stargaze and be myself, though a lot of the times I would play music. it’s like - you’re lonely, but with all those stars, the possible worlds, you don’t feel so alone you know? it also put so much into perspective for me - especially on sleepless nights when the : ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: depression : ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: was too much. funnily enough, I would watch a lot of sunrises too aha and then get back into bed and pass out from exhaustion jfnreoign

30. What reminds you of home (doesn’t have to mean house… just things that remind you of the feeling of home)?

Hmmm, okay so- not to be sof n delulu on main but,,,,, can I say Kim Namjoon? like no cap - he genuinely feels like home to me. and not in the sense of like I know him personally or anything because obviously, I don’t,,,, I mean more in the sense of safety and comfort. Like home is where you feel safe, home is where you feel loved and where the stress of life just fades away and to me, that is Kim Namjoon. When everything is too much, when life feels grey, when I feel like I can’t do things or that everything is getting to much, I just sit by myself and listen to Mono and suddenly, everything is okay. I know I can play it on repeat and just come home to him, and the comfort and security he offers through that one album. Like there were days in university where I was just existing and even that was too much, but I could just sit in my room, with the doors closed and play mono and everythingoes would remind me that yeah it’s bad and yeah things are hard, but god it would pass. and it always did. without fail, it would pass and i would eventually get out of the slump- but without mono and without everythingoes and more importantly, without kim namjoon that would never have happened.

i’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, a hundred times over, but like without him, I don’t think I’d be who I am. He pulled me out of a slump i existed in for years and I will forever be grateful to him for that. so yeah, as stupid as it sounds, kim namjoon is my home. his voice, the tender love, the gentle comfort, the words of inspiration and the wisdom he offers, it’s all just things I find security and safety in and he’s what home feels like.

anyway 🤡

[teudoongievibes]

Camren Goggles™ on: “Consequences”

Hola sweets! Here’s my first lyrics analyze/theory post of the album “CAMILA” - I’m starting by my favorite song of the album “Consequences”, because I had a lot to say about it, because it spoke to my Camren heart like no other song ever did, and I think the structure and the lyrics of this song are pure genius. 

If you happen to notice the name of my tumblr then you might have understood that those theories are gonna be referencing Camren. If you don’t believe in Camren, or are not familiar with it, then some part of this theory might not resonate with you, and before you go messaging me about how much you don’t agree with everything I wrote, let me tell you that I don’t care much about what you have to say. I’m completely open to discuss and debate with people who are part of the Camren fandom, but anyone who feels like trying to change my mind about whether or not Camren was real or feel the need to insult me anonymously, I won’t waste my time on, so I suggest you don’t waste yours. 

Now that that’s clear, let’s get this Camren party started!

Disclaimer : all that I wrote is pure theory based on my personal delulu thoughts, many other interpretations can be made of the song

“Consequences”

Dirty tissues, trust issues Glasses on the sink, they didn’t fix you Lonely pillows in a stranger’s bed Little voices in my head Secret keeping, stop the bleeding Lost a little weight because I wasn’t eating All the souls that I can’t listen to, to tell the truth

Alright, first verse, obviously Camila isn’t telling a fairytale, we understand real quick that it’s about a relationship that went downhill *cue Camren tears*

This very first verse is very interesting, a lot to say there, so I’ll give my thoughts sentence by sentence for this one.

“Dirty tissues, trust issues”  

To me this very first sentence is already making me think that she’s talking about a relationship that lasted a while. There’s history there, and apparently an accumulation of problems.

“Glasses on the sink, they didn’t fix you“ 

Okay the way I interpret that sentence is that glasses are supposed to make you see things differently, they usually make you see better, clearer. Maybe what Camila is trying to say here is that even though that person tried to see things differently and have a different perspective, it still wasn’t enough to fix whatever problem they had or how they were feeling about certain things, and most importantly themselves - that can be emphasized by the fact that the glasses are on the sink, what do you have usually above a sink? A mirror.  

If you translate it in Camren theory, and that Camila is talking about Lauren, then maybe it’s about the fact that even if Lauren wanted to see the world as a better place, where coming out would be a positive thing to change the world even just a little bit for the better, it still wasn’t enough to fix her insecurities and quiet her fears.

Update : someone pointed out that the glasses could also be empty glasses from drinking alcohol. And that’s also definitely a possibility, depending if you imagine a kitchen or a bathroom I guess 😂

Update to the update : I’ve seen that a lot of you see the glasses as drinking glasses because you think that somehow Lauren is an heavy drinker. I personally never saw Lauren that way, especially if we take in the fact that this song would be about events that happened more than 3 years ago, not yesterday. Back then she was barely 17, and although I know very well that being in the industry alcohol and drugs are around no matter if you’re of legal age or not, I have a hard time believing that while being on a tour, having rehearsal,  and living with 4 other girls plus having the management team always with them Lauren could have develop an heavy addiction. I’m not saying that she wasn’t drinking from time to time like any person of her age, but I don’t think she was an heavy drinker.

I understand that since we see Lauren partying a lot more nowadays (she did turn 21), it’s easy to jump to the conclusion that this could be about alcohol, but I’ll tell you why for me it wasn’t the first thing that came to mind. 

First thing that threw me off is the preposition “on”, had it been “glasses in the sink” there would be no doubt as to what kind of glasses she’s talking about, but “glasses on the sink” let’s the interpretation open. Also I personally always take off my eyeglasses when I’m washing my face or brushing my teeth so that’s the first thing that popped into my head 😂

The other thing that stopped me from associating it directly to alcohol is the word “fix” - usually you drink because you either want to numb yourself or liberate yourself, but I don’t really see people drinking to “fix” something, maybe if you think of it as liquid courage which somehow could make you stronger or fearless, but still the word “fix” here seems a bit odd to me. Whereas eyeglasses by definition are meant to fix your eyesight. 

I don’t know, even if the reference to alcohol is definitely a huge possibility, I like the eyeglasses theory better, trying to fix what’s wrong by changing your perspective on life, that’s a lot more poetic don’t you think? 😊

“Lonely pillows in a stranger’s bed”

Two different ways for me to interpret this, either the “stranger’s bed” is referencing to an hotel bed, which will never be your bed, and by definition will always be shared with strangers. In Camren theory she could be referencing being on tour, and feeling lonely, maybe because Lauren couldn’t or wouldn’t share a room with her for fear of being discovered.

Or, the stranger in question is the lover she’s talking to, Lauren if you will, and the relationship has gone so bad that it feels like she doesn’t know them anymore -  “Lonely pillows” could refer to the fact that this other person already left the bed, leaving Camila alone. Which for me makes a lot more sense.

“Little voices in my head“

This is a pretty classic image to illustrate internal conflict - those voices could be telling her anything and everything. I’ll let you use your wonderful delulu imagination on this one. 

“Secret keeping, stop the bleeding“

It’s not the first time that the theme of secrecy comes up in one of Camila’s songs. Obviously it fits perfectly any Camren theory you could have. 

Again, “stop the bleeding” makes me think about something that has been hurting her for a long time, about a wound that won’t stop bleeding. The fact that she associated those two particular themes in the same sentence is interesting - is the secrecy what’s making her bleed? And if she’s addressing the person directly then is she asking them to stop that bleeding by ending all the secrets ? 

“Lost a little weight because I wasn’t eating“

Proof that this relationship really fucked her up, cause the creator of the Volcano Rooster wouldn’t pass up on a good banana unless she really felt bad.

“All the souls that I can’t listen to, to tell the truth“

There are different ways to interpret this particular sentence, but for me the “souls” are the people who always encouraged her to be herself and potentially to come out - people that encouraged her to tell the truth and that given the situation she was in, she couldn’t listen to. Again Camila is still in the theme of truth, lies, secrecy, honesty, and obviously having some kind of internal conflict about wanting to be honest but at the same not being able to because of the other person in the relationship. Well this perfectly fits in my Camren theory that Camila wanted to come out but Lauren was too afraid to. 

Then comes the chorus that fucks me up so good.

Loving you was young, and wild, and free Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound A steady place to let down my defenses But loving you had consequences

Those lyrics are pretty self-explanatory, Camila lays out how amazing it feels to be in love and the thrill of it. The fact that she uses the words “steady place” may refer to the fact that the relationship was something of a constant, a place that was safe for her - that would be the case if the relationship in question started out as a friendship. 

She ends the chorus with the title of the song, now we all know that loving Lauren had and could have had many many consequences on both of their lives. It had consequences on their friendship, it had consequences on the way the fandom perceived them, it had consequences on the dynamic of the group probably, it could have had huge consequences on their careers and basically their whole lives if they ever did came out or were discovered back then, and of course the biggest consequence was that it changed Camila forever and left her with a lot of scars.

Hesitation, awkward conversation Running on low expectation Every siren that I was ignoring I’m paying for it

Second verse, you can tell that it’s constructed the same way as the first one, and she’s basically telling us how slowly the relationship deteriorated. That all the things that she enumerated in the first verse led to this, that those are also the consequences of the secrecy, the trust issues and all the problems they accumulated.

“Hesitation, awkward conversation“

This sentence might be about the fact that she didn’t know how to act around this person anymore, that what used to be something natural is now something that she hesitates on. You know when you fight a lot with someone and you end up being scared of actually talking because you’re afraid that it’s gonna end up in another fight, so you end up talking about neutral stuff or not talking at all? This is what this sentence makes me think of.

And we all know there was a period of time where things were really awkward and tense with Camren, when they would stand 100 meters apart in photos, and didn’t even really look or talk to each other on camera.

“Running on low expectation“

She’s not expecting anything much from the relationship anymore, she’s not hoping that things will change, because she’s tired of being let down.

“Every siren that I was ignoring I’m paying for it”

She knew that things were gonna get worse but she chose to ignore all the signs, she chose to stay with that person up to that point, and now she has to suffer the consequences. It’s the first time Camila uses the present tense, implying that she’s still paying for it to this day.

If I think in Camren mode, this could also be referring to the fact that she also a lost friend, that the price to pay for risking this romantic relationship is her friendship with Lauren.

Loving you was young, and wild, and free Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound A steady place to let down my defenses But loving you had consequences

Once again the same chorus, she’s still reminiscing, until she says “no” in the next part.  No, ooh-ooh-ooh Said no, ooh-ooh-ooh I, no, ooh-ooh-ooh, mhm

I guess the relationship got to a point where she had to say no, no more of this. Loving you was dumb, dark and cheap Loving you still takes shots at me Loving you was sunshine, but then it poured And I lost so much more than my senses ‘Cause loving you had consequences

The last chorus is obviously the breaking point of the song, when she finally let’s go of the idealistic image of that love story to tell us that sometimes even the most beautiful connection you can share with someone can deteriorate and turn bad. 

The parallels with the first two chorus is pure genius. Let’s associate the words shall we? 

young//dumb - usually youth comes with immaturity, impulsiveness, you go right in without thinking, that’s the beauty and the dangerousness of it.

wild//dark - I associate being wild with thrill, and somehow having a secret and taking the risk of being together, of being discovered, can be a bit of a thrill at the beginning of the relationship, but then comes a time when the secrecy becomes a burden more than anything else. The fact that she used the word “dark” emphasize even more that theme, it has the double meaning of “being in the dark” as in being lost and “being in the dark” as in being hidden and having to stay in the shadows. 

free//cheap - this one is my favorite parallel. On one side you have freedom, a feeling you can embrace when you finally let yourself fall in love, let go of your fears, when you’re finally accepting your feelings for the other person - and if we’re thinking Camren then also finally the freedom to be completely yourself with someone, and finally begin to accept a part of yourself that might have been hard to deal with. And then on the other end the word “cheap”, what a harsh and yet so meaningful word to use there. The definition of cheap is this one : “of little worth because achieved in a discreditable way requiring little effort.” Basically any relationship can be beautiful and intense and full of love, but if you don’t put in the effort, if you don’t put in the work to make it sustain and last, then it slowly loses its value and becomes something cheap. 

Camila Cabello, you’re a godamn good lyricist.

“Loving you still takes shots at me”

Here Camila uses present tense for the second time in the song, again to tell us that even this relationship might be over, she’s not yet over it. The fact that she uses the word “shots” makes it feel like something almost violent, like a bullet in the heart. But “taking shots” can also refer to a verbal attack, if we go into Camren theorizing she could be talking about the part of the fandom that is still constantly coming at her about Lauren.

“Loving you was sunshine, but then it poured”

Pretty self-explanatory, not all good things last.

“And I lost so much more than my senses”

I’ll put that sentence in parallel with the first chorus “A steady place to let down my defenses”

There she illustrates amazingly how her perception of that person changed over time. The relationship used to be a safe and steady place where she felt secured but then it ended up making her lose all her senses. Different ways to interpret the word “senses”, she could be talking about the 5 senses, and without them you would be completely lost and in the dark, and she could also be referring to losing her mind. 

The fact that she says she “lost so much more” could again refer to the fact that she lost a friend. And that would be confirmed by the next sentence:

‘Cause loving you had consequences

Because I loved you, I lost you. That’s the consequence. Other possibilities would be that she lost other things, I don’t know, her confidence, her trusting abilities, her hopefulness… it’s up to interpretation.

Loving you

The song ends on those two words, I find it interesting that she chose not to put any tense there, letting open the idea that she might still love this person…

Alright that’s it sweets, my first analyze/theory of the album. I hope it wasn’t too much of a drag to read 😅  But I guess if you read that far then you made it through! I’ll add one more time that all of this is just pure personal theory and that there are many other interpretations of the song, which I think is what Camila wanted. 

Tune in soon for the next Camren googles™ lyrics theory : All These Years

I’ll end this post by saying that Camila is a fucking amazing songwriter, and that’s the gospel truth.