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#listen I don’t think a single man could be an exception to this rule cause istg even let’s say a dude with kavehs personality yeah EVEN SOME
kavehater · 2 months
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If a man spoke to me like this I will legitimately be like “😐 ok.”
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djino04 · 2 years
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Muzzled
Third day of @febuwhump with theme Muzzled
Takes place during season 2, after Saul's release but before Andreas' death. Andreas is under Rosalind's mind control so not very nice. 
POV Saul
To think I dreamed over and over again that I didn't kill Andreas that day. I tried to imagine how he would have survived and what our life would have been like. But today I face my former lover and I don't recognize him. He put students' lives on the line again today and one of them ended up in the infirmary. He lost a lot of blood and could have died. He only survived thanks to the older students who quickly brought him to the greenhouse. The man I loved would have come to the aid of someone in distress and yet here he did nothing, he even caused the injury with his silly and irresponsible fighting rules. I wonder what could have happened to him in the 17 years we've been apart to change him so much and turn him into someone I barely recognize.
I have a duty to protect the students since I am obviously the only one who cares about their safety and therefore the only bulwark still standing. Don't Rosalind and Andreas realize that they won't be able to create their army with the students' corpses? I can't believe that no one is trying to stop them, that no parents have intervened. What is the Queen of Solaria doing? Her daughter is here, she could be the next to get hurt or even worse... And yet no one stands up to Rosalind, like last time. 
So I am the only one who can stand up to the two tyrants of Alfea to keep the students safe. That's what brought me to Andreas' office tonight. But as I cross the threshold, I know that victory is still a long way off. This is quickly confirmed by his demeanor, he has his feet up on his desk, and by our first exchanges. I clench my fists not to hit him to erase the mocking smile on his face. Except that today, I am at the end of my rope. Too much has happened lately for me to stay in control. I know nothing good will come of it if I give in to my urge to fight him, so I start screaming. I yell at him, I yell at him that he needs to stop this before someone dies. But he doesn't listen to a word I say and he also starts raising his voice after he stands up. Within minutes, we are both screaming. 
But suddenly, our screams stop and I realize that I am unable to say a single word. It's as if my lips are sealed with extra-strong glue. I bring my hands to my mouth, not understanding what is happening. I try to spread them with my fingers but I am unable to do so even though I don't feel anything physically blocking them. I panic, suddenly having trouble taking a breath. It takes me a few long anxious seconds to realize that even though the air no longer passes through my lips, I can still breathe through my nose. The only thing that reassures me is to see that Andreas is experiencing the same thing as me. 
A fairy is behind this, I have no doubt about that, which is confirmed when Rosalind's voice is heard: 
"Ah, silence is much better, don't you think gentlemen?"
She gives us a mocking smile as she walks into the room: 
"Come into my office tomorrow morning and I may consider lifting the spell. But know that the next time I have to stop an argument between you two, it will be much worse!"
Then she turns to me: 
"Saul, you're not the headmaster here anymore and you may have to start understanding that. Andreas is your superior now and you owe him the same obedience you owe me. Farah is no longer the headmistress and these are my rules, you'll have to abide by them very quickly if you don't want to end up in Polaris. I don't tolerate any dissent among my soldiers, you know that. This is my first and last warning to you."
I try not to show anything at the mention of Polaris. The queen makes herself look modern by exiling criminals rather than killing them. But we all know very well that there is only death waiting for the men who end up there. It's a desert of ice with no chance of survival. I don't know why Rosalind decided it was worth my while to be pardoned, but I have no doubt that she will carry out her threats. I glance at Andreas who is looking at me with a smug look on his face. I guess I have no choice but to play along... for now. But for now, I focus on breathing through my nose and not getting anxious about everything that's happening to me. I'll have plenty of time to do that when I'm alone in my room.
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rocorambles · 3 years
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Know Your Place
Pairing: Naoya x Reader
Genre/Warnings: Yandere, NSFW, Misogyny, Abuse, Rape/Non-Con, Humiliation, Degradation, Feet Stepping
Summary: You should have known better than to believe that Toji could protect you from the Zenin forever. Once a Zenin woman, always a Zenin woman and Naoya intends to make sure you fully understand that.
Growing up as a female in the Zenin clan means you’re always expected to serve, to look beautiful. Never speak unless requested to. Never look any of the men in the eyes. Obey. Be submissive and demure.
There are thousands of rules and dozens of leering eyes ready to punish you for a single minor infraction. So as much as you hate the life you’ve been born into, you know better than to act out and bring attention to yourself, knowing full well especially now as an adult woman that the price of transgressions are too high to pay.
You’d be incredibly fortunate for the usual heavy backhands Naobito and Ogi Zenin would grace your face with when you were still a minor, for the cruel condescending words Naoya would sneer at you. Those were child’s play compared to what’s in store for you now and you shudder when you remember the images of fellow female servants who had attempted to escape only to be easily captured, clothes stripped and body laid bare for the entire clan to see. You remember the fear that would make you tremble as the men howled in laughter and jeers as they took turns smacking their victim’s ass, pawing and groping her body. You remember sobbing when you were forced to watch as fists, cocks, objects that you thought were far too large were shoved between flailing legs.
But nothing keeps you in line more than the cold dread you’d feel heavy in your chest when you’d be forced to clean out the room of one of your ex-maids, preparing the room for the next poor soul born into a never ending life of servitude. As much as you hate this life, it’s still better than being tied up and forced to be nothing more than a Zenin sex doll, used by every man in the clan until there’s nothing left but an empty husk of skin.
So you keep your head down, ignoring the cruel words and predatory gazes that follow you. You enjoy the few moments you have in the servant quarters alone with your fellow maids, giggling and whispering to each other, pretending that you’re just normal women. Those friendships you form warm your heart and you take solace in the sympathetic glances and warm brief squeezes of hands when a Zenin man is particularly harsh in their treatment of you.
Maybe that’s why you can’t keep your body still when the woman who shares the same room as you accidentally spills hot tea all over Zenin Toji. And despite how terrified you are of Toji’s hulking figure and blood-stained reputation, you throw your body in between him and your friend, creating a feeble physical shield for her from his wrath.
A part of you is together enough to vaguely acknowledge how strange it is that Toji hasn’t roared a single word yet, hasn’t laid a hand on you. But you’re not foolish enough to think this is over and you throw yourself to the floor in a degrading groveling bow, begging him to forgive your friend, to have mercy on the both of you.
You know exactly who Zenin Toji is and you prepare yourself for the feeling of his infamous sword slicing through your neck. What you aren’t prepared for is the way he lets out a boisterous laugh, green eyes glimmering in amusement when he sees the bewildered look on your face as you tentatively peek up at him.
“You’ve got guts. Tell you what. I’ll forgive you and your clumsy friend if you become my personal maid. Deal?”
It’s a rhetorical question and you stiffly nod your head, tears forming in your eyes as you imagine the rest of your life chained to Toji’s bed, stuck in the lair of a beast.
Except your life isn’t anything like you had imagined and you’re stunned when Toji barks at you to go retire to your own room and get some rest so you’re ready to keep up with tomorrow.
Life is...surprisingly normal. Well as normal as it can be in the household of one of the top Jujutsu sorcerer clans in the world. You scowl at Toji as he teasingly throws a pile of sweat stained clothes and towels on top of your head as he walks out of the bath.
“You’re getting a little stronger, little lady. I almost even felt the punch you threw at me in training today.”
You roll your eyes, but you can’t help the slight quirk of your lips and swell of pride at his backhanded compliment.
Toji isn’t anything like the rest of his clan and it goes deeper than just his lack of cursed energy or his supernatural strength. He’s kind. Okay, maybe that’s a stretch, but you genuinely believe he has a good heart. Not once has he ever spoken maliciously to you. Not once has he ever laid a hand even borderline inappropriate or suggestive on you. And sure, you don’t necessarily enjoy doing his dirty laundry, cleaning his room, and making his bed every day and night, but he makes it easy to forget that you’re just a lowly maid.
He talks to you as if you’re his equal, carefully listening to you, acknowledging your points (even if he mocks you when you do say something silly or that he disagrees with). He invites you to eat meals with him. He trains you deeming you too wimpy to last long without at least some basic defense skills. Your time with Toji is one of the few moments of happiness you know and you greedily indulge.
But unknown to you, your new proximity to the black wolf of the Zenin clan has more than one eye looking at you in interest and above all, Zenin Naoya can’t stop fixating on you.
Naoya has always had a strange mix of respect, disdain, and jealousy towards the older man and he can’t help himself from wanting what Toji has, especially when the both of you look so irritatingly happy chattering away with each other as if you have no cares in the world. How dare a lowly Zenin servant look so carefree. How dare curse-less Toji make a mockery of the rest of the clan by living a shame-free life despite how hard they try to humiliate him for it.
Has Naoya ever been happy? Ever been relaxed?
He can’t remember ever laughing as hard as Toji is now in response to something you’ve said or done. He can’t remember smiling so freely like you are as you playfully slap Toji and try to get him to stop teasing you. A green eyed monster slithers inside of him and before he realizes what he’s doing, he’s making his way towards the both of you.
“Aren’t you two as unseemly as usual. I know you don’t care for our clan’s reputation or rules, but really? Parading your slut around so shamelessly? That’s a new low even for you.”
It’s adorable how you scurry away, cowering behind Toji’s broad figure, fear written all over your face. And although Naoya had done this to get under Toji’s skin, he can’t help but wish the older man would storm off and leave you behind in his clutches. He wonders if you’d be this scared and docile underneath him, wonders how tight you’d be while you tremble in fear while he sinks inside of you…
His thoughts are abruptly interrupted as Toji snorts, slinging a muscular arm over your shoulder and dragging you off with him, subtly tucking you safely into his side and away from Naoya’s hungry gaze.
Usually being ignored and dismissed would rile him up more, but as he watches the two of you amble away and sees your innocent and confused face, unsure what had just happened and what’s causing Toji’s strangely touchy behavior, his appetite is whetted and you’re what he’s craving.
What he hadn’t accounted for is how protective Toji is of you. So strange for a man who doesn’t seem to care about anyone except himself. But Naoya supposes that’s just a testament for how good you must be in bed. He can’t think of any other reason why Toji would waste his time and efforts on an insignificant woman like you.
You’re never left alone long enough for him to corner. Just when he sees you by yourself and swoops in to shove you in a spare room, Toji suddenly looms beside you, green eyes sternly pinning Naoya down with a warning. And as much as Naoya would love to rise to the challenge, he knows that he doesn’t stand a chance against Toji, so he slinks away in defeat, again and again.
It only makes him want you more and he grits his teeth as he slams into one of the whores in his bed who vaguely reminded him of you if he squints in just the right way.
He supposes he should be more remorseful as the news of Toji’s death spreads like wildfire through the Zenin household. But all he can see is a light at the end of the tunnel. It takes every last bit of restraint in him not to immediately hunt you down and devour you, but he bides his time. After all the teasing and taunting you’ve put him through just one taste isn’t going to satisfy him anymore.
No, he won’t just ruin you and throw you away after a single night. He plans on dragging this out, using you, tasting you until it fully sinks in that this is all you’re good for, that he owns every part of you inside and out.
His cock twitches at your swollen face covered in salty tear streaks. You look so pathetic, so scared when he takes his time strolling into your room, kicking your roommate out and locking the door behind him. It’s just the two of you and he feels the rush of power thrumming through his veins at how you tremble and cower before him. If only you were naked and not in those dreary mourning clothes…
But he has ample time for that and he wants to enjoy corrupting you, take his time watching your downfall.
“You’re my maid starting now.”
You mutely nod, but make no move and Naoya scoffs.
“I know Toji was soft with you, but let me set expectations straight. I’m nothing like him. Now get moving.”
“But this is my room-”
You yelp in fright as Naoya’s hand grips the front of your shirt and hauls your body until you’re forced to press against his body, feeling his breath against your face as he sneers at you.
“Sluts don’t get the luxury of their own room or bed. Toji spoiled you. Now move your stuff to my quarters. The only place you’ll be sleeping from now on is my floor or my bed. Understood?”
It’s a rhetorical question and all you can do is crumple to the ground when he lets go, staring unseeingly at Naoya’s retreating back as he exits your room, the weight of your new reality crashing down on you.
Sleeping on the floor is humiliating and uncomfortable. Naoya makes it a point to “accidentally” step on you when he gets on and off the bed, rudely nudging you awake with his feet, resting his soles on your face until you’re flailing around to breathe. But it isn’t as bad as wondering when the worst is to come.
At least you’re clothed. At least your innocence is still intact. So as much as you feel like nothing more than a dog, you take it. After all, your new life isn’t so different from your life before Toji aside from your new sleeping arrangements and the headache of being in close proximity to Zenin Naoya.
It’s entertaining enough in the beginning, watching you curl up on the floor like an obedient puppy, admiring how you never talk or lash out when he literally walks all over you. He even buys you a pretty new collar with his name engraved on it linked to a leash he holds in his hand or leaves tied to his bed.
But unlike a real pet you never warm up to him, always looking at him warily, body tense and nervous in his presence. Not once do you look at him with even the slightest hint of affection or fondness you used to stare at Toji with. He supposes that can’t be helped and he doesn’t care for anything disgusting like your love. But you don’t even seem remotely attracted to him as a man and that’s something his ego won’t allow for.
He knows women can’t stand his attitude. But he also knows that at their base, all women are sluts easily swayed by his good looks. He can’t even count the number of women who’ve insulted him to his face only to end up in his bed, moaning and screaming his name and their love for his cock.
You were supposed to be no different. But your continued disinterest in him infuriates him to the point where petty humiliation isn’t enough to sate his hurt pride.
“Strip and get in bed.”
You’re frozen stiff and he sneers at you while you’re on the verge of terrified tears.
“What? I’m not good enough for you? Don’t act like you aren’t used to this. I’m sure your old master had you warming his bed all the time-”
“Toji would never!”
Even he’s stunned by the weight of his backhand hit as it makes contact with your face, by the venom in his voice as he spits out his next words.
“Don’t you ever say that name in my presence again.”
He takes a few seconds to calm his breath, the crimson of the blood trickling from your nose grounding him as he finds his center once more. But then a thought crosses his mind as that red river finds its way to your lips.
“As punishment, let’s make sure you know what your mouth’s purpose is from now on. Words are wasted on a dumb whore like you anyway. Kneel and open wide.”
It’s oddly arousing watching your tears and blood stream down your face as you choke on his cock. Your efforts are half-hearted at best, but he doesn’t mind. Not when the instinctual way your throat flutters around him as he roughly thrusts his hips into your tight mouth suffices. He can see why Toji kept you around and he groans as his hand slips behind your head and pushes you until your face is squished against his abdomen.
Your mouth feels amazing and your muffled screams for air only add to the vibrations around his shaft. It’s enough to have him spilling down your throat and he keeps you tightly pressed against him, forcing you to drink every last drop he gifts you with. And only when your throat finally stops its forced swallowing does he release you, leering down at your pitiful form heaving for breath.
The bitter taste of his seed is all you can taste, all you can focus on as you greedily inhale much needed oxygen. You pray that he’s done, but you whimper when a strong hand easily pulls you up and begins to pull off your clothing. Instinctively you try to push the invasive appendages away from you, but you freeze at Naoya’s growled threat.
“Don’t make me hurt you any more than I have to.”
You know it’s not an empty threat. You’ve seen the quite literally broken bodies of women who had resisted too much against the Zenin men, against Naoya specifically. So you limply drop your arms to your side and stay still as he humiliatingly gropes and examines you like merchandise.
All you can do is clench your eyes shut as Naoya’s hands grab your breasts, kneading and weighing them in his hands, cruelly prodding and pinching your nipples to see your reactions. All you can do is bite back a muffled yelp when he forces you onto your knees and forearms on the bed, squeezing and smacking your ass, spreading apart your cheeks to closely look at your fluttering holes. All you can do is cry into the sheets as he fingers you open, breaching both untouched openings, his thick digits stretching your tight walls apart and taking their time to thoroughly defile you, using your own slick to loosen your ass.
You try to disassociate, try to imagine that this is just a medical examination. But your fantasies are shattered when something hard and thick slaps against your inner thigh as Naoya rearranges himself behind you, rubbing the head of his cock back and forth against your dripping entrance, coating his shaft with your juices.
“Naoya! Sir, please. I’ve never...You can’t-”
Your pleas are cut short as his hand painfully strikes your ass.
“Shut the fuck up. You’re ruining the mood with your sniveling voice. Remember what I taught you? Sluts don’t get to speak freely. They only get to moan and thank their masters.”
You don’t even know if you can speak even if you wanted to, not when his cock is forced into you in one go, the thick and lengthy shaft ruthlessly tearing you apart. It fills you, stuffing you full, and you don’t think there’s even room left in your body for words. The only thing you can release is a strangled scream, eyes and mouth blown wide open, fingers clawing at the sheets as you try to remotely ground yourself as the foreign sensation overwhelms you.
But Naoya has never been a patient man and there’s a certain sense of entertainment from watching you struggle and writhe underneath him. He begins a relentless pace before you can adjust to the feeling of him inside of you, hips slamming in and out of you, heavy balls bouncing against you.
You’re so tight, so hot, so wet and he can feel a rush of power from the confusion he begins to see setting on your face as forced pleasure begins to mix in with your fear and pain. Moans and high-pitched keens are finding their way in between distressed cries and he smirks at the way your eyes begin to roll back in your head, the way your hips begin to meet him halfway, greedily pushing back against him when he teasingly slows down his pace.
He laughs at the humiliation and embarrassment running rampant on your face when you whine as he abruptly stops
“Wow you really are a slut. You fucking love my cock, don’t you?”
He rolls his eyes as you adamantly shake your head in denial, bored by your playing hard to get act. But as he admires the way your pussy lips obscenely envelop his cock, your pretty puckered hole beckons to him.
“You’re fucking filthy, clamping down on me like a bitch in heat from just a thumb in your ass. You like that? Like having all your holes filled? Maybe when I break you in, I’ll share you with the rest of the clan. Bet you’d love that. Love having cocks in every hole, using every inch of you.”
Your orgasm takes the both of you by surprise in its speed and intensity and Naoya howls in laughter as he resumes fucking you, chasing his own high with his thumb still lodged in your ass, groaning in pleasure at how he can feel the tremors of your orgasm, the way your body convulses in the aftershocks of pleasure and onset of overstimulation.
You’re breathtaking like this, fucked silly, delirious, just a warm body and toy for him to do with as he pleases and it doesn’t take long for him to join you over the edge and add to the sticky mess already inside of you.
With a lewd pop he retracts his thumb from your now lewdly fluttering hole, shoving it into your mouth for you to clean and he smiles at how mindlessly obedient you are as you suck and lick the digit clean like it's your favorite lollipop.
You grimace when he finally pulls out, already feeling his cum beginning to leak out of you and you try and find the strength in your trembling and used body to push yourself off the bed. It’s time to retreat with your tail between your legs and you want nothing more than to spend the rest of the evening in the shower, harshly scrubbing every evidence of your utter defeat and conquest under boiling hot water.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
You open your mouth to speak, only to quickly clamp it back shut, remembering how your words only seemed to dig you deeper and deeper into trouble.
“You’re going to wash me and yourself and once we’re clean, you’re going to remain naked and in my bed until I’m ready to use you again. Think of it as a promotion. No more worrying your stupid little head about cleaning and laundry anymore. You’re being upgraded to my personal sex slave and bed warmer. Come on, I don’t have all day.”
You wonder if this is what it feels like to walk the plank, to approach your own death sentence as you robotically trail after Naoya’s figure towards his lavish bathroom. And as you lay in his bed that night, pristine and bare like a glorified sex doll, his broad arm possessively slung around your waist and forcing your bodies to mold together, you bid farewell to your past life, dreading what the future has in store for you.
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spilledkauffie · 4 years
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Bingo
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 2.0k T/W: pure, stupid, fluff  A/N: you meet Bucky at a Bingo night ft. Yori ❤︎
it’s a little dorky, but I thought it was cute!
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Setting the tables with the rectangle cards, you smiled, straightening them out. Despite what your friends thought, you actually enjoyed volunteering with the local senior Bingo games on the weekends when you could. Feeling like they were often better company and far more entertaining than going to a club. It wasn’t a very big meeting hall, but that’s what made it feel so cozy to you. Hugging yourself when you finished the tables, you stroked the outside of your arms, feeling the softness of the cardigan you wore over your tank top. Sighing happily, you made your way to the announcing host, passing a few comments, as you waited for people to find their way in.
“Hey! Hey, look!” You heard a familiar voice; turning you found Yori and his usual group making their way to their table, with one exception. Smiling you made your way to him, arms still crossed, “no, I want you to meet her,” you heard him say to his friend, making you smile.
“Hey, Yori,” you said, coming to hug him, “brought more friends?”
“I- I’m Bucky,” he reached his hand to shake yours, to which you responded, taking his hand in yours.
“Barnes,” Yori added, reaching to slap a name tag on Bucky's chest.
Bucky took a deep breath, keeping his patience, as he looked down to the tag where Yori had written ‘single’ in parentheses, “yep. . .that’s me.” 
“This- this is the one I told you about,” Yori nudged you on the elbow pointing to Bucky, only making him more nervous as he immediately looked down to Yori with a questioning look.
“Ohh,” you nodded slowly, squinting your eyes at Bucky who met your gaze again, “you mean the anti-social grumpy one who’s scared to come because he’ll lose? That one?”
“Yes! That one,” Yori bobbed on his heels happily with a smile.
“What -I’m not-”
“Well,” you tilted your head, “I hope you have a good time and perhaps win something,” Bucky smiled, “but I think you’re going to need your hand back for that.”
Jaw dropping, he looked down to find your hand still in his, “right,” he laughed nervously, letting go, “sorry, of course.” 
You laughed quietly, biting in your lip watching him look anywhere but to you, mainly keeping his head down.
“Yori, you need anything you know where I am,” you softly placed a hand to his shoulder, “Bucky,” he looked up with a half forced smile, but you waited a moment, “it was nice to meet you, I’m glad you came.”
As you turned to walk away you could hear Yori whisper, “I think she liked you.” 
Followed by a quick change of subject from his friend, “I think you should find our table.” 
And lastly, “I know where our table is, and if you can keep your eyes off her, you’d see it too.”
With a giggle to yourself, you walked up to the foldable table that had been set up for you to sit at as usual. You were alone, but you were in charge of any assistance and you kept the first, second, and third prizes hidden. It was harder than one thought to keep curious seniors from nosing around for them. 
While the night was long and you stayed quiet, you were very grateful to have a little more entertainment tonight. It seemed Yori and his friends got their own entertainment out of teasing and poking fun at Bucky, who was a true sport through it all.
“Absolutely not,” you heard Bucky say. Looking up you saw him holding his card to his chest, with Yori trying to convince him to let him take a peek at his numbers, “are those the rules of Bingo?” Bucky shook his head, but another one of Yori’s friends tried to peek from his opposite side, “Oh,” Bucky dropped his jaw, leaning even farther back in his chair to keep the card hidden against him, “a double front attack? Really guys?”
Unable to hide your smile, you kept an eye on the table, specifically Bucky. Who after giving the group a few amusements, looked over to you. Blinking softly, happy that he noticed you, you lifted your hand to wave subtly. With another half smile, that was genuine this time, he raised his hand to wave, but forgot just how far back he was leaning in his chair. Soon, you watched him vanish from sight and he found himself flat against the floor, with a wince. 
“That’s whatcha get, you punk,” Yori told him through a laugh and an assertive nod.
It wasn’t long before there was a soft murmur of quiet laughs spreading throughout the hall, as Bucky reset his chair and sat properly in it this time. He pressed his lips together tightly and avoided everyone’s eye line, but yours. Hand over your mouth, you looked mildly worried, raising your half furrowed eyebrows at him, he could tell you were asking if he was okay. To that he carefully nodded, before turning to someone else who was addressing him at the table. 
The half way break came up shortly after, and you had to help a few people. When you looked back up from your table you saw Bucky, hands in his pockets and bouncing on his heels about three people away down the small line. Leaning your head to the side to see him, it took him a moment, but when he saw you, he gave a quick smile, before being spoken to by the elderly lady in front of him.
“You’re a very handsome young man, so nice of you to come play,” she said, to which he gave a shy thank you, as she asked you for a new marker, “he’s a very handsome young man, you know,” she whispered loudly, before glancing back at him, “and she’s single you know.” 
Ducking your head, you gave a monotone, “thank you, Mrs. Kasey,” putting your hands over your face, hiding the embarrassment, you composed yourself and straightened up, “hey, what can I help with?”
“Word is you got the prizes?” Bucky perked an eyebrow and gave the most obvious wink.
Half smiling, half jaw dropping, you looked around his hip to see Yori, who was keeping a curiously careful eye on his friend, shaking your head you looked up to Bucky, “so. . .they sent you? I don’t break that easily.” You crossed your arms over your chest, playfully, keeping eye contact. 
“Well,” he shrugged, “to be honest I’d like to know what we’re playing for too, I mean what’s our motivation here? I don’t know,” you covered your mouth, hiding the smile accompanying your soft giggles, “Why are you laughing? This is serious. What is the purpose of playing Bingo if you don’t know the prizes?”
With a real laugh at how hard he was trying to convince you, “okay, alright,” you reached under the table bringing up the prize in your hand, elbow against the table as you held it up, he looked down.
“A jar of jelly beans,” Bucky nodded, bobbing his head back and forth before a confident, “okay, seems fair, what about second place?”
You held up a jar in the other hand. 
Bucky looked between you and it, “that’s- that’s just a smaller jar of jelly beans,” he lifted his shoulders as if asking ‘why?’
“These people really like their jelly beans,” you admitted, “I figure you can guess what third place is.” 
“Seriously?” he dropped his shoulders, disappointed.
“Was there something you were hoping to get instead, Mr. Barnes?” You set the jars down, resting your chin on top of your laced hands as you looked up through your eyelashes at him.
He swallowed, deciding if he wanted to say anything, he winced as if he was going to regret what he was going to say- luckily for him the announcer called everyone back to the tables. He sighed, and you leaned back in your seat as you parted ways again. The evening remained entertaining with Yori occasionally reminding everyone at the table that if Bucky wins he’d share the prize.
Towards the end of the event, Bucky was the only one at the table still in the final rounds, meaning the entire table squeezed around him, glancing at his card and intensely listening. When the last number was being called, they all had a hand on Bucky, clinging to him like it was the olympics and he was their champion. 
“Seventeen” was announced and you noticed a sudden shift in Bucky’s demeanor, even though everyone around him was ecstatic, he looked like his mind was suddenly somewhere else, until he shook his head like shaking off a bad memory and he lifted his card. He didn’t have to say it, his group was already exclaiming Bingo enough for him. He came up casually with the other two, and you handed each of them a jar of jelly beans.
Bucky gave a ‘thank you,’ and took his back, but it was gone before he could even offer it to anyone.
“What’s the joke?” Yori held out the jar back to Bucky swiftly, “I can’t open it.” 
Smiling, Bucky popped open the jar in no time and immediately it was out of his hands again. 
“Congratulations,” you said behind him, making him turn around, he saw you had your jacket in your arms and purse over your shoulder, “I hope I’ll see you next month?” “Next month?” He tilted his head, “I thought it was weekly?”
“Volunteer rotations shift,” you explained, gesturing your hand in a circle, “I won’t be back until next month since we’ve got new volunteers.”
“Oh,” he nodded and there was silence.
“Anyway, I hope I’ll see you around,” you waved to him and to Yori as you left, pushing in the door’s brace open.
As it shut, Bucky furrowed his eyebrows, with a sigh, still watching the door.
“Go,” Yori said next to him and waved him away, “you’ll regret it if you don’t.”
Bucky took a moment to consider it, “take the bus okay? I don’t want you guys-”
“Yes, yes, we will,” Yori said, already turning back to his friends.
Smiling towards them, he started a jog for the door, exiting, he looked to find you. Already on the sidewalk, he met up with you. Obviously causing you to stop in your tracks and wait when you heard him.
“Hey, um-” he looked around, “can I walk you home?”
“Sure,” you nodded, smiling.
There wasn’t a terrible amount of conversation, but you liked his company and didn’t want him to feel like he had to talk.
“I think it’s really sweet what you’re doing, what you did tonight” you said, looking straight ahead, even though you knew he was looking at you, “there hasn’t been that much laughter in a very long time,” you exhaled sadly, “most of them spent five years alone, or missing out on seeing their grandkids grow up. I was so happy to see their smiles.”
“And what about you?”
You finally turned to him, “I was here, alone” looking down, you laughed, “then again I was alone before, so. . .” you bit in your lower lip, wincing “that sounded so pathetic.” 
This time he laughed with you, “no,” he shook his head, “I know how alone feels.”
Stopping on the sidewalk, you exchanged glances, “well, this is me,” you pointed up to your apartment building.
“Right, okay,” he breathed nervously.
“Thanks for walking me home,” you said, walking towards the steps.
“Yeah,” he ran a hand through his hair, “hey, do you- would you want to get dinner?”
“Finally,” you giggled, before turning back to him, “it took you four blocks to ask!” He gave a shocked expression, only making you smile bigger, “I’m free Sunday, meet you right here at six?”
“Okay,” he said happily, “it’s a date then.”
“Perfect,” you squeezed your arms, hugging yourself.
He swallowed harshly, before taking a step closer and leaning in to kiss you on the cheek, sweetly. When he pulled back, he looked slightly nervous, as if that was the wrong thing to do.
“You missed,” you batted your eyelashes, with a soft smile.
Bucky took a second, unsure if you were serious, either way he took his chances and met your lips with his. Somehow this one took you by more surprise, causing you to move your hands against his chest, holding on to his jacket, until he pulled back.
“Bingo,” you whispered.
3K notes · View notes
thesolferino · 3 years
Text
Favor
⤷ dream x f!reader.
⤷ genre: angst, fluff
⤷ word count: 8.4k
⤷ requested: yes, by this lovely anon!
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— summary: dream asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend for a day. things only seem to go downhill from there.
It started as a favor.
On a quiet night in your apartment when you stared at your phone for way longer than your eyes could physically take and rolled around on the bed, talking to one of your best internet friends, Dream, he asked you for a favor. His voice was muffled through the mic on his phone, the one connected to his computer way cleaner, but neither of you could bother getting off FaceTime and call on Discord instead - yet you still heard him loud and clear, because you burst out laughing right after.
“What the hell did you just say?” you laughed, turning on your stomach and opening the call, now entirely focused on the timer that counted every second you spent talking to him instead of your Twitter timeline.
“It’s embarrassing, don’t make me repeat it!” And for that sole reason, you wanted him to repeat it, loud and clear.
“Is this why you were so insistent on me coming down to Florida? So I could pretend to be your girlfriend at your cousin’s wedding so your family doesn’t think you’re a loser?” you laughed, finding the situation entirely absurd as he sputtered, words mashing together, trying to defend himself.
“No! No, I wanted you to come here because we’re friends and I-I wanna meet you, this is just a… benefit, of sorts.” he replied, and you couldn’t help but laugh even harder at his poor attempt of trying to save face.
“Alright, I’ll bite.” you chuckle. “What’s in it for me?”
“Whatever you want.” he responded, much too quick. Your eyebrows raised.
“Whatever I want?” you parroted.
“Yes.” he confirmed. “I’ll buy you something, if you want; I’ll even pay you-”
“Pay me?! I’m not a whore, Dream!” 
“That is not AT ALL what I was saying!” he cut in, yelling as you burst into a new fit of laughter. “It’s just… I sort of already told them I have a girlfriend and I was just hoping you’d say yes ‘cause it’s gonna be very awkward if I show up without the girlfriend in question.” 
You put your head in your hands and he sort of dryly laughed at himself when he heard your palm hit your forehead. “What is wrong with you, man?” 
“Listen, it’s not gonna be so bad! Just stay by my side for a bit, look pretty, we’ll get some drinks, and then dip. That’s it, I promise.” he reasoned.
“And here I thought we were gonna make out in front of everyone. What’s a fake relationship if we don’t make a show out of it?” you sarcastically snickered, and could practically see his eyeroll from miles away.
“If that’s what you want, then we’ll do it, by all means.” he replied and you laughed, shaking your head in mild disbelief.
“Alright, well, if you already told them, I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” you huffed, pretending to be way more bummed out about it than you really were. “I’ll do it.” 
“Thank you so much, oh my God.” he replied and you chuckled at the sheer relief in his voice.
A few seconds of silence pass. “What’s the catch?”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“How do you want me to publicly embarrass myself in exchange for this favor?”
“Personally, I think that forcing you to tweet that tweet about pissing yourself in bed again and also tweeting that everyone should subscribe to me isn’t “publicly embarrassing” at all.” 
“Maybe I should’ve picked a different fake girlfriend.”
“Sucks to suck, pissbaby.”
The weeks leading up to your meetup felt like years, with every treacherous minute of you two talking over muffled mics and shitty webcams feeling longer than it should, your empty apartment feeling emptier and emptier by the day. Was it even possible to miss a person you hadn’t even met yet? 
It turns out that it very much was, because as soon as the painfully long weeks were up and you were finally metres away from him, you jumped in his arms like a woman finally seeing her soldier husband after the war, standing on your tiptoes while he bent down the best he could to hug you back. His chest rumbled with a warm laugh when you turned your head ever so slightly towards his ear.
“Hello, boyfriend.” And just like that, the warm turned into a groan of faux annoyance while you burst into laughter and he pulled away, scanning your face with an equally annoyed look.
“I should’ve never asked you for that. You’re never letting it go, are you?” Yeah, you were kind of annoying with the amount of corny boyfriend jokes you threw his way - you had to give him that. But then again, he crafted his own fate and now he must accept the consequences.
“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t realise your majesty wasn’t appreciating the work I’m doing! I just won’t show up at that wedding, how about that?” you bit back, voice dripping with sarcasm.
“You’re such an idiot.” he laughed. “Give me those bags.”
A blissful week had passed, and he hadn’t pissed you off in real life nearly as much as you thought he would. It took a bit of getting used to to his family calling him Clay instead of his beloved internet username, and you did get a couple of suggestive looks from his mother the first few times she visited - you had a couple of “eye conversations” in which she never exactly asked if you were his girlfriend, and you never exactly denied it, but you knew both of you felt the weight of the unspoken words yet you had to keep everything secret and ambiguous. Or at least you thought you did, before he revealed to you that he told his mom the two of you were dating already. Seems like the glances were knowing and not questioning. Maybe you weren’t as good at eye conversation as previously thought.
Living with him was fine, mostly because he had godly air conditioning and a house that was probably way too big for him, and also a very cute cat that followed you everywhere and made living with a man for a full two weeks way more bearable. Finding out that he can’t cook was one of the most bizarre revelations about him that you’d had in the years of your friendship, and you demanded he watched as you made chicken wraps. You complained about how he was 21 and couldn’t cook for himself, he complained about how it’s 2021 and he can just order from Chipotle or something, dude.
A week of goofing around and trying to hide the fact the two of you temporarily lived together from the internet had passed quicker than it should’ve, and for the first time in seven days, Netflix was turned off and the two of you were dressing up for the wedding, ready to set off with his parents and younger sister. He spent ages trying to convince you to match with him, which was quite literally impossible because he wore a black suit and you brought a red dress, which resulted in the two of you roaming around a local mall at 10 am, half asleep, looking for a reasonably formal black dress, because of course Dream always got his way.
An hour of arguing and your fashion tastes clashing later, you picked an off shoulder black dress with a high slit, along with a pair of pumps, both of which you forced him to pay for, and went back home, ready to glam both of you up as much as humanly possible because you were not ready to let him show up in some horrendous pair of shoes and claim to be your boyfriend. 
“Is this okay?” you questioned, turning from the mirror to face him and let him be the judge of your shimmery black and white eyelids, spending way too much time on a makeup look for a wedding of someone whose name you didn’t even know. He blinked at you as his judging gaze washed over you like a wave, scanning you up and down while you nervously cocked your head, leg tapping in faux impatient annoyance to cover up the fact that you felt like prey under his eyes. 
“It’s… yeah, it is. You look good.” Dream confirmed, nodding his head at you in a movement that was way too quick and snappy and you turn back to the mirror with a huff, watching him stare right back at you. 
“Too much, right? I should try something else.” You say, grabbing your makeup remover wipes, but he cuts in before you can even wipe a single smudge.
“No, no, it looks good, I promise. Really good. Don’t touch it.” Something way too sincere in his voice makes the air tense, more tense than usual, but you drop it, deciding to just take the compliment with a tight lipped smile.
“Okay. You ready?” you ask, and he nods, nervously straightening out his suit before looking back at you with an anxious grin.
“Yeah, I think so. Do I look fine?” 
He did. He looked more than fine. You’d never seen him actually dress up for something and put proper care into his looks - he was practically forced into doing it by you this time as well - so seeing him in an actual black suit, all formal and expensive looking, messy dirty blond hair properly combed for the first time in ages, made you gulp and look away. You sort of never understood the argument that women and men can’t be friends because you were never attracted to one of your male friends, ever. Dream was born to be an exception to every rule, it seemed. 
Realising that you abruptly looked away, you attempted to awkwardly clear your throat and smile at him.
“Yeah, you do. Let’s go.”
During the ride there, his mother seemed to finally explode and the words that have clearly wanted to pour out of her mouth for ages finally came out. You supposed it was better for the poor woman, and did your best to suppress a laugh when Dream dramatically sighed and leaned against the window when she nosily spoke up. 
“So… since when have you and Clay been together? He’s told us absolutely nothing!” She spoke up from the passenger seat, shifting to look at you, excited smile plastered on her face and you politely smiled back, mentally noting that you’d have to bully the shit out of him for acting like his mom is embarrassing him in front of his 8th grade crush.
“Ah, we’ve been friends for a long while, but we only started dating a month or so ago, because it’s hard doing long distance and all that.” you said, hoping it would sound believable enough because the two of you rehearsed this a few days ago, writing out a whole backstory from how you started dating to what exact words he used when he asked you out. There were a couple of arguments here and there, such as the fact you refused to say you confessed you’ve been in love with him for years and he refused to say he admitted he’s been your “bottom bitch” for 3 years but in the end, you somehow managed to agree on a cohesive timeline of events.
“Oh, does that mean you’re going to move here?” she questioned, and that one didn’t surprise you either, Dream having prepared a full list of answers to questions that people might ask in your notes app. He was a perfectionist to the point it got on your nerves, but that had its own perks.
“No, but I’ll definitely visit more often, and if it goes well, I might as well move here.” you smiled back at her and she nodded, going back to staring through the windshield. You and Dream exchange a relieved glance that you hope his younger sister doesn’t notice.
“Let me tell you, I was waiting for you two to get together! He always talked about you, I was getting tired of him, you know that?” she giggled and you widened your eyes at Dream who, snapping out of somewhat of a daze, immediately jumped to protest, light blush adorning his pale cheeks. 
“No, I didn’t! I did not, mom, don’t lie to her.” he argued while all she did was laugh.
“Oh come on, it’s not embarrassing now that you’re together!” she kept going, and his younger sister joined in, to make it even worse.
“Yeah, you do talk about her a lot, not gonna lie.” she spoke up and his cold glare directed her way told you everything you needed to know, hanging on by a thread not to burst out laughing. He refused to even look your way, turning back to the window as his cheeks started heating up. You couldn’t help but let out at least a bit of a giggle, placing your hand on his arm in fake comfort.
“It’s okay, you can admit it now.” your tone borderlined on mocking and he knew you’d make fun of him for days to come so he stayed silent while the rest of the car burst into laughter.
The wedding was truly beautifully set up, set in a hotel wedding venue, walls painted in pure innocent white with hints of gold here and there, and you nudged Dream as the two of you observed in awe, asking what sort of money the groom had to be able to afford this sort of expensive venue. Nudging him proved to be way easier now, because you linked arms - you originally made fun of him for suggesting to walk like that instead of holding hands like normal people, telling him you’d look like you were at your high school prom, but he persisted, and you didn’t end up looking as goofy as you thought. 
“He’s a doctor or something, pretty sure.” he replied, quick feet trudging down the long hallways, your own struggling to keep up with him, especially in your heels. He seemed to be in a rush to sit and get it over with as soon as possible so he could avoid any nosy family members, but bad luck followed him everywhere, it seems, because as soon as you two entered the place where the bride and groom would unite, at least three different pairs of eyes locked on you, and you immediately saw a fairly elderly woman get up with open arms, staring at Dream with a grin on her face. You saw him immediately tense up, and almost laughed right then and there.
“There’s my boy! Oh, you’ve grown so much, come here!” The woman looked to be in her fifties and Dream let go of your arm to nervously laugh and fall into her hug, the two rocking from side to side as she kept going on about how it seemed that he grew taller and taller every time she saw him. 
When the two pulled away, her eyes fixed on you, judgingly scanning from head to toe and you suddenly realised why Dream tensed up the way he did - old white women sure had a way to make you anxious. Thankfully, he stepped in. 
“Aunt Bessie, this is Y/N, my girlfriend. Y/N, this is aunt Bessie, my mom’s older sister.” he generously offered the explanation you were so obviously lacking and you grinned, as if that information helped you in any way, and stuck out your hand in an offer of a handshake. However, she seemed to have different plans, because as soon as she heard the words “my girlfriend” her face lit up as if she won the lottery and her lips stretched into a smile, opening her arms for you the same way she did for him. 
“Oh my God, you finally got a girlfriend? Come here!” she said, shaking her head at your outstretched hand and gesturing you to return the hug which you quite hesitantly did, politely laughing as she hugged you tighter than you’d deem appropriate. Dream came from a family of huggers - that much was apparent from him, you guess, but you weren’t exactly prepared for this.
Aunt Bessie seemed to be way louder and screechier than expected, because the word “girlfriend” boomed through the room and off the snowy walls, and at least five other family members of his turned around to check who the lucky fellow that finally got a girlfriend was. Another one of his aunts seemed to notice the commotion and suddenly, another older woman with shoulder length, dyed blonde hair, along with her two younger kids, was hurling at you as well. 
“I always complained to him that it was about time he got a girlfriend! He’s a fine young man, no wonder you picked him, honey.” Aunt Bessie shot you a knowing look and you closed your mouth in a tight lipped smile in a feverish attempt to keep down the laugh that threatened to escape you. 
“Oh yeah, he definitely is.” you giggled, looking up at Dream again who looked like he wanted the earth below his feet to open and swallow him whole. Before you could nudge him in the ribs and tease him for hours to come, the other aunt suddenly spoke up.
“Clay! Oh my gosh, is that you?” she exclaimed, shocked grin on her face, and you briefly wondered if Dream ever even visited his family. He nervously smiled, obviously not really sure who this woman even is, but he hugged her back anyway, clearly walking the line between ‘happy to see his family’ and ‘insanely uncomfortable’.
“I haven’t seen you in so long, your dad hasn’t visited since we moved to Toronto! Look at how tall you are, you’re taller than my husband now! You used to be so tiny, whatever happened to you?” Upon hearing the word Toronto he seemed to realise who he was talking to as his eyes softened, and you wondered if he really was so expressive or you could just read him that well.
“I grew up, I guess.” He awkwardly laughed and she laughed harder than she should’ve before turning to you.
“Oh, and who is this?” She said, gaze periodically switching between him and you, a knowing smile on her face which told you she definitely knew who you were.
“Ah, this is my girlfriend, Y/N. Y/N, this is… my dad’s cousin, Mabel.” He introduced, large hand landing on your back, and you felt like you were experiencing déjà vu at the way her face lit up at the mention of a girlfriend. 
“Wow, it’s so nice to meet you, Y/N!” She said, energetically shaking your hand, before turning back to Dream. “You never told us you got a girlfriend! You’re finally planning on settling down, huh?” 
Your head snapped in his direction at the speed of light when she mentioned settling down, and you could see him tense up as well as he nervously laughed.
“Yeah, we haven’t visited in a while, so nobody from the family really knew. And, uh… we haven’t really thought of that yet, we’re taking it slow and everything.” He said and you were almost in awe at how good he was at bullshitting. The woman did nothing but laugh.
“Ah, don’t lie to me, I see the way you two look at each other! It’s your wedding we’ll be attending next!” She winked, and just as Dream got ready to fake laugh once again, her family called her over and she excused herself, walking off.
The two of you hurried to your seats as well, sitting down next to his younger sister. 
“Your family is insane, man, holy shit.” You laughed in disbelief, staring at him as he shook his head, clearly as distressed as you were.
“Literally nobody in this family gives a single fuck if I’m single or not except the old aunties. And I seem to have a shit ton of those.” He muttered under his breath. “The way you look at each other - I literally didn’t even look at you properly that whole time!” 
You cackled at that one, hitting his arm. “She’s right, Clay. You’re one fine young man, eh?” You nudged him as he groaned in embarrassment, only turning your way to glare at you. 
You didn’t get to tease him for much longer, though, because the organ started playing and the bridesmaids and groomsmen lined up, the groom standing at his designated place. The bride walked in, arms locked with her father, thin white veil covering her face as she walked down the aisle, looking angelic in her puffy wedding gown. Silky brown hair fell down her shoulders, curled towards the ends, and you could see the hint of blood red lipstick beneath the veil. She looked beautiful - the groom seemed to think so as well, because you could see him tapping the corner of his eye lightly, wiping any stray tears.
She finally made it to the end and stepped to face her soon-to-be husband as her father moved away, sitting back in his chair. The wedding officiant stepped up, and held a speech much longer than it should be, which just led you to zone out. 
One day you’d be beneath that veil, wouldn’t you? One day, you’ll face your fiancé the same way she is, and you’ll let your hearts link with a string that nobody but the two of you could snap. Who would that be, though? Who could you even trust with your heart in their hands? And you’re not aware of how and why and when, but your eyes shot up at Dream, whose eyes also glinted in that way where you knew he wasn’t paying attention, and maybe he was thinking about the same thing as you. Maybe one day, you’ll be attending his wedding, forcing one of your friends to play a fake boyfriend as he wipes his tears, waiting for his bride to get to him. 
It was disheartening, the thought of being a bystander while he locks lips with somebody else. You supposed you just liked being the center of attention, so you let yourself pretend you were his bride in your daydreams. Separating daydreams from rational thoughts was mandatory, because you weren’t sure how you’d explain to yourself that you can’t stand seeing Dream marry someone else. 
Dream, the infamous hopeless romantic, still seemed out of it, maybe even a little emotional, despite not being that close with either of the two. He was probably thinking about his own wedding as well, thinking about his future, the face he’d see when he pulled back the veil.
Just then, his eyes darted to yours, and you realised you were caught staring, snapping your head back to the couple that started reading their vows by now. You started going red from the neck up, cheeks on fire as you could feel his gaze burning into you. He turned back after a few seconds, though, probably assuming you stared at him because you were bored, and neither of you spoke, even though you kind of wish you did. What even is there to say, though? 
By the time you snapped back, the “I do”s were already being said, and her veil was getting lifted, showing her beauty to everyone present, and as they kissed the whole room bursted into cheers and applause in support of the newlyweds. The two exit, teary eyed, their parents follow close behind, and that’s when Dream’s family rushes both of you to your feet, following the two into the reception hall where the actual party would take place. 
From then on, the wedding is the same as any other. The two have their first dance, they give a welcoming speech, and Dream lets you stuff your face with cake and repeatedly refills your wine glass as repayment for dragging you into this whole thing. At some point, he stretches his hand out to you and asks for a dance like a rom-com main character, and you’re not sure exactly why he did that because he’s mostly terrible at dancing, but you had fun letting him twirl you until you got dizzy anyway.
You also realised just how much he did actually need a fake girlfriend, because it seemed like every twenty minutes some sort of relative of his would walk up to the two of you and congratulate him on “finally getting a girlfriend”. You ended up bullying him for that as well, wondering just how long he’s been single for if they’re all this surprised that he’s got a girlfriend, to which he just downed the glass of water he’d been sipping for half an hour and asked you about the weather.
His family took a few pictures with the new couple - you even got to speak to the bride at some point, congratulating her and wishing the two of them well, but in the span of a few hours, the wedding was over and the newlyweds made a great exit, signifying the end of the party. The two of you were driven home by his parents, and you waved them goodbye as you stumbled to the front door, your heels insanely uncomfortable and the red wine in your stomach weighing down on you; you just wanted to get out of this dress and into a pair of pajamas and pass out on his couch in the living room. 
That’s sort of exactly what you did - you half-assed taking your makeup off, wiping down your face a couple of times, deciding that was enough before changing into some worn pajamas and plopping down on the couch next to Dream who already claimed his place and sunk into the cushion while a random movie played on the TV. The two of you basked in the comfortable silence that surrounded you, the exhausted, tired type. You both appreciated the quiet and fell asleep sitting next to each other, wedding already forgotten.
That night, he went from Dream to Clay.
The departure was bittersweet. You left two days after that, your hug at the airport tight, warm, filled with a sugary sweet feeling you couldn’t quite place and sour acid that ate away at you because you didn’t want to leave in the slightest. His arms were warm, inviting, whispering for you to stay but you left anyway, waving him goodbye, setting off to home. 
It seemed like all your problems came and went with him, because a week later, at 3 in the morning while you were up editing a video, you got an all caps message on your Discord from Sapnap.
“YOU’RE DATING DREAM?”
You blinked at your computer screen, white letters blinding you in the dark, brain trying to keep up with why he even thought that. Within 10 seconds, another message, this time from Dream.
“so i told george and sapnap that we’re dating”
“don’t kill me pls” 
Yeah, you weren’t going to kill him, per se, but he definitely made your life a lot harder than it should be. You opened Discord, Premiere Pro and the unedited video abandoned, typing back to Clay quickly.
“WHY”
He responded immediately, as one panicked man does.
“they’ve been making fun of me for being single for ages now :(“
“we already did this fake dating thing before and it went perfectly fine”
“just play along for a month or so”
“pls”
You audibly sighed. And as if he could hear you, he started typing again.
“i’ll promote you on my channel more”
“just pls do it”
“you love me, right” 
Another sigh fell from your lips before you could stop it. Of course you did, because if you didn’t, there’s no way you would be playing into this. You typed back.
“fine”
He messaged back immediately.
“THANK YOU”
“LOVE YOU <333”
With a shake of your head, you mumbled “idiot” with the ghost of a smile flashing on your face, switching back to your video, opting to ignore Sapnap for a little bit. He could wait. 
Fake dating seemed pretty damn easy during the first week - you thought you were killing it by sending corny tweets and staged selfies so he could screenshot them and send them to the groupchat, giggling on call about how oblivious they are and how you’re fooling them so good, both of you opting to ignore the parts where they claimed they knew the two of you were gonna get together eventually. It was fun, lighthearted, and an excuse to flirt with someone you had nothing official with.
As much as all your problems came and went with Clay, though, they came and went with his friends as well, especially that hopeless man Clay called his best friend. 
Because yeah, of course Sapnap was the one to accidentally spill to the public that the two of you were “dating”.
George was streaming at what was apparently a normal time in the UK, not so much for Florida, and Clay was sleeping while you were watching his stream while making some food for yourself. It was going fine, a bit of a chill stream, and you leaned against the fridge as your oven preheated, tired eyes following his Minecraft skin. 
“Sophie, thank you for the dono! ‘Hey George, I love your videos, just wanted to ask if you were speedrunning with Dream today?’” he read out, and you could faintly hear Sapnap join the stream through your headphones. 
“No I’m not, Dream’s… I don’t know what Dream’s doing right now, actually. He’s not responding to me, though. Probably talking to his girlfriend still.” he continued, exaggerating the last part mockingly, still playing into the whiny role of being upset that Clay was ditching the two of them for you. That majorly woke you up, though, as you stood straight on your feet immediately, because oh no, nobody was supposed to know.
You exited out of the Twitch app quickly, letting the stream play in the background as you tried to fish for Sapnap’s profile on Discord and text him as quick as possible, trying to warn him to not let anybody know, but before you could do it, you heard his laughter clear in the stream.
“Yeah, Y/N, his sweetie poo.” Sapnap said, causing George to laugh even louder, before moving onto the next topic, and your heartbeat picked up an insane amount, nails loud and probably damaging your phone screen as you typed as quickly as humanly possible to yell at him because this was not planned, at all.
You heard him go quiet after you shot him a couple of messages over Discord (“SAPNAP” “ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID” “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU” “NOBODY KNOWS YET” “IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU”), type something to George who then fell quiet as well for a few seconds, pure horror on his face, and then went back to streaming as if nothing happened while Sapnap profusely apologised to you on his and George’s behalf.
No apology could fix what had already been done, though, and you were left alone with the warzone that was Twitter who had already speculated the two of you were dating long before while Clay peacefully slept somewhere in his house at 4 am in Florida. You bombarded him with messages and waited until he woke up ‘cause what were you even supposed to do?! 
You chose to spend your time finishing the pizza you were originally supposed to make and almost burnt your whole apartment down because you forgot the oven was on for a whole hour while yelling at Clay’s idiotic best friends. You yelled at Sapnap, who kept apologising to you, you yelled at George, who yelled back that it’s not that big of a deal because people were bound to find out anyways, and you yelled at Clay, because he was the guilty one somehow for not being awake during your breakdown. 
He did eventually wake up though, to the shitshow that were his notifications with at least thirty messages from each of you, messages from his other YouTube friends who were fairly surprised, and his entire fanbase going ham on Twitter. He was surprisingly calm about it - calmer than you were, anyways, and sheepishly said over the phone that the fake dating thing may have to go on for a little longer since you couldn’t just date for a month and then break up, and you were sort of okay with that.
And of course, the business side of him awoke at that moment, and he giddily told you about the amount of views the two of you could pull if you did the same shit you do with George and Sapnap anyway, but on livestream. 
You rolled your eyes.
And then agreed anyway. 
And so, the charade began.
His Twitter statement was up shortly, telling the people that you’d been dating for a couple of weeks and weren’t planning to tell anybody yet until a certain someone spilled their guts live, and the fact Dream was dating someone, let alone another popular streamer, took the internet by storm. You expected hate, and you got quite a bit of that, but the people that had shipped the two of you before were certainly more than delighted and a lot of Clay’s fans were supportive. 
Now, both of you had excuses to do chill streams together and just hang out and you took the opportunity and ran with it. 
You’d sit and play Geoguessr or just try and speedrun Minecraft a bunch of times for hours on end, doing stupid bits and things you’d be doing offline anyways, with a little more flirting than usual, because that’s what made it interesting.
“Oh this is France, for sure.” you claimed one night, two or three weeks after the secret was officially out, chewing on the fries you bought for this specific occasion, streaming on his alt to a few thousand people. 
“You think so? It could be Belgium, too.” he responded, humming in thought as he looked around.
“I know so.” you responded.
“How?” 
“I just do. Gamer intuition, babe.” you said, and he wheezed at your response, repeating the words gamer intuition under his breath.
“No, seriously. It is France, I know it is, I’ve seen so many pictures of that place I know it like the back of my hand now. That’s Lyon, or something.” you continued, plopping another french fry into your mouth.
“You have? Why do you know so much about France, that’s so random.” he responded, opening the map and pointing to France, although he keeps looking around, unsure of his decision.
“I dunno, I like it there. I wish I could move there.” you replied.
“Why, though?” 
“It’s pretty and heavily romanticised! Just like me!” you joked and he laughed, before letting you continue. “I dunno, it’s the city of love. Be a little romantic.” 
“The… the city of love is whatever city the two of us are in.” he said, and it took a few seconds for you to process the joke before letting out a fake disappointed sigh.
“I can’t believe I’m dating someone as corny as you.” 
At that, he bursts into wheezes, and you follow along, enjoying the sound of his laughter coursing through your headphones more than you used to a few weeks back. It feels nice, feels right, acting like this. You like calling him your boyfriend more than you think you should. 
A few weeks go by, and it feels all too natural. It feels too natural, talking to him first thing in the morning when you’ve barely even had your coffee, calling him pet names, throwing sweet words at each other publicly like they mean nothing. It feels all too natural, and nice, and all too right, and you don’t even notice when the two of you cross the line between public and private, and you’re stuck making stupid jokes about making out when you first see each other when there’s nobody to witness them except the walls of your rooms, but you don’t like thinking about that, because you know it’ll bring nothing but confusion. The current this that the two of you have is perfect to you, perfectly lighthearted and funny and fun, and you intend on keeping it that way, refusing to think about it in any way past jokes.
That is, until you can’t anymore.
It’s late, again, and you’re staring at his contact name on your phone screen, lazily lying on the bed. It reminds you of a night from roughly 3 months ago, when your whole friendship seemed to change in the few seconds it took you to process what he’d asked of you, and it feels weird, but nice.
“My mom really likes you, you know?” Clay breaks the quiet that you’ve learned to appreciate in his presence, and you exhale through your nose, the noise just short of a chuckle.
“Yeah?” You laugh, and he does as well.
“Yeah.” He reaffirms. “She thinks you’re a great girlfriend. Apparently I seem brighter ever since we got together.”
You laugh again. “I am a great girlfriend, to be fair. She’s totally right.” 
“Well, I wouldn’t know that. If you’re as good of a girlfriend as you pretend to be, though, then you’re amazing.” He says, and words fly out of your mouth before you can stop them. 
“Yeah? You wanna find out?” The flirty nature is nothing strange to the two of you, but this time it feels kinda different, it feels like you’re stepping into dangerous territory that there’s no coming back from. You feel like you’ve ruined everything, for some reason.
He laughs, like normal, though. He laughs like nothing happened at all, and you’re so, so grateful for that.
“Sure, let’s do it. You’re about to unpack the full Clay boyfriend experience.” He snickers and you laugh as well. 
“That means I just unlock the dick as well as the personality.” you respond, quick as always, and the wheeze that escapes him is so loud that it makes you laugh too.
“...Unlock the dick…” he repeats through another wheeze and you nod, laughing.
“Yeah! I mean I’m literally experiencing the boyfriend experience without actually having a boyfriend, it’s fuckin’ great.” you say and he hums.
“You could have one, though.” 
The implications are crazy, his words are crazy, he’s crazy and everything that he could mean and couldn’t mean by that is driving you crazy too, brain faltering and heart seeming way too big for your chest to contain it. It’s silent.
“I could, I guess.” 
You choose to say, and he switches the topic naturally, like he never said anything.
Things are never the same again.
It’s not in a bad way. Sure, it is kind of a bad way for the feelings you’re trying to push down inside you, a bad way for hot nights when the unbearable heat forces you to stay up even when you don’t want to and you have no choice but to think about why you feel the way you feel as you melt into the burning sheets below you, a bad way for when he jokes about finding somebody else and you feel your stomach churning. A bad way for realising that this fake dating thing is really getting to you, but not a bad way in general.
Maybe it’s in a good way. Maybe the underlying implications whenever he makes jokes about making the relationship real are good, maybe the way he calls you in the middle of the night when he’s anxious and freaking out and defends himself by saying: “You’re my girlfriend, you’re always there for me, I just figured I could call you.” and you end up wondering if it’s possible to say jokes in such a vulnerable state or if he’s serious is good, maybe the way it’s been a few months and he won’t tell his own best friends that it was a joke the whole time is good, maybe the way you confronted him about it and he said he likes having you as his girlfriend is good. 
Maybe the way the two of you are always walking the line between joking and being serious, between being friends and something more, between lies and pranks and emotional investment and fear of committing, and the way you’re always trying to push the other off, is good. 
The fans love it. The fanart is incredible (serves especially well for those hot nights when you can’t fall asleep and you scroll, watching yourself fall in love with Clay in every universe, tales told by people who observe your story and find it worthy enough to retell in their own words, to take the love you pretend to have and turn it into something real), people love to gush over the compliments he sprinkles in at random times during conversation and the general flirty dynamic is loved by many, pulling in more views and attraction for you. 
And you suppose that’s good too, but at some point, the good warps into bad, bad warps into terrible, and you wonder if this is all even worth the sleepless nights, wondering if he feels the same way.
Those thoughts haunt you more and more often every day. When you wake up, and text him first thing in the morning, your brain acknowledges that the camera is off - nobody’s around, people aren’t listening, so why are you still playing the role of a girlfriend and starting up a conversation with him when you haven’t even brushed your teeth properly? When you’re editing in the middle of the day and he calls to keep you company, making more stupid boyfriend jokes, your stomach flips in a weird way that makes you hate him, hate the way he can joke about these things so freely, like it doesn’t hurt him. Like it doesn’t affect him like it affects you. 
But, as much as you wish you could hate him, you couldn’t bring yourself to, and that was the worst part. Because, in reality, whenever he laughed you’d smile without realising you did, whenever anything exciting happened to you he was the first one you went to, whenever you wanted to laugh or cry or sit in silence for hours or complain you always went to him, the one person who you know would listen. In reality, whenever he made a joke about giving up on the fake dating and making it real, you wished so bad that he was serious this time, that this was what it took and he’d crack and all of your suffering would end.
It eventually happens.
It’s a pretty chilly morning, birds chirp outside and the sun that slowly rises is covering the kitchen floor in a golden hue as you pour milk into your cereal with one hand and hold your phone in the other, letting Clay ramble about whatever it was this time, when he brought it up.
“So, when do you wanna come down to Florida again?” he asks casually, and you almost drop the gallon of milk in your hand. 
“What?” 
“I said, when are you coming down to Florida again? Last time you came was pretty fun.” he says, and an empty silence follows. There’s an unsaid “I miss you” that you don’t hear, and he’s too afraid of saying it. 
“Florida wasn’t exactly on my schedule this month, man.” you say, placing your phone on the counter for a second. Clay sure knew how to surprise a person.
“Well put it down, then.” he jokes, and you hum.
“What, you got another wedding coming up?” you giggle and he groans - you never really stopped making fun of him for that wedding.
“No, I don’t. Can’t a man just miss seeing his beloved girlfriend?” It’s unbelievable how quickly dread can wash over you as soon as he makes one of those jokes. You were convinced the mix of anxiety and butterflies that appears in your stomach was gonna kill you sometime soon.
“He can, he’s just being weirdly insistent.” you argue nonetheless. “But sure, I’ll consider it.”
You do more than consider it - in a few weeks, you’re back at the airport, and falling into his arms has never given you such an adrenaline rush in your whole life. Something about having him wrapped around you, close to you, the warmth of his body radiating into yours sent you spiraling, head clouded with nothing but love and the fact that you wish you could stay there forever. You wished you could press pause and cherish the moment, let yourself bask in that feeling of pure love, pure adoration that you helplessly drowned in. But you couldn’t, and you left his arms feeling oddly empty. 
Hiding the fact that you were unapologetically head over heels for him proved to be a hundred times more difficult when you were right there, next to him, talking to him, when you could just kiss him any second, feel his lips on yours and nobody would stop you - the opportunity was right there, looming over you, the devil on your shoulder taunting you, telling you to do it. 
You got to wake up in the same house as him, watch his hair stick out in different directions and his raspy morning voice as he complained about the smell of your coffee, watch his eyes glint whenever he talked about something he liked and observe as he carried around Patches like a little baby. You got to experience every bit of domestic without the consequences of committing, and you wondered just how far this would go. For how much longer would the two of you blatantly ignore the fact that you were a couple that slapped the title “fake” on it because you were cowards who refused to admit what this truly was. 
Not for long, apparently, because you grew tired, and decided to put an end to everything on one random Thursday night - and if he hated you forever for it, then so be it. 
You were sitting on his couch, watching a random movie together, drowning in one of his Dream hoodies while you chewed the popcorn he made. It was dark outside, just past midnight, and you could see the branches of a tree swaying calmly through one of the nearby windows - the silence while he scrolled through his phone lazily was comforting too, everything was lazy and serene and it would’ve been perfect if it wasn’t for the constant anxiety that gripped you by the throat whenever you were in his close proximity, the nervousness that killed you, the upset feeling of wanting to cuddle up with him but knowing you can’t because you guys are just friends, and nothing more.
The couple on the screen kiss while a violin plays in the background - how fitting. Maybe that’s what pushes you to the edge, or maybe you were just that sick and tired.
You were exhausted, beyond exhausted. Your eyes were tired, the anxiety was morphing into annoyance and anger and you were ready to give up on it all. If this ended the friendship, at least you two had a good run. Your heart couldn’t take it anymore.
“You know, you still owe me a favor in return for pretending to be your girlfriend.” you say, and you sound gone, zoned out, more than you wish you were. You hear his phone turn off with a click.
“Yeah? What do you want?” Clay asks, and you blankly stare at the TV for a few seconds before turning to face him, eyes burning. 
“Kiss me.” 
It’s silent. The characters on screen are arguing. You hear the wind through one of his open windows.
“What?” he asks, voice cracking, and his expression falls. You’ve fucked it. Oh well.
“I want you to kiss me. Kiss me like you mean it. Kiss me like someone’s watching and you wanna make it believable.” you say, eyes boring into his, your words having nowhere near as much of an effect on yourself as they do on him. Your eyes sting like they’re being lit on fire, and your throat is sort of closing up, but it’s fine. “Let me have this before I go, because once I leave, I don’t wanna do this anymore, Clay. I can’t pretend like I don’t want you to introduce me as your girlfriend and fully mean it. I can’t lie to your face anymore.” 
Silence. Deafening silence, once again.
“I love you.” he blurts out, and you don’t even register it at first. “I don’t want this shit to be fake either. God, I really don’t. It hasn’t been fake for a while now, at least not on my part. I’m sorry, it’s just- it was easier to keep this bit going than it was to actually admit that I’m… into you.”
And once again, the room falls into silence, much like it always does whenever the two of you share moments like these.
And then, you burst into laughter.
“So… so you mean to tell me, that both of us have liked each other this whooooole fucking time, and just refused to admit it and ‘pretended to date’ instead?” you burst into giggles, and he looks sort of hesitant to laugh, but he does anyway.
“I mean… yeah? I was waiting for you to call me out for doing all that when nobody was watching! Why did you never call me out?! Don’t blame me, I made it so damn obvious that I wanted you!” he protests, and you almost can’t believe what you’re hearing.
“Excuse me? You should’ve just fucking told me instead of making a million and one jokes about how I’m your girlfriend! We’re not in middle school, Clay!” you argue.
“Yeah, but I thought you’d catch on and talk to me about it at some point! You never called me out for anything!”
“So what, I’m supposed to just read your mind now? You’re fucking unbelievable.” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest and turning away in annoyance. As soon as a warm hand lands on your shoulder, though, the annoyance melts like wax under fire, leaving nothing behind.
“I still haven’t returned that favor, you know?” he whispers in your ear, breath fanning your neck, closer than he should be. The hairs on your neck stand up as you turn back to Clay, who wore a mischievous grin and a glint in his eyes that suggested no good. 
You suppose bad can be good, sometimes. 
As his lips press onto yours, that theory is proven true, because he sends a flicker of fire burning down your spine, spreading into your limbs, making your fingertips electric as you pulled him in closer, hand snaking up to grip at his hair - the everlasting grin against your own proves, once again, to be no good as his hands slip under your hoodie and grip your sides, but you think you enjoy this sort of bad. 
They sneak up further, and you hear him chuckle into the kiss as your insides melt at his touch. The two of you silently agree that maybe he should ask for favors more often.
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phoenixyfriend · 3 years
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Jangobi 5 for the soulmate thing? Because that would make the fight on kamino just *chef's kiss*
soulmate au prompts
5. the one where you don’t know your soulmate until you touch them.
Apparently there’s never any skin to skin contact in the movie? Because armor? So......... we’re gonna just. Quick little thing.
Also I’ve been doing a lot of “marginally less shitty” Jango, but this is just-as-shitty-as-canon Jango. It’s, uh, not much of a romance, because Kamino. Actually it’s mostly just a lot of angry yelling about human rights violations.
...I’m sure they’ll get together eventually. It’s just, you know... it’s going to take a while.
------
Jango’s heard about this Jedi.
The man isn’t famous, or particularly acclaimed. It’s just that Mandalorians gossip, and Death Watch isn’t exempt, and Dred Priest still has friends in the terrorist group. So do a few others.
(Jango sometimes wonders if he’d have invited Priest, had he knows the monster was only a step away from being Death Watch himself.)
(Probably not.)
(He’d at least have been able to see the battle circles coming.)
Death Watch hates one specific Jedi above all others: Obi-Wan Kenobi.
It’s almost enough to make a man like the pretty bastard, except the reason Death Watch hates this specific Jedi is because he kept Duchess Kryze alive, and Jango isn’t much of a fan of hers, either.
In the moment, though, the main thing this all means is that Obi-Wan Kenobi knows Mandalorian customs.
First meetings, out of armor, mean ensuring the arm clasp has skin contact.
His eyes flick down to where Jango is reflexively pulling up his sleeves, and the man just... does the same, sodden as the beige-on-brown-on-dark-brown robes are.
Jango can’t just play it off. He has to, ugh, arm clasp with a Jedi.
Kenobi probably guesses how unpleasant this is for him, going by the grim little smile that he wears, the one Taun We can’t read and Jango can, but they touch forearms and le--
They do not let go.
“Oh kriff,” Kenobi swears, and then it’s just... it’s too late. It’s too late to stop anything.
“Jetii,” Jango spits as if it’s a swear.
He doesn’t want to be soulmates with a Jedi. No sane person ever wants to be soulmates with a Jedi, but as a Mandalorian, and as specifically Jango Fett, who signed onto this project for revenge against Jedi, the idea is just... excruciating.
“For revenge? Not entirely unexpected, but I’m still somehow disappointed.”
“Stay out of my head.”
Kenobi smiles at him, completely devoid of anything but the blackest of humor. “Are you staying out of mine?”
And, well, no. They’re soulmates. Kenobi has more of an idea on how to control how far his mind wanders into Jango’s, but in this moment, just seconds after being bound together by the universe... Jango’s slamming into Kenobi’s shields with an embarrassing lack of control.
“Is something the matter?” Taun We asks.
“I do believe we need to speak alone,” Kenobi says. “Unfortunate timing, but this is our first meeting, and it appears we are soulmates.”
“Ah. We were informed of the human tendency towards such.” She blinks, too large eyes impossible to read for Kenobi, but entirely readable for Jango after all these years. She’s irritated. “I apologize, but it appears we were unable to remove such unpredictability from the product.”
A wave of revulsion leaks out of Kenobi’s mind and into Jango’s. The man just nods. “I understand. As it is, I imagine that the near instantaneous communication on the battlefield will be a boon, if any are bonded to each other or to active soldiers.”
“I defer to your judgement as client, Master Kenobi,” Taun We hums, still irritable. It’s less visible in her face, but... Kenobi can feel it. “I shall leave you to get... acquainted.”
Aaaaaaaand she’s expecting them to sleep together the second she turns her back. The disgust she feels at the thought of such carnal activities is thirdhand to Jango, but he can still feel it, because Kenobi can feel it, because they’re soulmates.
“Oh, do tell me how you really feel,” Kenobi mutters, sweeping past him into the apartment.
Jango wishes he could slam the door as he storms after the Jedi.
“Listen here--”
“Absolutely not,” Kenobi says, with the kind of bland, impersonal smile that Jango’s heard Dred Priest bitch about at least a dozen times. “I need you to answer me this: why are you selling your children into what is clearly slavery?”
“They’re not my children.”
“You choose to be dar’buir, then?” Kenobi clucks a tongue, acting like he can’t even feel Jango’s waves of hate that are just growing by the second. “Shame on you, Mand’alor.”
“I am not the Mand’alor.”
“No. You are demagolka,” Kenobi says, the sweet words of Jango’s first language falling from his lips like poisoned honey. “They are your children, Fett. Your clones, just as human as you.”
“They are little more than droids, Jedi. The Kaminoans--”
Kenobi laughs, sharp and bitter, and it’s enough of a surprise that Jango stops talking. The Jedi strides closer, and it takes everything in him to not step back at what little emotion the Jedi allows through.
“Let me show you,” Kenobi hisses, putting a hand on either side of Jango’s head and it’s too much this is not a sense he is meant to have.
Kenobi cannot lie to Jango, not in this mental space. Not in this existence. He can cherry-pick what he shows, he can exaggerate, he can hide, but he cannot present a falsehood.
What Kenobi shows him, as he pulls Jango into his mind and drowns him in the sensation of the Force, is how each and every clone shines, bright and unique and so very human, so very sentient, so very alive.
These are your children, Kenobi says, directly into his mind and with no room to pull away. If they choose to disown you for your crimes against them, then that is their right, but until they do, they are your responsibility. You’re playing in denial and cognitive dissonance, soulmate mine. If I have to drag you into caring for your children the way any Mandalorian would, then so be it.
“Kriff off,” Jango manages to grit out in the real world. Kenobi looks unimpressed, when he lets go. The sensations in Jango’s mind, the jangled distaste and horror and anger, those are worse.
“Are you going to be dar’manda?” Kenobi demands. “You, who were once king of your people, have you really sunk so low to be the worst of your kind? To be so horrible that even Kyr’tsad would be shamed? Or worse, approve?”
“You have no place--”
“You are violating one of the core tenets of your culture!” Kenobi shouts. “You are being the worst of what you could be, Jango Fett! The most important, the absolute most important element of your culture, the care and nurture of children, and look at what you’ve done--”
“The clones--”
“Your sons!” Kenobi growls at him. “Your children, Fett. I’ve a student that is, by every Mandalorian standard, my son. I know what it is to take in a child that is not yours by blood, to raise a foundling, and you are cutting off millions that are your blood. You aren’t turning away an orphan to another family because you cannot care for them as they deserve, you are breeding your children for war like bantha to slaughter.”
Jango throws the first punch.
Kenobi throws the second.
By the time the fight ends, the room is in ruins, for all that they do not draw blasters or sabers. Kenobi has Jango on his back, straddling his chest with knees on his wrists, a vibroblade to his neck. Kenobi’s lip is bleeding, and Jango thinks he might have caused a hairline fracture in the cheekbone. Both of them have at least one broken rib, and Jango’s currently blind in one eye from the blood pouring out of a cut on his forehead.
Kenobi’s a good fighter. If it weren’t for everything else, Jango might have even been able to appreciate that.
“You,” Kenobi growls, fisting one hand into Jango’s curls and yanking for emphasis, earning himself a snarl in return. “Are going to fix this mess you’ve helped create. If I have to drag the entire Jedi council, the entire senate, if I have to drag in all of Mandalore to make you fix this, I will.”
There’s determination in those words, angry and a little spiteful, but mostly just... disappointed.
“Of course I’m disappointed,” Kenobi spits out, like the words are hot coals. He’s expressive. Jango wants to like it, but mostly he just resents the trait. “I hoped to never find a soulmate; it just complicates things. Opsec becomes a nightmare and holding to the code is difficult. And now I have a soulmate, and he’s an absolute monster that views his own children as little more than droids.”
“War is going to come for them no matter what,” Jango manages to say, and Kenobi’s look is back to unimpressed. “Don’t pretend you haven’t heard of the separatists. There’s an army of actual droids, metal and code, just waiting for the right moment to pick a fight. It’s too late to stop it.”
“...you’re not only raising an army of your own children, but engineering the war that’s going to kill them?” Kenobi almost screeches, and the wave of nauseous loathing that slams into Jango is almost enough to make him actually vomit. Kenobi didn’t pull punches, not in the actual fight and not in whatever mental battle they’re apparently having via emotions and words.
“I’m not engineering it,” Jango says. “I’m just one part in a bigger machine. I got my payment. The rest is on Tyranus.”
He doesn’t even stop the images from flickering through his mind, throwing the man who hired him under the speeder.
“Master Dooku?” Kenobi whispers, horror growing. “No, no, I killed the--the Sith can’t--I killed the one on Naboo, and the Council mentioned the Rule of Two, but... oh hells.”
“You know him?” Jango taunts.
“He’s my grandmaster,” Kenobi says, and Jango can’t imagine the rest is meant to reach him, but the undercurrent is there.
Count Dooku is, by Mandalorian law, Kenobi’s grandfather.
Jango... suddenly feels a little regret about the taunting.
“I’d rather you feel regret about your children,” Kenobi snaps at him. “Every single one of them is a person, one that you chose to bring into this world, and they are your children.”
The argument is going in circles, but there are still places to take this.
“Your army is all adults, Kenobi,” Jango decides.
“They are ten years old,” Kenobi retorts. “Accelerated aging, sure, but they are children.”
“They’re soldiers.”
Disgust again, the same thing Kenobi has felt every time Jango has reasserted the purpose these children were born to, the same thing Jango has told his son, his sergeants, himself, for over a decade.
“A son?” Kenobi whispers. “Is your denial that strong, Fett? That you would claim one and not the rest?”
“Payment,” Jango says, and lets Kenobi feel the rest, since he seems so karking keen on it.
“Keeping one child in exchange for letting yourself be the creator of a slave army,” Kenobi says, and he doesn’t seem impressed. “Weren’t you a slave? Two years on a spice ship, wasn’t it?”
“Don’t you dare--”
“And you would put your sons in chains,” Kenobi hisses, hands going for Jango’s head again. It’s a sense memory, this time, of dark tunnels and exploding collars and a dar’jetii that... was his older brother. According to the Jedi way of thinking.
It’s a twisting fear and pain and I will die so that others may live while looking at an older man, a Master, who can maybe save the other slaves at the expense of one too-angry Initiate’s li--
“Get out of my head!” Jango roars, and he still can’t move his arms, and his legs are held down by the Force, but he twists his head to bite and Kenobi snatches his hands away.
Kenobi glares down at him, almost sneering with the amount of disdain he has for Jango’s general existence. “I’m your soulmate, and had we met fifteen years ago, I might have even thought that an alright thing... but whatever you are now isn’t something I can abide by. You won’t listen to morality, so let me say this instead: a Jedi does not kill an unarmed opponent, but I have full authority to arrest you, even here. I will take you back to the Republic, to be tried for your collusion with a Sith, and you will go to prison. You can try to run, but I am in your head, and you’re in mine. Once you’re in prison, what happens to your son?”
The implication is there, but even if it wasn’t, Jango hears the thought:
They’re soulmates. The Republic would place Boba with Kenobi.
He refuses to have his child raised by a holier-than-thou Jedi.
“Holiness doesn’t have any meaning in Jedi philosophy,” Kenobi says, relaxing just the slightest bit. “Other religions, yes, but no place in ours.”
“You’re a self-righteous bastard,” Jango says flatly. “Despite threatening a child.”
“You mean threatening to take custody of a child being raised in an unhealthy environment, one where he’s being taught to devalue his brothers, engendering a mental dissonance where he has to convince himself he’s special for a reason and that you won’t just drop him if he fails to be perfect?” Kenobi asks. “I prefer to keep children with guardians who love them, but the argument that he’s better off away from you isn’t a difficult one.”
“Oh, like a child-stealer--”
“My mother tried to drown me when I was a toddler,” Kenobi says, even flatter than Jango had been a minute earlier. “Because I was Force-Sensitive, and it was considered curse on my home planet. A Jedi saved me. Tell me that was a kidnapping and not being saved.”
Jango grinds his teeth. “You’re damned smug whenever you have some sob story that outranks mine.”
“This isn’t about who has the bigger sob story,” Kenobi says, and Jango can feel how he’s just as ready to start clenching his jaw to deal with Jango’s bullshit. “It’s about you doing your damned job as a Mandalorian and a father, and taking responsibility for your children. All three million of them.”
It really, really is a pity they didn’t meet before Jango took this job. They could have been great together.
As it is, Jango goes for the groin shot the second Kenobi lets him back on his feet.
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stardustprompts · 3 years
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what we do in the shadows  --  season 3 sentence starters  part 1 change tenses/pronouns as needed !!  some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying tw :   nsfw , language , death , sexism
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‘still, he should not have done so much slaughtering.’
‘well, I guess I should just shut the fuck up then.’ 
‘thank you for saving us, but sorry, you’re our mortal enemy-- you’ve got to die, babes.’ 
‘but how do you know he is not going to kill us? it is in his bloods.’
‘perhaps he is warning us of an imminent danger.’ 
‘now remember, do not look him directly in the eyes. we still do not know the depths of his power.’ 
‘so has there been any updates on my fate?’
‘I’m not trying to kill anyone either, except for you!’
‘you may speak but, remember, no bullshit from thy mouth.’ 
‘I love thrones! they’re my favorite chair.’ 
‘I became a vampire to suck blood and to fuck forever.’
‘you were shitting yourself for a moment there, weren’t you?’
‘is your brain fully operational?’ 
‘ (name) and I have agreed to work together as a team.’ 
‘ for now, I’m letting (name) think that we are ‘sharing power’.’
‘don’t monkey about with that!’ 
‘I’d go myself, but I can’t be fucked.’ 
‘these buns will be waiting for you.’ 
‘I am prepared to escalate matters to crazy levels!’
‘she’s angry, as women so often are.’ 
‘well, you started by calling me dipshit.’ 
‘you, my darling, have the high firm ass of an irish derby winner.’
‘it could be that he has feelings for you, too.’ 
‘you seem really into him.’
‘you have turned into a very very soft boy!’
‘me, personally, I don’t give a shit where he goes.’ 
‘the cat’s out the bag! your boy’s in love!’ 
‘I have no issue with (name).’
‘between you and me, I wouldn’t normally spend this much time with him.’ 
‘I figure the quicker he gets on with it, the quicker he’ll shut his mouth.’ 
‘agree with what? I didn’t say anything.’ 
‘I don’t really remember my mom anymore.’ 
‘we can have a girlie to girlie conversation.’ 
‘being a werewolf is not a crime!’
‘the only crime that my (name) is guilty of is stealing. stealing my heart.’ 
‘okay now look, we’re not here to cause trouble, we’re just here to, you know, be nice. and nonconfrontational.’ 
‘not only am I his bodyguard, I am also his heart guard.’ 
‘I always knew we couldn’t trust your kind!’ 
‘attention! the party bus will be leaving in a moment.’ 
‘no, I was just being polite. it’s obviously very shitty.’ 
‘holy shit! it’s just like ocean’s eleven!’
‘I mean, at every office I’ve worked at, they always say ‘we’re a big family here’. and it does motivate people to work harder and neglect their actual families and put up with all sorts of degrading shit.’ 
‘have you got a little secret, you little sick fuck?’ 
‘do you know what the most beautiful thing in the world is? fucking.’ 
‘you know how it is when you have the binge - watch blinders on. I got caught up in a show that i’m obsessed with.’ 
‘I can feel my powers fading!’
‘I need to borrow your credit card and not tell you why.’ 
‘fucking knicks. they’ll break your heart every time. but I can’t quit ‘em.’ 
‘listen, I trust you. you’re my main man, I’d die for you.’ 
‘I need to sort this, and I need to sort it now.’ 
‘and in a single instant, my world was turned upside down.’ 
‘this is science.’ 
‘I am all alone, floating through the cold, dark universe like a little grain of furry sand.’
‘I have never felt so small, and what is the point of anything?’ 
‘i’m pretty certain it might be this way.’ 
‘it’ll take awhile to play but I think if we start now we should be done by dawn.’ 
‘i’m in too deep.’ 
‘I could kiss you, (name)!’
‘it’s all a big game of chess. I just didn’t say who was playing whom.’ 
‘okay hear me out, if you tell me the rules, I’d be down to follow them.’ 
‘that was a shit response, wasn’t it?’ 
‘I guess I do fucked-up shit now. that’s just who I am.’ 
‘no one said that. please do not talk anymore.’ 
‘okay, fine, I don’t even care at this point.’ 
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gaecactae · 3 years
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This is going to be a bit of a post, so if you would like to hear me out about Sam, go under the cut! It does contain spoilers from today’s lore.
Let’s talk about Awesamdude today! Since a lot happened in the lore today and Sam showed us the new face of angry Warden, a lot of people are hating his character completely. So yeah it will all be rp focused, not the content creator!! Just so we know.
So shall we begin.
Sam, Awesamdude, is, as a little introduction, one of the first, original DSMP members that joined ever. He’s very good with redstone, having his secret base in BadLands, far away from the SMP terrains. The whole place was first protected by complicated mechanisms, now it’s no longer too secret.
Sam was known as one of those more responsible adults on the server, the one that protects, the one that cares more about the younger members, etc.
We’re going to focus on the prison situation mostly, okay?
Sam picked up his duty as a Warden, since he was the one that built it, easy as that. As a reminder, the Prison was built as a commission, coming from Dream.
Lore wise, we know Sam is technically always in the Prison, always making sure Dream is stuck inside, this is his duty. He said this couple of times, that he WILL care more about keeping Dream locked up, than saving individuals in extreme situations. There are rules in the prison that he swore to go by. EVERYONE comes under them, as they sign the book.
I mean… look at him. He is there for the whole time, on his own, lore wise we know he hears the Guardian noises for the whole time, maybe he hears Dream’s distant maniacal laughter somewhere in the back; I mean come on. The Prison is such a hollow place and he’s there for the whole time basically. How can you not be tired of it?
What about the guards he hired? No one is ever here to back him up, I saw them in action once and if I remember well - it was when Tubbo built dicks on the top of the prison’s roof and they were intervening.
It’s just… I dunno, but if we are all so eager to embrace and take personally Tommy’s lore and Ranboo’s lore and live with it - why don’t we do that will everyone? I think Sam completely deserved to have his lore taken seriously and good look at.
He is not only the prison worker that allows people to die inside. Sam is responsible for keeping Dream locked up, he is not responsible for what Dream does. Furthermore - every single person that walks into the prison KNOWS what Dream can do, THEY are making the decision to go inside. No one is pushing them to do that.
It’s also not that he will wash his hands off what happened. He was petrified when Tommy was murdered inside the prison but what could he do? Sam is trying hard, and he’s not perfect, he makes a lot of mistakes and it shows. But he’s certainly doing more well thought things and is being more reasonable about the whole Dream situation, then anyone else.
Again looking lorewise, he is tired. People are constantly fucking with him, I mean this constant messing around the prison which he treats very seriously, messing with him as a Warden. Time for Ponk’s situation.
For those who don’t know - Ponk once stole Sam’s access keys to the prison that apparently weren’t working anymore cause he changed them out at some point. He found them in some chest by his house, there were 11 of them.
If you know me, you will know I absolutely love Ponk. I love to listen to him and to watch him, it’s entertaining. But I knew that by taking the keycards, he is doing exactly what Tubbo was doing by building penises on the roof - messing with the prison, interrupting Sam’s duties.
Cutting off his hand was definitely not the way to go, Sam messed up with how brutal he appeared. Though I can see why he was acting this way.
Prison is his job, he is taking it as serious as he can. It has its rules, once again, and you know what? Everyone come under those rules, even Sam’s beloved one, like Ponk! He can’t make exceptions.
Thus I was so surprised by Sam’s deeds today. Sam had 100% right to kill Tommy instantly for sneaking inside like this. Of course Tommy didn’t want to break Dream out - but how can Sam know? Sam doesn’t know his real intentions, you think he will listen to Tommy say he wanted to break in and kill Dream, he will be like “oh yeah ok sure well here’s all my set go on”?
Sam doesn’t trust Tommy, but oh well, Tommy doesn’t trust Sam anymore as well.
I won’t ever agree with people that say that what happened today wasn’t Tommy’s fault. It was, is and will be Tommy’s fault. Seriously, don’t glorify Tommy for being Tommy and being a minor. It’s… to say at least, a weird reasoning.
Look. I understand we’re all protecting Tommy and Tubbo and Ranboo, because they are younger, they were put through a lot - but as you can see, they can sort it out on themselves! Tommy was fighting his traumas just the other day, it obviously doesn’t mean he’s completely fine, but he seriously doesn’t need to be protected, or glorified all the way. It’s tiring seeing people constantly blame every single incident on anyone around, but Tommy. That’s seriously… it’s not how it works yall.
On the same time, obviously - it was Dream’s responsibility for killing Ghostbur, who was the most damaged in the whole situation today. I mean, man’s in afterlife now damn
But back to Sam - I’m completely convinced he’s not the one to blame. At least not for everything but there is something that’s called “a talk” that could have happened between Tommy and Sam, about the prison and keeping Dream like this and maybe considering ending this all. It could have happened completely different way, and it was very disappointing to see Tommy’s character that was already so nicely improving, to flop back down and hear him just spit “fuck you’s” at Sam, victimising himself in the whole thing.
I don’t plan on changing my mind on this, if you’re wondering.
And I bet there’s plenty of stuff I forgot that I wanted to mention, so if I remind myself about them - they will probably be added in the comments
Thank you for reading! I hope English isn’t scuffed too much, my thoughts were flying a bit, because it’s 4:30am as I write this so yea heuh
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blzzrdstryr · 3 years
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Hello ! May I request a yan scaramouche x fatui harbinger reader? This is my first time sending a request, so I'm not sure what else to add..
I thought about answering this with headcanons only, but I like your idea enough, so my brain blurted out a small drabble to accompany them.
Yandere!Scaramouche x fatui harbinger!gn!reader
Scaramouche isn’t a type of person that is easy to please, as he can find fault in almost anything or anyone within a couple of minutes, a contemptuous scowl taking it’s usual place on his face. He dislikes his subordinates - they are stupid and slow and never get his orders right, despite how simple his commands are. He loathes ordinary people - they idle around and get in the way of his business. And, of course, he despises his colleagues - they're crazy and annoying bunch, starting from the battle obsessed ginger idiot and ending with just straight up insane scientist who likes to play god on other fatui underlings.
Not counting you, of course.
You see, there is always some exception from the rule, divergence from the median, unnatural anomaly, you.
It was hard at first, to comprehend that he actually liked you. He felt this weird warmth blooming in his chest as he looked at you, cheeks furiously heating up, and his eyes were searching for your face, and especially your lips, every time you had a meeting together. Every single time.
All it took for him to finally realize his feelings for you was some half serious comment from Childe, the moron joked that Scaramouche looked like a longing maiden, at which the shorter man snapped back with a couple of barbed insults that no doubt hurt Tartaglia’s ego.
Despite understanding his sentiments now, it didn’t make life easier in the slightest sense. On the contrary, Scaramouche was now aware how much in love he was with you - he was annoyed with himself for the first three weeks - and how much power you had over him.
It is frightening to know that he allowed himself to be ruled by his feelings alone like some foolish teen having a first crush. You reduced a great Harbinger to some love obsessed idiot. Scaramouche started to catch himself how hard it is to just stop staring at your form, devouring your face, legs and form with eyes alone, or how angry he gets once anyone other than him talks to you, be it other Harbingers, your underlings or even Tsaritsa herself.
Sometimes a desperate thought makes its way into his mind - to lock you up and hide from the whole world, to be the only person to touch, smell, taste and see you, to be the only one blessed to witness your beauty and hear your voice. Silly notion reappears in his head with a concerning frequency, and he sometimes even entertains it, consumed by his imagination for a far longer time that is healthy
Nonetheless, Scaramouche always has to discard the idea - it is a mad, perverse and unobtainable image - no matter how much he lusts after you and pictures you all good and docile just for him, you are still a Harbinger, his equal in everything, including the power. If only you were some underling or even civilian, then he wouldn’t need to feign indifference in your presence, or stop some of his less than pleasant urges. He could just snatch you and chain you, train to be a good little toy just for him, happy to serve it’s master and owner.
Oh how sweet you would moan and beg under him, how much you would do to please him. Scaramouche could break you and rebuild from scratch, make sure that there is nothing but him in your pretty head, match his obsession with you with a love he would force you to learn. He could be your god and the world, replace everything in your life with his presence alone. Sadly, there’s no way Scaramouche can get away with this when you are his equal.
Fortunately for him, there are ways fatuis even as high and mighty as Harbingers can still lose their title. The easiest one is to disappoint Tsaritsa - fail enough tasks, mess up significant missions or cause an international conflict, you pick it.
It’s a traitorous and dangerous thought - sabotage of the fellow harbinger, something that would prompt his own demotion or even dismissal if someone got wind of what he plans. But, Scaramouche muses, it’s also a game worth playing - he can lose everything if he fails, but he’ll get you if he wins. He just needs to trick you to ruin your reputation and attract the ire of the cryo archon.
“Hello”, he says, approaching you after the usual harbinger gathering, a fake smile plastered on his face: “I want to help you with that mission Tsaritsa gave you”.
You look at him with an unreadable gaze, brows furrowed in contemplation: “Why would you offer your help?”
“I don’t want Tsaritsa or Fatui to be at a disadvantage, this task is really hard. I am not questioning Tsaritsa’s judgement, but Qixing started to be really suspicious of us, especially after that idiot, Tartaglia, almost drowned the whole city”. He tries to keep his usual slightly annoyed, slightly angered manner of talking, hoping that you won’t question him.
It works - “All right”, you nod offering an intel spies have collected, and start introducing him to what you plan to do. He intently listens, feeling how his fake smile grows into a genuine one.
Headcanons
Scaramouche is smitten - his eyes trail you, he takes your every word like a holy scripture, he gets so flustered when you just look his way, yet he never shows it to you, a bored facade appearing every time you pay him even a gram of attention.
You, most likely, won't even be aware of his crush growing into obsession - Scaramouche is a skilled actor, capable of showing thousands of different emotions seconds, effortlessly switching between the masks.
Despite the gentle feelings he has fpr, Scaramouche also possesses much darker urges that he doesn't want to stop.
He is very possessive, getting angry every time you talk with anyone other than him.
He likes to picture you obedient and docile, worshipping him like a God. He thinks he deserves it.
The balance in the power between you two is something that really bothers him - he wants you to be completely dependent on him, vulnerable before any wish and perversion he could subject you to.
Will try to sabotage you as a harbinger in hopes that you lose your title and power.
If you somehow remain infallible to his schemes and plans he will try to actually befriend you.
It's an arduous task, none of the harbingers really like each other enough to build such intimate connections, and both you and Scaramouche know it.
If you have a lesser rank than him, he will try to come off as a well meaning senior. If he is the one with a lesser title, then he will feign ignorance and ask for assistance.
All in all, your fate depends on how smart and cautious you are around Scaramouche. If you are perceptive enough he will have to face one defeat after the other, lessenning his resolve.
Don't think that it will be enough to stop him from trying, though.
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noaltbruh · 3 years
Note
I hope this follows the rules! But is it okay if I request a scenario where Giorno has a nightmare of turning into Diavolo and S/O comforts him when he wakes up?
My first request in so long, what an honor!
You're surely a fan of this scenario, I've seen you requesting it quite a lot of times.
Either way, let's get into it!
Esci dalla mia testa
06/04/2004
Midnight had just struck, it had already been three years.
Three years since Giovanna had become the new Don of Passione, and since the former had been punished for his actions.
But in reality, time had lost meaning to the young boy years ago. Everything he did, it felt so...Mechanic, so frivolous, simply keeping track of the days in order not to forget an important reunion.
He buried himself under thousands of piles of work, which only seemed to grow bigger and bigger with every day that passed. This was supposed to be his dream, his greatest goal, and he had reached it at such a young age.
But then...Why did he feel so empty?
He was supposed to be happy, after all the sacrifices that had been made to arrive so far, he had to be grateful for everything that's been given to him.
But he couldn't be, because those sacrifices were not his own, because innocent lives had been taken away, because he had come.
He truly was no different than the man whom he had condemned to suffer for all eternity. But he had to clinch his teeth, and keep on going with his head high, for the few people that were still by his side. Most importantly, for his partner.
As everyone around him had found a significant other, pressured by his best friend, he had decided to reluctantly indulge in this so called 'romance'.
And when you two finally met, he felt like a tiny fickle of faith had risen inside of his heart again.
You listened to him, to his struggles, to his doubts, to each one of his complaints like the were the only worries in the world. He failed to express how much you meant to him, after those...'Accidents', he had become even more close-up about his feelings.
You were very well aware of his workaholic tendencies, as most nights, you were the one to ask him to put down all the documents and get some rest
And this...Was one of those.
As you rapidly fell into a deep sleep, exhausted from your own day, you felt a soft hand gently caressing your forehead. You were so warm and comforting, like a puppy, the only one able to give him hope in this twisted world.
But sadly, your presence could not magically make all his guilt and insecurities go away, and he had accepted that.
After contemplating your dreaming figure for a minute, he slowly closed his eyes, wishing to escape, just for a short while, from all those crushing responsibilities and expectations.
His consciousness started to slip away, he felt ready to conclude another day. Until, he heard whispering. Weak, confused, peculiar sounds, he could not understand a word of what those voices were trying to tell him, they were too far from the boy.
But they wouldn't stop. Delicate, constant and unbearable like the sound of a drip of water falling into a sink. They were playing with the Don's patience, a sleeping lion that should not disturbed, unless you wanted to be torn to pieces.
His mind immediately connected the situation to a possible Stand attack, nothing out of his normality, per se, but he was not concerned for himself. You were still peacefully resting, clinging to your sheets, it was a quite cold night. He wouldn't have let a single soul cause any harm to his darling, she was his only true happiness, his sunshine.
In the moment he stepped outside of the bedroom, what he was faced with sent a frozen shiver down his spine, as he brought his hand to his chest, to control his heartbeat.
There were four doors, floating in absolute darkness. A weak stream of light, that seemed to be originated from nothingness, illuminated each one of them singularly.
The whispering got louder and louder, faint giggles could occasionally be heard. The young one turned around to look at the entrance of this cursed place, the one he had just walked through.
But there was nothing there.
And so, like a captured prey that had nothing left to lose, he ventured himself into the first door, only to be met with a monochromatic version of Fugo. He was breathing heavily, desperately sobbing and all curled up on himself, on the shore of the same place where the rest of the gang had decided to betray Passione.
Giorno was standing on top of the water, unable to move a single inch of his body.
"Look at what you did"
A deep voice murmured in his ear. One he hadn't heard in a long time, one he wished he could have erased from his memories, that infected his mind and was more deadly than the sobbing boy's stand.
Diavolo.
"Me? Fugo chose not to leave, it was his own fault if-"
"If he was abandoned by everyone he loved? Do you have any idea of how selfish it sounds?"
The boy hesitated for a brief moment, staring at those warm tears falling into the canal.
"It was just...A temporary matter, he rejoined Passione, he's doing better now"
"My, it must have surely been fun to prove your loyalty to someone who caused the death of half of the people you cared about, after refusing to participate in his little suicide mission"
The blond's legs started to tremble, mantainig his composure was starting to look impossible.
"They...They didn't die because of me, they sacrificed themselves for a noble cause, for making Italy a better place, they wished it as much as I did"
The man contained his laughter, then he continued.
"Is that so? Why don't say that in their faces then?"
The image of the lonely boy disappeared, together with everything in the room. Giorno was back to that black space, but the door was now missing.
And the next one...Had nothing better reserved for him.
He found himself in the island of Sardegna, the only sound that could be heard were the small waves that met with the coast.
He knew perfectly why he was here. He took a closer look at the seaside, there were some footsteps printed on it. He felt a knot in his stomach at the thought of where they would have brought him.
Abbacchio's lifeless body was laying on top of a rock, surrounded by dead flowers. His entire torso had been torn apart, and yet... His corpse was smiling. A tiny, melancholic smile on his purple lips.
"Do you still have the courage to repeat what you said?"
Diavolo began, in a mocking tone.
"When he became part of the Organization, he was at his lowest, he had nowhere else to go, every path he took brought him nothing but sorrow and disappointment. The only thing that gave him comfort was following Bucciarati...And so, with that excuse, I transformed him in one of minions"
The thought of calling out Gold Experience hit Giorno's mind, but he knew that there was no point of lying to himself. The albino was gone, his soul had left his body long ago.
"I don't need you to tell me just how disgusting you are"
He said, his voice was filled with a suffocated rage, as he knelt over to look closer at his former companion.
"Abbacchio couldn't have cared less about killing me, he came with you because Bucciarati did, because he so desperately wanted to follow him, he felt like scum at the thought of no longer having him in his life"
The boy with emerald eyes felt an hand touching him on his shoulder, but there was no one there, except for himself.
"You exploited his dependence from the man, and used at your advantage, just as I did"
He stopped for a brief moment, enjoying the desperation in the other's eyes.
"But at least, he didn't die under my guidance
And with that, the second room disappeared as well. The boy contemplated whether to remain in that hellish void or to move forward, the image of what was waiting on the other side hurt way too much, his juvenile soul was starting to crush.
But he couldn't remain there, it would have meant giving up to Diavolo's twisted games, seeing him break down was exactly what he was waiting for.
He turned the doorknob, when he felt something humid staining his clothes: there was fresh blood streaming from his lady bug pins. The trail that it formed on the ground invited him to follow its path. He knew he couldn't decline, none of what he wanted seemed to matter in this place.
A metallic railing stood in front of him, his entire pins bled so much to the point of consuming themselves. An horrific scream coming from nowhere and everywhere at the same time echoed through the room, as he directed his gaze to the top of the grey construction.
"What a shame...Oh well, he was the most disposable member of the team anyway"
Narancia's corpse was resting among dozens of spikes, his faded orange bandage slipped from his dark hair, landing right next to Giorno's feet.
"Oh Narancia...So young, so naive, just another victim of this unfair world. That's what you're thinking, isn't that right, Giovanna?"
"This is why people like him should not be involved in this business..."
"Mh? And why is that? Childish minds are the easiest to manipulate"
Ignoring his last statement, the other leaned down to pick up the bandage, but his hand went through it. His body was starting to feel dizzy, like it belonged to somebody else.
"Not answering won't make me go away, the damage has already been done, after all"
"Narancia should have NEVER joined Passione in the first place. He could have gone to school...Have a normal life, but-"
"But he died for your cause before he could. What he said before I activated King Crimson melted my heart a little, how cute...He really trusted you that much to the point of thinking that he would have come out of it alive"
The railing emanated a cracking sound. For a second, he was afraid it would have fallen off, causing him to get impaled as well.
"I took away his chance of living an happy, standard life when he decided to work for me, and you did the same, allowing him to come along with the rest of your team"
The small boy suddenly faded away, together with the rest.
"But at least, he didn't die under my guidance"
At last, there it was: only one room left. Despite how deeply he cared about each one of his former team members, the premonition of what would have come next was more painful than everything he's seen so far altogether.
He sat down, staring at the door from a distance, his eyes emptier than the ones of his old allies. They say that eyes are the window of the soul, and nothing else could have been used to describe his inner turmoil. Nothing but a faded, dull green, testimony of all his battle scars and the survivor guilt that he tried so much to repress.
Perhaps his eternal punishment had arrived: having the chance to confront his inner demons, to move on, to show how fearless he was.
...But never truly grasping the idea of freedom, never facing and accepting what really happened, he was never given the time to. So much had oppressed him all at once, he couldn't keep up with it.
He was a child, a child that had to grow too fast.
But then, someone came out of the door. A bittersweet figment of his imagination, that made his heart stop beating for a second.
The one he hadn't seen in years, the one he had tried to subdue the most, the one that showed him for the first time in his life what love was, stood in front of him. There was no hole in his chest, no sign of blood or wounds, a reassuring smile accompanied his face, as he held out his hand to the grieving kid.
"What are you doing all alone in here? The others are worried for you. Let's not make them wait any longer, shall we?"
Giorno ignored his help, his gaze was stuck on that endless floor. He didn't have the courage to look at the other, his presence alone felt like a sadistic joke.
He didn't look sad, depressed, miserable... He was just...Tired.
He wanted to cry those tears that he had denied in the last three years, he wanted to yell at that illusion to leave him alone, that wasn't the real Bruno, it couldn't be.
But, as he impeded any of this from coming out, something he didn't think he would have felt in a thousand of years struck him.
Bucciarati hugged him.
A tight, comforting hug like one of a mother, that he was waiting for his child to reciprocate. The latter's breathing became heavier and heavier with every moment that passed, as weak laments rapidly turned into audible sobs.
"There's no reason to be sad now, I'm real, you can feel it, can't you?"
"Y-You...You're here...But h-how is it p-possible?"
The brunette chuckled, the sound of his laughter was more comforting than an angel's voice.
"It isn't"
Giovanna's stand penetrated the man's torso, but its arm...It was not Gold Experience's. It had a checkered red and white pattern that extended in its entirety, and it possessed an amount of physical strength which was out of any possible expectations for the creature able to give life.
"Foolish child, I thought you were better than this, I'd lie if I said I wasn't a bit disappointed"
The sound of Bruno's corpse falling to the ground resonated through that empty space, as the last door vanished. A puddle of blood originated from his horrible injury, it was big enough for the boy to see his reflection in.
"You are no better than me under any point of view. We took advantage of his kindness, we used him as a simple pawn for our own gain. The only difference between us, is that I was not manipulating enough to convince him to join my side voluntarily. He was a tool to the both of us, but you were the one who caused his demise"
The mirror that had been created showed two people, but the transparent figure of Diavolo immediately ceased to be visible. The only one left was Giorno, though his reflection seemed to mutate with every second that passed.
His blond curls started to change shape, turning into a fuchsia mess, with dirty green stains on it. His eyes had a killer, maniacal look inside of them, his pupils got smaller in horror. His entire body structure was different. He looked older, more muscular, his clothes, too, were no longer his own.
"Mista loved him, and you killed him"
"Fugo loved him, and you killed him"
"Trish loved him, and you killed him"
"Narancia loved him, and you killed him"
"Abbacchio loved him, and you killed him"
"You loved him, and you killed him"
...
"Giorno? Giorno please, wake up!"
You screamed, your sleep was interrupted by the sound of your boyfriend hyperventilating, as he desperately held you to himself, still trapped in that horrible dream.
You sighed in relief when he abruptly opened his eyes, so swollen and red from all the tears he's shed.
"Another nightmare, uh?"
You asked, gently caressing his back to try and calm him down, he was as vulnerable as a baby that runs to his parents after having a bad dream. Waking up in the middle of the night to comfort him is something you had grown accustomed to, but you had never seen him this shaken up.
He slightly nodded in response, grabbing the top of your pajamas. You put an hand behind his head, making him rest on your chest, and kissed him softly on his forehead.
You could hear him murmuring something, you couldn't tell wherever he was talking to you, or to himself.
"I-I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm s-so sorry..."
He repeated like a broken record, you could barely make out what he was trying to say.
"Tesoro, you've done nothing wrong, there's no one you owe your apologizes to"
The boy raised his head slightly, intertwining your fingers with his, he needed to feel sure that this was not another tremendous trick of his mind.
"See? I'm here, you don't have to be afraid. I know that you feel unworthy of my feelings, but there is no one out there that deserves love more than you do. Nobody is perfect, Giorno, you did everything that was in your power to help them"
"But I...I was the one w-who put them in danger in the first place"
"No, you were not. You all shared the same ideals, you saved them from the oppression they were put in"
As you swept those remaining drops away from his face, you could still feel his entire body shaking like a dried leaf in a windy day of autumn.
"N-None of this would have happened if I didn't come along..."
"Exactly, none of them would have known what it meant to be free. I...Understand that the sacrifices that were made are not easy to forget, but blaming yourself like this...Do you really think that's what they would have wanted?"
Not receiving an answer, you laid down once again, still holding him in your arms. You forced a tiny smile, kissing him delicately on his lips, and whispered in his ear that everything would have been okay.
But, in reality...You felt you were trying to reassure yourself as well. This was not something you could have solely resolved through staying by his side, healing from this would have taken a lot of time, but...At least, you could offer some temporary safety, and it seemed to be enough for the time being.
In fact, after some minutes, everything seemed to cease. The boy fell asleep once again, this time with the knowledge that you were there to protect him.
You sighed, praying for your darling to finally find some peace.
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fallinfl0wers · 3 years
Text
love stories with some genshin boys i thought of while listening to my playlists
includes: aether (210 words), xiao (261 words), scaramouche (277 words) and albedo (307)
warnings (?): spoilers of ‘we will be reunited’, english is not my native language and uhh idk what else, idk really know what these are, headcanons ?? snippets ?? also not beta read and not edited.
it’s long so uhhh i’ll add a cut somewhere
anyway enjoy!! ...whatever this is i guess
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Aether
Falling in love with Aether is like a fun adventure. He, being always the center of attention and the protagonist no matter where he goes, is a free spirited, kind and hardworking man. 
Throughout your time travelling and being in a relationship together, you’ll find that your relationship with the Honorary Knight is one of sweet kisses under the sunlight; innocent handholding while thinking up of what to make for dinner tonight; of easily talked out arguments and finding ways to compromise; of softly pushing each other to become a better version of themselves and, most of all, of supporting and having each other’s backs no matter what.
And when Aether confronts the Abyss Princess face to face for the first time and his world comes crashing down on him, this trait of your relationship shines like no other, as you hold him in your arms after everything was over during the night, Paimon sleeping soundly next to the both of you inside your improvised campsite.
“Even though I’m not sure what -or who- I should believe anymore, I... I know I want to see this journey to the end, and I want you to be there with me for it. Let’s be together until the last moment and beyond.”
Songs:
Snow Fairy - Funkist
Snowing, be honest with yourself and smile When two people are getting closer, time overlaps Fairy, where are you going I will gather all the light and shine it on your tomorrow
Still Lonely - SEVENTEEN
This cursed popularity. Why won’t it leave me? But why am I getting lonelier The early morning chill makes me feel Even lonelier today I feel completely empty, as if I’m empty
Kanpeki Gu~ no ne - Watarirouka Hashiritai
I'm at a loss for words, with this and that, I'm totally in love with you Someday, I want do the same to you: Watch you flounder, At a loss for words right back to me!
Side by Side - The8 from SEVENTEEN
I want to hold hands with you but I don't know what to do what to do oh baby I want to give all my heart to you but You still don't know what's in my heart
Hope - Namie Amuro
At the end of this blue, wide world there's a place I want to aim at with you We chose this long ago for eternity
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Xiao
Falling in love with Xiao is like living a bittersweet dream. The Vigilant Yaksha is far from human, or so he says, and thus is out of touch with the way we mortals experience feelings, both the negative and positive ones.
Your relationship with him is one of compassion, mutual understanding, appreciation and patience. So, so much patience. Of intertwined pinkies and soft stolen glances, of shy smiles and comfortable silence sometimes filled with your voice chatting time away and his short responses to your talks.
I mentioned patience. He knows you’re making an enormous effort to try and understand him and be patient with him and his slow learning process of how relationships work, so it’s only fair that he makes a true effort to understand you and your feelings.
Xiao is well aware that he could hurt you without wanting to, be it with his blunt phrasing of his thoughts or his Karmic Debt, as much as he is aware that you will eventually pass away and leave him behind to go somewhere he can’t follow, and that undeniable truth haunts him every second of every day he gets to spend with you. And still, he wishes and wants and does cherish each and every warm, kind feeling he gets every single second you’re together nonetheless.
“I might not know what to make of these new feelings you gave me. But I’ll learn. I promise I’ll learn, so please... don’t go, not yet. Let me treasure you and carve you into my memory for as long as I can.”
Songs:
Euphoria - BTS
I don't know what this emotion is Perhaps this is also the inside of a dream A dream is the blue mirage of the desert Deep inside of me, a priori I become happy to the point of being unable to breathe The surroundings, bit by bit, become clearer
Fallin’ Flower - SEVENTEEN
While flower blooms and falls, scars cure and buds shoot We are living our first and last moment So I won’t take you for granted Because you loved me as I am
Fear - SEVENTEEN
Get out my mind I can't handle it, I'm afraid of myself The truth has me tied up My heart is tainted I'm afraid it'll eventually change you too
The Truth Untold - BTS, Steve Aoki
It’s my fate Don’t smile to me Light on me Because I can’t get closer to you There’s no name you can call me
You know that I can’t Show you me Give you me I can’t show you a ruined part of myself Once again I put a mask on and go to see you But I still want you
Tiny Light - Akari Kitō
Because you colored my unchanging monochromatic days Even the blurred darkness gained meaning
Still, hidden in this heart, these feelings of preciousness so strong that they hurt I just want to convey these feelings to only you before they disappear someday
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Scaramouche
Falling in love with Scaramouche is like constantly playing a game. He’s strict, demanding, disagreeable, and widely disliked by enemies and allies alike. Still, he has a heart too; and he holds desires and hopes deep inside of it, although most of them are fueled by the unchanging curiosity he has towards the world around him, curiosity to know what he can get out of whatever the world wants to throw at him.
You were no exception to that rule, at first.
When he met you he wanted to get something from you. And you knew it from the start, just as he knew that you knew. And that didn’t change anything, at first.
Your relationship with him is one of dangerously playful, yet still light-hearted games of seduction, teasing and deceit; of secret kisses exchanged in expensive private rooms in restaurants or the cozy warmth of your home, of an unspoken shared respect and, most of all, complete, mutual devotion.
You know Scaramouche is not a good man. He has done many, many unspeakable things in his life as one of the Eleven, and he knows he’s far from being the perfect charming prince you could aim for, but he will never let you go. Because behind those hardened walls of egocentrism and pride, you saw what no one else bothered to see. You saw him, not the role he was playing, you saw him and fell in love with him.
“To be honest, I don’t think I could find anyone else who understands me as much as you do. And no, I’m not saying this because I want something, give me some more credit, geez...”
Songs:
soldier game -  µ’s
You'll come with me, yes? You've grown curious about my touch, yes? Then it's already love Since you're someone I must meet in battle someday, That might just be your reason It's soldier game Though we've met again, I'm soldier heart
Kowareyasuki - Guilty Kiss
Just stop it already and show your heart only to me I love your eyes that are about to cry And your defenseless, clumsy way of living too (...) The hesitation you convey makes my chest hurt Some people just don't know what such kindness is But then I discover the truth When we got together, you don't have to endure anymore Right now, show your grief only to me I like that you think too much The complete opposite of me
Shhh - SEVENTEEN
Don't think of all these as your mere illusion They're not lies that follow the moment No one can underestimate it, my feelings are an ignition 'Cause I'm always the same Me and you, we got hurt by the lies that we won't ever work But it's fate
(...)
So I can cover you from danger A consented dedication
(...)
It's as natural as breathing An everlasting dedication
Good to me - SEVENTEEN
Yeah, when you were making that sign in my heart It was a long time since my firewall broke down Pass with the password What in the world do you know about me? Are my deep feelings seen by you?
Hiraishin - Keyakizaka46
(To trust is to be betrayed, to open one’s heart is to get hurt So to avoid being struck by lightning-like sorrow…)
Which side am I picking? Ah, these values are hard to handle That’s why I won’t stop watching over you Positive positive positive You should just be yourself… I can forgive whatever absurdities you pull off I’ll support you without being noticed Even when you get nitpicked I’ll be your companion Let us now promise to live an unremarkable life hereafter What we have here is the lightning rod of love
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Albedo
Falling in love with Albedo is a fairy tale-like experience for both of you. His attention had always been focused on his research, everything else fading into the background save for a few exceptions, until you came around. You, who stole all his attention by just existing. 
As an alchemist, he’s naturally the curious type. He wanted to know what about it had caught his attention, what was so special about you that had him clinging to your every word and movement every time you interacted with him. Still, human relationships are hard for him, and he figured you might go away the second he started to feel burnt out from your interactions. But you didn’t. Instead, you stayed. You stayed and took interest on what he did, asked questions, gave your insight, and dragged him to sleep when he needed a break. In exchange, he did the same for you.
Your relationship with Albedo is like one of those awkwardly sweet first time crushes. Of carefully calculated movements, dates and compliments, of soft kisses on lips, hands and cheeks, of mutual support, understanding and mature compromising and commitment.
The Kreideprinz, like everyone else, has his own fears and insecurities, especially regarding his... nature, but he does his best not to let them affect the relationship he has with you. Each moment spent by your side, even when he’s not actively doing any research, is considered perfectly spent, meaningful time.
“A long time ago, I was tasked with finding out the meaning of this world. Though I have directed my efforts and resources to looking for the answer through alchemy, ever since we met I... think, I’ve found an unexpected conclusion to said issue. While it’s likely that this is not the answer expected from me, I’m positive that, at least personally, I finally have the answer.”
Songs:
Futari Saison - Keyakizaka46
In the wind blowing through the city’s streets, even though I caught whiff of something’s scent, I had no interest in looking back
In a 1m radius around me, I formed an invisible barrier to another world And yet, you took someone like me out of it
What made you do that?
Home - SEVENTEEN
What can I do? Without you I’m just an old robot, my heart stops and it’s always cold What can we do? Without me You’ll struggle just as much, so what can we do?
Baby, I want to cherish our warmth So no one can come between us
Flower - SEVENTEEN
You taught me, you showed me You’re my only reason If you can forever remember me I can get hurt, I can get hurt
My heart that’s engraved with your light Makes me stronger Give me your sharp thorns Cause you’re my flower
Oh my! - SEVENTEEN
Sorry for repeating the same thing But this is all I can try using hard words But my true feeling is this, every everything
(...)
How about you? Is it hard for you to sleep because of me too? If you keep making my heart flutter What do I do?
Naze koi wo shite konakattan darou? - Sakurazaka46
Why hadn't I fallen in love? I've been making fun of it all this time I mean everyone keeps saying 'I love you' just like cats in heat But after falling in love I realized what people live for To meet, to love, to the point of nothing but... I'm not myself, I want to find my true self.
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kashimos-hajime · 4 years
Text
homestretch of the hard times | g.t.
summary: the eve days of your potential death kinda spurns things to move forward: for takemura, it means confessions. for you, it means making exceptions. and drinks. ‘cause takemura’s the pickiest fucking eater you’ve ever met.
WARNINGS: small spoilers for act 1 of cyberpunk 2077 and references to non-spoiler texts between takemura and v, just fluff, small angst, swearing, idk what else is going on so if there are actual spoilers thats completely coincedental ndlnskfsldnf pairing: goro takemura x fem!street-kid!v word count: 2.6k
a/n: so cdpr did us dirty for not allowing us to romance him (to my knowledge) but he has my mind, heart and everything else so :) listened to the bones by maren morris w/ hozier
part of the tales of a two-bit thief series
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It starts with something straight out of a romance movie: A car crash, saving each other’s lives (well, him more than you) and “Wait, V, I need you.”
You don’t know how you got here, to be precise. There were a chain of events, some absolutely stand up fucking moments on your part, and just… fuckery. So much fuckery and life went to shit.
All you know is the ticking time bomb’s only ticking louder and at this point, the only thing that can silence it at all is the man beside you. Not even the meds Misty gave you can help you now. 
You’re sitting in his car because you called him and he had answered and now… now they’re on one of the off ramps looking over Night City like they own the fucking place.
Maybe you did, once. Ha, maybe back when everything seemed more job to job and not life to life. For a moment, maybe you were in the big leagues.
Takemura doesn’t say anything, even though you can tell he wants to. His hair still pulled into that man bun, collared shirt with not a single wrinkle in sight. Weird how he never looks out of place, not really. Not even with the car crash. Shit, he always looked good.
You think you’re actually gonna miss that. That one semblance of someone being put together that gave you the hope that maybe you could stick it too.
You think you’re gonna miss a lot of things about him—from his stupid complaints about the food here, to his stupid random philosophy texts in the day, to the fact that he eats the ramen you buy anyway without complaint, even though it’ll never compare to what he has in Japan.
The thought that counts.
They don’t even have the radio on, just the dim lights of the car, a window rolled down. You don’t smoke but you feel like you should be tapping a cig either way. You haven’t had the time to just fucking breathe—not with Silverhand breathing down your neck, corpo rats swarming you on all sides. 
Everyone wants a piece of you, it feels like. 
You look at Takemura.
Almost everyone.
“Thank you,” you tell him quietly, with difficulty. It’s hard to get through your words without thinking Silverhand’s behind your back, mocking you. You’re so fucking tired. “It hasn’t been easy.”
He doesn’t respond. He’s too busy looking at one of the cars nearly collide with a pedestrian. You could’ve laughed. You used to make fun of the shitty drivers in Night City, knowing full well you’re one of them.
You get chased by a couple of cops, rules start to bend.
You used to wonder why you never left.
Then, you actually left, and you realized that hell, you can take the person out of Night City—can’t take the Night City out of a person.
Atlanta fucking sucked, but maybe you should’ve stayed there.
But then, a tiny voice whispers as you look out the window to the fresh night wind. You never would’ve met him.
It’s funny, you think. To come back and get a brain tumour in the shape of a rocker who can’t fucking touch anyone who loves him, who he loved, only for you to fall in love with a corpo you can’t fucking touch at all because… because there is no time left. It just isn’t fair.
“I used to be a corpo kid,” you confess, looking at him with a wry smile again. That catches his attention. He looks at you with those eyes that scrutinize you, interrogate you, peel you apart to your bare essentials and you have to look away before you can’t control your face anymore. God fucking damn it. “Not when it mattered, obviously, but… I remember what it was like. Grew up hating every single on of them.”
“Your parents were Arasaka?”
“Mhm. Security division.” It’s like your eyes are magnetic to his because when you blink, you find yourself regarding him again. Your fingers play at your lips. “Counterintelligence. I was supposed to go into that, too. Big dreams.” 
“I see.”
“Yeah, then my parents were tried for treason and murdered, so I got thrown out. That’s it.” Your hand falls away. You pick at the chipped nail polish on your thumb. “Never told anyone that. ‘Cept…” Jackie. Well, he’s fucking dead, now. “‘Cept you, now, I guess. Guess some corpos aren’t so bad.”
The corner of his mouth pinches up like he’s flattered and you can’t help the pleased warmth spreading through your chest. 
“Should I be honoured I am one of the few exceptions you have made?”
“Well, I don’t make exceptions often, so…” You grin slyly. He looks away just as you catch a flash of his smile growing. It’s a nice smile. You wish you saw it more often before the end of the road. Maybe it’s one of the regrets you have, too. “Yeah, maybe you should feel special.”
“Hm.”
“C’mon, Takemura. Humour the walking dead, yeah?” You stretch against the leather of his car seat with a pleased sound. “I’m spending what time I have left with who I want to. Can’t ask for much better than that.” A quiet hangs in the air as you melt against the black leather and you look at Takemura who’s staring at the wheel with an intensity you don’t often see. It makes your gut squirm. 
“And I? I am one of those people?”
You lean on one hip and look at him, bending a knee and resting an ankle on your thigh. He looks at you with an uncertainty—an uncertainty you’re sure echoes in your eyes.
It was business, then it wasn’t. Maybe it never was.
“Yeah. You’re one of the few on the short list.”
“Exceptions again.”
You laugh. “Yeah. You’re an exception to most things, I think. Weird, that.”
“How so?”
“Ah, I don’t know. I’ve had family—still do, ones that matter, you know. Just… no one ever like you, Takemura. Drives me crazy.”
“The feeling is mutual. Your mocking brings you onto thin ice, V.” His fingers tap against the steering wheel. The engine’s off so it seems more fidgety than anything. Weird. You never noticed he fidgeted before. Maybe he’s nervous?
About what?
“I must ask you something.”
“Shoot.”
“If you have a future, what do you see for yourself?”
Your eyebrows shoot up. You frown and pick at your flecking nail polish even more, looking at your hand and focusing more on that so you don’t have to answer your question. His eyes burn into you and you swallow, trying not to act like you haven’t thought, in regret, at night, about a hundred million fucking times the possibilities they could’ve had together.
You’re not about to say all that.
Instead: “Settling down with the family. Mama Welles, people at the Coyote.” You blatantly don’t look at him when you add, “Others. This has been enough action for a lifetime.” You rest your hands on your lap and chance a glimpse at him. He’s looking away from you, out the window on his side, and you shift in your seat. “How about you? You must’ve… had dreams. Before all this shit went down. You make it out of here and then what?”
When he looks at you, your heart nearly cracks at the sadness in his eyes. He smiles, but there is no strength, and his eyes are darker than the night surrounding them.
“I would go to the countryside, just as I’ve always wanted. Leave this, all of this, behind. Rural Japan is beautiful, so a small town would suffice where everyone knows everyone. We do favours for one another. It is community. Nothing like here.” His lips pull into a tiny frown. “When I was a younger man, I wanted a daughter,” is all he says. “I believe I could have been a great father, so perhaps… perhaps one day.”
“A daughter? Not a son?” you ask curiously, and he almost chuckles. You can’t help the faint smile on your face. 
“If my daughter grew up anything like her mother,” he explains with a slight glance towards you, “I would have more hope than a son who was like me.”
You frown.  “You’re not a bad man, Takemura. Any son like you—with your code of honour, your shitty selfie skills—no one’s gotta a chance.”
He merely scoffs in response. Again, with the you mocking him. It’s a wonder he lets you.
“But really, that sounds… nice. A daughter, a wife.” You drum your fingers against your knee and his eyes dart to yours, click like they were always destined to meet, and your lips part. Words stall on your tongue and you want to speak but in the dim lights, you are lost in the darkness of his eyes. Something comes, something goes, and you barely croak out, “Whoever marries you will have to deal with so much of your shit that the kids have to turn out alright. The complaining, for one. Picky eater for another.”
This time, he does chuckle and you swallow a breath at the sound. “Dealing with it comes with practice, V.”
“Is that so?”
“Shouldn’t you know?”
“I—“ For once, no funny retort, no witty quip shoots out of your mouth, and you realize that there is an implication—an intricate dance where they’re struggling not to step on each other’s toes and nearly failing at every turn, yet somehow, it works because they’re dancing, and it’s quiet, and it’s… it’s peaceful.
Shit, you’re getting a load of this. When’d you become a poet?
“I guess I should know,” you finally say. “Never understood why I got so giddy whenever I saw your texts, you know, seein’ your name flash on my phone.” You laugh bitterly. “Guess I know why, now.” He’s silent and you don’t look at him. You look at the dashboard where you’ve kicked your feet up a dozen times, the glove compartment that still has your sunglasses inside.
Shit.
“Thank you for everything. Shit’s a little… more bearable, I guess. When you’re around, that is.” The words come out stilted, awkward, but your heart is so heavy in your throat you feel like you’re going to choke. You look into your lap, your whole body incinerating under what you’re sure is the most judgemental glare of your life and you just hope to fucking God this man says something, does something.
Holy shit. You’re going to die of embarrassment. Didn’t even think that was possible.
Then, a loud sigh. A sigh you’ve heard often enough beside you right before a gunfight or when he has to eat the food you ordered for him or even the nights when they’re exhausted, bruised, and just plain tired right before going to sleep where they lay on the floor.
It’s exasperated, a how on earth did we get here, a very annoyed again, you’re so fucking stupid, and you’re still running through your list on what this particular sigh can mean before a hand gently takes hold of yours. Your eyes dart to his, blinking and he stares at you like you’ve just stabbed him. Your heart is fucking racing in your chest, pounding like thunder. His fingers fold over and you realize, as you interlace fingers, that his skin is burning at your touch. 
Or maybe, it’s the other way around.
They sit there in silence, not looking at one another, looking out windows, parts of the car, everything but each other, and when he squeezes your hand, you close your eyes and swallow your heart.
It’s over.
“V,” he murmurs, voice so deathly quiet and raspy in your ears that your gut clenches. You turn to watch him. “Tell me that you will not stop fighting.” You swallow your breath as his eyes flicker from your own to your parted lips. He inhales quietly and you swear you can feel his heartbeat pulsing in his fingers in your grip. “That this is not all for nothing.”
“It isn’t.“
“Then I was right.” His eyes flutter back to your gaze and he tilts his head. Wisps of fine hair escaping his manbun brush over his nose and you reach up on your own accord, swiping it behind your ear. You lean over the console, your elbow digging into the leather and, tentatively, you trail your fingers down his jaw, hold his face in your hand. “I am… what is that phrase you use so often?”
“SNAFU?”
“No.”
“Assblasted.”
“No.”
“Royally fucked?”
“We need to expand your vocabulary.” You smile nefariously as his other hand reaches for your chin. He pinches it lightly, thumb stretching up to brush over your lips and your face freezes at his touch. “But yes. Royally fucked. I wasn’t wrong when I said I needed you.”
“I think that meant a whole something else back then,” you whisper rawly and he smiles sombrely. His thumb leaves your mouth to brush your cheek, his eyes fixing on you as if he’s trying to memorize aspects of your face: the arch of your nose, the bow of your smile, the way your brow wrinkles. “Meant more business-like.”
“I did. And now, I believe the terms have changed.” He arches an eyebrow. “Are we at a mutual understanding, V?”
“Yes.” And I hate that we are. Your hand along his jaw lifts to wrap around his wrist. “Consider that feeling mutual, yeah? It goes both ways.”
“I will.” Another small smile graces his lips. It makes him look younger every time and you rub your thumb over the back of his hand. 
“Do you wanna grab something to eat before you drive me back home for some shuteye?”
“The choices here are atrocious, V.”
“Then, drinks,” you propose, letting go of his wrist. He lets go of your chin, and turning to face the front, you kick up your feet on his dash. He stares at you for a moment then sighs because there really isn’t anything he can do about it. Nor, do you think, he wants to. You squeeze his hand and send him a silly smile. “How about drinks? I wasn’t hungry anyway.”
“Are you paying?”
You eye him incredulously. “Who do you take me for? You?”
He snorts and the engine roars to life with a flick of his wrist. He grabs the wheel dominantly and you swallow at the way his fingers wrap around the handle. “The Afterlife, then?”
“Or, we could make it rustic.” You pull his hand into your lap playfully and run a thumb over his knuckles. His eyes flit over and you send him a smirk. “I know Mama Welles doesn’t like you, but the Coyote’s serving cheap. Happen to like me there.” He begins to pull out of their little overhang and he nudges their joined hands into your abdomen, silently telling you to buckle in. Rolling your eyes, you mumble out a ‘boomer’ underneath your breath before letting go of him and following orders.
He settles a hand on your thigh and squeezes. You hang an arm out the window. 
The wind’s running through the car, he has the radio on low, and they’re easing through onto the highway.
Your chest is lighter than a feather, mind’s quieter than a ghost.
You’ve seen scarier deaths, dealt a lot more. You know that silence is a bigger killer than most bullets.
But here you are now…
“I’m changing this,” Takemura says. “This music is terrible.”
…Shit, maybe life isn’t so bad, ending the way it is.
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javier-pena · 4 years
Text
alone
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Chapter 1 of The Hunt
Pairing: Din Djarin x fem!reader
Word Count: 4.4k
Rating: Mature (for now but that will - spoilers! - change eventually)
Summary: When your best friend and companion is abducted by a group of outlaws, you hire a Mandalorian to help track down the men and get your revenge. What seems like a simple enough task stretches into a month-long trek through inhospitable terrain while both you and the Mandalorian are trying to come to terms with events in your past you cannot change. Set after Season 2.
Warnings: mentions (and short descriptions) of death, murder, and torture | a lot of hurt and no comfort | mentions of loss | mild to moderate language | a lot - and I mean A LOT - of talk about Din’s hands lmao
Notes: This is my first attempt at a Mandalorian fic and the first time in months I’ve written anything. It’s vaguely inspired by my favorite western movies, True Grit (1969/2010), The Quick and the Dead (1995), and The World to Come (2020). So yes, this is going to be very much like a western. I also want to - again - thank Dani @javierpcna​ who was like “are you writing Mandalorian stuff?” about a month ago and has, since then, read through this chapter more often than me and encouraged me to continue to write it and offered so much valuable insight whenever I came to her with an idea ... seriously, Dani, this fic wouldn’t exist without you and I hope I can find a way to repay you! Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this first chapter (I’m already working on the second one) ...
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The day the Mandalorian arrives on Alvorine is the day you lose your best friend. You’re still busy putting out the fire, running your soot-blackened hand across your face, where the dirt mingles with the tears you’re too tired to stop from streaming down your face, when you hear the thrusters of a spacecraft roaring above you. You barely glance up; you can’t be bothered to. It could be the remnants of the Empire looking for recruits, it could be the New Republic looking for the remnants of the Empire, or it could be the bandits coming back for more. But what do you care? They already took away the one person you care most about in the galaxy. You just grip the shovel tighter and drive it into the soil so you can choke the fire underneath moist stones and dirt.
While you exhaust your body with physical labor, you occupy your mind with thoughts of revenge. Revenge as dark and quenching as the soil beneath you. With every load of dirt you heave onto the searing flames, your plan gains another sharp edge until all you can think of is driving the cutting edge down onto the throat of the man who gripped Brea’s arm and pulled her onto the speeder bike. Maybe his head would come off right away, maybe your tool would just obstruct his windpipe as you watch the life drain slowly out of his eyes. And even that would be too good an end for that monster.
It’s not just in your mind – those thoughts aren’t simply there to ground you while you continue your work in the ruins of what was once your home. It’s not pure fantasy, something to give you back a feeling of control. You are determined to follow through on it; you are going to hunt down these men who burned down your farm and stole Brea from you. You will not rest until they are all dead by your hand. And if you should die in the process … then you won’t go out without a fight, without taking as many of those bastards with you as you can. They have sealed their own fate by coming here today.
You know Brea isn’t dead; they won’t kill her unless she tries to kill one of them first. And she wouldn’t do that, she is too gentle for that, too docile. She would rather turn the other cheek. They should have taken you instead; she doesn’t deserve the fate that awaits her. You would’ve at least put up a fight, make them pay for what they did. And Brea? She would just die.
For now, she’s alive. But whatever you set out to do once you’re done here won’t be a rescue mission. You aren’t under the illusion you can save her. You know that even if you were to leave right now, even if you had your own speeder bike, you would never find her in time. No, this possibility hasn’t even crossed your mind. All you want to do is cause these men more pain than they caused you. You know it is impossible because you cannot imagine anything worse, but you sure as hell will do your best.
You straighten your back, drive the shovel into the ground, and use it as support while you try to catch your breath. The air burns in your lungs, and not just from the cold. There is also the steadily rising black smoke that makes breathing hard; your throat stings, so do your sides, and there is a bitter taste in your mouth. But you’re almost finished here, you’re almost done putting out the fire, so it won’t endanger the surrounding forest. And with every flame you bury, you also bury a piece of your soul until you feel like there is nothing left that makes you human, until all the pain and despair you’re feeling since listening to Brea’s screams grow quieter and quieter until they were swallowed up by silence has turned into a cold, brazen cry for revenge. But you’re glad this has made you less forgiving, less kind, less … human. Those things would only get in the way of the task ahead of you.
As the last flames go out with a wet hiss, one of Alvorine’s three blue white suns vanishes behind the treetops. You know the other two will be quick to follow. And you don’t have anywhere to spend the night. You wouldn’t mind sleeping with your back propped against a tree. You’ve done it often enough. But it’s winter, and the air is already cold and will be even colder once the other two suns set too. And you just lost every blanket, every single piece of fabric that could keep you warm in a small inferno. You know this is just an excuse, a comforting lie you tell yourself. The truth is you cannot spend a minute longer on this clearing, even if that means you have to walk the four miles to the next settlement. You’re so exhausted you cannot feel your legs, but you don’t care. Anything is better than spending the night here, even collapsing in the middle of the dark forest.
You leave the shovel where you stand and walk to the edge of the clearing, swallowing around the lump in your throat, trying to hold down more tears that are threatening to spill over and down your cheeks. Once you reach the edge of the forest, where the air is a bit clearer, you take a deep breath and turn around to look at the ruins of your home, now nothing more than a black pile of rubble. You have nothing, nothing but the clothes you’re wearing, not even a small trinket to remind you of Brea and the many happy hours you spent here tending to your fields, sweeping the front porch or sitting around the fireplace sharing supper. Even remembering how you worked on menial chores now feels like the most precious memory, one you will hold onto until your last breath. Because even though they have taken everything from you, they can’t take away the memory of Brea’s laugh.
***
They stare at you as you enter the inn. They stare and then look away. They can’t bear your presence because it reminds them of their own guilt. Not one of them came to your aid this morning, not one of them came afterwards to offer help. And you ignore them too because there is nothing left to say. All you want is some food and a dry place to sleep before you turn your back on them forever.
You sit down at a small table in a dark corner. The patrons around you either turn their backs to you or stand up to move their meals and conversations someplace else. It’s as if you’ve been marked. If you had any strength left in you, you would call them out on their behavior. Shit, you would wreak havoc, and only stop when the last one of them is on their knees begging for forgiveness. But you’re glad you’re too exhausted because your sudden hatred for everyone and everything scares you. The villagers don’t deserve to fall victim to your rage. There is nothing they could’ve done. They are just as defenseless and helpless as you. Would you have come to their aid if your positions were reversed? You would like to think so, but just because it gives you a false sense of moral superiority. Deep down you know the truth. Deep down you know you would hide too, praying that you would be spared.
As you dig into your bowl of soup, you realize how hungry you are. Even though everything tastes like ash in your mouth, your stomach is glad to have something to clench around when your thoughts stray to this morning’s events again. And you know there’s no need to punish yourself by refusing your body the nourishment it needs. The opposite, in fact – you know you’ll need all the strength you can get if you’re really going after them.
As you swallow one ashy bite after the other, you let your eyes wander around the room, looking for something that will distract you from your thoughts and your feelings of guilt. Everyone avoids your gaze; everyone acts as if your corner is empty. Everyone … except one stranger.
He sits in a booth close to the bar, his arms crossed over his chest, his gaze on you. Or at least you think he’s looking at you – he’s wearing a helmet that covers his entire head, the kind you’ve seen twice before in this corner of the galaxy. He’s a Mandalorian, a bounty hunter, and his presence here doesn’t really surprise you. Even though actually seeing one is a rare occurrence, stories about them are countless.
Alvorine is a planet without laws, a planet that lives by its own rules, so many criminals decide to hide out here while they wait for their crimes to be forgotten. There is no military presence on the planet, no judicial system, no one to catch and punish the wrongdoers. The planet follows the rules of whoever is in charge, which changes frequently, but none of the powerful people have enough resources to enforce those rules anyway. Disputes are often just settled by the parties involved in whatever way they see fit. Only the Mandalorians, who are hired by people on other worlds, by people who have never experienced what it is like to live on Alovrine, are brave enough to get involved in those disputes. You have to admit you do feel a tiny bit curious as to why that particular Mandalorian is here ... who hired him? And who is he hunting?
You tentatively let your gaze wander over his stoic body, over the beskar covering his arms and chest, over the bandolier wrapped around his upper body, over the visor hiding his eyes. If you had one like him on your side, you wouldn’t need to worry about getting your revenge. He would catch those men in the blink of an eye. And if you paid him enough, he would do to them whatever you wanted.
He would cut off their limbs but keep them alive long enough to feel it.
He would make them run for it, give them the illusion of hope, only to crush it like their bones.
He would let you watch, let you choose whatever punishment you saw fit.
You shift in your seat because you can almost smell the blood, you can hear a faint echo of their screams, and it makes you feel light-headed and nauseous, but also elevates you, lifts a weight off your shoulders, even if just for a brief moment.
But he’s not here to do your bidding. And when you lift your head again, he’s gone.
You finish your bowl of soup and then decide to rent a room upstairs for the night. You don’t have a place to stay anymore and it’s too dangerous to start your pursuit while it’s dark. The forest belongs to dangerous creatures during the night, more dangerous than any man out there. And you’re planning on staying alive for just a little while longer.
You stretch and yawn and move to get up when your path is suddenly blocked. It happens so fast you don’t register anything at first apart from the cold, hard beskar chest plate that is level with your face. Its unexpected appearance makes you lose your balance and you fall back down onto the bench you’ve been sitting on. The Mandalorian extends his hand, his fingers closing around thin air. It’s a half-hearted attempt to stop your fall, and it comes too late – your backside has already painfully collided with the hard wood.
“May I join you?” His voice sounds distorted through the modulator in his helmet. He sounds like a machine, not like a being with a heartbeat.
You want to tell him no, want to tell him to fuck off, but for tonight you have no fight left in you. So you nod.
He sits down and you expect to hear the clink of his armor, expect to feel a tremor when his heavy body comes to rest on a stool opposite you. But there is no sound, no movement, and the lack makes you sit up straighter. This isn’t just another cowardly villager you can get rid of by glaring at him … this is an apex predator.
You swallow with some difficulty. “Can I help you?” you ask, your voice level, your eyes resting on his glove-clad hands lying on the table. You figure you’re safe as long as you can see them.
At first, he doesn’t say anything. He just looks at you. Or at least you think he’s looking at you. You cannot see his eyes behind the tinted visor. No matter how uncomfortable the situation makes you feel, you try not to move … you try not to show any sign of weakness, to give him any excuse to lunge across the table and strangle you.
Finally, he answers. “I’m looking for work.”
Now you cannot help but move. You exhale sharply, and with that release of breath comes a release of tension as you slump backwards, your back hitting the wall behind you. You cross your arms over your chest. “I can’t help you,” you say. You don’t have any work to offer him, no work worthy of the skills of a Mandalorian who usually hunts down important people, kings, merchants, people who influence the course of the galaxy’s history. Following a few lowly bandits is not the work he’s used to. You don’t even want to tell him about it because you know he’d take it as an insult. And even if - by some miracle - your quest for revenge would be deemed a worthy cause in the eyes of the Mandalorian, you couldn’t afford his services.
The slightest movement of his helmet is the only reaction your answer gets out of him. Whether he shifts because he’s surprised or because he’s angry, or whether his scalp itches under the metal you cannot tell.
Still, you feel the need to explain yourself. “I’m sorry, I don’t have any money.”
Shit, that’s the wrong thing to say. It implies you have work for him, but that you’re too poor to pay him. For all you know, this could be a grave insult in Mandalorian society.
His fingers on the table clench around thin air again. “What can you offer?” he asks.
He doesn’t want to know about the job, the quarry as you know they call it. No, he just wants to know how much he can earn.
“240 credits,” you answer. It’s all you have. You won’t need it anymore.
He tilts his head and you expect him to refuse, but then he says, “That’s enough.”
You’re taken aback, surprised. He’s caught you off-guard. You were fully prepared to see him walk away at hearing the ridiculously low amount of money you just offered. “You don’t even know what the job is,” you protest. The last thing you need is a Mandalorian hunting you down because you’re not paying him enough.
“They told me,” he says with a nod behind him.
You follow the movement with your eyes and see heads whip to the side, gazes wandering downwards, you notice conversations being picked up again. White hot fury fills you, more powerful than the flames that destroyed your house.
“They had no right,” you press out through clenched teeth.
The Mandalorian doesn’t say anything. He sits still like a statue, unwavering, as you fight a small battle with yourself. You should leave without looking back. Messing with a Mandalorian is even more dangerous than the task ahead of you. But he’s offering you something invaluable, something no amount of credits can get you: a chance. If you go alone, you’ll be dead in about a week. There’s no use pretending you’ll get out of it alive. But if you accept the Mandalorian’s help – his services, you have to remind yourself – you might make it through two. You might get to see your dreams of revenge become reality.
You sigh deeply as a heavy weariness settles over you. You’re exhausted, and now that all the adrenaline has left your body, you can feel all the small cuts and bruises today’s labors have left behind. And you feel empty … cold and empty, and utterly alone.
The Mandalorian still doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t defend the villagers, he doesn’t tell you what he knows about you or the job, he doesn’t try to persuade you to take him up on his offer, nor does he walk away from it. He just sits there and waits for you to make up your mind, as if it’s all the same to him. And it probably is. Either he goes with you and earns some money, or he doesn’t and looks for work elsewhere. He is completely detached from the whole affair. There is no emotional investment, just a job that needs to be done.
He doesn’t care if you live or die, he just cares if you pay him or not.
This realization is what finally helps you make up your mind. “I want to hire you,” you say, your tongue heavy in your mouth. All you really want is to sleep.
There is no reaction for the longest time but then the Mandalorian nods. You’re not sure if you’re supposed to say something, give him details or explain the specifics of the job to him. But before you can decide what to say next, he stands abruptly.
“I’ll be back in a few days,” he says before turning around.
Your brain needs a moment to catch up but when it does, you’re already on your feet. “Wait,” you say, and to your surprise the broad, steel-clad man listens to you.
He doesn’t face you, but he stops.
You briefly consider asking him if you can accompany him, but you don’t. You don’t have to ask, you get to decide.
“I’m coming with you,” you tell him.
You tell a stranger, a dangerous one at that, one who makes his money by making other people’s lives a living hell, that you will travel with him through dark, deserted forests where no one will stop him from taking what he wants from you instead of earning it, where no one will come to your aid should he not honor the deal you apparently just made with him. And you don’t care. Because no matter what he will do to you, it can’t be worse than what has already been done.
But all your worries and fears focus in on just one tiny aspect of this whole, fucked-up situation when he says, “I work alone.”
You don’t want to negotiate. This shouldn’t even be up for debate. You’re his employer now, you get to decide how things are done. But if you insist on this, he could just walk away from you. And you cannot let that happen now that you’ve had an idea of what it would be like to have a Mandalorian on your side.
“We’re not a team,” you say. “Think of me as an interested party. As someone who is fascinated by your work.”
You’re not sure if that is the right thing to say. His shoulders move, but he still doesn’t turn around. When he speaks again, you know it was the wrong thing to say.
“I work alone or not at all.”
You don’t want to accept that. You want to be there when those men are punished for what they did. You don’t want to wait around for the Mandalorian to come back, not when you don’t have anywhere to wait around in. You’ve lost everything. Had he talked to the villagers as he claims, he would know this. Or maybe he does. Maybe he knows you lost your home today but doesn’t care. He doesn’t even know the definition of the word home. It means nothing to him.
You take a deep breath. “Then I won’t be needing your services.”
This finally makes him turn around. Everything in you screams for you to take a few steps back, to put yourself out of his reach. You can feel the atmosphere between you shift – he draws back his shoulders, makes himself even taller than he already is. And you know, you just know, that refusing his offer, that backtracking on your agreement is the worst mistake you made tonight.
You’re pretty sure that not honoring a deal is the worst insult to a Mandalorian.
“Going alone will be your death,” he says when you cannot bear the tension a second longer.
“What’s it to you?”
The words are out. They are a challenge, one you didn’t mean to make, one you shouldn’t have made, but it’s done now. Your hand begins to tremble, and your feet grow cold with fear as you prepare yourself for his reaction. You don’t know if he will hit you, tie you up, torture you, or just kill you on the spot. He could do all of these things without having to fear any repercussions. You curse yourself for not having been more careful, for making this fatal mistake, because now Brea will go unavenged. Just because you couldn’t keep your damn mouth shut, just because you’re stubborn and hot-headed and oh so stupid.
But to your surprise, the Mandalorian shrugs. He lifts his broad shoulders, then lowers them again as your eyes follow the movement. But he’s not giving you anything more: He doesn’t insist on going alone, he doesn’t turn around and leave, he just keeps standing opposite you, motionless, emotionless, until you’re convinced you imagined the shrug.
So you decide to make the next move by removing yourself from this situation before he changes his mind and drags you back to his ship to do whatever he wants to you. You take a deep breath and start to step around him, a movement that is almost impossible to complete in this small space you’re both in. But you attempt it, nevertheless. When you’re level with him, doing your best not to brush up against him so you won’t enrage him, you hear his voice. It’s just one sentence, four words, but for some reason it sounds so much more human than it did when he was opposite you. Maybe it has something to do with the distance between his helmet and your ear, maybe it’s the angle from which the sounds hit your eardrums or maybe it’s because you feel light-headed, dizzy with the realization he hasn’t killed you yet and probably won’t.
He says, “Have it your way.”
You stop right next to him, staring ahead at a group of three men who do their best not to look at you. But you don’t see them anyway. In fact, you don’t see anything at all because the rushing sound in your ears drowns out everything else, even other senses.
“You can come with me,” he says, and it’s the first time he has spoken two sentences in a row. “But you do as I say.” Three. “If I tell you to run, you run.” Four. “If I tell you to get out of the way, you do so.” Five. “And if I tell you to kill, you kill.” Six.
Then nothing, just the faint sound of his deep breaths through the modulator.
Your thoughts are racing, tripping over their own feet like children running down a hill, and they’re unbearably loud. Everything is loud suddenly, from the sound of the barkeep filling a glass to the way that woman over there is chewing her food. The only thing that’s quiet is the last one you would have suspected to be so: the Mandalorian. Now he is waiting for you to say something and as he does, he balls his hand into a fist and then releases the tension again, over and over like a nervous tic, like he needs an outlet for the tension in his body, the tension you have no idea he is feeling until you see his arm flex beneath the fabric covering it.
But, once more, you’re at war with yourself. You don’t know what to tell him. There is still that shimmer of hope on the horizon, the light that makes you believe you stand a chance if you bring him along. But his terms … you’re not sure if you can accept them. He doesn’t know Alvorine or the men you would be hunting half as well as you do. And you’ve never been one for following orders. So if you feel that his assessment of a situation is wrong, you’re not sure you’ll be able to run just because he tells you to.
You have a feeling that defying his orders would be the most dangerous thing you could ever do, even more dangerous than hunting down a group of ruthless bandits who like to torture and kill for fun.
“All right,” you say finally.
His fist unclenches one last time and he exhales slowly.
“But when we find them,” you swallow hard, once, but your mouth is completely dry, “I get to decide what happens to them.”
The Mandalorian turns toward you so abruptly that you almost lose your balance. You lean back and hit your elbow on the wall behind you. The pain makes you curse under your breath.
“Agreed,” he whispers. He sounds like a machine again, as if everything that makes him human is shut away beneath that cold, hard, invaluable beskar steel. You too feel cold suddenly, cold and afraid. “But until then you do as I say. Understood?”
You nod, not trusting your voice. He is too close to you, and drowns out everything else, even the sounds that you considered to be too loud mere seconds ago. If he wouldn’t be wearing a helmet, you would be able to feel his breath on your cheek. He takes up your field of vision almost entirely. You’ve never felt more on display, and yet more hidden. And you know that if you say the wrong thing now, it will have terrible consequences.
So you just nod again.
“We leave in the morning,” he tells you, then turns around suddenly and leaves, his cape trailing behind him.
All sounds come rushing back at once, as if you’ve just emerged out of a pool of water. You release your breath quickly, only now realizing you’ve been holding it. Then you slump back against the wall, a shaking, quivering mess.
***
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bitchwhoreofastorm · 3 years
Text
[based on a headcanon by @nemenalya ]
The boy with no name has died. A stiff wind's blown over High Hrothgar and swept him right off the edge of the cliff.
The other students are alerted by the screaming. The boy with no name's only friend in the world, a shy little lad who's been here only a year, stands by the cliff and screams and screams and screams. Since nothing fun ever happens in High Hrothgar the others are quick to gather around the normally-unpopular child. He's screeching something that goes beyond language, pointing frantically at the cliff and wailing bloody grief all the way to Sovngarde, and he keeps on screaming while his cohort gathers curiously around him.
There is a minute, a single minute, where all the students of Hrothgar stand  around, and nobody says a word but for the lad who's screaming. There's a rule on High Hrothgar that speaking is strictly forbidden-- never adhered to, of course, except when Custodian Lundga is around-- but the boy is making such a racket that, after said minute and by unspoken consensus, it is agreed upon that the silence has already been broken. So, excited for a change of pace, they all together immediately start chattering, in loud voices to be heard above the wind and the screaming, of course.
"Why is he shouting?" asks Nhemakhela of Winterhold. "Are you alright?"
"You should slap him!" urges Telmo of the Reach.
"Why should I?"
"Make him shut up."
"My gods!" shouts Hoag of Morrowind, who's gone and lied down on his belly at the place where the rock opens into sky. His head hangs over the edge of the cliff, his thick black hair being tossed moppishly around his head. "Someone's dead down there!"
And at once every student of Hrothgar is on their bellies peeking over the side of the cliff.
"Gods!" cries Nhemakhela. "Is he alive?"
"With his neck at that angle?" asks Telmo.
With a sort of retching sound, Chemua of Morrowind, Hoag's sensitive second-hand, hauls himself off of the ice and staggers away.
"Do we go down?" asks Telmo.
"I call dibs on the corpse."
"Eeew."
"What was his name?"
"He was the mute one, ent got no name."
"Nay, he had a little friend, though. He'd know the name."
"Well? Bhag? What was his name? Bhag, quit screaming! What was his name? Bhag...?"
The conversation ends there, unfortunately, because Lundga Custodian of Hrothgar arrives with a large stick in hand and a mind to crack every noisy Tongue that's broken the mountain's vow of holy silence. Sensible woman, she tells them to leave the body where it is, she has Nhemakhela slap some sense into Bhag, she makes Chemua scoop up the sick off her nice white snow, she sends everyone scurrying off to go meditate on this experience. And she smooths down her fur cloak, sighs into the stiff wind, turns and shares a meaningful look with Paarthurnax, who's flown over to observe the scene with his mild drakeish curiosity.
"Didn't learn his feim," Lundga remarks to the dragon, which earns her a coarse reptilian laugh.
And then life returns to normal on High Hrothgar...
...
His throat is raw to burning, his fingers frozen stiff, but the boy still takes his careful sweet time hiking back to the cave. It's a sorry little hollow, near-uninhabitable as it faces right into the howling wind, which makes it perfect, for nobody but him would ever think to go there. He pauses at a ledge, looks carefully behind him, tip-toes across and around a large granite outcrop, to the entrance of the miserable niche. Pressing hard to the rock-face so as not to slip, he pushes aside the thick curtain of hides hanging over the cave entrance and moves into the warm space beyond.
"Well?" asks Bhag, the moment he enters. "Did it work?"
The boy no longer without a name gives his friend a sort of dazed grin. Not known for his speaking, voice still sore from all the screaming he's just done, he can do little more than nod vigorously.
Bhag-- tall for his age with his blond hair in braids, face ruddy-red from spending hours in the heat of the cave-- breaks into a wide smile. He rushes forwards and embraces the boy whose beaming face is the spitting image of his own. "So it worked!” he cries, with a hearty thump on the back. “What did I tell you, eh?"
"They called me Bhag," the boy says, voice muffled in Bhag's shoulder.
"You are Bhag," replies Bhag with a voice also muffled.
"I'm Bhag."
"Both, we both are. Now we’re both--”
"Bhag?"
The intrusive voice breaks them apart like cleaved rock and they turn to face the cave entrance.
Quite unannounced, Hoag of Morrowind lets himself in through the hide-door and brushes some snow from his chest.
"Bhag," Hoag says again, looking between the two. "And... Bhag. Huh! Now that's one more Bhag than I'd thought."
For a moment neither Bhag, not even the Bhag accustomed to talking, can think of a response to that.
What follows is a whole minute of awkward staring between them and Hoag.
And at the end of that minute Hoag goes, "Bah!", and shuffles over towards their fire to thaw his cold hands.
"How'd you know?" utters the boy now known as Bhag, face flushed red.
"I've seen corpses," replies Hoag. "I know corpses. And that wasn't a corpse of a man, was it?"
Neither Bhag can think of much of a response to that, either. They stand there, guilty, pressed tightly shoulder-to-shoulder, watching as Hoag thaws his hands over the fire. Hoag is much older than them, nearly at the end of his stay at Hrothgar, and despite his short stature he cuts an intimidating figure, what with his harsh face and his thick black caterpillar eyebrows.
"It's okay," whispers Bhag to his friend now also called Bhag. "Steep out there. We ought to kill him-- I'll push him--"
But Hoag, of course, hears, and Hoag barks out a laugh. "Save it," he says. "Nobody saw me come. And I shan't blab this secret of yours."
Neither Bhag can think of much of a response to that, either.
Hoag shifts on his feet. “Is that the thu’um?” he asks. “Makes you look like each other. Never seen anything like that… you made it up?”
“Bhag did,” says the boy now known as Bhag. “He made it.”
Bhag makes a modest snorting sound. “Ah, he made it. Taught me how to understand the words, like.” 
“So, what’s the plan, then?” asks Hoag. “Now you’re both Bhag? Why?”
The boy now known as Bhag looks down at the fire, at Hoag’s dirty fingernails flickering in the orange light. He feels Bhag look at him, and he looks back at Bhag, and, having reached a mutual decision, Bhag speaks on his behalf.
“I don’t like talking,” says Bhag. “And I don’t like people.” 
“I’m different,” Bhag adds. “I’ve always been different from others. Why they sent me up here. I’m a changeling, they said-- like a spirit?” 
“I get tired,” Bhag complains. “Tired of your world that makes no sense. It hurts my head to try and work out why you do the things you do.” 
“So we decided to share,” says Bhag. “Share the burden.” 
 “So we don’t understand them,” says Bhag. “Let them not understand us!” 
“We’re not like you. Not nobles. Nobody’d miss either of us.”
“They’d be sufficed with one.”
Hoag listens to the tale attentively, watching them both close. Both Bhags find it impossible to imagine what he’s thinking. 
“... Well,” says Hoag finally. “Bhag Two-Tongue.”
Bhag snorts out a flattered laugh. 
“Bhag Two-Tongue,” Hoag repeats himself. “I’m leaving here soon. Me and Chemua are going back to Morrowind in a month’s time. Cause it seems to me that we have a problem much the same-- these Cyrod-worshipers, these dragon-faithful, cannot be understood by us.” With that famous cool aloofness that makes him the envy of all the boys, he turns away from the fire. “If you survive this mountain, if you don’t fall to your doom, come find me in Ebonheart. I could use more men with eyes enough to see what a farce this world is.”
And then, cool as frost, he slips out of their warm cave and into the tempest beyond.
“Religious, ent he?” asks Bhag, staring after the elder boy. “What’s all that talk about Cyrod? Well, they say he’s going to be a king one day.” He turns to his companion. “Morrowind, huh. East with the elves. We’d not be the strangest ones there, not with those two for competition... But what do you think?”
And the boy no longer without a name smiles. “Let’s go there.”
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chibsytelford · 4 years
Text
Queen of my Heart
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* GIF CREDIT TO CREATOR *
word count - 2139
warnings - slight mention of strangulation, murder, swearing, angst - I think that’s it. 
a/n - i haven’t described reader at all. I’m actually really nervous to post this for some reason. I am sure this is the longest thing I have written yet, and idk just nervous. Reblogs and comments are welcomed, and if you would like to be added/removed from my taglist just let me know!
P.s I didn’t mean for it to be this long, and it is kinda based on the song Queen of my Heart by Westlife (my guilty pleasure). Italics are flashbacks and the lyrics.
You knew from the start that getting into a relationship with Angel Reyes might not have been the best decision. Pasts will do that to you. You knew when you first laid eyes on him, that inside he was hiding his pain. The only reason you noticed it was because you were hiding the exact same pain as him. Normally, you avoided guys with baggage, because frankly you could barely deal with your own, never mind someone else’s, but something about him just kept you gravitating more towards him, as each day passed.
It started out in his father’s butcher shop, you had just finished work and you were in the mood for some steak, so you finally checked out la carniceria and you knew the second you walked in you were in trouble. All you wanted was a bit of steak, but you left with (not that you were complaining) Angel Reyes’ phone number. He gave you some standard cheesy pick up line, his smile not quite reaching his eyes, and you knew as soon as he opened his mouth that you were done for, your ‘I don’t do baggage rule’ going straight out the shop door.
It took you a few days to text him. You actually drafted up a ‘Why I should text Angel Reyes list’ and a ‘Why I shouldn’t text Angel Reyes list’ and funnily enough, the list that had more on it was the ‘Why I shouldn’t list’ but as it turns out, the lists were pointless, because you text him anyway.
Your first date you walked around the streets of Santo Padre, just chatting away about life in general, what you did for a job, what he did for a job (he didn’t tell you that much, just that he was in a club with some other men) and of course you didn’t want to pry, it was the first date and all. You spoke about pretty much everything, except the past. It was too early for that. At the end of it, he walked you home, and left you on your door step, wishing you had invited him in, wishing you had kissed him, wishing you had asked him on a second date. But you didn’t need to wait long for a second date.
2 days after your first date, you were on the back of Angel’s motorbike, both hands wrapped tightly around his torso. He had insisted on taking his bike, he wanted you to enjoy the thrill of it as much as he did, and if you were being honest, it was absolutely thrilling, as well as absolutely terrifying. He drove you both to a small forest, where you enjoyed a picnic and the scenery and the attention that Angel was giving you. It was then you decided to pry, just a little bit.
“Tell me Angel, what secret are you carrying?” You asked catching him off guard.
“What makes you think I’m carrying any?” He responded, popping a strawberry in his mouth, conveniently answering a question with another question.
“Honestly? The first time I saw you, when you gave me that hideous pick up line” you both laughed at the memory “the smile you gave me afterwards, it was genuine, but it wasn’t quite a full smile, you know?”
Angel took a moment to gather his thoughts. First he rubbed his beard, then he rubbed his neck, and then he fiddled with his fingers. You placed your hand over his, comforting him, silently telling him there was no rush to answer the question.
He sighed, and slightly shifted his body so he could look at you. “Well, uh, the thing is, I’m not good at this shit, feelings” you could see the pain etched on his face, the way his eyebrows twitched and the way he couldn’t meet your eyes for more than a second.
“Do you want me to go first?” you softly asked, brushing your fingers across his ringed hand, soothing him, and yourself. You knew if you expected him to open up so soon, you had to give him something back.
Angel swiftly nodded, and relaxed slightly, and it was his turn to rub circled on your hand, silently telling you he was listening.
“I came to Santo Padre to get away from my family, my step father specifically”. You took a deep breath and continued “he was horrible. But for some reason, my mother couldn’t bring herself to leave him, something about love. I don’t know” you hated telling this story, if you could call it that, but something about Angel just made you want to tell him everything. “One day, I got home and found him on top of my mother, his hands around her throat, and so I grabbed a kitchen knife, and I stabbed him until I knew he was dead.” Angel’s body tensed and he stopped caressing your hand for a split second, shocked at your revelation. You pulled your hand away instantly, wrapping them around your body.
“Shit Y/N, I’m so fucking sorry you had to go through that” Angel murmured, pulling you into him and placing a soft kiss on your temple, but you could tell his demeanour had changed slightly.
“My mother luckily vouched for my version of events, and so I got away with it, but that feeling of killing someone never leaves you, it takes over your mind and soul” you felt Angel nodding at your remark, like he was admitting he had killed someone too. “Anyway, I stayed there for another few years, in that godforsaken house, but I knew, deep down, as much as she tried to hide it, my mother looked at me differently, so I got out of there, and came here a few years ago, I’ve been laying low, still trying to wrap my head around what I done, that’s probably why you’ve never seen me before. It was fate that took me to your father’s shop” you nudged him in the shoulder, trying to lift the mood slightly.
“That it was” Angel replied back, “And I guess now it’s my turn huh” you nodded in agreement. “Well, I lost my mother, Marisol, years ago. She was murdered” As soon as Angel uttered those words, you knew why he had tensed earlier and you knew why he was just that little bit colder towards you. Because you had murdered someone, and his mother was murdered. “We found the guy, but we kept him alive. He was ordered to do it” You weren’t sure if Angel would want you to touch him, so you kept your hands to yourself, waiting for him to continue his story. “I carry the pain of her death with me every single day, I don’t think I’ll ever get over it” he admitted.
“Of course you won’t, it’s your family, your mother and that will always stick with you in your heart” you said, reassuring him that it was normal. “It seems we are both pretty fucked up, huh?” Angel commented, lifting the mood once again ever so slightly.
“Do you look at me differently now? Knowing that I murdered someone?  I did to my stepfather what someone did to your beloved mother” you questioned.
Angel took a second to answer. “You had your reasons, reasons I agree with, so no, I don’t feel differently towards you” but as Angel said that, you were second guessing him, and you always would.
After your second date, when you got home, Angel asked you to officially be his girlfriend. You said yes, but there was still a small part of you that thought it was a bad idea, and that it could only end badly. You thought Angel only asked you to be his girl because you both shared stories of your past and you clicked together, and you said yes, because you really liked him, but also because you thought you deserved happiness, and he did too, even though you still carried the thought inside you that Angel looked at you a little different after your revelation. You knew you were being selfish, but you couldn’t stop yourself.
 Recently Angel had been spending more time with the club, over time you had learned completely what they did, and you stood by Angel. Everyone had their reasons for doing things, and you knew that better than most people. You felt that he was avoiding you more than usual, staying out later, leaving earlier in the mornings, barely responding to texts, and something inside you, just didn’t really care anymore. You had had a wonderful couple years being by Angel’s side, but you always knew that something like this might happen.
You quickly fired a text to Angel telling him to meet you at your place. The forest where your second date took place.  
He arrived on his bike 5 minutes after you, and you watched him walk towards you. It seemed to take an eternity until he was standing in front of you. It was the same place, but you felt like a completely different person standing here now, a few years on.
“Hey” you said, letting out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. “Thanks for coming”
“Of course I came” he answered back, rubbing the back of his neck. You wondered if he was feeling the same as you. It would make the whole thing a bit easier if he did.
“I just wanna-“  Angel cut you off, holding a hand up to stop you talking. “Can I go first?” You nodded at him, secretly glad he wanted to.
“I love you, I really do, but I think you know as well as me, we stopped working months ago, I’m not good at this shit, feelings” you both said together, causing a small smile from the man stood in front of you. “Exactly, I don’t know if you’ve noticed I’ve been distant lately, the shit with the club has taken over my life completely, but I think I’m just realising now, that we jumped into this too quickly” Angel revealed, stuffing his hands in his pockets. You nodded, acknowledging what he said and taking a second to gather your thoughts.
“I mean, Angel, I love you too, but I have to admit, you’re right. I should be angry you’ve been coming home late, I should be angry that you barely reply to my texts, but honestly I haven’t been. I think we did rush into this like you said, after our second date, where we both revealed our pasts, I think we took comfort in knowing that our pasts were out there, and we weren’t being judged. I know that now”. You both visibly relaxed slightly, and the atmosphere shifted too. It was calm. Nice.
Angel made the first move, grabbing your hand and placing a soft kiss on your palm. You closed your eyes for a second, engraving the memory of the kiss in your mind.
“Thank you Y/N, for trusting me with your secret, for listening to my pain and past, for just being you. I know we didn’t work out, but I just want you to know, I will always remember you.” Angel wiped a stray tear that had managed to escape his eyes. “Fuck, look at me” he laughed.
So here we stand in our secret place
Where the sound of the crowd is so far away
You take my hand, and it feels like home
We both understand, it where we belong
So do I say, do I say goodbye
We both have our dreams we both want to fly
So let’s take tonight, to carry us through the lonely times
“God Angel, you’ve got me crying now” you laughed back also wiping away your tears.  “I’m glad we met. You accepted me for who I am, and for that I will always thank you, and cherish you. Who knows, maybe under different circumstances, we would have worked out, but I can honestly say I’m thankful for the years we have spent together, it just wasn’t meant to be”.
You and Angel gave each other one last hug, one last smile, one last look. “Take care, querida, I’ll always remember you” Angel whispered, placing your hand over his heart.  He then let go and headed back to his bike. You watched him walk away, you watched him climb onto the bike and you watched him drive away from you. You were sad of course, but you knew that it was for the best.
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I'll always look back as I walk away
Memories will last for eternity
And all of our tears will be lost in the rain
When I found my way back to your arms again
But until that day, you know you are
The Queen of my heart
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bluesylveon2 · 3 years
Text
How to Confess to a Guy
Summary: Levi and Hange have a crush on one another for years. It is now time for someone to step up and confess!
Disclaimer: Attack on Titan is a manga/anime series written by Hajime Isayama and published by Kondasha
© All rights reserved
A/N: @levihanweek Thank you for hosting the Levihan Eggschange event! I enjoyed participating in it.
To my giftee, I hope you find your gift and enjoy it. I hope the clues I gave you helped as well. Enjoy! :)
Camp Paradis is a 7-week, 400-acre summer camp for teenagers hidden deep in the woods of Washington state. Founded in the 1950s by the Fritz family, it is run by Dot Pixis, a man famous for his many achievements when he was a camper many years ago. It is known for offering a variety of activities for each camper. Some activities included fishing, sailing, swimming, paddle boarding, and more!
The camp had a small lake with 12 cabins surrounding it. Each cabin had three campers and one counselor. Each camp counselor was typically seniors and college students. Additionally, there was an even bigger lake, Lake Maria, where the camp's rival, Camp Marley, resided across. Camp Marley was also 7 weeks but had 500 acres, and it was by Theo Magath.
No two counselors in Camp Paradis are alike. Each counselor is unique. For example, Erwin Smith, the counselor for Ursus cabin, is greatly admired by his campers because of his dedication and leadership quality. He is the counselor who typically leads his cabin to victory every year at the Paradis games that occur at the last week of camp.
On the other hand, Levi Ackerman, the counselor for Vulpes cabin, was known as very strict with his campers. Other campers from other cabins note how it always smells like detergent, and his campers clean the cabin often.
(They are in the woods, for crying out loud! How did he manage to bring all of the cleaning supplies? This remained a mystery to everyone except in the Vulpes cabin.)
Just like any other teenage-related camp, the campers always spread rumors to relieve their boredom. Some of which have not been debunked.
Rumor 1: Bigfoot is hidden somewhere deep in the woods that has yet to be found. There were occasional sightings near the camp in the previous years. Dot Pixis himself almost caught him one day but failed. Anyone who can find and capture Bigfoot can earn a generous reward from Pixis. Eren and his friends actually tried to look for it but ran into his older half-brother, Zeke, instead (he kind of looked like one in the dark). He and his friends did not realize they walked all the way to Camp Marley.
Rumor 2: Someone went to Camp Marley to serenade Annie Leonhart when she was outside playing the piano. Annie refused to reveal who, yet she blushed every time someone from Camp Marley asked. Someone (*cough Ymir) had an idea who. Some campers claimed to see Ymir often tease Armin after the rumors started. It is possible the Armin did it.
Rumor 3: Levi Ackerman likes Hange Zoe from Strix cabin and vice versa. Actually, it seemed more like a fact than a rumor to everyone except them.
Let's look at the evidence:
Evidence 1: Levi always takes care of Hange when she forgets to take care of herself. It typically ranges from, but not limited to: making sure she eats, jumping into any time she is at risk for injury without a second thought, tending to her wounds when she does get hurt, forcing her to bathe (Connie accidentally walked into it once. He vowed to constantly check on Levi and Hange's whereabouts before he gets killed by Levi's death glare), and "accidentally" eliminating any suitors Hange may have.
(He does not actually kill them or anything. That is against camp rules. There was one time when Zeke Yeager went to Camp Paradis to confess his feelings to Hange. He actually almost made it to her cabin but a random shoe "accidentally" hit him on the head, causing him to stumble and fall into the lake. No one knows how he fell, but Hange walked out to see what was going on. She saw Levi drinking tea nearby, while mysteriously missing a shoe, and went to him. Apparently, she did not see Zeke at all, so Zeke had to get help from Pieck, who was hiding nearby)
Evidence 2: Hange rants to Levi about her latest research back home. Hange can talk anyone into sleeping with the amount of research she does. Yet, Levi stays up to listen. It could be because of his insomnia, but he never gets tired of listening to her rants. Other campers note that he at least looks interested every time Hange rants.
Evidence 3: The one incident last year when Hange was jealous and did not talk to Levi for half of the camp duration. There was a rumor going around that Levi was dating Petra, counselor of Lynx cabin. As a result, Hange hung out with Moblit, counselor of Lupus cabin, more that year instead. Hange claimed it was to give the couple space, but only her closest friends could tell something was up.
For instance, Eren was hiking on another expedition to find Bigfoot when he ran into Hange, kicking down a tree in anger. Eren immediately ran back to camp in hopes that Hange did not notice him and broke his bones. He was actually intimidated by her for a week.
(In reality, Hange was so sure Levi was going to confess to her that year. Additionally, Levi was jealous of how Hange spent time with Moblit more. Not everyone in camp could tell except for his campers Eren, Jean, and Connie. They could feel the chills running down their spines every time Levi was in the cabin with them, and it was summer.)
Evidence 4: Levi was always by Hange's side. Anyone in the camp can tell you that Levi is at least nearby Hange unless it is for very personal reasons (except bathing). He mainly stayed close to her after last year's incident when he literally kicked down her door and cleared the misunderstandings.
(In reality, Levi and Petra were not dating. Petra had confided to Levi about dating advice (for a reason he is unaware of, except everyone in the camp *cough Hange *cough). In the end, Levi remained single and had to fix the Strix cabin's door. On the bright side, Petra started dating Oluo Bozado from Meles cabin.)
Neither party had ever confessed to one another despite all the evidence proving that they have feelings for one another. Now that both Levi and Hange are about to graduate high school, it was the perfect time to confess before they go their separate ways because of their careers.
However, life is very unexpected, and when you add Hange to the mix…
Well, anything goes.
---
"This is it," Hange said to herself as she got everything ready in her canoe. She was prepared to sail across the lake towards Levi's cabin.
Both cabins were situated on different sides of the lake. The camp was designed so one half was for boys and the other half was for girls. It was a very dumb inconvenience for Hange.
Hange scoffed as she sat down on the canoe and began rowing. "Why couldn't our cabins be placed next to each other. It would give me less work to do." The only guy and girl cabins next to each other were Petra's cabin and Mike's cabin.
Hange decided that today was the day she will confess to Levi. They have been in an awkward "does he/she like me? does he/she not?" for years now, and none of them confessed at all. There are even rumors about it, for crying out loud!
The two had met three years ago when Hange and Levi were campers at Camp Paradis. It was really unexpected. Hange was ready to get down in the dirt during the activities and often kept some insects to study. On the other hand, Levi was a clean freak and a prodigy at the camp activities. It became sort of like a friendly competition between the two, and then they suddenly started hanging out more. They have known each other for years. She even calls herself his best friend.
(She never realized how recently Levi would scowl every time she claimed to be his best friend. To him, she was much more than that.)
Overall, Hange would look forward to seeing Levi again every summer.
It has been four years of dancing around whatever they have that Hange now dared herself to confess before the summer ends, and they leave for college. It is better to do something and get rejected (which she hopes does not happen) than do nothing.
Hange stopped rowing when she got close enough that Levi has to hear her. She could make out his figure sitting on the front steps of his cabin with Mike, Erwin, and Furlan.
She sets the oar to the side, takes a deep breath, and presses play on the small radio she took from Rico's cabin. The beginning notes of the song plays in the air.
You can do this
Hange began to sing the first line.
---
Minutes before
Mike, Erwin, and Furlan were talking about who knows what, not Levi was not paying attention anyway. His mind was preoccupied with a certain eccentric girl he knew.
She was very secretive lately. Sometimes she would freak out whenever Levi approached her, and he has not seen her all day. He even planned on confessing to her after dinner. It seemed as if Hange was preoccupied with something.
Levi would not even get to say one word before Hange ran off, claiming she is busy and cannot be disturbed.
Levi scowled at the thought. Hange would usually tell him beforehand if she is busy, but her saying nothing? Something is definitely up, but she wants to not tell him then it was fine by him (or so he says).
Furlan, who noticed Levi's brooding, smirked. "Hey Levi, are you thinking about Hange again?"
Mike and Erwin stopped talking and smirked as well.
Levi rolled his eyes. "I was not thinking about Hange. At all." He said in a serious tone.
"Mhmm," Furlan replied. He shifted in his spot and gave Levi a smug look. He was not convinced.
"Don't hide it, Levi," Mike added. "We all know how you go goo-goo eyes every time Hange enters the room. You are always checking up on her too."
"I don't make goo-goo eyes at Hange," Levi deadpanned with a monotone voice. "I only check up on her because it is a miracle she can see those dirty her glasses she wears."
Erwin's smirk never faded away as he lightly elbows Furlan on the side. "He always calls her by two nicknames, Furlan. He gives anyone more than one nickname too. They might not sound endearing, but he rarely calls Hange by her name."
"Can you imagine what Levi is thinking now?" Furlan laughed. He turned around from his spot, so he back faced Levi, hugged himself, and started making fake kissing noises.
"Oh, Hange! I don't want to be just friends with you. I will marry you, and we're going to have 100 bab-"
Levi slapped Furlan on the head. He stood up the moment Furlan spoke. Mike and Erwin were in the background howling with laughter.
"Cut the crap, Furlan," Levi said and made his way back to his spot on the steps.
"Ok, ok. You win, Levi." Furlan rubbed the back of his head where Levi had slapped him. Luckily for him, Levi did not hit him too hard, and it did not hurt that badly. He goes back to talking to Mike and Erwin about other counselors about other rumors they heard. He will tease Levi again later.
Meanwhile, Levi rolled his eyes at his friend's childishness and began to think about the subject of his earlier torment. It was already almost dinner time, and he has not seen Hange all day. He was hoping she would at least appear for dinner, or else he would have to drag her to the dining hall by force.
Levi was busy with his thoughts and staring at his feet to notice anything around him. He was too busy to focus on the music playing, and the girl he (does not) have a crush on making her way over from across the lake.
"Uhh, Levi?" Furlan spoke while looking at the lake. Levi ignored him; instead, he was too busy thinking about Hange to notice she was heading towards him at that very moment.
Mike and Erwin turned to face what Furlan was staring at. Their jaws dropped.
On Lake Sina was the one and only Hange Zoe making her way towards Levi's cabin on a canoe while singing the song "We Belong" by Pat Benatar so loud that everyone in the camp could hear her. She also wore shorts and a camp T-shirt. She did not wear a life jacket.
Talk about romantic.
"Levi!" Mike said urgently and shook his shoulder.
"What?" Levi turned to Mike. He was irritated by his friends messing with him about his crush (yes, he will admit it but not out loud to his nosy friends).
What else did they need now? They could always bother someone else.
Levi noticed where Mike was pointing to and was about to turn in said direction until he heard a voice coming from somewhere behind him.
"Well, it seems like you won't die a virgin after all, huh, shortass? Who knew?"
Levi knew that voice. His cousin, Mikasa, from Cervidae cabin, Levi had the pleasure (not) of watching over at this camp. It was a good thing he did not have to deal with her and her obvious crush on Eren Jaeger. He did feel bad for Rico because she had to deal with that gloomy brat in her cabin.
Levi turned around to face his cousin. She was standing a few feet away from him with a few of her friends that he recognized. The tall, brunette one with her hair in a ponytail, Sasha, also from Cervidae cabin, was eating a sandwich (she probably got it from the camp across the lake). She must have raided Camp Marley recently.
(They have a chef there who can apparently make really delicious food. Levi only knew because Hange planned on kidnapping him one time just to try some).
Mikasa's other friend, Historia, the short blonde-haired girl from Lynx cabin, smiled pleasantly at Levi.
"What are you talking about, brat?" he glared at Mikasa.
Historia giggled and pointed in the direction of the lake. "Over by the lake. Can't you hear Hange singing? I knew she could sing, but wow! I wonder if she is singing to a lucky guy? That would be so adorable!"
Levi's eyes widen in surprise. He tuned out Historia's gushing when it hit him.
That means…Hange...oh no.
He turned his head to find that Hange was indeed singing and making her way towards his direction.
His direction!
Erwin and Mike noticed the blush on Levi's face and smirked. Furlan clamped his hand on Levi's shoulder like a proud dad. Levi could hear the smirk in Furlan's voice that he would love to punch away if it weren't for Hange.
"I wonder who the guy is too, Historia. He is indeed a lucky guy."
Levi shook Furlan off and started heading towards Hange.
Hange noticed Levi coming closer and stops rowing. She dropped her oar off to the side.
"Hey! Levi!" She yelled out loud while waving her arms around.
She did not have to yell so loudly, though. The sound traveled perfectly from her mouth and into Levi's ear within seconds because of the lake.
He began speed walking towards Hange.
There was a voice in the background yelling something about how Hange was doing great so far. It sounded like Nifa, but Levi was too busy to check. He needed to get to Hange first.
Levi watched as Hange accidentally drops her oar into the lake when she moved back to row some more. Hange, scrambling to retrieve it, said an "I got it!" in her normal voice until she accidentally tripped and fell into the lake.
She was not wearing a life jacket on either.
Levi stopped speed walking and ran towards Hange. Once he was close to the lake, and without thinking, he took off his shirt and dove into the lake to save Hange.
---
Also a few minutes ago
"I know Hange is a smart girl and all, but wouldn't it have been easier to just walk around the lake to confess to Levi?" Nanaba asked aloud as she took a sip from her water bottle. Some sweat dripped down her brow from being out in the sun all day.
Nanaba sat on the steps of her cabin (Alces) while her campers was out and about. Her cabin was next to Hange's, and she even helped Hange prepare before her big love confession.
Rico, who walked by earlier to see why Nanaba was staring at the lake, sighed from Nanaba's right. "Love does weird things to you, Nanaba. Remember when Mike confessed to you last year? I wonder why do people from this camp confess while using the lakes, though?" She questioned while recalling that one rumor and how Mike confessed to Nanaba by bringing her to a picnic near Lake Maria.
Nanaba laughed and turned to Rico while wiggling her eyebrows. She grinned like the Cheshire Cat. "So when are you going to get a canoe across the lake and confess to Ian?" she said while gesturing to Hange, who was still singing to Levi.
Rico blushed and elbowed Nanaba's side. "Shut up! I do not like Ian like that! Mind your own business!" She turned away from Nanaba and crossed her arms in front of her chest. Her face was still red.
Nanaba turned back to watch Hange sing and rests her chin on the palm of her hand. Her elbow was resting on her thigh. "Mhmm. Go tell yourself that."
"I think it's a cute idea. It would be very boring and tiresome to walk around the lake just to confess. Serenading on the lake is much more unique." Nifa, counselor of Tamias cabin, piped up from Nanaba's left. She had heard Hange's singing nearby and was curious about what was going on. She sat next to Nanaba. It seemed like Nanaba knew what was going on.
Ah. It seemed that Nifa also joined in on the watch party, Nanaba thought. Now a good chunk of the camp was curious about Hange's business.
The trio watched as Hange rowed closer to Levi. This time, some of the campers from the other cabins watched Hange from Levi's side. They did not stand close but a far distance instead. They were curious about what was going on and did not want to get too close to suffer from Levi's wrath.
They all watched as Levi stood up from his spot and began speed walking towards the lake. Meanwhile, Hange continued to sing her song.
Nifa brought her hands up to her face and cupped them around her mouth to amplify her voice.
"You're doing great, sweetie!"
Hange was doing great. Indeed, she was almost at her destination. All she had to do was pick up the oar and go back to rowing…
Until she accidentally dropped her oar, causing Levi to start running towards her.
They could not hear what Hange said, but they could assume she was trying to reassure Levi that she was ok and to retrieve the oar...until she misstepped and fell into the lake.
Oops.
Nanaba and Rico turned to Nifa with a shocked look. Nifa held her hands up in innocence.
"I swear. I did not mean or intend for all of that to happen."
"We have to help Hange!" Nanaba yelled. Both she and Rico stood up to try to help Hange but stopped by Nifa, grabbing the back of their shirts.
"What are you doing, Nifa?" Nanaba said with irritation. Nifa did not say anything but nodded her head towards the lake. She lets go of their shirts after they brought their attention to the lake too.
The girls watched as Levi took his shirt off and dove into the lake to save Hange.
Problem solved.
"Doesn't Levi know that Hange is a good swimmer?" Nifa asked from behind Nanaba.
Rico scoffed. "You tell me. I always have to train for the swimming competitions, but I can never beat her." Rico always dreaded when her cabin was put up against Hange’s. She usually placed at either second or third place. No one could outswim Hange, not even Levi.
They watched as Levi grabbed Hange, threw her over his shoulder, and made his way back to his cabin. The onlookers made a path for him because they were too scared to focus on Levi.
The girls sighed with relief. This was practically a typical day at Camp Paradis.
Nanaba turned to Rico and Nifa. "Anyone up for a snack at the dining hall?"
After everything they just saw, Rico and Nifa both nodded in agreement.
---
"Is the cabin empty?" Hange asked from behind the bathroom door. It has been an hour since the incident. Levi had dragged her into his cabin, and he threw her into his bathroom. He also gave her some of his extra set of clothes and demanded that she took a bath before she gets sick.
Each cabin has two bathrooms, so each camper only had to share with one person. Levi shoved Hange into his/Eren's bathroom while he took a shower in Jean/Connie's. Hange freshened up and clean, stood stationary behind the bathroom door. She practically smelled like Levi. From the soap, she used to the clothes she wore. They all smelled like the definition of clean.
"Yes." That was all Levi replied with a slightly irritated tone in his voice.
Hange groaned from behind the door and rested her forehead on the hardwood. That was the voice Levi would use when he was ready to lecture her. She leaned her head back and placed her hand on the doorknob. She took a deep breath as she opened the door and met Levi's expecting face. His eyebrows were furrowed slightly, he had his arms crossed over his chest, and he looked a bit irritated.
(Hange was thankful that he was dressed similarly to her and she did not walk out to see him shirtless)
She walked towards Levi, sitting on his bed. Each cabin is big enough for each camper to have a total of four beds. Each footstep was like a walk of shame for Hange. Yet, Levi did not say a word. He spoke up the moment she sat down next to him on the bed. The bed shifted down slightly from the extra weight.
"Hange, what were you thinking? You did not have a life jacket on, and you fell in the middle of the lake. You scared a lot of the camp and me. Be careful next time you pull something like that," He said while facing her, concern laced in his voice.
Hange rubbed the back of her neck nervously. She looked up to meet Levi's steel-gray eyes.
"I'm sorry I worried everyone, Levi. I will be more considerate next time. Although…"
Hange began to chuckle to herself at the memory of Levi umping in to save her.
"You know I'm a good swimmer, right?" She placed her hand on Levi's shoulder and shook it slightly. "I would have made it back just fine-"
She stopped shaking his shoulder and sets it down on her lap. "I appreciate you umping in to save me, though." She said with a grin.
Suddenly, Hange raised her hands and leaned forward. She wrapped both of her arms around Levi's midsection and pulled him close to her body for a hug. She rested her head on his shoulder.
"Thank you, Levi."
Levi prayed that Hange could not feel his heart pounding against his chest or see him blush. His crush was close to him, for crying out loud!
He moved his arms to hug Hange back. He could feel nervousness rising up in his body along with his rapid heartbeat. This is it. He will confess to Hange now, and it does not matter if he gets rejected or not. She had to know, even if the song she sang was for someone else.
Levi leaned back from Hange, but he maintained the hug. Their faces were only a few inches away from each other.
"Hange, I have something to tell you. I need you to hear me out for a few minutes."
Hange nodded in agreement. "Ok…" she said with some uncertainness. She was unsure what he was going to say, and he gave her the most serious look on his face. He stared deeply into her amber-brown eyes.
"I appreciate you."
Huh?
Hange tilted her head in confusion. "Come again, Levi."
Levi looked away and sighs. Ok. That was not a rejection. He just has to change tactics to get it to Hange and hopefully not make it sound awkward. Levi had no experience with him confessing before. Other girls had confessed to him, but it was with material stuff. He wanted to use words for his confession.
Levi looked up again and stared into Hange's eyes again. "I want to dedicate my heart to you." Ok, now that sounded a bit too much.
Levi continued speaking anyway before he could change tactics again.
"I just want to say that I like you, Hange." He said sincerely. "I like listening to you talk, your personality, and your humor. I want you to at least be aware before we go to college and if the song from earlier is not for me."
Levi stared at Hange's face and attempted to read her emotions. Her eyes widened with shock, and her mouth was open in a small o. She stayed that way for a few minutes until the shock became full-on laughter.
Hange was laughing at him.
She let go of Levi and threw her head back. Her face was full of delight.
Usually, Levi would not mind listening to her laugh, even if it was at him. It was one of his favorite sounds to her, not that she needed to know that.
However, this is different from before. Levi frowned but did not make a move to stand up. He needed an explanation for this.
Hange turned back to Levi after she calmed down a bit. "Levi." She said. Her voice had some laughter evident in her voice. Here comes the rejection.
"The song was for you."
What?
Levi only blinked in response. Hange began to swing her legs a bit and placed her hands on her lap. "I wanted to confess to you today, and I thought what serenade you from the lake." She explained.
"I guess I was too excited to miss some necessities. Sorry about that, by the way."
She leaned forward to grab Levi's right hand. Levi made no move to remove it, so she interlocks their fingers together.
"But you beat me to it, huh, Levi?" She chuckled while staring down fondly at their hands.
Levi stared at their hands as well. He could not believe this. They were going to confess to each other on the same day.
Suddenly, Levi leaned forward to rest his head on Hange's shoulder. "Will you be my girlfriend, Hange?"
Hange turned to Levi in shock. Levi moves his head to meet her eyes. The eyes he adores.
Hange smiled at him. Her eyes glowed with happiness. "Yes." That was enough for Levi.
He let go of Hange's hand and placed it on the back of her head. He grasped her hair a bit but not rough at all.
Hange watched as Levi leaned closer.
And closer.
And closer.
Until they were a few centimeters apart. The cabin was quiet except for their breathing. Both of their breaths fanned each other's faces.
"What are you doing, Levi?" Hange asked with a hint of curiosity. She made no move to pull away, so Levi took it as a sign to explain his motives.
"Can I kiss you?"
Hange blinked a few times before nodding her head to give Levi an ok.
Levi closed the gap between the two. It was a short and sweet kiss. There heat or desire to move their relationship up to another base.
They leaned back from the kiss with a happy look on their faces. Hange had a goofy grin while Levi smiled at her. It was rare to see Levi smile, and Hange was delighted to be a source for it.
"That was my first kiss," Hange confessed.
"Mine too." Levi chuckled. His hand was still gripping Hange's hair. He kept his grip as he elated back on the bed, bringing Hange down with him.
"Levi!" Hange exclaimed and sat up on her elbows. Who knew Levi was so bold?
"What if the other campers see us?" She said with some nervousness.
Levi rolled his eyes and lightly flicked Hange's forehead. "We are not having sex. I'm just tired, and I want to take a nap with my girlfriend."
He smirked. "Besides, I sent my campers over to Furlan's cabin. They won't come back until we have to go to bed."
Hange looked at him suspiciously while rubbing her forehead from earlier. "You promise?"
Levi nodded his head. "I promise."
Hange let out a small yawn. It has been a long day. She moved so she can lay her body to the spot next to Levi. Meanwhile, Levi turned over to face his nightstand, so he can set his alarm for them to wake up before dinner. He then picked up the blanket and placed it over both of their bodies. They were both facing the wall.
"Sleep well, Hange." He spooned her from behind and placed a small kiss on the back of her neck.
Hange smiled before getting comfortable in Levi's arms. "Goodnight, Levi."
The two spent a few minutes in silence and tranquility. Levi was happy to spend some quality time with his dream girl.
“Hey, Levi. Use that dedicate your heart line for when you propose.” He can hear the smugness in Hange’s voice.
He lightly kicked her on the shin. “Go to sleep.”
Hange could not see it, but Levi had a small smile on his face as he drifted off to sleep.
---
"I KNEW IT!!!" Nanaba yelled while standing up and pointing at the new couple walking into the dining hall holding hands. Erwin and Mike were startled by the sudden outburst. Furlan was smirking victoriously. His friend, Isabel, rolled her eyes at Furlan's smirk.
(Petra, Nifa, Moblit, and Rico were sitting at another table noticed the couple at the doorway. Nifa and Petra squealed in delight while Rico and Moblit smiled. The other girls from Hange's cabin squealed as well since they secretly shipped her with Levi).
Levi and Hange stopped walking. Hange started laughing behind her free hand, and Levi gave Nanaba an annoyed look.
Everyone stopped eating to turn to the source of the sound. Nanaba, noticing the multiple stares, rubs the back of her head nervously and laughs. "Sorry about that, go back to eating."
Furlan smirked as Levi and Hange passed by the usual table to get some food. He turned to Isabel sitting next to him. He stuck his hand out to her and moved his fingers in pay-up motion. "Pay up, Isabel. I won the bet."
Isabel stuck out her tongue at him. "If only Levi-Bro waited until the end of the summer. I would have won 50 bucks," she said while reluctantly handing Furlan 50 dollars.
Furlan hummed in content and pocketed the money in his shorts pocket. "Appreciate the business, Izzy. Now, are you willing to put down money for when Levi and Hange get married?" He said and held his hand out for a handshake to seal the agreement.
Isabel smirked and shook Furlan's hand in agreement. "You're on, Furlan. We'll discuss this later." She turned away from Furlan and smiles at the couple coming to their table. "The new couple is coming here now."
"Hi everyone!" Hange beamed after sitting down across from Furlan. Levi sat between Hange and Nanaba.
Everyone at the table said hi in reply.
Erwin pushed his finish tray slightly on the table in front of him and turned to Hange. "Congratulations, Hange and Levi. I hope the two of you have a happy relationship."
Nanaba and Mike smiled as well. "Congrats, Levi," said Nanaba.
"Congrats, Hange," said Mike.
"I knew you could do it. Levi-Bro! You have had a crush on Hange since forever!" Isabel exaggerated the word forever.
Levi blushed, and Furlan smirked. He turned to Hange. "Say, Hange. How many kids-"
"Don't even finish that sentence, Furlan." Levi threatened, yet his face was still red from blushing. He did not want Furlan to bring up the conversation about children from earlier today.
Hange laughed from the interaction and leaned down to kiss Levi on the cheek. "Don't worry about him, Furlan." She leaned down towards his ear.
"We can discuss the number of children we would have later." She winked at him and went back to eating as if nothing happened between the two. Meanwhile, Levi opened his mouth slightly in shock. He did not expect that out of Hange! Mike, Erwin, and Furlan chuckled at this.
Nanaba (who luckily did not hear Hange) still noticed Levi's shock. "Levi, close your mouth before some flies get in." she lectured to him in a motherly tone. This broke Levi out of his shock, and he goes back to focus on eating.
Everyone continued talking and sharing any recent stories they had. Suddenly, Hange slammed her hands down on the table, shocking everyone at the table. She turned to face Levi.
"Levi! Where is Mikasa? We need to tell her about us!" She exclaimed and shook Levi's shoulders.
Oh, right. Hange would want to tell Mikasa about her new relationship since she saw Mikasa as family. Plus, they will most likely be an actual family in the future. Levi raised his hands up to grab Hange's and set it down on her lap. "Stop, Hange. She's probably eating with Eren and Armin. We can tell her later."
Erwin raised his eyebrows in confusion. "Actually, Levi. I haven't seen Mikasa ever since she showed up with Sasha and Historia. Isabel put her utensils down and joined in on the conversation.
"I saw her with Eren and Armin an hour before dinner. They were sitting together deep in a conversation…"
Levi looked up to scan his eyes across the dining hall. He noticed Armin's blonde hair sitting at his regular table with his friends. He sat at a table with Jean, Connie, Sasha, Ymir, and Historia. He noted how Armin noticed his stare and looked away as if he was scared of him.
Mikasa and Eren were nowhere in sight.
---
Bonus:
"Be careful, Eren!"
Mikasa said while raising her voice slightly. She did not want to yell, or else she might alert anyone in the forest.
"I'll be fine, Mikasa," he assured her. "I can feel it! Bigfoot is nearby." He said with excitement.
"This is the last time, Eren. We are already missing dinner, and who knows if Armin can stall for us any longer. Levi is going hunt us down. Plus, I don't want to end up in Camp Marley again."
Mikasa and Eren only had a few snacks on them. Mikasa managed to slip into her cabin to grab some from Sasha's secret stash. Sasha and Historia were busy watching the chaos at the lake.
"I promise, Mikasa. Thank you for coming with me. I don't think I can do this alone." He turned back to Mikasa with a big grin. He was also recalling the time he was searching in the forest to find Bigfoot and ran into an angry Hange instead,
Mikasa smiled in return, and the two continued their search to find Bigfoot.
Meanwhile, the two did not realize that they passed a figure watching them from a reasonable distance away behind a tree. Its eyes watched as the two humans continued their search. It slipped away sneakily into the darkness. It went away from Camp Paradis and towards the forest near Camp Marley instead.
---
Some quick notes:  
I kinda based this fic off of one scene from Pitch Perfect 2 and other summer camp-related movies I watched (I don't have much knowledge of summer camp 😭)
Cabin names are based on scientific names of different animals
I hc Hange being good at swimming. Let's face it. If she can swim down a river while carrying a 65 kg man, and miraculously not get any gunshot wounds (not counting a spike in adrenaline to live); I'm sure Hange is a good swimmer.
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