#lissa talks

[kingofbodyrolls]

So… yesterday, I received an email from AO3, and I’ve been crying ever since. Perhaps it’s silly—this flood of emotion over a comment, a review—but it felt like a light cutting through the fog. You see, I’ve been slowly coming to terms with the idea that maybe I shouldn’t write fanfiction anymore, and yet… this single moment of kindness warmed my heart in ways I can’t quite describe 🥹🫂

It doesn’t take much to move me; just a few words can brighten my day, lift me up from the quiet doubts that linger. That’s why I, as a writer, keep yearning for comments and reviews—not out of vanity, but out of a simple question: Do you even like my stories? Should I keep going? Without an echo to my words, with only silence or the faintest of replies, the answer feels like a quiet, heavy no.

And it stings. It really does. That’s why I haven’t been here much. Because if I’m being honest? It hurts. But still, it’s okay. I look back at everything I’ve written, and my heart swells with pride. These stories have been my solace, my healing, my way of pouring out hurt, sadness, pain, and trauma—and transforming them into characters who struggle, grow, and, in the end, find comfort. Writing has always been my way of giving myself a hug—a quiet reminder that everything will be okay. And it will. I know that.

Maybe I’ll keep writing, not fanfiction, but something just for me. Something I’ll tuck away, like a secret world where my heart can wander freely.

I know this all sounds a bit dramatic, and maybe it is—after all, it’s Christmas Day here, and nothing has gone quite the way I hoped. And so, here I am, sitting on Tumblr with tears in my eyes. But I needed to say this:

Thank you.

Thank you for being here. Thank you for reading my stories. Thank you for existing. Each and every one of you means more to me than you’ll ever know.

I wish you the warmest, most peaceful Holiday season, and may it be filled with love, light, and little moments that heal🎄💜

[my-dear-dr]

I legitimately nearly died last month buT I SURVIVED AND GOT TO SEE GARASHIR GO CANON LIFE IS WORTH LIIIVIIINNGGGGG

[kingofbodyrolls]

Okay. Wow. Just—WOW.

This post? It’s the kind of thing that needed to be said so freaking much! Like, can we get this plastered on a billboard or something? Because yes! 🙌

Even though I constantly tell myself, "Write for you, it’s about your joy, your creativity," there’s still this little part of me (okay, maybe a big part of me 😅) that craves feedback. Like— "Am I doing good?" "Does this even make sense?" "Is anyone out there on this big spinning globe finding comfort in my words?"

There’s something almost magical about the idea that someone halfway across the world might read something I wrote and think, "Wow, this hits me right in the feels." 😭✨

And honestly? Sometimes I sit there and wonder if readers really get how much their feedback means to us writers. It’s not just a “nice-to-have”—it’s the fuel that keeps the creative engine running. It’s the sparkly dopamine boost that says, "Yes, keep going! Your words matter!" 💕

So, yeah. This post? Absolute chef’s kiss. Let’s all shout it from the rooftops: feedback matters, and it’s one of the beautiful things that keeps us motivated to keep spilling our hearts onto the page. 🖤

Dear fanfic writers, your need to get VALIDATION for your creativity is VALID

Look, there is no gun to our heads and no one is making us put our blood, sweat and tears into these stories we're writing. But look at it this way, we're human too and everyone likes to get compliments.

Writing for self enjoyment is the goal but don't feel bad for craving more support, hits, kudos, comments, etc. Just because it's fanfiction doesn't mean it's less mentally stressful to do, and it sure doesn't make the stories mean less to us as writers.

Our work is rich and awesome too and we deserve a good pat on the back for it. We deserve to get acknowledgement and credit for it🤝

[lillifaba]

Last night Jennifer Newberry got stuck in the bubble during the curtain call. Luckily, her cast members and the backstage crew had her back (x)

[kingofbodyrolls]

Me—who swore up and down I’d never write another series. (Not because I don’t adore them—seriously, I do! But let’s face it, they just… don’t perform as well as I’d like? And I get all in my feels about it. 🥲)

Anyway! Guess what my brain decided was a fantastic idea to do next? That’s right, folks: Songs of the Heart. 🥹

This was supposed to be a cute little one-shot. Maybe two shots at most. But, noooo, these characters had opinions. They demanded more—so much more. And I caved. Because of course I did. So now we’re doing it. A brand-new series is coming your way! 🥳

✨ Pretty, sparkly, PLEADING eyes here ✨: Please, please show it all the love when it drops! Comment, hype, scream into the void, throw confetti—whatever floats your boat. This one might actually (probably? most likely?) be the last series I ever do. Let’s send it off with a bang, yeah? 💥

Oh, and guess who’s about to make their glorious debut: MUSE Jimin? 🤧 Yup. It’s happening. I’m emotional already. Also—here’s a sneak peek at my extremely chaotic, spoiler-heavy scribbled notes ✍️. (Don’t look too close, or do, but no promises you won’t be spoiled 👀)

Once I’ve wrapped everything up in a neat little bow (or, well, a bow with vibes—we’ll see), I’ll drop all the juicy details: teasers, release dates, schedules—the works. But until then, it’s just us, a little chaos, and a lot of anticipation.

Take care, my lovely readers. Stay amazing, stay hyped, and stay tuned. 🫂💜

[my-dear-dr]

I went on a date recently where the guy kept trying to bite my ear in public and all I could think of was this pic

[kingofbodyrolls]

This is like seeing myself 🫣🥹

People always think I'm weird for writing like that... I have so many notebooks and notes laying about with scribbles of storyline and plot 🥹

This was so nice to see, that I'm not the only one who works like that 🥹✨💜

Here are the draft notebooks for most of my novels. I write out the first draft by hand, and if it's a graphic novel, I do layout sketches in the same notebook. These stay on my desk and are referenced throughout the book-making process.

I make notes to myself along the lefthand page (a technique I borrowed from Garth Nix), which I regularly read through for ideas I had in the moment but may have forgotten in the day to day work or writing.

I like drafting longhand because once I type the story up, I tend to make subsequent revisions in the same document. This preserves a record of how the story started. Plus, a notebook is easier to carry around than a laptop, and no worries about charging!

[sieglinde-freud]

let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!

[anotherbummer]

"I need to remember you." "Well does it work?" "...Once"

Bonus +

[kingofbodyrolls]

It still shocks me sometimes that I wrote this song when I was just 13. Yes, you read that right—these lyrics are that old. While I did translate them from Danish to English and give the words a little polish, the core of it remains untouched. But the pain that teenage me was singing about? Honestly, I don’t even remember what I was going through back then. 😂

It's funny how time distorts things—how a song written in youthful anguish can still echo in the present, even though the exact hurt is a blur. Yet, here it is, a piece of my past, still resonating with me... and maybe with you too.

As time passes, The hole in my heart Grows wider, deeper— A void I cannot fill. I miss you so much. When will you come back to me? Losing you Was a loss too great to bear. Now, I drift through the days, Not knowing what I’m doing, Or why I’m even here. I close my eyes, Whispering into the dark, Hoping you’ll return. But the black hole within me spreads, Swallowing the light. Is there anything I can do?

Why? Why? Tears trace their path down my cheeks, A quiet, endless rain. This is how it is—every day. I try to find myself again, But I am lost without you. Why was it you— And not me? Now, as I look at myself, Through the mirror of what has been, I’ve learned to accept. The pain softens, Though it lingers still. I think of you always, Still wish it was me instead of you. Yet I feel your voice in the wind, Your warmth in the sun’s embrace. You would want me to be myself again, To live as though you walk beside me, Every step of the way. It’s hard— I miss you more than words can hold. Knowing you won’t come back Cuts deeper than the sea. But still, I face each day with a smile, For your sake. And I will keep smiling, Until the day we are reunited, When this hole in my heart Will finally be whole again.

[nerdasaurus1200]

As much as the show has been illustrating the parallels between Viren and Callum, I’m still so glad they emphasized a big difference between the two- the way they treat their partners.

Cause although Viren’s heart was in the right place, the way he treated Lissa was nothing short of abusive and horrific. He didn’t just stand there and let his own wife cry, he took advantage of her tears.

And meanwhile Callum just hears Rayla crying and rushes to her aid, because he can’t stand to just leave her crying alone. He’ll always help her and dry her tears for her, no matter the reason.

[tategaminu]

It doesn't matter that Viren had his heart in the right place ASSAULT is not okay and Lissa had all the rights to leave. Viren and Callum have parallels but they are different in a lot of ways one being that he would never do something like that to Rayla and in a similar situation they would have talked about it. The narrative and Viren himself knows what he did wasn't okay you don't need to justify abuse. You can love a character and aknowledge they aren't a good person in canon.

[mylifeisjustafeverdream]

I truly do not care what Richelle may or may not have said, but Dimitri Belikov is NOT a fucking Sagittarius. He's a Capricorn. Caps are defined by practicality, steadiness, and initiative. They are highly motivated planners who tightly control their lives to reach their end goal. They're very disciplined, and highly self critical. They're so contained they seem aloof, but this energy of being an unmovable force is alluring. Think of a rock formation in a raging ocean. So they get placed in leadership roles especially in crisis. Who the fuck does that sound like???

[kingofbodyrolls]

NINE PEOPLE I’D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW BETTER

Thanks for the tag @oddinary4bts✨

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LAST SONG -> D-Day by Agust D. This song has been on my ‘current favs’ since it came out lol, but yeah, the song just really resonates with me 🥹

FAV COLOUR -> purple 💜 (but honestly, I love all colors in general!)

CURRENTLY WATCHING -> I’m rewatching Supernatural. I dropped it around season 12 or 13, so I’m starting from the beginning. I’m also watching ‘Yet to Come in Busan’ (a go to whenever I’m feeling down) and also In the Soop. Yeah, I watch multiple things depending on my mood, lol.

SPICY/SWEET/SAVOURY -> both savory and sweet, and it’s even better if it’s sour!

RELATIONSHIP STATUS -> married (we’ve been together for 12 years 🫣)

CURRENT OBSESSION -> well, BTS and Jimin, also just listening to music, dancing and then tending to my garden and greenhouse 🌱 And of course writing, currently my series ‘My Heart’s Home’ has become almost an unhealthy obsession for me lol 😪

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Tagging: @hoseoksluna @btsgotjams27 @jeonsbabygirlsworld @remmykinsff @gimmethatagustd @joonsmagicshop @gimeow @bratkook and @letjungcoook7

NINE PEOPLE I’D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW BETTER

Thanks for the tag @wintaerbaer and @msnanu✨

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LAST SONG -> The Planet by BTS bc I’ll never stop supporting the tannies (I was listening to BTS on shuffle driving home haha)

FAV COLOUR -> light green

CURRENTLY WATCHING -> Demon Slayer and The Gentleman. I still haven’t finished Itaewon Class either whoops

SPICY/SWEET/SAVOURY -> spicy and savoury. Very rarely sweet haha

RELATIONSHIP STATUS -> I’ve been dating my bf for almost a year (on and off lmao)

CURRENT OBSESSION -> well BTS and Jungkook are still up there. Other than that, there’s Helldivers 2 (for my gamer girls out there) and my fic Chasing Cars (I think about this fic 100% of the time help)

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Tagging: @magicshopaholic, @casuallyimagining, @jessikahathaway, @moonleeai, @btsmosphere, @park-jimin-isnt-real, @moccahobi, @daesukiii and @kingofbodyrolls

[kingofbodyrolls]

For this rainbow, I finally picked up my professional camera again. The last images stored there tells me that the last time I used it was the 1st of December 2023. Wild. But I picked it up thanks to this pretty rainbow, which was actually a double rainbow. So pretty. This image is made up of three into a panorama shot, and Lightroom was a bit funky with putting them together, so please don't mind the badly processed house in the middle; no, we're not looking at that 😂

For people who want a wall of text status update, it's under the cut.

How are you all doing? I'm hanging in there. Not active much, but I still haven't gotten myself into deleting my tumblr app. So I still see and get all your notifs, even if I don't reply right away! I'm still taking time off, trying to figure out what I want to do with the blog for the future... I have not written a fanfic in some time now, but I have two finished stories that are ready to be published, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure about a lot of things these days... I've had dark days, written a lot of sad and dark poems (that will go on my sub blog some time in the future), and I've begun to write an original story. It's really fun; about magic, witches and mages; about good and evil and all the gray in between. It will probably bore you, but it's fun to write, even though I don't think anyone would read it except for a few friends (even though this thing might be the longest thing I'll write, turning into either two or three books lol).

Serotonin boost I get happy when I get notifs with comments and/or reblogs of my stories; it really touches my heart. To be honest, this is why I left/taking time off. I've always felt that interaction was low, and my stupid brain will not let me stop comparing myself to others, so it slowly killed my drive for writing and posting. If no one interacts, what's the point of posting? If no one interacts, what's the point of writing? But I love writing, and it's one of my creative outlets, so I couldn't let that go completely, hence I started writing original stories instead; no ones gonna read them anyway, but I can still play with characters, world building and storytelling. Those are the things I loved about fanfics---and I still do, don't get me wrong. But I feel so discouraged being on here. But I'm happy to know that a few people still care.

The Downfall This also made it quite hard for me to read; because I felt so unmotivated... I haven't read much this month at all. I tried to read a fanfic this Monday, didn't finish it and haven't picked it up since. Honestly, I've just been watching documentaries because I'm in a (tumblr) slump. I feel drained though; I feel like I've given so much, and I love it. I love making people happy, leaving lovely reviews, and it's as much for myself as it is for making another person happy---but to be honest, it has drained me. I know I shouldn't ask for anything in return, but I feel imbalanced. Like I'm not being filled with much love, if that makes sense? I don't really feel appreciated, but don't get me wrong, I don't feel hated (yeah, I'm so good at being black and white), sorry---I know I sound very pessimistic. But you guess have always been so kind to me, and I love you a lot, and I have a few super lovely mutuals and friends that are lovely internet friends that I adore, so I wanted to be real with all of you. You can hate me for it if you want to. Go ahead.

I don't think I'm going to make a recommend list this month. I haven't really read anything, so it'll be really small. And I don't like the pressure of it anymore... which is why for a long time I've thought about not doing them anymore. Maybe some day I will again in the future. But I'd still love to make rec list on the member's birthdays! And I think this will help me, take some pressure off myself (that I've created myself), so I'll still read and rec, it will just be slower---whenever I feel like it, and not because I have to read to make a monthly rec list. This isn't my job, I'm not getting paid doing all of this, and the amount of time I've been spending on both reading and writing is more than 37+ hours a week, sooo. I have to slow down.

A part of me thinks that I flew too fast, too high and too close to the sun, lol. I'm still gonna be here, you can still send in asks for rec list or whatever you want, all is welcome (except hate, because then I'll simply just delete my blog, my mental health can't take that).

To post, or not to post? Should I post the two stories that I have? Both of them are for the series Friendcation.

And for the unfinished mermaid stories I still have left, I hope I'll finish them in the future; when, I don't know. Maybe one day I'll feel love for them again, to finish them. I have them all planned out, but like I mentioned before, with low interaction, I'm really not motivated to finish them, even though part of me really want to for the like five people that are so sweet and invested, and always comments and reblogs (you guys know who you are, and I love you so fucking much 🥰).

To all the stories I'll probably never write...

I still have some other unfinished but planned stories, and I'm gonna list them here, just for the hell of it. Don't know if people would have found them interesting anyway, but here goes:

Words on a Page (a Namjoon x reader, idol!au where reader is a fanfiction writer and interviewer for a magazine and has to interview BTS). Author's comment: probably never gonna write it. It has been done before, and it was just a very very silly dream I had.

Songs of The Heart (a Jimin x reader, musician!au where Jimin is a single father and reader moves into the house next to his, hear his lonely songs etc, they meet, talk, very angsty, sad and nostalgic and 'Who' coded). Author's comment: this idea came to me after listening to 'who' and then thinking about Jimin being my next door neighbor, yeah, that's it. Don't know if this will ever get written.

IT Support (a Jimin x reader, office!au where Jimin is your nerdy coworker, but a freak in the sheets, lol). Author's comment: this has honestly been on my list for years, but I never written anything for it, and I probably never will, even though I've made the banner and all.

I do have a few more, but I've already scraped those, and then there's the four mermaid stories to add to the list. I'm probably mostly excited about the mermaid stories, and those would be my priority if I ever get back into writing fanfiction again.

I swear, I'm almost finished... Okay, this whole thing has gotten incredibly long. Sorry. Before I end this post, I just want to say how happy and grateful I am to each and everyone of you. I've met some incredible nice people on here, some really caring ones. I'll never forget that. And I'll never forget each wonderful and lovely comment, some people have really helped me, motivated me when I felt low, and when I wanted to stop writing a few months back. Thank you. I kept going, and I wish I could keep going for you, making something special, for the special people I met here. I actually really wanted to do requests for you guys in hopes that it would motivate me into writing, but I just don't know. I still want to give so much back to the people who have hyped me up, so I'm going to tag a few of you lovely people--- if you have a request for a story, you're welcome to message me or send me an ask. I don't know if or when I'll write it, but in case I get a bit of motivation, I have some things I could write from, so if you want to, you can send me a request (just keep in mind the story will probably be a one-shot from 10-20k max or maybe shorter, lol, you never know with me). You don't have to send me a request, I simply want to give back to some lovely people. I wish I could hug you.

@letjungcoook7 @honeybloomyyyy @babystarcandyjk97 @minpdrecs @bobathi @allie-is-a-panda @back2bluesidex @gimeow @antisocial-mochi267

These are but just a few of the people that have supported me on there, either by commenting, reblogging, ask, messaging--you name it. I could list many others, and one day I might make a post celebrating all mt lovely mutuals, that means a lot to me. Thank you for interacting; you've (as long with others) helped me when times were tough. Thank you.

I had actually planned to open a "recommend a fic" section/box, but I'm not sure about that. I still have so many fics on my to read list, and right now I don't want to pile more onto it. Might do it in the future, when I've finally made it through my own lists.

Okay, I have to end this post for real now.

I'm still on tumblr, I still have my app. I deleted my discord app on my phone, but I'm still part of the servers I was before, I'm just not active. It's better for me that way right now, because it all got to be too much. I was just reminded of how much of a failure I feel like (no, we're not getting into that not, store it away). But you can always contact me here. I'm lurking sometimes. I look forward to reading in a more leisurely pace and hopefully not feeling pressured to make the rec lists as I did before (even though just for the completionist in me I want to finish them for just this year, lol).

Okay. If you read this far---thank you, I adore you, I love you, you're nice, keep going 💜

[my-dear-dr]

Desperately waiting for things at my job to calm down so I can have more time to explore sprik fanfic