#lissa talks

[my-dear-dr]

I legitimately nearly died last month buT I SURVIVED AND GOT TO SEE GARASHIR GO CANON LIFE IS WORTH LIIIVIIINNGGGGG

[kingofbodyrolls]

Why I left, and why I’m staying

Before we begin, a gentle warning: this post touches on some heavy topics—self-harm, suicide, childhood trauma, and mental health. If these are tender places for you, please take care of yourself first. You don’t have to read this. You come first. Always.

The breaking

I wish I could say there was one reason I left, one singular thing that cracked me open and made me disappear. But life isn’t that neat, is it? It was everything, all at once—the weight of low engagement, the endless comparisons, the silent echoes in the spaces where I hoped for connection. It was the exhaustion of always lifting others while I crumbled beneath my own hands, the way I’d pour and pour and pour until my cup was bone-dry.

I’ve never been good at putting myself first. So I did something drastic. I erased myself. I deleted my blog. And even though I know I needed to do it, even though I was drowning—it still stings. Because I know I disappointed people. Because I felt like I failed.

But sometimes, you have to lose yourself to find yourself again.

The staying (or at least, the blog is)

Fifteen years. That’s how long my original blog existed (RIP, old friend). It was a part of me, woven into my story. And even when I stepped away, I still felt the pull—the whisper of unfinished business. I missed the good parts, the warmth, the shared love for stories. And most of all, I felt like I owed it to you—to the people who found pieces of themselves in my words—to keep those stories alive, even if I wasn’t always here to tend to them.

I don’t know if I’ll be active. I don’t know if I’ll post new things. The same reasons that made me leave still sit heavy on my chest sometimes. But I’ve learned something in all of this: healing isn’t a straight path. It isn’t a neat little checklist where you wake up one day and—boom!—all better. It’s messy. It’s cyclical. Some days I feel invincible, and some days I feel like a ghost haunting my own life.

I’m staying, but I’m staying on my own terms.

The healing

Here’s the scariest part: I don’t really know who I am. I don’t know where I begin and where my trauma ends. For so long, I’ve been a collection of survival tactics, stitched together with coping mechanisms and old wounds. I’ve been the person who tries to fix everything—people, situations, the cracks in the universe itself—because maybe if I can make others happy, I can be happy too.

But that’s not how healing works.

And I want to heal. I want to love without needing to be needed. I want to give without emptying myself. I want to exist simply because I deserve to exist—not because I think I have to prove my worth to anyone.

In my time away, I rediscovered something that’s been a lifeline: poetry. I wrote my pain into verses, shaped my grief into something tangible, something outside of me. And somewhere in that process, I found a little light. Enough light to choose to stay. Enough light to call my doctor that day instead of following through with a plan I had convinced myself was necessary. Enough light to realize that I don’t actually want to die—I just want the pain to stop.

And now, I want to live. Fully, wholly, authentically. I want to love my husband and my kids the way I needed to be loved as a child. I want to keep giving—but from a place of joy, not from a place of depletion. I want to share, not because I need validation, but because I already know I am enough.

So if I pop in and out, know that it’s not because I don’t care. It’s because I am taking care. Of myself. Of the little girl inside me who deserved softness, but never got it. Of the future version of me who deserves to be whole.

To you, with Love

If you’ve read this far—thank you. Truly.

If you are struggling, if you carry trauma, if your mind feels like a storm you can’t escape—please, please know: you are not alone. Even in a crowded room, even when it feels like no one sees you—I promise, someone does. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I am here (or on Discord, same username).

Please, take care of yourself. Please stay.

The world needs your light.

And I will be back 🌻☀️

[landopiastri]

Listennn I have stayed quiet about my love for Landoscar (re-blogging, tagging, but never posting) however this video, this moment right here put me in a damn chokehold. Look at the way Oscar's eyes drift over Lando's features, taking in his smile, his voice, whatever else has drawn him into the moment. He took the time to pause while they were filming to quietly observe Lando because he was able to drink that man in uninhibited, even though they put the camera on him (he knew they would, even if briefly, and it didn't stop him).

Oscar knows that Lando cares a great deal about the thoughts and opinions of others, and how it affects the way he perceives himself. He must have been thrilled to witness a moment where Lando was able to enjoy the praise of his fans, of children who admire him (as much as Oscar does) with such a pure, joyful, yet bashful smile on his face.

It warmed Oscar's heart that those young fans could see what he sees: kindness. And he had to make sure that Lando knew he felt the same.

Their relationship is so important. In a world soaked in competitiveness, a drive to win, they've softened those edges with something profound and meaningful.

They're slowly (quickly?) manifesting the "we get to grow old together" narrative.

[anotherbummer]

"I need to remember you." "Well does it work?" "...Once"

Bonus +

[lillifaba]

Last night Jennifer Newberry got stuck in the bubble during the curtain call. Luckily, her cast members and the backstage crew had her back (x)

[sieglinde-freud]

let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!

[nerdasaurus1200]

As much as the show has been illustrating the parallels between Viren and Callum, I’m still so glad they emphasized a big difference between the two- the way they treat their partners.

Cause although Viren’s heart was in the right place, the way he treated Lissa was nothing short of abusive and horrific. He didn’t just stand there and let his own wife cry, he took advantage of her tears.

And meanwhile Callum just hears Rayla crying and rushes to her aid, because he can’t stand to just leave her crying alone. He’ll always help her and dry her tears for her, no matter the reason.

[mylifeisjustafeverdream]

I truly do not care what Richelle may or may not have said, but Dimitri Belikov is NOT a fucking Sagittarius. He's a Capricorn. Caps are defined by practicality, steadiness, and initiative. They are highly motivated planners who tightly control their lives to reach their end goal. They're very disciplined, and highly self critical. They're so contained they seem aloof, but this energy of being an unmovable force is alluring. Think of a rock formation in a raging ocean. So they get placed in leadership roles especially in crisis. Who the fuck does that sound like???

[energeticpoltergeist]

Part 1: Mad King's War

Prologue: Diverged History(pages 22-25)

[my-dear-dr]

I went on a date recently where the guy kept trying to bite my ear in public and all I could think of was this pic

[owainbradys]

Rewatched the FEW cutscenes and I want to chew on Owain (Affectionate)

[landopiastri]

Not Leclerc, Gasly, and Hamilton all being disqualified!! Gasly wasn’t even in the top ten. Leave him alone.

What prompted them to investigate Ferrari’s and Alpine’s cars anyway? The random weight test at the end, for Charles and Pierre, measuring Lewis’ planks and finding the thickness to be a bit thinner than regulation?

Obviously there should be reprimand for not double checking, but I feel that should fall on Ferrari amd Alpine as constructors, not on the boys themselves. Clearly if it had been intended to get them on the podium, it wouldn’t have landed them further down the line.

Maybe I’m just new to F1 but idk I think those disqualifications are strange. And unfair.

[wholoveseggs]

Okay, okay it‘s not a request but what do you think would have happened if in "Rules" Klaus wouldn’t have killed the reader?

Do you think Elijah would have came with him because of his siblings?

How do you think the reader would‘ve reacted? Like I‘d be mad at my guy.

Oooh, I love this question… there are so many possibilities!

If Klaus didn’t kill the reader (let’s assume she stayed safely hidden), the sacrifice would still play out as it does on screen. Klaus would promise Elijah he’d return their siblings, and Elijah, loyal to his family, would betray the Salvatores and side with Klaus.

This would devastate the reader. Not only facing her brothers’ relentless “I told you so” (especially Damon) but also questioning her relationship with Elijah and her own judgment. Elijah would feel guilty, torn between his love for her and his family, but before they could address their fractures, Klaus would dagger Elijah and take Stefan, setting up the chaos of season 3.

In season 3, the reader would be on a redemptive path, consumed with guilt over trusting Elijah and focused on getting Stefan back alongside Damon and Elena. Despite rejecting her feelings for Elijah, she’d still be deeply concerned for him. Around this time she would most likely meet Rebekah(I figure they would become great friends or bitter enemies - no in-between lol) and that relationship might also reveal a new perspective on Elijah, further complicating her emotions.

Everything would come to a head once Elijah is undaggered. Damon would inform the reader, warning her to stay away, but she’d struggle with avoiding him. The Mikaelson Ball would be the perfect setting for their confrontation. Polite at first but unraveling as Elijah questions her avoidance and she challenges his betrayal. The tension would be palpable, blending bitterness with lingering affection.

When the reader learns of Esther’s plan, she would face a difficult choice: warn Elijah, risking alienation from her friends and brothers, or let the plan proceed, knowing it could mean the end of the man she still loves.

And that’s why I ended it in season 2 😂 it gets waaaay too complicated and messy...

Thanks for asking!!!

[imminent-danger-came]

Really rotating Claudia and Callum in my mind right now.

Like, they both try to keep the people in their life from leaving. They both are willing to do things some might find unspeakable for the people they care about. Callum's Devotion description in ToX is "I value those close to me more than anyone or anything" and his Liberty description is "I'm beholden to my inner circle, not some silly kingdom."

Then you have Claudia, who decided to leave the baby dragon she thought would be the eventual destruction of humanity to save her brother (which is basically choosing those close to her over the world). You also have her trying to free a great ancient evil to save her dad (which is ALSO her choosing those close to her over the world).

We've already had Callum make the decision to use dark magic for Rayla, so here's why CHET will win-

[sieglinde-freud]

brady fire emblem highkey like a top three awakening character. i love that man. big sweetie pie who cries at flowers blossoming out of a crack oh yeah. guy who sniffles at the sight of a double rainbow on a sunny day like true lovers are back baby!!!!

[ramondiazinlubbock]

can't stop thinking about how vampire academy is a "love story" about rose and dimitri but the entire series is actually about rose's undying devotion to lissa and about how horny she is for lissa drinking her blood