#lila is bald??

[latteandjacks]

Man I like this au x2

This is the first time in months I can draw without a time limit of one hour per day and with a pen instead of my finger/mouse and I think it shows because the anatomy looks less rushed and I actually took the time to draw hands, plus the quality remains mostly intact as there's no re-sends You can also tell I like Kevin and Bob, which is funny because I dislike original Bob a lot

Anyways the au belongs to @zleepysnails, some of these characters belong to @jacenotjason and I'm gonna go hide under a rock because I hate tagging people see you all tomorrow

Close up of the colored ones because I’m proud of how they turned out

Fun fact Bob's one comes from a hispanic ytp(h) about Donkey Kong, still one of the few ytph that aged well

[the-spooky-children]

One of my favourite frames of the SM 4 storyboard

[sneakystorms]

There's something I really appreciate about fictional women who are described as becoming ugly and looking miserable during pregnancy... Especially in historical narratives. It feels cathartic, like a symbolic acknowledgement of the potential danger and horror and trauma of pregnancy. On the physical level, as in pregnancy and birth being dangerous for one's health, on the social level, as a representation of stifling gender roles, on the psychological level, as a reminder of the passage of time... etc etc. I just like it as a counterbalance to the "woman glows with the radiant beauty of nearing motherhood" trope. Just thinking about Lila from the Neapolitan novels and the pregnant women of war and peace (except Natasha's sexistly written epilogue fate)...

[muzzable]

Remember how people who didn't watch Miraculous anymore thought that Shadybug and Claw Noir were an elaborate fandom joke? I bet we could do that.

We could totally Goncharov a wild, ridiculous Season 6 plotline, especially in the spirit of April 1st.

Here are my ideas:

Early on in the season, Adrien/Chat Noir spends a few episodes impersonated by himself from the future. The fact that both have been replaced almost leads to his identity being exposed, but future Chat Noir shows up in the same room as present Adrien and so now people continue thinking he can't be the same person.

Because Cerise has ditched the Lila persona, all three of Lila's unrelated mothers simultaneously report her missing. They eventually join a support group for parents of missing teens, and come to realize they have the same daughter.

Alya and Nino break up. They get back together later in the season. Neither is particularly relevant to the season's overall plotline, and both events happen off-screen with only a passing mention.

In a surprising twist, Cerise is unceremoniously killed off mid-season, and her role as Butterfly Miraculous user is taken over by someone else. The rest of the season is a time travel plot where they try to stop this event, as somehow having Cerise as the villain is better for everyone than this person.

Marinette learns from Lila's moms about her wig-based identities, and becomes increasingly paranoid. She begins trying to yank peoples' hair off, convinced that Cerise faked her death and is in hiding as someone she knows. This culminates in Marinette discovering that Nathalie is actually bald. She immediately drops the search and never mentions wigs again.

It turns out that the Chat Noir that replaced Adrien earlier in the season is from later in the season, as he was trying to prevent Cerise's death.

In the finale, the new Butterfly wielder gets desperate, and orders Nooroo to use his powers, not knowing the consequences of Kwamis using them without holders. This leads to sporadic, unpredictable akumatizations/deakumatizations all throughout Paris. Shockingly, it gives us our first real akumatized Marinette, but it only lasts about a minute.

All of the time travel shenanigans to save Cerise's life ultimately lead to multiple copies of her around Paris. The main one continues being the Butterfly wielder. Three stay with Lila's three moms in sort of a Full House/Three's Company situation, becoming the Lila triplets. Having nothing else to do, the rest become background extras for the show, where they copy and paste the same model but with different hairstyles and eye colors.

[yourlowkeyidiot3]

I can't even begin to explain HOW MUCH I HATE THIS DUDES HAIRCUT

WHY THE FUCK DOES IT LOOK LIKE THAT

HOW DOES ONE EVEN ACHIEVE SUCH HAIRCUT

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS MY GUY, WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL WAS GOING THROUGH YOUR HEAD WHEN GETTING THIS HAIRCUT "Oh I'd look so good with this" ????? NO YOU DON'T YOU LOOK GOOFY AS FUCK. WHAT WAS THE THOUGHT PROCESS??? WHY DID YOU AGREE TO THIS???? WHAT MADE YOU THINK IT'D BE A GOOD IDEA?????? WHAT THE HELL DID LILA EVEN SAW IN THIS GOOFY ASS HAIRCUT??????

If he was born with this I feel bad for you, I can't imagine what it must be like having to live while your hair looks like this. Thank fucks he died so he wouldn't have to continue going this goddamn torture anymore. Yes. Having to live with this cut is fucking torture to me.

I swear to God if he doesn't get his hair changed by the end of ep10 I'll become his biggest hater JUST because of his hair. I don't care if he ends up being an interesting character, good villain, with good lore I'd still hate him if he doesn't change that God forsaken haircut. Yes I hate it that much.

Being forgiven for starting a cult, being a cult leader, child kidnapping & murder and possible manipulation would be easier than being forgiven for this haircut dude. If he somehow dies again then he'd deserve it for daring to come back while his hair looks like this. Seriously let him die so I won't have to look at his fucking hair, let me kill him even.

BEING BALD IS FUCKING BETTER THAN HAVING THIS MONSTROSITY

[cottoncandybitchfuck]

D20 Incorrect quotes PT 3!!!

Fantasy High

Someone to Fabian: You are.. 16 years old Fabian: And that means I can’t say Papa?

Adaine: I’m not judging them for their fashion, I’m judging them for being bitches

Someone to Adaine at some point: A clean room doesn't matter if you're dead

Kristen: Dipped, crucified— what’s the difference?*

Kristen abought Ragh: He feels like a guy that would like sucking dick.

TUC

Pete: I am competent, I am intelligent, and I say booty

Kugrash: Oh… that paper was crunchy

Kingston: I don’t want to hear a white redhead sing

Dr. Lugash: Did your boob just fall off?

Sophia to Pete: You  thought this cat’s name was cummin? That’s cumin– dude, do you not cook?

Neverafter

Rosamund: Why are you standing like that? Gerard: This is my human stance!

Timothy Goose: I can feel my bones! Pib: Meow**

Pinicchio: Bald isn’t a minority

Ylfa: It’s not a neeeew thing, it’s just a baaaaad thing.

Mentopolis

Dan about Conrad: He’s the perfect size to chuck

Burrow’s End

Lila to Jaysohn: *while patting his head* Your head’s a little drum 

Ava: Listen, if I had to be traumatized as a child, then they have to be traumatized too, okay?!

Aabria: “Aabria to Erika: No!”***

Tula: Lila is like a pillow, Jaysohn is more like a curtain rod

*Dipped in this means left, not physically dipped in a substance

**This has context for why it was said, but more important is that the response from a human was not Meow, but instead impeccable timing from a needy cat

***Said when I was dming a minisession with a PC and had to OOC tell my player no

[thepictureofjune]

Nolin Color Theory Pt. 4

— Folge 1056 von beiden Seiten

Eine Orange im Regenmantel (1056):

An Colins letzten Tag am Einstein sehen wir ihn in einem ziemlich bunten Outfit. In erster Linie lässt sich das auch ganz gut damit verbinden, dass er zu Julia fährt, denn Julia ist ja auch irgendwie für ihre farbenfrohe Kleidung bekannt und nach Colins ganzer Misere bis hierher hat er nun endlich wieder etwas, auf das er sich freuen kann. Orange steht in der Symbolik auch für Optimismus und Glück. Obwohl Colin schweren Herzens das Einstein verlässt, tut er dies mit dem Optimismus, dass es ihm in Köln eventuell bald wieder besser gehen wird. 

(little fact: Die Orangen Frucht steht symbolisch wohl für ferne Ziele, sowie für Erneuerung und Wiedergeburt - also: Colin kann in Köln einen Neuanfang starten) 

Warum die Regenmäntel?

Vielleicht gehts nur mir so, aber ich habe auf jeden Fall keinen Regen in dieser Szene erkannt, also gabs eigentlich auch keinen Grund für die Regenmäntel, aber da sie dennoch da sind, können wir sie ja immerhin analysieren. 

Colin trägt über seiner optimistischen Kleidung einen blauen Regenmantel, als er die Treppe runter geht und sich von allen verabschieden muss. Denn dafür steht Blau nämlich auch; für den Abschied und die Trauer, welcher dieser mit sich bringt. Trotz Optimismus und baldigem Neubeginn muss Colin nämlich immerhin noch einiges hinter sich lassen. (Seine Freunde, Noah, etc..) 

Doch Colin ist nicht der einzige im Regenmantel! Denn wir sehen eine Menge an Charakteren in verschiedenen farbigen Mänteln und dabei ist es ganz egal, welcher Charakter welche Farbe trägt, denn es geht um die Farben im Generellen. 

Folgende Farben der Regenmäntel: ein ruhiges Blau, ein sehr tiefes Rot und ein intensives Pink. 

Lemme just:

Noah sucht Ruhe und Gelassenheit bei Colin in Blau. Colin küsst Noah in rot. Noah und Colin starren die Wand an in Blau, Pink und Lila.

Noah selbst verabschiedet sich nicht von Colin, doch wohl die intensivsten Erinnerungen, die mit ihm verbunden sind, übernehmen das für ihn. 

(Another fact: Blau, Rot und Weiß stehen nebeneinander gegenüber von Pink. Bei der Mischung von Blau, Rot und Weiß sollte sich ungefähr Pink ergeben. Pink steht für Liebe und Romantik, beides Dinge, die Colins Zeit am Einstein, sowohl mit Noah, als auch damals mit Julia ausgemacht haben.) 

Noah and that one sweater he always wears in important happy scenes with that one guy he definitely isn't in love with (1056):

Es ist Colins letzter Tag und Noah scheint das absolut nicht zu interessieren und trotzdem zieht er welchen Pulli an? Genau. Den Pulli den wir das erste Mal in 1035, als Noah sich das erste Mal zu Colin ans Bett setzt und ihn fragt, ob sie denn doch noch einen Film zusammen schauen wollen. Es ist auch der Pulli, den Noah anhat, während die beiden gemeinsam die Wand anstarren. 

Es ist also ein Pulli, den wir relativ oft in Verbindung zu schönen Momenten mit Colin gesehen haben, und jetzt trägt Noah ihn an dessen letztem Tag? Zufall? I doubt it. 

Es ist dieser Pulli, in dem sich Noah später in Colins Bett legt und weint, weil er soeben seinen besten Freund verloren hat und er es noch nicht einmal über sich gebracht hat, sich von ihm zu verabschieden. 

Der Pulli, der zu Beginn ihrer Freundschaft getragen wurde, wird nun am Ende dieser wieder einmal getragen. Und obwohl er mit den besten Momenten zwischen den beiden verbunden ist, wird er nun wohl im traurigsten gesehen.

Die Verbindung beider Farben und Szenen:

Colin bereitet sich auf einen Neuanfang vor, Noah denkt an die Vergangenheit. Colin ist jetzt vermutlich endlich bereit loszulassen, hat endlich verstanden, dass Noah wohl doch nichts von ihm will und selbst wenn, würde er das sowieso nie zugeben. 

Noah hingegen vermisst den einzigen Freund, den er bis dahin am Einstein hatte. Er vermisst, was auch immer da zwischen ihm und Colin war. Noah hält fest, Colin lässt los.

— june. 🪐

(dunno why i keep signing these off but we did it the first three, now we keep going)

[autorotation]

polskie opisy w alcie, English descriptions under the cut.

a grayscale comic.

frame 1: the facade of a tysiąclatka type school building; an "Alumni reunion" banner hangs from the windows near the entrance. frame 2: interior corridor: classroom doors, corkboard with pinned notices, bust of the school's namesake. end page 1

a gathering in a glass-fronted room; there's a "Cohort of '82" poster on the door. a dark silhouette stands on the right, a ways back from the door, watching. end page 2

frame 1: a balding, middle-aged guy with a goatee enters the frame from the left, headed toward the glass door and the dark silhouette. frame 2: the beardo is now closer to the dark silhouette; light gleams on its long hair. end page 3

frame 1: front view of the two characters from before: the long-haired brunette and the balding beardo exchange grumpy glances. frame 2: the beardo goes through several surprised expressions, exclaiming "Woźniak!"; the woman eyes him distrustfully. frame 3: the beardo goes on: "Boguszewski. Rafał. You look great.", the woman seems less tense. end page 4

frame 1: both characters silhouetted against the glass door. the beardo says "Just remind me what your name was.", the woman replies: "… Lila." frame 2: bird's-eye view. the beardo says "Long time no see, Lilka.". trans pride flag energy beams shoot from the characters' upraised palms, meeting in the middle in an explosion of white. end page 5

note: Woźniak is a gender-neutral surname while Boguszewski has the masculine -ski suffix

[sketchdeath22]

Out of context Umbrella Academy reactions/things I wrote down but for episodes 3 and 4 of season 4

(Spoilers ahead):

-Big ass squid

-GO KLAUS GO!

-Girl, Ray did not walk out.

-Just sayin'

-young man

-Little Greek guy with the mustache (I need to yap abt how funny this could have been if they weren't actually together)

-Guys... the communication is not communicating.

-Mm, yep that magic psoriasis.

-Truman show'd

-Get everyone in this show therapy. PleeeaaSsse.

-Llama tits

-I LOVE VIKTOR!!!

-JEEASSUUSS HES FRESHLY 18 STOP

-*sigh* Klaus dearest...

-JUST TALK ABOUT IT

-Thanks for being the voice of reason Claire

-KLAUS

-Poor Claire

-Diego clue hunting again

-why do I always wear suits...?

-Harpooned by yourself

-At least they remembered some of the symptoms of being around yourself

-Shoot the bald guy...?

-Stranger Things ahh glow

-I don't even question the squid, it's UA, weirder things have happened.

-YES VIKTOR STAND UP TO HIM SAY YOUR PIECE

-Mom?

-This looks like my aunts place.

-cute scarf! And another comic reference?!? Is he gonna float all the time now?!?!

-Kill me right now!

-Freaky little man

-Dancer!

-ooh she's good.

-Klaus what have you done now...

-Yeah, how did he die, dear Luther?

-Those snacks look pretty good

-Doc Ock ahh Ben

-Average Appalachian activities

-Meow Wolf room

-Come on Lila!

-monke

-Why couldn't she rumor him to just, be sober, like, gang.

-Hey! I think the comic had a ship similar to that! (Rereading this and I'd like to clarify an airship not relationship)

-FOOL YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO OPEN THE BOX!

-shot on site

-Get it Viktor!

-Klaus, my little boy (gn)

-This is an interesting parallel to the comic (sorry I'm yapping about it but I do quite like seeing it)

-Oh dear...

-Deigo is literally ripped. what?

-Babysit them

-Luther and Deigo bonding and being very cringefail I think its great

-Why is the teenager the only person who thinks

-MONEY MONEY MONEY NO NO!

-Musical number

-Don't.

-Oh dear ×2

-You're hurting Klaus! >:[

-Luther and Deigo share a brain cell

-Delores

-Great, Five and Lila are causing time line issues.

-Leave her.

-How we gonna ruin it

-NO YOU'RE GONNA GIVE HIM WAR FLASHBACKS

-NO NO NO NOT BURIED ALIVE PLEASE OH MY GOD

-YuCK UGH BLEH STOP

[therantsofawriterrr]

The Umbrella Academy Final Season: My Version

Part Two: The Keepers

Overview: Lila and Five probe into a mysterious group called the Keepers, while someone at the CIA gets orders to stop Five.

TW: Mature language, mentions of PTSD and trauma, also, if you don't want spoilers to s4, read it after watching ig, tell me if i missed anything!! Pairings in the chapter: Five×OC, a little bit of Diego×Lila (I'm just gonna give these two so much love, bruh), also, Lila and Five being sibling-coded besties. A/N: hellu, hellu, here's the second chapter. so i realised i dunno what Derek's pronouns are in the show, so like, if i got it wrong pls tell me i'll rectify it immediately. Also, we have the Diego and Lila pairing THAT DESERVED TO SEE LESGOOOO

Masterlist

Since Five started working in the CIA three years prior, he had solved many cases. Many that had been a threat to national security and all that. When he'd heard of the cult called The Keepers, he'd decided to check them out, solely because he thought it was worthwhile.

It was the tenth meeting he was attending, being consistent and playing the part as perfectly as he could, listening to people rant in a support group. He was starting to think it was a waste of time.

"My name is Gus," the man who'd raised his hand spoke, making Five blink once to get himself back into task at hand.

"Hi, Gus," Five said with the others who were sitting around in the circle.

"I've been searching for the truth my whole life. Then I found this group. And it was like, a lightbulb went off. For the first time, I heard people talking about what I was going through," Gus ranted emphatically. Five held a yawn in his mouth, letting out a slow breath to let the air out.

"I realised, there's nothing wrong with me. It's this timeline, man. It's screwed up!"

If he'd been any younger, Five would have asked, "Are you sure it's not you who's screwed up, Gus?"

But he only took part in the murmurs of "Yeah!" and "Exactly!"

"I know I can come here and say anything. I could say that Sir Reginald Hargreeves is actually an alien who's secretly grooming a cabal of teenage super soldiers, and all you guys actually know what I'm talking about."

Shit. Bullseye.

That wasn't known to anybody but him and his family. His eyebrows bowed in a tiny furrow before he went back to his poker face.

Gus took a small breath, putting out his hands for the person on either side of him to hold.

"And now, I have hope. 'Cause I know a cleanse is coming."

Everyone started clapping, the soft noise echoing in the walls to ring in his ears. His brain started acting up once again as some gruesome memories of the past went through his head.

"Thank you, Gus," the guy sitting beside him said. "Thank you."

The bald man turned to Five next, looking at him encouragingly as he asked, "How about you? Got anything you wanna share?"

"Yeah, sure," Five replied, trying to cook up a lie in a second. But then he had a second thought.

Fuck that.

"Hi, my name's Jerome," he said, lifting a hand in hello, waiting for the others to say it back. "I'm still new to all this, but I can tell you folks, what you're talking about is real," he heaved a big sigh, getting lost in his mind, back in the apocalypse, the first time. "You're not crazy. I know because I've been to other timelines. I don't look it, but I'm 63. I spent 45 years lost in a future apocalypse. And I was involved in the Kennedy assassination. All that's unraveling now. I don't know what's real and what's not anymore. I feel like I can't trust anybody. All I know is I'm glad to have found all of you," he finished, letting out another quick sigh. "That's it. That's all I got."

The room erupted into claps again and his shoulders bunched up in response as he almost got under his chair for protection.

"You wanna hear some real shit, kid?" The guy beside him asked, not really waiting for an answer. "I'll take you to a real meeting."

Five resisted the urge to smirk victoriously, knowing he was getting closer to whatever the truth was.

When he entered the CIA building, he was walking briskly.

"You're late," an agent friend of his, Derek, announced.

"I know," Five answered sheepishly.

"Mustache."

His hand automatically went up, peeling the mustache off his upper lip and handing it to them, taking the file in return and going to the bathroom to change into his suit.

After changing, he pretty much jogged to the boss's room, knocking and entering when he heard a, "Yeah, come in."

"The Keepers function mainly as a support group," he droned as he handed in his mission report. "But, with strong cult-like tendencies. Membership is rapidly growing across all metro areas in the US, as well as in Europe. It's all there in my report, sir."

The deputy director of the CIA, Lance Ribbons, looked through the report and asked, "What's the organizing principle?"

Five took in a quick breath, hesitating before replying, "They believe we're all somehow stuck in the wrong timeline."

"Well," Lance said as his lips curved to one side in an amused smirk. "Just a bunch of loony tunes if you ask me."

He wove his fingers together on the table and turned serious. "Drop this Keeper nonsense. Move on. I think it's time you got back to your other cases. Ladybug, Panama, Chicken Wing."

Five felt a prickle of irritation but didn't show it on his face. "Sir, I am making progress with this."

"Now, you listen to me," Lance interrupted firmly, raising a hand. "You have the makings of a fantastic spook. A suspicious mind, a love of complexity and detail. A certain maturity, that most of my young agents lack. Play your cards right, you'll be running this place someday. "

Five stared at the man and took in a deep breath. He knew that the underlying statement beneath all that unnecessary flattery was just to say, "Do as I say, I mean well."

But something still didn't seem right. It might not be a national security level threat, but it surely was a mystery as to how these guys believe they remember the events of another, or, more accurately, the previous timelines.

"Thank you for saying that, sir."

Elsewhere in her home, Lila was getting ready for book club, wearing a pink strapless dress and styling her hair and makeup. She went out to the living room, showing her outfit to Diego with a spin.

"How do I look?" she asked. "Does this dress make me look weird?"

"Nah, you look great as always," Diego complimented in a soft voice, looking at her with stars in his eyes and a sweet, encouraging smile. "Do you feel like it?"

Lila's lips curved into a confident smile as she leaned down and gave him a peck on the lips. "Well, see you after book club, my love."

"See ya," he said, watching her exit the house. Immediately after, he opened the friend tracker app on his phone. He hoped she'd keep her location on, just so that he'd know she was safe. Grace came running to him with the twins, telling him about a cartoon they wanted to watch, so he happily set them on his lap, holding them close with a content smile, and watched the show with them, glancing at his phone at regular intervals.

At the meeting place, the bald guy, whose name Five had gotten to know was Larry, climbed up the stairs excitedly as he adjusted his suit.

"All right, just be cool, Jerome," Larry told him, even though he sounded just a tad bit nervous. "Anybody asks, you're with me."

Five followed Larry into the meeting room, opening the door and letting it close behind them. Five looked around the room curiously and suspiciously, as if he was trying to get the secrets out just by staring at the walls and the people.

His eyes went back to Larry's and he returned his smile with a fake excited one.

"These are the real Keepers. Best of the best," Larry stated, before greeting another member.

Five's eyes did another search of the room and he almost missed it. Almost.

Was it his imagination, or was Lila in this room? His eyebrows furrowed as he blinked once and confirmed what he saw was true. She was vociferously talking to an older woman in a different accent, asking for her opinion on something.

He sighed, as indignation and disappointment trickled down his spine. She was lying to his brother. Plus, she could blow his cover.

He placed a hand on his companion's back and excused himself, walking to where she was standing and muttering, "So, this is book club, is it?"

He heard her breath catch in her throat as she tittered and excused herself. She turned to keep her wine glass on a table as he fished up a name tag.

"You blow my cover, I'll rip your balls off," she warned, her accent immediately going back to normal.

"You're gonna blow my cover," Five argued. He decided not to talk about the fact that she was lying to his brother, who already had a shitload of trust issues. He'd keep in mind to address it, though.

"Nice mustache, by the way," Lila teased in a typical sister-in-law fashion. "What are you supposed to be? A Greek serial killer?"

Five chuckled as he wrote down his fake name on the tag. "I'll have you know this is top-of-the-line horse hair. The real question is, what are you doing here, 'Nancy' ?"

"Let's just say the transition from full-time assassin to full-time caregiver to 3 small children and a husband is no picnic," she explained in a dry tone. "I thought I'd be fine with it. And I am happy, don't get me wrong. But I can't help feel as if something's... missing."

Five could understand that to some extent. As much as he'd thought he'd finally get the retirement he'd been craving for in the past apocalypse, he'd been used to the stress and everything that he'd been going through in life. And if he was honest, he was happy to not have an apocalypse hanging over his head like a sword.

But then, did he know how to do anything else? Nope. So the CIA it was.

"But, y'know, these losers might be onto something," she whispered, as she stuck the name tag on his shoulder.

"If everyone can take their seats, the presentation's about to begin," someone announced.

Lila smiled excitedly like a kid in a candy store, and gestured to Five with a, "Come on."

Everyone started to sit down as two more people entered the room. Lila gasped when she spotted them, prompting Five to ask, "Who are they?"

"You never heard of Gene and Jean?" Lila asked, mild surprise and sarcasm lacing her tone. "Sure you're part of the right CIA?"

"Oh, just spit it out," Five demanded exasperatedly.

"Gene and Jean started the very first chapter in Clovis, New Mexico. Since then, the movement has been everywhere."

The lights dimmed as a white screen rolled down at the very front as Lila gave out a small excited giggle.

Jean took to the podium, tapping on the mic once and then saying, "Wow. Wowie! I mean, holy shit!"

Five observed her typical Southern drawl and noted it down mentally for later.

"Pardon my French, but look at all these beautiful shining faces. It is too much. Thank you for being here. We have a big night planned, because tonight, we will be discussing..." She paused for dramatic effect as a projector lit up the screen.

"The Umbrella Effect."

Five's eyebrows furrowed, and he could quite literally hear the gears turning in Lila's mind.

"And how I believe, we can return to a restored... and correct timeline," Jean finished with a relieved and triumphant smile.

"Now, what do we mean, when we talk about the Umbrella Effect?" She asked. Five couldn't help but notice Gene just standing behind her, smiling like an idiot. He almost snorted, but kept it inside, focussing on the speech instead. "Well, some people refer to it as 'timeline sickness'."

Five and Lila exchanged a look, trying not to laugh out loud at the sheer absurdity of the statement.

"These artifacts, from other timelines," she explained as the picture changed to the old Umbrella Academy toys that had been made for kids' entertainment. Five had never liked those things.

"Like the shared memories, so many of us have experienced, huh? Yup. Memories, the powers that be would have you believe are just figments of our imagination."

"A dapper dandy holding an umbrella, standing on the grassy knoll," Gene announced as the picture changed again, this time to the old picture of Reginald Hargreeves holding an umbrella on the grassy knoll, just before Kennedy was assassinated.

"An obscure sex cult called 'Destiny's Children'," he pointed out as the slideshow changed to a brochure and pamphlets about Klaus's cult, which included a picture of Klaus, looking like the saint the family knew he wasn't. Lila and Five exchanged disappointed looks this time. That idiot just had to do that, didn't he?

"A litter of child superheroes in short pants, from which we derive the name of this phenomenon, the Umbrella Effect."

The pictures of The Umbrella Academy made Five want to die of cringe. And that uniform freaked him out for some reason.

"Question is," Jean started saying. "Who benefits from covering this up?"

Five could hear everyone holding their breaths as he sighed with boredom. At this point, he preferred the nightmares that his mind provided at night than the one that he was living in at that moment. He found his eyes fluttering with sleep. Right, he hadn't slept the previous night, had he?

"The elites, of course," Gene answered, his noise booming in the silent room and driving away the sleep. The room was immediately filled with people murmuring in agreement, as the pictures changed to show various photos of Reginald and his wife Abigail Hargreeves. Five had the distinct hankering to ask what paparazzi reporter they'd hired to take these photos. "The ruling class has always been threatened by the truth. But they cannot stop the truth, now, can they? No, I didn't think so."

The screen changed to show an umbrella and sparrow baby stroller as Jean continued, "These artifacts are proof, that we're living in the wrong timelines. And they're the key, to bringing about, the Cleanse."

The way she said the last word sent a distinct feeling of nostalgia through his bones, even though he didn't know why.

"What the hell is the Cleanse?" Five whispered to Lila.

"No idea, but shut your mouth," Lila whispered back.

"Your whisper is very high-pitched," Five said in an attentive tone.

"Don't blow our covers."

Before Five could retort back, Gene asked, "Is there a problem back there?"

Five tensed as he felt the dread pool in his belly as Lila gave him a glare.

"Could you little Chatty Cathys stand up, please?" Jean asked, a tinge of offense and suspicion in her voice.

Lila and Five stood up, and he saw their faces change instantly. Gene chuckled as Jean said, "Oh, Papa, it's Nancy!"

"Hi everyone," Lila waved.

"And who's your little friend? I don't believe we've met," Jean asked, all hostility seemingly gone.

"This is my handsome fella-"

"Jerome," Five interrupted, shrugging off Lila's hand that just landed on his shoulder. "From the Orlando branch."

"Looks like your suntan could use a little work there, Jerome," Gene said, humor in his voice, but daggers in his eyes.

"Ahh yeah, I just go there because it's the nearest one I could find to my workplace," Five made up on the spot coolly. "Dang nine-to-fives can be tiring as hell, y'know. And the commute is just a bitch, pardon my swearing," he finished, pasting on a sweet smile. The people in the room chuckled and agreed, as Lila gave him an appreciative look.

Their expressions changed again, to a little trusting. They'd bought his lie.

"Well, maybe there's something we could help clarify," Jean asked encouragingly.

"We were hoping maybe you could elaborate on the concept of the Cleanse," he stated curiously.

"Some believe it's the end. Others believe it's but a great restoration," Gene explained.

"We don't know much about it ourselves right now, I mean, we gotta research and stuff too, y'know," Jean bragged, earning a few chuckles from the crowd. "But rest assured, because we are preparing a very special lecture on just this topic."

"Oh, well, that's lucky," Five stated. "Thank you, both."

They both sat down, even as Lila looked a bit worried.

Back in the CIA building, Clementine Rosewood, the deputy director's assistant was walking down a corridor to get to his office, her kitten heels clacking against the floor. She was still looking through a file as she just reached his door when she stopped.

"Yes, sir," Lance said in the office, his voice crystal clear because of her powers. "Yes, sir, I'm trying to make sure Five doesn't investigate it anymore. You know how he can be."

She strained to hear the person on the other end of the phone and it took a bit, but she succeeded.

"What's the plan if he doesn't?" the person asked. She guessed it was the director.

"Well, I suppose we can't help it, then," was the direct answer, making her suck in a breath in surprise as her head lifted to look at the door in surprise.

She gulped before knocking on the door, entering after his affirmation.

"I have proofread the reports, they just need your sign," she said with a polite smile.

"Ahh, thank you, Miss Rosewood."

"You're welcome, sir. Is there anything else you need?"

"Well, I do need a favor. Are you friends with Mr. Five?"

Her jaw clenched as her smile threatened to falter, but she replied normally, "Oh, I wouldn't go as far as to say friends. Work acquaintances would be a better way to describe it, I think."

He nodded in understanding. "Do you know he's been investigating a support group lately?"

"Yes. I read some of his reports. The Keepers," she answered.

"What do you think about it?"

"I think it could be worth our resources, sir," she stated, putting her hands behind her back and holding her left wrist with her right tightly. She didn't have too many pointers on this. "Developing cults like this one have proven to pose a threat in the past after developing to their full potential. Mr. Five might only be trying to prune the danger before it comes."

"All that is understandable," Lance reasoned, his eyes turning tired suddenly. "But I'm the one catching fire from the boss. So, I need you to talk to him and make him focus on his more important cases."

"I'll try my best, sir," she said, leaving when he nodded wearily.

When she exited the office, she whipped out her phone, pulling up Five's contact. He didn't pick up, to no one's surprise, which made her groan through her teeth. She went straight to Derek, knocking at the table to get his attention.

"Where is he?" she asked, making Derek sigh, eyes returning to the computer and a few mouse clicks later, he recited the location to her.

After thanking him, she headed out to get in her car.

If she didn't have a serious conversation about this, Five and her both were going to land in trouble.

It wasn't just that the bosses didn't want him to investigate The Keepers, it was that they were ready to do anything to stop him from doing it.

And, well. Even if they didn't see eye to eye most of the time, he didn't deserve that.

Likes, reblogs and comments are highly appreciated. Tysm for reading!!!

[baenyth]

Bethany's Bizarre Miraculous Reviews Episode 3:13: Startrain.

Alright, Max episode. Admittedly of the four "auxillary duos" as I call them (Max and Kim, Ivan and Mylene, Rose and Juleka, Nathaniel and Marc) I like Max and Kim the least, but then again I feel like they had the least elaborations season 2. Max was overshadowed a bit by Markov. Maybe I'll see some new depths to him!

Damn, Master Fu helping Marinette go on a field trip while giving her a failsafe in case something happens. How helpful!

BALD! BALD! BALD! BALD!

omg the "Hurry up Sabrina!" alarm pfffft

Markov has facial recognition technology. In-universe that bypasses Miraculous masks. He knows. And Max probably knows too.

Sabrina's got a big bag in case her girlfriend needs anything. Wow.

Chloe's going to sleep through this akuma, isn't she?

Alya's telling Marinette she makes too many plans. Adding that to the chart.

Rose sleeping in Juleka's lap >>>>>>>>>>>>

Also Alya seems a little sus of Lila. Another point against the salters!

Credit where it's due. Chloe evacuating everyone and locking up the Akuma was really good!

The fucking cubes lmao

Alright episode. It focused more on Max's mom more than anything, though. Maybe in the episode where he gets akumatized again?

Edit: Oh right Adrien managed to get on the field trip, but who signed his permission slip? Either he's really good at forging signatures or he got his real daddy or Natalie to sign them.

[princess-of-the-corner]

Well, that "is natural redhead" part was more about HC!Lila not being "bald girl with dozen of wigs" than her hair color, so it's fine if it's more "reddish-brown" than red/orange

Oh

Then yeah it's just Lila and her mom and her hair is real