#likely wouldnt have done the same if the roles were reversed

[rosykims]

im revamping (😏) triss's whole chara arc as i go through this replay and honestly im thinking maybe she should hate rebecca a little more. as a treat. originally i had her relationship with rebecca as "good but distant" and her wanting to improve it.... which i think is still how their dynamic starts. but an intergral part of triss's backstory is that she DID encounter smth supernatural as a kid which traumatized her deeply and nobody believed her. and rebecca downplayed it as just triss's imagination and basically let the therapists deal w it instead. which was also a catalyst for her going off the rails later in life. so yeah finding out that her mother was in on the whole supernatural conspiracy this WHOLE time and basically gaslit her as a kid into believing she was crazy...... mm. i think im gonna let triss give her the silent treatment for at LEAST a book and a half to cope

[plantboiart]

Saw @the0retically’s post about rand probably knowing that the deeps had died and now my brain. Is going overtime with the kiangst.

How many times did kian feel like an outsider with his best friends? Like he didnt matter as much, like they could never love him like he loved them, like he was a second priority, an afterthought, just the person who was also there?

Did he see rand screaming and yelling at rolan for betraying them, for leaving, only to then quietly let kian go not too long after? Did he cry on his way to la, hating that he’d known this was how things would go, that rand wouldn’t care about fighting to keep him like he did with rolan?

When rolan didnt keep in contact with him, was there always a quiet voice in the back of his head telling him that rolan probably called rand back? That the two of them probably still talked, even if it wasnt as often, that kian just wasn’t included in their friendship anymore?

Did he learn about the fact that rolan’s parents were dead, and connect the dots that rand must have known. That in a town like galloway, there was no way he DIDN’T know. That rand hadn’t called kian and asked him to come visit because he genuinely missed him and wanted to see him, it was entirely because his plan to help rolan through finally finishing their campaign required kian there. That kian was an afterthought. A piece in the game rather than a player in it. Just there to fill the silence and space.

Did he run after rolan after they found rat, and think about how rolan would never care to do the same for kian? Did he patch himself up after the car crash, on the brink of death, and hate that he couldn’t even be disappointed the others didn’t bother to check if he was alright? Did he see becky, one of the only people who had ever fully cared about him, and feel so stupidly hopeful that maybe she could love him like he loved her still?

Did he go see her, knowing he might not come back alive, and justify it by telling himself that nobody would really miss him anyways? That even if she killed him, it wouldnt matter when nobody would mourn his death for longer than a second or two?

When he was dying, when he was dead, was he able to think, to feel, to understand what was happening around him? Did he wait for hours, crying to himself when more and more time passed and nobody, NOBODY came to find him? Not even dickman? When rolan finally came, when he got his copy, did kian feel a sick sort of satisfaction and happiness, knowing that at least rolan had cared enough to come towards the sound of his music? (Did he ever learn that rand had ignored it?)

When he felt, lived through, experienced rolan cutting into his copy (him in such a horrible way it was still him) to protect rand, and wonder if rolan could have done the same if the roles were reversed? If he had to kill rand to protect kian? Did he spend the last moments as that version of himself feeling just as unloved as always before?

Could his corpse think? Could it hear? Could it hear the others arguing about which one was going to go closer to him, to save him? Did his singing grow even more pleading, even more desperate, as he wordlessly begged them not to leave him? To at least care enough to do this for him? Even just for a second, did he think they’d leave? Leave him there, alone, dead, and in pain? Did he have to feel relieved when rolan started actually singing with him?

Did he stay at the community house, because they wouldn’t care? Because kian’s life never mattered like theirs’ did? When becky tried to push him back towards it, did he know she wasnt trying to protect him, but tell himself that she was anyways because he just needed someone to care about him? Did he run towards the docks, and expect them to already be gone without him?

Did he see the queen’s true form, and know he wouldn’t be mourned? Did he see what was about to happen before it did, and finish the lyrics back to her anyways, because in the end, what did it matter?

Kian was just an extra. An outsider, a second priority, an afterthought, the person who was also there. Nobody would miss him anyways. Not when there was anyone else that could be mourned instead.

[sidesteppostinghours]

The Star, The Hanged Man & Judgment in Reverse for Caine? c:

evening! thank you for the ask!

The Star: When has your character been most hopeful?

this feels a little sad to say but i think when he escaped the first time? caine is a fundamentally curious person, so when he saw what life outside the farm was like, they were a little overwhelmed by all the possibilities. everything was so new and fresh, it felt like they could do anything. it took a while before they figured out what they wanted to do, and theyve never felt the same wonder since.

The Hanged Man: When has your character needed to step back and look at things from a different perspective?

i have No idea if possessing hark counts but IM PUTTING IT IN THERE ANYWAY. caine had to figure out how emotions worked in order to play the role of hark which is something they havent done in a Hot Minute, especially with their outsider scar making their own emotions feel so disconnected. he basically had to relearn emotional intelligence skills and it uh. well it only really worked when he was hark. their puppet individuality is through the Roof because of this.

Judgment in Reverse: When has your character found it difficult to forgive themselves?

becoming a villain. theyre a current self rival, if they had a choice, they wouldnt have ended up on this path, but thats the thing– they dont have a choice. he fully believes that becoming a villain was the only way to do what needed to be done. hes disappointed in himself for not being able to find another way, he hasnt forgiven himself for turning to lycan, but they dont regret it. regret is for people who made the wrong call.

questions from here!

[caps-clever-girl]

god marvel did us dirty by having 2 of the people tony could best get along with on the opposing side of the civil war so that they never had any oppertunity to develop what could have been super good friendships and instead just became Immediate Enimies without even really having exchanged more than a scentence or so first

like bucky and tony? would have been fuckin GREAT together. same ‘i am a shit’ sense of humour, Much Mischief bois, used to steve’s patent brand of bullshittery, and very sarcastic. bucky’s a big believer in sticking together and credit where credit is due and accepting help, and is interested in tech. tony kind of has the tech thing, you know, covered - i wanna see tony explaining improvements or ideas for buckys arm and bucky actually following along.

i also wanna see tony stick fridge magnets to that arm and bucky follow up by putting pudding in tony’s pillowcase, or hello kitty magnet’s on the suit’s ass. c’mon giys think of the prank wars.

bucky moving things around in the lab and driving tony fucking bonkers.

discussing hair care

constant comments about how hot the other one is because they are both Massive Flirts and oh god stop. stop guys please.

bucky: you cant stop love sam

sam: bucky no

tony: bucky yes

sam: tony no

bucky: tony yes

i want some reporter trying to one-up them and tony and bucky sharing a Very Specific eye-roll before teaming up to seamlessly oblitterate the guy with the smooth and smart fast-talk, just absolutely bouncing off of eachother.

i want them coming to trust eachother, culminating in bucky letting tony work on and eventually replace his prosthetic arm. unexpectedly, tony repays him by letting him suggest ideas for his suit (and others) and letting him take a deeper look.

i want them bonding over experiences with ptsd, trying to help eachother out with tips for panic attacks and grounding methods. i want them to talk about howard and maria, about how they were good friends with bucky but how howard wasnt the best dad, and about their death, and i want them to bond over their mind-controll experiences.

and scott - come on. that sarcastic little shit? if they’d have met different ways you can fucking garentee that he and tony would have gotten along like a house on fire. i mean:

ah yes, first instinct. lets just have a sit down in an abandoned car. these two tired dumbass/smartass dads could be on SUCH the same wavelength. PLUS THE STARK/PYM RIVALRY???? absolutely DELICIOUS and you cannot tell me that scott wouldnt absolutely delight in it.

hank: tony stark is a bastard and his technology is SHIT

scott: he got me a starbucks yesterday actually i think hes pretty great

hank: you whore

breaking in somewhere together??? iron man 3 tony and scott going balls to the wall to gain access to some dickwad’s secret base? do u send in the 2 master spies? no, u send in the booby trap boy and the catburglar. the Big Brain moments they would have with their cool ass tech and pure Skills sneaking in and also simoultaneously knocking over something very expensive because they are so stupid!!

scott introducing tony to every ant he knows and tony keeps pretending he doesnt give a shit but that one is called ANT-onio Banderas and its nuzzling him oh god babies

these two smart dudes trying in an absolute PANIC over something their kids have done like scrape a knee and the kid listens to twenty minuets of them hyperventilating before going ‘i put a plaster on like quarter of an hour ago, its fine’. tony making something Cool and New and Better Than Pym’s Bullshit Ain’t That Right Langy and scott having a reasonable idea of what it does but still managing to both use it to hide steves shield somewhere dumb and also blow it up ten seconds after shouting ‘hey tones i think i got the hang of this!’ tony and scott working together on a new project, surrounded by paper and plans and bits of wire and covered in dinosaur and princess plasters from all the little electric shocks they keep getting, getting hours deep into conversations about tech and ideas.

ant-sized scott accidentally flipping tony over his shoulder and across the room when tony offered him a finger to shake instead of his hand. tony accidentally smacking a pint-sized scott into a ceiling light.

teaching their kids how to prank the other avengers and how to Suddenly And Conveniently Dissapear afterwards - and to make IMMEDIATE BAMBY EYES if caught. scott basically using tony as a sugar daddy and wanting to get bagels or ice cream or starbucks and whining like a child until tony gives him ten bucks. (scott knowing tony’s preferences by heart and always getting him something too.) the two of them lovestruck by super cool women who can and have handed them their respective asses on multiple occasions. verbally oblitterating anyone who opposes them and also being able to absolutely bullshit their way out of any situation because they are Liars and Good At It.

bonding over the heavy responsibility of using powerful technology for the greater good that they kind of inherited from people they want to live up to but also be better than, and scared of what would happen if that trusted tech fell into the wrong hands. taking that tech and making it theirs and only theirs. concepts of identity. and bonding over wanting to be the best example for their kids and give them everything, and trying to make sure they dont make the same mistakes as they did. i mean, scott understood why tony wasn’t willing to help at first in endgame - sure it fucking killed him, but the most important thing to him is cassie, and he gets that tony doesnt want to risk basically making morgan never exist. if the roles were reversed then could he make the choice? could he face up to the posibility of dooming cassie to get hope and her parents back? like these guys have so much to Talk about. theres a level of insintric understanding that just wasn’t explored.

like look at all the cool shit we could have had, but no, just Outright Hatred.

[missjackil]

@noxbait asked:

What do you think Sam meant when he said "same circumstances I wouldn’t" in s9?

This has been a topic of debate since it happened. So much drama and confusion, both on the show and within the fandom. It was a very sad time indeed. Samgirls think Sam means that he wouldn't let an Angel possess Dean if he was dying, and Deangirls think Sam was just trying to hurt Dean because he was mad at him, and some think he actually meant, he wouldn't try to save Dean’s life period, which everyone with an IQ over 20 that has watched the show knows that isn't true.  Well, I don't believe either answer is correct, and I’ll tell you why. 

I think the answer is much clearer if you don't assume Sam is talking about the possession, but about Dean talking him out of closing the gates of Hell. I won't argue that Sam is angry about Dean tricking him into being possessed, but that’s not the focus of this argument. It starts when Dean tells Sam that he saved his hide back there (at the spa) and at the church, and at the hospital, and he'd do it again. Sam says that's what the problem is, Dean thinks he’s his brother his Savior who has to swoop in and save him and he thinks its the right thing to do but it's not. Kevin is dead, Crowley is in the wind and they're no closer to solving the Angel problem. Sam asks “Tell me, what is the UPSIDE of me being alive?”

Of course for Dean, it’s the simple fact that Sam isn't dead. For Sam, had he died, none of these things would be a problem.  This isn't “Had you not gotten me possessed” its “Had you let me die...” 

As we saw in S5, Sam is a martyr. He is willing to die to save the world. Now Dean is a martyr also, but he had yet to give his life up for the world. For Sam yes, he has died for Sam, but not for the world. When Sam chose to sacrifice himself in S5, Dean was very reluctant, but he didn't try to stop him, so for Dean to try to stop him now, in Sacrifice, Sam feels like theyre not on the same page anymore and he basically said this in Sharp Teeth. They don't see eye to eye on their roles in this anymore, so when Dean says “If the situation was reversed, and I was dying, you’d do the same thing” Sam is responding “No Dean I wouldn't, Same circumstances ( you giving your life to save the world) I wouldn't” 

Now, this still sounds OOC for Sam, doesn’t it? But it's not. First, we know Dean took what he said the wrong way, as though Sam wouldnt save his life period, But Sam has done it many times before. and even went over and beyond the call of duty even when he couldn't save him.  In S10 Sam tells Dean “I can’t lose you” and Dean says “Did you change your mind on that? Cause thats not what you said before” and Sam says “You know I didn't mean.....” all while Sam is Hell-bent on saving Deans life the entire season. ( I will get to Deans death scene in s9 “I thought you were cool with this?” “I lied” at the end of this essay if you're still awake) However, when we start off S11, Sam reasserts that they have to stop doing this. They need to stop saving each other at the expense of the world and the lives of others, so he talks Dean into doing his thing, save the girl and the baby, but he needs to let Sam do his thing, put his life on the line to save the world. 

Fast forward to the mid season of s11, and we have Lucifer confronting Sam on the same issue. He thinks he’s gone soft.  He’s telling Sam he doesn't have the balls anymore to make a great sacrifice for the world and he cant stand to lose Dean again, Sam disagrees and Lucifer says “Then why did you let Dean talk you out of closing the gates of Hell? Cause the old Sam wouldn't have that, not ever. And then we come to Sam’s big moment, telling Lucifer what's what, but I think we all get hung up on Sam saying he’s not ready to be his bitch, and not paying much attention to what he says before that “Im ready to die, Im ready to watch the people I love (Dean) die”. Yes, at that point, Sam was willing to let Dean die to save the world if it was necessary and he proved this in 11.23 when he made no argument about Dean being the soul bomb. Of course, he was upset about it, but he didn't try to talk him out of it. So, Sam was being honest when he said “Same circumstances (if you're trying to save the world) I wouldn't”

Now, Sam is never gonna do that again, as we saw in Prophet and Loss. Enough of this dying alone bullshit. He’s gung ho now on “If we die, then we do that together too” (Unfinished Business)

Now the problem of Dean’s death scene in 9.23 “I thought you were cool with this” “I lied” , 2 things need to be said about this. Jared said at a panel after s9 that he was supposed to say “I didnt think it would go this way” but forgot his line, said “I lied” and they kept it. Also, it was in response to their argument in the trailer park earlier in the episode. Dean tells Sam he’s gonna take down Metatron and’ Sam says “I know” and Dean says “No matter the consequences” and Sam says “I know” so he’s cool with Deans plan to take down Metatron no matter the consequences, but there he was trying to save Dean instead of letting him stay there to try to keep fighting. 

Sorry it was winded but I hope this sheds new light on a long-debated topic

Thank you Noxie!!

[gamingofkenna]

beat the main quest of Breath of the Wild. the ‘post-game’ feature (since gameplay after beating the game is exactly the same) is now there’s a little completion percentage on your map page, to tell you how close you are to doing everything that can be done in the world

my percentage immediately starting the game up again was 23.6%. i was WAY overestimating how much of what could be done I had done.

review under the cut (for spoilers)

so about halfway through playing the main quest i suddenly got this idea for this amazing plot twist. essentially we had been told that there were two things necessary to defeat ganon in every time; a hero wielding the sealing sword, and a princess with the blood of the goddess Hylia who inherited her sealing powers (why she needs to specifically be a princess though? who knows). obviously Link is supposed to be the sword-wielder and Zelda the Hylia-descendant, but as we unlock more of Link’s old memories we get some really interesting character development. Zelda has spent her entire life trying to unlock her powers, and failing, and no one can tell why. she starts to doubt her destiny, if theyre doing the right thing, if ganon even can be stopped, if she’s been abandoned by the goddesses, etc etc.

so the obvious solution to that, to me, is a role reversal. im going to say now that the game doesn’t actually do this (i was worried it wouldnt), but there were a ton of hints that Link would end up the ‘princess’ with the sealing power, and Zelda the ‘hero of hyrule’ wielding the master sword. she’s unable to hear the voice of the goddesses even when visiting sacred sights, but playing as Link we can communicate with the goddesses and do quests for them no problem. Zelda can hear the voice of the master sword though (the sacred spirit inhabiting the sword we met in Skyward Sword). the major symbol in the game logo (along with the rusted sword) and throughout the game is the Silent Princess, a rare endangered flower, and yet Zelda’s definitely not silent. Link’s the iconic silent protagonist, however, and though this was the first loz game with voice-acted dialogue, none of Link’s dialogue is heard. theres even the heavily transphobic ‘Link dresses up as a girl’ subplot, and the fact that Zelda has spent the last one hundred years fighting Ganon all on her own, keeping him sealed within the castle until Link could reawaken

so. the game doesnt take this role switch route and im kind of disappointed, because it would have been a great way to reestablish zelda as the actual hero of her series (the development she’s gotten in the last few games has been pretty good, but frankly not enough). but beyond that, the entire ending itself was kind of disappointing? not game ruining, not knock off a star of the 5-star rating disappointing, but... anticlimatic?

theres all this buildup to fight Ganon, you do it, and the fights actually relatively easy (though still pretty epic, I’ve had boring final boss fights and I’ll take easy and incredible over difficult and boring any day). then Zelda’s finally freed and she’s still young for some reason, and Ganon’s not destroyed yet so she does some great magic sealing power (which we saw her finally acces in the very last unlocked flashback) to banish him, the day is saved, the lingering spirits get to move on and we promise to rebuild Hyrule to its former glory and the endangered Silent Princess flower is growing everywhere the end

so cool, nice, but why wasn’t zelda’s power working before? why did it suddenly start working? why was everyone making a big deal about the master sword if it wasnt even important to defeating ganon (who can take him on without it, its just your strongest weapon)?

it strikes me as a very japanese way of telling a story, but Last Guardian was a japanese game and still managed to have an incredibly satisfying ending. even if i hadnt gotten my hopes up for a plot twist, the ending is still just... you beat the villain the day is saved. zelda’s character arc had no conclusion? other than she suddenly managed to access her power... somehow. yay.

im definitely satisfied with the game. gameplay is incredible, exploring the world is fun for its own sake, and theres so much to do, so many people to meet, so many things to discover. Skyrim feels unplayable now that i’ve beat the main quest and most of the major sidequests, but I could log just as many hours on Breath of the Wild and still love it just for the sake of how beautiful this game is. its pretty, and calming if i want it to be, and exciting if i’d rather have that

and the lore of the game is still worthwhile. we’re still trying to figure out where it sits on the timeline, the characters who were introduced were really cool and i love that we got to see a more full characterization of zelda

i just feel like... we got a ton of open doors, lots of nice groundwork, and not as much completed construction, narrative-wise. few of my questions got answered, and open-endings can be great but i dont feel like the characters moved much from where they started

i dont know. id love to hear others reactions to the ending and now that i’ve beaten it i can look them up. i’ll probably be stewing on this for a while anyways

[lostinfic]

The Girlfriend Experience | Part 2

Trope: Sharing a bed Author: Lostinfic Word Count: ~4000 Rating: Mature Summary: Hardy asks Hannah to show him the Girlfriend Experience in preparation for a blind date. 

Beta: @fadewithfury <3 Part 1 | Masterpost | AO3 | 12 Tropes AO3 Collection

For the blind date, Hardy’s sister had given him nothing but an instruction to look out for a woman with a yellow carnation, and an address.

He assumed it was the address of a restaurant.

He should have known better than to assume his sister would do the normal thing.

It was a train. Not a normal train either, but a “romantic railway adventure”.

His stomach twisted in a knot at the mere thought of getting stuck in there for hours with a complete stranger. But backing out didn’t sit well with him. Standing up someone was cruel. Anyway, as Hannah had said, his sister wanted what was best for him. Whoever Helen had set him up with would, at the very least, be a decent person.

He sighed thinking of Hannah. Considering how she’d encouraged him to go on this bloody blind date-- even after he all but confessed his feelings for her during their fake date-- it was clear it was never going to happen with her. He had better move on and start looking for someone else.

Easier said than done. 

As much as the memory of their fake date made him cringe because she’d rejected his advances, it also came with a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach. Her laughter, the teasing hint of bra, standing close in the bookshop as they flipped through novels. Paper and cherry blossoms. And feeling all right.

For years, he hadn’t questioned his friendship with his younger sister’s flatmate. Even when Hannah became an escort and moved out, they stayed in touch. When they hang out, times flies, and that was enough for him. Nothing more.

Not until recently.

With the divorce and her visits, he noticed how much they had in common now after years of all-consuming careers, heartbreaks and successes. She had grown and so had he. And once he began seeing her as the strong woman she had become, he couldn’t go back to thinking of her as just a friend. But he had to.

Enough about Hannah.

Hardy straightened his tie and jacket. From the platform, a sign indicated the Bar & Lounge coach, and he headed there.

The train company had hired Helen as their art director— it’s how she’d obtained a pair of tickets-- and she came up with the idea of a 1930s theme. The staff wore stiff burgundy and gold uniforms. Inside the wagons, varnished wood gleamed in the halo of fake oil lamps. Patrons sat in plush leather seats around art deco furniture.

Hardy made his way through the couples gathered inside. Many had embraced the vintage theme, others had dressed more casually. Thankfully for him, a suit worked for all occasions and eras.

The train stirred and swayed forward. He had yet to find his date. Every time he met a woman’s eyes, the twist in his stomach tightened.

Someone tapped his shoulder.

“Hey you.”

He recognized that voice. His heart skipped a beat. He turned, and his jaw dropped. Hannah stood there, wearing something vintage and silky, like she’d just stepped out of a black and white movie. Ruby red lips framed a beaming smile.

“What are you doing here?” he stammered.

“I have a date.”

“My sister set you up too?”

“No, another one of our friends. Gemma, you met her I think at the garden party.”

“Yeah.”

“So yours is tonight too? They got a group deal on the train tickets or what?” She looked over his shoulder. “So where’s the lucky lady?”

“Haven’t found her yet. I don’t even know her name, Helen didn’t want me looking her up in the police database. Seen anyone with a yellow carnation?”

“Like this one?” She showed him the flower she was holding. “Looks like Gemma and Helen are in cahoots.”

Hardy gaped at the flower. Hannah was his blind date. She laughed, but he didn’t think it was funny. Not at all. What was his sister thinking? He’d never said a word to her about liking Hannah. Was he that obvious?

Regardless, now Hannah was stuck with him when she no doubt expected someone more charming and younger. Basically, not the kind of person who needs a practice date with a prostitute.

For the first time since they’d met, the prospect of spending an evening in her company filled him with dread. What if she thought he was behind all of it, not just his sister?

“Sorry, I didn’t know she would do that,” he groaned.

“Yeah, no, me neither.”

She laughed, and it was too high-pitched for genuine amusement but he reciprocated with his own nervous titter. He tugged at the knot of his tie.

“I don’t know what made her think I’d want to— that we were a match.”

“Right.” She crossed her arms, rubbing her shoulder. “Look at his this way: you won’t  have to worry about small talk.”

They ordered drinks and sat at the bar.  An uneasy silence stretched between them as they pretended to listen to the piano player.

He rang his sister to berate her, but she wouldn’t answer her phone-- on purpose, he was sure. Hannah looked at him with a tight-lipped smile.

“If you’d prefer to, ah, mingle...” He indicated the other passengers, but they were clearly all paired up already.

Hannah shrugged, seemingly coming to the same conclusion as him.

 The maître d’ announced supper, and passengers moved to the restaurant cart.

A waiter assigned them a banquette. Tea candles decorated the table, their flames made the crystalware sparkle.  

“This is nice,” Hannah commented, smoothing the white tablecloth.

He nodded absentmindedly, pretending to peruse the menu when in fact he was observing her. Hard to tell how she felt about being stuck with him for the evening. Granted, she’d enjoyed herself last time but it had been work for her, to help him.  He glanced at her over his menu, their eyes met, and both quickly looked away.

A waiter took their orders, leaving them with nothing to do. Hannah swirled the wine in her glass.

“I’ve been thinking,” she began, “I know this escort, a man, he’s real awful, don’t know how he’s still in business.”

Where was this going?

“Anyway, we should set your sister up with him, you know, to get back at her.”

Hannah grinned mischievously and Hardy chuckled. They talked about all the unpleasant people they knew and made up devious plans to deceive Helen. They laughed so much, patrons at nearby tables glared at them for disrupting the quiet romantic atmosphere. Of course, the irony didn’t escape Hardy: they had such fun thinking of revenge plans that it proved Helen had been right to play this trick on them to begin with.

After supper, Hardy reclined in his chair, rubbing his full stomach. He hadn’t had such a good meal in a long time. He was usually prone to motion sickness, but this train moved slowly. It crawled across the rail, allowing passengers to admire the pastoral landscape. He couldn’t tell their location or destination; fields, forests and suburbs looked the same across England as far as he was concerned. Perhaps, if he’d paid closer attention a sign would have given him a clue, but all his attention was diverted towards Hannah.

A waiter filled their cups with tea, and announced the train would stop soon for “entertainment”. They disembarked at a disused train station turned into a theater. An old-fashioned marquee announced the show’s title: “On the road to love.” On stage, two rubbish actors pretended to fall in love to the tune of 1930s jazz songs.  Throughout the first act, Hannah and Hardy exchanged eyerolls and stifled laughter.  When the actors began tap dancing, they barely kept it together.

At last, the intermission came, they were the first out the door. They bypassed the bar and headed straight outside.

The brisk night air was welcome after a heavy meal and a stuffed theater. Hands in pockets, Hardy leaned against the wall and stared at the silhouette of a town beyond the rails and bushes. Hannah imitated his position, close enough that their shoulders touched.

“We could get out,” he said. “Walk over there. Find a ride. End it here.”

“Do you want to leave?”

“Do you?”

She shrugged and leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. Hardy smiled to himself. She didn’t seem to hate being stuck with him tonight after all. And so far neither of them had brought up what happened at the end of their fake date; there was hope their friendship would survive.

“I suppose it’s not so bad,” he said.

“Yeah, not bad. Tell you what though, we can stay at the bar during the second act.”

A few other couples had the same idea. Show tunes could still be heard through the wall. The bar design recreated a prohibition-era speakeasy.

For a moment, Hardy entertained the idea of personifying a character. Someone cool, a la Humphrey Bogart. He wished he had a cigarette. As they stood at the bar to order drinks, he gave Hannah the old once-over from her black heels to her smokey eyes. But as soon as she caught him looking, he lost whatever cool he’d mustered. She bumped him with her shoulder, lips curling in a playful smile. He didn’t stand a chance.

Once sat at a corner table, they sipped a dram of whiskey and reminisced. She ran her fingertip along the rim of her glass, eyes focused on the circular motion. After a moment of silence, she said: “You know, I used to fancy you, when I lived with Helen.”

She said it with a giggle, looking at him through her eyelashes. He remembered a time when she would ceaselessly flirt with him. With her, he could never tell genuine feelings from teasing. Except a few times, lingering hugs and gazing in each other’s eyes. But he’d had to ignore that because back then he’d recently married so he wasn’t interested. Ironic, that the roles were now reversed: he fancied her-- more than fancy-- and she wasn’t interested. Bad timing.

“I knew you did,” he said.

“You did! How?”

“You weren’t subtle. I was scared every time my sister left the room.”

“Scared you’d give in to temptation?” she joked.

“No, it wasn’t like that.”

“No, I know. You’re one of the good guys. Too good.”

“Too good for what?”

“For girls who are outrageous flirts.” She winked.

Hannah dropped her shoe and slipped her toes under the hem of his trousers. He’d seen women do that in films, but had never experienced it for himself. Although, he couldn’t explain why, he enjoyed it. His cheeks heated up, and his pulse quickened. He forgot what they were talking about. She’d always loved to make him fluster.

The show ended, and the spectators loudly walked out, disrupting the moment.

Back on board the train, a staff member approached them: “If you would follow me, I will show you to you sleeper car now.”

Hardy and Hannah exchanged a surprised look, neither of them knew this lasted overnight. His only experience with sleeper cars involved bunk beds. But of course, a “romantic railway adventure” didn’t have bunks. The man opened the door on a cozy compartment with a double bed taking up most of the room. Hannah asked if they have another room available, but all compartments were occupied tonight.

At least, the train company had the foresight of selling overnight essentials such as toothbrushes. But no pyjamas, of course.

“Lend me your shirt,” Hannah demanded. “I can’t sleep in this dress.” She tugged at the material over her ribs, wincing in discomfort.

“What about me?”

“You can’t sleep in this dress either.”

“And what am I supposed to sleep in?”

“Your pants. Unless you’re going commando.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“I’m not— ugh. Alright.”

He hooked his tie and jacket behind the door, and removed his shirt with his back to her.

“You’re such a prude. I’ve seen you in a much worse state than this.”

“When?”

“At Helen’s, after your divorce.”

“Yeah, I looked worse, but I’m sure I was fully dressed.”

“Well, you’d better get undressed while you look good.”

Was she joking or flirting?

When he turned to hand her his t-shirt, her eyes lingered on his chest, and she bit her bottom lip.

She put the shirt over her clothes and shimmed the dress down her body to pull it off. More wiggling and she extracted her bra through the top.

“Tadaa!” she said like a magician.

It was his turn to linger. His shirt was just long enough to cover her bum, showing off her legs. He always liked her legs.

She looked expectantly at his trousers. There was no point in putting it off.  As soon as he popped the first button, Hannah wolf-whistled.  Without thinking, Hardy rotated his hips, and she bust out laughing.

“I can be funny too,” he mumbled.

“I know.” She smiled at him then cocked her head. “I thought you’d be skinnier.”

“I am.”

“Yeah, but there’s, you know, meat too.”

What was that supposed to mean? He crossed his arms to cover his chest, but it left his crotch uncovered, so he crossed his leg.

“Oh, just get in the bloody bed.”

Hannah smirked, but charitably held back another quip.

In the silence, he noticed it was raining, its pitter-patter on the metal roof echoed through the compartment. Hannah turned off the main light, leaving just the flame of an electric candle by the bed.

They looked at each other, then at the bed, then at each other again.

He hadn’t shared a bed with anyone since Tess. The last few years of celibacy and loneliness caught up to him all at once. He yearned for it, physically ached for it, to lie in bed with Hannah, hold her in his arms until morning.

“Well, I--”

“There’s something…” he began.

“Hm?”

“Something you said I should do at the end of the date.”

He gulped, hoping she understood what he meant.

“Kiss me goodnight?”

“Yeah.”

This time, he wouldn’t chicken out. She stepped forward and his mouth went dry. She caught him by surprise, pecking his lips. It happened too quickly. By the time he opened his eyes, she had slipped in the bed.

Well, there was only one thing to do now. Nothing left to delay the inevitable. He had to get in bed. With Hannah. She patted the space beside her, and he prayed she couldn’t hear his hammering heart.

Lying in bed, neither of them spoke. Every muscle in his body was stiff. The train’s wheels clattered on the tracks and raindrops splashed on the roof. And just when he thought he couldn’t take more of this tension, Hannah giggled.

She turned on her side towards him. Some light filtered through the curtains, just enough to illuminate the outline of her face.

“This is a bit weird,” she whispered.

His whole body relaxed, and he turned to face her too.

“I can think of worse,” he said.

“Yeah?”

“Imagine if it’d been a real blind date, with another woman, and I’d be stuck with her.”

“Maybe you would’ve liked her.”

“I don’t think so.”

How could he possibly like another woman when he had such feelings for Hannah? And right now, this moment was everything to him. He scooted closer, just a smidge. She folded her legs and their knees touched.

“So what, you’ll stay single forever? Tess really did a number on you.”

“I’m waiting for the right person.”

She searched his face, and he wondered how obvious he was, surely she must see the affection in his eyes. She blinked and looked down. A strand of hair caught in her eyelashes, and he gently swiped it behind her ear.

“What you said about after my divorce.” He continued to whisper although there was no reason for it. “I don’t think I ever thanked you for that. For checking up on me.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Her toes tickled his ankle and quite naturally, as though they’d been doing it for years, her leg slid between his.

“You know, I wanted to check up on you when you were in Broadchurch too.”

I would have loved that, he thought.

“I worked a lot,” he said.

There must have been more to say, things to explain and confess and profess, but not now, not when the moment was just right.

When he lost Tess, it wasn’ther betrayal that hurt the most, but losing that one person who knew him better than anyone else. It seemed impossible to build this level of intimacy and familiarity with another person in his lifetime. But maybe he didn’t have to start from the ground up, he and Hannah already had a foundation. All he had to do was add bricks and hope it didn’t crumble down.

“Han?”

“Yeah?” she mumbled sleepily.

“I-- I would’ve liked that, you visiting in Broadchurch…” He took a deep breath. Why was this so hard? “I thought about you.”

“Good.”

He chuckled at that. He kissed her forehead, and her eyes drifted shut with a smile.

They slept, a deep slumber despite the noisy train and unfamiliar surroundings.

Hardy woke up with one side of the body decidedly warmer than the other. Not just warmer-- heavier. And as the last fog of sleep cleared from his mind, he realized two things: Hannah had hogged all the blankets and she’d snuggled up to him. An arm around his waist, a leg across his thighs, and her head on his chest. And it appeared he’d reciprocated the snuggling. A hand rested on her ribs. High up on her ribs.  A confused debate of semantics and physiology took place in his mind, and he came to the conclusion that the area his hand rested on was more breast than side; he’d tried to cop a feel in his sleep.

Hardy cracked opened an eye. As far as he could tell, Hannah was still sleeping.  But if he moved his hand now, he risked waking her up and appearing more guilty than he was. He also became aware of another embarrassing situation: she had twisted in her sleep and buttons of the shirt had come undone, revealing the swell of her breasts. Of its own accord, his thumb moved, stroking the curve of her flesh, right along the underside. Before he could make himself stop, her nipple visibly pebbled under the cotton on the shirt-- his shirt.

A small noise, suspiciously close to a moan, escaped Hannah’s lips. She snuggled closer, and the hand on his stomach drifted lower. Hardy drew in a sharp breath. His arousal became more prominent. Embarrassing flashbacks from his teenage days made him cringe. He could put it all down to a physiological response, but he knew damn well it was Hannah’s proximity that caused the blood flow to his groin.

His groan made Hannah giggle.

“You’re awake,” he accused.

“Barely… sorry.”

She tried to roll off him, but he automatically tightened the arm around her. She looked up at him, eyes full of questions.

Stay. Don’t go. But his mouth wouldn’t form the words.

“I can’t tell what you want,” she said.

“Can’t you? Don’t you know?”

It was all so serious suddenly, so real and raw in the morning light. No place to hide.

“I asked you to kiss me, and you kissed my cheek,” she said, eyebrows knitted in a frown. “I turn out to be your blind date and you’re unhappy about it. I flirt with you all night and you-- I don’t know.”

Possibly, he hadn’t been as transparent as he thought.

“Sorry. I wasn’t sure. When you flirt, I just assume you’re taking the piss, so...”

“Sometimes it’s easier to joke than, I don’t know, open up.”

She picked at the bed sheet. He rarely got to see her so vulnerable,and it made his heart capsize. He would protect her from the world if she let him.  

“But you’re so-- and I’m…” He sighed. “You can do better.”

“It’s not for you to say.”

“I suppose not.”

He relaxed his arm around her, and she propped herself up on an elbow, keeping her other hand on his chest.

“I like you, Alec.”

“You used to, it’s what you said.”

“I still do. A lot. But I’m…” She let out a shaky breath. “Our friendship is really important to me.”

“Right. So… you only want to be friends?”

“I’m just saying I don’t have the best track record with relationships.”

“Me neither.”

“You were married for almost 20 years.”

“Exactly!”

She chuckled, and that sound made his heart soar. He covered her hand with his.

“As I’ve said: I can wait for the right person.”

“You meant me?”

“Of course.” He caressed her cheek. “Looks like there are a few things I need to clarify. Beginning with this...”

His fingers drifted to her hair and, as he raised his head, he brought her mouth to his. He wasn’t content with a peck this time. He moved his lips against hers, slowly, savouring the kiss.

“That alright?” he asked in a breath.

She nodded and pressed forward. She deepened the kiss as he reclined. They kissed to their heart’s content. Whenever they broke for air, and she smiled at him with heavy-lidded eyes, he had to remind himself it wasn’t a dream. He couldn’t wait to hold her and kiss her again tomorrow and the day after and all the ones after that for as long as she would let him.

Hannah straddled his legs. Her long hair tickled his chest. It took all his willpower not to grab her hips and tug her down on his erection.

“Anything else you want to clarify?” she asked

“I think I’m in love with you, Hannah.”

Judging by her widening eyes, she hadn’t expected such a serious answer. He hadn’t expected to say it either.  Momentarily, he  feared he’d ruined the moment and scared her, but her features softened in a warm smile.

“Me too.”

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so incredibly happy. So light. And it occurred to him he wasn’t falling in love so much as he was rising in love. He guffawed at his own silly thought.

“A smile looks good on you,” she said.

“You look good on me.”

She shook her head fondly and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around her, thoroughly snogging her.

He slipped a hand under the shirt, fingers splayed over the dip in her lower back. A groan of surprise escaped his lips when she pressed her hips to his. Even through two layers of underwear, he could feel her heat.

“It’s been a while,” he said in a hoarse voice. “For me too.” He quirked an eyebrow and she added, “I mean for real, with someone I care about.”

“Okay.”

“Do you want to wait?”

“No.”

“Oh, thank god.”

Hardy rolled over her and peppered kisses down her throat and collarbone. Fumbling with the shirt, he finally accessed her breasts. He licked a line up her sternum and took each nipple between his lips. Hannah squirmed under him, fingers raking through his hair.

He tentatively touched between her legs, inner thighs first, then grazing over her underwear. Her jerking hips and needy pants encouraged him. He removed her knickers throwing them over his shoulder, much to her amusement. He sat on his his heels, and with his forearms under her knees, he yanked her closer. He dropped butterfly kisses along her calves, making Hannah giggle.

“I need you,” she moaned, reaching into his pants.

Her hand on his cock made him curse. He thrusted into her fist until she guided him to where she needed him. As he pushed in her, he entwined their fingers above her head. And there was that carnal pleasure, but most of all there was closeness. Every nerve ending suffused with the smell and sight and touch of the other. And it was in a tight embrace, all clawing fingers, salty kisses and smacking skin, that they found bliss.

(They missed breakfast.)

[ahickeyfromsawicki]

noah fence but your sister needs to shut up. i get that she’s grieving and i’m sorry that you’re both going through this but you literally busted your ass to support and help your family, and after what happened you don’t deserve to be spoken to like that especially if what she’s saying is a lie 👀

she was angry with me because i didnt know if i could handle going to the funeral home to make arrangements and to her that meant i wouldnt step up and be there to support my dad ever. she just made me feel like a loser when ive actually done everything i could to help. i never did it for praise or anything because if the roles were reversed my parents would obviously have done the same for me, but to say i did nothing just really hurt me and i feel like shes going to make this so much harder on me than it already is

[fanfiction-mania]

Lucky im in Love (Chapter 24)

eight years later*

p.o.v Rocky

its Ell and I's eight year aniversary and we now have a little 7 year old girl named kayla jane Lynch- Ratliff who is an amputee, long story short she had a birth defect that caused her to have to get the lower half of her left leg amputated but ellington and i still love her to death anyways. we began the adoption process about two weeks after we came back from our honeymoon an we finally got to take her home three months after that. currently i am lying in bed with my arms around my husband who is still asleep. im not asleep right now because my body has gotten used to being woken up by our daughter around now but ellington on the other hand i guess not. "babe, you might want to wake up now if you dont want kayla to scare you awake" i said party jokingly but also as an actual warning because i know he wouldnt be happy if she jumped on him when he was half asleep. all of a sudden kayla came running in at top speed jumping on the bed landing right on ellington's stomach causing him to groan. "i warned you babe" i said laughing and grabbing our daughter off of him. "i love the two of you so much" i said kissing them both on the heads.

p.o.v Riker

Even though Rydel and i cant actually get married legally so i decided to give her a ring anyways and we had made up ou own vows to say to eachother anyways so that way its kind of as if we are married. we decided to do that about a year after our son james was born. james is currently seven turning eight soon so about the same age as his cousin kayla. after that since rydel and i knew that we wanted two kids we decided to wait a while before having another one because for the first little while it was quite a handfull taking care of just james. when james was three we decided that it was a good time to start trying for a second kid and after about three months of trying she got pregnant with our daughter jade making her three now. overall we are one happy little family.

p.o.v Ryland

Dove and i got married two years ago and let me tell you, these last two years have been the best two years of my life. Dove is currently 8 months pregnant and its a boy. as soon as we found out that it was going to be a boy we instantly started going through names to see what we thought would be a good name for him. after about a month or so of trying to think of names we agreed on Jordan. currently Dove and i are talking and singing to jordan like we do every once in a while to help him recognize our voices.

*one month later*

Dove is now going into labour so i have to rush her to the hospital. once we got there i parked as quickly as i could and we rushed inside. as soon as we got inside a bunch of doctors rushed to dove's side. one of them brought her a wheel chair and i helped her sit into it. after she was seated comfortably in the wheelchair she was rushed into a labour room. we have been told that she is only about three centimetres dialated right now but you have to be at least ten to start pushing. by the time the doctor came in to check on Dove the doctor told us that dove was now seven centimeters dialated. after being told this the doctor then left for another fifteen minutes or so and when the doctor came back he quickly checked and spoke. "its time!"

*after dove gave birth to jordan*

by now everyone was in the waitingroom of the hospital waiting for us. after dove held jordan for a minute for the first time the doctor took him away from her to get him all cleaned up. after the doctor had jordan all cleaned up he wrapped him in a blanket and handed him back to dove. "ill give you guys a moment with the baby while i go get the papers." dove and i both looked at the doctor as he spoke. "thankyou" we both said quietly to him after noticing that jordan had fallen asleep. after the doctor had come back with the papers he quickly filled them out and then asked us what we had decided to name our child. "what have you two decided on naming the child?" the doctor asked. in unison Dove and i answerd the doctor's question. "Jordan Xavier Lynch" after that the doctor wrote the name on the birth certificate and left the room again. "i love you" i said to both Dove and Jordan. "i love you too Ryry" dove said.

p.o.v Ross

if you are wondering what happened to laura, i dumped her two years ago. i didnt dump her for the reason you are probably thinking. you are probably thinking she cheated on me or i just didnt love her anymore or anything. thats not it at all. infact she respects me for breaking up with her due to the reason. i dumped her because i realized i was gay. surprisingly she didnt get mad at me or anything. she actually hugged me. i am currently living with my boyfriend alexander in a two bedroom apartment near my family. we actually only moved in together recently. and we havent even actually been dating long but we made sure that we were really close before it got this far. "hey, babe?" alex said walking up to me nervously. "yes?" i said with worry filling my voice. "i need to tell you something that i have been keeping from you but please try not to get mad even though ive been keeping it from you. ive only kept it from you because i was scared how you would react because i know that this kind of information is a lot to take in so please try not to be mad." i looked at him as if he grew two heads. "how could i ever hate you? i would never hate you babe!" i said. "well what if i told you that i uh... wasnt born the way i am now?" he said just making me more confused. "what do you mean by that?" i asked. "Ross... I-i was born a girl" he said causing me to stand there in astonishment. "oh my god!" i said not knowing what else to say to my boyfriend. "exactly what i thought! your disgusted by me!" he said sounding hurt. "no no no oh my god babe you have it all wrong. i was just in shock. im so happy you told me, and besides if the roles were reversed i would have done the exact same thing" i said comforting my boyfriend. "i love you so much alex, and nothing, and i do really mean nothing will ever change that" with that i placed my hand at the back of his neck and kissed him with as much love and passion as i possibly could. "i love you too, so so much" Alex replied.

[missjackil]

Miss Jacki’s top 30 SPN Episodes

#1 Who We Are 12x22

For me, this was as close to perfect as an episode can be!! Both Sam girls and Dean girls should have enjoyed this, and it was bibro Heaven!! Hellers probably still talk about it as the worst episode ever or something hehe.  For starters, we have the boys trapped with Toni Bevell in the bunker. Locked in, no electricity, water, and the air is being pumped out, so of course theres pending doom. After trying to reset the machinery with a spell that failed, the bros try bashing down a wall. This was an awesome scene!! Whats not to love about Sam and Dean in single layers, being all strong and macho??  Exhausted, they sit together, dirty, sweaty, and tired. What an absolute beautiful sight!! When the boys sit together talking, you always have my full attention. Theyre feeling a little hopeless. This really could be the end. Sam opens up, maybe he feels more than a little guilty that things got to this point. Of course, its not his fault really, he didnt know the BMOL were brain washing mom, or had plans to exterminate the American Hunters, he just wanted to help make the world a better place. Sam gives a confession, that once he was in, he just followed, because it was easier than leading. Dean nods in agreement. They both probably liked just being told where to go and what to kill much more than telling others what to do.  So now the boys think theyve lost, and its not the “blaze of glory” theyve always imagined... until.... THE GRENADE LAUNCHER!!!  Toni thinks the boys are lunatics, and well... they are :D Big Beautiful and Dumb!!  They couldnt care less that the whole building might fall on their heads, If they go out, theyre going out with a bang, and on their own terms!! The exchange of looks Sam and Dean gave each other was nothing less than priceless. The grenade explodes, Sam instantly goes looking for Dean. Theres a big hole in the wall,, and no Dean, so he must have gotten out!! But oh shit, the hole collapses!! Sam goes into instant panic mode!! DEAN??? DEAN!!???? He can barely see, the air is thin, and he collapses on all 4s as he sucks all the oxygen thats left by hyperventilating. Just then the door opens and Dean walks in with a bloody busted leg and Sams face lights up. Dean greets him with “Hey Lunatic”” and all order in Sam’s life is restored. We fast forward to Jody’s house where Mary is tied up for attacking Jody. Sam calls other hunters to come help them take out the Brits. Atypical of Sam, he has a pretty long speech, but, he finally gets a good tag line. For years, all we had were things like “I lost my shoe” or “Im a whole new level of freak” but now we have “I want you to follow me” it hits me in the feels when I hear him say this. He’s come so far and grown so much in the last 12 yrs, that he can say these words in confidence. Dean was so proud! This lead to one of my favorite brohugs, that tied in a little bit with my 2nd fav episode, Swan Song (which Ill talk about tomorrow) In Swan Song, Dean was letting Sam go to do his quest on his own. Sam told him “If I do this, and triple lindy into that cage, you know Im not coming back” and Dean says “I know” but this time, Dean is sending Sam off on his quest and hugs him, and tells him “You come back” and Sam says “Promise” (ugggh my heart) seal that with a Winchester “I love you” which was “Bitch” “Jerk” and just the pause and the sweet grin on Sams face when Dean said it, you knew he knew Dean just told him he loves him <3 So Sam goes off.... meanwhile, Dean is now trying to talk to mom while in her head. My heart was flipping seeing chubby happy baby Sam, cooing and playing with his blanket. When Dean goes over to see him, he just seemed so happy to show big grown up Dean his blanket!! The only thing that would have made me feelier, is if Dean picked baby Sam up and cuddled him, and maybe kissed his head (but then I woulda just died and couldnt write this so...)

Sams battle with the brits, was a little lack luster, but its ok because Dean’s scene was awesome. He’s laying it out to Mom, this is whats what.... and instead of making it all about him, he made it about Sam. Basically “you left me with a responsibility I couldnt handle and look what it did to Sam???” I was full on sobbing when he told Mom that Sam was posessed by Lucifer, Tortured in Hell and lost his soul. Some of you got angry that Sam wasnt the one to tell her, but hello... this is Sam we’re talking about. Its never his thing to lay his load on someone else. Sometimes, maybe a little with Dean, but he just wouldnt give all this to his mother. But Dean would for him. She needs to know and Sam wont tell her, so Dean will. He tells Mary he hates her... he says it more than once. I feel it, it comes from his gut. Not just a knee jjerk reaction to anger. He IS feeling this. And Dean Winchester has the most open, and honest moment hes had in a long time, maybe in the whole series “I hate you.... and I love you. I cant.. I cant help it... youre my mom” and without a word of lie, Im crying as I write this. I may be 100% in love with Sam, but Dean is my buddy. Hes messed up and too violent sometimes, but he is so full of love it hurts me, and him too aparently. I know he and Sam have felt exactly this for each other a number of times. It reminds me of what Jared said about Sam and Dean at SDCC2017 “Sam and Dean love each other as much as its possible for two people to love each other... even when sometimes they hate each other a little”:True love is huge and confusing and uncontrolable, and everyone does stupid stuff when they love big. If youre one of those people waiting for and expecting a love that wont ever hurt like hell, you wont ever really experience love.  *ehem* where was I? Oh yes.... ok so, Where Sam and Dean both are at this point, is kind of a role reversal, Sam is doing the fighting and Dean is doing the curing. And this is really cool IMO. And I dont know if youve noticed, but they both had to stop being “them” for a second, and be the other instead. Dean has to get mom out of her head, Sam has to finish off the Brits in the US. if Sam were standing were Dean is right now, what would he do? He would forgive mom, and this is what Dean needs to do. If Dean were standing where Sam is, what would he do? He would trust himself, Sam and his friends, and tell the Brits to fuck off... and this is what Sam did. Sam has issues with second guessing and not trusting his own instincts... but this time he becomes Dean and just says “pass” shoots the computer and Jody kills Hess. (Sam shoulda but oh well) Back at the Bunker, Toni is dead YAAAY and now the fight with Ketch, and mom wakes up and kills him (ish) big win for the Winchesters!! But then comes maybe my favorite moment ever. Dean and Mom are talking, and Dean tells her theyre gonna start over and do it right. Mom is worried, “What about Sam? Im scared.... what if he cant forgive me” Sam walks in, the man  that just took out the big bad BMOL is so soft, and so sad “Mom... you dont have to be scared of me”  OMG FUCKING KILL ME!!! Dont be scared of this huge hulk of a man that kills bad guys and monsters every day and scares the hell out of demons... dont be scared Mom because he loves you. Your deal made his life a living hell, but he forgave you a long time ago. You didnt know what would happen, and hes done the same thing himself. He knows as well as anyone what stupid things we might do for love.  Mom hugs Sam and Sam just looks like the biggest teddybear ever. And if thats not enough, Dean comes in “Im glad youre back man” and hugs him too. Sams face while being wrapped in all this love. All for him!! The whole damn series could have ended there and Id be happy!!  This is why Who We Are is my favorite episode ever!!