#like... you can put it in your mouth but don't expect much enjoyment out of it

[true-blue-sonic]

Any thoughts on what would happen if Silver and Espio were both sick at the same time and the rest of the Chaotix had to be the ones to try and help them? (I am still sick I need to project my pain)

Okay, no, I honestly think that if both Silver and Espio are ill simultaneously, they're gonna do nothing but needle each other by accident. They're both already in a foul mood then, and they can't care for the other properly, and I figure they also just have very different ways of being ill. Espio might prefer just laying there pretending he is dead for three days straight, whereas Silver wants to go out and do things and act like everything is well while hacking his lungs out and barely being able to walk from the fever. And that is... not a good combi😅 They're might just get into more petty arguments than they have in their whole relationship during that week alone👀

As for Vector and Charmy, I figure the two of them do really want to help, but they also know better than to throw themselves into the thundercloud that holds one bedroom in its grasp (because of course Silver and Espio do want to stay together even if it makes them both mad, haha). And thus Es and Silv are mostly left to their own devices, for better or for worse. At least Vector knows how to make chicken noodle soup and prepare tea! And the work around the house gets kept up decently enough for a change too. Once Silver and Espio get better, I figure they do make up immediately again, though. They know the other means well, and that being ill and grumpy is a recipe for relationship disaster. And they're not actually mad at each other, because such a thing rarely happens. But Vector and Charmy are beyond relieved they're better and happy again! They mean well also, but playing nurse for two incredibly stubborn people with strong opinions to boot does not seem like something they'd be particularly good at.

[ixiot-ghostrebel]

Hello there sagau brain rot like in many sagau versions reader/creator are often to soft to kind to my taste and then Idea comes to my head what if creator reader shows his cruler uncaring side to the pepole he truly hates or thinks deserve thier wrath like I can image that in place of raiden shogun the creator kills Singniora after begin defeated by traveler, azar the grand sage after whole begin in that day loop, and scaramouche when he had audacity to think that by begin inside giant mech he is now a God becose even if the creator is the kindest begin in tevyat.....his wrath has no bounds

@zardas75 welcome back to my very dead mailbox LOL—Let me see what I can come up with with your brainrot.

I don't fully get the Raiden Shogun vs Signora part, so I'm going to (unfortunately) not include that in this post.

The Creator Being Moody Fr (Jkjk—Unless? 👀)

(Disclaimer: Might Be OOC & Spoilers to the Genshin Impact Archon Quest Lore!)

Boy oh boy...where to begin...

To put it simply: It's Azar's Fault. Blame and point your fingers to the rusty old man, bois, we ain't forgiving him any time soon. It all started with him.

The moment you saw him in the Archon Quest, you knew, without even needing the slightest hint of evidence, that you did not like him and he was sus.

And when things escalated throughout the Archon Quest, you swore so loudly it shook the entire nation of Sumeru, if not all of Teyvat.

Here were Some of the Sumeru People's Reactions:

Cyno

He finished his confrontation with Azar and was waiting outside when you swore like your life depended on it. During his entire time being under your presence, Cyno was aware of how much you hated the guy—every moment you had gotten, you were seething and spouting insults from your mouth about Azar.

Even the General Mahamatra was stunned and shocked to the very core. He didn't you could and would do this.

And when you made it clear that your tantrum was yet to end, Cyno just braced himself for the fate of Sumeru to be in your hands.

"At least Azar is truly facing the wrathful judgement of the gods..." he mutters to himself, trying to convince himself of the situation at hand.

(Meanwhile You in the background: "YOU MF HOW DARE YOU. HOW DARE YOUUUU I WILL F—KING KILL YOU IF YOU CONTINUE THIS YOU SON OF A B—")

Scaramouche & Nahida

(Decided to add them both here since It's the False God Fight. This is kinda for the sake of convenience—)

Nahida never knew such intense emotion could ever erupt from Their High, Almighty Grace, and here you are, cursing and insulting Scaramouche. It wasn't as bad as Azar's, since you weren't throwing in any "I will have your head by morning" or anything similar threats, but it was still pretty intense.

Scaramouche, on the other hand, has heard you yelling at the old man Azar, and he already been yelled at for—quote on quote—"killing Teppei" (REST IN PEACE, TEPPEI 😭), so he knows what your wrath was like.

He did not like it then, and he still doesn't like it now. That much was a solid fact. Nevertheless, he has an image to uphold, especially in front of that Buer.

"Their Almighty Grace is really mad..." Nahida thought as they were confronting Scaramouche. (Cue you in the background still insulting Azar) "And it seems they won't be forgiving Azar anytime soon..."

"So, Their Grace still hasn't let go of their grudge against me..." Scaramouche mutters to himself once he was out of the view of Their Almighty Grace in his mecha. "Tch. Whatever...I'll make them see my true potential one I've squashed these insects."

Dehya

She knew you were explosive. She's seen it happen by the way you were cheering to beat Rahman's ass and "save the kid's grandpa!"

She knew you were pretty emotional on behalf of them. She's pretty happy and honored about that—that means Teyvat meant a lot to you.

What she was not expecting was to hear you curse and scream at Azar at the top of your lungs, as if that was the only enjoyment you were able to indulge yourself in.

You sounded murderous, and yet here you were, just yelling. Dehya would've shrugged it off, since she understood getting things out of your system was good, but she was not expecting the world to shake with your voice.

She looks over at Rahman. "You think Their Grace is handling this well?" "Probably not...Hard to say, Dehya." "Well, we'll just have to wait it out, then. They'll get it out of their system...eventually..."

Dehya was not expecting to wait until after beating the False God for it to be truly over. Gosh, that was scary...

Tighnari

He sensed that you didn't like Azar the moment you saw him, and frankly, he's pretty glad you don't trust him too. What he wasn't expecting was your explosive personality.

For all the stories about the Almighty Creator's kind and gentle nature, you were ANYTHING but. And you were proving it HARD.

Tighnari thought he heard it all when he got struck by lightning. Boy, was he wrong, because you just one-upped his expectations with the amount of cussing, cursing, threats, and insults you were hurtling in one go, streaming out of your mouth like you were running a marathon with your words.

So here he was, waiting in some form of dread in Pardis Dhyai, waiting if you were going to strike down the Akademiya with your godly might.

"I hope they don't accidentally blow up all of Sumeru..." he mutters to himself as he prays to all the archons that the nation wouldn't be turned into water or something.

Alhaitham

He should have taken account of your behaviour to the plan. You did play a crucial part. That was the sole mistake he overlooked.

Then again...it didn't seem like you were doing anything other than yelling at Azar...So perhaps the plan wouldn't change all that much.

He should keep in mind of how reactive you are, though. You...remind of his roommate sometimes...

"Hm. It seems Their Grace has yet to let Azar go of their scandal." He says it so calmly as he waits in Aaru Village. Candace stands a few feet away, looking unsure of what was going on—and probably praying that Their Almighty Grace won't strike down Sumeru in their anger against the rogue Grand Sage.

And let's not talk about the Traveler or Paimon. Those two are both used to it and still terrified. But they're okay with you dw 👍

Ghost Rebel Side Notes: IM COMING BACK WOOO! I'm so excited! There's been quite a few more requests than I usually got back in the past, so I'm a little stoked. They'll be out real soon, but I hope you enjoy this one! Hopefully I'll have time to do them all! :D

✦ Check out The Ghost Rebel’s Blog Description & Info Page to See if Their Mailbox is Open! ✦

[pretty-little-mind33]

Count Alexei Vronsky x wife!reader

Summary: When Alexei brought you a kitten, he didn't think you would spend your entire time with her.

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: mild jealousy

~ i hope you like it <3 @vanessavampiaives ~

COUNT VRONSKY MASTERLIST

Count Alexei Vronsky doesn't usually have any reason to be jealous. 

He's devilishly handsome and incredibly wealthy, and more importantly, he has you. 

His lovely wife, whom he loves dearly and who he knows loves him just as much. Since you met him, he'd fallen for you hard and you remain the sun he revolves around. 

So, when he comes back home one evening with a small basket and calls your name, he's expecting you to greet him like you usually would: with a hug. 

Instead, just as you prepare to rush up and wrap your arms around his shoulders, you make a small squeal and cover your mouth as you see the basket. "Alexei, what is this?" you whisper as he chuckles and holds out the basket for you. 

You peer inside and when you pull up the blankets and see a small soft bundle of white fur, your heart almost explodes. You look up at your husband, a wide smile curling your lips. "Oh! Is that for me?" 

Alexei smiles. He kneels down to put the basket on the floor. You mimic him and watch happily as he gently picks up the kitten in his hands and lifts her out of the cushions in the basket. The kitten yawns, scrunching her little pink nose, and looks up, blinking with her blue eyes as she looks at you. 

"He's adorable," you say, moving your dress so you can fully sit on the floor. 

"She is all yours, my love," Alexei passes the kitten to you, joining you on the floor as he crosses his legs. "Do you like her?" he asks expectantly, leaning in and smoothing his knuckle under the kitten's chin. The small kitten meows, and you don't know if it is a sound of disapproval or enjoyment. 

You caress her carefully. She's so tiny in your arms. "I love her," you whisper, looking into your husband's eyes and sending him a sweet smile.

"What did I do to receive such a sweet present?" 

Alexei chuckles and stands up. He dusts his uniform and leans down, resting his hand under your chin to pull your head up to him. He kisses your forehead gently. "Do I need a reason to spoil my darling?" he teases, smirking a little before he adds, "I listen to you, you know. I know you've been wanting a cat for a while and I couldn't resist when I saw this precious little thing."

You cradle the kitten in your arms, eyes lighting up as you feel the small animal start to purr against your hands. "She's lovely, thank you," you say sincerely and Alexei's heart swells seeing the pretty smile that gracious your lips. He tucks some hair behind your ear and hums warmly. 

His happiness is short-lived considering all you talk about for the next week is Princess. He's convinced you've spent more of your time petting that cat than talking with him.

It's a Sunday morning and you're sitting on the couch with Princess curled up in your lap as you scratch behind her ears. You're humming softly, whispering praises as she purrs. 

Alexei walks in, adjusting the cuffs of his suit and his eyes narrow when he sees you. He sighs and leans against the wall, crossing his arms. "You know you don't have to be with her all the time," he states, his voice a little strained.

Your expression twists into concern and you look up at your husband. "What do you mean?" you ask quietly, continuing to caress Princess's fur. 

Alexei sighs again, this time walking over and sitting next to you. "I mean you're always with her. Always. She sleeps in between us in our bed goddamnit!" he runs a hand through his blond curls, seeming exhausted and his curse earns him a frown. "And it would all be okay, but it's been days. And I miss you."

You catch on to his tone and smirk. "Honey, please tell me you aren't jealous of a kitten, are you?"

Alexei's cheeks turn crimson and he coughs. "Of course, I'm not, that would be ridiculous."

"Seems like you are," you giggle, scratching Princess's ear one last time before picking her up and placing her down at your feet. Completely unbothered by the change, Princess starts to lick and clean her leg.

You turn to Alexei, gently ruffling his hair. "All you had to say was that you wanted some pets too and I would have happily given you some," you joke with a smile.

He pushes your hand away, still embarrassed. However, his chest feels full as he enjoys your attention. He's like a starved man and he'll take whatever he can have. "Don't laugh at me, love."

You look up at him, running your finger across his jaw. "You're cute when you're jealous."

Alexei rolls his eyes and leans down to capture your lips in his. He kisses you deeply and then mumbles against your lips, "I love you. I absolutely adore you. I worship you, my dear."

You feel your cheeks becoming warm at this and you kiss him back. "I love you too, you silly man," you say after a moment, pulling away. Your words are interrupted by Princess jumping onto Alexei's lap. He looks down at the small animal, unsure what to do as she curls up into a small ball. Your smile widens. "She likes you," the happiness in your voice fills Alexei with warmth. 

He brings his large hand over Princess's head and starts to pet her. "I will admit, she's very cute," he whispers and then looks at you from the corner of his eye, smirking, "Although, not cute enough to warrant ignoring your husband."

You swat his arm, frowning, "Oh shush," you stare up at him fondly, "You must know I love you more than a cat, right?”

Alexei leans over, careful not to disturb Princess, and kisses your lips. "Mmm, if you say so, my lovely," he says, smiling against your lips. 

You pull away, that adorable frown Alexei guiltily loves appearing in between your eyebrows. "I mean it," your voice is like velvet and Alexei's hand finds your cheek. His thumb caresses your skin and you subconsciously move into his touch.

"I know you do love," he murmurs, "I'm just teasing you."

You smile at him, your eyes shining. Just like the sun, he thinks, and for a moment he feels blinded by your beauty and then kisses you again.

[eustasskidagenda]

Hi! This is my first time requesting, could I ask for some headcanons of Zoro, Law and Kidd with reader who was selective mutism?

Hi, sure thing! I'm sorry for the delay, but here we go. I hope the outcome will meet your expectations, thank you for requesting. ☆

☆Zoro, Law & Kid with a s/o who has selective mutism

CW : g/n reader, Kid has a filthy mouth 

WC : 1,2k

Zoro 

It would be quite a challenge for Zoro, to be honest. 

Zoro is not really talkative. So at first, he wouldn't notice that you're facing selective mutism. He would assume that you are a stoic and reserved person, just like him. However, he would come to the realization that it's deeper. When he realizes it's selective mutism...

… He would feel a bit confused and helpless, especially if you're not comfortable with him. Is he to blame for it? He wants to make you feel safe. So first thing first, he would ask for Chopper's help, or maybe Robin. 

Zoro is maybe uncomfortable with emotions, but he's loyal and always there to support his loved ones. This man is so protective and serious. With someone like him, the silence is always enjoyable, not weird or unusual. It would give you a feeling of safety. 

As a pragmatic person, Zoro would also try to find solutions, such as communicating through gestures, maybe. Whenever you talk to him, his heart would melt. He feels privileged to hear the sound of your voice. It's both beautiful and soothing.

Zoro will quietly be supportive when you're with others. As long as you don't seem in need of his help, he would just shut up and let you do your thing. If you want to communicate with others, give it a shot. If you want to stay silent, that's fine. However, if you appear stressed or uncomfortable, Zoro would be there in a second to reassure you. 

"You don't have to force yourself. It's fine. You gave your all. 

I think Zoro would consider your struggles with communication like he considers his fighting style: you need to train. If you want to open up, he would love to help you. He would assist you in slowly but surely pushing past your limits. "Maybe it'll take time, but I know you can do it, I trust you."

Zoro values so much effort and practice that he would be really moved by your progress. Even though he's not really expressive, you can tell how proud he is. The soft expression in his eyes is all you need to see.

Law

Law has a quiet demeanor. He doesn't speak much about himself, his plans, or basically, anything that is stuck in his mind. However, he understands that there is a distinction between being reserved and selective mutism. He would quickly realize that you're not just shy.

Although he's not a psychologist, he would still try to understand why you have selective mutism. First, because he's a doctor and also because he's curious about that kind of thing. If you're not willing to speak up about this, he won't force you to do so. He's well aware that selective mutism can sometimes hide something traumatic, and well, Law knows a lot about trauma. He doesn't want to remind you of dark memories.

"Don't worry, y/n-ya. I won't put pressure on you."

If you cannot communicate with him, Law would try to find a way to communicate with you. Maybe through writing, sign language, or even drawing, if you want. He's good at finding solutions and he knows a few things about selective mutism. 

If you can't communicate with others, Law will try to keep you in a safe environment. He knows it's pointless to confront you with people and he doesn't want to make you feel more anxious. But he would try to introduce you to trustworthy people, such as Bepo, Sashi, or Penguin. He would ask his friends to be nice and patient with you. If someone tries to be mean to you, Law would be really mad and probably room, shambles their body for a few hours as a punishment.

He respects your silence. Law would never force you to communicate or push you out of your comfort zone. He would be there to support you during both good and bad times. Every time you talk to someone you're not really comfortable with, Law would have a proud grin on his face. 

"See, you did it! You're incredible, y/n-ya."

Kid

Well, don't worry, he can talk for the both of you.

He's a man of action, and honestly, he struggles to understand what's going on and why you're so quiet. Sure, he's used to calm people, and Killer is one of them. But talking to everyone is not a problem for Killer, he's just introverted. Your selective mutism would be a challenge for our dear angry tulip.

Kid is loud and both possessive and protective. However, he hates assisting others. He thinks you're strong enough to take care of yourself. He would never be the one to babysit you. Just watch from a distance to see if you're doing okay, especially in stressful situations. If someone dares to mock you, we all know what's going to happen. Kid is easily pissed off: he hates being mocked, or when someone makes fun of his loved one.

"Come here y/n, I'll deal with those fucking assholes." Before grabbing you by the wrist and bringing you closer to him. So now you're stuck against his chest, but is it really a problem? 

Honestly, if you're struggling to talk to Kid, he would consider the whole thing as a challenge. He's a marginalized person, his crew is full of marginalized people, so your selective mutism is not really a problem for him. His pride is the main issue: if you doesn't feel safe in his presence, it's a problem for his ego. 

"What's the matter anyway, y/n, why can't you speak?" 

In your presence, Kid would try (keyword: try) to talk more quietly. He doesn't want to freak you out with his rude behavior. Just imagine the loud and rude Eustass Kid softening in your presence. How sweet. I'm also pretty sure he would love to praise you with your favorite flower/animal made of metal. Imagine a beautiful flower blooming or a fluffy puppy dancing with joy while you speak. 

Don't say that the big, scary Eustass Kid can craft such lovely things to anyone. 

Once you're comfortable with him… Kid would just grin cockily. Damn. He would be extremely proud. Like, genuinely proud. Proud of you, because you did it. And also pleased with himself, because he won this challenge. He would feel his heart melting and pounding. "Y/N can talk to me, see, I'm the best!" (Yelling to absolutely everyone, obviously)

Kid Pirates are a big family. Kid may not be fully aware of what to do with someone who is facing selective mutism, but his crew will take care of you. They won't put pressure on you, not because they're scared of Kid, but because everyone in the crew has their own problems and it's alright. 

They would all make an effort to ensure your safety and be patient with you. Just like their captain, if you end up in a stressful situation, they would help you as best they can. 

I love them so much, help.

[bandgie]

Desire

President!Jongho x fem!reader

Synopsis: The company dinner was meant to destress your busy corporate life, but it seems like you'll have to make room for dessert.

warnings: slow burn? public fingering, cum eating/swapping, pussy play mostly, intoxication mentions but everyone is pretty much sober

song! 3.7k words

Choi Jongho is not necessarily hated, but he isn't liked either. There's an air around him that screams dominance and demands authority. He strives for perfection and expects everyone to give their all. As stubborn as he is, even with as much unwarranted fear he instills in everyone, you respect his drive.

You're on the opposite spectrum of Mr. Choi. A bit more lenient with the staff, not as ambitious, not as...scary as Seonghwa has once said. Despite the differences, you hardly bump heads with Jongho. Working so close with him, you the director and him the president, you've got to see sides of him others don't.

A more human side. 

Working in a corporation may be exhausting, especially in a law firm, but connecting with your subordinates is what makes it enjoyable. Though Mr. Choi doesn't share the same sentiment, you think he secretly enjoys the fruit basket you leave on his desk each time he secures a client.

You may not be able to buy Jongho another one of those baskets this time though. Stress eats at you from the most recent decisions of a particular client. They go against your financial advising, blaming you for the bankruptcy they will most likely endure. It'll make a bad name for the firm and you don't want to imagine Mr. Choi's displeasure. 

"What a bunch of fucking idiots," you groan under your breath. 

Yunho lifts his head from his computer at your mumbling. He peers over the little wall that divides your desks and waits until you notice him. When your eyes meet his brown ones, he raises an eyebrow, "Who?"

You scrunch your nose as you answer, "That Dreamy Day company. They're complaining about losing money, but it's literally their fault. Putting stocks when they shouldn't and over-drafting loans. So they hire us to make sure they don't go out of business right? But they do the opposite of what we're advising them to do. So they're wasting even more money and blaming me! Me! You should see the emails, Yunho. They're a bunch of fucking assholes too."

From the stunned look on Yunho's face, you think you've said too much. You close your eyes and let out a deep sigh, reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose, "Sorry. I'm just stressed." Yunho nods understandingly and shrugs, "Aren't we all? I think you'll be happy to know that Mr. Choi said he'll pay for the company dinner tonight."

This makes you perk your head up, eyes wide open. "Dinner? Tonight? No no no I can't do that. I have too much work and-"

"And you'll have to save it for tomorrow. Boss's words, not mine." Yunho smiles at your defeated look, an innocent gaze in his eyes. "You need this." He continues. "We need this. At least one day to relax. If Mr. Boss can tell you're overworked, then there's a problem."

You sigh again, though it's not as heavy. Since you've been working overtime to create a business strategy for Dreamy Day, you've only been eating takeout and convenience store food. Maybe it would do you good to eat something cooked with someone else's money. 

"I guess there's nothing I can do then. What restaurant?"

-

The restaurant, Arriba, smells of spices and meat. The warm lights make you feel cozy and you enjoy the subtle chatter from the people around you. An abundance of food sits in the middle of your table, already halfway gone. Yunho's face is flushed from alcohol, but he still takes another swig of his drink.

"Damn Seonghwa! I didn't think you'd eat this much. You're so thin!" You chuckle as the said man blushes from the attention. He shoves another piece of cooked meat in his mouth, "I eat well."

"Ah, that's nothing," Jongho gestures to Seonghwa's plate. "In college, Park used to apply for cook positions just to eat the nightly leftovers. He used to purposely make the customers' food wrong so he could remake it and eat the one they sent back."

That sputters a laugh from you. One reason is that Seonghwa's gluttony runs deeper than you thought, the other now knowing that the senior associate used to flip burgers. 

"No way," you manage to subdue your laughter. "Did they ever find out?"

Seonghwa, even slightly tipsy, doesn't like to be the center of attention. He picks up his bottle and takes a strategically long drink just to avoid your question. However, he can't escape your curious eyes waiting for an answer. He finally sets his drink down and swallows loudly, "Yes...I didn't last longer than four months."

Yunho laughs at the honesty, wrapping an arm around Seonghwa's shoulder. "It's okay Hwa. We don't want to pay for leftovers anyway."

You chuckle at their interaction before glancing at Jongho beside you. Only his ears and what's exposed on his neck are flushed. Rather than the serious look you're used to, his eyes are softer. There's a sense of calamity rolling off him that makes you look at him in a different light. Even if he's working in such a high position, you can't help but notice how young he is in a moment like this.

"You too Jongho, you can handle your liquor pretty good." You notice your mistake a bit too late. Your boss is pretty stern about properly addressing him and even outside of work you think he might correct you. Instead, he turns his head to you and his lips twist into a smirk. 

Your heart flutters. 

Jongho raises his shot glass to eye level and looks at it almost affectionately, "Alcohol is a man's best friend." He brings the glass to his lips and shoots it back. He licks his lips and lets out a satisfied sigh once he's gulped, "Every good president should know how to drink well."

The night continues with drunk laughter and playful banter. Though you've worked with these men for years, you feel as though you're finally getting to know them as they share stories of their youth. Yunho is obsessed with Harry Potter, Seonghwa prefers Star Wars and Jongho...Jongho...

Was he always this handsome? Did he always have such a cute, gummy smile? It has to be the light bouncing off his tan skin that captivates you. It's the warm food and cozy environment that makes you sit hip-to-hip with him. That yearning for contact is because of the soju. The way you shiver when his hands brush against yours when he reaches for seconds is because you're just hyper-sensitive.

It's anything but him, you remind yourself. 

It's a mantra you repeat while Jongho pays for bills, while he holds the door open for you four to shuffle out of, as he asks if everyone wants to go to a bar. 

You blink yourself out of your thoughts, "Huh?"

"It's a shame to waste the night. Plus we don't do this often. But I understand if it's too late for you guys," he looks amongst the three of you, waiting for an answer. 

Even if you weren't suddenly crushing on your boss, it would be foolish to turn down a higher-up's offer. Yunho and Seonghwa seem to think the same thing as they agree quickly. "I could go for another round," Yunho nods. 

Jongho smiles in a way that makes you tremble so violently that Seonghwa asks if you want his jacket. 

"Sounds good," Jongho claps his hands a few times. "I'll keep a tab open, but do your best to remember we have work tomorrow.

-

It's a completely different environment in the bar compared to Arriba. Seonghwa mentioned the place MATZ his old friend runs to go to. Maybe you expected some level of decency, but you're shocked to see what feels like hundreds of people standing, drinking, dancing. Then the foul smell of beer and what you hope isn't vomit fills your nose. You cover your mouth and blink away your tears. 

The crowd eyes the four of you judgingly as you push your way to an empty booth. It's mostly likely because of your attire. While everyone wears either skin-tight or little clothing, you four wear business casual. 

You jump when a hand settles on the small of your back. You're about to, not so nicely, tell the perv to keep their hands to themselves when it's Jongho you see close behind you. He doesn't so much as look at you when you peer up at him, face heating. You whip your head back around and let him guide you to a dirty, but empty table.

''I think this is a club rather than a bar, Mr. Park!" Jongho shouts over the loud music.

Mr. Park...oh he's pissed. 

Seonghwa's eyes widen in fear as he sneaks glances at you. Help!

You would rather not risk enduring the anger of Jongho, but Seonghwa has such a begging look in his eyes that you cave. "Maybe this is a good thing!" you shout in Jongho's ear. "I mean, you took us out to relax, right? And like you said, we don't do this often."

Jongho raises an eyebrow as he turns to face you. Since you were leaning in his ear, his face is mere inches away from your own. You swear you can feel his warm breath on your lips. Jongho looks at you up and down in a way that makes your skin crawl. He isn't just looking at you, he's observing you. You think he's debating on demoting you when he laughs instead, "Using my own words against me, huh? Shouldn't expect anything less than my director."

Seonghwa visibly relaxes at the diffused situation, but now you're the tense one. All you can stare at is Jongho. Different lights, different smells, different places, yet he still captivates you. You tremble at his intense stare, feeling the way his eyes eat you.

His tongue pokes out to moisten the side of his bottom lip.

"Imma gets some drinks," Yunho's announcement breaks the stare-off. Jongho turns his attention to the tall man and reaches into the pocket of his coat. You watch as his nimble fingers dig through his wallet to pull out the company card and hand it to Yunho. 

"Just put it under my name," he instructs.

Yunho scoots until he's out of the booth, leaving you three at the table before someone catches Seonghwa's eye.

"Oh!" He quickly shuffles to his feet. "I see my friend. I'm going to say a quick hi. If you'll excuse me." Jongho gives a nod before Seonghwa disappears into the sea of bodies. 

Then there were two. 

You don't know where to look, where to pretend to look. You choose the dance floor where people shamelessly rub against each other, spilling drinks and hollering with deaf-tone singing. It's somewhat overstimulating to your semi-sober mind, but it's better than the burning presence of Jongho beside you.

"Do you like to dance?" that burning presence speaks. A part of you wants to pretend that you didn't hear him over the loud atmosphere, but you know better than that.

"Yes!" You yell in his direction but refuse to meet his eyes. "I don't go out anymore, but I danced when I did." You see the outline of Jongho nodding. Awkwardly, you meet his eyes, "Do you like to dance?"

He shrugs, "I don't care much for it. I prefer singing."

A look of surprise molds into your face, "Singing? Since when?"

"Since forever," he smiles. "I should have chosen a karaoke bar instead. Not this shit fest." Jongho laughs at his crudeness, waiting for your response. 

"I mean, it would have been more quiet. That's for sure!" You smile at his joyful expression. "But I don't mind this. When Yunho comes back with drinks, I think we'll be having a much better time."

Jongho nods, but there's a somewhat youthful expression in his eyes you don't think you've ever seen. 

"Maybe we should go dance," you propose. "Just until Yunho comes back." There's an immediate feeling of regret when the question slips from you. You want to blame the atmosphere for getting to your head, the drunk energy making its way to your veins. 

But when you see him smile curiously when you see him nod, when you grab him by the wrist and lead him to the middle of the floor, you're buzzing with excitement you know is far from those things. 

Jongho is a better dancer than he claimed to be. He runs his hands up and down your torso, pulling you close or moving his hips with yours. He even trails the tips of his fingers down your neck when you tilt up to the ceiling.

Yunho and Seonghwa are more than likely back at the booth, wondering where you two went. If they were to see you dancing like this, to see Jongho's moving against you this way, you think they'd never let you hear the end of it. 

You can't seem to find the energy to care though. Not when Jongho's letting you grind against his thighs. He encourages it, keeping his hands at your waist to help you ride him. The two of you have already crossed so many lines by doing this, you might as well see how far you can get. 

You can feel his erection through his work pants, poking your leg. As much as you want to twist a hand between and 'help,' it would be too obvious. You settle with feeling your wet underwear rub against your cunt, staining your pants. 

Good thing it's already dark out. 

Jongho lets you rest your head in the crook of his neck. He can hear every pant, every whine, feel the way your tongue laps at his sweat. He can feel your warm cunt through the fabric, but he doubts it'll be enough for him.

He snakes a hand between your bodies undo the button of your slacks and finds the zipper. 

"Jongho!" You gasp in his ear. You glance down to see him working his fingers down until they cup over your clothed mound. You tremble in his hold, softly moaning at the contact before you come to your senses. 

"There are people!"

"There are."

"They're gonna see!"

"They might."

You're going to reply when his hand rubs up and down. Your hips rock before you can think, chasing the pleasure Jongho so willingly gives you. 

"I don't know why you're worried." He shakes his head. "You're so wet. Did you want me to ignore that?"

The only response he gets is soft moans in his ear. He giggles at your desperation, opting to move his palm in circles. 

"I saw the way you were looking at me during dinner," Jongho admits. "At first, I thought it was because of the drinks. You know how some people get like when they have one too many. But now that we're here, I wonder if you've been wet this whole time."

Were you that obvious? Could Jongho see you eye-fucking him? Could he feel the desire that wrecked you these last hours? He must, even if it weren't for his confession. Jongho must feel the same way if he's letting you hump his hand without care.

"Mmm sorry. Sorry," it's all breathy against his skin when you speak. "D-don't fire me."

That sputters a laugh out of him. You grip onto him a little tighter by the shoulder. His hand is drenched, and it's so easy to slide back and forth on it. But the fabric of your underwear is starting to get irritating. It's too rough on your sensitive flesh and you're trying to slip his hand inside your panties. 

Once his laughter subdues, he smiles down at your frenzied state. "I wasn't even thinking that. I'm sure HR would get a laugh out of my director humping my hand like a bunny."

You whine in his neck, both from embarrassment and need. Even as he teases you, Jongho relents and slips his fingers past your panties. The feeling of his bare fingers rubbing against your cunt makes you shiver, humming in satisfaction.

Jongho runs two of his fingers up and down your slit, getting familiar with how your body reacts to his touches. He moves the pad of his fingers up to rub circles over your clitoris. You let out an airy moan, thankful for the loud music concealing your mewls.

"I won't tell them," Jongho promises. "A little secret between us two."

The people around you have gotten the clue that you two are more than dancing. Some move to a different spot, others giggle at the desperation, but most roll their eyes as if this is a common occurrence at MATZ. Either way, you don't care. Not when your boss's fingers dip between your folds, spreading your lips and using his thumb to apply pressure on your clit. 

You could cum from how Jongho plays with your pussy alone, but your walls keep clenching down on air. It leaves you feeling frustrated with nothing inside you. His fingers feel thick, they can do the job.

"Can...can we keep another secret?" You bite on your lower lip, looking up at Jongho whose eyes never left your face. The colors of the strobe lights bounce beautifully on his face, capturing his already-knowing smile. "Depends. You have to tell me first."

Strategically, you trail kisses from his neck to his ear, biting on his earlobe as you whisper, "I wanna feel your fingers in me. Creaming around them. God, fuck, I just want to cum on them."

That playful air around Jongho seems to darken, turning into something akin to desire. He teases your entrance with the tips of his fore and middle finger. Circling and barely dipping them in before pulling away. "I thought there were people?" He flashes a gummy smile. 

"Jonghooo."

He smiles wider at your whining, but it's what makes him oblige. Two thick fingers finally make their way inside you carefully. He slides them in with ease from how wet his entire hand already was and with how relaxed your body is. He slightly wiggles his fingers to find a comfortable position for both of you, adding to the already stretching stimulation. 

You clench around his digits eagerly, loudly moaning from finally being somewhat filled. Everything about him is warm, from the fingers finding a pace, to his palm that smacks against your entire pussy. Slick drips down your thighs, collecting onto the fabric on your work pants. If you thought they were soaked before, they are utterly drenched now.

Jongho doesn't bother with a slow pace. He can tell from how you're bouncing on his hand that you need more than what you started with. With his free hand, he hooks one of your legs up to rest on his hip so he has better access. With this opening angle, it's easier for him to piston his fingers in and out of you.

It's loud, it's wet, it's obscene. 

You should feel disgusted or ashamed at the very least. But Jongho's so good at finger fucking you. He doesn't seem to mind your loud whines, your rocking hips, and his dirty sleeves getting wetter by the second. After all, a good subordinate follows in the footsteps of their superiors.

His fingers aren't necessarily long, but they still build that fire in your belly. Your orgasm approaches, affecting how your riding turns into messy humping; How you make a conscious effort to try and quiet your louder moans. Your walls repeatedly tighten around Jongho and he drives it home.

Harshly, Jongho drives his fingers as far as they can go, wiggling just the tips to prod that rough spot in your pussy. It feels as though it's in your stomach, reaching even deeper than you know is possible. Your hips come to a complete stop, opting to spasm uncontrollably. 

A few more harsh pumps, some clit play with Jongho's thumb, and you feel yourself coming undone. The tightly coiled pleasure blossoms in your stomach, spreading its heat to your legs, your chest, and your sensitive cunt. You gasp in his ear, torn between staying awkwardly slightly or embarrassingly loud.

Jongho decides for you. He captures your parted lips in a messy kiss, eating your wails and moans. You pant in his mouth, trying to match his stroking tongue with yours. It's difficult to kiss him back when your orgasm floods your senses, but Jongho hardly seems to care about your tired lips.

You squeal when he gently pulls his fingers downwards. The drag makes your eyes roll, still delicate at every move. Jongho doesn't take them out all the way, but instead drives them forward. He maintains a slowly pumping speed to help you ride off your high.

It's overwhelming to have both your lips occupied, so you make the difficult choice to pull away from Jongho's kiss and rest your head on his chest. He frowns at first, but upon seeing your droopy eyelids and constant moans, he accepts that he's drawing your orgasm too far out.

That doesn't mean you don't whine when he finally pulls his fingers out, cunt cold and empty. 

With hazy eyes, you watch as he brings his fingers up to eye level, glistening in the artificial lighting. Wordlessly, he traces those same fingers across your bottom lip, wiping your essence in the process. You open your mouth so he can further push them between your lips. 

"How do you taste?" Jongho questions, eyes stuck on where your tongue swirls around. 

You hum in response, leaning forward to reach his fingers to the knuckles. Slowly, you pull away, letting his fingers out with a 'pop!'

"Try for yourself."

You snake a hand around his neck and bring him forward, putting your tongue in his mouth immediately. Jongho groans at the taste, cupping your face with both hands as he pulls you closer. He digs his tongue deeper and sucks on yours to get every drop of cum you have. It's not until you're gasping for air that he pulls away, licking his lips. 

"Fuck," he swears. "Hiding that from me all this time, huh Director?"

With glossy, cum-stained lips, you smile. "Didn't think it was part of the job."

As if on cue, Jongho's phone begins to vibrate between your bodies. He removes a hand from your face to reach his pocket and look at the caller. He glances at you and then at the phone before silencing the call.

"We should find our table."

a/n: omfg I have been so dry im so sorry school is kicking MY ASS I have like 1000 words due every week for one class then 300 a week for another and there's so much articles to read omfg ANYWHO I hoped you all liked this one!!!

[ringsreforged]

Natalie's *deep* Haladriel thoughts - BEWARE

Pau - When you read this later, let me know if you want me to move it to my personal account, yeah? If it even still exists...

I’m not really sure what this post is going to end up being. A defence of the show and the separation? In part! A critique of the show based off leak spoilers and my own gut feeling? For sure! A desperate ramble in an attempt to get my head in order? Absolutely!

I will say before we dive in that I’m absolutely a Haladriel shipper, but the way I ship isn’t always in line with fandom. I ship what I see as part of the narrative because it’s the narrative, and everything else is a bonus. I make this distinction because I think this is why I’m so okay with a lack of scenes when some others are not, and I don’t want to come across preachy. I don't think I'm in any way superior for this by the way. In fact, I wish I could be more *normal*!!!!

If you came to this show for Haladriel alone, and simply want to see them share scenes week to week – that’s your prerogative. I’m not trying to say you shouldn’t feel that way. What I might try to say is that I don’t think that makes the shows bad or suggests that the writers have baited with this relationship. I think that’s ultimately what I find frustrating…

But anyway, let’s get into whatever this is. A reflection on expectations, a five-season arc, and those STUPID spoiler leaks…

AND THERE WILL BE SPOILERS. STAY AWAY. HISS.

Alright, so this post is mostly brought to you by a sinking feeling I have that the leak spoilers are real. Because everything in that episode 7 promo matches up.

STOP READING if you don’t want to know the spoilers. And honestly? STOP READING IF YOU THINK YOU WANT TO KNOW because living with this knowledge has truly made this season less enjoyable for me (credit to it, then, because I still think it’s incredible). IF I’M MAKING YOU PANIC, STILL STOP READING because there very much is a world where these spoilers aren’t that bad in context…but I prefer to keep my expectations low…

Have you gone???

HAVE YOU GONE?????

SPOILER TALK

Okay.

So, the leak spoilers say that there is no kiss between Sauron and Galadriel (which, honestly, I have no great issue with – more to come on that later). Instead, the kiss is ELROND AND GALADRIEL, and I absolutely do take issue with this.

I can only hope and PRAY that it works in context, but I can’t get my head around it. And yet, the promo…it’s all falling into place. Elrond will be sent to discuss terms with the orcs before the battle. He’ll see Galadriel in chains, and he’ll ask for a moment to say goodbye. Adar will allow it because he’s a gent like that. This is where we get the chin touch with the thumb everyone speculated over and then…HE LEANS IN AND KISSES HER TO PUT A NEEDLE IN HER MOUTH? SO SHE CAN RELEASE HERSELF LATER??

To clarify, most of this is my spec, but THE KISS TO PASS HER A NEEDLE IS A REAL LEAKED SPOILER THAT NO LONGER SEEMS FAKE.

It's just…so convoluted and weird??? Does he store needles in his mouth like a squirrel? Why couldn’t he have slipped the needle into her hand??? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING ELROND’S LIPS ON GALADRIEL’S?

And look, maybe this spoiler IS still fake! But the details were so specific, and everything about the context seems to be accurate, so that feels like it would be a bonkers coincidence to me. Maybe when we actually see it play out, it will be fine.

But that does bring me back to the Haladriel of it all, just briefly. With my whole heart, I do not need them to kiss. After season 1, I didn’t think it would be possible, and I’m okay with that. But if you’re willing to let ELROND’S lips touch her, then MY GOD, you could have let Haladriel have ONE kiss where she’s trying to distract him or some shit. OOF.

My only relief is that it happens next week, so we can hopefully get it out of our systems and enjoy the finale.

That said, if these leaks are true then that also means the finale leaks are true. Now, I actually never wanted to see any of these spoilers (hence me making it VERY CLEAR what this post is about, because I wouldn’t inflict this stress on anyone unwillingly), so once I got the Elrond kiss details, I tried to get away without seeing much else. But there was some information on the big Haladriel scene.

I’m actually not going to detail it here, because – overall – I think we’ll still super enjoy it (just…lower those kiss expectations) AND because I don’t think all of it was spoiled. At the end of the day, there will be plenty to unpack, they’ll be back on our screens, it will be meaty, it will be layered. I’m really looking forward to it, in general.

My one fear is that it’s a season 1 finale repeat. And again, that won’t necessarily be bad per se, but it will feel a little bit underwhelming. Now, I’m not somebody that wants a true corruption arc for Galadriel. Normally, I love that shit, but not in this IP and not with this character. I want to see her explore her darkness, I want to see her face it and accept it, and I certainly want to see her be tempted…but I don’t expect or believe we'll ever actually get the whole ‘dark queen of Mordor’ vibe. Prisoner? Maybe. But not an actual dark queen.

That said…surely this scene doesn’t play out the EXACT same way as season 1? Sauron shows her a vision, she’s tempted, but ultimately resists and tells him she’ll never be at his side. I just don’t get why we’d repeat that, when there are so many other options that still keep Gal on the side of light.

I keep coming back to Galadriel’s line to Elrond in episode 4 – when it comes down to it, he has to choose to defeat Sauron and sacrifice her. I feel like if I hadn’t seen the leaks, then I would be 1000% expecting this to be the outcome. Especially with how Elrond’s theme comes in at the end of The Last Temptation track. He comes upon the confrontation but chooses to do the thing that will harm Sauron in the long run, rather than the thing that will save Galadriel.

I hope so badly for this, but I do worry that it will go the other way. What if it parallels Gandalfanger’s destiny/friend choice, and Elrond chooses her because THAT is how light wins or some shit? Not that this will be a bad scene by any stretch – I love their relationship and want to see their FRIENDSHIP (grrrr) reforged…but, again, the S1 finale! Sauron left her in the water, and Elrond was there to save her.

There’s also Galadriel’s conversation with Adar in the most recent episode – you succumbed, I resisted – but I guess this could go either way? He succumbed, so she resists. She insists she’s able to resist, so she succumbs. URGH. MY HEAD.

There MUST be a difference. SURELY??? Like, this season has been so well written…I just can’t comprehend the copy and paste.

Again, this isn’t anything close to a deal breaker for me. I firmly believe the showrunners when they say this relationship will remain the core of the show, but…hmmm. Okay, on that note…

DAMAGE CONTROL – MOVING ONTO THE DEFENCE OF THE SHOW

So, this is where I want to get into some stuff that I just…don’t agree with that I’ve seen being thrown at the show by shippers. And I’ll reiterate here that I’m truly not telling anybody what to feel. You can hate the show for its choices and feel how you feel. You can express yourself in your social media spaces, and if anybody doesn’t like it they can mute/block/unfollow. This chunk isn’t really aimed at you guys.

This is more for other people like me, because I’m cursed to be somebody that generally wants to just…enjoy things for what they are, while also being susceptible to the mood of others. I want to scroll tags and have a good time, rather than see negativity because it lowers my mood (this isn’t just ship related by the way, I really love this show overall…it’s just this tag that has been impacting my mood most this season). Regardless of the nonsense that might be in episode 7, and even if the finale scene is a repeat of S1, I’m still going to want to focus on enjoying what we get, enjoying the narrative being told etc. So, for those of you that have a little sinking feeling in your gut after the first half of this post, hopefully this second half will help.

This isn’t a ‘typical’ ship. This is a true ENEMIES ARE ENEMIES dynamic where the bad boy is ultimately going to be (is already) pure evil, and where our heroine is the embodiment of light. There are certain things that we just have to accept when it comes to loving this dynamic as part of the show – there will never be another season like season 1. Nor should there be?

Do I wish for s3 to have them in close proximity for at least a few episodes? Of course! Do I think it’s possible with or without finale spoilers? Absolutely (given how quickly characters travel from place to place on this show, they could end the season at opposite ends of Middle Earth and this would still be on the cards…). I’m also anticipating Season 4 as a good time for them to be in full MIND PALACE mode – where the rings are all ringing, but Galadriel hasn’t yet worked out how to shut him out yet. By season 5, there might just be one final scene before the final battle. But, again, I really do think there needs to be a little bit of acceptance of that. Or, at least, expectation of it.

Something I really want to push back against is this idea that Haladriel was baited or teased, but the writers don’t actually care for it. Honestly, that’s nonsense to me on a couple of levels.

First of all, almost EVERY dynamic this season has been reduced to a handful of scenes here and there. The most consistent relationships have probably been Annatar and Celebrimbor, and Durin+Durin+Disa (off the top of my head). Elrond and Durin (probably the other most popular dynamic of S1) have been apart all season, Elrond and Galadriel have too. Isildur popped up to say hello and we might not see him again.

When you actually stop and look at this season…Sauron and Galadriel had to be separated. She could not be anywhere near him while he’s working Celebrimbor, and there’s no world in which they were ever going to change that narrative. And yet, the Sauron and Galadriel dynamic has been consistent across the season. With Galadriel predominantly (and depending on how the finale goes, I may have thoughts on this), but it has also been easier with her because people have talked with her openly about Sauron. It’s been harder on his side, but the fact that Mirdania seems to have been cast to look like Galadriel honestly – right now – feels like it was done with the express purpose of giving Sauron a Galadriel reference.

Again, I’m not saying you have to like the lack of scenes, but it’s not bad writing to respect the overarching narrative of an ensemble show. Galadriel’s season has been all about him, and we’ve had countless insights to make that clear – building up to their final confrontation. If Sauron was running around mentioning Galadriel every five seconds with Celebrimbor or with the dwarves, it would be horrendously out of character.

This next comment is…somewhat dependent on the finale…but as somebody that loves Elendil and Miriel, everything in Numenor has been somewhat crammed in. I would firmly argue that the Galadriel/Sauron dynamic across this season has been treated with care and reverence, all building to a climax designed as the high point of the season. Will we be 100% satisfied? Who can say! But it IS what the season is building to.

I think this brings me around to a particular gripe I have, and maybe the people that believe this came to the show after S1 had fully aired or something…but there’s this idea floating around that the showrunners don’t like this dynamic and are just giving it crumbs to bait people into watching. This makes me want to scream.

These showrunners literally took a few lines about Galadriel being tempted by Sauron and PITCHED THE ENTIRE SHOW OFF OF THAT. The Tolkien estate wasn’t only pitched by Amazon BUT CHOSE THIS PITCH OVER ANYTHING ELSE. Season 1 was written pretty much like a prologue centred around GALADRIEL AND SAURON HAVING A PERSONAL CONNECTION WITH ROMANTIC UNDERTONES…and guess what?

They wrote all that…they filmed ALL THAT…before knowing anything about the audience reaction! That was ALL the showrunners, the writers, the directors, the actors. They ARE the narrative. They are not bait.

Does that mean the fundamentals of their dynamic will always please you, individually? No, of course not. Some people want outright romance, some people want soft Sauron, some people want Dark Galadriel. Will they kiss? I doubt it. Do I wish they would? Sure! Will they be separated again next season? Probably! Will I also wish that they could at least be stuck together for a run of episodes again? Absolutely!

But the idea that any of this is bait, or unimportant to the show drives me a little bit bonkers.

I guess my personal feeling of frustration comes from the fact that I feel so lucky they are exploring this show from the perspective of this dynamic, regardless of specific details/scenes. I’d bet my house (I don’t own a house) that every other pitch hinged on Elendil or Isildur as the protagonists of the show. Now, I love those dudes, but just IMAGINE? The fact that we’re on this path at all is still WILD to me.

ANYWAY, this is what happens when Paulina goes on holiday and I have nobody to ramble too. Sorry for the explosion, but I’ve been dreading the stupid kiss spoiler since I stumbled on it after EPISODE BLOODY 3 and so I needed to vent somewhere.

TL;DR: You are welcome to feel the way you feel, and if you hate everything you go right ahead, but maybe this makes sense to somebody. IDK. IDK.

[mitsvriii]

Attraction, pt 2

Pairings: Tomioka Giyu x reader, Obanai Iguro x Mitsuri Kanroji

TW's: none

Word Count: 730+

A/N: all images are from the KnY manga, thank you for the support on part 1. Giyu and Muichiro treat each other like siblings.. Again, sorry if anything is inaccurate. Sorry if it's shorter than you expected, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless!

Tags: @vkqxc20, @minnipe, @imyourbrokenfridge, @sugaremedy

It wasn't long before you and Giyu had made it to the ramen shop, still hand-in-hand. Despite how off-putting he might seem, he was actually enjoyable to be around. You two had chatted about random things, like favorite colors, weather, different breathing styles. And he surprisingly answered all of them, even your stupid questions like, was he a dog or cat person, would he cry at weddings, and do you snuggle your pillow when you go to sleep.

He seemed to be enjoying your company, and he even smiled at you. To which you responded with smile yourself. You were glad he was so comfortable around you, he wasn't like that with anyone besides Muichiro.

"We're here", Giyu interrupted the silence. "What do you want? I can order for you."

You looked up at him, "Just chicken ramen."

Giyu nodded at your words, "Then I'll get some, too." He gave you a short smile before opening the door to the shop for you.

You sat down at a small table, waiting for Giyu to come back once he ordered. You let out a small yawn as you looked around, the shop wasn't that full. But you supposed it was because it was about to be three, everyone was finishing up work.

It was a little later when Giyu returned, sitting down beside you. "It should be ready in less than ten minutes."

Okay so ten minutes more with Giyu, that wouldn't be awkward at all. You two had talked about everything, well, you had talked about everything. Giyu was more of a listener than a talker, although that was mostly obvious. Maybe you should ask him if he wanted to ask you anything?

"Do you want to ask me anything Giyu? I've been the one bombarding you with questions after all", you turned your head to look at him, awaiting his answer.

"Oh um, not really", Giyu fiddled with his hands, "I don't have any right now."

You nodded and rested your chin on the palm of your hand. A minute had to have passed by, right? It's not like you didn't enjoy Giyu's company, you just didn't know what to talk about with him. The Water Hashira went on most missions alone for god's sake.

But at the same time it was calming to stay in silence. You yourself only chatted if it was with someone new. You remember going out to eat with Kyojuro once after a mission, and having to listen to him say "Omai!" at the top of his lungs every time he took a bite of food.

You and Giyu sat in silence for at least another minute or so, sneaking glances at one another. It wasn't long after that when a waiter had came with your ramen bowls and chopsticks, leaving with a bow.

Giyu looked at you, as if expecting you to start eating first. You glanced at him before taking your chopsticks in hand, picking up a bite. You blew on it, taking a bite. That seemed to be the sign Giyu was looking for, as he did the same. So he was waiting for you to eat first, what a gentleman.

You two ate together, cracking little jokes here and there. You were glad that Obanai had eyes on Mitsuri, because Giyu was much more enjoyable to be around, to be with.

You two had finished eating after a few minutes, you were now heading back to headquarters after you had paid the bill, well. Giyu had paid the bill for you, much to your protests. He insisted that it was his pleasure, so naturally you relented and let him pay it.

You didn't seem to notice the way Sanemi's mouth dropped when you and Giyu walked back to headquarters hand in hand. Or the way Gyomei gave a knowing smile, and Muichiro looked on, confused on who you were. Shinobu smiled in victory as Uzui groaned and handed her 300 yen, and Kyojuro seemed to beam at the sight of you two. Not that you both noticed anything. You honestly didn't even bother to notice that Mitsuri and Obanai were out again, your mind now focused on the raven haired man holding your hand.

The one thing Obanai had done right to you was not recuperating your feelings, because if he did you wouldn't be as happy as you were right now with Giyu.

[cybertron-smash-or-pass]

A bit of a loaded question, I know, but do you have any TF ships you prefer and would like to share?

I need you to be aware that you're opening pandora's box here. The vibes range anywhere from "god this is hot" to "god this is cute" to "their dynamic is so fucking interesting and i want to study them under laboratory conditions" to "this hurts so much and I need the drama, I am CRYING" to smashing barbie dolls together. I have crackships you ain't even THOUGHT about. I throw ships at the wall just to see if they stick. I like a lot of ships. Arguably too damn many. So many that I'm putting this under a cut to spare people from the long post. So many that I have to sort them by continuity so you're not staring at an unorganized list longer than do you love the color of the sky.

TFA

shockbee I feel has a lot of the potential for shockwave fearing what happens when bee finds out he's not longarm. Like a lot of the scenes in auto boot camp read to me like shockwave really did want bee as an ally while he climbs the ranks, and there's some juicy potential for shocker starting out as just using him until he actually catches feelings. Especially in aus where bee really did join the elite guard. Like can you imagine the drama. The heartbreak. The trust issues. Bee realizing he never really knew the guy he could trust most. Wondering if he's even safe to be around. If anything was even real. Shockwave wondering the same things. Hhhhhhhhh.

I do enjoy shockblurr conceptually but I'm not crazy about how they're usually portrayed in the fandom bc I feel like we're all forgetting that shockwave is a ball of anxiety and murder, and Blurr is a straight laced fuckin nerd who can't shut his mouth. An overpowered, highly capable nerd, but a nerd still. I like what the artist katzske does with them a lot tho.

I'm also a blitzbee enjoyer but on a less "bee can fix him and itll be so sweet" level and more "god imagine how annoying they'd be together." Looney Tunes levels of fucking with people. Either that or bumblebee is just horny on main and really likes the thought of bagging a con, but then he goes and catches feelings.

prowlbulk owns my entire heart. They're so sweet on each other and prowl really respects and appreciates bulkhead way more than bulky's used to. And bulkhead admires so much of prowl's skill and perspective. They work so well together as a couple and it's fucking adorable. With a hint of tragedy bc. Well. You know.

Bulkbee is also incredibly cute bc I'm a sucker for besties that very slowly realize they love each other so much it makes them look stupid. Good in romantic or qpr flavors. Bee already climbs all over bulkhead like a squirrel, they're so fuckin affectionate and very very stupid in social settings.

I like Optimus and blackarachnia from a drama standpoint bc God. They are tragic. They are MESSY. I genuinely think there's no happy ending for them. The trust is gone. But they still miss each other so much and they just CANT move on, so they keep stringing each other along. They're just hurting themselves and each other every time one does anything nice for the other. It's the kinda shit that just slowly rips your heart out. OP please don't text your ex. OP pLEASE

Megop is a classic but I feel we as a fandom underutilize how much Optimus pisses off Megatron. He is an asshole cat knocking shit off the counter for attention. Megs lets him be worse when he is so so fucking tired of being good. He loves that he hates him and he hates that he loves him. Full on "my esteemed rival" "dearly detested." Fighting each other is cathartic and addictive. Megatron finds it infuriating but he can't deny how much he likes having a worthy opponent, how fitting it is that the cosmos sent him so deadly a nemesis, and yet how lame it is that he was so forgettable at first so now he feels dumb being mildly obsessed with him. Optimus is just glad he has someone who doesn't expect him to be perfect and nice and upstanding. He can vent out a lot of his less noble feelings or impulses that he's had completely repressed for ages. The pressure's off in a lot of ways. And I think in an enemies to lovers sense, watching them figure out how to make that setup and that very odd mutual desire to be in each other's lives into something healthier could be really compelling. Or tragic in a "why did I let myself need you? Why the fuck did I let myself need you?" way.

Beeprowl is funny but I only really like it in a "you annoy me SO MUCH let's make out about it" way. Nothing committed, just dispelling the tension without having to kill each other. It is just kinda nice seeing them have genuinely sweet moments though. Squidbob ass relationship.

Lugnut and Strika are the perfect Decepticon power couple and I love them so much. So very much. Lugnut loves his big terrifying wife capable of leveling cities, and she loves her sweet devoted husband who could throw her across the room. I think they break chairs over each other's heads for fun and have been trying to seduce Megatron into a threesome for ages.

Shockwave and Megatron are also incredibly good. The loyalty. The "I commit my whole existence to you. I am yours, in mind body and soul. I will go wherever you need me to, I will put myself in immeasurable danger for you, just please say I'm doing a good job" and "all my efforts would be lost without you. In a world where I have been vulnerable and terrified, where I have been stabbed in the back by people I thought I could wholly trust, I can look at you and know, unwaveringly, you won't do the same. I trust you completely." It's Delicious. It's absolutely codependent but god it's tasty.

Also honestly? Bulkhead and the constructicons could make a pretty cute throuple. He wants them to be better. They want him to be worse. He just wants them to do honest work and they want him to stop letting stuffy, elitist autobot society control him so much. They love each other, they're friends (even if the constructicons don't totally remember the first night they met him). And they really do enjoy each other's company. They're just guys being dudes. Just dudes being guys. Just guys being gays. (It's also just nice when bulkhead gets to be the smaller one, scrapper totally carries him around like a big ol' cat).

I really like prowl being torn between lockdown and jazz. They're the devil and angel on his shoulders. Lockdown tempting him into relapsing, feeling himself fall into old habits, forsaking everything he's learned about patience and respect and being conscientious of the world around him. Jazz picking him back up when he slips, making him WANT to keep being better. And prowl can't decide if he wants to be loved in spite of all his toxic traits or BECAUSE of them. It's got me in a chokehold, your honor.

Megastar is fun in tfa because 1. It's implied Megatron never actually abused starscream while they were on the same side (the first thing starscream says after waking up from being shot is "YOU DARE STRIKE ME, MEGATRON?" which reads to me like this is a new development). Megs doesn't actually hurt anyone working for him other than Sumdac, who he fucking hates (at least not on-screen), and the only reason he was as aggro to starscream post-revival was because he knew screamer is the reason he spent all that fucking time as just a severed head. He used to actually trust him, sort of, even if he was a scheming, sycophantic little weasel. And 2. It's pretty obvious they have history together. I genuinely truly believe they were exes and Starscream only planted a bomb on him because he couldn't be fucking normal about the divorce. You look at how they bitch at each other in deep space and then immediately fall into what is most likely their old dynamic of getting things done and shooting the shit and tell me they never had an intense romantic stint that went horribly wrong. Starscream calls him Meggy in his internal logs for fucks sake.

Ratchet x Arcee are also very very cute together. Old married dorks. Ratchet's so soft with her and he wants her to be okay. She genuinely likes him and he makes the nightmare she's subjected herself to bearable. "Don't call me sir, I work for a living!" They're both horrifically traumatized, they understand each other on a level most bots can't, and they can ground each other when it gets bad. God. You know they're slow dancing in the kitchen together. You know they're sickeningly domestic with each other. They are holding hands in the park on a comically small bench on earth right as we SPEAK.

Oh also sumdac x megatron. It started as a crackship of mine but I really love the idea of sumdac feeling legitimately guilty for taking Megatron apart and unknowingly violating him the way he did, even if Megatron is terrible. Like the dynamic of "you lied to me" "if I told you who I really was, I would be dead. I don't owe you the truth when you held me captive. I was vulnerable. I was TERRIFIED. I did what I had to in order to keep myself safe. And you come to ME with accusations of doing you wrong? When YOU held all the power? And then when I'd taken back the power you left me without, made you feel what I felt, I'm a monster?" "I never meant to hurt you" "Well you did. And now you know just how much damage you did." Like it's such an interesting angle, ESPECIALLY when you consider that sumdac probably grew to legitimately care about Megatron while he was in his lab. He wanted to do right by him. He wanted to see him restored and thriving. He was his robot buddy that made a birthday gift for his kid once. Some part of him probably misses him after he's gone, some part of him probably feels guilty too, even through all the rage and hurt and fear and betrayal. That's complicated feelings!! That's juicy!!!!!

I like the thought of Shockwave and Optimus but that's mostly for sexy reasons. Something about a big, smooth talking, scary cryptid monster, very well spoken and elegant, seducing Good, Upstanding Autobot Optimus to The Dark Side. This is mostly because Optimus is a huge nerd and so is Shockwave. I think Shockwave could potentially pique his interest with uncensored versions of the history Optimus is already a huge dweeb about, and seal the deal with a few gentle touches and honeyed words. From Optimus's perspective this is Very Obviously a Honeypot Trap but the trouble is Shockwave is very hot and very sweet on him and starting to seem less and less evil so he's not sure how long he can keep his guard up when the temptation is this strong. He has a duty to fight Decepticons and shut out their lies but man. He's so tired. And Shockwave's berth is very warm. There is something satisfying about seeing him choose to be selfish after nearly a whole show of him taking the high road. (It's even better if he gets attached when eventually Shockwave's Cool Sexy Collected vibes falter and he sees how much of an anxious, panicky dork he actually is)

I also just kind of like the idea of team prime being a polycule (other than ratchet, who is just watching the young bots having relationship drama and rolling his optics (the age gap and mentor role make me personally a little uncomfortable but I have nothing against people who do include him, they're all adults, its chill)). I like the thought of these losers getting home after a long day and collapsing into a cuddle pile, either on the couch or on the floor. They all love each other so much already, I think they should kiss about it, but they're super repressed so it's So Very Shy and Cautious and Sweet.

The same goes for the Decepticons but more in a "cons are pretty casual about sex anyway, they're in close proximity, and they tolerate each other at least so nearly everyone has a fuck buds setup with each other" way. I feel like the autobots are super repressed in that regard so the cons started leaning into being sluts to stick it to the mech along with all the other freaks shit they're cool with. God help Blackarachnia, she goes from Autobot repression to all her coworkers being sluts on main and she Does Not Know what to do about that (also it would make a lot of sense if that's why she started leaning into the femme fatale thing so hard)

TFP

Megop is also Very Good here. Literally the most divorced robots to ever exist. Megatron NEEDS Optimus back and Optimus still holds a torch for megs, but it's so fucking funny because they're clearly on fundamentally different levels of "I miss you." Like Optimus is kinda sad and he does want the old Megatronus back, but Megatron does these whole fuckin elaborate stunts to get Optimus to pay attention to him again and then locks himself in his room with a pint of ice cream and dark energon to cry about him. Mans is NOT coping. Alternatively, Optimus is coping just as poorly on the inside and he really does still love Megatron just as much but he knows that's a selfish desire that he quiets with everything else he sacrifices about himself in the name of being a good leader. Least repressed Optimus.

Optiratch my beloved. Gay old men who would do anything for each other, even when they really don't agree on how to proceed. They're best friends, they're husbands, they're crushing on each other and they think it's unrequited, they just started dating, they've been married for eons. All of it works soooo well. They know each other well enough that they can communicate by just kinda grunting in specific ways. I need them to hold hands SO bad.

Bulkhead and wheeljack should get to kiss on the mouth I think. If Arcee can call Wheeljack Bulkhead's boyfriend, and bulkhead does not deny it, logic dictates they should in fact French kiss sloppy style for a whole minute on live TV. It can happen. Only on the hub.

KOBD are adorable together, they are so unhinged and stupid and they love each other so much. Like the team rocket of the nemesis. Breakdown loves his husband soooo much and knockout misses him so bad when Silas gets him. And you KNOW they're freaks bc knockout is totally convinced that breakdown would've loved seeing how he torments Silas in bd's body. He's probably right about it too.

I also wholly support Ms. June Darby for trying to seduce Optimus. Me too girl, get that robo ass. Go get jack a new cooler dad. It's also very cute to imagine Optimus, the bigass 30 foot robot, the stoic leader of the Autobots who keeps stonefaced through just about anything, flustered and crushing on a very small and very flirty human.

For some reason the show was kind of trying to tease Bulkhead x Arcee for exactly one episode and then never again and like. Look. I understand it was a forced het ship that was there to distract people from how gay they accidentally made the show. I know it'd probably just be Arcee rebounding after losing Cliffjumper. But I think them having a fwb type relationship while she works through her feelings could be interesting. Though this could just be because Bulkhead is big sweet and comforting and him holding anyone and making them feel safe while they're Going Through it is enough to get me saying God I Wish That Were Me.

Bumblebee and Smokescreen appeal to me in the same way seemingly very hetero frat bros who are apparently a very sweet and affectionate gay couple do. It's an inherently funny irony and also theyre just both cute himbos.

TFP Megastar is horrifically unhealthy in general and there is absolutely no way in hell it could work out. Not pre-war, not post-megs-redemption, nada. Which is why it has my brain in a chokehold. This is one of the ships I like because it's fascinating and because god it HURTS. Like I have my gripes with how the show portrayed the abuse overall but there were some things they were cooking with. Starscream being an obvious victim but then turning around and inflicting it on everyone around him? Girl no, the cycle of violence and abuse!!!! Girl no, you're refusing to do the complex emotional work of accepting that what happened to you wasnt okay and thus you carry out the behaviors you've gaslit yourself into thinking are normal!!!!!! Girl no, society has failed you and you have no support systems to help you break the cycles, but you also simply refuse to try in the first place because your pride wouldn't allow it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The cortical psychic patch was literally my fave showcase of their dynamic in the whole show. "I don't want to play this game anymore!" Like jfc ouch. Also the thought of post redemption Megatron lamenting how he treated Starscream, not having considered the damage he's done to him before now. Trying to make it right and only making it all worse by inserting himself into Starscream's life again and realizing how badly he's broken him, how fucked it is that Starscream seems to revere him after EVERYTHING. God. GOD. I'm in agony.

Rescue Bots

Speaking of starscream in the cycle of abuse, KOSS has postcanon potential. (Post Predacons Rising, rid does not exist 😌) Like. They've proven they feel some type of way about each other. "I've always admired your lustrous finish." "😏" But Knockout was the first person in starscream's life to set a boundary in a healthy way. And when starscream inevitably ignores those boundaries and knockout leaves, you know how much it fucking hurts starscream to realize how badly he fucked up. But of course, the pride. He can't apologize. Can't admit he's the reason knockout betrayed him. So he'll choke back the tears. He'll try to, anyway. But he can't stop the agony in his voice while he feebly spits out "Fine! I hope Unicron eats you too!!" You know the second they shut the door on him, the waterworks started, and so did the closest thing to self reflection Starscream's ever done. He Has the Potential to be Better with Knockout, but he NEEDS to put in the work, and the suspense of wondering if he WILL fucks my whole shit up.

It is so close to canon that blades and bumblebee are boyfriends. Hell I believe it pretty much IS canon. He loves that bug so much. He gets jealous when he hangs out with Dani and not him. He hugs him for a photo the first chance he gets. And since we know blades is confirmed as being into dudes, I think we all know what they were getting at. TFP bumblebee has an anxious twink boyfriend that lives in Maine and we have no idea whatsoever if the rest of team prime knows.

Graham and boulder pine for each other like you would not believe. Once again, pretty much canon. You can't just have boulder keep telling Graham "well I like you just how you are" when Graham's trying to impress a girl and expect me to not think he has a big stupid gay crush on his best friend. They love each other so much as partners and as friends, I know damn well they'd be SICKENINGLY cute together as boyfriends. They'd probably try to stealth it at first bc a human and a giant robot alien in love? What'll the others think?? Gotta keep it secret. Sneaking off into the woods so Boulder can work on his "art projects" but in fact they are kissing. They're not as slick as they think they are, Chief Burns 100% picks up what's going on but he lets them think they're sneaky. Nobody actually has any problems with it other than Kade making fun of them a little but don't worry that's just him projecting.

On the opposite side of the spectrum, Heatwave and Kade are the worst fucking tsunderes about crushing on each other. Between heatwave refusing to let down the brooding tough guy persona and kade being so insistent on staying hyper masculine (to the point where mild internalized homophobia is inevitable), neither of them can just be honest about how much they mean to each other and they gotta resort to getting each other's attention by being mean in very low stakes ways. I am drowning, there is no sign of land, you are coming down with me, hand in unloveable hand, except they're not drowning and they're just dunking each other in a kiddie pool repeatedly.

Heatwave and quickshadow are fun for similar reasons but with less shit lord pranks and/or lowbrow bitching, and more classy verbal sniping and sparring with each other because heatwave thinks it's hot when quickshadow kicks his ass. They're insufferably competitive and I think that could be very fun and incredibly messy, especially since they both need to learn how to communicate. Very bisexual, they are forced to share the brain cell, 10/10

I also just enjoy the idea of all the bots being in a polycule the same way I like the idea for TFA's team prime. They're very sweet together and they clearly care about each other a lot. Its just kind of nice when they all hold hands together, you feel me? They're sneaking off to kiss in the bunker bc they don't know if the humans know dudes can like other dudes. They are also not as subtle as they think they are.

Oh also doc Greene and chief burns dated once when they were teenagers and it didn't work out but they stayed besties, nobody can change my mind on this.

Beast Wars

Dinobot and Megatron are exes, 100%. Dinobot is probably the only being in the known universe that Megatron actually kind of cares about other than himself and his rubber duck. Otherwise he wouldn't keep trying to fucking clone him to make a version that will never leave him. There's also some implications here and there that Megatron really did want the world to be better for Predacons (along with the desire for power, anyway) and that preds are genuinely treated unfairly, so there's a pretty compelling angle of dinobot having been drawn to megatron because he saw someone with noble goals and a way to fix their fucked up world before becoming disillusioned with the dishonorable tyrant he turned out to be.

Dinobot and Optimus are also very good together bc it really truly feels like Dinobot finally found the guy with honor he thought he saw in Megatron. And he's infuriating half the time because he isn't nearly as bloodthirsty as he's used to, but GODDAMN does he make him Feel Things. The entire episode Gorilla Warfare has me obsessed with them. The bitching. Dinobot freaking the fuck out and Optimus tenderly removing the seed pod stuck to the back of his neck that was freaking him out and only laughing at him a little. Dinobot constantly trying to choose violence. The stupid smile when Optimus also chooses violence and Dinobot realizes he fucked up. THE BEDSIDE VIGIL. "It was my shift" AND YOU KNOW THEY WEREN'T TAKING SHIFTS. THE FLOWER ON THE BEDSIDE TABLE. "it is good to have you back." "Back home or back to normal?" "...both." THEY'RE HOMOSEXUAL, YOUR HONOR.

Dinobot (shit maybe I just really like dinobot) with Rattrap is good for similar reasons but the vibes are totally different. DoOp is all soft and sweet and patient and light ribbing, Dinotrap is talking shit at each other as a love language. Dinobot is a good guy but he's also, fundamentally, a bitch. Rattrap has proven he can match his freak by bitching right back. They love each other by pretending to hate each other. To the point where if Rattrap doesn't hear any comebacks he genuinely starts worrying because "oh, we aren't playing the game, why aren't you playing, are you okay?" They have so many soft tender moments where they prove they actually love each other. Their last conversation is talking shit!!!! "You're just a slag spouting saurian, but it's nice to know where you stand." "Upwind of you for preference, rodent." They loved each other!!!!!! Rattrap is fucked up over losing him!!!!!!!!!!! It's bittersweet, it's tragic, it hurts so bad and I love them so much!!!! They're stupid your honor!!!!!!!!!!!!

On a much sillier side, I do love Rattrap x Rhinox. Rattrap kissed that man twice. On the mouth. On screen. Annoying little gremlin who goes "nyehhhh" x big stoic dude who goes "hn." And they're both tech guys so they probably work on projects together a lot. And they all survive and are fine bc beast machines isnt real 💖

I have my problems with Silverbolt in general but I cannot deny that he and Blackarachnia are pretty damn cute together. He loves his girlfriend, they trash her shitty ex together, she loves that he doesn't try to change her. She gets to be the bad girl and the sweet knight in shining armor still loves her. "Dark poison of my heart" like c'mon.

Airazor and Tigatron are also pretty cute AND they have the honor of being the first canon gay couple in the tf franchise bc of the Japanese dub, which made Airazor a dude but left the romance unchanged (the Japanese dub was also just generally fuckin insane tho so it's not all that shocking).

Waspinator and Terrorsaur are boyfriends for real and for canon, John hasbro told me himself.

RiD 2001

I ship skybyte with that one girl that lives in a state of constant talking-car-based torment. Why? Because when I watched rid with my roommate we had a running joke that eventually they'd meet and have a whole robotfucker romcom arc and it kinda just stuck. This is my only rid ship and I will not be taking criticism on it.

Cyberverse

Bumblebee, Hot Rod and Cheetor are in a polycule together and nobody can tell me they aren't. Just how it's gotta be.

I want Perceptor and Dead End to kiss so badly. They're technically canon already given how hard the creators ship them. They hold hands your honor. "only a bolthead would go out there... UGH I'm such a BOLTHEAD" HES IN LOVE YOUR HONOR.

Hot Rod and Soundwave are great as enemies to lovers, they're so annoying 💖. I feel like they'd start playing gay chicken and be married with three kids wondering when the other guy is gonna back out.

SHOCKWAVE AND WHEELJACK OH MY GOD. fellas is it gay to program your drones which are just tiny versions of your own altmode to dance funny to Tetris music specifically because it makes your lame ass boyfriend laugh and then keep that function eons after you break up and still remember exactly what the command is? Fellas is it gay to get kidnapped by your ex and then get really excited about all the cool shit he's been making while you were separated? I wish they could've gotten a happy ending man, they could've been so cute together.

I don't ship it romantically but I believe in Grimlock & Arcee qpr. They love each other so so much they would've readily died for each other. I love their dynamic, they're insane 💖

Same goes for Shadowstriker and Soundwave tbh. Decepticon besties, and Shadowstriker being aro kinda just feels right. I like to think they cuddle and talk shit about Shockwave while Sounders blasts heavy metal. They play cod as the most insufferable duo.

Megop in cyberverse is so good because it really feels like they Had a relationship but it was unstable and moved too fast and they just assumed they were on the same page about things without communicating properly until suddenly they were in serious disagreement, and TRIED to work it out in a mature way but they were simply Doomed From the Start. And then it culminates in a whole fucking war but it rages so long, and they are so tired of fighting, and they realize they want to try again because nobody was really to blame for how things ended because they both handled it poorly. I wish they got that chance to try again properly. I wish when Optimus retired to just fuck around and vibe, he could've taken Megatron with him. I wish they could've fallen in love all over again.

Oh also Slipstream and Windblade being lesbian enemies to lovers bait was Fucking Phenomenal and I Love it So Much. They're smug and terrible and I want them to make out. They can make each other worse 💖

G1

I have not seen that much of g1 but I do know a few things are absolute truth.

Soundwave is gay for Megatron. This is arguably reciprocated.

Shockwave is gay for Megatron. This is not reciprocated but it is taken advantage of.

Starscream vacillates between gay for Megatron and trying to kill him. Megatron seems to reciprocate but only a little bit. Enough to keep him alive because he's cute. But megs also gets a lot of cuteness aggression so he feels the need to chuck starscream against the wall every now and then.

Powerglide and Astoria are tied for the pinnacle of robot on human romance in the entire tf franchise with Tracks and Raul, and if none of them come back in ANY tf media, I will riot.

Cliffjumper and Mirage have fucked at least once.

Wheeljack and Ratchet are gay married.

Optimus is bisexual and he loves elita-1 but there is something distinctly homoerotic going on with Megatron.

Conclusion

I like when the robots kiss <3

[god-has-entered-my-body]

Summer 75 // Heat wave - Matty Healy

A/N: litch just me trying to get out of my writers block

-day twelve-

content warnings: smut, he's litch just a whore whining for (and riding.) the strap xx, MDNI I swear to fuck

Your fingers stick to the pages of your book from the sweat, making it near impossible to turn them properly. The sheets feel too hot, so you pick them off you, leaving you splayed across the mattress, wishing for a cool autumn instead of the hellish heat you’re currently experiencing. It feels like there's a bonfire burning right in front of you, the small fan in your hand barely cooling you off. The lacey white curtains are closed to keep some of the sun out, darkening the room slightly. 

You can hear footsteps walking up the carpeted stairs onto the second floor, getting louder and louder as they approach your cracked door, a messy, damp head of curls peeking out from behind it. Matty knocks lightly, smiling as you beckon him in, glancing over your book. “It’s fucking blazing, innit? Can’t be arsed doing anything in this heat.” he speaks, wiping sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand, loudly exhaling as he enters the room, stopping right at the foot of the bed. 

Matty’s bare chest shines with sweat, and you can tell he’s breathing heavier than usual. Shorts hang low on his hips and he’s rid of all jewelry, presumably because of the unbearable heat. “Can’t take this anymore, ugh. Clothes feel like a fucking prison” he complains again, pacing the length of the room and running a hand through his hair, inhaling deeply before settling his eyes back on you, dressed in a white shirt and underwear, your clothing just as sparse as his. He tugs at the bottom of his shorts, trying to let air flow under the fabric. 

“Can take the rest off, I don't mind.” you grin, putting your book down next to you. Matty raises an eyebrow at you, the corners of his mouth turning up into a sly smirk. You eye him up and down, making no effort at all to hide your staring, much to his enjoyment. “Hm? Yeah, sure, alright then.” Matty’s words are smooth, almost nonchalant as he lets his hand move from the hem of his bottoms to the button, slowly undoing it, never breaking eye contact. 

The waistband of his calvins peeks out from beneath his shorts as he lets them fall around his ankles, watching how your eyes widen and lips part, admiring him from your spot on the bed. “Don’t stare, it's rude.”

You roll your eyes at his words, shooting him a dangerous look as he bites his lip lightly, cracking the bones of his knuckles as the tension between the two of you grows.  

“Stop teasing and I won't stare.” you shoot back, swiping your tongue along your bottom lip and Matty kneels onto the bed, the mattress dipping beneath you. You lay back, putting your hands behind your head and looking at him through hooded eyes, earning a confused look from Matty. “Obviously you want something, baby.” you state, your eyes raking over his body and landing on the growing bulge in his boxers. “Need you to tell me what that is.” 

Matty exhales sharply, pupils blown out as he stares at your chest, nipples hard and visible through the thin material of your shirt. You smirk, motioning for him to answer your question. Matty stutters over his words, his eyes averting yours and wandering in the direction of your bottom nightstand drawer, his face flushing a deep red. 

“J-just-” he starts, words getting caught in his throat as you stretch your arms above your head, letting your shirt ride up your stomach. Letting your hands fall onto your chest, you look back down, an expectant expression on your face. “Hm?” you hum, signaling your growing impatience as Matty slowly crawls further up the bed, resting his hands on your bare thighs, rubbing his fingers over the skin. 

“Want you to fuck me, please.” his voice cracks pathetically as you suck in a deep breath, exhaling out your nose and nodding at Matty. “Yeah? Do it then, baby, I'm not stopping you.” 

His eyes widen slowly as you brush your hair out of your face, the pieces framing it slightly curled from the heat. You can see how turned on he is, apparent from the way his hand trembles as he reaches for the drawer, opening it and pulling out the strap you both know and love. You can feel him rock hard against your thigh, leaking into his boxers as he runs his fingers over the toy, memories flashing through his mind. 

He hands it to you, expecting you to get up, flip him over, fuck him fast and hard, just how he likes it. Instead, you shake your head, wetting your lips once again before speaking. 

“You don't need my help, baby, go on.” Matty looks confused again, needing a few seconds before fully grasping what you meant. God, the look on his face is priceless when he finally does.   

He scoots back down the bed with heavy breaths and shaky movements, lifting one, both of your legs to slide it onto your body. Matty taps your hips to signal you to lift them, tightening the clasps as you watch him struggle to keep his composure, groaning every time his cock brushes against the mattress, or your leg. His hand fists the toy, looking up to make eye contact with you, blushing and panting, the sight of him slowly jerking off a fake cock for your enjoyment affecting you more than you thought it would. 

“Put that pretty mouth to use, yeah baby?” you say, words dripping with lust as Matty whines, nodding eagerly. You watch closely as his tongue darts out to lick the tip, toying with it as if it were real, putting on a show for you. A moan spills from your lips at how fucking hot he looks, giving him the reaction he needs to take the toy down his throat, coating it in spit. Matty’s eyes water as he takes it deeper, choking and sputtering with effort. 

“God, you look like such a slut for me, so fucking pretty.” you praise, brushing a strand of hair out of his face lovingly as he continues moving up and down the strap, getting it nice and wet for you. 

You let him stay like this, sucking off a piece of plastic until the back of his throat is bruised and tears are rolling down his face. Grabbing him by the hair, you pull him off it, your thumb wiping at his cheek sweetly. “You’re so beautiful, baby, love you like this.” Matty whimpers as you motion for him to straddle you, his thighs bracketing your hips as his cock strains against his boxers, the front of them stained with precum. “Take those off for me, pretty, show me how much you want to fuck yourself on my cock, yeah?” you snap the waistband against his skin, your words smooth and unwavering as Matty stutters out a quiet, “Oh, fuck-”, ridding himself of his underwear in the blink of an eye. 

His hands rest on your chest, holding himself up as his cock rubs against your strap. Slowly, he raises his hips, groaning and whining with effort as he sinks down, feeling the burning stretch of the toy inside of him. You can't hold back the noises that leave your lips at his reactions, watching intently as he experimentally rolls his hips, crying out at the sensation. Matty’s moans are pornographic as he starts bouncing up and down, his cock leaking precum. You leave your hands behind your head, enjoying the view of Matty fucking himself immensely, whispering words of encouragement as his whines grow louder. 

“So fucking gorgeous for me, baby, being so good f’me.” You can see his eyes flutter shut as he angles his hips to hit his g-spot over and over, bringing himself to the edge embarrassingly quickly.

“F-fuck, darling, please.” he begs, more tears welling up in his eyes as you smirk at him teasingly.

“Need to cum, baby? Make a mess of yourself like a fucking whore?” you coo, cruelly laughing at Matty’s desperate nods. 

“Fuck, need it so bad, pleasepleaseplease– I c-can’t–” he whimpers, the blissed out expression on his face absolutely delicious. You nod slowly, groaning as Matty bites his lip, hard, his hands leaving your chest to feel himself up, running his fingers up and down his torso as his hips roll desperately, chasing his release. 

It doesn't take long for him to cum, spilling all over your shirt and chest, whining and moaning as he fucks himself through his high, eyes screwed tight in pleasure. His little gasps are like music to your ears, his face and chest flushed red as he comes down, the waves of pleasure slowly subsiding. “Fuck-” is the only word that leaves his lips as he falls limply onto you, smearing his chest with his own cum. 

“Did so good, baby.” you whisper into his ear, running a soothing hand through his curls. “I’m proud of you Matty, y’were so fucking pretty for me.” 

You can feel Matty nod into your chest, his arms coming up to wrap around you and pull you impossibly closer, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. 

“I love you,” he mumbles, voice weak and fucked out, words slightly muffled. You smile at the ceiling, your fingers rubbing small circles into his back as you just lay there, basking in each other's comforting presence.  

[notafunkiller]

golden getaway

Summary: Director Bucky and actress reader take some time off and go on vacation, but instead of focusing on the sights, they choose to enjoy each other.

Pairing: director!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader

Warnings: 18+, age gap (r is 24, Bucky is 36), established relationship, teasing (verbal - especially about age: calling him old man and daddy), dirty talk, pet names, fingering, nipples play, clit play, quick sex, no condom (but they are both clean and the reader is on birth control), no mention of y/n

Word Count: 2.4K

story masterlist

Bucky Barnes masterlist

A/N: This vacation happens in July, so a few months have passed since the first chapter (the premiere was in February).

An extra thank you to @marvelouslizzie and @lavenderhaze967​ for the endless support.

Please, do not repost or translate without my permission!

This vacation is a first in many ways for you. You've never been to Italy with your boyfriend before (or anywhere outside the country without your family), especially not on a yacht. And you certainly have never enjoyed the sun and sea like this. You're more of a mountain person, truth be told, but the breeze is so nice, and Bucky always makes sure you're fine: helping you with the sunscreen and getting you back on the deck safely since you're not the best swimmer. And the sight? Absolutely breathtaking, just like the man that almost never leaves your side.

You didn't expect him to be so spontaneous when you first got together, knowing how organized and focused he is when it comes to his job. You saw this when you worked together, but he surprised you with this trip and many other things during the last few months.

“I can’t believe you,” you say when you feel the pat on your ass, despite not being taken aback by his gesture. He never keeps his hands to himself when you’re around. He loves to hold your hand or touch your waist, ass, boobs, or face. Whatever and whenever he can. And even though you’d have thought it would suffocate you before you two got together, it’s actually very enjoyable. Because you also have space, so you’re not suffocating each other at all.

“I missed you.” You feel the words on your skin as Bucky starts kissing you below your ear, making you shiver. 

“I was gone for two minutes, you’re a baby.” To make a short call.

His hands find your waist immediately, and his metal arm feels so good on your skin. You can’t help but close your eyes. It’s cold and comforting at the same time. You’ve never been the type of person who enjoys being out in the sun or tanning, but it’s not bad with him. Bucky makes many things and experiences overall better for you.

“I’m your baby.”

When you feel him prepping small kisses on your shoulder now, you try not to moan. Instead, you let out a fake gagging sound, before complaining. “Ugh, since when are you so clingy? Is it because of your age?”

“Age?” He repeats the word unsure with that low and raspy voice that you love.

But before you can tease him further, you feel his fingers stroking your tummy, and you start screaming with laughter. “Stop, stop. It’s too much.”

You’re almost in tears when he finally puts an end to the tickling torture, turning you around with his hands.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty when you laugh.” You smile when you feel his lips touch your forehead. “My pretty baby.” Then your nose. “My pretty doll.” And finally, the corner of your mouth, giving you the perfect opportunity to kiss him.

He opens his mouth instantly when he feels your hands wrapping around his neck, and your tongues touch. He still tastes like the chocolate ice cream you had a bit ago, and you enjoy it so much.

Breathless, you pull away but don't move, analyzing his face. He is freshly shaved, so you can't see the whites in his beard anymore. Which means you can't use them to tease him. But you can find something else, you smile as you bring your fingers to his chin, stroking.

“Did you think shaving makes you look younger, Mr. Barnes?” You bite your lip not to snort at his expression. You know how affected he is every time you call him that.

The funny thing is that it actually makes him look younger, but he doesn't need that. You love his beard, his wrinkles, and his style. “I should let you know that it doesn't change the fact you're still an old man, who is dating a girl more than a decade younger. Scandalous!”

“Old man…” He whispers to himself before squeezing your ass cheeks twice. “I guess my girl likes that.”

It’s hard to keep still when he touches you like this, but you do your best, moving your hand from his chin to his chest, then to his metal arm. “Hmmm, maybe you should remind your girl all the perks dating an older man has.”

Bucky raises his eyebrows, surprised by your change of tone and the obvious meaning of the words. He knows how dirty your mouth can get in bed, but he didn’t expect this, especially now. Good thing his hard-on shows you how he really feels about it when you let your eyes lower on his -now tight- shorts.

“How?”

You don’t answer, instead, you turn around after giving him a sly smile and slowly make your way inside. You know he’s gonna follow you, so you don’t even look back. And in less than thirty seconds -you counted- he’s in front of you, stroking his chin lazily.

“What?”

“I asked a question you deliberately chose not to answer so I could come here, so you tell me.”

You nod your head and without thinking twice, you bring his metal hand right over your covered pussy. “Is what I want clear enough for you now, old man?” And cherry on top, you bring both of your hands to your breasts to show off your hard nipples through your fingers.

He simply moans, incapable of saying anything in return for a while as he keeps staring. And staring. And staring. He wants to lick and bite your boobs so much, but it’s clear you want something else. 

“Are you trying to kill me?” He asks softly as he slips his hand under your bikini. You gasp at the feeling and have to grab him to support yourself when he parts your lips and slides his index finger inside you. Finally!

“Bucky,” you whisper against his shoulder as he starts moving slowly.

“So wet for me. What a little horny girl I have.”

You close your eyes, pressing yourself even more against him. “Faster, baby.”

He nods against your hair and does what you say, but also adds another finger, scissoring them inside you before you can even realize what’s going on. And it’s like you’re on fire all of a sudden. Because it feels so fucking good! Just like your breasts feel against his chest… absolutely heavenly.

“My wet little doll.”

“Mm…” You can barely hear him through the ringing in your ears. His fingers feel amazing even with this pace, but you really need that orgasm faster, so you cry into his shoulder. You don’t know if he can even distinguish what you say, but he gets the point, adding a third finger while bringing his flesh hand right to your clit.

“James, holy shit.” Your legs feel weak and your sight gets blurry as he slides his fingers faster while circling your clit. The contrast between the coldness and warmth of his hands… and the wet sounds, plus his whimpers drive you crazy. So crazy that you come without warning, biting into his shoulder pretty hard as you feel the pleasure getting even more intense. He hisses in pain, but also bliss because he actually enjoys it when you get so feral.

It takes you a few seconds to finally be able to pull away from Bucky. You watch him with your eyes semi-open as he brings his hands, one at a time, to his mouth and licks all the wetness, and comes without looking away from you. 

You groan. “I need to call you old man often if I get this.”

But he doesn’t like this based on his frown. “Doll, you don’t need to call me old man to get this. Do I not make you come enough?”

You snort. Not enough? You’ve never thought you can come so hard and so many times before you got together. You didn’t go past three orgasms when you masturbated, not even with your favorite vibrator. So it’s a little funny he thinks this is not enough, but you ignore it. “Daddy then?”

He chokes. “What?”

“Should I call you daddy?” You expect him to laugh or frown, but he’s pretty speechless. And when your eyes stop on his shorts again, you gasp. He’s even more aroused… “Oh my god, James, you’re so hard.”

“It’s not my fault,” he says immediately, and you don’t remember the last time you saw him so red and flustered. By a word you said. “You make everything, even that, sound hot.”

“I don’t blame you, daddy.” You smile at him, grabbing his metal hand. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of, now come with me.”

You don't drag him to the bedroom as he expects. The coach is just as fine at the moment, no need for something else. Especially when you want him so badly.

You let go of his hand just to try and take off your bathing suit. You could just pull the bikini aside, but he loves your breasts and you prefer skin-to-skin contact. You love feeling him.

“Baby?” He asks when he hears you cursing the knot he made under your breath. The bottoms were so easy to take off, but you can't manage to undo your top at all.

“Can you help me, please?” You ask when your arms start to feel numb. He smirks as he unties and takes off your bikini top in seconds, using only one hand. You shiver when you feel him placing a light kiss on your shoulder before returning in front of you.

“All done, doll.”

You roll your eyes at his smug expression. He can do better things with that mouth.

But you don’t say anything, only staring at his face, then down at his trunks, so he immediately gets the idea. You smile when you see his shorts on the floor, then point to the couch behind you. “Good boy, now sit there.”

“Why?” He plays dumb because he knows how much you enjoy it.

“Because I want to make myself come with your cock. Is this what you wanted to hear?” You fight the shyness you usually feel to say these words out loud. You’re well aware he loves it when you speak like this and how crazy it drives him. “That I want to use you to get myself off and if you’re good, I would let you come inside me?” You can’t stop your cheeks from getting red, though, but he doesn’t make any remark regarding that. Instead, he lifts his eyes from your breasts to your face and nods, following your order quickly.

The moment he spreads his legs, you bite your lip. You feel physically unable to look away from his hard-on as you climb his thighs, one leg after another. You’re so wet you can’t believe it…  If you sat on him all the way down, he’d probably get just as wet.

“Want you to use me,” he barely whispers, bringing his dick to your entrance while gripping your right hip with his metal hand. You tilt your head back instinctively and begin to lower yourself on his cock. Little by little.

“Bucky.”

His fingers are on your breast all of a sudden, deliberately avoiding your nipple as he fondles it. You moan, a little sweaty and needy, enjoying every touch, but he makes no sound. And you know he is holding back on purpose. To challenge you.

And you never back off from a challenge. Especially an easy one like this because you know what to do.

Taking more of him inside you steals a whimper out of him instantly. Not a moan, but it still gives you immense satisfaction. You basically won with no effort, and he knows it. He probably wanted it this way.

“Fuck me, baby.” You hear his voice right above your ear. It’s so raspy and low. “Take what you want, I’m here for you.”

You know this isn’t gonna last long, and you don’t need it to because you’re so wet and close already. And so is he. You’ve been teasing each other all morning.

When you start moving faster, you find yourself using his shoulders as support. And it’s perfect! The thrusts are better like this since you can use more strength, and he helps a lot.

You're breathless when his metal fingers find their way to your clit, repeatedly circling and pinching it just the way you always like it. “James…” You can’t even continue because you're suddenly hit by a wave of pleasure. Then another. Then another.

He has to start thrusting back since you're so lost in your orgasm you can barely move at all, your head falling into the crook of his neck. But just for a couple of seconds since your moans and the feel of you push him over the edge quickly.

“B-baby,” he groans, still touching your clit, but you can’t bring yourself to tell him to stop. You’re not very sensitive, and he’s in his own universe right now.

“You fill me up so good, bubba.” You manage to say between deep breaths, encouraging him to keep coming.

When he finishes, his hands drop on your ass, squeezing it gently. “Fuck, baby. This was amazing.”

You nod a little sleepy against his chest and leave a kiss right there. “Ihm, it was. Maybe I should change your name.”

You don’t need to look at him to know he’s frowning, confused. “What?”

“You know… since you don’t like old man that much, maybe I should have you as my daddy.”

“Doll.” You snort at the tone he uses and raise your head to look at him while he wraps his arms around your waist.

“I meant on my phone, silly.”

His mouth opens. “You have me as ‘old man’ on your phone?!”

You bite your lip not to laugh and decide to peck his cheek. “Can you bring me some water, daddy?” You emphasize the last word just to tease him. His expressions are too funny, how can you not?

“Doll, I swear-”

You burst into giggles. “See? Totally an old man… can’t sense a joke.”

[icarus-does-fall]

The safeword comfort fic!!!

It's an Astarion x gn reader <3

(I *can* write gendered pairings but as a trans guy I just like the gender neutral things, everyone can relate that way🤷‍♂️)

.𝆤࿙࿙࿚๋࿙࿚ ⊱♡⊰ ࿙࿚๋࿙࿚࿚𝆤. .𝆤࿙࿙࿚๋࿙࿚ ⊱♡⊰ ࿙࿚๋࿙࿚࿚𝆤.

You and Astarion had been on again, off again lovers- Or so more easily explained as friends with benefits. You could put up with his rude sarcasm and haughty behaviours and he trusted you enough to open up about Cazador- That was the first night the two of you slept together too.

It wasn't on purpose, hell neither of you even expected it to happen, but with there being a new moon in the sky, all the stars were visible as the two of you talked. The emotions were running high and as Astarion shared his part, his scars with you it was almost instinctual to reach out and with a feather light touch run your hand over his jagged skin.

He gasped at the touches. No one had ever touched him so softly… so reverently. Then of course one thing led to another and then more nights like that started happening, you waking up covered in bite marks and Astarion with nail marks down his back.

Every night between the two of you was pure bliss, until tonight at least.

His fangs were sunk deep in your neck, you’d never given him permission to fed off of you but that didn’t mean you didnt like it when he bit you either, but after a particularly rough fight- One where he and Karlach almost died you’d finally given the okay for him to fed.

The only problem was that he was getting too lost in your blood, and how it tasted to pay attention to much else at the moment. The more he mumbled about “how divine you tasted”, and “how he wanted to devour you,” the more your vision started to blur and spot. While it was enjoyable at first, the pain and pleasure mixing, the pain was starting to overtake the pleasures he was giving you at the same time.

So with bated breaths and your eyes fluttering closed, you gasped out the words you needed to make Astarion realise that you couldn’t go any further, tears brimming your eyes. “ “Starion… I can’t- D-d… fuck ‘Starion Donnybrooke! Pull out, stop, please.”

Astarion paused, the word sending him almost rigged before he blinked, pulling himself back to his senses and pulled away from you. Both of your bodies were covered in sweat, in slick, and cum but Astarion also had blood dripping down from the corner of his mouth. His tongue flickered over his lips. “Oh my divinity~ I pressed too far didnt I?”

Astarion carefully pulled you into his side, there weren't many things in his overly long life that he found himself caring about but you- By the gods above, you were his treasure, even if he didn't have any claim to you. Gently he caressed your hair and softly kissed your forehead. “Are you alright my firelight?”

You curled up into Astarions side, your head left light and you were dizzy, the tears falling down your cheeks didn't help any either. “I’m okay… I’m okay, just too much too fast, the pain wasn't fun anymore.”

Astarion wiped away your tears, pulling you into a gentle kiss before he softly kissed at the bite mark he had been drinking from and licked away any of the dried blood, all before moving down to the rest of your body, to kiss and caress every bite, every bruise and every scar on your body whether he was the one to leave those marks or the fight was.

“My apologise dear divinity, it has simply been some time since being allowed to feed from someone who doesn't fear my touch. How may I help pleasure you into ease, into safety instead?”

You nestled closer to his chest and let your head fall against him, your body aching and sore as you tried to regain your senses. “Just hold me for a bit, yeah? I know… I know we don't really cuddle but yeah…”

Astarion laughed softly and continued to hold you against his chest, his fingers being entangled in your hair as he nuzzled against your cheek, his other hand casually drawing soft circles along your thighs and your scars. “Oh my divinity, I cherish every moment that I get to have you in my arms, never think I would never want to hold or… Cuddle you~”

You smiled up at him with a soft laugh and tucked a stray piece of hair behind his ear. You never knew how but no matter how rough and wild the two of you got, his hair always looked perfect. Hell in your eyes this sarcastic bastard was perfect but somewhere in the back of your mind you knew things wouldn’t work if you two became serious. He’d outlive you, outlast you, but that didn’t stop you from loving him while you could.

“Have I mentioned that I love you recently? Because I do… You always know just how to touch me to make me feel safe.”

Astarion smiled down at you and kissed your forehead. “You have, but I would quite appreciate hearing you saying more often~”

You huffed and pouted playfully, lightly smacking him on his chest. “Oh you pompous ass, just shut up before I stop saying it at all.”

Astarion laughed loudly and kissed you softly, nuzzling into the crook of your neck before peppering soft kisses up your neck and along your jaw. “I know my little flame, I’ll behave, I promise. I just enjoy teasing you~ And it’s not often you complain either.”

You giggled and blushed while you rolled your eyes. “You're an idiot ‘Starion… Hmm… We have any cocoa left?”

He raised an eyebrow at your change in conversation but smiled softly anyway. “I don't believe so but for you my divinity, I'd give you the world~”

Your blush darkened slightly and you cuddled closer into his side. He pulled a blanket over the two of you, after all he wasn't exactly known for his warmth. “Again, you're an idiot… Just now you're a cute idiot.”

“Oh darling, you flatter me but we both know I am radiant~ More so than cute will ever be. You on the other hand, you my darling are the divine light from the heavens themselves and desperately adorable”

You were really flustered now, and blushing a bright red. “I- you- Shut up Astarion! I’m just me, nothing more, nothing less.”

“Which is why you deserve all those compliments, all the praise. You are a divine creature and deserve everything, more than I could ever give you.”

You smiled softly and gently caressed his cheek. “You give me everything that I want-” You giggled and kissed his nose. “I’m safe with you.”

His gaze softened as he looked at you and he sighed softly. You cared, you loved, you were warmer, more so than anyone he’d ever let into his life and he was afraid to break that. Afraid to break you. But as long as you'd let him, he’d love you with his entire being.

In a voice barely above a whisper he spoke in an awed and almost reverent way. “I love you my divinity, may I have the honour of making you mine?”

You looked up at him, mouth agape as your words failed you. Of all things you thought you’d hear Astarion ever ask you, ever say to you, this was never one of them.

“Me? You're choosing me? ‘Starion, are you sure?”

“Of course I'm sure my flame~ I never make a decision without being confident in case you have yet to notice that.”

“Then yes of course I’d be honoured to be yours! Just… be more careful next time yeah?~”

Astarion chuckled and nodded in agreement. “You have my word~”

[yakerriah]

KIERAN (LOVE AND DEEPSPACE) x OC SMUT

CHAPTER 10

Kieran slammed Nemo against the wall of the club, his grip firm on her arm. She groaned seeing blindsided by the sudden impact, as she struggled to catch her breath.

    "Hey, what the hell are you doing?" The guy she was conversing with grabbed Kieran's shoulder and he jerked his head towards him.

    "She my fucking wife, mind your business you fucking numbskull," Kieran lied, and the man eyes widened before he lifted his hands up and slowly back away from them.

   When he looked back at her, his eyes blazing as he leaned in close to her with a low, menacing voice. "Stay the fuck away from my brother!" Kieran growled against her face.

    Nemo still winced, but met his gaze steadily as she fully stood up so they were eye-to-eye, though she couldn't see it because he had his motorcycle helmet on. 

     "Stay away from him? His job is to be near me," she retorted, pushing against his shoulders to break the closeness against her.

    "And who the hell are you to put your hand on me like that?" she yelled, before she punched the front of his helmet, snapping his head back and cracking the visor on the helmet. "Have you lost your damn mind?"

    "Don't play coy. I don't know what your game is, but trying to fuck Luke isn't part of it," Kieran snapped, as he threw his body against her against the wall while he looked her between his arms pressed against it. He noticed all the way she kept teasing and touching Luke.

    Meanwhile, Nemo realized she was too weak to really fight Kieran off and how she expect to do anything to Sylus in her state. She didn't expect him to be this aggressive over a little teasing with Luke, is everyone obsessed with controlling someone?

     "Is he not a grown-ass man?" Nemo shot back, facing him without fear as their nose was just a couple of inches apart. "Luke isn't something for you to desperate keep under your boot. He knows what he wants, and he wants me."

     I'm warning you, Nemo. Don't push me into doing something to you, that's you'll regret," Kieran said, jabbing his finger in her face.

     "Do what? You're not going to do shit," she yelled, swatting his finger away. Kieran put his finger back, unyielding. "You're too pussy to go against anything you think would make Sylus angry and he'll fuck you up if you put hands on me."

    "Not if you won't tell," Kieran shouted over the pounding music as he continued poking his finger in her face.

     "Get your finger out of my face!" she demanded, hitting at it again. "And the hell I wouldn't, I'm not above snitching!"

     "Hit me one more time, and I swear I'll fuck you up," Kieran threatened, grabbing her throat with a rough grip as he pushed her against the wall. She gasped for air, before she lifted her hand and punched him in the side of his helmet once again, knocking his head to the side.

    "Don't you ever," she yelled, she pressed her finger against the side of his helmet multiple times as he released her neck. Kieran narrowed his eyes, his expression hardening as he calmly let her.

---

Later, in the bathroom of a hotel, Nemo found herself looking at reflection in the vanity mirror. Her face flushed, her body disheveled, and her brown lips swollen so much that it was now red. She struggled to stand as she groaned in pain leaning over the sink. Despite her state, her wide smile indicted enjoyment.

     "You won't tell anyone about this, will you?" Kieran asked as he stood behind her, he grabbed her hair lifting her head from the sink as she winced in pain. "Will you?"

     "Ah, no, no, I won't, fuck," Nemo groaned, her eyes hardly opened as she glanced at him—his mask partially askew, revealing his agape mouth as he pants heavily. She bit her bottom lip as she found herself looking into his focused eyes. "Right there, yes, you're doing so good."

    "I know, so be quiet so I can keep doing good," Kieran stated gruffly, his hand tightening around her coils and his other around her throat as he thrusted into intensely. The sound of wet skin slapping against skin filled the small bathroom as Nemo struggled to keep her legs from buckling under how relentless he was being. "Gosh, look at that stupid face. Can't think of anything else except my dick right now."

       "S-shut...the fuck...up," Nemo managed to respond between her whimpers, unable to fully suppress the pleasure coming between her lips. "You face...is fucking...mhm...it's stupid."

    Luke didn't respond to her statement, but he noticed her trembling legs. He pulled away, his eyes stared at how his dick sloppily fell out of her entrance. Nemo turned around looking just as annoyed as he felt pulling himself out of her.

    "What?" Kieran asked her. "You want more? And you can't even stand for much longer?"

   "It's because I was holding you up the whole time," she said, her arms crossing over her bare breasts as she fully turned around and walked towards the bathroom door. "I'm going to lie on the bed."

    "I'll be there in a minute," Kieran said, his face looked indifferently at her and she didn't seem to care as she closed the door behind her.

    Kieran walked towards the mirror vanity, he fully took off his mask to run cold water over his face. He placed his hand against the wall feeling very guilty of what he was doing. It was hypocritical of him to tell Luke to stay away from Nemo, and yet he didn't do the same, but if he has to do that by making sure she looks at him instead?

    "I'm willing to do it, to protect Luke," he said to himself looking at the same face he shared with his brother. Except he found himself unable to look any longer before he lifted himself up to walk out the bathroom.

    Nemo was sitting in the middle of the bed with her phone in her hand. Kieran walked towards her and asked, "What are you doing?"

    "Oh, nothing, Luke was texting me," she said, and Kieran crawled over her pushing her arm above her head and pushing the phone from her hand. Nemo chuckled as she looked at his unmasked face. "You have a really cute face, and Luke has the exact same face?"

    "Yeah, but my face is a little better," Kieran said, crossing both her legs to one side of his hip before he guided himself back into her. She should not be thinking about Luke at all.

    Nemo whined loudly at how he was entering her in a new position. Kieran could tell she liked it, with the way she was leaking over him.

    "It's okay," Kieran said, as his hand pressed against her ass to steady her while she lay on her side. "It's just a big dick, you can handle it."

   He slowly pushed into her, and she exhaled with a few more whimpers as he obviously hit a sensitive area she couldn't handle as well. Her hand grabbed his wrist to have some sort of control again, while he watched his dick come out wet all the way down to the tip before he slowly pushed in again.

     "Your dick is so good," Nemo said, tears collecting in the corner of her eye and she smiled at him. "You make me feel so good, does it feel good for you?"

   Kieran leaned forward, she he was hovering over her face. "Yes, why are you talking so much?" he said, as he stared into her eyes barely staying open.

    "Because I like it so much," she said wrapping one of her arm around his neck.

    "Do you?" Kieran said softly, though he didn't mean to and he found himself kissing her. He didn't mean to do that either.

      Suddenly, Kieran's phone rung, interrupting what Kieran was happened was interrupted. He pulled himself abruptly from the kiss as he reached for his phone that had fell across the bed.

     "Dude, where did you go? I can't find Nemo," Luke's voice crackled through the phone. His voice was loud and very concerned over the club's loud background noise.

     Kieran glanced down at Nemo, slowing his movements to avoid making too much noise but still maintaining a steady rhythm.

    "I took her to a hotel," he responded, and Nemo looked at him in surprise as she lifted up her head. "Why? You weren't watching her like you should, so you obviously didn't care."

     "Yeah, listen, I'm sorry," Luke said, stumbling over his words. He didn't seem to assume Kieran meant anything sexual when he said he took Nemo to a hotel. Kieran felt relieved hearing his brother come a little to his sense. "I just wanted to have fun for one, and now I'm more sober from her I realize what I did wrong. I swear, I'm sorry."

    This is why he had to keep her away from him. Luke is way too sheltered and doesn't know how to deal with his feelings. Kieran knew he couldn't allow Luke to get too close to Nemo, even if it meant compromising his own morals. His eyes flickered over Nemo as he watched her ass jiggle underneath his movements.

     "Nemo is a dangerous woman. There's a reason Sylus wanted her on tight security," Kieran said, his voice cold as he looked at his reflection through the dark window of the hotel. Nemo looked at him, opening her mouth as if she were going to say something, he instead slipped his thumb in her mouth, and she bit down as he thrusted into her with increase forced in retaliation.

   She whimpered loudly, and Kieran eyes widened knowing Luke heard that.

    "Is she okay?" Luke said, Kieran still annoyed that he was still concerned about her even when they were genuinely talking.

    "Yes, she's quite drunk so she stumbled off the bed," Kieran said to save himself. "Just, don't get ahead of yourself with this...siren."

     "I know, but is it really a problem for me to like her company?" Luke chuckled on the other end. "I know everything is about work with you, but let's enjoy her too."

     "Enjoy what?" Kieran snapped, though he was thoroughly enjoying her body right now. "Our job is to assist and make sure she doesn't get into trouble, not to be friends, boyfriends, or whatever bullshit is occupying your mind about her!"

     "It's not like that," Luke muttered, as the club background noise became quieter. "I'm on my way back home. I'll call you again when I get there."

     "Be safe," Kieran replied softly, his voice tinged with a hint of relief as he ended the call and looked at Nemo who could interpret part of the conversation.

      "Dangerous? Why are you trying to put that into his head while you're doing this to me?" she asked him.

     Kieran's expression was unreadable as he stared at her. "I can't have a serious conversation with you while I'm inside," he said, biting his bottom lip. He grabbed pushed her onto her stomach and grabbed her forearms, pulling them back. With a newfound strength, he pounded her with raw intensity, it made the bed shake underneath them with each forceful thrust.

     Nemo responded with crying moans that mixed in with Kieran's erratic breathing. He found himself moaning as his eyes rolled to the back of his head as he finally reached his climax. His pelvis jerked forward with each forceful throb pushing him cum inside her. After a few thrust, he finally became overstimulated before he pulled out with his condom hanging heavily at the end from his semen.

    "Now, do me a favor and leave Luke alone," Kieran bent over to whisper into her ear before he smacked her ass.

      "Is that the only reason why you fucked me?" Nemo asked, turning to face him as her lips brushed against his. Sweat glistened on her body, and she wrapped her arms around him, touching the back of his head. "Or is that what you're going to pretend happened?"

      Kieran pulled away from her, his expression hardening from her still not listening to him. "You can find your way back home, right?" he asked, tossing the used condom into the trash.

    "You know I can't," Nemo replied, her voice tinged with annoyance but also amusement. "You said you brought me here because I was drunk, right? Let's stay here together."

     "I'm not staying in the same room as you," Kieran said, pulling his mask fully over his face. "I'll book another room, and you can stay here. Don't leave for the rest of the night."

      "I'll try not to," Nemo muttered jokingly, massaging her aching neck as Kieran walked out of the bathroom.

[cozyenigma]

Dinner Date

Word Count- 1002

Request?- Nope!

Summary- You'd run into the adventurer a few times now and... helped yourself to a few finds. You didn't expect him here or for the shoe to be on the other foot

Warnings- None

Your meal had barely even started when it was ruined. 

It was a nice place. A high end place. Places you usually have to make reservations for at least a couple weeks in advance. A place where you had to slip the hostess a very generous tip to get a table on short notice. You deserved it, you worked hard.

The view was spectacular, your glass was full of wine you hadn't even touched, and there was even live music playing softly from a far corner. This was the kind of place people from money dined in. You weren't from money, per say, but you could walk in those circles when you needed to.

You popped another appetizer, something bite sized you hadn't looked at the menu, and sat back in your chair. Treating yourself never tasted so nice. 

The waiter came by with your plate of food, steaming and glistening in the low light, and you were practically drooling. Plate had hardly touched the table when he showed up. The waiter has just turned to leave and, too taken with the food, you hadn't noticed the uninvited guest until the chair opposite moved.

You'd recognise the smug face anywhere. Even dressed up in a crinkled dress shirt and jacket, Illinois wasn't hard to miss.

"Really?" You deadpanned, spreading a napkin out across your lap.

"I can't drop in on an old friend?" He asks, leaning an elbow on the table and looking entirely too pleased with himself.

Not deigning to answer, you instead gesture up towards your head. The man takes a minute to catch your drift before his eyes dart up to that stupid cowboy hat. Even if it did have a certain charm, it didn't fit with his outfit nor did it fit with anything else in the building.

"What? I'm not taking it off for this place."

"You look ridiculous."

"I look amazing, excuse you." He readjusts in his seat, pointedly changing the subject. "Anyways, I wanted to catch up. See what you've been up to."

"None of your business and we're not friends."

Illinois almost looks put out as you say that. You shrug, finally taking a bite of your meal and nodding in approval.

"Can't help but notice this isn't your usual kinda haunt," he continues.

"What, I'm not allowed to have class?"

A short laugh that has a few older guests turn to look at the two of you. "You and I both know you're way more at home in some back alleys than fine dining."

You hummed around the next bite, idly twirling your fork. "So you're saying I'm a cheap date?"

"Something like that. Where'd we run into last?" Illinois looked almost annoyed as you shrugged. 

"I don't know... Outside some pawn shop in Rome?" 

"Try a side street in Rabat."

Feigning thinking about it for a moment, you nodded. "Yeah I guess we did bump into each other there too, huh?"

"Uh huh. Don't suppose I can ask for that statue back?"

"Oh you can. You're not gonna like the answer though." You pop another bite in your mouth. "I will say thanks for paying for the meal."

Illinois scrubs a hand down his face. "You sold it then? And the necklace? God don't tell me you pawned them, please."

"Psh, pawn shops are a rip off and you know it. Private collectors on the other hand... Well, there's a reason I'm going to them and not a museum."

"Do your clients care that you're peddling stolen artifacts?"

You were about to fire back when the waiter approached. Wine bottle in one hand, he haltingly asks if the gentleman would like to order. The fact that you had only gotten a table for one might be why you were both getting weird looks from the staff.

"Thanks but I'm fi-"

"He'll have what I'm having," you cut him off, tone far too pleasant. 

The waiter nodded and disappeared back to the kitchen. You couldn't help but take a bit too much enjoyment out of his glare.

"Oh cmon, you don't wanna enjoy what those artifacts got us?"

Illinois jabbed a finger your way. "There is no us cuz you stole them from me."

"I fail to see how my stealing is different from your stealing," you said, continuing before Illinois could, "You don't strike me as the kind of guy who goes through all the proper channels. Gets all the permits and paperwork in order before jumping right in. I had just as much right to those artifacts as you did."

You watched his jaw clench. "I offered to take you under my wing. It didn't have to be like this."

The conversation slammed to a halt again as the waiter brought a second plate of food. Delicious as it looked, Illinois didn't look away from you for a second. Didn't even say anything to the waiter.

"It's good, really," you said. You were close to polishing off your portion.

"You're gonna try and stick me with the bill aren't you?"

"And what, stiff the lovely staff here?"

"Oh I'm sure you'll tip generous.”

You shrugged, going to take a sip of your drink. "Not very gentlemanly of you, Illinois."

"Not very-"

The dessert had come then which, to be honest, you forgot you ordered. A tall, generous slice of chocolate cake with mouse and a mirror glaze and everything. It was perfect.

And then Illinois cleaved it in half with his fork. You could only watch in horror as he shoved at least a good third of that cake into his mouth. 

"Good choice," he said, still chewing.

"God you're disgusting," you push your chair back and stand, storming off towards the bathroom. 

"Disgustingly handsome?" He calls after you. You pointedly ignore him and the stares. 

He better enjoy that cake, you thought. Cuz there was a window in that bathroom just begging to be used as an escape route. You worked hard, you deserved an Illinois free night out anyways.

[lenaspeaksthings]

Summer 75 // Heat wave - Matty Healy

A/N: litch just me trying to get out of my writers block

-day twelve-

content warnings: smut, he's litch just a whore whining for (and riding.) the strap xx, MDNI I swear to fuck

Your fingers stick to the pages of your book from the sweat, making it near impossible to turn them properly. The sheets feel too hot, so you pick them off you, leaving you splayed across the mattress, wishing for a cool autumn instead of the hellish heat you’re currently experiencing. It feels like there's a bonfire burning right in front of you, the small fan in your hand barely cooling you off. The lacey white curtains are closed to keep some of the sun out, darkening the room slightly. 

You can hear footsteps walking up the carpeted stairs onto the second floor, getting louder and louder as they approach your cracked door, a messy, damp head of curls peeking out from behind it. Matty knocks lightly, smiling as you beckon him in, glancing over your book. “It’s fucking blazing, innit? Can’t be arsed doing anything in this heat.” he speaks, wiping sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand, loudly exhaling as he enters the room, stopping right at the foot of the bed. 

Matty’s bare chest shines with sweat, and you can tell he’s breathing heavier than usual. Shorts hang low on his hips and he’s rid of all jewelry, presumably because of the unbearable heat. “Can’t take this anymore, ugh. Clothes feel like a fucking prison” he complains again, pacing the length of the room and running a hand through his hair, inhaling deeply before settling his eyes back on you, dressed in a white shirt and underwear, your clothing just as sparse as his. He tugs at the bottom of his shorts, trying to let air flow under the fabric. 

“Can take the rest off, I don't mind.” you grin, putting your book down next to you. Matty raises an eyebrow at you, the corners of his mouth turning up into a sly smirk. You eye him up and down, making no effort at all to hide your staring, much to his enjoyment. “Hm? Yeah, sure, alright then.” Matty’s words are smooth, almost nonchalant as he lets his hand move from the hem of his bottoms to the button, slowly undoing it, never breaking eye contact. 

The waistband of his calvins peeks out from beneath his shorts as he lets them fall around his ankles, watching how your eyes widen and lips part, admiring him from your spot on the bed. “Don’t stare, it's rude.”

You roll your eyes at his words, shooting him a dangerous look as he bites his lip lightly, cracking the bones of his knuckles as the tension between the two of you grows.  

“Stop teasing and I won't stare.” you shoot back, swiping your tongue along your bottom lip and Matty kneels onto the bed, the mattress dipping beneath you. You lay back, putting your hands behind your head and looking at him through hooded eyes, earning a confused look from Matty. “Obviously you want something, baby.” you state, your eyes raking over his body and landing on the growing bulge in his boxers. “Need you to tell me what that is.” 

Matty exhales sharply, pupils blown out as he stares at your chest, nipples hard and visible through the thin material of your shirt. You smirk, motioning for him to answer your question. Matty stutters over his words, his eyes averting yours and wandering in the direction of your bottom nightstand drawer, his face flushing a deep red. 

“J-just-” he starts, words getting caught in his throat as you stretch your arms above your head, letting your shirt ride up your stomach. Letting your hands fall onto your chest, you look back down, an expectant expression on your face. “Hm?” you hum, signaling your growing impatience as Matty slowly crawls further up the bed, resting his hands on your bare thighs, rubbing his fingers over the skin. 

“Want you to fuck me, please.” his voice cracks pathetically as you suck in a deep breath, exhaling out your nose and nodding at Matty. “Yeah? Do it then, baby, I'm not stopping you.” 

His eyes widen slowly as you brush your hair out of your face, the pieces framing it slightly curled from the heat. You can see how turned on he is, apparent from the way his hand trembles as he reaches for the drawer, opening it and pulling out the strap you both know and love. You can feel him rock hard against your thigh, leaking into his boxers as he runs his fingers over the toy, memories flashing through his mind. 

He hands it to you, expecting you to get up, flip him over, fuck him fast and hard, just how he likes it. Instead, you shake your head, wetting your lips once again before speaking. 

“You don't need my help, baby, go on.” Matty looks confused again, needing a few seconds before fully grasping what you meant. God, the look on his face is priceless when he finally does.   

He scoots back down the bed with heavy breaths and shaky movements, lifting one, both of your legs to slide it onto your body. Matty taps your hips to signal you to lift them, tightening the clasps as you watch him struggle to keep his composure, groaning every time his cock brushes against the mattress, or your leg. His hand fists the toy, looking up to make eye contact with you, blushing and panting, the sight of him slowly jerking off a fake cock for your enjoyment affecting you more than you thought it would. 

“Put that pretty mouth to use, yeah baby?” you say, words dripping with lust as Matty whines, nodding eagerly. You watch closely as his tongue darts out to lick the tip, toying with it as if it were real, putting on a show for you. A moan spills from your lips at how fucking hot he looks, giving him the reaction he needs to take the toy down his throat, coating it in spit. Matty’s eyes water as he takes it deeper, choking and sputtering with effort. 

“God, you look like such a slut for me, so fucking pretty.” you praise, brushing a strand of hair out of his face lovingly as he continues moving up and down the strap, getting it nice and wet for you. 

You let him stay like this, sucking off a piece of plastic until the back of his throat is bruised and tears are rolling down his face. Grabbing him by the hair, you pull him off it, your thumb wiping at his cheek sweetly. “You’re so beautiful, baby, love you like this.” Matty whimpers as you motion for him to straddle you, his thighs bracketing your hips as his cock strains against his boxers, the front of them stained with precum. “Take those off for me, pretty, show me how much you want to fuck yourself on my cock, yeah?” you snap the waistband against his skin, your words smooth and unwavering as Matty stutters out a quiet, “Oh, fuck-”, ridding himself of his underwear in the blink of an eye. 

His hands rest on your chest, holding himself up as his cock rubs against your strap. Slowly, he raises his hips, groaning and whining with effort as he sinks down, feeling the burning stretch of the toy inside of him. You can't hold back the noises that leave your lips at his reactions, watching intently as he experimentally rolls his hips, crying out at the sensation. Matty’s moans are pornographic as he starts bouncing up and down, his cock leaking precum. You leave your hands behind your head, enjoying the view of Matty fucking himself immensely, whispering words of encouragement as his whines grow louder. 

“So fucking gorgeous for me, baby, being so good f’me.” You can see his eyes flutter shut as he angles his hips to hit his g-spot over and over, bringing himself to the edge embarrassingly quickly.

“F-fuck, darling, please.” he begs, more tears welling up in his eyes as you smirk at him teasingly.

“Need to cum, baby? Make a mess of yourself like a fucking whore?” you coo, cruelly laughing at Matty’s desperate nods. 

“Fuck, need it so bad, pleasepleaseplease– I c-can’t–” he whimpers, the blissed out expression on his face absolutely delicious. You nod slowly, groaning as Matty bites his lip, hard, his hands leaving your chest to feel himself up, running his fingers up and down his torso as his hips roll desperately, chasing his release. 

It doesn't take long for him to cum, spilling all over your shirt and chest, whining and moaning as he fucks himself through his high, eyes screwed tight in pleasure. His little gasps are like music to your ears, his face and chest flushed red as he comes down, the waves of pleasure slowly subsiding. “Fuck-” is the only word that leaves his lips as he falls limply onto you, smearing his chest with his own cum. 

“Did so good, baby.” you whisper into his ear, running a soothing hand through his curls. “I’m proud of you Matty, y’were so fucking pretty for me.” 

You can feel Matty nod into your chest, his arms coming up to wrap around you and pull you impossibly closer, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. 

“I love you,” he mumbles, voice weak and fucked out, words slightly muffled. You smile at the ceiling, your fingers rubbing small circles into his back as you just lay there, basking in each other's comforting presence.  

[papa-evershed]

I’m curious… what do you think are the sexiest gifs of Rob EVER? 😏 I’d love to see ‘em.

I apologize for my late answer but like a weirdo, I was just convinced that my choices would somehow be disappointing. 😅🙈 I just feel like most people are going to expect gifs of kissing scenes or skin but those aren't even the ones that make me the most feral. But I'll give it a shot. 😂

As always, under a read more for length but also for cringe worthy fangirling and NSFW thirst-talk.

Immediately, my first thought was this gif. When I say I adore this man's belly I fucking mean it. He's just so deliciously man-shaped. Tall and thick and soft in all the right places. I love a belly, lets me know that a person isn't too militant and allows themselves to indulge in life's pleasures. 😏😏 (I'm reading way too much into a belly but here we are.) Add in the fact that in this specific scene, Martin Evershed is being the ultimate soft, caring Dad™. He has every reason in the world to lose his shit on Sam but instead he actively chooses to be what she needs in that moment and it's just incredibly sexy because he is a whole ass Man™. I just wrote a fucking novel about this one gif but listen, there's a reason it's first that comes to mind.

The thumb in the mouth? 🙃

Speaking of Act On This, this one too. I'm not even sure if I can put my finger on exactly why this specific gif is one of my favorites. Perhaps because he's usually so smiley (which I adore) that a rare serious/stern look wrecks me. Another reason I want him cast as a villain. Just...yes, sir.

And on the flip side, these because he's just so soft again. I fucking love soft men, ones who don't seem to have that drive to constantly perform their own personal version of hyper-masculinity. (also, I'd suck a random dick off the street to get this in HQ)

I'm a simple creature and I like profiles, noses, and tits.

Like I said, I'm a simple creature and I am no better than any man.

When the right men manspread at the right time? Yes. Yes, that.

When Dad™ shows up to save the day? Get that man a beer and a blowjob.

And while I love it when a man is great with kids...I also think it's incredibly sexy when he's tired of their bullshit cause aren't we all sometimes? 😅

FUZZY GREY NECK? say no more. Also, I'd stand in a three hour long line to wait my turn to ride his thigh like he was the carousel at Disney World. I said what I said.

Hutch. Just Hutch. Everything about the character was sexy. And bless this t-shirt. The shoulders. The arms. The fuzzy neck. The nose. He could 100% talk me into sleeping in that creepy ass cabin and much like Phil, we'd also wake up naked and calling out to God.

Annnd because I feel like it's expected and it does deserve attention, this kiss with Papa E. Listen. Listen. So many fucking onscreen kisses go from 0 to 60 in .000005 seconds. Just immediate face-fucking right out the gate. And IDK about y'all but that shit just isn't enjoyable in real life. Don't assault my fucking face like a Dallas Cowboy's linebacker. 🙃 Ease into it. Warm up. Mr. Evershed will patiently take his time making you so anxiously desperate for more that when he finally does deepen that kiss your lips will be eagerly wet and ready...heh. 🙈

Anyway. 😳 I've been really good about not being thirsty on main anymore and this is still quite tame for me but I'm gonna stop now because this post could go on all night. 🫠

[iwoszareba]

truthbound

Knave/Socothbenoth

cw: questionable use of trickster powers of mind altering variety. (if i'm allowed VtM terms something like incomplete blood bond level of problematic.) also this is love-hate, awful, evil people ship

Socothbenoth's first dialogue was taken directly from the game

_ _ _

'Satisfaction' could not begin to describe how Socothbenoth felt. How can you properly put into words the pure euphoria of seeing your plans, that were years in the making, finally come to fruition?

The look of defeat on Nocticula's face will warm his heart for decades to come. To think that all it took was the right person at the right time for everything to fall into place. That and his invaluable guidance, of course. Helping to make the Crusade a spectacle of madness was an enjoyable diversion but there was nothing more he could gain from it.

"Well, now that everything is decided... I will bid you farewell, Knave. It is time for me to look for a new frien... I mean, someone new and exciting... Someone I can lead astray. I will convince them to join the glorious ranks of fools, jesters, and lovers of funny and vulgar stories! It's been a pleasure! I know you'll miss me!"

That's what he needed: a fresh start. But for now he could just kick back and bask in the afterglow of his accomplishments until it's time to set more goals or readjust the old ones.

"Don't you want to ask if I have a parting gift for you?"

He was already reaching for the door handle but that question stopped him in his tracks. He could just leave. He should just leave. But after all the crazy things this Knave-Commander pulled off… he couldn't deny curiosity. He turned around.

"You got me something? Darling, you shouldn't have. Getting to see you grow from a confused, bloodthirsty puppy, into a distinguished creature of chaos was a gift enough."

He expected to see him as usual: all smiles, craving any scrap of his attention, practically begging. Instead Knave looked at him with an unreadable expression, head slightly tilted as if considering. Somehow that was more concerning than any of his touch too wide grins. Curiosity wasn't worth this.

"Really it's fine… just send whatever it is via messenger, maybe that mangy thief of yours can drop it off at my place when he comes to the Abyss."

He grabbed the handle and pushed but his relief was disturbed by the sharp, electric sound of magic. As he took one step through the doors, a portal brought him face to face with the Commander once again.

"I can't believe you thought you could just leave without my say-so. I would take offence at the rudeness if it wasn't so adorable."

This was not how Socothbenoth imagined this goodbye. Maybe he miscalculated, maybe he shouldn't have implied earlier that they probably will never meet again. He often forgot that some people can get attached so easily. No matter, he can play along for a while more.

"Can you blame me? I am a busy man. Especially now, when you helped to create so many new opportunities for me. Something I'll always be grateful for."

"Tsk tsk, tsk. Liar, liar pants on fire. Do you ever get tired of your own bullshit?"

Socothbenoth opened his mouth but before he could find words to rebuke such insolence Knave continued his little tirade.

"I wonder if there is a single person you have ever been truly loyal to? I doubt you see anyone in your congregation as worthy enough, your lovers are tools to be kept or discarded, the Council was always a sham… you couldn't even keep a semi-decent relation with your own sister."

Mentioning Nocticula in such fashion was a step too far and even now it made Socothbenoth wince. He gritted his teeth and tried not to snarl his next words, but they still came out as an angry hiss.

"Is there a point to this?"

There was a level of smugness to Knave that only people who delight in hitting a nerve can display. Normally an attractive trait, not so much right now.

"I know such things are not in your nature and I don't blame you for that but… I admit it does make me curious. What would happen if I took all the honeyed words you fed me and made them true? Wouldn't that be refreshing? The sense that you said something and actually meant it."

Was that something he could do? Of course Socothbenoth heard the stories of Knave's exploits in Alushinyrra. Changing someone's form was not far from fleshwarping the demon lord would perform himself or teach to his faithful, but while similar in effect, Commander's powers seemed to work under a completely different paradigm. And physical matter still was nothing compared to something as intangible as 'the truth'.

"We can just talk about thi-"

Something deep inside him hummed, as if his very essence started to slightly vibrate awaiting what is going to happen to it next.

"You already talked plenty enough. Mmm what lies have you uttered... Maybe when you said you've been looking for someone exactly like me all these years?"

He was standing still but the sensation escalated to scraping at the back of his skull and squirming inside his chest. Impatient search for remembrance followed by a swift judgement.

"That was the truth! It's not my fault the meaning wasn't quite what you desired."

Knave nodded despite not looking convinced.

"I see, then what about those times you called me special… captivating… irreplaceable?"

The last word was the one that fully did the trick and started to ring at Socothbenoth's core with near-painful veracity. He felt feverish, as if his body was fighting to reject this foreign element, something so at odds with his demonic nature. But it was too late, this… connection has already taken root, strong and true, but twisted by the environment it found itself in. Addictive in its cravings and covetous in its devotion. Socothbenoth started to laugh hard enough that tar-like tears formed in the corners of his black eyes.

"What's so funny to you?"

The look of smug satisfaction on Knave's face was first replaced by confusion and then visible distress. He grabbed his chest as if to check the sensations there. Despite everything Socothbenoth couldn't help but delight in having the upper hand again.

"Oh, I just remembered something else I've said: we were made for each other, you were made for me."

Knave blinked in surprise.

"What? I don't recall anything like that."

Socothbenoth smiled lecherously, closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around Knave's waist bringing their bodies together.

"At the time I had you so deep in the throes of passion, no wonder you were a little… distracted."

"...You are lying."

It sounded as half-hearted bargaining of someone not ready to accept the reality.

"Does it feel like a lie?"

Knave was biting his bottom lip in frustration, quite a tantalising sight.

"No. I guess I made sure of that."

It was easy to expect this sentence to be punctuated with an angry groan but what followed instead was a soft rumble of laughter. Knave's next words were barely a whisper.

"It is kind of funny, when you start to think about it."

That was not really the word Socothbenoth would use to describe their situation, but if comedy is in the unexpected… he had to admit that in his long life as a demon lord he has never felt… this, whatever it was. They stood for a while in silence, both lost in their own thoughts, still wrapped in an embrace. Neither seemed willing to release the other but Knave was first to break the strange tranquillity of the moment.

"I still hate you, you know." 

Demon lord faux gasped.

"Shouldn't it be 'I love you more than anything else in this world'?" 

There was a pause for struggle between admission and denial.

"The two aren't mutually exclusive."

The amount of vitriol in his voice was delightful. The Commander was way more exciting like this compared to when he was acting all star-struck.

"I just thought you would be all pliant now."

He purred trying to rile him up more but instead Knave furrowed his eyebrows in consideration.

"I don't… fully understand what I did but I'm fairly sure it's not a compulsion nor geas. I don't have to do anything. And neither do you. If you wish, you are free to leave."

He waved his hand around in a specific but messy gesture and Socothbenoth could tell that the portal in the doors behind them deactivated. Which was a sweet sentiment but he was no longer in a hurry.

"I am a busy man but I may have another moment to spare. Other jesters and madmen will have to wait another day…"

He pulled Knave into a kiss that felt hungry to the point where it made him consider a crazy notion, that perhaps the two of them exchanged a fraction of their souls and would have to tear each other open if they wanted to get them back.