#like. of course this is just my personal interpretation & takeaway from the game

[cringefailcabitha]

Cabby and Bot in Spring on the Breakfast!

I've been thinking about Spring on the Breakfast and the clumsy way it handles Cabby's memory disorder and how that handling makes it a little harder to deal with what is going on between Cabby and Bot. And I kind of want to share my interpretation of some of what was going on:

By the beginning of Spring on the Breakfast, Cabby has been back in the game for 3 challenges, her return coming 2 episodes after Bot discovers the circumstances surrounding their creation. At this point, most of the remaining contestants, Bot included, do not see Cabby in a positive light. In particular, Bot's opinions about Cabby are heavily informed by what Test Tube has told them about her, and the general attitude of the other contestants towards her. Cabby, on her part, only figures out the circumstances of Bot's creation somewhere during episodes 11 and 13, and the two spend little time together before Spring on the Breakfast. Though not for lack of trying, Bot continues to be the contestant Cabby knows the least about by far, and that's what they are both working with when they are paired up for the Springtastic challenge. Let’s skip ahead a bit:

And Cabby obliges. Now, on one hand, there is an attitude towards Cabby and the files in the show that goes almost completely unchallenged up to this point that initially makes this scene feel like it's just piling onto that. Bot has already shared false information with Cabby under the impression that she doesn't care about them as a person, so this scene feels like a continuation of that thought process; an insinuation that Cabby immediately moving to write down Bot's words is an uncaring, or at least misguided gesture.

On the other hand, we can consider why Bot responds the way they do to Cabby's question. Firstly, the fact that they are willing to answer this question at all is notable and indicative of their changing opinions about Cabby. Bot quickly becomes defensive when Cabby questions the dissonance between Test Tube's presence upsetting them enough to hide from her, and the positive relationship she thought they had. This moment makes it clearer how reluctant Bot is to confront how they feel about Test Tube. (Small note but I think that even though Cabby wasn't there for The Confrontation in episode 8 and never worked with "Bot" before episode 14, one could argue that Cabby of all people having zero clue about Bot's complicated feelings towards Test Tube is also testament to their aversion to admitting it). So of course in the moment they don't want Cabby to write it down because it's intensely personal for them and they are ashamed for even feeling that way about the people who created them in the first place. Additionally, Cabby has said multiple times in previous episodes that she will share any information she has if asked; In this instance it's not unreasonable that Bot ends up requesting this.

Cabby, when asked, then shares some intensely personal information of her own, that she, too, has never shared with anyone else. This sort of exchange is common when forming an emotional bond with someone and I think it's the point where Bot goes from just doubting the negative things Test Tube and others have said about Cabby to fully deciding those things weren't true, While also starting to feel a lot safer around her. And at this point they share more about themselves, without Cabby writing any of it down. Afterwards:

This. It's very reasonable to be put off by the way this scene is framed, knowing that Cabby needs the files to remember things. It gives the impression that Cabby no longer using the files since the people around her can just remind her of things would be a positive thing. Which is an unpleasant message that encourages her to give up her independent nature and leave a lot of her perception of events up to the whims of the people around her. In fact, Cabby's takeaway from her interactions with Bot leads to her deciding not to rely on her files in the subsequent episode, in service of not making others uncomfortable, and even with encouragement she seeks permission from Bot to use her files.

However, one can also view this scene as Bot trying to convey they feel safe and comfortable enough around Cabby to want her to write about them. Not as them saying, "I'll tell you again so you don't need to write it down", but as them saying, "I'll tell you again so you can write it down". It is frustratingly indirect, as Bot tends to be at times, so it isn't a very obvious way to take it, but Bot seemingly having prepared a new folder for Cabby to write about them in between their elimination and Blue Buried supports this idea. Further, in preparing that folder, Bot tries to engage with Cabby on her level and show that they want to understand her, instead of further convincing Cabby that she can only make friends if she stops relying on her files that she needs, that she enjoys writing, and that are an important part of her identity. Bot choosing to get closer to Cabby is also a symbol of them breaking away from the expectations Test Tube places on them in that doing so directly contradicts Test Tube's sentiment towards Cabby and desire to keep Bot away from her. Test Tube keeping Bot away from Cabby in previous episodes is meant to be seen as part of Test Tube trying to hide the truth from Bot, and Bot deciding to form a bond with Cabby irrespective of what Test Tube thinks about her can be seen as them accepting and welcoming the truth. All of these things are important for Bot to do as a character whose development is centered around them finding and being proud of their own identity.

And in a way, if you interpret this scene as Bot wanting Cabby to write about them, it is also representative of Bot becoming more secure in their identity. Cabby's goal is to keep accurate data, and though she can and does change that data when new information becomes available to her, the act itself of writing things down can make things feel more concrete. So Bot inviting Cabby to write about them next time almost becomes an invitation to have that information be "official" because they feel surer about who they are,

[giriduck]

Been processing the recent Nintendo Dream Web article some more. Hot takes under the cut.

Of course Ganondorf would be sexy—just about everyone on BotW and TotK is conventionally attractive. The stated sexiness goal for Ganondorf feels really bad though—not only only because he’s the villain / antagonist of the game who also an in-universe POC, which opens a whole can of worms around fetishization, racism etc. (that many others have written about far far better than I ever could)—but it’s also jarring to hear about a design goal of maximizing sexiness in a LoZ game at all. They literally said the quiet part out loud—and that feels so weird and gross.

Thought experiment: take the excerpt below, but imagine this was about BotW Zelda.

Doesn’t that feel odd framed in that way? An interpretation would be along the lines of, “As a real departure from prior titles, we gave Princess Zelda pants in this game! The pants of a person who really takes care with their appearance: tight-fitting, to show off her curves and figure, like a real princess, whom men and women could fall in love with!” Although they never said that, it has a ring of truth to it, given this new context.

Only Zelda in BotW got to be a character with enough screen time to have real depth, because it was a story that used her as a lens to understand both her life and the world, whereas Ganondorf in TotK was (once again) treated as a disappointingly generic villain. Ganondorf’s lack of narrative development was not only a miss with regard to him as a character, but as an opportunity for some interesting, central-to-the-story / universe, world building. Given this, the interview only makes it extra disappointing that a goal was to also make him appear heroic in his art design, but the final game (as far as I’ve played, anyway) never expanded on that very interesting concept beyond a quick line mentioned in passing.

Evil for the sake of evil and/or sexy for the sake of sexy ends up being disappointingly shallow and reductive. Add in the complexities of real-world racial inequality and trauma, and this can quickly become disrespectful to players. At the very least, if the game creators were inspired by or going to potentially code characters in a way that is evocative of cultures outside of Japan, please bring in a diverse focus group to look at the content and provide feedback. As a large and influential content creator, please do the work to catch (either conscious or unconscious) harmful and frustrating stereotypes before you commit them into your final product.

I actively avoided Breath of the Wild for five years because I was so irritated by the newer Gerudo character designs—specifically the nonsensical lack of clothes and the desert high heels. I was immediately put off by what felt like a fetishy objectification of “exotic” women.

So it is extremely irritating to realize that they consciously did the same thing with Ganondorf.

Personally, Ganondorf’s character design in all his appearances throughout the franchise has been interesting to me—particularly his clothing, jewelry, and everything mentioned in the interview that he presumably would choose to wear—because it’s precious little for us to work with with regard to building our versions of this character in our minds. Accessories and clothing are a window into a character’s preferences. But in my opinion, his art design is also the least of what makes him interesting as a character. Sure, we got glimpses of his pecs and biceps in TotK, but what about his motivation? Canonical insight for why he does the things he does? His perspective on the political / power dynamics of the ancient era? Unlike Zelda in BotW, we never ���rode with Ganon” to understand this essential character to the game and franchise at all.

The biggest takeaway I am feeling from the interview is that I really wish that they had spent as much care giving him depth as they had done on his character design.

[hartofhearts]

Why Tifa is the only person, living or dead, who can resolve Cloud’s crisis

Alternate title: “What really happened in the Lifestream”

Of course the Lifestream scene has been discussed to death within the fandom. While some consider it one of the greatest triumphs of the Cloud/Tifa relationship and the game in general, others are quick to diminish its events and Tifa’s role. “Oh, any other childhood friend character who knew Cloud could do the job.” “Oh, Cloud only needed Tifa as moral support, he could have figured everything out himself.” “Oh, Aerith (maybe +Zack) could have done it by accessing her Cetra/time machine/empath/Planet powers.”

The Lifestream sequence is extraordinarily dense with many subtle visual cues, so there’s a lot to untangle and interpret. But no matter how you slice it, any take which downplays or eliminates Tifa is fundamentally missing the point of this scene, both for the plot and for Cloud’s character arc.

A lot of the confusion stems from a fundamental misunderstanding of what actually needs to happen in the Lifestream and why. Thus, using specific details from the sequence, I’d like to present my take on the following:

Part 1: What Cloud needs to accomplish in the Lifestream to advance the plot

Part 2: Why Tifa is the only person, living or dead, who can resolve Cloud’s crisis, where we will discuss fun things such as:

Why Tifa is the the focus of his greatest flaw

What Tifa’s presence in the Lifestream accomplishes

Part 3: Why those “Tifa-less” fan theories just can’t work

This is a very long ride so let’s get to it!

Part 1: What Cloud needs to accomplish in the Lifestream to advance the plot

Many fans think that all Cloud needs to accomplish in the Lifestream is prove to himself that he existed before the Nibelheim incident. This seems to make sense, as Cloud’s mental break at Northern Crater was due him losing faith that he was truly Cloud Strife of Nibelheim, right?

But that isn’t the only thing that needs to happen. Consider this: Ex-SOLDIER Cloud does believe that he is Cloud Strife of Nibelheim for almost the entirety of the game’s first half. However, Ex-SOLDIER Cloud couldn’t correctly remember the Nibelheim incident back at Kalm, and he occasionally exhibits alarming behavior (his headaches, his attempts on Aerith’s life). So the goal of the Lifestream sequence is not to restore Cloud to this previous flawed state, but... to accomplish something more. Accomplish something that will resolve the aforementioned issues by strengthening him against Jenova’s influence.

There are two ways to strengthen Cloud against the influence of the Jenova hivemind:

Rebuild Cloud’s sense of self by identifying and accepting his personal weakness -- without writing a whole other post, individuals injected with Jenova cells are susceptible to influence by the Jenova hivemind if they have a weak sense of self and weak will; thus, Cloud needs to fully understand and accept who he truly is, weaknesses and all, in order to withstand further Jenova tampering

Establish the truth of the Nibelheim incident -- until then, silver-tongued Sephiroth/Jenova will always be able to cast doubt on Cloud’s existence using the discrepancies between Cloud’s and Tifa’s memories

And wouldn’t you know it, but the Lifestream sequence does end up accomplishing all three of these things. It:

Proves that Cloud Strife of Nibelheim existed before the Nibelheim incident

Rebuilds Cloud’s sense of self by identifying and accepting his personal weakness

Establishes the truth of the Nibelheim incident

Something to note re: #3 - Establishes the truth of the Nibelheim incident: this is actually extremely challenging to do, as the truth lies solely within Cloud, but is blocked due to his own mental weakness. This is why the Lifestream sequence begins with Cloud trying and failing to correctly remember the Nibelheim incident: while he superficially does want to understand the truth of the incident, deep down he does not want to acknowledge his personal failings that are on full display in the true memory. It is only after Cloud accepts his personal weakness that he is able to face the full truth, failings and all.

So really, #2 - Rebuild Cloud’s sense of self by accepting his personal weakness is the most pivotal portion of the Lifestream sequence, as this empowers Cloud on a personal level and also allows him to remember the Nibelheim incident correctly. And as it happens, this is the portion that only Tifa can help with.

Part 2: Why Tifa is the only person, living or dead, who can resolve Cloud’s crisis

We’ve just discussed how rebuilding Cloud’s sense of self by helping him accept his personal weakness is one of the most important goals of the Lifestream sequence--and now I’d like to explain how this can only be accomplished with Tifa’s help and no one else’s.

>> Tifa is the focus of Cloud’s greatest weakness

I think that every fan, including non-shippers and anti-Tifa fans, will agree that Cloud is insecure and has a desperate need for acceptance. But because he needs to resolve and accept this greatest weakness, his shame, the real question is... when did it become pathological? What is it focused on, and what makes it his tragic flaw? The answers will give us a hint as to what Cloud needs to come to terms with his true self.

This is shown to us in the Mt. Nibel memory--the day Tifa’s mother died. And it is actually explicitly told to us by a very important entity...

...A blacked out, silhouetted version of Cloud that casually climbs out of his slack adult form. This silhouetted version of Cloud represents the deep dark secrets about himself that Cloud has hidden away for so long, and it tells us what exactly is on its mind. 

Let’s review everything Deep Dark (DD) Cloud says:

Young Cloud: I began to think I was different... That I was different from those immature kids. That then... maybe... DD: Just maybe, they would invite me in. I thought that might happen, so I hung around...

...

DD: That night I called Tifa out to the well... I thought to myself Tifa would never come... that she hated me.

...

YC: This was the day... DD: Tifa's mother... T: The day Mom died...

...

DD: I don't remember the path I walked. Tifa missed her step. I ran to her... but didn't make it in time. Both of us fell off the cliff. Back then, I only scarred my knees but...

...

DD: Tifa was in a coma for seven days. We all thought she wouldn't make it. If only I could've saved her... I was so angry... Angry at myself for my weakness. Ever since then, I felt Tifa blamed me... I got out of control... I'd get into fights not even caring who it was.

(fade to black)

DD: That was the first time I heard about Sephiroth. If I got strong like Sephiroth, then everyone might...

(return to the nexus/Cloud’s mind)

DD: If I could just get stronger... Then even Tifa would have to notice me...

Many fans fixate on DD Cloud’s very first line (”just maybe, they would invite me in”), and I understand why--not only is the first satisfying eureka moment in the Lifestream, but it’s also deeply relatable. Who hasn’t felt like an outsider and wanted acceptance and approval? These same players then attribute all of Cloud’s motivations to this relatable feeling. “Cloud had a deep inferiority complex and wanted to prove himself to the world and that’s why he pretends to be the super coolest SOLDIER ever.”

But that interpretation completely ignores the other 90% of what DD Cloud says. The other 90% of Cloud’s shame is wrapped up in Tifa. “Tifa’s mom died... I tried to save Tifa, but I got off relatively unscathed while she suffered terrible injuries... Tifa must have hated me... I thought Tifa wouldn’t come to the well because she hated me... I wanted to be like Sephiroth so Tifa would notice me...” Even if a little bit of Cloud’s motivations are attributable to the contempt of the townspeople, the vast majority of it is focused on Tifa--would she always hate him? Would she ever notice him? Could he ever be worthy of her? DD Cloud’s dialogue reveals that Cloud’s shame and tragic flaw is completely centered on his need for Tifa’s approval. Perhaps only his pedestaled perception of Tifa, but Tifa all the same.

The "Cloud wants to impress all the kids” interpretation also ignores what the cinematography of this scene is telling us. The “big takeaway” of the Nibelheim memory and DD Cloud’s reveal is the single sentence that DD Cloud speaks after the memory is over and lights turn back on and they’re back at the nexus--the sentence that he “took away” from the previous scene. And look! It’s this one!

DD: If I could just get stronger... Then even Tifa would have to notice me...

THIS. THIS IS IT. This is the root of Cloud’s shame and explains his pathological need to misremember himself as a SOLDIER and thus misremember the Nibelheim incident at all costs: he was ashamed at his inability to rescue Tifa and Mt. Nibel, so he swore to himself that he would get stronger to earn her notice. Cloud needs to be strong so Tifa will notice him; thus, Cloud creates an illusionary world where he misremembers his own identity and the Nibelheim incident in a way that makes him a strong man that is finally worthy of her. 

This is the personal weakness that Cloud needs to resolve in the Lifestream with Tifa’s help: he needs to learn that it is okay to not be the strong man, because Tifa will accept him regardless.

(And, sidebar, Cloud’s need for Tifa’s approval is not just some fleeting childhood dream in the distant past--even in present day, Ex-SOLDIER Cloud can’t bear to remember how he failed to be a stronger man for Tifa, because even in the present day, Tifa’s opinion of him is all that counts.)

>> What Tifa’s presence in the Lifestream accomplishes

While the above proves how Cloud’s personal weakness (his tragic flaw) revolves around Tifa and his feelings for her... we now need to answer, why does Cloud need Tifa to be in the Lifestream with him to work through these feelings? And this, I believe, comes down to two, very subtle, shown-not-told points:

Cloud’s honesty depends on Tifa’s presence, as Cloud’s need for Tifa to understand his feelings is greater than his need to hide his painful weaknesses from himself

Cloud draws strength from “his important person” (no matter how you want to define her: his main motivation, the person he’s been in love with forever...) accepting him and providing moral support

Let’s work through these in order.

REASON #1 -  Cloud’s honesty depends on Tifa’s presence, as Cloud’s need for Tifa to understand his feelings is greater than his need to hide his painful weaknesses from himself

This one is very easy to miss, but is illustrated in two key ways. First, did you know that DD Cloud speaks early on in the Lifestream, even before the Mt. Nibel memory? His two lines are:

T: Now that you mention it, why did you want to join SOLDIER in the first place? I always thought it was a sudden decision you made... DD: ...I was devastated. ...I wanted to be noticed. Adult Cloud: ...I was devastated. ...I wanted to be noticed. I thought if I got stronger I could get someone to notice... T: Someone to notice you...? ...who? DD: Who...? ...You know who! ...You, that's who. AC: You... T: ...Me? Why!? YC: Tifa... did you forget... about those days?

Those two lines are definitely DD Cloud’s; in the earlier photos, we see that DD Cloud’s speech bubbles don’t have a background box. These new two lines are similarly background box-less. Moreover, these lines cannot be attributed to Adult Cloud or Young Cloud. See the below comparison photos:

DD vs. Adult Cloud’s vs. Young Cloud’s speech bubbles:

What’s very interesting is the tone of the second line (”Who...? ...You know who! ...You, that's who”); this is the only exclamation that Cloud uses in the entire sequence until all the revelations of the Nibelheim Incident re-memory. DD Cloud is startled into indignance that Tifa has no idea that he’s been trying to impress her all along. (DD Cloud is like, “Tifa, the past 12 years of my life were entirely motivated by you, are you telling me that literally none of this has gotten through to you!!?”) Even if DD Cloud were dormant and hidden this entire time, the ignominy of Tifa not understanding the effort he made for her for 12 years is just too much for him to suffer through silently. 

The significance of this moment is actually incredible: the Deep Dark Secret that Cloud has been hiding from this entire time, the Deep Dark Secret that Cloud would rather die/go comatose than acknowledge... this Deep Dark Secret indignantly reveals itself just because Tifa apparently doesn’t know about it! Cloud’s need for Tifa to understand his Deep Dark Secret is even greater than Cloud’s need to be honest with himself to prevent his clone coma. 

And this becomes a trend that continues up to the Mt. Nibel memory--Cloud is reluctant to revisit these memories, and only does so because he wants Tifa to understand his feelings. Almost every other line we see Cloud’s reluctance, his disbelief at Tifa’s cluelessness, and him forcing himself to open up so Tifa can know what he’s been obsessing over for 12 years. See the dialogue yourself (my notes in square brackets):

YC: Tifa...... did you forget...... about those days? [Cloud’s disbelief that Tifa doesn’t know]

...

YC:  It's important to me... I hate to say it but... It's a very important memory... [Cloud’s reluctance to revisit the memory]  Do you want to see it? Come on, hurry. [Cloud’s need for Tifa to see]

...

AC: ...a sealed up secret... wish... Tender memories... no one can ever know... [Cloud’s reluctance to revisit the memory]

YC: Do you know where this window goes to, Tifa? [Cloud’s disbelief that Tifa doesn’t know]  Fine... I'll go. [Cloud’s need for Tifa to see]

Again, this is a tremendous moment. Cloud is only motivated to honesty for Tifa’s benefit, and takes each reluctant step towards the truth because Tifa is right next to him with all her cluelessness. In his desire to be honest for Tifa, Cloud ends up being honest for himself as well... Tifa’s presence is the only reason why Cloud can be honest to himself in the Lifestream. If not for her, Cloud never would have broached those painful memories and never would have resolved his crisis.

One last thing I want to highlight is that Cloud wouldn’t open up like this for anyone. Reread this line: “Tender memories... no one can ever know.”  If anyone else was in the Lifestream with Cloud--or if it was just Cloud by himself--DD Cloud would never have felt the need to express himself. He would have stayed hidden, preferring for Cloud and the others to forever perceive him as the super cool SOLDIER instead of a “weak man” who couldn’t even save the girl he loved back on Mt. Nibel or fulfill his promise to her.

REASON #2 - Cloud draws strength from Tifa (the object of his shame/his fellow Nibelheim survivor/the person he’s been trying to win the attention of forever/the person he’s loved for 12 years) accepting him and providing moral support

This one is the most subtle as it’s mostly shown and the dialogue is not explicit, but the scene simply does not work without it. It is thanks to Tifa’s support that Cloud is brave enough to correctly remember the Nibelheim incident. 

After DD Cloud says his final line in the nexus, he looks away from Tifa. 

Can’t even make eye contact with her, even though he was able to back in the Mt. Nibel memory. He must think that now that all the cards are on the table, Tifa will reject him in some way. Maybe she will heap on the blame for failing to save her at Mt. Nibel, or be disgusted that he dared try to win her notice, but whatever it is, he expects some kind of rejection. But... that’s not what happens. Instead, Tifa implicitly absolves him of any guilt or shame by apologizing to him instead.

DD: If I could just get stronger... Then even Tifa would have to notice me...

T: So that was it... Sorry, Cloud. If I had only remembered more clearly what happened, I could have done something sooner...

...

So not only does Tifa fail to reject Cloud, but she also implies that Cloud is completely faultless, as she would have corrected the townspeople’s misconceptions about Cloud if she’d only known. Tifa plainly supports Cloud and does not blame him for Mt. Nibel.

Moreover, she continues to encourage Cloud after this moment. Soon after, Tifa exclaims:

T: Hang in there Cloud! Just a little longer! You've almost found the real you!

It’s only after Tifa’s words of encouragement that both Adult Cloud and DD Cloud merge into one another. This is a powerful moment; it shows that Adult Cloud hasn’t lost those deep, sealed away feelings, but has finally made peace with them. Cloud’s deep dark feelings are still a part of him but no longer hold him back; he no longer needs to misremember himself as a strong man for Tifa because Tifa accepts him as he is.

The game then explicitly shows Tifa and Cloud behaving with a togetherness that we haven’t seen the entire game--these two have finally overcome the distance between them and are able to tackle the world as a team. Cloud can finally be brave because he knows Tifa won’t leave his side.

And the game shows us this. First, Tifa, Adult Cloud, and DD Cloud all resolutely hold their fists up in unison (so ‘90s shounen anime, I love it):

Then they run into the Nibelheim memory together, side by side, literally in lockstep--look how every foot step is in sync:

This is different from previous memories, where one is always following the other or doing different things. What it shows us is that after Cloud comes clean about his shame and Tifa accepts him as he is, the two are closer together than ever before. Cloud feels brave enough to properly remember the Nibelheim incident when he has Tifa with him. 

And it’s telling that the very first moment Cloud tries to remember is...

...the memory of Tifa being injured. Not the memories of him stabbing Sephiroth (or being stabbed by him), not the memories of Zack being injured, not the memory of Cloud putting on his helmet to hide his shame. If he were still afraid of Tifa’s disappointment, Cloud would not choose to relive this as his very first memory. Yet Cloud picks a painful moment that includes Tifa, trusting that they can work through it as a team. I know I keep on saying it, but it’s the truth: Cloud is empowered to fully face his deepest shame and weakness because he knows that the real Tifa accepts him as he is and will stay by his side.

Part 3: So what does this mean for those “alternate fan theories?”

Phew! That was a lot. Let’s recheck our notes on what the Lifestream scene needs to accomplish:

Prove that Cloud Strife of Nibelheim existed before the Nibelheim incident

Rebuild Cloud’s sense of self by identifying and accepting his personal weakness

Establish the truth of the Nibelheim incident

Given what we just discussed, any substitute for Tifa would accomplish some, but not all of the above three points.

So for those fans who say...

>> “Cloud could have done it all by himself” - did... did you miss the giant floating confused Cloud?? He was trying and failing to figure it out by himself because he couldn’t bear to be honest, even for his own sake. What ultimately turns the tide is Cloud’s need to express his true feelings to Tifa, and how it outweighs his need to hide his weakness from himself; thus, without Tifa’s presence, Cloud cannot be honest with himself and cannot resolve his identity crisis. 

And PS, when Tifa says, “Cloud found himself on his own,” she’s referring to Cloud’s choice to reveal his weakness to her, and Cloud’s bravery at confronting the Nibelheim incident afterwards. She’s not saying “oh I didn’t need to be there at all and Cloud really just needed a couple extra minutes and I was basically scenery lol.” She’s complimenting Cloud for the radical honesty/personal strength that allowed him to finally express his true thoughts to her and thus to himself. 

Verdict: Cloud gets half points for #2 (accept personal weakness) and #3 (remember Nibelheim) because ultimately he’s the one who decides to reveal the truth of those moments. Cloud gets 0 points for #1 (prove his existence) because he still needed to double-check with someone who knew him as a child.

>> “any childhood friend could have helped Cloud” - sure, that childhood friend could help accomplish #1 (prove his existence), but as we previously discussed, Cloud is only motivated to be honest with himself when he realizes that Tifa doesn’t know the extent of his feelings for her. If he never that Tifa was clueless, then Cloud would have kept the Mt. Nibel memory locked away from himself and everyone else. 

Verdict: A Nibelheim rando would be able to accomplish #1 (prove his existence) but would fail to accomplish #2 (accept personal weakness) or #3 (remember Nibelheim)--Tifa is needed for DD Cloud to come clean, and Tifa’s unique role allows her to support Cloud while he works to remember the truth of the Nibelheim incident.

>> “Aerith (+Zack) could have taken care of it” - sure, Aerith (+Zack) could have shown Cloud the truth of #1 (prove his existence) and #3 (remember Nibelheim), because they both could observe the truth of those events.

But how could they help Cloud with #2 (accept personal weakness), when Cloud has been trying to hide his weakness all along and would probably feel even worse in comparison to these two shining beacons of excellence? And there’s some proof to this line of thinking; in CC, Cloud explicitly does not want to share his feelings for Tifa with Zack; and in OG, Cloud arguably tries to preserve the hero fantasy of being the Coolest SOLDIER Ever for Aerith. I can’t imagine Cloud wanting to share these “tender feelings that no one can ever know”/his love-induced weakness with anyone except for the object of those tender feelings. So #2 is still allllll Tifa, baby.

Verdict: Aerith (+Zack) could take care of #1 and #3, but they could never get Cloud to open up about #2--and even if they did, they were not the “victims” of “Cloud’s failure,” so their forgiveness/acceptance would mean nothing to Cloud and would not help him accept his own weakness.

Final thoughts:

>> Fun theory, but Cloti isn’t essential for it... the sequence still works even if Cloud’s tragic flaw is a raging inferiority complex.

There’s a difference between something technically working vs. what the game actually shows us. Yes, it could work if Cloud has a generic inferiority complex that has nothing to do with Tifa... but the game’s explanation of Cloud’s psyche (DD Cloud’s dialogue) spends >90% of its wordcount on Tifa. This argument essentially works if you throw out >90% of what the game was trying to tell you. Cloud’s entire inner world revolves around Tifa and stuffing your fingers in your ears and loudly saying lalalala does not change that.

>> But didn’t Cloud choose to hide his face because he wanted to hide his failure from everyone in town, not just Tifa, which would prove it was just a generic inferiority complex?

Sure, Cloud says:

C: I... never made it as a member of SOLDIER. I even left my hometown telling everyone I was going to join, but... I was so embarrassed. I didn't want to see anyone.

Off that line alone, one would think that he is ashamed to show his face to anyone in his hometown.

But the game shows us that Cloud specifically decided to hide when he saw Tifa.

Look how this baby is prepared to stroll into town with his Chocobo head free in that Nibelheim breeze. Not what you’d expect someone to do if they’re trying to hide from everyone, right?

But as soon as Cloud notices Tifa, he runs offscreen and puts his helmet back on while Zack can only shrug a “you do you” in reply.

It’s Tifa that Cloud couldn’t bear to disappoint. Not the rest of the town.

>> That final “resolution” moment after the Mt. Nibel incident is a little weak, isn’t it? There’s nothing explicitly saying that Tifa accepted Cloud and that’s why he’s able to shake off his shame and remember the Nibelheim incident properly.

It’s true that so much of this is implicit (the absence of Tifa berating Cloud, Tifa wishing she could have helped Cloud more back then), or shown-not-told (Tifa and Cloud raising their fists in unison, Tifa and Cloud running in unison). The OG script also jumps right to Tifa’s exclamation that the Mt. Nibel memory proves Cloud is a real person, not really lingering on Tifa accepting Cloud or anything. To be honest, the biggest reason why I even put together this theory is because 1 + 1 ≠ 4, but somehow that’s what happens in the Lifestream if we remove this shame/acceptance aspect. Also... how unsatisfying and uncharacteristic is it for Cloud to just feel ashamed that he failed to save Tifa, then for that shame to be resolved during the Nibelheim incident re-memory with a “oh it’s not that bad, at least you saved her during the Nibelheim incident so that mitigates it”? Or for it to not be resolved at all?

If Cloud was so deeply ashamed that he’d prefer to become a potato instead of face these memories, then I can’t imagine that facing the memories with zero support from Tifa would help him feel confident enough to tackle the Nibelheim re-memory. I highly suspect that this scene will be expanded upon in the Remake to explicitly highlight Tifa’s acceptance, resulting in Cloud’s readiness to expose his true memories to Tifa and himself.

[parachim]

Okay so I’m going to try out writing my reactions/feelings for everything I read in a month. Some of the stuff I read isn’t captured by Goodreads, and some of it I have opinions on that I want to get out but don’t want to post on GR for all the world to see A note that for this month I mostly worked from home post surgery. I do my of my book consumption via audiobook in the car so this is a relatively light month.

So here we go for April!

FICTION

The Body Without Organs @Natsinator (AO3) I first saw Space Odyssey 2001 in 8th grade and I had two takeaways: 1) I would like to do LSD 2) HAL 9000 is kinda hot Once a robotfucker, always a robotfucker I guess. Anyway, this is good! Solid exploration of the ship mind concept. Some quality homosexual subtext. Better writing than the Arthur C. Clarke novel (truly I think he is overrated - his best work is definitely Childhood’s End which is usually not discussed when people bring up his work). The Last Shadow Orson Scott Card OSC is unambiguously a bad person. I have never paid money for any of his work (I use the library) but I understand that even just reading his work is tacit support. It sucks that Ender’s Game was so damn good. Even Ender’s Shadow and I would say up to even Children of the Mind are pretty solid work. Everything after that goes further and further downhill. Last Shadow is supposedly (HOPEFULLY!) the final book. And oh boy does it suck! Freaky plot point that goes on and on about the butt and associated bodily functions of a little boy character. Why does OSC talk about little boy butts so much? What’s up with that?? Racist about Asian women. He really draws upon the harmful stereotype of Asian women being the perfect wives/mothers/homekeepers. They really have no meaningful agency beyond that. Building on the last point, OSC definitely sees it as the greatest good in life to have children. Thus women who don’t want children don’t exist in his books. There’s even a fucking hyper intelligent bird that talks about having children. Even if there wasn’t all that shit mentioned above - it was a badly assembled book. Plot threads that were set up in books prior never go anywhere. There are too many new tertiary characters we don’t care about because we hardly know anything about them. The main conflict of the book is solved quickly and easily with little pay off. Was there anything good in this book? Hiram is now and immortal holographic AI. That’s kind of a cool concept but it doesn’t go anywhere at all. But the best things is that I am finally free of this series. Finally fucking free!!

Bonus - I didn’t actually read Empire of the Ants by Bernard Werber but I ordered it via ILL for 98 to read. 98 gave me the summary and I read a bit of it out loud for them. I thought it was going to be a middle grades book like Redwall or Watership down but I don’t think this book’s intended target audience was children. I think it’s supposed to be more in the Michael Crichton sphere of ‘thriller pop science.’ Some of the stuff from the ants perspective is really clever (like how they view the mini golf course). The author definitely has some views that would be considered ecofascist.  There’s a weird spiritual? metaphysical? twist at the end that isn’t really pulled off.

NONFICTION

Futureface: A Family Mystery, an Epic Quest, and the Secret to Belonging Alex Wagner The investigation of the DNA testing kit industry is really good. She had a good exploration on how such companies advertise themselves (learn how global you are!), vs the companies original intent (help Mormons find and baptize their dead ancestors), vs how the general public really interprets the tests (latching onto one or two unique/special things). I like her discussion of the flaws of the industries (most of the sample pops are European bc those descendant populations are whos paying for this kits, the ethnicities reported are based off of contemporary boundaries which are not what you own ancestors would have necessarily known or understood). I think if she had put that section in the front half of the book and centered it it would have been a much more solid work. Her more traditional genealogical research is probably too personal in-the-weeds for a lot of people to care about. The stuff about the Burmese political climate was good though. Information Doesn't Want to Be Free: Laws for the Internet Age Cory Doctorow Suffers from ‘could have been an article’ disease. Way too fucking long for something that just hammers the same point over and over and over. His argument that current copyright law doesn’t really work in the modern world is something I largely agree with but unless you are a copyright scholar this book is just too long for what it’s accomplishing. Kill All Normies: Online Culture Wars from 4chan and Tumblr to Trump and the Alt-Right Angela Nagle This is bad. Don’t read this. I think I found it by searching for ‘anthropology’ in the library catalog. That’s pretty slim pickings so I got this without reading too much about it. It’s not an ethnography, that’s for sure. I thought it would be about how the internet can be a force of isolation and hyper insular communities that drive things like Qanon and deaths of despair. It's not about that. Nagle has a weird juxtaposition between the altright and tumblr culture, as if those things are somehow comparable. Jan 6ers really have nothing in common with 14 year olds using faeself pronouns but she gives them both the same treatment. There’s also a bizarre snub about video game journalism in here. Nothing is cited in this book. Apparently in the print addition there are a lot of typos. No idea how this got an audiobook produced. Arriving Today: From Factory to Front Door-Why Everything Has Changed About How and What We Buy Christopher Mims Supply chain step by step investigation. Would have loved for this book to come out like 2 or 3 years down the line to actually properly see what a post-covid supply chain looks like once things settle more. Good discussion on automation. Unmentionable: The Victorian Lady's Guide to Sex, Marriage, and Manners Therese Oneill Weird fucking book. I’ve never seen a history book written in second person before. I get that this is supposed to appeal to women who read Victorian romance, but it is off putting to almost anyone else in the tone. The book puts you in the place as if you were an upper class, white, Victorian Era woman in England. A very hard book to enjoy for me because of that for my own personal Gender reasons. I think the second person POV also stymies the book in that it limits the scope of who can be talked about and what life was like for women during the era who were not white, well to do, etc. Do we really need a deep drive on the women we already have the most information on? It does seem to be comprehensively researched. Nothing factual in the book seems incorrect as far as I know.

Index, A History of the: A Bookish Adventure from Medieval Manuscripts to the Digital Age Dennis Duncan Amazed that a book this specific got an audiobook made and a library system that I’m in bought a license to it. But, I supposed if anyone is going to be interested in this book it’s going to be someone with a library sciences degree. Even for being so hyper-specific, I think this book is good for what it is. Interesting investigation of how the way of organizing information has changed over time and how people perceive how information should be sorted. The author casually mentions that in the medieval era that it was way more common for people to read while moving their lips which is something that people are made fun of for doing now! Interesting that seems to be the default way of reading back then and it has since shifted towards silent reading. What factors played into that? More legible books? Capitalism driving focus on the individual vs community (if you read out loud it could be sharing with the people around you)? Would love to know when that shift happened temporally.

[fastcarsgovroom]

Don’t really know what to make of still it but here goes (the Lando Norris issue) Pt 3

This is about the Lando Norris and Max Fewtrell (and other involved streamers) issue so you don't need to read it if it's not in your best interest to. I don’t know if this thing is supposed to have blown over or anything, but I’m posting because heck this is my blog and I want to post about things I think are in line with my personal philosophy (and maybe in-group).    

The entire rant is in five parts:  

Part 1 is where I describe very basically the entire situation, essentially what I saw happening through posts on the tumblr, twitter, and reddit Lando Norris tags  

Part 2 is me trying to describe why some fans felt what they felt and reacted the way they did  

Part 3 is the videos and what was said of them and how I interpreted them  

Part 4 the ‘misinformation’ idk

Part 5 is like, a rant.

Part 3: What was actually said?

The clips of Lando and Max F saying things that were, for the lack of better words, questionable. Clip urls taken from one of the OPs who brought the issue to our attention (hope it’s all right I didn’t credit).

TW for talks about sex, sexism, and misogyny

If anything, listen to the clips for yourself and ignore the wall of text. Make up your own mind. I’m only writing what I’ve seen, and as a way to make sense of it. 

Under the cut

The relevant videos are (not in chronological order)

1. Star signs

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qqblm5bUU51y0rtc3.mp4

How I’d describe it: Max F brings up star signs (like, the zodiac) because his chat was discussing it. Lando reacts by saying that if a girl asks about star signs, ‘you get up and leave’, apparently in reference to his personal experience with a girl in conversation about star signs. Max F comments that the girl has ‘dodged a bullet’ based on how, for the lack of better words, passionate (’salty’) Lando’s reaction was. Lando retorts that Max F ‘wouldn’t have wanted to be with her,’ providing some information (where the girl was sitting), which causes Max F to recognize the girl and react in an amused but equally passionate way. The other streamer quoted “she crazy”, supposedly in relation to the girl.

How people have interpreted it: Others have interpreted is as being a sexual encounter, Lando being dismissive of a female-skewed topic of interest (star signs) and only listening to her in hopes of a sexual encounter (edit: the more ‘obvious’ “listening to women in hopes of a sexual encounter” is clip 4, added below. But I’ve also seen people claiming  ‘dipping’ (said by Max F) and ‘coughing’ (said by Lando) here to be references to sex, along with the ‘you wouldn’t have wanted to be with her’ as, of course, having sex, so I’ll leave this interpretation up. Again, I may be getting this wrong), that Lando and friends were making fun of the girl (’she crazy’, ‘you wouldn’t have wanted to be with her’, how Lando said the topic was ‘so boring’ at the mention of star signs, etc.) 

How I interpreted it: Personally, I don’t think we have enough context as to what really went down. I can see how you could come to the above interpretations, but I also, personally, find relating it necessarily to a sexual encounter a reach. Yeah, it could be the men hanging out and getting to know a young woman (girls) but just not jiving with her, or thinking that the woman’s interests were weird and boring. Personal conversations, essentially, that probably has no place on a public stream, but it comes across as being said carelessly and immaturely rather than with malice.  

2. ‘Stealing’, ‘don’t want to talk about it’, ‘that [descriptor]’ 

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qqbm90Esu01y0rtc3.mp4

How I’d describe it: This clip starts with a streamer (honestly I can only identify Max F and Lando, sorry) saying Max is bitter, to which Lando adds that it’s because Max F ‘did not receive love from a girl’. This seems to upset Max F, who retorts that if he should ‘tell a few stories’ about Lando, implied to be embarrassing ones. There was a lot of ‘yours’ and ‘mine’ (Lando and Max F) thrown around about the women. Max F brings up that Lando ‘tried to steal mine (Max F’s)’. Lando refutes this, and Max F looks more upset and says repeatedly that he does not want to ‘have this conversation’ with Lando. Lando continues on, referring to the girls as ‘the [descriptor]’, i.e. “the old one?”; “the top golf one?” and “I did not try to steal that one.” 

The other streamer appears to take issue with this, saying ‘that one?”, and Max F adds “can we stop talking about it like that?” and doubles down and tells Lando to stop the conversation. 

How people have interpreted it: This is the more egregious clip; people took offense at how the women were spoken about (’yours’, ‘mine’), the implications that they can be ‘stolen’, and how Lando referred to them as ‘the [descriptor]’. Some also interpreted Max F’s it as referring to a girl. This all leads into the perception that Lando and Max F were objectifying the women and talking about them in terms of conquests (presumably sexual). 

How I interpreted it: I think Lando and Max F were quite disrespectful in how they were talking about the women, more so Lando because he continued with the conversation (in a public stream) despite Max F telling him to stop. It does sound like ‘locker room banter’ about relationships, which is still, ultimately, misogynistic, immature, disrespectful, and inappropriate, especially in a public stream. 

What I don’t get is how ‘the/that [descriptor]’ was taken as intentional and malicious objectifying, and how the ‘it’ was referring to a woman and not the entire situation. 

3. ‘Cowboy’

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qqbq6nhmZR1y0rtc3.mp4

How I’d describe it: The clip starts in the middle off in-game banter, with Lando asking Max F if has any other digs at him, to which Max F replies that he does have ‘plenty off digs’ at Lando. Lando brings up ‘cowboy’ as an apparent dig, to which Max F retorts is ‘not a dig’, but was ‘brilliant’ and ‘very good’ for Lando. The Toy Story reference of ‘there’s a snake in my boot!’ is brought up, to which someone says ‘not the only snake, haha’ in a mock-jokey voice. 

How people have interpreted it: There’s probably more backstory to this in previous streams, as OP mentioned. Some have taken issue with, again, discussing personal situations involving a third party (OP has mentioned that the nickname ‘cowboy’ is in reference to a woman). Some also claimed that the nickname ‘cowboy’ is a sex position, so took offense to how it sounded like Lando and Max F nicknamed a woman they knew after a sex position, then openly talked about her in a public stream. Some said the nickname was from the woman’s social media handle, which had a cowboy emoji. 

How I interpreted it: This one is weird. I have no idea what the context is. I have no idea how people came to the conclusion that ‘cowboy’ was a sex position. Is the ‘snake’ in reference to male genitalia? I don’t know? I have no interpretation of this other than things without context always sound so weird. There’s entire twitter accounts about shows and podcasts lines taken out of context, which just sounds bizarre. 

4. ‘Reward’

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qqbfwzG9GC1wg3eue_720.mp4

How I’d describe it: I’m not sure if I can describe it without transcribing the whole thing or putting my own interpretation / narrative here. It’s a public stream, sure, but it sounds as coherent as a bit of disjointed conversation you’ve eavesdropped on (To me, anyway. I’m not being obtuse on purpose maybe I’m just dim).  

Clip starts with Lando and Max F sounding very amused with something, with Lando telling Max F about an encounter(?)/incident(?)with ‘cowboy’, referencing ‘rounds’ (round 2… round 6). There’s more banter, Max F saying he was ‘worried’ that Lando was talking about someone else, that he will whatever Lando is doing is ‘good for [him]’, and is ‘healthy’. 

Lando says it was “bit boring, really”, to which Max F says ‘oh, 100%, yeah waffle. Complete and utter waffle’ and “gotta do you what you gotta do, listen to her sometimes you know what I mean? Sacrifices do bring on great things.”

How people have interpreted it: Essentially, Lando is telling Max F about his hookups with ‘cowboy’ (the rounds being, well, rounds of hookups). Lando is saying that being with ‘cowboy’ is a bit boring, but Max F saying that Lando has to make sacrifices (his time? listening to boring conversation (’waffle’)?) in order to maintain said hookup partner. The takeaway was that Lando and Max F discussed sexual encounters with a woman (’cowboy’) on public stream, called her ‘boring’, and implied that she should only be listened to in context of getting a hookup is disrespectful. Many were disgusted. 

Some, perhaps not having watched the clip, attributed the ‘sacrifices for women’s attention / sexual gratification from women’ comment to Lando. Others are angry and disappointed that Lando did not speak up against the comment, which indicates that he too is complicit with the notion that women should only be listened to for sexual gratification. 

How I interpreted it: There’s a lot of innuendo here and ‘keywords’ that are attributed to sex and hookups (i.e. ‘rounds’ being hookups / rounds of sex; Max F’s implication that the many rounds (6) are ‘healthy’, a common description for sexual activity as being a healthy part of the human experience.) So, yes, I’ll believe that they’re most likely talking about their sex life. Why did I use so many words to come to that conclusion, and not just say ‘they are talking about their sex life’ out of the bag? Because that was my thought process so idk what to tell you other than what I did. Maybe it’ll come across as being apologetic and intentionally obtuse, who knows. 

Without the context, it’s not going to be very obvious.

So if I’m taking it as their conversation about sex, then the “sacrifices do bring on great things,” will very heavily imply that Lando has to have boring conversations with ‘cowboy’ for sex. Let’s be clear, this is a very disrespectful and demeaning take. It’s also unfortunately a very common one that’s thrown around everywhere in media, among immature men (young or old, lets be real). It’s also very normalized, so I get when people say they find it ‘normal’ or ‘typical’. This doesn’t excuse the comments or topic of conversation. 

On the other hand, I can also see a POV that Max F may have said things ironically or sarcastically, since it is a sentiment often used (women are nags) and both Lando and Max F are known to be sarcastic, dramatic, and dry at times. This is a reach to the other end of the ‘harmless banter’ spectrum, but without context, maybe it’s possible.

Still don’t know why ‘cowboy’ is necessarily a nickname derived from a sex position. 

Part 4

[hexcorazon]

i also understand what you are saying for sure and i thank you for being polite; im about to spit a lot of rebuttals but i mean it all politely and in the interest of fair discussion about nuanced topics lol

i think if a youtuber or creator is discussing the blanket concepts of petscop, getting into fan theories and the range of topics that can be pulled from petscop, then absolutely they should address the trans allegory because it IS so popular a headcanon/interpretation, and to not do so would be a disservice.

but on the other hand, i think if someone is just giving a run through of the plot and their PERSONAL interpretation doesnt include the trans allegory, due to them not being trans or simply getting something else out of the narrative, that doesnt mean theyre "invalidating" the trans allegory. thats kinda what im talking about in the original text; nexpo (whose video and some fan reactions is what prompted my post so thats what im talking about) is not dismissing trans experiences or invalidating a trans reading because his takeaway was about ai learning or whatever. to assume malicious intent against queer identities over something as vague and personal as a horror arg that wants the reader to come to their own conclusion is Weird. and it can be mean. like i said i was really only talking about nexpo here, idk about other creators that have ever discussed petscop other than purocynical whose video ive never seen and i think matpat did a game theory all about the real life true crime case the game initially referenced early on. idk if either of them talked about the trans allegory, how they treated it, or if theres other creators out there that do deserve criticism for how they handle the trans interpretation; but simply not coming to that conclusion isn't inherently against queer identities as a whole

and on a side note, i dont think you have to talk explicitly about csa bc that is also a personal inference about what happens in petscop; child abuse is of course the central theme. csa is a very specific type of child abuse that, like the trans allegory, is up to the individual consuming the media to interpret. themes of csa ARE harmful both to a creator and potentially the audience and you shouldnt force or critique someone for not wanting to go so dark with their interpretation.

petscop is at the end of the day, a fictional horror arg about a fake video game and i think its fine to not assume csa to protect ur own mental health or simply bc u aren't comfortable with discussing that. i lts also fine to not discuss a trans reading if thats not what they get or they dont personally see it. i also see how "martin forced paul/care to transition" is a fucked up thing, but to play devils advocate here, that is a completely real form of child abuse which often goes hand in hand with csa which is just as valid form of horror to interpret. u cant critique someone for exploring one aspect of horror bc it's uncomfortable and fucked up and then be upset that others dont discuss another aspect of horror that is also uncomfortable and fucked up. idk i think its a really nuanced topic that could have its own two hour long video essay made on it LOL

i really strongly dislike when arg fans specifically horror arg fans say that one interpretation is the only valid interpretation. like its perfectly acceptable to view petscop as a trans story but its not the ONLY VALID INTERPRETATION just bc its yours. stop being weird and mean to other fans bc they dont subscribe to your headcanons or interpretations full stop

[agent-cupcake]

Hey AC! I love your blog and was wondering if I could get your opinion on something. I've seen some people complaining that Ingrid and Hilda are treated by the fandom, with Ingrid stans saying that Hilda is also racist towards Almyrans (which, granted, she is) but doesn't get nearly as much hate about it as Ingrid does. But personally I feel like their attitudes and the way they react towards Dedue/Cyril are wildly different and Hilda generally seems less hateful/irrational about it. Thoughts?

This is... kind of a touchy topic... I like it though! It’s worth discussing, especially since I feel like it’s broke criticism to simply deflect blame onto a character in order to prop up another.  Full and obvious disclosure: I very much dislike Ingrid and very much love Hilda. That said, I don’t think it’s fair to compare them for the sake of which is worse. I fall into the trap of character criticism through comparison far too often and it's not really valid unless you can fully explore each character in their own right beforehand. Which is why, while writing this, I came to the conclusion that the ways these two characters are interpreted and the reason people view their racist tendencies differently has far more to do with the characters themselves than their actual beliefs.

From first impressions to subsequent playthroughs, this is pretty much how I feel about Ingrid: she brings up her hatred of the Duscur people and Dedue unprompted and uncontested several times at the very beginning of the game, putting it front and center to her character. This is important, it sets a foundational component for how I could come to view her. According to her introduction, she is honorable and respectful, a model lady knight trope. But, as mentioned, she's really racist. Literally standing around thinking about how awful it is that Dimitri would trust a man of Duscur because they are all bad people. Yikes. And nobody calls her on it. Again, this is very important for perception. People judge Sylvain for his bad behavior in a much more harsh way than they do Ingrid for her vitriolic loathing for another classmate who we have seen as nothing but respectful. It's weird. And then, despite the fact that her close friend Sylvain was able to reason out that it’s not possible for the Duscur people to be at fault for the Tragedy, despite the fact that the prince of the country she supposedly hopes to serve with unwavering respect and loyalty has made it clear that he does not believe that Dedue or Duscar are responsible for the Tragedy, and despite the fact that Dimitri, her close friend and the one most affected by the Tragedy (seriously, she lost a guy she might have married and he lost his best friend, mother, and watched his father be killed in front of his eyes) continuously insists that neither Dedue nor Duscur are at fault, she loudly and openly believes that the ensuing massacre of Duscur was deserved and Dedue is inherently culpable simply because of his race. Her motivations for this hatred feel even more cheap considering her dogged hero worship for Glenn was born out of the fact that she was promised to him, making the fact that she’d use his death as reason enough for the destruction of countless innocent lives even more unsympathetic in my eyes. I mean, seriously, she was around 13 and he was older than her, how close could they have truly been? Dimitri says they were in love, but she was a child. Abandoning my modern sensibilities about age of consent or whatever, kids at that age don't have the emotional or mental capability. Maybe this is just nitpicking, but I have a very hard time caring about that relationship. But, if her actual justification is because of what happened to Faerghus as a result of the Tragedy and feels duty-bound as a knight to find justice through the systematic destruction of the Duscur people, then it just circles back to confusion considering the future leader of said country doesn't hold Duscur or Dedue responsible. The importance of perception comes in because despite these paper thin excuses and her seemingly willfully ignorant hatred, she is never challenged on her racist beliefs. The reason she seems to change her mind about Dedue and consider that maybe excusing a genocide is wrong stems from guilt that Dedue continuously comes to her aid in battle at the potential cost of his own life. I can understand, to a certain extent, why she might feel the way she does. But, again, I have such a hard time with any justification when nobody that she's close to is even nearly as hateful as her, there is plenty of evidence (evidence that the people close to her have found!) to provide a very reasonable counterclaim to Duscur's guilt, and that none of that even matters when it would require her to openly contradict the prince of her country to make the claim that Dedue was in any way complicit in the Tragedy. Which would be fine if she wasn't established as the model Lady Knight archetype, which also brings us into Ingrid's moral high horse. Admittedly, I hate the Lady Knight trope. I have a significant bias against these types of characters. However, I really do think that this moral crusade is where she lost me completely. Without even a shred of empathy or self awareness, she lectures Sylvain about his shitty behavior even though their circumstances are at least somewhat similar and he has his reasons (bad ones, maybe, but ones worth understanding if she actually cares about him), she lectures Felix about not being interested in knightly endeavors (an aspect of his character that is born of the trauma she has appropriated), and she lectures Claude about behavior that is befitting of a man in his position. Not because she cares about the girls Sylvain is hurting, not because she thinks there are any grave stakes from Felix choosing to do his own thing, and not because she knows that Claude's behavior affects his ability to lead, but because she doesn't like these behaviors and thinks they should be fixed. Yet, at the same time, she believes Dedue deserved to lose his family, country, and culture based on his birth and nobody ever does anything to morally correct her, it is something she eventually is forced to acknowledge on her own. It's frustrating, infuriating even, that the game lets her get away with being so grossly hypocritical. And, all the while, she is being painted as sympathetic. Again, I have a hard time feeling sympathy for her about Glenn, and I certainty don't feel sympathetic towards her issues about marriage because there's never any actual tension there. Of course she won't be forced to marry, she's a Lady Knight. Beyond being unsympathetic, I also find her massively unlikable. Awful design, poor voice direction, food-loving-as-a-personality-trait, the fact that she's written as one of those stock "feminist" characters who hate makeup and girly things until it benefits them, and constantly butting in on other characters to give her opinion without taking any criticism herself are all aspects that I just personally dislike. Ultimately, Ingrid being racist is only a symptom of the many reasons her character is one of my least favorites. Most of these points can be countered by someone who doesn't take issue with the things that annoy me and to point out that Ingrid DOES get over her racist beliefs. It's not fair to say that she doesn't change but, for me, the damage was already done by the time she became tolerable so I still have a hard time appreciating her. My assumption would be that there are a lot of other people who feel similarly to me regarding their dislike of Ingrid so they focus on one easy character flaw, her being racist at the beginning of the game, as a reason to validate their dislike of her overall.

On the other hand, Hilda's racism isn't a main trait of her character. It's related to her overarching character flaws, but she doesn't bring it up unprompted and can actually be pretty much missed without the Cyrill supports. Like you said, Hilda does seem less hateful and irrational, it doesn't take willful malice and an active rejection of reason for Hilda to dislike the Almyrans, they pose a genuine and provable threat to her family and territory, seemingly senselessly testing the borders and throwing away lives for the sake of conquest. To be clear, her "you're not like those OTHER Almyrans" schtick is legitimately nasty. Her behavior is gross and condescending and it really underscores the fact that Hilda is ignorant, lazy, inconsiderate, and incredibly comfortable in her privilege. She accepts what she's been told at face value because she's too lazy to look into it further. Cyrill does tell her she's stupid to think that way, though. Which is satisfying because Hilda in those supports is insufferable, it really highlights the worst aspects of her character, dismissive, manipulative, and very selfish. However, for me, she's also very likeable. I'm not interested in going over my opinions on her like I did with Ingrid as I don’t feel it’s as important to my point but a few reasons I really like her is because I think Hilda has a fantastic design, cute supports, amazing voice work, and is secretly sweet in a way that absolutely tickles my fancy. I am sure many people do not agree with me, which is fine. Additionally, just as Ingrid grows out of her racist beliefs, so does Hilda. They both end the game as more tolerant and caring people. Still, for the same reason a person could argue that Ingrid is actually great and I'm being unfair, they could argue that Hilda is terrible and I'm too biased. That's fair and true..... but I think the fact that Hilda is more generally appealing in conjunction with the less obvious nature of her racist attitude makes people less likely to dismiss her as a racist in the same way they do Ingrid. Unless they dislike Hilda, in which case, it’s all fair game.

Anyyyways, a main takeaway from this is that I highly doubt people are truly arguing on the individual basis of who's more racist, but that they're engaging in the age old waifu war. As with many characters in this game, it's easier to argue moral superiority when you can't quite articulate what you like or don't like about a character. Or, even worse, when you're arguing opinion. Even now, as is clear by reading this, I am arguing my opinion of why I don't like Ingrid. Not because she's racist, but because of the character traits and writing choices that make her unlikable to me. I like Hilda because, flaws and all, I find her to be compelling and enjoyable. From the people that I know, at least, that is basically how the Ingrid stans v Hilda racism argument is structured, even if they dress it up in different language.

By the by Hilda never talks about how the Almyrans deserve to be wiped out. I think that probably sours a lot of people's opinions of Ingrid no matter what happened afterward but that’s fine we can just pretend that didn’t happen

[cogentranting]

Some Thoughts on Kevin, Sophie, Symbols, and the Mysterious  Fiancée  

Episode 4x12 was a really interesting addition to the Kevin/Sophie story because I think there are multiple ways to interpret it, and I think how you interpret it depends on which flashback and corresponding symbol you take to be most important. 

In the present day, you have Kevin going to Sophie’s mom’s funeral. But the greater significance of this is left mostly ambiguous. Is this an episode about a rekindling romance? About finding closure? Something else? But then you also have three flashbacks: Kevin’s childhood looking for the mobile, Kevin and Sophie the night Jack died, and Kevin and Sophie visiting town for Rebecca’s birthday. 

Young Kevin and the Sheep Mobile  This plot line is seemingly the least connected. It’s all about a very young Kevin not being able to sheep without his sheep mobile, while the other three focus on the deaths of parents and on Kevin and Sophie’s relationship.  The key point of connection seems to be Jack’s line to Kevin at the end of arc, about how the sheep are gone, but he can sleep with the stuffed tiger because “just because you loved something once doesn’t mean you can’t love something new”.  Applied to the main story line, it seems that Sophie is sheep mobile, and the message is that even though Kevin loved her and that was real and important, he can’t have her back and he has to find someone new to love. If you interpret the episode by this flashback and symbol, it’s about how Kevin needs to move on and find a new love, saying that him falling for someone new does not diminish what he felt for Sophie. 

Teen Kevin and Good Will Hunting This one, which shows Kevin and Sophie during the night leading up to Jack’s death (what Kevin calls the last night of his childhood) has the clear connection to the present story by being related to the death of his father, just as the present is about the death of Sophie’s mother. But all of it takes place before Kevin learns about Jack’s death. So even though that forms the point of connection, and it draws the parallel between them helping each other through those events, that’s not really what it’s about. It’s more about Good Will Hunting, which is teased early in the episode in the present and then ambiguously referenced several times throughout, before reaching a resolution back in the present.  In this symbol, Kevin and Sophie watched Good Will Hunting together but left before the end of the movie, and they both agreed to never watch the ending, instead making it a game between them to come with different endings of their own because the real ending could never be better than what they come up with. So the game demonstrates their ongoing connection and their history together. But in the end of the episode they watch the ending together and agree that the actual ending is better than anything they could have come up with.  So it could be that the ending of the movie symbolizes that, even though they both never really wanted to close the door on this picture of their relationship, when they do they discover something even better- moving on from each other could open them up to an ending better than what they could have imagined with each other.  OR it might not be that straightforward of a symbol. Because the movie is also linked to as Kevin put it, the last day of his childhood, and they watch the ending in the place where he found out that Jack died. He uses that to talk to Sophie about her going back to the coffee shop where she learned about her mom. So it could be that watching the ending of the movie, represents not trying to stay locked in the past before the bad things happened, but being willing to take the scary step of healing and moving forward. If that is more of the interpretation, then it could be about Kevin and Sophie moving on from each other, or it could be about letting go of the old stages of who they were together in order to embrace a new ending together, different from the ones they imagined for so long, but maybe better. 

Young Adult Kevin and the Ring  Then there’s the story of Kevin asking Claire for her mother’s ring to give to Sophie.  There are two main takeaways in this story. One is Claire’s relationship to Kevin. The point they emphasized was that Claire always believed in Kevin, always believed he’d make it, always told him to never settle. The second is the story of the ring, that Claire’s father bought it for her mother, but her mother refused to take it until he got back from the war, telling him to use it as a reason to come back to her, a symbol of hope. It’s a story about waiting. And a story about hope. But Claire won’t give Kevin the ring because the relationship is new and they’re young: they haven’t had to wait for each other, they haven’t had to persevere or hold on to hope. They haven’t been tested. Reflecting back from the present, Kevin believes that Claire wouldn’t give him the ring because she knew he’d mess things up with Sophie. And maybe she did, but overall that wasn’t the impression we were given of Claire’s relationship with Kevin. It was about her telling him to keep on going because one day he’d get there, and one day he’d have the thing he was aiming. It was about Claire believing in Kevin. So it would seem strange to end that arc on a note of “but she knew he’d mess up this thing and not be able to repair it”.  So at the end of the flashback, Kevin does not get the ring, and at the end of the present story line Kevin and Sophie go their separate ways (as they should, her cheating on/leaving her fiance with him because of the way grief heightened her emotions would not have been good, no matter who you want to be together, and Kevin even warned her off any action with him by pointing out the effect grief can have on people). So Sophie is still with her fiance and Kevin slept with Madison.  But, also we ended Sophie’s scenes with her staring at her grandmother’s ring. The ring she’s always wanted and never got. By my estimation, her fiance can’t be the one to give her the ring as resolution to that story. There’s a couple reasons for this. First, he’s not a character. He’s never even really had any lines. I can’t think of this name. If he were to give Sophie the ring, we would never see that happen. It would have to happen off screen and maybe be communicated to Kevin at some point after the fact. Second, a big point is made about how he didn’t really know Claire. And the emphasis with the ring was that it was Claire’s to give to someone for Sophie. So her intentions before dying could be honored in giving the ring, but she didn’t know the fiance and so he can’t be in keeping with Claire’s intentions and he can’t fully appreciate the import of the ring. Third, by all accounts that we’ve seen, Sophie and her fiance have never had to wait for each other in any real sense. They can’t live out what the ring represents. So if the fiance can’t give the ring to Sophie in a meaningful way, and this really is the end for Kevin and Sophie, then the ring was introduced and ends within the same episode with the point just being that this thing that meant so much to Sophie, she never gets. Which is not a satisfying conclusion, especially given that, Sophie didn’t do anything wrong to mess up her relationship with Kevin.  But, the ring is about waiting and hope. So if the ring is meant to symbolize two people willing to wait for each other and have hope that they’ll find a way to be together again, then that would fit really well with a story line about Kevin and Sophie finding their way back together again. Sophie looking at the ring again would be a sign to the audience, that her story is not over. It would become about Kevin and Sophie waiting for many years in order for Kevin to finally be the person that she needs him to be. And Kevin even addresses that idea when he talks to Claire’s grave– that he feels like he’s finally ready to be with Sophie, he just missed his chance. It would contrast with the young impatient Kevin who married Sophie on an impulse. It would contrast with the version of Kevin he described to Madison, who’s never broken up with because he always cuts and runs first. And in making these contrasts would emphasize Kevin’s growth as he comes to deserve the ring. And it would fit with the overall theme of Claire’s relationship to Kevin– she believed that he would make it eventually, even if she thought he might mess up along the way, and she didn’t want him to settle, she just wanted him to wait.  So the way I see it, the ring represents that all Kevin and Sophie need is a little bit of time and they will find their way back together. 

The Other Love Interests If you lean more toward one of the first two symbols and towards an interpretation that this episode is about Kevin and Sophie finding closure and moving on to better endings and new loves, then that leaves the question: who is Kevin’s fiancee?  Zoe seems pretty clearly out of the running, because she doesn’t want children (and I don’t think they should change that) and because Kevin’s child in the flashforward was not mixed race. Cassidy is still a possibility, but her story to this point has been directed toward her fixing her relationship with her husband, not finding new love. And some cast indications seem to mean that she’s not returning. Lizzy is married, made a really poor first impression, and the actress says that the character “won’t return anytime soon”.  Of the characters we’ve already met, that leaves Madison, who of course is the most prominent at the moment because the episode ends with her and Kevin sleeping together. Does this action indicate that they are the new main pairing? I’m not convinced.  For one thing, up until this point Madison’s primary role has always been comic relief. Though you’re meant to like her and at times sympathize with her highs and lows, and she has had some serious moments, she is still generally portrayed as a somewhat ridiculous character, a little clueless, a little over the top. Even some of her serious moments (like the points where she and Kate form a true connection) to some degree ask you to laugh at Madison (though not all do, as was pointed out to me in regards to a story line I forgot). This seems unlikely to be the character they choose as Kevin’s (presumably) endgame romance (For those of you thinking ‘well Toby is a comic character and Kate married him– in their comedic relief moments, you’re asked to laugh with Toby, you’re asked to laugh at Madison). It wouldn’t be impossible for them to shift Madison into being a character you could take more seriously, but I would expect that to come before pushing her and Kevin together, and no such lead up happened. Even if they were to do it now, there are only six episodes left in the season (and we’re supposed to have our fiancee answer by then), which isn’t a lot of time left to build up Madison’s character as well as her relationship with Kevin to the point where there could be a proposal (unless we’re looking at more of a… shotgun wedding).  Then there’s the actual nature of Kevin and Madison’s interaction in 4x12. We do see Kevin and Madison share a nice moment of relating to and encouraging one another. But the actual progression of that into more than just a friendly interaction between a man and his sister’s friend into a hookup is completely skipped over. If this is the beginning of the next big romance, they would seem like a crucial progression.  And then there’s Kevin’s reaction to the hookup. When he talks to Randall he talks about “being in the middle of a whole thing” and it being “a hell of a week” and when they get Kate on the call they end up chanting “Sad three” and all deciding to get away for a while and go to the cabin. Which overall doesn’t indicate a very positive reaction to what happened with Madison, especially given that it’s paralleled with Randall’s anxiety pushing him toward a panic attack, and Kate’s marriage falling apart.  We can also apply Kevin’s words to Sophie to this situation. He warns her that she may have latched onto him at the funeral because grief makes you grab on to whatever’s near. Kevin at the end of the episode is grieving, partly for Claire who was important to him, and partly for his lost relationship with Sophie, which he feels is currently hopeless.  So it seems, more than him and Madison forming a meaningful connection over their mostly innocuous break-ups conversation, that he was in pain and grabbed on to the first thing that was near. 

Conclusion 4x12 was meant to leave Kevin’s future ambiguous, to send mixed signals and keep you guessing. However, I’m inclined to think that it did more to open doors with Sophie than to close them. I don’t see them leaving that character behind yet, especially because they just introduced Claire and the ring as a new aspect of it, and because the cheating and the divorce have still not been explored, which is one of the biggest holes left in the This Is Us timeline.  I think that while they threw out some stories about closure and moving on, the most prominent symbol in the episode was the ring, and that was left unresolved, pointing more toward a reunion for Kevin and Sophie than away from it.  What’s more, they’ve promised answers about who the fiancee is by the end of the season (or the very beginning of next season, but I think it was this season). They’re rapidly running out of time. The show has dedicated a lot of time to the Kevin/Sophie relationship. They dedicated a lot of time to the Kevin/Zoe relationship. Even Kevin/Cassidy and Kevin/Sloane got a fair amount of development. If Madison (or a new character) is Kevin’s fiancee then it seems strange to have Kevin end up married to and having a kid with someone whose relationship with him got significantly less development than any other relationship of his has gotten. The only way I see that making sense is if the relationship itself is short lived and is significant mainly for giving Kevin his son. That’s possible but a large part of Kevin’s motivations have been about him wanting to be in love and have a wife, so I don’t see them teasing a fiancee for half a season and then having him end up single. Not because a kid can’t be a satisfying family life on its own, but because for four seasons we’ve been shown that Kevin wants a wife.  I could see the story going a number of ways, but if I had to guess, I’d say that 4x12 is the beginning of Sophie and Kevin getting back together. 

[lunias-takes-on-homestuck]

My Classpects Through the Years

I started getting into Homestuck in late 2012, about a year after [S] Cascade dropped, and like most of y’all I got pretty interested in the system of Classes and Aspects.

...Okay, I got obsessed with it. Who wouldn’t? A highly-flexible system of essentially taking an aspect of reality and interpreting it through the lens of a key verb or idea, creating unique and self-determined power sets limited only by your own imagination? That’s wild. And when I say I got into it, I mean I really got into it. I dove deep into Homestuck’s lore, reading up on popular and somewhat fringe theories about what each Aspect related to, how the Classes utilized them, what the potential Active/Passive pairings were, and how certain Aspects seemed to oppose each other. I even went so far as to contribute to a theory regarding the future of Tavros Nitram, which... didn’t exactly pan out as expected... but it was a ton of fun! And of course, while I was certainly interested in what this all meant for our cast of characters, I was also interested in how it could be interpreted and/or applied to real people.

People are, of course, far more complicated than a simple personality test could possibly explain, but I still got a lot of entertainment out of trying to pin down the classpects of characters or people I knew irl. Which naturally included me. Looking back on it, I think it’s very interesting to see the progression in ideas that led up to my more recent musings, so I figured it would be cool to dive into that and share my past and current classpects here!

Credits:

All images are pulled from the Homestuck Classpect Chart Updated posted by JosiahR94 on DeviantArt.

Artists: Zynchilada (compiled, partially drawn) and Owyn (updated at original resolution). Both blogs listed on the artwork have since been deactivated.

2012-2013 - Knight of Breath

This one is the byproduct of some test manipulation on my part - the fan test I was using was based on MBTI and Jungian archetypes, and honestly I’ve never found them to remain accurate for longer than a couple months at a time. I’ve wound my way around four different MBTI results over the years so I’m not inclined to use them as the basis for much, especially since the original test included fan-created classes and aspects that I really didn’t understand or jive with. But even once I narrowed it down to strictly canonical classes and aspects, I still wound up going with the 3rd-most accurate one. At the time I saw the Knight as the Active Exploiter class, the type to jump into action and wield their aspect as a weapon. I really related the idea of a detached loner who was fiercely protective of their friends, and John had shown off very, very recently (for me, anyway) just how powerful wind could be. The powers were sick, the outfit was neat, and it was absolutely wrong in nearly every way. Nearly. But we’ll get to that.

2013-2015 - Seer of Doom

You’re probably a little familiar with this one if you’ve been keeping up with Homestuck theorists lately, as there are two prolific content creators I know of who identify as Seers of Doom. For some time, I did too! The change was largely brought about because I thought my initial Knight of Breath result hadn’t been accurate enough, and also because I wanted to try my hand at classpecting myself without the aid of tests. At the time I was really feeling the Doom aspect and I saw myself as a guide (or maybe a teacher?) so it felt like it fit. There was just one sliiiight problem - I was entirely focused on how the Doom aspect related to the problems I was having in my life, rather than how I viewed the world around me and interacted with it. I still felt like I was sort of onto something with Doom, but it took some major life events to give me the nudge I needed to see things a little more clearly...

2015-2020 - Sylph of Life

For me, 2015 felt like the year I was finally coming out of my funk and figuring my shit out. It’s the year I started taking college courses (well, a college course), getting into meetups, making new friends, and reinventing myself. At some point I decided that the issue with my initial Doom analysis was that I was overly focused on the challenges I had instead of how I actually dealt with them, and my new aggressively-optimistic outlook would simply not mesh with Doom. Not one bit. I also felt that my class didn’t quite fit, and Sylph was sitting right there with their magick-y healing and creation powerset -- the ultimate support, and the type of person who makes their own way through life by simply refusing to accept they could be stopped or put down by anything. By the time the Extended Zodiac Quiz came out in 2017 and confirmed I was Lifebound, I had already proven to be on top of my game in college in a creative field. I joined our LGBT+ club and started somewhat aggressively railing against overly-restrictive labels and social constructs in Contemporary English to the point that I was exceeding the page limit on our essay assignments on a regular basis and still felt I wasn’t saying everything I wanted to say. Sylph of Life just clicked for me in a way the Knight of Breath and Seer of Doom never had, so I figured I’d nailed it.

Then, earlier this year, I found out I was actually a girl.

2020-Present - Knight of Life... or maybe Heart???

Imagine for a minute that you’re at a theater watching some movie through the perspective of the protagonist. You think you’ve got the plot all figured out, you’re guessing every story beat, and then in the last 5 minutes the big twist reveals the protagonist has unwittingly been an unreliable narrator for the last two hours. Literally everything you thought you understood has been flipped on its head, and it’s still good but it’s all very confusing. You leave the theater wondering what you just watched, and as you turn on your car you suddenly realize there were subtle hints foreshadowing the twist for over half the film. With every passing second the pieces start coming together, and you just know that watching it again would leave you going “How the hell did I miss that?!”

That’s about the best way I can explain what I’ve been experiencing for the past four-ish months. All the puzzle pieces I had put together were thrown totally out of whack and I’m finding every day that there are aspects of myself and my personality that I never knew where there. Discovering myself is hard work, but it’s a wonderful feeling, and it’s no wonder that on the heels of this I’m seriously vibing with the aspect relating to Personal Identity. That said, I still find myself parsing labels and identity through the lens of Life - words which are too restrictive to properly convey who I am, and an experience that can’t be explained or constrained by the stereotypical narrative people tend to have about people who are bisexual, polyamorous, transgender, and at once more complicated than those words can really describe. When I take the Extended Zodiac Quiz I find that I’m still Lifebound, but changing even a single question by a single step leaves me Heartbound instead, and I think that dichotomy really mirrors where I feel I’m at as a person.

Class-wise, I feel drawn to both Sylph and Knight to a degree, but in the years since I first chose the Knight of Breath classpect I have come to understand the class as a Passive Server - one who gives for the benefit of others - and that speaks to me. The wonderful Mythological Class Quiz by @homestuckexamination has only confirmed my suspicions about that. I have yet to decide between Knight of Life and Knight of Heart, but they’re both very interesting classpects imo, and either way I’m sure I’ll be spending far too much of my free time developing powers and things for them :P

Takeaway

Whew, that’s a lot of words! But what exactly does it all mean? Well... if you ask me, Classpecting is sort of a process. I’m sure that, years down the line, I’ll probably say I had it all wrong and I’m actually some other combination of class and aspect, and I’ll reminisce about the days when I was so obviously misreading myself. But that’s kind of the fun of it, isn’t it? It’s just another form of personality quiz, albeit one where you get sick powers and a nifty set of pajamas at the end. And for all the good that introspection can do to help you understand yourself a little better, you better believe I’m going to be spending the next hour or two debating whether passing out heals and buffs while tanking everything would be more cool than body-surfing and turning enemies into clones à la Agent Smith in The Matrix: Reloaded.

[queenofnohr]

Ok so as a brief departure from OC ramblings, tonight I’m gonna talk about Sekiro’s ending(s) and why they were........... not bad, but a little bit of a letdown for me personally? Spoilers abound for anyone who cares about that.

If any of y’all’s interest was piqued at my Genichiro DLC of dreams this might be a good thing to read to see where I’m coming from before I get into that (I also felt the need to make this before I could post anything about what I had planned for the DLC of Dreams).

ANYWAY. (spoiler tag because I talked too much as per usual)

It’s been a couple months so I finally feel, I guess, good about talking about Sekiro’s ending and Genichiro’s role re:the ending since it seemed, from a cursory glance, to be a bit of a Thing back when the game first came out.

For those unaware, the debate went more or less “I’m disappointed because I wanted the final showdown with Genichiro to be better” vs. “Genichiro was supposed to be easy because it’s supposed to cement that he’s a punk-ass bitch who needs gramps to help out”

And...... obviously I’m biased, but I think there’s room for interpretation on how Genichiro is supposed to be read throughout the narrative (certainly, part of the ENTIRE NARRATIVE is “the people and establishments you thought were the biggest and baddest (aka Ashina as a whole) are actually big fish in a small pond and currently wayyyyyyy out of their depth”) but I’m not actually here to debate whether he’s supposed to be “strong” or not.

What I’m saying is, as the final fight stands, he isn’t desperate enough. I understand why they essentially didn’t change his boss fight - Isshin is the true final boss and they wanted this cinematic seamless flow between Genichiro and Isshin, and if Genichiro was too hard or too different, it would’ve been a pain in the ass, even for a FromSoft game. Still, Genichiro’s unchanged moveset is a huge disappointment on two fronts:

1. He has a reused moveset in a game where 2 other major bosses have largely reused movesets (Guardian Ape and Corrupted Monk) with some added gimmicks thrown in (I’ll give the True Monk’s third form a pass since that did legitimately change it up, although the other two phases are more or less the same (no, her shadow clone intermission does not count))

2. Even if the takeaway you get from him isn’t that he’s supposed to be “powerful,” if anything, the game consistently frames him as desperate. The fact that he can’t use his lightning, his Mortal Blade strikes are just some of his regular moves with added range that don’t even do anything extra, and he doesn’t even pull out his bow even though that’s his defining feature and definitely one of the trickier aspects of his moveset (not to mention the thing he is in-game known for - c’mon people, it’s even in his name) just..... does the exact opposite of giving him that feeling of desperation. He’s an easy fight, he doesn’t even pull out all the stops, and then he hands it off to gramps after what feels like nothing more than a light tussle. For FromSoft, whom I trust with my life with storytelling through gameplay, it feels like a ball dropped even if Isshin is there afterward.

As an aside, I’ll also add in that I really liked how Bloodborne handled its multiple endings. That is, how each ending was punctuated by a different final boss depending on your decisions/what ending you got. Even though the Moon Presence is definitely easier than German, I feel it’s still a battle that leaves a satisfying impact to lead into the true/secret/at the very least hardest ending to get.

In Sekiro, a lot of things are mirrored between each other. We have all the forms of immortality that might stem from the same thing, but are fundamentally different in their mechanics (and all bad in their own ways), we have different types of waters with corrupting influence (Rejuvenating Waters, Fountainhead waters), and even our main characters reflect each other (Okami, Emma, and Genichiro were all orphaned sometime during or very soon after the rebellion, adopted by some of the greats, and have a kind of legacy to uphold).

And, on the last note, the game goes out of its way to have Genichiro mirror Okami, right down to him receiving a Mortal Blade of his own. He also punctuates each phase of the game; The Iconic Sekiro scene is the showdown with him among the silvergrass, his fight atop Ashina castle is more or less when you learn How To Play The Game if you’d simply been geetting by however (like I did lol), and all the details leading up to the end - the cutscene right after you beat him, eavesdropping on Isshin and Emma, the Black Mortal Blade, the time of day slowly changing with the anticipation building for that final showdown under the moonlight among the silvergrass once more..... - make for what at least Should Have Been another punctuation, even if he isn’t necessarily the final boss. But for all they talk of him shedding his humanity, for all Isshin and Emma show both concern and (at least in Isshin’s case) almost admiration/respect (we’ll go into their complicated relationship another day) for his resolve to throw everything away for Ashina, the gameplay takes all of it and throws it out with his mediocre showing. It doesn’t even feel like a bait-and-switch of which good ones have some foreshadowing, some bent to know what will ultimately happen even if it angles hard in another direction (so, when it happens you’re stuck mouth agape holding your head in your hands just like “OF COURSE!!!! I SHOULDVE SEEN IT COMING!!!!), but this..... doesn’t do that. All the information we get goes in one direction - the only thing that’s a giveaway is his association with Ashina itself - but even then, we see Ashina grow desperate, we see Nightjar take the Rejuvenating Waters (and the awful, awful descriptions of their “custom” Bite Downs), we see the Ashina Elite below Isshin’s room apologize to him and take it as well, we see the last stand of Ashina ashigaru, we see soldiers who once stood against us begging us to save their fellows - and we see none of that from Genichiro.

The thing is, I don’t think he needs to be difficult to be able to have impact.

Before getting into his fixes, I’ll note what I did like because, under certain circumstances, I do enjoy the ending in its most vanilla form.

That is, Genichiro having a lackluster fight, admitting his own shortcoming, and taking off his own head to bring back gramps to both metaphorically and literally bring Ashina back from the dead is actually.......... really, really good and - dare I say - Cinematic Poetry........ but only in regards to the Purification Ending. Because he and Okami remain mirrored - Okami refuses to allow the cycles that have persisted to continue and has it end with him as he sacrifices himself to save Kuro. The reason the ending feels too easy aside from Genichiro’s actual gameplay mechanics is because there’s all his talk of shedding humanity, all the talk of Shura...... But him admitting his own shortcomings and passing the torch to someone else is extremely....... human? It’s not that it’s not desperate, necessarily, but it’s so..... controlled. Those are not the actions of a man who downed stuff that would potentially drive him mad and consume him with rage and make him unable to tell friend from foe for the sake of saving the very same people that would be put at risk from his potential madness. But I like it in the context of the Purification ending because Okami himself becomes more human in sacrificing himself, and so it fits that Genichiro would wrangle his humanity in some small way and behead himself, just as Okami does, to save what he loves most.

Even so, I still think that the fight that in the fight that comes beforehand he should at least pull out all the stops, even if it means cutting down his health and/or posture bar to make the fight less obnoxious. (Although the other option is literally just........ don’t make the player fight Genichiro again if they beat him. Just have Isshin there already.)

As for other endings......... I’ll detail the Dragon’s Homecoming Ending in my DLC of dreams post because that, at least, is highly dependent on that lore. But for the Severance ending? That end is all about cycles being repeated, falling prey to what you commit yourself to even if you have to “shed your humanity” for it. Kuro is the only thing it seems like Okami truly cares about, and yet because he is duty bound to follow his lord’s orders no matter what, he kills a part of himself along with Kuro when he performs the Severance. Kuro represents his humanity - their bond is the only way Okami does have different endings to pursue should he indulge that humanity. And so, for Genichiro....... why not have him commit himself fully to becoming a monster? He doesn’t necessarily have to be strong/difficult, but seeing that transformation is key. In fact, give him 5 health bars and make the last three easy as sin. Have him buckle down and commit himself to this even though some part of him knows it won’t work, because he doesn’t know any other way to be. Have him die pitifully, in disgrace, as the player takes out his third health bar, and before he can land a hit in, his fourth, and before he can even get up, take his fifth. Have him desperately becoming more monstrous as his body won’t allow him to die, to no real difference. Land the final blow with the mortal blade while he’s writhing on the ground, willing himself to get up. If he was supposed to be pitiful, if his decision to throw everything away was supposed to be pathetic, with a miserable showing, then make him pitiful. Don’t make him easy. Make him the sorry sight he’s supposed to be.

[rennyji]

July 15th Morning Tweets...

July 15th Morning Tweets...

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Martina McBride - “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing” - the song was made more beautiful by this woman’s voice…I feel women sound less and less like that, and also tend to look less womanly in appearance and more like girls…I mean women have a particular build (…can you say build with women?! I don’t mean broad shoulders like me or other guys and I’m not exactly referring to the body like a coke bottle from rap songs…)…there’s also something to their faces…can’t put my finger on it, but maybe women look like Wonder Woman or Gal Gadot acting as Wonder Woman, where as present day women looking like girls seem…playful?! in appearance…is that actually a thing or style?

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From the @TouchofModern app, you can always find innovative interesting stuff at discount prices. On a very dull level, compared to buying a fitness item of sorts, I found these really good quality shirts…what do I mean by quality? The material is good, the design is good, feels good, I think I’m thinking texture?!-it’s also good. The t-shirt brand I’m talking about are from a London/Spain based brand called “Felix Hardy.” Polo Ralph Lauren sells jeans that allow ur legs to bend and move around- I mean you get what you pay for, but I think Felix Hardy sells better shirts…

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so with all the philosophy Ive been sharing, I came across Matthew 16. A part of it goes, "The Yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees" . It states, -

-5 When they went across the lake, the disciples forgot to take bread. 6 “Be careful,” Jesus said to them. “Be on your guard against the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.” 7 They discussed this among themselves and said, “It is because we didn’t bring any bread.”-

-8 Aware of their discussion, Jesus asked, “You of little faith, why are you talking among yourselves about having no bread? 9 Do you still not understand?-

- so yeast of the pharisees and sauducees...like 5 loaves miraculously feeding 5000 men or yeast expanding, an idea in our heads can spiral or take life for better or worse. be mindful of wrong ideas and the spiral they can take you. -

-be mindful of what the known and hidden orchestrators put out...you may only be aware of one group...be mindful, or “Be on your guard against the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.”

-In that BiblicalPassage, Christ says, "When they wentAcross the lake, the disciples forgot 2 take bread. “Be careful,” Jesus said 2them. “Be on ur guard againstTheYeast ofPharisees &Sadducees.” 7 They discussed this amongThemselves &said, “It is b/c we didn’t bring any bread.”-

- This is Christ saying, "take in His words and what religions offer, with an open mind, a kind heart, and INSIGHT-i.e. learn to interpret things and not just take things literally. -

-whether in life, reading, or understanding a person and their actions, look at context i.e. what came before, happening now, and the potential for future events...-

- it goes back to what I think I said yesterday about parables being like computer zip files. The way to unzip them is with insight and life experience. To repeat my specific words from yesterday: -

-Here’s a computer metaphor: parables are like computer zip files or compressed files. A zip file is a file that can contain multiple files and folders in the convenience of one smaller file.-

-You use a program to unzip that one file to reveal the multiple files and folders. The parables are zip files and you can gain a myriad of advice, lessons, truth from the same story. -

- From the 10 Commandments to the Golden Rule, in place of long volumes of texts using multiple meaning parables, Christ tries to give an easy, concise, “not-having-to-know-too-many-things” version to Salvation. -

-But you need a strong mind, need to use insight, need to interpret, and not JUST take things literally.

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So let’s assume mind reading can happen…you gotta ask to what extent…if someone were to say they can detect my thoughts, or let’s even assume I’m relayed while I slab aftershave all over my face, or while I’m in my boxers around the house, or taking a nap in my man cave of a bedrooms-which I have yet to gain the energy fo clean/organize…I mean what are my actual thoughts…I’m sure for fun it can be said he’s thinking this/that…but then, in those instances, do the orchestrators say I’m thinking what I’m writing in my blog? Aren’t those “thoughts?” When I write on the fly-perhaps I’m seen- can the orchestrators tell which direction I’m going with my writing?! So if mind reading is about thoughts, and you can’t detect my deep and “sometimes” philosophical mind, how can anyone say they’re reading my thoughts? Is that the orchestrators mistakenly saying  they detect “ impulses “ or the “sea of random things” floating through the mind?! Now Ive indicated this idea in past blog posts, maybe among the earliest of them, but I guess I have to repeat myself. So let’s assume the orchestrators detect the sea of randomness in a person’s mind…how many of those random things, popping up in the mind, do you agree with, act on, or make a “willful choice” to “contemplate further.” ?

I’m a guy and a Libran guy. I find women beautiful and enjoy killing time with women. Even in kindergarten, my best friend was a girl and I’d hover around her and keep watch while she talked in a circle with her friends. My father wanted sons, but I want at least one daughter and one son, the daughter of whom, I will probably call, “Lara.”

But back to alleged mind reading. Being a guy and, for sh*tz and giggles, a Libran guy, I see a beautiful or hot girl, my mind, like any other guy, will take directions. But reality is, while that’s happening, I could just be waiting to drop off a box at UPS. My focus is getting in and getting out of UPS, for that instant of time. I’d like to think my mind is governed by several copies of the baby version of my younger sibling. He’s a treasure and a doctor. So figuratively speaking, while waiting on that line at UPS, one of the copies of my sibling will scream, “Breakfast”, while another will scream, “ohhhh beautiful girl”, but how many will “I” act on amidst the screaming copies of my younger sibling? While my body may agree with hunger or attractions, my mind may have different plans. The orchestrators may say he thinks ur beautiful, but that’s like on impulse, without further understanding she doesn’t meet my type of smile requirements. So then, ultimately, would I consider her beautiful, for my needs? Can the alleged mind readers detect that, if it’s not actually explicitly said? I mean, my morning writings are thoughts, are those anticipated? If it’s on the basis of cr*p reading of the mind that people don’t talk to me, I tend to be shameless to the point that I walk around my room naked, under the belief I’m relayed all the time. I would totally value the person who tells me what’s going on and help me move on with my life, after all these years. All this said, this is not to takeaway from my belief that this mind crap and instruction based commanding of people, may have a role in the end of the world, as stated in yesterday’s (Wednesday morning) tweets/tumblr post. Don’t hesitate to talk to me, above all talk to me about “the situation” . I mean some confirmation/acknowledgment for living like this, for figuring out things through evidence/observation through the course of years-it’d be a reward through which youd make my day. Even if I lose a chance at being 6 ft tall or a billion dollars, I don’t care. You and me, we can start something together and say screw you to the world…Christians say the “Our Father” prayer…I say that more important than “Give us this day our daily bread.” Is “Thy Kingdom Come”. While it may refer to an actual Kingdom, there is another Kingdom in every mind. When we say that, we ask for the heaven state of mind in our heads. It brings about a strong state of mind that can handle and attain everything. It is about believing without doubt.In defense of this, Christ even says, “Seek first the Kingdom, and all these things will be given to you.” A mind close to God, that’s trained to handle anything, can achieve anything and reach new heights. In the “Our Father”, we say at the end: “For Thine is the Kingdom, the Power, and the Glory, forever and ever, Amen.”

“For Thine is the Kingdom (Throne of the Mind, where we, with our mental voice, reside amidst a sea of impulses and thoughts), the Power ( the power to influence minds and hearts belongs to God and should not be misused as “our own”, “ for human purposes”, to stupidly mind read/ mind control for government projects or social entertainment

-for this power is Holy.

Biblically, it is said, “But whoso shall cause one of these little ones who believe in Me to fall, it were better for him that a millstone were hung about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”

This is open to interpretation. The little ones or children represent innocence/purity, or an untainted mind. The crime of assaulting a mind is so severe, it would be better for that person to tie a stone around his neck and drown in the sea. To use a form of the Power of God to do it, you gotta ask, what are these people?!), and the Glory ( my survival alone, the words I relay, not from my intellect. When you see me, act natural and according to what comes to mind upon seeing me. Credit/Glory goes to The Divine. I’m just a passerby. I’m a nobody who likes to wear shades or get involved with computer work and buy his coffee and play rummy/card games with friend-girls or girl-friend. Don’t turn me into a role model, an icon, or associate me with fancy labels, for that poses danger to the First of the 10 Commandments.

Be natural, gain perspective from the relayed.)

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Religion is not about restricting your life, but to, if nothing else, give you an open mind and kind heart. Sometimes the rules and regulations make us judge one another, or give us high end superficial morals, or we get lost in the details. But they’re really guidelines to doing what’s appropriate for your life with insight. Religion can give different groups of a people an identity. Through Islam, a large group of people aim to speak one language of Arabic, and identify as one people beyond Pakistan, Afghanistan, or any of the other Middle Eastern countries.

One culture, one “new nation” identity, one language, one system to open the mind and promote kindness of heart, is the goal of religion. It is to make us our best selves and unite the world as One, be it under the label of “Earthlings” or whatever: something beyond American or I dunno Iraqi or whatever. Just be on guard: Discipline will lead to a good mind, but so that ur not robotic or overly serious, remember to train the heart. The Divine sees us as The Divine’s children. Maintain innocence and a mind open to adjusting/learning, like children.

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On another note, from observation over 30 years, I feel strict religious practices lead to things like obesity and other vices. I mean people are humans and humans have needs. Life consists of the idea of balance and taking care of your hopes, needs, desires. I mean, you may try not to drink alcohol because you think, among some peoples, that God wouldn’t approve. But that Friday/Saturday night with friends or doing/planning something fun, gives you something to look forward to. In the process of looking ur best for a party, throughout the week, you may better take care of ur health, work out, or eat right and in portions. I feel those who “have the attitude of” “alcohol is sinful” possibly also have mentalities that usually lead to vices like overeating.

In abstaining from one pleasure, you may give urself something to look forward to, by eating the best tasting foods frequently. You may eat a lot of sweets. I mean we’re human, we’ll have desires and vices. Regarding desire, it’s not desire that’s bad or questionable , but what you may possibly do to fulfill your desire or carry out your desire. You may think what else is there to enjoy in life or what else can I afford or do. This “could be” problematic. For one thing, you’ll end up obese, and an unhealthy lifestyle and eating habits can make ur mind cloudy. A cloudy mind makes bad choices or get themselves in more vices like being an inattentive spouse to ur partners conversations or a mediocre listener to your kids. These things can spiral as life from dawn to dusk is in motion in our surroundings and in the hunger and satiating of that literal/metaphorical hunger, daily. Motion!

I mean for the overly religious, a beer or two, or a shot of I dunno Johnny walker black label?! won’t kill you. In the process, it may be avenue to an insightful conversation with a potential friend. With something like sinful alcohol or whatever, I think no one thinks about whether the pros outweigh the cons, and the patterns of behavior it can lead to. While a shot of alcohol may be relaxing, too much can lead to bad choices like roaming busy streets, drunk. Alcohol is also bad for ur muscles if you wanna get jacked. But to each his own as is appropriate for their life in that particular instance of time in their lives.

On a related note, when I went out to a coffee shop mid to late Wednesday morning, it was really hot. I just showered, and was sweating a lot. After having blogged something philosophical, I started thinking about the Sikh men in the beards and turbans or the Muslim women in hijabs or even…is it called burka?(in reference to the long black gown/hoodie)…these are devoted people focused on Union with God. For a woman- I’m just guessing here- ur hair is one of ur assets. It might even be something you treasure. You, being a beautiful creature of the Divine, hiding ur silky or so hair, as a sacrifice, visible only to ur loved ones seeing ur appearance, is truly admirable. I’m sure that sacrifice won’t go ignored and will be spiritually rewarding. And regarding some of the Sikh men I’ve seen…these are some good looking dudes…I mean they’re tall, have the perfect tan, noticeable builds, and the Sikhs I’ve run into tend to skip grades in school. I knew someone who decided the turban and beard weren’t necessary, and he had a lions mane of hair and a face that shone like the sun…these men and women make these uncomfortable clothing accessory choices, not radiating the beauty God gave them, for God. In seeing this, and wishing you guys and girls the best, just wanted to share a thought. I’m a Christian. What do you think counts more in God’s eyes for me? Mechanically going to Church every Sunday and acting super perfect for the sake of what others think, or implementing the Golden Rule in my daily life? (Love God first and foremost, and your neighbor as yourself.) Does God appreciate more what I do with the gifts He gave me and me living my life in a way I can tell my Heavenly Father about my day at the end of that particular day? Does God care whether there is hair gel in my balding head on my fat mess of a body or does He value more the time I spend WITH Him in prayer and For Him in life through my words and actions? With that in mind, while the hijab or the beards and turbans will direct extra blessings ur way, I don’t think it should be required of your religions. All the hub-ub against Muslims…I mean these woman of Mediterranean and Middle Eastern descent are radiant and are like the I-Dream-of-Jeanie partners to their spouses, and their foods: from lamb gyros to the Afghan Chicken and Rice with the special sauce-some good stuff to be aware of…

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lets assume you’re not seeing SOME of these postings today, on twitter, or tumblr, for the first time...maybe it was witnessed while being typed, as I’m typing, on the Notes app on my iphone...were the orchestrators aware that I’d mention my take on the Yeast of the Pharisees and Sauducees today? What are they calling this nonsense? Mind reading? Predictive Analytics?-A waste of time, an insult to human dignity, a testament to their indecency...

[luwucas04]

About 4000 (I am so sorry) Words Concerning Films that Helped Define My Existence

Ah, movies. So much in one package. Story, music, visuals, what’s not to love? Today I shall be elaborating on the most noteworthy films in the thrilling ever-changing saga that continues to be my life. Screenplay alongside a screenplay, if you will (please take this statement as modestly as you can).

The first ever thing in my entire life that I remember being an avid and enthusiastic fan about was the original Star Wars saga, written and directed by George Lucas, spanning May 1977 (A New Hope) – May 2005 (Revenge of the Sith).

As mentioned in the podcast and as you may be able to tell from said podcast, I can’t really pinpoint an exact point in my life where I was introduced to it as it was kinda integrated into my upbringing from the get-go—and due to this it’s a very near and dear franchise to me. And oh boy fun fact my first ever childhood crush was Luke Skywalker (I vividly recall my uncle asking why I had his page bookmarked haha). I remember it was something that I would always watch with my dad and or grandpa, and then when I couldn’t find the VCR set that we had for it, I officially commenced my illicit streaming career (not really though, I didn’t get very far. Only crappy 20-minute clips on YouTube). Star Wars for me was the first thing that I actively sought out stuff for or showed genuine interest in pursuing if that makes sense. Like, you’d watch whatever movies or shows were thrown at you and you never thought much of them. Ohoho not Star Wars, though, that one lasted years. My cousin and I would always bring our little action figures to play with whenever we visited—or we’d find long-ish sticks in the backyard and have lightsaber fights, I got the video games, posters, Lego sets of ships (X-wing and Y-wing to be exact), an entire encyclopedia that I still own to this day (I just checked and there’s a date written inside, April 9th 2010 (which is my 7th birthday)), and of course inspiration for my own art and such. I remember I made this magazine that was essentially just me redrawing pages from the guidebook I had. I still have it, too! Sitting at the bottom of a drawer right now. Also, later on for some reason I absolutely loved drawing Ashoka Tano. Over and over again man. I drew her taking up my cousin’s entire driveway in chalk once.

Not only are the Star Wars films a nostalgic and comforting series, but it held onto its marvel throughout the. Wow well over 10 whole years, I’m getting old. Additionally, because at the time we didn’t have as much access to the things we can achieve with modern technology, I was basically all on my own with it. I fueled my own fascination. And shockingly, not a lot of people in my elementary school (up until maybe grade 6-7) showed much interest in it either. So it was pretty much just me myself and I, and occasionally my cousin whenever he visited, and I think that made it all the more special to me. Also, at the time I think it was geared way more toward kids. There weren’t series like The Mandalorian or active internet communities that were obsessed with the series as far as I was aware, so there wasn’t the same quantity of content nor overall enthusiasm around it. Nonetheless, it was and still is a very personal series due to how engrained it is into basically every aspect of my childhood. I’ll try not to be too repetitive with what I said in the podcast, but ultimately the clear nature of the franchise (attractive character designs, colours, setting in general (it’s an action-packed space adventure what’s not to love)) is what really made me latch onto it, and it kickstarted my interest in the very essence of media and understanding the film medium and what it has to offer. I remember asking how they got Jar Jar to exist on screen and he told me they made him out of CGI, and I interpreted that as they somehow made a real-life computer model out of him and that they were actually interacting with like a physical, solid hologram. Anyway, revisiting the franchise and diving into more of its intricacies now (like the production diaries) is like an absolute goldmine. There are so many aspects of it that 100% contributed to and nurtured my goals, passions, and ultimately who I am as a person. Here is some of my very recent art for good measure:

Up next up we got Lord of the Rings (dir. Peter Jackson, December 2001 – December 2003) or I guess a better way to put it would be those plus The Hobbit (December 2012 – December 2014) trilogy. I think it was earlier than the Marvel phase (which follows this section) because like Star Wars I can’t really remember my first viewing of it, but I definitely watched it all. It might’ve been around grade 3 so 2011-ish? Quick anecdote, one time I had a sleepover I was really excited for, and as we all know when you’re excited for something as a kid and it’s later on in the day, time doesn’t actually pass at all, and so my genius ass decided to flip on The Fellowship of the Ring and boom it was 5 pm and time to leave. Also my grandparents from my mom’s side of the family (they’re German so we call them oma and opa) were visiting once and my opa (grandpa equivalent) wanted to watch something so I was like “omg Lord of the Rings is perfect there are so many characters he can feel empowered by (Gandalf and Saruman because they’re old)”. Phenomenal logic—now thinking back it was probably much too violent for his tastes but yknow.

I love Lord of the Rings so much because it’s the true embodiment of an ideal fantasy story; there’s such pure character dynamics and personalities and Tolkien created such an incredibly solid world in which these stories take place. Man knew his stuff, and in turn provided a charming and utterly wonderful scape for young minds to roam free within. I was going to talk about this if I did my other culminating idea regarding masculinity within the media, but I have the perfect opportunity to do so here: something so great about said world is how sincere and genuine a lot of the male characters are (yknow minus people like Denethor and Alfred). Namely the fellowship, they all openly care for and are affectionate towards one another, something we rarely see between men both in modern media and in real life. Aragorn is a perfect example of someone owning and being comfortable in his masculinity. He is kind to and uplifts others, and communicates openly with them. He isn’t afraid of being intimate and vulnerable towards them, either. We see this in Boromir’s death scene. Aragorn doesn’t patronize him for trying to take the Ring, he consoles Boromir in his last moments and they treat each other with the utmost tenderness and respect—not callously or stiffly. Right after decapitating an orc, Aragorn is still able to run to his side, hold him, and kiss him on the forehead following his passing. Aragorn also isn’t afraid to share fame or glory, in fact he never seeks it out in the first place despite his lineage. It was at the battle of Helm’s Deep that he embraced that destine to be king, not out of lust for power, but because these people needed guidance and leadership and he could provide it for them. He elevates others in an incredibly positive and empowering way, especially Frodo and Éowyn, and is content with the fact that the story is not about him. Even at his own coronation, he directs every single person’s attention to the literal earth-saving feat that the hobbits have achieved in light of his own massive accomplishment. He is such a great role model to have been able to look up and aspire to be like, and I wish there were more characters and people like him.

I was a fan of those original films at an earlier point in my life, but the thing that brought that interest back a little stronger was undoubtedly the release of the Hobbit prequels. Like the Star Wars prequels, everyone can say what they want but they are very gorgeous to me. I skipped out on seeing Frozen with my class to go see The Desolation of Smaug with my dad and that was SUCH a good decision. Although, I’m rewatching them all now and Battle of the Five Armies kinda sucks at the beginning. They kill Smaug in like the first five minutes and like it wasn’t bad but it was very anticlimactic. I also don’t like how they shoved Legolas in there, his personality is really jaded and he’s kind of a big prick in those films. But it’s fine I love Martin Freeman and Richard Armitage and the rest of the dwarves the most. They were obviously the most significant and I like them a lot, and there are three movies as opposed to the one book so there’s even more content!

WHEW sorry about that anyway The Hobbit really was the revival/rekindling of that past love for Tolkien’s world. I also had a good close friend who was also along for the ride as well—being able to be into these things alongside someone is always fun and I’m grateful she was there and shared my same energy. She had the Lego game for that one, very similar free-roam concept as my Marvel one (coming up next), so we had lots of fun with that too. To reiterate, I am rewatching these movies again now as an older person with like an actual conscience, and my takeaway from them is vastly different on more of like… a philosophical level, I suppose. I appreciate the process of things more and the backstory behind Tolkien’s lore and the timeless characters and deeper meanings that he’s conceived. But that wouldn’t be very chronological of me to go into it here so moving on.

Proceeding next, around grade four at the most (so just after it came out), I watched The Avengers (dir. Joss Whedon, 2012). Not only did this single-handedly make my art convictions explode (in a good way), it also instigated my love for soundtracks (and also the entire Marvel universe but we’ll obviously be covering that very soon).

The Avengers was like an epiphany for me. Literally ground-breaking and earth-shattering. Changed my entire 10-year-old life. It was all that I ever wanted and more, and since it was around 2012-13 that I became aware of its existence, the internet community was blossoming with possibilities and content. That same friend liked it as well! My Avengers/Marvel phase definitely rivals my Star Wars phase; I think I watched The Avengers first, and then my dad was like “yeah ok you need to watch everything else now” and so henceforth Captain America and Iron Man and Thor. Those were very good times, and I actually remember experiencing all of them for the first time ever. The Christmas of 2013 was absolutely wild. I only got Marvel related gifts which was incredible at the time. My first ever ‘art of’ book was for the Avengers film, too! I also got an arc reactor shirt that actually lit up and I thought that was the absolute coolest thing ever, and then I remember I cut my tongue on this candy I was eating and my mouth bled profusely for a while. However the most iconic gift of all was my copy of Lego Marvel Superheroes for the PS3. I finished it in about 2 days, and it’s the only Lego game that I’ve gotten 100% completed progress on. I love that game dearly and still play it sometimes. The thing that I love specifically about it was the ability to free-roam the entirety of New York City as any character you wanted, me and that friend would do that exclusively for hours on end and make up our own stories with all the characters. Here is Galactus perusing the streets

Speaking of characters, this was the first thing that really got me making up and drawing a shit ton (apologies for lack of a better phrase) of original characters. I’d make superhero characters for me and my friend (ok I guess I should give her a name huh), Mackenzie, and even for random people in my class cause we needed to fill in some blanks in the stories we’d make. I’d create comics, write little stories, make variation after variation of these people we came up with, and of course like normal children me and Mackenzie would go to the park near my old house and pretend we were said characters. Man it was so fun. Then we’d do all those personality quizzes to find out which member you were most like. Mackenzie and I would do these quizzes on none other than our state-of-the-art BlackBerry playbooks. For me it was usually either Iron Man or Thor, and Mackenzie had this weird curse where she’d only ever get Loki as a result for anything at all which was very hilarious to me. Circling back to soundtracks, The Avengers OST was one of my first full album purchases. The main theme was my favourite track out of all of them for obvious reasons, but I still paid respects to all of them and listened to it often. Since I bought it with my dad’s Apple ID, it’d show up on the communal iPad that we used for music in the kitchen and I have full recollection of my grandpa playing it on blast in the morning to wake us up one time. I was aggravated at first but then when I realized what it was I was like ah yes of course. After the Avengers soundtrack, I got the Wolverine (2013) OST and that was fun but I didn’t like all the tracks in the same way, but THEN I got the Days of Future Past soundtrack. THAT is a good soundtrack AND a phenomenal film.

Anyway, after that I was a Marvel connoisseur for a little while. Like Star Wars I got an entire character encyclopedia, a bunch of comics, posters, you name it. My parents and sister also enjoyed dabbling in stuff too; we’d watch the animated series together on Netflix and eventually ended up seeing all the new movies together when they came out in theatres (except not my mom though cause she gets motion sickness from action films). Marvel was a staple in the adolescence stage of my life before I was introduced to anime (then it was all downhill from there (I am kidding anime was a part of my life that I look back at with great fondness)). It was reason for so much of what I explored with my art and my own imagination, and was one of my first experiences in what it was like to be a part of a fandom-esque community. There were also memes ripe for the picking when it came to Marvel; as one can assume I had no access to memes in kindergarten to grade 1 in the late 2000s. It was such a lovely and warm point in my life, something that established what kind of passion I really poured into something when I really liked it. And akin to Star Wars, there’s just so much to like about it. There’s so much to offer, an array of colourful characters and storylines—and of course, creative liberty when it came to superpowers and that whole narrative. The sky was literally the limit. Here is some of my ancient 2014 portraiture that I dug up for the sake of this assignment

Ok heads up we are now veering AWAY from childhood content and touching on a film that played a more personal part, namely during a very pivotal point, in my life. I picked up The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Stephen Chbosky, 1999) at a bookstore and read it at the speed of light; I was crying in my room on my bed by the time I finished it. I love how we see Charlie’s character change over the course of the novel, not only through what he describes or how he perceives things but his style of writing in general. Anyway, I wanted to read the novel first before I watched the movie (dir. Stephen Chbosky 2012), and I was pleasantly surprised by how accurate the movie is to the book (well duh the author directed it). I read/watched this right before I started high school, so I was kind of (but not really considering the built-up childhood trauma he has yikes) in the same position as the protagonist, Charlie, as he was starting out (minus a lot of the major aspects of his character and what he went/goes through (like drugs)). A lot of the things that he learns were really important takeaways for me before heading into that new chapter of life like he did.

Contrary to the title of the (I know it started out as a novel but I’m just gonna say film) film, you need to put yourself out there and advocate for yourself in life. It’s great to be a trustworthy individual whom everyone is vaguely aware of and likes, but you need to approach things with reason and make yourself known somehow. At the time, both before and during grade 9, and even still sometimes in the present (though I do it more deliberately now), I found myself just standing on the sidelines as life happened before me and I let it sweep me away without having any feet planted on the ground. It was like I wasn’t in control of it, and in turn I might’ve struggled in some areas more than I should have. I didn’t own anything, like I wasn’t totally present. Similar to Charlie, I was a person who’d always be there for others, someone people could talk to and confide in, and ultimately someone people truly enjoyed having around—which is pretty great. But I didn’t fully know my position or what I ultimately wanted in any of those situations. Don’t get me wrong, I am incredibly grateful for my entire freshman experience and I absolutely wouldn’t have wanted it any other way considering all personal circumstances, but with that foreknowledge of the importance of making a name for yourself, especially in high school, I think I was able to branch out with ease a bit more than I would have without it. I at least was aware of what was going on in that sense. That movie is really special to me because it ended up being a pseudo-mirror of my own experiences. Charlie’s English teacher, Bill, embraced his writing abilities and urged him to participate more, share his own thoughts, and express more of his personality by giving him books for extra reading. My first ever semester of Laurier did the exact same for me as Bill did for Charlie. It fostered my interests and intellectual abilities, and you guys constantly urged me and everyone else to go above and beyond what we were used to because you knew we could do it (even though I feel like I could’ve done a lot better on some things as my marks in grade 9 are a bit lower than I’d like them to be, but hey it was a time of adjustment and I did my best and that’s what matters). As a direct result of Laurier, I’m really lucky to have been surrounded by an amazing group of passionate students, a handful of which became my closest friends throughout high school, and that my very first teachers of the day were people who uplifted me and genuinely cared not only about furthering my academic work, but about my growth as a person.

Whew let’s wade out of the sap and get into some more energetic stuff!!! To tie off this recollection of my life through film the most recent and notable movie that impacted my life was, the one and only, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (dir. Peter Ramsey, Bob Persichetti, Rodney Rothman, 2018). Similar to The Desolation of Smaug and Frozen, I went with my dad to the cinema but parted ways with him to watch this movie by my lonesome (he went to the Aquaman theatre instead smh). Again, phenomenal choice. I talked about this in my grade 11 blog, but Spider-Verse is an absolute masterpiece in every way shape and form.

At the point I watched it, I knew what I wanted to generally do with my life (be part of the art industry) and the visuals of this movie alone were enough to make me want to elope with it and never see or talk to anyone ever again. It is such a gorgeous film. The way they strayed from the yucky 3D conventions norm—and there is literally no way they could’ve done the majority of what they did in that movie effectively if they did it live action. Or, they could definitely try and make an attempt, but it’d look like garbage. For example, a lot of the action scenes in general and also when they become abstracted like with the particle collider. 40-60 fps would not do that sense of movement justice at all. Too smooth. Not enough grit and personality.

Anyway, they also pioneered new animation techniques in mixing 2D and 3D, and explored a newer superhero trope where the main character’s own mundane life struggles are equally as important as him trying to sort things out with these new powers. It’s more of a battle between what Miles wants with his own personal life—new school, the friends he won’t be able to see because of said new school, owning his own abilities and adjusting to change. Then on top of that he’s met with all these alternate-dimension people that he has to work and be on par with. Aside from the art, I thought the overall message was every special: Miles learns through trial and tribulations, unsureness—and most importantly, failure. Confidence and optimism, in regard to what he thinks he can and can’t do, is vital. Amidst everything he is faced with, he starts out as just another kid who wants to be just another kid. But we all have something special inside us that we must choose to embrace if we want to truly flourish. We see him come to terms with the fact that he really is capable of greatness if he sets his mind to it—and that’s the main message: anyone can wear the mask. And can we talk about that soundtrack??? Not only the instrumentals, but the actual songs were great too! “Sunflower” and “What’s Up Danger”? Lovely and fitting. And back to the OST, the Prowler’s theme??? Shivers.

There is such a unique and beautiful vibe to this movie, and it’s inspired me in more ways than one. Aside from that nice motivational stuff, it also has recently played a tremendous part in developing my own art. All of the artists who worked on the film are people I immediately tried to find on social media so I could see more of their work. I purchased the art book, and even bought a 2D sequence illustration course provided by one of the art directors, Patrick O’Keefe. That course also came with the (digital) brushes he uses, and I’ve used them in pretty much every single one of my pieces since downloading them. This movie really showed me the possibilities of what could be achieved in the art industry, and it made me want to be a part of it so much more than I was before. I want to be involved in revolutionary visual achievements, and I want to develop characters and stories and worlds that are as interesting and loveable as the ones in Spider-Verse. (my stuff featured below)

So there you have it folks, 5 (five) of the most significant movies in my life relayed in a whopping just over 4000 words. I hope this has been enlightening for all you readers out there, perhaps you now have a better understanding of how I came to be personality/interest-wise, and I hope you can catch a glimpse of that same importance these pieces of media have in regard to me and my values.

[jin-boyang]

Boyang Jin & Han Yan discuss their performance, next steps, Chinese figure skating, and more in an interview after the 2017 Asian Winter Games (translation below)

t/n: for simplicity, I mostly used Boyang and Han's given names although full names were sometimes said in the video.

Interviewer: (Introduces channel/networks, talks about 2017 Asian Winter Games.) Today our two guests are those you've already seen on TV, men's singles figure skaters who have represented China well here, Boyang Jin and teammate Han Yan. We've already spoken with Han once, before this competition started. Let's congratulate these two for achieving the silver and bronze medals at this competition.

Han: Thank you.

Interviewer: And thank them for joining us. This time, Boyang performed pretty well. The screen is giving us a replay [of his free skate]. This question is for both of you to answer together: after this event, both of you stood on the podium. Were you satisfied? Did it go as planned?

Boyang: Probably there are still some regrets.

Interviewer: Why?

Boyang: On the first day, there was the combination. It was still okay, as I ended up first.

Interviewer: You were leading after the short program.

Boyang: Yes. But compared to second place -

Interviewer: Let's look at the replay again, review your reaction to the score at the time. What does that [reaction in the K&C after the free skate] mean? Was it a bit of excitement?

Boyang: There was also a bit of regret.

Interviewer: Because you knew you were second.

Boyang: Yes, second.

Interviewer: Look, Han. This movement [at the beginning of the free skate] is very cool. I really wanted to say, your black costume is very cool, very handsome.

Han: Thank you.

Interviewer: And the modelling of the starting pose, right away it's very fierce. Today, right away it felt like Han would be dramatic, maybe because after our chat I could understand you better. Now, Boyang, you said there were still some small mistakes. After placing first in the short, how did it go afterwards?

Boyang: There was still, compared to second place, a difference of only 0.something. In the free skate, it was probably the error on just one jump that caused me to place second.

Interviewer: There was a bit of, it's called a pop, right?

Boyang: Yes.

Interviewer: Actually, I thought your overall performance, since you didn't fall or anything like that, didn't have [t/n: pause in audio, maybe something got censored out]. That should have made some difference. 7 points, 8 points?

Boyang: 7.5, maybe. (laughs)

Interviewer: 7.5, still 2.5 to go. Go for it. How did it go for Han this time? Before the competition, we went to your hotel to chat. At the time, you were a bit nervous, but also a bit excited, eager to show yourself. In the end, getting into the top 3 and standing on the podium, what's your evaluation?

Han: It was still, although this set of programs is different from what I usually perform, for my performance this time -

Interviewer: Let's look at these movements [in the free skate]. A slight interruption. These are some transitional moves.

Han: It's after the last jump.

Interviewer: After the last jump, at the end. At this time, in the ending section, does it feel like everything is already complete?

Han: At that time, I still wasn't thinking of what comes afterward. I was still thinking about how to get more points.

Interviewer: All of these count for points.

Han: Yes.

Interviewer: We're still following the replay, at this time you were behind the leader by about 6 points, so you were still trying to catch up. At the end of your program, you had the highest technical score.

Han: Yes.

Interviewer: Tell us a bit more. (gestures to screen) What are you thinking of at this time? How to complete the program? Look, with coach Mingzhu Li. Share your feelings with us, the feeling of leading both in technical and total score after your skate.

Han: I thought the result was not something I especially cared about. My biggest takeaway this time was to have lots of confidence and see whether I live up to my hard work this year.

Interviewer: Before this competition, you both knew that for the Japanese competitors, as the hosts, had some home advantage. Many people have expressed their opinions online during the event. Actually, I could have been more excited and nervous than you guys, I kept sending messages to [Han] even though I knew you wouldn't see it (Han: laughs). At the time, I thought the Japanese skater, Shoma Uno - who is the same age as [Boyang], so it's easier to compare - the judges' scores resulted in a difference of 1.19 points. Were you satisfied? He fell twice and had a slim margin of victory. What are your thoughts?

Boyang: For me, it's a type of encouragement. I also have regrets, but I know the mistakes that I made and will put more effort toward the next competition and afterwards, including for the Olympics, to know how to work harder to perfect these two programs.

Interviewer: I actually feel that for you two, in many events, both coming from team China, complement each other. Of course, you're not skating as a pair (B: laughs), but Han's magnetism and artistic impact are very strong, while Boyang is often known as a 'king' of base value, with all the quads, completing many elements with high base value and few errors. Could it be understood this way, that the two of you have complementary strengths and weaknesses? Han?

Han: Yes. I think that the two of us (gestures to Boyang) -

Boyang: Combining.

Han: If we could combine (All: laugh), then definitely -

Interviewer: Then it would become more ideal.

Han: Of course, yes, it would become ideal. Everyone has their strengths.

Interviewer: Yes.

Han: And each skater takes a different path. I think, for Chinese men’s singles skating, that’s a very good thing. We have different styles.

Interviewer: Two pieces advancing side by side, growing together.

Han: Yes.

Interviewer: And the age difference is also just one year.

Han: Yes, we can learn from each other.

Interviewer: Although Han is said to be the big brother, the big brother is actually just one year older. Usually, except for competitions where you represent China together, your regular training locations are different, with [Boyang] at hometown Harbin and so on. Is there much communication?

Boyang: There isn’t a lot. Training for the entire day, and after going home, we have our own hobbies. At events, or when training in Beijing, there will be [more].

Interviewer: In the arena, we can see the aura is fierce and has a strong pull. On the ice, it’s like leading a little brother. It’s very clear. However, this time, on the mental front, I’ve already asked Han about this. Earlier Boyang’s answers were still very diplomatic - he’s only 19 but he has a [t/n: some four word idioms here?] way of replying.Were you convinced about your loss today? Not in terms of power, but losing to the competitor who was favoured politically by the judges.

Han: I don’t think there was underscoring like that this time, your description is too severe.

Interviewer: The home ice advantage does exist.

Han: Yes. I think the judges did like him. Each skater has a different style, and perhaps he was luckier here.

Interviewer: Put it this way. He does have his strengths, not giving up after 2 falls, continuing to sell his program and add value to make up for lost points and components. In this type of event, what do the two of you think you can learn from him? Let’s talk about that.

Boyang: I think he is a strong competitor. On the ice in a competition, it’s often different from practice, but he’s the type who can give more than 100%. I’d like to learn from the fierceness he has when competing.

Interviewer: In a competition, for some, being able to show 70% or 80% of what one can do in practice is pretty good, but other competitors, like you said, can give a performance under pressure that they normally wouldn’t be able to. Which type are you?

Boyang: I’m more a balanced type. (laughs)

Interviewer: The level that you reach in practice -

Boyang: It’s almost reflected in competition.

Interviewer: Boyang is fairly steady. In today’s performance, elements were executed without too much variation. Han, what about you - are you better in practice, or competition, or, as he said, more balanced?

Han: (laughs)

Interviewer: Answer honestly.

Han: Perhaps I used to be the competition type, but this time I didn’t go over 100%. I made some mistakes and have some regrets.

Interviewer: This event, however, I feel like it’s the best you’ve been recently. In both the short program and the free skate, there were things here and there, but I think it can be said that you performed both programs well and things went smoothly. Earlier you also talked about having confidence. Looking back at the past while, 12 months or so, you’ve overcome a period of hardship, right?

Han: Hardship is maybe a bit exaggerated, but personally it was a difficult time. When I first moved up to the senior level, things went quite smoothly, and -Interviewer: Lots of people were paying attention to you, too.

Han: Yes, and then I felt like I was -

Interviewer: Reached that level.

Han: Like ‘it’s OK now’. But I still had a long way to go. From knowledge to training, this year I’ve managed to improve a lot.

Interviewer: Boyang, how do you see yourself? I feel like people say you’re a ‘good boy’ type, and when teachers and coaches say something you’ll do that, with self regulation. In this kind of process, would you use a lot of, say, [Han]’s experiences as a reference to improve yourself?

Boyang: I really like figure skating. In training, especially for jumps, I like to challenge these moves, so it’s a type of pleasure.

Interviewer: In men’s figure skating, you can really see the artistic side, the fierceness, performance, and interpretation and understanding of the music, from Rachmaninoff to the R&J which [Han] selected beautifully. Apart from discussing with choreographers and coaches, how do you choose your music? How do you yourself strengthen your understanding of the pieces? Are there other aspects where you strive to do more? Han?

Han: Since my free skate music is a film soundtrack, watching the film can be helpful for grasping the true meaning.

Interviewer: Improving comprehension.

Han: Improving comprehension. The short program music is a song. Looking at the lyrics and seeing what they’re really trying to express, as well as the mood of the singer - these are all things to investigate.

Interviewer: Boyang, do you also read books or take further steps like that to improve in this area?

Boyang: Yes, my short program is Spiderman and I like watching the movies.

Interviewer: (in English) Spiderman. Uh-huh.

Boyang: Yes, the first animations I watched as a child were superhero ones like Spiderman, so I like it a lot. Right now, It's not as [t/n: didn’t catch this part] as before. I feel like I can immerse myself, so I like it a lot.

Interviewer: To both of you, I've been saying, today we talked for a while about next steps and improvement. I think these two have not only become notable competitors in men's singles figure skating in Asia, but also able to reach the top 15 or 20 in the world. Our overall technique and model is continually improving and expanding. Compared to Western skaters, the gap that used to be prominent is getting narrower and we have more chances to challenge them, is that right? Boyang?

Boyang: Since the internet is quite advanced now - whether it's communication abroad, watching movies, improving one's understanding of other cultures - it's easier to learn systematically, so we're closer.

Interviewer: Compared to the Spanish star Fernandez or the Japanese Hanyu, who didn't attend this competition, Han, from your perspective, where are you two lacking and how could you improve these weaknesses?

Han: I think Asian skaters aren't necessarily worse.

Interviewer: I was hoping you would say that.

Han: In fact, we’re leading.

Interviewer: In what areas?

Han: Taking the Chinese national team as an example, our training conditions and the support we get are top tier. When I went to the US, I’ve experienced how there are more people who like figure skating there, and each skater is on their own in the process. For us, we have a system.

Interviewer: Techniques and a system for support.

Han: Yes, my trip to America this time had a big impact on me. I feel like [a system] is very important. For the two of us (gestures between himself and Boyang), compared to Western skaters, we’re lacking - the top Western skaters -

Interviewer: The strongest ones.

Han: Yes. The differences are, it’s not a huge disparity. Boyang is lacking in some performance -

Interviewer: Artistry and magnetism.

Han: Yes, and I’m lacking in my base value. So he’s already one of the best on the technical side, and I don’t feel like my performance is too far from the best.

Interviewer: (gestures to the screen) I feel like you’re really immersed in your performance, it really shows.

Han: So we can only say, overcome our weaknesses, patch them up and show Chinese figure skating to everyone.

Interviewer: Boyang, on the topic of your artistry and performance, further steps need to be taken in refinement and improvement. What’s missing?

Boyang: It could be the number of repetitions and the overall finesse. Practicing more times [would be useful].

Interviewer: In western countries, there are many figure skaters in all disciplines and they have a broad reach. For us, how can we connect with our audience [in China] and say, ‘more people should participate and immerse themselves in such a beautiful sport’? What do you want to say? Share a few words with us.

Han: I don’t think we need words. I think talking more about this topic doesn’t hold much significance. We can just let our results speak for us. By getting good scores, we can let everyone know what a beautiful, mesmerizing discipline this is. Only through that can we move people to join us.

Interviewer: That’s a very true statement. It’s a similar thought to [2004 Olympic Gold Medalist] Xiang Liu’s. At that time, we had little understanding of the men’s 110m hurdles event. Nobody could remember the 12.88 second result. But once Xiang Liu’s achievements came out and he broke the world record, everyone knew how breaking the 12.88 seconds was very difficult and so on. Many people became more interested in the details of the sport. Do you agree?

Boyang: Yes.

Interviewer: The World Championships are coming up for both of you, and it’s another good chance to showcase our country’s abilities in men’s singles figure skating.

Han: Yes.

Interviewer: What are your expectations?

Boyang: Since this year’s World Championships determine the number of spots we get for next year’s Olympics -

Interviewer: Qualification.

Boyang: It’s an especially important event this year. So, after gaining confidence at the Asian Winter Games, we train some more.

Interviewer: For Han, I think  - talk about yourself first, no need to mention the ‘younger brother’ - do you consider yourself a perfectionist?

Han: Yes.

Interviewer: It’s necessary in order to display yourself, right?

Han: I think, as figure skaters, all of us are a bit different from other athletes in some areas.

Interviewer: Self-appreciation, etc.

Han: Yes, self-appreciation, narcissism (laughs). As well, lots of sensitivity to mistakes and to nuances in the music and rhythm. We’re very sensitive.

Interviewer: Boyang, is it the same for you? Striving for the extreme.

Boyang: Yes. And more narcissism. (All: laugh)

Interviewer: In fact, that’s not a bad thing, since it means having higher expectations for yourself. Today, after receiving your medals, did you contact your family?

Han: (laughs) I didn’t.

Interviewer: Did they watch your performance?

Han: On TV, probably. One of my quirks is that I don’t like having people who are close to me watch me compete.

Interviewer: They could have watched without you knowing.

Han: I’ve already told them, so they basically don’t come to watch me. Usually it’ll be the TV.

Interviewer: Ah, so just not watching live.

Han: Yes, yes.

Interviewer: Boyang, your mom was in the arena though, right?

Boyang: Yes, my mom.

Interviewer: Since she was watching live, does that encourage you or make you more nervous?

Boyang: My mom likes to follow - I like to be with her, and she likes to be with me.

Interviewer: Is that right?

Boyang: So, no matter where I go, to competitions, she’s there.

Interviewer: Does her presence make you feel steadier?

Boyang: Yes, a sense of steadiness. (Both: laugh)

Interviewer: Although you can’t stay at the same hotel, she provides a feeling of warmth and comfort.

Boyang: Sense of steadiness.

Interviewer: Sense of steadiness. After you received your silver medal, what did she say to you?

Boyang: She told me, ‘you are the fattest’. (covers mouth, laughs) No, I meant to say, ‘you are the best’. [t/n: ‘fat’ and ‘good’ sound similar in Chinese.]

Interviewer: (laughs) Not the fattest, of course. The next event, in Finland, will she follow as well?

Boyang: Probably, yes.

Interviewer: Wow, look at that. Han, is that something you would consider as well, having your family travel along?

Han: No, that’s not good. (laughs) I feel that [having them] silently pay attention makes me feel most comfortable, since they are people I care about, so if they come, it would bring me some nervousness.

Interviewer: Don’t worry, we will also silently support you, but from less of a distance. (Han: laughs) Supporting Boyang as well. At this competition, I think the two of you have already completed your duties to both your country and yourself. You were able to stand on the podium - not on the highest podium, but on the podium - we saw two Chinese flags rise during the medal ceremony, a tribute to you two. (Goes over the channel/networks again) Today we invited these two, (Boyang, Han: wave) Boyang Jin and Han Yan. At this event, in men’s singles figure skating, they’ve brought home two medals, one silver and one bronze. We look forward to their performances at the World Championships. Thank you. (shakes hands with both)

[greendaleshistorian]

A, S and T for the asks if you're still doing them?

Sorry it took so long! I’m back--!

A - Your current OTP(s)/OT3(s)/OTX(s)

I don’t really think I have any true otps, etc. I really like a variety of relationships, like Marith in a Queer-Platonic way, but I struggle with real OTPs because I have such a separation of different ways characters are written. 

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon (prompts optional but encouraged)

I wrote this in a post a long time ago but--

so we’ve considered the idea that upon taking mary wardwell’s body… lilith’s eyesight is actual rubbish and she pulls all-nighters to do paperwork with glasses because she would rather do overtime on admin than have anyone see her in glasses which ruins her brooding, death stare aesthetic…

but have we considered that mary’s eyesight is actually fine now because lilith remembers how absolutely horrid it was and decided to help her out? and that mary wardwell, who doesn’t even remember a time when she could read a street sign clearly from six feet away, just wears clear lenses in her new glasses because what on earth is she going to do without them???

I like the idea of Mary having friends? Also on my rp blog--

headcanon: mary wardwell and dr cerberus have been long time friends.

even though they’ve grown a more distant over the years, seeing as they’ve both grown into separate careers and jobs, they keep tabs on each other now and again, sharing stories of work and talking about the latest horror films or comic releases.

dr cerberus always had a small box prepped if mary walked in, filled with her favourite tea and a book he pulled from stock. he always refuses to let her pay for it, of course. but in return, mary would slip the cash in the tip jar when he wasn’t looking. 20 years ago this started, and since they have/had an elaborate game of mary walking in and dr cerberus getting a five-minute headstart where he got to hide the tip jar. she had to find it before dr cerberus closed if she wanted to leave him the money. he’s only won five times in 20 years.

dr cerberus once had a famous horror-comic artist come to the store. unfortunately, the one day the author was able to stay, mary had parent-teacher conferences. even though she was disappointed, she was grateful that dr cerberus promised to get her a signed copy. the morning of the event, dr ceberus surprised mary on her lunch hour with a takeaway meal… and the guest artist. she was flustered, of course, but was so incredibly thankful. she and the artist talked about horror themes for the entire lunch hour, and he offered, if ever she was interested, to write her. mary still has the author’s address pinned to the inside copy of her personalized book at home. she made dr cerberus sign and date it right under the author for his kindness.

Yea, these are the things i think of.

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything)

I won’t die defending any headcanon because it is a headcanon. I’ll defend people’s right to headcanon (without hate or hatefulness), but I don’t have anything I really would “die” for, even metaphorically. I understand my version of a character is my version, and others have different relationships and interpretations with these same characters.

For my personal headcanons, I would love if others liked them. But I won’t force them. 

Thank you for asking!!

[rebeccahpedersen]

Everybody Wants To Talk About DEBT!

TorontoRealtyBlog

Was last week March Break?

I barely noticed.

Sure, the real estate market was slow, and that always happens this time of year.  But if you had told me that it was actually “Debt Week,” I might have believed you.

When I sat down on Friday afternoon to read all the articles I had bookmarked during the week, I noticed a common theme.  Aside from SNC Lavalin, which is actually boring the pants off me right now, I noticed that there were a solid five or six articles about debt.

Consumer debt, mortgage debt, worldwide debt, and the debt that finances real estate construction – all appeared in front-page stories in the major newspapers.

There are so many directions in which we could take today’s conversation, especially with the Federal budget being announced this week, so let me feed you a few links from last week (all of which you should read!) and provide my comments as well as the takeaways.

–

From the Huffington Post on Friday, March 15th:

“Total Debt Worldwide Hits $240 Trillion And The Bank Of Canada Is Worried”

A number like $240 Trillion is eye-catching, and yet I think this headline would have been lost on most casual readers.

Sure, the number is big.  But it’s so big that it almost seems out-of-touch with the average reader, who is more concerned with the $25 charge on their Rogers bill that they don’t understand.  I really fail to believe that 90% of the population could care at all whether worldwide debt is $240 Trillion or $240 Million.  Many don’t understand the difference, but even those that do likely just aren’t interested.

I mean, how does that number affect you?

You being anybody from the 21-year-old who just finished school and is trying to decide whether to get a job at ABC Corp riding a desk all day, or try your hand at becoming an “Influencer” on social media, to a 46-year-old, middle-class parent of two, to a 72-year-old retiree bouncing back and forth between Florida and the GTA every few months.

Pardon my cynicism this early on a Monday morning, but while the regular TRB reader both understands and cares about that headline, most people do not.  And perhaps that is part of the reason why worldwide debt is at an all-time high?

Very few people out there could actually sit down and hold an intellectual conversation about where the world could or will be in two, five, or ten years if this continues, and/or if the same countries continue borrowing, and the same countries continue lending.

Does the guy living in the proverbial trailer-park in Alabama really understand the $22 Trillion national debt?  If you told him that countries like China & Japan partially own the mighty United States, don’t you think he would just stereotypically kick back another Budweiser and yell ‘Merica?

Does the 20-year-old at Ryerson University have any interest in fiscal and monetary policy?  Do they even teach that in school anymore?  I know, I know – tell me once again that I’m out of touch, but I’ll gladly take that as a compliment if we’re somehow rewarding and applauding the 27-year-old downtown condo-dweller for taking 42 photos of his salad to get the “right one” for Instagram, rather than reading…………………a book.

Yeah, that made me sound old alright.

But my point is that part of the reason that worldwide debt is so high is because of two things that we will never change:

1) People don’t understand. 2) People don’t care.

On a worldwide basis, people don’t care.  Why does worldwide debt interest the average Canadian?  It doesn’t.

On an individual basis, many people still don’t care.  Should the 27-year-old condo dweller spend $1,200 on his VISA for bottle service at a nightclub on Saturday night?  The answer doesn’t matter, because he’s going to.  He’ll simply “deal with it.”

That’s my rant.

Now for the most notable portion of the Huffington Post article:

Canada’s high household debt, which is now more than 178 per cent of disposable income, is the central bank’s top domestic financial vulnerability, she said.

“The good news for Canadian businesses and households is that the financial system — globally and here at home — is safer than it was a decade ago thanks to much stronger safeguards,” she said.

Wilkins added it’s important for policy-makers around the world to continue efforts to conduct stress tests on different parts of the financial system, and, when necessary, put in safeguards.

Say what you want about Canadian real estate, the CMHC, interest rates, borrowing, and the like, but let’s not ever lose sight of the fact that our banking system is one of the safest in the world, and that’s partially due to all of the changes implemented after we watched the sub-prime mortgage crisis play out in the United States in 2008…

–

From the CBC.ca on Thursday, March 14th:

“Statistics Canada Says Household Debt Grew Faster Than Income In Fourth Quarter”

Let me sound like an old man again and say, “I remember.”

I remember when the ratio of household debt to income topped 120%.

I remember when it topped 130%.

By the time it topped 140%, it was clear that things weren’t going to change.

It topped 150% back around 2008.

I barely noticed when it topped 160%.

Hovering in the 160’s, I started to round up and say “About 170%.”

And last week, a report came out that noted household debt in Canada rose from 178.3% in the 3rd quarter of 2018 to 178.5% in the 4th quarter.  I mean, that’s basically 179%, which is basically 180%.

So there we are!  A new threshold!

From the article:

On a seasonally adjusted basis, Statistics Canada said households borrowed $21.2 billion in the fourth quarter as mortgage loan demand rose $2.3 billion to $12.3 billion.

However, despite the increase in the fourth quarter, on an annual basis, household credit market borrowing fell 19.5 per cent to $84.6 billion in 2018, the lowest level of borrowing since 2014.

Credit market debt, which includes consumer credit and mortgage and non-mortgage loans, totalled nearly $2.21 trillion in the fourth quarter.

Mortgage debt reached nearly $1.44 trillion, while consumer credit and non-mortgage loans combined to total $769.4 billion.

The bears should have a field day with this one…

–

From the Financial Post  on Thursday, March 14th:

“Consumer Debt Stabilizing, But Canadian Banks Face ‘Significant’ Risk If Economy Goes South, Moody’s Warns”

Here’s a different media outlet’s interpretation of the debt-to-income ratios announced last week, with this Financial Post article concluding that the debt to income ratio had “levelled off.”

Of course, they also noted that the amount borrowed and the way it’s borrowed is concerning.

Interesting from this article was a note about auto loans; something I had yet to hear about until now:

There are also signs that some consumers, facing higher mortgage costs, are agreeing to “longer term manufacturer-subsidized auto loans” with lower payments.

“As vehicles depreciate each year, longer-term loans result in higher rates of ‘negative equity’ where the value of the vehicle is less than the amount of loan principal,” the report says.

This article mentioned that the share of the “Big Six” banks had fallen, with one particular bank’s share increasing at a notable rate:

The Canadian arm of HSBC Holdings Plc, have managed to grow their share of the mortgage market to 6.4 per cent in 2018 from 5.4 per cent in 2016.

–

From the Globe & Mail on Thursday, March 14th:

“Many Canadians Say They’ll Have To Tap RRSP’s, Take Second Mortgages, Sell Assets As Debt Burden Rises”

I spent $120 on chicken on Saturday for no apparent reason.

I went to Loblaws to pick up strawberries, milk, and eggs, as per my wife’s request, but I noticed that chicken was on an insane sale; something like $7/KG.  That’s basically $10 for a pack with five massive chicken breasts, which, if you’re picking up on the way home from work one day at any grocery store is likely going to be priced around $22.

So I picked up $120 worth, took it home, put six chicken breasts in each Ziploc bag, and placed them in my freezer like it were a file cabinet for meat.  My wife makes me dinner on Monday night with enough for Tuesday, and on Wednesday night with enough for Thursday, every week, and chicken is a staple of that diet.  This cost savings was a no brainer, as was the eight minutes it took for me to shuffle the meat into my freezer.

I have had both friends and family call me “cheap” before, but I think it’s the very definition of frugality.

As 2019 rolls on, I wonder more and more if financial accountability, ie. one’s personal responsibility for his or her own financial situation, has completely fallen off in the last half-decade.  Too many parents are buying their children $300 hockey sticks when the kids would do just fine with $30 versions.  Too many cleaning ladies feel as though they need the new iPhone.

Sorry if that sounds rude, but I’ve always felt that truth and common sense should trump sensitivity and potential to be offended, although I don’t know if that plays well in today’s society.

I sell real estate for a living, so call me biased when I think that buying a home for you or your family is more important, and a better investment, than consumables.  Expensive dinners, brand-name clothing, and sporting/music events – most of which people can’t afford.

Every time I check Instagram I see that so-and-so is out at the Leafs game, or down in Punta Cana, or out at some la-de-da restaurant that will be the envy of everybody in the know.

OF COURSE Canadians are taking second mortgages, selling assets, and tapping into RRSP’s.  Nobody saves anymore!  Nobody thinks about money or the future, or has a financial plan.

Sidebar here, but Rob Carrick wrote a brilliant article last week called, “It’s Time To Stop Pretending RRSP’s Are A Universal Retirement Savings”

You won’t believe this, or, perhaps you will…

Statistics Canada numbers show RRSP contributions grew by 2.6 per cent annually to $40.4-billion between 2005 and 2016, the most recent year for which there is data. This isn’t a mind-blowing number, but it’s much ahead of the average 1.7-per-cent inflation rate for that period.

The census of who’s actually contributing this money is where you see the real story in RRSP contribution patterns:people aged 25 to 34 fell to 11 per cent of contributors in 2016 from 14 per cent in 2005;

35- to 44-year-olds fell to 19 per cent from 26 per cent; 45- to 54-year-olds fell to 28 per cent from 32 per cent; 55- to 64-year-olds surged to 31 per cent from 23 per cent; people 65 or older jumped to 9 per cent from 4 per cent.

–

From Better Dwelling on Monday, March 11th:

“Canadian Real Estate Developer Debt Hits An All Time High”

Have you ever wondered how these condominium projects are built?

I’m sure the naive and/or uninterested folks out there simply assume that some “billionaire” buys a plot of land and constructs a condo, all while eating caviar on a yacht.  But most of the readers know that the banks finance these projects, and much of the time, the builders don’t have a whole lot of skin in the game.

Of course, it’s also possible that developments could be financed by syndicated mortgages, but we found out last December that Fortress Developments was a sham all along.

This article from Better Dwelling puts accurate numbers to the speculative nature of real estate financing in Canada.  This is really great stuff:

Canadian real estate developers are pushing their debt capacity to new highs. Bank of Canada (BoC) numbers show developers racked up a new record high at for credit at chartered banks in Q4 2018. Debt levels for developers are almost three-quarters higher than previous peaks.

Canadian real estate developers have borrowed a new all-time record. The balance of loans at chartered banks reached $16.68 billion in Q4 2018, up 2.36% from the quarter prior. This represents a massive 20.28% climb when compared to the same month last year. The previous record was a quarter before, which topped the Q4 2016 high.

Later in the article, we’re told in massive bold text: “Canadian developers borrowed over 70% more to fund this boom”

To appreciate how much money developers borrowed from banks, you need to look at past peaks. The 2008 peak was only 1.11% larger than the peak reached in the previous building boom in 1992. It wasn’t until 2013 when the current trend breached that level for good. In the most recent quarter of Q4 2018, we’re 72.3% higher than 2013 levels. It’s a lot of leverage for the peak cycle this time around.

–

Well, that’s a lot of reading for a Monday, if you take my advice and bookmark those links.

It’s also a lot of cynicism, but I can’t help it.

You regular TRB readers are far smarter than the average bear (in the Yogi sense, not financial market sense), and maybe you’re nicer, quieter, and humbler than me, but I really do think that most of society out there today has a “YOLO” mentality, and they’re busy living today with very little regard for tomorrow.

Financial literacy was a huge topic on this blog in 2018, and it will continue to be as we move forward.

So much of the debt out there today is unnecessary.

But does that even matter in the context of conversations about debt-to-income, interest rates, the real estate market, et al?

Have we actually surpassed the time to discuss financial accountability?  Is that how far we’ve come?

The post Everybody Wants To Talk About DEBT! appeared first on Toronto Realty Blog.

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[dorothydelgadillo]

3 Lessons to Learn from the Slack Rebranding Controversy

“Dude, I ‘Slacked’ that to you earlier.”

Sound familiar? Unless you are still woefully morning the loss of AIM, you’re likely using Slack at work.

Having launched in 2013, Slack is a collaboration hub for work. Allowing people to work together more efficiently by keeping conversations, files, and to-do lists in a single app that operates across desktop and mobile.

We use it here at IMPACT, and quite frankly, our remote culture depends on it.

At the end of January, Slack introduced a major change. Gasp!

They decided to redesign their logo, and users around the globe were less than satisfied with the results.

I mean really, who actually likes change?

But, in most cases, the reactions went beyond not liking a little change.

There were the comparisons:

Clippy how you have changed. #slacklogo #slackbot #clippy pic.twitter.com/ra5vCQ5OOr

— Nate Schloesser (@nateschloesser) January 17, 2019

We all love ducks! 🐣🐥🦆 #slacklogo #slack pic.twitter.com/IhVlkyTg9a

— Dan (@Betraydan) January 17, 2019

wow, love the new slack logo pic.twitter.com/s0pf0AHsju

— Chris Warriner (@King_Darian) March 1, 2019

And then, the really bad comparisons:

... pic.twitter.com/cQAOH37RE7

— Christian Dakota (@codydohertyy) January 16, 2019

Yeah...that’s a little rough. But, as it goes with logo design, once you see it, you often can’t unsee it.

Finally, there were the unoriginal accusations:

Let’s play that fun new game: “Is it the new Slack logo or a random medical group?”#branding #slack #logo #design pic.twitter.com/a4RldEJRO1

— Christopher Grande (@chrisgrande) January 16, 2019

@SlackHQ #slacklogo Updated Again 🎉 But now it looks quite familiar 🙃 😄https://t.co/4SipOqCcLA pic.twitter.com/9GDXr8UBu5

— MiniCreo (@MiniCreo_Apps) March 1, 2019

I don’t know what all the fuss is about. Personally I love Slack’s fresh, unique, never-been-seen-before logo update… pic.twitter.com/tpFc9PuPGk

— Ryan (@thisisryanon) January 17, 2019

But, to their defense, Slack isn’t the only brand to ever find themselves at the wrong end of the Twittersphere.

Airbnb went through a similar social situation in 2014.

I can't get over @Airbnb's logo looking like a clinic for women's health. pic.twitter.com/fAFbrQ0dYx

— Simone Giertz (@SimoneGiertz) September 21, 2016

As did Uber in 2016.

Aww, Uber killed off its iconic butthole logo. RIP in peace little butt https://t.co/qFkFjWwRQD pic.twitter.com/LBdqacSCwR

— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) September 12, 2018

While some of these examples are pretty funny (come on, your 15-year-old self knows they are), others raise serious social and emotional concerns.

It proves the point that everyone can always relate a logo to something.

With that said, there are some key takeaways with Slack’s rebrand that we should all take into consideration next time we find ourselves in the same seat.

1. Have a Reason for the Redesign

This might seem obvious, but trust me when I say it’s not. Sometimes we see clients who are just bored of looking at their logo, and they want someone with creative inclinations to work their magic.

That’s never, ever a good idea.

Slack actually didn't do that. They had practical reasons behind their decision to redesign. In other words, they got this part very, very right.

Excessive Restrictions

Slack knew that their existing logo, though liked, was simply not doing the job they wanted it to.

Their first logo was created before the company launched. It was distinct, fun, and the octothorpe (a fancy name for pound sign or  “hashtag”) mirrored the character users saw when creating a channel.

But, they quickly found that they made it too complicated.

The logo was 11 different colors (holy crap! Can you imagine trying to embroider that, or do any kind of offset printing?!?).  Plus, if it was placed on any color other than white, it looked horrid, failing to contrast.

The logo also had a very specific 18º rotation.

Talk about a brand standards nightmare. I honestly don’t understand how they dealt with it for so many years.

To compensate for these difficulties, Slack developed multiple versions of the logo that worked for very different purposes.

But, this meant that every single version of their app button was different, and, each one was different from the actual foundational logo. What? Kind of defeats the point of having a logo in the first place.

With any type of brand cohesion out the window subsequent designs for the brand suffered. There wasn’t a single, recognizable style that represented Slack.

A redesign seemed like the only solution.

Having recognized and understood the visual mistakes their brand was making, Slack commissioned help from the team at Pentagram, who helped bring their new visual identity to life.

Now, I’m not saying if I endorse the new visual identity, but given the parameters listed above, Pentagram delivered.

Pentagram describes the process in a case study on their website:

“Derived from the original logo and built on a grid, the new octothorpe is comprised of two basic geometric shapes––a speech bubble and lozenge––that can be extracted and used as graphic elements. The speech bubble evokes communication and connectivity, and will form the basis of a system of customized icons, illustrations and motifs with rounded corners that echo the shapes of the logo. The new octothorpe can scale up or down to optimize legibility at various sizes.”

Visual problem = solved. That makes any designer’s heart happy.

The Brand & Company Is Evolving

Every brand goes through evolutions, sometimes those happen naturally as culture and core values progress with the changing environment. Sometimes, these evolutions happen at a specific crossroads.

For Slack, it’s the latter.

Slack is planning a direct IPO in 2019.

Visually, it’s time to stop messing around with 11 troublesome colors on an 18º rotation. It was time to get serious and step up to the plate with a recognizable logomark that can be taken seriously by investors.

When your company goes public, it enters a new tier. Your name becomes known even outside of your users and your logo has to age well.

Did Slack’s hashtag really have a 10-year shelf-life? Or maybe even longer?

Does the new mark have the potential for a 50-year heritage?

While that question has yet to be answered, it is clear that some sort of change was needed.

2. Consider Your Audience

Now, here’s where things start to get a little fuzzy. Slack’s redesign also teaches us a lot about considering your audience during a rebrand.

Yes, the new logo solves a lot of problems Slack was having with their visual identity and, it certainly helps mature the brand in the eyes of investors, but what about its users and prospects?

Here’s where they missed the mark.

Desktop & Mobile Experience

The response from Slack users was HUGE.

All of a sudden, on February 26, they had new icons across their desktops and mobile devices and it was hard to find.

We went from a very bright, argyle patterned app to one that primarily used aubergine with some small colored icons.

I used to have a desktop app that was clearly legible and distinct in my Mac’s dock. After the redesign, it became one that barely stands out unless I have a notification bubble sitting on top.

Even worse, just a few short weeks after the unveiling of the rebrand, Slack decided to switch up its look on mobile, making it difficult to differentiate from apps like Google Photos and iPhoto.

As an avid Slack mobile app user, it’s incredibly frustrating that a once distinctive app is getting lost in my “messengers” folder along with the likes of Google Hangouts and Facebook Messenger.

As it currently stands, these extremely familiar app colors are almost lost on the aubergine background. It blends into the background of my dock, barely noticeable between my Creative Cloud apps. If it weren’t for the notification bubble, I might not even notice it was there.

The jury is out on whether these changes went through user testing groups, but they absolutely should have. At the very least, the implementation of the desktop app design could have better highlighted the new logo.

Unexpected Connotations

So, some of the tweets above were pretty harsh. 

In fact, a number of people were downright offended by the imagery, suggesting that the white space of the new logo resembled a swastika.

Were they wrong? Absolutely not.

Colors and symbols have different meanings in different cultures and contexts and even if you personally do not see it that way, it does not stop others from doing it.

Again, I can’t confirm that Slack didn’t do their due diligence when it came to testing the new logo, but outcomes like this show the importance of doing so.

As a brand, you need to take into account how your symbolism can be perceived by everyone in your audience.  

  As a Designer & Brand, What Can You Do?

It’s 2019.

As a graphic designer placed in charge of visually representing a brand, you have to consider how every angle of your design is representing that brand, and what this imagery could mean in terms of backlash.

Misinformation and harassment are front and center. Gone are the days of keeping your opinions to yourself, tucked away in forums, or on a small personal website.

Slack’s logo launch endured all of it. The good, the bad, and the downright ugly.

Again, part of the strategy for any public facing brand needs to be considering how the imagery associated with that brand (as unintentional as it may be) could be misinterpreted.  No matter how good your intentions, things today can be twisted into something hideous or hateful.

As a designer can you prepare for and control how each individual interprets your work?

Of course not, but you can take some steps to try and prevent it.

Think about submitting your imagery to test panels to essentially rip it apart.

If you want to know what the Twitterverse is going to do with a potentially unsavory mark, test it. At the very least, you can prepare your teams for the potential backlash and plan on how to address these types of opinions.

This test-first mentality can help you stand strong as Slack did, as opposed to a situation like Gap, where they pulled their rebrand in the first week.

3. Pay Attention to Competition & Differentiation

One of the key components of any redesign is the ability to bring originality to a brand.

A logo should be clean, replicable, identifiable, and like nothing you’ve ever experienced before.

At least, that’s the dream.

Unfortunately, reality is a bit more complicated. Hear me out.

One of the biggest areas of backlash Slack endured was their inability to be totally original.

The new logo was compared to medical groups, other tech startups, and some of the most familiar apps on our phones (Google Photos, iPhoto, etc.).

Differentiation is important, but, from a design perspective, the lack of it may have been very intentional.

People are largely attracted to what is familiar. That’s why UX on different websites, for instance, can start to look and feel eerily similar.

But, that’s actually a really good thing.

Users know exactly how to use a familiar site. It lowers friction and makes navigating easier.

Logo design trends in a similar direction.

For example, ever since Apple decided to ditch skeuomorphism for flat design around 2013, the majority of logo and app designs have followed.

In 2019, there is hardly a logo out there that hasn’t been strategically decluttered, simplified, and flattened. Consequently, everyone ends up looking the same, but still different.

I usually sort my app icons by color because it's easier to look at and remember but this is just getting confusing. 🙈🙈 pic.twitter.com/vQatzi9xJA

— Noukka 🐨 (@noukkasigne) February 27, 2019

Is Slack’s logo overly inventive and groundbreaking? You can certainly make the argument that it isn’t and perhaps there should have been more effort to help it be more distinct.

However, it is likely they’ve made the decision to be on trend with their industry.

This conscious decision to blend in might be a good look in terms of a risky investment (and their IPO status), but to users, it’s just as comfortable as the rest of their home screen.

Thinking About A Rebrand?

Do it for the right reasons.

You don’t want to take on a project like this simply because you’re tired of your logo. Make sure you have concrete reasoning for a redesign.

Make sure you are partnering with an agency that understands these reasons and owns them as if they were their own reasons for the project.

That agency should not only be well-versed in design, but aware of the competition and the community that surrounds your brand.

If they have the ability to expect certain backlash or be compared to certain brands, you can own the situation and respond with unflawed reasoning to be able to uphold your decision.

Keep these questions in mind when interviewing an agency for a rebrand:

Why do you want to work with my brand? This company is going to give your brand the biggest makeover it’s ever seen. Do you trust them with scissors and your Rapunzel-length hair? Make them prove it to you.

Can you walk me through your process? Logo design is a highly collaborative process embedded with brand messaging strategy and subjective emotions. Make sure your agency of choice understand how heavily each weighs on the desired outcome and test them on how they get there.

How will you contend for my brand against my competitors? Make sure your agency of choice recognizes your competition’s tactics and understands how to apply them to your goals.

Who will be on my team? For the same reasons as question two, make sure the team pitching you is the same team that will be delivering. You’ll need to be able to trust this team with your brand. Be sure you're comfortable from the start.

What does branding mean to you? This one is tricky. There is no “right” answer here, but instead, one that feels right to you. Hint: There is a wrong answer - a logo.

So, Do You Actually Like the New Slack Logo?

That’s a tough question that’s going to come with a tough answer.

I respect the new Slack logo. As I mentioned above, it solves a very specific set of problems for the brand. In my mind, that’s a really successful redesign.

From a totally subjective, “do I like it” emotional standpoint. Eh, it could have pushed a little further. There was an opportunity to set the trend as opposed to following it. It doesn’t exceed expectations for me -- but it certainly won’t stop me from slackin’.

All images (excluding tweets) via Slack.

from Web Developers World https://www.impactbnd.com/blog/lessons-new-slack-logo-rebranding-controversy