#like you tell cishet people a character is gay/bi/trans and what's the point of reference that comes to their mind

[gender-euphowrya]

the thing with queer rep though is that even if the writer is 100% earnest in wanting to create a complex character that people can see themselves in and genuinely trying to make them a good and accurate representation of real life queer people, cishet people still think they're a punchline

[rainesol]

TWST Main Cast Pride Headcanons!!!

Compiling all of my personal twst gender/sexuality headcanons into one post 💪

Disclaimer: I won’t bother with a DNI, however I won’t indulge any discourse or homo/trans/aphobia on this post. You will be blocked and promptly clowned on in the group chat. o7

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts:

Riddle is an interesting character to me. I don’t think he’s the type to put a label onto his sexuality, but I headcanon bi with a female preference. Gender identity wise, I think within the current storyline he is satisfied with he/him pronouns. Best way to put it into words is that I think he’s nonbinary and uses he/him, but doesn’t have a label for that either. After finding out the custom, he always introduces himself and gives his pronouns.

I choose to interpret his line about enjoying the way his heels click as gender euphoria that just went unrecognised. At the time that I’m writing this, the Lost In The Book event isn’t out on en, but through this translation, you can see that any problems he had with the outfit came from the amount of skin shown rather than the actual presentation. I wholeheartedly believe that if he had been magical-girled into a sundress he’d have been totally cool with it.

As an extra note, I’ve seen a couple of transfem Riddle headcanons that I love. I’d love to see more fics with that concept in the fandom. Or I could do it myself lol.

Ace Trappola:

We know that Ace has canonically had a girlfriend in the past, and found her boring. Not nice. He also says that he decided that dating was a pain and he prefers just hanging out with his friends. I get it. I’m aroace and I’ve confessed that I’m biased and projecting 😔 But like. Come on. I’m choosing to interpret him as aromantic/arospec. Let me cling on to the representation that I made up in my head. I don’t have any specific gender headcanons on this guy. I just view him as cis. He/him.

Deuce Spade:

Deuce is another guy I don’t have much for </3 I usually view him as a gay man in my head? He/him pronouns, cisgender. I think he’s surprisingly more open to gender non-conformity than people expect of him, though. (For instance, the ballet lessons.)

Cater Diamond:

It’s canon in the jp server that Cater has interest in dating both men and women. I’m with everyone else in viewing him as canon bisexual. I headcanon him as having a male preference, but sometimes that changes.

It’s obvious what I’ll say about his gender, but for sure under the nonbinary umbrella. We all saw the guitar strap. Maybe demiboy? He/they. Cater is very online, and considering that the nonbinary flag is ten years old, he or his elder sisters might remember its creation.

Anyways, here’s the nonbinary flag colour picked from his club groovy, and the bisexual flag picked from his Halloween groovy! :D

Trey Clover:

Trey is typically a cis dude in my head. (He/him) He's the supportive older brother type, so I imagine that he keeps the Heartslabyul public bathrooms stocked on pads. I don't know how helpful he would be with advice, but he'll hear you out or refer you to the guidance councillor if that's what you want o7 I don't think the NRC guidance councillors are much help though. Maybe just speak to your homeroom teacher.

I hc that Trey likes men and women with no preference, but just isn't very vocal about it. It'll come up in casual conversation, but I don't think he'd see the point in telling someone unless it was relevant. You'd be having a casual convo with him in the common room, and he might make a reference to a guy he had a crush on in secondary school. Cue SnapCube 'Woah, he's bisexual, I didn't know that!'

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar:

I've seen so many 'token cishet' Leona headcanons that I cant help but to absorb it a little. I do have another headcanon that he experiences some same-sex attraction, but he's got such high standards that he rarely notices any attraction at all. He/him. Maybe poly cause lions?

Jack Howl:

MLM demisexual/romantic truther. (He/him or he/they) I don't have many headcanons for the Savanaclaw trio <//3 if you see/make any please feel free to tag me!! I love reading I love information I love headcanons‼️

Ruggie Bucchi:

Either transmasc or the personification of the 'I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc about that rn'. I usually picture him with He/him or he/they. Perhaps a rare they/them if you so desire.

Pansexual, his only preference is hard workers on their grind 💪 Between you both you could create an empire of part-time jobs. I've also seen one or two poly headcanons with him that I enjoy. Dividing the bills between the whole polycule lads come on. We're eating good this week.

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto:

I cannot lie, I don't have anything on this guy. There's nothing to be said yk. Like, he's just there in my head and there's not much else I can add. I tend to agree with the MLM headcanons. I also picture him as demisexual/romantic sometimes. Not always. He's the best in the school at remembering pronouns. He updates his secret file on you right away.

Gender wise, I always just enjoy whatever the fanartist/fic writer shows me. I default to he/him. Ursula was based on a drag queen! I think that there should be post-canon/book 3 Azul drag personas. Now I'm picturing a drag design. She/her/he/him for that.

Floyd Leech:

Asexual and panromantic. I think Floyd uses any pronouns, depending on his mood. I headcanon genderfluid, but he typically keeps near the masc end of the spectrum. Not always. The basketball club made colour-coordinated bracelets so that they can easily tell whenever Floyd's preferences have changed. Blue for he/him, pink for she/her, yellow for they/them. Open for combinations of those three, and no bracelets for when he has no preference :D

Jade Leech:

Asexual and gay. I headcanon that he always introduces himself with he/him pronouns, but at the same time I picture him being cool with any pronouns. In classic Jade fashion, he will be generally unnerving about your choice. Like 'Oh? Is that your choice? ...Fascinating :)'

Scarabia

Kalim Al-Asim:

I don't have many headcanons on him specifically, but he'll totally pay for your HRT. Like Trey, he and Jamil keep Scarabia stocked with menstrual products. Kalim has a LOT of siblings, so he's seen a lot of different kinds of people :D He's got a ton of older brother advice. I see him with he/him pronouns, and MLM.

Kalim is a very supportive friend. Always excited to learn new things about his you. Also, those parades he throws? I bet he's (Jamil's) organised an NRC pride event. If I had the skills and patience, I'd draw that idea. If anybody does, tag me o7 I wanna see.

Jamil Viper:

Jamil is a very well prepared man. As I mentioned above, he's the one that puts Kalim's plans into action. He keeps Scarabia stocked on everything, he's technically still an older brother, but I don't see him as having that dynamic with anyone other than his sister. He's still a supportive friend, though :D

I headcanon Jamil as bi, usually with he/him pronouns.

I once had a transfem au Jamil idea way back when I was 17, but I haven't given it much thought since. Maybe I'll bring the au back someday?

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit:

Vil has A LOT of headcanons, theories and interpretations in the fandom. Vil is canonically a very gender nonconforming character, using typically gender neutral pronouns, being comfortable in his gender identity and presentation, and is very open to wider interpretations of gender outside of what is stereotypically considered 'masculine' or 'feminine'.

Surprisingly, I've got no proper headcanons on a set gender identity for him. There's already so much canon info within the series, that I just haven't given it much thought. I think he defaults to he/him pronouns, but is perfectly comfortable with anything. Keeps Pomefiore stocked and educated, and he's very well taught in makeup that can make you appear feminine OR masculine.

Similarly, I don't really have any label-specific headcanons for his sexuality. I normally interpret him as MLM. Vil is one of the characters that I'm always interested to see discussions about. His views on gender identity are pretty refreshing to see in modern media.

Epel Felmier:

Epel my friend! Another character that I like reading interpretations of. Again, I always give him he/him pronouns. He also had a lot of canon information on his views of gender norms. His character arc is honestly one of my favourites.

I typically picture that he’s attracted to multiple genders. I’ve seen a lot of interpretations where he mistakes his attraction for jealousy. A lot of “do I want to date him or be him?”

Another au/headcanon I’ve seen a lot of is transmasc Epel. I know a lot of transmasc people see themselves in him. That’s awesome.

Rook Hunt:

This guy! I see him as pansexual but also on the aromantic spectrum. Hear me out. In his suitor suit he has one (1) singular line about not being ready for marriage yet. Like obviously, he’s eighteen, but it just made the projecting side of my brain whir. I now see him as the type to like the idea of romance, just not for himself. Doesn’t mean that I don’t like seeing art/ships that go against this, but that is a hc I hold dear now.

He/him pronouns, but this guy loves to discuss peoples gender identity and interpretations of gender. Sit down with him and a cup of tea, and he’ll listen and talk for hours about how you both feel. Be warned that he may take notes. Mirror pronouns Rook? Oh wait. I like that. Mirror. Like Snow White.

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud:

I typically see Idia as aroace with either little or no attraction. I like the headcanon that he doesn’t date at all, but I’ve also seen enough Silver x Idia to have another set of headcanons. I like both :D I’ve never seen him as not aroace though.

I do kind of wish I had his Suitor Suit sometimes. Every other line is something I’ve definitely said before. Like, the only time he shows any interest in dating is through video games and manga with characters that aren’t him. That’s so me irl you guys don’t understand. I would die happy if twst had canon aro/ace rep.

I think Idia’s the type to only use different pronouns online. Maybe with Ortho, too. He/they online and with close family. Everyone else knows him as he/him. I said that Cater might remember the nonbinary flag’s creation. Idia does. He was on twst tumblr to witness the creation of many flags.

Here's the aroace flag picked from the Suitor Suit card! :D Very pretty.

Ortho Shroud:

Ortho is downright fascinating to pick apart. Pre book 6, I doubt Idia programmed a sexuality into him. Like it would even be possible. Then post book 6, after he gains a soul/sentience, I think he and Idia would have had a talk about him now having the choice to one day explore his gender identity and orientation (if he so desires). I think Ortho wouldn’t have any interest in dating, though.

Confessional time. Before wiring this I had the random thought of “In second year Ortho downloads she/they.zip and gets a new body made”. I never meant to pay much kind to it but now I can’t let it go. Like I’ve been accidentally referring to Ortho as she in front of friends. I have a future design in mind. I have additional headcanons about this design. It’s completely taken over. If I ever post that redesign is beyond me but it’s there in my head and it won’t leave. Fem!Ortho future au. Idk if anyone would hear me out there.

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia:

Another character I enjoy multiple interpretations of. One interpretation I have of him is cupiosexual/romantic. The other is demisexual/panromantic. Either way, the concept of a qpr would make him so excited that it doesn’t rain for days on Sage’s Island. The grass withered.

Malleus is old. Not mentally, but chronologically. He’s seen language change a couple of times, and he grew up with people even older than him. He was born in the mid 1800s equivalent. Thon is one letter off of thorn. See where I’m headed? The use of thon/thons was first recorded in the 1850’s. Gender neutrality is not a new concept to him.

If you asked for his pronouns, I feel like he wouldn’t immediately understand. Like, he calls himself I. Me. Sometimes if he’s with someone we. Did you want all of those too? Oh, just the ones you call him./j

Anyways twisted wokeland au where Malleus allows Yuu to make up a name and set of pronouns for him because he refused to introduce himself/j

Silver:

Another guy I never considered. Mayybe also on the aroace spectrum? I think he’d be happy in a qpr. I think he’s not the type to question it. He just goes with whatever he feels. I’ve not got much lol.

Sebek Zigvolt:

Demisexual/romantic and he/him pronouns. Again, I’ve not thought much on him. I think it takes him a long, long journey of self-discovery though.

Lilia Vanrouge:

Again, Lilia was born a LONG time ago. He was born in the early to mid 1300s equivalent. He’s seen so much change since then, and he’s been through a lot of character arcs. I think I’m justified in headcanoning him as an unlabelled king. If he likes a girl, awesome. He likes a guy? Cool. I think it’s common to hear him refer to himself in a dead language. Baby girl, he has heard pronouns you could not comprehend.

If you ask his gender or sexuality, you’ll get some vague dad gestures, and a ‘you know what I mean’ nod. You don’t. You won’t.

Book 7 spoilers, but I hope that they keep the mlm implications in for the en translations. They’ll probably pull a Cater and write out the canon bi implications though. Heartbroken.

⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Thank you for reading to the end of my ramblings o7 If anyone else makes pride themed posts please feel free to tag me!! I would love to see them!

I really like the subtle ways these things are portrayed in the story. Especially within the world building. We know that is generally societally acceptable for men to wear makeup and dresses in TWST, and there’s canon development of language changing over time in a gender neutral way! (Witches and wizards -> mages. Suck on that, Rowling.)

⋆｡𖦹°‧★

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@tixdixl @cyanide-latte @the-trinket-witch @thehollowwriter @elenauaurs

@emiensr

[oumakokichi]

I have a question for you about your opinions of Kaito. I've seen that you say he's homophobic and all that, but there is something about that statement that really bothers me. In his Love Suit Event, it heavily implies that Kaito not only has romantic feelings towards a very clear male rival, but also wants to win the plane race to earn the right to confess those romantic feelings. A lot of people see him as gay or bi coded, so I thought I'd ask what you thought about that.

I’ve been thinking about how to reply to this ask for a little while now, and I think I’ve finally got my thoughts all laid out. This isn’t meta, but my response will nonetheless be somewhat long, so I’ll be putting most of it under a read-more.

Anon, I’m really not sure what to tell you. Me saying that Momota has homophobic lines and behavior isn’t just my interpretation or opinion; it’s an actual fact that he does say homophobic/transphobic slurs in the game. Not in his FTEs, not in his love hotel or salmon mode, but in chapter 2 of the actual game, directed specifically at Korekiyo. The word specifically is “okama” (オカマ), and it has a very heavy and unfortunate history as a slur in Japan used predominantly against gay men and trans women, who as I’ve stated, are unfortunately often lumped together and assumed to be “the same thing” by cishet people.

I’ve had people spread misinformation about this slur, claiming that he used it in the chapter 3 trial instead and that that’s why he was being so derogatory to Korekiyo instead, but this is factually untrue. He uses this slur in chapter 2, well before Korekiyo murders anyone and before he’s revealed to be incestuous and a serial killer. And even if it were true, trying to justify the usage of homophobic and transphobic slurs with “well the person he was saying them to was a bad person so it’s okay” is a fundamentally flawed way of thinking.

It’s also a fact that he reacts with complete disgust and is horrified by even the idea of Saihara potentially coming on to him during one of his dates in salmon mode. He specifically says, “you don’t swing that way, do you!?” while using his most horrified sprite, and unlike the slur, the localization did more or less keep this line.

Again, there have been people who have tried to argue that this was simply because Momota was “sad at the idea of Saihara coming out without telling him first,” and again, this is factually untrue. Both the localization and the original Japanese dialogue of the game make it explicitly clear that he is completely grossed out at the idea of Saihara being attracted to him. This isn’t my personal interpretation or anything like that; it’s quite literally in the text.

I went and reread Momota’s love hotel to refresh my memory of the scene, and... I’m really not sure where you’re getting that he’s referring to a “very clear male rival.” He is certainly referring to a rival as his “ideal romantic partner,” but he never says anything at all about said rival’s gender. There’s absolutely nothing in the scene itself that ever specifies that he’s seeing Saihara as another guy.

In fact, for all that he talks quite enthusiastically about his rivalry with this person, he never once says any of his usual lines about “a man’s passion” or lectures about the way “men should behave.” Considering a good part of his interactions with most of the other male characters in ndrv3, not just Saihara, often involve him talking about what is or isn’t appropriate for a man (Hoshi’s suicidal tendencies are “effeminate” and unfitting for someone he looked up to, Gonta crying in the investigations is “unmanly,” etc.), I would actually say that it’s more likely he isn’t talking to another guy here, but this is just my speculation and it’s open to interpretation if nothing else.

However, it is a fact that just because Saihara is playing the part of his rival in his love hotel scene does not automatically mean that said rival “must be a guy.” Saihara plays the part of literally everyone’s ideal romantic partner in every single love hotel scene, and in most of them he’s very clearly being perceived differently than he actually appears. Hoshi, for example, is pretty clearly seeing Saihara through the lens of his dead girlfriend who he mentions in his FTEs, despite not ever explicitly referring to Saihara in his love hotel event as a man or a woman.

There’s no denying that Momota’s idea of romance is linked with passionate ideas about rivalry and competition, and that he likes grand gestures. But again, there is nothing in the text whatsoever about his rival being another man. That part is purely speculation, and nothing in the actual love hotel scene ever states that.

In my own opinion, I cannot agree with saying that a character who canonically uses homophobic slurs and reacts with open disgust to another guy coming on to him is “coded” to be gay or bisexual. Coding is the deliberate placement of subtle clues and details woven into the text to clue readers in that a character may be a certain sexuality or gender identity. With rare exceptions (like Mac from It’s Always Sunny, who by this point has been confirmed to be a gay man on the show), characters who use homophobic slurs aren’t usually “coded” to be gay or bi.

If anything, I feel that the trope of “homophobe who’s secretly a closeted gay man” does more harm than good to the LGBT community, implying that we’re responsible for the violence and prejudices used against ourselves. This trope also reassures other people whose prejudices and homophobia might be less outspoken that they’re not “really” showing any homophobic behavior or attitudes because they’re not outright saying slurs or showing their disgust, and leads them to assume that they’re not complicit.

I also feel that it’s worth pointing out that being a member of the LGBT community does not excuse anyone from homophobic or transphobic behavior, either. Having grown up in a highly conservative and deeply homophobic household, I understand perfectly well what it’s like to grow up closeted and repessed about your own sexuality. But brushing off the use of slurs directed at other people and saying that it’s okay because the person saying those slurs eventually came out is... not a great look, honestly. Even previously-closeted LGBT people still have to be held accountable for their behavior and for the harm they might have caused other people with their actions. There is no “free pass” for saying slurs to other people.

That being said, if people want to headcanon Momota as gay or bisexual, that’s an entirely different matter. Headcanons are separate from coding and are simply a matter of personal preference. Again, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to reclaim a character and actually show them growing from and apologizing for their past behavior. I can understand people who might relate to Momota’s better qualities, and who want to interpret his character in a positive way.

But it’s important in making these headcanons to not erase the fact that he did, canonically, say a homophobic slur, and to not speak over other LGBT people who are understandably uncomfortable with this fact. Just because the localization erased said slur entirely doesn’t change the intention of the original dialogue, and it doesn’t change the way Momota consistently reacts negatively to the idea of other men showing any sort of attraction to him that isn’t purely “bros being bros.”

I’m absolutely not trying to be harsh or dismissive here anon, and I hope I’ve been clear with that in my response. Again, if other people want to headcanon him as gay or bisexual because they love or relate to his character and want to see him grow from his flaws, that’s totally fine! But he’s in no way deliberately “coded” to be gay or bisexual when there are multiple instances of him having homophobic behavior in the actual, canon text.

[nomattertheoceans]

I feel like I picked up on most of the racist tropes in Maas’ books but I’d love to hear your thoughts on the homophobia in them

Hi Non!! Thanks for the ask :) 

Just an fyi if people didn’t see it, Anon is referring to my tags on this post about death of the author and the importance of criticizing media without taking into account the creator’s intent.

So yeah, regarding Maas. There’s a lot of ways in which I find her writing homophobic, I’ll divide them in different categories to try and make it clearer because my mind works in twisted ways x)

You should also know that I haven’t read Crescent City past the first few chapters so I can’t talk about this book (what I heard isn’t great regarding this issue but I haven’t read it so I won’t comment on it)

(this got long so I’m gonna use a read more)

worldbuilding

I think her worldbuilding tends to reflect a homophobia that she might not be aware of. Her entire world is built on heteronormative ... norms (lmao sorry I don’t have a better word I haven’t slept in more than 20 hours) that don’t leave any space for queer people to thrive in.

Throne of Glass actually got the less awful bit on this one, we’re shown that Hasar’s girlfriend Renia would become Empress if Hasar was crowned, and Aelin’s uncle was openly gay, so I guess compared to ACOTAR it’s better.

ACOTAR gets the worst of this: The fae society is painfully mysoginistic and by extend, homophobic. Mor is basically sold into marriage at sixteen, to a man, without regards of how she feels about it, because women are considered a breeding stock. The Illyrian women are viewed in the same light. Even Feyre is expected to be making heirs when she’s about to marry Tamlin. Yes, all these examples are painted as bad things in the books, but it doesn’t take away the fact that there are also considered normal within the society we are presented with. When the entire world is built around cishet dynamics (whether good or bad), it shows us that queer relationships are not the norm here, they’re outsiders from their own society (btw considering women as ‘baby makers’ is also transphobic but I’m not gonna open that can of worms).

The mating bond in itself is the biggest heteronormative concept in her books. As Rhys explains it in ACOMAF, it is literally intended for couples to make the strongest babies. It doesn’t care about love between partners, its primary goal is to perpetuate the species. It’s a natural instinct that we’re shown is basically impossible (or at least very difficult) to fight against. We’re shown that the woman has to make the man a meal to “seal the deal”, we’re shown that men become extremely violent towards other men they consider a threat when they’re influenced by the bond (by the way that’s toxic masculinity but it’s not what this post is about).

I believe that Maas didn’t intend for the mating bond to be a possibility between mlm or wlw couples, but that she retconned it in ACOWAR. Which in a sense is good, I’m all for queer soulmates! But the concept she invented here doesn’t have much room for non heteronormative relationships, and it becomes painfully obvious when you try to apply the mating bond logic to wlw/mlm couples. It brings many questions to mind: if it’s intended to make babies, does it mean that the mated mlm couple has one of the men be a trans man? If that’s the case, why didn’t she tell us? Why didn’t she spend more time on telling us their story? If they’re both cis men, then why would they have a mating bond, something specifically designed to help with species continuity by making babies? To me, it’s proof that she didn’t think it through, she thought it was cute to have two men be mates just like our main couple was, and didn’t stop to consider how the mating bond didn’t allow for this to happen organically because it exists in a vaccum of cishet privilege where she didn’t think about the consequences of including it in her books without elaborating on it. 

We can also see that queer people aren’t expected to be the norm in that society. Feyre is genuinely surprised when Mor tells her that she likes women, as if it was this groundbreaking thing she never even considered. I’m not going to get into details as to why I hate Mor’s coming out (I love Mor being a wlw but really, really, hate that scene), but the fact that she hasn’t felt comfortable enough to come out in five centuries is very telling of how unaccepting the fae society is of queer people. So yeah, there’s a queer bar where she hangs out but like... that doesn’t mean it’s accepted. One of the main reasons why queer bars started existing in the first place was to become a safe space for people to be themselves, so you know, I kinda take it as another proof of how unopen-minded the fae society actually is.

lack of queer characters

Overall, we don’t have a lot of confirmed queer characters. Off the top of my head, I can think about (of course I might forget some so that might not be 100% accurate, I haven’t read the books in a long while):

TOG: Hasar and Renia, Aedion, Orlon and Darrow

ACOTAR: Mor, Helion, Thesan, Andromache, Nephelle

Note that I’m not counting unnamed characters. I don’t consider “x’s lover” as a developped enough character to count as representation, come on.

Out of all these characters, only two of them are in the main cast of their respective series (Aedion and Mor). The others go from “mentioned” to “secondary character” at best. I’m not saying that all of her characters have to be queer, but out of such a big cast of mains, one in each series seems very little.

construction of these characters

On top of not having many characters that aren’t cishet, the characters we do have aren’t very well handled by the story.

Hasar is repeatedly described as being ugly, despite most of the other characters being described over and over as breathtakingly beautiful.

Aedion compares bisexuality to forced prostitution.

Helion is basically shown as sleeping around with everybody.

Mor’s sexuality is kept so ambiguous that there’s debate as to whether she’s actually bi, or rather a closeted lesbian.

Renia barely talks, Darrow is a jerk. Orlon, Andromache and Nephelle are figures of the past that we never meet

This is a problem mainly because of how small in numbers the queer characters are. The more diverse cast you create, the easiest it gets to avoid hurtful tropes. I wouldn’t mind Helion being a bi man sleeping around all the time if he wasn’t the only bi man in ACOTAR. Nor would I mind Mor’s tragic backstory if we had other wlw characters. By reducing her cast to such little numbers, she’s creating problems in her writing. She’s telling us that bi men sleep around and never settle down, she’s telling us that sapphic women will only get tragic stories and never find love again.

In the end, the combination of a heteronormative worldbuilding and the lack of work put into the queer characters we are given makes it impossible for me to not consider her books homophobic.

To be clear,

I don’t think Maas does this out of malice. I don’t think she’s a homophobe who hates queer people or anything. I also don’t dislike her books. They’re a fun read, and there’s a reason why ACOMAF is one of only two audiobooks I always have on my phone! Hell, I even write fanfic with her characters. But I think it’s important to be critical of her books, particularly in regards to issues such as racism, mysoginy, or homophobia.

To go back to the original post from yesterday, this is why ‘death of the author’ is an important point here. I’m not saying that Maas intended to be homophobic or that she built her world expressedly to exclude queer people. But in the end, that’s what happened, and we can’t brush off the critics of queer people and people of color just by saying “well, the author didn’t mean it that way.”

I do think that she includes queer representation only as an afterthought in her books, and it shows. Mor’s coming out was poorly handled because she didn’t consider the ramifications of it, just like the mating bond suddenly applying to queer relationships. Her societies are based on cishet white upper class America and that leaves little to no place for queer people (and people of color) to thrive in her stories. From what I see, she doesn’t seem interested in consulting with sensitivity readers over these issues, and as long as she doesn’t swallow her pride and listen to the people that are affected by it, she’s not going to get better on these points.

[transrightsjimin]

I'm asking as a confused trans and gay person regarding some of your recent posts saying aphobia doesn't exist, etc. Do you consider asexual people to be inherently LGBT even if they are cisgender and straight (heteroromantic)? I don't want to discriminate at all, I'm just confused because I see people fighting on here all the time about whether aces are part of the LGBT community or not. Do you have some insight for me as an ace nonbinary person? Thanks in advance!

no it’s fine lol dw!

i’m not sure how to explain this w/o being too extensive in what i say bc i’ve talked about this before but more in private conversations (and maybe some rants in tumblr posts) nd i tend to ramble abt it.

first of all i do not actually like the common conception that there is one way to define LGBT or the idea that everyone should fall within that category term or not, for example because the English language is colonial and rigid and does not reflect on experiences of all cultures, bc being gay or trans are not distinctly different experiences everywhere while they would be divided into different categories. so whereas i was more insistent on saying ‘you must be gay / bi / lesbian / trans to be LGBT / suffer from homophobia or transphobia’ i’ve come to realize now that this argument is rather exclusive of many gender diverse identities that do not correspond to all experiences or cultures. so i will stay away from using that argument.

however, i am speaking from my experience with online LGBT and asexual communities and have seen how the latter has tried to force itself into the other. i think a large issue with the asexual and aromantic communities is that they are partially based upon the creation of AVEN, an online forum founded by a homophobic and antisemitic man, and partially (though related to the former) by just blatantly made up statistics and history. not once have i seen a good argument or research or even personal accounts that illustrate very well why aphobia is a thing. i am asexual myself but do not want to take the lack of discrimination i faced for it as proof. there have been accounts of ‘aphobic’ discrimination that are either 1. much more a general concern with the OP facing misogyny and girls being sexualized, 2. someone making a remark based on a misconception of OP’s experiences or 3. misappropriation of terms and applying them to asexuality, e.g. ‘corrective rape’ was coined to refer to (African) lesbians who were assaulted under the presumption that it would turn them straight. asexuals have appropriated this term years ago to claim asexual people face rape on a large scale because perpetrators try to force them into liking sex. some people don’t even know the original meaning of the term because of this. i’m also not a big fan of this new interpretation of the term anyway, because legit sexual attraction is not the main reasons people commit rape; it is to seek power. this kind of mindset of asexual people being inherently vulnerable to sexual violence due to lack of feeling sexual attraction is seriously harmful; in the crime show Law and Order SVU, a suspect was let off because some main character said the suspect was asexual and this couldn’t have done it. people can be and sometimes are raped by an asexual person, because it is about taking advantage of someone and not attraction. the sole fact that so many authors of overly fetishistic fanfiction are asexual should prove this much, but instead the lack of attraction is used to distance oneself from the harm one can still cause.

and yes, asexual people can face discrimination, especially if you’re a girl you’re expected to be sexually submissive, which is pretty horrifying on its own. but this is not the same as targeted discrimination on a mass scale or institutional whatsoever. we are not thaught as we grow old that asexuals are disgusting, are a joke, or need to be violently murdered. my biggest issue with the asexual and aromantic community that we (as i have removed myself from it years ago) keep telling it that anecdontal accounts of being mildly discriminated is nowhere near the same as risking being kicked out of your house, being violently attacked due to the way you appear or having a partner of the same gender, being systematically discriminated by all sorts of institutions in society and being thaught that what you are is bad from an early age on. and then the counterargument is that LGBT is more recognized but asexual and aromantic isn’t, so ‘ace / aro’ people deserve to be included because they are underrepresented in media. but that is not the case at all. the speed at which asexuality has suddenly been incorporated and included into LGBT spaces, also offline, has been ridiculously fast. nowadays when you see a bunch of LGBT flags you see the asexual one being included a lot, sometimes in 3 different versions, while the lesbian flag is nowhere to be seen. lesbians are consistently excluded from their supposedly own community and they are not included in LGBT due to a need to change underrepresentation or lack of awareness, but because they face their own version of homophobia. the most mind-boggling thing about cis / cishet asexual and aromantic people being told that they are not oppressed, is that the response is not relief (’oh i’m glad i don’t face systematic oppression for this thing’) but anger (’how dare you not let us into your group!’). LGBT is seen as a fun party that is unnecessarily mean to anyone it gatekeeps, as if it is not actually necessary to keep out cishet people who benefit from their privilege and can use that against the rest in the group if they join.

my largest issue with the asexual community however, and i’ve touched upon this a bit before in the post, is that it victimizes itself, to such a degree where it puts itself oppositional to ‘allosexuals’. the whole idea that people who experience sexual attraction to another person are inherently privileged over abd hold power over asexual people is just not true (and the same goes for this rethoric for aromantic people). this idea is so wrong and the whole concept of the ‘allosexual’ as oppressor collapses once you consider that people who are attracted to the same gender are actually in danger and oppressed for their very attraction. not only are those who experience attraction (that isnt platonic) to other people portrayed as oppressors, but also as perverted freaks. once i decided to stop associating myself with acearo people and instead interact with LGBT people with other experiences, i realized just how much stigmatizing abd frankly, homophobic and transphobic bullshit i’ve adopted within the spaces i used to be in and that i still see gather a lot of traction (now their harmful points are also used on twitter and IRL in the public domain). the community has a huge issue where it teaches you to be puzzled and grossed out by people who want to date / kiss / have sex with other people, and this results in GSAs that now include asexuals to prohibit kissing your partner per request of asexual / aromantic members, asexual people showing up at pride with ‘can we just hug?’ signs, the common serophobic jokes (’at least we dont get hiv!!’ blergh), and for me it led to a great discomfort with kissing and sex imagery and it wasn’t until i left the community that this was in fact subtle homophobia because so much content on here is lgbt themed and to combine that with the increasing aversion to romance or sex without critically looking at that is... very toxic to say the least.

so where it’s standing right now, i don’t think including asexual or aromatic people in LGBT spaces on the basis of those identities is a good idea. one community advocates for the acceptance of sex, whereas the other is stigmatizing it and painting off those who are in fact oppressed for their transness or homosexuality, as the oppressors. it clashes and it doesn’t work. the ‘ace / aro’ community (quote unquote bc i see ‘ace’ being used a lot to imply superiority over ‘allosexuals’ like, theyre being the ace at something) has too many issues, which it is largely based on, to figure out. it can be a community on its own and i do not think you need to join LGBT to have a valid identity that has something to do with sexuality or gender and deals with a form of stigma.

it woukd be a rant, i warned you lol

[aro-culture-is]

It's that time of year again- pride is coming up and I've already gotten some acephobic dogwhistles crossing my dash.

Below is a list of specifically aphobic dogwhistles that I'll update as I spot them or if you guys suggest them:

Before I begin, a definition of dogwhistles:

“Dog-whistle politics is political messaging employing coded language that appears to mean one thing to the general population but has an additional, different, or more specific resonance for a targeted subgroup. The analogy is to a dog whistle, the ultrasonic tone of which is heard by dogs but inaudible to humans.” - Wikipedia

Not everyone who uses these phrases is intending to have that additional, different, or more specific resonance for aspec people, but if I bold the item, it doesn’t have an okay meaning.

"PDA IS ALLOWED AT PRIDE!1!1!!11" - While a number of ace and aro folx (among others such as trauma survivors) do find that PDA can be triggering or a squick, I've never seen someone legitimately claim that PDA shouldn’t be allowed at pride, as these aphobes insist. Every time I've seen this sort of claim cross my dash, there's 2 things I find to be true: the original blog is acephobic (or a 13 year old and that does tend to be a pretty dumb age due to brain reasons) and there's a legitimate and oftentimes decent conversation by people in the notes about making sure that PDA during daytime events is nonsexual so that minors are safe. That discussion is ok, So are counter arguments. But, PLEASE recognize that emphatic declarations like above are a dogwhistle.

“I support LGBT aces/aros!” - yikes. So, the basic idea here is that this person believes that being ace/aro is a modification of being straight rather than a sexuality or romantic orientation or that same-sex attraction is necessary to be LGBT(Q+) which tends to be completely and immediately contradicted by a generic “but trans people are ok” or just a total LGB or even LG only. They do not actually support aspec people. They support only the letters they claim to support at best. (thanks to @clownpieceoffreedom for suggesting this addition!)

“A is for allies!!!” - not sure how much detail I need here if you’re on my page, but honestly... basically, people who say this fall into 2 main camps: 1) ignorant but trying, and haven’t yet learned enough to know that A is for asexual, aromantic, and agender folx, and 2) the asshats who know that and consider all of those identities invalid. Generally speaking, assume ignorance and evaluate the speaker via searching them, speaking with them, or other methods. 

url including “allo” (especially as “dirty/sex -allo”), “aphobic”, “-course” referencing discourse - this one is subtle, but usually a quick glance at their blog reveals their true nature. Many if not most are frankly speaking, awful and aphobic. If they are of that ilk, you’ll probably find no less than five dogwhistles on the first page. However, some aspec people have claimed these urls because their are alloromantic or allosexual and it is a term for them, among other reasons, so I would advise checking before you reach for the block button. see the section on allo/dirty for why those in particular are included.

“asexuality/aces are homophobic” - this might just be implied but I also recently made a blocklist based around a post that literally referred to aspecs as “ homophobic ace tumblr” because they believe one of the following: 1) that sex-repulsion and romance-repulsion are always referring to seeing same-sex attraction, commonly used in reference to PDA at pride while insisting that aspec people who don’t want to see romantic or sexual situations are telling them not to be gay in public. usually, the aspecs in question were just... talking about romo or sex repulsion and how they handle it because they don’t want to do that. 2) one I can’t fully wrap my head around: aces are homophobic because some gay people will identify as asexual to avoid acknowledging their gay feelings. like... bud. internalized homophobia is a bitch but it’s yours. we welcome you for as long as you’d like to stay, and if you realize that you aren’t aspec, you can feel free to hold onto it for as long as you’d like, but ultimately confronting your feelings is your business. we won’t tell you what to do as a community. if it’s homophobic to respect your feelings and allow you to decide if and when you, a random online stranger, confront your feelings, then it was aphobia when you didn’t tell me likewise to confront my internalized aphobia when I thought I was gay because I knew I wasn’t into the people I was “supposed” to be. you had no way of knowing that and neither do we.

“allo” “dirtyallo” “dirty” etc as a self description particularly with a mocking tone - for some reason a lot of allo people think allo is a poorly made slur of some sort or lumps them in with their oppressors. idk man. they think that it’s clever to use it preemptively or something. I’m not sure but I think that they think our experiences are mocking theirs somehow. it gives me the same vibes as like, those people who insist that political correctness is ruining everything. they don’t know or care to know what the term means so they decide it must be secretly insulting them. insert “i am smart” memes here.

“cishet” - ah, yes, the biggest and most annoying dogwhistle of them all. coopted by exlusionists in which they actually mean “cisgender heteroromantic aces” or more rarely “cisgender heterosexual aros” and usually makes a big point about how “cishets” are awful people who should never be allowed at pride related events etc. typically used in a way that normal blogs have no idea. this is probably the most effective aphobic dogwhistle. as for why it’s bad, see “I support LGBT ace/aros!” above.

pride collections (such as edits of a popular character with pride flags behind them) without asexual/aromantic flags, specifically ones with only LGBT flags - I totally get that not every artist is gonna make edits for every queer identity they know, but I’ve seen enough of these lead back to aphobes that I’m including it regardless. If you don’t see an identity, especially one of the Big Ones... check it out. Do a search. If you aren’t sure what I’m including, here’s an off the top of my head list, contact me for additions b/c I don’t double check what I type enough. Common: lesbian, gay, bi, pan, queer, asexual, nonbinary, trans; less common but still possibly a sign: aromantic, demi -romantic or -sexual, agender, intersex, newer variations of lesbian flags that have significant support.

[delusion-of-negation]

1 I remember recently being in a hobby battle of the gay content. And someone pointed out how a lot of the "criticism of bad gay rep" was actually just seemingly homophobia (with hints of transphobia) rebranded as "WE CARE ABOUT THE GAYS!" One was someone freaking out that women would have gay characters who're Andro or feminine presenting. Another was how horrible it was to write gay content, especially smut and the only reason given was "because they're all CISHET" yes a complete strawman

2 because the person in question was just claiming anyone with gay characters must be a cishet woman. Then there was the throwing huge tantrum that trans characters might have a pre-OP AND post-OP bodies, but they didn't even explain WHY it was bad. All of these people also "graciously" allowed gay/bi men, and trans people to create these characters, but you'd have to out yourself otherwise you'd be considered a cishet woman. I can go deeper because this thing has like 4 LVLs of bullshit -phobia

yeeeeaaaaah, I really like this youtuber called Dominic Noble, if you've not heard of him basically he does a show called Lost In Adaptation, where he just compares adaptations to their source material, to see how loyal they are, if the changes worked, what happened during the creation process to lead to those changes, and how they are as a stand alone piece. he also does reviews. apparently (and this is second hand because it was taken down before I saw it) he reviewed a gay romance novel, and critiqued whether the writer being "a woman" impacted it, unfortunately between him writing/recording the video and it being uploaded (unfortunately because of the timing, not because coming out is unfortunate at all) the writer came out as trans/enby and so he took the video down immediately. I stumbled across a great (derogatory) site called "ovarit" (geddit) that is basically a terfy message board, and they were furious. because, to them, this writer (whom they referred to exclusively with insults, such as the very imaginative "Deadname McEnby") was not, and I am quoting directly here, "An Actual Bepenised Ejaculator Who Loves Other Penis People" and they don't have experience as a "Penis-Haver" and therefore shouldn't write about gay men and it's like bruh... idk how to tell you that JKR is not a dragon or witch.

forcing people to out themselves for permission, or writing off a piece of work over just the identity of the writer, is disgusting. if Dominic initially made that critique I disagree with it even if that writer had been a woman, but he took the video down because deadnaming and misgendering someone isn't what he wants to do.

[full-course-identity]

@saddestlittlebaby-intheroom​

First off: thank you for replying. I apologize if I came off unnecessarily harsh, but frankly, I didn’t really think you were gonna be interested in talking--I mostly made that reblog for anyone else in the be m/ore chill tag who saw your post and checked the notes.

I don’t know if I’ll reply in depth anymore after this. This post is long, and took a lot out of me.

While, yeah, most people who headcannon it are trans, as someone who’s bi, the treatment of how being bi is Jeremy’s only personality trait kinda annoys me.

... well, I mean. If these are queer people, specifically queer kids, hyperfocusing on his queerness and making their content all about his queerness... maybe there’s a valid reason?

Fandom, specifically, is one of the first avenues kids today get to explore being aaaaanything but cishet. When a part of you so fucking massive that it DOES, actually, radically change your personality, gets pushed down and oppressed, you’re gonna wanna fixate on it when you get the chance to try--at least, a lot of people will. Maybe not you, and that’s fine. 

But I implore you: rethink your takeaway. Your OP directly shames the people doing this, and makes it sound like the people who do it must not truly understand transness--and considering that, again, the majority are trans, that is actively harmful. That’s my biggest issue.

(and... yes. I am using queer as an umbrella term. Queer is used as not only a community term, but an academic one, so if you’re not okay with being called queer, just tell me and I won’t refer to you as such... but I will still use it.)

I totally understand where you’re coming from, and I’m not trying to say that GNC trans men don’t exist, but it’s the way people portray them as basically just being soft trans bois with no other personality outside of being trans that annoys me. It’s not even just that, I feel the fandom basics reduces down any character to just their sexuality or their gender, and as someone who’s bi, it kinda pisses me off that people just state that such and such a character is gay, bi or trans, and then everything just becomes about that. People are more then their sexuality or gender, this is LITERALLY what the LGBT community has been fighting for for years, and now the newer generation wants to just snatch being gay or being trans as a quirky personality. 

That’s... not what we’ve been fighting for, actually. 

I’m not going to get as in depth with this as others could bc I don’t have the spoons to write up an entire essay on the problems with what you said, but, I mean, for one thing, we’ve been fighting for the right to exist. Not to prove we’re “more then our identities”--that’s not the point at all. Our identities are fine. We need to be allowed to be the people we are, and if you truly believe in a “live and let live” philosophy, you cannot shame people for prioritizing a massive part of their live experience. Being queer changes everything. It is NOT the newer generation that suddenly decided to change this; things like found families, queer communes, whole bubbles of ‘safe spaces’ hidden away from society were all the fucking rage waaaaaay before the internet came around. 

Just because what used to be hidden out of sight is now finally reaching the public at large doesn’t mean these concepts are somehow fuckin invalid.

I kinda wished I actually touched on that as well about how Jeremy and Michael are always just sad boys who cry a lot. That annoys me as well because the rest of their personalities is thrown completely out the window, just so they could cry a lot for no real reason. And as someone who literally can’t get through a day without crying, I just wanna say it’s not cute. It’s actually really fucking annoying, both for myself and everyone else.

So much of fandom is used as venting. These sad boy portrayals--why do you think they exist? Do you think the majority of the fans are romanticizing depression? Because, personally, again, I think you’re talking down to people who are literally going off their own life experiences and their own mental illness. No. Real life crying isn’t cute. Good thing this is fandom, where making characters suffer is a GREAT way to work through shit, which is the case for most of the kids who might see your post.

When I talk about ‘kink material’, I mean the whole idea of being trans has become a kink to a certain group of people. It lessens the idea that being trans is actually an important issue, just for some soft angst then can be cured with a few kisses and snuggles. So, not exactly a kink in the typical sense, but more that, again, being trans is an idea that’s meant to be ‘soft and cute’. 

‘a certain group of people‘ ... ‘just for some soft angst then can be cured with a few kisses and snuggles’

I’m guessing you’re truscum. I sorta was too, in high school. I’m not touching that specifically because it is a whole other can of worms, but I wanted to point out something.

We established most of the people talking about trans headcanons are, well, trans. Right? Okay.

So why do you think trans people somehow don’t know the harsh realities of being trans?

This is, again, fiction. Why would you assume they just don’t get it, and why are you bothered by people glossing over whatever they don’t care to talk about in fandom, where you don’t have to talk about whatever you don’t like.

The exact idea of my post was that trans people aren’t supposed to be infantilized?????

Yeah. The problem is that you were, in fact, infantalizing people.

I never stated to talk for everyone, let alone the trans community, just in my experience, the trans people I’ve talked to have been extremely uncomfortable with the portrayals specifically trans Michael and Jeremy. 

Except we are talking about trans people overwhelmingly making these headcanons. Which means the people you talk to would be outliers. But more then that... I’m sorry, but their discomfort isn’t important. Block people, block tags, move on.

I’m not saying you’re not allowed to have your portrayal, just that people kinda need to make sure that it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. 

That is 100% fine. I agree.

And no, don’t worry, I’m not going to go around attacking people for how they portray a certain character. Yeah, maybe I’ll make a post about it or whatever, but I’m not going to go around personally attacking people by tagging them in posts, commenting on their posts, direct messages, etc. 

That’s good. But I am quite bothered by you making this post on the main fandom tag, tagged a couple of different things, and made it so people would see your post. Just... if you’re gonna make a post like that, please ease up on the implications that the people who disagree with you are badly treating their own identities 

But if people are allowed to make trans Jeremy and Michael, or even just cis Jeremy and Michael, extremely soft, then I’m allowed to speak against it.

You’re allowed to discuss it, yes. I certainly don’t like some portrayals, and I’ve talked about them before, in the tag in fact. But you went way beyond discussion and into active, negative judgment of people. If you’re going to do that (trust me, I’ve had to vent some things before), please DON’T put it in the main tag, at the very least.

YKINMK.