#like you can see and feel that Six still loves and cares for Jamie. He even admits he was always fond of him

[yaminerua]

Honestly you can’t convince me that the fact that every now and then the Doctor’s regeneration returns to being Scottish isn’t just the love and fondness he still holds for Jamie McCrimmon bleeding through after all this time and manifesting that way

[danistartt]

Gentleman- Jamie Tartt

pairings: jamie tartt x reader, richmond team warnings: language. i think i read this one too many times. about: request! secret dating because reader works for Richmond (as like pr or physio or something) but when they win a match one day Jamie is so overcome with joy he just has to kiss her

“Don’t you think someone is bound to get worried you’re coming in here every day?” you wonder, pinching away individual blades of grass stuck among the fuzzy dandelions of Jamie’s socks.

“Nah,” he says, watching your careful attention from his place on the pillow. He’s feeling bad about putting his muddy shoes over your clean lap, but you haven’t complained once, only appreciating the easy access to touch him. “They don’t know I come up here.”

You look perplexed. “Where do they think you go?”

Jamie shrugs. “The loo?”

“The one not in the locker room? Six times a day for ten minutes?”

“I keep myself hydrated,” he tells you, lifting up his water bottle to wag it at you. “Y’know, to keep up appearances.”

You chuckle, pushing the web of your thumb around his ankle and trying to touch your pointer. Your phone blinks up at you, the time precarious. Your hand slackens. “You need to get back soon.”

Jamie gets that sticky feeling he does whenever he has to leave something, gross and pleading at the pit of his stomach, his every cell calling out for him to use his time better. He wants to touch you like you’re touching him. He shifts onto his elbows and stares at you. “I can be a little late.”

You frown at the idea, your hands still and warm on his calves. “No, Jamie.”

“Yes, Jamie,” he murmurs, his arms making quick succession in tugging you to him. He’s strong, he’s always been strong, but you don’t tend to notice until he’s pulling you out from beneath his legs and hugging you in a single movement.

You don’t want to encourage him but you want even less to not make your delight shown at being pressed against his chest.

The minute changes. Your care for it begins to dwindle.

“Jamie!” you squeal, not moving. 

He says your name in the same tone, as condescending as he used to be but sweetened by the kiss he presses against your hair. “C’mon, love,” he encourages, a horrid influence working.

“No,” you insist weakly. “Ted’s waiting for you. The team’s waiting for you.”

“But I’ve been waitin’ for this all day,” he complains pointedly. “Maybe I should trip o’er the ball or somethin’. Make a nice excuse to spend hours here with ya.”

“Jamie Tartt? Not believable.”

He makes a pleased noise, pressing another kiss to your forehead. “You’re right.”

Another minute. Ted’s brown eyes bore into your subconscious.

Painfully, you peel yourself off of Jamie, slotting his thighs between your own. You watch his pupils dilate from above him.

“No,” you start, gently holding his face in your hands in a plea and causing the opposite effect you’d meant to. “No time. Later.”

He grasps your coat tightly.

“I promise. Just go to practice.” You spy the time and scramble off of him. “Now.”

He groans, catching your wrist when you hurry to collect the loose strands of his hair. He holds up a hand, pinky finger outstretched, and stares in question.

You roll your eyes but hook your own through his, a grin making its way to his face. “Y’know these’re binding, right?” he asks pragmatically.

You’d taught him that. The prick. “Yes,” you say exasperatedly, trying to pull him off the couch.

“‘M goin’,” he mutters, letting you. “I’ll see you in half an hour.”

“No you will not,” you gasp. “They’re going to think you have a bladder infection.”

“I’ll make somethin’ up,” he shrugs, looking around. He picks up your keys off your desk and wags them. “Maybe you dropped your keys when you were headin’ in.”

“Jamie,” you warn. “You can’t leave the team so much because, beside the fact that they’ll notice something is up, you actually like being with them and—”

“I like you better. A lot prettier.” He closes his fingers around the keys.

You inch closer slowly,  but he’s undeterred and blows you a kiss, leaving your office with only muddy tracks left in his place before you can catch up. “Do not come by in half an hour!”

He listens to you. Kind of.

You see him a few hours later, a cocky glaze on his features, keys clicking against one another. “Hey, doc, I think ya dropped somethin’.”

You snatch them from him. “What a gentleman.”

“Right? Had to fight for it, too. Coach must really like returning keys.”

“How’d you get him to give them up?”

“I jus’ left,” he shrugs.

You gape at him. “What?”

“I told ‘im I found your keys, he said he’d give ‘em to you after practice. I said you might need ‘em now and then I just went inside ‘fore he could call Will over. I should actually be gettin’ back now, our screaming break’s probably over.” He slinks over to you and kisses your forehead, smelling like grass and sweat and lavender detergent.

“What?” you echo.

“I’ll see you later. Can you pick up some food before you get home? Kent don’t really like it when I leave the screamin’. Says it’s most effective on me.”

He smiles at you, waves, and leaves you perplexed.

You put down what he stole from you and notice vibrant pink peeking beneath metal, a green stem’s end through the ring. When you pull it out, you recognize it as one of the flowers that keep growing at the far right edge of the field. You melt into your seat, pouting at the crumpled petals.

-

“So, what’s the verdict, Doc?” Ted asks when you come out of your room, dipping a finger behind your right glove.

“He’ll be okay. He can play this week’s game as long as he doesn’t put too much pressure on his foot. I told him to ice it periodically for two days and then just make sure it isn’t swelling.”

“No permanent damage, then?”

You laugh. “No permanent damage.”

Sam pushes your door open, leaning on a crutch.

“How you feelin’, champ?” Ted asks.

Sam shrugs. “I’ve been better. At least Doctor Y/n gave me the all clear for this week.” He looks pointedly at you, as if Ted might need confirmation from you.

“Under what conditions?” you pry.

“Rest, ice, compress, and elevate,” he lists off his fingers.

“The most important for you, Mr. Obisanya, being…”

“Not being on it for two days,” he answers, ever the great student.

“I wish all my patients listened as well as you do,” you commend, letting him go with a smile.

Ted watches him go, turning back to you with a cheery expression. “Well, thank you, Doc.”

“It’s what I’m here for.” You toy with your gloves, listening to the team erupt in noise once Sam assumedly gets back.

“And also to bring a smile to all our faces. Not to say that’s a purpose. Just a nice bonus.”

You laugh. “Thank you, Ted. Is there anything else you need from me?”

He shakes his head. “Oh, no, no. Just wanted to ask if you were interested in goin’ out with the team and I tonight.”

“Where are you going?”

“Oh, just the Crown and Anchor. We haven’t officially asked ‘em yet, but one thing that doesn’t change no matter where we are is that athletes always appreciate a good drink with good company.”

“Very true,” you murmur, contemplating. You hadn’t gone out with the boys in a while and you were beginning to miss their antics. You could sit around the house for the evening, or you could spend that same evening a little drunk with your friends. “You know what? Sure. I’d love to.”

“Alrighty then!” Ted cheers, pleasantly genuine in the way no one else is. “I’ll let ‘em know. We’ll see ya later, Doc!” 

“You too, Ted!” you call after him, slumping into your chair once you’re alone. Your phone vibrates from the table, lighting up with a picture of Jamie that he’d insisted you set as his profile picture. “Hello?”

“Coach says yer coming with us tonight?”

You stare at your door. “He just left. How could he have possibly already told you that?”

“Team groupchat. He was very insistent about it an' m'honestly not that upset about it anymore.”

You laugh. “I am going. Are you?”

“Course. D’you want me to pick you up?”

“How do we explain that?”

“I’m a gentleman?”

“To this degree? Do you think they’d believe that?”

“I’ll go before. Help ya pick out your clothes, put ‘em on?”

“You’ll see me when I get there.”

“C’mon, love. I want to be the first.”

“You always are!”

“Do you really wanna risk that streak?”

“Yes.” Other voices begin to filter in, still far away but getting closer. “I’ll see you there, Jamie. I love you.”

Jamie pauses, a soft shuffling noise preceding what is clearly Jamie’s palm curving around his phone’s speaker. “I love ya, too,” he whispers. You hang up, leaning into your seat. Your phone zzpts in your hand.

send a picture. Three dots, blinking in and out. please.

Humming, you debate it before: i’ll think about it. 

-

Jamie, of course, is the first to see you.

He looks for you in every creak of the pub door, slyly craning his neck to check for the color of your hair or the burgundy coat you tend to wear on these outings. When he finally catches sight of you, he looks away, satisfied to have been the owner of the first glance.

The others spot you quickly, raising their beers in your direction. Zoereaux puts your drink in your hand, cold bubbles splashing the curve of your thumb.

You thank him, kissing his cheek in greeting as the others crowd you. “Maybe I should be worried you all know my order.”

“Absolutely not,” Ted chimes in from your other side. “Knowledge is love.” He hugs you too. “Glad you could make it, Doc.”

You push yourself onto a seat next to Jan Maas, tipping your glass at him. “You look nice,” he says.

“Thank you,” you respond. “You too.”

“Doc?” Isaac asks.

“You can call me by my name, Isaac.”

He wrinkles his nose and shakes his head. “Nah. Feels weird now.”

“Alright. What’s up?”

“My sister says thank you for the advice. Her leg’s all better now and she told me to invite you over for dinner.”

“She doesn’t have to do that.”

“She insists.”

“You should just accept,” Colin says. “She makes a good Shepherd’s pie and won’t give up.”

Isaac nods, jutting a finger in his direction.

“Of course, then. Can’t wait.”

The conversation continues, and you indulge a glance at Jamie to find him looking back at you, an inquisitive pull to his brows. Your eyebrows jump, trying to ask a question with only your features.

You pull your phone from your pocket and begin typing out a message for him when the topic somehow heads back to you.

“Hey, d’you end up going on that date?” Bumberbatch asks suddenly.

You blink. Jamie turns to him curiously. “What?”

“With the prick. You know. Coiffed hair, All puffed up.”

“Um.” You try very hard to not look at Jamie, who’s surely staring at you with wide, amused eyes. “Yes. Yes I did.”

“How’d it go?” Isaac urges. Your mouth is open with no certain words to comfort.

“Yeah. How’d the date with the prick go?” Jamie pipes up, sliced brow up. He’s awful. Truly, truly awful and he knows it.

You force a smile at him. “Not as bad as I thought.” The team mumbles in satisfaction but Jamie doesn’t give.

“Not as bad, huh?” Jamie repeats, lips thinning in thought. “I dunno.” He does a little shake of his head and licks his lips, meeting your eyes again. “Maybe it went a little better than that?”

You clear your throat, heat rising to your face though you try desperately to keep it down. 

Colin raises a brow. “Why would you say that?”

Jamie shrugs, unfairly unphased. “Just askin’.”

The attention moves off of you. You glare at him.

He smiles and, in the wake of a controversial argument between cartoons, winks at you. Your legs go weak.

-

You’re supposed to sit with the coaches during matches. Keeley had been upset at first and Rebecca sorry, offering a replacement medical professional for a game if you were so inclined to observe a game from the box seats, but you’d refused. Your place, although precarious with flying balls and the grandest source of stress, is kind to you. 

You sit behind Ted during matches. The back of his head is surprisingly comforting in the tensest points of a match, and you find you can catch the preliminary movements of his fingers when you’re nearby.

There isn’t much contorting you have to do to sprint into the field if you’re needed, and the seat itself isn’t too bad when you’re not. Also, you have a great view.

You’re close enough to feel the strength with which the players kick the ball, you’re part of the very exclusive audience to the coaches’ hope, and when he gets close enough, Jamie can hear your cheers for him very clearly.

You’re completely sure he can hear you now, shouting at the top of your lungs up front with the coaches, fists tight enough to shake. He speeds up with renewed energy, the ball a blur between fast legs and fake passes. You grasp Roy’s arm with everything in you and let your eyes move to the timer. Less than fifteen seconds to go and a tie glares in blocky red numbers.

Your fingers spark with something hot, curling tighter around Roy’s wrist when the ball is passed to Jamie.

The time goes by too slowly and the ball flies too fast, a defender slamming to the ground with his hands up as Jamie’s kick sends the ball into the net. The clock ticks for the last time. The arena erupts in sound and a combination of red and blue.

You scream, finally letting go of Roy to drag your hands to your face. Isaac and Dani embrace on the field, most of the others running toward Jamie but Jamie is sprinting toward you.

You realize too late what’s going on, too proud of Jamie, too dizzy on adrenaline and excitement to realize what’s about to happen and why it shouldn’t.

He comes up to you beaming, picking you up easily and spinning you around. You respond immediately, palms against his warm cheeks, lips pressing repeatedly against his forehead and then finally his lips. “You did so good,” you praise, hoping he can hear you even through the overwhelming noise. “I’m so proud of you.”

He grins, finally catching your lips and lowering you to the floor. It takes only two seconds for what happened to settle in. You can see it on his face, the exhilaration contorting into recognition. He finally looks away from you and gulps.

The stadium is still loud, but most of the team is looking at you, caught in differing positions of celebration. Ted stares at the both of you, jaw dropped.

“What do we do?” he whispers to you. “Do you think they’ll believe it if we say it was an accident?”

“No,” you respond just as quietly. “No, I don’t think so.”

[saiyanprincessswanie]

Made For Me - Epilogue

Series Masterlist

A/N: DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 YEARS OLD.  

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 2077

Summary: Six months later we find our reader pregnant and happy to be where she is. Or is she?

Warnings for Series: NONCON/DUBCON, Drugged NONCON, Somnophilia, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Forced Orgasms, Light Bondage, Stockholm Syndrome, Manipulation, Gaslighting, Light Physical Abuse, Breeding Kink, Cussing, Angst, Sex Toys.

A/N: Thank you to my beta reader @music-culture-mythology for helping me like usual.

Page break is by @whimsicalrogers

Moodboard by @fictional-affairs

Reblogs & Comments on Tumblr are welcomed and encouraged. 😊💜

I do NOT give my consent to have my work translated or reposted on any social media platform, apps, or third-party sites. If you see my work anywhere besides my personal Tumblr & AO3 accounts, it has been stolen. I will NEVER give written or verbal permission to repost or translate any of my fanfics as they’re MY intellectual property. 🚫🚫

Six Months Later…

Things with Bucky have finally settled into a peaceful life after that scary moment when he protected you from an unknown man in the woods. That day changed everything. You no longer see Bucky as your sadistic captor. No, he’s now your husband, your lover, and your everything. You are excited and nervous that you’re now six months pregnant with Bucky’s baby. A part of you looks back on how you got here. The memories still bother you at times but then you remember the happiness you now feel. You have a husband and a baby that’s almost here. 

As you sit outside on the porch soaking in the sun you hum to yourself, you think of the day you married your husband. It was a small ceremony with his six friends; Tony, Steve, Nat, Thor, Clint, and Bruce. It was at that moment you knew there was no going back to your former life. 

When surrounded by everyone that day you could have sworn you recognized Thor from somewhere but you couldn’t put your finger on it. He sort of looked like that man from the woods. Maybe you were imagining it. There is no way Bucky would lie about that to you, right? Of course not, he promised you the truth going forward and a better life together. 

Now your life consists of being a wife and soon-to-be mom living in the beautiful mountain area that is both your refuge and cage. You shake the word cage away instantly as you think of everything Bucky has done for you. He has kept you safe, loved you unconditionally, and has given you the freedom to explore the area with him. Bucky is so gentle and caring as long as you listen to him, which has now become easier to do over time. There have been no punishments from him in many months and life just seems simple now. Who would have thought a simple life awaited you in your future? Your hand caresses your belly softly and a light kick is felt under your hand.

“You're going to be a strong one Jamie, just like your papa.” You can’t help the smile that appears on your face. You know he is going to be Bucky’s mini-me. The thought of a blue-eyed boy warms your heart.

“Who is going to be strong like me?” Bucky's deep, gentle voice shakes you out of your daydreaming. Bucky climbs the stairs and takes a seat next to you. You look up to see him smiling at you with his eyebrow raised in curiosity.

“I was talking to Jamie about how strong he will be. I know he’s gonna be just like you with your blue eyes.” You grin back at him admiring how handsome he looks in his plaid long-sleeve shirt. He could almost pass as a lumberjack with his shirt and beard on display. 

“Our son will be healthy, and strong and hopefully have his mama’s looks cause you are so beautiful to me.” He leans into you and kisses you softly on the lips. You can’t help but hum in content. “Keep making those noises and I may have to take you right here.”

“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself when you kissed me so sweetly. Maybe when you’re done doing chores I can reward you later.” Bucky groans at your suggestion. 

Bucky smirks at you. “Just so happens I’m all done with chores.” 

His vibranium hand cups your cheek gently as he leans in for another kiss. This time the kiss grows into a passionate one and his tongue deepens the kiss. The moan that leaves your throat is a needy one and has Bucky sliding you into his lap. You instantly start grinding down on his hard cock beneath his jeans and it pulls a groan from Bucky. He draws back from kissing you for a moment and before you know what is happening Bucky stands up with you in his arms. 

He carries you bridal style into the bedroom where you both start pulling your clothes off in a frenzy until you’re both naked. Bucky and you crawl onto the bed, careful not to hit the baby bump on anything. Bucky lays you back on the bed as he makes his way between your legs. 

This is what Bucky loves about you. You're now obedient and submissive to him. What’s even better is your addiction to sex with him is natural and not drug-induced. You have an appetite now that you are this far along in your pregnancy and Bucky is enjoying every bit of it. His eyes look you over like you’re a fine dessert ready to be devoured. He lays between your thighs and drapes both your legs over his shoulders. Bucky softly kisses from your inner thigh to your pussy and back. A whine leaves your throat as his beard lightly teases you. 

“Patience doll, you know I will take care of you,” Bucky whispers against your thigh. This time he kisses his way back up your inner thigh but this time he licks along your clit. Bucky does it again and this time you’re moaning his name. He takes his time between your legs making sure to give you the pleasure you are craving. By the time he has you cumming, Bucky is ready to take you apart all over again. 

Bucky moves from between your legs and helps you roll over to your hands and knees. This position always brings pride to him as he gets to hold your baby bump. 

Bucky coats his erection in your arousal as he rubs it between your lips. Slowly he pushes into your sweet pussy until he bottoms out inside you. His hands settle on your hips and you both groan from the pleasure as Bucky starts up a slow, steady pace. The sensation of being so full of his cock almost overwhelms your senses as he picks his pace up and starts taking you harder. 

The sound of his hips smacking against you echoes within the bedroom. Your low whines increase with every thrust. It’s almost like he was teasing you as you are close to cumming again. Bucky’s flesh hand leaves your hip and lightly cups your belly. The thought of him being the one who got you pregnant always fills him with pride. He’s the reason for the family you’re about to start. 

His pace now quickens as he wants to feel your pussy grip him tight. “I can feel you clenching me tight, doll. God, I need you to cum for me like a good girl.” His breath is faltering as you grip the bed tighter with your fingers and groan out his name. Bucky’s fingers move from your belly to your clit and starts rubbing it in tight circles. The pressure keeps building up inside you until you’re hurdling off the cliff in pleasure, moaning his name to the heavens above. As soon as you tighten around his cock Bucky is groaning out his release and spilling his seed into you.

You both breathe in and out, trying to catch your breaths. Bucky’s lips kiss up your back and to your shoulder. Gently he pulls out of you and you both collapse on your sides. 

Following your lovemaking, you both shower and change into some comfy clothes. 

Deciding it was still a beautiful day out you both decide to sit outside on the porch and relax for the rest of the day. Bucky has his arm wrapped around you and his vibranium hand rubbing your belly. Now and then he would feel his son kick. This is one of Bucky’s many favorite things to do with you and lord knows he would do anything to keep you this happy. 

Snuggling in close to Bucky you realize this future is not bad after all. This is where you belong and where you will raise a family with Bucky. Nothing will get in the way of your happy ending. 

That is until you are both startled by a female screaming for help. Bucky jumps off the porch and looks around for where the voice is coming from. A woman appears out of the woods and is running towards the cabin. The woman runs up to Bucky begging for help. You are about to get up when Bucky tells you to go inside. You do as he says and walk into the cabin looking out at them.

The woman seems to be distressed and crying. She keeps saying she was kidnapped and needed help. Something feels familiar to you about this situation. Suddenly, the skies start to darken and a crack of thunder echoes across the forest. You suddenly feel a chill up your spine as a long blonde-haired man steps out from the tree line. It’s Bucky’s friend Thor that you met at the wedding. 

Thor walks up to Bucky who is holding the hysterical woman as she pleads for safety. Bucky easily hands her over to Thor, who is now throwing her over his shoulder. You watch as this screaming, terrified woman is being taken in the same direction that they came from. Your anxiety starts to kick up as memories swirl in your head about the day you were taken. Not taken, you think again, but rescued by Bucky. 

Once they are out of sight Bucky comes in to comfort you. He looks at your frightened face and pulls you close to him. “Are you okay?” He asks as he holds you in his arms.

You nod your head. “I think seeing her and the way she was acting stirred up some anxiety in me. I-is she going to be okay? She seemed scared.”

Bucky lets out a sigh. “She is Thor’s new girlfriend. She’s just a little confused is all. He takes care of her like I take care of you. She is safe and loved by him. I’m sure they will work everything out together. Don’t worry too much about it.”

“Okay, I won’t.” You can’t stop the bad feelings from kicking up and you know this will stay with you for a while. Bucky lets you go and kisses your forehead. He smiles back at you and heads to the couch to read. 

Inside your mind is screaming again that this has to be wrong. This woman seemed to be just like you were months ago. Is this the first time she’s gotten away from Thor? Maybe you could have comforted her or found out where she is staying, if it’s nearby. It would be nice to have a female friend especially if you want to run again. 

No, you don’t have a say in anything. Bucky is your life now and so is this baby you carry. You can’t let this unknown woman make you confused. Life will be better here with Bucky and once the baby arrives your life will finally have purpose again. You will never leave Bucky, you decide. This is your home now. You were made for him.

The End

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[its-time-to-write]

Omg I would love a Jamie Tartt x reader where the readers ex boyfriend was a footballer maybe a goalie and Jamie has to play against him in a match. I know it’s very vague but I’d love to see what you’d do! No pressure!! :))

I loved this request! Hope I did it justice

would hit him in a heartbeat now

You do not have a thing for footballers you swear. It just happens. You’ve been in exactly three and a half relationships, and only one of them was not a footballer.

He was a coach.

Anyway.

You would describe your type as lovable asshole, but your friends would leave out the lovable. Because of that, none of your splits have been exactly… amicable. Well, that’s not true. Your situationship had been sweet but wrong timing, and though it hurt, there were no hard feelings. 

Really, you were both in your late teens and he was scouted early on, so it was never going to work out. You always keep up with his career though, a part of you secretly cheering him on even if he plays against your boyfriend’s team. From time to time, you think about texting him to see if he has the same number, but the next day you see him splashed in a tabloid, making out with Keeley Jones, so you leave it. 

Six months later, you’re in a relationship with a West Ham goalie named Aleksander.

Seven months after that, he’s broken your heart by telling you you weren’t the right material for a footballer’s girlfriend.

Over text.

While you are at an away game.

Against AFC Richmond.

Eight minutes later you turn off the part of your brain that cares, dig out Jamie Tartt’s old number, and write, hey! not sure if this is still your number, but I’ll be at your game today and wanted to wish you luck. - the original number 9.

Your house number had been 9 when you first met Jamie. He’d write you notes addressed to 9. For example:

9 -

Meet me at our spot at 8?

10 <3

(He called himself a 10/10).

Ten hours later, you are sitting across from Jamie in a pub, laughing about growing up and whatever, all thoughts of Aleksander firmly gone from your head. 

He asks you out after flirting for eleven days.

—

You and Jamie have a certain level of comfortability that comes with knowing someone for so long. Neither of you feel like you have to pretend. You just live with each other, and it is the best. 

You’re on your fifth date, and second one at his house when, as you get up to go, he catches your hand and says, “Stay,” in a voice made gravelly by kisses.

You let him pull you back on the couch, and you do.

You end up staying a lot.

You’re together for a year, when, sitting on that same couch, Jamie says, “Playin’ West Ham next week.”

The marker in your hand slips from where you were coloring his tattoo. “What?”

“We go against West Ham next week. Wanna come?” Jamie asks, oblivious.

You trace the design on his right forearm. “I do, it’s just- Aleksander’s gonna be there. As their goalie. And I’d rather not be there to hear what he has to say to me.” You look up at Jamie. “It’s not because I don’t want to be there for you. It’s that- well, he, he always has things to say about his exes. And it’s not kind. I don’t really think I can handle it right now, you know?”

Jamie looks at you thoughtfully and nods, slipping his hand into yours. 

“D’you want to stay here while I’m gone? ’Stead of hanging around your flatmate. Might be nice to have a break.”

You smile, squeeze his hand and reply, “Sure!” grateful that he’s not pushing it.

Jamie grins back. “Good, I hate coming home to an empty house. Always hearing sounds like there’s ghosts or some shit.”

You laugh and shove his arm playfully. “And here I thought you were being completely selfless.”

—

It’s the day of the West Ham game. You’ve stolen one of Jamie’s jerseys from his closet and are on the couch with the largest bowl of popcorn known to mankind. You’re a little nervous to see Aleksander on the screen, but it’s overshadowed by your excitement to see Jamie play.

A quarter into the game, Jamie starts making his move. The team gets the ball near the goal, he shoots and-

He’s blocked by Aleksander.

Aleksander goes up to Jamie, and from your screen you see him ask a question and then make a lewd gesture.

Jamie’s face goes bright red and in an instant, Colin is holding him back from hitting Aleksander.

You see Jamie be pulled away, then watch him jog over to the coaches. Here’s what you don’t see:

“Permission to be a prick, coach,” Jamie says, still seeing red. How dare that dickhead say something so disgusting about you.

“Fuck no,” Roy says in a tone that says no arguing. 

“Coach,” Jamie says, because he’s never been one for self-preservation, “if you don’t tell me to be a prick, I’m going to be one all by meself, so I really think it’s better if you just give me permission.”

Ted, Beard, and Roy look at each other. Ted nods. “Alright Jamie, if you think that’s best then I guess, uh,” he holds up his middle finger behind his jacket. Roy and Beard follow suit, and Jamie smiles.

The game’s back on and you watch Jamie get going again. He kicks the ball and it hits Aleksander in the worst possible spot.

“Ooh!” You cover your mouth with your hands. That looks like an accident, but you know it’s not. There was a closeup of Jamie, and you can see that glint in his eye. He’s being a little prick.

He goes up to Aleksander to “check on him,” and whispers something in his ear. Aleksander, still doubled over in pain, nods. Jamie slaps him on the back a little too forcefully, then swaggers away, tongue out. 

You’re going to ask him about it when he gets home.

—

Richmond loses, and when Jamie walks into his house you’re on him in a moment. His hands are tangled in your hair and you’re tugging on his shirt and it’s not till three hours later, as you’re laying in bed playing with his hair, that he says, “I don’t regret it.”

It takes you a moment. “What?”

Jamie’s laying on top of you so he pushes himself up a bit to meet your eyes. “I don’t regret kicking that ball into that dickhead’s dick. I just wish I could have kicked him harder.”

“What happened out there, Jaim? You were mad-mad.”

He shakes his head slightly. “What do you think? That fuckin prick asked me a dirty question about you, and I lost it. Didn’t care about the game anymore. Didn’t want him to think he could fuckin get away with it.”

He looks so distraught and sincere that you can’t help it, you have to kiss that look off his face.

“I love you, Jamie Tartt,” you whisper. His face turns devilish.

“Mind showing me just how much?” he asks and you dissolve in a fit of giggles as he begins to pepper kisses along your neck.

[yandere-paramour]

Masterpost

Vivien Reyes🌺

Meet Vivien

Vivien Headcanons Part 1

Vivien Headcanons Part 2

I want to bite Vivien - ART

Vivien Catboy Maid - ART

Vivien's Average Workday

Vivien NSFW Headcanons Part 1

Vivien NSFW Headcanons Part 2

Vivien as an Herbalist

Vivien Learns that Darling is Sick Before the Reveal

First Time with Vivien - Part 1

First Time with Vivien - Part 2

Would Vivien be able to bring himself to punish his darling?

Cuddle Time with Vivien

Vivien is the opposite of a weaponized incompetence husband

Vivien’s Morning Routine

Atalanta Montclair☕️

Meet Atalanta

Chapter One

Leaving Love Notes for Ata

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

What Type of Yandere is Atalanta?

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Atalanta Headcanons Part 1

Atalanta Headcanons Part 2

Atalanta Headcanons Part 3

Baking Her A Cake

Atalanta NSFW Headcanons - Part 1

Atalanta NSFW Headcanons - Part 2

Ata’s Taste in Clothing

First Time with Atalanta - NSFW

Atalanta Headcanons Part 4

Cuddle Time with Atalanta

Chapter Six

Idolizing Asteria

Chapter Seven

A Long Day at Work - ART

Noelle Thompson 📱

Meet Noelle

Teenage Noelle

Noelle and Atalanta's Crimes

What Type of Yandere is Noelle?

Being Noelle’s Darling

Noelle’s House Darling

First time with Noelle

Noelle's Place

Noelle and Sasha / More Sasha

Jamie and Asteria

Can we hear more about Asteria and Jaime? What are their interests?

How long did it take for Jaime to fall in love with Asteria?

Asteria and Jamie NSFW Headcanons

I would like to go out with Jamie and have a fun night without the girls

Does Asteria even care he’s withering away from grief?

How would Jamie react to an adult Atalanta saying he’s a good dad?

How would Jaime react if Darling told him it wasn't his fault and tried to comfort him?

Does Asteria ever have like lucid moments whenever she sees Jamie extremely depressed?

How would Asteria react to Jamie getting better from his depression but in the process pulling back from her?

Jamie’s Wedding Night

AU where seeing what happened to Jamie traumatized Ata and turned her AGAINST her mother

Asteria, would you have any idea what position to be in if you want to turn a pretty boy into a sobbing mess in the bedroom?

Jamie, do you still think about trying to escape?

What if Jamie never snapped out of being broken?

Does Asteria feel cuteness aggression about Jamie?

Response to Asking Jamie about Escaping

Jamie's Type

What would Jamie do if he thought Asteria had an affair?

Jamie Doodles - ART

Asteria and Jamie’s Childhoods

Family Bonding Night

Favorite Asks

After kidnapping reader, how much would your ocs' behavior and personality would change?

I need more of Atalanta's parents' lore now +_+

First Kiss

Vivien and Atalanta Fanart

Meeting Darling’s Parents

Crossing my arms with a pout, I level my gaze with Atalanta. "I said no."I am not going." I bury my head back under the covers as if to prove it.

Atalanta's Trials

How would a beach day with Vivien and Atalanta go?

What style of clothing do the yanderes like to see their darlings in?

Atalanta is so boring

The Kissing Hand

Birthday Event 2024 - Asking Yanderes Tag

What does the Montclair family crest look like???

Atalanta and Noelle Foil Analysis

[oh-surprise-its-me]

You guys deserve to know I listened to Not Strong Enough by boygenius on repeat the entire time I wrote this. So you know. Keep that in mind.

-

He just keeps running. He can’t help it. Knows it will throw off his run at 4am with Roy.

Roy.

The point of his current problems.

Jamie’s worked a lot in therapy in the past two years. He knows he has self worth issues. Some days he wishes he can’t look into himself and see what’s wrong.

What’s broken.

What’s been tossed around for years and handled without the care it deserves.

He keeps running.

He’s always run when things get complicated. Sometimes literally sometimes not. He’s not running with a plan. He’s in Colin’s neighborhood though.

He thinks fuck it and runs to his house.

He knocks without thinking.

A light flicks on. Shit he woke them up. The door opens and Colin is standing there. “Jamie? You okay?”

Jamie opens his mouth, he thinks about lying. Michael comes up behind Colin, “hey Jamie? Wanna come in?”

God bless Colin and Michael. They’re incredible.

They are all sitting in the living room, Jamie keeps shaking his legs, “can I ask you guys something?”

Colin and Michael look at each other, “Jamie if it’s about knowing your sexuality-” Jamie laughs. “No mate I’ve known I’m bisexual for years but thanks.”

Colin nods, “okay go for it then.”

Jamie takes a deep breath, he looks at Michael first. Less scary then seeing Colin react to this. “How did you two know you were it for each other. Like that you wanted forever.”

Michael smiles at him. “It was like waves, it hit me one day and then kept hitting me stronger until I was swept up into it.”

Colin blinks away what look like tears, six months married and they are still sappy as hell.

“It wasn’t really a sudden thing. It was like I adjusted everything in my life so that he came first. There wasn’t a question about seeing him in my future plans. He was just there.”

Michael looks a little surprised. He leans over and kisses Colin.

“You wanna explain more Jamie?”

Jamie blushes. “I think I feel forever about Roy but we aren’t even together. Fuck I don’t even know. It’s like I’m an Angel and he’s a God and want to worship him.”

Michael has slowly started smiling more, “Jamie if I may?” Jamie nods, can’t get much worse. “Roy has been worshiping you and in love with you for as long as I’ve known you both.”

“What??” “Michael!”

Colin lightly taps his leg. “What he’s trying to say is that we think you’ll be okay if you tell Roy you want forever.” “I said what I said.”

Jamie nods again, if feels like he’s been nodding to a lot of things recently.

“Thanks I’m sorry I woke you guys up. I’ve uh. I’ve gotta go.”

Colin and Michael hug him before he takes back off running.

-

He makes a detour to the park. It’s empty at this time of night. He sits on a bench. Curls his legs up. He can’t do this. He can’t be this person.

He was never allowed. His dad tried to ruin everything for him.

What if Jamie ruins this.

His phone lights up. Roy’s texting him.

Where are you.

Christ what time is it how long did he run for.

Sorry took off early for run. At the park near my house?

Be there soon stay in place.

Okay.

God. Now he has to see Roy.

-

When Roy shows up he sits on the bench next to Jamie. “Where’s your head at Jamie?”

Jamie shrugs. Tucking his arms over his knees curling himself as close to a ball as he can while sitting up. “It’s here, just loud.”

Roy slides closer, he puts an arm around Jamie’s shoulder and pulls him closer. Jamie didn’t realize how cold out it was until he felt Roy’s body heat.

“Can I say something and you not be mad? Let me finish talking before you say anything?”

Roy nods, “course you can. It’s hard to be mad at you when you look this sad.”

“I’m in love with you. Want forever with you. Ran to Colin and Michael’s house to talk about how they knew. They just did. Roy I don’t know when it started but I just know I can’t stop it. I’m in love with you and it’s fine. It’s fine if you don’t feel the same. I just needed to tell you.”

Roy brushes the tears that fell off of Jamie’s face. “Good thing I feel the same then huh?”

Jamie felt the tears flowing down his face when he was talking but didn’t realize Roy saw them, let alone cared enough to remove them.

“The same? Roy you can’t. That’s crazy.”

Roy laughs. “Jamie I’m crazy, I haven’t done anything about it because I’m your coach. Didn’t want you to feel pressured. But I love you, I want forever with you too.”

Jamie risks a look at his face. He’s smiling. “Seriously?”

“Can I kiss you?”

Jamie nods, and suddenly he’s being kissed by Roy Kent. It’s maybe the softest kiss he’s ever gotten. He melts into it.

He pulls away. “You love me?” Roy touches his cheek, “I love you.”

Jamie leaps off of the bench, he starts spinning around he lets out a shout. “ROY KENT LOVES ME!”

Roy starts laughing and stands. “Jesus baby. Come on let’s go back to your place. I’ll cook.”

Jamie spins right into Roy’s arms. “You’ll cook for your.. boyfriend? Partner?”

“Future husband?”

Jamie smacks Roy. “We can’t just skip straight to that.” Roy takes his hand and holds it, there’s starting to be people out but clearly he doesn’t care. “Fuck straight, be my fiancé. We’ve known each other long enough, know everything about each other.”

“You’re going to kill me.”

Roy kisses him again. “I’m trying to worship you.”

Jamie blinks. Maybe this time he’ll be the God and not the Angel. “Let’s go home then fiancé.”

It’s Roy’s turn to whoop. He picks Jamie up with a spin and sets him back down.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

[jamiewintons]

You Deserve Better (Jamie Winton/F!Reader)

Summary: You and your toxic boyfriend break up, and your best friend Jamie is there to comfort you.

Tags/Warnings: Friends to Lovers, discussions of toxic relationships/cheating. Reader’s ex bf is named Owen because I legitimately looked up a random name generator and that’s what came up. Sexual references. Misogyny (from the awful boyfriend).

A/N: Based on an anonymous request that reads - "can i request jamie comforting reader after a breakup but he's like He didnt treat u right he wasnt exactly nice to you. and then he confesses he likes u and just some nice comfort plssss". So, I hope that the anon and everyone else who chooses to read this enjoys it very much!

Word Count: 2658

Jamie Tag List: @demontoucansam @the-fandomgremlin @clydethesnake @abloomingspaceship @butlersluvbot

~~~

Jamie had never liked your boyfriend. And it wasn’t because of the massive crush he had harboured for you since not long after the two of you became friends, no matter what Dave tried to say. Well, maybe it was a little bit about that, but Jamie also had plenty of valid reasons to hate the guy. For starters, he was a dick.

You had met Owen - the aforementioned dick of a boyfriend - at work about six months ago. Jamie had never been able to understand what you saw in him. Owen was rude, dismissive, and worst of all, utterly disrespectful of you. He mocked your interests, damaged your self-esteem with his 'opinions' on how you dressed and did your hair, and he especially didn’t approve of you having male friends - though thankfully, you were pretty adamant about keeping your friendships, but it did cause a lot of arguments that would often leave you crying on Jamie’s shoulder. 

Jamie always tried his best to be polite to Owen, even if deep down he hated the guy. He was sure he’d never disliked someone more in his entire life. You deserved to be treated like a princess, and Owen didn’t seem to appreciate how lucky he was to have been chosen by you. Dave often urged Jamie to make a move, but he didn’t want to be one of those weird guys who hit on their female friends. He worried that it would make you think that he’d only befriended you to try and get in your pants, and that couldn’t be further from the truth. When the two of you had met, Jamie was still mourning the disappearance of his wife, Layla, but his feelings of friendship for you slowly turned into romantic ones when he realised how sweet you were, and suddenly he realised you were the most beautiful woman in the world to him. He’d been sure he’d never move on from Layla, but you were the first person to make him want to try again.

But unfortunately, it was Owen that you liked, and not Jamie. All he could do was be a supportive friend and comfort you when you and Owen had yet another fight, but you’d always end up going back to him. It hurt Jamie to see you do that. Even if you didn’t come to the sudden realisation that you loved him, Jamie wanted to see you with someone who would make you happy, rather than someone who reduced you to tears every other week.

When he got your text saying that you and Owen had cheated on you and the two of you had broken up, Jamie couldn’t believe what he was reading. Cheating was a pretty evil thing to do in Jamie’s book as it was, but why the fuck would anyone ever cheat on you? You were smart, sweet, funny… as well as completely gorgeous - the whole package, really. Your only real flaw in Jamie’s eyes was that you didn’t see how wonderful you were (and that was probably part of the reason you ended up dating such a toxic nightmare). What he wouldn’t give to be able to tell you how amazing and beautiful he thought you were… but it would probably come off as weird, since you were just friends and you’d never expressed any romantic interest in him.

It was only about half an hour til the bank shut when Jamie got your text. You were probably the one of the only things in the world Jamie cared about more than his precious routine, so he asked someone else to close up for the night and left in a hurry. He made a quick trip to the shops to buy a tub of your favourite ice-cream - hoping to bring a smile to your face - and then headed straight to your house, knocking on your door and nervously fidgeting with his tie until you answered.

"Thought you might need this," Jamie said when you opened the door, your tear-stained cheeks making his heart ache. You were already wearing pyjamas despite the fact that it was only just after 6.30pm, so you were obviously going through a bit of a spiral. He couldn’t blame you for that after what had happened today.

"Thanks," you sniffled, taking the tub from Jamie’s hands and bringing him inside. You shut the door behind him, and went to place the ice cream on the table before moving back to give Jamie a hug. When you rested your head on his shoulder, he felt his heart melt. It took every ounce of his willpower to not press a gentle kiss to your forehead or run his fingers through your hair. He just wanted to hold you and make you smile again, but after a few moments you pulled away and he couldn’t help but mourn the loss of your body pressed against his. "I wasn’t expecting you to come over so quickly. You’re the best."

"It’s no problem." Jamie’s cheeks flushed a little when you called him 'the best', but he was happy that you didn’t seem to notice. He watched as you walked to the kitchen and grabbed a spoon so that you could start eating the ice cream he’d bought you straight from the tub. When you took your first mouthful of the ice cold dessert, your eyes did brighten ever so slightly. Mission accomplished, he thought to himself. "You’re going through something horrible, and it’s the least I can do as your friend."

"You remembered my favourite ice cream flavour," you mused, and Jamie followed you into the living room so you could sit side by side on the sofa. Then, you stabbed your spoon into the ice cream once again so you could scoop some more out.

"Of course I did." That was a pretty basic thing to remember about someone you’d been close friends with for years, Jamie thought.

"Owen never would have remembered something like that." You released a long, deep sigh of exasperation, looking like you were about to start ranting. Jamie didn’t mind. He knew that you would definitely need to vent after everything that had happened, and besides… he thought you were cute when you started rambling. Ugh, he was so sappy. "He never remembered anything about me. Honestly, I’m surprised he even remembered my name most days."

For the next few minutes, you spoke at length about all of Owen’s flaws. Honestly, it was refreshing to see you speaking your mind about him like this. In the midst of all of you and Owen’s fights while you were still dating, you would blame yourself for all of your relationship issues, no matter how many times Jamie tried to convince you that it wasn’t your fault. So Jamie didn’t interrupt - except to quietly agree with your assessment of the situation - and allowed you all the time you needed to get things off your chest.

"And this is a bit of a TMI, but he was really selfish in bed. Like he did not care whether I enjoyed myself or not. So good luck to that girl I caught him with. Hope she’s good at faking orgasms." You laughed dismissively, and then ate another spoonful of ice cream.

Jamie’s face flushed slightly, partially because of your use of the word orgasm, but mostly because he was trying not to think about the fact that if he had a chance with you, he’d do everything he could to make sure you were satisfied, and— yeah, he needed to not think about that, otherwise he’d have an embarrassing problem on his hands, and he didn’t want to humiliate himself in front of you. Then, what you’d actually said - apart from the bit about sex - sunk in. You’d actually caught Owen with another woman? "Do you, uh… do you want to talk about what happened?" he asked, both because he wanted you to talk about what happened for your own good, but also because it would distract him from thinking about… well, satisfying you. "Only if you feel comfortable."

You sighed again, but this time you sounded tired, defeated. "There’s not much to tell, I suppose…" You dropped your spoon into the tub of ice cream. It seemed like you were all out. Jamie internally scolded himself for not getting you a bigger tub. "I went over to his flat because we’d had lunch plans earlier, and he’d stood me up. Turns out he’d forgotten about me because he was too busy shagging some other woman. I walked in on them in bed together."

Jamie noticed your eyes starting to well with tears as you recalled the story, so he put his arm around you. You seemed to be comforted by the gesture and rested your head on his shoulder again, melting Jamie’s heart once more. God, you were so precious, but he couldn’t think about that right now. You needed a supportive friend, not an idiot fawning over you.

"When they saw I’d walked in, the woman quickly got dressed and left. Once she was gone, Owen and I ended up having another fight." Your voice had begun to get a bit shaky, another sign that you might start crying. Jamie wanted to nip that in the bud - seeing you cry was honestly a heart-shattering sight - but it was what you said next that truly confused him. "When I asked him why he’d cheated, he said that he had every right because I’d cheated first."

"What?" Jamie asked, utterly baffled. That did not sound like you at all, and even if you had cheated, Jamie probably would have known about it already since he was your closest friend and you told him pretty much everything.

"That’s what I said! Then he was like 'Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about', and when I asked him to explain he said 'Don’t pretend that there’s not anything going on between you and that Jamie guy'…" You’d cleaned up what Owen had actually said, since he hadn’t used such kind words to refer to Jamie and you didn’t want him hearing such horrid things being said about him.

Oh Jesus Christ… Jamie thought to himself, his heart pounding fast inside of his ribcage. Owen had actually thought that you and him had some kind of secret affair going on? He couldn’t help but feel like everything you’d gone through today was his fault, since Owen had believed he was justified in cheating because you apparently had already cheated… with him! That was when Jamie realised that you were still talking, and that he should probably get back to listening.

"He said 'Obviously you’re shagging him, because why else would he be hanging around you? It’s not like you’ve got anything else to offer,' and that’s when I told him it was over and I left. Then I came back home and texted you." You took a deep breath, having got to the end of your story. Well, there was something else that you’d wanted to say, but you weren’t sure whether now was the right time.

That certainly had been a lot. Jamie hardly knew what to say. "He’s a dick," was what he settled on saying, and he heard you let out a little riffle that made his heart flutter.

"Yeah, he is," you agreed, and Jamie could tell from your voice that you were smiling.

There was a long silence after that, with you still resting your head on Jamie’s shoulder. It felt so right sitting there with you like that, so close with his arm around your shoulder. It was like this was how things were meant to be. That was probably what possessed Jamie to say what he said next. "You know, I never thought Owen was good enough for you," he said softly, tilting his own head to the side and resting it on top of yours. You didn’t make any attempt to move away, so he assumed you were fine with it.

"I always thought that he was a dick, and he never treated you properly. You deserve someone who remembers your lunch plans and cares about whether you get off or not." He usually wouldn’t just come out and say something like that so plainly, but he was just speaking his mind now and wasn’t thinking too much about how he actually said things. "And you definitely deserve someone who doesn’t go around shagging other women just because he got jealous over something that wasn’t true—"

"It… wasn’t entirely untrue…" you replied, and Jamie sat up straight so that he could look at you.

"What… what do you mean?" Jamie’s heart began to race. Surely you didn’t mean what it sounded like you meant, right? He took a breath to try and keep himself calm, and it annoyed him how shaky it was.

"I mean, I… I have always had a bit of a crush on you…" You admitted, and Jamie was sure that he was dreaming or he was in a coma or something. There was absolutely no way that this was real. He felt you take your head off his shoulder and he looked at your face to try and determine whether you were joking or not.

You were blushing. Did that mean...? "A crush... a crush on me...?" Jamie asked softly, like the idea of anyone - let alone you, the most wonderful person in the world - having a crush on him was absolutely unthinkable.

"Yes, Jamie. I have a crush on you. A big one." You couldn't help but smile. You'd been unsure for a while whether Jamie felt anything beyond friendship for you, but his frankly adorable reaction to you telling him how you feel seemed to confirm that he did. "I have for years."

Jamie's face went completely red, and he was beginning to worry that he was going to faint. "You... you never said anything," he managed after a few moments of stammering uselessly, his cheeks feeling like they were on fire.

Of course you hadn't said anything! You'd been under the impression that the man was pining for his missing wife since the two of you had met. "I guess... I thought I wasn't good enough for you," you said with a shrug, not wanting to bring up the whole Layla situation if you didn't have to. Before you even had the chance to open your mouth to continue speaking, Jamie was talking again.

"You're not good enough for me?" Jamie shook his head, in complete disbelief. "Love, you're so far out of my league I feel ridiculous even fantasising about you.."

You couldn't help but giggle softly - both at Jamie calling you 'love', and him admitting that he'd fantasised about you. "You fantasise about me a lot, then?" It was hard to resist teasing him, especially when his cheeks flushed like that.

"I... uh..." Jamie rubbed the back of his neck nervously, unable to believe he'd just come out and said something like that to you, especially when you'd only just admitted you liked him. God, he was such an idiot sometimes. He knew that he should say something, do something, anything other than just sit there frozen, but he was at a complete loss.

Luckily, you seemed to know exactly what needed to be done.

The sound that escaped Jamie when he finally felt your lips against his was one of both contentment and relief. It just felt so... right. Like all of those years thinking that he wasn't good enough for you just melted away in an instant. Jamie brought his hands up to cradle your face as you kissed, stroking his thumbs against your cheekbones.

Eventually, the two of you had to pull away from each other, and Jamie could swear that the way you were looking at him right now was almost as good as the kiss. It was like you couldn't think of anywhere in the world you'd rather be than right here, with him - the exact same way he felt about you.

[jcbbby]

okay so a fic where the reader is like super scared of like love and intimacy bc she’s never felt it or had it reciprocated before and her and jamie are in bed and she’s like “can i tell you something? i’m kind of scared of you” and he’s like why and she explains it’s bc she’s never felt this way or had anyone else feel this way about her and it scares her to lose it and he admits he loves her and it freaks her out but they love each other so it ends in fluff lol

🎉JCBBBY'S 500 FOLLOWER PARTY🎉

very interesting concept! I hope you enjoy, thank you for sending in a prompt! <3 I'm also sorry that this is more a blurb than a fic! I fear these last few 500 follower prompts will be rather short just since I don't have a ton of time these next few days. but I really hope they're still nice to read!!!! - "Can I tell you something? I'm kind of scared of you." warnings: none! genre: fluff -

These last six months with Jamie had been a dream. But that's just it, that's what had you always having a pit of anxiety in your stomach lately. It had been six months of smiles, laughs, memories...surely that would all fall apart soon just as it always does, right?

Jamie seemed so perfect, though. He was always so thoughtful and attentive, he remembered the little things, and even surprised you on your birthday with your favorite flowers, which you couldn't believe he even thought of. You dreaded the day he inevitably would start pulling away, eventually stepping out of your life like it was nothing, like you meant nothing. Everyone else had in the past. Once they had gotten their use out of you, grown tired of you, you'd been discarded and left feeling like you just didn't have enough to give. It must be only a matter of time before he left too, no matter how much you hoped he wouldn't.

It terrified you to lose him. You couldn't lose him, not this time. You'd never felt so taken care of and appreciated, and it was often overwhelming to think about the pain that him ending things might cause.

"Babe?" Jamie asked, pulling you from your thoughts.

"Huh?" You snapped your head over to him laying next to you in bed.

He chuckled. "I asked if you wanted to go get brunch tomorrow, that little corner diner we went to on Valentine's Day?"

You cleared your throat. "Oh, yeah. Yeah that sounds nice." You smiled.

He cocked an eyebrow at you, reaching for your hand laid over the comforter. "What's on your mind? You okay?"

You took a deep breath. Maybe talking about it would pull the band aid off quicker. He could tell you then that he thinks maybe you should go your separate ways, or that he wants to see other people, or that you want different things, or one of the many other phrases that echo in your mind. If you could just get it over with, the pain would be over sooner too. Or maybe...maybe he would reassure you. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. He seemed different, maybe he was different.

"Can I tell you something? I'm kind of afraid of you." You looked up at him, a grimace spreading across your face.

He tilted his head, squeezing your hand a little tighter in his. "Scared of me? Darling, what do you mean? I'm not scary, am I?"

You shook your head. "No, no. Of course not. It's just..." You felt the tears come on with no warning. They were immediately staining your cheeks.

Jamie pulled you in close to him, holding you against his chest as he caressed your back. "Hey, hey..." He cooed. "You can tell me, love."

"It's just...everyone leaves. They always do." You sniffled, pulling yourself away from his embrace. "There's always a point where everyone decides they're done with me. And I...I don't want you to too." You wiped your eyes.

"Darling...I'm not going anywhere. I promise, okay? I love you." He smiled, bringing his head down to glance up at you.

You paused a moment, trying to process his words. "You-You love me? Oh, no... no, please don't say that. That will just make it so much worse when..." You frowned, closing your eyes as more tears fell from them.

Jamie pulled you in again, holding you tightly against him. He kissed the side of your head, speaking quietly into your ear. "Baby, no. No, I mean it. I'm not going anywhere, unless you want me to?" He asked.

"No, never." You said, muffled into his chest.

"Good. I'm glad we're on the same page then. Neither of us are going anywhere." He chuckled. "Hmm?" He released you, holding you at arms length.

You smiled, leaning in to place a gentle kiss against his lips. He brought his hands up to either side of your cheeks, holding you there as he kissed you back. You both smiled into each other's lips. As the kiss broke, you leaned yourself into his arms, pressing your back into his chest as he brought his arms around you.

He rested his cheek against yours. "I'm glad we talked about this. I don't want you to ever feel like you're not enough. And I meant it, I do love you."

You smiled, exhaling a sigh of contentment. "I love you too, Jamie."

[renee-writer]

He Didn't Have to Be Chapter 1

A/N It will be posted once a week on Sunday.

AO3

I meet my dad when I was six. I was sitting in the living room with a sitter as my mum prepared to go out. Her date nights weren’t my favorite time, even as I knew, even at six, that she needed them.

 

My birth dad died when I was a baby. Mum told me about him and his pictures were on my nightstand and the walls of our little flat. Still, I long for a dad I can touch. One that will help me on the football pitch and read me stories.

 

I remember sighing as I sat there with Lara. She was a nice lady, just wasn’t my mum.

 

“I won’t be to long, Judah.” She kisses my cheek and I smell her going out perfume.

 

“Okay mum.”

 

“Be good for Lara.”

 

I nod. The expected knock on the door. He is here, this person that mum is interviewing for the role as her husband and my dad. At six, I didn’t know that but age brings clarity.

 

She goes to answer it and I jump up to see him from around the corner.

 

He is a giant, that is my first impression. Towering over my mum, who isn’t short, he makes an immediate impression on me.

 

“Hello Jamie.”

 

“Hello Claire. Who is this?” He nods towards me and my heart sinks. Men are sweet to mum until they find out about me.

 

“My son, Judah.”

 

“Praise, that is what your name means. What a braw lad you are, Judah. We are going to the movies, would you like to join us?”

 

I couldn’t believe my ears! I never get invited to go. This giant man, with his Scottish burr, is inviting me. I look to mum. She is smiling and her eyes are wet. Happy, she is happy. She nods.

 

“Thank you sir.”

 

“I shall just dismiss Lara.”

The man, Jamie, gets down to my level. “Judah, as you are the man of the house, I want to assure you that I shall treat your mum like the queen she is and you as a young prince,” He puts his hand out, “will you give me a chance?”

 

I take the man’s huge hand. It swallows up mine but his gasp is gentle.

 

“Yes sir.” He rubs my brown curls.

 

“Good lad.”

 

I will never forget that day, sitting between my mum and him. There is a huge tub of popcorn in my lap as we watch the movie. Strangely, I can’t recall what movie. It was more about how I felt.

 

Safe and cares for. Included. It was the look on my mum’s face, soft and happy as she looked at me and Jamie. The way my hand fit in his when we walked out.

 

It was the first of many ‘family dates’ as we called them, over the next six months. Mum and Jamie went out on their own too. I didn’t mind though because I knew it wasn’t to exclude me, unlike the other men.

 

I was laying in bed one night while they softly talked in the living room. Their voices sooth me and I am almost asleep when I hear him say,

 

“My darling Claire, will you marry me? I promise to be the best husband and father. I love you and Judah so much. I will always treat him like my own son. In my eyes he is. And you, my love, my heart, the way you need. Forever, you both will have me, as long as I draw breath.”

 

I couldn’t bare it and jumped out of bed, running in. Jamie sat queerly on the floor, supported by one knee. He holds a ring box out to my mum.

 

“Yes mum! Please say yes!”

 

They turn towards me. Jamie is smiling with tears in his eyes. Mum is the same. It takes me no time to understand it is out of happiness.

 

“Yes Jamie! Yes!” He slips the ring on her finger. I run up to join them and we all hug.

 

Much later, I realized that they probably wanted to be alone though they said nothing.

 

“So Judah, ready for a wedding,” mum asks.

 

I had no idea what a wedding was. “What is that?”

 

They both laugh.

 

“Well, you get to dress up, wear your Sunday best, and stand by me while I vow to love your mum forever and ever, and you as well.”

 

“Sounds girlie but,” I quickly add, “neat too.”

 

“It will be, Judah, it will be.” She hugs me close and I feel her happiness radiating off her.

[livvyofthelake]

well see the thing about the wicked powers is that we literally have to give thanks and praise and all that to dru because frankly she's taking the craziest hits for me on multiple fronts. as we all know every cassie series has to have some semblance of a love triangle and i always hate it and she never stops doing it and it makes me want to kill her more than anything in the world. dru's taking the love triangle bullet and the thing about it is that she might actually slay. this could be cassie's first love triangle that doesn't make me want to shoot myself in the head. sorry. no i didn't like tessa's either i was not a tid girlie i respect those who were but that was not my life peace and love. i hate a love triangle i really do. it's always so clear which guy she has to end up with it's fucking annoying. and that's also true for dru and ash like we all know she's not ending up with jamie he's a red herring but still it could possibly even be interesting. you know? like i actually want to see how this pans out. as opposed to say. cordelia and matthew, which made me want to kill myself. the other thing is that cassie loves it when her girl protagonists do this annoying ass oh i'm so insecure how could he ever love little old me thing, which with characters like emma and cordelia, again, made me want to fucking kill myself. but dru could slay that, we already know she would feel that way about jamie, we don't know anything about ash actually and i don't want to cast judgment on him so early so i won't speculate about whether the insecurity shit will be annoying for them. small tangent, i LOVE how cassie has given us basically nothing about ash. good. i don't want to know lest i develop an incorrect perception just to watch cassie jace/will-ify him twp book one. i had to watch that happen to my buddy james herondale and it made me so mad it's unreal. like i would prefer to not get to know that boy until we're like maybe six months out from release. to be honest. i've just been sitting here thinking well he's probably going to either be like a holly black love interest or he's going to be another will herondale-ified stock love interest. either way i don't care the point is i'm flexible. finally the last thing i need to say rn, and this is what i was thinking about earlier if you recall. the other thing all cassie main couples have to do is secret relationships. these idiots love getting into secret relationahips it's so crazy. one thing about me: i hate secret relationships. the way cassie does it can be slay (emma and jules) but i would kill myself if that had to happen to kit and ty. so i'm so absolutely grateful that they aren't the main relationship and dru is the one that has to take all these hits. she's literally doing so much for me AND she might even slay all of it. i hate to say this but i might love her as a protagonist more than cordelia. that's an early thought though don't hold me to that. but think about all the cassie protagonist staples, and then think about dru. she could really slay that in a way not seen before since clary herself..... emma of course is exempt from a lot of the cassie staples because emma and jules are special in the sense that they're like essentially gender flipped. it's complicated to explain but just trust me when i say cassie has a formula and emma and jules are something different, and that's why they're my favorites of course <3

anyway. thanks dru. i'm thrilled to see her as a protagonist and my special guys as secondary protagonists, truly nothing better than being the secondary romance in a cassie book, remember lucie and jesse...... goddamn. would you all say simon and izzy of magnus and alec are the "secondary romace" of tmi? discussion question. i would say simon and izzy because simon is the tertiary protagonist, but i feel like maybe they're actually just equally secondary. obviously the secondary romanc eof tda is cristina et al but they're a flop as we all know. however it only makes sense that they'd be the flop secondary romance because tda is the exception to the main couple rules. well in any case i'm glad this series won't come out for a while i sincerely need to become normal before i have to read all that.

[tartt9]

Ted completing things at Richmond is an odd way to think about his presence there. He'd gotten them relegated. If he'd never sent Jamie back to City in the first place [ because, apparently, sacrificing the boots his mum had gotten him hadn't been enough, his story hadn't been enough, despite the fact that it had been leagues above everyone else's shit sacrifices ] Richmond would've survived to play another season in the Premier League. Jamie had singlehandedly kept them mid-table before Ted's arrival – fuck's sake, he'd scored more in his six months at Richmond than fucking Son with Spurs had scored all season. Despite all of that, though, the boys had grown attached to their incompetent odd American gaffer. "Yeah, super fucking annoying," Jamie agrees, taking another sip of his incredibly strong mojito. At least it's vanilla vodka, so he can manage to drink it without pulling a face. If the team had agreed with Jamie that Lasso was incompetent, that it was irresponsible to hire him in the first place and just as irresponsible to actually listen to him, maybe they would've survived relegation, too. Not that Jamie cares about Richmond's fate, he doesn't play for them, but still... it would've been nice to see them stay up for one more year – even if Jamie had been the one to relegate them with his assist to Hendrick. Jamie had done his job, Lasso had failed his. Which one of you is still involved in English football, that angry man's voice in the back of his head not-so-helpfully chimes in. Jamie takes another sip of his mojito, telling that voice to fuck off.

He looks up as Dennis says that he hasn't spoken to another customer this much in a long time. Is that the truth, or is he just saying that to make Jamie feel better? Jamie knows he looks like shit. He can't sleep properly here, he can't fucking drive because the cars are backwards and the streets are backwards - everything he used to do for peace has been taken from him, except for fucking walking, and even that doesn't feel right here. Dennis goes on to keep describing Paddy's, and... "Yeah, sounds like a fucking disaster, pal." He can't imagine that. Not that he's ever known what work is like; his whole life, he's played the game he loves for work. He's earned enough money to sustain himself being an ace of a footballer. But he knows from watching his mum growing up that work's typically not like that. Not fun. Work's just something that's done to pay bills, to keep food on the table. "That doesn't sound, like... sustainable." For the business or for the sake of the workers. "Are y'like... keepin' yourself fed and allat...?"

dennis gives a small nod as the other mentions knowing all about complicated shit dads, and dennis doesn't pry any. because talking about family sucked, honestly. and this was just a conversation, not some fucking therapy session. there was loads more that he could share about frank that would probably shock jamie, but he's not going to say it. partially because he didn't need to, partially because it still fucking hurt to think about sometimes. yeah, frank completed the gang ... frank and charlie were closer it seemed than frank was with dennis and his sister. but it was fine, dennis just tried not to think about it much. but now he was fucking thinking about it. why did he bring frank up again ?? he lets out a small sigh, taking a sip of his drink. "as annoying as people like that might be, they do complete things in a weird way. sucks, but it's good. complicated, annoying."

brow raises when jamie says this is the most he's talked to people since he moved here, and dennis can't help but feel a little bit bad for the guy. but he gets it, honestly. "this is the most i've talked to a customer in a long time." jamie didn't looked too pleased by his own confession so, dennis figures he'll turn it on him for a bit. christ, why is he feeling so nice tonight ?? "let you in on a little secret, man. most of the time i'm not even behind the bar when i'm working. because we don't usually have customers, i'm fucking around with the other people i work with. most of the time, we aren't even in the bar. i mean, everyone i've told you about that works here isn't here, which means they're probably out running around south philly doing some stupid scheme or whatever. i drew the short straw, i guess. forced to tend bar." he lets out a small laugh, shaking his head. "paddy's is kind of a disaster." and so are the people that work here. "so thanks for supporting the business." he teases, gesturing at the others drink. like dennis is going to let the guy pay for the fucking drink, jamie looked like he needed a whole free drink tonight, not just a free double.

[gotham-ruaidh]

Little Bit Better Than I Used To Be

Catch up: Chapter 1 (Starry Eyes) || Chapter 2 (Save Our Souls) || Chapter 3 (Dancing On Glass) || Chapter 4 (Merry-Go-Round) || Backstage (1) || Backstage (2) || Chapter 5 (Danger) || Backstage (3) || Chapter 6A (Love Walked In) || Chapter 6B (Without You) || Backstage (4) || Chapter 7 (Stick To Your Guns) || Chapter 8 (Time For Change) || Backstage (5) || Chapter 9 (Take Me To The Top) || Backstage (6) |I| Also posted at AO3

–----

Chapter 10: Home Sweet Home

Take me to your heart // Feel me in your bones // Just one more night // And I'm coming off this long and winding road // I'm on my way // I'm on my way Home sweet home...

Soundtrack: “Home Sweet Home,” Mötley Crüe, 1987 [click here to listen]

Dr. Quentin Lambert Beauchamp, aged seventy-four, carefully exited the limousine through the door held open by the driver.

“Thanks again,” he remarked quietly.

“That way,” the driver pointed. Lamb saw a piece of colorful paper with an arrow and the word CREW, pointing toward an open door.

As he approached, a huge, bulky man emerged from inside.

“Got a pass?”

Lamb offered the laminated card he’d received via messenger that morning. The man squinted at it. “Friends and family – OK, let me take you myself.”

Lamb had never been behind the scenes at the Boston Garden – or at any arena, for that manner – and the sheer number of people scurrying to and fro was incredible.

Men hauling loops of wire.

Construction workers in hard hats.

Stacks and stacks of black crates with PRINT stenciled in six inch letters.

People with clipboards and walkie talkies.

Everyone was smiling. Especially Lamb – not caring how out of place he looked in his professor’s chinos and oxford shirt.

They turned a corner into a corridor, with several doors that were clearly dressing rooms. The man turned to Lamb. “Wait here. There’s a lounge with food and drinks, but I don’t think it’s open yet.”

“That’s quite all right. I don’t want to be in anyone’s way – ”

“LAMB!”

The older man turned, only to get swept into a bear hug and off of his feet.

“Oof! Easy!”

Jamie Fraser – shirtless and in black leather pants, with black streaks smudged beneath his eyes – grinned. “So great to see you! We’ve really been looking forward to having you here.”

Lamb flushed. “Well, the pleasure is all mine. I must say that it’s a bit different from the academic conferences that I’m used to.”

Jamie shook his head and placed his hands on his hips, the swirls of tattoos covering his arms dark in the half-light backstage. “I bet. Hey, do you want some earplugs? I’m told the shows can be kind of loud.”

Lamb patted his shirt pocket. “Brought some. I do want to be able to hear tomorrow, you know.”

“LAMB!”

He whirled to see his dearly beloved niece – glowing in a denim jacket and white t-shirt and ripped jeans – and he bent to give her a hug.

“Oh, my dear! I’m so excited to be here!”

She pulled back, still smiling, and sank against her husband’s shoulder. He held her close and kissed the crown of her head.

“Hey, do you want to stand side stage with me during the show? You can sit, if you want – I know your knee isn’t the best. Jamie can rustle up some chairs. So we can be together, if you want?”

Lamb nodded. “That would be fantastic. Jamie, I’ve been listening to all of your records these past few days, to prepare myself for tonight.”

“Uh-oh,” he laughed. “Should I be worried?”

“Certainly not. You’re quite the gifted musician, but I’ve known that since I met you. And I must say that your newest album is your best.”

Jamie flushed. “Well, your niece is the woman who inspired all of it. So of course it’s great.”

Claire playfully swatted his shoulder. “Flatterer.”

“Yeah, well. We open the show with the title track. Billboard says it’s been number one in the country for five weeks now.”

Lamb smiled. “With a title like She’s My Addiction, and with people learning about your and Claire’s story – I’m not surprised.”

“OK, people. Ten minutes to showtime.” A balding man with a headset and clipboard appeared. “Do you need help finding side stage?”

“Actually, Tom, can you show my uncle where we’ll be sitting? I just realized I forgot something in Jamie’s dressing room.” Quietly Claire slipped her thumb over the side of Jamie’s pants, digging her thumbnail into his hipbone, relishing his shiver.

Tom nodded. “Sure – this way, sir. Ten minute warning.”

“Got it. See you later, Lamb!”

And with that Jamie and Claire quickly disappeared into his dressing room. Lamb heard the lock turn.

Tom sighed. “Every damn night, those two.”

Lamb smiled. “There are far worse things. Show me to my seat?”

~~~FIN~~~

[its-time-to-write]

chapter 5

guys I got confused and apparently I’ve had chapter five done for a while and the chapter I’ve been stressing over is actually chapter six??? I’m so terribly sorry! But here it is lol, I’m still a bit concerned I’ve written myself into a corner but I’ll post chapter six on Monday if not sooner.

table of contents

at least I’m trying

Jamie’s the one driving the car, but he’s actually worried that he’s about to be a murder victim. He’s never been a big fan of true crime, so he’s not entirely fucking thrilled that he’s going to be come one but he supposes he probably deserves it and anyway, maybe death isn’t so bad in the grand scheme of things.

Except he wants to actually hold Clare and buy her things and tell her he loves her and never leave her ever.

So maybe death-by-Madeline is actually so bad in the grand scheme of things.

“What the HELL is your problem?” she asks, and she’s actually expecting an answer so Jamie has to think fast. What the hell is his problem? No- what has he done in the present for Madeline to come straight from Milan to chew him out?

“What exactly do you mean?” he asks carefully. He needs to make sure Madeline knows he isn’t fucking hostile or some shit, and that maybe if he handles this right she can put a good word in with you.

He knows he’s reaching, but hey. He’s made it this far in life.

Madeline glares at him. “I mean, where the fuck do you get off showing up like this? Are you trying to take Bean? Because let me tell you, only one of us was at the birth and that shit was fucking gross. But the ones who showed up are the ones who get to take care of her, not some deadbeat father who’s too busy kicking a ball and fucking models to actually care about anything.”

That offends Jamie, but it terrifies him more than anything else. Because yes, he wasn’t around, but he didn’t know. And now he does fucking know and he has to actually see if he’s a good father or if being a piece of shit truly is genetic. 

But he can’t imagine treating Clare even a fraction of the way his father treated him, so he’s hopeful.

He says, “I just want them to be taken care of,” and Madeline sighs.

“You can’t keep dragging her around, Tartt,” she reminds him as if he didn’t remind himself a year ago before thinking fuck it and calling you. It was supposed to go different. He was supposed to tell you he loved you and wanted you back and was done being a fucking idiot, except he got freaked out so he clammed up and left. And maybe that’s the strongest evidence as to why he should just leave the whole thing alone.

Jamie says, “I’m not,” but it feels like he’s trying to convince himself at this point.

“Being a parent is a lot of responsibility,” Madeline says.

He says, “I know,” then realizes he’s driven them to your street. He parks where he knows you can’t see him and waits for whatever Madeline has to say next.

She pinches the bridge of her nose. “She still loves you a little bit, you know. That’s why this whole thing is such shit. I truly think she’d take you back if she could trust the fact that you wouldn’t leave her, and I actually fucking think it would be good for her. But you’re the fucking worst so it isn’t going to happen, obviously.”

“I’m not leaving,” Jamie says. “I wouldn’t do that to Clare.”

Madeline says, “You’ve met her twice,” and Jamie gets her point. Because yeah, he’s met her twice and he loves her but that’s not really a reason to try to patch things up with you, and that’s what Madeline’s really saying, so Jamie says, “It’s not because she has our baby.” 

“Oh, is it not?” Madeline asks in her most sarcastic posh voice. “Then by all means, enlighten me as to what you think you’re doing with my best friend other than re-fucking her up.”

She’s got bags under her eyes, partially from Milan and partially because she’s just tired too. It’s her firmly-held opinion that you deserve the whole entire world and nothing less, but there isn’t much she can do to give it to you. She can try to protect you, she can threaten Jamie and torment him and bring you coffee and help put Bean down for naps but she can’t take the entire weight of it off of you. 

And she was being completely fucking honest when she said she thought Jamie would be good for you. He was the best when you were together, always taking care of you when no one else would, and Madeline worries sometimes that you’ll never let that happen again. 

“You don’t NEED a man,” she’d said more than once, “but if you wanted one just to take your mind off things or to buy your dinner I have a whole list.”

“I’m pregnant, Madeline,” you’d reminded her to which she’d just grinned and said, “Babe, there are real men out that who love that shit.”

You’d never taken her up on her offer because she knew, down in her core, that you were waiting for Jamie. She never, ever brought it up because she also knew you would be mortified to admit it. And that even though you wished for it deep in your soul, you also knew it would never happen.

“I’m not going to re-fuck her up,” Jamie says firmly, and if this were less serious of a situation he sees at least three ways he could turn that sentence into something dirty. “I have a plan.”

Madeline raises an eyebrow. “I find that hard to believe,” she says. She reaches for the door and shoulders her away bag. Jamie watches her walk up the street and to your house without looking back once.

—

The first thing Jamie does is call Georgie because he actually does not have a plan. He has a vague idea of sweeping you in his arms and kissing you and that’s about it. He just can’t for the life of him figure out how to get there.

But his mum’s been on the other end of this, so she’s got to have some wisdom for him which is why Jamie calls her before he’s even out of your neighborhood.

He starts talking before Georgie can even say hello. He tells her the whole thing and about the fact that he’s an entire father out of nowhere and he has no idea what he’s even doing but there’s a part of him that wants to quit football and yes mum, he knows he’s being fuckin’ dramatic but he just wants to get his point across yeah? And by the time he’s done explaining that he just wants to make things right and permanent, he’s back inside his big empty house and wishing he were over at yours instead.

Georgie sighs and says, “I love you darling, but you’ve really fucked it,” and Jamie feels awful.

“I just don’t want to be like Dad,” he says quietly and Georgie says, “Jamie Tartt, you are nothing like that man. You’re my sweet, sexy little baby and you’ve grown up so much since you’ve been away. Don’t you ever think you’re like him.”

She’s right, Jamie knows that, but still. “So what do I do?” he asks.

Georgie’s silent on the other end of the line for a moment. Jamie doesn’t know if she’s hesitating or thinking but she says, “Now Jamie, I can’t promise this will work for you. And you need to make sure you’re listening to what that poor girl wants every step of the way. But I can tell you what I used to wish your father would do for me back in the day.”

Jamie digs around his house for a pen and paper because what’s the good in being England’s best striker if you can’t go for a long shot?

—

You’re not surprised Madeline is at your door, but you are surprised that she hasn’t been back to her flat yet.

“Your flight got back hours ago,” you say, baffled. She just shrugs. “Customs was an absolute nightmare,” she responds and you know she’s lying but you don’t question it. You just wave your hand vaguely to the guest shower that doubles as Mads’ second home and pull out a takeout menu. 

Clare is on the brink of sleeping through the night, but she still isn’t quite there so you just do not have the brain space to cook a real dinner. It’s not like Madeline cares, anyway.

By the time the food arrives, Madeline is out of the shower and laying on the couch with Clare as she recounts her trip, carefully omitting how much time she spent with Keeley fucking Jones. You know you shouldn’t hate her, but god, every time you see or hear her she just says one insensitive thing after another. So you don’t pry when Mads clearly skips over something; you only press when you know it’s about whoever her mystery fling was, which she is less tight-lipped about.

It’s only after you’ve both eaten and Clare is (mostly) asleep for the night that she asks far too casually, “You’re not thinking of getting back together with Jamie, are you?” and you nearly choke.

“I beg your fucking pardon?” you laugh and she lifts a shoulder in a shrug.

“I think he’s going to try something,” she says. “I just don’t want you to get hurt again. Just because he wants you back doesn’t mean he’s going to fucking change. It’s really not the same shit, you know.”

You say, “Yeah, I know,” because you do. But if he’s going to volunteer to be awake late at night so you don’t have to, you might just take him up on it. Especially because you think it would be a much-needed humbling experience for him.

“What if I did?” you ask while Madeline sips her wine. “What if I did take him back?”

Madeline sets down her glass with a clink. “Then I think you’d need a plan,” she says seriously.

—

Madeline’s plan consists of specifically detailed criteria Jamie must meet before he’s redeemed as a trustworthy person. It includes signifiers of emotional intelligence, maturity, and a general sense of stability that has been previously dispelled. She writes everything down and sticks it to the fridge with a magnet, right under Clare’s ultrasound photos. 

“If he can well and truly change, then he’s allowed back,” she says, and you agree. 

And for the first time, you allow your hope to come to the surface.

Meanwhile, Jamie’s finished his own list. Everything his mum would’ve like to see his dad do and everything Simon actually did do to win her over. It’s a wide range, that’s for sure, from flowers to grocery shopping to fucking cooking which he definitely hasn’t done since he was twenty-one but he knows how to fucking read, doesn’t he? Cooking’s just following instructions and he can do that pretty well on the pitch, so it probably is the same thing. 

He’s awake all night. All he can think about is how much he misses you in the bed next to him, and then around four in the morning he gets really fucking worried that all of this is just selfish and he should actually just leave you alone.

So instead of trying to sleep (because apparently it’s useless) he makes a cup of coffee and goes for a walk. 

He walks all the way to the green in the dark and goes to sit on a bench, except it’s already occupied.

“Mornin’ Jamie,” says Ted. “Bit early for a walk, ain’t it?”

Jamie just looks at him. “You’re awake too,” he points out, and Ted shrugs.

“Just a little jet lagged,” he replies.

Jamie knows that’s bullshit, and he says it. “You’ve been here long enough, coach.“

Ted shrugs again. “Guess it never really leaves you.”

He doesn’t say anything else but he doesn’t seem like he’s trying to get rid of Jamie, so Jamie sits down. A few minutes pass before Ted says, “Henry wanted to talk, so I woke up to FaceTime him. Then I couldn’t go back to sleep because I just miss him so dang much.”

Jamie says, “Same coach,” without thinking, and now it’s Ted’s turn to give him a look. Jamie ignores it and says, “I got a kid. Couldn’t fucking sleep thinking about her and her mum, you know? I just want to be fucking… involved but it’s all weird, like.”

“Weird how?” Ted prompts. He has enough questions to fill a black hole but he’s sure it’ll come out sooner or later so for now he’s just going to listen. 

Jamie leans back and stares at the sky as it begins to lighten. “Pretty sure I’m still in love with her. I sort of fucking suspected when I were with Keeley, but it weren’t till I saw her again that I knew for sure. But I don’t want to be fucking selfish and shit, so now I think I should just leave them alone.”

“Is that what she wants?” Ted asks as if he hasn’t had this conversation with himself a million times and moved to stinkin’ London to try to prove that he wasn’t selfish himself.

Jamie lifts a shoulder. “She doesn’t want me to leave again.”

Ted says, “Then don’t.”

next chapter

[hockeyboysimagines]

Can you do fuck up the friendship with Tyler Seguin ? ♡

This was so fun! I’m so glad someone requested this song for him because he’s exactly who I wanted to write it for. Thanks so much and enjoy!-💕

Warnings: sex and implied sex.

Are you gonna kiss me?/‘Cause you're taking me homeIt's four in the morning/Are we doing this wrong?/This weekend I saw you/Through eyes that are new/You got me falling for you/And I kinda want to (want to)

Tell me what you mean/Is it all me? (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)/Start to overthink everything (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)/When you're close to me, I can't breathe (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)/We're already six-feet deep/Let's fuck up the friendship/Come get in my head/Baby, cut the tension/I'm hung by a thread

Maybe it's something/But let's not pretend/Or maybe it's nothing/And this is the end

“All I’m saying is you guys look good together.” Jamie said giving Tyler a mischievous smile. Tyler rolled his eyes and waved him off.

“Come on Dude. You mean to tell me you don’t think she’s hot?”

“Of course I do. She’s fucking gorgeous, but she’s my friend.”

“You guys flirt all the time.”

“I flirt with you all the time too Big Rig, maybe I should ask you on a date. ”

“I mean if you insist-“

“Enough you two Jesus!” Roope said shushing them both and shaking his head “If he doesn’t wanna ask her out then leave him alone.” Jamie wasn’t wrong. He did want to take her out but he wasn’t so sure she felt the same about him. Being flirty people it was hard sometimes to tell the difference between what was real and what wasn’t, so he pushed it out of his mind and admired her from a friend standpoint.

“Thank you.” Tyler said taking a drag from his beer bottle. She was standing about ten feet away absorbed in an intense game of beer pong that had been going for a while. She and Esa were partners and had been the reigning champs for over two hours. As if she felt him looking at her she turned to smile at him, and without looking tossed the ball and sank it into the final cup, winning the game. With a screech Esa came flying around the table lifting her up over his shoulder and took a victory lap around the living room. When he finally set her down, she came over and accepted a high five from Jamie.

“Nice game.” Tyler said holding up a beer. She had on this tight little white tank top and these dark jeans and he wanted nothing more than to rub the beer bottle all over her exposed skin.

Wait what? He shook his head, and felt heat creep up his neck.

“Nah. I actually have to get going it’s almost 4 in the morning.”

“I’ll take you.” He piped up before anyone else could offer. She smiled and went to say goodbye to her friends as Tyler trailed behind her. He tried really hard not to stare at her ass, but he couldn’t help himself. He had always looked at her different but the guys on his team had been pushing the idea extra hard lately. He was mostly silent as he drove her home, and as they walked to her front door. The streets were dead, as they should be at 3:50 in the morning, the only sounds coming from the highway and the occasional car that rolled down the street.

“Are you okay?” She asked when they reached the door. She leaned against it, keys hanging loosely in her hand.

“Fine why?” She shrugged “Your unusually quiet.”

He bit his lip. It was now or never “The guys are just kind of riding me that’s all.”

“About me?” Tyler froze, eyes moving slowly over to hers. How could she know? Fucking big mouth Jamie no doubt had said something to her. She started laughing.

“You guys are all extremely loud.” Tyler laughed nervously and looked at his feet “Yeah they just like to tease me is all. Sorry about them. We’re friends right? I don’t wanna mess that up.”

She shrugged and cocked her head to the side “I kinda do.”

She had this look, a look he had never seen before. Tension hung thick and heavy in the air. It sent a chill down his spine and into his other extremities and before he knew it he had crossed the porch, and pulled her into a heated kiss. It never occurred to him that this would completely fuck their friendship up, and if it hadn’t he wouldn’t have cared.

She was tugging at the button on his jeans when he reached around her to unlock the door and they disappeared inside, not even able to make it to her bedroom.

We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends/We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends

It got kind of scary/My bones always knew/Oh, I didn't mean to/Are you feeling this, too?/Tell me what you mean/Is it all me? (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)/Start to overthink everything (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)

When you're close to me, I can't breathe (Ah ah ah ah ah ah)/We're already six-feet deep

Let's fuck up the friendship/Come get in my head/Baby, cut the tension/I'm hung by a thread/Maybe it's something/But let's not pretend/Or maybe it's nothing/And this is the end

We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends/We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends

She was thoroughly over sexed and exhausted by the time Tyler made his way from her house the next morning but she felt good. The flirtatious behavior had always been there but it had finally come to a head. She would be lying if she had said she hadn’t enjoyed what had happened but now that she came down from her high she had realized that maybe that was all it was. Tyler was in her head now.

Was she just a hookup? Surely he cared about her more than that. Did she want to be more than that? She rubbed her forehead and sighed, feeling the effects of beer pong, and sex start to catch up with her. Flyers cologne still hung in the air, and she sighed. It was both enthralling and intoxicating to be in the presence of Tyler Seguin. He funny and good looking, and the charm was always laid on thick for just about anyone. But she didn’t miss the way he seemed to bend over backwards for her in particular. She had always assumed it was because she was a conquest he wouldn’t ever achieve, and here she was completely ruined by him for any other guy going forward.

She felt her phone buzz and pulled it up to see a text.

I really enjoyed last night….but what does this mean for us?

She drummed her fingers on the nightstand and typed out a reply.

Let’s find out later tonight.

From that point on a beautiful and complicated situation was born. While they loved to be around eachother, they kept things under wraps. But the days turned into nights filled with sex, quick meetups after practice and a lot of secrecy.

Now that they were having actual sex, the tension and the flirting was worse than ever. Roope raised his eyebrows at them as the flirty banter between them turned sexual one night, and shook his head.

“Jesus.” He mumbled elbowing Esa who was pretending not to listen “Get a room.” She smiled and leaned in to whisper,

“Maybe we should.” She disappeared through the crowd leaving Tyler to face his friends.

“Are you guys fucking?” Jamie asked squinting at him.

“What? No.” Tyler said. Someone called his name and he was thankful to be pulled from the conversation before he had to lie to them. He was even more anxious to leave this party to Y/N could call his name later that night.

On the edge of my seat/I'll wait for the outcome/If we ever have one (if we ever have one)/Let me take the lead/You follow me closely/But come on and show me (come on and show me)

Let's fuck up the friendship/Come get in my head/Baby, cut the tension/I'm hung by a thread/Maybe it's something/But let's not pretend/Or maybe it's nothing/And this is the end (woo)

We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends/We could never be (oh, no)/We could never be friends (friends)

Tyler felt himself falling hard and fast, something he swore he would never do. Things had changed from the night of the first hookup. The relationship between them began to feel more like dating than friends with benefits. Tyler wasn’t sure how to approach the subject and ask her how she felt, but it had to be said.

“Do you wanna go out on a date?” He blurted out one day, immediately slapping a hand over his mouth.

“What?”

“I said do you want to go out on a date?”

“A date? Like a couple? Tyler I thought this was like a friend-“

“We’ve never been just friends and you know it.” He looked so good, long tattooed arms braced behind him, T-shirt right across his chest. Her feelings for him had gone beyond sex, and way beyond friendship.

“Come on.” He said good naturedly, giving her a smile “Lemme take you out.”

She bit her lip and nodded “Okay Tyler Seguin. Take me on a date. Maybe we’ll never have to be friends again.”

“We could never be friends.”

[beauvibaby]

tough decisions — j.oleksiak

a/n: finally another pcos fic, this is based around my symptoms with it, hopefully it’s relatable to most of you!!

warnings: pcos, anxiety, surgery and mentions of covid

“Hey, babe, I should be there in ten.” Jamie answered cheerfully, assuming you were calling to see how far out he was. “I’m sorry, J.” You mumbled, hiding back a groan at the pain tightening in your lower stomach. “I just don’t feel good tonight, could we reschedule?” You asked, letting out a small wince as you leaned against the counter. “Of course, are you ok? You sound hurt.” The concern in his voice only made you feel worse, you managed to hum in response, “oh.” He mumbled into the phone, clearly picking up your message.

You two had been dating for a little over six months, and now that he thought of it, he couldn’t recall a single time when you were on your period and miserable like this. “Did you want me to come over? I can bring you dinner?” He offered, waiting hopefully for your response, “actually that would be great.” You sighed, wanting nothing more than to take a hot shower and hope the cramps got better once you ate. “I’ll unlock the door for you, I’m going to take a shower.” You told him, adding a soft goodbye and an I love you, he repeated the sentiment, a frown etched onto his face as he stopped to get dinner.

You had just slipped on some loose fitting clothes when you heard Jamie walk in the front door of your apartment, “Y/N?” He called out, smiling when you rounded the corner in a shirt of his that you had stolen “accidentally”. He held a bouquet of flowers in front of him along with a takeout bag from your favorite restaurant, “hi pretty girl.” He murmured when you pouted at him, “I love you.” You sighed, burying your face in his chest, “I love you too.” He chuckled lightly, kissing the top of your head. “Wanna eat something? It’ll make you feel better.” He offered, getting a huff in response, he took it as a yes and walked with you wrapped up in his arms to the table. “It hurts.” You explained with a hiss as you sat down in the chair, reaching for your food, he knew it took a lot for you to admit you were in pain, “is it always this bad?” He asked with furrowed brows, taking a bite of his food as you nibbled on yours, suddenly feeling nauseous and worried eating would make it worse. “When I get it, yeah.” You told him, going on to explain the issues you struggled with, the missed cycles, heavy cycles, cramps, all of it. If you could tell him you love him, you can tell him this.

He nodded as you spoke, absorbing the information you spit out, “m’sorry baby.” He sighed, not liking having to watch you like this. You shrugged, finally forcing some of your food down, some relief coming over you as you had something in your stomach. He didn’t push you any further as he saw the look in your eyes, the way you got quiet, he cleaned up the table, leaving you with your plate as you continued to take bites here and there. “I’m going to go change.” He kissed the top of your head before walking down the hall to your room where he knew he had a pair of sweatpants stashed away.

Well he was in there, he quickly googled what you had told him, pcos was on repeat in his mind so he wouldn’t forget it as he typed it into his phone, he read as much as he could, being sure not to be gone suspiciously long.

He got the gist of it, irregularities, heavier cramps, bleeding, mood swings, particularly sad ones.

Infertility. He pushed that one to the back of his mind, he wanted kids with you and while it was early to say that, he knew you two would figure it out when the time came.

When Jamie came out you were nearly half asleep at the kitchen table, your eyes were heavy and when you looked at him he could see the blankness in them. “You can go home, Jamie, I’m probably just going to go lay down.” You sighed, standing up and clearing your spot. “No, I wanna stay with you.” He answered instantly, giving you a soft smile as spun to face him. “Really?” You couldn’t help but grin, catching him off guard, “of course.” He rolled his eyes with a smile, out stretching his arms for you. “Good, sometimes I’m scared to be alone when it hurts so much.” You whispered up to him, pecking his lips when he leaned down to you. “You know you can call me whenever, even if I’m on a roadie. I’d call you back as soon as I saw it.” He explained to you as you pulled him along towards your bedroom, you nodded as a cramp started up.

“Come here.” He demanded gently, flopping down on the bed and pulling you with him, he adjusted you so you were laying on top of him. He lightly began massaging your lower back, feeling you relax into him. “That feels good.” You hummed, blindly running a hand through his hair, knowing he loved when you did that. He smiled, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“J?” You asked after a while, he’d stopped rubbing your back once you didn’t feel the pain anymore, “yeah?” He shifted slightly, careful not to move you too much. He turned his head to meet your eyes where you were resting on his shoulder. “I left out one thing about it.” You sighed, shuffling yourself to be sitting up more, your boyfriend nodded, although he already knew what you were going to say, he wanted to let you say it. He rested his hand in your lap for you to play with. “Go ahead baby.” He assured you, when you met his soft caring eyes you couldn’t help but get emotional. “It’s super common for pcos to cause infertility and I know we’re not there yet but you deserve to know now, and if–“ you stopped to breathe and the tears started flowing. He rushed to sit up with you, “there’s no ifs, I’m here for the long haul, ok?” He assured you, cupping your face to keep you looking at him. “I already knew that baby, I looked it up while you were eating.” He added, frowning when you cried harder. “You looked it up?” You sniffled, “that’s so sweet!” You groaned, hugging him tightly. He sighed into your hair, “I think you need some sleep.” He laughed, feeling you nod against him.

“Goodnight baby.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead as he laid down with you, relishing in the small smile on your lips as you finally felt at ease for the night.

***

Time had passed, and you both fell into a routine, eventually moving in together once you hit the one year mark. And that was already some time ago.

But over the last few months you both had noticed a change in your symptoms and decided to schedule an appointment with your doctor.

***

Jamie got out of his truck the second he got your text that said you were coming out, due to covid protocols put in place, he was unable to come in with you for your appointment, which made you even more on edge than you thought it would. You figured you’d done it plenty of times before, but knowing that he couldn’t come inside was terrifying.

He watched the doors of the medical center with concern as he rubbed the back of his neck, when he saw you walk out, eyes darting to find him as you shoved your mask into your purse, tears already pricking the corner of your eyes. He stepped forward, taking his weight off the side of his truck as you spotted him, “hey, hey, Y/N.” Jamie mumbled as you wrapped your arms around him in a shaky hug. He felt his heart clench as you cried into his shirt, “baby, talk to me.” He spoke gently, pushing you back enough to meet your eyes. “Surgery.” You squeaked out, you both knew it was a possible outcome, having done the watch and wait method for over a year. He listened intently as you recited nearly everything word for word that the doctor had said.

***

That was three months ago, a simple surgery that plenty of people have and it goes smoothly, turned into a three month process, between the pre op, and the scheduling, and the ultrasounds.

But now, now it was finally time for you to go in, and you were terrified and calm all at once. You weren’t scared for the anesthesia, or for the actual removal of the cysts, you were worried that something would go wrong and they’d have to remove your entire ovary, granted that would still leave you with one, but that didn’t make it any less disheartening.

The doctors had come and made their rounds, each one going over everything with you, over the statistics and the possible complications, only furthering your anxiety. When your gynecologist came in, dressed in her scrubs and ready to have you wheeled off to the operating room, she could see the way you were panicking and squeezing Jamie’s hand tightly. “I know she’s going to be put to sleep, but is there something she can have to take the edge off?” Jamie asked as you looked over with a pleading face. “Yes, of course.” She came over and rested a hand on your shoulder, “you’re going to do great.” She assured you, giving Jamie a reassuring smile as well. The second she left the room you burst into tears, “no baby.” He gave you a soft smile, pulling his mask down to kiss your forehead, “it’s going to be ok, no matter what happens. You’re so tough.” He wiped under your eyes, looking over as the anesthesiologist came in, along with a nurse, “I’m going to give you something to take the edge off, you should feel it pretty quickly alright?” He explained, waiting until you agreed to connect it to your IV.

Jamie watched as you took a couple of deep breaths before looking at him with a much calmer face, he held in a chuckle, “you feeling it baby?” He asked you, giving you one last hand squeeze, you nodded lazily. “Yeah.” You answered, already feeling sleepy, he couldn’t help but smile at how girlish it was making you act, “alright, I love you.” He reminded you with one more kiss to the forehead as they popped the brakes off the bed, “I love you.” You repeated as you stared up at the ceiling, he could tell you had a kind of blank face under your mask. He was just glad to see you not freaking out, as he felt the anxiety transfer to him as they rolled you away, leaving him in the empty room to wait for you.

It felt like an eternity to him, as he knew the surgery was only supposed to take thirty or so minutes, but he also knew they wouldn’t tell him anything until you were already waking up in recovery.

That was nearly three hours later, and he literally jumped to his feet when the doctor came in. She assured him everything went as good as she expected, it was just more difficult to get too, nothing went wrong and you were coming out any moment. He thanked her repeatedly as he felt his heart rate settle, after staring at a wall for so long, he turned to Google and that only worsened his anxiety on why it was taking so long.

When they finally brought you in, you still hadn’t seen the doctor because you had been so out of it, so you instantly looked at him with wide eyes, more awake now. “You did good, baby, don’t worry.” He assured you, standing beside the bed once they locked it in place, the nurse smiled as she charted everything on the computer beside you. “Are you Jamie?” She asked with a giggle, making your face heat up under your mask, “yes.” He answered, not tearing his eyes off you as he could see the puffiness in them from your breakdown earlier. He laced his hand with yours, rubbing it reassuringly as you sighed in relief. “She was asking for you before she could even keep her eyes open.” The nurse told him, earning a soft chuckle from his mouth. “Sounds like her.” He hummed in agreement, tuning into the nurses words as she started telling you what you needed to do before they would let you go, both of them surprised when you did them instantly, the doctor signing off on your release as you seemed more than fit to go home in the care of Jamie.

He was more than attentive to your every need, almost to the point where you got annoyed, but you knew he meant well so you let him do whatever he thought you needed.

You were extremely grateful to have him here with you, knowing that just because you’d gotten it fixed this one time, doesn’t mean it won’t come back. He didn’t let you think like that for long as he brought you back to the present with a gentle kiss to your temple as you leaned on his chest. “S’proud of you.” He mumbled, even though you didn’t do anything, he knew it took a lot for you to make the decision to do this. You didn’t have to answer as you curled further into him, a silent thank you for everything.

taglist: @boqvistsbabe @tortito @2manytabsopen @heybarzy @barzysreputation @yzas-stuff @iwantahockeyhimbo

[laffyraffy]

Disorganized thoughts on No Way Home below the cut.

So, first of all: I loved it.

It's the first MCU Spider-Man film to really feel like a Spidey film, which honestly filled me with way more emotions than I thought it would. Tom's Peter showing so much empathy for the other Spideys' villains went a long way to achieving that. All of the previous Spider-Man films went a long way to humanize the villains and really drive home that these were people who had one bad day. MCU Spider-Man films never. . . Really did that. They didn't go out of their way to completely demonize Vulture or Mysterio, but they didn't go out of their way to make you really feel for them, you know?

Peter defending the bad guys against Strange was so. . . Idk man, that hit hard. Strange was more concerned with fixing the multiverse - which, fair - but Peter was the one to say, "hold on, we can do something, we can help them," which is what Spider-Man is all about! That moment when Otto - on the verge of tears - whispered, "it's quiet, I forgot what that felt like," when Peter installed the new inhibitor chip? Chills.

That being said, I do think it was REALLY WEIRD for Aunt May to encourage Peter to basically "fix" Norman and the others. Like, Peter was right when he said they weren't his responsibility. It was his (and Strange's) responsibility to send them home, sure, but everything else he did was above and beyond. While Peter's empathy is his greatest strength, it's also his greatest weakness because he tends to take on too much.

It's basically one of the reasons I dislike MCU Spider-Man movies so much: every adult in Peter's life act like he isn't still a kid, and it's always bothered the hell out of me. The other movies didn't have this issue because either A) Peter was an adult, or B) no one knew Peter's secret. (Or both.)

I don't think Aunt May should have tried to like, stop him from helping them, or anything like that, but I think maybe their rolls should have been reversed: she should have been reluctant to allow Peter to take on so much responsibility, and Peter should have been the one saying, "I need to help them," from the start. Then Aunt May would be swayed by his optimism and empathy, and agree to help him. It wouldn't have changed the story any. In fact, it would have given even more weight to her last words, when she told Peter he did the right thing.

I also don't know how to feel about May's death. On one hand: it's feels like a lazy subversion of the usual Uncle Ben death. Every damn Spider-Man movie has someone Peter knows/loves die, and it's. . . more than a little predictable, at this point. On the other hand, I do think it was well-done. Peter crouched over her body, begging her to wake up was heartbreaking, especially because she was murdered by someone they were trying to help.

Toby and Andrew were fucking amazing. Everything about all the Peters interacting was everything I wanted: the sincere opening up about all the loss they've all experienced, the goofy jokes, Andrew and Tom being kinda grossed out but fascinated by Toby's organic webs - it was all so wonderful to watch. I could watch an entire movie with just the three of them goofing off and getting up to Spidey hijinks.

Willem and Alfred repeating their famous meme-y lines was such nostalgia bait but my god did I LOVE it. When Otto was holding the arc reactor and said the line AGAIN I kinda wanted to cry because holy shit - Tony really did what Otto was trying to do, and Otto got to see it. (My friend asked me if he was still holding the arc reactor when he went back to his universe and I honestly don't remember? I kinda hope he was TBH, he deserves to be able to reverse-engineer it.)

Seeing five of the Sinister Six was also just - amazing. I really only went into this movie caring about seeing Alfred reprise his role as Doc Ock but literally everyone did such a wonderful job. Willem and Jamie especially were great. Full disclosure: it's been a looong time since I've seen Amazing Spider-Man 2, so I don't remember much about Max, but I genuinely gave a shit about him in this movie.

Peter having a clean slate due to everyone forgetting him is another thing I'm kinda conflicted about. I love it because it really brings MCU Spidey back to his roots: a little guy with great powers who uses them to help other little guys. I also kinda roll my eyes because it feels like they just REALLY wanted to get away from Tom's Peter being Iron Man Jr. in the most drastic way possible.

Also Otto saying, "you're all grown up," to Tobey's Spidey was so 💖😭💖😍 - I literally can't even describe what I felt into words, emojis will have to do. I want fic of Otto mentoring Peter and I want it NOW! Dadtavious is everything I didn't know I wanted until I started seeing fanart for it after the trailers dropped.

Tobey being the one to keep Tom from murdering Norman was so, so, SO good. Norman almost killed Tobey's Aunt May so it was so much more meaningful than if literally anyone else had been the one to stop him. And don't even get me STARTED on Andrew saving MJ from falling the way he couldn't save Gwen. That was something literally everyone saw coming but my GOD that didn't make it any less cathartic. The way MJ asked if he was good and he - with tears in his eyes - said, "yeah" was mmMMMMM good SHIT!!

Overall, though? This is one of the best MCU films they've ever made. It makes me hopeful for future Spider-Man films, which is saying something considering I don't like either of the MCU Spidey films.

I wanna say more but it's 1am, I'm tired, and I have a long shift tomorrow (and the day after that, and the day after that), so I'm going to stop here before I start devolving into utter nonsense.