#like yeah this mf is affecting our rights and other important shit

[vacantgodling]

well that sucks

[actualbird]

Oh god!

I really love the poly headcanons they are so sweet.... (or don't but that's part of it and i think the tot boys+MC deserve all the love the world has to give).

But, liking it or not, our 4 beloved boys are kinda complicated (that's what makes them perfect). Plus I never thought about how people get in poly relationships. So i was thinking, how do you think they all get into a polyrelationship together?

(I really have no idea of how that would happen)

hi, two anons!! im glad you guys liked my nxx team polycule stuff!! i'll answer these in one go, my "headcanon" (in quotes because i think this kinda turned into a character analysis/minific of sorts HAHA) being what first anon asked, How They Get Together.

heads up, wc of this is 1.9k words long so buckle up for a bit of a read jfsjdfkjbf

because first anon, youre right!!! the boys are stupendously complicated which i love so so much but canon has also shown us clearly that each of the boys' quirks and habits and tendencies causes a lot of (mostly played for laughs) friction. the bickering, the backhanded insults, the "im the best one here" preening contests. theyre all SOOOO RIDICULOUS and it is hilarious but yep! the boys r complex!! and that means this beautiful ship, imo, has a lot of phases to get to the actual romantic relationship bit.

how they get together, in my opinion, starts because of mc.

not in the sense that she matchmakes them all, but like.

phase 1 of the nxx team polycule is this:

through being in love with her (which we all know the boys 100% are), each of the boys come to terms with their own flaws and weaknesses. it's very apparent to me in all the story thus far that these boys are flawed as hell, it's very compelling but even more compelling to me is how all of them also do intense mental gymnastics to Not Confront Those Flaws. like, marius is a dickbag always teasing and toeing the line of insincerity, vyn is a controlling mf who always tries to sway situations to his benefit, artem is so repressed to the point that he has genuine trouble with emotions, luke is a self sacrificial bastard and also a huge hypocrite about how no, actually, hes the only one that should be hiding his pain and being dishonest, no dishonesty from other people!! in the beginning of the story, all the boys have their flaws and seem to have just kinda...not addressed how those flaws are harming them and the people around them.

and then mc rolls around and they all fall in love with her. and she sees those flaws and she doesnt let them slide. she challenges the boys in her own ways to see another side of the situation, to acknowledge what theyre doing. she doesnt want to get rid of flaws, thats impossible and also not cool. she just has this beautiful hope for like, all of humanity, that goodness can prevail with the right work. so when she sees her beloved nxx boys, she believes that for them as well.

which leads to phase 2 of the nxx team polycule:

the boys, more aware of themselves, become more aware of each other.

they werent Unaware of the others of course. it's just that they didnt like...truly connect on a personal level just yet. they saw the other teammembers with their emotional armor and flaws and saw a wall that wasnt worth looking past.

but after mc makes them realize that hey, flaws arent the end of the world actually, it's alright and the person behind them may just be worth it, the boys like. end up understanding the others. A LOT OF THIS BIT IS UNINTENTIONAL, ON THEIR PARTS KJDSBFS. like they stumble into understanding each other by accident, they didnt plan it, but over the course of nxx investigations, it's inevitable that they end up seeing the depths of the others. i delve into this a little bit in my fanfic "filler eps of the lost gold" where the boys are just going thru their actions and then trip over another boy's fears or desires and through that, gain a deeper understanding mutually.

and with understanding, sometimes, comes trust.

phase 3 of the nxx team polycule goes like this:

everybody in this team, whether they like it or not, whether they know it or not, has a heart that wants to give love so desperately.

marius lives in a world full of snakes so he cant have his heart on his sleeve for his own protection. vyn wants to be seen as perfect and the heart is inherently messy so he holds it back. artem for a very very long time was focused on work and success and achievement that he neglected his heart. and luke has been giving love all his life in a sense but in a way thats hidden.

all these tendencies that are brought upon their life circumstances results in this: they want to love honestly but they havent been able to do this

until mc. and all of them want to push back whatever fears or patterns their life has instilled in them because they see her and see somebody so unwaveringly good that all their hearts begin giving love to her to make her happy and to make themselves happy as well.

but heres the thing. the boys dont just see mc. by this point, they have connected and understood and come to trust each other as well, and the consequence of that is that They Can See Each Other Now Too, Truly.

and heres the thing. all of the boys are unwaveringly good as well.

one by one, each of the boys realize that what they feel for the other boys in the team starts to...change. yeah theyre all friends, they pick on each other a lot of the time, but the bedrock of the relationship is solid and strong now. but when marius is with luke, marius sees a light inside of luke so bright that he seems unaware that he gives off. when artem is with vyn, artem sees a goodness inside of vyn that hesitates to make itself obvious and known because vyn is scared of getting hurt thanks to it. all of them see the other and their goodness and, unbidden, their hearts want to give love to each other as well.

and because theyre all a bit stupid in their own way theyre like, huh, weird! wonder why this feeling is so familiar! and yet i cant seem to name it...and then they all independently compare these feeling with the feelings they have for mc, a feeling they do know the name of, and theyre like.

WAIT.

THESE FEELINGS ARE...VERY BASICALLY EXACTLY WHAT I FEEL FOR MC.

which only means one thing: theyve fallen in love with everybody else

marius: //goes to his studio to Think and sees that a bunch of his recent art actually had little crumbs of these feelings already, etched into the brushstrokes and scenes. has an emotional crisis about it

vyn: //records a 1 hour long entry in his audio diary to examine and gain control of his feelings but by the end of the hour all he knows is that he wants to hold these people and be held by them

artem: //quite literally just bluescreens, artem.exe has stopped working, sits at his study and slowly, slowly, thunks his head down onto his desk, valiantly trying to ignore the fast pulse of his heart

luke: //manically vents about it to peanut who, by virtue of being a bird, doesnt get it. just keeps talking at peanut to get a grasp of it all and then lies down on the floor, overwhelmed

mc, sitting in her apartment watching some netflix: ...why do i inexplicably feel as if something very, very important has just happened?

phase 4 of the nxx team polycule is basically:

pining: extreme difficulty level

because pining is already hard when ur pining for one person. what more for an additional 3 more people. and those additional 3 more people are pining back.

and all these boys are SOOOO OBVIOUS with their romantic feelings, in their own special way. the way they show their affection to mc starts to bleed into their interactions with the others and everybody can CLEARLY SEE WHAT IS GOING ON, LOL, but also all the boys are too chickenshit to confront it, because if they confront it, what will even happen??? being in love with each other, all of them, thats going to be such a complicated fucking relationship, holy shit. it's 2030, yeah, being a polyamorous group relationship isnt completely unheard of, but sue them, theyre scared.

but mc (who i forgot to mention already knows of the boys' romantic feelings for her, shes just hasnt made a move yet on any of them because SHES IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM AS WELL and shes been trying to figure out how the hell to make that work, she cant bear to choose just one of them, she'd be heartbroken over leaving the rest of them behind) sees that the nxx investigation team is now all pining for each other FULLY and she kinda wants to laugh when she realizes whats going on because like, what are the chances? that this would happen? that they all found each other and their feelings fell into just the right place for nobody to be left behind?

theyre all scared, she can tell. and she is as well, she wont lie.

but shes always had a belief that goodness can prevail with the right work.

and love is one of the greatest goods out there.

phase 5 of the nxx team polycule:

It's Time For Communication, Baby!!!!!

the exact scenes of how this happens is a bit vague to me. it could go two ways: mc going to each of the boys independently to talk about feelings, hers about everybodys and his about everybodys as well. OR they have a fucking meeting about it all together and artem literally schedules it in his google calendar, or something.

either way, they like, actually talk about this. starts casual, maybe over a chill date, maybe over dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe over a walk in the park as the sun is starting to set. but where ever it happens, the end result is the same: a heart is laid out bare and it is taken in gentle, grateful hands.

marius: OKAY, NOW THAT THE FEELINGS ARE OUT OF THE WAY, CAN I PLEASE KISS ONE OR ALL OF YOU, PLEASE, IVE BEEN WANTING TO KISS U GUYS FOR FOREVER

vyn, laughing fondly: has anybody ever told you patience is a virtue? we quite literally just talked it all out.

marius: //needy whining noises

artem, embarrassed: ive...never kissed anybody before

luke, embarrassed but trying to play it Cool: ....same here

mc: kissing is great, you two will love it!

marius: awesome, awesome, so is ANYBODY going to give me a go ahead or WHAT????

phase 6 of the nxx team polycule:

i dont want to say it's happily ever after, once they all get together. thats not really realistic.

they all have their quirks and tendencies and habits. and those will inevitable clash against each other. theyll have their arguments, theyll get upset, theyll sulk and be angry, sometimes. but also...

theyll see each other smile and feel like their love shining so brightly. theyll reach out for another's hand and be held in such a way that makes them think that their heart is in a safe place. theyll love each other and theyll put in the work to continue loving each other. because goodness will prevail.

and they all see each other as the most good people in the world.

so whatever happens, theyll get through it together.

[smugraccoon137]

Supergirl Season 2 episode 8 Medusa review part 2

If your curious part 1 was just my breakdown of Kara and Mon-els relationship that got way too long. But as always SPOILERS AND GAY THOUGHTS AHEAD

Me and kel get so excited when Lenas in an episode. Like practically giddy. I can’t help smiling when shes on screen honestly. And yes Katie McGrath is beautiful, but beyond that such a pretty smile and lovely voice. I’m sure ratings started to spike when she joined the cast. Okay enough about pretty girls on to the review 

Tipsy fucking Alex though guys I can’t get over this mess of a person. 

Alex: if I have to come out to my mom then I choose to do it drunk

Kara: no your not *yoinks beer*

Alex: wait no my coming out juice

Kara Danvers sneaky sneaker extraordinaire can totally interview Lena and find out Cadmus things without anyone knowing. The confidence this goofball has is top tier

Underrated relationship: Alex and Winn though. I really really love Winn and honestly Alex is such big sister energy to both him and Kara. 

wow Lenas pretty in the interview scene. A touch of auburn hair from the sunlight really makes this shot and we never get to see her with her hair down. Fan service honestly, or maybe she heard a certain beef cake reporter was gonna come by and wanted to dazzel her.

Lena: hair up is for business. Hair down is for flirting friendship time with Kara

Poor baby thinks she falls short nooooo. Your doing your best godamn your only like 25 jesus. Kara give her a hug she needs love and affection

Kara thinks shes being so sneaky in this interview. Such a golden retriever, bad at sneakin. As soon as she toes the line Lena catches on and kicks her out. Really good acting in the scene, the subtle change in expression to show Lenas guard raising. Good job Katie.

Real quick Lena why is your office so ugly? How do you keep it clean? You spend 99% of your days in this place and its whiter than a hospital room. I hate it. Why is your desk an oval? and why does it have a hole in it? Kara cant eat you out in secret anymore damn. 

OOHHHhhhh noooo the fucking gas bomb in the bar what the fuck. EVERYBODIES DEAD JESUS WHAT WAS THAT

Poor Mon-el. What happened at the bar was fucked up, and he feels like its fault when its obviously not.

Love that he and Kara are having bro time playing some Monopoly. Oh no not Kara asking if he likes her. Honestly thought these two had good chemistry in this scene. Im a sucker for dumbass not understanding certain words and phrases. So Kara having to reiterate her questions and finally being like “You don’t want to mate with me do you?” was super fun. Omegaverse vibes mfs. Although I am confused by mon-els reaction “I mean have you seen the kind of women I’ve been attracting?” I honestly don’t know what this means.

Kara internal reaction though: Oh thank god

Wow Kara really just has no regard for her own life, huh? she just opens the door and possibly contaminates herself. It’s good to want to help people, but love you gotta care about yourself too

Good reveal with the fortress of solitude. Oof Kara gonna feel like its her fault all those aliens died and mon-els sick. They do a really good job of showing Karas relationship with her parents through their holograms. She wants so badly to see them again, to talk to them. And she can, but not really. They just aren’t real.

Lena cattily to her mother: im used to celebrating holiday weekends alone at my desk

me to Kara: please invite her to thanksgiving

Okay so Lena being adopted is another interesting parallel to Kara. Also the fact that both Kara and Lena fall into there families shadows, and are left behhind or forgotten. Really interesting how Lena and Karas relationship is so similar to Clark and Lex’s for obvious purposes. Though the CW queer coding the fuck out of their relationship in Smallville really only adds to Supercorp fever. Its always been Homoerotic subtext Harold!

Me watching Lena and Lillian trade verbal blows: Wow ya’lls relationship is fucked up. Lex and Lionelle would spar and fence but you two are on another level jesus

oooooof that last line. 

Lena: I know your lying

Lillian: and how could you possibly know that?

Lena: because you told me you loved me. And we both know thats not true

Who wrote this jesus fuck my heart. The PAIN.

Bonus thought Lena thinks Karas smart. Goofball beefcake sneaky sneakster who doesnt know the difference between flirting and friendship is smart she thinks. I love these idiots

Wow Kara just doesn’t wait huh? Oh cadmus is going to be at LCorp? Not on my watch. Lena’s there. I know this because I tune into her heart beat just to check on her cus she likes to work late. Don’t worry Alex it’s for friendship reasons.

That LCorp security guard got princess carried for .2 seconds. Best moment of his life.

God its like dark out. Lenas working on a holiday weekend into the night. I hate this, give her friends.

Lena looks so scared when Kara gets thrown into the giant LCorp sign

And then hurt Kara looking up at her with dread.

Kara internal: fuck don’t come out now. I came here to save you

God I love the protectiveness. Its *chefs kiss*. Hank throwing the beam at Lena and Kara even in her hurt state throwing herself in front of it. Sometimes self sacrifice is gay. But how Lena looks at her after wards like “I can’t believe I’m alive. I can’t believe she chose to save me”. Met with a gruff “Get out of here!”. mm yes this is my kind of content. Fight for me.

I was robbed an aftercare scene but I doubt it will be the last time. (*COUGHS* the “im leaving” phone call *COUGHS*)

Talking about the virus Eliza: what about Lena Luthor?

Kara: What about her?! (super defensive is also a super power maam)

Winn: Luthors can be pretty good actors

Kara: No, I looked into LENAS EYES. She doesn’t know anything about cadmus or her mother

J’onzz: Would you stake Mon-els life on that?

well I guess that really puts Lena and Mon-el right next to each other in priorities huh? Which one is more important? 

Wow Lena totally has a crush on Supergirl after that. Flustered dork. 

Lena: *laughs nervously* you know that doors not really an entrance

Kara: *upsettit stone face pupper*

Lena: :,) 

Okay but the way Lena just says “Anything” all breathless and helpful when Kara says she needs her help. Shes crushin hard

Kara tells Lena her mother is in charge of Cadmus. 

Lena: >:(

Annnd the crush is dead. That did not last long. Really love that Lena has such a different relationship with Kara vs Supergirl though, good dynamic having her reactions so different. Which I believe actually relates as a Clark and Lois parallel? Seeing as how Lois has two separate relationships with Clark and Superman. 

OOf the way Lenas throat bobs with genuine sadness because who she thought Supergirl was is wrong. Shes just like the rest of them. Thinks Lena is just another crazy Luthor. It hurts

Kara: I know what its like to be disillusioned by our parents, but Im a pretty good judge of character, and you are not like your mother. She is cold and dangerous. And you are too good and too smart to follow in her path. Be your own Hero.

Wow just what a good line. They are capable of some things here and there arent they? Melissa's delivery on this is excellent. And the way Katie McGrath is able to show such depth of sadness and bitterness even from a shot of her BACK is really cool. Great acting in this scene in particular. And I can see why the “desperation to be good” is such a highlighted part of these two relationship. Its the one thing in common between Lena and Supergirl, the place where they can meet in the middle. And the way Lena looks after her as she leaves! AHHH thats the good shit, the pining

Okay big Mon-el scene in coming so if you dont want to hear my ranting skip over this part. 

Funny how as soon as Kara has this big impactful scene with Lena full of tension and emotion the writers were like: shit we almost forgot Mon-els dying. 

Kara: *staring sadly back into Lenas office kind of wanting to go back in*

Writers: *cough cough* KARA He’s DYINGGGG

Kara: Oh shit right. Mon-el Oh no. My *looks at poorly written handwriting on her palm* romantic interest?

Wow Mon-el looks like shit, poor guy. Someone swaddle this pillow princess and get him some soup.

Heres a question. Kara is visibly upset that Mon-el is dying. Is it because she’s sad that the guy shes likes is dying. Because her friend is dying? Because her father created the virus thats killing him (what the writers want us to think)? Or because no matter what Kara does the people she loves keep falling through the cracks and shes helpless to stop it?

Her parents. Clark. Her adoptive father. Now Lena. Now Mon-el. Why can’t she ever do anything? Why is it always her fault? This poor kid has some deep seeded abandonment issues

Mon-el: you know you look beautiful with the weight of all these worlds on your shoulders.

I do remember my reaction here, cus I thought this was a weird line. A line that was obviously meant to be romantic and complimentary, but it felt unsettled in my stomach. Coming back and watching the scene it sits even more uncomfortably there. He obviously means well, but this line is kind of just shitty. Its a very selfish and unthoughtful thing to say to someone. 

Kara’s entire fucking life has revolved around other people and making sure they are happy and taken care of. But having “failed” at such a young age to do the impossible things asked of her (carrying on Kryptons legacy, raising Clark) she overcompensates. Any normal person would just make their life revolve around their family and friends, not healthy but it works. But Kara feels responsibility over an entire world of lost people and lives. So the amount she overcompensates is ungodly. She does have the weight of worlds on her shoulders. This is not a joke or hyperbole. Its just her life. And thats so fucking shitty. And to have someone actually see that and acknowledge it. To make it a reality so to speak. Then to have them say “yeah you look good like this” while you’re a shaking Atlas being crushed. It is just a little too much isn’t it? That pain to have someone see you finally, and then completely miss the point. For them to go “oh wow your so strong. your so brave” instead of “let me help you. you shouldn’t have to do this at all, forget by yourself. But now I am here”. 

I imagine this was the scene that crowned my darling himbo boy Mon-Hell? Which is so unfortunate. I hope Im wrong, but I feel that his character might just end up a big missed opportunity

I want everyone to know that me and Kel screamed through the entire enxt few seconds of the scene. We knew the kiss was coming from how they were building it up. But god was it painful, especially for it to be delivered after a line like THAT. But yeah very loud angry screaming

Also not to be that bitch but Kara and Mon-els scene was a total of 1:53 RT, and Kara and Lenas ran at a 1:57 RT. Just sayin...

No Lena don’t be evil thats too sexy...

Okay but the way that Lena just tricks Lillian is so good. Shes so clever. And added bonus she makes her ask for her help, which is nice actually. Lillian's obvious vice is weakness and that is often shown in embarrassment. A woman like this asking for help borders that line of weakness and its nice to see on such a dislikable character. Lena didn’t just get what she wanted she got a point over her mother.

Lena looks good in the purple coat. Repeat she is pretty

Love the mental chess game between Lena and Lillian. Lena offering help right off the bat and giving her the isotope free of charge. And then Lillian making Lena launch the virus to prove herself. Good stuff.

Kara appears: don’t do it Lena!

Lena: why not? im a luthor

Okay so obviously Lena switched the Isotope and the Virus won’t work. But thats what makes this line so perfect. Throwing it back in Supergirls face. Like “Yeah, Im a luthor. And Ill show you what im capable of.” But instead of mass death and destruction Lena saves the day. She saved thousands of lives, and its because shes a Luthor that she was able to do that. Really nice way to full circle that 

Wow Lillian really just starts booking it without Lena, huh? bitch

I really love the scene of the virus falling all around National City. The choice of an orangish snow falling was a really really good one. Paired with some excellent music for the mid season finale.

Its sad but I do love Hank just being ready and at peace with death. Im sure he misses his wife and daughters. 

Okay but Lena calling the cops is tea. Send your mom to jail honey. 

So we’re really not gonna talk about how Lena saved everyones asses? Like don’t you think Supergirl would want to talk to the woman that A) kind of tricked her, and B) saved National City. Thats just what makes sense??? But no we’re going to ignore that the DEO is a kind of shit at their job sometimes. And that the woman that they were accusing of having a part to play in all the xenophobic shit is the one who did their job. BY HER SELF. 

Okay rant over. This was a long one review dear god. Really really good episode though. I enjoyed rewatching all the scenes even if it was a mixed bag of feelings. Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed all the screaming!

[animatedrapture]

I HAVE GASOLINE LAYING AROUND IN MY HOUSE AND IM OMW TO SET KANA ON FIRE :))))

ok im about to compile possibly like 10 chapters worth of kana hate KJHLDSDJS

so. sorry i wasnt able to respond to so manyyyyyy of these on time and all, i get overwhelmed super easily but i truly, truly love all of you and appreciate each msg :DD these have all either made me think real hard LMFOAHJSKD or had me laughing so hard and gasping lmfao. but yeah, i appreciate all of these and everything i mightve never gotten bc tumblr asks is dumb as well as the ones ive still yet to come back to or answer. almost each and every single one of these have been a guidance with what i wanted to do with the smau, whenever i wanted to switch something up or make something better in the smau, your msgs helped a lot in improving it in some way and helping me figure out what i truly wanted to do with the smau and for that, thank u!!!

Anonymous asked:

FUCK KANA ALL MY HOMIES HATE HER HANA SPILLED HER DRINK ON HER? SHE DID THE RIGHT THING ALSO FUCK SUNA BC EVEN UF HE HAD SEX WITH YN AND SAID HE ADORES HER HIS ACTIONS/AFFECTION TOWARDS KANA GIVES MIXED SIGNALS AND ITS TIME HE GET ACCOUNTABLE OF SAID ACTIONS sorry for the rant 🥴

Anonymous asked:

the “tw kana” absolutely sent me into orbit i cackled 😭

Anonymous asked:

anons bonding over kana hate🤝🏻🤝🏻🤝🏻

Anonymous asked:

yeah its only you who doesn't dislike her FGHDJGKUJ IM KIDDING no but really more than hate her its hate the way shes in between like it pisses me off the cockblock she is 😭😭

Anonymous asked:

if i were kana,,,i would either tell him i still have feelings OR hurt in silence (step back) since technically he or should i say they decided to be JUST bestfriends not cockblocking the possibility for him to be in a relationship

Anonymous asked:

kana has to make a choice: she confess or shut the fuck up bc as far as we know they decided to be just bff (highkey think suna was more into being just friends and kana kinda lied) so IF he likes someone else why the fuck try to sabotage him (his happiness with someone else) when he find it out then what? would he still keep her as a friend? 🧐

Anonymous asked:

What if I just...shift or whatever you guys call it, into As Friends universe...and bonk Kana on the head...lol just kidding...ah ha ha ha No please she is starting to sound like the girl best friend that would make couples break up because she does not care about boundaries...honey, you're the best friend, yes, you're important, but that's his girlfriend...stay in your lane. Lol like "I don't want to confess" but "He's mine so I have to get rid of all competitions" lol fucking clown yeah no, I don't have to wait for you to write more about her to make me hate her sksksksksk I already do

Anonymous asked:

Ayo istg kana's been giving y/n the stinky eye... if she stares at y/n like that one more time LAWD HELP HER SOUL, im coming for her eyes!!! But fr,, Rin better treat y/n right and put kana in her place. Bc y/n got a best friend too (samu) u^u and he can cook and would treat her good.

Anonymous asked: likE I KEEP SAYING eAT SHIT KANA

Anonymous asked: I am CRAVING IMMENSE VIOLENCE bring that girl kana here lemme knock her teeth down her throat. >:(

Anonymous asked:

kana (derogatory)

Anonymous asked:

istg if a bus doesn’t hit kana i’m gonna do it

Anonymous asked:

kana toxic best friend it’s time for suna to realise IT 😤😤

Anonymous asked:

kana has family problems only rin knows about? what in the ao haru ride manga 😐

Anonymous asked:

WHY KANA FUKC

Anonymous asked:

NAH MY GUT FEELING TELLING ME KANA WAS BAD NEWS SINCE THE BEGINNING also she wants suna all to herself (he sees her as a bff) but doesn’t say shit to him... if course he’s gonna find someone in the future whether in college or after (unless the bitch will still to his ass even when he goes pro)

Anonymous asked:

everyday i wake up with notifs from u i feel like im about to get subjected to pain and IM RIGHT THIS TIME TOO what the hell kana u will never be yn (me) 🙏🏼🧇

Anonymous asked:

bro part of me wants to punch suna so bad bc like hes so awkward but so smooth like who tf do u want stop being a smooth ass mf u know these two bitches like u

Anonymous asked: i might just obliterate everyone named kana cause of as friends THE WHOLE TIME MY EYE WAS TWITCHING CAUSE OF HER FUCK KDDSKDLSDK EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO OBLITERATE HER SAY "I" but like hi! i hope youre well

Anonymous asked:

even tho u always insist you'd never het mad at me girl HUHH i used to be genuinely good w kana now she's just a manipulative bitch :// kana babe sorry but ur best friend is allowed to spend time with other people 🙄

xmyshya asked:

I 👏 love 👏 Hana 👏 Also 👏 fuck 👏 Kana 👏 and Rin you idiot, what do you mean he's not gonna pursue dating T_T it's just a few chapters till the end T_T wut T_T

yourstarvic asked:

Kana needs to back up before she gets beat up 😤 me and my homies ain’t playing no more 😤

Anonymous asked:

omg that ur probably mad (even tho u said u’d never get mad at me!) broooo

Anonymous asked:

kana gonna get even more territorial in the next chapters im getting kinda scared to see how rin reacts 😒 shes gonna lowkey (highkey) manipulate rin like oh u said youll never leave me you said i come first and all that mhmmm girl dont make me break your neck 👎🏼👎🏼

Anonymous asked:

huh so is kana basically a pick me girl

Anonymous asked:

“you’d be selfish abt this” girl

Anonymous asked:

why tf kana gotta ask yn bro u don't know her just ask suna directly 🙄 putting her in an awkward ass position how's she supposed to say no i'm sorry kana's being annoying as hell rn

Anonymous asked:

it’s time for kana to realise: - yn aint just a fling bc suna is spending more time with her - suna clearly sees her just as his bff

Anonymous asked:

Kana saying "I was worried you'd be selfish about this haha" well bitch now I gotta be 😒

Anonymous asked:

“i was worried you’d be selfish about this hahaha” -the one who’s for the streets kana better watch herself…y/n was being kind, i will not be

Anonymous asked:

DID KANA REALLY HAVE THE NERVE TO ASK US?????? TO POSTPONE OUR PLANS WITH RIN???? pls that « you understand, right? » was just so manipulative oh my god-

Anonymous asked:

kana can go cry & write to her diary about it 😘😘

Anonymous asked:

“y/n right?” after literally meeting her plssss

Anonymous asked:

miss kana is just gonna have to miss him a little more bc i'm not canceling SHIT!!

Anonymous asked:

kana is playing chess while we’re playing checkers

Anonymous asked:

everytime you post and kana gets fucked over my day is made and it all I'm going to think about

Anonymous asked:

im catching up on as friends bc i havent read a few chapters and kana saying “arent you just with yn” made me extra angry go trip down some stairs kana

Anonymous asked:

u made my week with the update 😭🖤 i hate kana sfm lol

Anonymous asked:

kana suffering either way the story goes? I'm in -🦄

Anonymous asked:

kana n suna need to grow up lowkey it’s very highschool

Anonymous asked:

WHOEVER SENT THIS I AM CHOOSING VIOLENCE who's in, let's go beat kana-🦄

Anonymous asked:

hELL YEAAHH GET FUCKED KANA /neg

[txthots]

An estimation and analysis of Yeonjun’s chart

-virgo sun, scorpio moon- [See this is why it took me so long to get his chart out- Personally i think that he also exhibits some libra moon sign traits too in the way he comforts those he cares about (ex; the time beomgyu cried and he was the first one to come and comfort him). But in order for me to get his rising sign to be aquarius the time had to match up accordingly, but I also do see him having a scorio moon, too (i have a scorpio moon i feel like we share a lot of the same feelings). plus his moon is riiiggghhtt there next to libra, like one degree away so really with the time i feel like we can take both moon signs into considerations. After all, this is just an estimation!]

okay so. virgo sun males? greedy in bed. same for libra sun males, but the thing is, virgo suns tend to be more apparent about it; they’re picky as shit too. with his sun in virgo and his moon in either scorpio or libra (for the sake of convenience let’s just agree that he’s a scorpio moon) he is most likeluy a fuckboy. Probably got his feelings hurt once and just be getting his dick wet left and right, and then be like “oh that one girl in like the 8th grade really messed me up bro.” sike fkajrgsrrjkn probably not to that extent. We dont know if he really is one by just looking at his birth chart, but just know that the fuckboy potential is there! Scorpio moons are also very intense in bed, and then virgo suns are just into that kinky shit. these two together.... whew the DRIVE on this boy. wait till i get to talking about his venus.

-aquarius rising. I feel like he has an aquarius rising because of his sense of style and the way he carries himself. He’s got some kind of cocky air about him(not in a bad way, he just knows who he is and he’s confident in himself and his abilities). Not in the same way as like, say a leo rising would, but it a more subtle and less loud way. For example, in their first showcase that they were doing in america, the rest of the members were freaking out because it was one of their first real performances as a group... but all Yeonjun kept saying was “We’ll do good. Don’t worry.” cool as a cucumber. Confident. sexy.

that being said he’s confident in his abilities and he’s got this ambition that doesn’t seem to quit so. like i said his DRIVE. hes probably got stamina for DAYS, dog. But just be aware that aquariuans (or at least, most aquarians I know) have this complication with wanting to be loved and having attention/wanting a LOT of space. The ones I have experience with generally don’t like to show much affection and are very shy with it, so if you’re looking for aftercare then you’d probably have to initiate it and he’d probably be awkward with it and kwEKJFS WAIT TILL I GET TO HIS VENUS IM GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL MORE ABOUT THIS OKAY

-mercury in virgo. Oh god lol. If he don’t like something you will surely hear about it. But i don’t think he’s the type to nitpick at something youre self conscious about, just things he knows that you can easily fix within five minutes. my mom is a mercury in virgo. just know that if you do something weird in bed he will call you out on it when you two are alone and when he wants an upper hand... “you say im weird but you did that thing with your feet like 2 nights ago what the fuck was that? Yeah? That’s what i thought shut up.” Also. Puts you in your place. sharp with his words and says all the right things. Probably into dirty talk and will definitely be the one to initiate something kinky between you two. His mercury is also in the 7th house, so he definitely like’s hearing his partner’s feedback!!! Very important to him.

-Venus in leo. venus square saturn. And venus in the 7th house..... LORD. okay. SO venus in leo is definitely a great place to have your venus in!! Leo venuses can go all out for their lovers, give big and grand displays of affection, and be super attentive and genuine. definitely one of my favorite venus placements. these are the type of people who will go all out for their partner, most likely are more into giving than receiving, and just LOVE to take their time with their partner.... HOWEVER. his venus is square his saturn.......... LISTEN. lISTEn. I’ve dated a person who has their venus in leo but their venus was square saturn, just like Yeonjun’s. All i can say is that sex was amazing. Very intense, very pleasurable, it felt very genuine, and then it was kinky as all hell and the STAMINA. I was edged MULTIPLE times, and i think the longest time we went on was about 4-5 hours(you have to take into account that this person has different placements as yeonjun though, so other factors could probably come into play with that being said). felt like i was on cloud nine most of the time and i’d finish overstimulated and shaking and sweaty. BUT it was a VERY off and on thing. people with venus square saturn on their natal charts tend to be very closed off with their romantic feelings and their relationships in general. It doesn’t mean that they’re incapable of love, because they definitely are capable! it’s just that it’s very hard for them to continue expressing it without feeling uncomfortable. for example, do you guys remember that one time where txt were in new york, and all the fans crowded around them and showed them a lot of love? It seemed that all the other members were amazed by it, and of course him receiving that kind of love can give him a warm feeling but it can also make him very uncomfortable. He looked like he wanted to get out there real quick and i noticed that he wasn’t saying a lot... I felt that he liked it, but he wasnt in the condition to project how he felt! But of course our yeonjun has moments where he is very flirtatious and loyal to MOA (just as a leo venus would) and truly does love them, so that kind of balance is something that he has to work out in his saturn return.

-sag mars, mars conjunct pluto, mars in the 10th house. FIrey sex, literally. Sagittarius is a fire sign and they just know how to take charge. ho god, his future partner is going to be so lucky. takes the lead, is spontaneous, overall just sexy. He’s also so confident to begin with, and on top of that he’s got his mars conjunct pluto, so he’s intense, he’s passionate, and he’s got this inner strength (both physical and inner strength). he will break you. period. Both pluto and mars being rulers of scorpio, there’s a very scorpio feeling about his sexual nature and dare i say....... yeonjun is mf hung................... anyway his mars being in the 10th house, he knows he is passionate and he wants to be recognized for it. But he can get carried away, and he needs to work on balance (for example, he needs to show you he loves you with ways other than his dick!).

oh god, my head hurts. Okay

-jupiter in taurus in retrograde, in the 2nd house. Puts high value in money, food, and good sex. If you can’t put it down right he might just be gone lol. definitely an ass man. again, he has a tendency to take things to excess and needs to find a good balance.

-saturn in retrograde in the 3rd house in taurus. this just further perpetuates the idea that has a hard time expressing himself. don’t expect him to get all loveyy dovey lol. If he has a one night stand dont expect any kissing or cuddling after lol

-uranus in aquarius, conjunct his ascendant, in retrograde and in the first house. I think this makes him uranus dominant and aquarius dominant? wild when he dont care about people he really just dont care. Idk how else to put it. anyway for one, this makes him has a rebel attitude. He probably gets off on the fact that like, your parents or your best friend dont like him lol. has a bit of a 4d personality, and AGAIN, another aspect that further perpetuates that he cannot fully express himself. i feel so sorry for this man because i have a 3rd house stellium..... could not be me.

-jupiter and moon square neptune, neptune in retrograde, neptune in the 1st house in aquarius. highly in tune with your feelings. Perceptive and sympathetic. He knows what makes you feel good without you even having to say it. You could bring something up that you really liked that he did last night and he would be like “yeah, I noticed i should probably do that more often.” very creative in bed too.

-neptune, ascendant, and uranus sextile pluto, pluto in the 10th house, pluto in sag. a bit of a control freak lol.  sex is probably a spiritual thing for him or something. definitely a dom, idk why i didnt say that earlier because so many things on this dudes chart screams dom. his power... this dude is literally so transformative. im serious. You know that song.... i feel like a whole.... brand... new.. bitch....... thats you after one night with yeonjun sfiuhewhK. also a crative genius in every aspect. incredibly ambitious

-lilith in sag, lilith in retrograde, lilith in the 10th house. Likes foreign partners. prolly got a hoe in every state, county, country, he been to ngl. his karmic duty is to have more faith in others and trust a little better. again, a bit of a rebel

[floralkittygambler]

Reposting for reasons

Response to Honest’s post here: Doing this to spread this awareness more as I know theres a bit of a rift in the critical community - plus I really fucking go on. Im PISSED and I do apologise however it NEEDS urgent addressing. I know people will hate me for it but Im used to hate and honestly? Hating rather than helping to solve the issue only furthers my fucking point here. So yeah this is so more people are aware (no offense to any of those involved in said rift either, but this is an important message. Thank you for understanding and if I can do anything to make all sides comfortable, then please message me and I’ll do my upmost.) “ More awareness of this is needed. Even if it’s your favourite, you can’t justify their shit but rally against another’s shit. Have people tell you you’re experiences arent real or invalid because, like Husk, people have - in real life - shipped you with someone you are far from comfortable with but you still treat them like a person. Because you have basic respect. And people force you to accept harassment, touching, stalking, advances for THEIR satisfaction. People use you for their fantasies. But you’re just a ‘tsundere’ for it. Or you have addiction issues but people think being with another addict will ‘save’ you because you’re apparently too incompetent to save yourself. Love isnt some magic fuckin cure so stop romanticising it as a fuckin saviour. It’s gross and fuckin creepy. Get stalked and have someone NEVER accept your no just because you show youre still decent enough to not treat them shitty or any different from anyone else. Try having someone way older or way younger (both in morally fucked up ways) advance on you and people encourage that. People you’re supposed to feel safe around.

People touch you when you pull away or show discomfort. Follow you home. Have pictures of you and wont accept you dont like them like that and it’s not ‘playing hard to get’ or ‘the thrill of the chase’. Fuck. OFF. In fact, Im not only disappointed in the fandom. Im disappointed in the entire team who some should know better from their OWN personal experiences - or at least the bare minimal of being a fucking adult. Im disappointed in especially females (sorry idk whether girl or woman is more appropriate here-) who statistically are more likely to have experienced something similar at some point in their lives think this is a cute gay moment. No. Angel is made out as a fucking predator - Im not saying he is, Im saying that his persistence is very fucking unwelcome like one. People like Husk dont need that fucking invasiveness. They/We need patience and someone on our level. Angel’s I know are the fuckin polar opposite - and some of them I know are very sexually harassing, including unwanted touching. It’s a shitty way to present gay people. Gays are fuckin people. Some are cunts and some arent. It’s a HUMAN thing. But considering the shit theyve been subjected to, presenting a gay as a victim only to also show them as a perpetrator is insulting! And for those Ive seen argue this about how people like AD wouldnt know how to express their love normally and whatnot? His pig. His best friend. He’s in his fucking 30s. There are literal real life criminals who get molested as kids and then go on to molest kids. Not all who grow up like that turn into nonces. Stop just fucking STOP justifying and romanticising this bullshit! I used to see the good in AD but now he makes me fucking sick. Especially with my verrrrrry fucking real traumas and connections. But fuck me, eh? Because this fictional guy matters so much more. Fuck real victims. And whilst we’re at it, fuck AD too when it suits your fetishes! Sarcasm aside, the fans and the team need to straighten up their abhorrent behaviour. Stolas. Fucking clearly having an affair, knowingly fucking up his daughter’s mental health and bribing a guy into sex who only wants the book and nothing more. He even has a fucking warning button over Stolas- Guys, how do you think any of this is cute? Even the team gross me out- I genuinely see potential and talent and it’s all gone to shit to satisfy horny teens, horny adults, and literally everyone who doesnt for the life of them understand being an adult is more than sex, drugs, violence and swears! I REALLY want to keep enjoying HB/HH but it’s getting harder and harder with such ignorant and bordering lazy creators (note: lazy as in wont do the fucking research or actually listen to real criticism and victims), such despicable fans (yeah, some HDers fuckin mocked that they triggered my ED, yet they had the fucking NERVE to support Angel’s potential ED AND laugh and blame me for me getting treated so badly for actually having the balls to call Angel and the teams hypocrisy. I got told to kill myself, that my problems arent real - oh but Angels apparently is! Which... They *are* but AD isnt real so technically only onlookers will suffer and not a drawing  - and they just excused their toxic behaviours. These people are like “aww poor angie babey!” yet fuckin INSULT sex workers. All this red in Hazbin yet it feels everyone and they mama colour blind. The issues are getting worse and fans are outright becoming EVIL, VILE, Vindictive little bullies - from kids to adults. You SHOULD be ashamed of yourself if you conduct yourself in such a manner. And you need to readjust your attitudes and behaviours because the only fuckers getting hurt are actual fucking victims. Ever been violated and been gaslit so much you STILL fucking question it’s reality? So you drown that shit out yet somehow it’s effects still hit you? Fetishise it. Make it your uwu gae couple goals, you’re no better than people believing Harley and the Joker werent toxic af. If this shit happened to you, most of you would actually SEE where we’re all coming from. Also, stop making gay a fetish - you’re like those creepy old men in the alley heckling lesbians to make out so they can wank off. Gays, no ALL the LGBT+ are fucking people too. So dont give me that bullshit then start turning everything just gay or just straight to mentally wank off to. It’s degrading and dehumanising. And yes, fiction does effect reality. You crush on a fictional character? Mourn one? Support one? Hell, fuckin jerk off to one - that’s affecting reality. Remember how in fiction all blacks were treated as villians? Look how theyre treated IRL. JAWS, great classic unfortunately their was a spike in shark killings over a fucking movie - the shark in the movie wasnt even real for the most part because they dont behave like that! (Also the animatronic was so shit they genuinely had so many issues - I think they even took to naming each one! Some fun trivia there!). Tiger sharks are more nasty than great whites as tiger sharks will hunt and eat a human. Great whites prefer seals and dislike human flesh, they just mistake us for seals. Hell, theres the toothless basking shark - theyre often SWAM WITH by divers for being so friendly. Yet Jaws made people think all sharks are bloodlusting over humans. Slenderman was created for a fucking contest and that influenced a stabbing (NOT Victor’s fault). Watch a horror movie that isnt based on a real life event and tell me that at least ONE has left you peaking over your shoulder. Stella may be a bitch - we dont know for certain - but try getting cheated on. Y’know what? Try growing up in such a broken home like Octavia. Yeah reaaaaaal fucking cute now, huh? Funny how as well y’all petition for male victims to be taken seriously then laugh when fictional males experience this abuse, further adding to stigma. You can be hit on by the hottest mf on the planet but if you arent interested, that should be respected! Also we’ve all been inspired by at least one fictional character so yeah. Yknow, since I was little Ive been fighting for sex worker and homeless rights. But HH/HB treatment of both leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I’ll still fully support sex workers and the homeless, but that’s the fucking effect this show is having. Bearing in mind I wont ever share everything Ive been through - and I shouldnt fucking have to in order to be believed and validated (obvs proof is required in a legal case but that’s a whole other topic). Why should I share MY fucking pain especially when you fuckers have belittled and triggered it more so? We have our rights to our secrets but fuck ME you lot NEED to start acting appropriately and like decent fucking humans. ‘iTs HeLl’ yeah and welcome to Earth- the team and yourselves live HERE. You obide by THESE rules. And as someone with beliefs (and a LOT of ancient fucking texts and studies on this shit) their Hell isnt even a proper Hell! It’s closer to purgatory and even then it’s not. Regardless, it’s a poorly built world with the lore consistently changing per episode and tweet, with many plot holes, and is apparently easy to get into - even via accidentally watching porn according to a stream. If youre gonna parade youre a fucking expert and research into demonology and use real believed figures, at least get THAT right. In fact, Lucifer and Lilith (and Stolas tbf) are ESPECIALLY risky as theyre a lot more complex than most easy access texts will tell you. Likewise, Stolas’s first introduction and main focus is sex. He’s one of the FEW Goetia demons that dont have some involvement in relationship issues at ALL. He’s known for astrology, crystals and herbs but hes also known to aid MONEY troubles (it’s lesser known but it’s true! HB Stolas is an insult to the Prince). Turning Vodou into something evil is vile considering it’s powerful and liberated slaves. Pentagrams are nothing to do with Satan, they’re magic based sigils. Upside down cross is the symbol of a SAINT. It’s just some edgy attempt to trick people into believing they know more than they do. Also you should NEVER dabble and doodle sigils without knowing the meanings or respecting what they behold. Vox and Val, real fuckin cute way to make them look like a stupid fucking highschool drama instead of a fucking SEX TRAFFICKER (note: real pimps often target YOUNG folks too - aka minors - and groom them into sex work. Theres different types of pimp. Viv has shown barely any understanding of ‘the game’ and its a fucking insult to injury. Yes we KNOW what a fucking pimp and prozzie are! We dont need to see it. We need REAL AWARENESS.) and a fucking scheming bastard of a CEO salesman botman. And yet even THEN lets go a step further and make some yandere wuv on boyfweind aboose! Fuck off- Now I love a good anime but these tropes are getting fucking dangerous now. And unrealistic to real love and relationships. Kids nowadays know fuck all on a healthy relationship (neither did the fuckin 50s tbf) and Im seeing more romaticism and glorifying abusive situations. Like the show ‘You’. Ok, there’s a fuckin bloke online who slaughtered innocents and kidnapped yet people commented how cute he is on his IG and that they want to be kidnapped or killed by him next. Dont believe me? Look up Peter Manfredonia Connecticut and the comments people left him and then tell me why shit like whats being presented in HH/HB ISNT fucking concerning - because it is. For a series about redemption, it’s brilliant at the opposite (Quote from the creator herself, Viv has posted that it’s influencing her bad choices. Even as a joke, proof’s in the pudding). And the overall focus on sex in the way Viv does is so immature and really creepy, and this is from an ADULTS perspective. From one adult to another, Im concerned as to why any of them think this is a normal fixation. Then again they’ve hired quite a large amount of dodgy folks and even a child. Most of this shit gets avoided with a basic background check like most companies run. I DO like Hazbin. Or the premise. I love some of the cast and spite the others. In Helluva, I just like a tiny portion of the cast. And I critique it so harshly because Viv DOES need a wakeup slap, grounding to reality, people who arent going to big her up or kiss her arse for once and shape her up to be the best she can be. The actually reach and even surpass her potential. And to reach where you need to be, there’s a lot of harsh lessons youll face. That’s life. Shes chosen one of the most HEARTLESS industries and if she blocks out critique as ‘hate’ then she’s not strong enough and wont last. It’s just another unprepped YanDev again (except I dont believe Viv to be a nonce. Even with her dodgy past and dodgy present, I think her perspective on sex and relationship with sexuality is FAR from healthy BUT I dont believe she’s a pedophile. Ive bled my fair share and so far, I just think her sex perspective isnt healthy or mature for her age. But there’s little to nothing to suggest actual noncery - dont worry about accusations there. But YanDev is totally a dirty predator. Just clearing that up). Viv NEEDS some harshness and stability if she wants to do things right. And it’ll make her fucking cry but if she loves these projects as much as she claims to, then you’ll sacrifice blood, sweat and tears for that shit. Even the strongest points are mediocre at best when properly observed. She CAN do more, but she’ll have to face the harsh music. Viv wont see this, but if she does, I dont care if it upsets her. Why? Because this is that much of an issue - something she’s cultivated - that she needs to take action and not ignore it or be secretive about it. She needs to grow up and get tougher skin. Im not saying this to cause her pain. In fact, I wouldnt waste my fucking limited time if I DIDNT care. Trust me, I have duties to be met at a certain quota every single day. I say this shit only because I give a shit and care. If we met, she’d fucking hate me. But people like me are good for shaping people up to their potential. And we arent always this ‘tough love’ either. But when someone needs that level of harshness to help themselves, we’re not afraid to lose people or cause upset if the results end up being the best for them. If she ever saw this, she needs to re fucking evaluate her message, her story, and those she’s choosing to welcome into her circle. And all Im seeing is one rookie mistake after the other. Her paid patreon discord. Just like the messages Honest has posted on her side of being harassed (not in Vivs fyi), Ive experienced shit and bullying and even stay silent on their for being attacked for a group I fuckin paid to be in and yet I feel isolated. It’s all arsekissing and ‘thank you viv’ (thats an actual channel-) and it feels like a place of borderline worship and people trying to appease her 24/7 whilst kicking others with different opinions down. There’s so many I love but I aint kissin yer fuckin arse. Ask the closest friend I have - we’re fucking raw and wont just side with each other just because. We’ll call each other out if we think they’ve fucked up and then help each other build themselves up better. Because real fuckin people who actually care wont just want to be adored by you. They’ll care enough to point out your bullshit and help you, even if they upset you at the time. They’re real and upfront with you. People like us arent always the easiest to be close to either because we arent afraid of upsetting someone if it’s in their best interest and to help them. Likewise, we dont go out looking for fights either. Most times, we’re fuckin soft bastards- All this shit listed is the fuckin surface level of the real life hell of this fandom. And unsurprisingly, those who experience little to no toxicity have always been higher on that popularity ‘food chain’ - enough admirers and shared opinions that people wanna arse kiss regardless of their OWN feelings as well as neutral perspectives. I’d say you’re the lucky fans, but you’re not. You’re sheltered, and that isnt always the best way to be sadly. As for the fans. If Ive upset you. Well... I dont care. Because many of you have actively sought me out and weaponised my traumas against me. You never cared about my feelings then. Why should I care about yours? Im not doing this out of malice. Im fed up of humans behaving so pathetically yet claiming to be high and mighty. Most of you have been arseholes to those in and out of the community. The victims and non-victims alike. Hardly any of you considered once my real suffering. You put a drawing over a life. Many lives. You had the audacity to tell me Im full of shit. Some even using my real traumas to make a mockery of me and those Im around with a very similar history. Some with traumatic histories that differ from my own. You hardly ever considered the real lives of those effected. So no, Im not sorry for having the fucking balls to this day to still stand up for our rights and give us a voice that’s long been stolen. Im not sorry for being a fucking victim. Im not sorry for saying what desperately NEEDS voicing. And Im not sorry for not conforming to you or any fandom just to belong. We deserve better than to constantly be your fuckin arse monkeys (well... the trope is butt monkey but yknow-) and to be mistreated, misrepresented and harmed by you. You’re no different to the school bullies who give speeches on anti-bullying day. And I hope every single one of you starts looking into yourselves and improving. PS: Depending on the texts you read, Lucifer is said to have been redeemed or to be redeemed. Fun fact to haunt yalls with~ “

[ecotone99]

[MF]It's all fun and games

The thing I hate worst about hunting demons is the hours. It sure as hell ain’t nine to five. I’m not saying it’s always at midnight, but it is very rarely earlier. Definitely nothing good happens after midnight.

I've been waiting on this one for a few days. The Strauss family had given me the key to their house and rushed out in obvious relief on Tuesday. As I had requested, they had tidied up but not moved too many things. I had come in with my gear and set up in the garage. A military style cot, dried food, two changes of clothes, some basic toiletries, and my box.

Yeah my box.

It’s important.

Years ago, I carved my box from an oak beam salvaged from a burnt down church. I had salvaged several things from that old place after it burned. I had a lot more of the wood, of course. The firemen had let me in as soon as they had completely extinguished the flames. Some of the metal objects had been quite warm but I figured I owed the congregation my best efforts. They deserved it. I was still pawing through the wreckage when about fifty parishioners showed up with tools and trucks. The had food and drinks with them. Two of the men had gently but firmly removed me from the wreckage and sat me down on a tailgate with a cup of coffee and the best damn egg sandwich I had ever eaten.

That was the night my eyes had been opened and my calling made perfectly clear. The night a demon burned down my fucking church. Right before I killed the little hellspawn.

These days I don’t get surprised. Some of the tactics vary with the demons but mine was pretty set in stone. As one of my childhood heroes, Bruce Lee puts it, “I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.” My kick is my box.

I realize it seems a little weird as a weapon. It’s not so much the weapon exactly as a trap and a coffin. The box is very important and the nature of its making is important and hugely complicated. But in the end it makes the work so much easier. You can do this job without one, I had killed my first demon without one, but the box makes it possible to do so without burning down the structure you currently occupy. Bonus.

I won’t bore you with all the Symbols carved into the box. They are important certainly but the importance is directly related to me. If you made a box it would be very similar to mine in many ways. I could use yours and you could use mine. Assuming, of course that you are also a thaumaturge blessed by heaven. A thaumaturge is what they used to call a wonder worker or miracle worker.

I’m not making this shit up. Lots of Catholic saints, godmen in India and various other chosen people around the globe have done this throughout history. I can do it but I have no freaking idea how it works. I am satisfied knowing that it does, and I can help people with it.

Now sitting in the Strauss’ garage over the past few days I have really caught up on my reading. Mostly on my phone but also on my tablet, I devour series and single novels voraciously. If I could just make a living doing this I would be set. I eat a healthy, if a Spartan diet. I have all day to read, exercise and nap. Most nights are quiet and when they aren’t I have the grim satisfaction of knocking another invader off the wall between us and hell.

Have you ever looked at your watch, then someone asks you what time it is and you have to look again to answer them? That is the feeling I get when some demon shenanigans are about to begin. Like I did something stupid and I will likely do it again. I guess because the evil of the demon has a range and the perimeter feels more like exposed stupidity than actual evil. Chagrin maybe, I don’t know.

I set down my tablet when I get that feeling. I flex my feet in my boots to make sure the are tightly fastened. Standing slowly, I check the function of my joints and do a quick little stretch. I don’t want to pull a muscle for crying out loud. Some of these whoresons can get kind of rough. I snagg the box from where it lays on my pack. Finally, I roll my neck out one more time and walk to the door into the house and open it.

As I step through I catch a whiff. Butt funk and honey, Eu d’ Demon, my least favorite smell. The Strausses had told me that the demon seemed to begin in the kitchen and then move through the living room on its way upstairs to the kids rooms. I quickly decide to meet it in the living room instead of the kitchen. Too much sharp shit and glass in there.

Moving quickly I set the box down on the spot I picked out when I first arrived. The lid opens silently and I get a whiff of the oil that I rub into the wood after each use. It’s a pleasant and wholesome smell that covers up the demon stink very well.

I move silently and crouch behind the couch. I control my breathing and begin focusing on one of the small thaumaturgical miracles I can do. It essentially freezes any hellspawn in place for a few vital moments. I’m not one hundred percent sure why this is but it has something to do with how our brain functions versus a demons. Our amygdala is the part of the brain that processes our emotional reactions. Our amygdala loves a surprise. We like scary movies, surprise birthday parties and unexpected events. Even those people who say they hate them enjoy them. Well at least their amygdala has a positive reaction, even if the secondary reactions are not good.

I can sense the demon enter the room. The malevolence is palpable. An oppressive wrongness that kicks the senses into fight or flight. It’s time to make my move. My thaumaturgy is ready and I jump up from behind the couch and scream,

“Peek-a-boo!”

The reaction is instantaneous. The ugly blue/green thing with a clown’s face goes rigid, stiff as a board. I dash in and grab it with both hands and throw it as hard as I can towards the box. I hear the satisfying clunk of it closing, signifying the thaumaturge has taken affect.

I have never had the phobia but I do understand why people fear clowns. Something that closely resembles a human face but is slightly wrong in its features and movement makes us horrified. Deep down we know that the smile is wrong and hiding something. Every demon I have ever killed had a clown’s face. Horrifying.

I'm already fixing in my mind the next piece of thaumaturgy and I spin around putting my back to the demon and placing my hands over my eyes. I began to count aloud.

“1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, 4 Mississippi, …”

When I get to ten I spin around and speak to the closed box.

“Ready or not, here I come.”

The box sits there, the lid is closed. I walk to the box and lift it onto the coffee table. I sit down on the couch and stare at the box for a moment and then reach out with my fist. I tap on the lid, the old rhythm. Tap tap tatap tap, Shave and a Haircut...a short silence. Then from inside the box comes the answering taps. Tap tap, Two bits. Got the bastard.

Now comes the coup de grace. I focus nearly all my attention on my left hand. I make it a weapon of the light and good in this world. I focus the wrath of God in my hand so that it begins to glow. I hold that power ready.

My right hand reaches for the little handle on the side of my box. It is the crank for a music box. As I begin to turn, the tinny sound of the music box floats in the room. I mouth the words to the song as I slowly crank the handle:

“Round and round the mulberry bush...The monkey chased the weasel..”

I think of all the little children in the world who go to sleep at night with a tiny touch of fear. They don’t know if they are the monkey or the weasel. Do they pursue their goals like their monkey. Scampering and trying to catch the things and people in their life that make them happy. Or do they scamper along in terror and panic? Stressed by the world and it’s pressure and always fearful of failure.

“The monkey thought twas all in fun..”

I know. I know they are both. I can’t save them from their own thoughts and choices, but I can give them one less thing to fear.

“Pop!...”

The lid pops open and the demon springs up. It is hideous and ridiculous all at the same time. It slobbers and snots through its horrid clown face. It’s blue hair bounced in ridiculous shoots at the sides of its head. The hands, in fat white gloves, reached toward me.

I reach out my left hand and touch the sickly soft fabric of its costume.

“You’re it, motherfucker.” I say in a low growl.

With the combination of the touch and those magic words, the clown screams. It lays its head back and howls. The hands come up straight in the sky and the entire clown body slumps all at once back into the box. One more scream comes from the box but it trails off. Like the old Roadrunner cartoons when something fell off a cliff. The scream fades and dies. I look in the box just to be sure. It smells like unwashed ass and honey but otherwise it is empty.

My right hand is still on the crank handle, I play the last notes.

“...goes the weasel.”

More stories, and some good reading and podcasts at https://www.ityatale.com/stories

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