#like whatever. hes not real but hes still infinitely important and real in a way that affects me

[bingobongobonko]

as much as its funny hahahah im ngl im really upset that the only amount of substantial connection i feel sometimes is my own characters. like its stupid but literally isolated in my own head. hassan probably the closest thing i got to relating to somebody on a substantial level and i made him that way. lol. fuck yk. its like. Wow hassan you completely understand what im feeling and youre oddly reminiscent of my own behaviors and you share the exact same issues and everything that hurts you hurts me too and it hurts in the same way. youre the closest ive ever felt to someone. Oh wait ur not fucking real. im gonna throw up

[transgenderer]

So there's an octavia butler short story, the book of Martha, where God gives an author (closely patterned on butler herself, but possibly intentionally less creative) infinite(?) power to remake the world, to fix humanity and/or its problems before we destroy ourselves. After considering a variety of options (it's possible she's only allowed to modify human nature? But the story never stares that. Maybe she's just not good at considering all her options) she just gives everyone extremely pleasurable dreams. So they're less ambitious I guess. And in general have nicer lives

Anyway this story has stuck with me in two ways. The first: so, assume you're not just gonna like. Give humanity infinite resources or whatever. How do you make a utopia? Well to me the answer seems obvious, based on my experience of my own psyche. The human mind needs more affection. It's too easy for annoyance or some petty issue to overwhelm affection. And then we are cruel and selfish and all this stuff. Like. Idk, I feel like I've experienced moments of clear-eyed saintlihood. My brain produces that...outlook/emotion/whatever. But it won't stick there, of course. But it feels like it wouldn't be too far a jump to just get the human brain to stick there more easily. Still let us access other states, for variety. Give us some sense of others freedom or whatver, so our care for each other doesn't make us all busy bodies. But like. It would only take the tugging of a few chemical strings to fix human nature. A little less rage, a little more philia.

This is of course an important piece of evidence that if there is a god he doesn't love us. He could have made us full of lovingkindness. He could have made us not want to hurt and humiliate each other. But he didn't. Because all that nastiness helps us succeed in the social games that increase our mating frequency, or selectiveness, or whatever, presumably, and so selective descent with modification doomed us all forever. Or, God is real but cares about something else. Maybe beauty. Maybe he feels the glory of war is worth it.

But the second thing, is noticing which parts of our world feel like a Martha has already been there. I was looking at the sky on the train home today (hmabhrg! There was a William Blake exhibition), admiring it, and I was struck again by how...excessive, superfluous, overflowing, decadent, additional it is. The sky could just be a simple blue, fading evenly to black. Clouds could always be blobby and indistinct. We could all be congenital shortsighted, so they were always blurry. But instead they're just this part of the world, detached from all the specifics of earthly life, that is achingly beautiful, most nights! Sunsets are so beautiful it's cliche, it's boring! That feels like a gift from a Martha. Someone a bit uncreative trying to fix the world in a way that doesn't shake it up too much

[explosiontooth]

Ive held the headcannon/theory of the metalocalypse being a cycle close to my heart for a while, so I wanted to make a post of evidence of why this may be the case. Its a bit long, so here it is under a read more

For a recap, this hc states that the Metalocalypse has happened before, and it will happen again in the future. The prophecy was less of a “real” prophecy and more of a historical account of what happened and what will happen again.

To get the obvious out of the way, the Death Clock is an actual object that counts down to the metalocalypse. It’s in the very nature of clocks to repeat over and over again.

Why would they make it circle shaped if it was just a one time event lol

Throughout the series we also see various historical depictions of dethklok, in wildly different times and places

There’s ancient Sumerian carvings, Yaneemango sculptures from an unknown time period, and paintings from the medieval period. And if you want to count them, there’s their ancient animal forms, which might just be a manifestation of their spirits rather than actual previous lives that they lived. But its still worth bringing up.

On to my second point:

In AOTD, we see a scene of the tribunal observing a demon fall through the doomstar’s portal and die. Vater Oorlag calls it “sister of the Krakish”

Which probably means that this demon is related to our good pal Musta-Krakish, and that Musta-Krakish is from whatever underworld that the Doomstar leads to.

However, in Dethtroll, they dont summon him from a portal. He’s already there in the lake, just asleep. Which means he likely came through the doomstar in a previous cycle. If only there were evidence this happened.. oh wait there is

Alongside the medieval-style murals, we see this depiction of what are obviously Klokateers battling Musta-krakish. This is inconsistent with Dethtroll, as there are no klokateers in that episode, and the only people who battle the troll are Dethklok. So clearly, this is a different battle in a different time. Which also means that the “Grandpas Guitars” are likely the instruments belonging to Dethklok’s previous incarnation.

Lastly, theres a lot of lyrics in plot-important songs referring to themes of the infinite and living multiple lives. Here’s a few I found

Anyway yea I love reincarnation stories forever ❤��

[chitty-chitty-bang-bang-bang]

Vlad, Viago and Deacon as parents headcanons

Author’s note: I could make a series out of this maybe. Would you guys be interested in that? Let me know.

Update: Here’s the part two, part three and part four.

When Viago found a child, freshly turned into a vampire on the side of the road in the Wellington suburbs, he knew he couldn’t just leave it there. So he did the only natural thing and brought you home.

At first, Vladislav and Deacon protested the idea firmly. A child did not belong in their household. But with enough persuasion from their favourite dandy and your puppy-dog eyes, they unenthusiastically gave in.

In the beginning, all three of them were a bit annoyed by you. As a child, you were very nosy and did a lot of things you shouldn’t, like touching their stuff, accidentally or purposely waking them up too early, making messes and all that jazz.

But with time you learned to play by their rules and they learned to accept your premature nature.

Viago is the mom. Nobody cares for you more than him. He treats you like his own descendant and nurtures you constantly.

He makes sure you act properly with all due respect and manners.

He teaches you human anatomy and even a thing or two about hunting, though in the first few months he would just kill a victim and bring it to you.

He’s the one you come to talk to about your feelings and concerns, because you trust him to actually listen and understand.

You remind him of himself, when he was young. He had long forgotten that feeling.

Sometimes he can be a bit overbearing with his care and attempts at upbringing, but you have a very close and loving relationship.

Vladislav was the second person to slowly warm up to you.

He loved your infinite curiosity for everything he did. You soaked in knowledge like a sponge.

He read you all of his poetry (aside from the ones, which are obviously inappropriate for kids) and told you stories of his life and death.

Vlad insisted on you learning through experience, so he constantly took you out hunting. Though he was still nearby, to make sure you don’t accidentally come across any vampire slayers or get outed.

You usually come to him for advice on important matters and it flatters him way more than he likes to admit.

You made him wonder what it would’ve been like to have children of his own.

Then there was Deacon.

Your relationship was very complicated at first.

To put it simply, he ignored your existence or just dismissed it, because he was mad that the decision to let you stay here was made against his will.

He didn’t want you here.

But that all changed when you started rambling about how much you loved his knitting projects and asked him to teach you.

He liked teaching you. Not just knitting, but teaching you anything new in general.

Whatever you ask he will always answer with a smart look, even if he doesn’t know the actual answer.

He found hanging out with you much more fun, than it seemed before.

He’s like the fun parent. The one who lets you do things Viago and Vladislav would never allow.

Like jumping off some very high surface and turning into a bat seconds before hitting the ground just for the thrill of it or drinking liquor blood from people outside “Boogie Wonderland”.

He still has a bit of a protective streak, so Deacon never got you into actual real danger.

That doesn’t mean he wasn’t later scolded by the other two vampires for even making you think doing this stuff was okay.

He’s also a surprisingly good empath and always senses when you’re upset about something.

I imagine he’d do the same talk about immortality with you, that he did with Nick.

They guided you through that phase of realisation, that you will be a child for the rest of your undead existence. They helped you through your worst. Even if they weren’t really sure how to, just the fact that they tried their best was enough.

This lifestyle can be miserable and very depressing. But not with them.

With them it is never boring or dull. Even the usual routine can be brightened up by vibrant stories of the past, hobbies, that they can engage you in or a nice night out on the town.

With time, you actually start feeling, like you have a family once again.

A sincere and loving family of bloodthirsty old men.

[sapphic-agent]

So I was thinking about that anon ask about Eri and the more I ponder it, the more I kind of vibe with villain(ish)!Eri.

Imagine an Eri who wasn't mistreated by Overhaul. Whose life improved once she was taken in by her grandfather. She gets everything she wants and is spoiled rotten by both her grandfather and Chisaki. Maybe she buys into Overhaul's ideals, it was her quirk that killed her father and made her mother resent her, after all. She's manipulated into helping him instead of being outright forced, rewarded with his affection.

(Chisaki tells her that her grandfather is sick, and she believes him without question)

Then Izuku, Mirio, and the heroes come and ruin it all. She doesn't want their help, but they defeat Overhaul and she's given to UA. And she hates it there. She tries to run away, acts out, and pitches a fit every chance she gets. She warms up to Izuku and Mirio because they take the time to get to know her, value her opinion, and don't try to police her behavior. But she absolutely hates being in Aizawa's custody, especially because he can shut off her quirk. She constantly tests Aizawa's patience.

She wants to go home and be with her "Papa" and "Uncle Kai." But then learns that Chisaki hurt her grandfather because he protested against using her for his experiments. And it changes her entire outlook. How could her beloved uncle hurt her grandfather? Kai would never hurt family, he always said that!

Now Eri isn't just angry, she's devastated. She's sad and confused and in pain in a way she doesn't understand. She becomes so subdued that UA (in their infinite wisdom) stop watching her as closely. Big mistake. She runs off, and this time no one's there to stop her.

Only to get picked up by the MLA. They've been watching her since she was taken in by the Yakuza, but they aren't exactly sure what her quirk is. All they know is that it's powerful and want to use it to their advantage. So they try to interrogate her to no avail (Eri, as the granddaughter of a Yakuza boss, has seen real interrogations and is thoroughly unimpressed). They try to coerce her into joining them willingly, which triggers a mental breakdown because it's so similar to how Kai convinced her to help him.

Everyone only wants her for her power. Everyone except-

Izuku and Mirio (without a quirk like a boss) rescue her and it's here that they earn her admiration and adoration. Because she treated them horribly, but they still saved her. They still cared for her. Not for her power, but because she was important to them.

I like Eri in canon fine, but I won't refute that she's one-dimensional. I think something like this would have been really interesting. It not only makes her more layered as a character, it also drives home that every kid is worth saving, not only the sweet, innocent victims. Very good chance for parallels with the LOV.

(But I'm actually glad Horikoshi didn't do this. Girls in anime with complexity aren't treated well, just look at Gabi. Eri would have gotten a lot of hate for being "annoying" or whatever)

I'm thinking of incorporating it into the rewrite somehow.

[gerec]

SPACE AUS - PART 2

The Edge of What Doesn’t End by populuxe

When a mysterious object appears on the moon, Moira MacTaggert calls in two experts with very specific mutations to investigate.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, after years of breaking up and getting back together again, those two experts have finally broken up for good—and they’re the last people in the world who should be stuck together on a spaceship.

burn the land and boil the sea by kaydeefalls (series)

In which the Unification War begins, Erik leads the Browncoats' mutant faction, and Charles searches for something worth fighting for. (Fusion with the Firefly 'verse)

Remind me what you're looking for by pearl_o

"There's a dozen ships here you could get transport on," Erik points out.

"I'm asking you," Charles says.

A Beginner's Guide to Star-Forming Event Horizons by midrashic

Charles Xavier is not thrilled to be on the USSAS Magneto, with its missions to the back-end of nowhere and its captain who is famous for having violated the Prime Directive. But appearances can be deceiving.

And we pulled each other like gravity by hllfire

Erik accompanies Charles, Crown Prince of the Xavier Empire, to his first diplomatic meeting on the planet Themis, where he finds out something about the Prince and they end up talking about the past and how their paths had crossed before.

The Sleeping Beauty in the Ivory Tower (- or Erik Lehnsherr is a hopeless romantic) by ximeria

There is a tale, out among the stars, of a sleeping beauty in an ivory tower.

Infinite Distance by lachatblanche

When they encounter an unfamiliar and seemingly-abandoned ship in the middle of nowhere in space, Captain Charles Xavier of the spaceship Graymalkin heads out to investigate.

Infinite Distance (Finite Time Remix) by SlightWeasel

A month ago, far-flung Genosha went dark on every communications channel.

Whatever happened there, it has little enough relevance for young Charles Xavier, resident of Graymalkin-- until the day he receives a distress call from Erik Lehnsherr, Genosha's only surviving citizen...

Pit stop by diner_drama

Charles was pretty happy with his lot, on the whole. As chief engineer, he spent the majority of his time teaching hot-shot new mechanics and aspiring ship-builders. He could confidently say that he had created an excellent work environment that really allowed these young workers to flourish and grow. The only real challenges, apart from the occasional Very Large Fire (bad) and having to fill in his yearly expense reports (catastrophic), were arrogant pilots who believed that the importance of their ship gave them carte blanche to treat the repair crew like garbage.

Case in point, Erik Fucking Lehnsherr.

Yes, he was the best racing pilot in the galaxy. Yes, he had designed his ship personally and it was fundamentally perfect in every important way. Yes, his steely blue eyes made Charles feel light-headed whenever they came up on his viewscreen.

He was still an asshole.

Neither Rhyme Nor Reason by unveiled

Charles liked to tell people that the first time they met, Serik punched a kitten. (Or, the one where Erik is an angry Vulcan, Charles is still a telepath, and grief still shapes their lives.)

A Vision of Peace by Gerec

They call his people 'monsters' and say that a telepath is incapable of something as universal as falling in love.

But they're wrong about Charles Xavier, heir to the throne of Cerellia; for everything he does in life, he does for love.

It's Magic! (A Gift Remix) by Gerec 

The Oracle agrees to help Erik locate Shaw, if Erik agrees to return to him after the mission.

And now that the deed is done, it's time to keep his promise.

Flirting with Death (Eternal Remix) by Gerec 

Erik Lehnsherr is the latest in a long line of vampire hunters, their legacy going back a thousand years to the days before space travel and the existence of life beyond Earth. He's tracking one of the most dangerous blood-drinkers they've ever known, and he's determined to save the man she's targeted as her next victim.

Now if he could only convince Xavier that his life is in very real danger...

SPACE AUS - PART 1

[sunandflame]

Shards of Glass, Chapter 4

Summary: Kyojuro Rengoku, History Teacher on the Kimetsu Academy, is constantly having strange dreams about a Slayer who looks exactly like him. He thinks nothing of it until he recognizes a very specific person from these dreams and feels a very unique connection to her.

Pairing: History Teacher Kyojuro x Teacher Fem!Reader

Trope: Reincarnation / Sequel to Flame and Water (can be stand-alone)

Word Count: 1664

Warning: slightly suggestive

Pinterest Board of Shards of Glass

Crossposted on AO3

Masterlist of Shards of Glass

He fished out the flower that was floating at the edge of the pond and placed it in her hair. "You are as beautiful and pure as this water lily..." His lips were close to her ears when he whispered his words, kissing her ear that brought up a soft giggle from her. She turned to him and his heart clenched at the beautiful sight of her. God, he loved her so much…

This time the awakening was gentler, the image before his eyes clearer. The beauty of Y/N was burned into his mind and he couldn't calm the pounding of his heart the more he thought about her. He was confused and didn't know what these dreams were trying to tell him. In the first week she started as an English teacher, all he saw in his dreams was her terrified face, which gave him no peace at night. He could not bear the thought that he might have hurt her. Seeing it over and over again made him avoid sleeping, letting him rely on coffee, which didn't really help. 

It also didn't help that he barely saw her. He wanted to meet the woman who haunted his dreams or memories or whatever it was. The guilty conscience that he hadn't done it on the first day still plagued him, but yesterday everything had changed.

After the neverending week he had finally spoken to her and it went better than he thought it would. It was surprising how easy it was to talk to her and he liked her more than a normal amount. The connection he felt with her had been driving him crazy the whole time and the previous dream explained a lot too. “We were lovers…” He whispered to himself. He held his blushing face in his hands. The feeling of butterflies raging in his stomach from his dream were still very present. He wasn't sure if the feelings he felt were his own or those of his inherited memory. Were they even inherited memories? If so, then he was missing some big important parts of this story because nothing he saw actually made sense.

He sighed and was already on his way to the kitchen to get some breakfast since he was hungry, but that didn’t stop his thoughts. Was this perhaps a case of reincarnation? When he was writing his thesis, back in his student era, there was one time he had come across this topic but hadn’t paid much attention to it since it was not part of the work. Maybe he should have done that. He sighed. He would have to investigate the matter more thoroughly. There should be records of his ancestors at his parents’ place. Next time he visited, he would take a look at the Rengoku archives.

~ ~ ~

The blonde man tried to focus but had trouble because his eyes kept wandering over to Y/N. It didn't make it any easier that she was sitting right across from him and was therefore directly in his field of vision. Everything she did seemed incredibly familiar. The way she frowned slightly in concentration, or the way she pushed her hair behind her ear even though there wasn't a loose strand hanging. Things he had not yet seen in his dreams, but still seemed infinitely familiar to him. He tried hard to not let the feelings he had in his dreams take over in his real life. He didn't want to be influenced by something that happened in the past or in a dream, but how would that work? It was simply impossible not to surrender to her shy yet charming nature. Or the way she treated everyone around her with such kindness. Kyojuro had to admit to himself that he had fallen head over heels for the English teacher.

Suddenly a ball of paper hit him in the head and made him snap out of his thoughts. He looked for the one who was responsible for it and found him. Confused, over Shinazugawa's angry face he tried to interpret why he was angry again. He couldn't find an explanation and simply dismissed it. He was not looking at him anymore anyway. Kyojuro’s gaze moved back up to Y/N and then to Kocho who was sitting right next to her and then across to the math teacher who also seemed to be constantly staring in the same direction. Wait- Was he staring at Y/N too? Hot jealousy burned within him that he had never felt before in his life. An unexpected aggressiveness spread through his thoughts and he imagined himself hitting Shinazugawa. He was shocked immediately after the moment he realized what he was actually thinking. What was wrong with him?! Nothing like this had ever happened to him before, since he was not the jealous type. He had had relationships in the past, but he had never felt this way before.

He took a deep breath to calm himself down and stared at his papers so as not to let the traitorous feelings out.

"Finally done..." Y/N  had just finished checking the exams of the students and stretched her arms. A relieved sigh escaped her, she finally had the whole weekend for herself and she was so looking forward to her bathtub where she would put on a clay mask, laze around and actually read a book and not the illegible notes of her students. She was excited to treat herself like this and cuddle afterwards with her cat Shimizu.

But she couldn't fully immerse herself in her dreams when suddenly two fuchsia colored eyes appeared in front of her. "Hey, pretty new colleague! We have a monthly drinking party with all the teachers today. You should come with us, since you are one of us now, and this way we can all get to know each other better!" 

She blinked at him several times and was wondering if he just flirted with her but then she remembered how he usually was which relaxed her immediately. Her gaze wandered around to see if the others were also so enthusiastic about this idea. Obanai and Sanemi were caught up in a conversation. 

Kanae gave her a friendly smile and nodded encouragingly. "Y/N, you should come. Our drinking parties are always very fun and that way we can all be friends." Friends... Yes, that was something she definitely needed.

 "Yes, Y/N, come with us! The more the merrier!" Kyojuro's loud exclamation had thrown her off track and she looked back and forth between them before nodding finally in agreement.

~ ~ ~

It didn't take long for the orders to be placed. Y/N sat a little shyly between the big, but kindhearted Gyomei, and Giyuu. She knew that Giyuu wasn't the talkative type and you were surprised that he even had come along with them. But what Giyuu lacked in communication, Tengen provided in an amazing way. He talked about a lot of things and introduced all his colleagues to her again. They also seemed a little more relaxed now when they weren't fenced in by the school walls. The food came and everyone started to grab it when she suddenly noticed something. She looked at the blonde history teacher who was happily eating one plate after another. He seemed to have a religious experience with his soup filled with sweet potato, saying umai to himself as he sipped it.

Y/N was fascinated by it and forgot to touch her own plate while she watched him. He didn't let his mood be spoiled when some of his colleagues rolled their eyes in a bit of annoyance. No, he continued to eat and looked so happy as he mumbled with his mouth full how tasty it was. Y/N could see how some of the colleagues were face palming or smiling in a slight embarrassment. But her? She was so charmed by his cute behavior that she could do nothing other than testing her head on her hands and watched the whole situation with a delighted smile. 

After dinner the sake was brought and she had to politely decline because she had come by car and driving drunk was out of the question for her. She noticed that Kyojuro wasn't drinking either.

“But how am I supposed to ask you embarrassing secrets when you don’t drink at all?” Tengen looked at her reproachfully, but she just laughed and poured him another cup.

She was having way too much fun here at the table and Giyuu next to her also seemed to be having fun as a smile was reflected on his lips. Maybe it was also because of the salmon with daikon he was eating messily, bits of the food stuck to his cheeks. “Well, for every bowl of sake you drink, you can ask me something embarrassing.” He already had several cups and was sure that he can’t drink much more so she should be safe.

“Bad idea. Uzui is able to hold one’s drink.” 

She turned her head to Giyuu who was looking at her and knew that she would lose this competition. She wanted to step back, but the art teacher had already ordered more sake for the table and she knew that embarrassing questions were about to rain down on her. 

She didn’t think Tengen could handle a bowl the size of a regular water glass, nevermind several of them, but he proved her wrong. He drank three whole bowls.

“Are you a virgin?”

“No,” Y/N blushed, choking on a bit of her food while forcing the answer as quick as she could out of her throat.

“Are you a dom, a sub, or a switch?” he asked shamelessly with a grin.

She covered her face, giving Tengen the opportunity to wink at Kyojuro. “I am not gonna answer that!”

“That’s okay, your reaction gave it away. Next question: Do you have a boyfriend?” he smirked mischievously.

“Yes.”

A/N: Oh, what have I done? *laughs maliciously* Also I hope some of you noticed the little reference to Flame and Water I put there. If you did, let me know in the replies ❤️

[tenebrius-excellium]

Guys so I visited a medieval smithy the other day (ca. 1300s) and it reminded me a lot of Gobber's workshop... it was easy to imagine that I had just literally stepped into Berk's smithy with my own two feet... and to be honest, seeing this stuff in real life made the whole deal of Hiccup apprenticing in one of these infinitely funnier and Stoick's decision to put him there weirdly...understandable???

Let me elaborate: So you're in approx. 900 AD, you live on a tiny island under rough conditions, EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE WITHOUT A SINGLE EXCEPTION is a craftsman of some kind who has to work manually, and you've got a noodle of a son.

Also you're the Chief, no less than that. Let me tell you that this makes the whole thing just so much worse.

Looking at all those solid iron tools - mighty bellows operated by a beam larger than me, forging tongs that would have been half of Hiccup's size and exactly as heavy as this shot implies,

...swords with hilts longer than a cucumber and crude, brutal design, plus all the firewood that constantly needed to be chopped and carried around... even if Hiccup had turned out to be completely untalented at smithwork, that would have built him some muscles.

You don't understand. Hiccup having no muscles was a death sentence. The environment that he was surrounded by, which I was reminded of in that irl smithy, could - at that time! - only be overcome by hard manual labor, aided by the most basic mechanics. Even if he had become a breadmaker, that still would've built him some muscles. All the kneading, the weightlifting of flour and wood and water, the carrying, would have done the same job. Forget Snotlout bragging about working out in his parents' basement. EVERYONE on Berk was burly not because 'they were vikings' training for war or whatever for funsies every day, but because it literally was a requirement of everyday life to be able to carry something heavy from A to B, and be it only a single sack of grain.

So it's really funny to me how Stoick intentionally put this skinny rat of a son of his into the most merciless and dangerous job that probably existed on the island, just to put him to some use. Poor Hiccup. He's like a wet kitten under the command of a bloodhound. But at the same time, it makes so much sense?? Stoick didn't just put him into a job to gain some weight, he put him into a job that would teach him all about tools and weapons, how to defend himself and about the irreversible price of violence. I imagine a blacksmith would have to know how to use a sword to know what makes a good one, so Hiccup would've naturally learned swordfighting on the side. It was an important skill not just against dragons. We see the gang fight all kinds of human enemies in later years as well.

So what Stoick was basically doing was to prepare him for life. The need for abs back then is comparable to today's education about taxes and insurances. Hiccup needed some brawns to survive Berkian conditions, and not just for fighting dragons. Even though Hiccup had the brilliance to invent mechanical devices that could make life on the island easier, he didn't have electricity and he couldn't just press a button anytime he wanted the laundry done or needed some newly tanned leather. He had to work with his own two hands anyway. No dragon, once tamed, could assist the villagers in ways that an ox or buffalo hadn't done before. Despite his marvelous innovations, there's no changing that Hiccup would remain a craftsman and a warrior throughout his life.

So now there's the fact that Hiccup was a noodle. Having established that with Berk's living conditions in mind, you would basically have to avoid working any daily task ON PURPOSE to NOT develop muscles from early childhood, there are exactly two interpretations as to how Hiccup remained this scrawny for so long: a) he was disabled in some way that prevented him from doing chores, or b) he was spoiled and lazy beyond common sense.

Stoick spoiling someone is unthinkable, and Hiccup doesn't appear disabled. He could be struggling with anything from a muscle-degenerative disease to a fast metabolism to mental issues. But it's not implied in the movies. So how did Hiccup avoid manual labor And what kind of message did that send to the rest of the villagers???

Look, if they thought that he was lazy, or perhaps not quite right in the head, they were probably absolutely right. It would have been maniacal for the Chief to spoil his son to the point where he couldn't fend for himself and expected Berk to serve him and supply him with food. Stoick wanted his son to be Chief, so he would have to school him in some trade that enabled him for economics and warfare. As neither was the case though, it didn't put Stoick in a great light to have a son as Hiccup. How could this have happened - a noodle on Berk? It would have made both father and son the laughingstock.

The only reason that I can think of is neglect. Stoick may have been so grief-stricken about Valka's death that he went easy on Hiccup for a while, and then, when he got possessed by running dragon nest campaigns, he may have simply forgotten that he still had a child at home. And then, once Hiccup became old enough to get into trouble, Stoick may have remembered him because he got complaints from his villagers, and so he hurriedly stuck him with Gobber. Lol.

So that's how a skinny noodle rat with no survival skills whatsoever ended up in the weapon forge of Berk. Gobber has a point being sarcastic about it: "Oh, perfect. And while I'm busy, Hiccup can cover the stall. Molten steel, razor-sharp blades, lots of time to himself - what could possibly go wrong?"

And wrong it goes. I love it. WHAT WERE THEY EXPECTING?? XD

[emry-stars-art]

okay but what happens after andrew confirms that yes he has indeed been courting neil f o r e v e r? like what is neil's reaction 👁️👁️

@ myself: wow haha this got angsty

I know I’m in a fluffy mood but I needed to sit down and really think about this (mind maps and random thought association and all) and it is not great at first! Neil’s immediate reaction, I mean 😭

First, here’s Andrew’s side of the thing for your reading pleasure

And I don’t know how to write Abram’s pov in scene form because it’s so like. Heartbreaking insane in my head. Yes, first there’s 100% this thought process (that’s supposed to be slightly comical but became not that, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean for this to happen) thank you @jtl-fics for the comments I’ve screenshotted from this post:

Second: he begins to feel incredibly guilty that he’s taking this from someone that’s infinitely much more deserving, whoever that is, as long as it’s not him. He was ready for Andrew to find someone he actually deserves. Now he feels like he’s ‘tricked’ Andrew into developing feelings for him, like Abram is a persona that isn’t real enough for Andrew to fall for but he’s tricked him anyway.

Third: Abram is an extension of Andrew’s resources. He’s still an attack dog but one that’s been re-homed, allowed to be much less violent and treated with respect and care that he can accept even if it doesn’t always feel deserved. Abram keeps a dagger at his hip to protect himself, Andrew keeps Abram. When Andrew asks “not what,” it’s something like I’m not that, I’m not an option, I am not even close enough to touch. There is no Abram, there is nothing here for you to love. You can’t. But even if there isn’t, Abram doesn’t need to be a person in that way for Andrew to handle him, use him, however he wants to.

That’s when Abram calms down, I think. That’s something he knows. He’s repressed his own feelings for Andrew so deep that he’d take it, too, he really would let Andrew use him if he wanted to. And it would be the best thing that ever happened to him. He thinks if Andrew is so certain he wants Abram this way, he can be perfect. Abram can be perfect for him, he’s determined to be.

(But that’s a thought process that comes on so quickly and so fully that Abram’s brain actually does let go of his personhood again. This time, though, with no one telling him to attack, he tries instead to be whatever he thinks Andrew wants. So - compliant and receptive.

This is not what Andrew wants.)

But after Abram takes his time away, talking to both Allison and Katelyn about it (they’re both really helpful in their own distinct ways) he understands that Andrew really meant it - he wants Abram as a person that he’s able to have, he wants Abram’s personality and his words and the parts of him he can’t control. Maybe Abram doesn’t even fully realize the scope of his own feelings before accepting the courtship, this time with a clear head and almost shaking with nerves but with a different kind of certainty that Andrew actually does accept. It takes a long time and a lot of assurance but Andrew is patient, until Abram will return gifts and gestures of affection. It actually does so so much to help Abram reclaim his humanity, seeing newly familiar behaviors directed at him with real intention.

Thank you for the ask, this was a point I felt was important to figure out for a while and this prompted me to get around to it! Probably not what you imagined but i uhhh. Sorry 🤧

(Curious? Find a small masterpost of this royal au here 💕)

[disruptivevoib]

I want to talk about the mirror.

So this is about Twine and all the mirror stuff

That being said this involves some.. intense? things. I will explain them as lightly as possible, but a CW: Suicidal Ideation is definitely something that goes in here.

Twine and the mirror kick back actually way to the beginning of the chatroom. Its very interesting how long Twine was gone, which was about 2 months?

But he left initially after a culmination of frustrations and a lot of projection from himself onto Coda (VoR) Soul. I can't go into every intimate detail as to what led up to Twine's mental break, but Coil, failure, realizing how fucked up he'd been towards Yarn, anger ( a lot of that ), and just. Yeah. Coda.

Silence {Ouroboros Soul} (@rosy-fox-art) eventually told Twine to take a break and consult with or be there for his sides. Which is incredibly hypocritical but that is unimportant. Twine in his infinite frustration and also a longing to.. just be better for Mind and Heart fucked off and made his own room, of which he did not previously have.

This room had a computer and a mirror.

An important side note is that the Sun Down thirds can summon things specific to themselves and have properties projected onto them. Think artifacts from TMA if you must, but usually, that projection comes from a mentally ill place.

This being said, the mirror is exactly that. And at the time, Twine was incredibly self-dissecting. I think of Soul as Self-awareness, which can lead to over-analyzation of your wrongdoings and past mistakes and even possible future ones.

The mirror only ever projects back what it is given, however much you give into whatever you see. Twine saw a host of things over that long period of time standing and staring. Because yes, for two months, he stood and he stared and he just sort of tore himself to shreds.

A lot of it comes down to Twine seeing his past self, his Whole, and a couple over visions regarding the ideation of a rope. If you will. As unhealthy and self-destructive as this was, to some degree, a part of Twine was trapped in that mirror, thus he couldn't leave. And it would have changed him, though not for any kind of the better.

He left once, initially, when Ozzy (Voice of Reason Heart) (@agent-8449) showed up. They had their beef. Which I won't get into, it was not pretty. Twine is an asshole, Ozzy is also an asshole. However, he wound up leaving again to return when Yarn left to the Voice of Reason Psyche in a mixed attempt to help Tinker and keep Ozzy from being sent back.

Coil and Ozzy would later (I can't even say if it was hours or a day) find Twine and I cannot say get rid of the mirror, Ozzy did break it and Coil did throw away *most of it.

However by now, Twine was pretty out of it. Distressed and crying then fully dazed and out of it. He came back from that very quickly when Ozzy, *still mirror-possessed, was trying to essentially link with Coil and eat his thoughts. (Won't go into it.) Which he did indeed skewer Ozzy like a kebab for.

Notes:

"Most of it" as in he kept one piece in order to try and understand what it was for

"mirror-possesed" as in Ozzy ate the mirror. He ate the glass. He was eating glass.

Also, Twine's trident is obscenely hot, however, while not immortal, the Sun Down Thirds are immune to the effects of temperature in terms of harm. They can feel it, but they don't get frostbite or spontaneously combust. Mainly because they absorb energy a lot, or are functionally energy, and thus because the Psyche isn't /real/ in terms of the body... yeah, they just. don't take damage. (poorly explained. Apologies, its 4:30 a.m.)

[hime98]

Lonely Escape in Seoul (Lee Dong Wook x Y/N)

Chapter 9 - Slipping Away

Y/N POV

The next morning was quiet. Too quiet.

Dong Wook and I packed up in silence, the weight of the previous night still heavy in the air. Neither of us spoke as we left the small hotel in Jeju, our steps slow and heavy. It felt like the island itself didn’t want us to leave, as though it knew that whatever had been building between us was slipping away.

The plane ride back to Seoul was just as muted. Dong Wook sat by the window, staring out at the clouds. I wanted to say something—to fill the empty space with any words that might make this ache a little smaller—but I couldn’t find my voice.

I just watched him. The way his jaw tightened every now and then, the slight crease in his brows. He was lost in thought, maybe as much as I was. We were both there, together, yet the distance between us felt infinite.

When we landed in Seoul, the cold winter air hit me like a wall. Reality was waiting for us, and we couldn’t avoid it any longer.

As we pulled into the parking lot of Dong Wook’s building, a familiar figure was leaning against a car—Chang Hee, his ever-energetic best friend and manager.

“Dong Wook hyung!” Chang Hee called out, waving enthusiastically as we got out of the car. “Perfect timing. I was about to start calling you.”

Dong Wook looked wary. “What’s going on?”

“Your shoot for XX got moved. It's a shoot overnight in Gwanju,” Chang Hee explained quickly, his words tumbling over each other. “Some last-minute changes with the production, and they need you. We can't cancel. I wouldn’t have asked if it weren’t important, but we really have to go now.”

Dong Wook’s expression hardened. He glanced at me, and I saw the conflict in his eyes. “I can’t go. Chang Hee, not now.”

“It’s fine,” I said quickly, forcing a smile as I looked at him. “Work is work. You should go.”

Dong Wook shook his head. “It’s your last full day here. I’m not leaving you alone.”

I reached for his arm, giving it a small, reassuring squeeze. “Dong Wook, I’ll be fine. It’s just a day, right? You’ll be back before you know it. This is important—you shouldn’t miss it.”

His brows furrowed as he looked down at me, clearly torn. “Y/N…”

“Go,” I said softly. “I’ll be okay.”

Chang Hee grabbed his arm then, pulling him toward the car. “You heard her, hyung. Let’s go before we’re late!”

Dong Wook hesitated for just a moment longer, his gaze locked on mine. I lifted a hand in a small wave, doing my best to look composed. He finally relented, climbing into the car with a resigned sigh.

As they drove off, I stood in the parking lot, watching the vehicle disappear into the distance. I saw Dong Wook’s face in the side mirror—he was looking back, too. Our eyes met for a fleeting second before the car turned the corner and vanished from sight.

I waved until I couldn’t see him anymore, but my arm felt heavier with every second. And then I was alone.

The elevator ride up to Dong Wook’s flat was unbearable. Each ding of the floors passing made my heart sink deeper and deeper into my stomach. By the time I stepped inside his apartment, the silence hit me like a punch to the chest.

This place—the space that had become my temporary home—was empty without him. I stood in the middle of the living room, staring at nothing, feeling the tears well up in my eyes.

I sank onto the sofa, pressing my face into my hands. How did this happen? I asked myself. How had I let myself fall so deeply, so hopelessly for someone I couldn’t have?

I’d been foolish to let my guard down, to let myself believe that these past days—filled with laughter, comfort, and warmth—meant anything more than a fleeting dream.

But it felt real.

This apartment had been filled with so many small, beautiful moments. I stood slowly and began walking around the room, trailing my fingers along the furniture, the photos, the little things that made this place his. I memorized it all, burning every detail into my memory.

Flashbacks

I stopped at the kitchen counter and smiled faintly as a memory resurfaced:

Dong Wook trying to teach me how to make kimchi jjigae, only for us to end up in a flour fight after I accidentally knocked over a bag of rice flour.

“Yah, you’re a disaster!” he’d yelled, laughing as he chased me around the counter with handfuls of flour.

“And you’re a terrible teacher!” I’d shot back, my face streaked with white powder.

We laughed so hard that day that I swore my stomach hurt for hours afterward.

I moved to the sofa next, where we had spent an entire evening binge-watching old movies—him complaining about the terrible acting while I threw popcorn at him for being “too much of a critic.”

“You’re the only person I know who critiques the weather in a film,” I’d teased, earning a dramatic eye roll from him.

“Someone has to keep you cultured,” he’d quipped back, his smile soft and warm.

I reached for the bookshelf and ran my fingers across the spines of the novels there. I pulled out the one we had read together late one night when neither of us could sleep.

Dong Wook’s voice echoed in my mind as he read aloud, his deep tone calming and soothing. I remembered how I had fallen asleep against his shoulder, and how he’d carried me to the sofa without waking me.

As I packed my bags that evening, I felt every moment, every memory, settle into the suitcase alongside my clothes. I didn’t bother wiping the tears that slipped down my cheeks. This wasn’t just a goodbye to Dong Wook—it was a goodbye to everything I’d felt while I was here.

Before heading to bed, I wandered back to the living room, unable to bring myself to sleep in the bed we’d shared conversations and dreams in. I curled up on the sofa, pulling a blanket over myself.

The moonlight filtered through the windows, casting soft shadows across the room. I stared at the ceiling, blinking back more tears as the weight of everything settled over me.

How am I supposed to leave this behind?

I closed my eyes, my heart heavy, and let myself cry quietly.

Meanwhile...

Miles away, Dong Wook sat on set in Gwangju, surrounded by cameras, lights, and staff buzzing around him. But none of it registered. He couldn’t focus—couldn’t think of anything but the girl he had left behind.

Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her. That forced smile. The small wave.

He felt it—an ache deep in his chest that he couldn’t shake.

As I drifted into a restless sleep on the sofa, I clutched the blanket tightly, as though it could somehow hold me together.

Because deep down, I knew that when the sun rose tomorrow, I’d have less than day with her.

And Dong Wook… he would always be a beautiful dream I could never have.

(To be continued)

Previous — Chapter 9 — Next

[thelivingautomaton]

hello time of wheelies, i am still livetweeting the books but i am now done with book 2 and figured you all might want an update, the most important being: y'all were right about the religious freaks with coffee, good god

yeah so let's start there with the seanchan because hooooooooly fuck

literally every time any of the seanchan are on the page i just sat there open-mouthed going "oh my god these guys are such FREAKS". but it's also so galaxy brained of robert jordan to introduce another antagonistic faction but have them be completely unconnected to the ongoing battle of dark vs light + unrelated to all the other factions in the setting?

and all the insane details about their culture. the nails! the blood! the insect-like armor! THE GROLM? (they're dimension-hopping colonizers????) also i only picked up on it b/c i was on the lookout but when lord turak is talking about "caf" and saying that the aroma is almost better than the taste, i literally sat up and yelled THOSE FUCKS HAVE COFFEE

for real though it is so unbelievably funny/based for rj to be like, okay, the prophesied last battle between the forces of good and evil is about to take place, world-shattering apocalypse, make or break. meanwhile, some guys from across the ocean are gonna invade and Do A Colonialism.

also, the damane? UNBELIEVABLY fucked on every conceptual level. special shoutout to renna's cloyingly patronizing treatment of egwene though, that shit actually made my stomach churn. (also also, shoutout to nynaeve for immediately seeing the damane/sul'dam/a'dam for what they are and reacting with the extremest revulsion when she has to put the bracelet on, love u bb girl <3)

kinda wanted at least one comedic interaction in the battle of falme where a bunch of seanchan soldiers run into The Actual Ghost Of Artur Hawkwing and lose their shit though. actually i thought it was soooooo funny as a narrative choice to have the horn blown but you barely see what happens in the big clash on the ground cos you're in rand's pov and he's too busy fighting ba'alzamon in a giant laser light show in the sky

(i still. don't really understand how that worked exactly but WHATEVER, it's fine. sad about the heron blade though ;-; but at least rand got to "prove" he has/had the right to it beforehand when he defeated turak. without channeling, even! which makes it 5x more badass)

also i thought it was interesting that by around the midway point of the book you have the pov characters dealing with three different factions whose way of doing things seems strange and alien: the seanchan, the aiel, and the cairhien nobles with the great game. just thought it was an interesting parallel

also, rand trying his best to Not Participate in the great game and just getting pulled in deeper was never not funny, sorry not sorry. rand and co infiltrating barthanes's mansion to try and grab the horn and the dagger was Peak D&D Heist energy and i loved it

the other big thing that had me losing my shit was surprise! parallel dimensions

LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK. the moment that the realization hit that the washed-out otherworld that rand/hurin/loial found themselves in was an ALTERNATE UNIVERSE where artur hawkwing didn't defeat the trollocs, i fucking went crazy. and then loial talking about the excerpt from "mirrors of the wheel" and going on about worlds that are shadows of the real world! i was hooting and hollering and going "this is just like chronicles of amber" (which i highly recommend for y'all, VERY different vibe compared to wheel of time but they're super fun and you'll love them if you like the whack-ass stealthy sci-fi/genre blends in WOT)

and then the escalation to rand actively trying to use the stone and flickering through countless permutations of his own life? utterly fucking bananas. also: unbearably tragic! literally what if you lived out hundreds of versions of your life but despite the seemingly-infinite choices open to you, they all really boil down to one choice: play the role that's meant for you and be doomed by the narrative, or don't play and be doomed anyways. like. FUCK

robert jordan i am begging you to give me more insane alternate realities for your made up fantasy universe, i am begging you for more insane creepy shit like the otherworld being devoid of people and all the color washed out since it's a "weak reflection", it is SO GOOD

this is tangentially related but: i knew who """selene""" really was going in, but i did NOT know her introduction in the books was this fucking batshit, and also that she comes across as literally the shadiest motherfucker alive. "oooh, here i am in my pretty white dress being attacked by a beast, come save me! no i don't know how i got here, i was just riding! don't mind how i know a surprisingly specific amount about the portal stones! you're my hero! you can blow the horn and be a great man!" unironically i love her so much for this scheme, and how it plays off so well vs rand's insistence that he's just a shepherd + his starting to settle into the position of "lord" and/or "dragon"

but fr though i think this conflict is sooooo interesting as a central narrative theme, i.e. the choice to seek out glory and heroism for its own sake vs taking it upon yourself as your duty because there's no one else who can vs running away from that duty and responsibility. "We may be a poor pair of heroes, but we are what there is." "It was not what I was made for, but all was breaking apart, and they were alone, and I was all they had." everything with rand feeling the "threads" of his duties and "death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain" and the idea of choosing to sheathe the blade in yourself when the moment comes. and how that ties in with ingtar's final choice and his sacrifice!

it's all about the CHOICE!!! this is literally me irl rn:

oh my god what else. i loved getting so much more detail on the aes sedai (who are basically underfunded academics constantly squabbling among their respective departments, i have decided) and how channeling works/feels. (the parallel between the girls imagining saidar as a flower vs rand feeling saidin as the flame and void with a sickly light in it. chef's kiss!!! but also, rand simultaneously craving saidin and being sickened by it? chewing glass about it, nbd) verin mathwin aka The Aes Sedai Ever is unbelievably great. a lot of this book felt like buildup so i'm hype for things to start popping off, especially now that rand has apparently accepted the mantle of dragon. these books are crazy and i love them

[feedingtheflockministry]

Just Grow With It!

By Pastor Dan Hickling

In this passage, Paul makes a transition in his letter to the Philippian Church. He moves from his introduction and declaration of his love for the Philippians to expressing a very specific prayer for them. And as we will see, this prayer penned by Paul for the Philippians is also a prayer that reaches across the centuries to us, as well.

First, Paul prays the Philippian’s love would grow. By “love,” we aren’t talking about earthly affection. It’s not a “birds of a feather flock together” sort of situation. Instead, he’s praying for an increase in the supernatural “agape” type of love. This love is unconditional and comes to us directly from God, Himself. Notice how Paul puts this at the head of his prayer list, which reminds us that in the Christian life, nothing is more important than love. Love makes everything else fall into its proper place. And if we’re going to do anything well, we need to love well!

Paul then prays the Philippian’s knowledge would grow. As strong as the Philippians were in their understanding of the Lord and faith, there was still room to grow. In a wonderful way, the Christian is always a student. There’s always something new for us to learn about our eternal and infinite God. Ours is a lifestyle of discovery, and as we discover more and more about the Lord, we grow closer to Him.

Next, Paul prays the Philippian’s discernment would grow. This prayer has a logical progression because discernment is the practical application of spiritual knowledge. It’s taking spiritual information and truth and then putting it to use in real-world scenarios of life. We make our decisions about things based on what we discern about them. This is why some have a lot of knowledge, yet their lives are in shambles. They have the data but lack the discernment on how to use it to their advantage. Paul wanted something so much better for the Philippians, which is why he prays for an increase in discernment. This would allow them to approve of what was right and live sincerely and inoffensively in the eyes of God.

Lastly, Paul prays the Philippian’s fruitfulness would grow. The fruit he’s referring to is the Christ-like character that comes from being connected to Him. We can’t help but be reminded of Christ’s promise that all those who abide in Him will also be fruitful (John 15:5). Jesus is saying those who are in Him will also be like Him, and that’s the very outcome Paul is praying for here—that they would grow more and more like Jesus, which results in our main mission here on the earth which is to glorify God!

What Paul wanted for the Philippians, the Lord wants for us. He wants us to grow in love, knowledge, discernment, and fruitfulness. May we continue growing according to God’s will as He continues His good work in us!

Youversion Bible plan Philippians Whatever Happens

[mydudejc]

Why I've Been Away From This Blog

When you look hard enough into anything, your faith can dissolve. And I've been in the process of de-Christianizing my worldview. Which, strangely, has brought me back.

I want to emphasize that I don't believe in any of it literally. There's a set mythology just like anything else. I don't believe Jesus as a single person ever existed. He's an amalgamation of a movement.

However, I am an animist. Spirits exist and always have.The idea of a salvation spirit or spirit which defeats death is nothing new or even unique.

I view "God" (if I can even call it that anymore) as a false singularity of infinite multitudes. Points of light creating a illusory sun, a grand mycelium network spouting cosmic fungi. Sometimes I feel it can't hear us, sometimes I can.

I still believe that there can be a spirit of salvation, of hope, or just one that looks familiar spouting from the infinite multitudes. Maybe there's one, maybe many, who knows. It doesn't matter.

Whatever I've been calling "Jesus" is a tendril of this mycelium reaching out to me. It doesn't mean that the spirits and ancestors I've interacted with are any less real. It's all real, in a way.

Christianity has important messages, important historical significance. I no longer believe in *any* of its doctrines like sin, demons, incarnation, ect, but I do believe in the people who did.

[coolcattime]

Old Conflicts Come to Surface [Mianite Oneshot]

Characters: Captain Capsize, Jordan Captainsparklez

Relationships: N/A

AO3 Link

The sea was calm with only the lightest breeze present, bringing only the smell of the water but not the spray typical of waves. These conditions were those that had become Capsize’s preferred ones for when she was alone. Actually being alone was somewhat of a rarity, more so than it had been in her previous life anyway. And while that was a good thing, she still liked the opportunity to decompress anyway from the relative crowd of people that now resided on the isle. And with the sea like this, sitting on the docks she could almost imagine she was back home. Back in a city that was lost so long ago now, that even though she knew it had been rebuilt in her absence she was unsure if she’d ever return. She knew she’d be welcome, but she didn’t want to face those who looked at her as a hero when she didn’t feel like one, when she didn’t even feel like herself.

As it turns out, being revived after at least one failed revival and a length of time everyone she asked seemed to disagree on had had some effects on her memory. It wasn’t as if she had lost everything, as far as she was concerned she remembered everything important, but she didn’t notice the gaps until she was directly confronted with them. Basically, she was never really going to know how big an issue it was. And that was fine, she was happy to be alive, but it did still bug her. She was missing information about herself, most of which she didn’t even realise was missing. So, when she had moments to herself, she’d been sneaking off to the docks to read one of her old journals to see if she could get any fuzzy memories to form within the blank gaps. She hadn’t gotten any results thus far, but that wasn’t going to stop her from continuing to try.

It was in this position, sat leading against the railings of the docks, surrounded by the familiar smell of salt water, that one of the carefully handwritten sentences was interrupted by an annoyed voice belonging to someone casting a shadow over her.

“You’re avoiding Ianite,” Jordan said, looking down at the pirate captain who up until this moment had really been enjoying her day. He stood, waiting for a response, as she contemplated just ignoring him until he went away. However tempting that slightly immature idea was, she knew that he was unfortunately far too stubborn to leave without some sort of answer.

“Can’t avoid her, she still has a very direct line to telepathically chat whenever she wants. I just, you know, haven’t felt the need to go to Aethoria lately,” She didn’t look up when telling the half-answer. Despite how she was no longer reading, she kept looking at her journal intently with the dim hope that if it looked like she was in the middle of something this conversation might be postponed, preferably infinitely. Because she didn’t want to have this conversation. She didn’t want to actually admit that she was avoiding Ianite, because she just knew he wasn’t going to be quiet about his opinions on the matter.

"No, you haven't spoken to her at all since Tom and I got back," The amount of certainty in his voice made it clear that the goddess had spoken to him about these concerns which aggregated Capsize. She had to have known what it would lead to. If she wanted a conversion so badly, she should just force one instead of venting to her champion. Jordan stared harder, waiting for a real answer as he was unsure of what could be driving her to act this way. But she stayed silent. So, he decided to continue. "Seriously? Are you that annoyed about me being back that you decided to be all standoffish again?"

"You really want to do this?" She said, suddenly snapping the book closed. The shift was quick enough that the champion almost took a step back. That was not the response he expected, but he couldn’t let her keep doing this. Whatever problem she had with him shouldn’t extend to their goddess.

“Yes. I want to know why you’re suddenly avoiding our goddess after everything we’ve been through,” He said, already far too impassioned for her liking. Acting as if Ianite was owed her presence, as if he was owed an answer for her absence. As if her staying away was some massive betrayal. And she just knew that if she didn’t answer him he was going to stay standing there all day assuming. So, not willing to literally be looked down throughout this conversation, she stood. For the first time, they both met each other’s eyes, and both looked annoyed in a different way. If anyone else could see them, they would be rushing over to try and drag one of them anyway. But there was nobody. For better or worse, this conversation was happening.

“I’ve been avoiding her because I’m fed up with the way she looks at me. She keeps looking at me with pain and regret and that’s not something I’ve really been in the mood for,” She couldn’t stand how Ianite looked at her now. It was always such a pained look. And nothing she did made them soften. “She doesn’t treat me like she did before I died and I’m not in the mood for that.”

“Seriously that’s it?” He couldn’t believe her. She was meant to be loyal like him. To just give up on Ianite for such a reason was ridiculous. And Capsize wanted to slap him.

“Is that not good enough for you?” She scoffed. How dare he. Who was he to decide what level of discomfort was she meant to suffer through to interact with a person? Oh right, the high and mighty Champion of Balance. The man who got to decide her feelings for her. Why would he have stopped doing that? “I’ll go suffer through her looking at me like I came back wrong so you both feel better.”

“You did come back wrong. It was a whole big thing. Excuse her for still having some guilt over that,” He couldn’t believe how difficult she was being. Sure, she was fine now, but that didn’t erase the memories of her coming back as a feral corpse, her pained voice begging for help. She frowned. Or perhaps scowled. It was hard to tell outwardly if the comment had upset her or just pissed her off. Or, at least, it was hard for him to tell. Anyone else would be backing away or quickly retracting their statement.

“Oh right, I forgot about that, no one’s mentioned it. Except Sonja after her and Spark actually revived me. And Tucker when I talked to him for the first time. And my brother when he was having a panic attack because I was alive again!” She’s getting louder. Not quite yelling, but certainly getting close to it. She didn’t remember the failed revival, though she’d heard the story enough times that she knew what happened. Obviously she knew it was bad, but no one else looked at her like Ianite did. Well, maybe Red did, but, well, he was a very different story right now. He was also the cause of a twinge of guilt running through Jordan as at the mention of him, he couldn’t help but remember man was still not okay. That he was still coming to grips with Capsize being alive after what he’d had to do. That their interactions still had to be limited. But that wasn’t the conversation right now. He wasn’t going to get guilted out of this. “She should be used to me being back by now!”

“What and avoiding her is meant to get her used to it?”

“No one else needs to ‘get used to it’ who doesn’t have a real excuse! Most people are just happy I’m alive!” She was so sick of it all. Why should she have to put up with Ianite’s self-loathing that she did it wrong. She’d even asked Sonja if the goddess had started looking at her weirdly, but she said no. It was just her that was now somehow different in her eyes. Was it too much to ask for things to just be normal? Even if the normal she wanted wasn’t ever going to happen again. And, yes, maybe she resented that, but how was that any of his business? Jordan frowned.

“Obviously she’s happy you’re alive. She just…” He paused, Capsize staying quiet only to see what excuse he was cooking up. He racked his brains for the right words, for the right description of his Lady’s struggles. Then something hit him. “If that’s what this is really about, why did this only start when I got back?”

He spoke like he had figured out an unspoken truth, while she just looked annoyed. It always came back to him, didn’t it? His goddamn self-importance.  It was worse that he had it right, that this was about him. And she wondered if he was going to be happy about that. No time like the present to find out.

“Oh, it’s pretty simple,” She said in a tone she knew would annoy him. Even after everything, she still knew how to push his buttons. And was she ever glad for that, watching his face scrunch up before she’d really said anything at all. “She doesn’t need me now. You’re acting like this is all on me, but she hasn’t once reached out either. Not since her precious champion came back.”

“You’re still jealous?!”

“Still?”

“Come on! I’m not oblivious, you know!” She snorts at those words. “I know you wanted to be Ianite’s champion, that you never respected that I was instead of you.”

“I just wanted to be treated the same as I was before you appeared out of nowhere! I mean, I only dedicated my life to her, I suppose it’s a bit much to not want to be replaced out of nowhere!” She can’t believe how he doesn’t get it. That just boiling it down to her being jealous is simplistic. She could’ve understood his position if she hadn’t been side-lined. If everything she’d done hadn’t been forgotten in favour of him. If he’d treated her with any respect. Was it so wrong that she didn’t forget how that felt? To just be expected to be happy to help this champion she’d been surprised with the existence of. “I gave her everything just to be overshadowed!”

“And what? You think I didn’t give her everything? You know the amount of mocking I went through! What I had to sacrifice!”

“You didn’t know a damn thing about sacrifice back then! Just because you’ve lost now doesn’t make it retroactive!” She knows she’s being harsh. That he went through terrible things in the other world. But she remembers him back then. And she knows back then he didn’t know the same loss she did. And that wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t even a bad thing, but to pretend that he knew. Now that was something that infuriated her. “The moment I was chosen to be her messenger, I got a target put on my back. I lost basically my whole crew getting here, and my home got destroyed in the meantime. My ship got destroyed gods knows how many times. And up until the point where I literally died, she was lecturing me about who I wanted to be friends with.”

“You mean asking you not to be a complete asshole to me?” He pushed at her last statement, trying to force the point. He knew she didn’t respect him, that she had never respected him. He just didn’t understand what was so wrong with him that she never even tried. It’s not like she had trouble with anyone but him.  “Clearly she should’ve let you continue to disrespect me!”

“You mean like she let you keep disrespecting me?! You never got lectured about that, did you?” She was so fed up with him acting like this one sided. Like he never wronged her. And he just looked confused. He looked like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. And he was confused. Because he had been friendly hadn’t he? He saw her as an equal, he tried her as one, wasn’t that what he was meant to do?

“I—I didn’t disrespect you,” For the first time, he faltered a little. Because as sure as he was that what he was saying was right, he also saw how she looked. It wasn’t the usual annoyance he’d become used to. It was something more. Like she would just walk anyway from this conversation if he wasn’t standing in the way.

“Is that really how you remember it?” She said in a low tone. She couldn’t believe him. How could he have not looked inward in all the time that had passed for him? “I remember you disregarding the idea that I was a person with opinions. You just assumed everything. Obviously, I’ll tell you whatever you want to know about Ianite regardless of if I know who you are. Obviously, you’d be co-captain. Obviously, you could mess around with my ship when you had no idea what you were doing. Obviously, you can date me!”

She practically spits the last one, as the resentment comes in boiling bubbles to the surface. The amount she was expected to put up with by Ianite with no sympathy for her growing frustrations. And hearing his actions said out loud, the guilt hit Jordan in a wave. He’d realised a while back that they’d never actually dated, that she liked the others much more than she liked him. But in all his realisations, he’d never reflected back on how Capsize must’ve felt. And now, with her looking at her with such anger, it was impossible to ignore.

“And I know you got egged on with that last one, but you still should’ve asked if I wanted any of those things,” Her tone is softer, though exhausted rather than understanding. She’s had so long to think about this moment, about confronting him for the disrespect, but actually experiencing it wasn’t as satisfying as she thought it would be. He just looked sad. Not angry or self-righteous. He looked wounded. And while, yes that’s how he should feel, it didn’t feel good to see someone like that. She knew it wasn’t as fresh to him as it was to her, that he’d had time for the memories to fade. And maybe this whole thing was resentful of her. “Look, I know I wasn’t nice to you, and you can yell at me all you want for that. I just… I wanted Ianite to treat me like she had before, I still just want that. And for you to like to chill out a little.”

“No, I’m not gonna… I don’t think I’m in the position to yell at you,” With that both of them sort of slumped. Neither of them felt great about the ‘conversation’ they’d just had, but their festering tempers had been snuffed for the time being. For the first time, the two sat together with neither wanting to tear into the other. Nowhere close to being friends, but still the closest they had ever been. And in the calm, Jordan decided to ask something. “Are you going to talk with Ianite again?”

“Eventually… Could never bring myself to stay away forever,” She says. The exact tone in her voice was odd to Jordan, it wasn’t exactly one you’d expect of a devoted follower speaking of their goddess. But it wasn’t the time to push into that. “I just need some time, that’s all.”

And with that, the two of them fell silent. Different people than when they had first met, and now with a different understanding of the other. And while there were still conversations that needed to be had, and actions that needed to be made up for, this was perhaps just what they needed to start anew.

[witchcraftandburialdirt]

describe their dream home. looks, location, decorations, etc. and what is their idea of the afterlife? does it scare them? (for robibi)

IMPORTANT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT QUESTIONS ═══ LEAGUE VERSE ═══

⎯⎯⎯⎯ Describe their dream home.  looks, location, decorations, etc.

This is actually extremely difficult for Robin to imagine due to the fact that practically all of the places he has lived throughout his life have been filled with his own resentment for various different reasons. His childhood home in Zaun always filled him with immense dread despite that he was living with his family and loved ones:

Upon being born in the Entresol Level, it is not difficult to see how one could quickly grow uncertain about their own existence. Leaning over the edge of the Sump, the denizens faced threats from above and below. Disease, suffocating smog, chembarons attacking businesses and selling children off for profit, the wardens and enforcers seemingly snuffing out any sense of individualism that could lead to chaos... How horrible to try and make a home in a place where everything seems to want you dead.

His time in the Academy was hellish, afterward he was living in a nice apartment in Piltover but it was riddled by loneliness and having no real connections due to living with Abel. It would have been fine if Robin could forget what Abel is, but his unwavering knowledge of the callousness of the creature mirroring his own empathy was enough to remind him how fake it all was.

The thing he had once thought of as a friend was but a mere illusion; an idea, poised to ruin his world as soon as he give it life through his own belief. A predator that had waited for its dinner to wear itself out in the cataclysmic loss of love, and the destructive nature of grief.

Finally, even within Ionia Robin is practically homeless, I say practically because while he does have a roof over his head its extremely decrepit and has been overtaken by nature and vines. Its an abandoned shack that is mostly dark and has very little protection from the elements; and while he has cultivated the land for his own use it still is in the deep Ionian woods. Forests and woodlands are not welcome to humans in any capacity, we are aliens there and everything - once again - is trying to kill him or run him out. Now with that all out of the way, as I felt context was important for this, Robin's dream home is honestly anywhere stable that he feels safe in; he doesn't require anything incredibly fancy or lavish, and just wants to be secure. Within Modern Verse he is currently living with Danny in his apartment and while it is extremely nice - it isn't why he likes it so much. In Locum Tenes he's living in a small, too-hot apartment in Piltover and he thinks its perfect due to it having 4 key aspects. Companionship. Connectedness. Security. Stability. We've discussed him living within the Order of Shadows before as well, I think given his relationship with Zed (whatever it may be) as well as being able to be useful and not worrying about keeping everything stable and steady and good 100% of the time, he would love it there too. He is an easy man to please in regards to that sort of thing.

⎯⎯⎯⎯ What is their idea of the afterlife? does it scare them?

Given its been well established Robin has previously died, he has actually seen his own version of the afterlife. Whether or not this is permanently altered due to his contract he cannot say. When Robin died he recalled seeing a permanent darkness, something deeper than black that seemed infinitely small and infinitely large.

"That...creature...in the darkness I felt a thousand eyes in that world of unending night, a place where every drop of sunlight had dissolved." His voice wobbled as he spoke with that haunting stare, "I do not think that I will...ever be able to escape that feeling. Knowing that is what lies ahead for me is...well, I only hope that the actions of the future change that fate."

As you can probably tell the idea of being in that space forever is very daunting to him, and it is something that he is very much afraid of re-entering. Granted, whether a blessing or a curse, he can't die again until Bel (the demon) gives him the go ahead. Before this interaction and before his death Robin didn't think much on the topic of what lay beyond, even when his family died he viewed it as a void. He was never a spiritual person and people dying was such a regular happening in Zaun that the idea that there could be more after just...never really came to be for him. His thoughts about it is that the person is simply gone.