#like what is the point of me going lol that thing some ppl like is stupid and bad
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I think my favorite thing about doing ginger red hair instead of cherry red hair is: lying to people about it
#I love the cherry red / wine red and I'll probably go back at some point bc it's my Origin.#but for now.#I don't actively lie to people but bc it's a Natural and Plausible hair color#and I'm already pale and I dye my eyebrows to match my hair. ppl figure it's natural#and it has come up MULTIPLE TIMES. and I've recently been rolling with it instead of correcting ppl. bc who cares?#recent examples that come to mind (but I did correct them in this one) my surgeon assuming it was natural#and using my genetics as a natural redhead as a baseline to tell me about what I can expect from my future scarring#and then again later with the anesthesia. they were going to dose me differently#the anesthesiologist glanced at me when I came into the OR and was getting the stuff ready on his cart#and when he heard me talking to my doc and re-telling him that oh the hair isn't natural#he was behind the curtain like FUCK#taking shit off his cart and quietly redoing his setup#that's how I learned that redheads need higher doses of anesthesia than other ppl.#they also need more of the topical stuff like lidocaine. apparently they metabolize it faster(?)#ANYWAY he was going to up my dose thinking I needed it lol#so i almost got way more sedatives and pain meds than i needed bc of my hair dye LMAOOO#other more Normal Life examples was a country dude in full hunting gear holding a door open for me someplace#and I said thank you and he lifted his hat up to point at his (natural) red hair and said ''twins!''#this one sticks with me because that was such a cute thing to do. what the hell#and at snakefest I was talking to some people at their food truck. there was an older guy who trapped me into a convo for like 30mins#he was Very Nice. and they were going to some type of irish festival next and said I should go too bc I'll be right at home#flat out just was like. this bitch looks irish#and I don't know why all of this is so funny to me. it has no reason to be.
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one day we will talk about how tennis fans talk about/treat players they find attractive versus players they dont…………
#and sorry but. a lot of you do this!#im sure i do it as well#but sometimes it’s just feels like…idk really obvious that that’s what’s happening#idk it pisses me off. but especially with the wta it feels reductive sometimes to call it out#like ‘oh you’re only supporting her bc she’s pretty’ like EWWW. what a nasty thing to say#BUT i do think it’s true sometimes!!!!#not that people only support players they think are pretty#but that people are far more sympathetic or that they’re more likely to get behind a player they aren’t *usually* a fan of#does this make sense?#and i think it extends to the atp as well but partially less obvious bc ppl let men get away with anything anyway lol#lowkey it feels mean to talk about because any comparisons i make have to insinuate someone’s attractiveness…#but like it really feels like the elephant in the room sometimes…like how do you not see what you’re doing here#and can i be real! i think karo is a massive beneficiary of this!#and i think that’s part of why i notice it so much because i notice the way people talk about her and support her (which of course i love)#but then i compare that with other players who have had similar stories…and i feel like i do have the perspective here—#because i see so much of what is said about karo#so it feels quite obvious when she’s honestly? treated *very* well considering her career#we’ve seen plenty of players who have injury issues who are just labeled inconsistent or as having ‘physical issues’#i think karo gets a lot of sympathy in comparison…and id even go so far as to say i think she’s overhyped sometimes!#which i know is a wild thing to say as a huge fan of hers but i think it’s true! idk. this is not really the point but im trying to explain#what i meant by the earlier tags. that some players who are seen as attractive are given way more leniency in general
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maybe it's to maintain a sense of tension & turmoil that would eventually reach an explosive peak, a sense of tug-of-war, a back-and-forth to hammer home the ideals they want to deliver and for the viewers to chew on, but although these arguments regarding hiroshi & his stance as a man torn between his loyalty for his country & the loyalty for his Filipino friends and lover is of course important, how they write these scenes & the points they present from this week alone is getting too repetitive...? literally the argument scenes from last night & tonight between adelina & hiroshi is basically the same; the ideas were the same, the dynamics were the same: the aggressive, radical adelina, bristling rage and fear over the injustices she's seen thus far, and the cautious, inspiriting hiroshi, all hopefulness and reassurance one moment as a lover, defensiveness and sternness as a japanese soldier in another. this debate will be ever-present ofc, it is one of the series' biggest conflicts, but it is unfortunately so easy to tell when it is a.) being pulled up as a main topic to move the plot along / be a necessary conflict for character development/introspection / be the conflict to deliver the morals & messages the writers want to send to their viewers, or b.) when it is being pulled up only for the drama and filler to pass the time. like watching the characters sit down to argue for 10 minutes, do other things for the plot for 2 minutes, then sit down again to argue for the next 20 minutes. lol.
#lots of things i wish they would soon improve but this 1 bothered me tonight..stopped watching halfway thru#these scenes would be like excellent breaks for when we need to take a breather to digest what's been going on#but at the slow pace they've set it it's just...nothing's been going on since like...4 days ago#except for eduardo's plot#it's just arguments..everywhere....all the time....over the same repetitive things#no progress nothing new to chew on despite there being drastic changes to their situation...? same vibes from the time they weren't occupie#yet lol. same dynamics mostly#only new points of debate is regarding hiroshi & his country vs friends conflict#& carmela being desperate to go back to comfort & luxury vs her family standing as firm as they could against the occupation#ahhh i am sooo not eloquent enough to express my full thoughts but like!!! fellow viewers if y'all r here u understand me right lmfoskadhsg#finding it hard to criticize bc i'm trying to make sense of where they r coming from#a.) seeing as unlike mcai this is a complete original story it's hard to see what direction they'd like to take it to#b.) fil shows really find it hard to break away from their normal formulas of family dramas & bastard children & love triangles :'))))#god the opportunity to tell a refreshing diff story but this is like gma show 67627627th but set in the japanese era....then mixed with 50%#of the mcai show feel#the editing the visuals the acting = good. 60% of the story line = can be compared to the hundreds of gma shows we've seen be4#anywy going off on a tangent...#c.) i can understand the slow pacing as them trying to establish the settings & the feel of that era so that the more intense tragedies-#later on would hit harder#but again. few scenes feel like they're dragging on for too long. some scenes & themes r too repetitive#need to see something differenttt something fresh something developing. something moving & feeling & connecting w/the audience#need to see more of the Philippines & the Filipino people in the 40s!! not the same afternoon prime drama shot in intramuros#need to see their messages staring into our souls instead of just being words uttered in tears#all this to say....flop era this week tbh sorry#EXCEPT FOR MAX COLLINS & HER LIKE. 3 MINS SCREEN TIME. MAX COLLINS I LOVE U QUEEN#rambles#pulang araw#putting this in the main tag i KNOW some ppl out there would feel the same & can explain this better lol i swear????
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I've been playing slitherio these past few days, and after some time messing around with nicknames and my own experience with the stuff, I've realized anger is something very easy to weaponize. On my second attempt of having "trans rights" as a nickname I killed a huge ~5k point worm as a teenie tiny 200 point worm simply because it was so desperate to kill me specifically. Anger makes your life harder, but it also makes people really unwise. I fucking bet this is in "the art of war", even though I haven't read it.
#Slitherio#Slither.io#If all these russian and pro war bastards can make me angry I damn bet I can try and make them mad too lol#It's such a pity pride flags aren't available in slitherio idc if the creators hate lgbt or not this is a great game mechanic#Users are easy to miss and if I'm a 6000 point long 💕🔵⚪🔵💕 worm people will go to me to fuck me up lol#Did I mention that I got to like 6200 barely attacking other worms myself? I don't think I did#I didn't count how much I attacked though so it doesn't count I should do a full defence kills run#If I play optimally I can get to a very big number I feel#You guys should try it too it's actually surprisingly fun if you're the kind of person to let go of things#Again though one good rule I learned these past few days is if someone's nickname makes you angry -> turn the other way#Being named 'trans rights' made me a target but also people attacking me were so much sloppier than when I was named 'meow'#It might be largely bc of the sheer number of attempts but hey. I've been there & I lost a few times specifically bc I was mad at some ppl#//interesting#Is the art of war a hard read though? Has anyone read it? I've heard it's fun#Oh yeah the mandatory vacation is messing with me a lot how'd you guess that?#Just don't think what this constant and never ending aggression towards a slogan in support of someone's existence in an online game says#about what it's like living in the world for these people#I've been mad at this at first but I'm starting to dig the shitty/absent censorship of both bigoted and also gay things. No hear me out...
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Google how to make peace with the fact that you will always be vaguely to extremely uncomfortable (depending on the day) with your body and how others perceive it until the day you die and nothing you do will ever change that
#I almost wish I was much more masc leaning than I am#so the answer would just simply be ‘go on t’#I keep seeing so many posts that are like hrt is good! this is your sign to go on hrt if you’ve ever wanted to!#GOD I wish I were that simple#(those aren’t bad posts that’s not the point they’re just not applicable to me and seeing the sentiment makes me sad and a bit frustrated)#(cuz for me it’s not that easy)#like are there some things T would do to my body that I would like?#yes absolutely. I would LOVE a deeper voice and fat redistribution#but like. that’s it#I would not want it to do anything else#in fact that idea of anything else and potentially ‘passing’ as a man makes me VISCERALLY uncomfortable#I do not want to be a man and I do not want ppl to perceive me as a man#but the same is true for being a woman#I do not like a lot of feminine traits but I do not want to strictly trade them for masculine ones#UNFORTINATELY you cannot pick and choose the affects of hrt#there is no way to ‘look androgynous’ (which is what I want)#(yes ik you can use shapewear and makeup and contour and that can do SOME)#(but it’s A LOT of work and effort I don’t have time or energy to do every day)#(and there’s still some things about my body I wouldn’t be able to alter doing stuff like that)#and it’s like sure I could go on T. but I’d still have this problem just the opposite direction#and it. sucks#it sucks so hard knowing there’s literally no conceivable way I will ever just have a body#that correlates to how I feel gender wise and will get people to ‘gender me correctly’#just based on how I look#and it’s something I’ve been thinking about recently a lot and it’s making me FHDJDKKSSKKSKS in a bad way#I know it’s cuz it’s pride month and I follow A LOT of trans ppl#who are posting trans pride and hrt and surgery info and stuff#(and obviously these are all very good things as I said)#it’s just. because of my particular situation they make me feel… bad#because I won’t ever have an option to be comfortable and happy with how I look lol
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Since I'd been talking a lot about JP Vesperia (primarily Yuri and Flynn and the heavy changes that surround them, and because I'm highly passionate about them in their original context), I wanted to compile some more jarring if not outright glaring mistakes in the localization (or what were likely intentional changes, because I can't look at some of these and just call them "mistakes"). I'm not going to mention every little change throughout the game, so smaller things I'll mostly be leaving out (namely things that don't really affect characters or context). I primarily just wanted to give some insight on some of the bigger parts.
Some of the changes seem to have been mistakes in translation itself (not just localization, but misunderstanding what was being said in general; such as, there's an instance I mention of that between Patty and Don), so I've got some mentions hanging around for clarity purposes as some scenes didn't make much sense, likely because of this.
Vocal tone with Yuri was the most prominent issue that got me making this, and the context that was changed being right after if not equally next to that (most often also with Yuri but also Flynn).
This is something that has been bothering me for a while and I've been wanting to share this stuff with people interested in seeing the game with its original context. Generally speaking, the plot and story themselves are on point. The majority of the differences surround Yuri and Flynn respectively, so there's going to be a lot of mention of them throughout.
I've also posted video clips of my favorite scenes and the heavy changes, so consider those a supplement to this and vice versa.
Part 2.
Part 3.
Part 4.
(Other) GTF Favorites.
I'd like to preface this by mentioning the chief director and producer of the game itself has also spoken about localization inaccuracy issues, so that's something to keep in mind (it's in Japanese, but you should be able to use the offered post translator).
I'd also like to preface this by mentioning that in the original, Yuri is more playful and relaxed/casual (generally but including with Flynn, which the dub pretty much entirely changed until arc 3), but also gentler and softer. He has a very large variety of tonal behaviors/tonal "moods" that were pretty much nuked from the dub.
Basically, to get the full experience for Yuri, I can only really recommend playing the game in JP audio. Obviously you won't get the actual context because all you'll have is the dub context, but that's also partly why I'm making these posts - to cover the contextual changes while the video clips cover some of the tonal changes (because lbh I don't expect anyone to actually go watch the entire game in JP with subtitles unless you're as insanely dedicated as I am, and I'm largely doing it out of my love for the original Yuri and Flynn and my disdain for how the localization treated them).
As a heads up, there won't be many skits in here because I'm going through a specific YT playthrough for these screenshots. Specific skits won't always come up in the playthrough in question, and I can't find a whole list of skits in JP anywhere online. I don't have all skits unlocked in my own save either yet (you can unlock all skits with Grade which I have yet to do in the DE), so I can't use that to compare all skits right now.
There are plenty of small changes here and there that I won't be including in these posts because there are some sentence changes that aren't impactful but do exist. I just don't want to be here for a year covering the random changes that don't matter much. I'm also not going to include details of a lot of honorifics because I'd be here all day, but there is one one major instance that I mention later on.
For reference if anything wants to actually watch the game in JP with the subs (it goes until just after Hypionia), most of the references come from here. Since in some cases the subber just reused localized text even when the context wasn't the same, I did bring some of those up in these posts too. These were subbed before the DE version came out. I used screenshots with subs where possible to make it easier to follow along.
I have a lot of passion for JP Yuri and I hope I can pass on some of that passion to others. 🙏
Apologies in advance if some of these sound cranky. If I sound cranky about some specific changes, it's probably because I am.
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Since I talked about the whole, Raven being shady and Yuri therefore not being grateful to him incident that the localization for some reason butchered and made Yuri sound like a generally ungrateful or just outright dumb person who doesn't understand gratitude, I'll summarize that one again here:
Yuri has a skit with Estelle originally talking about how he can't find himself being grateful to someone like Raven for showing him how to sneak out of the castle. Basically, Raven is shady and he's not sure he should be grateful to someone like that, and is confused as to why Estelle would be so grateful when she doesn't even know him (because in his mind, he isn't sure he wants to trust a guy with those vibes). The dub just kinda... makes him sound like an ungrateful jerk and not so much because he's not sure he wants to trust Raven. It doesn't really sound like it's an issue of his with Raven specifically but more that he just generally doesn't feel grateful for the aid (and that in general one shouldn't feel grateful for aid like this), which gives off a really wrong impression of him that doesn't hold up throughout the game. Yuri wasn't wholly ungrateful for the gesture itself, but because of who it came from (and I imagine a weird peppy guy in jail is good cause to be skeptical).
We start off we a classic "Yuri, you idiot!" that was changed to "come on already!".
Yuri's response to Estelle mentioning he'd been in the knights doesn't actually give a time frame for how long he'd been there (the dub made up three months, but there was never originally even a time frame given).
Here when Yuri asks Estelle why she can't just leave, her response indicates she actually does know why. The dub made it more ambiguous, which could be easily misinterpreted as she really doesn't know, so I'm dropping this one here.
For some reason the localization seemed to have Estelle responding to Karol directly about the ace always performing their attack last ("I don't think so"). What she was referring to was the tiny monster that walked by, asking for confirmation that that monster was not the eggbear they were looking for (I wasn't gonna fight with the video to get a better screenshot without the annoying YT red bar in the way so the monster is in the corner mid-movement lol). Not sure if that was a genuine mistake, but it was an odd one.
(Also, side note and not putting an image here because it's more general, but Yuri refers to Karol as "Karol-sensei" which was translated in the localization to "Captain Karol". Basically, Yuri calls him "sensei" because that's a teacher/professor, and he's making a play on Karol's knowledge and being their "teacher" about monsters/maps/etc.)
I'd say this is more along the lines of overexaggerating and not overreacting, but this line was literally changed to "haha" in the dub. The whole point wasn't that Yuri just brushed her comment off or found it funny. At this point he still literally thinks she's exaggerating about her lack of knowledge out in the world, her excitement, etc.
Not the only instance you'll find of the dub just changing entire sentences to something meaningless as if they ??? didn't know what it meant (they actually changed Patty saying an entire sentence to "aye"). In some cases they added entire sentences that weren't even there...
Even though I can kind of see where they went with the dub here, the point was supposed to be that Flynn actively thought he would be happy for Yuri to go outside the barrier and see the world.
The dub changed this to Flynn saying that he, in the now, is happy that Yuri is outside the barrier, but then says he got a little less happy when he saw the wanted poster, indicating he was previously happy but got less happy, yet says in that moment that he is happy.
It's a weird case of (past/present) tense usage for the most part, but they also removed the fact that Flynn is literally saying "I thought I would be happy" (thus expressing he'd been wanting Yuri to see the world outside the barrier and would've been happy to find out he did). The reason he's not finding himself happy is because of the wanted poster and the crimes listed on it, following up that his honest happiness for Yuri (ultimately because of the poster) was a lie.
This also means they removed Flynn expressing the honesty of his happiness for a positive concept for Yuri, which, given all the changes toward Flynn in the dub, already now takes away from the fact that he'd been actively hoping for good things for someone and we're left with this more sarcastic take on him being "happy".
Obviously his happiness wasn't really a lie because most of the crimes were falsified (primarily the ones that would make him actually mad, because Flynn has had to have been aware this whole time that Yuri has committed small time crimes for the past few years now), but at the time, the focus on this conversation is that Flynn thought he'd be happy at a time that Yuri left the barrier; meaning he'd been hoping for it prior to it happening.
I'm also mentioning it because it's the very first in a whole line of changes the dub made to their relationship (and it's their first in game interaction ffs) and to Flynn himself as he's perceived as a character. The original is much more expressive of how important they are to each other in a lot of various ways.
Inserting the JP audio version of the following scene with Flynn here.
And... the following one from there.
This was changed to "damn, we if lose our balance...". I know they did it because Yuri had just fallen over, but I'm including this one because the context isn't... really the same thing?
This dub change is a bit odd to me. They had him saying something along the lines of "she is a princess after all" in the dub, regarding the council backing her.
The original context is more like, the council is backing her and he's hearing it directly from Ioder and he probably doubts Ioder would lie like that or about that, cementing that yes, she truly is, like he suspected, a princess, but it's almost still a bit odd to know. It's sort of like, he knew/had suspicions but hearing it directly from Ioder just confirms it for certain.
The dub just made it sound like well yeah, it's obvious they'd want to back her, she's a princess... but Ioder is a prince, so that doesn't explain why they're not backing him. She is a princess after all, so of course they'd back her... but what's stopping them from backing the prince?
Another weird one for me. In the dub Yuri says that "even the Commandant was a little in over his head", when he actually... really wasn't? All he did was step in. Things got bad enough that he had to, but he wasn't in over his head. Not sure how or why the dub ended up with that.
An example of the dub having a habit of just adding in random lines that didn't actually exist (and in this case the one added didn't even contextually make sense. This was no thank you from him, this was literally him making Yuri do something for him because he was going to ask Flynn for a favor and ended up with Yuri in the cell instead).
Another super weird one in the dub. They had Yuri saying Flynn was "too" late, implying he hadn't made it in time, but he did. He made it just before the battle started, but the original context only says he's late, not too late (which makes sense given that they were ready to fight but hadn't started yet).
This was changed to Yuri just mentioning there was one way they could get out of there without actually saying what it was, and Judith saying if he thinks it might work what's the harm in trying it out. Not sure why they changed Yuri literally telling her his plan, so... again, a super weird change that I don't get why they didn't just keep the context the way it was.
Third image was changed to "someone get me away from this psycho", which... I also don't get why they put that there unless they just wanted so much flavor text that they wanted to change the whole "they're in a fight and he's telling her not to come over here because he's pissed at her because they're fighting" part of the fake fight they had going on.
Not one I have a huge problem with, but definitely good examples of them going out of their way to change just... perfectly normal stuff that literally has no reason to be changed? Some of it is flavor text and some of it feels over the top for me. Stuff that makes me like... why would you change that when there was no reason to? Could be more of a personal pet peeve of mine, but I just don't like unnecessary changes when there was nothing wrong or odd about the original text and doesn't at all come off odd in English. Unfortunately Vesperia got littered with those.
I didn't feel like getting a whole video for this, but basically Judith gives a little laugh instead of just the more upset/distressed(?) sound she made in the dub. Feels more fitting imo to keep up the "lie" Yuri started for her. The dub makes it seem more like she feels guilty, versus here she's giving a little forced giggle to go along with it. Again, a change I'm not sure why they put in.
Ngl I get completely different vibes from these. The JP comes across more as concern, rather than... treating them like they're some mob on the loose...?
Once again, this gives off negative vibes toward Flynn as a character imo.
Here Judith gives more of a reason for coming with them, which they changed in the dub to "with the circumstances being what they are, this is just how things turned out". Reasonably, she didn't have to stick around after they ran from Dahngrest, but here she gives a quick "reason".
The dub changed this to "I'll bet he is". They were just told he's the current magistrate in Heliord, and all Yuri says here expresses he's letting it sink in and realizing exactly why all this is happening here. It's not a huge story beat or anything that gets changed, but it's an example of changing things that don't need to be changed as if trying to play things up in a way that... doesn't feel necessary to me? In this case the situation is kind of dawning on Yuri as he realizes how bad this situation could be/why it's like it is, but in the dub it comes across as more just unimpressed and "of course he'd do that".
An unfortunate, classic moment of them changing how much Yuri believes in and trusts Flynn. They changed this to "gotta run, Flynn!" and he just... leaves. I'm sorry but in what universe does "leave the rest to you" equal "gotta run"???
This one is one of those cases where the localization text was super awkward and wonky, and worse, they actually voiced it that way (like "we have guild's job to deal with". Yes, they actually voiced it that way too on top of everything else grammatically wonky with the entire conversation that they didn't bother fixing when the DE came out).
Also here, they changed what Yuri says about Cumore and Flynn. "I don't know how I could explain this to Flynn" doesn't, at least to me, carry the same weight as Yuri actually feeling ashamed (in the dub he says "what a shame", but does not express shame, versus him saying "how pathetic" and expressing shame in feeling pathetic) and saying he can't even face Flynn because Cumore got away. The thing is, Yuri does tend to posture, so when he fails at something, it hits him pretty hard.
And let's be honest, this just hits way harder than "he will get what he deserves".
Interestingly, Yuri could also fall into the category of viewing himself as sinful later on, which I talk about in my favorites post and the usage of "crime" and "sin" within the JP context.
Not particularly important, but just another (more mild) case and example of how the dub just randomly changed tone/mood/wording for no reason.
Another case of Yuri being more aggressive in the dub than he actually was. Here, all he says is just a plain statement. In the dub, he has an attitude about it and says it in a tone that's more insulting that Ioder didn't know about Heracles.
This isn't the only case of dub Yuri acting aggressively toward Ioder when he wasn't supposed to be and we'll get to that, but Ioder is another similar case of the dub making Yuri unnecessarily vocally rude (despite that Ioder is very polite toward Yuri).
(I left out the subtitles because all they did was copy the dub's localization, which kinda defeats the point of this post LOL. This will be the case going forward for any same circumstances.)
This one's a more interesting tidbit to me and less of a harmful change (i.e. I find that a lot of if not most changes relative to Flynn do more harm than good when compared with the original context). Basically it's saying "sweet mask and sharp eyes", implying Flynn's sweet face is a mask and saying it contrasts with his sharp eyes. I could get into a whole rant about why I love that in relation to some side material, but even in the game itself, there's the knight Flynn with his sweet, polite side and his real side that only shows when he's around Yuri (basically, who Flynn has to be for his job and who he actually is as a person, which he only gets to be around someone who knows the real him).
I'd guess this got changed in the dub because they weren't sure how to word it, though there's no mention of "heartthrob" here at all and instead actually says "sweet mask" as if, again, to say his sweetness is just a mask. It's actually a very interestingly accurate representation of his character - how he tends to not be himself when he's being "knight Flynn", and how that sweet face is contrasted by the look in his eyes (which they say, you know, eyes are the windows to the soul, so this would imply the sweet face is the mask and the eyes are the real Flynn. And of course, this Flynn is implied to show himself in his sparring with Yuri in Aurnion, where sword fighting is the best way to express himself. This isn't to say Flynn being a nice person in and of itself is a lie, but that his overly polite, respectful, kind knight side is a sweet mask contrasted to the man who loves to fight and has a sharp look in his eyes)
For now, we'll be back at Mantaic in the next post (due to image per post limit).
#Tales of Vesperia#GTF JP Vesperia Things#GTF Vesperia Localization Woes#really like... a lot of the time? the other characters weren't changed all that much#it's primarily Yuri who got this weird shift where they just... flattened his personality?#but some of the biggest offenders ended up being some of the most important scenes in the game which is what bothers me#and sometimes the localization is pretty much just... on point with the plot dialogue and other characters#yet for some reason they just... changed a lot of tone for Yuri?#it's just like... Yuri will have personality in his tone and they instead make dub Yuri speak it in a flat way in those moments#this did happen with the original dubbing quite a bit but it's also just SUPER noticeable with the new lines#my suggestion would be to at least play the game w/ JP dialogue and see how you feel coming out of it if you're a fan of Yuri and/or Flynn#and if you like it enough then I'd suggest watching the playthrough in JP that these screenshots came from if you're RLY dedicated lol#it's not JUST Yuri it's just /dominantly/ Yuri. other odd lines just didn't... go as hard?#like Raven and Karol especially go pretty hard on their lines in JP and the Schwann stuff with Karol was OOF#or if you'd rather just skip to watching it in JP I mean be my guest lol I just know some ppl might rather PLAY it#I just feel like... like... even tho not everything in the dub is horrendous... if you're a YURI fan?#it's hard to go back to the dub (impossible for me ngl) when you have this actual silly little guy#who is a lot more emotional and wholesome and Yuri isn't acting like he has a stick up his dubbed ass in some scenes#I still prefer the 360 version plot-wise for the most part and it's a mixed bag there a bit but#I can't get JP audio on the 360 so. it's the struggle ig.#in my case though it's this feeling of like... them wanting to create an image onto Yuri that wasn't supposed to be there?#obviously I don't know what went on in the loc room but I do know I walked out looking at dub Yuri like#him and the original Yuri aren't even the same. I get so frustrated with dub Yuri's unnecessary ATTITUDE sometimes#which wasn't ever a problem for me period in JP. he's emotional and sincere WAY more often#also lbh I cannot reasonably picture dub Yuri all dressed up and pretty the way he is in official artwork LOL#and that's the thing. I see them so differently it's like they're different people#I also just feel like the dub was like. he doesn't fit OUR vision for him. what WE want him to be like#and again I don't know what went on in that loc room but I DO know that's how I came out feeling from this game#anyway this is in hope more ppl will come to love JP Yuri's personality and stuff#but yeah more next time on ''why did you do this to my sweet baby boy''
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noticing a mutual has been inactive for a month and then awkwardly hovering over the DM button unsure if u should msg them to check in on them or not
#esp bc maybe they won't even see it if theyre logged out of tumblr entirely ;-;#i'm just hoping theyre okay oughhh#i might send a dm but i'm always so scared of DMing ppl fdsjkl i always feel like im going to say smth weird or wrong#or i'll talk someones ear off bc i overexplain things constantly 😭😭 plus i just feel like im intruding if i DM ppl fdsjkl#which is probably silly but !!! at some point i became terrified of interacting w others and idk why LOL i'm not sure what happened#ANYWAYS. THIS ISNT ABOUT ME FDJKL i just. man. stares at their blog. please come back or at least please be okay dear mutual 😭#dandy.cmd
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why everything gotta cost money
#i rly want to move into a 1br when my lease ends in september 2025 just to have a little more space#but it is becoming increasingly apparent to me that if the plan is to own a home sometime in the next 4 years#i really need to cut my spending#and the financially smart thing for me to do would be to stay in my current place with my current insanely low rent for as long as i can#rather than move into a unit with higher rent (not to mention all the costs that moving incurs outside of just a change in rent)#bleh#i should probably set aside some time this summer to reassess my storage situation/figure out what i can get rid of#so i can continue to stretch the livability of this place out for a little longer lol#the great sadness#i also really gotta like. stop buying anime plastic for a bit lol.#she says as if she's not going to otakon in like a month#here's hoping that the alleged pay equity audit that our new hr person is allegedly going to conduct at some point#results in a little salary bump#bc i was chatting w some of my colleagues at the bar on wednesday and well let's just say#there is some disparity bw the salaries of ppl at the same tier lol#one of the other managers is making 10k more than me#and was making more than one of the directors until said director found out and negotiated up#anyway
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another day another "applying the concept 'disposability' to 'someone withdraws from a personal relationship, & that wasn't signed off on by the other'" kill me
#literal acknowledged interpersonal abuse Needing to be ''mediated'' (implicit premise of preserving that relationship >>>)#and if the victim doesn't participate they're treating their abusive partner / abusive relationship as ''disposable''#like in what meaningful way. getting away from an abuser is ''disposing'' of them like imprisonment / killing From A State?#dropping an abusive relationship is ''disposing'' of it? like uh yeah i sure hope it is#this is always Vaguely Applied to ''ppl don't want to HANDLE CONFLICTS or DO THE WORK'' & then connected to political actions#like well someone's just a bad person In The World / All Things if they stopped being my friend and i don't know why#like of course that Can Be good faith. it's a personal business#but if someone ghosts you and you truly don't know why Yeah maybe there's something going on but like okay let them go#if they want to do that for reasons you don't think are Compelling or they just aren't interested / putting in that Effort then like#what Friendship is really being lost here. but then tweet about it with no context & a zillion ppl like SO TRUE kys randos#[fart reverb Conflict Is Not Abuse] standard abuse apologetics which are easy & a zillion ppl go SO TRUE b/c It's Abuse Culture#someone HAS to Answer My Texts / Calls / In Person Confrontations As A Bold Clearsighted Political Actor are you kidding#someone really doesn't. even if you Really are like ''and i'm not even consciously malicious'' what a high bar#one gazillion abusive parents will tell you And My Estranged Child Won't Even Tell Me Why / Doesn't Have Any Good Reasons / Won't Talk....#what am i supposed to doooo i'm at a losssss And Really I'm The Victim#''i want to break up'' / ''okay i don't :) let's talk through Your Feelings :) [waffle around until insisting on Same Access To Person]''#someone can rescind interpersonal access to themself For Any / No Reason. on a dime no explanation necessary. for god's sake#and friendship is not actually some magically pure & Neutral relationship either. same things#anyway just unfollowed some rando for their thread spinning off a vague qrt ''ppl are so AFRAID OF CONFRONTATION they unfriend u''#going on & on abt how You Need To Put In The Work & Effort & You're Just Probably A Bad Person Otherwise & Disposability like#the disposability is my three points wastebasket toss. death via the state =/= someone won't talk to you. can we be at all serious#every day i reach out further like aplatonic people [some emblem gesture] lovelessness [same] help me#thinking of a Good Tweet i saw abt framing everything re: interactions with others around Consideration first & foremost#wildly enough the way you treat people doesn't need to have Fundamental Assumptions re: like ah Friendship / Community / Love / Family &ccc#how do you treat a stranger. how do you treat someone who you don't personally like &/or vice versa. how do you treat ppl you don't Meet.#it's all so vague it could mean Anything but a) often hints towards [abuse victims are framed as Bad Political Actors]#& b) then that's what people read into & respond to for sure lol#as ever ''oh everyone's just little bitches who can't handle any discomfort. yes; this was prompted by my being discomfited''#wait yeah lol i did not Confront this stranger to try to Posit this to them in twttr's character limit; just unfollowed. disposability smh
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love being 25 and not knowing how to socialize bc i’m autistic and off putting and cringe so no one wanted to talk to me/wanted to be my friend growing up so now i’m an adult with very few friends or ppl i talk to on a regular basis bc i never learned how to socialize or text properly bc no one taught me how
#abc shut it#vent#i’m so lonely it’s not even funny#my talking to myself has just gotten worse in the past few months alone#i just want some friends i can do watch parties with and play games with damn it#i’m so bored and lonely all the time#my life has just been work sleep and chores and it’s driving me insane bc i have nothing breaking up the routine#like it doesn’t help no one texted me bc i was poor and had didn’t get a smart phone until is was basically too late :)#like i know part of it is the depression but#idk i just don’t do anything when i get home#sometimes i do art sometimes i game but usually i just lose track of time staring at tumblr and the next thing i know my few hours—#after work are gone and i have to go to bed#like don’t get my wrong i LOVE my coworkers but i need some more friends within my own age bracket#like is it to much to ask for a group of friends that will watch anime and movies with me in our own discord server#like is that literally to much to fucking ask of the universe can i be allowed to feel like an actual normal human being that’s connected#to the human experience for once in my fuckkng life#and not feel like some sort out outlier that doesn’t fucking exist to anyone#i’m to a point where i think and feel like i’m not even real! lol#like idk i would just like there to not to be days where i literally don’t communicate with anyone#and know what to say when ppl DO text me bc when ppl do text me i half the time don’t even know what to say#and forget the message is there and get to scared to reply after too much time has passed like#i know it’s a me problem that therapy would help but im terrified that it won’t#that i’ll just be going therapy and still be a lonely autisic looser who doesn’t know how to communicate without being off putting#or being too much
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I just read a whole wacky thread of people arguing which parent was bad Garmadon or Misako and I’m no longer scared of the Misako defenders
#shoutout to the one person who was going on about how garmadon was bad for LETTING LLOYD GET DRAFTED??? HUH???#they had a whole bunch of essays about that and everyone just had to ignore it cuz wtf were they on about#their argument kind of just turned into Everyone Is Bad Cuz They Let Lloyd Be A Ninja#and like. sure? but that’s just (LIKE THEY LITERALLY SAID) bc of the writers not realizing the implications. so it’s irrelevant#cuz it applies to EVERYONE man so WHY ARE WE DISCUSSING THIS. also why point to GARMADON do u think he WANTED LLOYD TO BE THE GREEN NINJA#WAS THAT NOT LIKE. HIS ENTIRE GOAL. TO MAKE HIM NOT THE GREEN NINJA. applies to Misako too actually#my point is it was SO IRRELEVANT LOL#oh yeah but um the actual post. uh. yeah the ppl defending Misako were literally making stuff up and refusing to fact check#like listen I hella respect if you want to make ur little headcanons that justify her actions a bit more but you CANNOT be treating them as#fact like you literally made that up 😭#it wouldn’t be as bad if they weren’t also making stuff up to make Garmadon look WORSE. like wtf. they were straight up contradicting canon#to say that Garmadon didn’t care or whatever and never even tried to be there for Lloyd LIIIKE#honestly my biggest damning reason I don’t like Misako is honestly the fact that we meet her GIVING A TOUR. THAT IS NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN#UR SON. like sure research prophecy or whatever SHE CLEARLY IS DONE WITH THAT AND IS JUST CHILLIN AT THE MUSEUM LIKE WHATTT#it’s like ‘oh she’s on break’ or ‘oh she’s just earning some money yknow ppl need that’ BUT LIKE. UR TELLING ME SHE HAS FREE TIME OUTSIDE OF#RESEARCH AND SHE CANT SPEND EVEN A MINUTE TO REACH OUT TO HER SON????#a lot of the arguments I saw acted like she couldn’t spare a single moment for Lloyd otherwise it gets in the way of her research when#CLEARLY SHE CAN. bro was CASUALLY STROLLING ALONG THE MUSEUM and just goes ‘oh hey abandoned son’ LIKEEE#Misako could’ve been a better character if the writers like. thought about things a LITTLE MORE. and gave her some depth.#and YOU CAN HEADCANON AS MUCH DEPTH AS YOU WANT ONTO HER. THATS COOL. BUT ITS NOT REAL.#I just think Misako defenders should be less ‘free my girl she did none of that’ and more ‘free my girl she did all that but the writers#didn’t know what they were doing’#like Misako has great potential but they fumbled. rip.
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Hey guys. gay rights
#i already made the sonic one a while bc yknow. kinnie stuff youve all seen my blog theme#but then i was wearing my Fearless Year of Shadow(tm) shirt along with it and my irl bff was like.#'why are you wearing a sonic bracelet with that shirt if you love shadow so much 🤨' *#(he doesnt know much about sth stuff but ive infodumped abt shadow and his backstory to him many times)#and i was like 😭😭 BECAUSE I DONT HAVW A SHADOW KANDI BUT I WANNA MAKE ONE. I WILL SOON#so. now i do!! taking my ad/derall on the weekends always make me want to make more kandi. its great!#and yknow what else it makes me want to do...... talk more on here >:3333#me and my dad are gonna go to a local jazz festival this afternoon bc our jazz combo is playing at it!!#itll be fun. my dad said hes gonna get some food from this really good breakfast place on the way thwre#which is not the best part. the best part is outside the shop there is a wonderful kitty cat who hangs around the parking lot#bc hes owned by the ppl who own the bar right next door#its so great. everybody knows him (the cat) and loves him. the v/ape shop next door has a tip door set up for him even though the#bar owner ppl take care of him and take him to the vet nd stuff. my dad found a faceb/ook page somebody made for him#and apparently it just has pictures of ppl at the bar holding him. its so great and hilarious. this cat is so loved#by the v/ape shop people. by random people at this beachtown bar. by the breakfast shop people.#anyways uh. this post was abkut kandi wasnt it 😭😭😭 lol#cherry chortles#anyways the add/er/all also usually makes me want to look at and sort through my pkmn card collection. so imma do that#because my dads friend (and my friend too i guess! me and him exchange cat photos bc he has this adorable chunky cat named gremlin) that we#play bar trivia with on tuesdays (dw its not really even a bar. its mostly a restaurant) asked me abt my pokemon card collection#bc the final question was to put a few franchises (it was like. dora the ecplora and spide/rman etc. and pokemon) in order of revenue#and obvs pokemon was the top. bc of factors like the trading cards so thats how that came up#we didnt bet any of our points btw but we almost! got it right! the order was pk/mn dora spidamen friends (the tv seies) but we had spidman#as second. but we still won!! our team is on a two game winning streak!!! we always split the money so next week ill get another 8 dolla >:3#wow i havent hit tag limit yert#lol. yall'll open the 'see all tags' thing and boom. do you love the color of the sky type shit 😭😭😭#sorry that sounds too much like aave. i (white baby) cant be sayin that#cherrys kandi#okay well i had a tag with a verse from the ultimarw showdown bc i didnt know what else to say#but with my kandi tag and these two tags i have hit tag limit. thank you folks ill be here all night
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...
#so i survived my 1st week as a phd student. it's interesting. im not sure how i feel#the negatives are that i forgot how much stress being around people causes me. as a research assistant i was able to be on my own schedule#and go into the lab at odd hours so i never had to see anyone. but now im in classes and teaching and have a shared office#classes are tolerable stress wise so long as im sitting on an edge. i only feel a lil like im dying. teaching makes nauseous beforehand.#which is odd bc im not really worried while im doing it or before im doing it. i thibk its just that i have to interact ans i kno im a#mediocre teacher bc id rather die than do the back and forth of asking questions and u should teach interactively#i like to break down complex idea and help people with problems but i was not build to teach in classrooms. i get knocked off points when#i give class presentations bc i cant make eye contact lol. so that'll b annoying this semester. and its just so hard to function in an#office space. idk its weird like i dont even feel it that much while im there its just like a flashing *i need to leave* alarm. and then#when im alone its like a physical weight off of me. and i cant tell if thats what's draining my energy or if ive just cycled into a low#energy lul bc im just like. i wanna sleep. and for me thats always a sign that somethings wrong. i dont feel that bad mood wise but its#like there's a rock weighing me down as im trying to tread water. so those r the big negatives. the positives r that#i do enjoy being back in school. i love the structure of it. but im also self destructive abt structure so well see how it goes. but my#lab mates seem nice as does my advisor. i feel a bit bad bc ill have to learn genome stuff from the ground up. and today i was trying to#convey ideas to him like an insane person. bc i dont have enough background to talk fluidly abt my prospective project and i have a picture#of what i mean but not all the details. hopefully i made some sense. i think the idea is cool. and thats the other really positive thing.#the papers i have to read associated with this project r waaaaaaaaaay more interesting than anything i ever had to read for my masters. like#they're the types of papers i would force other ppl to read for lab meetings. so im optimistic abt not hating it by the end haha#yay for being excited abt science. but i guess thats the other thing i feel bad abt. like im interested but haven't read a lot to prep bc#i cant express how difficult dyslexia makes things but also i cant control how interested in things i get so i bassically banned myself#from reading papers im actually interested in like 3 years ago bc in retrospect i was prob going thru a hypomanic episode#and i was like reading papers abt microbes in Antarctica all day and not working on my stuff. and i just remember walking into the lab at#like 5am to trasfer alage with tears streaming down my face bc i was just like. i cant have this nice thing and b functional. it has to stop#so i just created this weird barrier in my mind where im not allowed to read fun papers. so its odd to b reading them now for work. its odd#also i was walking to my office worring abt things and then i saw some moss growinf around the edge of the sidewalk and it made me wanna cry#bc i am an extremely normal individual. i have normal feelings abt photosynthesis. but anyway yeah. its been interesting#hopefully ill stay optimistic. next week we have a orientation for new grad students. and i might have to drive like an hr away. hate that#the driving i mean. not the orientation. that should b fun#unrelated
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why is everyone so negative and mean all the time. what happened to the love in your hearts
#idk. its just frustrating to me how i feel like i constantly see people shitting on stuff#rather than talking about stuff they actually like. like thats just not how i function#if i watch something thats like kinda mid i'll almost always focus on the things i liked#like its not a toxic posivity thing i think people should be allowed to talk about things they dont like#but idk. i just dont think like that#like for example sonic prime. did i think it was good? no lol#but i dont waste my time trashing on it?? i commented on what i liked as i watched it#and then i just kind of ignore it now lol. thats how i tend to work lol#and im def not gonna shit on someone ELSE for. liking something???#like unless its super problematic or something and even then i probably wont rlly care#ill just ignore or block those ppl. idk it just seems. needlessly mean#like what is the point of me going lol that thing some ppl like is stupid and bad#thats like just being an asshole for no reason 😭😭 idk idk its just something i see a lot#serena.txt#this isnt targeted to anyone btw just something ive been thinking about recently
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vaguing
#sth really lazy and almost insulting about 'you ship 2 guys bc you hate women'#esp when the woman in question straight up murders one of the 2 characters i enjoy writing lol#and esp also when im not allowed to write said woman as anything other than a perfectly matronly receptacle for male sadness#or else that is also somehow misogyny#am i allowed to like women enough to make them interesting characters rather than the mommy the gamer bros never got#am i allowed to puke up my own trauma and neuroses through male characters so as to not see them inflicted on a woman ie me#so that i can see those things at a safe distance so that they become cathartic rather than another depressing rumination#what if you just said you dont like something instead of trying to make everything a value judgment about a persons moral integrity#what if ppl write the things they do for their own personal reasons and not bc they hate some marginalized group#i dont even hate fia but im not going to write her as anything other than cunning and manipulative and driven#every character in this game is some flavor of fucked up#and almost none of them have pure intentions#thats uh kind of the point in some ways#meh
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bleh
#having a bad morning tbhhhh#i envy the ppl who grew up here :| it's so much easier to make friends when u went to school w ppl and grew up with them#i have been here since 2016 and was just trying to get stability the first 3 years financially/housing-wise.#and when i was Finally ready to start making friends the pandemic happened.#the closest thing I've had to friends were made thru my ex and when we broke up they ghosted me.#to this day i have not made a single genuine friend and i can't articulate how hurtful that is to think about.#and i get excited when i might have a new friend but do the audhd balancing act where i tone myself down so i don't scare them away#but then idk. maybe i just come off as uninteresting or indifferent. idk what the perception of me is bc no one ever tells me anything lol.#i just get ghosted a lot 😭 it's Literally so much easier to find ppl to fuck than it is to find friends. idk why this is so hard but it's#frustrating. everyone has lukewarm interest in me at best and i have so much to offer when I've opened up to someone.#and i can't rly talk w ppl about how I'm feeling. and i can't do anything but keep trying over and over or else i WILL fr have no friends.#it's just. like. I'm not a normal person w normal circumstances and interacting w people who already have a ton of friends and stuff#going on is hard. there's like this burning desire for companionship in u as the person NEEDING it that no one else has#bc they already have it yk? ur just kind of a footnote on everyone's day/week. u don't have that kind of relationship where#u can Just Go Over or just have ppl over. ppl can hang like once a month maybe. i hate it here but also don't want to leave :|#everything is great except trying to make friends. idk i just wanted to vent lol I'm done ranting and might just delete#but this feeling wells up inside me and some days is so hard to ignore 😭#'i have been here since 2016 and don't have a single genuine Friend' what the fuck 😭😭#ik that wfh doesn't Help but i wouldn't be able to get anything done in person in my position lol. plus it's less about where ppl are#and more about how relationships (dont) develop past a certain point.#i have someone I've been talking with probs longest out of everyone so far and we're gonna hang this weekend#but I'm also perpetually afraid I'm gonna scare them away or something and be back at square 1 😭#and idk im afraid that might translate into seeming shy or something and I'd hate for them to lose interest anyways ._.#but idk how much of that is valid vs my brain just being mean to me and paranoid over my other experiences.#anyways... yea thnx for reading if u did. i feel crazy 😮💨
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