#like truly who cares idk maybe i just cant understand it but its just so stupid to me.

[dolokhoded]

maybe i'm just greek but it's so weird to me when people get so upset over the ACCENTS in shows being transferred from broadway to the west end or to australia changing like ???? literally who fucking cares it's the same music and the same words these are just people's accents people have different accents in real life outside of having to fake them for theatre sorry <3

[nomairuins]

also i admire dws refusal ever to engage with language barriers

[bisexualfagdyke]

I've seen people say jerejean is boring (usually in comparison to kevjean, other Jean ships, andreil, etc.) and like, I get why ppl would say that I cant even lie (as a huge jerejean shipper) but I think its "boring" bcuz Jeremy is so fucking normal compared to the foxes or the ravens. He is literally so normal. He is just a guy. And yeah, him not being involved or even knowing abt the mafia abuse torture shit might be "boring" cuz it's a big contrast to andreil, and kevjean, but I think maybe Jean deserves a little normal guy idk! A normal life! A normal life would suit him well.

Neil's circumstances are perfect, he didn't need a normal life, but just one away from the threat of his father. Him and Andrew have a unique mutual understanding of each other, and trust, that nobody else quite gets. Kevin has Wymack, Andrew & Neil, and a whole dysfunctional team that care for him and understand exactly what he went through. Jean genuinely has nothing and he is so, so insanely broken and traumatised. In my opinion, I don't think him being in a relationship with Kevin, or anyone with connections to the Moriyama's, would be that good for him, bcuz of the trauma and associations. I do also think Kevin leaving irreparably shattered something. More than anything, I think Jean needs kindness and gentleness. You can see it in how he gravitates towards Renee, gravitated towards Kevin because he was the only one who showed him kindness in the nest.

I really think the normality, kindness, and upbeat-ness of the Trojans is good for him. People like Jeremy, Laila, & Cat are good for him. I think they're the best for him. I think he would thrive in a normal ass life, truly. He like cooking, he likes open roads, he likes cool evening breezes. Give him normal, calm, kind happiness. And I think Jeremy not having any ties to Jean's trauma is good for Jean. Jean himself doesn't fully understand what he went through, I don't think he needs Jeremy to fully understand/relate, either, he just needs unending love and support and patience and kindness... and Jeremy is the perfect individual to give that to him. Jeremy also isn't overly Exy-obsessed, which I think is another thing Jean could benefit from. Jeremy has never had a life anywhere near the one that Jean had in the nest, and Jeremy can teach Jean all the normal, simply things in life. Can teach him how to be free, how to be his own person outside of the Raven's and Exy and trauma.

TLDR: I think jerejean being "boring" is actually quite good, because Jean deserves a normal, simple, "boring" life after everything he has gone through :P

[yanderehsr]

Hii! How r u? How was ur dai? About the oc thing...Could I prety please with cherry on top get a platonic platonic Furina, Ei, Nahidaand Venti with a reader that is like a elf? Idk, how to explain it, so I am gonna add a picture to how I wiev it:

Her name is Eclipsa and has white hair and pointy ears(ofc since she is an elf). And I dont mean like Santa's elfs, I mean the ones from greek and romanian mytology.

About the bakstory: Lets just say that she is the daughter of The Heavenly Principels(lets just call her THP bc I am lazy) (ik it sounds cringe but hear me out😭) and since THP was not all the lovey dovey tipe and probably VERY bad with children (maybe even hate them idk, I really cant see her motherly) she just decided to throe her to Tyvat into the care of the archons untill she was old enough (16 years old) to come to Celestia (bacically be mature since she doesnt want a cryng baby around). Eclipsa is growing, just like Klee slower (there is a theorh that says that Klee is 80 but is also 8 bc she is growing 10 times slower than normal) and everu 100 it adds 1 year rlto her age. Now, lets say that when she was 10(1000) she overheared somebody say that the archons dont actually like her (like parental figures ofc) and that they probably just cang get rid of her. She actually belivd them like a dumb child that she is and ran away (opened a portal to another world and dissapeared without anybody's knoladge). Now, lets just say for the sake of this au to make it more interesting (maybe more cringe but I am having fun ok?😭) that the disaster from Khaenri'ah happened bc the person occ heared it was a khaenriah'n and THP since finding this out was like "OH HELL NAHH" and this iz the reason they destroyd Khaenria'h. THP gave the archons untill Eclipsa was to turn 16 to find her. Well, now, at 15, she randomply (and awkwardly) came back. (Maybe she finally got into her head the ideea of checking Irmansole to see if the archons truly hated her and surprise surprise, ints not true). Now, imagine the characters meeting Occ in their nation. For Venti- at windrise, for Ei in the city (near the statue), for Nahida just at the spirit tree (maybe one of her little friends passed that message for her) and for Furina(back when she was still an archon) she was told from Neuvillette that he sensed Occ's presence(lets just say that higher ups are aware of Eclipsa's existance, including Furina. Perhaps she has read about Oc in one of the books she read to find a solution to Fontaine's profecy).

Also, I imagine ooc to look like this when she was little(I just love this fanart sm😭):

(One thing to note is that none of theres fanarts are mine, and idk who they are from to credit them. Also te line I made was bc there was some writting on that picture and I didnt want it to be out of the context:>)

About personalit I see her as somebody who is quite the drama queen and loves attention 24/7. She loves pulling pranks all the time and also like annoyng people, but in a joking way. Hoever I see her as somebody who has her moments of understanding and is quite the menance to societity(pretty mhch like how Klee is). About her powers, she is developing since young THP's powers but since she is not even 18, its definetly not as affective.

Anyways, I know it might be a weird request or cringe, and maybe I wrote too much, or gave too little information. Also, I am VERY sorry if you cant undrtstand this request, english is not my first language and I pretty much have dyslexia(not bad one tough, I am still working on correcting mynself :D) and I tried to make sure I made as little mistakes as posible but its hard to spot them when its a big paragraphe, uk? therfor you are always free to ignore thiz request, hopw you have a nice day and good luck writting so many requests. Also, congrats on 1k followrs!! :D

...Did I just read an entire fanfiction XD, I will gladly write this, and thanks for the congrats😆

Hope you'll enjoy😄

Trigger Warning: Yandere, Obsessive behaviour, Possessive behaviour, Kidnapping

Furina: She knows almost nothing about her, Neuvillette doesn't seem to remember anything about her and there are no books about it, hell the only reason she knows about Eclipsa is because Focalors thought of it as important that she knew about The Heavenly Principles daughter if she was going to act as an archon.

Furina's first meeting with Eclipsa is when Neuvillette is showing her around, it was instant love... not the romantic kind, the platonic kind, Eclipsa looked like a doll, so perfect to dress up, so perfect to have around, Furina feels lonely and Eclipsa makes her feel whole again, so she takes what she wants.

Furina dislikes The Heavenly Principles, she would be happy if she was hated by them, her performance is over either way, the profecy is fullfilled, is it really so wrong of her to be selfish... you will see Furina run around Fontaine with Eclipse causing havoc, as long as she is with her she doesn't feel lonely, and now she never will

"Y-you aren't leaving me right, right... ANSWER ME PLEASE... I'm sorry for yelling, I just don't wanna lose a friend so dear, you can understand, right?"

Raiden Ei: The day Eclipsa dissapeared was the day her sister died... not only did she lose her very own sister, she also lost someone she practically viewed as a daughter, she had never felt such horrible pain before, so she shut herself away as to not feel it again.

So many years spent in isolation, all Ei could think about was her sister and Eclipsa, she swore if she could just get them back, she would protect them both with her life, she just wants things to go back to normal, like it used to be.

So many years had passed that Ei nearly didn't recognize Eclipsa, she had so many questions for her, but she didn't say a single one... screw The heavenly Principles, she was going to protect her as best she could, Eclipsa don't even get a chance to talk before she was shut inside the plane of Euthymia.

"So long, you have been away for 500 long years... but that's okay, you're here now, I'll make sure you not come to harm like what happened to Makoto"

Nahida: She doesn't have much knowledge of Eclipsa, she isn't recorded in the Irminsul, all the knowledge Nahida has of her is what her predecessor left for her she didn't forget, she is confused why Eclipsa isn't around... did she dissapear or worse, did she die?

Nahida is confussed when she feels Eclipsa's precence by the Irminsul, it feels familiar but she can't figure out why, of course like the curious 500 year old child she is, she went to figure out what caused such familiarity... Nahida knew who it was the second she laid eyes on her, this is who she is supposed to protect like the Greater Lord she once did.

Nahida asks a lot of questions, why is she here? Why was she gone? Eclipsa is now her favorite subject to learn about, Nahida takes up some kind of little sister role to stay close with her, she needs to know everything, feed her ever-growing curiosity, maybe one day she will introduce Eclipsa to the Wanderer... but that can be later, Nahida wants to be selfish for a bit longer.

"Curious, you being here fills me with a feeling like... like a hole, you fall down it everyday and it just feels so annoying, then suddenly someone has covered it up and I don't feel annoyance anymore... You need to stay with me for a bit longer, I need to figure out why"

Venti: He isn't all that interested in following The Heavenly Principles orders, but he still did as to not occur her wrath... he did not expect to take care of a child, he wasn't the best, he got constantly drunk, never took anything serious, except for protecting Eclipsa from any danger.

It was no surprise that Venti felt such fear and despair when Eclipsa dissapeared, he had lost yet another loved one... why does he still care, it always happens anyways, no relation lasts forever, no matter how much he tries to drown the memory of her in even more alcohol, it doesn't work

That's when Venti notices her precence, after 500 long painful years, is she finally back? Is this his second chance. He meets Eclipsa at windrise, she look just as well as when she dissapeared... He doesn't care what The Heavenly Principles thinks or wants, he will keep Ecilpsa safe and away from her, He will keep that smile on her no matter what.

"It sure has been a while hasn't it, soooo how have you been, hope you missed me for I have missed you"

[hellion-child]

i am starting to feel like they truly did want to leave bucktommy with an open "will they wont they" vibe and did not intend for bucktommy fans to be hit as hard as we have, but they just fully fucking fumbled on the delivery here lmao

(theres the problems w the delivery of the story itself of course, things weve talked to death by now lmao i wont get into it here)

i think we were meant to still have some hope (and we did!! we fucking did) but their decision to use journos who only care about bvddie baiting has given off the wrong tone, twisted things to suit their own agenda, and that (along w some things being said that were not well thought out) snuffed out what hope we had.

also, knowing lou was interviewed by a journo that openly dislikes him, his character, and his characters relationship. who later mocked him on her damn twitter. like w all the hate, he handled it w grace and gave a great interview, but it still fucking sucks that he had to.

i cant help but wonder, if these interviews had been conducted by actual decent journos, ppl who gave a shit about bucktommy or at the very fucking least werent actively wanting their break up— what would the vibe have been like then? would there be more care and compassion while discussing the breakup and some thought to how fans might feel? would bucktommy still feel so final?? would we find some encouragement to remain hopeful but not too hopeful? idk!

and of course, to top it all off, there is the every-present fucking barrage of hate and bullying from toxic bvddie fans, wherever u look. where we cant even engage w the shows social media without being attacked. and idk maybe there truly isnt a way to curb them, but regardless, its an awful environment where we get kicked and kicked while we're down. hell, theyre still going after lou!

anyway. i do feel like theyve laid the groundwork to have tommy return. for what, tim probs still doesnt know lmao maybe they will deliver on the pining, will-they-wont-they, a love like tarlos of it all. i do believe we may still see bucktommy back together.

but i no longer have faith that they will be careful w their portrayal of queer characters. i no longer trust them to deliver a story that is satisfying. i dont particularly feel respected as a viewer. and i just cant get myself to care, to become invested in this show only to risk disappointment again

i guess im just waiting to see what their response will be after the weekend. if they genuinely want to understand and care about why we are upset. if theyre gunna work to fix their fuck ups, or if they even consider them fuckups. time will tell huh

[fernwebs]

TF2 OC Infodump... About this silly guy

Minion's relationships with the mercs

Engineer - Engie is like one of the only people that can understand him (literally not emotionally) because of his thick ass accent. Minion likes to talk to him. Minion yaps to him a LOT, about almost everything.

Medic - Minion WILL find any way possible to be the one to deliver Medics orders personally. He also likes to include extra organs in almost every shipment. Minion makes his feelings towards Medic very obvious, but Medic continues to play dumb to keep getting those extra organs. Minions bird is the cause of at least 3 archimedes going missing.

Spy - Spy has photo evidence of Minion doing weird shit (staring at medics ass or smth idk). Minion is VERY aware of this and gets very nervous when hes doing anything at all because hes afraid that Spy is taking a picture of him.

Soldier -  Soldier is one of Minion's best friends, but Minion is scared that Soldier will grab him. Because he did, once. Minion got accused of not being faithful to America.

Sniper - Minion thinks he's weird because of the jarate thing. Hes scared that Sniper will throw jarate at him. Theyre probably buddies though, because they are both from places that have like weird animals, and they'd probably talk about that.

Scout - Theyre probably buddies because they both are falling for someone who barely likes them back. They encourage eachother. They're also relatively around the same age.

Demoman - Demoman is one of Minion's best friends along with Soldier. They'd also be drinking buddies, maybe not too often but they would. Minion gets really emotional when hes drunk, so he'd probably overshare to Demoman.

Heavy- I think theyre only acquaintances because they both cant quite understand each other (considering they both dont speak fluent english, and their native languages are different) BUT i think if they ever hung out they would cook for each other / bond over food.

Pyro - He probably hangs out a lot with Pyro because of Louise, he draws with Pyro when hanging out with them and Louise.

Bonus: Miss Pauling - I think he respects her a lot as a person and thinks she's cool. He probably tries to convince her just a little bit that scout is cool.

Louise - They are literally the father daughter duo EVER!! minion loves louise as a daughter so much and he cares so much he would take a bullet for her.

Eddy - Even though they might argue or have their differences sometimes, Eddy is always Minion's best friend. Minion truly appreciates Eddy and is grateful that Eddy is in his life.

Smissmass Presents

Spy - Lint, like he WRAPS IT to make it look like an extravagant cool gift but he actualy needle felted to lint to make it into a middle finger

Soldier - a tabo becuz he heard that soldier like bucket

Medic - he would buy him like 8 presents and make him custom advent calendar but its just pics of him and its the same picture each time for 12 days

Demoman - probably a nice bottle of wine or a case of his favorite alcohol

Scout - shitty art supplies because Scouf draws a lot, minion thinks those are the best art supplies in the world

Heavy - He would try to make a sandwich but with hawaiian rolls

Engineer - a book on how to learn tagalog

Pyro - 200 pack of jumbo crayons

Sniper - something very australian related

Bonus: Miss Pauling - A world globe you color in places for everywhere you've been.

Louise - Literally ANY toy besides a puzzle because he knows shes sick of if

Eddy - joke gifts like a mug or t-shirt that says something retarded, but if a real gift he'd buy something that was on eddys wishlist or something

on the bonus ones.. Louise and Eddy are my friend's OCs

@ilikesimsfour

thanks for reading chat!!

[queenunderthatmountain]

Literati endgame?

okay but i really didn't get why everyone hated the gilmore girls ending because for me it seems like a Jess and Rory endgame is actually quite possible (and likely).

Okay, so we know only that she's with Logan's baby.

But (sorry team Logan) it seems kinda clear that she's not gonna end up with him. First of all, I think her being lost and suddenly becoming pregnant on accident is an obvious parallel to Lorelei, so it makes sense to me she's gonna be a single mother for a while. Even more so, because Logan and Christopher are soo much alike. (yes Logan is much older and more mature then Christopher was at 16 but Chris was a shitty dad way longer).

And if you were able to look past Logans red flags in gilmore girls (sleeping with like 4 different people right after allegedly breaking up, looking down on people with less money, being a dick towards Jess for no reason) after AYITL I don't think anyone can deny that he's just not a great guy who cheats on his fiance with no remorse whatsoever. So yeah, I actually dont know if he would want to be in the kids and rorys life, but I just dont think it would work out either way.

So now to Jess.

Yes, you can have a different interpretation, but to me he just looked at Rory not only lovingly but with so much longing and even pain in his eyes that its obvious hes not over her and still in love.

Hes appeared when Rory was lost before, when she drOpped out if yAle and later, when she was without job or underwear. Jess had the idea with the book as well, so he kind of guided her towards a new path, I cant imagene him not taking part in the process of her book writing. She was so exited to show him the first three chapters, I think she would want to include him later as well, or maybe ask him for advice as a writer (maybe he'd be the publisher?).

So I definitely belive it's realistic for him to still be in her life, and maybe support her with her kid in some ways (like Luke?)

And now to Rory.

I do think it was right for her to move on after he left, but it always felt so incomplete to me, I was so sure they'd get back together a second time, sometime after him telling her he loves her. I truly believe they are soulmates, in the way that they understand each other better than anyone else, like the same things, have so much in common. Hes was very troubled and disturbed when they were dating, but he was the only boyfriend who really worked on himself (Logans not sleeping around doesnt count) and changed.

And while I am sure she did love Jess, it just doesnt feel right that she never said it back. Yes we got "might have loved you" but idk thats just not enough.

They were dating for such a short time compared to the others, did not even have sex (which could make a relationship appear more serious) yes they had this incredible connection, they still care so much about each other and immediately talk like they used to, even when they havent spoken in years.

So yeah, I think the timing was never right, at first Jess was too troubled, then Rory was in love with Logan, but I really do believe that not only did she always love him, i think a part of her was always IN love with him.

Now, that their lifestyles could sympathize I think she would see that, and no way he'd be like "yeah sorry too late". They needee their time, like Lorelei and Luke, but in the end I see them.

[onlyjaeyun]

hey zadiebaby just wanted to get ur input on smth (or maybe just get it out in the open idk) i personally find it really cute how all the characters care so unabashedly for y/n but can i just ask if it’s intentional in a sense that oh shes the main character so all the other characters revolve about her the most as well or is it because theyre all aware of her trauma / back story? i hope u understand what im trying to ask TT because i think irl its hard to find a friend group who does that and like genuinely means it bc most of the time the dynamic is very teasing focused (although caring when need be) and less of “oh my sweet baby i love you” kind of thing ? so to me its unrealistic like even the way the boys or tsuki treat her is pretty foreign, to be constantly doted on like that so do they all just truly see her as a mother figure who can do no wrong or something along those lines? IM NOT TRYING TO BE MEAN OR SARCASTIC BTW i hope it doesnt come off as that 😓😓

they deffo do see her as a mother/older sibling figure bc they all grew up together and have always stayed in thag dynamic! and i do get why the depiction of their dynamics is lowkey a little unrealistic and i guess that's mostly my self indulgence bc i just like to think of wnha thag way BUT i have to add that they indeed do tease each other and are actually a LOT more like siblings, and i personally think bc of the constant bamter between y/n and hoon it's a little difficult to see but y/n is the exact same with the older triplets the way riki and his set of twins treat each other. im gonna try and involve their actual dynamics a little more bc rn (i cant lie) i have opted for one on one priv chats bc ihs just easier with the editing for me but gcs will be back very soon!!! i hope this answers your question baby!🩷🩷

[goodfully]

a little delayed but i wrote most of this in my notes app waiting for internet access hahaha i finished reading the third book yesterday, mostly in the car, im in the middle of a trip with family and relatives so this might be more vague/disorganized. mm okay thoughts on "those who leave and those who stay"!

i mean all of this in a lighthearted way! but wow idk what i was expecting with nino, i was lowkey hoping he wouldnt be a major character in the third book. oh my god, i swear every time ninos name was revealed (the author of some article, somebodys friend, some babys father, etc..) i mentally rolled my eyes.. i get that hes an important character and its great how he encourages lenu with her academic work much more than pietro ever did, but wow, tbh ive had enough with this guy hahaha

okay! i think what i liked most about this book is that that while the first two books were centered on lenu and lila looking towards their future and escaping their neighborhood, the third book was so much of them both looking back on the past. by that i mean, both their own lives in that neighborhood in naples, as well as history and politics globally.

anyway im glad we got more political history in this book, it just makes sense to i think. lenu and lilas lives are very much affected by it, and always had been, but it becomes much more clear to them now that theyre older, altho ig in different ways. mm like understanding the connection between the violence in the neighborhood they grew up in and the systems of exploitation that exist globally (like imagine finding your first boyfriend is the leader of some fascist thugs that beat ppl up in front of the factory your friend works at). i think its important bc ever since the first book im sure that we've been hearing from both lenu and lila that they feel as tho something beyond their grasp and comprehension is keeping them from escaping from the lives they had/have. and like.. maybe theyve known it was the patriarchy, fascism... before they even knew what it was. ahh the stuff that lenu said in the beginning about how we cant really escape bc the world is poisoned everywhere. its a bleak view, but that part in the very beginning was ahhhhh...

oh god, lenu having daughters.. like.. more mother/daughter relationship things... the things girls learn from their mothers (dede and elsa in front of the mirror acting dissatisfied with the way they look.. i know it was a short, insignificant scene but i would have cried) and also. when lenus mother came to take care of her, and she said "i was afraid she would never return. but she always did"... ahh!!! and then when elena told her daughters about leaving their father and both of her daughters asked if she would take them or begged her to stay. screams. oh oh oh and every single time she notices that one the younger children resembles their father???

as much as i do adore lenu, i find myself attached to lila.. so when there was that big chunk of just purely lilas part of the story, i was excited (despite the very distressing events)... anyway thoughts on that lila part:

i was thinking about how much this part showed how revolutionary movements arent that straightforward, esp between the actual working class and the intellectual students, like when revolutionary movements arent led by the ones the revolution was made purposefully to liberate? ohh actually i have a lot of thoughts on this and the events that happened, i like how much ferrante talks about it, but ill keep it short.. the part with lilas speech in the pamphlet, the fight in front of the factory, pasquale and nadia disagreeing with lenu helping lila, local and state armed fascists, union organizers not truly representing the workers, its relation to the patriarchy etc..

also so heartbreaking, seeing lila lose her mind over her child, believing that the closer he is to her, the more likely he'll break.. like her. god god i understand that feeling, but i imagine its so much worse for lila when its her own child. that thing about feeling trapped in the same fate as your parents is just so so sad. ive literally never wanted to have my own children bc of this.

i know im projecting onto lila, but tbh the idea that lila is aroace is...!!! haha.. like when she was crying and telling enzo that she loves him and wishes every night to hold him close, but "beyond that i dont want anything." and hhfhrh idk i feel this way for a lot of ppl and know i risk being left if im unable to give what the other person in a relationship wants and they suffer for it. hh

oh! i think its cool that while the revolutionary/workers rights movement was a bigger thing for lila, the feminist movement was more significant for lenu.. god pietro was so??? idk why he was so insistent on following traditional husband/wife roles. i thought something was off about him since they first got engaged and he didnt care of her novel. tbh i am happy for her and hope she gets to be content with her self and her life in the next book. oh and the new thing that lenu writes is so interesting... i think maybe the women in the books would find it the truth for them, except probably lila. so it was interesting when alfonso tells lila that he wants to if he was a woman, hed want to be like lila.

oh some other random parts i keep thinking about: when she and lila were talking excitedly like when they were children, and the talk finally inspired something in her to write a second novel. and when lila read it, and cries. and they both say they dont know who they are without the other.. and when lenu starts rambling about how she believes lila has the intense capacity for apocalyptic violence like she did at the start of the second book, i go crazy i love that hahaha. hmm and gigliola... i remember not thinking much of her yet in the first two books, but really i like her and feel a lot for her.

mm there might be stuff i forgotten to mention, but ill end this here for now! i cant believe its only one book left already...

[kamaradka]

talking abt sex under the cut its not raunchy im just unpacking things semipublicly because the notes app wasnt cutting it

its definitely a situation where i struggle to separate my own actions which prolong the issue and the issue itself ...but truly i feel very affected by every "cherish that tgirl" "heres how to make a tgirl feel good in xyz ways" etc posts on account of how distant from my own desire i remain even after being out as trans for a decade and earnestly exploring my desire + having lots of gay sex for seven yrs... i so so so rarely feel like others' desire for my body extends beyond a certain "wow sashas hot i hope she does xyz to me"... even in trusted fwb situations or when hooking up with other trans women i will often hit mental roadblock after roadblock and stifle my own desires before i even understand what they are, only letting thru the ones that i can excuse as service acts for the other. so i end up pushing thru some of the most terrifying inhibitions within me if it is in the name of another's desire (namely topping despite lifetimes worth of anxiety and dysphoria and shame) but can barely lift a finger to even begin to unpack what i might want otherwise. how i might want to be treated.

and so it becomes a façade that people treat like its own person if we hook up nore than once.. oh sasha doesnt want xyz dont ask dont explore dont experiment. stay in the carefully marked safe areas and treat her consistently every time so as not to upset her. and especially dont allow her to merely receive because she immediately starts feeling guilty or scared and cant keep herself into it and will almost always ask u to stop as if shes letting u down ♡

idk maybe there r ways other ppl can express their attraction to me + be commanding and insistent w their desire for things that center my pleasure + help or force me past the miles of distance i feel from my own wants and needs . but i have yet to experience that even from v caring and loving friends and/or from other trannies who i thought might Get It. haha whatever

[konnoiseur]

I see from your previous post that you probably don’t have a very high opinion of Raven and Taiyang. Could I tease those thoughts out? Thoughts on Phoenix and what their pre-canon relationship could’ve looked like?

I ask because it’s my obsession right now, but by all means go to town if you’ve got something scathing to say.

oh man. tai and raven.

i mean okay let me just start point blank with i dont care about team strq. i truly do not care.

-summer up until v9 has had approximately No Importance to the story beyond tropey dead parent backstory. and now shes a liar who (unintentionally) framed ozpin, and favored her birth daughter over yang (at least in my eyes by virtue of leaving her emblem to ruby and nothing to yang)

-raven was never all that interesting to me back in the day beyond a cool design that seemed like a genderbent adam tbh and then when we did get to know her she was genuinely someone i wondered if the writers were TRYING to make her stupid on purpose. and NOW shes a massive fucking hypocrite who ALSO framed ozpin and she and summer heavily contributed to the reason the mains didnt trust ozpin which spiraled into them not trusting ironwood and well we saw where that went

-qrow was easily and obviously the best due to being the only one that actually mattered but theyve sanded off his flaws and uniqueness over time to where i kinda hope he gets killed off soon bc i cant stand to see him either get with robyn or get the shiro voltron treatment where he gets with some no name guy to appease fair game shippers.

-and tai... hes point blank a terrible parent, to where qrow "i was raised by bandits and have a bad luck semblance and crippling alcoholism" had to be the dad that stepped up. hes not a good teacher, he seemingly didnt give a shit about ruby, a teenager, trekking across the world with only other teenagers he didnt know despite knowing that a) his first lover was in mistral and kills huntsmen and b) his second lover was presumably killed for her silver eyes, the trait ruby shares, he apparently never talked with yang about her semblance despite being their teacher at signal and it took her maiming another student on live television and her nearly dying in a terrorist attack to actually talk to her? he sucks lol

like i know ppl want team strq backstory and while i would prefer that over the fucking justice league crossover, i simply do not care at this point

ALL THAT TO SAY. raven and tai and summers dynamic is Weird to me? like he moved on from raven So Fast and ravens motivations are so stupid i cant. she says "the tribe is our family" and then we see the 'tribe' and its literally like a gang of criminals that live in tents and steal and murder people. they never show us anything that makes me understand why raven would want to go back to them? even if theyre ""family"" theyre shitty??? idk

i would love to hear what YOUR feelings are though ! maybe you can illuminate something i cant see haha

[xx-lemon-drop-xx]

hi, i go by kaso (he/she). requesting for the twst and ror boys (with the exception of idia and leona)

im mostly on the neutral centerpoint when it comes to myself. im an introvert. im calm, mellow, down-to-earth. im also observant as i pick up small things n remember them when the time is right. also to js sniff out peoples intentions but its more of the first most of the time.

im a soft-spoken guy. usually im relaxed and unshaken, though my motivation seems to come on a whim ebery other day so i may seem out of it at times. its easy to keep my composure for most things and keep my emotions in check.  i have tendencies to be passive-aggressive when provoked and im kinda stubborn. but im chill and friendly.

its easy for me to pick up from setbacks. im naturally intelligent but i dont really study to keep it.. its not like i dont want because im quite self-aware its just the lack of motivation. im also quite clever when the time comes.. cant explain it but its kinda easy to play the cards right when its laid out in my favour.

i may have an avoidant attachment of the sort im not sure.

when it comes to humour, im genuinely such a corny person and its always a hit or miss for my jokes. its also tinged with satire and sarcasm most if not all the time. i love to laugh and will find anything funny that might come out of your mouth.

i enjoy indulging in my interests, listsning to music, drawing and other things. i dont really have set things i enjoy, i just do whatever makes me happy tbh. i love having fun but it drains me. id try everything once if i could js so i can mak the most of the moment. im quiet when i go abt this though.

i think my greatest fear is being unable to uphold to what ive created and not achieving my dreams.. im not so sure if it truly bothers me though. i experience small emotional highs and lows so maybe thats why.

i cant tolerate critical people who need to call you out for every flaw or people that cant keep their mouth shut. not chatty or talkative people im talking abt those who gossip. trust is a really big thing for me and its honestly a huge turn off.

i love with actions rather than words. i try and take my time with someone and treat them with the best care i can muster. im very passionate abt the things and people i love and i feel and care deeply even if i show it terribly. its in the little things. my love languages are quality time and parallel play.

im not sure if i have a type if im being honest.. never really thought hard on enough.. is not being an ass to other count?? like idk bare minimum wins i suppose.

I pair you with: Adam!

Calm and open-minded with a bit of a sarcastic kick to him, Adam finds your calm yet stubborn and sarcastic demeanor amusing in a friendly way. He is not very opinionated himself, even towards the gods as shown when he was only fighting for his children, though he respects your opinions nonetheless.

Adam prefers to sit under a tree with you, and tap through music on this device you've labeled as a "Phone" he'd never seen such a thing before though he was also more than interesting to him. Adam would likely eat grapes while listening to music and watching you draw, though I don't think he'd try it out himself.

He is quick to compliment you and finds your drawings interesting. He is chatty 50% of the time, though being more so favoring in quietness himself he understands that you are more introverted. Adam is likely to take you on walks around the forest to enjoy the scenery, and being around multiple animals he would likely teach you the correct way to feed some of them such as having a deer eat an apple out of your hand.

Adams most enjoyable thing about you would be your eyes. They're the window to the soul, or so he claims they are.

Character matchups found here

[manie-sans-delire-x]

I think you're decontextualizing too much and talking from a privileged point of view. I'm not arguing with the objectivity of what your point is, but it's a very bland flat hill to die on, in my opinion. People can totally agree to disagree, but the whole "good luck living this way" or "it's never gonna happen" is nothing but a shrugging off problems just because they don't belong to you.

Of course trans folks have deeper issues, we've been fighting in a society that, by default, does not accept us and we're forced to explain our very existence on a daily (or whoever cares to, to be honest I dropped that one ball there). So that's why it's important to make people who are coming from said privileged spots (mind, I'm not using the word "privileged" to hop on a high horse and offend anyone) understand how some things are very easy adjustments to make to accommodate minorities. And you don't really need to know/profoundly understand /why/ it's important for them, you can simply trust it is if they say so.

It's like saying "why would I use City money to build a stupid ramp when wheelchair users can struggle a little and learn to climb a 3 inches step" or "why would I stop staring at that person's ass if it's out and it's natural for me to look at it" because you want to be better and it's not that deep.

Yet again, agree to disagree if adding "assigned at birth" is such an inconvenience. No one is word obsessed, but personally speaking I'll bend the usage of my language as much as I can to make sure everyone around me is comfortable and feels safe, I don't care and need to know why.

How am I decontextualizing or talking from a privileged point of view? I mean I suppose I am in that I am not trans? I'll give you that.

Why is my point of view a bland hill to die on but insisting on changing female/male to afab/amab isnt?

No I just truly believe and came to the realistic conclusion it will never happen, not in any of our lifetimes at least. Do you really expect that this is going to become the new normal, in every country and culture? Seriously?

Yeah damn straight Im shrugging it off, I cant help people who are determined to be unhappy over word choice. Its not my problem, as you said. Everyone elses life will go on as normal, only they will be stuck on this and being unhappy, only hurting themselves.

Changing a language is not "very easy adjustment", not at all. I mean clearly, or else all this fighting wouldnt be happening right? And ok, say English changes. What, now every other language in the world has to change? Oh boy, thats going to lead to a lot of confusion and fighting. Sounds kinda problematic too, to insist other cultures and countries have to change their languages to match the more enlightened English. Colonist vibes.

Lets have realistically attainable goals. Lets focus on what really matters- like violent hate crimes against transpeople. People who are sooo passionate about political correctness and word choice should maybe, idk, do something real to help. Volunteer or work to help transpeople. But see they dont actually care about transpeople, they just get off on the self righteousness and false sense of moral superiority.

Its not about understanding why its important to them, I understand that it is. But unfortunately, reality doesnt give a shit about peoples emotions or whats important to them. (and clearly its not ok to disagree, because then you get labeled as a terf or whatever else new acronym...)

If you want to compare it to that, its more like if people in wheelchairs insisted that all stairs should be banned- ramps only- and you cant call them disabled anymore, everyone else is un-disabled. Society will never build itself around to a minority population, and shouldnt because it makes no sense.

Its not about "doing better" or peoples feelings. This is the main difference in thought process I think- some people view it as a moral social issue, some people view it as a issue of reality and logic.

What is a female? What is a male? A woman? A man? Whats the differences between them? Whats the difference between sex and gender? Are trans people actually transsexual or transgender? Is it even possible to be transsexual since you will never have the desired sex's gametes? Can someone be a female man or a male woman? At some point we need some god damn definitions. We cant just make words mean whatever we want them to.

Why not just have females, males, and transfemales and transmales?? Men, women, transmen, transwomen. That makes way more sense. Why would the majority and a whole ass language change to fit the minority? And even with the use of "cis", "trans" is still in use so attaching "cis" is pretty redundant either way!

[scarystinkyskeletons]

i think that i am finally completely losing hope in anything ever getting better.

idk how im supposed to feel safe anymore. who am i supposed to even fucking feel safe with? im tired of liberal men thinking theyre all "automatically safe" (theyre the most awful nefarious blood sucking vampires that exist, just my opinion) and men on the right are thirsting to live their fantasies of a society where violence + big gun = king (they want to play war at the cost of our entire society 🤪). the leftist men all have guns and only half of them have the emotional maturity and mental stability to have one (like for real a lot of you are just as bad as the right with how loony tunes your gun rhetoric and lack of basic safety is, some of you scare me just like the conservative gun nuts do, to be so fucking for real). to be fully dramatic - I am a woman without a country.

maybe ill move near the border and find a nice canadian man on the other side to save me from this shit hole hellscape. if i get lucky i can get some sweet, sweet dual citizenship.

i dont know how we decided to legalize killing women via medical neglect. idk how we came to the conclusion that saving babies means rapists have the right to force whoever they want to birth their children, even if its a child, even if its incest.

too many men have responded to me talking about this entire issue by insisting that im fine in (state of residence with abortion access).

i dont understand why we are suggesting that its acceptable for people to die of treatable stone age bullshit, or for children to be forced to give birth, as long as its in within the boundaries of texas.

I also dont get this suggestion that women and children should "just leave"? you cant just get up and leave the state when youre actively dying. you cant just get up and leave the state as a minor child. what the fuck is wrong with you people? it goes so far beyond abortion - we now know that there will be no improvement for the min wage, no paid maternity or parental leave, no improvements for healthcare access, potential restrictions on birth control, no help with housing, no help with the cost of living, no improvement of education or the cost of higher education, and potential loss of all our social safety nets. the government is trying to force people to reproduce while making the conditions for reproduction deadlier than ever.

the future is bleak.

i feel like ive spent my whole life trying to warn everyone of what is happening now. but the people who didnt listen then still do not care enough now to listen when it comes to the real life consequences of this pro-rape campaign that parades around as "pro life".

america let us know loud and clear: we dont care if you die, and no one is coming to help you.

PS fuck all of you white christian women who voted for this, i truly hate you bitches! I hope you get everything you voted for. to quote AZ, "I hate you fat lizzo! i fuckin hate you girl!"

[systems-overloaded]

feel like theres something on the horizon, like weve been on the precipice of /something/. something big, unknown. (its been like this for i think almost half a year? at least a couple months. idk if this is system-wide or just the select few fronters who i have better communication with though.)

sometimes it feels like its just trapped emotions that need to be released, intense emotions finally coming closer to the surface... but sometimes it feels like something else, something entirely unknown and earth shaking, reality changing, and entirely unknown about if its good or bad or neutral.

today (absolutely triggered by an event yesterday, and influenced by being overwhelmed/overstimulated/shutdown alot of that day) it feels like humiliation and shame and sadness are so strong, forcing its way to the front, to be felt, to be acknowledged, i cant ignore it, its here. as if these emotions are these big entities, larger than me and forcing these sensations upon us.

its here, and it demands to be felt, yet it is unable to be felt. its held behind a paper thin sheet, preventing it from being felt and released. its so intense, yet i know this is only part of what is truly there, the emotions within, the intensity within.

i want to feel it, so i can release it. im trying to. im actively speaking out loud and in my head, journaling, doing somatic things, making space for big things to be felt, and to happen (including being prepared for both an epileptic seizure and/or PNES, or other medical events that could occur).

but im struggling alot. please, i want to heal. i want to be happy, i want to feel at peace. let me release these things. let these emotions pass, and truly be processed. not just squashed further down to arise in unknown ways at unknown times, to subconsciously be wrecking havoc on my mental and physical health.

even if what im trying to feel, to release isnt related to this precipice-sensation, the feelings of grasping for /something/. (maybe stability, maybe distraction from the pains, maybe full attention to the pains, idk). but whether its related to that or not, maybe simply these strong feelings are purely what was created due to the situation yesterday (versus old emotions being triggered). even then, it hurts and i want to release it.

if i cannot be free from it, if i cannot even release it in any way, then at least let it be dimmed by distractions. at least let me dim these feelings, let me make the paper thin sheet thats between us a little less translucent, let me make it a bit more opaque. i need to take care of this body at least and i cannot in the state weve been in since yesterday.

~~~~~~

i know this was long, i guess its another vent piece. but i thought maybe some people could relate. wanting so desperately to heal, and feel better. being able to identify an emotion, locate it in your body even (or other identifiers), maybe even knowing exactly where that emotion came from, and trying so many things to release it, to let it be felt, but not succeeding.

its so confusing, because clearly /it is being felt/, (at least in some way even if not at its full strength), but its just not being released. i know when weve had strong emotions that happened /in the moment/ from events /in that moment/ (or very very recently), we could feel it and release it, and move forward. but this is like, idk i guess its stuck?

maybe its not my own emotions to be felt, and so i cannot release it. maybe the parts who this pain originated from must be the ones to release it?

i worry if thats the case, because there dont seem to be any answers at all when i try to communicate or connect within, not beyond these emotions being blaring-ly loud. and though there seems to be only a thin wall between some of us and these emotions, maybe the wall is thicker than i understand... but thats such a scary thought, because does that mean these emotions are actually much MUCH stronger than they've already been felt? genuinely makes me concerned, can this human body even handle emotions of such a large scale? would we have a heart attack, fatal heart arrhythmia, or something like a stroke or aneurysm? a body much younger, before alot of illness expressions came forward couldve handled some of this im sure, wouldve felt fucking awful, but they wouldve been mostly fine... but this body now is very fragile in health, very sick with physiological/biological illnesses.

~~~~~~

anyways... it still hurts right now tbh, but maybe what it (these emotions, or the parts that hold them?) wanted was to be heard /by others/?

when journaling myself, it wasnt helping. but typing here, seems to have taken a little of the edge/intensity off.

so, thank you for reading if you did. this has been kinda nice. it feels like i can write a letter to the universe, or a friend, and not worry about how i will be perceived. i can be vulnerable and honest about it. alot more open then i would feel safe to even talk with my therapist about, let alone anyone i know irl.

its still there, will demand to be felt later again just as strong... but for now its a bit more manageable, so i can do the bare minimum at least to try and keep this body alive for a couple more days. thank you random internet strangers who might be reading this, knowingly or not, /actually reading this or not/, youve played a part in this.

[grossillygirl]

Just gonna vent this here, genuinely like you a lot, i see your posts and interactions but i don't think it's healthy for me to continue like this.

I think you're amazing but feel like I'm longing for your attention or to give you everything you could possibly want but all I'm doing is craving something... a friendship that i don't that i don't think will ever happen.

I see you have posts about people you chat with share things about and later say it's just random people and for me you're not just some random girl.

You're someone i would like to at the very least be good friends with and I think i feel better saying it here like this than off annon since it's now I feel you see me.

Just know with everything that you have going on good or bad you did had someone always trying to reach out and it was for a genuine connection.

All the best

- random person on the internet who likes you a lot and wanted to be friends

I'm sorry :( I appreciate that you were seeking a genuine connection and friendship with me but i feel like my blog does make it pretty clear that im emotionally unstable & unavailable?? And i dont think theres many ppl off here who I've formed genuine friendships with. Like genuinely a handful. I try my best to not like lead someone on to think ill be able to be a good friend to anyone new. Because I cant. So i dont appreciate this kind of ask which seems like its made to make me feel bad for you/ bad for my behaviour?

Idk like not many ppl on here genuinely expect friendship from me either, i feel like most ppl see my anxious stressed vents and rants and can understand that im not reliable right mow in that way😭 and thats not to be self depreciating either, i would never expect that from someone else going through whay im going through or anything similar. I prefer to give space but also make it clear im here for them & maybe occasional check ups.

Also did i call you a random person on one of my posts on here and you took offense to that? If so I truly apologise for that and I'll be more careful with my posts here on out.