#like this is what life is for. this is what it's about
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
if you don't know where to start with this, just pasting in your favorite lines from the fic into the comment box and adding "i like these!" underneath is so huge. when i'm leaving a comment on writing OR art i try to pick at least one or two things i really liked about it and mention those in my comments.
BTW i see these posts all the time like "ohhh i dont know what to comment on fics.." and every response is "keysmashes! or hearts!! anything works :3" and thats GREAT!! thats helpful!!
but: consider. if u genuinely like analyzing writing.. do u know ur just allowed to go through and quote your favorite parts and ramble abt what they mean to u and the author will LOSE IT WITH HYPE?
genuinely. i felt SO WEIRD the first time i did it.. but like. holy shit authors love it. its crack for authors. the first time i did it, it was on a fic that hadnt updated in half a year, give or take, and the author made 3 updates that month BECAUSE OF MY COMMENT.
LIKE. as an author every comment is INCREDIBLE!!! but also, dont feel like your comment has to be short or otherwise ur invasive or smth!! authors ADORE long comments more than ANYTHING.
#i like the way you wrote [x]!#it makes me feel [y]!#i have to wonder if a lot of the reason isn't energy but a lack of knowing how to comment on someone's work#beyond “wow!” feedback isn't something thats easy to teach nor is it often taught.#but ive found my own life enriched by trying my best to say something more than just “omg!” or such. to slow down and reread#to find my favorite parts. to find symbolism and parallels and all that other literary stuff#or if it's visual art then figuring out not only what i like about it but why i like it#it's hard sometimes! but it's so fun#but yeah. pick one or two things you like about it. it gets easier the more you practice saying
34K notes
·
View notes
Text
i'm going to listen to the album of the artist you like even though he's not really my vibe. i'm going to read the book you suggested even though it's not a genre i usually enjoy. i'll watch the show. i will try the recipe. i will play the video game, or at least watch a deep-dive youtube explaining the really-long lore so i have some idea of what's happening. the movie you suggested is too scary for me, but - i mean, the wikipedia page is kind of interesting - look at the length of the section Controversy.
this is not a burden. i think maybe "burden" and "love" might be oppositional, the way sometimes "love" and "hate" are not opposites. a burden is a dragging. i love you because you brought me to the water, and it is the horizon of your heart. i love you because of your nervous pacing around the edges of the rabbit hole.
often you are right. some songs on that album remind me of the spark in your eyes. the book was really thought-provoking.
more i just want to understand enough that you can talk to me. that you can explain, in depth, why it matters that wheat has shallow roots. i love you, even platonically - your love of this thing leaks into me. i watch you, cautious and dancing, the shy desire for you to smear the colors of this thing into my life, too.
they are your colors, though. of course i want them here, in the marginalia of my life. you matter to me. i want them to crowd the little moments of my day. i want your fingerprints scattered throughout the rooms of my heart.
one time i spent about six months reading and researching a particular author, just so i could talk to one of my friends about him. i never got the chance. she betrayed me, broke my trust, and sided with her abusive ex-boyfriend. standing in the sodden floodplain of what she left over, some bitter part of me asked - isn't that tragic? you have all this knowledge and nothing to do with it.
but i did have all that knowledge, though. when i reach for it, i still feel it glow.
#warm up#spilled ink#writeblr#this ended darker than i meant but really it's about listening to mac miller w/my gf
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Jason, being a semi-canonic common hallucination in the family after his death, could lead to the stupidest AU ever.
Imagine everyone seeing him — Bruce, half of the time, Dick non-stop, Tim more often than not, and eventually even Alfred starts seeing little boy's silhouette in the corner of his eye, but he never admits it, because someone needs to stay sane in this family.
It is a lot like real-life cases when cult families start to see collective hallucination, and it somehow syncronises in their minds, so they hear and see the same things, you know?
So, yeah, everyone sees Jaybin around.
Everyone but Damian. Damian is a normal one. He also knows his Akhi is alive and well, so whatever. And it takes him some time to figure out that his family is bat-shit insane, but when he does, he decides to use it on his advantage.
Damian, calling Jason: Akhi, you should visit me. It is getting awfully boring here.
Jason, frowning: You know I can't. They think I am dead, and I can't risk my plan, especially now, when Red Hood is gaining-
Damian: We will pretend you are a hallucination.
Jason: ...What?
Damian: So, there is a plan...
So, a few days after this call, Jason arrives at the Wayne Manor. He still thinks his brother's plan sucks, but gaslighting is one of his many talents, so surely, they will figure something out. He can lie his way through this meeting.
Expect, he doesn't even need to lie. His family is actually insane.
Bruce, bumping in Jason:
Jason, staring back: Uh-
Bruce: Wow. You look so grown-up. And we look so alike. Nice one, brain.
Jason: ?..
Tim, leaving his room: Hi, B, hi- Oh, damn. Hi, Jaybin. Nice leather jacket.
Bruce: Right? I guess his ghost just grows up with us now.
Jason: ????
Alfred, nodding along, out of nowhere: Master Dick will hate it. He looks taller now.
All of them: (peacefully leave the room)
Jason: What. The. Fuck.
Jason waits for the moment of clarity to happen as he chats with Damian in the kitchen, but... nothing changes. They really, really think he is a hallucination. So... he starts hanging out around more. Both because Damian is getting angsty, and because it is kinda... amusing.
Tim, stuck on the same case for a few nights, non-stop: Oh, it is really just me and you in this, Jason.
Jason, playing Mario Cart on the table by his side: Maybe take a nap, dude.
Tim: No, I need to figure out this case with-
Jason, rolling his eyes: Red Hood had already dealt with it. Go to sleep.
Tim: ...You are such a good self-care kind of hallucination.
Jason: ...
Damian: Your bets, when will they realise that you are a real person?
Jason: At this point, I am not sure that they will, even if I start screaming that I am real.
Damian: Fair. I bet a year would do.
Jason: ...A year and a half.
Dick visits the Manor. He cooes at Jason, muttering something about "of course, he would have grown up in a punk," and Jason almost breaks his role to hit him on the head.
Jason, arms folded on his chest: You know, you need serious help, dad.
Bruce, blinking at him slowly: Probably. You know what else I need?
Jason: Sleep? Retirement? To stop adopting strays? The list is endless, man.
Bruce: ...Coffee. I need more coffee.
Jason, groaning: What the fuck!!!
Alfred figures out that Jason is real, eventually. Solely because he catches him sneaking a few extra cookies, and hallucinations are not supposed to eat. He plays along with him and Damian until the very end, anyway.
(Damian ends up winning the bet because Jason loses it once and pushes Bruce down the stairs, when he starts reciting some precautionary tale about him. Everyone is flabbergasted.)
#jason todd#red hood#dcu comics#dc universe#dcu#batman#bruce wayne#batfamily#batfam#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
ENTROPY
m reader x karina // 13k words
“It’s a stupid bet, Karina.”
Karina lifts an eyebrow, only at certain points in conversation where she thinks your opinion is highly invalid.
“No, it isn’t. You didn’t even let me properly explain,” she tells you, “All I want is a favor. Not a bet.”
“It’s still asking a lot from me when I’m already dealing with your bullshit.”
She sighs, leaning back on the counter. You’ve got a hand to your hip and an expression on your face that says: “fuck off six ways back to Sunday,” That’s how these usual briefings go, the quick dump or fill-in of whatever the fuck is worth sharing in each others’ lives.
Instead, she raises her hands up in surrender, lips pulled inward. “Fine. Would it be better for me to come back to you on this sometime later?”
“Can I suggest not having you bother me ever again?”
A snort, then a cackle is what she gives. So, you roll your eyes because you know that it's always, always a tell-all for disaster.
“Oh honey,” she says, patting your shoulder while you look over to see her running off to do her own thing, “You’re gonna be stuck with me for a long time. You just haven’t seen it yet.”
–
To bring things up to speed: you didn’t know what the fuck you were thinking when you brought Karina along as your roommate.
At first, things were great.
The living styles were well complimented. Separate rooms, similar schedules, the usual activities you’ve done together for fun. Even the chores were assigned (though by second nature and good habits). This small space was well put to be a slice of home away from home whilst going through the ranks of college.
She invited some of her friends and classmates over from time to time; some of which you had a partial interest in. Sometimes you’re out with Karina’s setups, other times she’s the one that’s out and about while you were holding the fort down. For the most part, life was easy having your best friend since middle school hang around with you.
Still, no issues to mention whatsoever.
But then-
“Do you have a minute?”
It’s 8 pm on a Saturday and Karina’s coming to you for her regular yaps and endless rants since the girl just talks and talks and talks.
You curse at yourself at times for always being the listener.
“Yeah,” you say, closing your laptop on the kitchen island when she rounds the corner, coming to your side. “I don’t have anything, so I’ve always got time.”
You’re hoping that it isn’t anything out of the ordinary; from the looks of things, all signs seem to point that way. She’s in her sports shorts with one of your (stolen) t-shirts - the collar cut off highlighting her shoulder - hair tied up and in glasses, you automatically assume that she isn’t going anywhere.
“Remember when I brought up that thing?”
“What thing?”
Then it hits you: that thing.
You had your fingers crossed that she would forget about asking you for whatever she needed you for. Sucks that she had a good memory - not only that, you’ve made yourself reliable for her so many times before; turning her down was simply an impossibility.
Not all heroes wear capes, sadly.
Karina slaps your shoulder, easily seeing through your mask of sarcasm.
“Don’t act dumb, genius. That ‘thing’ was just coming along with me for once.”
Her brows furrowed, the corners of her lips tracking back across her cheeks. You can’t say no let alone ignore the poor girl.
“You know me with outings,” you reason, sensible. In most cases like these, Karina comes to you out of others to bring up her issues, her dilemmas; her self-inquisitions, as she would like to call them from time to time. And usually, they’re straightforward. This should be an easy cakewalk. “I’m all for it, but what’s the point when you force me to be more sociable when you’re dragging me around?”
“Because maybe you’re the biggest pussy I’ve had the misfortune of being with.” Karina huffs, arms crossed and face left in distress. She examines you so closely under her microscope that it’s borderline invasive - but you don’t tell her that. So you twine your fingers in between each other and return the laser-focused stare she’s giving you, taunting almost along the lines of - look, if you’re gonna be convincing, you gotta do better than that.
All she does is throw a shoulder shrug, awkwardly - dropping them so fast that you’re putting everything in your willpower to not notice the subtle bounce of her chest.
Her palm faces up toward the ceiling, hoping for a response. You purse your lips out to spite her. She has to deal with your bullshit head-on, tragically.
“It’s always the work, gym, eat, sleep, do more work at home, and repeat. All the fucking time. So bland and-”
You tilt your head the more her insults fill your ears.
“You disgustingly piss me off.”
Her fingers press on your forehead when you give the subtle eye smile and smirk combination, finally pushed over the edge now she doesn’t want anything to do with you. She paces around the kitchen and you can see her eyes dart over at the corner.
She won’t leave you alone.
Not until she gets what she wants.
Besides, you’ve learned that Karina isn’t very good at persuading people to do something. Though eventually-
“Why didn’t you just say you’re inviting me to go out for a night?” You ask, knowing that the bluntness is one of the few ways to bring Karina back around once she’s done with her tantalizing tangents. “You wouldn’t be here going crazy if you just told me-”
“Because you’re the one who can’t seem to get it through your thick-ass skull in the first place!” She exclaims, first underneath her shirt that reveals some of the skin on her waist, the ends of her panties now apparent the more her boxer shorts keep slacking off her hips. You can’t afford to stare. You know you can’t.
The recurring cycle of interest: keeps coming back to haunt you.
You concluded or accepted the fact years ago that Karina was never meant to be yours. Yet- she would always come to you whenever she had boy problems or wanted your opinion on what she should wear or do with every single one of her crushes she ever had throughout her life, hiding the fact that you wanted to be one of them at some point.
All those wet dreams, fantasies, the fake situations of romance you’ve deluded yourself into - those kinds of things had to be channeled into something else to fill the space.
You’ve kept it cool. Sometimes, in between the bleeding weeks, where she’s roaming around the house in the shortest pair of shorts, the tightest of tank tops, the curves way more present when she’s light on the balls of her feet, you eventually broke and resorted to that trusty old lotion and sock combo behind the door to your room.
With a girl dressed like that, and those tits filling up your brain-
(You’d be committing perjury holding yourself back for as long as you did.)
“Okay, for the last time,” says Karina, hands stacked and her feet crossed. “All I ask is for you to just get out of the apartment for once, and have some fun. Is that hard?”
You shake your head. “No, of course it isn’t.”
Karina nods, content. She takes off her glasses and puts it on the marble counter, her pretty lashes batting with those violet-black eyes of hers. “There. That wasn’t so difficult, was it?”
And there she goes, tapping your forearm while you nod in agreement; does a little hop in place like some cute bunny, her shirt loose and flowing and moving everywhere. She’s such a fucking bitch. So shameless. This girl’s attitude will be the death of you.
She’s shaking her fists up in the air, doing some cha-cha move. The shirt isn’t doing her justice for her fucking breasts.
Then she leans in, close. Her breath grazes your face and neck. She scrunches her nose while you’re ‘shooing’ her away; aware of the message and her point. Karina then steps back, tying a knot to her shirt, making her figure a lot more apparent. By some crazy form of timing, you turn your body towards her, freezing in place while the shirt molds around her chest, her waist - you’re clenching your jaw and gritting your teeth behind your lips since you wonder if she’s doing it on purpose.
The imagination. The possibilities.
“C’mon,” Karina says, reaching for your hand and tugging it, tilting her head up and angrily pouting. For fucks sake, the slightest resistance of pull makes those mounds bounce in place. You’re sick and twisted; she’s the sole reason to blame. “I want you to be my plus one.”
“Had I not already said yes?” You’re asking, swearing under your breath. The ‘plus one’ role is a direct translation to ‘hey, i’m going to get fucked up tonight, and i want you to be there on standby to carry me home or even dd, okay?’. You remember from past experiences that it also means that being with her is a dice roll of what kind of Karina you have to deal with: the kissy Karina, the pissed-off Karina, the Karina with the ‘carry me home with the eyes that say fuck me until I can’t walk’ attitude.
Sigh and roll your eyes back, it’s burned into your memory anyway.
Putting it in layman’s terms wasn’t gonna cut it. Being honest isn’t gonna change her mind. You could get the King of England to threaten her for a price on her head and she’ll still find a way to get it overturned.
As nicely as you’d want to be, it can only hold for so long.
Karina isn’t the kind of person to throw you into the fire right away -no, she’s smarter than that.
“You did,” she says, shaking her head side to side, moving her shoulders along since you’ve put her in a good mood. You’re trying to decode the action to the expression, connecting the dots possible if she’s fucking around or being genuine. Give into the preaching and encouragement that if you did go with her you’d have your fun with someone like her carrying half her energy - okay, you have a type; nothing wrong with that, but still. “Why? Don’t tell me you’re having second thoughts already?”
You have a hand up along with your mouth open; Karina’s a bit dense to think pragmatically.
“What’s it gonna take with you to get off of your lazy ass and live life? When was the last time you and I went out together and did some dumb shit? That was when you had that thing with- who was that one girl? Winter? Or was it Giselle?” Karina carries on, trailing off with you walking not far from her.
She pulls the hair tie out of her head - after what it seems to be five minutes since putting it on - her head moves to let the messy locks flow and pool behind her back, stretching her arms out before turning left and into her room. You stop at the doorway when she turns around, arms braced to the frame, smirking.
“You said you weren’t doing anything, right? And you don’t have work until next week, right? So that automatically means that you’re free for the weekend?”
“Well, yeah. Don’t forget that you went out with me and Ningning for that boring ass movie. So please, if you stop giving me shit for this, can I at least get ready before we head out?”
Karina groans. “Ugh, why are you so fucking difficult to work with? I’ve set you up with three of my friends so far and only one of them has gotten close to getting in bed with you.”
“Maybe I’m complicated,” you say back, turning the other cheek and thinking about that specific time not that long ago when she gave you the double thumbs up before being dragged by Winter onto the dance floor at that club near the school.
“Complicated people don’t put their hands behind their back and let the girl get all touchy with them,” she teases, stopping in the middle of your doorway, shirt off and all she’s got is that jet black bra with the thinnest straps you’ve ever seen on her collarbones, but she doesn’t stop there: “Might I add that you wanted to try your luck into dating again and- hey. I know that kiss with Winter was the best one you’ve had in a while.”
Karina smiles at your confused expression, hitting a pressure point. You’ve folded for girls before. She was there for some part of the fun. It’s a weakness; playing to your ideal characteristics and all she has to do is play the matchmaker and watch the magic happen. She got close. Almost. The support was unwavering, but you’re still searching.
You don’t take long to get yourself situated, putting on whatever essentials you felt was right. Karina took a little bit more time to get ready. You know how she is: every part of her outfit has to be thought-out and well-layered if means of raising the ‘down to get fucked’ meter up past the 100-point scale. Sometimes it takes five minutes, other times it takes hours.
She walks out of the hallway in a simple outfit. A grey tank top and baggy jeans that nearly cover her feet. Her brown leather jacket was the finishing touch draped around her arm, wrist, and fingers shining in her typical jewelry.
The makeup was light too, a soft blush applied but the main culprit was her lips - and man, they have no right being that plump.
“You’re staring.”
A blink and a smirk here. An eyebrow raised soon after: “Are you saying I’m being rude?”
“No.”
It doesn’t register in your mind that she’s all up in your space the next second, holding your breath when she looks up to your chin.
“Is there something that you want to tell me?”
“Karina-”
“C’mon, you’ve thought about me that way at least once-”
“Fucks sake Karina, you’re delusional. I would never. ”
She nods with a devilish grin, tilting her chin up, humming. You’re breathing out of your nostrils when she backs away, heading over to the door to put on her shoes. Everything that this woman does makes you reconsider the consequences (but hey, you’ve imagined what it would be like for her to wake up in your bed, wear your clothes she won’t think of returning unless you fuck that bratty attitude off her tongue.) A woman like her who can do it all, and you’re holding her jacket once you and her step out of the apartment and close the door.
Most people would give their praise and high regard for putting up with her for this long because you’ve held out longer than anyone would have imagined.
You’ve dealt with her energy all these years, the countless shenanigans that you have gone through with her since high school, and occasions where she shouldn’t have dragged you in but still did anyway. There’s a tolerance that one can only take so much of with Karina, and you always fail at that. (Always.)
She’s too good to be real.
Later, she’s on the phone, calling and texting her other friends that she planned on meeting up with, waiting out in the front yard while you’re keeping her close - like what a natural bodyguard would do with their assignment.
“Are you wearing my jacket?” asks Karina, pinching at the pelt. “I was gonna use that for later.”
“I look better in it,” you muse. “But I’ll give it back to you later when it gets colder.”
“I’m gonna need it later for my look.”
“That look you have right now is gonna get you fucked.”
Karina gives you the same tilt of her head; this time, there’s a slight twinkle in her eyes that looks like the lightbulb just went off in her head. You’ve lit the match within her or signed someone off to their demise waiting for them in the next hour or so.
She bites down her smile, her ego inflated. “Guess we can put that as a separate bet between us, then.”
–
Well.
Fuck.
You realize right away that going out didn’t seem to be a bad idea after all.
Plus, it’s only been roughly two hours since Karina convinced you to help her out and tag along so now you’re here: a half-full cup of her go-to and watching the sight of everyone having their fun with one other person or in a group. She, on the other hand, has a guy with her - breaking down the awkward wall and playing the act of softening up with the blaring music.
It’s a steady groove, music flows in her body so elegantly.
The ambiance alone pounds your eardrums, eyes occasionally getting blinded by the flashing lights coming from the DJ’s stage, dancing her heart away and letting loose because it’s the weekend. She’s not the only one, too. Her little entourage surrounds her, dancing along and giving their attention to Karina - each one of them attractive and dazzling to look at. Karina was never one for the limelight, but once she’s got something going, it never leaves her.
You can catch yourself getting sucked in the moment you laid your eyes back on her.
The law of attraction: embodied by Karina. A phenomenon that you’ve learned happens on a weekend basis. Everyone that knows or has met her for the first time, is automatically influenced by her which doesn’t take much for that to happen. Some are joining in for the vibe, while others are trying to lean into her ear and get her attention that way, let their bodies do the talking, and see if she’s willing.
Bad news, this girl is. You’re treading dangerous waters carefully.
Moment by moment, every single guy who tries to approach Karina retreat in dejection and defeat. You can see it in their heads hanging in shame, the slanted lips, some make a last-ditch effort to bring her back to the bar for another drink, only to be stopped with the simple raised hand of hers, friends coming along as reinforcements to stop the inquisitions.
Her eyes lock on to you, watching from afar. Like a lighthouse; a signal and a haven for her to find comfort in. She motions you to come to the dance floor; and to that, you raise your glass in earnest, insisting that where you are right now is fine.
You keep staring, sipping.
She’s fixed up her top again to where the curves are much more present than usual.
So you decide to down your bearings, hoping that the thought of Karina could be swallowed down with ease; her damned smile, head tilts, the swaying of her body (along with bouncing in some places without a care in the world) to the upbeat tunes until she’ll decide she can’t do it anymore.
At some point, she’ll have to come get you to join.
And you’ve accepted that it will happen sooner or later.
Your shoulder gets bumped by one of the people making their way through on accident, diverting your attention for a second. Then-
Karina’s out of your line of sight.
Next thing you know-
She taps your shoulder, tugging on your shirt.
“Hey-”
The words you were going to say were: ‘hey, what gives?’ or ‘something wrong?’; but for some reason, you’re left in a stun lock - a trance. There’s also another thing that you realize right away when she has her arms slithering around your middle and up your shoulders.
She looks around as you track her head movements, checking for something - ensuring that the coast is clear - you can start to get an idea of what she’s trying to do. Your brows furrow, thrown off by Karina’s stoic expression. It’s impossible to see or understand what’s going through her head, but she nicks her head back towards the dance floor, and you instantly get the message.
“Need you in here, now,” she mouths, but you tilt your head down to hear her repeat it. She then pulls onto the floor while you’re also surveying the crowd, seeing if there was anything fishy.
Karina guides your hands around her waist, noticing her fingers twitch as they graze your forearm, hinting that something was off. You’ve been near her before, but not like this. She then bumps into a few people standing behind her, prompting you to pull her back towards you - pressing her body, hand now to your neck, chin resting on top of her head-
You can deduce that this is not her usual self - the reverberating bass pounding into your bodies and hers serving as this sort of proxy to dance more and think less.
She scratches the ends of your hair right above the nape, irises burning into your face. You assume that this was the favor that she was talking about: going to the club with her and having a good time? Why the fuck did she have to make it sound so complicated in the first place?
“Stay close to me, okay? There’s this guy that’s been trailing us since we got here. I just need some time - help me out, please.”
You look over your shoulder, Karina centers herself with her hands cupped around your neck, peering over as well. The strobe light blinds your vision for a second before turning back. “Wait, how can you be sure?”
“Trust me,” she tells you, expression flat, serious. “You’ve got a good sixth sense about these kinds of things anyway, you’ll know.”
“But-”
“Isn’t that the guy you mentioned just now-”
Karina’s quick to get a finger between your lips, darts her eyes out then onto you. The indication alone confirms all of your suspicions. You can’t even see the poor guy, not when the flashing lights are giving you nothing but snapshots amongst the silhouettes and shapes in the dark. “Look, be cool. You’re safe with me. If he gets close I’ll get in–”
“No wait- it’s fine. Just leave him alone,” she butts in, leaning her head against your chest so she can hide her face. “This is already good, okay? You did great.”
You cradle the side of her head when she looks up, tongue caught between her teeth slightly. “No, I want to see what was his deal-”
“Can you shut the fuck up already?”
“Karina, I-”
She pulls your head into hers: locking lips, derailing your train of thought.
You make a sound in her mouth in response to the confusion, but it stops the bickering you two were doing a few seconds ago. She could feel you pull away, but leans her head up back for more, claiming your lips through the kiss; you swear that you and her aren’t that drunk yet.
It shuts you up, alright. A moment of reprieve that doesn’t give you any time to think because fuck, this girl is making you second guess every single choice you’ve made in your life up till this point, wondering if you’re ever going to take your golden chance or give Karina an earful when you and her get back home later.
Your fingers dig into the dips of her lower back, her hands on your cheeks, overloading your senses with her lips, giving you hard teeth and a swiping tongue - no time to think or catch up.
The rest of the world fades out from your head, nothing between you and Karina putting everything on the line in terms of her feelings - almost like the roles had been reversed with her struggling to believe you had a thing for her and you letting your actions do all the talking.
You’re not thinking about the amount of regret you’ll have once all of this is over. Friends just don’t kiss each other out of the blue. No. Karina fed you the false belief that you’d do anything she’d ask you to do, which is why you’re doing this with her. You think this is all a dream, but you sense everything; that diminishes the present thought right away.
You’ll give as much passion back to Karina, because it’s what you would do for her regardless:
Follow her lead, and listen to what she says; there’s always something with her that you’re blindly agreeing to.
Karina pulls away for a moment to breathe, next thing you know her tongue slips past against yours, and your grip on her body becomes a lot less pleasant since she’s unleashed that craving hidden within.
You touch her teeth, smiling. Her forehead gently rubs against yours, breaking the kiss, when you notice it in your peripheral:
A girl with a hand to her mouth.
One girl next to her with her hand wound up in her hair, in complete shock.
The third girl behind the two nodded in approval with a sly smirk.
Yeji, Ryujin, and Yujin: Karina’s other cute little trio, watching their lovely friends finally have their moment together.
You look back at Karina, rubbing her bottom lip with her finger, internalizing the taste of you.
Then the realization settles in.
“That guy backed away from us,” she tells you, “but I gotta say, you’ve outdone yourself.”
You glance over to see Karina’s trio watch as said guy turns his back into the crowd, retreating away.
“What’s the matter? Speechless?” she asks again, finger happily dancing along your skin, and your hands aren’t moving off her body. You’ve never been shy with her, except this one time: right now.
“Never with you,” you answer, matching her smug expression. “Never.”
Karina hides her true intention again for a second, knowing that it’ll wither away the more she acts like this. Right, she can say one thing, though her actions are so easy to read from the minute she’s invaded your personal space.
This girl is bad news in everything.
So you hold your gaze with her, wondering, connecting the dots. Speculating how long she’s been planning for this to happen, to be like every other guy that’s ever tried to get her in their bed or between those legs. Even so, she knows you’re not simple to break, and that’s where she’s got you. “I knew you had to be sure somehow, just didn’t think you’d go this far.”
“Desperate times, desperate measures.” Karina eyes cross slightly as she stares at you, thumb grazing along your chin. “You were taking too long for my liking.”
Liking? Surely not.
There’s no possible way she could-
“What the hell does that mean?” You ask, staring back, tongue tip between your teeth. Your breathing starts to shallow.
Karina leans into the side of your head, amidst the noise of the speakers and funneling her voice well in your ear canal. “It doesn’t make sense to me, you know. How we’ve known each other for this long, and we haven’t thought of even trying it at least once.”
She knows where she’s going with this - all those times you’ve ogled at her hoping that she wouldn’t notice - or all of those times where you’ve talked about everything that had to involve life at any given point. You’d hoped that you dodge the question for a little longer.
Karina’s friends managed to crack it out of you a while back, remembering it well. Her touch on your body has gone gentler, never breaking her gaze on you.
“How come you and I have never hooked up with each other?”
You freeze. Feel the warmth spread across your cheeks; it’s an immediate catch, and you were praying silently that this was a dream.
Exposed. Is what you are.
Though Karina doesn’t falter here. Her eyes shimmer in the dim lighting. Wistful. You’re giving her enough time to figure out where your head was leveled at; like she would understand whether you wanted this or not.
“Honestly, we could’ve.” You admit, with a sharp inhale. Hoping that the answer alone is enough for her sake. “Like- god, it would’ve been so easy. I wanted-”
“Is it because you and I are just friends? That’s complete bullshit if that’s what you’re sticking with. I’ve seen you look at me that way before, or with my back turned; goes to show that you don’t have what it takes to get what you want, but I do.”
You pull her close, and that gets her flustered.
Both of your hands are on her face, leaning on her, stopping right at the lips, watch her eyelids flutter in anticipation. The thrumming of your heartbeat pounds between your eardrums, until she looks at you dead in the eyes, sliding her hand lower and lower, quirks her eyebrows once her fingers lay land over your pants.
Your throat bobs, swallowing on nothing. The lightbulb sets off in her head.
“Would you look at that? Oh my. Honey, you’re just like the rest of them. Try to deny it all you want, but you can’t get the thought of using my body to get yourself off. And guess what? I’d let you.”
She’s got a key charm in being forward. And you find it to be so fucking sexy; saying things like that with no care for who hears, keeping it blunt and straight to the point; she could talk her way out of a speeding ticket and she really could. Karina was simply being herself, you could point the culprit in the alcohol or maybe her friends, but you’re still caught in her crosshairs and the window of escape is closing fast.
You don’t do anything to resist the pair of hands at your neck and the seat of your pants - or the fact that she’s yanking your head back to meet hers and you hear all her friends squeal at the mere sight of Karina getting her chance. Everything about this is sensational, a new thing to adapt and learn by the minute.
Here, when she lets you pull away: “You can do better than that, sweetie. Tell. Me.”
You’ll tell her everything that she wants to hear: how you’ve had a crush on her since high school, how you’ve managed to stay by her side after all these years, the fact that you couldn’t jeopardize what you already had. Besides, the risk of losing her as a lover and a friend was too much to bear, that she isn’t the kind of girl to have sex with because you love her and that will be the end of it all.
Sooner than later, you’ll tell her that. So to suffice, you say: “I could’ve, believe me. We just never did.”
From that alone, Karina shakes her head, neither rejecting nor accepting. Her wrists slack behind your neck, bring her waist closer until you’re able to lace your fingers around your arm. You’re nervous at what might be going through her head right now, gnawing your inner lip to keep your mind occupied.
She looks you dead in the eyes, a twinkle behind them: full of inspiration, desire, hunger, want.
You kiss her again, because you believe that’s the only thing right to do. “How bout this,” she says, giddy and sultry, “Why don’t we find this out for ourselves?”
–
This wasn’t the first time you’ve been in this position.
And certainly, it won’t be the last, either.
You’ve put up with Karina’s bullshit for as long as you could remember: from carrying her on your back after a long night out to those times of sleeping on the couch since she complained her bed was too stiff and decided to use yours. You can think of one instance of every emotion she has, nothing but fun memories in those moments.
However, you’ve never been like this with her.
Until tonight.
You catch yourself failing miserably in keeping your guard up with Karina. Not when she’s taking every red light as her chance to kiss you in the car, her hand sliding under your shirt and grazing your pants shamelessly. Not when you’ve pressed her tits up against the elevator door and flipped her around kissing you once more so that the camera guy can see, hear her giggle and hum at this new and improved version of you that she’s created.
It’s all a rush for her, the way you can’t let go of her past the door, pin her hips against the kitchen counter, peel off the layers of clothes starting with her jacket, grasp her breast held captive by the tight holds of her tank top. You raise her on the marble so that she can match your height - make her feel taller, build that ego up, give her the false impression that she’s the one having fun.
Most definitely on the fact that you’ve got her tank top off in record time, gawking at the immeasurable amount of skin along those luscious valleys you’ve classified as her breasts.
Karina’s head goes sideways, inquisitive. She sees you have your sights set on the prize, all within arms reach. “That’s cute, you’ve been eyeing these babies ever since I moved in, god you’re not that hard to whirl around.” You have your fun at her neck while her fingers are working fast at your pants, sliding her hand underneath the elastic of your boxers-
“Jesus baby,” she husks, appalled with the curl of your fingers along the length. She thought the bulge earlier was already apparent enough - oh how wrong she was, looking down at the newly claimed prize. “Since when the fuck were you hiding this from me? This is not the same cock I hear you jerk yourself off with now and then-”
“Just one of my few surprises,” you cut her off, jolting your hips forward when the grip around your girth gets a tad bit tighter. “Believe me when I say this, you ain’t seen nothing yet.”
Karina wets her lip, biting.
She’s getting used to the new feeling of this. Of you. Her small hand holds you in place, trying to find the right words to describe or end with. You’re trying to see how far she would go - how much could she take; then, she drives another nail into the coffin: “Fuck. You’re like- really big.”
You grin, since that’s got enough weight in the words to inflate your confidence through the roof. She twists her hand around while you’re peppering her face with your lips, over and over and over, until she’s completely broken you down and all signs seem to be pointing in that direction.
You hear her hum in approval, sighing in relief, whisper these praises laced with your name. And when she says your name, genuinely, it comes off in a moment of seriousness - hallowed even.
She’ll make you plummet into the depths of hell, or raise you to the golden pearly gates above; no matter the difference, you’re falling for one of two ways with her.
It’s also putting you in a bad position because you know her experiences, what she wants, the mere basics of it. You pull her hips as she twists her hand by reflex, like it has a mind of its own, pumping your length.
You hate how good she is at working you up. The wonders in sleight of hand: where to curl her fingers, how fast she should handle the strokes, the press of her thumb down on your tip, studying it while trying to figure out where to even start.
“It’s not even fair at this point,” she tells you, sly smirking while you see her eyes fall halfway, softly laughing as she sees your knees buckle and hit the cabinet beneath her because you can’t respond properly. “You’re gonna take care of me so well. Using this to fuck my brains out.”
Her smile goes even wider when your head falls back involuntarily, giving Karina the window to leave some marks of her own across your chest.
Her ankles rest at the back of your thighs, leaning forward to get her other hand on your throbbing shaft, paying attention to your balls, weaving them between her fingers, dividing and conquering to no avail, to turn your mind into a puddle.
“It’s gonna look so pretty in my ass,” Karina whispers into your ear, leaving more kisses behind, making you feel like you’re on cloud nine. “I bet I could make you cum with just my mouth, my hands. Maybe I’ll give you a tease, spread my legs and let you slip inside right here, since you’re so fucking hard that you could knock me out with this cock, hm?”
Oh, what in the actual fuck-
Right out of the gates, this girl is forcing you to be head over heels - to submit and bend to her will; she knows what to preach, her words alone fulfilling every single fantasy you have in the book, to take what’s hers and feed you that overpowering urge above all: to simply ruin her.
Unpredictability is something that Karina takes pride in: going slow at one point, then faster the next, dragging and shortening your breath in every stroke until the pressure becomes too much.
She nods at her handiwork, sliding off the counter and pulling you by the dick across the apartment. That alone makes you snap and pin her - grab her by the arm and spin her around - press and bend her body over on the couch for a quick second.
You pull her by the hair and shift her head; forcing her to lean up for a kiss. Flush your hips with hers where the weight of you might make her crumble right away.
You almost feel bad about it, but that thought gets quickly diminished, because Karina knows how much she can handle. She wants to be taken rough, split apart, worship her body like it's some new testament you’ll reflect on in adoration, have her cunt fucked so thoroughly by you that she’ll come crawling back craving for more.
“How long have you been waiting for this?” Karina grins into your cheek, running her hand up over yours greedily grasping at her tit. “All those slutty things I kept telling you, seems like you wanted some of the fun as well, huh?”
Okay, she’s not wrong at all. You’ll bank that on the fact that she has most definitely heard you jerk yourself off at night, or the fact you’ve seen her walk out the shower naked but pretend to look the other way. With all those stories of her escapades, part of you wanted to join along now and then.
So you give her mercy and lift yourself off from her, watch her glance over her shoulder when you’re following her to your room, fingers to the latch of her bra, the garment slipping off and falling to the floor. Her back is hypnotic to look at, and you find yourself chasing after her for another go.
“This is gonna be bad for you,” she giggles, holding her by the door frame while your hands have a mind of their own, freely roaming across the canvas of her perfect body, sliding up and down and feeling the untouched territory yet to be claimed. “Can’t even stay away from me even for two seconds.”
She sticks her ass out, dips her head down when you get a hold of her mound, the flesh alone having its little weight to it, graze your thumb over her nipples, pinch it, kiss the back of her neck, and leave another mark. You are going to take your sweet time with her; use your teeth, your mouth, your cock. Anything and everything in your arsenal to make Karina yours.
It starts with the letdown. Now, we’re at a shuffle - a waltz, a sloppy waltz - until Karina spins herself around while you settle at the edge of your bed, hike up to your hips, rest them there, forearms on shoulders, kissing you once more.
A gentle moan slips out of her mouth when you finally start indulging yourself in her fabulous tits. Seeing out the amount of fun you are going to have: licking, kissing, biting along the perfect skin. Your mind can’t seem to register the fact that your hands were made for holding them; the fit alone, it feels so nice.
Fuck, it’s even better once you realize she’s so responsive to the touch. That alone prompts you to add oil to the fire and drop the intimate act for something more primal, hungrier. She does this little shimmy with her upper body, moving her breasts around for your mouth to be caught in between them like two mushy pillows molding around your face.
Her hand slips under and grips around you again, the friction causing you to bite down on her skin. A fair trade at least - a two-way system - you touch her, she touches you.
“God, I think I know why you held yourself back with me for this long,” her words heavy and just coherent enough to understand, “maybe I convinced myself that I couldn’t handle you.”
You laugh into her breasts, her hand on the back of your head, tugging while she hears the hums.
She sighs, relieved. Like there’s a weight finally off her shoulders. “Why didn’t we do this sooner?” One second later, she pushes your head away, jaw slack, eyes clouded with lust, drunk on the taste of her skin, your hand sliding lower and lower from her waist, the warm surface getting even hotter when you reach her panties, grazing the lace.
“It’s unreal, I don’t even have to tell you to say anything-” she sucks in a breath at the feeling of your fingers soaking up her slick, swipe your thumb upwards across her clit. “You win baby. I’ll let you have your way. I promise.” She tilts your head up for a kiss, grining her hips down, forcing the groan from you down her throat. “I can give you everything you ever dreamed of having.”
You don’t even know where to fucking start.
“Don’t put words in my mouth,” you say, hitting the tip of your nose against hers; get a light-hearted laugh out. “I’ll make you regret them.”
“Oh yeah? Why don’t you tell me what’s going through your head right now? With me on top? I’m all ears.”
It’s even worse when you see her hand slithering down from her tits. Lower. Lower. The influence already affects you when she brings your hand around your cock, slowly tugging along as she treats herself to such a sight.
That said sight of Karina playing with herself; sighing, murmuring, tilting her head slightly as her breath shudders at the sound of you groaning whilst doing the same thing with yourself. You see the damage, the marks, the places where you’ll leave more bruises than before.
You just have to- fucking- look. You have her in such a state that you have never imagined yourself being in, and now that’s realized right in front of your eyes.
So you tell her exactly how you’ll fuck her. What position she likes the most, where does she want you to take her, how much you’ll twist her mind into becoming more desperate for you and your cock, when you’ll make her cum, rail that poor cunt of hers until she’s sobbing in the filthiest fucking mess possible.
“I’d be sinning,” you tell her, admittedly. “If I didn’t say that you’ve never imagined me fucking your tits unlike now. Better yet-”
“And let me guess, you were hoping to God that there was at least somebody out there who could fulfill that desire for you, right?” Karina interrupts, hand still in between her legs, watching you shamelessly jerk yourself off. She sighs, “So original. I think you deserve more than that.”
Uhm- well- okay, yeah.
“What, too weird?” You ask right after, breathless, your shaft throbbing around your fingers a tad early for your taste. “Ouch. I get it. It’s fine.”
“No, no, no,” Karina sighs, licking her lips. Her eyes shine through yours, a supernova unraveling. “I think we can settle with this. You fix me, I fix you. Deal?”
Who’s to say that there was a chance Karina had the same vision as you?
–
It’s a freeze-frame moment when the realization hits you for the first time.
You’re seeing, but still having a tough time believing:
The sight of your cock being swallowed up by her tits, tongue laving at the tip, her hands compressing her chest inwards so that she can hold you there - focus on her lips and listen to the soft moans all lovely and adoring. Your poor cock: leaking with precum mixed with spit and when it’s all slicked up, you’ll put her on her back and make her press her breasts together, slip right back inside the heat and press into the friction. A gift from the heavens, you think. God, you’ll praise and worship them for as long as you live.
“Shit,” you barely manage, rasping, like it’s some epiphany, as if this was new for her. “Karina, that’s incredible.”
Her eyes dart at you, lashes flickering. The subtlety alone is near cute, even when her fingers dig into the skin of her tits, pinching at the nipples, tongue hanging out as some of the spit starts to drip over into the cleavage.
She lowers her mouth right above the tip, seals it around your thick cockhead lightly. “Really?”
You clench your jaw a little tighter, “God,” you huff, tensing up your hips for the thrust, fucking into the pressure, stare as she moves her tits downward to meet in the middle. “Fuck, yes.”
“Don’t you suppose that this is good for me as well?” She then asks, dazed.
“Why- fuck. Why the fuck are you asking me?” You rasp, tone gentle the next second. “Judging how hard you’re pressing, I hope that you won’t let that go to your head.” Karina’s face lights up with excitement, tilts her head down into your hand, smirking as she hears the stable breathing. Her brown eyes - like her tits - are soft, easy; her plump bottom lip sweeps the head of your cock once again.
She hums as she stares. Chuckles at the mere buck of your hips. Cute.
“Hmmm, maybe I will,” she accepts.
You scoff, mixed with relief and with disbelief because Karina’s tits are fucking unreal and to top it all off she’s sucking you off while your cock is held captive between them; though you’re stuck in a hypnosis and that’s the only sensible reaction of Karina that you could give her. “Karina,” you’re seething, “Jesus, Karina-”
She moves her chest in this side-to-side motion, wiggling her tits like it’s some shameless dance move, proposing. “What’s the matter, baby? All that waiting and you can’t hold it together?” She asks, arms moving inward with her elbows at the bottom line - her drool dribbling down her tongue and into her cleavage in this messy waterfall. “You wanna cum in between my fucking tits, hm? Right in the middle? Paint them white over these red marks you kissed all over-”
The sound ripping from your throat is an indication of the first layer of your inner wall being broken down. It’s just for show, but she’s taking it literally. She has a knack for talking filthy. Here you are losing it. Her hand holds you by the base and pumps you - rubs your balls for good measure, pushing, soothing, encouraging - and Karina’s eyes shimmer while her mouth shifts, something more shrewd, vicious.
“You fit so well here,” she gasps, “God, I wonder how it’ll feel when you stuff up my tiny pussy-”
Your head falls back and you’re swearing. Clenching your fists while your elbows start to slide back.
“Karina,” you say again, because it’s easier to speak than think. “I’m- I’m,”
Her lips pout, shaking her head, disappointed. “No. Don’t,” she sighs, “Don’t you dare,” she says next, “please, I want it inside, inside me - in my pretty little pussy, make me feel good, so full, want your - mmm,” you see her eyes close, biting her lip at the idea, whining, “you’ve dreamt of cumming inside me - breeding me, knocking me up for fun-”
This girl is something else - good on you to match up to her craziness - and you’re biting your lip along with her as well, watching her hand slip under to her clit while she holds your dick between her tits, thighs shaking as she spreads - it’s ingrained into your head, the sight of it. She wants you to breed her, or whatever is remotely close to cumming on her - and Karina will keep on asking for your input of all these things she’s projecting, leave it up to interpretation before acting on it. You’ve never thought you’d see yourself be like this, let alone have Karina act this way all for you. You’ll keep pondering about it long after you’ve had your fill - or her having her fill - it could go both ways for all you know.
Still. The girl keeps moving.
“Oh my fuck,” you slip out, different sayings all preaching the same message, “that feels so fucking incredible,” which isn’t enough to describe the present state of things nor does it fulfill the bare minimum of everything either but for Karina’s ego and with her smirk - because that’s how it always was, just feels right.
“You’ve never said anything about it, but you’re obsessed,” Karina taunts. “This mouth, these tits, they’re all for you - you could have me any way you want,” she keeps her hands moving while her head sways from one end to the other, sighing as her tongue stops at her teeth. “Look at you. I’ve never seen you so desperate to fuck a slut like me and claim her like she’s yours.”
She presses inward with her tits. You feel your shaft swell even harder. A lift up, then a drop. Repeat. You’re tensing every muscle in your waist as hard as you can.
“So?” You ask weakly, huffing. “So what, okay- shit. You-”
Next thing you do is pick up right where you left off. Thrusting into her tits and feel your pace fluctuate to the point that it’s gotten so dirty as you’d imagine fucking her cunt could get, hips smacking skin on skin, into the softness of her breasts, wet sounds and gasps let out through every slap.
“Right there, cum,” she mutters, irises foggy, straight out of your wet dreams, leaning her neck forward with her jaw hung open so that you can fuck yourself straight into her mouth, look down at your wobbling hips - throbbing and twitching as she drinks in the sight of you nearing that edge. “Fuck my tits like that, cum all over them, wanna feel, wanna hear how much you want me.”
You say her name, or at least try to. The sound incoherent, broken, and apologetic; just downright humbling. The best thing you can do is make good on your part. Your cock is so deep in between her tits, the messy slick and warmth enveloping you wholly; fingers doing the little adjustments, a rough measure of how her pussy will wreck your dick later - dragging her breasts across the sensitive edges, the lightest touch of her fingers at the top, flicking the underside. It’s too much, too fast, too-
“God, Karina-”
“Oooh,” she beams, ecstatic. “Oh my god.”
Soon you feel yourself spilling everything in the tightest spot of her breasts, mouth slacking as she watches in awe of your cock tensing and erupting your release all over the skin of her chest, her throat. Her chest heaves along with the pulsing, shaking her tits soon after, gently pumping out the remnants of white, squeezing. It’s unholy what she’s doing, eyes glassy and spit slathered across the space, face flushed and chin dripping with your cum; and she lowers herself to where your shaft is in line with her face, pursing her lips - like some money shot - full and getting an appetizer of what’s to come. You ghost your hand to the back of her head, cautiously - the hand between her legs treats to her clit, the other wrapped around your shaft and smacking your dick on her cheek, so it’s a definite premonition come to life: her on her knees and dreamily staring at your dick while she’s soaking up your white hot mess.
“Aww, well that’s too bad. Couldn’t hold it at the first go. Shame on you,” mutters Karina, grinning and letting out a soft pitiful laugh.
“You’re fucking insane.”
“And what are you gonna do about it?” she asks, patting your ass in comfort. She massages her tits right in front of you, the webbing of cum spread across the inner parts of her mounds, in the gap of the heavy curves. “I can’t believe you- God, you came so fucking much.”
You keep on staring while you’re fighting for the last bits of consciousness left - like if you hit the canvas in a boxing match, and your coach helped you up with counting: one, two, three, four, up, up, up, up; you’ll try to focus on the breathing, take your time, continue to blink while the rest of the world fades out from your vision and all that’s there in the middle is Karina’s sluttiest form fully culminated. That’s all you see: the right angles and curves of her breasts, well sculpted and detailed that you’ll keep observing in reverence. It’s so much to process, the first glance at the scene of the crime, all over Karina, unreal and cute and just- perfect. You’re not dreaming, the nerves in your body overloaded with stimulation to properly conclude that Karina was purely made as a vessel to take limitless loads of cum in and all over her outright beautiful body.
“Well-” You sigh heavily, a weight lifted off your shoulders. “I’m kinda- ugh. Yeah.”
But Karina still has you on the palms of her hands, deciding what’s enough on her terms.
Because one second later, she spreads your legs more and slides her tongue up from your balls and upwards against the underside, then to the tip. She giggles at the feeling of you snapping to attention from the contact, and you sharply inhale at the sensation, ready for more.
“You should know that you have to deal with me the right way,” adds Karina. “This was just the start.” She then glances down to her fingertips, picking up the cum smeared all over her chest and licks it up, eyes fixated on you with interest while alternating the treatment of her lips to her fingers, to your cock. “Still speechless about my performance?”
You roll your eyes, flaring your nostrils. “Do you do this with every guy you get in bed with?”
Karina laughs at that, batting her lashes. “Not really. But if you’re gonna shut me up, make sure it’s with your cock.”
Her brows light up in excitement when rake your fingers into her hair, pull her back, at the point where she surprisingly gasps. You flick her hand away from your cock, notice her mouth drop lower, expecting you to do as she says: plug one hole up for the time being.
You don’t do that, though. Your mouth finds hers and it fills the space for the moment.
A moment where the intimacy reaches the sweetest. In all the right ways, you’re defying her wishes through actions rather than words. Karina forces a high-pitched hum down your throat, clashing her teeth into your face, catching your lip in the midst, pulling. You’re sure she wants to see you hurt - she’s already done that - two can play at that game.
Your hands slot themselves at the slides of her face, gripping, eager mouth keeping you focused on the task at hand, and it’s second nature when her arms wrap around your neck, lifting her up from the floor. She won’t stop giggling, laughing; the noises a spell of their own, cursing you - an unsaid promise that you’ll give to her even when you’re flipping her around back on the mattress.
The weight of you two creaks the springs when Karina rolls herself over and finds herself on top of you. You feel her slick folds glide up your leg, the stickiness mixing in with your skin and tainting. Her conquest doesn’t stop there, until she settles the heat over your cock, grinding, the ache alone enough to make you writhe in wanting.
She flips her head over to one side, breaking the kiss, falling back down for more. Her eyes and yours are both out of focus, panting heavily. She’s fucking unbelievable, a red herring that you had all the wrong ideas for, finally seeing the truest form of her nature being awakened.
You say something remotely close to your thoughts.
She looks at you, astounded.
Sighs.
You feel her hand cradle your head tenderly.
Meets your forehead with hers and smiles.
Tracing a finger to your jaw, pinching the skin soothingly.
“You’re going to ruin me,” Karina whispers, kissing your cheek. “I hoped it was you to be the last one I try my luck with.”
You close your eyes because it’s the truth.
Your hand shoots up for the headboard behind you, gripping. She helps grab the other arm and pins them together, captures your lips once more and it’s too intoxicating to fight against. She continues to grind her hips against yours, feel the heat of her cunt and her folds glide above you.
The teasing is insufferable, feeling her warmth wash you over.
“I’ve waited long enough.”
The words are at the tip of your tongue, but they won’t come out.
“I’ve always wanted it to be you,” she carries on, softly laughing as you’re crumbling underneath her weight. “And now, you- and this cock, is mine. Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.”
She dips your cock in, sinking, slowly, the inches getting swallowed up in increments. You moan in response, kissing her collarbone. You’ve imagined what it would be like, prayed that one day you’d get the glorious chance to be inside this wonderful heat. It’s something else, like a long reward that you’ve sought out for but it's the fact that Karina’s tight cunt is practically making you choke where you could die and be happy with it.
“Jesus fuck,” you groan, the fibers in your body tensing. She just sighs, hoists her hips up, and sinks back down again.
She does it again - and again, and again. The movement alone; painstakingly slow and increasing with every passing second. Her hips seizing yours in place and fucking you like that’s all she’s meant for; like this opportunity was a once-in-a-lifetime moment and she’s going to take every advantage of it. As if she feared you telling her to forget everything about tonight and move on like it’s normal.
“It’s not even fair, the way you make me feel,” sighs Karina, yielding to the pleasure, head dipping down. “I should’ve known - fuck, I really should’ve known. Why didn’t we do this sooner?”
Your hips match hers in a dance, unable to answer. Unwilling to, actually.
Because you’d rather save the words for later and live in the present, her body consuming you at a rate that shouldn’t be humanly possible. The way she rides on top of you, head and shoulders and arms invading every corner of your being, reigning fire. It’s so fucking good - her cunt, the warmth, the feeling, it’s impossible to think straight and there’s a part of you in the corner of your mind that’s jumping for joy. Walls tearing down from within, freeing you.
If you’re not careful, it’ll be even worse when you’re guzzling your cum into her tight pussy before she even has had the chance to fuck your cock properly. She’s holding you hostage, bounding your hands with hers - a beautiful punishment to undertake. The moans and sighs alternate, complimenting one another as she continues to jut her hips forward and back - back and forward. “I hate you,” she’s saying, “I hate how you had the fucking guts to not let me try.”
God, it really is pathetic for you. Karina figuratively digging her fingers into every nook and cranny of your brain, making you want - want to lose it, to be desperate, to be the version of you that’s capable enough to go beat-for-beat with her. The groove of your index and thumb settle at her waist, picking up the pace, use the drag of her cunt across your cock, but Karina grasps your jaw, mouthing an ‘ah, ah, ah’ as a consequence for your eagerness.
Slamming her ass back down, she chokes an utterance out of you, “Fucking- Karina-”
And Karina hums, letting her lower half do the work. “What’s wrong?” she asks, all innocent and sweet that doesn’t cover her sinful act. Perfectly calculated in her head of how she’s working you up. “What are you gonna do? Fuck me?”
She took the words right out of your mouth.
She finally managed to break you.
You’re not nice about it, either: breaking the little restraint from her hands, hooking your arms underneath her shoulders, turn her over and yank her hips back to yours.
The gasps. You want more.
Karina tests the waters again when she breaks free from your grasp, forcing you to push her down on the mattress by the head, claw your fingers into her scalp, raise her up to flush her waist and hold her mouth open, taking account of the newly formed arch in her back - the perfect fucking bell curve.
She sighs again. Not in shock, no. In relief. Satisfied, ecstatic, excited, as if she’s finally getting what she wants - for you to have enough and put her in her place. “God, yes. Fuck yes. Fucking do it. Do it! C’mon-”
You slip yourself inside and shut her up for a second, feel her walls clamp around your throbbing member. “Like this?” You ask, snarling into her ear cuff, pulling her by the hair where she won’t even complain about the pain. “Want me to be like this with you from now on?”
“You have no idea,” Karina says, nodding frantically, the arch of her hips moving backward against you. “How much I needed this from you.”
Pushing your buttons and limits is what she does best.
So you grab her by the throat, give a sloppy placement of your mouth at the corner of her lips, forcing her to look up and back. The angle where your cock is embedded rips her apart at the first slam. You’re going to fuck her. You’re going to fuck her ruthlessly. Fuck her cunt so bad like you’ve always wanted to the day she accidentally flashed herself at you and the image of her figure burned into your memory.
She keens when you bottom out completely, filling her up to the brim with your cock. Stokes coming along easier and easier as the claps of skin start to reverberate around the walls of your bedroom - thrusting up into her cunt and not giving a fuck about the rest.
Karina tugs at your hair, finding a place to hold herself together, hips stilling and moving and eventually freezing. You’re up to the plate now, dishing out the real work far better than her.
You are going to break her. Pound her ass. Bounce her cunt all over your dick, listen to how her breaths shudder and choke in the stale air with every upstroke. Your mind is working double time - trying to figure out how much she can take, where are her sensitive spots and capitalize on the weak points.
The hints are in her body, you take that into account. She takes in every inch with her cunt, eyes fluttering shut, sighing in complete adoration. Willing to let you pour every ounce of your being onto her; these feelings, these frustrations. A place where you can let your imaginations run wild, her body a sacred temple built to ruin, in all of the harmonious sounds that come out of her mouth, occasional screams to let you know what you’re doing is right.
When she cradles the side of your head again, staring forward at the mirror placed behind your bed along the wall, she grins, watching you place a kiss along her throat, leaning her head back to deepen the angle, runs a hand over yours, treating itself to one of her tits. “Baby, you can never have enough of me.”
That earns her a firm grasp of your arms, pulling her closer. She shouldn’t even be able to speak, let alone have this much fun. You push her down back on the bed, hands sliding down her waist, stopping at the indent of her hips, dragging your cock out and yanking her ass back in. “Do you ever fuck your girls like this?”
“Are you always this talkative during sex?”
“Not exactly,” her breath hitches when you bend over the swell of her ass, swipe your finger above her clit to tease. “I’m eager- ah, eager to see,” she bites down her moan when you spread her sopping pussy lips apart, feel her leak even more on your cock, “how far you’d go-”
You’re getting there, that’s for sure.
Now you’re wondering what else you can do with her hips up and knees spread wide.
“Stay right there,” you say, pressing a hand down her spine to deepen the arch, her ass getting bigger at your waist, palm full of fine skin, “and let’s see.”
Her fast shriek registers a second after you smack the surface, the sound mimicking the crack of lightning.
You slap her ass, impale yourself back in, watch as your cock disappears from your view.
Karina’s face dives into the sheets, muffling her scream.
“Big mistake,” you growl, seeking your fingers into the roots of her hair, snatching. You spank her again.
And again.
And again.
The punishment and reward: you smack her ass, fuck into her, feel her body blossom with heat and flushed with crimson; handfuls of sheets or pillows or anything that’s within reach. Her cunt gushes even more, the throaty moans hiccuping as her body convulses more because of the blowback, and she’s still smiling.
“God- oh my God,” Karina pants, fingers back between her legs as she throws her ass back now, completing the motion. “So forceful.”
You cup the sides of her waist, press your fingers over the blotches of red, skin rippling each passing second your hips flush with hers. The sounds of the smacks and the gentle creaks of the bed are already erotic enough that the spanking in between is just the cherry on top.
All that Karina has to do in this situation is to simply ride out the wave of pleasure, body slightly jaded through every firm impact of your cock weaving itself inside her cunt, the vice closing in every millisecond.
“-so good. You’re so good,” spits Karina, eyes cinched shut; a sharp inhale when you reach that spot, body seizing. “K-keep using my cunt, just like that- wanna feel your dick ruck up inside-”
You’re grasping at her neck, deepening the angle. You want to melt into her, to feel everything. To fill her mind up with nothing but just you.
“You did this to me,” you grit, pulling her back on your cock; listen to her stutters for an answer. “This is all on you.”
But she giggles, head swiveling forward and face first into the pillows, but her wailing still breaks through. She comes back up for air soon after. Whatever she can get, “The plan, baby,” she’s telling you, “It was all part of the plan. Always.”
That twists your mind in more ways than one. Her mouth, her hands, her body, all within arm's reach. You grasp at her tit again, drive your cock back into her cunt, her moans inching up an octave, and the shimmer coming out of the corner of Karina’s eye gives you all the more reason to keep going.
“I’ll break you until you’ve had enough,” she breathes out, and her face contorts to something remotely pained, “please, for the love of fuck- don’t stop bouncing my pussy on your- fuck!”
It hits you when you’ve finally worked Karina to stop talking. Breathless. Heaving. You sigh out of rapture, the feeling washing over you like you got dunked in water. A new enlightenment fully realized - the full manifestation of her creation, and now she’s on the receiving end of it.
You give her two more firm strokes inside her; drag yourself out and rub your tip over her folds. She wiggles her ass in response, tempting you. Having another fill as her cunt clenches your cock once more, slick soaking up your skin until the friction is almost seamless, siphoning every part of your being just for her.
This angle is dangerous: the way her stomach is nearly flat, you find your bearings above her, pushing in, too deep, holding her by the hips, anchoring, knees apart and at an angle where they would be if she was kneeling on a pew. Instead, you grab one leg, then the other - get your palms full of her waist in supplication as the undersides of the peak of her thighs meet yours, curves rippling on impact, thrust your cock into her open cunt where you’re rubbing all of the spots at once, gliding in so easily where the pace alone really sets itself into place. Her hand tends to one of her tits, hopelessly keeping it in place while you’re hooking her back for that arch and cementing the motion as your own. The time of teasing and playfulness is over, as you’re chasing to make the aches in her body a problem and sever all the nerves in her system until you can visibly see her limbs shudder - fuck out a complaint from her lips to make you stop and not act so greedy about it; but then your mouth is back on her again, hoping to sedate her thoughts as you let your lower half keep up the work.
Then you sigh something between the space of the lips, an undertone: “You like this, love?”
A nod is the only response she can give you, mouth parted and unable to coherently say anything in particular, so grab her chin.
She’s getting there. You know. You can tell.
“This pretty little cunt, all for me, no?”
Karina mouths a ‘fuck’, biting her lip immediately after.
“I’ll use you in whatever way I want.”
Her hand swoops over and presses your forehead against hers, whining in pure euphoria.
“Let me hear you,” you urge, hand moving up so you can close her mouth, lighten up on the pressure so that she speaks a bit more freely. “I want you to say it.”
Karina locks onto your eyes, searching for the right words in your head, and you know she will-
Because Karina knows that she’ll be good for you. Your perfect little fucktoy. A personal slut who’ll always let you have and you know this well enough since it’s taken you this long to finally see it. “Oh baby it’s all yours, it’s all yours, it’s all yours. I promise- I promise that it’s all yours and it’s no one else’s- I promise it’s only yours just keep fucking-”
To say that your ego was inflated would be an understatement. But man, words can not describe how much you wanted her to scream it out at the top of her lungs.
Your groaning matches hers in volume, the bedframe not too far off to scrape across the hardwood. You’re pretty sure that the springs will bounce along with your bodies as well.
“So pretty,” you praise, kissing her. “I’m gonna have this cunt all to myself. Whenever. Wherever-”
Karina’s head lolls back and up, clutching onto your neck for added support. Heaving as you’re fucking the air out of her and makes her voice have this raspy tone attached to it: “That’s cute. You won’t have to look very far now that there’ll be one room for us to share.”
You pause, blinking. Your finger moves a wisp of her hair away from her face, her eyes widening and fulll with sparkles. Never in a million years, you’d find yourself to be in this position - inside of Karina - but here we are. No need to move fast when you’ve done the hard stuff already.
“So what,” you say, picking up a stable pace in her cunt, saving the dissipating control where you can. What’s there to be left said when it’s already shown? “It’s bad news for you because I’m gonna have you every chance I can get.”
“You wanna let the whole world know how rough you’re fucking me? Be my guest,” she tells you, palm braced to your waist and moving her hips in this body-roll motion, biting her lip as the entity of sin returns in her mind, taking over.
“I’m too good for you,” continues Karina, light-hearted and giddy, as if she’s not trying to milk every bit of you into her fucking pussy. “And here I thought I knew everything about you.”
She’s right about that. Fortunately, this is more than just a dream. This is reality. You have endless memories with her as it is, and you’re positive that you’re excited to create more of them with her.
“I guess you could say this is one more secret kept away.”
A hand to your face, gentle. Loving. “My handsome boy.”
“Fuck you.”
“You are.” Karina breathes with an airy laugh, voice getting hazier. Cock drunk and fucked out of her mind. It’s working. “So hot.”
“Gonna talk?”
“Fuck-” she then sighs, hissing, and the smirk fades from her face, something more warm, languid, laid back. Her mind is gone. “Fuck.”
You nod and give her a smirk of approval. Proud of your latest curation. The girl that everyone wants, only wants you. The beauty in that exclusivity lifts a weight off your head, and you’re far inclined to accept it head-on.
“How bad do you want me?” You ask, biting down a kiss to push some life into her. Tears welled up at the corners, letting her feel every inch where you could take it.
“I should be asking you, how far are you gonna hold out for me?” Karina purrs. “I’ll give you what you want if you let go first.” She tells you, pulling her body upwards and shifting the limbs around before you find yourself sliding back into her where the angle is at her cunt’s hottest point. A spot where you’d never turn back on.
The pressing of the crease at her knees, legs pushed up high. Your cock is so embedded and consumed by her pussy that you’re having trouble staying upright.
She then says this mantra - a phrase said differently but its message is very clear: “I’m all yours,” she wails, “I’ll always be yours if you let me- fuck! Only let me have this cock all to myself.”
It’s happened multiple times before in your life: being wrapped around her finger. But this- this takes the meaning to a whole new level. Her body claims you as its own and you’ll surrender to that discovery for as long as you walk on this earth.
The strokes keep going, the mindnumbing sensation coming to its fated end - that blissful release and last bits of pent-up feelings of Karina; her cunt a glove, sheathing your cock perfectly with every thrust, clenching around your girth to pump you out.
You’ve already laid the cards on the table a long time ago or- even now, when she’s seen you in the most vulnerable state, fucking into the mattress so deeply and loudly that you’re not even worried about the potential noise complaint coming from the neighbors.
She’s calling out your name. Just your name. Nobody else’s. Telling you how to keep fucking her. Hard. Fuck her poor little cunt until you’ve dumped every last bit of your load in her and fill her until she’s leaking out white between her legs.
“Baby, I can feel you throbbing. Are you gonna cum? Gonna cum so fucking much- Please, I want it. I need it. Just- fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck-”
She loses first.
And my lord, she’s fucking wrecked.
You bottom her out and hold her hips in place, cunt quivering and her toes curl and feet in the air, moving with what little mobility they have left because you’re pressing down the underside of her thighs, yelping and wailing and screaming to the point she might break the fucking glass on mirror and windows.
“Baby. Baby, I can’t fucking move- you son of a bi-”
Karina’s pussy squelches around your cock, a new layer of slick added to the mix of spit and precum. You pull out halfway and rub her clit at an inhuman rate, feel her liquid sputter out, hit some parts of your body, squirting.
She’s squirting even more when you’re slapping the head of your cock across her pussy lips, watch her body spazz out and tense up almost like she’s having a seizure or going into shock, blabbering complete nonsense and you’re kissing her harshly on the fine column of her throat.
You could care less, because all you just want to do is fuck Karina, feel the glide of her cunt become even smoother than before. Read into how her body responds to yours and the mess just gets even more filthier. The sounds- God, the fucking sounds. It’s a perfect harmony.
The pace steadies with the beat of your heart, thrusting your cock into her cunt and keep her figure moving until she’s able to gather her thoughts, finding the right words along the teeth to where she says: “cum in me, fuck your cum into me,” and the sobs compliments her heaving. “Please, I want it. Give it to me. I wanna be full-”
It lights a fire under your ass, every ounce of your being finally collapsing.
You’re managing where you can; burying yourself in the deepest depth of Karina’s pussy, cumming in the hottest point - and the senses and nerves in your body are contracting and expanding in all the right places-
Your body and Karina’s: finally becoming one.
Your cock and lips are the sole sources of connection to her as she coos at the multitudes of cum filling her pussy up.
The embodiment of perfection. The tightness. So snug. You can feel it. Every fiber of your being let out through your release and her small little hole - holding your cock through the pulsing, legs frozen as your arms slither to Karina’s back, exhaling so hard that you’re certain one of your lungs might break.
“That’s fucking amazing, baby. Oh, baby, keep giving me your cum - I need- I need it, ah. God-”
You could feel your vision start to blur in and out of blackness, her whimpers and soft moans a gentle sonata, soothing through your high as her fingers grazing across your skin is enough contact to course electricity through you. And you rest your head against hers, taking asylum in the space above her shoulder, hips slowing and breath racked with exhaustion. Her hand rubs against your lower back, massaging the last bits of cum deep while the rest of her body goes limp, sweat glistening all over her skin as if she got baptized, finally blessed with the afterglow.
“So much cum,” she’s saying, over and over, a prayer in itself, “There’s so much cum in me.”
You release the restraints of your hands from her body, pulling on her side until her legs start to tangle with yours, cock still wrapped around her pussy, unable to leave or pull out. Her thumb swipes across your eyebrow, tapping the temple. Internalizing the events that occurred just now, reeling away from the pure emotions and the mere point of it all.
At last, you and her are both drained. Like you’ve gone twelve rounds with her. You’re willing to go one more, because she’ll want that too.
You’re then combing Karina’s hair down, patting the back of her head while she leans into your chest cavity and showers your collarbones with kisses. She nestles her face deeper when you bring her closer, swooping the sheets from beneath until it covers both of you.
It’s comforting. This new home.
It’s everything.
“Don’t sleep yet,” you whisper to her, kissing her forehead while her eyelids flutter lazily.
Her head tilts. There’s a slight shake on the ends of her fingertips; she brings them close to her face. You gaze down to see her mouth try to form a few letters - a word - only say nothing at the end of it.
“It was always you,” she breathes, the projection alone a new belief to instill. Your face shifts to something confused, thrown off. But you’ve repeated and reciprocated the same thing even though most of it was unrequited. “Part of me was worried for like- the longest time, and now-”
You hush her, her body sinking more into your touch, the warmth encapsulating her like a cocoon. The aches soon settle in and you let the pillowed conversations flow to a more interesting topic.
–
When the next morning comes around, your mind is doing its best job to make you succumb to the inner machinations of your visions. The effects of the alcohol still present - which explains the partial dizziness, though your memory is kept intact. Most of it feels a bit smudged, like the faint image of a mirage of some haven out in the blistering heat of the desert. Soon your eyes are filled with the endless plane of the ceiling above, and you feel a whole lot lighter-
The weight pressing down on your arm was no more.
You arch your back, feel the limited mobility in your lower half, and inhale deeply.
A prop of your elbow betters your view; realizing the sheets were off your body, your legs slightly spread apart, feel the shocking tingle of nails scratch along your skin, crotch surprisingly warm - not to mention wet.
Karina looks up with a neat pop off the head of your cock, an airy laugh passing through her lips, slides her tongue up the length before she carries on with bobbing her head between your legs, cock hardening in the heat of her mouth.
“Jesus fuck-”
You feel her hand wrap around you, grinning, biting down a patch of skin near the base. She pumps you once, maybe twice, and tilts her face sideways when she sees your jaw slack and lips salivating.
Well. It's one hell of a way to say good morning.
“Aw, did I scare you? Well, you better enjoy this because I won’t be waking you up like this unless I feel like it.”
That’s how all things go, unfortunately. The ways Karina wants you to do these favors of hers.
Except now-
You can bet your ass that you’ll love every fucking second of it.
#kpop smut#aespa karina smut#aespa smut#karina smut#aespa karina#kpop fanfic#karina x male reader#male reader smut
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
#some like it hot#meta <- a lot of people have been reblogging my additions with these tags and for anyone who sees this I'd like to politely ask you to stop.
The addition above is not meta, because this is not a fandom post. It's critical media analysis. And while it's not very in-depth, that is still what it is. It's based in more nuanced, better-researched academic media criticism and queer studies than the superficial summary it is, but nevertheless, it's critical analysis, not meta.
I fully support fandom, don't get me wrong! But it's also possible to appreciate a piece of media without participating in fandom. Meta is a fandom-based form of analysis, and fandom's basis is a shared love for a piece of media. Critical analysis can also be inspired by love or appreciation for something, but its purpose is to look at a piece of media from an impartial perspective.
Like I said, I fully support fandom. And I also get that this site is fandom central. But being on tumblr also makes me feel like fandom is sometimes an overwhelming and overbearing entity that pushes other forms of engaging with media to the sidelines to the point where they're starting to become overlooked or forgotten, especially as someone who works in media, studied media crit, and doesn't participate in fandom.
It's important to be able to observe and critique media impartially. Fandom is inevitably biased, and that's fine for fandom, that's what it's there for! But it's so so important to also be able to understand, analyze, and deconstruct a piece of media without that bias, in order to understand its message, the effectiveness of how that message is conveyed, and the tools used to construct it.
I know people often use tags to organize posts on their feed for easy reference, but I have to admit, every time I see in my notes that someone's tagged this post as "meta" I die a little inside. Fandom isn't the only way to look at media.
Some Like It Hot (1959) dir. Billy Wilder
#I don't maybe I'm also uncomfortable with this thing I see where fandom becomes an identity and I feel like the 'meta' tag is#assigning me an identity I don't have for myself?#and look I don't really hang out in any fandoms so I don't want to venture out of my lane or anything#but if fandom and fanfic have this close link then I cannot understand for the life of me why there isn't more critical analysis#if your goal is to write about your favorite piece of media wouldn't it be important to that process to be able to deconstruct it#and understand what makes it so compelling to you?#why is meta such a prevalent thing but analysis isn't?
8K notes
·
View notes
Text
06 | ANOTHER SUFFOCATING DAY
m.list | prev | next
The sharp cool air bit at your cheeks as you walked down the streets of Gotham, the din of the city surrounding you. People rushed past, bundled up and hurried, but you barely noticed. Your thoughts were too loud, replaying the awkward lunch with Barbara.
And Dick.
You knew they planned it. It wasn’t a coincidence. Dick showing up just as Barbara tried to soften you up? His concerned eyes, his cautious tone, the way he leaned forward every time he spoke—as if proximity could somehow mend what was broken. It was calculated. All of it.
You didn’t hate them for trying. But you couldn’t sit there and let them pick at the wound they’d left in you.
The moment Dick started talking about “your life” and how “you both haven’t spent some time together”, you felt your chest tighten, the coffee in front of you suddenly too bitter to swallow. You hadn’t meant to leave so quickly. But the words had stuck in your throat, choking you. You made some excuse about having plans and got out of there as fast as you could without outright running.
It wasn’t a lie. You did have plans. Caitlyn and Adrien were meeting you at the library later. But “later” was still a few hours away. You could’ve stayed and talked to them. You could’ve let them say whatever it was they needed to say.
But you couldn’t do it.
Why couldn’t you?
The question burned in your mind, eating away at the edge of your thoughts. You didn’t understand it entirely. Sure, you had expected to feel awkward seeing them again after all this time, maybe a little angry. That much made sense. But what you felt in there was something else entirely. Something heavier. Sharper.
It was like a storm had cracked open inside of you, filling your veins with rage and grief that didn’t belong to you.
It didn’t feel like you. No, that wasn’t right.
It did belong to you—it just wasn’t yours anymore. It belonged to someone you used to be, someone you thought you’d left behind.
Sixteen year old you.
That version of you, when your father had been lost in the timestream—presumed dead—and the weight of Gotham’s shadow had fallen heavier on your shoulders. On everyone’s shoulders. When you threw yourself into every mission and patrol, desperate to prove yourself. To prove to everyone else that you were useful—that you could help. The one that was benched and replaced, the one who’d walked away with more bruises inside than out… that’s what you’d felt.
Your older self had moved on—or at least you thought you had. You weren’t that angry, reckless kid anymore. You’d told yourself you understood why Dick and Barbara did what they did, even if it hurt. You had buried whatever sort of negative emotions you felt back then. You’d told yourself you forgave them. Because they meant well.
They only did what they thought was right at the moment.
But sitting across from them just moments ago, seeing their faces, hearing their voices—it all came rushing back. The raw, unfiltered pain. The bitterness you thought you’d buried. The feeling of being left behind by them.
And it wasn’t fair. Not to them, and not to you either. But it was there, clawing at your chest, screaming for attention.
None of this matters, you told yourself.
It shouldn’t matter.
Not now. Not anymore.
You weren’t sixteen. You weren’t the same girl who needed their validation to feel whole.
So why was that old pain refusing to go away? Why was it still clawing at your chest like it was desperate to be heard?
Was it because you were back in this time? Back to when the wounds were still fresh, when everything was falling apart?
The ache throbbed like a second heartbeat, making you grit your teeth.
You exhaled sharply, willing yourself to focus. None of this would matter in a few hours when you were with Caitlyn and Adrien. For now, you just needed to clear your head.
As you walked, your mind wandered aimlessly through the noise of Gotham’s streets. You were too wrapped up in your thoughts to notice much—the chaotic honking of cabs, the sharp clatter of hurried pedestrians, or the faint scent of roasted nuts from a street vendor. Everything was muffled, distant, like the city itself was trying to fade into the background.
That’s why the sudden impact took you completely off guard.
“Whoa!”
The force slammed into your side, nearly knocking you off balance. You staggered a step, your boots scraping against the pavement as you barely managed to steady yourself.
Blinking, you looked down to see a small figure sprawled on the sidewalk.
“Hey, you okay?” you asked, your voice softening as you knelt down to check on the kid.
The kid on the ground, no older than nine you think, was rubbing his back, wincing. His round face scrunched up, his wide brown eyes framed by impossibly long lashes, blinked up at you.
“Yeah,” he muttered, looking up at you. “Sorry. I wasn’t looking.”
You sighed, offering him a hand. “No, it’s okay. You just caught me off guard. You sure you’re not hurt?”
He hesitated for a moment before nodding, though his wince when he tried to stand made you narrow your eyes. That’s when you noticed it—a scrape on his shin, the fabric of his pants slightly torn. A thin trail of blood trickled down his pale skin, standing out starkly in the cold light of the afternoon.
“Hold on,” you said gently, guiding him to a nearby bench. “Sit here for a second, okay?”
The kid obeyed, his small legs swinging idly as they dangled above the sidewalk.
“I’ll be right back,” you promised, already heading towards the convenience store on the corner.
Inside, you quickly grabbed a small bottle of antispetic, some wipes and a pack of bandages, rushing back to where the kid sat. The boy was still swinging his legs, humming softly to himself as he traced the patterns on the bench.
“Okay,” you said, kneeling in front of him again. “This might sting a little.”
The boy just shrugged. “It’s fine. I’m used to it.”
You arched an eyebrow but didn’t comment. As carefully as you could, you wiped the scrape clean, dabbing at the blood with gentle precision. He flinched only once, biting his lips to keep from making a sound, but his tiny hands gripped the edge of the bench tightly.
“There,” you said after pressing a bandage over the wound. You patted his knee lightly and smiled. “Good as new.”
The boy tilted his head to look at his leg, then back at you. His big brown eyes practically sparkled with wonder. “Thanks! You didn’t have to do that.”
“Sure, I did, you replied, leaning back on your heels. “It was my fault you fell and scraped your knee, after all.”
He giggled, a soft, bubbly sound that melted through the cold air. “It wasn’t your fault! I wasn’t watching where I was going. I was running.”
“Running, huh?” you asked, tilting your head. “Why the rush?”
He puffed out his chest a little, trying to act tought almost. “I like running! It makes me feel like a superhero!”
The earnestness in his voice made you chuckle. “A superhero, huh? Well, superheroes need to be careful too, you know. Especially in Gotham. You don’t want to go running into the wrong kind of person.”
“I won’t!” he promised, his little hand lifting as if he were making a vow. “I will run really fast, so no one can catch me!”
“Good plan,” you said, giving him an approving nod.
He kicked his legs again, glancing around the bustling street. “My name’s Elliot, by the way.”
“Nice to meet you, Elliot. I’m (Name).”
“Nice to meet you too!”
He tilted his head, studying you with a curious look. “You’re really nice. Are you from around here?”
“Yeah. I live nearby.”
You studied him for a moment, his small frame dwarfed by the oversized coat he was wearing. “What about you?”
“I live at the orphanage,” he said simply, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
The casualness of his tone tugged at your chest. “The one down the street?”
“Yeah.”
There was no sadness in his voice, no hesitation. Just a simple fact.
“How long have you been there?” you asked, leaning back slightly.
He shrugged. “I dunno. A while, I guess. I don’t really remember anything else.”
The weight of his words settled over you, heavy and uncomfortable. The casual way he said it made something twist in your chest. You cleared your throat. “Well, you should be more careful running around out here. Gotham’s not exactly the friendliest city, you know.”
He nodded earnestly at your words.
“Just don’t go running into any supervillains, okay?”
He giggled. “Okay!”
Satisfied that he was okay, you stood and brushed off your jeans. “All right, kid. You’re good to go. Take care of yourself.”
“Okay! Bye, (Name)! Thanks again!” he said, hopping off the bench.
You watched as Elliot disappeared into the crowd, his small figure weaving through the bustling pedestrains with ease. The city swallowed him up in seconds, his bright energy and carefree smile lingering only in your memory.
And then all of a sudden…. something hit you.
Flashes. Sharp and sudden, like a flood of images pouring into your brain.
You saw Elliot. But not on the street. He was in a dimly lit room, his wide eyes filled with fear. Shadows moved around him—figures closing in. You heard muffled cries, the sound of something heavy scraping against the floor.
And then it was gone.
You gasped sharply, your breath catching in your throat, as you clutched the back of the bench for support. The world tilted for a moment before steadying again, but the ache in your chest hadn’t left.
“What the hell was that?” you muttered, your voice trembling.
You glanced back toward the spot where Elliot had disappeared, your pulse racing. The flashes still lingered in your mind like afterimages, vivid and unshakable. You could still feel the weight of his fear, the sharp edges of the shadows closing in on him.
It felt real. Too real.
But it couldn’t be.
Could it?
Your chest tightened as you wrestled with the questions clawing their way to the surface. What was that? A vision? A hallucination? You’d never experienced anything like that before. There was no warning, no explanation to what you just experienced, just those flashes of something you couldn’t comprehend.
Your gaze darted over the crowded street, searching for the small boy, but he was long gone. A part of you wanted to chase after him, to grab his hand and demand answers—even if you weren’t sure what those answers could possibly be. Another part of you felt frozen, stuck in the swirling chaos of your own thought.
Even if you did catch up to Elliot, would he be able to give you the explanation you needed? From the looks of it, the kid seemed fine. He looked content with where he was, content with his life. Nothing seemed amiss.
Nothing…?
No. There was something amiss.
His clothes.
They weren’t in terrible shape, but they were clearly old—faded fabric, a few loose threads, and patches in places that made it clear they weren’t new. Passed down. Not what you’d expect from a child living in an orphanage funded by Wayne Enterprises’ charity foundations.
Your father’s charity had strict guidelines. Proper care, sufficient resources, and decent clothing for all the kids under its wing. That much you knew. Elliot’s oversized coat and scuffed shoes didn’t fit that picture.
But that wasn’t proof. You had no solid foundation for your suspicions—just flashes of fear and shadows that may not have even been real. For all you knew, it was nothing. Your mind could have been playing tricks on you, filling in blanks that didn’t exist.
Still, the thought gnawed at you, refusing to let go. There was more to this. There had to be. And you knew it. You had to check this out. You had to investigate this—
But then came the reminder: you weren’t Batgirl anymore.
You clenched your jaw at the thought. You’d quit that life, stepped away from the vigilante world and everything that came with it. You’d promised yourself that you wouldn’t go back—not for anyone, not for any reason.
But what if there was something deeper here? What if those flashes were real, not some random trick of your mind? You couldn’t ignore it. Not completely.
A sigh slipped past your lips as the internal battle raged on. Investigate? No, that wasn’t who you were anymore. And yet, you couldn’t just let it go.
For now, there was only one thing you could do without crossing the line you’d set for yourself: check out the orphanage in the Batcomputer’s database. If there was something wrong, there’d be records—staff changes, supply reports, funding discrepancies. Something that could confirm or deny the flicker of unease twisting in your chest.
You’d start there. That much, at least, was safe.
You had other plans with Caitlyn and Adrien. Whatever this was, it would have to wait until later.
…..
Damnit. You couldn’t wait. This couldn’t wait.
With that, you turned to head towards the orphanage down the street. You had to see with your own eyes that Elliot was okay. That what you experienced was a figment of your fucked up imagination.
The orphanage loomed ahead as you walked down the street, its iron gates standing tall, though not imposing. A modest building of faded red brick with large, neatly trimmed hedges lining its perimeter, it seemed well-maintained. The kind of place that didn’t scream luxury but gave the impression of care.
You hesitated just outside the gate, your fingers curling around the cold metal bars as you peered inside. The soft sound of laughter drifted through the crisp air, and you spotted a handful of kids running around in the garden. A boy and girl were tossing a ball back and forth while another group of kids crouched near a flowerbed, clearly engaged in some secretive game.
And then you saw him.
Elliot.
He was in the middle of the yard, darting between two other kids as they played an energetic game of tag. His oversized coat flapped as he ran, his laughter echoing through the space. His carefree smile, his bright energy—it was a relief to see.
You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding.
He was fine. He looked fine. And so did the rest of the kids.
Maybe you were imagining things after all. Lack of sleep? Stress? Yeah, probably. The flashes you’d seen earlier couldn’t have been real. There was no sign of fear here, no shadows closing in. Just kids being kids, carefree and safe.
Still, you couldn’t shake the unease simmering in your chest. The orphanage itself didn’t give off any bad vibes. The garden was tidy, the kids seemed happy, and the building looked well-maintained. But something about it all still felt off.
You leaned against the gate, lost in thought. Was it guilt? Anxiety? Or was there actually something here you were missing?
“Can I help you?”
The sudden voice startled you, making you flinch.
Your eyes snapped up, landing on an older woman standing just beyond the gate. She was thin, with silver hair neatly pinned back, and she wore a pale green cardigan over a plain blouse. Her sharp, gray eyes studied you with polite curiosity.
“Oh, uh…” you stammered, stepping back from the gate. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to—uh, I wasn’t—”
Her expression softened, and she offered you a small smile. “No need to apologize, dear. It’s not every day someone stops to stare at the children playing.”
You cringed internally at her words. Damn, the way she put it made you sound like a creep. But before you could say anything more, she stepped forward and gestured for you to follow. “Why don’t you come in for a cup of tea? It’s much warmer inside.”
You hesitated for a moment, glancing back at the kids before nodding.
Inside, the orphanage was cozy but simple. The hallway walls were painted a soft beige, and framed pictures of smiling children lined the space. The faint scent of lavender lingered in the air, mixing with the aroma of freshly brewed tea.
The woman led you into a small sitting room with worn but comfortable-looking furniture. A sturdy wooden table sat in the center, and on it was a tray with a teapot and two mismatched cups.
“Please, sit,” she said, gesturing to one of the chairs as she poured tea into the cups. “I’m Mrs. Cole, the warden here. And you are?”
You introduced yourself, feeling a bit awkward under her steady gaze.
“So,” she said, handing you a cup before settling into her own chair. “What brings you here today?”
You hesitated, your hands warming against the cup’s surface as you searched for the right words. “I, uh… I was just… checking on one of the kids. I bumped into him earlier on the street, and I wanted to make sure he was okay.”
Her brows lifted slightly, and then she chuckled softly. “I see. Spying on children, were you?”
The way she said it—lighthearted and without malice—made your shoulders relax, but the heat still rushed to your face. “That sounds so bad. I didn’t mean—ugh.” You groaned, cringing at your own words. “I didn’t mean to make myself seem so suspicious and creepy.”
Mrs. Cole waved a dismissive hand, a warm smile on her face. “It’s quite all right. You don’t seem the type to mean any harm. Which child was it that you were worried about?”
“His name’s Elliot,” you said, setting your cup down. “I just wanted to check in, that’s all.”
“Oh, Elliot,” she said, her tone light. “He’s a lively one, isn’t he? Always running around, full of energy.”
You nodded, watching her carefully as she took a sip of her tea. “Yeah. He seemed pretty happy.”
“Of course,” she said with a soft chuckle. “We do our best to make sure all the children feel safe and cared for. It’s not an easy task, but it’s rewarding.”
Breathing is steady.
No rapid blinking.
Stance isn’t rigid.
No notable pupil dilation either.
Either she’s telling the truth, or she’s an excellent liar.
“Has he been here long?” you asked, trying to keep your tone casual.
“Elliot? Ah, yes,” she said, setting her cup down. “His parents passed away in a car accident when he was only a few months old if I remember correctly. There was no next of kin, and he ended up in my care. He’s grown up well. A sweet boy, really. A bit of a dreamer.”
You nodded slowly, forcing a polite smile. “That’s good to hear.”
But it wasn’t. The pit in your stomach only grew. You wanted to believe her, to convince yourself that everything was fine, that you were overthinking this. But the image of Elliot’s oversized coat and scuffed shoes kept gnawing at you. And then there was that flash—the fear in his eyes, the shadows.
You glanced around the room, taking in the neat but modest surroundings. There were no obvious red flags, no signs of neglect or mistreatment. And yet… something felt glaringly wrong.
“I don’t mean to pry,” you said carefully, “but I noticed his coat seemed a bit… old. Do the kids get new clothes regularly?”
Mrs. Cole’s smile didn’t waver, but you noticed her fingers tighten ever so slightly around the handle of her cup. “We do our best with the resources we have. Of course, donations don’t always cover everything we’d like.”
“Right,” you said, keeping your tone neutral. “Well, it’s great that you’re doing so much for them. I’m sure it’s not an easy job.”
Mrs. Cole inclined her head, her smile firmly in place. “It’s a labor of love, as they say.”
You nodded, though your mind was already racing. Something about her demeanor—the way she’d hesitated when you mentioned Elliot, the overly smooth responses—set off alarm bells.
Her words sounded rehearsed, like something you’d hear at a charity gala. Polished, pleasant, but impersonal. Something in your gut twisted. You didn’t have proof—nothing concrete—but the flashes from earlier refused to leave your mind.
But maybe it was nothing. Maybe you were projecting, letting your own guilt and unresolved issues cloud your judgment. But you couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to this place than met the eye.
You finished your tea quickly, standing up and offering a polite smile. “Thanks for the tea, Mrs. Cole. I should get going.”
“Of course,” she said, rising to her feet. “It was lovely to meet you. Do stop by again if you’d like to volunteer. The children always appreciate new faces.”
You nodded, murmuring a quick goodbye as you stepped out into the cold air. The sound of laughter still drifted from the garden, but it felt distant, almost hollow.
Your mind raced as you walked away, replaying the conversation over and over. The flashes you experienced, the shadows closing in—they didn’t feel like random visions. They felt like something real, something you couldn’t ignore.
And then there was Mrs. Cole. Polite, warm, and perfectly pleasant on the surface. But there was something beneath it all, something she wasn’t saying. You were sure of it.
You glanced back at the orphanage, its brick walls bathed in the soft glow of the setting sun.
You weren’t Batgirl anymore. You weren’t a detective or a hero. But right now, none of that mattered.
Something was wrong here. You didn’t know what, but you were going to find out.
Tim stared at the coffee cup in front of him, the steam long since gone cold. The café was quiet, save for the hum of conversation and the soft clatter of cups against saucers. But his mind was loud—too loud. Gotham’s shadows seemed heavier lately, the air thicker, and even though crime rates had started to level out with Bruce’s return, Tim couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. Maybe it was just him. Bruce was back. Dick was Nightwing again. Damian was still Robin. Everyone seemed to be slipping back into their old roles, their old dynamics.
Everyone except him.
He stirred his drink absentmindedly, watching the ripples swirl and fade. Red Robin was his now, his own identity carved out of necessity. He wasn’t exactly proud of what he’d built with it, but the question lingered: what did Red Robin mean in a Gotham where everything was supposed to be falling back into place? He wanted to feel like things were normal again, but there was an unease in his chest that he couldn’t quite name. Maybe it was the way Bruce had been lately—colder, more distant, like the time apart had left cracks in the foundation of their already-fragile relationship. Maybe it was the weight of managing Wayne Enterprises on top of everything else. Or maybe it was something deeper, something he hadn’t figured out yet.
“Tim.”
The voice pulled him from his thoughts, and he looked up to see Cassie standing across from him, arms crossed and a brow raised. She tilted her head, a soft smile tugging at her lips. “Brooding even in a café. Classic Tim Drake.”
“Cassie.” he said, blinking away the fog in his head.
Tim hadn’t even noticed the time pass until Cassie slid into the seat across from him. “Did you forget the whole reason we invited you out to eat?”
Tim glanced up from his coffee. “You mean forcing me to postpone my work and dragging me out to eat?”
Cassie shrugged unapologetically. “Same thing.”
Tim sighed, already feeling the weight of the conversation that was about to unfold. He hadn’t wanted to go out, hadn’t wanted to leave his thoughts behind. But here he was, surrounded by familiar faces. The air of the café was warm, the clinking of cutlery and cups acting as a faint soundtrack to his spiraling thoughts.
Cassie leaned forward, eyes softening as she looked at him. “So, what’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing. Just the usual.” Tim tried to brush it off, shifting his gaze away. But Cassie wasn’t buying it. He felt like he was wearing his discomfort like a badge, too heavy to ignore.
“Don’t even try it. You’ve been cooped up with work, patrols, and whatever else Gotham’s been throwing at you. But this is something else. When’s the last time you got out of your own head?”
He hesitated, looking down at his cup. “I’m fine, Cassie.”
“Tim.” Her voice softened, and when he looked up, her expression was tinged with concern. “You don’t have to do that with me. What’s going on?”
Tim opened his mouth to respond, but his mind flickered to Gotham once again—its fractured streets, its shadows that felt even darker now. He leaned back in his chair, taking a long breath, trying to find the right words. “It’s Gotham. It’s everything. Bruce is back, Dick’s Nightwing, Damian’s still Robin, and I’m… Red Robin.” He let the words hang in the air, not fully knowing what to make of them. “It’s just—where do I fit in all of this? Everyone’s falling back into their roles like nothing’s changed. But I’m not sure I fit anywhere anymore.”
Cassie raised a brow, clearly sensing the deeper meaning behind his words, but she didn’t push him too hard. Instead, she tilted her head and spoke in a gentle, teasing tone. “Are you sure this is just about Gotham? Because if it’s only Gotham, that’s a lot of caffeine for someone who’s just having a ‘midlife crisis’ at, what, eighteen?”
Tim let out a half-laugh, the first hint of relief he’d felt all day. He was grateful for the distraction, but the nagging feeling at the back of his mind wouldn’t let go. Gotham was one thing, but there was more to it, something beneath the surface. He couldn’t stop thinking about how things had shifted within the family, how everything had changed after Bruce’s return. Even with Stephanie as Batgirl now, there was something unsettling about the way Bruce had leaned into her role, leaving you behind.
You.
Tim’s grip on his drink tightened.
Maybe that’s what’s been off.
You had been Batgirl, the title was yours before Bruce being lost in the timestream turned the whole family upside down. When he returned, Tim thought it would bring you relief—that it would give you the chance to be Batgirl officially again, to rebuild what had been fractured. But instead, it seemed to push you further away.
Tim wasn’t stupid. He’d noticed how Bruce had interacted with you, how he seemed to choose Stephanie over you, without even saying a word. Tim had noticed the way Bruce seemed to regard Stephanie as Batgirl more openly, more comfortably, than he ever had you. It wasn’t spoken out loud, but the difference was there, in the little things Bruce did—or didn’t do. And Tim knew better than most how much that could sting. How it could make you question whether you really had a place at all.
And that was what gnawed at him the most. He knew that feeling intimately. And unlike him, you hadn’t fought back.
No.
You had fought back.
But it hadn’t been enough. Not really.
And now, you’d chosen to step away completely. And Tim couldn’t fathom why.
That wasn’t all that had changed.
Something about your recent behavior, the way you’d started to act differently, unsettled Tim in a way he couldn’t explain. The day he’d seen you and Damian talking had only made things worse. You’d apologized to him over something. And Damian—he had actually apologized too. That alone had been jarring enough, but the way he leaned into the small pat you gave his head afterward? The way he smiled—actually smiled—when you walked away?
Tim couldn’t wrap his head around it. You and Damian, who were once at each other’s throats constantly—more him than you—were suddenly… close?
Maybe not that close. But whatever had shifted between you two, it felt monumental. And it only made Tim’s unease grow.
He couldn’t help but wonder if your connection with Damian was what solidified you decision to quit being Batgirl.
Tim hated not knowing for sure. Hated feeling you were slipping further away while he stood on the sidelines, powerless to understand why.
You had stepped away, and the world kept turning, and yet, Tim was left here wondering why he was the only one who noticed how wrong it all felt.
Why was it so easy for everyone else to move on?
Why did it feel like you were disappearing right in front of him?
And why—
Why did it bother him so much?
Tim exhaled sharply, rubbing a hand over his face, barely registering the scrape of his palm against the stubble on his chin.
He was spiraling. Overthinking. Doing exactly what Cassie didn’t want him to do when she dragged him out here.
“Still with me, Drake? Or am I interrupting a brooding session?”
Tim didn’t even look up, though he felt a sense of relief wash over him at the sound of his friend’s familiar tone, watching him slide into the seat next to Cassie. “What do you want, Kon?”
“Food. And maybe some actual conversation?” Kon’s grin was sharp, teasing, but Tim could hear the undercurrent of something else beneath it. Concern, maybe. Annoyance. Behind him, Bart bounced in, all energy and bright eyes. “Hey! You really went out and left us all wondering if we’d get the invite back into your brooding circle.”
“You’re late,” Tim deadpanned. “I’m already way ahead of you in the ‘feeling sorry for myself’ game.”
“Yeah, that’s a surprise,” Kon muttered, tossing a fry into his mouth. “So, what’s up, man? You finally coming to terms with how much Gotham sucks?”
“Do I look like I’m ‘coming to terms’ with anything?” Tim said dryly, running a hand through his hair.
The words sat heavy in his throat.
Because no. He wasn’t coming to terms with anything. He was still stuck in that place between knowing something was wrong and not knowing how to fix it.
He wanted answers. He wanted to understand.
Because this wasn’t just about Gotham, or Damian, or the changes in the family.
It was about you.
The words about you were sitting just on the tip of his tongue, but something was holding him back. Was he ready to say it out loud? Was he ready to admit to them that the problem wasn’t Gotham, but you?
“I don’t know,” Kon teased. “You don’t look nearly as miserable as you usually do when you get all angsty. Cassie’s worked her magic on you?”
Cassie rolled her eyes, but before Tim could reply, he felt Bart’s gaze flickering over to him with that sharp energy he always carried. “So, who’s the real problem? Because I’m guessing it’s not Gotham, but you’ve been keeping something from us.”
Tim hesitated, his hand tightening around the cup in front of him.
He hadn’t meant to talk about this.
But the words were already there, sitting on the tip of his tongue, refusing to be swallowed back down.
“It’s nothing,” he finally said, his voice quieter. “It’s just… (Name).”
There, he said it.
The words hung in the air.
“You mean your sister?” Bart questioned.
Tim paused. The simplicity of the question caught him off guard.
Your sister.
The word sat strange in his chest, like an ill-fitting puzzle piece forced into place.
Was that what you were?
Of course, that was what everyone thought. What everyone had always assumed. It was easier that way, wasn’t it? Easier to slap a label on something so tangled and complicated and pretend it all made sense.
But did it?
Because the truth was, the two of you had never really acted like siblings. Not in the way that mattered. Not in the way Dick had been like an older brother to him all these years, not in the way Bruce had been a mentor and partner to him. There had always been distance, always something unspoken and unresolved. You were just… there. Always there. Not quite a sibling, but not not one, either.
You weren’t like Stephanie, who shoved her way into his life until he had no choice but to care. You weren’t like Cassandra, who slipped into the role of family so seamlessly that it felt inevitable.
You were just… there.
Sometimes close. Sometimes so far away he couldn’t even read you.
And yet—
Yet, there had been moments. Quiet ones. The kind that didn’t fit into any neat, easy definition of family but still meant something. The nights after patrol when neither of you spoke but just sat in the bat cave in companionable silence. The rare times you had backed him up without hesitation, without question, even when no one else had. Moments where, in your own quiet, detached way, you had shown that you cared.
Hadn’t that meant something? Or had he just imagined it?
Tim faltered, staring down at his hands. The words felt heavy in his throat.
“No, she’s—”
He stopped.
He couldn’t say it.
Because what was he going to say? That you weren’t his sister? That you had never really felt like one?
Or that you were, that you always had been, even if neither of you had ever been good at showing it?
He couldn’t say it, because at the end of the day, you were his sister. Maybe not in the way that everyone assumed. Maybe not in the way that was easy or simple or made sense.
But you had been there. And Tim didn’t just let people go. He couldn’t just let people in his life go.
No matter how far away you seemed now.
“Whatever,” Tim said quickly, brushing it aside. “That’s not the point.”
“Sure, sure,” Kon said, his tone full of mischief. “Whatever you say, Tim.”
Before Tim could respond, Bart’s eyes suddenly widened. He tapped the table, pointing past Tim toward the window. “Oh, wait, isn’t that her right there?”
Tim’s breath caught in his throat.
He turned.
And there you were.
Walking past the café, completely unaware of the inner turmoil that had just been about you.
What were the chances?
“Oh yeah,” Kon said, leaning back in his chair as he squinted through the glass. “That is her.”
Tim felt his grip tighten around his cup.
Cassie tilted her head, watching you as you passed by the café window. “Oh, she cut her hair. Looks good on her.”
Tim barely processed her words, too caught up in the sheer coincidence of it all. Or maybe it wasn’t coincidence at all. Maybe Gotham was just cruel, always forcing things in front of him that he wasn’t ready to deal with.
“Should we invite her over?” Kon asked casually, already shifting in his seat.
“No—” Tim started quickly, panic flashing through him.
But Bart was already gone.
A gust of wind, a sudden rush of air—
And then you were there.
Hair windblown, eyes wide with confusion, breath still catching up from the sudden shift in space.
“The hell—” you started, blinking fast, clearly trying to process the fact that you’d just been yanked off the street and dumped at their table.
Tim didn’t even have time to glare at Bart for pulling this before your gaze finally settled on him.
Tim met your gaze on instinct.
And just as quickly, he wished he hadn’t.
Because the moment your eyes landed on him, your expression shifted. Slightly. Just the smallest shift. It was subtle. Barely even there. Just a small, fleeting change in your features.
Just enough that someone else might have missed it.
But Tim saw it. Of course he saw it. He always saw it. He felt it.
Like a blow to the chest, knocking the air right out of him. Like something sharp was twisting in his gut.
He barely kept himself from wincing.
Well, this is already going great…
Your visit to the orphanage had left you feeling unsettled. You kept replaying the conversation with Mrs. Cole in your head, dissecting every word, every glance, every hesitation. There was something about her that didn’t sit right with you. Something about the way she had looked at you, the way she spoke, like she knew more than she was letting on.
But before you could dwell on it any longer, you suddenly heard someone call your name.
You barely had time to turn, to see who it was, before—
Everything blurred.
The world around you shifted in a rush of wind and color, and the next thing you knew—
You were inside.
Inside a random café, sitting at a table surrounded by familiar faces.
The scent of coffee and something sweet hit you first, warm and inviting, but your brain was still playing catch-up.
Your eyes landed on Bart, who was grinning from ear to ear.
“Ta-da!”
You blinked.
What.
Your eyes then landed on the others at the table.
Cassie, Conner, and—
Tim.
Oh.
Oh.
Your stomach twisted.
It took you longer than it should have to realize what was wrong, why seeing Tim like this felt off.
Because this wasn’t the Tim you remembered.
This was a Tim who was younger, just as you were younger now.
It was the first time you were actually seeing him like this since you had found yourself back to when you were sixteen.
And god, did it feel weird. It never stopped being weird.
“Hey!” Bart grinned, all bright energy and no regard for personal space. “You looked like you were gonna wander around aimlessly, so I figured—why not save you the trouble?”
You blinked. Your brain was still trying to process what the hell just happened.
Kid Flash. Right. Speed. No sense of boundaries. No concept of asking first. Should’ve expected that.
You inhaled, barely holding back the urge to sigh, schooling your expression into something neutral, something polite. “Right. Thanks for that.”
“Oh nice! You didn’t scream,” Bart noted cheerfully, plopping into the seat next to you. “That’s an improvement.”
You turned to him, blinking. “Excuse me?”
“Y’know,” Bart waved a hand. “Last time I zoomed someone into a new location without warning, they kinda freaked out. You just looked mildly horrified.”
“That’s… comforting,” you said dryly, still adjusting to the sudden shift.
“Glad to be of service,” Bart chirped.
You exhaled sharply, finally taking in the people around you.
Cassie, smiling, looking a little amused.
Kon, grinning, elbows on the table.
Tim, staring at his coffee like it suddenly got so interesting.
You weren’t sure if that made things better or worse.
The café was warm, the scent of coffee and pastries filling the air, but you felt off, like you didn’t belong here, like you had been dropped into a scene that wasn’t meant for you.
Because you weren’t close to them. Not really.
Sure, you’d fought alongside them before, shared battlefields, been in the same circles because of Gotham and Tim, but outside of that? Outside of the life you’d left behind? There was nothing. No real connection. You weren’t friends.
Cassie leaned forward slightly, her expression open, easy. “You cut your hair.”
You blinked at the casualness of it. “Uh. Yeah.”
“Looks good on you,” Kon added, resting his arm on the back of his chair like he had all the time in the world.
You stared at them for a beat too long, trying to figure out if they were messing with you. If this was some kind of setup.
But their expressions were… genuine.
And you didn’t know what to do with that.
Why were they even being this nice?
Why were they looking at you like they actually wanted you here?
“…Thanks,” you said eventually, the word feeling foreign in your mouth.
You’d never really talked to them before. Not beyond polite small talk or necessary battle strategy. But now they were trying to make conversation, pulling you into their little group like you belonged there.
You watched as Kon casually elbowed Tim, who hadn’t said a word. Not once.
“What? Not going to say hi to your sister?”
Tim’s posture stiffened, like he hadn’t expected to be dragged into this.
You didn’t look at him.
He didn’t look at you.
The tension was immediate.
Cassie sighed, kicking Kon under the table. “The one time I’m asking you to not make things awkward..”
“I’m not the one..!” Kon tries to argue, but he backed off under Cassie’s glare.
Bart, either oblivious or just not caring, was still watching you with that bright-eyed curiosity, like he was studying something interesting under a microscope. “So what were you doing before I heroically saved you from walking around alone?”
You tensed, caught off guard by the question.
“I wasn’t—” You cut yourself off, shifting in your seat. “I was just running errands.”
Not a lie, exactly. But not the truth, either.
Mrs. Cole. The orphanage.
That wasn’t something you were about to share. Not yet.
Bart hummed, clearly not convinced but also not pushing it. “You sure? You looked pretty deep in thought.”
“Yeah,” Kon added, tapping his fingers against the table. “You weren’t exactly giving ‘casual stroll.’”
You glanced at them, at their easy camaraderie, their familiarity with each other. With Tim.
He still hadn’t said anything.
You could feel his presence across from you, a steady weight pressing at the edges of your awareness, but you didn’t look at him.
Not really.
You weren’t exactly ignoring him, but you weren’t acknowledging him either.
It was easier this way.
Easier to pretend like there wasn’t a tension suffocating the air between you two, like his presence wasn’t pressing against your awareness like a phantom touch.
But his friends?
They definitely noticed.
Of course they did.
Bart’s gaze flickered between you and Tim, curiosity written all over his face. Cassie’s smile faltered slightly, like she could sense the awkwardness and was trying to find a way around it. Even Kon, usually laid-back, was watching the both of you a little too closely.
Not subtle in the slightest.
And you hated it.
Hated that they were trying to figure you out.
You weren’t stupid.
You knew how this worked.
They were trying to get something from you, weren’t they? Information? They were being nice because they wanted to know something. About you. About Tim.
But why?
You barely even knew them.
Sure, you’d crossed paths, had mutual connections, but that wasn’t enough for them to care. So why were they acting like it was?
You didn’t want to be a part of this.
Didn’t want to be here.
“Y’know,” Cassie begins, breaking the silence. “You had this really intense thinking face on. Do you always look that serious?”
You blinked at her, caught off guard. “I—”
“I bet she does,” Kon interrupted before you could finish. “Bet she’s just like Tim—probably broods in her free time, too.”
Tim, for the first time since you joined the table, finally acknowledged the conversation, shooting him a glare. “She doesn’t brood.”
Kon raised a brow. “You sure? Because I was getting major brooding vibes when she was outside.”
“I don’t brood,” you said flatly.
“See?” Tim muttered.
Kon just shrugged. “Alright, alright. Serious vibes then. That better?”
“Not really.”
“I dunno,” Bart chimed in, resting his chin in his palm. “I kinda like the serious vibe. Makes it even more fun to mess with you.”
You gave him a blank look. “That’s not very reassuring.”
Bart grinned. “Wasn’t supposed to be.”
Cassie sighed, shaking her head. “Ignore them. They get like this when they meet new people.”
Your brows furrowed slightly. “New people?”
Cassie shrugged. “I mean, kinda? We’ve never really hung out before. Outside of fighting crime, that is.”
And that was true.
You had crossed paths before, sure. But actual conversation? Actual interaction? It had been minimal.
Which made this—whatever this was—even stranger.
You were still trying to figure out why they were doing this.
Why they were talking to you.
Why they were being nice.
You weren’t stupid.
They were fishing.
For what, you weren’t sure.
But you didn’t want to find out.
So you took the out when you saw it.
“I should go,” you said abruptly, pushing your chair back.
Kon blinked. “What? But you just got here.”
“Yeah, well I have other plans.”
Cassie frowned slightly. “Are you sure? You don’t have to rush off—”
“It’s fine,” you reassured, already standing. “It was nice seeing you guys.”
Your voice was polite. Empty. And you still didn’t look at Tim. You barely spared him a glance.
Cassie sighed, but didn’t push. “It was nice seeing you too, (Name). See you around?” You gave a polite nod at that, and then turned to leave.
But for a second, just a second, as you turned to leave, you felt it—
The way Tim’s gaze lingered on you.
You saw something flicker in his expression.
Something that looked almost like—
No.
You didn’t let yourself think about it. Didn’t let youtself feel anything about it.
It was something you didn’t have the energy to unpack.
So you didn’t.
You just walked away.
Bart let out a low whistle as the café door shut behind you. “Well, that wasn’t awkward.”
“Bart,” Cassie scolded, elbowing him lightly and shooting him a pointed look.
“What? It’s true.” He gestured at the door. “Did you see that? I mean, I was expecting a little awkwardness, but that was painful.”
Cassie sighed, giving Tim a quick glance, but he wasn’t reacting. Not outwardly, at least. She knew what was bothering him. They all did. It was impossible to miss, the way his shoulders were slumped, the way his hands fidgeted with the cup in front of him, his gaze unfocused as he stared down at the table like he was trying to break it apart with sheer willpower, the weight of the encounter settling heavily in his chest.
It wasn’t like Tim didn’t know things were weird between you two. But that—that was something else. His mind kept returning to the look on your face, that tiny flicker of discomfort as you’d stepped into the café, only to fade into polite indifference.
Indifference. That’s all it was.
He’d expected… what? That you’d at least acknowledge him more? That you wouldn’t act like he was just another person at the table?
Because that’s what it had felt like. Like he was just another acquaintance, someone who happened to be there, and nothing more.
You were polite, careful, giving Cassie, Kon, and Bart the same level of conversation you always did. But with him? It was like you had a wall up so high he couldn’t even see over it. And what made it worse was how easy it was to see through it. You weren’t ignoring him outright, but you also weren’t letting yourself interact with him beyond the bare minimum. It was deliberate.
Which meant you were doing it on purpose.
Which meant you didn’t want to talk to him.
And the worst part? Tim couldn’t even pinpoint why it bothered him so much. He’d seen you pull away before, but this felt different—he could see it in your eyes, the way you actively avoided him, the way you kept your answers to him curt, brief. Every word from you seemed to fall flat, like you were already somewhere else, mentally preparing to leave. He hadn’t expected an embrace, or anything dramatic, but this? It felt like an emotional wall, one that he wasn’t sure how to scale.
Tim swallowed, shaking the thought out of his head before it could get too deep.
Kon, likely sensing the shift in mood, stretched his arms over his head and leaned back in his seat. “Anyway, how’s everyone’s food? Because my burger is phenomenal.”
Cassie gave him a flat look. “Seriously?”
“What? I’m just saying, good food is good food.”
Bart, thankfully, jumped onto the change in conversation. “I knew I should’ve ordered the burger…”
Tim let the conversation fade into the background, keeping his expression neutral. He should just move on. It was one interaction. One awkward conversation. Nothing worth thinking about.
Except he was thinking about it.
He couldn’t help but compare it to the way you were with Damian.
That still didn’t make sense to him.
Because while you barely even looked at Tim, you were actually getting along with Damian now?
You’d apologised to Damian. Damian had apologised to you.
Tim had seen the way you pat Damian’s head, how Damian had smiled at you.
Damian, who used to view you as nothing but another obstacle, another person he had to prove himself better than. Damian, who you used to dismiss just as easily.
Tim gritted his teeth slightly.
When did that change? How did that change?
What had he missed?
And why did it even matter to him?
You were your own person. He had no right to dictate who you were close to, who you let in. It wasn’t like he had a claim to your time or attention.
But it did matter. Because for all the years you’d spent working together, for all the time you’d spent in the field, all the fights you’d fought—together—he’d never once seen you look at him the way you’d looked at Damian. Like you trusted him. Like you cared.
He shut his eyes briefly, then exhaled. No.
He was overthinking it.
He had to be.
He forced himself to let out a short breath, fixing his expression into something neutral before glancing back at Kon, who was now dramatically going on about his burger.
Tim let himself nod along, pretending to listen, pretending everything was fine.
But his mind was still on you. And no matter how much he tried to push it away, the feeling sat heavy in his chest.
“Ever going to turn to the next page?”
Adrien’s voice cut through the haze in your mind, snapping you out of whatever daze you’d fallen into. You blinked, realizing your eyes had been stuck on the same paragraph for—who even knows how long? Right. You were in the library. With Adrien and Caitlyn. You should be focusing on this now. But no matter how much you tried, you couldn’t. Not after the absolute mess of a day you’d had.
“Right. Yeah.” You muttered, hurriedly flipping to the next page even though you hadn’t actually processed a single word from the last one.
Adrien and Caitlyn exchanged a glance. You didn’t see it, but you could feel it. That unspoken concern. You weren’t exactly the most talkative person on a normal day, sure, but this was different. This reminded them of before. When you were on the brink of exploding. When you pushed them away because of everything that had happened.
And Caitlyn? She was having none of it.
She leaned in slightly, keeping her voice low for the library’s sake. “Okay, what’s up with you?”
You shook your head. “Nothing. Just exhausted.”
Adrien snorted quietly. “You say that every time you don’t want to talk about something.”
“Because I am exhausted,” you shot back, but your voice lacked any real weight behind it.
Adrien didn’t buy it. “Uh-huh. And I’m Batman.”
That earned a small huff from you. “No, you’re an idiot.”
Caitlyn smirked. “He can be both.”
Adrien gasped, mock-offended. “Et tu, Cait?”
“You were literally just shoving the cart return door for five minutes before realizing you had to pull it open,” Caitlyn deadpanned.
“Okay, but in my defense—”
“You have no defense,” you and Caitlyn said at the same time.
Adrien groaned. “Okay, you two suck. I’m being bullied.”
It was lighthearted, easy. A familiar rhythm. But it didn’t last long, because the next time Caitlyn looked at you, her expression softened again. “Seriously, though. You’ve been weird all day.”
“I’m fine,” you muttered.
“Liar.”
“I’m—”
“Liar,” Adrien echoed.
You let out a sharp breath, the sudden pressure getting to you, and the next words left your mouth harsher than you intended. “Can you two just drop it?”
There was a brief pause. Adrien and Caitlyn both stared at you, taken aback.
You sighed, immediately regretting it. “I’m sorry. I just—there’s a lot of bullshit going on.”
Caitlyn’s gaze didn’t waver. “You wanna tell us?”
You hesitated.
Where would you even start?
With the lunch you had with Barbara? The way she invited you out, how it seemed normal at first—until Dick showed up and you realized it was a setup? That it wasn’t just a casual lunch, but an intervention in disguise? Dick trying to talk to you like you weren’t avoiding him, like things weren’t still awkward between you two? The way he looked at you, like he still saw that younger version of you that needed him, and not the one that knew how to work without him now?
And the worst part? You could tell Dick actually believed he could fix things between you. That he could sit across from you, act like things weren’t broken, like he could just talk and that would somehow be enough to undo everything that happened.
Or maybe you should start with bumping into Elliot? How after your little encounter with the little boy, your head had suddenly filled with these flashes—images? Visions? Hallucinations? Images that weren’t yours but felt too real to be just dreams. You didn’t know what they were, only that they left you feeling unsettled, disconnected from your own reality.
And that was what led you to visit the orphanage. Where you met the warden, Mrs Cole. How something about Mrs. Cole didn’t sit right with you. How everything about her felt too perfect, too practiced, too pristine—like a picture frame with something ugly hidden behind the glass. Like she was playing a role rather than living a life. Something about her had unsettled you, made your skin crawl in ways you couldn’t even articulate. You weren’t sure if it was paranoia or instinct, but something about her wasn’t right. And that thought had lingered long after you left.
And then, of course, there was Tim.
Tim and his friends.
That whole encounter had been worse than you could’ve expected. When Bart had suddenly whisked you into that café, you hadn’t even had time to process it before you were sitting across from Tim and his friends, completely caught off guard.
Superboy. Wonder Girl. Kid Flash. You weren’t close to them. You had barely interacted with them, and yet they had acted so welcoming—too welcoming.
And Tim?
Tim barely spoke.
And neither did you.
You answered questions too quickly, too politely, all while making a conscious effort not to look at him. And Tim—he did the same. The two of you danced around each other, careful and distant, as if eye contact alone would shatter whatever fragile thing was left between you.
And the more you thought about it, the more it frustrated you, because—why had it been so awkward?
It shouldn’t have been.
There was nothing to be awkward about.
And that was exactly the problem.
There was nothing to be awkward about.
No bond. No closeness. Nothing substantial.
If anything, the two of you had the kind of dynamic distant coworkers would have—barely interacting, only speaking when necessary, a mutual awareness of each other but not much else.
So why had it felt so suffocating? Why had it felt like you were both tiptoeing around something?
And you knew it wasn’t the current you feeling like this. It was your sixteen-year-old self.
And you couldn’t quite pinpoint why.
Maybe it was because of everything that had led up to that moment. Maybe it was because of what happened before all this.
Because despite everything—despite the distance, despite the lack of an actual bond—there was still something there. Something unspoken, something unresolved.
And that was what made it awkward.
That was what made it feel like more than just an uncomfortable run-in.
It was why you had left as soon as you found an opening.
It had been a mess. The whole day. One tangled, suffocating mess. And even now, hours later, you could still feel the weight of it.
There was no way in hell you could tell Adrien and Caitlyn all of that.
You let out the biggest sigh, slumping back against your seat. The sound was loud enough to earn multiple hushed scoldings from around the library. You muttered out a quick, hushed apology before running a hand down your face, fingers threading through your hair.
Adrien nudged your foot under the table. “Hey. Whatever it is, you don’t have to carry it alone.”
Caitlyn nodded. “You don’t have to tell us everything. But just—don’t shut us out, okay?”
You swallowed, the guilt creeping in. Because they were right. They were always there for you, and yet here you were, keeping them at arm’s length. Not because you didn’t trust them. Not because you wanted to. But because dragging them into your family’s secrets—into the chaos that surrounded you—would only do more harm than good. For both them and your family.
Some truths just weren’t meant to be shared.
You exhaled through your nose, glancing between the two of them. “I know. And I appreciate you guys. Really.”
Adrien narrowed his eyes. “That felt like an ‘I’m not actually going to tell you anything but please don’t be mad at me’ appreciation.”
You let out a small, dry chuckle. “It’s exactly that kind of appreciation.”
Caitlyn rolled her eyes. “Of course it is.”
Silence settled between you.
Yet, you found your thoughts drifting towards Elliot once more. The flashes that you still couldn’t pinpoint whether they’re real or just a fucked up hallucination. The orphanage that felt off in ways you couldn’t quite put into words.
You couldn’t let it go.
You wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself if you didn’t at least try to figure out what was going on.
You needed an excuse. A reason to go back. A way to investigate without drawing too much suspicion.
And then, suddenly, something clicked in your mind.
You looked up at your two friends, a new thought forming. “…What do you guys think about volunteering at an orphanage?”
FInally done with this chapter ohmygod…. thank you all for being patient with me and hopefully you guys enjoyed this chapter 🥰 lmk your thoughts on this chapter lol. also, this was definitely more of a world-building/plot developing chapter (yes! the plot is finally moving lesgo!!) expect more of young justice core 4 and uf trio in chapter 7 as well as two surprise people soon 🤭
reader 🤝 tim — overthinking things to the max (i actually hope i did his character justice 😬)
also i promise i’ll answer my inbox soon 😭 there is just so much stuff to reply to but i’ll eventually empty it out sooner or later
taglist is closed ‼️
taglist (1/2): @tricksters-maze @dusk-muse @quethekillerqueen @silverklaus @isupportorbitalbombardment @nxdxsworld @vanessa-boo @coffeeaddictxd @moonsbluekingdom @yuya-bubbly @percythebitchwitch @anonymousdisco @jason-todd-fangirl-14 @redsakura101 @what-0-life @idkwhattoputhete @secretyouthcomputer @witch-waycult @allycat4458 @dazed-lavender @eclecticfurylady @wizzerreblogs @marsmabe @daddysfangirls-dc @hoeinthehouse @lisalamona @ilxandra @agent-nobody-knows @thethingwiththefeathers @mochiivqi @pix-stuff @narration-ator @nebulousmoon3990 @delias-stuff @froggy-voidd @jjsmeowthie @kore-of-the-underworld @nen-nyy @juthesillylesbain @vikkus-main @emilylouise123 @blueiones @horror-lover-69 @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wassupbroski55555 @reallyromealone @plsfckmedxddy @sea-glasses @203moonysello @luvly-writer @dovey-quacks2332 @love-theangel @hotdinoankles @vebbiewuzhere @animegirlfromvietnam @estreiiuh @simply-lovely78 @twismare @ssak-i @g4bbi3xx @alor-thes (idk why i can’t tag some of y’all, must be your settings i think 😓)
#angst#batsis#batfamily#batfam x batsis#batfam x reader#batsisreader#bruce wayne x daugther reader#damian wayne x sister reader#dick grayson x sister reader#jason todd x sister reader#tim drake x sister reader#cassandra cain x sister reader#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#cassandra cain#alfred pennyworth#barbara gordon#stephanie brown#duke thomas#x reader#batman#imagine#regressed reader#regressor reader#undoing fate
848 notes
·
View notes
Text
Think about it this way. Are lions evil? Are bears evil? Is one more evil than the other? No! Dolphins and sharks are that but in the water.
"dolphins are completely evil" I actually don't think we should assign human morality to animals with no concept of law or civilisation with an intelligence roughly equating to that of a toddler
#i cant blame people who are tired of shark hate. me too man. its so stupid and tried and done and we should get it over with#but maaaaan am i also tired that people always bring up dolphins in the shark conversation#youll be talking about how sharks are wonderful and dont deserve the hate and then someone slams the convo with “yeah -#dolphins are psychopath rapists! they are the bad ones!” like—HUH??? WHAT!!????#like come on these are two different things you dont need to put sharks on a pedestal by insulting other ocean life#we dont need a bad guy in the ocean?????#how about instead of ocean good guys and bad guys theres just….. ocean guys??? a complicated network of life???#not to mention the dolphin thing always ignores that. actually yeah. dolphins are capable of altruism#they can do many things. because they are SPECIES OF SEVERAL INDIVIDUALS#they are unpredictable but intelligent aquatic predators so maybe we should leave it at that instead of making them one thing or another
11K notes
·
View notes
Text
Dragon Age: The Veilguard Just Went From A Good RPG To One Of BioWare’s Most Important Games
In light of BioWare scattering some of its most foundational veteran talent to the winds, Dragon Age: The Veilguard sure reads like something made by people who saw the writing on the wall. The RPG leaves off on a small cliffhanger that could launch players into a fifth game, but I’m skeptical that we’ll ever get it. The quickness with which publisher Electronic Arts gutted BioWare and masked it with talk of being more “agile” and “focused” shortly after it was revealed The Veilguard underperformed in the eyes of the power that be makes me wonder if BioWare was also unsure it would get to return to Thedas a fifth time. Looking back, I’m pretty convinced the team was working as if Rook’s adventure through the northern regions of this beloved fantasy world might be the last time anyone, BioWare or fan, stepped foot in it. But that may have only made me appreciate the game even more.
Yeah, I might be doomsaying, but there’s a lot of reasons to do so right now. The loss of talented people like lead writer Trick Weekes, who has been a staple in modern BioWare since the beginning of Mass Effect, or Mary Kirby who wrote characters like Varric, the biggest throughline through the Dragon Age series, doesn’t inspire confidence that EA understands the lifeblood of the studio it acquired in 2007. The Veilguard has been a divisive game for entirely legitimate reasons and the most bad-faith ones you can imagine on the internet in 2025, but my hope is that history will be kinder to it as time goes on.
A Kotaku reader reached out to me after the news broke to ask if they should still play The Veilguard after everything that happened. My answer was that now we are probably in a better position to appreciate it for what it was: a (potentially) final word.
The Veilguard is just as much a send-off for a long-running story as it does a stepping stone for what (might) come. Its secret ending implies a new threat is lurking somewhere off in the distance but by and large, The Veilguard is about the end of an era. BioWare created an entire questline essentially writing Thedas’ history in stone, removing any ambiguity that gave life to over a decade of theory-crafting. As a long-time player, I’m glad The Veilguard solidifies the connective tissue between what sometimes felt like world of isolated cultures that lacked throughlines that made the world feel whole. But sitting your cast of weirdos down for a series of group therapy sessions unpacking the ramifications of some of the biggest lore dumps the studio has ever put to a Bluray disc isn’t the kind of narrative choice you make if you’re confident there’s still a future for the franchise.
Unanswered questions are the foundation of sequels, and The Veilguard has an almost anxious need to stamp those out. Perhaps BioWare learned a hard lesson by leaving Dragon Age: Inquisition on a cliffhanger and didn’t want to repeat the same restriction. But The Veilguard doesn’t just wrap up its own story, it concludes several major threads dating back to Origins and feels calculated and deliberate. If BioWare’s goal with The Veilguard was to bring almost everything to a definitive end, the thematic note it leaves this world on acts as a closing graf summing up a thesis the series hopes to convey.
Pushing away the bigotry that has followed The Veilguard like a starving rat digging through trash, one of the most common criticisms I heard directed against the game was that it lacked a certain thorny disposition that was prevalent in the first three games. Everyone in the titular party generally seems to like each other, there aren’t real ethical and philosophical conflicts between the group, and the spats that do arise are more akin to the arguments you probably get into with your best friends. It’s a new dynamic for the series. The Veilguard doesn’t feel like coworkers as The Inquisition did or the disparate group who barely tolerated each other we followed in Dragon Age II. They are a friend group who, despite coming from different backgrounds, factions, and places, are pretty much on the same page about what the world should be. They’re united by a common goal, sure, but at the core of each of their lived experiences is a desire for the world to be better.
This rose-colored view of leftism doesn’t work for everyone. At its worst, The Veilguard can be saccharine to the point of giving you a cavity, which is far from what people have come to expect from a series in which Fenris and Anders didn’t care if the other lived or died. It also bleeds into a perceived softening of the universe. Factions like the Antivan Crows have essentially become the Bat Family with no mention of the whole child slavery thing that was our first introduction to them back in Origins. The Lords of Fortune, a new pirate faction, goes to great lengths to make sure you know that they’re not like the other pirates who steal from other cultures, among other things. I joked to a friend once that The Veilguard is a game terrified of getting canceled, and as such a lot of the grit and grime has been washed off for something shiny and polished.
That is the more critical lens to view the way The Veilguard’s sanitation of Thedas. To an extent, I agree. We learned so much about how the enigmatic country of the Tevinter Imperium was a place built upon slavery and blood sacrifice, only for us to conveniently hang out in the common poverty-stricken areas that are affected by the corrupt politics we only hear about in sidequests and codex entries. But decisions like setting The Veilguard’s Tevinter stories in the slums of Dogtown gives the game and its writers a place to make a more definitive statement, rather than existing in the often frustrating centrism Dragon Age loved to tout for three games.
I have a lot of pain points I can shout out in the Dragon Age series, but I don’t think one has stuck in my craw the way the end of Anders rivalry relationship goes down in Dragon Age II. This is a tortured radical mage who is willing to give his life to fight for the freedom of those who have been born into a corrupt system led by the policing Templars. And yet, if you’ve followed his rivalry path, Anders will turn against the mages he, not five minutes ago, did some light terrorism trying to free. In Inquisition, this conflict of ideals and traditions comes to a head, but you’re able to essentially wipe it all under the rug as you absorb one faction or the other into your forces. So often Dragon Age treats its conflicts and worldviews as toys for the player to slam against one another, shaping the world as they see fit, and bending even the most fiercely devoted radical to your whims. And yes, there are some notable exceptions to this rule, but when it came to world-shifting moments of change, Dragon Age always seemed scared to assert that the player might be wrong. Mages and Templars, oppressed and oppressors, were the same in the eyes of the game, each worthy of the same level of scrutiny.
Before The Veilguard, I often felt Dragon Age didn’t actually believe in anything. Its characters did, but as a text, Dragon Age often felt so preoccupied with empowering the player’s decisions that it felt like Thedas would never actually get better, no matter how much you fought for it. While it may lack the same prickly dynamics and the grey morality that became synonymous with the series, The Veilguard’s doesn’t just believe that the world is full of greys and let you pick which shade you’re more comfortable with. It’s the most wholeheartedly the Dragon Age universe has declared that the world of Thedas can be better than it was before.
Essentially retconning the Antivan Crows to a family of superheroes is taking a hammer to the problem, whereas characters like Neve Gallus, a mage private eye with a duty-bound love for her city and its people, are the scalpel with which BioWare shifts its vision of how the world of Thedas can change. Taash explores their identity through the lens of Dragon Age’s longstanding Qunari culture, known for its rigidness in the face of an ever-changing world, and comes out the other end a new person, defined entirely by their own views and defying others. Harding finds out the truth behind how the dwarves were severed from magic and still remembers that she believes in the good in people. The heroes of The Veilguard have seen the corruption win out, and yet never stop believing that something greater is possible. It's not even an option in The Veilguard's eyes. The downtrodden will be protected, the oppressed will live proudly, and those who have been wronged will find new life.
That belief is what makes The Veilguard a frustrating RPG, to some. It’s so unyielding in its belief that Thedas and everyone who inhabits it can be better that it doesn’t really entertain you complicating the narrative. Rook can come from plenty of different backgrounds, make decisions that will affect thousands of people, but they can never really be an evil bastard. If they did, it would fundamentally undermine one of the game’s most pivotal moments. In the eleventh hour, Dragon Age mainstay Varric Tethras is revealed to have died in the opening hour, and essentially leaves all his hopes and dreams on the shoulders of Rook. After our hero is banished to the Fade and forced to confront their regrets in a mission gone south, Varric’s spirit sends Rook on their way to save the day one last time. He does so with a hearty chuckle, saying he doesn’t need to wish you good luck because “you already have everything you need.” He is, of course, referring to the friends you have calling to you from beyond the Fade.
Varric, the narrator of Dragon Age, uses his final word to declare a belief that things will be okay. This isn’t because Rook is the chosen one destined to save the world, but because they have found people who are unified by one thing: a need to fight for a better world. But that’s what makes it compelling as a possibly final Dragon Age game. Reaching the end of a universe’s arc and being wholly uninterested in leaving it desecrated by hubris or prejudice is a bold claim on BioWare’s part. It takes some authorship away from the player, but in return, it leaves the world of Thedas in a better place than we found it.
The Veilguard is an idealistic game, but it’s one that BioWare has earned the right to make. Dragon Age’s legacy has been one of constantly shifting identity, at least two counts of development hell, and a desire to gives players a sandbox to roleplay in. Perhaps, as Dragon Age likely comes to a close, it’s better to leave Dragon Age with a game as optimistic as the people who made it. I can’t think of a more appropriate finale than one that represents the world its creators hope to see, even as the world we live in now gives us every reason to fall to despair.
In my review for The Veilguard I signed off expressing hope for BioWare’s future that feels a bit naive in retrospect. Would a divisive but undeniably polished RPG that felt true to the studio’s history be enough when, after 10 years of development, rich suits were probably looking for a decisive cultural moment? That optimism was just about a video game. Having lived through the past 32 years, most of the optimism I’ve ever held feels naive to look back on. I think I’m losing hope that the world will get any better. But even if we haven’t reached The Veilguard’s idealized vision, I’ll take some comfort in knowing someone previously at BioWare still believes it’s possible. - ken shepard, shepardcdr.bsky.social
728 notes
·
View notes
Text
No no listennnn it’s the way Obi-Wan drags out the first ‘a’ in Anakin’s name. It’s the way everyone else ignores the hyphen in Obi-Wan’s name and runs it all together but Anakin pronounces every syllable slowly and clearly. It’s how Anakin was the only constant in Obi-Wan’s life from the time Qui-Gon died, how he threw all of his energy into keeping Anakin safe and sheltered, because he’d already seen too many horrors as a slave. It’s about how Anakin went to Obi-Wan’s room every night for a year because he was afraid he would disappear like Qui-Gon and his mom, and Obi-Wan lost sleep because he doesn’t know how to swim. It’s how Anakin grumbled and complained about Obi-Wan’s teaching to others because his feelings were so muddled and confused and yet he would die for him in a heartbeat and thrived on his approval. How Anakin, hours after losing his mom horrifically and suddenly, threw himself into a battle with Count Dooku on Geonosis and lost his arm to save Obi-Wan because he couldn’t lose him too. How Obi-Wan tried to steer Anakin from attachment but in the process became irrevocably attached himself, admitting multiple times to loving Anakin, passing down the gift his own Master gave him for his birthday years ago that meant nothing to Obi-Wan when he got it but meant everything to Anakin because it was from Obi-Wan, holding onto Anakin’s lightsaber and cloak when all else of him was lost, taking care of his children because they were living pieces of him. It’s that they called each other and asked after the other constantly when they’re apart during the Clone Wars. It’s that Ahsoka was technically Anakin’s Padawan but they thought of her as theirs and she called them her parents to others. It’s the little things like Anakin modifying Obi-Wan’s R4 droid to look like his own R2 unit. It’s the big things like them being able to sense one another from lightyears away even after Anakin turns. It’s Obi-Wan willfully turning a blind eye to Anakin’s violations of the code because he wanted him to be happy more than he wanted him to be a good Jedi. Anakin still referring to him as “Master” even after their apprenticeship is over, to their last battle; Anakin wishing that Obi-Wan would stay with him in his time of need rather than go to fight General Grievous and end the war; that they were the greatest Jedi to live, at the end of the age of heroes, “the best for last” and they were so insanely, disgustingly, beyond attached despite the Code’s teachings on what made a Jedi good, and they were the best. They were the best because they were together. Because they were Kenobi and Skywalker and that became one name, the name of the Open Circle Fleet, name of the greatest duo the Jedi had ever seen. I consider almost nothing from the sequel trilogy canon EXCEPT for the force dyad because you can’t tell me they weren’t one and never even knew because that was just how they were. They just figured they matched each other’s freak too hard. That’s just them.
#anyway (lying horizontal on couch) I feel fine#star wars#star wars prequels#star wars novels#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#obi wan and anakin#the team#obikin#owk series#kenobi series#the clone wars#tcw#star wars the clone wars#my post
680 notes
·
View notes
Text
mmmokay i was gonna ignore all of this and not even give it the time of day, but the longer i sit with it the harder it is to sleep. some vile shit is being spread about me in discord servers.
i dont see anyone talking about this publicly so i didnt wanna shine a spotlight on it and give more spread to lies, which is what i assume m*onyinpisces wants. i also have no idea how im meant to post receipts to disprove an event that’s never come close to happening. SO i just wanna say that if youve heard these accusations about how i behave and treat people in my discord server, my discord is public and linked everywhere, and anyone has always been able and welcome to go search my name and read through every message ive ever sent
i’ve also been told that mo*ny calls me her “nemesis”? which is such a small detail that doesn’t matter in the slightest but i feel is a good indication of her mindset and how much credence to give her fantasies— ive NEVER interacted with her. ive never messaged her, directed a post at her, DMd her, subtweeted her, commented on or ever read her fics. i became aware of her when her discord drama went around last year, and i blocked/muted her immediately. so to be a nemesis in her mind reveals a very concerningly one sided fixation, ripe with delusion.
yes m*ony is grossly aphobic. this is why i’ve never tried to read her fics despite so many raving reviews, i knew they wouldn’t be for me. shes also jealous and nasty, as i learned from the screenshots of all that old discord drama. but casually nurturing a life-destroying lie about someone is actually fucking evil imo, and i can no longer retain friendships or even civil contact with anyone who is okay with her and that kind of behaviour.
#i was following friends who liked her and simply added her name to my muted posts list#i will now be blocking all on sight#i fully believe she’s thriving off checking my blog and searching her name and seeing what everyone is getting upset over#so i will continue to live my best life and not think about her at all after this 🥰#honestly i’m gonna open my inbox too. i got nothing to hide from
164 notes
·
View notes
Text
A Bird's Wings - Part 30
masterpost this is a first draft, please no editing or concrit <3
Danny’s first thought when he woke up in the morning was how rested he was.
It was almost shocking.
He’d been so exhausted for for the past few weeks that to feel rested was a relief that almost made him cry.
Danny’s second thought was about his wings, which he still seemed to have. That was a pretty quick revelation caused by the fact that he was asleep on his stomach. The wings pulled at the sheets as he stretched lazily. At least they hurt less than yesterday at least. He was careful as he sat up, a cumbersome affair with the wings. It basically resulted in Danny getting his legs off the side of the large bed and simply standing up backwards, but at least it did result in him standing.
Grateful for Alfred’s thoroughness, Danny brushed his teeth before taking an awkward shower. He kept to the shower wand only and tried to keep as much water off his wings as possible. Despite the care, he still felt (and looked) like a rain ruffled bird after he had dressed in the modified sweater and a pair of his normal pants. He did what he could to at least tame his hair, swallowed his morning medication, and left the sanctuary of his borrowed room.
“Master Danny, impeccable timing,” Alfred said when Danny came across him in what Danny thought was the foyer. “Breakfast will be served in half an hour in the kitchen. Would you like some coffee or tea to start your day?”
“Coffee would be great, if it’s not any trouble,” Danny said with a bashful smile. He still wasn’t quite sure how to handle Alfred’s uncanny ability to show up and offer his service.
“A standard request of coffee is hardly trouble,” Alfred said in such a way that Danny felt bad for trying to be polite.
He didn’t think that his Midwest manners were going to get him very far in this house. Manor.
Still trying to puzzle out how his life got him into things like this, Danny followed Alfred to the kitchen. Bruce was already there, looking still half a sleep as he sipped on his own mug of coffee. For the moment, the table was children free.
“Cream or sugar?” Alfred ask as he headed towards the counter.
“Cream please,” Danny said. He turned to Bruce and gave a little smile. “Morning, Bruce.”
“Good morning, Danny,” Bruce said, his voice a low, sleepy rumble. (Danny did his best to fight the blush that the tone caused.) “Would you like some help drying off your wings?”
So much for not blushing. “Ah, yeah. That would be really nice. I tried to do what I could, but…”
Bruce chuckled softly. “Completely understandable. It’s a very awkward angle to try and manage.” He set down his mug and stood. “Fortunately for you, Damian is quite the animal buff and I was sent some very extensive articles on caring for wings.”
“Oh gods,” Danny said. The words were muffled by the way he buried his burning face into his hands.
“Damian simply wants the best for you,” Bruce pointed out.
“Sure, but still,” Danny said. He rubbed at his face as he let himself lean his head back and stare up at the ceiling for a moment, “I’m not a pet.”
Danny saw Bruce come over out the corner of his eye, towel in hand, and rolled his head a little to glance at him. He thought it was progress that he didn’t flinch when Bruce reached out, clearly telegraphing his motion, to run a hand over Danny’s wing.
“No one thinks that you’re a pet, Danny,” Bruce said with so much sincerity in his eyes that Danny had to look away. “Knowing how to take care of your wings is the same as making sure that Damian has easy access to vegetarian meals or that the computers at the manor have a dyslexic friendly font installed for Dick or that Barbara can easily get around in her wheelchair. Your wings, even if only sometimes, are part of you. And for better or worse, my family and I seem rather intent to see you well.”
Danny rubbed at the back of his neck as he glanced back at Bruce. “Part of it may be that I’m not exactly used to that sort of attention. I mean, Lucius tries to make me take care of myself, as well as some coworkers, but in Gotham that sort of feels more like new rogue prevention,” Danny joked.
Luckily Bruce chuckled at that. “I am sorry that we’re so overwhelming.”
“No, don’t be. It’s… excuse the bird analogy, but it’s just a very full nest, isn’t it? It feels cozy. It’s just something different to try and wrap my head around,” Danny explained. “And I won’t pretend that I don’t still have issues, as much as it’s something that I’ve worked really hard on personally and in therapy, dying at fourteen leaves a person with some issues.”
Not to mention being a super hero, staying half dead, dying a second time, and all of the other things that went on during his high school years.
“Yes, I would imagine so,” Bruce said after a pause. His voice was soft and sad.
“Bruce—”
“Sorry,” Bruce said. “When Jason was fifteen, we thought he had died. He ended up out of reach and with extensive brain trauma and memory loss. I know how much it effected him. I’m sorry you had to go through something at that age also.”
Danny squeezed one of Bruce’s hands where it was clasped tightly around a towel. “He’s here now. He’s alive and he seems happy. He has a boyfriend and everything. I’m not saying it doesn’t still pull at him, but it hasn’t dragged him to the bottom. At least not anymore.”
Bruce smile was a somber, soft thing. “Thank you. And you’re here too.”
Danny blinked at that. Bruce wasn’t wrong. He didn’t know almost any of the story, but he wasn’t wrong. Wings and all, Danny was still alive. He smiled softly back. “Yeah, I am.”
#I might be flirting with a breakdown#but we're going to ignore that and write#dp x dc#danny/bruce#birdritch
597 notes
·
View notes
Text
CW: ghost/referenced ghoap x reader, slight angst, possessive behaviour - dividers -> @/cafekitsune
Being the one to pick up Soap’s wardrobe from a secondhand store— the donation so fresh that the scent hadn’t even had the chance to fade and mingle with the rest of the shop. You’re wearing a dead man’s hoodie and you haven’t got the faintest clue.
You like his overbearingly rugged smell; find yourself lifting up the collar to inhale and wonder what the person who donated it is like. The hoodie is emblazoned with a name— maybe he’ll see you on the street one day in his old clothes and use it as an ice breaker. The thought is nice. You don’t even know.
Soap was a man who liked personlized items; a taste for things that were one of a kind— just like him. Everything he touched had been marked by a man living a full life and was wholly unmistakable to the discerning eye of the shadow who knew him inside out.
So why was ghost, absolutely swamped in grief, forced to see an interloper wearing his boy’s clothes? He just wanted a fucking coffee.
Johnny’s official family funeral had been no more than a month ago and there was already a stranger wearing his stuff. If ghost had the privilege to grab that box of Johnny’s items and run, it would be neatly tucked away in his closet, silently cherished. Not hanging off the frame of some random civilian who could never even begin to fathom the depths of a man like John MacTavish.
It must’ve been the world playing a sick joke on him that you, who didn’t even know the man, would be able to collect Johnny’s stuff before him. Never allowed anything.
Suffice to say, he’s pissed when he spots you. Stands a bit too close to you so Johnny’s scent can catch in his nose. You’re clearly nervous, but manage to smile hopefully when he makes an offhanded comment about liking the garment. You probably think they’re his clothes, don’t you?
Well, for all intents and purposes, they are.
You ask if he’s ‘MacTavish’ and something in him wants to scream at you that the world hated him far too much for that to ever happen— instead he just nods, leering at how happy that makes you. He can’t tell if your response lights up his brain because he wants to bite your head clean off— or because somewhere, deep inside him, seeing someone so excited about ‘finding’ Johnny is nice.
He hatches a plan. Knead away at your apprehension towards his intimidating appearance, bag a quick fuck— god knows he needs one, grab the clothes, and disappear from your life with Johnny’s items finally where they belong. It’s perfect.
Well, it’s perfect until an unavoidable, nagging voice starts to rattle around in the back of his skull that Johnny would have been absolutely smitten with you. You might have been one last parting gift sent from his boy, how could he ever turn that down? The thought of fucking you in Johnny’s clothes, being able to nudge his crooked nose into the fabric and chase the scent that’s starting to entangle with your own— it sends him reeling
Johnny would be so pleased if the scent of their sweet lamb caught. Can vividly picture him absolutely beaming while huffing at the clothes before urging ghost to take a sniff for himself.
He latches onto the notion that maybe, just maybe he could tuck you and the clothes away somewhere safe for his eyes only— teeth already sunken deeper into you than he could ever possibly imagine by the point he finally acknowledges the gnawing revelation.
Johnny would want this for the both of you. This time he’d keep you safe.
#love ‘he fell harder’ okay? 😭😭😭#you can’t tell me that ghost doesn’t come around to coffee after the incident btw#reader and ghost both seeing soap in each other… maybe in vastly different ways but still… ough#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghoap x reader#ghost#x reader#x you#cloth writes
631 notes
·
View notes
Text
Picture Perfect pt 1
Lieutenant MacTavish confiscated your suggestive, racy photo when your then-boyfriend was waving it around, showing all his army buddies. If he then studied your picture and used it as wanking material for the next year, complete with a few domestic fantasies, that was nobody's business but his own; he wasn't hurting anyone. The picture was tucked away in a drawer, completely forgotten about until the day he came back from deployment as a captain with a nasty bullet graze and spotty memory. Cleaning out his desk, he found your photo again. He couldn't remember your name but he knew what you sounded like moaning his name. He didn't remember where you'd met but he knew he slipped a ring on your finger the night you both went out searching for the best garlic bread in the city. He wasn't sure if you had family but he knew what the silken clench of your cunt felt like around his fingers and cock. With all his unexpected free-time maybe he should track down his wayward wife. It had been too long since he'd seen you and he wasn't one to let things slip through his fingers. Whatever caused your separation would be dealt with, he wasn't going to lose you again.
3k words about Captain MacTavish finding his wife who he needs to re-woo. Nothing too serious, just a little scene.
His head ached as he cleaned out his desk, at least half due to his clenched jaw, muscles corded and knotted along the sharp jut of bone. Who did the brass think they were, putting him on indefinite leave just because of a bit of spotty memory. He remembered everything important! Everything that mattered was highlighted neon bright in his brain—the things that would keep his men alive, the pressure points of informants needed to complete the job. It was only the finer details that seemed to slip through his fingers like sand. What school he went to, when he'd graduated boot camp. A snarl crept across his face he gathered up everything in his desk drawer and threw it into a box. Talk about bullshit.
Slamming the drawer shut he turned to the next, scooping up handfuls of papers and knickknacks alike to be thrown haphazardly together, ready to be toted off home. He'd given up his life for the military and this was how they wanted to treat him? The first sign of something not going their way and they wanted to ship him off like trash. Like he couldn't do his job better than everyone on this goddamned base. Who had the longest streak of missions without a casualty? That's right, it was him.
Reaching into the back of the drawer he swiped around heatedly, looking for any remaining items he might have missed with his first pass. A smooth, glossy material met his fingertips and he pulled it out with an annoyed huff, turning to throw it into the box with the rest before taking in what was in his hand.
It was a picture.
A very pretty picture.
You were sat on the bed, suggestively posing for the camera, perched on your heels with a warm smile directed towards the lens. Eyes staring into his soul.
He knew this picture. He'd helped you take it, hadn't he? Or maybe you'd sent it to him? He couldn't quite remember the particulars but he remembered the photo. His pretty wife, all dolled up just for him in his favorite color. You'd sent it to help him through a deployment now that he was thinking about it. Something to remember you by while he was away.
As if he could forget you.
He slumped back into his chair holding the picture up to study it. Tilting it to keep the reflective shine off your face. Where was his wife at now? He knew he hadn't seen you for a while, but why? Why didn't you live together?
His head gave a particularly nasty throb and he tucked the thought away, refocusing. It didn't matter why you weren't together. He would find you and bring you home. He didn't believe in divorce and it was time to work through this separation. Plus, he had a plethora of unexpected free time suddenly staring him down. What better way to use it than to find an errant spouse.
Tucking the picture into his pocket, he started making plans to reach out to a few old friends. A name would be helpful but he was nothing if not resourceful.
\\\
You had just put the finishing touches on your dinner, aromatic herbs scenting the air when the doorbell rang. Wondering who would show up this late in the evening unannounced, you wiped your hands before heading to see. What greeted you was a mountain of a man with a flinty look on his face. A grown-out mohawk and bright blue eyes, weathered and creased, met your gaze before a slow smile broke out across his sternly handsome face.
"There you are, bonnie lass. No need to worry any longer, I'm home."
Without waiting for your response he ducked down to press a kiss to your cheek, his scruff scratching your skin before he pushed his way inside, letting a hand drag along your hip in passing. You shivered and shifted away, your mouth dropping open in shock.
"Wait—you can't come in," you spluttered, trying to place if you'd ever seen this man before. You followed him hesitantly to the kitchen where you saw he had found your silverware drawer and was taking a bite of your food hunched over the stovetop.
Watching him shovel the food into his mouth you observed the stranger, keeping a healthy distance between the two of you. You took in his disheveled hairstyle all the way down to his well-worn boots which he hadn't bothered to remove at the door. Asshole. He was already rude for storming in like he owned the place but to not have the common courtesy to pull his filthy shoes off before he tracked dirt all over your clean floors was beyond the pale.
"Better than I remember, hen."
Your eyes grew wide as you stared in shock at his audacity. "You can't just push your way into a strangers home and eat their food. Didn't your mother teach you any manners?" You mentally smacked yourself, pulling yourself back to heel quickly. Your mouth was going to get you into trouble one of these days.
"Ach, it's been a while since I'm talked with my mam. I hope you've been keeping in contact with her." Great blue eyes turned to pin you to your place, "It would break her heart if she stopped hearing from you."
You weren't going to even touch the double standards of that statement. Maybe if you were feeling a bit more sure of yourself but you felt firmly on the back foot right now.
"Why are you here?" you tried again, getting your thoughts back on track. "What is it you want?" Direct. To the point. You'd knows the man for less than a minute but you got the feeling he would steamroll right over the slightest hint of hesitancy from you. A wrecking ball in human form.
He paused, his hand halfway to his mouth loaded with another bite and gave you an obscure look, eyes glinting with something you couldn't make out.
"I'm here to bring my wife home, of course."
Of course. So simple. And it explained exactly nothing.
"Okay," you hedged, frowning at him. "I don't have her tucked away in a closet so what's that have to do with me?"
The stranger gave a mysterious smile before going back to your food. It was already halfway gone with the way he was inhaling it. A spark of annoyance traveled up your spine to sit with your shock and unease. You'd spent a good chunk of time making that and now you wouldn't even be able to enjoy it.
You'd really been looking forward to it too.
"Well?" you tried again. "Why are you in my house if you're looking for your wife? I certainly haven't seen her," and you wouldn't tell him even if you had. There was a indisputable manic glow coming from behind his eyes that made you wary. Some hind brain part of you perking up with a flashing 'danger' sign when you looked at this man who had commandeered your kitchen.
Scooping up the final bite, he dropped his spoon into the sink with a swallow and came over to you, reaching up to cup your face, thumbs rasping gently along your cheekbones. The way his fingers curved over the back of your skull kept his hands in place when you tried to pull away. "Just look at you, prettier than I remembered."
He did seem awfully entranced with you now that the food was gone. Eyes roving your face and trailing down to your stockinged feet before locking with yours once more. A small hint of a smile peeked through his sternness, a hint at brighter depths hidden behind the stone wall of his stoic expression.
Whether that brightness equaled kindness was still up for debate.
"I still don't know who you are or why you're in my house," you stammered, him finally relaxing enough to allow you to pull back out of his grasp. You took a shaky step backwards to put some distance back between the two of you.
"Gonna play it that way, are we?" he rumbled, his deep voice holding a bit of a growl. "All right. If I wooed you once I can woo you again, aye? I'm not above a bit of groveling to get you back where you belong." You were annoyed at the flutter you felt when he smiled charmingly down at you. Clearly a well-practiced expression on him. "Although you acting like you don't remember your husband's name is pretty hurtful. Are you a spiteful lass, then?" His smile changed to a there-and-gone smirk hiking up one side of his mouth, "I always did like them with a bit of bite."
You swallowed nervously.
"I think you need to leave," you tried, gesturing towards the front door. "I'm not your wife and there's no one else here so I'd appreciate it if you left." You tried to steel yourself, puffing up your chest to make yourself seem bigger and more self-assured. Hoping to dissuade him.
"We'll take it slow, I know better than to rush these things," he stated, dropping down to press a there-and-gone kiss to your forehead. "I'll be by tomorrow to fix that dripping faucet and then we can go for lunch."
Pulling your thoughts back into line you gaped at him. "Do not show back up at my house tomorrow," you told him, ire barely concealing the pleading lining every word but he wasn't listening. With a mockingly cheerful whistle he headed back towards the door, breezing out just as easily as he had breezed in.
You were left with a rumbling stomach and a quiet house, feeling like you'd just been sucker-punched. What just happened?
\\\
You weren't going to answer the door no matter how hard he knocked. You weren't home. Nobody was home so he should just leave.
Fretting on the couch, you glared at your entryway in outrage and uncertainty in equal measure. How long was he going to beat on your door? It already felt like it'd been going on for ages. You could barely hear yourself think with the way his hammering blows rattled the wood. You knew it wasn't the most secure and you were half worried he was going to take it off its hinges if this kept up.
You still weren't sure what happened last night.
After he left you scrounged up some dinner. Nothing like what you'd originally made but needs must. By the time you were finished you were beyond exhausted, the day's events draining you of every spec of energy. Deciding that you would deal with everything tomorrow you went to bed, certain that things would look different in the morning light.
What you hadn't counted on was tossing and turning all night, mind running a thousand miles an hour as you thought about your self-proclaimed 'husband' in all his glory. Why had he picked you to barge in on?
The only way you saw it was he was trying to con you out of or into something.
This whole 'wife' shtick could be a ploy he used with other unsuspecting people until he got whatever he wanted from them. This would hold a lot of weight if you had anything of value. Beyond a few pricey electronics there wasn't a whole lot you had.
And if he was trying to con you into something, well good luck to him. You were nothing if not stubborn and knowing someone was trying to pull a fast one on you ahead of time? You'd be able to dig your feet in until the problem went away.
But now it was noon and the problem was back at your house with no true plan in sight.
You didn't have a whole lot of options past hoping he went away. You'd rather not get the cops involved though you would if he seemed at all violent. You didn't have anyone who could come scare him away or talk to him for you. You were stuck hoping that he would get tired and leave. Hoping that he decided you were too much effort for whatever prank or ill plan he had hatched with you as the victim.
While your thoughts slowly spiraled you never noticed the pounding quieting before there was a rustle of bags and a scraping sound coming from the handle. What you did notice was your door suddenly swinging open, the stranger from last night standing back up to full height from where he'd been crouched, pocketing something in a swift movement.
"Salty lass, not letting your husband in when he's knocking at the door," he groused before brushing it aside, moving back towards the kitchen to deposit the bags he was holding on the table. "I brought lunch with so we could eat here and get to know each other again rather than going out. I don't much care for the stares," he gestured to his temple and the mass of scar tissue that furrowed from his brow back towards his skull. "There's a fantastic little deli not too far from my house. I couldn't remember what you liked so I got a few different options."
You could only stand and watch in dismay as he worked to pull food from the bags he brought, a well-worn tool bag set off to the side showed he planned to make true to his word from yesterday.
With the daylight and an absence of shock you were able to take him in, from his broad shoulders pulling at the cotton covering them—seams straining against his bulk as he moved around your kitchen pulling out plates and cups—down to his thick thighs, rounded and looking quite capable of running anyone down. You watched him do a double-take at the kitschy collection of mugs you owned before continuing on. In no time flat the table was set and he looked at you expectantly.
"Did you just pick the lock on my front door?" you finally gathered yourself enough to ask, still staring at him, not making a move towards the table. You kind of thought that only happened in tv shows and books, not in real life.
The stranger brushed it off with a wave of his hand, "Don't worry about all that, although we need to see about getting you some better security. You'll move into mine, of course. It's much more secure."
You did a double take at his presumption.
"You're joking. If anything I need better security from you."
This was ridiculous. What was the bit? What was he hoping to swindle from you with all of this? You didn't have spare cash—everything went straight to bills. Your apartment was decorated with items from the thrift shop, nothing he could hock. You had half a mind to let this play out—see it through to its end just to watch his mounting frustration.
"That's hurtful, hen. I know I've changed a bit over the years—got a few more scars than you probably remember—but I'm still me, aye? Still just Johnny, even though I'm a captain now." His chest puffed up on the word captain, clearly something he took pride in. You couldn't help the sardonic congratulations you shot his way, looking to stick a pin in his inflating ego.
He didn't seem to hear the tone you used and for the first time you saw a full, true smile break out over his face, nothing like the earlier smirks and half-hearted grins. It was shocking how much it changed his whole demeanor. Suddenly this stern, stoic man turned into a kid being complimented on their artwork.
For a split second you felt ashamed at yourself, that you could be cruel to someone like that, even if it was slight and mostly in your own head. Only for a moment though. You quickly remembered that he was in your house after picking the lock no less. It was annoying how easily he seemed to derail your thoughts and feelings.
He stepped closer to you as if he were about to sweep you into a hug, a loved one to share in a celebration with. You darted around the table instead, keeping it firmly between the two of you, wanting all the distance you could get from this handsome stranger.
You cleared your throat, "I'm sure your wife misses you," maybe you could redirect him? "You should go find her."
"Does she?" he asked with a quizzical smile, as if you were in on a joke together and he was playing along.
"Without a doubt."
"Well, I'll have to do everything I can to make sure she takes me back." With a jarring slap to his thigh he changed the subject. "Come sit down, it's time to eat."
You watched him warily for a moment, ensuring he wasn't going to lunge for another hug before hesitantly taking a seat. Looking at the food spread out in front of you, your mouth started watering like a traitor. You would be ecstatic at the offering if it wasn't your insistent pseudo-husband who brought it.
Pulling a dish towards you with a fleeting thought about poison, you let your mind wander to the sounds of chewing. What were you going to do? He clearly wasn't going to leave just because you told him to. He acted like you'd known each other for years
Maybe it was best to play along. You could act like a separated spouse and give him a to-do list a mile long to scare him away. You couldn't see another way out of this past being so odious and leaning into stereotypes hard enough that he got bored and stopped playing this unusual routine. And in the back of your mind you were worried about what would happen if you upset him by insisting too strongly that you weren't his spouse.
You looked at him, observing as he demolished his lunch. Hopefully it would wear the shine off of this spouse routine quickly. If he was picking the locks to get inside it wasn't like you could keep him out. Instead you'd wear him down, make him see that this wasn't really what he wanted and then he'd go on his way. Breeze out of your life the same way he'd breezed in.
With a plan firmly in place you took the time to enjoy your lunch. Might as well milk it for everything he'd give you while you were doing this and the food truly was delicious. He'd managed to get a little bit of everything so it was practically buffet style at your table. In no time flat you were stuffed.
Finishing your last bite you turned to look at him. Time to get started.
"You said something about fixing the sink?"
511 notes
·
View notes
Text
you can manifest anything in days, hours, even seconds.
you ever think about how you’re shifting realities right now? you just did it. again. and again. and. boom. there it goes. you’re not stuck in one solid, concrete world. you’re a flipbook of possibilities, and every second, a new page turns. the you reading this isn’t the you from five seconds ago. that version of you is gone. poof. never to return. god, i miss her.
so, why do people think manifestation takes time? time is just the illusion that makes reality feel digestible to our little human brains. but you don’t "wait" for things. you shift to them.
LOA isn’t about "forcing reality" like you’re wrestling fate to the ground. it’s about assuming you’re already in the reality where your desire exists. because the multiverse is infinite. every possibility is real somewhere. you’re not "creating" your dream life. you’re just moving to the timeline where it’s already true.
you can literally manifest in milli-seconds. the second you assume something is true, you land in the reality where it’s true. the only reason it sometimes feels "slow" is because you keep doubting it, wobbling between frequencies like a radio that’s not quite locked in.
for example, you want your dream body? kewl. shift to the parallel reality where you already have it. no, i don’t mean work out for six months and hope for the best. i mean assume, right now, that you have it, and live as though you do. time is fake, and you don't need it. your cells aren’t checking their watches. you can wake up in two hours with the body you’ve always wanted, because why not? that timeline exists. people have done it. the only thing between you and that reality is the idea that it’s "too unrealistic."
and what’s more unrealistic? the concept of shifting infinite times per second through an ever-expanding multiverse of possibility, or the idea that one of those infinite realities just so happens to contain the exact thing you want and all you have to do is land in it?
anyways. "shifting" and "manifesting" aren’t two different things. they’re just two perspectives on the same mechanism. you shift every second, every moment, all the time. and manifestation is just deliberate shifting. picking the station instead of letting the static choose for you.
so, no more "waiting." no more "how long will it take?" because it’s already happened. the moment you say this is my reality now. congrats. you just shifted.
. . . you can read more about this here <3
#emma motivates#shifting#reality shifting#shifting motivation#desired reality#realityshifting#shifting community#reality shift#shifting realities#loassumption#loa tumblr#loa blog#loablr#loa success#loassblog#neville goddard#law of assumption#manifestation#how to manifest#law of manifestation#master manifestor#manifesting#self concept#shifting to desired reality#desired life#desired self#desired appearance#desired body#shifting reality#shifting advice
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Her Ex Got Engaged
↳ Masterlist
︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶
✯ pairing: Max Verstappen x GF! Reader ✯
✯ content warnings: None✯
︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶
Almost two years had passed since the end of the longest relationship she had ever had. Six years that had introduced her to romantic love—and to romantic deception. She could still picture the subtle yet undeniable shift in his expression as she spoke animatedly about the future she envisioned for them. It wasn’t until much later that she realized that moment had been a warning, a quiet revelation that he did not see her in his.
She soon learned what a breakup truly felt like—the endless crying, the ache in her chest, the unbearable helplessness. Absolute hell.
Looking back, though, she couldn't help but feel grateful for the conversation that ended it all. Painful as it had been, it had given her the clarity she needed. It had hurt—stung far too much—to realize he had known for some time that she was not the one but hadn’t ended things sooner. She had spent too long wondering why. But perhaps, if he had, she wouldn’t be where she was now—with someone who loved her the way she deserved. And for that, she was grateful.
It was late morning, and as Max played with the cats beside her, she scrolled through Instagram stories to see what her friends and other people were up to. Clubbing, dinners, traveling, running—the usual things people posted. She would glance at each for just a second before swiping to the next. But then she stopped, her finger frozen on the screen as she stared, at one point almost vacantly, before tapping on the shared post.
Engaged. She stared blankly at the caption, the single word mocking her. After what—a year? He was already engaged to someone else? How? Max barely glanced at her phone at first, still focused on scratching behind the cat’s ears. But when he noticed the way she had suddenly stilled, eyes fixed on the screen, he leaned in slightly.
“Who’s that?” he asked, peering over her shoulder. “One of your friends?”
She blinked, hesitating a second too long. “Uh—”
Max smirked, nudging her playfully. “Tell me it’s not another wedding. I’m running out of excuses not to go.”
That earned a small, breathy laugh from her, but it wasn’t quite right—too forced. She locked her phone and placed it face-down beside her. “No wedding,” she said lightly. “Don’t worry.”
Max tilted his head. “Then why do you look like you’ve just seen a ghost?”
“I don’t,” she said quickly. “It’s nothing.”
His smirk faded slightly as he studied her face. “It’s someone, though.”
She sighed, knowing there was no way out of this. “My ex,” she admitted. “He got engaged.”
Max’s expression didn’t change immediately. He just stared at her, then let out a quiet huh.
For a second, she thought maybe he wasn’t going to make a big deal out of it. But then, with that signature bluntness of his, he asked,
“So why do you care?”
She turned her head sharply. “I don’t.”
Max gave her a look, eyes flicking to her phone. “You do.”
His eyes met hers again, piercing through her, almost imploring an answer. Why did she care? It had been two years. She was happy—with herself, with him, with her life in general. And yet, it felt like a hard punch to the stomach.
“I don’t know,” she sighed.
Max’s jaw tensed slightly, his fingers drumming against his knee as he studied her. He wasn’t the type to jump to conclusions, but something about this—about her reaction—itched at him in a way he didn’t like.
“You don’t know?” he echoed, his voice quieter now, but there was an edge to it.
She ran a hand through her hair. “I mean, it’s offensive,” she said, trying to explain. “That he just—engaged so fast.”
Max’s brow furrowed. “And that bothers you because…?”
She sighed. “Because it makes me wonder how long he knew I wasn’t the one.”
Max was quiet for a moment, his lips pressing into a thin line. Then, in a tone sharper than before, he asked,
“And do you still care?”
Her head snapped up. “What?”
“About him,” Max clarified, his expression unreadable. “Because you look like someone just punched you, and I don’t know why else you’d be this upset if you were actually over it.”
She blinked, taken aback by the sudden shift in his demeanor.
“Max, no—”
“Because if you’re not happy with me, you should tell me,” he continued, his voice still controlled. “If you still want him—”
“I don’t,” she cut him off, shaking her head firmly. “I swear, I don’t.”
He exhaled, looking away for a second, his fingers tightening into a fist before relaxing. “Then why?” His voice was quieter now, but no less intense. “Why does it feel like you’re still stuck in it?”
She opened her mouth, but the words didn’t come right away. It wasn’t about her ex, not really. It was about time, about the fact that she had spent years loving someone who hadn’t loved her back the same way. It was about realizing that she had been so blind to it.
But looking at Max now—his guarded expression, the slight clench of his jaw, the way his fingers twitched like he wasn’t sure whether to reach for her or pull away—she realized that he didn’t see it that way.
Her chest tightened.
She reached for his hand, curling her fingers around his. “Max, I’m happy, the happiest I’ve ever been,” she said, her voice softer now. “With you. I swear, I don’t want him back. I just—it caught me off guard. That’s all.”
His shoulders didn’t relax immediately, his thumb ghosting over her knuckles as he studied her face, searching for something.
“Are you sure?” he asked, and for all his bluntness, there was something vulnerable about the way he said it.
She squeezed his hand. “I’m sure.”
Max exhaled through his nose, shaking his head slightly like he was mad at himself for even thinking otherwise. Then, finally, he tugged her closer, his hand slipping to the nape of her neck as he rested his forehead against hers.
“I don’t like seeing you like that,” he admitted, his voice quieter now. “And I really don’t like the thought of you still caring about him.”
She smiled, brushing her nose against his. “I don’t.”
His lips barely curved, but the tension in his body faded just slightly.
“Good,” he murmured before kissing her, slow and deliberate, like he was grounding himself in her. Like he was making sure she was here. With him.
Max pulled back just enough to look at her, his hand still cradling the nape of her neck. His expression had softened—still serious, but there was a hint of something else now. Something almost teasing.
“So,” he murmured, thumb brushing absently over her skin. “If you’re so bothered by him getting engaged, you wanna just… get engaged too?”
She blinked. “What?”
Max shrugged, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Yeah, why not? Even the score.”
She scoffed, shoving his shoulder. “Oh, now you want to propose, just to be petty?”
He chuckled, but there was a glint in his eyes, something more thoughtful than his usual teasing. “Maybe. I think we’d look better in engagement photos, anyway.”
She rolled her eyes while smiling.
Max smirked and leaned in again, pressing a lingering kiss to the corner of her mouth before murmuring against her skin, “One day, though.”
Her breath hitched slightly.
He pulled back just enough to meet her gaze, his usual cocky demeanor softened by something undeniably genuine. “Not just to ‘even the score’ or whatever,” he added, his voice quieter now. “But because I want to.”
She swallowed, her heart skipping a beat at the certainty in his tone.
“One day,” she echoed, her lips curving slightly.
Max’s grin widened. “Good, and it will be a much fancier ring than that, okay?.”
She laughed, shaking her head as he pulled her into him again. “Okay.”
︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶
✯ authors note: English is not my first language and I hope you liked it <3
#x reader#formula one#formula one x reader#formula 1#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x reader#max verstappen#mv33#mv1#mv1 x reader#mv33 x reader#mv1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#f1 fanfic#f1#f1 fic#f1 x you#max verstappen fluff#formula 1 imagine#fanfic#red bull f1#f1 one shot#f1 rpf#f1 story#formula one fluff#f1 fluff#formula one fanfiction
485 notes
·
View notes
Text
The Hit List | 02.5
Pairing: fuckgirl!Paige x Mechi Student!reader
Masterlist (TBA) | Part One | Part Two (READ BEFORE 2.5)
Genre: romance, slow burn, enemies to lovers, kinda funny?, they fuck, n its hot n sweaty, cat n mouse
Description: What starts as a game of avoidance turns into something far more dangerous when old grudges and unfinished business crash headfirst into a truth neither of them are ready to face. Armed with a stubborn streak, a boyfriend you're trying too hard to believe in, and a simmering resentment that burns just as hot as desire, you swear you won’t let Paige win.
But when history keeps rewriting itself in glances, in touches, in words that cut too close—you start to wonder if you've had control of the game at all.
wc: 24k, yes, 24k
Authors Note: sorry this took forever, too many words so this is split into two parts (THIS IS part 2 chap 2)
Three Weeks Later
Midterms came and went, dragging you through hell and back. The sleepless nights, the cramming, the fucking Systems Engineering project that nearly made you throw your laptop out a window. It’s over. You survived.
And somewhere in between all of it—Paige Bueckers became just a name again.
Not a person. Not a presence. Not someone orbiting your every waking moment.
Just a name you see online.
A headline when UConn wins another game.
A clip someone reposts on Twitter, her pulling up from three like it’s muscle memory, making it look so goddamn easy.
Her life moves forward at full speed.
The season’s in full swing, meaning the team’s constantly gone—traveling for games, disappearing for days at a time, too busy to be anything but motion.
It’s weird.
Because after that night—after the fucking laundry room, after the way she felt against you, the way her breath tangled with yours—you thought she’d stick. Thought the weight of her would still be there, pressing into your ribs, twisting your stomach every time you caught a glimpse of her across campus. But she’s gone.
Not in the literal sense. You still hear her name, see her in passing, watch her run drills on the court like she owns it. But she’s not here. Not in the way that matters. She’s everywhere else—on screens, in headlines, living a life that no longer overlaps with yours.
And you hate that the only way you see her now is through a fucking phone. A video of her laughing on the sideline, hair damp with sweat, head thrown back like she doesn’t have a care in the world. A post-game interview where she’s loose, confident, rattling off the same media-trained answers like she’s never lost control of anything in her life. She’s fine. She’s thriving.
And the worst part? She probably doesn’t think about you at all.
So you adjust. You fall back into routine. Class. Studying. Work. You go to parties, sometimes. You drink. You dance. You make out with people whose names you don’t bother remembering. You kiss Eli again—once, just to see if it sparks something, if it fills the void she left behind. It doesn’t. It never does.
And then, just as fast as she disappeared—
She’s back.
It happens out of nowhere. One second, you’re dragging yourself through campus, brain fogged with sleep, the winter air biting at your skin, coffee scalding the tip of your tongue. And then—her. Right there. Like she never left. Like she hasn’t spent the last few weeks bouncing between cities, arenas, flashing cameras. Like she isn’t something bigger than all of this.
She’s standing outside the training facility, hoodie pulled over her head, joggers slung low on her hips, a duffel bag hanging off her shoulder. She’s talking to someone—one of her coaches, maybe—but she’s different. Not in the way she looks. No, she’s exactly the same, infuriatingly so. It’s something else, something in the way she carries herself, like she’s spent so much time away from this part of her life that she almost forgot it existed.
Like she almost forgot about you.
Your breath stutters. Your steps slow.
She’s close enough to touch. Close enough to reach out and prove she’s real.
And yet, she might as well be a ghost.
Because when she finally turns, finally glances up—she sees you. You know she does. But there’s nothing. No reaction. No flicker of recognition. No teasing smirk. No raised brow, no knowing glance, nothing. Just a passing look, empty and indifferent, before she turns away.
Like you’re nobody.
Like that night never happened.
Like you never fucking existed.
And it wrecks you. Because for the first time since this whole fucked-up, tangled thing started—
It feels like you lost.
Two Months Later
Dating Eli is easy. That’s the problem.
There’s no push and pull, no fire curling under your ribs, no moments where your pulse spikes so fast you think you might actually combust. There’s no game. No tension. Just quiet, steady comfort. He’s sweet—thoughtful, even. Picks you up for class sometimes, walks you to your dorm even when it’s out of his way, texts you good morning despite seeing you every day. A good boyfriend. The kind you’re supposed to want.
And you? You go through the motions. You hold his hand. Let him kiss you. Let him slip an arm around your shoulders as you walk across campus, even though it still feels foreign. Even though it still feels wrong. But you let it happen because it’s safe. Because he doesn’t make your stomach drop. Because he doesn’t wreck you.
Because he’s not her.
And that’s exactly what you need. Because Paige Bueckers doesn’t know you exist anymore.
She came back from the season like she shed you—like you were just something she outgrew. Whatever happened between you was nothing. A passing thought. A mistake so inconsequential she didn’t even have to acknowledge it. And if she doesn’t care? Then neither do you.
So you lean into Eli.
And when he invites you to a UConn game—something casual, something low-stakes, something he’s excited to take you to—you say yes. You say yes because it makes sense. Because this is your life now. Because Paige Bueckers is just another player on the court.
And that’s all she’s ever going to be.
The stadium is packed, the early spring air crisp, cutting through the warmth of the sun. You follow Eli up the steps, scanning for open seats, the scent of popcorn and hot dogs thick in the air. It’s different from the last time you were at a game. Not indoors, not under the blinding arena lights. The energy is looser, more relaxed, fans chatting easily, kids waving oversized foam fingers.
You take a breath, steadying yourself. It’s fine. It’s just a game. And you’re here with your boyfriend.
Eli finds seats near the middle, pulling you down beside him, arm draping lazily over your shoulders. You lean in, let yourself sink into the warmth of his body, let yourself pretend like this is all normal.
On the court, the team is warming up. Players jog across the pavement, stretching, shaking out their limbs. Your gaze drifts over them, detached, unfocused, not looking for anything in particular—
And then—her.
It shouldn’t feel like a fucking collision, but it does.
Your breath catches, body locking up as if it knew before your brain did. As if some deep, unshakable instinct recognized her presence before you could stop it. Paige jogs across the court, her shorts hanging loose around her thighs, her hoodie still on, dribbling lazily like she doesn’t have a single care in the world. Like she’s untouchable.
Your chest tightens. She still looks the same. Still is the same. And yet—something’s different. Maybe it’s the way she seems even more unreachable now, like she exists in a space just beyond your grasp.
You exhale sharply, force your gaze away.
You’re here with Eli.
You’re fine.
This means nothing.
Eli nudges you. “You good?”
You blink, nodding too quickly. “Yeah. Just thinking.”
He smiles, presses a kiss to the side of your head. “Get ready. She’s gonna put on a show.”
You force a laugh.
And when you chance another glance at the court—Paige is already looking at you.
But this time, she reacts.
Just slightly. Just enough.
A shift in her eyes. A flicker of something.
And then—she smiles.
Not big. Not obvious. Just the barest curve of her lips, like she knows. Like she sees you sitting there, tucked under Eli’s arm, playing house, pretending like you’ve moved on. And for the first time in months, you know—
She hasn’t forgotten you at all.
You don’t watch the game. Not really.
You hear it—the sharp squeak of sneakers against pavement, the shrill whistle of fouls, the deafening roar of the crowd when UConn scores. You see it—the blur of white and navy jerseys cutting across the court.
But your focus is off.
Because all you can feel is the weight of her presence.
And the fact that she knows you’re here.
It fucks with you.
Because it had been easy to believe she forgot. That she let it go, left you in the past, moved on like you were nothing. But now—now she’s looking at you between plays. Not constantly. Not obviously. Just enough.
A glance while she’s standing at the free-throw line, hands on her hips, chest rising and falling. A flicker of her eyes when she jogs back on defense, scanning the crowd, skimming right past Eli like he doesn’t even exist.
And that fucking smirk when she sinks a three-pointer, lets it hang in the air for just a second before she turns, wiping the sweat off her brow with the hem of her jersey.
It’s deliberate. Calculated.
And it’s working.
Heat curls up your spine, a suffocating mix of frustration and something you won’t name. Your arms lock tight across your stomach, fingers curled into your sleeves. Beside you, Eli cheers, completely oblivious.
You wish you could be.
You wish you could tune her out. Pretend she’s just another player on the court. Pretend she doesn’t get under your skin.
But she’s in your head again. She won’t leave.
And worse—she knows it.
The game stretches on, endless. Every second is another reminder that she’s still there. That she’s not just some passing thought, some unfinished mistake. She’s real. She’s here. And she’s still in this fucking thing with you, even if neither of you are saying it out loud.
By the time the final buzzer sounds, you feel like you’ve been through a war.
Eli’s arm tightens around your shoulders, shaking you lightly. “See? Told you she’d put on a show.”
You nod, force a tight smile, but your chest feels hollow, your stomach twisted into something you don’t know how to untangle.
Because the game might be over—
But this?
This is just getting started.
The crowd filters out in waves, a slow, steady stream of bodies stretching stiff limbs, shaking off the lingering chill, still thrumming with energy from the win. Eli stands, his hand warm around yours as he pulls you up with him, his voice easy, unbothered, spilling into the space between you with post-game analysis—stats, highlights, a play he wants to rewatch later.
You nod when you’re supposed to, hum responses that sound just engaged enough, but none of it sticks. Your mind is elsewhere.
Because she’s still here.
Not with the team. Not caught up in post-game celebrations or media duties. No cameras, no noise, no excuses. Just lingering.
Sweat still clings to the curve of her neck, damp strands of blonde hair curling against her skin. Her hoodie is pulled over her head, water bottle hanging loose from her fingers, body relaxed like she has nowhere to be. But she’s not just standing there.
She’s watching.
Not outright. Not obvious. Just enough.
And Eli? He doesn’t notice.
Because why would he? He’s here with his girlfriend, celebrating a win, caught up in the moment, assuming she’s just watching the team clear out, thinking nothing of it.
You, on the other hand—
You can’t fucking breathe.
Every nerve is stretched too tight, buzzing under your skin, prickling like static, like she’s marking you without even touching you. Like she’s still fucking with you, seeing how much space she can take up in your head before you break.
And the worst part?
She looks fine.
Completely untouched. Unshaken. Not like she’s been thinking about you. Not like this has cost her anything.
And that—that is what undoes you.
Because this was supposed to be over.
You were supposed to be fine.
But here you are. Crumbling.
Eli tugs on your sleeve, easy, unaware. “Come on, let’s head out before traffic gets bad.”
You blink, drag yourself back into the present, nodding too quickly. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s go.”
One step.
Then two.
And then—
You don’t mean to look.
But you do.
Just for a second.
And she’s still there.
And she smiles.
Not big. Not obvious. Just that same, slow, knowing curve of her lips.
Like she sees right through you.
Like she knows you’re unraveling.
Like she’s won.
It’s three days after the game when the email comes in.
You don’t think much of it at first, just another facilities request forwarded to you through the engineering department—something about a faulty vent system in the women’s basketball locker room. Nothing urgent, nothing particularly exciting, just another task to check off your list between classes and whatever project is currently draining your soul. You’re barely skimming the details as you type out a confirmation reply, promising to stop by that afternoon, when it hits you.
Women’s basketball locker room.
Your stomach tightens.
For a second, you debate forwarding it off to someone else. Someone more qualified, someone with less history hanging in that space. But that’s fucking ridiculous, isn’t it? It’s been three months. Three months since the laundry room, since she pretended you didn’t exist, since you started playing house with Eli like it was supposed to fix everything. Three months of routine, of pretending you don’t track her name through game highlights and Twitter clips, of pretending you don’t feel her presence like a ghost in the back of your head.
You should be fine.
This shouldn’t be a thing.
It’s a fucking vent. You’re going to walk in, tighten some screws, maybe clean out a filter, and walk right back out. No big deal.
And yet, as you step into the building later that afternoon, tool bag slung over your shoulder, the cold press of the metal door handle beneath your palm, you feel something coil tight in your chest, something uneasy and electric, something that tells you this won’t be as easy as you want it to be.
The locker room is quiet when you step inside, the kind of silence that feels thick, like it’s waiting to be broken. The scent of sweat and body wash lingers in the air, fresh from practice, steam still clinging faintly from the showers in the back. Rows of lockers stretch across the room, some still open, jerseys draped lazily over the benches, sneakers kicked off in pairs on the floor.
You exhale slowly, adjusting the strap of your bag as you move toward the vent panel along the far wall. The faster you do this, the faster you can leave. You crouch, fingers working quickly to loosen the first few screws, trying to focus on the movement, the mechanics, anything but the slight tremble in your hands, anything but—
“Didn’t think I’d see you in here.”
The voice is unmistakable.
That low, casual drawl, edged in something sharper, something teasing, something that shouldn’t still make your breath catch the way it does.
You don’t turn immediately.
You keep working, keep your gaze locked on the vent, pretend like your pulse hasn’t just doubled. “Just fixing a maintenance issue,” you say, voice as even as you can manage. “Won’t be here long.”
There’s a pause, a shift of movement, the unmistakable sound of sneakers against tile. She’s coming closer.
“Shame,” Paige murmurs, and fuck, you feel it.
The weight of her gaze. The presence of her body somewhere behind you, close enough to make the air feel different, charged, suffocating.
You grip the screwdriver tighter.
She shouldn’t be here. Not now, not after all this time, not when you’ve spent months convincing yourself she doesn’t matter.
But she is.
And she’s talking to you.
You swallow, working another screw loose, forcing yourself to focus. “Shouldn’t you be at practice?”
She hums, and you hear the smile in it before you see it. “Finished early.” A pause, and then, “Didn’t know you were doing this kind of work.”
Your jaw tightens.
Of course, she didn’t. Because you don’t exist in her world anymore, do you? Not unless she decides you do.
You finally turn, slowly, pushing up from your crouch, letting yourself look at her.
And fuck, that was a mistake.
Because she looks good, better than you remember, the months of training and travel and games only sharpening her in ways that make your stomach twist. She’s standing there in sweatpants and a UConn tee, hair damp from a post-practice shower, arms crossed over her chest, watching you like she’s curious, like she’s interested, like she hasn’t spent three months pretending you were just another passing face in the crowd.
And it pisses you off.
You force a shrug, tilting your head slightly. “Didn’t know you cared what I was doing.”
Her smirk twitches. Just barely. Just enough.
“Didn’t say I did,” she replies smoothly, but the way she’s watching you says otherwise.
There it is.
The push and pull. The old game slipping back into place like it never left, like three months of avoidance didn’t mean shit.
And you should walk away. You should finish the job and leave, act like you don’t feel this, act like she’s just another person in another room.
But you don’t.
Because something deep in you, something bitter and unresolved and desperate, needs to know if this still means something.
So you take a step closer, watching the flicker in her eyes as you do.
“Then why are you standing here?” you ask, voice low, steady, challenging.
Paige doesn’t move. Doesn’t step back, doesn’t flinch, just holds your gaze, her mouth curving slightly, like she’s enjoying this, like she knows she’s getting to you.
“Maybe I’m just curious,” she says, tilting her head. “Been a while, hasn’t it?”
Three months.
Three months of silence. Three months of pretending. Three months of you thinking you were the only one who remembered, the only one who cared, the only one still feeling it.
And now?
Now she’s standing here, looking at you like she never forgot at all.
You don’t answer.
Because what is there to say? That, yeah, it’s been a while, and yet somehow it still feels like she never left your fucking head? That you’ve spent the past three months trying to scrub the memory of her hands off your skin, only to have them crawl back the second you laid eyes on her again? That seeing her at the game did something to you—something ugly, something desperate, something you don’t want to name?
No.
You won’t give her that.
So instead, you just lift a brow, forcing something casual onto your face, like her presence isn’t making your chest feel too tight. “Yeah. Guess it has.”
Paige watches you for a second longer, and you can see it happening—her weighing the moment, deciding how she wants to play this. Because that’s what she does, isn’t it? She plays. Gives you something, just a taste, just enough to make your stomach flip, before she rips it away.
And you should know better by now.
You do know better.
But then she shifts, weight rolling back onto one foot, arms still folded, her mouth quirking into that slow, almost lazy smirk—the one that’s never meant nothing.
“So,” she says, tilting her head, “are you gonna keep ignoring me, or are we past that now?”
Your pulse stutters.
Your fingers tighten around the screwdriver in your hand.
You weren’t expecting that.
For her to just say it. To acknowledge it, to drag it into the light, the weight of your silence, the way you spent months dodging her like it might actually fix you.
You scoff, shaking your head, turning back to the vent, to anything that isn’t her mouth forming words that fuck you up. “I haven’t been ignoring you.”
It’s a lie.
Paige knows it’s a lie.
She steps closer—just enough that you can feel the shift of air between you, just enough that you catch the faint scent of her shampoo, something fresh, something clean, something too close.
“You sure?” she murmurs. “Because it kinda seemed like you were.”
Your teeth clench.
She’s doing it again.
The push and pull. The little tug, just enough to make you stumble, to throw you off balance, to remind you exactly who you’re dealing with.
You exhale slowly through your nose, focus on the screw you’re twisting into place, force your voice to stay neutral. “You seemed fine with it.”
There’s a pause. Just for a beat. Just long enough that you think maybe—maybe—you landed something.
Then—soft, amused—Paige says, “You think that?”
And it’s not fair.
The way she says it, the way it slides under your skin, the way it makes your chest squeeze, makes you feel fucking stupid for believing, even for a second, that maybe she really had forgotten you.
Your fingers tighten around the screwdriver.
She’s playing with you.
And the worst part?
You let her.
You don’t turn. Don’t face her. Don’t give her the satisfaction.
But your voice is quieter when you say, “Why do you even care?”
Another pause.
Then—
“Maybe I don’t.”
Your stomach drops.
It’s so fucking typical. Just when you think she’s giving you something, just when she pulls you an inch closer, she yanks it away.
You clench your jaw, inhale sharply, force yourself to stay still.
And then—because you refuse to let her win this—you huff a soft laugh, shaking your head. “Right. Of course.”
You finish tightening the last screw, closing the panel, standing up. You finally turn to her, tilting your head slightly, forcing something light onto your face, like you’re fine, like she isn’t doing what she always fucking does.
“Well,” you say, slipping the screwdriver back into your bag. “It’s been great catching up, but I have shit to do.”
You move to step past her.
But she shifts, blocking your path.
Not aggressively. Not obviously.
Just enough.
Just enough that you have to stop.
Just enough that you have to look at her.
Paige licks her lips, considering you, and her voice is quieter this time, almost thoughtful. “You don’t like when I do that, do you?”
Your stomach tightens.
You keep your face neutral. “Do what?”
She tilts her head slightly. “Give you something, then take it away.”
You swallow.
Because the fact that she’s saying it out loud—naming it, acknowledging it—makes your chest squeeze so hard it’s almost painful.
You force a shrug. “You do whatever you want, Paige.”
You step around her, adjusting the strap of your bag like the conversation hasn’t just sunk claws into your spine, like you aren’t already burning up from the inside out. You throw one last casual glance over your shoulder, just to make a point, just to show her this doesn’t fucking matter.
And then—
“Is he your boyfriend?”
It’s smooth, deliberate, cutting through the silence with the ease of a well-placed knife.
Your body goes rigid.
Not enough to be noticeable. Not enough to give her the satisfaction. But she notices.
You school your face into something neutral before turning back to her. “Yeah.”
The second the word leaves your mouth, Paige scoffs. Then—slow, quiet, like she’s really thinking about it—she laughs.
It’s not loud. It’s not obvious. But it hits.
It slides under your skin, needles into your chest, presses against something raw and unsettled.
You know exactly what she’s laughing at.
Not at Eli, not really.
She’s laughing at you.
At the fact that you’re standing here, pretending like that word doesn’t feel foreign in your mouth, like it doesn’t taste like something you don’t quite believe.
At the fact that you’ve spent months throwing yourself into a version of reality where he is the answer.
At the fact that she knows—she fucking knows—that if he really was, you wouldn’t be here.
Your throat tightens.
You square your shoulders. “Something funny?”
Paige shakes her head, smirk barely there, but sharp. “Nah.” A pause, her gaze flicking over you like she’s amused, like she’s bored. “Just wasn’t expecting that.”
Your fingers curl around the strap of your bag, tight enough to sting.
She tilts her head slightly. “Does he know you’re here?”
You force your jaw not to clench. “Why would it matter?”
Paige hums, the sound lazy, almost dismissive. “It wouldn’t.”
You don’t know why that lands deeper than it should, why it hits like something solid in your chest.
She doesn’t fucking care.
You exhale sharply, roll your shoulders, force yourself to act like you don’t feel like she just pressed a finger right against something bruised inside you.
“Well,” you say, tone light, detached, like this whole conversation hasn’t just put a fucking stone in your stomach, “great catching up.”
And this time, when you walk out—when you force your feet to move, when you push through the door into the cooler hallway air—you don’t look back.
You don’t have to.
Because you can still feel her there.
Still hear the low echo of her laugh.
Still fucking feel her.
And you hate that it still makes your chest tighten.
The locker room door swings shut behind you, but the conversation doesn’t leave with it.
It sticks.
It clings to your skin, coils in your stomach, presses into your ribs like something sharp and unshakable.
You walk down the hallway fast, like you can outrun the weight of her laugh in your ears, like you can erase the way she looked at you when she said that’s your boyfriend?—like the words weren’t just words, like they were something else, something heavier, something soaked in disbelief and mockery.
You should be over her by now.
But then why does your skin still burn? Why does your pulse still hammer against the inside of your wrist? Why does the way she said it—casual, unbothered, like it didn’t even fucking matter—make something in you want to break?
The night stretches out after that, long and restless. You try to study, but you can’t focus. You try to sleep, but every time you close your eyes, she’s there. Her smirk. Her scoff. The way she laughed like you were a joke. Like he was a joke.
You spend the next week avoiding places where you might run into her, avoiding anywhere that makes you feel like a live wire, avoiding thinking about her—
And it works.
Until it doesn’t.
Because the thing about Paige Bueckers is that she has a way of creeping back in, of making herself known, of pulling you back into her orbit whether you want to be there or not.
It happens at another party.
A packed house, music pulsing through the walls, the kind of night where people are drinking like they’re trying to forget something, where everything feels just a little too loud, a little too bright, a little too much.
You’re standing in the kitchen, fingers curled around a red cup, Eli close behind you, talking to someone you don’t know. His hand is warm where it rests on your hip, an absentminded touch, a casual claim.
It’s fine.
You’re fine.
Until you’re not.
Until your eyes flicker past the crowd, past the shifting bodies and pulsing bass, past the open doorway—
And land right on her.
Paige is in the next room, leaning against the wall, head tilted, that lazy, practiced ease draped over her like armor. She’s watching something—someone. A girl. Pretty. Brunette. Standing too close, laughter spilling past glossy lips as she hangs on whatever Paige just said.
Paige isn’t even touching her. Doesn’t need to. Just standing there, looking, smirking, waiting. And the worst part? You know exactly what she’s doing.
Like she could have her if she wanted.
Like it’s not even a fucking question.
Your stomach knots, tight and hot. Not with jealousy—no, it’s worse than that. It’s recognition.
Because you know what it’s like to be on the other side of that look.
You know what it’s like to be wanted by her.
The ghost of it slams into you like a fist to the ribs—how it felt to have those eyes locked on you, sharp and knowing, pinning you down like a game she was already winning. How it felt when she had you right there and she knew it.
Your grip tightens around your cup, fingers digging in like it’s the only thing holding you together. Your breath stutters, the air too thick, the room suddenly too small.
She hasn’t seen you yet.
She’s too caught up in her game, too wrapped up in not caring.
So you do the same.
You force yourself to turn back to Eli, to play your part. You smile, lean into his touch, let him press his lips to your temple like it’s easy, like it’s nothing. Like it means something.
And maybe it works.
Maybe it doesn’t.
Because when you chance another glance—just for a second—
Paige is already looking at you.
And this time—
She smirks.
Slow. Deliberate. Like she’s been waiting for you to look. Like she knows exactly what she’s doing. Like she knows exactly how much space she still takes up in your fucking head.
And that’s when you snap.
You don’t think.
You move.
Your cup clatters onto the counter, liquid sloshing over the rim, but you don’t care. You slip out of Eli’s reach, push through the crowd—away, anywhere, somewhere with air that doesn’t taste like her.
Your pulse is a riot, hammering against your ribs, deafening in your ears as you shove past people pressed against walls, past laughter and voices swallowed by the music, past the tight, choking heat in your chest.
Your hands are shaking. Your breath is uneven. You need a second.
Just one fucking second to breathe—
And then—
A door swings open, and suddenly—
She’s right there.
Paige.
Still smirking.
Still looking like she has all the time in the world.
Still making your stomach feel like it’s caving in on itself.
Your chest rises and falls too fast, heat crawling up your neck, pooling low in your stomach, everywhere.
She leans against the doorway, casual as ever, the light behind her casting long shadows over the sharp angles of her face. She looks obnoxiously good, like she knows exactly how lethal she is.
She tilts her head. “What’s wrong?” she murmurs, voice low, teasing, like she already knows the answer.
And fuck her.
Fuck her for this.
For knowing you this well.
For still knowing you this well.
You shove past her, shoulder knocking against hers, but she moves at the last second, stepping just enough to block you—
And then—her hand.
Fingers curling around your wrist. Not hard. Not pulling. Just there.
You suck in a sharp breath.
She’s not holding you here. Not keeping you against your will.
But she doesn’t let go.
And neither do you.
The air between you crackles, thick, heavy, dangerous. The weight of something unsaid presses into your ribs, clinging to your skin, wrapping around you like a fucking chokehold.
Paige watches you.
And this time—
She doesn’t laugh.
She doesn’t smirk.
She waits.
And maybe—just maybe—
This time, you’re the one who moves first.
The space between you is electric, charged, something twisting tight in your chest like a live wire ready to snap. The hallway is dim, shadows stretching long against the walls, muffling the noise of the party outside, trapping you in this thing you’ve been running from for months.
Paige’s fingers are still around your wrist, not tight, not forcing—just there, anchoring you, keeping you from bolting like you probably should. Her eyes flicker over your face, searching, waiting, and fuck, you hate how easily she does this, how effortlessly she pulls you back into her gravity like you were never gone at all.
Your breath is uneven. Your pulse is pounding in your throat, but your voice is steady when you say, “What game are you playing at?”
She blinks, just once, slow and measured. Then the corner of her mouth curves, something smug, something dangerous. “Don’t you have a boyfriend?”
Your stomach drops, rage curling up into your throat so fast it makes your vision go sharp.
You shove her.
Harder than you should, more than just frustration, more than just anger. It’s months of this—of her pushing, pulling, giving you something and then acting like it never fucking happened. It’s her laugh in the locker room, her smirk at the game, the way she looked at you through the crowd like she was daring you to react, to feel. It’s all of it—the way she still owns you and acts like she doesn’t even care.
Paige stumbles back a step, but her hand never leaves you.
Instead, she grabs your other arm, fingers tight around your biceps, steadying herself, steadying you. Her grip is firm, strong, the heat of her palms burning through your sleeves.
Her smirk is gone.
And when she speaks again, her voice is different. Lower. Rougher.
“I’m not playing at a game.”
Your breath catches.
Because it’s not cocky. It’s not teasing. It’s real.
Her hands flex slightly on your arms, like she’s bracing herself, like she needs you to hear this.
And you do.
It sinks under your skin, gets lodged somewhere between your ribs, breaks something open inside of you that you’ve been trying to keep sealed shut.
Your heart is hammering. Your whole body is buzzing, tight, waiting.
Paige is still holding you.
And she’s so fucking close.
You can feel her breath against your lips, can see the flicker in her eyes, the way her chest is rising and falling just as fast as yours.
You don’t know who moves first.
Maybe it’s her. Maybe it’s you. Maybe it’s both of you at the same fucking time, colliding like you were never meant to be anything but this.
Your mouths crash together, hot and desperate, months of tension unraveling all at once, burning through every nerve in your body.
Paige exhales sharply against you, hands tightening around your arms before sliding up, up, framing your face, pulling you deeper into it, like she’s afraid you might disappear again.
You fist the fabric of her hoodie, dragging her into you, needing her closer, needing more.
Her body presses against yours, her lips insistent, rough, a little reckless, like she’s been waiting for this just as long as you have.
The hallway feels too small, the walls too close, your hands too desperate where they roam—her waist, her shoulders, the sharp edge of her jaw.
Paige groans softly against your mouth, and it wrecks you.
It fucking destroys you.
Because it’s real.
Because she wants this.
Because for the first time, she’s not taking it away.
You don’t stop.
Neither does she.
It’s all heat, all breath, all want. Paige’s mouth is rough, greedy, like she’s making up for every second you’ve spent apart, every time she pretended she didn’t see you, every time she smirked at you like this was just a game. Her hands are everywhere—your waist, your back, gripping the fabric of your shirt like she’d die if she let go.
You’re no better.
Your fingers fist in her hoodie, tugging her closer, dragging her against you, needing her body against yours, needing her to feel what she’s doing to you. The hallway barely exists anymore—the party, the noise, Eli—none of it fucking matters. Just her. Just her mouth, her hands, the way she kisses you like she’s starving for it.
Then, between kisses, between desperate little gasps, she murmurs it.
“I need you, baby.”
It wrecks you.
Fucking destroys you.
The word slips out easy, unthinking, raw. Not teasing, not smug, not calculated. Just real.
Your breath catches.
Paige must feel the way your body reacts, the way your nails dig into her arms, the way your hips press forward into hers, because she groans against your mouth and drags her teeth over your bottom lip.
You’re moving before you can think.
Paige is pushing you, guiding you back, back, until your shoulder blades hit a door, until she’s fumbling with the handle, barely breaking the kiss long enough to shove it open.
The room is dark, empty. Some random spare bedroom, barely furnished, barely even fucking registered because the second the door slams shut, Paige is on you again.
Her hands slide under your shirt, rough palms dragging up your ribs, fingertips pressing hard, desperate. Your breath is uneven, your body thrumming with something electric, something you can’t stop, something you don’t want to stop.
You don’t think.
You don’t need to think.
You just pull her hoodie up over her head, fingers tangling in the fabric for a second before it’s gone, discarded somewhere on the floor. Paige exhales sharply as you press into her, as your mouth moves against her jaw, down her throat, tasting, taking.
Her fingers slip into your hair, tugging just enough to make you feel it, enough to make you moan against her skin.
“Fuck,” she mutters, voice rough, breathless, like she’s unraveling, like you’re doing this to her.
You are.
And she fucking loves it.
Her hands move lower, sliding over your hips, gripping tight, like she’s anchoring herself, like she can’t stop touching you, like she’s making sure you’re real.
You kiss her again, harder, messier, pushing her back until her legs hit the edge of the bed, until you’re both toppling onto it, tangled together, all mouths and hands and heat.
Paige knows she’s winning.
You can see it in her eyes, the slow drag of them over your body, the way she takes her time, drinking in every reaction like she’s cataloging them, memorizing what makes you shiver, what makes you squirm, what makes your breath hitch in your throat.
She still likes the game.
She still likes to play.
But this time, she isn’t letting you pull away.
This time, she’s going to take everything.
Her fingers skim over your stomach, slow, teasing, just enough to make you feel it but not enough to satisfy anything. Her mouth follows, lips pressing soft, lingering kisses down, down, down, like she has all the time in the world.
Your head tilts back against the pillows, eyes fluttering shut, but then she stops.
She stops completely.
The heat of her, the weight of her, everything—just gone.
Your eyes snap open, and she’s just looking at you, smug, comfortable, settled between your legs like she owns this moment, like she knows she has you right where she wants you.
Her fingers trail up your thigh, featherlight, barely there.
“You want this?”
Your stomach clenches.
She knows the answer.
She fucking knows.
You glare at her, shifting under her touch, frustrated, dizzy, so strung out you can barely think. “Paige—”
She smiles. Slow. Wicked.
And then, just as easily, “Say it.”
Your breath shudders out of you.
Because this?
This is her game.
She wants to hear you admit it. She wants to make you admit it.
She wants you to lose.
Your fingers dig into the sheets, your pulse a steady riot in your throat, in your wrists, between your legs where she still hasn’t fucking touched you.
But you can’t play this game forever.
Not when she already owns you.
Not when she already knows.
Your voice is thin when you say it.
“I want you.”
And the second the words leave your mouth—
She moves.
Paige grins, low and satisfied, and then she finally stops playing.
She knows she has you, like she’s been waiting for this moment, dragging it out, savoring every second of watching you come undone beneath her. She doesn’t rush. She doesn’t give you everything all at once. No, she takes her time, letting her fingers trace the curve of your hip, pressing light, teasing kisses down your stomach, exhaling slow like she’s enjoying this, like this is just as much for her as it is for you.
You’re burning alive.
Your breath is uneven, your hands twisting in the sheets, thighs already trembling with the anticipation of her next move. But she doesn’t move—not in the way you need her to.
Instead, she just looks at you.
From between your legs, eyes dark, lips parted, expression unreadable, like she’s still deciding how she wants to do this.
Your stomach clenches.
“Paige—”
She presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh, slow, deliberate, her nails digging in just slightly when she grips your hips, holding you in place.
“Shh, baby,” she murmurs, and fuck, there it is again.
That word.
Casual, unthinking, sliding out of her mouth like she doesn’t even realize she’s saying it. Like she means it.
You shudder.
Paige notices. Of course, she does.
Her smirk curves against your skin, and then—
She finally stops playing.
The first press of her mouth sends a raw, electric jolt through you, your hips jerking up on instinct, fingers clawing into her hair like you’ll die if you let go. But she’s already moving—already fucking dragging this out like she wants you begging, like she’s savoring every second of your desperation. Her tongue flickers, slow and teasing, pressing, stroking, curling, soaking you with her hunger, her need.
She moans against your cunt like she’s been fucking starving for it. Like she’s been waiting, aching, dreaming of this moment for weeks, and now that she’s got you open beneath her, there’s no way she’s letting you go easy.
She drags it out.
Like she wants to ruin you.
Like she wants to tear you apart and put you back together with her tongue.
Your nails scrape against her scalp, hard enough to hurt, but she only groans, only pushes deeper, her tongue slipping, flicking, thrusting into the dripping heat of you. You’re gasping now, thighs trembling, back arching, breath catching in desperate, broken moans you can’t even bite back. You can feel her smirk, the way she’s reveling in it, the way she’s enjoying every single fucking sound you make for her.
Her fingers press in, spreading you, holding you open, her tongue working, her lips sucking, teasing, devouring—like she’s trying to drink every last drop of you. The obscene, wet sounds of her mouth on you make you whimper, make you grind down against her, make you clutch her hair so tight she groans into your slick heat.
Your body is shaking.
Paige tightens her grip, keeps you there, keeps you spread for her, keeps you exactly where she wants you—helpless, ruined, fucking wrecked on her tongue.
And just when you think you can’t take it anymore—just when the pleasure coils so tight in your stomach it’s about to snap—she fucking speeds up.
And you’re gone.
You don’t know if you scream her name. You don’t know if you sob it. But the pleasure detonates inside you like a fucking bomb, ripping through your body, setting every nerve on fire, leaving you shaking, gasping, falling apart beneath her mouth.
When you finally come back down—breathless, wrecked, soaked and still trembling—Paige is looking up at you from between your legs, her lips swollen, her chin glistening, her eyes dark and wicked.
Paige’s brow quirks up and she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, slow and deliberate, her eyes never leaving yours. You’re still gasping, still trembling, your body melted into the mattress, legs spread, thighs twitching from the aftershocks of what she just did to you. But she doesn’t move away. Doesn’t crawl up to lie beside you, doesn’t give you a second to catch your breath.
She licks her lips, smirks, and says, “I’m not done with you.”
And then she’s moving.
Crawling back up onto the bed, her body sliding over yours, her hands gripping your thighs, spreading you wider before she finally lets her weight press down. Her skin is hot, slick, her breath heavy and sweet, her thigh slotting between yours as she pins you there beneath her.
Then she grabs your tits.
No teasing, no hesitation—she palms them, squeezes, kneads, rolling the soft flesh in her hands like she owns you, like she’s claiming every inch of you all over again. Her thumbs flick over your nipples, once, twice, before she leans down and takes one into her mouth.
The heat of her tongue, the wet pull of her lips—it makes you cry out, makes you arch into her, makes your hands fly up to grip her head as she sucks, hard, her teeth scraping just enough to make your whole body jolt.
“Fuck,” you whimper, thighs clenching around her, but she just chuckles against your skin, her mouth latching onto your other nipple, her fingers tweaking and rolling the one she just left wet and swollen.
Then her hand moves up.
She grabs your chin, tilts your face up, and before you can even process it—
She shoves her fingers into your mouth.
Her fingers, still wet from you, slip past your lips, pressing against your tongue, forcing you to taste yourself as she pushes them deeper. Your lips part around them, your tongue curling against the salty-slick heat of her touch, a soft, helpless whimper slipping from your throat.
Paige groans at the sight, eyes dark, lips parted, her fingers flexing inside your mouth before she pulls them out—
And spits.
Right into your mouth.
A hot, wet drop onto your waiting tongue, mixing with your taste, with the slickness she just forced you to swallow.
“Swallow it,” she breathes, her voice thick, rough, her fingers trailing down your throat as you do exactly what she fucking tells you.
And then her hand is between your legs again, fingers slipping through your soaked, throbbing heat, pressing in, pushing deep—
Fucking you all over again.
Paige’s fingers drive deep, knuckles sinking into the wet heat of you, her palm grinding against your swollen clit as you gasp, as you choke on the pleasure, your body arching into her touch like you can’t help it. Like you’re made for this. Made for her.
"Fuck—yeah," she groans, watching you, watching the way your body reacts to her. "You feel that? Feel how fucking good I make you take it?"
Your breath stutters, your hips rolling down against her hand, your mouth falling open, nothing but desperate little whimpers spilling from your lips.
Paige smirks, dark and wicked, pressing in deeper, curling her fingers just right, just enough to have you fucking shaking. "Bet he never got you this wet, huh?" she taunts, her voice thick with heat, with possession. "Bet he never made you moan like this."
Your fingers clutch at her shoulders, nails digging in, your head tilting back against the pillows as she fucks into you, slow but deep, deliberate, like she’s making a point. Like she’s proving something.
"You wanna lie to me?" she murmurs, lips brushing your ear, her breath hot against your skin. "Wanna tell me he’s ever made you come like this? That he’s ever had you dripping down his fingers like a desperate little slut?"
You whimper, shaking your head, unable to speak, unable to do anything but take it.
"That’s what I thought," she breathes, grinning against your throat, her teeth scraping over your pulse before she drags her tongue along your skin. "That little boyfriend of yours wouldn’t know what to do with this pussy if it fucking begged him."
She pulls her fingers out, slow and teasing, leaving you empty, aching—only to shove them back in, hard, deep, her palm slapping against your soaked skin as you sob, as you fucking fall apart.
"He ever make you scream?" she growls, fucking you rougher, faster, her fingers pressing against that spot inside you that makes your whole body jolt. "He ever make you soak the sheets like this?"
Your back bows, pleasure slamming through you, your nails raking down her back.
"You’re fucking mine," Paige groans, her mouth on your jaw, your throat, her tongue tasting the sweat on your skin. "This pussy? It’s mine now. Say it."
You barely manage to breathe out the words—"It’s yours"—before she presses her palm against your clit, her fingers curling just right, and you break.
Pleasure rips through you, white-hot and shattering, your whole body shaking, your vision going hazy as you come, as Paige fucks you through it, as she watches you, revels in it, grins like she just fucking ruined you.
And she did.
She fucking did.
——-
You wake slowly, the kind of slow that doesn’t feel like rest. The kind that feels like being pulled from something deep and heavy, like your body’s been wrung out and put back together all wrong. The sheets are soft, warm, unfamiliar, and there’s a weight draped over your hip—solid, steady, too much. Your breath stutters before your brain even catches up.
Paige.
She’s there.
Heat ghosts against the back of your neck, steady and unhurried, the rhythm of her breathing lulling, like sleep still has a hold on her. Her arm is slung around your waist, fingers curled lazily against your stomach, like she belongs there. Like she’s never left before.
And that—that is what makes your chest tighten.
Because this isn’t just some drunken mistake. This isn’t heat or tension or something you can chalk up to unresolved bullshit. This is her in your space, in your bed, in the quiet after. And she’s never stayed before.
Your pulse kicks up, your fingers twitch against the sheets. Last night slams into you all at once—the scrape of her teeth, the press of her hands, the way she looked at you, like she was done playing. Like she wasn’t giving you a choice anymore.
Your stomach clenches.
You don’t know what to do with this.
With her.
So you move, slow, careful, trying not to wake her as you shift out from under her arm. But the second you pull away, Paige stirs, her breath hitching, her grip tightening for just a fraction of a second before her eyes flutter open.
She blinks at you, still groggy, still soft, and for one, dangerous moment, she doesn’t say anything.
She just looks at you.
And you can’t breathe.
Then, just as quickly as it came, the softness vanishes.
Paige stretches, rolls onto her back, runs a hand through her hair, like she does this all the time, like she’s just woken up from any other night, not this one.
“Morning,” she mutters, voice rough with sleep.
You swallow, force yourself to move, force yourself to sit up and swing your legs off the bed. You don’t look at her.
“Yeah,” you say, clearing your throat. “Morning.”
You feel her watching you.
Feel her waiting.
For what, you don’t know.
But when you stand, reaching for your clothes, Paige finally speaks again.
“You leaving?”
Your fingers curl into the fabric of your shirt.
You could stay. You could let this morning linger, let whatever this is stretch out just a little longer.
But the longer you stay, the harder it’ll be to pretend like this isn’t something.
So you nod, still not looking at her. “Yeah.”
Paige exhales through her nose, shifts behind you, and you expect her to let it go, to brush it off like she always does.
Instead—
“You gonna tell him?”
Your stomach drops.
You don’t need to ask who she means.
Eli.
The name rings in your head like a warning, like something cold and sharp, and you hate that she’s the one who brought it up, that she’s the one forcing you to look at it when you were this close to just leaving without dealing with the weight of it.
You squeeze your eyes shut for half a second before turning to face her.
Paige is propped up on one elbow now, watching you with something unreadable in her expression, like she’s testing you, like she’s seeing if you’ll break first.
You lick your lips, pulse hammering. “That’s none of your business.”
Paige’s lips twitch, and for a second, you think she’s going to let it go.
But then—
She scoffs. Shakes her head. Leans back against the headboard with a lazy, almost bored kind of smirk.
“Right. Forgot you’re still playing house with him.”
Your whole body goes rigid.
She’s doing it again.
Tugging at you, pushing you, seeing what you’ll do.
Your jaw clenches, fingers fisting into the hem of your shirt. “I’m not playing anything.”
Paige hums, unconvinced. “Sure. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”
Something inside you snaps.
Because how dare she?
How dare she act like you’re the one playing games when she’s the one who ignored you for three months? When she’s the one who smirked at you across a fucking stadium like she knew she had you? When she’s the one who—
You exhale sharply, shaking your head, forcing yourself to breathe.
This is exactly what she wants.
So you don’t give it to her.
You pull your shirt over your head, reach for your shoes, straighten up.
Then, voice even, you say, “This didn’t mean anything, right?”
It’s a test.
You can see the flicker in her eyes, the quick way her throat bobs as she swallows.
But it’s gone in an instant.
Paige shrugs, casual, careless, like she’s already over it.
“Right,” she echoes. “Just a good time.”
Your chest tightens.
You don’t know what answer you wanted, but that—
That wasn’t it.
You nod once, sharp, then turn for the door.
And this time, you don’t fucking stop.
The door slams behind you, the force of it rattling down your spine, but you don’t stop moving.
You storm down the hallway, your breath sharp, hands curled into fists, every nerve in your body buzzing like a live wire. You don’t let yourself think. Thinking would mean feeling, and you can’t—won’t—give her that.
Not after what she just said.
Not after this didn’t mean anything, right?
Not after she agreed with you.
Just a good time.
That’s all it was. That’s all she wants.
You push through the front door, stepping into the cold air outside, your breath coming fast, too shallow, like you just ran ten miles. You shove your hands into the front pocket of your hoodie, fingers curling against the fabric, trying to ground yourself, trying to—
Your phone rings.
Or at least, you think it’s your phone.
The vibration against your palm jolts you, and you pull it out, ready to decline the call, ready to shut the entire fucking world out.
But then—
You see the name.
Taylor.
Your breath catches.
Your chest tightens.
The cold bites at your skin, but suddenly, it’s like everything else stops.
Because this isn’t your phone.
This isn’t your hoodie.
You look down at yourself, the oversized sleeves, the familiar weight of the fabric, the scent clinging to it—her scent.
Paige’s hoodie.
Paige’s fucking phone.
And Taylor is calling.
Your stomach lurches.
Right back where you started.
The phone keeps ringing, vibrating steadily in your hand, demanding something from you that you can’t give.
You stare at the screen, at the name that shouldn’t be your problem, at the proof of what Paige just walked away from.
And something inside you snaps.
You spin on your heel, shoving back through the front door, retracing your steps, moving fast, fueled by something you don’t even have a name for.
You don’t knock.
You don’t hesitate.
You shove the door open, expecting her to be there, expecting her to still be sitting on that bed with her legs spread and that fucking look on her face, smug and satisfied and untouchable.
But she’s gone.
Just fucking gone.
Like she was never here at all.
The phone stops ringing.
Silence.
You stand there, chest heaving, hoodie too big on you, your fingers still curled around a phone that doesn’t belong to you.
The phone is still warm in your hand.
It shouldn’t matter. It’s just a piece of plastic, just a screen with a name that shouldn’t be your problem. But it is. The weight of it presses against your palm, solid and damning, the name Taylor burned into your retinas, a fucking mockery of everything that just happened.
Paige left.
Vanished like this was nothing, like she didn’t just dig her fingers into you and pull you under, like she didn’t just whisper your name against your skin, like she didn’t just look you in the eye and say just a good time before slipping away like a fucking ghost.
Like she didn’t just ruin you.
And if she thinks she gets to walk away from this untouched—
She’s wrong.
Your feet move before your brain even catches up, before you can think about how reckless this is, before you can stop yourself from doing exactly what she wants. Because you already know where she is.
Where she always is.
The athletic facility is quieter than usual this late at night, the halls dimly lit, silent except for the distant hum of vending machines and the soft squeak of your shoes against the polished floors. But the second you push through the doors to the locker room—
The silence shatters.
Laughter.
Voices overlapping, casual, easy, still thrumming from practice, still buzzing with energy. The kind of normalcy that makes your blood boil, because your world is fucking spinning and yet—
She’s here.
Paige is here.
Leaning against the lockers, towel draped around her neck, a lazy grin curling at her lips as she listens to something one of the girls is saying. Loose. Relaxed. Unbothered.
Like she didn’t just leave you standing in the wreckage she made.
Heat slams into your ribs, a pulse of something violent and ugly crackling under your skin. Your fingers tighten around the phone, nails digging in, breath sharp and unsteady. And before you even fully register what you’re doing—
You move.
The door swings shut behind you with a slam, the force of it cutting through the noise, making heads turn, making conversation die mid-sentence.
Paige doesn’t move.
Doesn’t flinch.
But her shoulders go rigid for half a second before she shifts—casual, calm, fucking unhurried.
Like she already knows it’s you.
Like she felt you coming before she even looked.
And when she finally does—
The smirk is already forming.
Already settling into place like armor. Like a mask. Like she thinks she still has control of this.
But she doesn’t.
You stop in front of her, too close, way too close, enough to make the other girls shift where they stand, enough to make the laughter fully die out, enough to make the air feel thick.
Paige stays leaned against the lockers, pretending, but her eyes flicker over you, sharp and calculating.
Assessing.
Waiting.
So you don’t make her wait long.
You lift the phone, hold it up between you. Let her see it. Let her know why you’re here.
And then—voice low, rough, barely steady under the weight of your fucking anger—
“You think you can just fuck me and play me while your girlfriend still calls?”
The reaction is instant.
The shift in the room is immediate.
Someone swears under their breath. One of the girls lets out a quiet oh, shit. Another shifts awkwardly, eyes darting between you and Paige like they just walked into a fucking war zone.
But you don’t look at any of them.
You only see her.
And Paige—
For the first time, she doesn’t have a comeback.
Her lips part slightly. Her throat bobs as she swallows. Her fingers twitch just slightly around the towel slung over her shoulder.
It’s subtle.
Barely there.
But you see it.
The hesitation.
The way she’s trying to catch up to you, trying to find the right move, trying to figure out how to pull back control.
But there isn’t one.
Because this time, you’re the one leading.
This time, she’s the one who doesn’t know what to say.
The silence stretches, thick and suffocating, pressing into your ribs, into your throat, into her.
Then—slowly—Paige exhales through her nose, shifts against the lockers, expression smoothing into something blank, something unreadable.
She tilts her head slightly, eyes flickering over your face, voice deceptively soft when she says—
“You done?”
Your stomach twists.
Not with pain. Not with embarrassment.
With rage.
Because she isn’t sorry.
She isn’t guilty.
She’s just pissed that you called her out in front of them.
Your grip tightens around the phone, your pulse hammering in your ears, and for a second, you think about throwing it at her.
Then, just as quickly, you step forward—lean in close, so only she can hear—
And whisper, voice like a knife—
“You’re a fucking coward.”
Paige’s jaw locks.
Her whole body tenses.
And that—
That’s how you know you landed a hit.
You hold her gaze a second longer, long enough to make sure she felt it, long enough to see the way her breath catches, the way her fingers twitch, the way she’s fighting to stay still.
Then—
Without waiting for a response—
You shove the phone against her chest.
She catches it automatically, fingers closing around it, but she doesn’t look down.
She just looks at you.
Expression unreadable.
Eyes sharp, dark, burning.
You should look away first.
You should be the one to turn and walk out.
But you don’t.
You hold her gaze.
Daring her.
Challenging her.
Waiting.
For what, you don’t fucking know.
But you can feel it.
Feel something shifting, feel something breaking, feel something coming.
And for the first time—
You think Paige might feel it, too.
But then—
She swallows.
Nods once.
Slips the phone into her pocket like it doesn’t matter.
Then—voice low, smooth, too fucking even—
She says, “See you around.”
Like this was nothing.
Like she didn’t just lose.
Like she’s already planning how to fucking win.
This is war.
#paige bueckers#wbb x reader#uconn wbb#uconn huskies#wbb imagine#wbb smut#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers uconn#uconn#paige buckets#wcbb x reader#wcbb smut#uconnwbb#paige bueckers fluff#uconn women’s basketball#paige x reader#bueckets
501 notes
·
View notes