#like this feeling of helplessnes and understanding

[nadia-cannot-think-straight]

BABE WAKE UP NEW CHŁOPI CLIP IS OUT ON YOUTUBE AND IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITE SCENES IN THE WHOLE MOVIE YAHOOO

[techramonic]

A Comprehensive Analysis on Eric Harris, 4.

Disclaimer: This analysis/psychoanalysis is limited only to analysis as a means to reflect and understand the people involved. It is strictly informative. Just like all of my posts, I am detached from the media I write about and solely focus on the people to understand their psychology, for others to gain insight. There is no room for me to romanticize or glorify anything I write because I am only here to explain. I understand and research, but I do not condone. Thank you.

Childhood 1.1: The Impacts of Frequent Relocation During Primary Years

In a span of 12 years, Eric had moved to over 8 schools due to his father’s occupation. Wayne Harris, his father, was a U.S. Air Force Pilot with a job that had a nature which led him to move from state to state until their family decided to settle in Littleton, Colorado during the year 1993. The emotional and social development of a child may be significantly impacted by frequent relocation; in Eric's case, there’s a clear portrait of how the situation paints itself into a larger manifestation of challenge in a child’s life. 

“What are the impacts and manifestations of constant environmental relocation on a child?”

As children grow, they start to observe and engage with their surroundings. A stable environment provides the necessities needed to develop the comfort they should have in themself  - if this environment fosters positive growth, that is. However, an abrupt change can have harmful effects on their well-being if not managed with adequate care. Though some children experience positive effects from relocation, there is the presence of stress that can affect the child’s situation and ways of coping.

1 : Sense of Control and Security

According to an article under the Institute for Family Studies, a child’s sense of control can be stunted by the pressure of repetitive transitions. Parents may also feel the obligation to be stricter in imposing control over their children as a sense of security (Sutherland, 2014). This can be observed in Eric’s answer regarding his court hearing after being convicted for attempting to steal a vehicle with Dylan, where he mentions that his curfew is, “6 on the weekdays, and 10 on the weekends.” Furthermore, his father had kept a 60-page spiral journal titled, “Eric” which contains documentation of Eric’s troubles and neighborly allegations regarding his behavior. Toward the end of it, he writes that he had to impose additional rules over his son, specifically regarding his sleep and study routines. With this, he had restricted his limit to his devices.

Furthermore, in an assignment submitted by Eric on September 21, 1998, titled "When it was Bad to be Good," he wrote about having to surrender all of his stockpiled weapons to his parents. He explained, "It was bad not because I might use the weapons, but because I paid good money or spent a lot of time making them. It made me feel that all that time and money was wasted. But since weapons are dangerous and my parents didn’t trust me, I suppose it was for the better." This demonstrates how Eric feels a lack of control over his actions, and sometimes even himself. As a result, he tries to exert control over other things to gain the satisfaction of the illusion that he has full control over everything he desires.

The yearning for control, when one is deprived specifically by primary figures, can be seen as a coping mechanism in response to unresolved conflicts and unmet needs during early developmental stages. When a child experiences overbearing or neglectful parenting, they may feel powerless and seek to regain a sense of control to compensate for this deprivation. This can manifest in adulthood as a compulsive need to dominate the environment and individuals in it. Seeking to exert authority or fixate on themself and their actions very carefully to neutralize the feelings of vulnerability and establish an image of stability in their life.

2 : Learned Helplessness

Learned helplessness is born out of the feeling of lack of control. According to psychology, it is the coping process where a person gradually loses the ability or motivation to avoid recurrent exposure to negative stimuli, or painful events. The individual feels hopeless since they have learnt from past experiences that they have no control over their circumstances, so they just accept. This phenomenon can impact one’s motivation, thought processes, and mental health, allowing them to feel as though their actions have no control over the consequences they encounter.

Learned helplessness illustrates that past experiences, especially negative ones, can influence one’s passive behavior in accepting negative situations, even if they can be fled from or if it is detrimental. In short, children can be conditioned to accept their situation because they find their feelings to be insignificant in changing it, even if they have the power to do so by changing their mindset. This crucial aspect can harshly affect one’s future decision-making.

 3 : Social Adjustment and Self-esteem

A change in environment may lead to the exhibition of a child’s anxiety, detachment, and loneliness. This can delay a child’s social skills, which are severely impacted by their ability to cope with the sudden change and their self-esteem. The impacts can be considered minuscule but have the chance to develop into larger-scale issues. During his time at Plattsburg around the years 1992 to 1993, 12-year-old Eric Harris was in 6th grade and playing in the school’s baseball team. According to his former teammates, he had issues communicating and was considered the “shyest” and most reserved in the team, opposite from his brother who was outgoing and a varsity player in the school’s baseball league. His former teammates draw their conclusions on his membership being a parental decision rather than his own, circling back to the lack of control. 

Due to the absence of stability in one’s surroundings, because it is unfamiliar to them, a child may feel ostracized with their surroundings because they have no lingering familiarity and connection with the place that they are in. The absence of connection and meaningful interaction with one's environment is significantly tied to one's self-esteem. When a child is unfamiliar with or disconnected from it, they lack a support system that provides validation and a sense of belonging. 

This means that they do not receive the positive reinforcement crucial to developing a healthy concept of identity. As a result, the child may struggle to find meaning or purpose in their surroundings and eventually themself as well, because of the feeling that they are underappreciated and insignificant, which impacts their self-esteem negatively and heightens their feelings of insecurity and inadequacy. Since their concept of self is connected to their environment and circumstances, they are a reflection or manifestation of its effects.

4  :  Attachment

As seen above, Eric had written a parting letter addressed to one of his friends in his school at Plattsburg 1993, Adam Patsy, because his family was forced to move away. Eric was recalled to be a friendly and sweet child during his time there, with no indications of violence and hatred present inside him. One of his former classmates even stated, “I think that… He’s just turn into something that he wouldn’t have turn into if he just stayed here.”  

There's a sense of hopelessness tied to one's feeling of being separated from those who they are attached to. In this case, it’s Eric’s friends. Letting go becomes especially challenging under these circumstances because of the fear of uncertainty and abandonment. For a child, this separation can stunt their social development, making it difficult to interact with peers. It feels like starting from scratch, as they must navigate the exhausting process of stepping outside their comfort zone to form new friendships again just to escape the wrath of isolation and the circumstances in their tragic situation.

This was also seen in one of the clips in "The Basement Tapes", where Eric abruptly cries after reflecting the "inevitable" situation of his death. He recounts his past memories and his old friends, wishing he should have re-visited Michigan and "old friends". This recall present his clear attachment to the people of his past that he held dear and the community or environment he was involved and connected to back then. Eric was in Oscoda, Michigan during grades 3 to 4, in the years 1989 to 1992.

[rheacheshire]

The following is what i wrote after an evening spent with my grandmother, when i wore a top without a bra, on a hot summer's day and she had to tell me about it, as, if she doesn't, no one else will. I had written a good deal more but i made the mistake of not saving the note before i got in the car and a small bump was all it took to lose it. I went through my notes app just now and stumbled across it and it made me tear up especially at the end and maybe it's because i'm heading to universtiy at 10am after working a night shift or maybe it's because my words still feel true. Either way i wanted to share it somewhere and at least here no one knows me as my first self:

.

June 524

I think the breking point, the rapid drop in the downward slope my feelings toward her had started to take, was when she didn't wash the eggs. She took them out, put them in a bowl and then cracked one, right inside that same bowl. My mom was there when she did it and we both stopped her, asked what she was doing and she looked confused, a bit aprehanded she didn't understand why we had stopped her. The woman I grew up learning to bake with, one who had strict rules and impeccable hygene everywhere and especially her kitchen, one who made me wash my hands, put my hairnet on my head and tied the apron on my back, one who taught me to never EVER use an unwashed egg even if it doesn't even touch the dish, one who denied me soft-boiled eggs in fear of salmonela. And she had just put them in the bowl and cracked one, right in there. And right now I can not help but feel dispair as I have lost all I had written and there's tears in my eyes. I hate loss and all this writing was so, so importnat and I want so badly to be okay with it and to not cling so hard to all that I can't control. I will save this before continuing to write and I will try to restore some parts. Most recent parts.

The initial helplessnes of not being able to recover what I had written has passed and I do not wish to try and recall more of it. I like too much how I worded each sentence to start second guessing how I had said one thing or another. I wish to keep adding to here whatever may come, as unloading what gathered in me from today's visit helped, even if it won't be enough to dispell my feelings about all of it. I'm afraid I'll always love her even if she can't accept me fully ever. Even if she learns to love every extra curve my body has, she has said herself if I ever told her I liked a girl she'd never speak to me again. I haven't had relationships ever up to this point and I don't feel a rush to, just a deep longing to be desired and touched but I know if I fall in love it won't be with a persons gender and that will remain unchanging. I'm crying at the moment but I'm outside and my mom will park the car soon and join me so we can go home. I do not wish for her to see my tears. She will worry and I'm not ready to talk. Barely able to write with honesty and my mom is too much of a vulnerability for me. Maybe one day I'll let her read this. For now I'll settle for changing my sheets, to feel some sense of accomplishment and progress. I wish I didn't have to brush my hair as it looks very good now but it wont in the morning as I will have slept on it and it will look slightly worse each day after. Nothing stays after all. Definitely not my words.

[plutoswrath]

✧ astro notes and titbits pt. 2 ✧

please do not copy my work.

other astro notes: 1, 2, 3

✧ people who have strong 8th house influence in their synastry possibly could have bonded over trauma or experienced similar hardships/traumas in life. Thus, these people usually find themselves having similar emotional patterns/emotional reactions and instincts. 

✧ a general tip for people with planets in retrograde: more than often, it will be fruitless to just go ahead and copy the standard, all that is considered ‘normal’ in your eyes, because it’s what most people do. Even though in other people’s behaviour might be partly truth to you, retrogrades force you to really look deep into yourself: how do you tick? What triggers you? What feels good for you and what doesn’t? How do you operate and what motivates you? Retrogrades push us to really figure ourselves out because they do create blocks and thus let a planets energy not flow freely. If you just try to ‘fit in’ with the rest without any second thought this could potentially backfire.  

✧ people with personal planets in Libra/Libra Ascendant find themselves pretty often in other peoples business (no matter if intentionally or unintentionally) but usually don’t like it when people unexpectedly do the same with them, especially if they aren’t close. With some Libra placements this can be due to their strong wish to keep a ‘pretty’ image around their life, they don’t like it when people see they are struggling. 

✧ Pluto in 3rd/Lilith in Gemini or 3rd/ Scorpio in 3rd house individuals could have experienced shared trauma with their siblings (!)/cousins, they might have walked similar paths at one point in life.

-> adding on to that: with Pluto/Lilith/Scorpio in 3rd or Lilith in Gemini it’s also likely that there was an open or secret power struggle with siblings. The siblings might have fought for attention from the parental figure or about who has the ‘upper hand’ amongst the other. Lies, secrets/secretive behaviour or pushing believe systems/opinions onto the other might have been common. 

✧ Lilith in the 3rd��individuals especially could have struggled with always being the second option or even ‘the other woman’. In their romantic connections there could have always been someone who they needed to ‘switch places’ with and thus their partner made them feel not only neglected but also unwanted and/or reusable.

✧ Saturn in Gemini/the 3rd could have struggled with always having to take responsibility for their younger family members/siblings -> they might have not been receiving a similar amount of encouragement/praise/warmth from parental/autorative figures in family/school.

✧ The relationship between the archetype of Saturn and Pluto can actually show a part of how we become adults: Pluto can show us where we become disempowered and helpless, while Saturns energy forces us to finally take responsibility about our feelings of helplessnes/hardships and thus we start realizing how to take care of us and how to take responsibility in the physical, material and emotional realm.

✧ General observation I’ve made over the years: people with profound Cancer/Moon, Pisces/Neptune, Taurus/Libra/Venus and Gemini/Mercury influence in their chart could have struggled with people perceiving them as the ‘manic pixie dream girl’ -> there’s potential to get an unhealthy emotional attachement to these individuals as they are usually very receptive of other peoples feelings and vibes 

-> This also goes for people who have Pisces/Neptune or Aquarius/Uranus in the 5th or these generational planets aspecting Venus/Ascendant or their 7th/12 house/lord of the 12th/7th house 

✧ sentences you might hear from someone with Saturn in the 8th (or  more so what they generally think and struggle with): “This is my, not your problem, so I don’t want your help” - “I need to be strong for the both of us, because I don’t trust you enough to let myself fall“ -  “I don’t like you seeing me weak” - “I like to spend money on you but please let’s not merge our financial ressources/I need to keep it seperate!” 

-> that’s because Saturns limitations and hardships fall into the house of shared ressources, these peoples problems with vulnerability and intimacy show in the way they handle shared emotions in a connection! 

✧ people who have Chiron in a Cancer/household degree (28) or Pisces degree might feel like they took on the traumas/struggles from their mother/family or might be extremly aware of generational traumas inside their family and have to confront them.

✧ a general question for people with Venus in the 11th: have you ever asked yourself ‘why can’t I find a partner that is exactly like my friends?’ -> making meaningful as well as progressive friendships may come easy to these people, but finding the same support and love they receive from friends is also a crucial attribute they need in a partner. They might want that exact same friendship connection in a partner that they have with their close friends, next to romantic feelings/interactions and thus might profit from really befriending a love interest first and taking their time with them. 

✧ People with strong Pisces/Neptune, Cancer/Moon and Virgo/Mercury influence need to learn to listen to their body as it is usually a constant reflection of their emotions/mind and thus would really benefit from practicing grounding techniques and body mindfulness 

✧ From personal experiences I noticed that people with personal planets in/strong influence of Scorpio/Pluto, Aquarius/Uranus, Cancer/Moon, Pisces/Neptune, Capricorn/Saturn and Gemini/Mercury usually really dislike it when people treat them like a puzzle that needs to be ‘figured out’. They usually just want someone who listens and understands them. People with strong influence of those energies most of the time know about their complex emotional nature and sense of self, they like people who show effort in getting to know them, but dislike people who try to label them too much/think they know them better than they do. 

[piercedpressure]

how has deja evolved over the years? i swear she gets redesigned like every few months /pos lol

LMAOOO ud be right cause shes changed stories each year (im painfully indecisive), this year is the only story ive genuinely been interested in exploring since i finally landed on a genre i think would fit her best? and i consider her redesigns to be a sort of progression into how ive grown as a writer and maybe as a person since shes been with me for so long lmao

ill place this under read more cause ill go into condensed detail about her evolution for her characterization, her design, and a small timeline for her story contexts but tl;dr shes grown so much and has gotten way more complex. i love her so much

2017-early 2018: she actually started out as a sona concept! design wise, nothing really special tbh, i was throwing stuff i really liked. for 2017, she was just a throwaway concept, but i was rapidly improving towards the end of that year...

mid-2018: ... that i ended up reusing her concept as a character concept, and during that year, i made an au with a friend that spiraled into something that lasted about the next 2 years, that then included her as one of the main characters LMAO. i wanted to draw crazy hair and also a cute mask, so i did. i ended up making it so that the masks were to both hide her identity (shes a fugitive in the au) and to be some sort of metaphor. her personality was very outwardly sweet, but she could also kill you so it best to not get on her bad side, but she was also in a constant learned helplessnes. big deja year

2019: design wise, i removed the mask, made her fatter (despite me not knowing how to draw fat people yet), and made her sorta baby-faced, since her character is a lot more childish during this bit? story wise, her story was included in an anthology about different kinds of love in a post-apocalyptic fantasy world. during this time, i was going through a Lot mentally, and it sorta marked the beginning of a really horrible period in my life thats still kind of ongoing, so i used her story in a more experimental sense so i can figure out different workarounds in an escapist way? this is also when i started pairing her with her now-partner-in-stories, lualhati, and from this point, lulu and deja are inseparable

2020: for this year, i was sorta putting her story off? i was really struggling to figure out what to do with it other than the deja/lulu love story, but at the same time, that marked me going through a journey of adding fat people to my work. dejas always been small fat, but her body hasnt actually been drawn well enough. we all start from somewhere though. she was a lot more calm in this version, and is sort of a leader figure for a village in a fantasy world. but i wasnt really feeling it.........

2021: last year was when i really started digging deep into what i wanted to do. i wanted weird gay trans cathartic art. so dejas story was that. still wasnt really feeling it, but u can tell i was really experimenting trying to land on something i was passionate about. while i did like her design since its a turning point in my art, and its visually loud (the color palette, holy shit), IT WAS SO HARD TO DRAW? i understand that 2021 me was really going at it with very loud and distinct designs, but the reason why i didnt even draw her for months after was because she was so fucking hard to draw. and i didnt put enough effort to portraying her fatness (which will soon become a very important aspect of her character). but were about to pull a gamer move

2022: up until now, since 2018-2019, i wasnt really satisfied with her story. it didnt really fit what i wanted, bc i was mostly concerned with how other people would react if i talked about them, especially since deja/lulu have always been very personal to me. but i had a vision. where deja and lulu are in a revenge drama thriller in a city in the middle of nowhere. and i havent stopped thinking about it day and night ever fucking since. i brought back a lot of elements from past designs (mostly cause i thought theyd look great, i was right), and im finally getting to a point where im figuring out how i draw fat people. now, dejas characterization came really easy to me (hypervigilent, short-tempered, mysterious, a second away from realizing shes trans). her story explores themes surrounding violence, secrets, and suffocating marriages, and while its a far heavier story than the past ones, its the first time ive been genuinely excited to see how its grown. i could ramble about this all day lol

deja is a growing character and she keeps getting better and better every time im exploring her, and she genuinely means the world to me. thank u for reading this if u have decided to read this

[justasimplesinner]

After Arkham knight events, SO is reunite with killer croc, blame themself for not be able to find him earlier and appologies. SO look out for him for months, made plans to help him escape. When SO knew that Warden experiment and tortur their beloved, they beat up the shit out of the asshole. SO then escape with Waylon and later give him a lot of comfort, rassure him, they will help him to get better.

im not sure i understand this correctly, so i may have changed/mixed it up a little bit, so sorry for that! i just tried to make sure my writing makes sense

Arkham Knight!Killer Croc being reunited with his s/o hcs:

what the Warden did to him really took a toll on him. Waylon was never proud of his looks and of who he was, he turned into the monster people made him out to be and he honestly hated every second of it. and now it got even worse. he would've never thought he'd miss how he looked earlier, but he thinks he is just fucking disgusting now. his body is modified and mutated and he can't un-do it, no matter how much he tries to tell himself he can. he looks like a fucking abomination

for some time when he was locked in that fucking cage and experimented on, he thought whether you waited for him. or maybe if you thought it was... a good riddance. he knows you have no way to fucking break into a flying penitentary, it's quite literally impossible for a simple civillain like you, yet he feels so fucking lonely without you and his emotions are raging. the experiments were also fucking with his hormones and the chemical reactions in his brain, everything was hurting 10x times worse and it was a very traumatising experience. and all that stress and trauma has also fucked with the Warden's experiments, which made him into... whatever he's become

for a moment, when he took control of the penitentary, all he could think of was getting back to you but he knew that not only were you out of Gotham because of Scarecrow's plan, but he was also... scared to see you. it was a miracle you wanted him then, and he didn't know if he could take a rejection from you

but every second spent in the penitentary and then later at the GCPD was filled with thoughts of you. he just wanted to fucking go back to you and slither into your arms, he wanted you to just tell him everything's alright and that it's gonna be okay. he never admitted it, but he really needed the comfort you always brought him but now... he couldn't have it. he was happy you were out of Gotham when Scarecrow released his fear toxin upon the city though. he was happy you were safe. or at least hoped you were

but then suddenly, a few days of the city gathering it's shit and trying to get back on it's feet, he got news that someone paid to bail him out. and he was forced to face you after all that excruciating time away from you even though he was not ready to hear your disgusted voice rejecting him because of what he's become

but despite everything, he was only met with you acceptance. with your warm embrace, your concern, your hands slowly caressing his deformed body, your tears because of your own helplessnes, because you couldn't help him then and let him get hurt. it was an absolute whiplash, but that doesn't mean he didn't curl around you and cling to you like you were his lifeline

you let him stay in your house after that, saying that you had to have him there to protect him from anything that could harm him. it amused him, you were acting like an angry little chiuaua trying to protect a huge rottweiler. but he couldn't deny that he was so fucking relieved that you didn't hate him now, and even let him stay with you in your home. it was... he couldn't quite explain the feelings it woke up in him, but he knew he'd never let you go after that

you were there to help him in planning his revenge on the Warden. he may have not come to terms with what happened with him (even though you were helping a lot with that), but he understood that the effects were irreversible and that only fueled his hatred for the man and he was not going to stop until he tasted his blood

[riidcr-archive]

@illtakeyourthrone​ asked:  [ 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 ] My muse gently touches a bruise on your muse’s body   

            That wicked smile taunted him,    and just as if he was facing a snake each word dripped with a deadly poison.    Never in a million years did he see himself coming across that vile man again.    Working with him in the past was a   mistake   and he left that partnership as soon as he had the chance,    Eugene had many enemies and that man was on   top   of the list. 

           The hate was mutual between the two and in their anger it became unclear who attacked the other first,    oddly enough it wasn’t Eugene that started the fight,    given his short temper at times—    he only came in to check in when he was told they had caught a dangerous criminal,    who despite being   chained   was able to squirm out of the guards' hold in order to throw a punch at the captain.    Eugene staggered backwards as he evaded the first blow and before he could regain his balance he was pulled by the collar and shoved to the wall,    a yelp escaped him as his back hits the brick with great force.    The chain that was used to bind the hands that gripped his collar were now around his neck,    the man could kill him in any moment but something held him back    ❝ So you're on their side now,    eh Captain  ? ❞    the man scoffed with his   venomous   tone    ❝ Tell me what did you do ?    are they that stupid to believe you or do you really think you can be good,    start fresh.    I thought you were smarter than that,    people like us don't get to have second chances,    not after everything we've done.    You can pretend all you like but i know you...     Flynn Rider,    you're not a rightouse man,    you're just lucky.    In truth,    you're just as terrible as I am. ❞    he snickered and Eugene felt as if he was   boiling   at those words.

         ❝ I’m not like you. ❞    Eugene retorted with a growl and kneed him in the stomach,    quick enough to move and not allowing the man to fall back as he pulled him back on his feet in order to not miss his face as he he punched him with all his might,    at that he lets him fall,    thinking it would be enough to   shut him up   but there was that taunting smile again,    getting on his nerves    ❝ Son of a— ❞    he almost snapped as he found himself itching to punch that twisted smile off his face,    but before he could do anything more guards came and held him back from doing anything,    fully aware of what the other was trying to do    ❝ Forget it,    Captain.    He's not worth it. ❞    they said,    urging him to leave the issue to them and call it a day.   

            He wasn’t exactly calm when they let him go but he agreed,    finding himself unable to stay here a minute longer.    He can’t recall how he made it back to the palace,    he was too   furious   and lost within his own thoughts that forget to pay attention to his surroundings,    when he got there he headed straight to his room,    slamming the door behind as he entered.    He only bothered to take his uniform's jacket off then spent the rest of the time pacing about in the room.   Soon his anger fades into a certain kind of   melancholy   as he settled down on the edge of his bed,    sitting there for almost an hour just thinking.   

            A knock on the door is heard and he chooses to ignore it...    even if he knew who was on the other side.    He couldn't face her right now,    not like this.    But he was a fool to think his poor attempt would hold her back.    The door clicked after the second knock and there she was walking in without a premission,    she must have heard of what happened judging by the worried look she gave him,    she didn’t ask him to explain himself but instead asked if he is   hurt    ❝ I’m fine,    Rapunzel.    Really. ❞    he answered quitely,    barely putting much effort into the   lie    ❝ Let me see. ❞    the princess spoke again and he felt a pit in his stomach when he realised what she was aiming at,    she didn’t look at the bruises on his knuckles...    he knew what she wanted to see,    which meant she was there when it had happened and that made him feel awful.   

            He hesitated for a good few minutes then reached to unbottoun his shirt just enough for her to see the beginning of a big bruise on his side,    he took quite the hit and it was a   miracle   he didn’t end up with a broken rib.    Unlike what Rapunzel thought he didn’t wince or flinch away from her touch,    she tried her best to be careful as she made sure he was as fine as he claimed to be,    the only thing that   stung   was the sympathy in her tone that Eugene felt that he didn’t deserve.    It brought back the man's words that dwelled in his mind for the last couple of hours,    he was right and Eugene only snapped because   he knew   he was right,    he didn’t deserve this life or the woman that gave it all to him,    the only fate he was worthy of was the execution he was promised with numerous times.    ' You're just as terrible as I am '    his heart felt heavy as the words haunted him again. 

            It was not a kind of physical pain that made him so unresponsive,    Rapunzel seemed to understand that with how   distant   he seemed,    she may have said something and he couldn't quite hear her at first,    not until she cupped his cheeks with her hands and made him look at her,    his brown hues tore themselves away from emraled greens,    too   ashamed   with himself to look back,    still silent despite her attempts of getting him to speak,     he only did when the   guilt   in him was too much to bare.     

         ❝ Maybe he's right...   Maybe i can’t change.    I know i can’t put the past behind and pretend like it didn’t happen,    there's nothing i can do that will erase all the bad things i’ve done. ❞    he finally spoke,    his voice shaking slightly with the emotions he tried so hard to bury    ❝ You keep telling me to be proud of myself but there's nothing to be proud of,    im not a good person,    not with everything i’ve done. ❞    those were thoughts he didn’t share fully with her,    mostly because he didn’t wish to   burden   her with them,    what occurred today had clearly hit a nerve and he was unable to keep everything for himself this time.    ❝ what if he's right... ❞    he wondered again with helplessnes evident in his tone.      ❝ Then I'd still love you. ❞    he heard her say    ❝ Thief or Captain i love you the way you are Eugene Fitzherbert. ❞  

            Although the words were meant to comfort him he only felt   worse,    because when he finally looked back at her he saw the sincerity in her eyes,    she meant every word and that weighed heavily on his heart,    perhaps because he didn’t think so highly of himself...    She deserved better,    but she loved and chose him no matter what,    which made it difficult at times because he knew that the more she loved him the more he   feared   of   losing   her love.    He loved her   with all his heart,    and while he felt   blessed   to have her in his life and to know that she loved him back he didn’t quite understand   why   she did,    how could she love someone so   broken ?

            No reply is given in response to her reassurance and instead of saying anything he merely frowns and drags a bruised hand to wipe away a stray tear the rolled down his cheek,    he kept his hand over his eyes as more tears kept coming.    It seemed like a struggle to keep his composer but he only broke down completely when Rapunzel pulled him close into an embrace,    too weak to hold himself back as he sobbed quitely onto her hold.

[harrisdaugherty-blog]

How To Make Funds Arbing And Keep Away From Having Your Accounts Closed

The act of obtaining an asset and quickly promoting the same asset for a larger price tag. For example, 1 may possibly execute two orders at after, 1 to invest in a security at $ten and a single to sell the exact same safety at $12. Arbitrage funds are often promoted by fund houses as 'risk-free' investments. The profit in arbitrage strategy is the difference between the prices of the instrument in different markets (like cash and derivative markets for instance). The truth however is that arbitrage funds are not risk-free. Strengthen Utilization Ratio By Asking For Credit Limit Increases This is normally your initially consideration because this determines no matter whether the arb is worth and is also your initially hint at whether or not there might be an error in the arbing opportunity. 2% – 7% return appears optimized variety and you could have to have to verify if it is a palp if larger than ten%, you may disregard under .5% and will dismiss over 20% promptly, just a guideline. Now that you have these two percentages you can find out your prospective profits on any form of trade. For this, we need to have to know how substantially of our outlay (%) has to be bet on each and every side of the trade. Get the most up-to-date facts on Live Odds, Predictions, and Betting Trends from the sports gambling capital of the glob r>"Risk-free bet" This phrase generally refers to an offer where a new registrant makes a bet with the sportsbook for the first time, and if the bet loses, the player will be credited with a bonus bet corresponding to the amount of that first wage r>Problem gambling is harmful to psychological and physical health. People who live with this addiction may experience depression, migraine, distress, intestinal disorders, and other anxiety-related problems. As with other addictions, the consequences of gambling can lead to feelings of despondency and helplessnes r>If a bettor gets stiffed by an unlicensed betting internet site, then he or she has no recourse. Canada lotteries supply 메이저사이트 parlay cards on a variety of sports, such as football, basketball, baseball and h r> The ones that do will charge you a lot more since they see you as risky. Chapter 7 bankruptcy is only readily available to those who pass a "means test" and can’t be reasonably expected to make payments to their creditors. Instead , your non-exempt assets are sold and the dollars paid to your creditors. Anything your creditor create off is regarded as earnings to you by the IRS. If you are in the 25 % bracket, you will owe $250 for each and every $1,000 yo br> If you take no action to boost your credit score, it may well take a good quantity of time ahead of your credit score improves — that is if it ever does. Decrease credit scores lead to unfavorable interest rates, high fees and difficulty acquiring approval for credit. Get your credit report and FICO score for just $1 with enrollment in Experian CreditWorks credit mo . Taking into consideration you may perhaps have to travel to many sportsbooks if your bets are not being created on-line, lots of arbers will basically employ men and women to go make their wagers for them in many locations . Bookies are generally updating their odds, generally utilizing other bookmakers as a benchmark. Arbitrage betting entails a hell of a lot of organisation, time and effort 메이저사이트. It is vital for to have an understanding of how and why arbitrage opportun ppen. Even accounts that aren't normally listed on your credit report can be sent to a collection agency and added to your credit. Turn out to be familiar with the data contained in each of your credit reports. They'll all look very equivalent, even if you have ordered them from distinc eaus. There are a couple of points you need to contemplate before you go directly to a credit repair service. Seeking specialist assist could be a worthwhile investment for your credit score, but it is not needed if you can do the investigation and commit to placing in tion. While the NFL and the NBA are the most common sports leagues to bet on, the typical American also enjoys betting on college sports and leagues, such as the NCAAF or the NCAAB. NHL is also quite common amongst sports betting aficionados, who generally love a excellent hockey match. One particular apparent spot to appear for parallel insights into the legalization of sports gambling is the current 메이저사이트 legalization or decriminalization of marijuana in numerous states. Some men and women argue that as marijuana is created a lot more widely legal, that a firm like Pfizer will move in and dominate the medicinal industry, whilst a firm like Anheuser-Busch could possibly dominate the recreati ketplace. Arbitrage increases deadweight loss for the reason that firms that have marketplace energy make much less (14 GWh vs. 14.9 GWh). Even even though economic traders are not allowed to participate in the Iberian electrical energy marketplace, some sellers and buyers could possibly arbitrage. In our paper, we show that wind farms are especially active arbitrageurs in this marketplace they generally sell substantially much more wind than forecasted in the day-ahead market, shopping for it back in the intra-day industry.