#like theyre like ‘you need to fuel your body well make sure you dont look tired. you have to stay the exact same weight the whole year so

[newdayslinguine]

The longer this dallas cowboys cheerleaders docuseries goes on the worse it gets

[that-girl-lyra]

A (long) Rant About Fitness & Personal Health

So if you're new to my blog, hi, Im Lyra and I am a 27 y/o who is very passionate about fitness and physical health. A few years back I was 165lbs and very unhappy, so I decided to start working out and then boom, currently 116lbs and 18% body fat. (Im 5ft2)

I didnt do that through some wacko diet, restricting my food, keto, whatever. No. Simply put, I ate food, and lifted heavy shit over, and over and over. And whoda thunk?! I lost body fat, gained muscle, as well as mental clarity, improved my sleep health, and physical health as a whole. And another fun fact, I still ate "bad food". Oooo, scary. Pizza, beer, burgers, cake, cookies, if its food, I want to eat it, and I did (and do).

It irks me on a cellular level that some people try to convince others that the only and or best way to lose weight, is to follow some weird ass diet that likely has more health risks than benefits, and the people theyre trying to convince, are already pretty vulnerable and are ready to try pretty much anything to get results and FAST!

Whilst I more than understand wanting results asap, fitness and physical health is not something you will see results and progress with in a short span of time. Sure, you might start feeling a little better after a month of implementing a fitness routine, but you'll look the same, and more or less still be the same. Fitness above all else teaches patience, and discipline. The muscles, slimmer figure, or whatever your original goal was is just a bonus.

Let me break a few things down for you;

Food is fuel, so fuckin EAT

You dont need to be keto, or follow the carnivore diet, vegetarian, vegan, nada. Nothing. Zilch. Zero, to be able to lose weight and gain muscle effectively, efficiently, safely, and be able to maintain a healthy body.

The best thing that I have ever heard regarding food (and it helped change my own relationship with food) is a quote from personal trainer and fitness coach Alex Tima from Hybrid Wellness. Alex said "There is no such thing as bad/unhealthy food. There is only more nutritious food, and less nutritious food".

Too much of anything isnt good, and too little of anything is also not good. Thats why we call it a "balanced" diet.

A lot of fitness influencers and whoever now days are trying to convince their followers to follow a strict diet of only animal products and maybe some fruit, all while eating one meal a day because "thats what our ancestors did!". Yeah, and our ancestors died at the ripe old age of 30.

True, we are/were hunter gatherers, but evolution is a thing as well. Just because back then we could survive off of only one meal a day, doesnt mean we have too now. More so, the biggest and strongest of our ancestors, still ate more/the most!

Bottom line, eat food when youre hungry. Eat good food. Meats, fruits, veggies, grains, fats, etc.

Dont let anyone tell you that youre undisciplined because you dont subscribe to any particular diet.

2. If You Wanna Look "Toned", You've Gotta Put in the Work

After becoming more fit and healthy myself, I have had quite a few people approach me and ask how they can do the same. However, nine times out of ten, they all say the same thing, or at least some variation of "I just wanna look more toned".

Well guess what? You will not look more toned, if there is nothing to tone.

Cardio alone will not help you achieve your goals. Sure, walking is fantastic and jogging is a great way to increase cardiovascular health and stamina, but it will not make you look more "toned". For that, you will need to build muscle. And how do we build muscle?

WE LIFT HEAVY SHIT WE EAT LOTS OF PROTEIN AND THEN WE LIFT HEAVIER SHIT

Unless you are literally training like Sam Sulek, you will not look like Sam Sulek. Lifting weights will NOT make you look "big" or "bulky" if you're not trying to become big or bulky. Just lift a good amount to where its a bit of a struggle, and increase the weight gradually overtime as you become stronger.

That with a little bit of cardio works wonders. Not just cardio or weights by themselves.

Again...balance

3. FUCK THE SCALE

Sooooo many people are obsessed with the scale, being skinny, having the smallest BMI they could possibly get but let me tell you something.

My own mother has been obsessed with not only her weight (shes an almond mom with the exception of booze), but mine for as long as I can remember. Shes done so many diets, taken god knows what concoctions of...whatever, pills, etc all for the sake of being skiiinniiiiiiiii!!!!!

Guess where she is now? I mean sure, shes super fuckin skinny, but shes got diareah 24/7, liver damage, blood problems, thyroid issues, she had fuckin scurvey, and various brain issues and pretty much, delusions. But so long as her weight is low along with her waistline, she does not give a fuuuuuckk.

Guys, its not worth it. Do NOT stress over the numbers you see on the scale or any BMI calculator. Its okay if you want to drop a few pounds, but I highly HIGHLY encourage you to just simply take progress pics instead. Your eyes may lie to you, but the camera will not.

I could go on and on and on about this topic, but this is already a long enough post, and I don't want to info overload you lol.

To wrap up, fitness and personal health is all about balance. Nothing more, nothing less. Balanced diet, balanced sleep, balanced workout plan, etc.

If you have any questions whatsoever, please feel more than free to drop into my asks! Ill be more than happy to answer them when I can :)

[red-riot-rat]

ＲＥＱＵＥＳＴ: me dashing to the request button 🏃🏽‍♂️. I am asking for platonic league of villains with teen reader who's joining the team and everyone like- "tHeY dOnT lOoK lIkE mUcH-" but then when they go on their first missions reader whips out some marvel black widow assassin type shit and they're like: 🧿👄🧿 

HEY HEY! GOD I FUCKING LOVE P!LOV REQUESTS GJNKFG

Ｇｅｎｒｅ：CHAOS AHHSAHASH

𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: kinda gore(brief mention of blood), reader being a badass, shigaraki is crusty and unmoisturized…. Uhm, reader kills like two dudes, stabbing, me making up stuff for fighting no one @ me on that, 

𝘗𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘴: they/them

AN: is this good,,, no. a lfjhABSLKJGN

-

-

OKAY SO MR. COMPRESS BRINGS YOU IN

AND YOURE LIKE OKAY bitch.

But not really

Hes very nice to you and recognizes that even though you're young you can be good for the league, not to mention that you’ll soon all basically be family

But full ass you walk into the bar and everyone just stares because

You're a new recruit

 YOU'RE A KID

Shigaraki: Theyre a fucking kid

Mr. Compress: Uh, yeah.

N e way

All of them sit at the counter and just stare at you.

They want you to break and start talking but you're used to this

You’ve been doing this gig for most of your life

Eventually tomura will start to throw a tantrum, kinda, but then he’ll ask you questions 

He wants to scare you, he wants to be intimidating but to you,

You kinda look up to him

You answer his questions, sounding oblivious to the obvious threats he spews to you.

“Kid, you're going to end up dead NPC here, and I'll make sure of it. You still wanna join?”

“✨ yes you dumbass✨”

NO PLEASE DON'T SAY THAT

Nah for real you just say yeah.

He doesn't dislike you, but he's purposely not going to like you because he wants you to be scared of him. 

Kurogiri talks to him, they glance over at you every once and awhile 

You’ve been talking with Toga, Dabi and Mr. Compress

“So! Who are ya?”

You reluctantly explain what has happened and who you are, you know the backstory. Parents were heroes and pushed you too hard to become a hero as well,

And then you went apeshit,

The hero commissions been on your ass since you’ve been born,

You didn't want to ever be like your parents

So yay villain times

Dabi talked a little about it, agreeing with you that parents are shit, you know and then you asked him

“Who were your parents?” 

But tomura interrupted your conversation you might never know

“Much to my unwant of a side character like you, welcome kid.”

Toga pats your head

Dabi slaps you on the back

Twice messes up your hair

And Mr compress just flashes you a thumbs up

You stick with them

You grow as close as you can with Dabi, and especially close with Twice and Toga.

Although Dabi seems cold to you, he’ll never tell you but he does care a great deal for you.

Shigaraki assigns a mission to you, Dabi, and Toga 

All you have to do is get some info out of a boss that works for a small part of the hero commission

Which only fuels your anger

-

-

-

You walked side by side, to the right side of Dabi. Toga skipped on his other side, and waved her knife around. Yours was hidden underneath your hoodie, and was sheathed in a thigh rig.

“What's his name again again Dabi?” Toga sang, not caring that her voice echoed down the long hall. You glanced at the male, who looked rather annoyed.

“I don't know, it doesn't matter. We just get the info and get out.” He turned and stared at her,

“That's ALL we need.” 

She groaned and pouted to him, “You’re no fun! No fun at all.” 

Dabi grunted in response, he honestly didn’t care. 

“Hey! Who are you?” A male voice behind you caused all three of you to spin. Out of reflex you kicked the side of his knee and he toppled over. You smiled wide as you heard Dabi warn you, but you didn't care. You played your own game, you were the narrator of your own story. You didn't need anyone in your way.

You grabbed the top of his head, grasping onto his hair violently. You yanked the knife out of its holster, and twirled it between your fingers.

“Guess my hand…” 

You held it to the man's throat, and beamed at him.

“Slipped.” 

And in one quick motion, the man's body went limp as he bled onto the floor. You stood tall, and your expression blank like you didn't just kill a man.

You looked up, your eyes narrowed. You scanned through the eyes staring at you as you twirl your knife between your fingers again.

“Kid we-”

“We had a problem and I took care of it, let's move on.” your knife flips through your fingers at a fast pace, one that if you slipped it would hurt like hell.

“That was fun! Can I get his blood? Can I? Can I?” Toga asked excitedly, turning her head rapidly to Tomura then to you.

“Have at it.” You spun your knife one last time, and handed it to her. She seemed taken back, like she didn't expect you to comply.

“Yay!” she took the knife eagerly, and you turned away from her before anything went down. As you turned you were faced with a pair of turquoise eyes staring daggers at you.

“Kid, that was fucking dangerous. We could’ve handled that.” Dabi was frustrated, but he didnt know why. Yeah, he could have handled that but seeing you put yourself in danger like that made him upset.

“Yeah I know that okay? That's what its fucking about. That dude works with the hero commission, I’m not letting him stand.” Your brows furrowed as you talked and Dabi rolled his eyes. 

“Don't treat me like I’m five. I know I don't look like it, but I’ve done this for a long time.” you shoved your hands into the pocket of your hoodie and kept walking.

“You’re either a pawn, or a player.”

Toga smiled wide and skipped up to you.

“That was cool! Dabi’s just a party pooper!” She glanced over her shoulder and stuck her tongue out at the male.

He rolled his eyes once again, and continued to walk behind your duo.

Eventually, after minutes of silence you found the main office, that held the boss. 

Well, a mini boss.

-

A funnel of smoke fogged the hallway as you ran.

“Kid! Wait up!” Dabi’s raspy voice rang through the long hall and you spun on your heels to face him.

He walked towards you, Toga smiling wide at his side, blood smeared across her face. The sound of footsteps came from both sides of you, and you glanced over your shoulder to the other side of the hall.

A man's figure ran closer to you by the second, he moved fast, too fast for you to see his face.

Too fast you didn't have time to react when he punched you straight in the face. You fell back, holding a hand to your nose that began to bleed. 

“KID!” Dabi’s flames erupted from his hands and Toga’s knife made its way back into her hand.

Your brows furrowed and you jumped up as you unsheathed your knife. The figure in front of you threw another punch, but you ducked causing him to stagger forwards. You slammed him into the wall and flipped your knife in your hand. 

You drew your arm back, and brought it into his chest quickly stabbing him right between the ribs. He yelped in pain and held his hands against your shoulders.

Blood stained his blue button up shirt and it leaked onto the floor. 

“Guess nothing lasts forever huh?” Your boot rested on his leg, and you pushed back removing your knife from his abdomen. 

Immediately, an arm wrapped around your neck locking you into place. 

Dabi began to run to you, the blue flame escaping his hands once again , and Toga flipped her knife in her hands as she stalked over to you.

You struggled, gasping for air against the figure, and with your best ability elbowed him in his chest. He groaned but kept you in place, until you swept his right foot and pushed him into the opposite wall. 

“Everyone here is fucking annoying.” You took a step back and glanced at the figure struggling, leaning against the wall. You pushed a hand out and stopped Dabi and Toga from coming closer, and smiled wide at them with your eyes narrow.

“Did you know you're lifes a game?” You asked the man, his eyes wide, his breathing heavy and staggered. 

You threw the knife into the air and as it spun the male watched it. You caught it in your right hand, and wasted no time to throw it at the figure. 

It lodged right into absodemn and he toppled over.

“Can we go home? This is kinda boring.” You groaned at Dabi, who stared at you with wide eyes. Toga begged for the knife while jumping up and down and you compiled once again.

“You’re a fucking madman.”

[abrakophile]

I was looking through a bunch of junk and found some letters from my dad when he was in the army. I’m afraid I'll accidently toss them, so maybe I’ll put them here?

OPs Name JUNE 02 03

I LOVE YOU

THIS IS MY NAME IN KURDISH

*my dad wrote his first and last name, and under it, in Kurdish*

ILL TRY AND FIND OUT HOW TO WRITE YOUR NAME AND MOMS TOO.

ITS STILL HOT. I WORK AND READ BOOKS TO PASS THE TIME AWAY.

HOW ARE YOU DOING? GOOD I HOPE. WHAT DO YOU DO FOR FUN? DO YOU EVER HANG OUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS? TELL THEM I SAID “WASSUP?” NAH, DONT TELL THEM. TELL ME WHAT YOUR THINKING. I’M TRYING TO SEND YOU SOME MORE OF MY DRAWINGS. WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DRAW YOU? DID YOU LIKE THE DRAWING I SENT YOU OF YOU NAME? ITS ALRIGHT IF YOU DIDNY. JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU DO WANT ME TO DRAW YOU.

(Flip Page)

THIS IS WEIRD! (The page does not have lines on the left side of it) i WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS PIECE OF PAPER. HaHa

I MISS YOU ALOT. PLEASE SOND ME SOME MORE OF YOUR DRAWINGS, YOU CAN DRAW ME ANYTHING YOU WANT TO.

ARE YOU BEING GOOD FOR YOUR MOM? ITS NICE IF YOU HELP HER OUT WHILE I’M AWAY.

HAVE YOU BEEN ANYPLACE NEW? HOW IS SCHOOL GOING FOR YOU? IS MOMMY GOING TO SCHOOL? I KNOW I WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL WHEN I GET BACK. HOPEFULLY I GET THE CHANCE TO LEARN EVERYTHING THAT THERE IS TO KNOW. THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

ALSO, ID LIKE TO DO SOME FISHING? HOW ABOUT YOU? I GUESS ILL END HERE. BE GOOD AND STAY IN SCHOOL. AND JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS.

THEYRE BAD.

I LIVE YOU OP

*hearts and x’s* DADDY

---

(I don’t know if all these pages are in order or if it’s missing any, but this was the letter in the same stack as the last but this one was for my mom. In some places his indents indicate passage of time.)

I HAVENT HAD ANY TIME TO WRITE SINCE WEVE BEEN ON THE ROAD, NOT TO MENTION THAT WE CAN’T SEND MAIL WHEN WE’RE MOVING ALL THE TIME.

WEVE BEEN ON THE ROAD FOR ABOUT FIVE OR SIX DAYS, I HAVENT REALLY BEEN COUNTING. I KNOW I TOLD YOU THAT WE’D BE IN KUWAIT FOR A WHILE, BUT THAT WAS SO YOU WOULDNT BE WORRIED. I’M GOING TO KEEP THIS LETTER THOUGH, TILL I GET HOME.

ABOUT TWO NIGHTS AGO, WE DROVE THROUGH BAGDHAD, SOMEBODY SAID THAT THERE WERE PILED BODIES, I DONT KNOW IF IT WAS TRUE.

AND I GUESS YESTERDAY, A COUPLE OF PEOPLE SAID THEY SAW A MISSILE OR SOEMTHING SHOT AT US. I WAS TRYING TO FIX A TRUCK SO I DIDNT SEE IT.

ITS NOT AS DUSTY HERE IN IRAQ. IT REMINDS ME OF THE CONVOYS IN KOREA.

MOST OF THE PEOPLE WILL WAVE “HI”. SOME OTHERS DONT.

I SAW A KID OPEN HIS HAND ONCE WHILE MOVING, AND IT SAID “BUSH” THAT WAS KIND OF COOL.

OH YEAH. HERES A STORY. WHILE OUT DOING A MISSION, ONE OF OUR “BRADLEY” TANKS FIRED ON AN ENEMY AMMO TRUCK AND CLIPPED A KID. THE ROUNDS BLEW ONE OF HIS LEGS OFF AND SOME OF THE OTHER, FROM THE KNEE DOWN. SO THE MEDICS PICKED HIM UP AND BROUGHT HIM TO OUR RECONCOLIDATING POINT FOR MEDICAL TREATMENT. I GUESS HE EVENTUALLY DIED FROM LOSS OF BLOOD THE NEXT NIGHT AND YESTERDAY THEY TOOK HIM OUT AND BURIED HIM.

ALSO WE PICKED UP ABOUT 25-30 P.O.W.s AND SENT THEM SOUTH.

IT GETS PRETTY COLD AT NIGHT. AND THE DAY’S ARE VERY HOT.

SINCE WE LEFT KUWAIT ITS BEEN ME AND MENDOZA IN THE FIVE TON WRECKER AND I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT ITS BEEN EXCITING. WE KEPT GETTING SEPERATED FROM THE CONVOY AND BREAKING DOWN. BUT I THINK THAT WERE BETTER NOW. HOPEFULLY.

IM STILL WAITING TO BE AMBUSHED TO MAKE ALL THIS SEEM REAL TO ME. A PART OF ME WANTS IT AND ANOTHER DOESNT.

AND IT SEEMS LIKE ONLY OUR UNIT HAS TO STAY IN UNIFORM, EVERYONE ELSE WEARS T-SHIRTS AND BANDENA’S AND RAGS ON THEIR HEAD

WERE STILL GOING NORTH. NOBODY KNOWS HOW LONG WE’LL STAY. ITS NOT THAT BAD HERE. MEANING, IT COULD BE WORSE. 

I USED A “SHIT-CHAIR”. ITS JUST A METAL CHAIR WITH A HOLE CUT IN THE MIDDLE AND THE SEAT FROM A TOILET BOLTED TO IT, GROSS.

HELICOPTERS CAN BE HEARD ALL DAY AND NIGHT. I GOT TO SEE THEM DROP BOMBS ALL DAY ABOUT 3 DAYS AGO, FROM A DISTANCE OF COURSE.

ILL BE DRIVING AGAIN, IN A MINUTE. PROBABLY RE-FUEL AND BACK ON THE ROAD AGAIN. IM ENJOYING IT.

I HAVE 8 MAGAZINES FULL OF ROUNDS. NO GRENADES, BUT I LIKE IT LIKE THAT.

SOMETIMES IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT.

I GUESS ILL END IT HERE FOR NOW

I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU TWO TWICE IF NOT THRICE AS MUCH AS YOU MIGHT MISS ME TOO.

HELLO AGAIN. WERE SOMEWHERE NEAR TIKRI + MOSUL. YESTERDAY, ME + MENDOZA WENT LOOKING FOR MOMENTO’S. WE BROKE A LOCK TO A NEAR BY BUNKER AND FOUND 6 A.K.47s! BUT ON OUR WAY BACK TO TURN THEM IN, MAJOR TATU GOT THEM FROM US. I WAS SO PISSED. BUT I GOT A GAS MASK w/ FILTER, A FULL MAGAZINE CLIP FROM ONE OF THE A.K.s AND A BERET WITH IRAQ 1 RANK ON IT.

I MADE A STENCIL FOR THE TRUCK WERE RIDING IN. ITS CALLED THE “GAMBLER.” YESTERDAY MENDOZA DROVE, SO TODAY ILL BE DRIVING.

IM NOT POSITIVE, BUT, I THINK WERE GOING TO TURKEY. NIETO SAYS THAT HE OVERHEARD SOMEBODY FROM S1 (or SI, I’m not sure) SAYING WE MIGHT GET PAID EXTRA FOR GOING THROUGH BAGHDAD.

I THINK NIETO’S MAD AT ME. CANT EXPLAIN WHY. MAYBE ITS BECAUSE IM RIDING WITH MENDOZA AND HE DOESNT LIKE MENDOZA TOO MUCH. OH WELL, WHATEVER REASON, HOPE THINGS GET NORMAL AGAIN. HAVE TO GO,

*hearts and xs*

TODAY IS THE 25th OF APRIL, I RECEIVED FIVE OR SIX (OR SEVEN) LETTERS YESTERDAY. THE LATEST WAS DATED 07 OF APRIL. THAT TELLS ME THAT ITS GOING TO TAKE A WHILE TO COMMUNICATE.

WE HAVENT RECEIVED MAIL BECAUSE WEVE BEEN MOVING NEVER STAYING IN ONE PLACE MORE THAN A DAY, OR TWO, UNTIL NOW. WE’VE BEEN IN THIS SPOT GOING ON FOUR DAYS TOMORROW?!

GIVE ME A MINUTE...

FOR THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS IVE BEEN HELPING MENDOZA PULL THE ENGINE OUT OF A 5 TON TRUCK AND SWITCH IT w/ ANOTHER ONE. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN EASY BUT THE FLY WHEEL SEIZED UP INSIDE THE BELL HOUSING. ITS FINISHED NOW AND THE RUMOR IS WE’RE LEAVING  (OR MOVING) AGAIN TOMORROW.

ITS 10:33 THURSDAY MORNING. YOUR TIME IS 12:32 JUST TURNING THURSDAY.

I ALMOST CRYED WHEN I SAW ELIS PICTURE. I REALLY MISS BOTH OF YOU. LET ME BACK TO BEFORE I GOT DISTRACTED. I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO SEND MAIL BECAUSE WE’VE BEEN MOVING. BUT I GUESS THAT WHATEVER THREAT THERE WAS (IF ANY), ISNT SO THREATFUL ANYMORE, WE CAN START RECEIVING AND SENDING MAIL. NO PHONE TO CALL FROM, AND NO INTERNET TO E-MAIL FROM.

THE WHOLE UNIT IS SCATTERED, SO EVEN IF I GET WHAT YOU NEED IT’LL TAKE FOREVER TO GET IT TO YOU. LET ME PULL THOSE LETTERS BACK OUT. OH WAIT. I DID LAUNDRY AND SOME UNDERWEAR THATS DRY, FELT HARD, OH WELL, WAIT A SECOND, K

I HAD TO FOLD SOME T-SHIRTS. ALL MY SOCKS ARE STILL DAMP. 

YOU CAN USE MY CONTRACT TO SHOW THAT I ENLISTED IN TEXAS AND HOWS THIS

*On a separate sheet my dad wrote a detailed note for my mom to give to someone to confirm that he did want to buy a house. He writes “I AM ALIVE AND WELL.” and “PLEASE ACCEPT THIS PAPER”, then he signed it with his scribble signature, and underneath it wrote his name in print and added “1st SQUADRON 10th CAVALRY HEADQUARTERS TROOP (I have no clue what this means)*

HOW’S THAT? HOPE I SPELLED EVERYTHING CORRECTLY. IM ALMOST READY WITH A DESIGN TO COVER THE OTHER TATTOOS ON MY LEFT FOREARM.

I JUST FINISHED LOOKING OVER ALL THOSE LETTERS YOU SENT FOR ME

IM BACK! I GOT SLEEPY SO I TRYED TO LAY DOWN FOR A LITTLE BIT. NO SLEEP. I DONT THINK. I DIDNT HAVE ENOUGH WATER TO WASH MY DCV’S AND A PAIR OF BDV’S. BESIDES FOR DRINKING WATER, BUT WE HAVE TO CONSERVE IT.

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THE RUMORS. TOMORROW WE’LL BE LEAVING FOR THE IRAN/IRAQ BORDER TO DO “PEACE KEEPING” FOR 3 TO 6 mths. OTHERS SAY THAT THE 4ID (i think is what this says) GENERAL WANTS TO KEEP US HERE TILL NOV., THATS WHEN 1 CAV WILL COME TO REPLACE US. WHILE OTHERS SAY WE MIGHT LEAVE BY JUNE. NOTHINGS FOR SURE.

SMALLER RUMORS FLOATING AROUND THE SITE ARE; RAMSEY AND SFC BACON ARE SLEEPING TOGETHER. SGT SIREK HAS PLANS TO TAKE NIETO AS HIS APPRENTICE AND PADIWAN LEARNER OF THE DARK SIDE. LITTLE BLACK ARNOLD IS MILITARY INTELLIGENCE FOR SPECIAL FORCES OPERATING UNDER COVER A SURVEILLENCE AS PART OF

*the rest of the page is blank*

IM BACK. TODAY IS THE 27th. I GOT BACK TO THE LITTLE CAMP AREA ABOUT AN HOUR AND A HALF AGO. I LEFT YESTERDAY MORNING TO, WELL, AS PART OF DE-CON (DE-CONTAMINATION) MISSION. HERES THE INFORMATION THAT I GATHERED.

A SITE HAD BEEN FOUND THAT WAS THOUGHT TO HAVE CHEMICAL WEAPONS AND 1-10 WAS APPOINTED TO GO TO THE SITE AND DE-CON THE CIVILIANS THAT WERE GOING TO OPEN THEM. AS IT TURNS OUT THE CIVILIANS HAVE BEEN DE-LAYED AND WOULD BE SET BACK 1 DAY.

THE NBC TEAM THAT I WAS WITH WERENT PREPARED TO STAY OVER NIGHT AND AS FORCASTED BY SSG MINOR WE MIGHT HAVE HAD TO STAY 3 TO 4 DAYS. EVERYBODY WAS PISSED.

LATELY ITS BEEN GETTING REALLY COLD AT NIGHT AND WE JUST HAPPENED TO BE NEAR A RUNNING RIVER. SO THE, ITS ABOUT 9 O’CLOCK AND IM BEAT, NO SLEEPING BAG OR ANYTHING TO COVER UP WITH AND I DECIDE TO TRY AND SLEEP. I GET AS COMFORTABLE AS POSSIBLE AND I GET ATTACKED BY MOSQUITOS. NOW IM PISSED SO I DECIDED TO JUST TO STAY UP ALL NIGHT. ABOUT 10PM ONE OF THE HEMTT (this might just say “hemi”, I don’t know) FUELERS SHOWS UP AND SGT TORRES SAYS HE HAS EVERYBODYS SLEEPING BAG! THE SITES ABOUT 45 MINS AWAY AND THEY LEFT SOMETIME MID AFTERNOON TO GET OUR SHIT, I HATE THESE PEOPLE.

RIGHT NOW ITS 9:01 PM AND ITS 11:02 AM YOUR TIME. I MISS YOU.

RIGHT NOW IM GOING TO ADDRESS AN ENVELOPE AND HAVE IT READY TO SEND TOMMOROW THE 28th. IM SORRY IF IT SEEMS THAT IM NOT WRITING VERY OFTEN. FOR A WHILE WE COULDN’T. AND NOW THAT IT SEEMS WE MIGHT BE HERE A LITTLE WHILE, THEYVE KEPT ME REALLY BUSY. LET ME ADDRESS THE ENVELOPES (he drew a star here)

ALL DONE. I THOUGHT ABOUT THE HOUSE A LOT TODAY AND YESTERDAY. IM SURE BY THE TIME THIS LETTER REACHES YOU, YOU’LL HAVE EITHER GOTTEN IT OR GAVE IT UP. IM O.K. WITH EITHER DECISION YOUVE MADE.

YOUVE KEPT THIS FAMILY TOGETHER, AND THAT MAKES ME PROUD. YOUR SMART, ATTRACTIVE AND FUNNY. AND YOU DONT TAKE ANY SHIT FROM ANYBODY. I LOVE YOU.

I HOPE THAT OUR DAUGHTER TURNS OUT TO BE LIKE YOU.

I GUESS ILL MAIL THIS TOMORROW, FIRST THING, SO

EVER YOURS

EVER MINE

*my dad signed it with his scribble, and wrote his name under it. under that are hearts and x’s with my mom’s name and then my name under hers.*

[dontshouta]

heeey! can i request bakugo, izuku, shoto and shinsou with an s/o that is a bad influence for them (they manipulate the boys to skip classes, make them jealous/angry just for fun, etc) and then someone or something makes them snap and realize that their s/o is not good? i really like ur writing and really liked this idea but it's ok if you dont feel like doing them

this request made me 🥺 why must u make me write these dumb boys bad 😔 theyre doing their best okay. also i know u didn’t make this exclusively reader x bnha but like. I wanted a happy ending okay.

Bakugou Katsuki:

You were sat in your usual seat in the back of the class, your eyes lazily sweeping over the heads of your peers. Professor Yamada was droning on about some grammatically incorrect sentences in the background of your own thoughts, your mind elsewhere while you drew incoherent doodles in the margins of your notes.

English was your last class for the day, the clock ticking ever so slowly while you thought of any last minute plans you could make with your friends. You thought you could go to the mall with Mina, you needed a new pair of shoes and you knew she wouldn’t do you wrong. Or, you could hang out at Sero and Kaminari’s place, you’ve been meaning to bum out and have a movie night with those two. Or maybe, you could grab some lunch with Bakug-

Where the hell was Bakugou?

Your eyes jumped to stare into his empty desk, burning imaginary holes into the seat while searching through your mind’s eye to figure out why on Earth he would be gone. Bakugou never missed a day of class, so why now? Did he catch a cold? Does he have a dentist’s appointment? Was he abducted by aliens? Did he get hit by a-

Suddenly, the classroom door swung open and in came the culprit. Along with a demon clinging onto his arm. You rolled your eyes, a sigh escaping through your lips as you watched the two make their way to their respective seats. Of course she was the reason why he was late.

“Ahh, sorry professor!” She cooed, mock saluting poor Professor Yamada. “Didn’t realize we were so late, right Katsuki?”

You knew the rat was lying through her teeth. You knew she would rather die than come into class early like a normal student. You glared seething hatred into the back of her head, watching as her hand stayed glued to Bakugou’s arm, even as they sat in their seats. 

Bakugou merely grunted in response, his eyes downcast while he settled in. You wanted to get up and pull him by the ear out of the classroom and give that dumb boy a stern talking to but you had at least some restraint. You studied the boy’s face closely, and you felt your heart sink. You couldn’t remember the last time you saw him look so… anguished. His expression was so openly conflicted you couldn’t help the feeling of dejection filling your tight chest.

After class, you launched yourself to Bakugou before his demon of a girlfriend could sink her claws into him first and hightailed it out of the classroom without a trace.

“Y/N- what- where the fuck are you taking me!” He growled, trying to shake himself from you. 

“We need to have a little chit-chat Bakugou.” You started, rounding a corner into a little nook where you and Bakugou could talk without any disturbances. “I saw your face, I know you’re not happy with what happened today. What’s going on?”

Bakugou was quiet for a moment, emotions flickering through his face until he finally broke the silence with a deep sigh.

“This isn’t the first time this sort of thing happened… She keeps forcing me to skip my classes and shit and I don’t know why but I just can’t fucking say no. What the fuck is up with that? Since when have I ever been a damn toy for some girl? This shit’s been really pissing me off but I haven’t done jack shit about it!”

You could see the anger coursing through his body as he restrained himself from probably yeeting you into space. You felt angry. Angry because you didn’t notice his inner turmoil earlier and even angrier because of the person doing this. Didn’t she care for Bakugou at all? What a shitty girlfriend. You wouldn’t treat him like this.

“Bakugou,” You placed a comforting hand on his bicep, squeezing the hard muscle tightly to show your support. “I think you should break up with her. I’ve never had a good feeling about her in the first place and I hate seeing you so miserable because of some obnoxious brat.”

He reached up to squeeze your hand back before removing it entirely from his arm with a heavy sigh. 

“Thanks, Y/N.. Even though you’re always in my fuckin’ business I appreciate you knocking some damn sense into my head.”

You gave him a bright smile. “Of course! I’d hate to see my favorite rat in distress!” You puffed your chest out with pride. “Now you owe me, how about taking me out on a date once your free from the devil’s clutches?”

With a roll of his eyes he ruffled your hair, a smirk playing on his lips while he abandoned your super secret hiding spot. Hands shoved into his jeans pockets, he looked over his shoulder, a cocky look in his eyes. 

“I knew you only wanted me to break up with her just so you could get a shot at me. You’re playing a dangerous game, Y/N.”

A furious blush erupted onto your cheeks as you wildly yelled at the boy. The only response he so graciously gave you was a wink and a chuckle, causing your shouts behind him to grow tenfold.

You were left with red cheeks and a shy smile as you watched Bakugou escape your sight. You just hoped the stupid boy would actually break up with the witch or you feared you’d meddle again and do it yourself.

Midoriya Izuku:

Click. Click. Click. Click. ClickClickClickClickClickClickClickClick-

“Okay, Mido, I’m taking that from you.” You snatched the boy’s pen from his hand before he could protest and shoved it into your jacket pocket. His face flushed as he muttered incoherent excuses under his breath, the mess of hair on top of his head bobbing while he jittered in his seat.

You’d hoped you could have a relaxing study session with Midoriya in the local coffee shop but the poor boy had been fidgeting ever since the pair of you entered the establishment.

“Mido, what’s wrong? You’re more spazzy than usual.” 

You watched as he rolled his bottom lip in between his teeth while staring at something behind you, causing a large sigh to escape from your lips.

“Dude, are you zoning out again? I asked you a ques-” Just as you started talking you turned to see what he was staring at, as soon as your eyes landed on the scene behind you you whipped right back around with wide eyes.

“Yo, isn’t that your boyfriend??” Your eyes were wide with concern,  your body frantically forcing itself in front of Midoriya’s line of sight. “Mido, he’s all over that guy, did you guys break up or something?”

You wanted nothing more than to launch yourself from your seat to beat the other boy up but you held yourself back to hear out your friend instead.

Midoriya raked both of his hands through his hair, mumbling as he did so. He slumped back into his chair in defeat, his face scrunching up in both anger and betrayal.

“Haha.. no, Y/N. Um, he’s-he’s been doing this for a while actually haha.. At first it was kinda cute I guess but now I’m not sure if he even likes me anymore. I don’t like being jealous, Y/N.. I don’t even feel like it’s worth the hassle anymore..” 

Your heart broke for him, watching him struggle with his emotions right in front of you. You stole a quick peek behind you again, your eyes meeting the flirting boy’s briefly. His eyebrow cocked up, almost making you jump out of your seat to defend your friend. You felt the need to fight a bitch growing now more than ever.

“Dude what the hell, he’s doing it on purpose?? What’s his deal? Is he so insecure in your relationship that he has to openly flirt with someone else? Mido, you don’t deserve that.” You took his hand in yours as you watched tears well up in his angry eyes. A watery laugh bubbled out from his as a sneaky tear slipped down his cheek.

“Y/N I feel so stupid right now! I can’t even muster up the courage to tell him off-”

A hand wrapped tightly around your arm and ripped it away from Midoriya, you winced in pain as it was suddenly ripped in the wrong direction.

“Yo, what the fu-”

“Get your hands off him, freak. He’s my boyfriend, remember?”

Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. You stood, your body silently fuming as his words hit your ears. Your arm slightly aching at the socket, adding fuel to the already blazing fire. Who the fuck does this man think he is? You made a mental note to have Todoroki melt your arm off later.

“You’re one to talk! You’ve been all over that guy the entire time we’ve been here! And Mido’s been telling me this isn’t the first time this has happened. You have no right to come up to me, physically injure me, and tell me that I can’t comfort my hurting friend over some douchebag like you. Frankly, I’m fucking disgusted that you had the balls to pull that shit with me.”

Midoriya stood too, his chair screeching as it was pushed back with force. He planted himself between the two of you, a fiery look in his eye as he jutted his chin out to address his “boyfriend”.

“You can play with my heart all you want. You can keep making me skip my classes. You can keep pressuring me to do stuff I don’t want to. You can keep making me jealous. You can keep flirting with other guys. But you, hurting one of my best friends, crosses the line. You need to go. Don’t bother trying to contact me, as of now, you’re nothing to me.”

Before the weasel can so much as object, Midoriya gathered everything from your abandoned table, took your hand, and rushed out of the coffee shop. 

The two of you walked in silence for a couple of blocks, Midoriya’s hand still gripping yours like his life depended on it. Causing your cheeks to flush and your heart to accelerate even more than it already has.

“M-Midoriya, I think we’re good.. now” 

The boy suddenly stopped, causing you to crash into his back. A small ow sounded from you, your hand rubbing your nose while you silently cursed the literal brick house in front of you. How could a sweet, innocent guy like Midoriya be so fuckin’ stacked?

“Y/N.. thank you for sticking up for me back there.. I know I wouldn’t have had the confidence to tell him off if you weren’t there to do it first.” 

“It was no problem, Mido! What’re friends for?”

“Haha yeah.. Friends..”

Todoroki Shouto:

It was around 3 AM. Honestly, you weren’t really sure what time it was exactly but what you were sure of was the fact that it was way past your bedtime. You wanted nothing more than to collapse onto your bed without a second thought but you couldn’t ignore your growling stomach. So, you were posted in front of the microwave like a soldier guarding a princess, waiting for your good ‘ol cuppa mac n cheese to finish.

You heard the front door to the dorms open and shut, two pairs of wobbly footsteps entering with angry shushes accompanying them. You moved from your position, making your way out of the kitchen and towards the two people trying, and failing, to keep quiet.

“Todoroki? What’re you doing here so late? Shouldn’t you be in-”

The other person shushed you, eyebrows set in a tired frown as they clung to Todoroki desperately. Something was off.

“What the fuck’re you so loud for? Shove off why don’t you? It’s none of your business.” 

You were shocked to the point where you couldn’t get a clever retort in even if you tried. Which pained you. But, you couldn’t leave it at that. You would’ve loved to pretend like you didn’t see them, but you couldn’t ignore Todoroki’s look of displeasure on his usually calm, beautiful face.

“Dude, as much as I would like to ignore you for the rest of my life, I can’t just let you drag around Todoroki like that. Can’t you tell he’s uncomfortable?”

They just rolled their eyes, hands tightening on Todoroki’s shirt possessively. You felt your own hands ball into fists, your patience thinning in the company of the little troll.

“Like I said, it’s none of your business.” Their response rewarded a scoff from you, you refused to let them get away with whatever they were trying to do. It didn’t seem right, not one bit.

“Um. But it is my business. Todoroki’s my friend and I’m not gonna leave you alone until you leave him alone.”

“Ha!” They barked, hand fluttering onto their chest haughtily. “You think he’d rather be with you? What, you confused or something? He’s dating me, smartass. Not you.”

“Actually, I’d much rather be with Y/N right now.. If you don’t mind.” Todoroki’s speech was slightly slurred as he spoke, his eyes barely following your movements as he slumped over.

His date physically recoiled, an incredulous look painting their already angry features as they pushed the drunk boy onto you without any care.

“Fine, like I care. When you come to your fucking senses, I’ll be in my room.”

With a huff, they were gone. You were left with the barely sober man who slowly wrapped his arms around you, using you as his support while the two of you stood without a word.

A million thoughts were racing through your mind as you assessed the situation. Todoroki and his date came super late into the dorms, drunk. His date tried to get him up into one of their respective rooms, together. The thought made your skin crawl, hoping the events that would’ve transpired were more innocent than you thought. 

Todoroki shifted in your arm, his face nuzzling into your neck with his hot breath fanning against your cool skin.

“Um- uhh, Todoroki? Do you want me to take you to your room? You should sleep, it’s super late.”

The boy hummed, his face burrowing deeper into your neck, making a surprised squeal erupt from your lips while goosebumps exploded onto your skin. You felt hot, your whole body burning from the sudden affection.

“No.. I’d rather be right. Here.” The boy said it with such finality you wondered if he’d sobered up right then and there. You wished he did though, he was getting heavier and heavier in your arms. You would be surprised if the two of you didn’t collapse onto the floor.

“Todo, you’re drunk, please lemme take you upstairs.”

He let out a small whine, his hands wrapping around you tighter. He shook his head no while still buried in your neck, tickling you and causing you to giggle. Oh man, he was going to be the death of you. With a defeated sigh, you ran your fingers through his hair to try and appease the drunk brat latched onto you.

“I like you better than them, Y/N. You’re nice to me and don’t make me go out clubbing every night.”

Your heart raced, the hand in his hair stopping its ministrations to process the words that had just came out of your drunk companion. This was a usual thing, wasn’t it? The poor boy must always be tired. Come to think of it, there has been some uncharacteristic dark circles under his eyes lately. You wanted to sleep with him every night to make sure he was getting a good night’s sleep.

“Todo, if you don’t like them, break up with them. It’s that simple.”

He moved his face from it’s spot in your neck and rested his chin on your sternum, mismatched eyes staring into yours earnestly.

“If I do, can I be with you instead?”

Shinsou Hitoshi:

You knew you were being creepy. You could feel it in your bones. The creep factor was up by 50% with the way you were slinking around in the library. You couldn’t help it though, you knew something was up as soon as you saw them walk in.

You watched with narrowed eyes as Shinsou and his girlfriend walked through the library. Shinsou looked as passive as always, but you knew him better than that. You could practically feel the discomfort coming off him in waves. 

You wanted to confront them but something was stopping you. You knew you couldn’t just come up to the two and start accusing his girlfriend of something you don’t know anything about. You didn’t want to make a scene. Yet. So, like the nosy bitch you were, you decided to snoop.

“Hitoshi, just use your quirk, yeah? Do it for me? Please?” The way she pranced around him and hung onto his arm for dear life made you want to gag. But you were more concerned about her trying to coerce Shinsou to use his quirk.

For what? What was she trying to accomplish? Did she want something from someone? Why were they in the library? What was the point of all this?

“You know I’m not comfortable with using my quirk for things like that, so why do you keep asking?”

“Well, you’re my boyfriend, shouldn’t you make an exception for me? It’s not like you’ve denied me before.”

You furrowed your brow. She’s been making him use his quirk without his full consent? Why would he let her do that? You found the whole thing to be completely and utterly. Whack. You really didn’t understand what was happening so you continued your snooping adventure.

“Yeah, well, I just don’t wanna do it anymore. Like, you keep making me use my quirk for villainous shit. You do realize I’m trying to prove to everyone that it could be used for heroing too, right? You’re my girlfriend, shouldn't you understand?”

Hearing him use her own words against her made your chest swell with pride. Fuck yeah, Shinsou baby, tell that bitch what’s up. But then you felt it sink right back down after processing his words. She’s been making him use his quirk, with dubious consent, for villainous activities? That’s more than whack. She’s in a school for heroes for crying out loud, surely she’d know better than that?

“Hitoshi, it’s all just a little bit of fun! We’re not hurting anybody, and nobody knows its us! it’s a win-win if I do say so myself.”

At this point, you couldn’t keep yourself concealed, you had to give her a piece of your mind. You sprang from your hiding spot and rushed towards the two, an accusing finger pointing right at the little gremlin woman who claimed to be Shinou’s lovely girlfriend.

“Listen up ya little wench, I think you’re gross for trying to use my buddy Shinsou for your little games! How could you do that? Shinsou’s such a genuine person trying to be a hero and here you are ruining it for him! You make me sick!”

She all but huffed before stomping away, flipping you off behind her back and motioning between her and Shinsou before making a heart and breaking it. 

“Did she just break up with me?”

His casual nonchalance at the whole fiasco caused a cackle to erupt from your chest, hand slapping at his hard chest as you fought your raucous giggles.

“Good riddance! I couldn’t stand to hear her babble on any longer.” You huffed and crossed your arms, making sure to stick your tongue out at her retreating form.

“So.. you were spying on me.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yeah? And? I could smell her bad intentions from a mile away, you should thank me.”

“How about I thank you over some dinner?”

[delbeugre]

Have you seen SADIE BEUGRE? DEL is in HER/THEIR SENIOR year. The MATHEMATICS MAJOR is 24 years old & is a CAPRICORN. People say SHE/THEY are GRITTY, BEWITCHING, RETICENT and WASPISH. Rumors say they’re a member of HASTINGS. I heard from the gossip blog that SHE BIT AN EX-BOYFRIEND’S PINKY FINGER OFF AFTER SHE FOUND OUT HE CHEATED, AND THEN HAPPILY SERVED TIME FOR IT.

im tommy im a freak and of course i am here to get freakalicious with u all... this is my newest frankenstein type creation named sadie i know .02% about her yet but i am more than confident she will b nothing but a fun time! like this if ur down to plot!

TW: VIOLENCE, MENTIONS OF JAIL/PROSECUTION, MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, DRUG USE

BACKSTORY

capricorn sun / virgo moon / scorpio rising

raised by her uncle Big (his name) who is a hermit shut in town local in the depths of the florida marshland like some goosebumps protagonist. hes gone far past socially acceptable in terms of his ability to connect with the modern person but is wise beyond belief... his whole vibe is a warped cross between a cryptid and a mountain man that forages and cooks neighborhood plants. married for 27 years before his wife passed from illness. its quite possibly the only thing hes ever been emotional about

but dels entry to his life throws a wrench in his sadness (despite abandonment being what they bond over). she takes the focus away from his loss with her presence; her dad, his brother, died in a tragic train-car collision around the same time (which is speculated to be a suicide bt nobody can ever really be sure). he was a single parent so her custody is thrown up in the air for a few months as cps decides what they r gna do with this freshly orphaned little scrapper

she just kinda turns up on his doorstep n from there they cohabit a space. shes arnd 6-7 at this time... big never seemed to b phased by the fact tht she was a child n tended to treat her more like an apprentice or guest. he was never close to her father because of their age difference, being the older out of the two, so to have his daughter become his responsibility is just..... weird

this doesnt mean that he wouldnt provide for her bt it was. not very parental whatsoever.... no conversation or interaction beyond what was necessary. she was a mute fr a while and still is? to a degree.... very short spoken

when she got to her preteens he offered her an allowance in exchange for little odds and ends of stuff to be taken care of around the house. errands n all tht.... sometimes he wld purposefully leave things for her to pick up n take care of without mentioning it for a bonus. taught her the importance of saving your money and the horrid corruptness of a society basing everythings worth off paper. big exposed her to a lot of knowledge and took advantage of her silent curiosity by fueling it with books, homeschooling, life skills (catching a fish, setting a trap, knowing your berries in the woods...... the works)

her teens carried out the same way bt with the introduction of a real job, a spot down at the local butcher shop checking people out at the register and helping around the back of house. del knows a great deal abt cow/pig/chicken/etc anatomy from her years here..... she committed to being 100% vegan into her early twenties because of her trauma frm this occupation

it paid very well tho n was the best gig she was going to get within a reasonable biking route from home. so she settled!

the plan wasnt to keep it up for long anyway. she worked rly hard for her spot at yates and didnt intend to ever screw herself over. her plan was to get her bachelors, masters, become a professor, pursue a personal hobby of agriculture and build an elaborate greenhouse to live in

bt things happen..... 

some 35yr old douche with a green thumb woos her at a gardening store n swoops in to teach her a little more abt romance; all of this, of course, under the guise that he had all these tips and tricks for living environmentally friendly. a lame hippie wannabe that shouldve never even approached her bt alas.... he did

love is a touchy subject n it hadnt been something she set her sights on, but she was interested in wht this dude could teach her n at 19 she ended up falling in love. she delayed her education to stay an extra year back home and work out another plan which included him

this was very disappointing to her uncle bt he didnt have anything to say abt it. it was never parental before n it was never going to be, so this was another lesson she wld just have to overcome on her own

it turns out that she doesnt care for infidelity. when the confession comes out its met with a lot of screaming, bawling, blistering white hot anger. the whole incident is blacked out of her mind to b honest....

matters of the heart are no longer something to concern herself with because of the repercussions of her rash behavior regarding heartbreak O________O she spent a year in jail n still has to attend therapy / anger management meetings

deep down she is still hurting. there was a lot of pain... bt the sadness is not over the loss of some noob. she is in a state of constant disappointment, detaching from herself out of shame. putting her own life on pause only for it to turn out like that? stupid stupid stupid... 

PERSONALITY

chugging along! tldr spectre-like swamp nymph aura with the slightest (not so slight) unhinged feral tendencies

delicate like a moth resting in the gleam of a flashlight.... her anger singes her wings when shes too comfortable staying in one place, so theres always constant stimulation, always shifting gears. shes prone to feeling threatened; that being said, sadie is wary of walking in crowds, a little bit skittish when approached without making eye contact beforehand. like a small grey kitten..... in a big wide world

has a hard time keeping a conversation bt is very interested in debate, and even more so in studying alongside someone in complete silence. it reminds her of home in the same sense tht her uncle wld nudge her to keep reading by always having his own book open

doesnt have many friends and is alright with that. rumors are tht she is still a virgin bt who really knows? not i...... bt i wldnt be surprised if this was true. shes not impressed by people nor material items so this whole yates crowd is a turn off

she is truly clueless when it comes to how to behave around anyone her age. i think she understands but it just doesnt compute. she could come off as impolite bt it is just standoffishness? some people cld try to crack her but i dont think even she knows what that would be, or what that would look like. even in her one (1) failed relationship it was never deep heart to hearts or sharing dinner..... solitude is her realm

del is very comfortable with herself, very open with her wardrobe! doesnt leave too much to the imagination? she appreciates the human experience n expresses that thru this whole “body is a temple” type thing.... not quite confidence, but proudness of being. has gotten multiple notices frm professors for her tops being too sheer, nylons too ratted up, etc. has dirt under her fingernails half the time, chipped polish, some chapstick. smudges her eyeshadow on with her fingers

doesnt smoke cigarettes all too often but is dependent on weed. it kinda perpetuates her paranoid demeanor bt at the same time it keeps her lax enough to be able to mentally handle city life

her room is a playground for huge monstera plants, christmas cacti, ivy creeping along the doorway. she sleeps on a tiny thin mattress on the floor with a linen sheet and has her books stacked up on the ground next to it to hold her ashtray. the whole thing is dumb empty

takes her studies seriously and pinches every penny she can..... she has never ordered herself a coffee frm somewhere before, ordered food frm a restaurant... nothing. i wld think the most she would branch out from harvesting everything on her own is buying a bag of sunflower seeds frm a gas station, but even then, she much prefers eating stuff she grows herself. has a tomato plant, some basil beginning to sprout, etc.... manageable crops for any college students tiny space

...

bt yea thats it thats all! connections cld be all over the place. im legit open to anything. theres only a few tht come to mind right off that bat: 

a few people that get along with her? same classes? they shared a bowl n now theyre getting into the nitty gritty of some personal conversation that is veering into no mans land....

some sort of clueless makeover moment? arent rly into sadie as a person bt see a lot of potential... perhaps need a plus one to a party on the fly and figure thats the best option theyve got

crushes? this wld be fun n potentially dangerous! like playing with a hot cast iron pan or something :)

again im vry new to rp so i wld like to leave a lot of stuff up to chemistry, brainstorming n stuff like that, but please consider everything on the table! what i hav mentioned is the tip of the iceberg im so burnt out n i wrote a lot more than i intended to i am so sorry but i promise i am friendly

[smalltcwnkiids-blog]

----- okay. so. this is something i don’t really want to do, but also, i feel like i need to do it. because at this point im just. tired. im putting this under a read more in case it gets long, but please give it a read, because it kind of is important? mind you when i say important i mean, to the point of, if you don’t agree with me just don’t talk about it because I’d rather not discourse on this. this is not meant for drama or callouts. i just don’t know how else to do it.

so, a very important note here, though it’s one that i truly prefer to keep under wraps because acknowledging it just flares things up. i’m not cis. (and no, i don’t want to be friends because uwu we’re both trans)

i’ve dealt with the whole dysphoria shebang for half of my life actively, it took me years to come to terms with it, and yeah, im definitely still struggling. i fucking wish i was cis. cis girl, cis guy, i couldn’t care less. i wish i didn’t have to go through this shit on the daily. i wish acknowledging that im trans didnt make me feel like some fucking shitty edgelord. blah blah edge edge, no i don’t want to talk about it, no i dont want to be your insight onto what its like to be trans.

but i do want to be the person who tells you that it’s apparently a lot easier to write trans people in a way that makes me, personally, uncomfortable, than i thought. and obviously we aren’t all the same. there are people out there who genuinely have their only personality point being that theyre trans. but you know what? that’s unhealthy. and in a fucking roleplay character?? if you roleplay a trans character and their main focus is that theyre trans when you, the mun, are cis, you’re doing a whole fucking lot wrong in my opinion.

i don’t know what to expect, because this is the south park roleplay community of all places. of course it’s full of bullshit, but most of it I can just ignore. Hell!! I was fine with the Ms. Garrison stuff in canon! So I think it really says something that yall are getting to me so bad.

so, okay, here’s the thing. If the mun is trans, they can do whatever they want, because, that’s an experience they go through every single day. yes, there are trans people who will play on them being trans for things. yes, there are trans people who would be happier if they were cis. yes, there are trans people who’s only personality point is that theyre lgbt. and those are all uncomfortable to see in writing for me, but it can’t be denied that they exist. and if its written by a trans person then, well, fuck, they know what they’re doing.

it’s when a trans character falls into the hands of a cis mun that things get.. really easy to fuck up, apparently. and it shouldnt be the case. like i can let things fly so easily but fuck, man. let me just. okay.

if the main or only thing about your muse is that theyre trans: you better be focusing on how that’s unhealthy. if it’s your focus for other reasons its gonna come across bad no matter what. ‘unu look at this poow baby suffew for being twans’ , ‘THIS IS MY TRANS CHARACTER LOOK THEYRE TRANS IM AN ALLY’, ‘i have no clue what im doing but i sure can make angst out of this’ (and that last one honestly while reflecting how shitty life can be for trans people is offensive)

if a big part of your trans muse is using them in sex and being very explicit about them being trans during it: hi! let me introduce you to a term called fetishization! yes, some trans people do it to themselves for the money or simply because it’s something they enjoy. and while i approve of them being so body confident, i cant say im happy theyre adding fuel to the fire of fetishization. being trans is not inherently something sexual. being trans should not be the focus of smut. you can write smut with a trans character, sure! thats fine! honestly that part is normalization if anything, and i encourage it. and i can look past a few mildly wrong details and iffy wording. but if youre either turning smut to partial angst because of your trans muse, or like. focusing a LOT on how your muse is trans, especially if its omg theyre trans and with somebody cis. you can understand what i mean here, right?

if a big part of your trans muse is them wanting to be cis (main thing being trans part 2!): you better be trans too. babe hold my fuckin flower because i will end your life if you have a trans muse as a cis person JUST to focus on them wanting to be cis. or magicing away the fact that theyre trans!! especially if thats not EXPLICITLY what something says. this one. really gets me.

like i said up there, i wish i could be cis. fuck, letting my edge fly free, sometimes i wish i could repress it all and put up a permanent mental barrier and just be happy where i am now. life is a fucking pain. i exist every day doubting myself, knowing where i stand and the fact i physically cant present myself as.. myself. and that can’t be magiced away. and i hate to see it being focused on, because i spend forever trying to repress that stupid fucking yearning. and i hate to see it be used for angst!! i hate to see it all thrown around so casually, like none of it means anything. like its okay because ‘uwu im not a transphobe’ but if you fetishize or only use your muse being trans for angst or magic away them being trans, NEWS FLASH, to me, you are!!!!

playing a trans muse is a delicate thing, apparently, but ive never in my life seen it fucked up as bad as i have here. this is worse then ‘i was ben now im benitta’

[analisegrey]

Februwhump Prompt:

“Who would the whumpee take a beating for?” (Read on AO3)

Caleb’s always been goal-oriented.

He likes having something to strive for, a box he can mark off when he’s accomplished something; that inclination is honed when he gets to Soltryce- each new spell he learns, every milestone of knowledge, he goes after with fevered abandon. His time in the country with Master Ikithon doesn’t exactly dampen the tendency. The desire to please combined with the need to hit the next goal, do the next thing, pressing ever forward- it’s a terrible and heady combination that Trent utilizes ruthlessly.

And still, after all that, after breaking and reforming, after traveling alone, after finally finding new companions, he’s still goal-oriented. He has one large, overwhelming goal, and it’s always in the back of his mind, waiting, but sometimes it gets overshadowed, pushed temporarily to the side by immediate need.

For instance-

The cell they’re in is cool and damp, moisture dripping down the walls in shining rivulets. Jester’s out cold when they’re dragged in, but Caleb’s awake, if only barely, and so catches pieces of conversation, taunts and threats. He’s known jailers like this before, had suffered extensively under them in the jail where he met Nott. He knows the type- overconfident, cruel, inclined to go after the weakest, softest target, because they don’t want a challenge so much as a reaction.

Caleb weighs his options as he waits for Jester to wake up. They’re both spent from the fight before they were captured, and he knows that especially without his components, they’re on their own until help arrives. He’s moved her so her head is pillowed on his lap, and he absently cards his fingers through her hair as he thinks. He knows this type of people, knows what they’re capable of, how they react, who they’ll likely go for once they’re ready to start. He knows, and he refuses to let that happen.

There’s a rustle of fabric and a shift of movement as Jester starts to wake up, groaning as her eyes slit open.

“What- what happened, where-”

Caleb gently squeezes her shoulder. “I am afraid things went rather poorly, Jester. We are in a cell.”

Her brow crinkles in confusion before her eyes go wide and she jolts up to sitting, Caleb barely leaning back in time to avoid getting knocked in the chin. She’s scrambling to her feet and heading for the door before Caleb can stop her, her fingers digging into the edges where the frame and the door meet, looking for purchase, for a catch, anything, as her tail lashes behind her.

“We need to get out, we need to get the door open, we have to leave- ”

Caleb gets up and moves to her side, catching carefully at her wrists and tugging. He knows he has no hope of moving her if she doesn’t want to allow it, and is relieved when she lets him.

“Jester, you must be calm.”

She turns to him wild-eyed and pale, her skin washed out to a sickly light blue. “Caleb-” Her voice wavers with panic, and his resolve only strengthens as he gets a more secure grip on her and pulls. She goes with him as he leads her back to the far wall and sits, bringing her with him; her skirts pool around her, and he puts an arm around her after only a moment’s hesitation. She’s shaking, her breathes quick and hitching, and he’s familiar enough with the sounds of panic and terror to recognize it. He gives her a squeeze.

“Jester, I know this is frightening. It’s not a great situation, but we must believe the others will come and get us out. We have done it before, and they will do it again.”

“I know, I know , it’s just, what will happen in the meantime? I can’t- I can’t do that again, Caleb, I can’t- ”

If his plan’s going to work, he needs her calm, needs her strong. He feels for her, he does, but he needs her to get herself under control.

“Jester.” He keeps his voice soft, calm, soothing, and takes her by the shoulders, turning her to face him. “I know this is a terrible situation, and while neither of us wants to be here, this is especially hard for you after everything you have been through. I can’t guarantee everything will be okay right now, but I believe- I have to believe- that the others are coming, and we just need to be strong until then.”

She sniffles, eyes red-tinged and wet as she looks up at him. He knows how strong she is, physically and emotionally, but right now she looks small, frightened, and he’s reminded how young and sheltered she is, and he feels the protective urge he normally feels for her surge. He will not let them hurt her, not if he has anything to say about it.

“I need you to listen to me, Jester, you can do that, ja ?”

She nods, though she doesn’t look very sure, and he smiles.

“The men who brought us here are going to come back.” She freezes under his hands, her breath starting to pick up again, and he squeezes, trying to ground her. “They are going to come back, but I have a plan. I will not let them harm you; but you must work with me. I can only do so much, so you must be strong. I need you to look fearsome.”

Her brows furrow again in confusion as she looks him over, her tail moving agitatedly behind her. “But how will you do that? They took all your stuff, Caleb, your components, your coat, your books- how are we going to fight back?”

He shakes his head. “My plan is not to fight, not with magic or fists. I plan to fight with this,” he says as he taps his temple with a finger. “I do not need to be stronger or have my components in order to out-think them. I am going to play a part, and I need you to as well for it to work. It will be scary, but I know you can do it. You are a very good actress, ja? They will not know what hit them.”

Her eyes narrow momentarily, and he worries she’s figured him out, but then her face relaxes and she gives him a tremulous smile, which he mirrors back to her.

“Okay, I think I can do that, Caleb.”

“I know you can, blueberry.”

She smile brightens at the nickname, as he’d hoped it would. Now for the hard part.

“I need you to promise me something though, Jester. This is very important.”

“What?”

“When they come back, I want you to try to get in front of me. I am also going to be acting a part, and it may be difficult to watch, but I need you not to interfere otherwise. Whatever you see me do, whatever you hear me say, just know that I’m acting, and it will be alright. Can you do that?”

Her lips press together, pensive and pinched, the dark blue of her lips paling before she nods, her expression growing hard and resolute. “Okay okay okay, yes, I can do this. We will get through this, and the others will come, and everything will be okay.”

He smiles at her, and he hopes it doesn’t look as much like a grimace as it feels.

They pass the time chatting about nonsense and when they hear a door clang open nearby they both tense. In the last few seconds before the cell door opens, he turns and whispers, “Don’t forget- you are fierce, blueberry, and I am just acting.”

The door swings open and Jester plays her part perfectly, straightening up and snarling an oath in Infernal, coming to her feet in front of him as he slowly gets to his behind her, feigning weakness.

One of the few benefits of being a self-confessed coward, of being afraid nearly all the time, is that when it matters, when it’s actually helpful , it’s no hardship to play the weakling. He barely has to try for the fear he normally keeps bottled up show readily on his face, for the near-constant dread to become manifest. When their jailers enter the room, Caleb presses himself back against the wall, shuddering as the cold and damp seep in through the thin fabric of his shirt. He hunches inward, makes himself look small, an easy target, and bless the two buffoons holding them captive, they buy it.

“Grab him. Let’s make ‘im squeal.”

Caleb’s eyes go wide in only partially-feigned horror, and shakes his head, pressing back further, though there’s nowhere to go.

“Nein , no, please- ”

Jester tries to stay in front of him but fierce as she is, she’s easily thrown aside. Their captors may be immensely stupid and easily manipulated, but they’re strong, grabbing him with ease and carrying him toward the door. He plays it up, yelling and pleading in a way that normally would fill him with shame, but he’s fueled by his need to keep them focused on him and their attention away from Jester. He gets a last glimpse of her as they pull him through the door and she looks utterly stricken; he hopes she’ll forgive him eventually.

He’s taken down the hall to a room that's bare except for a wooden chair in the middle of it. They throw him onto it, and one of them hauls back and punches him in the jaw, snapping his head to the side and setting his ears ringing. By the time his head clears, his arms have been wrenched behind him and his wrists tightly bound and anchored to the chair. He struggles and they laugh, each grabbing an ankle even as he tries to kick at them; they tie those to the chair as well until soon he’s completely helpless. He tries not to panic, reminds himself he wanted this, that this was his preferred outcome, but it’s difficult to remember when one of the men is standing in front of him grinning and the other is behind him with a large meaty hand clamped on his shoulder. The hand on his shoulder slides to his throat, gripping and pulling his head up and back and for a split second he feels a flash of real fear, thinks he's miscalculated terribly, but then the other man slams his fist into Caleb's stomach, and the fear is replaced with a calmer resignation. His body tries to fold over, but the ropes at his wrists and the hand at his throat keep him from moving, so all he can do is choke on a cry and shake. They work him over with the ease of long practice, moving in tandem and causing pain with little break between. He's quickly breathless, screams caught in his throat as blows rain down faster than he can process. At one point a blow knocks him sideways and the whole chair tilts precariously before it tips, taking him with it. He feels it as his left arm snaps at the forearm when his whole weight, chair and all, land on it; he's screamed himself hoarse but still finds voice enough to cry out. The men just laugh and continue, and throughout the beating the thought Caleb keeps firmly situated in his mind is, ‘At least it’s not Jester.’

The men start to slow down, tired and covered in sweat, and Caleb would breathe a sigh of relief if he could; his ribs scream at him when he draws breath, his broken arm a throbbing misery at his side. He hurts everywhere, bursts of pain so prevalent it’s difficult to tell where one begins and another ends. They untie his legs, then his arms, and his vision goes dim and watery as they pick him up again, heedless of his broken arm, and drag him back through the door and down the hallway to the cell.

He desperately wants to pass out, to get away from the pain if only for a little while, but he can’t yet. There’s still one more part of this to do before he can allow himself the respite of unconsciousness.

They slam the door to the cell open and toss him through it. He's unable to catch himself and lands awkwardly on his front, his broken arm hitting the ground with enough force that he thinks he does pass out, if only for a few seconds. The next moment he’s aware it’s to find gentle hands on his face, warm and careful as they feel around his cheeks and jaw.

“Oh, Caleb- ” That’s Jester, and she sounds anguished. He forces his eyes open to look up at her and she’s blurry, but he thinks that’s mostly do to his eyes being partially swollen shut than anything else. She looks like she’s been crying, her face crumpled in distress, and he reaches for one of her hands with his good one.

“Jester, it’s okay.” It’s hard to speak, his voice barely there, his throat burning with the effort.

Her face twists, grief and anger warring with each other for dominance in her expression. “Caleb, it is not okay.” Her hands flex minutely on his face and he winces at the pressure on the bruising he can feel painting his skin. “Do you even know what you look like? Look what they’ve done to you, Caleb, your arm, and your face, and, and-” She looks perilously close to tears, and while it guts him to see it, he holds tight to the fact that it’s him here on the floor beat to shit, and not her, that it’s him with the broken arm and ribs, not her. He remembers- because he always remembers, doesn’t he?- what she looked like when they found her and Fjord and Yasha at the Sour Nest. Dirty, bruised, tear-streaked and devastated, and there’s not a lot he’s proud of in his life, but this is one thing he can hold onto. He kept this from happening to her, from happening to her again. She may have experienced this kind of cruelty, but he’s had practice, and if there’s any benefit to the things that have happened in his life, it’s that it’s prepared him for this, has put him in a position to be able to spare Jester.

He manages to pull a smile out for her, squeezes one of her wrists in a shaking hand before letting his arm fall back to his side.

“It’s alright, Jester. It is- it’s better this way. You are stronger anyway, ja? If we need to fight to get out, it’s better that you be strong and healthy.” He’s trying to focus, to stay awake to keep her company, but it’s so hard. His words are slurring, and it’s probably not a great idea to fall asleep, but he doesn’t think he’s going to have a choice in a moment. “You were wonderful, blueberry. Du warst perfekt.”

His eyes slide closed, and he passes out to the feel of Jester’s hands warm on his face.

[loomisjones]

Our Secrets Out

Summary(REQUEST):  

Pairing: FP X reader

Warnings: explicit sexual content, rushed sex, near physical assault (Chucks an ass,) cheating, FP AND CHERYL ARE ASSHOLES BUT THEYRE ACTUALLY MY FAV IRL IT JUST FIT THE STORY SO DONT TAKE OFFENCE BC THEY'RE MY BABIES, angst

Word count: 1943 A/N: i really dont know how i feel about this. like really, really dont know how i feel. i might make a part 2 just to redeem myself MAYBE. also the reader doesn't come out and splay her love to FP just because it felt kinda immature and unnecessary for the story but it kinda hints at feelings

Your back slid with ease against the off tinted blue bathroom stalls wall, the sweat pooling between the wall and your skin acting as an aid to move you with ease.

 FP sucked at your breast greedily, toying with the nipple as his hand around your waist was the only thing keeping you from falling to the dingy drive ins bathroom floor. That and his three fingers pumping knuckles deep in your pussy.

 You gasped and groaned, rocking against one another and his fingers pumped and your hands stroked the spance of his shaft, your moans mingling in with the cinematic scream outside, trying to get each other off as soon as possible.

 Before you had met FP, foreplay was one of your favourite things about sex. The adrenaline, the blood pumping through your ears as you explore someone’s body, your body getting hot as someone teased you with their mouth. But since meeting FP and diving into your after hour adventures, you hadn’t thought much about the act. Sure, you and FP had done some foreplay, a rough tug on the cock and quick oral, but it always was just that-quick. By the time you and FP found one another at the end of the day, you two were always looking to blow off steam in the quickest way possible; him buried deep in you, so you were happy to throw away any unnecessary hurdles.

 “Goddamit FP, enough,” you whine, stopping your rock on his fingers, “i’m ready.”

 He nods a bit, strands of hair coming out of his slicked back doo to waterfall over his forehead. He uses his hold on you to lift you up a bit, removing his fingers with a slick sound and an emptiness left in you, making you whimper and scratch at the hair at the nape of his neck.

 You brace your hands against his clothe cladded shoulders as he lowers you down on his throbbing beat red cock, his name falling from your lips though it’s quickly shushed with the sloppy press of his lips against yours, the taste of sweat and beer tingling against your lips.

 You tighten your knees against his hips, a groan falling simultaneously from both of you as he pushes you down on his cock, filling you, the feeling just as satisfyingly painful as it has had been since you started your sexcapade a few weeks ago.

 You shift your hips once his balls are pressed against your ass, your walls fluttering around his cock to pull a strangled “fuck” from the man.

 He uses his hold around your waist to drag you forward as he jerks his hips, the thrust needy and demanding, driving into you hard and fast, the sound of his balls slapping against your skin echoing in the room, loud enough to mask even the movie playing outside, the sound only a distant buzzing as FP moved his hips in a punishing rhythm, the sound of his panting the only other distinguishable sound keen to your ears.

 “Fuck, y/n, ‘m so close,” he grunted, his pelvis stuttering for a moment although he pulls himself back together to carry on his ruthless manner.

 His pelvic bone squashes against your clit as he pulls you forward once more, hit cock buried to the roof as he pulls you back down.

 Your own orgasm was sudden and hurried- one minute you were thinking about the drag of FPs cock against your walls and the next your own orgasm was screaming through your, your head tingling as it knocks against the wall, getting pulled down into euphoric bliss.

 FP brought a hand up to the back of your head as is laid against the wall, his thrusts frantic as he pulled your head up and his lips to yours, kissing you until your lungs started to burn, breathing becoming hard.

 Once he rocked through his own orgasm, sporadic thrusts as he pumped you full, he brought his finger down from your waist to your hip, tapping against the bare skin until you got the idea and hopped down, a feeling of pins rushing through your sexed out legs which you hadn’t noticed were asleep until you were left to stand on your own, wobbling a bit as you struggled to pull your pants on.

 You two shuffled around each other, pulling yourself back together quietly once you two got what you needed from one another, nothing more needing to be said past your sexual in devours.

 “I’ll call ya later,” he mumbled, straightening his jacket as he gave you one last over the shoulder glance as he pulled the stall door open, closing it behind him.

 You knew that call would come in a lust filled “come over” or a sporadic after 10 “are you up” and as you heard his boots grit against the gravel in the Twilight Drive-In’s parking lot, getting further from you, you tried your hardest to ignore the clenching of your heart.

 ~

 “Ya know what, Cheryl, let it go.” You hadn't wanted to come to Jughead’s “party” in the first place, let alone stand around and let Riverdales head bitch in charge rip everyone into shreds. Not that you didn't like Jughead, it was that you didn't like parties, especially those that were ran by Northsiders even if you had the same heritage in your blood. It just isn't your scene.

 What also isn't your scene is letting Cheryl humiliate Archie in front of the whole room just for the fact of who he sleeps with, something you knew all too well. So maybe it was the similarity and sympathy you felt for Archie or maybe it was the fact that for all of eighteen years, you had been watching Cheryl scrutinize everyone and you were sick of it, seeing that no one else was going to stand up to the fire Vixen.

 You push yourself off of the stairs railing that you had been leaning on, the path clearing to allow you to walk to the center of the room until you were face-to-face with the fuzzy jacket wearing redhead, Chuck heaving over your shoulder.

“I don't know how much the princess would like her family's, extracurriculars, blasted over town, so let it go.” Even though you grew up on the Northside with people who lived under the blanket of security and blindness to what really goes on under the maple trees of Riverdale, you knew otherwise. You saw things, things specifically pointing back to Clifford Blossom and his drug cartel he decided to pick up.

“Oh yes, y/n,” Cheryl twirls on her lifted heels to face you as you approached, her signature all too sweet smile spreading across her painted red lips as you crowd one anothers space, “dont think I don't know your sins either you middle class twit.”

You raise your eyebrows in an inviting manner, shaking your head a bit as you can't imagine the red lipstick wearing bee could have on you.

“”You and Mr.Dilf Daddy Jones,” her eyes shift to the corner of the room in which FP had been clustered in to, looking completely out of place in the whole situation.

He locks his jaw as his teeth grind, bunching his fists in his pockets to stop himself from stopping the high school girl and what she was about to spill to the whole room, but most importantly, Jughead whose interest was peaked at the mention of his already strained dad.

“How was the movie?” She giggles as if she's just told the world's funniest joke, leaning forward on her toes to push herself closer to your face, able to smell her mint toothpaste as she spit out, “that's right, you two were too busy sweating one out in the girls bathroom.”

She retracts once more, shrugging a bit as a tight lip smile returned to her face, “maybe use the family bathroom next time. Those doors lock.”

You contemplated letting it go, letting her tear you apart just like she did everyone else of Riverdale, but then you saw Jughead. The look of his pain and hurt, and betray fueled your power as you connected your palm to Cheryl’s blush covered cheek, making her double over as the sound of flesh against flesh echoed throughout the room, causing the room to fall silent; someone had stood up to Cheryl and that was something to make everyone shocked.

Cheryl rises back up, a hand over the place you had just connected to seconds ago. She had a look on her face that could kill as her gaze shifted to Chuck, words passin through her gaze.

You turn around to face Chuck only to catch a blur, leaning to the side out of reflex as you just miss the swing of Chuck’s right hook, wind against your cheek.

Everyone comes to the center of the room in a blop, FP the first to stand out as he put himself between you and the younger boy. Everyone followed like a swarm of nats after them, watching as P shooed Chuck away from the scene and then everyone else, announcing the end of the party. You tried to blend in with the cluster as you scrambled down the stairs, keeping your head low as you caught sight of a fumed Jughead huffing back into the house, moving in opposite directions as you managed to avoid being acknowledged by him.

“Are you alright?” You were sure you were going to manage to leave without confronting FP and the hurt you knew would come from the confrontation, but when his comforting, but huffed voice sounded behind you, you stopped in your tracks with your back staying to him.

You nod a bit until you turn around, facing the open mouth red in the face man, choking out a simple “thanks.”

You clear your throat, raising into a more confident tone as you shift on your weight, keeping your head titled low, “are you okay?”

He laughs a bit as he shakes his own head up and down, brining a hand up to thrust through his locks, “am i alright? Yeah, y/n, im alright besides the fact that my son, who already hated his old man as is, is cheating on his mom.” He stomps his foot on the ground, making you take a step back as you pull your bottom lip between your teeth. You knew the wife talk was going to come up at some point- he kept it on as he fucked you, for god sake.

“We can figure it out,” you manage to spit out before he interrupts you with wide eyes like you just told him the earth was flat,

“Figure it out? We? There's no we, y/n.” He shakes his head at you as if you were an ignorant child telling him the dumbest thing he'd ever heard.

You felt your heart break under your skin, jagged pieces splintering as your knees wobbled and your eyesight started to get blurry, your voice cracking as you spoke “Okay, FP.”

You stumbled back on feet that you didn't trust as they felt like jelly, stepping back from FP and the feelings you so desperately wanted to be reciprocated. FP had a slight twing in his face, looking like he wanted to reach out to you but instead he huffed and whipped his car keys in his hands, striding to his truck with fury, Your first tear falling as you turn on your feet to carry yourself the furthest you can get from FP, from Cheryl, from everything that ripped your world in half.

[bluebuckstallion]

kinda ramble-y fic below the cut, includes a metric fuck-ton of angst, macdennis, teen au, drinking, and a Lot of implied abuse/trauma

summary: macs a rebellious 14 year old tht hates the rich, dennis is a dick that really just needs an outlet to share his feelings, theyre sad together

ok no offense but i just...really love the concept of like, teen mac & charlie crashing house parties. them sneaking out of the house together and their late night adventures quickly becoming a blur of adrenaline and laughter as they jus show up at random parties someone down the street is throwing. they show up undetected at the peak of the utter chaos that is teen rebellion, take a shitload of booze, and then ditch just as fast. they go by the train tracks after and get wasted together, drowning out the deafening reality that is their parents dont care enough to notice theyre not at home every night & that life isnt going so well. and for once they can be happy in each others company and have a taste of a childhood they deserved, even if they can only find it at the bottom of a bottle

one night mac goes off by himself, probably because charlie just hasnt been as up to going out. mac has no clue why, the only things charlie’s been sputtering about between drinks every night is his ‘son of a bitch of an uncle’ who moved back in recently. mac doesnt understand and charlie wont give him what he needs to understand it. so mac gives it no second thought. he spots this absolutely huge house in the suburbs. hes never seen something with architecture like this and hell sure as hell never understand how someone can afford so much room, or what its even used for. the yard is donned with blacked out kids he knows from his classes, and the inside of the house is filled with the melody of drunk kids slurring and laughing to party songs.

he decides this is it-this is the one place hell allow himself to go without his best friend. and hell definitely save booze for him. and he wont allow himself to feel guilty for it, he never does anything for himself anyways. he strides in with a nonchalant facade and his best ‘yes-i-definitely-belong-here’ smile from cheek to cheek, waving at classmates that never noticed him before and definitely wont now. which is the only advantage that comes from being the rat, one of the sore losers in the bullshit hierarchy that is high school popularity. nobody will notice when youre taking something right infront of them.

he makes it to the kitchen and finally pieces together who lives here-its the piece of shit he has half his classes with, the word snob as a person, someone he cant help but loathe for his gross elitism. its dennis reynolds. some kid thats really full of himself, someone who helped trademark ‘the rat’ and laughs at mac while hes down. he didnt really mind, its not like he was bullying charlie, and he was strong enough to take the half-assed insults this guy threw at him. it wasnt a big deal.

but here, now-he found dennis in the midst of his own party, alone in the kitchen, half-empty bottle of tequila in tow, and what looked like mascara trailing from his eyes. what a pussy is what he was about to say, but something stopped him. dennis looked at the other boy looming over him and flinched, covering his face instantly. mac was confused, what the hell was he doing that for? when dennis realized he was fine, he instantly tried to revert back to his cool guy defense mode. something compelled mac to crouch down next to him because, well geez, the poor kid was a mess.. and he felt like it humanized him. the urge to steal his things for a taste of a life he never had slowly died down as he said hello to the gracious party host himself. “why-are-you-here”s  were spit out instantly, because dennis didn’t remember inviting some dirty street rat to his party. mac gave a really half-assed excuse, which was all he needed to convince dennis he was supposed to be here, considering all his thoughts were mush from how out of it he was-he never had the opportunity to drink this much on account of his sister beating him to it, or his mom emptying everything after heated arguments with his dad. and although it annoyed him when she was drunk, it was better than falling asleep to the melody of fighting and the threat of an impending divorce.

but anyways, now mac is lost in his eyes and they’re both half a bottle of tequila down, and he isnt sure if hes holding his hand or just dreaming it. and oh god, his eyes are so beautiful and his lips are coated with strawberry chapstick and he wants to kiss them so bad, he wants to keep holding his hand for all of eternity but at the same time he wants to hold his face in his hands and wow he wants to kiss him so bad and to taste the strawberry chapstick and god, hes infatuated. he wants to wipe his tears away and to kiss his rosy cheeks and run his hands through his hair, so bad. and it hits him that hes too deep, what would charlie think of this? falling for the enemy? fuck. but that doesnt matter because all that matters now is the fact hes really hand in hand with someone hes fallen in love with, and all it took was talk of trauma and a bottle of tequila.

theyre no longer on the kitchen floor as theyre giggling hand in hand stumbling up the stairs, leaning on each other and shushing one another as they laugh too hard to smile right and their cheeks are flush and they arent sure if its the drinking or their company. theyre trying to be quiet as they close the door to the twins’ room and dennis tries to lock it with a shaky hand. mac watches him in utter jaw-dropping awe, feeling butterflies fill his stomach and suffocating any insecurity hed ever felt before. this was new to him. but dennis felt it even stronger. hed spent so long building up a wall, hed spent so long listening to his mothers vodka-fueled lectures about never letting yourself fall in love. barbara made him promise hed never do that to himself, it hurt too much she told him. but now he was sitting on the top bunk of his bed with what seemed to be the boy of his dreams, he didnt know he could ever feel this way or honestly feel anything at all, and he was too drunk to feel guilty for it.

hours pass and now mac is laying on his bare chest. dennis has his hands intertwined in his hair and hes taken away by how soft it is when he strokes it. macs never felt a wave of clarity envelop him so softly before. hes at peace. all the droning hum of party music is drowned out. all he can hear is the soft rhythm of their hearts and their cautious breathing, both scared that this still might not be real. macs heart flutters when he realizes dennis’ breathing gets faster as he moves his hand across his chest, and he looks up with half-slit puppy dog eyes that dennis is absolutely in love with. mac opens his mouth to speak, but changes his mind. he doesnt wanna jinx it, hes so scared he wont be able to impress cool kid dennis reynolds, and he doesnt wanna do anything to change this moment. he plays it safe. as he snuggles closer, dennis holds him and macs face is the warmest its ever been, and he buries it in the other boys chest. he doesnt know how to react to this, hes never known how to react to anything but especially nothing like this. his face is even warmer than macs and hes trying so hard to not let him know that he likes him because thats something his mom would be ashamed of. mac falls asleep on his chest, and dennis cant stop playing with his hair.

dennis wakes him up because he knows everything would be ruined if anyone found them together, especially his sister. god knows what she would do. and dennis tries to tell him he should leave, but the words choke him too much to come out when he sees macs adorable face glance up at him. and hes just too shy to say a word.

the next thing they know, dennis pulls him closer and theyre both kissing for the first time, and mac feels wrong. he wants to push him away and he knows he should feel absolutely horrible, he knows god would be disappointed in something like this and hes terrified of the consequences hell get. but he pushes the thoughts away and succumbs to the warmth that surrounds his body. dennis is holding him so gently and neither want to ever move again, and something compels them to stay together. the kiss is only broken by dennis’ nervous laughter, and a smile that he cant hide. and when the boys recollect themselves they start kissing again. they never went further than that, partially because they couldnt get it up this drunk and partially because they were too scared to ruin it, but it was still nice to fall asleep side by side, even if they didnt mean to

mac wakes up to the soft golden smile of the suns rays against the bed, and he vaguely remembers last night. panic sets in like it never has before. hes never stayed somewhere else this late before. what if charlie’s looking for him. what if whoever hes with didnt lock the door and someone saw him. and then he remembers who hes with, and hes terrified. what the hell did he do? he feels tears of shame well up because he knows hes a sinner in gods eyes and hes made the biggest mistake of his life, and oh fuck when he tried to get out from under the covers he woke dennis up. he isnt even half as shocked as mac is, hes calm. hes happy. hes never woke up so peacefully before, and hes grinning. he tries to tell mac good morning but hes rambling under his breath about how wrong this is and hes going to hell, and dennis takes that as a sign he shouldve taken his mothers advice. hes utterly crushed.

mac doesnt even apologize as he leaves, he slips on his boots and gets out as soon as he can despite the wavering tone in dennis’ protests and pleads to stay. he forgets his jacket during the rush. he leaves dennis confused and more scared of opening up than hes ever been, and he doesnt know how to deal with his feelings anymore. mac tries to forget everything. he never tells charlie. he doesnt ever want to look dennis in the eyes again. he never wants to feel that way again, because he went from feeling on top of the world to being ashamed and thinking he knows its wrong. he doesnt tell anyone.

[kenmaiii]

stop being jealous and bitter!

Now i know you cant outright just throw away your jealousy in the art community. You see a really cool popular artist or just someone with absolutely amzing art and you think “wow holy shit their art is so good i wish that was me and that i could do that....” I understand that spite can be a good thing sometimes; it can be what motivates you to improve and do well, especially if the artist is well... not the best person in terms of personality. Great, that’s even more motivation to do well right!? 

But when does all the comparing go too far?

----------------------------------------long post incoming------------------------------------------

Now i’ve had people very close to me do this. I’ve been told that im ‘popular’ which im honestly not seriously. They could probably be reading this right now, but this has been bothering me for awhile so i must get this out there. Let’s step into a certain mindset for a moment:-

You hate your artwork. You hate your current skills. Sure there are artists you like. But then there are ‘THOSE’ ones. You have very specific artists you follow just because theyre so good and popular they make you feel bitter and you still check up on them regularly to fuel that bitterness. You know good and well that they make you bitter and angry and peeved but you just keep going back.

Step back for a moment and think.... why on earth am i fucking doing this???? Comparing and feeling bitter about another persons skill or popularity and letting yourself stay sad and bitter isn’t good for ANYTHING, art aside. It’s good to want to feel validated at the work you spent time on but it WILL get tiring if you keep complaining that ‘your art is bad’, ‘your art isnt good’, ‘its shit’ or ‘garbage’. Your brain is just internalizing that and hindering your work and future improvement. It’s most importantly WASTING YOUR own time, YOU the creator. And not to sound snobby here, i really truly dont intend for that, but some of you know good and well that you keep belitting you work because you only just want people to compliment your art when youre only doing the bare minimum to improve! I can only tell you as a friend or an on-looker that i love your art so many times (as much i really do love it and hope for your improvement) if you continuously decide to still turn around and say you hate your work and tell me im wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why reach for compliments then! Why continuously turn them down?

And i’m not saying you cant ever not like your art (cause it happens) or decline a compliment, but to do it every single time....it leaves a bad image for your work. You either start to believe it, or the person complimenting you will get put off from your negativity!  

It makes people feel bad, especially if theyre also artist AND also your friends. You can’t keep saying you prefer their work and still put down your own. It makes your artist friend uncomfortable. They might not know how to respond when you keep doing it. And im sure they wouldnt want you to keep making yourself feel bad. Personally, i wish all my art friends success and improvement, and i want them to love and feel proud of their work more than the times they hate it. We really need to uplift each other as artists.

Thanks.

What you think and say is what you become and if youre always negative and comparing youre gonna tear down both the person you admire and yourself. Ie, if youre constantly thinking ‘ill never be as good as this person’,’no ones ever gonna like my work’, ‘i cant color as well as they do’ or saying that your work is only ever garbage... newsflash asshole! your mind absorbs that negativity and makes you believe it! u fool!!!!! Because brains are stupid and can be your worst enemy at times! 

Sometimes you just need to stOP looking at certain peoples work completely if it gets you that bitter or angry or sad. Unfollow them! Block them! Delete their name from your search history if you have to! Stop hurting yourself and forget about them, it’s like trying to think about an ex thats moved on. Pointless.

Negative emotions such as sadness and anger are our brains direct ways at trying to reach out to ourselves.

You: seeing cool art Your mind: remembering you dont have some of those skills or popularity + comparing = sadness/ anger/ bitterness at not being able to be at that lvl withtin the same timeframe or less

Your brain is trying to tell you to fix this! But you know you might not have the tools to gain that much popularity or become so good at anatomy, coloring , compositions or backgrounds overnight, so the only solution for your brain is to self-sabotage.

It’s just the same as suddenly feeling sad for no reason. It’s your mind trying to work out a problem you never resolved. Maybe your friends haven’t replied in awhile and you feel ignored. Or you subconsciously remembered a bad experience without really realizing. You’ll get sad. Your mind is is saying ‘Hey asshole im sad. I know it might be out of your control but I’ll stay sad about this one thing until you resolve it somehow. ’ (whether it be blindly distracting yourself on purpose or fully wallowing in the feelings)

So we realized youre feeling intensely about this persons work vs your own...then what exactly happened there? The answer is pretty simple. Some kind of information processing happened in your brain. The result of this processing made the your mind conclude that one of your existing problems (art in this case) can never be solved; whether conscious or unconscious, and this explains why your mood might change all of a sudden without any kind of warning signs (in relation to what you saw). 

Inspired VS Jealousy When youre inspired youre working against yourself in a GOOD way. You’re feeling motivated to make something great! Youre feeling motivated to make something better than the last piece!! And honestly thats wonderful!!!  That is a lot nicer than being in art-block, comparison negativity hell.

YOU are the only one responsible for where you are as an artist. That goes towards every artist of every skill level! There’s always someone better than you and there’s always someone worse than you. People get better at art in different intervals depending on how much they take in or put into practicing. Some people just get some concepts and fundamentals a lot easier and quicker than others but that doesn’t mean they naturally had that ability from birth. They put in the work just as you should be doing instead of feeling so intensely negative! But when you’re jealous and negative all the time, that’s when it starts to go downhill. :/

Jealously is a very human emotion at its core. And im not saying its super easy to deal with and just suddenly get over, but there are things you can do to slowly help yourself do it at least a little less.

Here’s the best things you CAN do instead:- - Write down some of the things you find yourself feeling bitter over about, especially when you look at another artists work? Ask yourself why these specific things? If it’s something you yourself can work on in your own pieces then maybe uh do that?  - Find the time to practice your work. - Practice even more. - If it’s your style that you arent happy with think of the artstyles you like and set aside time to mimic the way that artist might draw something (hence adding that to YOUR style). Take a sketchbook page or two and just draw entirely in those styles. - Practice. I can’t stress this enough. I know artists say this a lot and it can kind of just be thrown around carelessly, but if you keep putting this off and saying you don’t want to practice or talking about how time is going by when you should be practicing things.... and STILL refuse to practice then???? I cant help you sorry. Time waits for no one, so sometimes you need to grab time by the horns and kick its ass for awhile. Put in that effort! - Please use references. Even better if you use it nearly EVERYTIME you draw something, especially yknow...if its a pose, body part or background that you know you have no idea how to properly express! Find a stock image or a variety of websites to use! Save poses that you like from online magazines, other artists and photographs you see anywhere online. I like to look at online magazines from other countries or photographers, and there are tons of places like pinterest or instagram and whatnot. - Stop comparing and being bitter. Ii cant say this enough it gets me so ticked off, but my stubborn taurus self refuses to fully go off until it all piles up and this post is the result lol. If you know you can’t let go hating on a certain artist (for no good reason) then dont hate-follow them! Don’t check up on their work constantly! Don’t even talk about them!!!!!!! Try to get them out of your head for goodness sakes. Majority of the time they dont even know who YOU are so why are you worried about what they’re up to. - STOP SHITTING ON YOUR OWN WORK. - STOP IT RIGHT NOW. - AS THE ARTIST SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO FORCE YOURSELF TO SAY ‘’hey, my work isn’t exactly where i want it to be at this point in time and it may never be but i can appreciate that i’ve gotten better at a lot of things and im better than where i was a few years/ a year/ a month ago/ even weeks ago.” - ”I’m proud of this piece and can’t wait to get even better.” - Art is a struggle that takes time, effort and a lot of work. There’s always going to be someone better than you and there’s always going to be someone worse than you. You can only strive to get to the level that would make you happiest, otherwise you will get irritated with it and feel absolutely miserable about everything you produce. - PUT IN THE WORK TO GET YOUR ART OUT THERE. Social media has been both a curse and a blessing to artists all around. It’s made it easier for us to share our work around and opened paths for making money online and at home and connecting with other artists, but competition grows everyday as more people post their work in the same market. (ie another reason why it can be hard to get your commissions out there) Also as artists we want that dopamine rush you get from people liking your stuff, i get that its gucci. -But if you aren’t tagging your works well, posting somewhat consistently, not really bothering to talk to people in certain art communities (even people in your fandom because hey potential friends and even partners on future projects), not adding your works to groups (a big problem i see with people on places like deviantart mostly), joining and sharing them in art group chats/aminos/discords, joining events to get yourself out there (such as zines/big bangs/gift exchanges etc), giving tips and advice or even little helpful tutorials to people then how do you expect to be noticed? How.  If youre not doing at least TWO of these things then hoW can you complain about not getting attention. :(

 Of course you dont have to do ALL of this. Im just saying ...if you arent out there advertising how will more people know about you? This leads to you thinking no one likes your art (skill level excluded because even my cringiest old art would have a few comments or encouragements to see my future improvement, and i still want to hide when people like/comment/reblog said old art to this very day). 

I understand mainly OC artists feel this way that no ones gonna like their characters, or it just doesnt get reblogged enough in general but thats understandable too. No one is ‘selling out’ if they only do fanart. No one is ‘snobby or scared to get themselves out there’ if theyre really enthusiastic about their stories and worlds. Otherwise we wouldnt have fandoms int he first place, theyre all someones work. And hell, good for you if you draw both. It really is just a matter of how you put yourself out there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’ll take some time but there IS always someone out there that likes your stuff. And sometimes you just have to be content with making work for yourself, work that makes you happy. The online art world is tough especially when youre small but once you fall into the depths of bitterness its hard to rewire your mind...

This is how yall should be looking at your/others work majority of the time: You: seeing cool art  Your mind: omg thats beautiful! i wish i could draw and paint like that. i should practice more , try out some poses and anatomy or implement what they do into my work. i wanna make a cool ass piece like this too i feel so pumped to draw and work!! 

And that’s that! Do yourself a favor and be happier you bastards! Its tiring being negative and sad all the time and i want tf out of it. Its so very tiring and annoying to be sad and bitter as shit!!!!! My goD

I can’t really think of anything else to add to this and the text may appear angry sometimes as i was very heated when i wrote this but tried to tone it down a lot hfkds. Im not some ‘art guru goddess with supreme skill uwuw’ but advice is advice! It’s always up to the person listening to take it or not.

I’m gonna end this with one of my favorite art quotes of all time from t h e Arin Hanson himself. Because it really is true. 

Get yourself out there, practice towards a level that makes you content and try to have more fun with loving your work.

It’s taken me a long while to post this, as i’ve been feeling this way for...at least a couple months??? but i finally put it all out there i just needed to do this lol.  Sorry if i mightve repeated info sometimes here and there?

This post is just as much of a call out to my own actions but more so @ those of you that specifically do this! 

[rawring-rainbows]

The Queen’s pajamas

She was woken up by her potential girlfriendand her story is still being worked on if you wanna read the notes and rough draft so far here you are

Our Queen found a living island fixed it up and discovered it travelled different  dimensions and worlds

Queen Eclipse her two orbs floating above her shoulders holds back her true  (as corny as it sounds).. form

Her body and soul is directly connected to the living island when those little marbles fall she forms into this huge beast lays

behind her castle/Huge body of water (I cant decide) She goes to sleep and also so does the island No one knows for sure

what happends during this time besides her royal higher ups During this time its dark and most of the creatures plants etc seem to be put at rest things are dim dark and calm and

normally people can leave the island but no one can it looks almost as if theres a barrier around it During this time the entire kingdom starts this gigantic festival they play games they eat food they meditate they do

mminor rituals but this most import thing is laying your dominant hand on the royal beast and the other on your heart and

telling her that you believe in her and thank her for all that she's done as well as a what you hope for when the sun comes

up again Her form gets smaller and smaller as time goes on but when she wakes up shes happy and rejuvinated like her people who

canot help be filled with an explosive amount of happieness but so does the entire continent harvests are plentiful and

delicious flowers bloom trees are full of fruit the hopeless have hope the sick are healed all sorts of miracles happen

except one the dead cannot be raised and the wicked use this strange phenomenon for one thing.. To Kill without regret

You finally earned your way to the top of the royal hierarchy to get some sort of answer is to what the Queen does while

she sleeps a tall wise looking creature looks down at you with his hands behind his back an expression and peircing eyes

that gave you this feeling he could read u like a book."What would you do if you were a God?" He gives you no time to

answer "One God of many who takes over a world and play with those puppet strings as you please and make your ideal

world..Would you abandon it? Would you get bored? With endless time and power what do you do with this immortal life?" He

finally answers a question "You become atleast a quarter mortal..Taking on the life among your people but! Is it enough?

NO!!" The sudden outburst startles you but he keeps a calm expression "Do you take a small part of an enormous world and

make it your own? What kind of God would make one's self slightly vulnurable  while taking the lives from countless God

Ruling worlds of your very own kind? Is this God planning to make a Utopia for many?......Or To grow strong enough to wage

war and flip that coin calling heads to who will be the ruler of ALL worlds?...And will you be strong enough to live

through to thank the one who ripped off a peice of herself to show you how lucky you are to stand on the grounds of someone

who could erase u from existance with the flick of her wrist..Will you be thankful to the one who allowed you to be a part

of the game that no matter what you do you cannot stop..or will you realize All you can do is attempt to give her the heart

to try her damnest to allow you to survive in an existence where others like herself wont have a smidgen of pity for you?..

"

"You ever hear the term a captain goes down with their ship?" The Queen asks looking up at the stars. You Nod. "You see

those stars up there?.....They're sunken ships... God's are not made of flesh of blood..They're pure energy and each one of

them swimming around up there looks for...hmm...how do i put this...They look for shelter and they feed on energy and when

a God First manifests they're very fragile..and easily consumed its a battle to live on untill they find theyre set

home..Some are stronger then others and build their hearts in several worlds some have dozens some settle with one" her

eyes darted up with a look of pain on her face. "Some dont make it..Their people they work so hard to grow and have their

planet thrive..either destory eachother or destroy their God..If a God dies in their shell its people could thrive for some

time but then..." she pointed to one of the brightest stars in the sky that was soon shut off like a light. "Theyre used to

fuel the next world" You asked which one is she like. She grinned eared to ear. "Im a special kind...the kind that doesnt

like to be tied down..The kind that's deeply afraid not only to lose my own life but the ones who grew with me and

Thrived!" She took a deep excited breath then sighed.  "Though I took a big risk being different from the others..I have no

idea what's in our future..but!..I will work hard enough so that we have a big chance for it to work out in the end..Most

God's abandon their children..Most God's just watch them grow thrive and destroy eachother while sitting back without a

care because they only think about themselves...Me...I want to work together.." She lifted her glass of wine. "If the plan

works smoothly we'll be unstoppable if not well.." She clinked her glass against yours and lifted hers up again. "To an

unexpected future!!"

"When do you feel the most mortal?" You asked the queen who was scratching her chin in thought. "I...How do I put

this...Any sort of pain...emotional,physical,etc I do not feel immidiatly..I feel just enough to settle the situation at

that moment..whether its comfrontation..or a fight i feel about 5 to 25 percent of any sort of negative feeling...untill

later..when theres no one around..when theres no danger my people cant handle..I break down..I cry..my chest hurts..my

heart breaks..I throwup and so on and so fourth...for centuries i would wonder why this happend...then i realized..I use my

immortality as a shield and dont give my mortality a chance to breath..its something ive been trying to work on for a long

time..others who ive told this secret to said they've felt something similiar to that..that its because we hurt for others

and put everything holding us back aside for those including ourselves.. Who are we if we do not protect others while

they're weak as our parents who have provided us with shelter while we were young?.. We're all still young you know...Young

and afraid Unsure of our futures no matter how hard we work for them..Life is tough and brutal as Hell and its nice to have

someone to protect you when you need it most..I dont mind having these moments..Pain isnt so bad when it reminds you that

you're alive.."

God's are very territorial shes nervous Oh my Stars!..Look she's sweating!" You say as you watched her talked to the group

of Gods. "She's fine she's smart but very cautious these are her friends-"  You interupt him. "Ticking time bombs you mean!

any one of them can turn around and attempt to kill her or kill someone else-" "She wouldnt allow that! She would rather

lay down her life then allow them to put us in danger..." You look to the side with uncertainty "What is one life to a God

thats rules over many?" You sighed and clutched your chest trying to still your racing heart.

When two Gods fight it's...Ugh! I'm a journalist! Im risking my life on the surface and i dont even know how to explain this!"  Adrenaline pumped through your veins you were panicking there was two  gargantuan God's standing thousands of feet from you ready to Rip into eachother. "What to do What to do" You say quickly pacing back and fourth Suddenly CRACK BOOM! Heat rushes over you as you fall and eat dirt you look up over the stone you stood behind leaning over and watching it slowly start to disintegrate, but that didnt matter just yet you're writers block was destroyed at this very moment and you had to write this down "Through Mortal eyes this fight looked as if two Colossal flames were trying to engulf eachother-" You start to say but just like that it was almost over the enemy was tossed in your direction as you watched in shock it skid across the ground and stopped 10 feet from you The Goddess who ruled over the ground you stood on seemed to appear on top it then immidiatly looked right into your eyes. "She stared at me..Its like looking into one thousand suns though it doesnt burn.." You say out loud attempting to write it down without looking The monumental beings expression started to change. "Her expression went from pure fury that melted into absolute worry..You look tired.." You said softly it was like talking to an intelligent beast who said nothing but you could tell how it was feeling. The deity suddenly started using her last bit of strength on her enemy pressing her enormous forearm on its throat struggling against her grip. "Stop! Don't worry about me! Fight this guy with a better strategy! You could die!" You braced for impact There was a loud crack and a deafening sound of thunder you soon after looked up. "The Enemy was destroyed in an explosion of pure white..It's snowing diamonds..She's ok..She won....Risking her life for one weak being who stood on her grounds which she ruled....and im in love with her"

[doye1-blog]

Giving Your Hands a Beauty Makeover

Giving Your Hands a Beauty Makeover

One of the first ways aging rears its ugly head is on our face and our hands. Some women begin showing extreme signs of aging on their hands, even in their youth. Theres a trend thats helping bring awareness to the need to care for your hand health early on selfies! Engagement ring selfies have become quite popular lately. Everyone from the girl next door to famous celebrities are getting in on this trend. From Instagram to Pinterest, these photos of a womans hand showing off her engagement ring are popping up everywhere. Magazines are doing their part to help keep these selfies popular by offering articles that cover how to hold the hand to which type of lighting is best. Youll see tons of tips on choosing a nail color for an engagement selfie to how to make your hands look smooth and clear even as dramatic as letting the blood drain out of your hands by raising them high in the air before lowering them and quickly taking the photo. Some future brides are even having hand lift surgery to get rid of wrinkles and prominent veins! And its not just engagement ring selfies making us self-conscious about the wear and tear of our hands. Anytime we take notice of our hands while holding a glass, for instance, it can cause alarm when you see wrinkles and discoloration. There are ways to take care of your hands and keep them looking youthful without resorting to surgery.

The Link Between Nutrition and Hand Beauty

If youre wanting to give your hands a beauty makeover without resorting to surgery or expensive treatments, you need to start by changing what impacts your skin from the inside out. The first thing that youll want to take a look at is the way that you eat. Nutrition affects every part of your body, but especially your hands. More than any other are of your body thats covered by skin, your hands deal with the most irritants and are exposed to more things that can harm the skin. So you have to make sure that they have the nutrients that they need to repair the skin. You also need to make sure that theyre well protected from toxins. Taking care of your hands by making sure your body has the right nutrients can give your skin a long lasting youthful appearance. A healthy diet is instrumental in keeping the skin soft and glowing, but there are specific foods that are designed to offer beneficial boosts to the hands. These foods can be enjoyed as part of a meal plan and some of them can be used as topical applications, so that the skin on your hands can directly absorb the nutrients. One of the issues with hand beauty is that because your hands are exposed to so much, the natural oils in the skin can easily become dried out. When the oils in the skin are depleted, you end up with dry skin that makes your hands look older than they actually are. Plus, dry skin can make your hands look patchy if you dont treat it properly. Youll want to start by adding plenty of avocados to your diet. This food is natures way of making sure you have great looking hands. Thats because avocados are loaded with biotin, an ingredient thats specifically known to ward off dry skin. You can add this food to your diet to get the benefit of the vitamins internally to help your skin, but you can mash up avocados and make a hand mask to help heal any problem areas you might have on your hands with dry skin or brittle nails. The vitamins and minerals soothe the skin and help your hands feel soft and look younger. Eggs are another food youll want to have in your diet. They contain biotin, plus, eggs also contain ingredients that are known to keep skin safe from dangerous changes caused by sun or other damaging elements. Because all of the benefits of green tea are touted practically everywhere, you might have seen some information on how helpful this tea can be for the body. But what you might not know is that green tea is helpful for rejuvenating skin. The tea contains micronutrients, which help fight disease and protect the skin. Your hands undergo damage simply from day to day use, so you want a food that helps keep that damage at bay. There is wonderful food that can help to prevent damage, including damage from the sun and that food is tomatoes. Not only do they contain lycopene, which helps lower cancer risk, but they contain nutrients that help tighten the skin. Of course, an ounce of prevention goes a long way - and you want to do all that you can to keep the skin looking soft. Its always best to go on the offensive rather than defensive. For that reason, make sure that you have plenty of salmon in your diet. The compound carotenoid in salmon promotes skin restoration so that skin can return to the softness and the smoothness that it once had. Collagen is what helps your skin look smooth. Its a protein instrumental in keeping the tissues connected. Its basically the glue of the body and when it weakens, especially on the skin, youll notice looser skin and more wrinkles. Thankfully, nature provides a collagen stimulating food that you can eat to help improve the elasticity of your skin. This food is pomegranates and it can be ingested orally or applied topically to the skin as a mask. When you apply pomegranate directly to the skin, it can alleviate dry skin and heal troubled areas. If youre looking to dial back the age of your skin, youll need to have some nuts. Nuts are a good source of Omega 3 fatty acids. Walnuts are high in Omega 3 and incorporating these into your daily diet can bring back the soft, supple skin you want to have restored. You might think of beans as simply offering plenty of protein when you eat them. Its true that beans are loaded with protein, but theyre also loaded with the capability to repair damaged skin because the consumption of beans is helpful in the creation of amino acids. Amino acids are what the body uses to fix areas of the body, including on the skin, that have undergone any kind of damage. Plus, eating beans boosts the production of collagen. Its important that you eat natural, skin healing and collagen boosting foods from your youth on up to keep your skin looking healthy or to restore it.

Your Skin Is Thirsty - Why Hydration Matters

You might have been told that your body needs to have between 6-8 glasses of 8 ounce water every day. This advice is true because without enough water, the bodys functions are impaired. Keeping your body hydrated helps it get rid of waste. It helps your body be able to turn the food you eat into fuel and it even aids in the way your blood circulates through every part of your body. But as good as water is for your overall body health, its also extremely important for your skin. When you make sure that you get enough water intake, your skin has a healthier glow. It also reduces the look of aging. Your skin is the bodys largest organ and many people dont realize that like other organs that are within the body, skin can be damaged by not enough water intake. Thats because it uses water to perform all of its functions, including repair. A lack of hydration impedes the repair process. When this repair process is hampered, you end up with skin that has dry patches. When your skin has a lack of hydration, it will show up as wrinkles, sometimes aging you twenty years or more in an instant. The less hydrated you are, the more wrinkles youll end up developing. Most people dont realize that your body uses up the water you give it. This water is used up for a variety of reasons. Its easy to assume that if you go the gym and get in a hard workout, that you need to rehydrate the body. Plenty of people will take care to replenish lost fluids after they work out. But going to the gym isnt the only way your body loses water that affects your skin. If you walk out in the sun, even if youre only out a few minutes, you lose water. If you exert any kind of effort around your house or around the office or even out doing fun activities that dont seem strenuous, youre still losing water. And heres what happens when you do stop to take in water. Because the body is made with a built in survival mechanism, when it needs hydration, any water that you do give it will be funneled directly to the internal organs needed to keep you alive. And if you dont drink enough to give your organs what they need, guess where they take the moisture from? Your skin, including your hands. The body will actually remove what moisture your skin does contain and reroute it to your organs. This means that when it comes to getting hydrated, if youre not doing enough, your skin is last in line. So when you replenish, if you dont give your body all that it needs for the other organs, your skin doesnt get any at all. That means that your hands end up looking dry, flaky, wrinkled and older than they normally would. When you drink enough water, the skin on your hands is softer and younger looking. Plus, it fights wrinkles and other signs of aging. Youll want to make sure that your skin is hydrated on the inside as well as on the outside.

The Moisture Your Hands Need

Besides drinking enough water, youll want to make sure that your hands are getting the moisture they need from the outside as well. Its a common mistake to think that the hands need to be moisturized once a day to help make them stay soft and young looking. The truth is that hands have to be moisturized repeatedly throughout your day. Thats because of all the things your hands come in contact with that can damage the skin. A moisturizer not only restores the skin, but can also act as a barrier. Most people apply moisturizer after a bath - and you should do that because when you bathe, youre removing the oils from your skin that help keep it hydrated. Whenever your hands come in contact with water, theres potential for oil loss, and for the skin to become red, irritated, dry and develop other unsightly problems. You want to avoid things that cause the skin on your hands to dry out. This means making sure that you dont wash your hands too often (meaning more than is necessary). It also means that you dont use hand cleansers that contain alcohol. Hand cleansers that contain alcohol can damage your skin because alcohol dries out the oils. Liquid hand soaps are some of the worst culprits at causing the hands to dry out if they contain alcohol. Even if its not listed on the ingredients, it can still contain alcohol if it has fragrances. To be on the safe side, if you wash your hands using liquid soap, then youll want to buy products that are clearly labeled as alcohol and fragrance free. If you hand wash any dishes, youll also want to make sure that your dish soap is alcohol and fragrance free. Any type of cleaner or abrasive product can make your hands look dry, appear red and chapped and lead to damage - including wrinkles. So always wear gloves when your hands are going to be exposed to any products like that. Since water strips the hands of its natural oils, whenever they come in contact with water, apply moisturizer right afterward. This might have you reapplying the lotion several times a day, but it will protect your skin as well as having the potential to restore any damage. Dont use cheap moisturizes that contain ingredients that can do more harm than good. Look for creams that contain retinol or antioxidants or Vitamin C. All of these ingredients are helpful at protecting and restoring the skin on your hands.

Why Your Hands Need Sun Protection

Sun damage can really do a number on how your hands look. Exposure to the sun is one of the major reasons you can develop sun spots on your hands. Its also the reason that you can develop wrinkles on the hands as well as on other areas of the body. When you spend time in the sun, the ultraviolet rays go to work breaking down the elasticity of the skin on the backs of your hands. This breaking down is a result of the fibers being damaged. Once these fibers are damaged, youll notice that the skin on your hands looked saggy and wrinkled. You can have both shallow and deep wrinkles as a result of sun damage. You can also develop freckles as well as a change in the overall evenness of your skin tone. Your skin can take on a yellow appearance as a result of the sun damage. As the collagen tissue in the hands is exposed to the sun, the collagen breakdown will continue. Because the body is built for survival against sun damage, it goes to work trying to darken the pigmentation of your skin. This is why the skin on your hands will tan when exposed to the sun. Its your bodys way of trying to hold on to the collagen as well as the hydration. Its not just being at the beach that can cause sun damage to your hands. You can get it from being out in the yard, from taking a walk and even while driving your car. Anywhere that you are, if your hands are going to be exposed to the suns rays for fifteen minutes, then you need to apply sunscreen. You need one with mineral zinc oxide that has an SPF of at least 30. There are therapies that can restore the vitality to sun damaged hands. Some of these therapies can be invasive and painful. Most of them are expensive and time consuming. Your best bet to protecting your hands from sun damage is always prevention. Take good care of your hand health as you would your face, even if youre still young. You can find many hand-specific beauty products that are meant to help your body repair the damage thats been done to it during the day, such as rehydrating it and protecting it from toxins and damaging sun rays. If you do have a selfie event coming up, like engagement ring pictures, then you can do as many preventative measures as possible, and use concealers for things like unsightly veins, if necessary.