#like they're the only ones that understand the leader burden

[tabl3]

Skylar and Chase are one of my favorite friendships

[darksvster]

okay i was asked to post this on tumblr since i posted a mini essay about it on twitter so here it is, i added some more examples and elaborated on my points that i couldn't over twitter.

so, when i first watched episode 207 i thought it was weird how religious rhaenyra was, until ryan condal mentioned the cult imagery. now i think instead of the show making her paranoid and neurotic in the final arc, they're going to make her more of a cult leader figure.

i think rather than leaning into her paranoia and the idea of a "hysterical paranoid mother" after she loses her sons, they're going to have her drink her own kool-aid more and more. it's interesting that this is what emma and ryan discuss in this scene with the dragonseeds in the inside the episode.

i think it's interesting that instead of the show positioning her like "a leader amongst the smallfolk," this episode positions her in a darker light, like someone who is manipulating the people there for her own goals. and when vermithor turns on the bastards, she doesn't let them run, the guards keep them barricaded in.

she is literally enraptured by the fire in these scenes. now that she knows it's possible for others to claim the dragons, she has been vindicated and wants more. this is not a merciful queen who is reaching out a hand to the smallfolk, she's throwing stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks. after all, these are just smallfolk. bastards with no honor. ryan literally describes the scene as a ritual sacrifice.

and who do you conduct sacrifice for? the gods. but in this case, the gods the seven or the old gods, they aren't even just dragons, but the fact that rhaenyra sees herself in the dragons. she says as much in the literal pilot of the episode when viserys asks her what she sees when she looks at the dragons. she understands the power they wield.

she knows that their power lies in the dragons. but she doesn't reflect viserys' belief that they are a power that man never shouldn't have trifled with. she leans into the chaos and fire and blood of the dragons, we see that in the sowing, clearly.

rhaenyra inherited the worst of both viserys and daemon and that will lead to her madness. she's got viserys' strong belief in prophecy (one now exacerbated by her desperation).

we see that faith in the prophecy falter but never truly fade. rhaenyra has always taken is seriously, to the point that everything she's done this season is in response to the prophecy. her pacifism isn't just due to avoiding bloodshed. she makes it clear to jace that before plunging the realm into war she had to know there was no other option because of the burden of the prophecy.

even though daemon has never believed in prophecy or superstition. she's also got daemon's desire and lust for power and strength (something she confessed wanting specifically because daemon is a man when she was speaking to mysaria).

it's a great deconstruction of the chosen one archetype to have her drink this koolaid and believe herself the chosen one only to have that belief corrupt her. emma d'arcy speaks on this in their interview with gq when discussing rhaenyra's growing fanaticism.

I think something that has been happening for Rhaenyra throughout the series is a growing religious fanaticism. After her father’s death, there is this desire to be connected to him in some way. And losing him happens at the same moment as having her throne usurped. And so that thing that would have been such a direct connection to him is also stolen. So in lieu of that, there’s that searching [through] the histories. I think imagining that at some point her name will feature next to her father’s is in some way comforting, and I find it very moving to see a person who in grief has committed themselves to the history books. As the series goes on, I think we see her more and more invested in her faith. She returns to the old gods. I think all of these actions are in search of her right; the thing that she thought she had received from her father, she is looking for evidence again and again. And part of it, I’m sure, is a choice. I think sometimes in times of loss, we can choose the anchors that we are going to cling to, and her faith becomes one. But I think there’s a narcissism in it. I think her connection with her religion is about wanting to reinforce a divine right. And I think, looking at [episode] seven when this miracle takes place, and this man claims Seasmoke, I think she feels that it’s a gift from the gods. I think it’s what allows her to ride roughshod over Jace’s very legitimate concerns about his own status. I think it’s what allows her to stage a massacre, essentially. She feels that she is riding on the wings of her faith. But her faith, and her belief that she is the ruler that is supposed to sit on that throne, are completely enmeshed.

They continue:

What is going through Rhaenyra’s mind as she watches the Targaryen bastards be devoured and torched alive? I think she feels like a god. I think she feels super proud. I mean, I think it’s uncomfortable. I think there’s something, actually, also that ties into the religiosity — even being back in proximity to dragons, to that fire, is to somehow be living her birthright. To be soaking up the divine, somehow. And do you think that she feels as though the decision to essentially stage a massacre, as you say, is vindicated when the two new bastard dragonriders are found? Totally. Without a shadow of a doubt. I mean, it’s horrendous, but I think she is now this sort of emboldened fanatic, [and] I think she’s experiencing events within a far bigger timeline. She’s imagining the history books. And you know, what’s happening right in front of her is awful. But in 300-400 years, what will be documented is possibly a very short war; a huge civil war that was averted, that this was the first ruling queen, that this ruling Targaryen queen expanded the Targaryen’s ability to have dragons within their armoury.

emma's read on this supports what we see on screen when it comes to rhaenyra's newly found zealousness. the religious aspect could lead her to do things that might have been seen as atrocities by her. it could lead to mysaria abandoning her, her riders turning on her, and we would see more of that targ madness.

gods are mentioned several times in 207. first by addam, who says that the gods are calling him to greater things. rhaenyra has never been the extremely religious sort but, in this scene, she looks like she's had a moment of clarity.

importantly, rhaenyra doesn't know who addam's father is, or hugh's or ulf's. this is simply the first time in history that a non-targaryen (at least in her eyes) has claimed dragons. it's something that she believed impossible. it can feel like destiny to the desperate and she's been extremely desperate after losing daemon, rhaenys, and continuous loss after loss with no hope of recourse.

mysaria says that rhaenyra is lucky addam chose to bend the knee to her rather than himself. and her reply is that it is ordained. this religious vocabulary being used is intentional!

her complaint against the lowborn is that there is an ancient fealty from highborn houses. she essentially implies that bastards do not have honor. mysaria corrects her by pointing out that her legitimate half-brothers aegon and aemond aren't exactly delights, but that doesn't make rhaenyra see the light. instead she recognizes that there's fealty to be had from lowborn people too. the order of things have changed, as mysaria says, so she realizes that she can lift up people who have been historically stepped on and give power to the powerless, calling them her army of bastards.

but when jace calls this out, predicting that someone (perhaps hugh?) could lay claim to her throne if she legitimizes these bastards if not by name then by offering them the power of gods. obviously, jace's concern is real, his entire legitimacy lies on both viserys' past support and also the fact that he has a dragon of his own. if any bastard can claim one, what does that make him? but rhaenyra's response isn't logical. she believes that the throne is part of her and her son's destiny. their right.

for years, on some level, rhaenyra has believed that even though people have insulted her sons, they are full-blooded targaryens. she says herself that if she was a man she could father a dozen bastards, and as heir, she gives birth to three without hesitation. these aren't strongs or velaryons to her, her sons are targaryens.

but even when jace essentially begs his mother not to give commoners dragons, bringing up her past sins and pointing out his own struggle knowing that he's harwin strong's son, her response is somewhat cold. she says now that the gods have laid this in front of her and she has no choice.

the dragonkeepers call what she's doing blasphemy and note that it isn't the gods who brought the dragonseeds to her, but she herself has done that.

Dragonkeeper Elder: This is an abomination. You sent an Andal before a dragon. The judgment was delivered. Now you would send more. Rhaenyra: Ser Steffon Darklyn was the blood of the dragon. Dragonkeeper Elder: It was a blasphemy. He was no dragonlord. Neither are these. Rhaenyra: And yet the gods have set them before us. Dragonkeeper Elder: You have set them before yourself! The dragons are sacred; they are the last magic of Old Valyria in this sad world. They are not pieces on a board for the games of men. Our order will take no part in this.

to the dragonkeepers, she's using these bastards and dragons like chess pieces in her war. but to rhaenyra, who has seen addam claim seasmoke, it seems like this is a divine right — a sign from the gods. and that's proven again when hugh claims vermithor.

addam claiming seasmoke changed everything for her. she talks about claiming a dragon as a transformation, and, in many ways, this claiming has transformed her as well. she tells the dragonseeds that their purpose now is the end the hardships of war.

she paints a lovely image promising them peace at the end, but it is a wholly false image. with vermithor and silverwing now in her arsenal, there will be more suffering, more bloodshed. there are no promises of peace now that the war has been given to the dragons, not until everyone is dead. and if that happens, well, the gods willed it, not her.

in this moment, when she says "may the gods bless you" i have to wonder, is she talking about the seven? or the valyrian gods? or the dragons? i don't think she's fully in deep, but i can see the set up for a much darker storyline for rhaenyra rather than the book plot. every time her beliefs are proven or something impossible happens, that could reinforce her zealousness.

i have always said that rhaenyra is a combination of viserys and daemon, and i think that still. i think that she has both of their madnesses within her. as she loses more, the only thing she'll have to hold onto is that prophecy and the divine right she believes in now.

even this scene from the finale promo has over-the-top messiah, chosen apostles, last supper vibes. her saying "i have entrusted you with a power only few have known" as if she wasn't desperate for them and had no say in who the dragons chose. i love it!

honestly i'm totally here for it, i think it's an exciting direction to take. i don't think rhaenyra was always like this, she might have had the proclivity for it growing up under viserys' wing, but it's the war that's pushed her to this point. desperate people will turn to things like faith in order to guide them when the real world disappoints. i think it's a far more nuanced look at a sort of "madness".

and i'm here for the conflict that will happen with daemon as a result. i think daemon will be in direct opposition to this. he's NOT the type to follow cult leaders. this will be their conflict on top of the existing power struggles. this, to me, is far more interesting of a struggle as opposed to nettles causing romantic tension. this show has a tendency to lean away from harmful stereotypes about women. pitting woman against woman is one of them, as is the hysterical woman.

daemon dying for her could be a form of devotion, or perhaps even a command from a delusional rhaenyra who believes he will survive it. daemon could end up drinking the kool-aid too after the devastations of the war or simply realize that this is the last thing he can offer to someone who is too far gone to be saved.

THIS IS THE FIRE I WANT FOR RHAENYRA. this is the mad queen setup that we could have had! targ exceptionalism and completely going off the deep end as a way of coping with an unwinnable conflict. without viserys, without rhaenys, no one is there to temper the fire within her.

[beanghostprincess]

I am obsessed with Nirei and Sakura's dynamic because, from the very beginning, their characters start to develop around each other. Whether it's in a shipping way or not, their characters as we know them now wouldn't exist without the other. They're both each other's guiding lights.

Like.

Quite literally:

Nirei makes it his life purpose to help Sakura reach the top because he has been the first one to believe in him and help him out without making him feel weak. And not only that, but Nirei instantly knows Sakura has a good heart. Which is not a hard thing to do because this guy's emotions are displayed in plain sight (as much as he tries to hide it), but Nirei doesn't only realize Sakura's a good person, he also believes he needs help. Yes, Sakura fights for him when they first meet, but Nirei is the (first) one to follow him, acknowledge him as the next one at the top, and be his friend. Because he is what Nirei wants to become and what he wants to protect. He sees Sakura as the future. As a kind soul. As what the town (and himself) needs.

Sakura as a main character has always fascinated me, honestly. And his introduction to his relationship with Nirei might be the most cliché thing of all (ohhh bad guys are beating this guy I just met up. Guess I will have to fight them because I actually have a good heart!!!). But it's so much more!!! Sakura sees Nirei for who he actually is despite his lack of strength and ability to fight. He has ambition. A wish. An unstoppable desire to protect the town and become the type of man he admires so much. And I believe Sakura sees that as something he can actually relate to. As strength. Nirei is the first one to follow him willingly and believe in him, too. He's the first one to reach out. And whether Sakura likes it or not doesn't even matter because Nirei is what he needs. He's someone Sakura knows he can rely on despite his looks.

They both show strengths the other can rely on and appreciate. Sakura is good when it comes to fighting but a whole mess socially and emotionally because he has always been on his own. Nirei is good whenever they need information or emotional support and he just understands people because he watches them, while not being good at fighting. But they both share the same amount of ambition and are able to support each other in countless ways. They lift each other up. They're quite literally written for each other, in my opinion.

They also share insecurities. They know what it means to feel weak. Nirei knows what it is to feel physically hurt and bruised and what it is to carry the weight of the team because he feels like a burden for not being able to help in the same way as the others when he so desperately wants to. While Sakura knows what it is to feel emotionally abandoned, hurt, and lonely, while he also carries the weight of the team on his shoulders because he doesn't let others help him with the burden.

And they are both so, so stubborn. Nirei doesn't tell Sakura he's training and learning to fight behind his back because he'd feel even worse. And Sakura doesn't tell Nirei about feeling like a burden and a bad leader himself, because that'd only make him worse (than he believes he is). But they so desperately wish to help each other in so, so many ways.

Sakura would physically fight anyone who hurt Nirei. He has been protecting him from the very beginning without almost any hesitation. He met his guiding light and proceeded to never let him go. Nirei, on the other hand, is so protective emotionally of Sakura, always caring for him and longing to reach out and get him out of the dark because he can't see he is Nirei's guiding light too.

They're also so, so bad at showing these things. Because Sakura keeps protecting Nirei and keeping him out of fights but that only ever makes Nirei feel like he should be doing something else to help (Sakura only wants to keep him safe because he is precious to him). Nirei wants to reach out to Sakura and shower him with all the love he refuses to ask for but doesn't because doing so would only make Sakura overwhelmed (he has been holding himself back for so long, I swear).

I don't want to talk about this much because I meant to make a post about this, but... Nirei has been holding back his love and care for Sakura for so damn long (shout out to @/cantdrawtosavemylife for saying this actually) and in chapter 146 I swear he just couldn't hold it in anymore and ended up doing a love confession mid-battle. "It's not a love conf-" to me it is. Shut up. I love them.

So what I was saying--

Their characters truly develop thanks to each other.

Sakura learns to care and love for others thanks to all the characters, really, but you can't ignore the favoritism he has towards protecting Nirei and the guilt he specifically feels whenever he gets hurt.

And how he goes from: "Nirei, don't fight"

To: "Okay, I will trust him. I count on you, Nirei"

In like, two pages.

And yes, it's thanks to other characters too that Sakura manages to trust others and not fight completely on his own, lending some control to his friends. But it's the trust he has in Nirei's (and Suo's!!) words that make him improve so much emotionally.

Nirei's quite literally Sakura's heart and logic who can finally make the mess inside of him make sense.

Ohh, but Sakura is Nirei's future, too. His strength. His ambition.

Nirei learns to stand up for himself only because he wants to help Sakura get to the top. Because he promised him. Not only because of that of course, he already wanted to be stronger before meeting Sakura and other characters believe in him too, but now he has somebody to support and fight for.

So he starts only being able to help him out with his brain and heart.

To now be able to at least defend himself properly in a fight so Sakura can keep going forward without looking back.

And not only that! He's now able to fight his fears and be ready to face whoever if it means Sakura won't do it on his own.

And everything because Sakura trusts him.

And I could keep talking about how they're each other's guiding lights and bring out the best of one another. I could mention all the times they spend together which is, like, idk, every damn chapter because if you separate them they might die. I could talk for hours about how their characters wouldn't exist without each other and how Nirei (and Suo. Never forget Suo. I love you, king) will forever be Sakura's right-hand man. Etc etc etc.

Buuuuuut I got tired of writing so I'll just say:

Nirei sees the good heart in Sakura and Sakura sees the strength in Nirei and their dynamic is my favorite thing from this manga.

[pomefioredove]

Noble Bell ; Book One, Part I ; The King of Truands

what if you were sent to Noble Bell College instead?

type of post: series characters: rollo, original characters (pierrot, bou, phoenix) additional info: reader is gender neutral, this is mostly my own vision, influenced by Disney's Hunchback, the 1939 movie, and the original novel

prologue | the king of truands, one | the king of truands, two |

Chapter One

That night, while you slept on uncomfortable bed of straw and mildewed wood, a council was held.

It is important to note that, for all its rules, and there were many, the body of staff of the proud Noble Bell College were rather removed from the common life. Outside the realm of the lecture hall and the office, the scholars were governed by a democratic and elected student council, that which organized the events, kept order, and administered discipline, when necessary.

The council was entirely egalitarian, but there are three key members: The Justice of the Peace, now sitting at the right hand of the stand, looking rather bored, The Vice President, M. Bou de Neige, whom we have already met, and The President, who is unusually absent on this chilled evening.

These three people are responsible for an entire body of students. They are looked up to, not only as scholars, but as diplomats, peacekeepers, and leaders. They are expected to keep the students best interests close to heart, to be the bridge between the scholar and the staff, and this is no easy burden, despite most of the council being no older than sixteen years of age.

You must understand, then, the significance of tonight's council.

Gathered around the dark hall, illuminated by the fire burning at one end of the long room, scholars and staff alike exchange whispers, glances, and moods.

"As far as I'm aware, they're still on school grounds," the Justice of the Peace scratches his head with his quill, and a spurt of black ink stains his light brown hair. "One of my men saw them going with Gregoire to La Tombe."

Bou de Neige, who had, up until this point, been rather quiet, grimaces. "The fool. He just can't help himself, can he?"

"Hospitality is a virtue," says the headmaster, a graying, old man in a white cloak by name of Monsieur Diacre.

"Where is the President?"

"No one can find him," Bou says. "I will be speaking for him tonight."

"Perhaps we should postpone until he's been found?" a council member echoes.

"As much as I would like to, this matter is grave," Monsieur Diacre says. "A decision must be made tonight. The fate of this stranger depends on our council."

A low murmur reverberates through the room.

"Now, I have received word from two arcane academies, and there, no mention has been found of this place they say they came from, in any language, in any history. There is, in principle, no proof that this person has ever existed.

Despite this, they have appeared at our doorstep, in our clothes. By merit, the Bell of Solace has seen them fit as a student of Noble Bell College."

Bou stands. "With all due respect, sir, I strongly disagree. How do we know they are not a thief, a beggar, or a vagrant? You know well the problems Fleur City has-"

"There is another thing," Monsieur Diacre says, calm despite the tension in the hall. "Perhaps even more grave."

"And that is?"

"If you will recall, some hours ago, in my office?"

"Yes," Bou says, sitting down again with his arms crossed over his broad chest. "A useless conversation about their home, which does not exist, because they are a liar, a thief."

"Not so. Remember the way their eyes clouded when we discussed the Bell, the school, and the ceremony? How they asked, in that confounded tone, about magic? Even you must know that they were truthful then,"

He narrows his eyes. The Justice of the Peace, who had, up until that point, been scratching the "Ph" of his name onto the stand with the fine point of his quill, finally looked up.

"You don't mean to say they don't know about magic?"

"That's impossible," Bou says, though his eyes are downcast, seemingly lost in the memory of their conversation.

"Perhaps we have become too dependent on the academics. The sciences," Monsieur Diacre says. "That we forget the power of miracle."

"You are sure, then- that this person- this stranger- has no magic?"

"None whatsoever?" the Justice of Peace echoes.

Monsieur Diacre gives them both a hard stare. "Monsieur de Neige, you were closest to them. Did anything seem strange as you walked them to my office?"

The boy presses his lips together to make a firm line. "...I did have such an impression,"

"We must consider the reality," he continues, "That is that we have a young person, born and raised without magic, on our campus."

A heavy silence follows. Only the matrons, the professors of Noble Bell College, old and dressed in gray, bell-shaped habits, murmur amongst themselves.

"But I do hope," one whispers, "That we will not keep them."

"I pity the housewardens if they are to be carried to their doors for shelter. I would rather shelter a thief!"

"A sign of bad luck for certain. The greatest calamities! It's no wonder we had such low exam scores last year,"

Bou leans on his elbows against the wood of the stand and grumbles.

"So, what will we do?"

"There are options," the headmaster says. "This very building was once a symbol of hope, a sanctuary for outcasts. I know how our scholars pride themselves on tradition..."

"And the other?" Bou asks, eyes narrowing.

"I am of the opinion," one older, respected professor says. "That it would be better for the scholars of Noble Bell, and the people of Fleur City, if that strange thing were not in our walls."

The room erupts into a frenzy of murmurs, whispers, and hisses. Monsieur Diacre sighs.

"...That is a possibility. I have received offer from Headmaster Crowley of Night Raven College, as he is looking for a new boarder, and would be willing to accommodate a magicless persons. We could-"

"That will not be necessary,"

Despite the obvious unrest, the symphony of whispers, the crackling of the fire, the single voice, the unwavering presence at the large doors of the hall, cold, dignified, carries over the room.

"President Flamme," Bou de Neige says. He is not greeted in return.

"Please thank Monsieur Crowley for the offer, and send him on his way. They will be staying at Noble Bell," the boy says, walking briskly into the room, cutting through the mass of students and staff like a hot blade.

He climbs the steps to the stand and sits between the Vice President and the Justice of the Peace. Both stare at him as if they were looking at a ghost.

"On what grounds, Monsieur Flamme?" the headmaster asks. A few heads nod in agreement.

"By our rules," he says. "If the Bell of Solace has chosen them, then they are ours."

For the first time, Bou seems flustered, stumbling over his words and making a spectacle of himself.

"But- well, yes, that is the rule, but- you must consider- there will always be exceptions! They made trouble at orientation, they ran away with Gregoire, and that's not even mentioning- no magic! How can they be expected to study at this college with no magic?"

"Compose yourself, Vice President," Flamme says sternly, folding his hands in front of himself on the table. "Noble Bell has seen them fit for our academy. There are greater powers at work here.

And who knows? Our Bell works in mysterious ways. Some day, they may be of great use to us."

"You are suggesting we enroll them as a student, then?"

The council waits with baited breath. After an amount of suspense, he nods.

"I am. Shall we vote?"

Chapter Two

You jolt awake to the sound of hard knocking on the door.

The makeshift home Pierrot had brought you to the evening prior looked quite different in the light of morning. You could now make out the interior:

On all sides, you are, once again, surrounded by stone walls. On one, the door, large and heavy. Above you, the ceiling is high, vaulted, and tiled.

Everything is thick with grime and dust.

On either side of you are what appear to be two large stone benches, engraved with arches, men in robes, and writing in a language you don't understand. Atop these benches are a number of things: papers, quills, bundles of clothing, a block of moldy cheese, and many, many books, piled and shelved as if this small place, whatever it was when Pierrot found it, had been baptized a library.

The boy himself, across the straw-covered floor, is just now waking, bleary-eyed and confused.

"Who is it?" asks Pierrot.

A low, annoyed voice comes from the other side of the stone door.

"Housewarden and Vice President de Neige. I've come on official council duty,"

The color drains from Pierrot's face. "Yes, just a moment!"

"Pierrot?" you ask, following him as he scrambles to his feet.

"You must speak to him first, I'll be out in a moment!" he ushers you to the heavy door, drags it open, and then closes it behind you with the unpleasant scrape of stone on stone.

The morning on the field is crisp and chilled, somehow much colder than the little stone room. Bou de Neige is standing in front of you, his arms crossed, an unpleasant scowl on his lips.

"Is he hiding?"

"He said he would be out in a moment,"

"Very well," Bou says. "I suppose we may as well start without him. I've come to prepare you for your classes."

You blink. "...My... classes..."

He scowls again. "Yes, and don't look so dumb. A student of Noble Bell ought to conduct themselves with the poise of the Righteous Judge himself. The council and staff held a vote last night. Despite your obvious lack of abilities, the Bell of Solace has chosen you for Noble Bell College, and thus, you will be permitted to study with us for the foreseeable future. Understood?"

You nod. He seems... unhappy, you think. Or perhaps he's always like that...

"Good," Bou crosses his arms. "You should consider yourself quite lucky. You have powerful allies on your side."

A loud, obtrusive crashing, and a high scream come from inside the little building. The stone door suddenly cries open again, and out comes Pierrot, now dressed in a black and white uniform, similar to de Neige's, except with pants rather than a frock. His hat is lopsided. Bou stares at him with clear disdain.

"This concerns you, as well Gregoire," de Neige says, hands on his hips.

"Me?"

"Wipe that stupid look off your face," he scowls. "Now, listen. You,"

de Neige points at your chest. "...Are useless in the practice of magic. Correct?"

You nod.

"And you-" he points at Pierrot. "Have lost your scholarship, your dorm accommodations, and your respect. You buffoon."

Pierrot blushes and sticks his hands in his pockets, as if feeling their emptiness. One has a finger-sized hole you can see his pinky wiggling out of.

"The council has come up with a solution that would be beneficial to the both of you. As an act of charity, the expenses of the new scholar have been covered by the college. That includes your books, uniforms, and meals. This does not change the fact that you at a clear academic disadvantage; magicless.

Here is the proposition: you and Gregoire, from the moment you accept, will count for one student. You will share your school materials, meals, and clothing provided by your scholarship, you will study together, take the same classes, and in return, he will perform the necessary magic for both of you."

You and Pierrot share a glance.

Bou sighs. "I, personally, would have never come up with such a ridiculous idea, but... unfortunately... your old tutor seems to have faith in you still, Gregoire,"

Pierrot's face goes pale. "You mean-"

"Either that," de Neige interrupts. "Or he simply thinks you are too weak-willed and incompetent to take advantage of them. I expect your answer before the first bell."

He turns on his heels, long, dark hair whipping behind him, and disappears into the grove, on a dirty cobblestone path back to the school.

"...Well?" a voice says from beneath you. You jump, and look down to see the goat, Hugo. Talking. You're still getting used to that...

"Where have you b... never mind," you say. "What do you think, P- Pierrot?"

You look back around to see the gentleman on his knees in front of you, his hands clasped as if in prayer. He's giving you terrible puppydog eyes.

"Please, please, please, this could be my only opportunity! I have nothing else! My studies- Noble Bell is everything!"

You grimace. "...I don't know. I just met you."

For a moment, he almost looks... taken aback, as if he found it strange of you to consider him, of all people, a suspicious character.

His voice drops, and he answers carefully.

"...I swear to you, by my quill, by my hopes of success, not to even approach you without your permission and consent, but, for the Judge's sake, give me a meal plan!"

Hugo bursts out into bleating laughter, and even you smile.

"...Alright," you say. "Let's go give him an answer, then."

Chapter Three

The dining hall, eerily void of living bodies at this early hour, is a thin, and humble building reaching towards the edge of the campus.

Hidden by the monotonous stone walls of the school, it is rather indistinct, the only remarkable thing being that it is held between courtyards on both sides, making it a sort of bridge between one row of buildings and the other, not unlike the stone bridges that hold the embrace between the island and the city.

This modest, almost dull exterior is deceptive, though, as appearances so often are. Once inside the hall, one is met with the magnificent vaulted ceilings, painted dark with stars, held high by the thinnest of thin, delicate arches on the walls, themselves sheltering bodies of stained glass in every color the eye can perceive. Warmed by candlelight and the fire crackling at one end of the magnificent hall, it is nothing short of... well, magic.

The body, no matter how exquisite, dull, or deformed, is nothing without the matter of the soul.

You tilt your head. In a sad sort of way, the feeling reminds you of your straw bed. Dirty, but warmer than the harsh morning outside.

"What did the building used to be?"

"Hm?"

Pierrot hums, smiling as if he had not heard you, preoccupied with piling his plate. You had counted sixteen strips of bacon so far. At this rate, he would build a tower high enough to touch the painted stars on the ceiling.

"Where you sleep. Your room. It's not a dorm, is it?" you ask, following behind, setting a fruit or two on his plate when the opportunity presents itself.

"More oranges," Hugo demands from beneath you. You concede.

Pierrot finishes off his mountain of breakfast with a few slices of bread, and then leads you off to a far corner of the magnificent dining hall.

"Oh, no. A mausoleum,"

"A what?"

"Don't worry, it's empty," he says. "...I think. I've never checked. I recall reading that the bodies from the old cemetery had been moved."

"Cemetery?"

"Fleur City is full of them," Hugo says. "I've been to my fair share. People just leave flowers all over 'em. A free meal is a free meal, right?"

Pierrot nods in agreement, though he doesn't really seem to be listening. You grimace.

"Yes. The field is covered in tombstones. They're quite pretty," he says. "But the bodies were reburied under the tiles in Noble Bell a long time ago."

Each thing they add seems to be more concerning than the last.

Hugo bleats. "You're gonna have to get used to the cadavers, y'know. This place is old, and full of 'em... and their parts,"

"Yuck,"

"Nonsense," Pierrot says. "There is beauty and life in everything, even death itself. Such is the danse macabre."

You and Hugo share a look. What did he say he was, again...?

"Do you think he came out like that, or was he taught?"

"Rude," Pierrot mumbles. "But one might say it runs in my family."

He offers you a slice of bread, and you decline. The headache you'd been fighting off since first light is making you nauseous.

"Tell us about your family," anything to distract yourself now.

Pierrot smiles, his features warming like the sun on a winter day. He always seems quite pleased to talk about himself.

"I'm afraid it's nothing interesting. My father is a notary, and I have five brothers, though most are older than I. The closest in age, a year younger, is at another arcane academy. Alas, I was disowned, and haven't spoken to them in some time,"

"Unsurprising," Hugo mutters. He snags the slice of bread that would have been yours off the plate, between his teeth, and returns to lying under the table.

You lean into your elbow. "Why were you disowned?"

"By my passion," he smiles. "See, I tried to be a guard, but wasn't brave enough. I became a religious man, but was not devout enough, and couldn't drink enough, anyway. I tried carpentry, but wasn't strong enough. At last, I realized I was good at nothing- therefore, I became a writer."

"And your family didn't approve?"

"Not quite. But then I was here," Pierrot becomes quiet, his eyes turned up at the colored windows of the hall with a sort of holy reverence.

"...And the rest is history."

You blink. Disowned by his family, stripped of his scholarship and thrown out of his own dorm by his housewarden?

He's resilient, at least. You'll give him that.

"And your scholarship?"

"Bah, that was nothing. I simply... printed a pamphlet on free thought that the school officials did not care for,"

"Your dorm?"

"I annoyed the housewarden,"

This guy can't catch a break. No wonder he was so desperate for your help.

"Who's the housewarden?" you ask, watching him absent-mindedly scratch beneath his cap.

"Of L'Universite? You've already met him. He is the one who came to see us this morning, Bou de Neige,"

You hum. Of course... Perhaps he is always that unhappy, then.

"I don't miss him. I kept to myself at L'Universite. The students were... unpleasant," Pierrot shudders, as if taken by some unfelt chill, and you raise an eyebrow.

He goes on without question. "You'd assume, with such a name, that the dorm is only for the most exemplary of scholars, but they're unruly. I was almost burnt alive only once, though,"

Huh. "Why is it called that?"

"The three dorms of Noble Bell are based upon the ancient divisions of Fleur City. On one side, the university district- L'Universite- on one, the aristocratic gardens- here, called La Ville- and in the center, the sacred island, which we call The City," he explains, snapping a crisp piece of bacon in half.

"...But the histories of the dorms have little to do with their personalities. They're only to pay homage to the time when Noble Bell was established. Up until Monsieur de Neige, L'Universite had no housewarden, as per tradition. It was overseen by the college itself..."

"Then the kids got too rough, and the administration had had enough of 'em. I heard about that," Hugo's voice comes from under the table.

Pierrot nods. "Now, de Neige has completely turned it around. He punishes anyone who steps out of line,"

This is a strange place, you think for the umpteenth time.

Chapter Four

Fed, sated, and warmed by good conversation, Pierrot leads you through the delicate halls of Noble Bell College with a renewed lust for life in his step.

He goes about, pointing towards windows and great pillars and plaques on the walls and floor, explaining their origins, which came from where, from what year and artist.

You nod along, content to just listen while your mind wandered.

It feels too real to be a dream, but it must be one. In your world, animals don't talk, humans don't cast spells, and schools don't have astrology classes.

Hugo had disappeared again, likely off looking for table scraps. He seemed to have a will of his own. Pierrot hadn't noticed yet.

"And the tile from this courtyard was repurposed from the Place de Grève..."

He talks so much to himself, it almost feels as if you are alone while right beside him. Despite that, and that he's facing away from you, his sunny self pointed toward the tiled courtyard he seems so enthusiastic about, you can't help but feel as if someone is watching you.

That strange, unnerving feeling had been following you since you left the dining hall. No matter how many times you turned over your shoulder, reassuring yourself that it was only your nerves, it lingered.

Every corner or so, another dignified scholar will pass you by, dressed in the same uniform, quiet, poised, looking straight ahead. Once, you walk by someone shrouded in a blue cloak, singing "Thaumarks to spare? Thaumarks to spare?" to whom you apologize for having nothing.

You don't even know what a thaumark is.

Pierrot leads you through yet another courtyard, and the feeling of eyes on your person never leaves.

It's beginning to weigh on you.

"How much longer?"

"Hm?" he finally turns to look at you, and the strange feeling subsides, slipping back into the shadows of the hall.

"Not much. Don't worry, Scriptorium is easy. As long as you pretend to be busy, no one will bother you,"

Chapter Five

Pierrot could not have given a truer description.

Though, he could have at least warned you about the boredom.

The melodious sound of forty quills on paper echoes off the stone walls and tiled floors. There is no talking, no eating, no foot-tapping, no whispers. The faint sound of the city, as close as it is, feels distant from here.

The parchment before you is as empty as it was at the beginning of class, and the book you'd been provided is on the very same page. The student in front of you has filled two pages already, delicately copying the contents of the book onto the parchment.

Pierrot, sitting beside you, seems to be writing something of his own. At least he seems entertained...

Then, all at once, everyone begins gathering their quills and ink, standing from their seats without a word. Pierrot jolts, shuffling around his things to cover his pages of writing as the other students pass him by.

Though he waits until everyone else is gone before getting up himself, avoiding their prying eyes is useless. Waiting outside the lecture hall is none other than his ex-housewarden himself.

"You. Come with me," Bou says, sharp, crimson eyes boring into you. "We have some things to discuss."

You share a glance with Pierrot. He looks sympathetic, waving you goodbye as de Neige leads you in the other direction.

"I trust you enjoyed Scriptorium?" he doesn't look at you when he speaks.

"Oh- um, yes,"

"Good. Copying manuscripts is an honored tradition of Noble Bell," he says.

"Until the invention of the printing press, all books were made by hand. Though the press made the process fast and inexpensive, the beauty of manuscripts remains unmatched."

You look at him. "You seem to have a lot of traditions,"

He returns your look with a glare. "We are a proud school. It would do you well to adopt a similar attitude. And not to let the idealistic drivel of that fool get to you,"

By "that fool", you assume he means Pierrot. That boy keeps getting stranger and stranger...

"What did he do, anyway?"

de Neige mumbles "heresy", and then clears his throat. "Nothing of your concern. Now, hurry up. You're dawdling,"

Chapter Six

As you pass through the halls of Noble Bell, you think of how easy one could get lost in a place like this.

It's almost labyrinthine. It seems as if every turn leads to another lecture hall, another crypt, another library...

"You should consider yourself fortunate," de Neige says. He's been going on about Noble Bell for some time.

"Of all the arcane academies, Noble Bell College's curriculum has the least practical magic."

"Right," you mutter, following him up another narrow flight of stairs.

"And despite that," he says, "You are already being coddled. The headmaster is... soft. Which brings us to the purpose of my visit."

Bou stops in front of a narrow wooden door and turns in a swift movement to face you. "Follow me," he says.

He takes something out of the depths of his pocket and slots it into the heavy, iron-bound wooden door, then pushes it open as if it were a silk curtain.

You follow him up another flight of stairs, and into a darkened room. The only light, cold and gray, comes from a handful of flower-shaped windows, whose glow illuminates the piles of books and dusty furniture cluttering the small room. Another staircase at the far end leads further into the unknown.

Your eyes are drawn to the window closest to yourself, and you peer out over the island, studying the city, its shape, its color, the curve of its river. You could spend your life up here, alone, comforted only by stone and the dim, foggy noon outside.

Bou hums, drawing your attention back to the present moment. He seems familiar with the room, walking about it and dusting its worn furniture with the sleeve of his uniform.

"Here is the north bell tower. You will be staying here from now on,"

Your eyes widen. "But..."

"Careful. It would be unwise to reject such a generous offer," Bou says, refusing to face you. "The bell towers are spacious, quiet, and warm. Winters are quite cold here."

"But Pierrot?"

Finally, you can see the crimson of his eyes, as he turns over his shoulder to glare at you.

"The student council thinks it improper for you to be living alone with Gregoire. He will stay in La Tombe,"

"But-"

"The key," Bou says, ignoring your protests. He takes something cold out of his pocket and places it in your hand. His skin is almost as chilled as the metal.

"I'll see to it that your mail is forwarded here,"

He turns and leaves you in the room, the rough, cold key still cradled in your open palm. You scoff. What mail?

No one knows you. And no one you know knows where you are.

You don't belong. You're an outcast here.

Your fingers tighten around the key. The least you can do is tell Pierrot. You don't want him to worry when you don't come back tonight, after all.

Finally finding some semblance of purpose, you take long, confident steps back the way you came.

Down the narrow wooden stairs, out the left door, down the stone ones, through this passage, this hallway, this turn, then this, and then...

...No. You don't recognize this hallway. It's darker, and the ceiling is lower. You must have gone too far down.

You take a breath. Don't worry. You'll just retrace your steps.

It isn't over. You've been telling yourself that all day. This is not where it ends. You'll find a way out of this.

All of this.

And then, you're no longer alone.

Though there is no noise, no light, no voice that would indicate a human presence, you are suddenly quite aware that there's someone behind you, watching you from the way you came.

All the hairs on the back of your neck stand up and you stay in place. If you are to turn now, will you see someone- or something- standing behind you? A pair of eyes watching you from the doorway you'd just ducked under?

Or, worse- will you see nothing at all?

You decide you don't want to find out either way.

You keep going. Into the dark of the hall, over another threshold and another, around the corner. At some lengths, the feeling seems to subside, giving you a moment's worth of peace, and then it returns.

The halls are getting narrower. You have an inexplicable feeling that you are no longer in the school, but somewhere much deeper, much older, primeval.

The scuff of shoe against stone, which most certainly did not come from your own feet, makes you go cold.

"Who's there?" you shout.

The only response in your own echo.

"Come out! Stop following me! Leave me alone!"

The words come tumbling out without much thought. You can feel yourself slipping into a panic.

Thoughts chase each other through your mind, and then suspicions and paranoia poison those thoughts. You must ask yourself now, what is this? What's there, in the dark, just out of sight?

And your mind answers for you: it is a monster.

There is a monster in Noble Bell College, and it wants you.

"Leave me be!" you yell at nothing. You're starting to get desperate.

Nothing happens. Then, all at once, a light comes from ahead of you, not behind, and someone shouts:

"Who's there?"

You turn your back to the dark behind you in a frenzy, and, finally, the feeling of being watched disappears entirely.

"Me! I'm here!"

Around the corner comes a boy, one you had not seen before. Not tall, but not short, sturdily built, we'll say. He's quite good looking, at least compared to the other students you'd met, with light brown hair spilling out of a short, stubby ponytail, blue eyes, darkened by the black of the hall, and, curiously, the wisps of a beard on his chin. He's quite unlike any of the other students you'd seen so far.

But, the more pressing question-

"Who are you?" he asks it before you can.

You say your name, and his eyes widen. His stern expression turns merry, and he smiles.

"Ah, I know you. The magicless one,"

That's not very reassuring. You grimace.

"...How do you know who-"

"You shouldn't be down here alone, you know. It's not safe. We've had some thieves on campus lately,"

"Thieves?"

"Yes. Or so I've heard," he nods solemnly, and then a strange mood comes about him.

He smirks and puts his hand on his hip, his other at his hilt, purposefully drawing your eyes to what must be a sword. A big one, too, if his smile is any indication.

"But don't worry. I'll protect you. You know, I haven't seen you in person yet. The way everyone's been talking about you, I assumed you were some sort of monster. But you're actually very pretty,"

You give him a weird look. Perhaps you were wrong- of course, he's just as strange as the others. "Um... alright...."

"Ah, where are my manners? Let me escort you back to your room."

"...Right," you say, looking over your shoulder one last time. The boy follows your gaze, and then coughs for your attention.

"Bell tower, yes?"

You look back at him and nod.

"Then let's not waste any time,"

Chapter Seven

Despite his confidence, it takes the boy a full hour to find the right passage out of the tunnels. He gets to the bell tower easy enough, at least.

Something about him tells you he's not from here, either, but you keep the thought to yourself for now.

"Well, here we are," he says, hands on his hips as if he had just accomplished something.

"...Yes. Well, thank you,"

He beams, gives you a courteous bow, locks of hair falling over his face as he does. They turn golden in the sunlight. "It was my honor. And if you need anything else-"

"There you are," someone says from within the bell tower. You recognize the gruff voice, but before you can answer, the heavy wooden door bursts open and Hugo tumbles out.

He chuffs. "We've been worried sick, 'ya know! Pierrot's all over the place! Who's the stiff?"

You turn to the boy, and his smirk sharpens at the acknowledgement. "Um... I don't know, actually. Who are you?"

"My name is Phoenix. It means, ah, sun bird," he chuckles.

You and Hugo exchange a glance, and he stops laughing. "I'm the Justice of the Peace of the student council. I was doing my rounds when I heard you shouting,"

You turn back to Hugo to explain. "I got lost,"

"No kidding!"

"I didn't know you had a kid," Phoenix says, the same sly smile on his lips. You almost scoff.

"Yeah, and he doesn't take kindly to pigs!" Hugo says. "Now, get lost! That's our magicless human!"

As the two go back-and-forth, a little glimmer of white against the dark brown of the floor catches your eye. You kneel, and pull a thin envelope from under the wooden door. It has your name on the back, and a bite taken out of the corner. You roll your eyes at that. Hugo.

The goat sets off, headbutting Phoenix back down the narrow stairs and leaving you alone again. You sit on the floor and open the letter.

Dearly Beloved, it starts,

The King of Truands has reviewed your case and sees you fit to join his Cour des Miracles. All thieves, beggars, vagrants, or otherwise outcasts, welcome.

You turn over the parchment, noting its weight, and stuck to the back is a thin pendant, woven of purple and teal twine, in the shape of a leaf. At its heart, a small, golden cross.

How strange...

You squint at the pendant, and then the letter, which, quite rudely, bursts into flame in your hand.

You drop the fiery letter and it dissolves into ashes on the floor. You huff. Magic...

"And stay out!" Hugo's voice returns from the stairs. For a goat, he certainly has a loud bark.

The white of his small head crowns over the steps, and you stand.

"Hugo," you hold out the pendant to him. "Do you know what this is?"

The goat stops and squints, then scoffs. "One 'a those touristy necklaces. They're all over the city, I can't remember what they're for, though. Just that they don't taste good,"

You hum, bringing the pendant back towards yourself. Why would this King of Truands send you a souvenir?

"...Maybe Pierrot will know," you finally say. He seems to know a lot of useless things, after all.

You hurry to the stairs, Hugo trotting behind you. "What's the big deal?"

"I don't know," you say, paying close attention to each step. You don't want to get lost all over again, after all.

"I've had a bad feeling all day. I think this means something."

"Great, a fortune teller," Hugo sighs.

He follows you, anyway.

Chapter Eight

The sun is already setting over the city when you stumble down the steps of Noble Bell.

The sky is streaked with fiery pinks and oranges, making the school look cold and dull by comparison. Even the clouds, red and descending on the wrought iron gates like a bloodied army, turn the stone of the city into a dull, lifeless blue.

You stumble across the sports field and into the grove at the end of the island.

"Slow down!" Hugo gasps.

You don't. But you do stop at La Tombe and pull open its heavy stone door. It's dark inside.

"Pierrot?" you call for him, as if he were hiding behind a book or in a stray shoe.

Nothing.

"Hey, come look at this!"

You abandon the mausoleum and turn to its side, where Hugo is standing over an attached tomb. Its stone lid has been pushed to the ground beside it, and there's light coming from its depths.

"You think he...?" you start, unable to look away from its gaping mouth. Instead of dust and bones, there's a flight of stairs.

"Who else?" Hugo sighs. "He was looking all over for you."

"He must've panicked when the sun started going down," you murmur. "We have to get him."

"What?" Hugo asks, eyes wide. "Are you crazy?"

You take the pendant out of your pocket and hold it against the warm light coming from inside the tomb.

"I just have a feeling," you breathe in slowly, and take your first step into the grave. "Let's go find Pierrot."

[shioaoi]

Caitlyn is crumbling under the weight of it all.

It feels like the entire weight of the world is on her shoulders.

The people of Piltover are looking at her for safety and protection; the people she defied her mother to serve. The merchant houses are looking at her, expecting her to step up and be the leader of her house like her mother was, yet she and her mother never saw eye to eye, unable to agree on thing and yet so deeply loved eachother. The council is looking to her to resolve the cities conflicts, wanting her to be a part of a game she never wanted to be a part of.

She's crumbling under the hatred, the anger, the guilt.

She's the cause of all of this - because she didn't just be the daughter of house kiramman; because she had to stick her nose in places she shouldn't have; because she fell in love.

Her affection for Vi caused her to hesitate, made her not take the shot. And now she is desperate to fix things as it all slips between her fingers. She has to fix things because that is what she has to do as leader of the Kirammans, no matter the cost.

But at least she has Vi, who understands her pain, understands her part in all of this. They're together; can burden that weight together. They will set things right.

That's not how it goes though, because a single act of kindness caused a young girl to become involved.

Vi won't let another child become like her, like Jinx. Won't let someone else go through that same trauma. She has to stop this despite being willing to let Caitlyn kill her to get to Jinx.

But Caitlyn is already too far gone. She was so close to being free of it all - avenging her mother, righting the wrongs caused by her meddling. And the one who was supposed to be there, shouldering it with her, won't let it end.

It's the last straw. Vi was all she had, the one good thing to come out of all this pain and misery, the only person who didn't expect things from her because of her name and status. She should understand, why didn't she understand.

So she has to go. Caitlyn can't let this girl mess everything up. She has to rebuilt up these walls, become what her mother always wanted her to be.

Become what Piltover is expecting her to be.

[lollyposp]

SPOILERS FOR THE NEW MIRACULOUS SPECIAL

okay so i am going absolutely insane over something marinette says in this special like. insane insane it's been an hour and ive just been thinking about this one line she says

"ladybug knows. ladybug holds the truth. the world will know only what ladybug will tell it. her words will be the truth"

i mean, not only is this a HUGE weight to put on her shoulders, having to lie not just to adrien but to the ENTIRE world (sans nathalie) about gabriel, but i think it speaks so much about what a burden the ladybug role has become to marinette that she not only understands that she can just LIE to the entire world, but that they'll unconditionally believe her too. and the fact that she feels like it's her only option if she wants to preserve some sort of internal peace in adrien, and the fact that she goes through with it when she notoriously hates lying, i just. OUCH. it really speaks to how burdened she is and how quickly she's had to mature since becoming the Guardian.

honestly it does make so much sense for her character to go in that direction. ladybug has always been a strategist, it's just that the scale of her strategies has shifted from winning a battle to sort of playing mind games with everyone she knows so that she can juggle all the different roles she has. because she's smart, and because she's seen as a defacto leader figure, her word matters to EVERYONE - to paris, and to her hero team, and as she's grown more of a reputation as ladybug throughout the show, her word has slowly become law.

ladybug's line also expresses a sense of dissociation between the self, too. she's speaking in third person, but the dissociation isn't even between marinette, "a normal girl", and ladybug, hero of Paris, which is how it normally presents itself. it's between the ladybug she wants to be, a beacon of goodness, and the ladybug she needs to be: I don't know if this is the correct terminology for it (please correct me if im not), but it's almost as if ladybug is dipping her toes into political subterfuge to keep everything going the way she has it planned. like she realises that ladybug the figure has to puppeteer the masses to keep things under control, in the way she needs it to be, even if it means that ladybug the person suffers for it.

the only gripe i have with the special is that adrien is just???? not there at all???? which makes sense considering he wasn't there for Gabriel's defeat either, and i know that's just to establish a conflict in marinette and adrien's dynamic in season 6, but it still makes me upset that the OTHER PROTAGONIST of the show is nowhere to be seen. i love marinette, but when it comes to the story, the Guardian subplot is marinette's, and the hawkmoth plot should ALWAYS have been adrien's. giving it to her makes it feel like adrien is just a side character whose dad just happens to be hawkmoth.

there were a lot of other dynamics laid out in the special that i hope were set up because they're important to season 6. nathalie might become a mentor figure to marinette, as they both know the truth about gabriel and because marinette is in dire need of an adult she can trust (even if that adult is MAYURA??? which is kind of insane). or marinette and kagami both knowing the truth and kagami clearly disapproving of her dishonesty would be really fun to explore: i would love to see growing tension between them as marinette falls further into this "ladybug's word is god" mentality while she tries to keep up all the lies she's set up, and kagami trying to help her but also disagreeing with the entire set up, it would be frankly awesome. (it would also be awesome to see whether marinette trusts alya with the truth, or if she keeps it only to kagami and nathalie.)

all in all, honestly the special is pretty good. marinette's line about ladybug's word being truth will haunt me forever and if they don't make that mentality important to her character in season 6 i might riot

[shantechni]

I can't find the post right now because I never bothered to save it like an idiot💀but I came across someone talking about one of Splinter's scenes in New Girl in Town when Leo lets the others handle a mission without him and I wanted to add my two cents.

Yeah, it seems wrong on the surface for Splinter to say Leo wasn't in a position to decide whether or not he should lead the guys, and it also seems unfair for Splinter to say he should bear the responsibility of leadership instead of shirking it off on Raph out of frustration with his brothers and their lack of appreciation or understanding. It especially may make one think Leo should be allowed to throw a tantrum because leading isn't going how he wants it to, and his brothers should see how it feels to function without him.

But that wasn't the point.

The point was that Leo allowed his brothers to walk off into a dangerous situation without guidance simply because he was tired of going back and forth with Raph and his criticisms.

Mikey and Donnie have their moments too, but in this particular episode, they're in the background as they witness another falling out between their leader and the resident hothead of the family. They didn't ask for Raph to take over, and no sooner than later do they realize Raph didn't know what and all he was signing up for when he freezes up in the middle of the fight. Donnie is the one to formulate a quick plan of action as he snaps Raph back to reality and incapacitates Snakeweed long enough for them to make a swift exit from the hideout, while Mikey remains unconscious for nearly the remainder of the episode due to Raph's poor planning.

And I seriously need to stress what exactly Splinter tells Leo: "Leadership is not about being appreciated. It is about responsibility. It doesn't matter that the burden is heavy. It matters that you carry it. Now go find your brothers."

He never said Leo was wrong for seeking appreciation; in fact, his future words and actions support the guys learning to show appreciation to Leo, and Splinter is understanding everytime Leo expresses his distress over being responsible for his brothers when they love making his job more difficult than it needs to be. But he needed Leo to understand that when it came to completing a mission effectively without unnecessarily endangering each other, appreciation holds little importance in the moment. You can't use appreciation as a deciding factor for whether or not you should let the team fall apart because your younger brother stomped his foot at you for the umpteenth time.

Splinter emphasizes that leadership isn't something to be taken lightly, and Leo needs to realize it's not something you can just pass on when you aren't in the mood to hold it.

Now, one can argue that it does matter to some extent that the burden of leadership is heavy and their argument would be valid; they're still kids after all and the burden may gain some pounds depending on the situation. That's why a leader leads a team though, so that the weight of that burden can be shared by the members and their efforts when the leader starts to buckle.

But, once again, Splinter is right. It does matter more that Leo carries that burden, or at least the most weight, because he's the leader. Not only are they at a point where Leo is permanently cemented in place as the leader, and things would undoubtedly be shaken up in an undesired manner should he thrust someone else into that position this far in, but his brothers aren't entirely cut out for leadership. Planning ahead doesn't come easy to Raph, Donnie gets tunnel vision and misses details that would be obvious otherwise, and Mikey doesn't always think his actions through before doing them (a bit of blind faith if you will). That's not to say they can't defy the odds at times, but in the grand scheme of things, they function much better as a team with a leader, and Leo functions much better as a leader with a team.

Team building exercises aside, the way Splinter speaks and phrases things gives the same vibes as a parent telling their child not to make a habit out of something they shouldn't be doing. He was evidently upset with Leo for allowing his frustrations to do the decision making for him, but he specifically wanted Leo to not make this a recurring thing because they won't just fall apart as a team by that point: they'll fall apart as brothers. Giving someone what they want because they irked you into doing it can establish a pattern of behavior that no one wants to deal with the consequences of, and irking someone into giving you what you want isn't something you should do either. It sucks, believe me I know, but Leo shouldn't just let his brothers get their way because he's fed up with them, and Raph shouldn't always get his way because he doesn't agree with Leo's way of doing things.

Doing that creates the opportunity for something bad to happen that could've easily been avoided, similar to letting a child do something you know they should be broken out of before that something becomes a problem in the future.

And Splinter doesn't seem mad when the guys come rushing back to the lair without Leo in tow, he sounds more disappointed than anything. As I mentioned earlier, he knows the others give Leo a hard time and he's aware that leadership is no easy role to be sworn into, but he was hopeful that his earlier lecturing would bring Leo to his senses and his son would prioritize responsibility over running off to only God knows where. He doesn't linger on his earlier conversation with Leo though, he spends a few seconds to scold Raph for instigating this entire mess in the first place. He makes sure Raph is aware of the pressure Leo has on his shoulders, with an underlying warning to not take leadership so lightly again, and orders him to find Leo.

Splinter's 15 second lecture leaves much to be desired and explained (that goes without saying), but the curt ending to it, "Now go find your brothers," says it all: leader or not, the bottom line is that your brothers are out there fighting an enemy without your help. Go find them and ensure their safety.

[mr-crawlings-wife]

Debate Club

𝙽𝚘𝚝 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜. 𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚓𝚞𝚖𝚙 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚘𝚛 𝙸 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍'𝚟𝚎 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚐𝚘𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚒𝚝.

☣️🅆🄰🅁🄽🄸🄽🄶⚠️: jealous Eun-hyuk, implied one sided rivalry, little smidge of nsfw, implied past connections, reader trying to help Hyunsu, stubbornness, talks of mental health, lowkey whipped Eun-hyuk, ooc Eun-hyuk.

*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*

Eun-hyuk hears the door to the security room open and the familiar padding of your footsteps, at this point he's memorized them.

He doesn't bother to turn around, knowing you'll approach him regardless of if he acknowledges you or not.

The papers in his hands slip and land on the floor as you so rudely yank his chair to turn him around. Putting both hands at each of his arm rests and leaning in close to his face.

The action takes his breath away. Makes him feel as if he could melt any second. Tempts him to close the distance and connect your lips to his.

He's so distracted, he almost misses what you said.

"Hikikomori... They're people who isolate themselves from the rest of society... And while being alone is comfortable for them to some degree, it's bad for their mental health.... Think about it Eun-hyuk, what would it be like to only have the monster in your head to talk to? It would worsen his state faster. He needs company! "

"There's Seok-hyeon-” he tries to shoot you down, although with a weak counter, but you disarm him with a slam to his arm rest and a rebuke.

" Seok-hyeon is a selfish, insecure and abusive asshole. I'm baffled you would even consider him as someone who's fun to talk to. Hyunsu needs someone his age! Someone who understands him! Heck even your jerk of a sister would do miles better than any of the people currently confined in the arcade! ”

"Well what if he attacks-"

"That's for me to deal with. That's my responsibility! My worry! My burden! A threat to my safety! It's got nothing to do with the rest of you!........... I can't even do much anyway after this ankle injury! Just let me be of use! Just let me be with him! He's spiralling faster like that and you know it!"

"You should care about your safety-"

"You don't get it! I'm a burden to the group right now! I can't even do simple tasks like helping carry stuff to barricade the entrance! What use do I have now except for this?................ So just let me.. Let me play therapist... Let me keep him company... He's our greatest asset and we should do all that we can to keep him sane! Right? Or do you intend to lose our sole scavenger? "

He hated how convincing your argument was. He couldn't really fight against it without making it seem like he favoured you out of everyone else.

Cause he knows you know that he would have said yes if it were someone else asking in your place to be let in, okay maybe not Eun-yu or anybody that was useful to him at the moment but anyone that falls outside of those categories? Sure.

And he wasn't quite comfortable with letting that vulnerable part of him come to light.

He hated how right you were. How you always were right. No matter what he did he never seemed to win an argument against you. Not during those simple afternoons spent in his high school debate club room and not during this stand off in the security room of Green Home. Could it really be called a stand off though?

He almost doesn't have it in him to be frustrated with you anymore as it only ever made it easier for you to get on his nerves and shoot him down. Your hits always so precise, your resolve as hard as nails. He could never win.

Even with his current authority as a leader, he still can't find it in himself to deny you of your request yet cause of how logical and efficient you make it sound.

He would be lying if he said he didn't like the small tinges of desperation in your tone. Like you were begging him. It gave him a small sense of satisfaction, allowing his imagination to run wild as you continued to babble on as he stared at you wordlessly, making you wonder if he was even listening.

How pretty would you be? On your knees? Head on his lap? Staring up at him with those pretty pretty eyes of yours? Vision glossy with unshed tears as you beg him to-

"-Hyuk-! Eun-hyuk! "

And his little fantasy goes up in flames as he's reminded of why you're arguing with him in the first place. Or more like, for who.

He didn't understand, why were you always so caught up in Hyunsu's case? Why did you care about him so much? Why weren't you afraid of him?

It irritated him in a way he couldn't explain.

Maybe that's why he can't seem to find a way to refute. Because he's so distracted by your angelic allure and the progressively growing anger inside him.

Pushing up his glasses to the top, he sighs, standing up before shifting to put his hands in his pockets and glaring at you.

"You'll be of use again once you've healed. But you won't be around for that if you throw your life away like this. "

"I won't cooperate if you don't let me have this. "

He's almost shocked by your threat. You're seriously willing to go that far? For that guy? Who can't even look him in the eyes when they speak? Seriously what do you see in him?

He feels ashamed for a moment. Why is he having such thoughts? Is this the first signs of his Monsterization?

You get impatient at his lack of response and stomp out the door, heading for the arcade. You know Mr. Han will understand you better than that heartless jerk Eun-hyuk. You only just have to plead him a few times.

As Eun-hyuk stands alone in his office, making no move to stop you as he knows once you've set your mind to it, you won't budge, he reminisces the entire conversation. Huffing slightly, he runs his hands through his hair, trying to come up with a counter argument, just about anything to sway you. Anything to keep you away from him. He can't bear this feeling any more.

*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*

𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥.

ℕ𝕖𝕩𝕥 ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣.

𝚂𝚘𝚘𝚘𝚘𝚘, 𝙸'𝚖 𝚌𝚞𝚛𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚊𝚌𝚌𝚎𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚛𝚎𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚂𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚝 𝙷𝚘𝚖𝚎!

𝙰𝚕𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝, 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞. :)

[autistichalsin]

What were Halsin's views on being archdruid of the Emerald Grove? Was it particularly stressful for him being the leader of an entire circle, especially with his mind on Thanial and Shadow Curse? Did he enjoy it at all?

Definitely not something he enjoyed; he references the downsides multiple times.

In act 1, if you ask if he won't miss being the Archdruid, he says "Miss it? Oh dear no. It's a terrible burden; takes you away from nature and forces you to deal with others' problems and personalities," followed by a warning that people who actually want the position should be treated with suspicion as they either don't understand what they're getting into or have bad intentions. Conclusion: Halsin views the role as a burdensome one that only those who don't actively seek (like himself) can be good at (but he doesn't view himself as good at leadership either).

Later, he tells the story of how he became Archdruid, which happened after the previous one fell to the curse; Halsin brought the survivors home (possibly literally carrying them, as Jaheira makes a comment about Halsin "[Carrying] his masters on his back and [being] raised their master in turn". Conclusion: taking on the role was done mostly (if not solely) out of sheer necessity and with a great deal of trauma and grief around the event, possibly leading to avoidance on his part (why he runs away from his responsibilities whenever he can).

When he gets the letter from Francesca, as noted above, he is down on himself, his leaderships, and his accomplishments, blaming himself for Kagha going astray, for Francesca having to pick up the pieces, and (if it happened) for the Rite of Thorns (or death of the remaining Druids if the Druid-Tiefling conflict happened). Conclusion: Halsin views himself as having been unsuited for the task, refusing to acknowledge his accomplishments, just his failures; his "failings" at the Grove are almost as great a source of shame for him as the Shadow Curse.

Further, there are lines where he indicates that traveling with the player is the happiest he's ever been, as well as a line from the post-Drow orgy where he mentions romanticizing his time as a sex slave; in particular, if the player pushes him a bit, he admits that the Shadow Curse robbed him of his peers and confidantes, and that further, his subsequent rise to Archdruid replaced what few friends remained with "the weight of responsibility." Conclusion: Halsin was so stressed out by being Archdruid that he romanticized his past as a sex slave as the better alternative, and similarly views traveling with the player, with the possibility of the world ending, as preferable.

So in short: Halsin hated being Archdruid because simply taking on the role was a source of great trauma for him, but no one was able to do it. With no one to lean on, the stress grew, as did his avoidance, leading to him abandoning the title the first chance he got to instead join a group where he could just be Halsin, flaws and all. As a result, this time is one of, if not the, happiest times in his life.

[maul-of-shame]

I think a lot of people are forgetting that Elrond and Galadriel didn't read LOTR and aren't aware they're going to be in laws. They don't have the 4th wall powers that we, the audience do. As far as either of them are concerned, Cborn is dead and given that Galadriel placed a higher priority on hunting Sauron than returning to him (assuming she believes that he's in Valinor), Elrond is takes the role Cborn would have had. I hope we see more Elrond and Galadriel moments in season 3 😊

They've both been through the same shit, they GET each other, and there's no 'expectation' attached to their relationship, and that is liberating when it comes to healing each other's trauma.

Absolutely, this point is spot-on!

Elrond and Galadriel's connection exists on an entirely unique plane where no one, especially not us as the audience, can dictate how their bond should look or evolve.

These two are free from the expectations or constraints of what’s “supposed” to happen based on outside knowledge. They certainly don’t see their future relationship as in-laws as a given, so their relationship is genuinely theirs to explore.

Their chemistry feels so deep and genuine precisely because it isn’t bound by any traditional family role or societal expectation.

Both Elrond and Galadriel have lived through millennia of war, loss, and hard choices, and they’ve developed a bond built on shared experiences, genuine understanding, and respect. Elrond gets Galadriel’s drive, her sacrifices, and the toll they take, while Galadriel recognizes his wisdom, patience, and loyalty. It’s rare to see characters who don’t need to explain their trauma because the other person just knows—they’ve been through the same fires.

And what makes this relationship even more intriguing is the lack of obligation or label tied to it.

There’s a liberating effect here: both of them are healing and supporting each other in ways that go beyond friendship or family ties. When they come together, it’s like two souls unburdened by destiny but bound by choice. Each moment between them is open to interpretation and possibility, and that freedom feels refreshing and real.

For Elrond, his connection with Galadriel feels like the home he never really had in the ways that matter most. Through his life, he's often been in roles of service and loyalty—to his family, to Gil-galad, to his people—but with Galadriel, he doesn’t need to be the wise, steady counselor or the responsible guardian. He can let his own vulnerabilities show, unafraid of being judged or misunderstood. In Galadriel, he sees a person who recognizes his struggles and his sacrifices without him having to speak a word, and who knows the gravity of loss in the way only someone who’s carried that burden for centuries can.

And for Galadriel, Elrond is a refuge she never expected but always needed. As much as she’s a warrior, a leader, and a force of nature, she’s also a person with deep wounds. With Elrond, she’s able to lay down her armor, put down her sword and shield, trusting him with the side of herself that’s tired, uncertain, and still healing. There’s a comfort in being with someone who doesn't require her to be constantly unbreakable. Instead of being another soldier in her battle, Elrond stands beside her as a partner, a friend, and a kindred soul.

They share this understanding, a bond that’s impossible to reduce to labels or roles. Each look, every moment between them, is layered with the kind of depth that goes beyond words—They're two people who simply get each other. Their relationship isn’t defined by duty or shaped by societal roles; it’s something they’ve chosen to build together. And perhaps that’s what makes it so liberating: their connection is entirely theirs, shaped only by the mutual respect, trust, love, and affection they’ve cultivated over time.

In a world where they both carry the heavy weight of their respective roles, this bond is like a breath of fresh air, a reminder that they don’t have to be alone in their struggles.

They’re not defined by destiny or forced together by obligation; they’re here because they choose each other.

Over and over again.

It’s a love and connection that doesn’t need words to define it or titles to legitimize it. It’s simply there, in every glance, every shared silence, and every act of unwavering support. And in a life full of responsibilities and ancient sorrows, that freedom is the truest form of peace.

[tea-mew96]

I really need to discuss ROTB Optimus Prime cuz I think he's become one of my favorite versions of the character. Spoilers and analysis below cut

I'm aware that there's many who aren't happy about the way ROTB Optimus was characterized, but I'm not one of them. On the contrary, I think ROTB Optimus is brilliant. I sincerely believe that this movie improved on something that I feel the Bay films missed out and failed on: it blatantly showed this is an Optimus who hurts and does the things he says or does because he's hurting and doesn't want himself or anyone else to needlessly suffer.

There are many, myself included, who view Bayverse Optimus as a guy who has been so drained by being a war leader, who is so tired of being backstabbed, that he is no longer willing to give second chances to the Decepticons, who have made it clear time and time again that they're not going to surrender and won't stop their destructive ways. Because of that, it leaves Bayverse Optimus no choice but to fight back just as dirty as the Cons do.

The problem is that while this is a perspective that can be concluded to, it's not one that the Bay films capitalized on. They had the chance to see between the lines of their own storytelling and emphasis Bayverse Optimus' mental state, but rarely did. You get slivers of it in AOE and TLK, but it gets overshadowed by the all the problems those two movies are riddled with. I believe this issue is primarily due to Bay's often limited line of thinking as a director, but it could be caused by other factors.

ROTB emphsizes Optimus Prime's state of mind frequently throughout its runtime. You see it when Mirage talks to Noah about how Optimus seems to be blaming being stuck on Earth on himself, you see it in Elena's conversation with Noah by the campfire, and you see it when Optimus Primal and Airazor discuss how on-edge Optimus Prime appears to be. But I'd say it's the most obvious after Scourge stabs Bumblebee and Optimus states later that "It should've been me." Holy shit, if that line doesn't raise a thousand red flags I don't know what will.

ROTB Optimus is very much putting all the burden on himself to the detriment on his own mental health. This "put all the burden on me" attitude is not uncommon for an Optimus-you can see this trait in almost every version of the character-but it does paint a worrying picture.

Also like many iterations of Optimi, ROTB Optimus understands when an opponent can be reasoned with and when they need to have their ass kicked. He recognizes, after being mocked by Scourge and getting his ass handed to him at the museum fight, that Scourge, Battletrap, and Nightbird are not interested in peace. The only options they give you are surrender, join them (either willingly or forcibly), or die. They're also not just your average Decepticon: they are powerful minions of Unicron, and Airazor describes Scourge as being all but invincible.

ROTB Optimus rightfully concludes that Unicron must be stopped and that the first step of doing so is to kill off the Terrorcons. While I'm sure some people probably didn't like it, Optimus' blatant declarations on killing Scourge didn't bother me. I did notice how many of his death threats were after Bee was out for the count and most are a banter response to the ones Scourge gives out first. It's also important to note that the only way Optimus Prime was able to get a final blow on Scourge was with the assistance of Noah and Primal.

TL;DR ROTB Optimus is what Bayverse Optimus should've been and still maintains the traits of an Optimus.

[blueteller]

have not finished the novel but can you please spoil if the family of original cale knows cale isn't the real one? and did krs!cale tell anyone he transmigrated?

Good question! If you don't mind getting SPOILERS, I'm happy to answer!

In short, no, the Henituse family members don't find out, at least not in Part 1 (as Part 2 is still in progress).

I also do not get the feeling that they ever will, because when Cale meets OG Cale, who now goes by Kim Rok Soo himself, he's encouraged to embrace the identity of Cale Henituse the same way OG Cale had fully embraced his new identity in Korea.

Cale's old team on Earth 1 noticed that their "Team Leader" had become different, but he also seems happier and adopted a daughter (his reincarnated mom), so they don't mind the change and are actually glad for him. Which is the perfect reflection of how the Henituse family reacted when Cale "finally" stopped being "trash", because both Cale and OG Cale were not happy before the transmigration swap and everybody could see it. So them changing so suddenly was seen as them "dropping their mask", so to speak – which is funny because that's exactly what happened. Both of them let go of the burdens of their past lives to fully enjoy their new ones. Everybody involved is all the better for it (the only thing the God of Death ever done right, lol).

But here's the interesting bit. While the Henituses never find out, there are other characters who do.

First comes Choi Han, who practically speaking got "spoiled" by the God of Death himself. He gets the memories of his relative Choi Jung Soo, Cale's long dead best friend. Seeing KRS in those memories Choi Han easily puts the two and two together, as Cale never really changed personality-wise from his old life (especially his desire for slacker life, hahaha!).

Immediately after Choi Han finds out, Cale tells Raon as well, as he was present while everything was going down and the curious Dragon wanted to understand. Cale's explanation of his transmigration to Raon was extremely short, but very sweet.

Third, there was Alberu, who found out during the Sealed God's Test – which is a whole huge plotline which is too complicated to explain in detail right now, so keep things short, Cale was put into his old 20-year-old body to re-experience his biggest trauma, and both Choi Han and Alberu got to join him there to help him out. Alberu did not recognize Cale immediately, but he saw him using his Ancient Powers, so he put it together quickly as well.

Then followed one of the most hilarious yet heartwarming exchanges between the two, as Alberu realized that whatever was going on put Cale in a very vunerable position, so he sincerely offered to hear him out. Then Cale, with his usual subtlety of a rampaging elephant, info dumps about his and Choi Han's dimension travellers status. Alberu's reaction is one of the funniest moments in the book for me.

Shortly after, there was Lee Soo Hyuk in the Sealed God's Test, Cale's old Team Leader, whom Cale decided to tell the truth before he went back to the fantasy world; as it turned out that there was a younger KRS inside the same body all along, and he wanted someone to know the truth why he was acting differently all of a sudden.

So Choi Han, Raon, Alberu and Lee Soo Hyuk from Earth 2 were the characters who found out about Cale's transmigration (and also the KRS from Earth 2, but I'm not sure if we count him....? Let's say he counts). But I said earlier, Part 2 is still ongoing... And it looks like Ron and Beacrox Molan will found out soon.

Why? Because they joined in on one of Cale's dimension trips, and with Cale changing his appearance accordingly, they seem to be finally putting it together why Cale's personality suddenly changed overnight 2 years ago. They've seen enough clues, and they're not stupid. The conversation about it seems to be put on hold right now, however, but I'm pretty sure it's going to happen sooner or later.

If things happens as I predict, then that will be full 7 characters (aside from OG Cale, Earth 1's CJS & LSH, and various gods) who know about Cale. Seeing as Cale is allergic to explanations, I doubt anyone else will found out any time soon, lol.

I hope this helps!

[kuramirocket]

@devotion-that-corrupts Okay a new post because I have thoughts about finishing Sunrise.

In regards to Hollyleaf herself revealing the secret; I mean I can understand her rage, confusion and despair. The Warrior Code was so integral to her belief system and worldview, so I don't really find it all that surprising, psychologically speaking, that it shattered everything for her and it caused her to reveal everything at the gathering and runaway where she was ultimatley killed in the collapse of the tunnels. She just could not deal with it mentally and emotionally.

I would have loved to see what her thoughts would have been had she known another medicine cat existed who too had kits. It's too bad Hollyleaf was too angry and shattered to talk to Leafpool or Squirrelflight or even Firestar as clan leader. I wonder if Firestar would have told her about Yellowfang, though revealing that secret after so long doesn't seem likely, maybe.

I also find it hard to believe Hollyleaf died. Sure, Firestar has other kin besides Hollyleaf and her siblings, but I always got the impression the prophecy talked about three siblings specifically not necessarily different kin relations (e.g. two siblings, a cousin) if that makes sense. The prophecy being about Lionblaze, Jayfeather and one of the newly born kits just seems pretty out of left field. Though, I suppose it would explain why Hollyleaf didn't seem to have any special powers. Hmm... Just Hollyleaf dying seems convienant and lacking closure to everything.

Also, I know Hollyleaf and her siblings are extremely young and inexperienced and lack wisdom and life experience, but they were so unfair, especially Hollyleaf towards Leafpool and Squirrelflight. I know, they were shocked to say the least about the reveal and it was a great burden for them to bear along with the secret of the prophecy and it shook everything they thought they knew about themselves and everyone around them, but Leafpool and Squirrelflight are only 'human' for lack of a better phrase. Lol. I mean, they're just cats. They, too, will make mistakes and have regerets. Yet, they tried their best and it was obvious they loved Jayfeather, Lionblaze and Hollyleaf. They looked after them and cared for them. Leafpool and Squirrelflight also suffered a great deal and too shouldered a great secret and burden. Though, I can't blame the young cats for being angry with Leafpool and Squirrelflight. They reacted like any young individual would, I think. It's all just a complicated mess. Oof.

So yeah, oooh boy what a way to end Power of Three! Holy cow!

[hornyramostan]

Sergio Ramos x reader;

in which Sergio needs someone to comfort him

tw:self harm

You and Sergio have been dating for a couple years so you knew how was to live with a professional football player. There where a lot of happy times like when he won the champions league with Real Madrid or when he and the spanish team won the world cup, but as much as good times, there are bad times, and Sergio was traversing a bad one.

From a young age, footballers are strongly demanded so that they have a good performance in the matches. To achieve that good performance they have to go trough a lot of training, and that not only wears you physically but mentally. And that was something you hated so much. It seems like people, or even their own coaches and leaders did not know that mental health is exactly as important as physical health. You were tired of seeing him criying from stress after practices or before matches, because yes, players change A LOT when they're not on the field, and that was huge noticeable on Sergio.

On the field he was agressive, violent, rude and he was going to do everything he can to make his team won, but off the field he was the most loving, affectionate, protective, funny, friendly and sensitive person. People think that just because how he is on the pitch he has no emotions, but he has.

You knew that a few years ago he used to cut himself. You saw the marks one time and the idea of him doing it again tormented you. But multiple times he told you that he wasn't going to do it again, until that day.

You were back home after an exausting day at work. "I'm here!" You said closing the front door. After not hearing any response You exclaim again "Hello? Sergio? Babe? Are you at home?" Again, no one answered and you started to panic. Quickly, you went upstairs and went to the room the both of you shared. You were checking the place until you realized that the bathroom door was closed and there was someone inside, since a fine line of light escaped from under the door. Without much tought, you headed to the door and started to try to open it. "Sergio honey are you in there?" At this point, desperation had taken control of your voice and it began to crack. "Sergio babe open the door please honey i'm here" No response "SERGIO OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR" That scream full of fear, anxiety and panic, was enough for you boyfriend to Open the door. What you saw was nightamare. Your boyfriend, the love of your life was covered in blood because of the cuts he had in his arms an inner thighs. "Y/n i can explain it, i- just-" "no sergio oh my god what happened love why didn't you call me for gods sake look at you oh no no" That's when you started to cry. How didn't you notice how bad he was?

"C'mon, let me take care of you" You raised your hand in a signal for him to grab it and guide him to where you had the first-aid kit with the necessary things to cure him. You sit him down on the bed and grab his arm. With a cotton ball with hydrogen peroxide, you cleaned his cuts "Auch" He complained "Sorry" You said. You keep cleaning and bandaging his cuts, starting with the arms and continuing with the legs. At all time he kept his eyes on you. You didn't see them, but you felt them, you felt his starring gaze on your hands.

When you finished, you raised your head and looked into his eyes. "Why?" Silence. "Sergio why didn't you told me what was happening?" "I, i don't know. It all happened so fast. Lately it seems that the world is against me, I am doing badly in training, the press and television programs do not stop saying things about me, I feel that nobody understands me, that nobody can put up with me" "Sergio, my love, you know you can count with me, ALWAYS at any moment at any time. Please please please don't you ever feel like a burden to me or anyone. I want you to know that you are the most important thing that i got and i love you so so much, so please honey never do this again, and when you feel like you need to do it, call me or tell this to a close friend, anyone you like, but i want you to know that you will never be alone"

Sergio bursted into tears. You've seen him cry, yes, but never like that. He seemed to be venting after a long time suppressing his emotions. Carefully, you brought him to your chest where he quickly snuggled up. You started caressing his back as you settled on the bed.

After a long while, you stopped hearing crying and heard your boyfriend's voice "Thank you y/n, thank you for listening and thank you for taking care of me. I love you so much" Sergio was lying on top of you hugging you around the waist with his head on your chest while you caressed his hair. "It's nothing love, I will always be here for you" And just like that, you both fell asleep in each other's arms.

HII

i wanted to do one with this topic because i think mental health in profesional players (of any sport) isn't talked about enough.

i hope you like it and remember, you will never be alone ❤️

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[denrukatheblogger]

QSMP Rambling (Tallulah and Chayenne)

(Main context: QSMP is a multilingual minecraft multiplayer server with streamers playing and I specifically follow Philza but watch clips and read happenings from other streamers)

Good god help me I was going to just enjoy philza's qsmp portion of the stream but then apparently lore stuff happened and now the eggs are clashing. (I rambled way too much, so I'm putting it below oops)

Though the lore stuff is not something I dislike, my mind immediately honed in more on how the two eggs I watched QSMP for mostly ended up. Tbh, I started watching QSMP because I saw clips and animatics connecting Chayenne to Techno and then I think I started officially watching Wilbur's streams when Tallulah happened. Not immediately, but it was either the 2nd or 3rd stream with her.

Chayenne was one of the outgoing eggs, picking fights and jumping off of the wall his dads made a home on. Tallulah was the youngest at the time, I think, and was mostly sweet, gentle, loved flowers and music. Chayenne was one of the first eggs and iirc only 4 of the og batch remain. Wilbur left after making sure Philza could care for Tallulah, and Chayenne ended up needing to do the same considering he was the older kid that had more experience.

And then things got worse for the eggs. The code monsters, the kidnapping as people or groups organized shit, and then the eggs left thinking they would be protecting their parents after being threatened.

Chayenne ends up as one of, if not the main, leader of the eggs. Tallulah was known by most as "not a fighter". Needed to protect and needed to be protected respectively. Their dynamic was almost always like this. Chayenne was cared for by his dads of course, but Missa has irl stuff to do and Philza needed to give Tallulah more attention since she needed help. Tallulah has been missing her father for months now- even if the server cared for her, she wasn't their special person. She felt like someone that needed pity and was given it- not like as if they would've cared otherwise...

I'm going all over the place but despite it somewhat feeling sudden how they acted in the recent stream, I feel like I can understand mostly what was going on with them switching in choices. Tallulah used to want love and peace- she's tired of being "useless" and a "burden" for not being able to fight. Chayenne used to be one of the reckless eggs- he's exhausted from being given most of the responsibility whenever they're in danger.

He's tired from all of the action. She's tired from all the inaction.

Chayenne wants to fucking rest for once in his life, meanwhile Tallulah wants to actually help fighting for once in her life.

They got separated before/during Purgatory.

Tallulah had to survive with Dapper and Ramon who seemed to be closer friends with each other and Tallulah maybe envied their bond. But they're still siblings and so she cares deeply about Dapper being kept hostage right now. She frustrated over bonds people get to have because she can't connect with them when she doesn't even have a real pillar to stand on. Missed her dad so much that even with the family he left her with, she doesn't feel like she belongs. She just wants her dad back with her but she's changed. She's scared. She wants to be useful and actually do something so that people don't see her as a weakling anymore.

Chayenne was perceived as one of the stronger eggs. He had to keep calm and focus on keeping everyone safe. He was stuck for however long without even knowing if Tallulah was still alive. He was cared for by Phil and Missa and then Missa needed to leave while Phil had to figure out how to take care of Tallulah with Chayenne. He wouldn't necessarily blame his dads, but a kid wants attention. A kid would love to feel special care from their parents more. But no, Chayenne needed to push aside his wants because others need more care and protection. Maybe not intentionally forced by others into the leader role, but he got into the role and people listened, so people started perceiving him as the one in charge if things happened to the eggs. But it's not like he's immune from all the bullshit they've been going through just because he's not acting out like some others. He's been carrying a heavy weight on his shoulders by staying in the protector role. He loves his siblings and wants them safe, but he's tired and wants to be cared for back instead of simply being looked up to as a leader. He doesn't want pure idolization or criticisms in doing his "job"- he just. He needs a break.

Philza, god bless him, the man's gotta deal with all this bullshit happening on the island while still caring for his eggs. The kids say he's a wonderful dad while Phil says he's been shit at it if he didn't notice them feeling this way or not caring sooner. He does care, but Rose told him he needed to recover his lost courage for a reason. He's understandably terrified of everything that could kill the eggs, that could kill or take him away from being able to be with his kids again, but he needs to regain the confidence he once had in himself to be able to face things stronger too. But that's... It feels bad saying things like that.

Like father like son, I guess. They both just want to rest. But Tallulah's tired of being given rest. That's what most people seem to tell her to do while everyone else goes off to do all the important shit. She can't do the important things because she "can't" fight. She's changed. Chayenne's change. God, Philza's changed from what the Ender King and Rose saw of him before QSMP.

I don't know a solution for this, I don't think a solution could be easily made when there are factors outside of this family's control affecting them. I know they talked it out by the end, but I'm still worried yet intrigued by how things might continue on. The dynamic between the two eggs just tickles my brain in the fun way. I don't think I tend to focus so hard on things that aren't my own OCs- usually I take what happens in a thing and use it as inspiration for my own stuff. But these two are just... I want them to be okay in the end. I want to see Tallulah being allowed to be the strong badass she wants to prove herself to be while still accepting that people care for her in a way that they'd be willing to risk a lot for her too. I want to see Chayenne being allowed to relax, to take the backseat and have fun while not needing to worry about shit messing up their entire lives. I want to see Philza being able to take the kids on adventures and just being able to have a good time with them without the terror of everything threatening their damn lives.

I want for them to be okay and they're trying. Damn it, they're trying as much as they can to be okay for everyone else too.

[all-the-fun-of-the-cirkus]

okay, so.

waltz.

rarely have i watched an episode and immediately come here to talk about, but i have a lot of thoughts i need to get out

so firstly, the title. obviously a callback to duet from the first series (still the best single chunk of star trek i've seen yet). that one was a two-hander between kira and marritza, the former already having condemned the cardassian and the latter struggling to work through what he did in the occupation, and this is the same with sisko and dukat. except marritza felt genuine remorse, accepted he was wrong, and that's what dukat can never do

he's awful, i know, but he's a fantastic character, because he is a character. he has a sense of humour, soft spots, humanising (so to speak) moments, he's a real, fleshed out person, who just happens to be, as sisko says, true evil. and that works because he truly, genuinely believes he isn't. and what's more, he needs everyone to see that too. we saw that with his relationship with kira, his banter with sisko, his constant bemoaning that the bajorans didn't accept him, it wasn't just posturing, or pr, he genuinely needs to be liked, and he can't understand why people don't, because as far as he's concerned, as people so often point out, he's the hero of the story in his own mind, and he can't be wrong

that's played out superbly in his hallucinations here; weyoun is his cold and clinical side, dumar his arrogance and pride, kira his doubt and self-loathing, and they criticise and needle him throughout, but in the end, crucially, they're all telling him the exact same thing - what he really thinks

and what he wants to hear is that he's the good guy, which is where the political metaphor gets interesting. this whole time i've interpreted the occupation of bajor as a holocaust allegory, obviously, the cardassians are the nazis, bajorans jews. and that is of course a big part of it, but the connection i didn't make until now is the british empire

dukat's big speech is fully "white man's burden," the bajorans as savages centuries behind cardassia, following backwards religion, no technology, who clearly needed civilising by their superiors, bringing into the light, and dukat was the kind father helping guide them into the light. and he really believes it's for the best! he tells himself he doesn't despise them, that he doesn't want to wipe them off the face of the galaxy, it's their fault for being too stupid to appreciate him, to see what he's trying to do for them, how he only wants to help them if they'd only stop resisting and submit to those who know better than they do

part of this is that he insists that he's "one of the good ones," that another prefect would have been harsher, crueler. and this is where it gets interesting, because he's probably right. a leader who didn't care about being liked might have killed more bajorans, worked them harder, starved them more, executed them more. dukat may, indeed, have been the lesser of the evils, and that's not really in dispute. what's really compelling about this is that the story never lets this be an excuse. so death rates dropped by 20%? that's great! why didn't they drop by 100%? so labour camp output dropped by 50%? cool, you were still keeping people in labour camps and enslaving them

and i find that uncomfortably compelling in the current climate. i'm not american, but i see full well what's going on there, and it disgusts me. because there's several genocides going on right now, and i'm going to focus on palestine, because the democrats are gleefully funding that genocide and protecting its perpetrators from any repercussions, brutally coming down on any protests. and when people understandably say "hey what the fuck," they remember there's an election this year and go "well is the republicans were in power this genocide would be way worse! you gotta pick the lesser of two evils!" and you know what? they're right! the genocide would probably worse if the republicans were in power! but the democrats committing a less-bad genocide doesn't mean they aren't still committing genocide! because the lesser of two evils is still evil, and sometimes there's no shade of grey