#like they gave me such bad anxiety i get so hot and red and like get a little buzzy in my ears... yknow casual things

[sluttyten]

🥶

[seeingivy]

historic wins

actor!eren x f!reader

**part of my method acting series

content: mentions of implied SA/uncomfortable agent, nothing else too serious. reader has anxiety before performing, eren being sick in love, baddie moment

an: when I tell you writing this chapter took ten years of my life, it really did. i literally had the worst day ever regardless BUT i regurgitated out and i can't tell if i hate it bc my mood is bad or bc its actually bad if its bad let all just collectively close our eyes please bc it ACTUALLY gave me a tension headache FDSFDSF

previous chapter

--

You knock on the door, the stress sitting on your shoulders, as you hear rustling behind the frame. When it swings open, you’re met with Marco and Reiner answering the doors, the two of them swiftly pulling you in and slamming the door shut behind you. 

“Did anyone see you when you came in?” Reiner asks, his hand still pulling you up the stairs. 

“No. Was-is there someone there or-”

“Paparazzi. They’ve been swarming since yesterday, we've barely been able to leave as it is.” Marco responds. 

They drag you up the stairs and both push open the first white door open. You’re met with five pairs of eyes staring you down. Eren, Connie, Mikasa, Ymir, and Historia - who looks downright horrible. 

You figured it was bad. You had seen the headlines on your way down - saying Historia was canceled, her trending on Twitter, her socials getting blocked. And you always thought that situations like this were sensationalized when you weren't famous, something horrible to go through. But it’s worse than you expected.

She looks sick. 

Her complexion is pale green, her eyes rimmed red, and her hair is tangled into such a mess at the top of her head that it’s making your stomach turn.

The Historia you know - glimmering blue eyes, soft blow-dried hair - is no comparison to the downright ghost you’re looking at now. And the worst part of it all is her expression.

Broken. Defeated. Crushed. 

You walk forward, opening your arms for her to sink into, and she immediately breaks out into sobs. She’s crying into your shoulder, her salty tears making a home against your skin and her cries so loud they're giving you goosebumps. You can see the rest of them behind you - Mikasa and Ymir sharing a knowing look - as Historia lets go and crawls back into the middle of her bed. 

You take a seat next to Eren on the floor, the two of you crisscrossed against her pale pink walls. He links his hand with yours as you plop your head onto his shoulder. 

“Is that everyone?” 

“Yeah, Hisu. The rest of them couldn’t get off and Levi and Hange are on their way now.” Ymir responds, her hands making small circles into her back. 

“Okay. I-I appreciate you coming, even when everyone hates me right now.” 

“We could never hate you, Hisu. Ever.” Eren responds the tone definitive, angry, and firm. It only occurs to you now that you’ve never really seen Eren like this - his shoulders tensed up, the look in his eyes burning hot instead of softly warm. 

“I know, I just-”

“No one could ever make us change our mind about you, Historia. The shit they’re saying doesn’t even sound like you. Why would you randomly fire your agent when you’ve literally loved him for years?” Reiner responds. 

Historia’s face pales at the mention of her agent, the reaction catching all of you off guard. Eren pulls his arm around your shoulder as you both slump farther down the wall, the anticipation, the anxiety of what Historia’s about to say so palpable it makes your throat dry. 

“I did fire my agent.” Historia chokes out. 

You remember her agent well, from when you met him at the season two premiere. He was a tall guy, with chocolate brown hair and a fair amount of wrinkles. He couldn’t be much older than your own parents, but he was always the biggest supporter of Historia. The first person in line to brag about her, about how amazing her career has been, how many credits she has for how old she is. 

“Why?” Connie asks. 

Historia takes a deep breath, her head in her hands and her voice shaky as she starts explaining. 

“I was set to act in Endless Love, that big movie being produced at the end of winter. I had gotten the lead role and I found out on my birthday, while I was still filming that limited series. I-I threw a big party to celebrate the fact that I was turning eighteen, that I was getting my dream roles, that my work was finally coming to fruition and-” 

She pauses, leaning back on her bed as she screeches it out of her voice. And what she says hangs in the air, making your head feel like solid metal. 

“The party ended and he was…congratulating me on everything. And I told him that I appreciated everything he had done for me, how far he had helped me come. And when-when I said that, he said…if I was really grateful, I’d give him a kiss.” 

You pause, the implication sticking in your mind. Eren had hinted it to you before. That people in the industry take advantage, that they’re so powerful, so successful that it makes them feel entitled, deserving of whatever it is they please. 

“I fired him. He went on Twitter, made a few tweets about my character when the news broke and you know how he is. They’re-they’re dragging my name through the mud. Calling me spoiled, that I paid to get the roles that I had, calling me names, sending me death threats and I-”

“You don’t have to worry about that. Levi and Hange will be here any minute and you know they’ve had their fair share of this. Hange especially and they’ll know what to do and-” Ymir starts. 

“This is career-ruining. I didn’t do anything- anything at fucking all and my career is over if I tell the truth. I have to stay quiet, put my head down, and take it all if I still want to do this and I do.” 

You all sit quietly, head down as she pants, the words angrily spilling out of her mouth. The words hang in the air, the silence deafening. Because what do you even say to that? 

Can you really compromise your own feelings for the sake of your career? Your art? 

“Okay, Historia. Let’s talk, just us, okay?” 

You all turn your heads to find Levi and Hange leaning against the doorframes, Erwin standing at the back too. You all stand up, Historia running first to Hange and the rest of you following suit. You and Eren reach for Levi first, squeezing him way too hard. Levi ruffles both of your hair as you look up at him, a soft smile pressed against his face. 

“Okay, run off. Let us talk to Historia first, okay?” 

You both nod, letting go of Levi as you walk down the hall. 

“Levi?”

“Hm, Y/N?” 

“I missed you.” 

“Don’t be corny, brat.” Levi responds, glaring at you. You smile back and he most definitely murmurs something that sounds like I miss you too as you and Eren walk out. 

- 

The lot of you settle for milling around the kitchen, Mikasa talking Ymir down from her hill of rage in the back. You can’t help but watch Eren in the back corner, leaning against the counter with his eyes fixed on the outside. 

There’s a group of stormy, angry-looking gray clouds simmering in the air above, the grass outside lush and green. It’s positively gloomy, the weather matching the storm brewing in all of your heads. 

Eren flicks his eyes over at you, making a gesture for the two of you to go outside. You nod, setting down your phone as you walk over to him, the two of you sliding open the side door and walking out onto the pavement. Historia’s house opens up onto a nice green field, surrounded by lush, flowery hills. 

He’s walking faster than you, his long legs carrying him to the closest slope. When the breeze picks up, it’s moving through your hair strongly and sending a shiver down your spine with it. 

“Are you cold?” 

“Just a little, Eren. I didn’t realize it would be this cold outside.” 

He immediately shrugs off his dark green hoodie, the one you’ve seen a hundred times, and yanks it over your head. He’s placing it over your head haphazardly and you can hear him laughing at your protests. 

“You know, you could have at least aimed for my head when you yanked it on me.” 

“Be quiet. Let’s sit.” 

He plops down onto the grass, lying flat against the flowers as you join him. You’re both watching the clouds swirl above, the blades of grass whistling in the wind against your hands. 

“This is lying down, Eren.” 

“Oh, shut up. Do you always have to talk back?” 

You turn your head to the side, looking into his eyes. 

“Maybe a little bit.”

He rolls his eyes, turning his head back to the sky. You can tell he’s more tense than usual, his jaw clenched against his skull and his eyebrows knit in irritation. 

“Are you okay, Eren? You've seemed off today and-” 

“Quit asking me that!” 

You’re thrown off by the immediate rejection, the tone in his voice so angry it nearly makes you flinch. You can feel your skin burning - in embarrassment and humiliation for asking him something stupid-

His hand comes down on yours, squeezing three times, as he shifts over to face you. You follow suit, the two of you lying on your sides, face to face with your interlocked hands in between you. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I-I’m not mad at you. Marco and Connie, they’ve just been asking all day and I’m okay and it’s just getting tiring to-” 

“It’s okay.” 

“No, it’s not. I-I can never be mad at you, I just-just got frustrated for a second, but never at you.”

You lift your hand, placing it on his ice-cold cheek, and squeeze once. 

“It’s okay, Eren. I know,” you whisper. 

He gives you a smile, closing his eyes as he leans his head against the flowers. They’re pale yellow and you silently wonder if they’re as soft as Eren’s skin feels under your hand. 

“I’m not okay, Y/N.” he whispers. 

“Want to tell me about it?” 

“I-I have a brother.” 

“Zeke. I remember, Eren.” 

“We-we don’t really get along anymore, but I loved him when I was a kid. He was always so cool - driving me around in his car to get ice cream, teaching me tricks on all the video games I used to play, and acting in all these really cool shows. But, he-he” 

You place a hand on his shoulder, moving it back and forth and trying your best to comfort him into talking. Eren was always the worst with words. 

“He had a scandal like this. And then he started talking to all these big producers, acting differently all of a sudden. He stopped talking to me all together after it all happened and only to my parents when he needed something. Even to this day, he’s come back from what happened but he was never the same. And I-” 

“That’s not going to happen to Historia, Eren. Don’t think like that.” 

He leans forward, dragging you into his embrace, as he digs his face into the crook of your neck. You bring your hands up, dragging him through the tresses of his brown hair as he squeezes harder. 

“It just-I got iced out by him. I wanted to be around him, wanted to be him and he just stopped talking to me all together. I loved him so much and I-

“Eren. Historia loves you. She’s not going to ice you or any of us out from this because she’s not like that. None of us will. And maybe your brother had a reason for what he did.” 

You and Eren stay like that for a few minutes, the words hanging in the air between you. You can feel your chest stinging at Eren’s words, his stress from the situation making more sense now. You curse the fact that Eren might have been dealing with something like death threats, people spewing hatred before he was old enough to even understand what it meant. 

“Hey. You’re supposed to be on my side, Y/N.” 

“This is being on your side. Sometimes that means being a devil's advocate a little bit, Eren.” 

He rolls his eyes as he readjusts and you can’t help but stare at them. His eyes. Bottle green, with specks of darker shades in the middle. Like a clear ocean or a shiny gem, glittering even in the dull light of the clouds. 

“What are you thinking, Y/N?”

“Your eyes have lots of colors, Eren. Pretty greens.” 

“Pretty?” 

“Pretty.”

He smiles, bringing a hand up to your cheek, his thumb tracing the shape of your lips. You can feel your body burning at the touch, at his eyes, at his smell all over you. 

“Eren. What are you do-” 

“Do you ever think about how we live in a fishbowl?” 

“A fishbowl?” 

“Like an aquarium. We’re fish on display, that everyone gets to point at and laugh at and enjoy. And then one day, when they don’t like us, they put their rods out and wring us out.” 

“I guess, Eren. Why do you-” 

“I like being a fish with you.” 

You lean back, squinting your eyes at him.

“You like being a fish with me?” 

“I just mean- that I- I like” 

“You think I smell like a fish, Eren.” 

“What? I didn’t say that- oh my god, I just meant that we’re two fishes swimming together and-” 

“The plural of fish is fish. Not fishes.” 

Eren rolls his eyes, getting up off the grass to tackle you in the grass, pinning you down by your arms to hover over you. He’s smirking at you, his lips only a few feet from yours. 

“You’re annoying, Y/N. I was trying to be cute.” 

“Let me go. Is this how you treat your fellow fish?” 

“Shut up. We’re not fish together anymore because you’re rude.” 

He gets up off of you, plopping back into the grass next to you. You’re both laughing, your cheeks hurting from smiling so hard and the blood rushing to your head. 

“I’m just teasing, Eren. The whole fish thing is cute.” 

“Now you’re just saying that so I’ll stop being mad at you.” 

“Hey! I get what you’re saying. It’s like…we’re fish. People stare and talk and whatever and it sucks. And no one really understands what it’s like to be a fish, even when they’re staring at us through the glass, but you do. They’ll always be something between us and them, but you and I are always on the same side. We-we have each other.” 

He smiles, bringing his hand back up on the back of your neck and pulling you closer to his face. When he talks, he whispers, the breath tickling your skin. 

“So if you got the fish thing why were you giving me so much attitude about it?” 

“I have to keep you in line, Eren. You can’t have all the cards.” 

“I don’t even have one, Y/N. Not even one when it comes to you.” 

He smiles, his eyes shut as he leans forward to press his lips to yours. But before he can, his phone starts buzzing behind him and he leans back, the two of you awkwardly scrambling off of each other. 

The moment passed. 

“Reiner. This better be something fucking good.” 

“What? Okay, we’re coming back now. Oh my god.” 

Eren stands up, holding out a hand to you. You place your hand in his and he nearly yanks you up, the two of you running downhill back to the house. 

“What-what happened?” 

“The TV awards. They announced the nominations.” 

- 

When you both run back in, Reiner and Marco immediately drag you to the center couch, next to Historia who's crying puddles and Ymir who's holding her like there’s no tomorrow. 

“Hisu got a nomination. Despite this shit.” Reiner says, smiling. 

You and Eren smile at each other too, piling onto Ymir and Historia, and squeezing hard. A win. 

When the program starts again, you’re all staring intently at the screen, you and Eren anxiously fumbling with each other’s hands as you wait for it. They’ve announced almost all of them, except the major acting ones which are the only ones you and Eren could really be nominated for. 

“Speaking of historic nominations, lead actor for hit series Attack on Titan, Eren Jaeger, has garnered three nominations - including a major six category for Actor in a Lead Role. He is the youngest person to be nominated for this award.” 

You turn your head, squeezing the entire circulation out of Eren’s hand as the realization sinks in. Actor in a Lead Role. Like Eren’s lifelong dream, Actor in a Lead Role. You reach forward, tangling your arms around his neck as Reiner and Mikasa pile on too, the three of you nearly strangling him by the way you’re shaking him. 

“Okay, okay let me go. You’re going to kill me before I can even go to the show and lose.” 

“Shut up. You’re so winning.” 

He rolls his eyes at you both keep watching the lady, announcing the costume design and casting awards. 

“And finally, our record-breaking announcement. Lead actress for the hit series Attack on Titan, Y/N L/N, has broken history by being our most nominated actress in Institute history. Including nominations for the ensemble cast, she has garnered five nominations, including two major six categories for Actress in a Lead Role and Breakout Actress. She is the first non-SHWA affiliated actress and the youngest to ever do so.” 

Eren drops the remote and turns to you, cupping your face in his hands and dragging your face as close as he can to his. 

“Are you fucking kidding me? You-you’re insane. You just-” 

He nearly leans forward, pressing your lips together for the second time in the past twenty minutes, but Marco and Mikasa cut him off before you can, the two of them jostling you from his embrace to squish you in a hug. You give Eren an apologetic look, which he shakes his head at. 

They’re all squishing you so hard - Levi and Hange pressing kisses to the top of your head and Historia squeezing the life out of all of you - but all you can think about is one thing. Eren, standing a few feet away from you, smiling at you like you’re the sun. 

It only occurs to you then and there.

That you’re in love with Eren Jaeger. 

-  

You guys leave on your press tour two weeks later, meeting up in New York. You have a full day of interviews for the pre-awards show the day before and then you’re all going to fly out to Los Angeles together and attend the awards. 

Not only are you nominated for six awards - which you still haven’t wrapped your head around - you’re also performing at the show. Your agent had reached out to you a few days after the nominations list went out and mentioned that you were listed to perform at the show. 

You hacked it out with Eren. You’d play the piano and perform New Year’s Day, the song you wrote together last year on your birthday, and be done with it. It’s the song you have the most practice working on since the rest of your songs are half-baked. 

But now that you’re doing press, you barely have any time to practice - being stuck between interviews all day. You shake the thought from your head as you and Eren clip your microphone jacks to each other’s shirts before walking onto the stage and standing in view. 

“My name is Eren Jaeger and I’m one of the leads of Attack on Titan.” 

“My name is Y/N L/N and I’m the other lead of Attack on Titan. We’re going to be taking a Friendship Test today!” 

Around halfway through the interview, the crew brings you and Eren little notepads and pens, instructing you guys to compliment each other. You scribble a few thoughts down as you and Eren stand on the stage, now facing each other. 

“Okay, you first, Eren.” 

Eren flips the notepad in his hands, awkwardly fumbling with his fingers when he does. When he looks up, his green eyes are awkwardly meeting yours. 

“Jeez, Eren. I didn’t realize it would be this hard for you to compliment me.” 

“Shut up. I was just thinking about how to start.” 

“More like thinking of what to say.” 

“Be quiet.” 

“Okay, okay. Compliment me, Jaeger.” 

He rolls his eyes, giving you a smile as he runs his eyes over the notepad. He seems much more at ease now, the awkwardness from before coming off in waves. 

“Y/N. I am the most stubborn person on the planet. Which only speaks volumes about how patient, understanding, and compassionate you really are for being my best friend.” 

You can feel your throat getting dry and your eyes welling with tears at literally the first sentence, taken aback by how sincere Eren’s being. The soft eyes, the one he only reserves for when he’s lying down on hills or writing songs with you on the piano are out in the flesh, and they’re making your heart pound so much you’re sweating under the lights. 

“You’ve always been able to sense my feelings - my happiness, my frustrations, my pain - without me having to tell you. And you always, always know how to say the right thing to bring me back down to Earth from it all. You make me a better person and I love you for it.”  

You can feel the tears streaming down your eyes as reach up to wipe your tears away, knowing you’re smudging the makeup your team spent hours on. 

“You’re not terrible to look at either.” 

He smiles into the camera on the side and you can feel the tears spilling from your eyes, your nose filling with snot. 

“Eren.” 

“Told you it was good.” 

“Shut up. That was so sweet, I didn’t even know you knew half of those words, let alone what they mean.” 

Eren reaches forward, rolling his eyes at you as he squishes your cheeks. 

“I literally just called you the best person I know and you’re still being annoying?” 

“Yes. It’s a full-time job.” 

He turns to the camera, moving your squished face towards the camera with him. 

“Do you guys see what I have to deal with? My girl is literally the most stubborn person on the planet.” 

“Didn’t you call me infinitely patient five seconds ago?”  

You both stand back on your marks as you wipe your tears, reaching forward to hold Eren’s hand. You squeeze three times, which he returns with another three squeezes, before you take your own notepad and read your compliment out to Eren. 

“Eren. I wouldn’t be standing here if it wasn’t for you. Not only because you took a chance on me after our first screen test, but every other hiccup along the way was only something I could swallow because of you. You-your steadfast determination and belief in me is something so inspiring, so warm unlike anything else. You’ve always been a safe place for me, somewhere I can always run to when I need someone. I’m so glad we can always be fish together.” 

Eren smiles at the fish line, leaning forward to crush you in a hug. You can smell the clean laundry smell on his shirt, breathing it in as you soak in Eren’s embrace around you. 

“Hey Y/N.” 

“Hey Eren.” 

“I love you.” 

“Yeah, yeah. I love you too, Eren.” 

After the interview is over, you and Eren are stuck on this stage for another hour before the rest of the cast comes to do another interview. You both stay in the back, near the snack table and run through the song again.

“Eren.” 

“Hm?”

“I don’t know why I got signed up to perform at this thing. I-I don’t think I’m ready to perform this song yet.” 

“You are. New Year’s Day is a great song and you’re an amazing singer. Plus, the person you wrote the song about is really attractive, so that helps your case too.” 

You reach forward to flick his cheek. 

“Shut up. New Year’s Day is not about you.” 

“I’m literally your inspiration. You literally wrote a love song about me.” 

“You wish, Eren.” 

“I don’t have to. I can see it written all over your face, sweetheart.” 

“Sweetheart? When did you become so cocky?” 

“When did you become so beautiful?” 

“Eren.” 

“Y/N.” 

You’re both cut off by one of the crew members, a shorter, older woman standing near the table with her eyes fixed on you. She smiles when you guys both turn towards her, extending her out. 

“Hi. My name is Le-”

“Leila. I remember. You helped us fix the microphone packs before we started!” you respond. 

“Oh. Yes, Leila. I can’t believe you remembered that. I-I was going to ask you for a favor if that’s okay.” 

“Sure. We’d love to help however we can.” 

“My daughter. She’s a really, really big fan of the show. I was wondering if we could take a picture together so we could send it to her.” 

You smile, gesturing to Eren to stand up with you as you take a picture with her. You and Eren are both taller than her so you put your hands around her shoulders and muster the biggest smiles you can for the picture.

“Are you sure you didn’t want us to make a video of us saying hi to her or anything? Or maybe call her if she’s free? If there’s a paper here we can sign something as well or anything you want.” you ask. 

“Oh, I couldn’t impose. You guys have been so kind already and-” 

“Nonsense. Eren and I are just going to sit here and I’d really love to help make her day. You work so hard day and night on these sets for us and make sure everything works by the time we get here and we really, really appreciate it.” 

You and Eren end up filming a video for her daughter since she’s already asleep so you can’t call her, and you and Eren also sign a few posters for her to take home to her daughter. 

“Y/N. Just so you know, you’re amazing. My daughter was so inspired when you signed yourself up to perform at the awards show after you openly talked about how nervous it makes you. You actually gave her the courage to sign up for a dance team at her school and she actually made it on the team now. My point is you’re a big inspiration to everyone and the strides you’re making for all of us don’t go unnoticed.” 

She gives you both one last hug as she runs off back to the other side of the set, giving you a smile as she leaves. Eren brings his hand around your shoulder, leaning forward as he smiles at you. 

“You hear that, Y/N? You’re an inspiration.”

“It’s weird to hear that, Eren. I remember being that kid watching Hange win on the screen when I was little. And if I win-” 

“When. When you win.” 

“If I win, it’s weird to think that I could be that for someone else.” 

“You’ve always been that way. People are just noticing it now.” 

“Do you have to sign yourself up to sing for the awards, by the way? Because…I never even told my agent that I had written a song. She just told me that I would be performing and then I started prepping.” 

“Yeah. You have to send a demo for them to accept the performance.” 

You lean back, even more confused than you were before. There’s no demo of New Year’s Day. How could they accept your performance if there’s no record of you singing it? How could they even know you wrote a song when the only person who knows you even finished it was Eren? 

Eren. 

“What did you do?” 

“Hm?” 

“You did something, Eren. What did you do?” 

“I didn’t do anything.” 

“Eren.” 

“Maybe, I took the sheet music and recorded a demo of me singing it. And convinced them that it would sound even better when you did it, because it’s your song.” 

You smack him across the shoulder. 

“You signed me up to sing the song? In public, on live television?” 

“The song is good. You’re a phenomenal singer. And you can’t become a triple threat unless people hear you sing.” 

-   

You stand on the other side of the curtain, shiny and gold, as you readjust your dress one last time. You take a deep breath as you give a smile to Marco and Jean, who are right behind you, squeezing your arms. 

“You’re good. You look great and you’re going to kill it tonight. And Eren just walked out on the carpet so he’ll be right there.” Marco says, smiling brightly at you. 

You nod, giving the two of them a smile back, as you part the curtains and walk out onto the red carpet. You can feel your ankles shaking from the heels you were wearing, making sure to walk slowly so they didn’t tangle with the long, purple billowing fabric of your dress. As you turn to the right, you’re immediately blinded by the flashing lights and the sound of screaming from the photographers on the other side of the red carpet. 

The lights are so blinding that you can feel yourself squinting, trying your hardest to muster a smile with your eyes closed. You can already feel the embarrassment coming on from how these pictures are going to trend later, trying to swallow the lump in your throat. 

“Put these on.” 

You turn to the left to see Eren, his hair messily styled to perfection. He’s holding up sunglasses, a matching pair in his hand as well. You both place them on your nose, garnering a big amount of cheers from the paparazzi as you both pose together, Eren’s hand around your waist. 

“How did you know?” you whisper under your breath. 

“You can barely handle Armin’s Polaroid. You get used to the flashes, but the first time it’s hard to adjust. And this is a big night, so I had to make sure I had a contingency plan.” he says. 

“Always thinking ahead, huh?” 

“Only for you, sweetheart.” 

All you can think about is the awards, the performance, and the anxiety building in your stomach with every passing second. You force a smile as you both walk down the carpet, stopping every few seconds to take pictures and smile. At one point, Eren stands in front of you in the camera, blocking the view. 

“What a picture, Eren. You really want them to get a shot of your ass?” 

“No. Your dress. It’s kind of sliding off the side.” 

You look down, realizing that in all the movement and sweating you’re doing under the lights, that one of the clasps keeping the fabric in place came undone. You quickly tuck the clasp back together and look up to shoot Eren a smile. 

“Thanks. You just saved me from flashing everyone on the carpet.” 

“That doesn’t sound too horrible, doll.” 

You and Eren turn around to find Sukuna and Nobara standing at your side, the two of them wrapping their arms around you and pressing a kiss to your cheeks. Eren immediately yanks Sukuna off, his arm stiff around Sukuna’s shoulder. 

“You never get less annoying, do you?” Eren asks. 

“Not really, no.” 

“You look really pretty, Y/N. We’re really rooting for you, we want you to win.” Nobara says, her hands squeezing yours. 

“Don’t get your hopes up. These types of things are kind of a long shot, Kugi.” 

“We know. Doesn’t stop me from rooting for you though.” 

You smile, leaning to take a picture with her before the four of you walk off to the side, continuing your conversation. 

“Where are Yuu and Maki? I haven’t seen them since they started dating and stopped responding to my texts.” 

Sukuna and Nobara share an awkward look, leaning forward to whisper in your's and Eren’s ears.

“They broke up. Well, just wait. You know the mess they're in is going to find its way to the tabloids somehow.” 

You and Eren cringe as you share a look, thinking about Historia’s scandal from a few weeks ago. You can’t imagine how much worse it must be when it involves the two of them. The intimate details of their relationship being on display.

“You look pretty, doll. Way more confident and self-assured than you were when I met you. It suits you.” 

Eren slithers his hand around your waist, the grip firm, as he responds to Sukuna. 

“She’s always been like that.” 

“Okay, Eren. Pipe down. I’m not about to be swapping saliva with your girl anytime soon. Though you might want to get a move on that, everyone’s going to have their eyes on your girl by the end of the night.” Sukuna says, smirking at Eren. 

“You sound disgusting, Sukuna. Like a pervert.”  Nobara says, rolling her eyes at him. 

“That’s what happened with Yuuta and Maki. Everyone went all gaga for Yuuta after the movie dropped. And after she sings too, Eren’s going to fight to stay afloat over here.” 

“Ignore him, Eren. His neurons are decaying as we speak.” Nobara responds, giving Eren a smile. 

“I’m well aware,” Eren says, giving the two of them a smile as they walk away. 

As Sukuna walks away, Eren only tightens his grip on your waist, literally seething with anger as he turns to you. You can tell he’s burning, that he’s jealous or aggravated like he always is when Sukuna's around, and you put a hand on his shoulder. 

“I hate that guy. So much, Y/N.” 

“You know he just says that because you’re easy to piss off right?” 

“Are you really taking his side?” 

“I’m just saying. You give him a lot to work with when you react like that. You should try to be zen. Like a flower.” 

"I'm so zen right now." 

"There's a vein on your forehead that's pulsating from how hard you're clenching your jaw, Eren. You're more of a cactus than a pretty flower."

Eren rolls his eyes as he drags you into the auditorium, the two of you taking your seats at the front. 

-  

Five awards later - two of which you won - and you’re standing behind the stage ready to puke. You choked out your best acceptance speech when you won Breakout Actress, spilling tears as you spoke, and luckily enough the other award was one you and Eren won together. He carried most of your speech together, though Eren spent most of it raving about you. 

Reiner’s still on stage, doing his acceptance speech for Breakout Actor and you’re ready to annihilate yourself. When you came back out after winning your award, getting ready for the performance, you received the worst news possible. 

You have to play the piano while you sing. You have to play the piano while you sing because the pianist you’ve been practicing with has food poisoning. 

You lie down flat on the ground, the silver dress you just put on, feeling heavy against your skin, weighing you down. 

“Are you okay? Y/N, you’ll be fine, it's just a piano.” 

Marco brings his hands to the side of your face, lifting your head so he can rest it on his lap. You’re totally aware of the fact that Marco’s sitting on this disgusting floor with you, in his expensive ass outfit, because you’re having a meltdown. You make a mental note to thank him for it later. 

“Oh my fucking god, Y/N. Can you believe it? We’re literally breakout stars.”

You look up at Reiner, now having come off the stage with his shiny silver trophy in hand and a huge smile on his face. You give him a weak smile back, the pressure in your head only getting more intense when you realize it’s your turn. Reiner nearly cringes at the sight of you, which you ignore as you flutter your eyes shut. After the ad break, they’re going to roll out a shiny black piano you're expected to play. 

“Get Eren.” Marco says and Reiner gives a swift nod. Reiner leans down to press a kiss to your cheek, whispering good luck, before he runs off into the background. 

Not even thirty seconds later, you’re met with Eren, a third person now sitting on the dirty floor with you with the softest expression on his face. He’s taken both of your hands, pressing your knuckles to his lips as he presses a kiss onto them both. 

“You okay?” 

“The pianist. Has food poisoning. I have to play the New Year’s Day piano, Eren.” 

“You have magic hands. You can do it.” he whispers.

You can feel Marco’s hands in your hair, fixing away the flyaways as you look up at him. Marco nods too and you can feel yourself feeling dizzy. 

“I can’t do it. I can’t sing for the first time and play the piano. I-I can’t do this.” 

"Y/N. Come on. You can do this." 

You can feel the tears burning in your eyes when you meet Eren's bottle green ones, washed over in concern. And you know that it's just a piano, that it's juat a crowd, and that it's a song that you've sang a million times. But the anxiety is as big as a balloon, ready to burst into something ugly the second you walk out there under the lights.

Eren frowns as he looks over at the piano, getting rolled out onto the stage, and the crew awkwardly looking at you splayed out on the ground. They're pointing at their watches, signaling that if you're going to perform, you're going to do it now. And Eren can't let you choke, not when it's this important. So he does the only thing he can think of. 

“I’ll play the piano." 

You sit up and put your hands on his shoulders, squeezing hard on the fabric of his suit. 

"Huh?" 

"I'll sit at the bench with you. Play it for you so you can focus on singing." 

“Really, Eren?” you whisper. 

“Can’t do anything without me, can you?”

You lean forward and press a kiss to his cheek, his face immediately turning pink at the sensation. He holds his hand out and helps you up, his hands leaning forward to fix the folds of your dress. You both stand on the side of the curtains and you’re nearly positive you’re cutting off circulation to both Marco and Eren’s hands as you wait for your cue. 

When you and Eren walk out, taking your seats on the piano bench and adjusting the microphones, you stare at the crowd. There’s a light flashing on you and Eren that’s partially obstructing your vision. You’re staring out at them - two hundred faces you don’t know and half a million watching at home. 

Don’t choke. Don’t choke. Don’t choke. 

It’s only then that Eren stops playing the piano, his hand on his shoulder shaking you. And then you realize now that he had started. Meaning he had played the entire intro waiting for you to sing and you didn’t. That you blanked on stage. He places his hand on your chin, lightly guiding your face to look at his. 

“It's okay. Just you and me. Like we did on set okay?” 

You nod and Eren starts playing the piano again. And before you know it, you’ve choked out the last lyric, and Eren’s holding your hand as you both bow on the stage. You see people cheering, standing up out of their seats as you walk off and you feel like your heart is about to burst out of your chest. When you get off into the curtains, they immediately start yank the microphones off of you two as you reach forward for Eren’s hand. 

“I-I blacked out. Was it bad?” 

“It was amazing. You’re amazing. You-you’re” 

Eren leans forward, wrapping his hands around your neck and pressing his lips to yours. You can still feel people moving around you, setting up things for the closing part of the ceremony, but the only thing you’re paying attention to is Eren. And his lips. And the way he’s pulling you closer like he can’t get enough of you. 

When you pull apart, you’re both panting, smiling at each other, foreheads pressed together. 

“Thank god. If I got cock-blocked from kissing you a third time, I was actually going to commit murder.” 

“You want me so bad,” you say, sarcastically. 

“Obviously.” 

You both smile and turn to the left, to a very smiley Marco staring at you two. And then you cringe, remembering that you and Eren are literally backstage and there are like seven people who just watched you suck face in public. Marco walks up, wrapping his arms around both of you and hugging hard. 

“I love you guys.” 

“Marco. Don’t-” Eren starts.

“I’m not going to tell anyone. You need time to figure out whatever is going on, without Connie and Sasha up your ass the entire time. But I’m really, really happy for you.” 

“Really, Marco?” you ask, leaning into Eren’s touch. 

“It’s always been you guys. You guys better not break up or else I’ll come hunt both of you down. And if I’m dead, I’ll come back to life just to haunt you guys.” 

You both laugh, smiling at Marco and then each other. Levi and Mikasa call you from the other side of backstage, gesturing for you to come over to watch the video of the performance. You give Marco and Eren a smile before you run off to where they’re standing. 

“Told you she liked you, Eren,” Marco says, elbowing him in the side. 

“I love her,” Eren responds, watching Mikasa and Levi crush you in a hug as you all hunch over the video of you and Eren performing. 

Marco smiles, giving Eren a pat on the back before he walks off to join you. Eren stays, trying to commit the memory to mind. You in a sparkly, silver dress looking at him like he's the sun. 

Eren Jaeger is in love with you. 

- 

Two afterparties later and you and Eren are in a disgusting tattoo parlor down the street. 

“I can’t believe you convinced me to do this, Eren.” 

Eren smiles as he presses a kiss to your cheek, the two of you leaning through the little prints in the binder. You’re getting matching tattoos. 

“I can be very persuasive.” 

“Uh-huh. More like hypnotic. I’m half convinced you have me under some spell right now.” 

“You pick what we do. Whatever you want, I’ll get it tattooed.” 

“We should do something special, Eren. Like something that has significance to us.” 

Eren smiles, lifting your hand to press a kiss to your knuckles again before he responds. 

“Okay, okay. Let’s do fish.” 

You smile, nodding at him. 

“Koi fish. Like from that show, the Last Airbender. One fish is the ocean and the other one is the moon” you say. 

“I call the ocean, Y/N.” 

“What? I wanted to be the ocean.” 

“No. That doesn’t fit.” 

“Why not?” 

“Because the moon pulls on the ocean. The waves in the ocean, objectively the best part, don’t exist without the moon. I’m the ocean. You’re my moon.” 

You smile, leaning forward to kiss Eren before you tell the artist the design you two want. And when the two of you walk out, matching sore arms from the ink, you can’t help but wonder how you ever got so lucky in the first place.

A few years down the line, you stare at Eren's blocked contact and think back to that moment. The two of you running down the streets, bathed in dim lamplight laughing into the night. Matching tattoos, a confession on the tips of your tongues like you're two soulmates destined to be together. 

You wonder where it got so fucked up between the two of you in the first place.

--

next part linked here

taglist: @k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06  @bsenpai @sweetenertea @mykyoon @violetmatcha  @rebeccawinters @cutiejg @bokutosthings @bookwrmm @mblrrr @wheredidmycrowngo @somethinginyoureyes7 @chilichopsticks @okaystopwhore @you-always-made-me-blush @itzmeme @firelordazulaaaa @whoami-72 @g-ghostly @intimacywithceline @erensmoodygf @cocomellxn @princess-ackerman @jaegerfiles @cacapeepee @squirrelspoetry @rui-0836 @moonmalice @invisible-mori @sofiasber @bbybeeb @timetobegone @tee4str @ttokki2 @leave-rae-alone @ec3lipsy @officialsimpp

pls comment on this post or any of the chapters if you want to be added to the taglist <3

[rottenpumpkin13]

in honor of me having to get parts of my toenail removed, how would agszc be with a regular ol' doctors appointment? no Hojo, no Hollander, just a regular checkup

THAT'S AWFUL WHAT HAPPENED??

• Genesis hates getting sick, but gets sick frequently. As a result, he's accustomed to seeing doctors, and the medical staff at Shinra (including Hollander) are familiar with his medical record. So he tries his best to appear as healthy and normal to the doctor as possible.

Genesis: As you can see, I'm perfectly healthy.

Doctor: Your nose is bleeding and you have a fever.

Genesis: Red matches my coat and I'm naturally hot and attractive.

Doctor: The skin on your neck is purple and spotted.

Genesis: Hickeys. I receive them quite frequently.

Doctor: It looks like irritation.

Genesis: Yes, Sephiroth irritated me before he gave them to me.

Doctor:

• Zack prides himself on his perfect health and enjoys being praised for it. Unfortunately, he isn't used to doctors outside of Shinra and he's a nervous talker.

Doctor: How do you feel?

Zack: I feel fine! No headaches today.

Doctor:

Zack: Not that I usually get headaches. I mean I do, but they're usually so bad I can't even see.

Doctor:

Zack: But my eyesight is great, though. I mean not great great, but better than it was last week, when I was seeing dark spots after doing one too many squats.

Doctor:

Zack: I'm talking too much, aren't I? I hope it's not mad cow disease, because I heard that eating too much beef makes you get that.

Doctor:

Zack: I have mad cow disease, don't I?

• Sephiroth is less nervous than he would be at Shinra (Hojo is his primary physician). But he's not used to doctor appointments outside the labs and doesn't know how to act, assuming they follow the same procedures.

Doctor: Go ahead and take a seat on that table there.

Sephiroth: What surgeries will you be performing today?

Doctor: ....none. It's just a regular checkup.

Sephiroth: Ah, lying to spring a sudden invasive procedure upon me. Very well, I understand. I'll refrain from further inquiry.

*The doctor takes out a stethoscope*

Sephiroth: The first instrument of torture, I see.

Doctor:

• Cloud grew up in Nibelheim, where medical care was questionable and the few practitioners often employed impractical and esoteric methods. Nevertheless, Cloud grew up healthy and strong, so he heeds his mother's warning and "doesn't trust big-city doctors."

Doctor: It looks like your blood pressure is a bit high.

Cloud: Say no more. I have to take a spoonful of salt mixed with olive oil at every hour for a week right after going on a run, and then reward myself with a salty snack to scare my blood pressure into lowering.

Doctor: You will die.

• Angeal is a funny case because he's somewhat of a hypochondriac, but only when he's at the doctor. This stems from his anxiety and the constant worry that he has a problem that needs to be fixed as soon as possible.

Doctor: How are you—

Angeal: I'm experiencing mood swings, changes in my appetite, fatigue, chronic pain, digestive issues, excessive exhaustion, and a persistent feeling that I'm dying. Clearly I have a fatal disease. How long do I have left to live?

Doctor: That sounds like depression.

Angeal:

[jacksdinonuggets]

Separated

Summary: Carmilla tries to get Vaggie to go to Daycare but it doesn’t end up well.

featuring Permaregressor and Autistic Vaggie

Notes: I spent like 2 hours straight writing this because i didn't want to lose the motivation.

It was early in the morning and Carmilla was trying to get Vaggie to wake up. Today would be the permaregressed girl’s first day at daycare. Even though she was not happy with the idea of being away from her Mami for more than an hour, she reluctantly complied. It was mainly because Carmilla promised that if she didn’t like it, they would go out for ice cream.

However, waking up when the sun rose was pretty hard. Vaggie really wanted to go back to sleep and didn’t want to do their normal morning routine.

“Vaggie, come on, Bebe, it’s time to wake up,” Carmilla lightly shook Vaggie. The girl whined in response.

After many tries of waking her up, (Giving her a glass of water, turning the lights on, playing some music) she finally got out of bed.

“Alright, sweetie, before we get you changed, you can tell me how old you are?” The overlord asked. They did age checks every morning and whenever it seemed like Vaggie dropped in age. Even though she mainly stayed at 4 or 5, she could easily drop into babyspace. Dropping into babyspace was quite common for her, so it was important to do these checks to make sure she was prepared for the day.

“Four…” Vaggie mumbled.

“You think you can get ready without the changing table?” She asked. Vaggie nodded.

“But can ‘ou still help me?”

Carmilla smiled, “Of course, baby,” 

After getting Vaggie changed into some overalls, a pullup (just in case), and her favorite socks and shoes, she started to do her hair. Usually, Vaggie would just have her hair down or on hot days, she would put it up in a pony tail. But today, Carmilla wanted to try something different to see if she would like it. She had braided her hair into two pigtails and had two red bows at the bottom. Vaggie gave her a thumbs up, saying that she liked it. It really made her look how she felt!

Once they got her backpack all ready with her communication cards, her paci, a diaper, her sippy cup, a few toys, her ear defenders and her lunch, Carmilla buckled Vaggie into her booster seat, before they started their drive to daycare.

Vaggie was still pretty sleepy so her anxiety wasn’t all that bad. Until they pulled up to the daycare.

When Vaggie stepped inside the colorful building, holding her Mami’s hand, she immediately got anxious. She could hear a bunch of other little’s running around and yelling and she started to whine, holding her stuffed koala tightly to her chest. The noise was a little bit overwhelming but she was a big girl! She could handle it. Hopefully.

“Don’t worry, Bebe, It will be okay. You’ll make lots of new friends. Can you give me a few deep breaths?” Carmilla squeezed her hand lightly to give reassurance. Vaggie nodded and took a few breaths, feeling a little bit better when she was done. Whenever Carmilla would notice she was getting a little anxious, she would squeeze her hand and help her with some breathing exercises.

Vaggie stayed really close to Carmilla the whole time she was checking her in, dreading the part where she would drop her off and leave. However, the time came too soon and Vaggie absolutely did NOT feel ready.

“Alright, sweetie, I have to go to my meeting now. I love you,” She gave Vaggie a quick little kiss on her forehead. 

Before she knew it, she was watching as her Mami walked out of the door.

One of the staff took Vaggie’s hand and guided her towards the playroom where everyone was. It was very colorful and full of littles running around. That made Vaggie very nervous. She hated crowds and loud noises. She desperately wanted to reach into her backpack and grab her paci and ear defenders, but then saw no one else was wearing them. She would be the only one having to wear them. What if it was seen as weird? Or none of the other kids wanted to play with her because she looked too sensitive? Or what if they sent her to the nursery with all the babies?

Vaggie made her decision. She would go sit in an isolated corner without her sensory accommodations and sit there until her Mami came back for her. Surely she wouldn’t leave her there. She would probably realize that she made a mistake and come back for her. Right?

As time passed (like 30 minutes) and Vaggie realized her Mami wasn’t coming back for her anytime soon, she started to feel herself drop. It wasn’t too bad, maybe like a year or two, but she was still a big kid! She wasn’t full on baby yet.

That didn’t stop her from crying a little bit into her koala plushy. The teachers were busy with some of the other littles that they didn’t even notice. However, someone, another little did.

“Hey, are you okay?” They crawled over to her. She looked tall, even while crawling. She had long blonde hair and red circles on her cheeks. She was wearing red overalls with a chew necklace hanging around her neck. It was in the shape of a shark tooth, which looked really cool!

Instead of doing what was right and telling her the truth, she nodded. The blonde didn’t really believe her but just shrugged.

“I’m Charlie! Wanna play with me? I have a couple of dolls we can play with?” Charlie pulled out a couple of calico critters. Vaggie used her breathing exercise and decided she would try to play while she waited for the day to end. She picked out the doll she wanted to play with and they started to play.

It was actually quite fun! They played with them for about an hour in that corner. It all started to go downhill when Charlie suggested they play house with them. She wanted to be the mama. 

Just the words “mama” got her spiraling again. Her breathing started to get a bit ragged once she realized that she wasn’t with her Mami. Was Mami ever going to come back? Did she just drop her off, never to be seen again? What if she left her? She wanted cuddles from her. She wanted to be around her. She needed her Mami now. 

“You..okay?” Charlie asked, putting down the dolls.

Everything seemed so loud now. There wasn’t anyone to protect her anymore. She was alone and vulnerable. Dropping even lower and faster, she backed up in her corner again, trying to find her Koala plush. It had a voice recording in it, maybe that would help her feel better? However, she looked but couldn’t find it. Then, she spotted a kid from the other side of the room playing with it. This just made her start to sob. Someone else was playing with HER special stuffy!

“Vaggie? Hey, it’s okay, what’s wrong?” Charlie tried to get closer to her.

“Wan M-Mami! W-wan Wally!” She cried. Wally was the name of her Koala plush.

“Who’s Wally?” Charlie asked.

Vaggie pointed to the little playing with her plush. Charlie luckily recognized the stuffed animal and knew that it was probably Wally. Knowing she couldn’t help with her wanting her Mami, she could at least help with getting her Wally back.

Charlie walked over to the kid and started to say something to him. They argued a little until Charlie started to walk back to the corner with Wally in her hands.

“I got him back for you,” Charlie said, handing her the plush. Vaggie snatched it and hugged it tightly, pressing the little recording button to play it. She really thought it would help.

However, Vaggie was wrong. Hearing her Mami’s voice made her want her even more. She needed to be near her. More ‘What if’s entered her brain and her anxiety started to rise even more. Sobs and wails escaped her throat, causing the teachers to be alerted. They crouched down to the small girl and tried to asked her what was wrong.

“Wan Mami!!” She screamed.

One of the teachers reached their hand out to her, trying to pop in a paci for her.

“Sorry, little one, But your Mami’s at work right now. Can you maybe try-”

CHOMP!

Vaggie had bitten down on their hand, hard. She didn’t want the teachers, she wanted Mami.

Finally, the teachers complied. One of them went to the front where the phone was, the one that was bitten went to the nurses station, and one of them stayed with Vaggie, making sure she didn’t hurt herself or any one else. 

Charlie managed to help the teachers by comforting her new friend and asking a few questions. Vaggie ended up being in babyspace. Charlie wasn’t really sure how to help since she doesn’t know how to comfort a baby, but she did give her her ear defenders to provide some comfort.

Carmilla was in the middle of her meeting, talking with the overlords when she heard her hellphone ring. She cursed, forgetting to put it on silent. However, when she saw that the caller id was from the daycare, she immediately got worried. Did something happen to Vaggie? It’s only been about 2 hours since she dropped her off.

Her anxiety didn’t let her send it to voicemail.

“Excuse me, one moment, I really need to take this,” She excused herself from the meeting room. Clara and Odette looked a bit worried but they tried to continue on with the meeting.

“Hello?” Carmilla answered the phone once she was in the hallway.

“Ms. Carmine? There’s uhh, a situation here at the daycare. It seems like your daughter isn’t adjusting well and has slipped into her babyspace. We do have a nursery in the other room, but I’m afraid it wouldn’t be beneficial. If you could please come pick your daughter up soon, we can talk about this when you get here,” 

Carmilla knew that if she were to say no and leave Vaggie there, all the trust she gained would be ruined.

“Alright, I’ll be there in about 10 minutes,” She said before hanging up.

“I’m sorry, everyone, but I have to leave. My daughters will continue the meeting without me,” She told the group. 

When she arrived at the daycare, the teachers brought Carmilla to the back of the playroom. She could hear Vaggie’s cries loud and clear. When she saw her baby, curled up in the corner, sobbing hard, she immediately regretted taking her to daycare.

“Hey, Bebe, it’s okay, Mami’s here,” She crouched down in front of her. Vaggie immediately jumped into her arms, hugging her tightly.

“D-d-dun w-weave me!” She cried into her shoulder. 

“Shh, I’m not leaving you,” She lifted it up and put her paci into her mouth. She grabbed her backpack and started to carry her out of the building.

“Ms. Carmine… I don’t think your daughter is ready for daycare. We recommend getting her diagnosed as she seems to have some separation anxiety. Until you can get all that worked out, we don’t think she should be in daycare,” The teacher with a bandage around his hand told her. Judging by the bandage, Carmilla could tell what probably happened.

“I understand, I’ll make sure to get her diagnosed too. Have a good day and sorry about the injury,” Carmilla said before walking out. 

The rest of the day, Vaggie was deep into babyspace. While she was napping, Carmilla made sure to book an appointment to get her diagnosed. She had been putting it off because she thought that maybe she was just a tiny bit attached. But what happened today was more than just being a bit attached.

But no matter what, Carmilla still loved her baby and would be willing to make accommodations for her if it was necessary.

[onboardsorasora]

🎾Tennis AU pt 33🎾

No, your eyes do not deceive you, you don't need to adjust your glasses. Wanted a bit of fluff from these boys specifically

Part 1 - Max Meets Dan | Part 31 - Thanksgiving | Part 32 - FIA Prizegiving

He was late, Max and Rupert had gone on ahead of him while he'd had an interview scheduled at the hotel. The SUV pulled up to the edge of the Melbourne Walk and Daniel's eyes widened at the size of the crowd.

“You reckon we can just power walk it through?” Blake asked and Daniel gave him a dubious look in return. 

“We can try. It probably won't be so bad though.” 

The door opened and Daniel stepped out, smiling his thanks to the volunteer. He only had a second before he registered that the crowd was going wild. It wasn't until he closed the door and saw people stretching their arms out with caps and signs and markers towards him that he realized that the crowd was going wild for him.

Daniel! Omg Daniel! We love you Daniel! Aussie Aussie Aussie! Ki Ki ki!! aaahhhh Daniel! Danny Ric!!

Two burly security people flanked him from seemingly nowhere and Daniel felt his eyes widen further before he shook himself out of it and stepped onto the Walk. 

It was chaos of a good kind. He couldn't remember signing so many things at any one time at an open. He still couldn't believe this was his life. This must have been what Max felt like when he'd come to the Australian open. No one had expected all the screaming fans with red bull racing kits stretching for a picture or his touch.

At the end of the path was an interviewer and Daniel grinned when the presenter threw an arm around his shoulder to start asking him questions. I honestly couldn't hear himself think over the roar of the crowd and truly was happy when they made it further into the more quiet parts of the paddock.

“Mate that was mental.” Daniel gushed to an equally floored Blake.

“We might have to get you a disguise to get you outta here later.”

They made it to the energy station, waving to DC and Adrian as they sequestered themselves in the quieter space.

“Oh Daniel, there you are! C'mon, I need you to change quick.” Vicky came out of nowhere, pushing Daniel in the direction of the driver rooms.

“Hey Vicks, erm what are we doing?”

“You're doing a hot lap with Max and Ford. I need you to change into the race suit in Max's room and then we need to go.”

Daniel looked back at Blake who seemed to be looking at his phone, Daniel wondering if he was checking the out of nowhere overfilled calendar again.

He changed as quickly as he could, fighting to get the navy nomex up his thighs without Max's help. The race suit was navy and basic. Branding him Red Bull and Ford Performance. He walked out and was immediately escorted onto a golf cart.

“Daniel!” Max greeted him with a kiss and Daniel calmed down a little. His anxiety had been spiking with all of the new unknowns happening at the same time.

“Hey baby. Do you know what's going on here?” Daniel looked dubiously at the helmet he was given and Max grinned at him. Luckily Vicky explained in short order.

“So I'm supposed to ask him questions while he tries to make me puke on a lap? And you want to film this?” He asked even more dubiously, Max's snort made him smile.

“You won't puke Daniel. It's just like a rollercoaster, I think.” Max pointed out, Daniel didn't have the heart to tell him that the last rollercoaster he'd been on he actually had puked a little. He'd keep that tidbit to himself.

They strapped him up in the car and Daniel looked at the cardstock paper they gave him. There were a few questions and the paper was thick in case he started clenching it maybe.

“You'd think they'd use a bigger font or something.” Daniel muttered which caused Max to look over at him and laugh.

“You'll be fine. Just make shit up if you can't read em.” Max shrugged and patted Daniel's thigh. “You look lovely by the way.”

Daniel grinned at him and blew a kiss.

“So what should I do?” 

“Uhm, just brace, maybe. Keep your head planted on the headrest as best you can and look forward don't try to look through the windows, you'll get sick.” 

Daniel felt his shoulders lose some of their tension at Max's words and cadence. He could do this. It wouldn't be so bad.

He was wrong. It was bad. Damn this thing was fast as fuck. A hysterical laugh tore itself from his throat.

“The questions!” Max prompted with his own laugh. 

“Oh shit!” Daniel giggled and patted his lap to find the paper. “God these words are vibrating all together– uhm when– uh fuck it I can't see shit. What's your favorite Ford vehicle?” Daniel couldn't read those questions if he tried. He was in a Ford with Ford emblazoned on his chest. When in doubt, think about marketing

Max laughed a happy sound. “That raptor we drove in LA was pretty great. Remember when we took it up the mountain. I didn't think we would have made it to that ridge when you went off road but I was surprised.”

Daniel cackled when he remembered how Max yelled at him the entire time they were pretty much diagonally climbing the hill. “Oh it was so sick, the four wheel drive on that thing mate. Holy crap this thing is fast! We might have to get one of these too.”

They laughed all the way to the end of the lap while Max started drifting through the last turns. 

“Oh jeepers that was mental.” Daniel crawled out of the van, comically pretending to kiss the asphalt while Max rolled his eyes and took off his helmet.

“It wasn't that bad, I think.” 

“This is why I drive when we're going anywhere!” Daniel laughed at Max's grin.

“No, this is why Blake drives.” Max needled then ran off with a laugh when Daniel lunged after him.

[random-imagines-blog]

Imagine your co-workers on the Avengers films confronting you about your eating disorder.

You were struggling, and on top of that, you were the only one that wasn’t acknowledging it. As you sat down at the canteen with only your cup of hot water with lemon - no tea, no honey, just hot water, your friends and colleagues looked among one another, knowing that now was the time to bring it up. They were having trouble watching someone that they cared about clearly spiraling, clearly fighting a war within themselves.

“This pasta is amazing,” Jeremy said, eyeing you. “Want some of mine?”

“I’m good, thanks," You smiled, blowing the steam off the top of your mug. “Is it just me or is it freezing in here?”

“Just you,” Robert said, considering he and the rest of the crew were all wearing t-shirts. But there you were in a cardigan, keeping yourself covered, hugging the mug between your palms like it was the only warmth that you could get. “If you ate something, you might feel warmer.”

Blunt as always. You flinched against the idea, and pulled the cardigan self-consciously tighter against your front.

“Real subtle,” Chris Evans said, sidling up next to you. He understood anxiety and the effects that it can have on the body, on the psyche, so he made sure he was the one that was the closest to you. “Y/N, what Robert is  trying to say is ... we’ve noticed your .. diet.”

You held the mug tighter in your hands. You stared straight ahead at the table. A ring from someone’s coffee had stained the wood. It gave you something to focus on.

“Susan in costuming was saying that they had to put padding in your costume because it got bigger,” Robert said, crossing his arms over himself. “That’s a bad sign, y/n. And I know a lot about bad signs.”

“She shouldn’t have told anyone about that,” You said, cheeks flaming red.

“We’ve all been through something like this,” Scarlett frowned, across from you. “It comes with the job, unfortunately. We’re just worried about you, honey, because we love you.”

“Yeah,” Jeremy nodded. “And we’re here to talk, to help, whatever you need.”

You did feel the love. How could you not? But you were still nervous. Still feeling sick. Feeling - watched. “That pasta does look good...” You had to admit. Your stomach was calling out for something more substantial than the water, than the lemon slice that you’d savor over the rest of the day.

“Try a bite,” Jeremy encouraged, putting some on his fork. You took just the smallest bit, one of the ziti noodles, and chewed it. Thankfully, Chris started talking about something so that no one would actually be watching you eat, which helped. You swallowed it. You felt the urge to make it rise back up, thinking about how the pasta was just calories, the cheese oh lord, but you kept it down. It was a start, everyone knew. A very slow one, but a start nonetheless.

Requested by: Anonymous

[ieatkeyboard]

Date Night

Diavolo cancels on Lucifer last minute but the avatar of Pride doesn't want to cancel the reservation so he takes you with him Warnings: Nsft, Lucifer X Reader, unprotected, P in V, intimate. T Crimson nails complemented the silk around his neck as he neatly tied his tie. He was going to some fancy restaurant that opened up. The tall mans DDD and he took it off the coffee table. "Hello, Lucifer! I'm afraid Barbatos is keeping me in tonight as I got more work last minute T_T How about you take MC with you, take them on that date you've been telling me about :P" The avatar sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. He hesitated before replying. "Of course, give me directions and I'll ask them right away." "Good Luck! :D" He looked at his phone as anxiety filled his stomach. At the end of the day, if you say no, what's the big deal, right? He tapped your name on his phone and began typing. "Hello, Mc. Are you busy?" His cheeks became hot when he saw you typing. "Hey, Luci! I'm free right now, what's up?" "Diavolo and I had a reservation at a new restaurant but something came up last minute and he had to cancel. Would you like to go with me instead?""Of course! Do I need to dress up?""It is a formal establishment so yes, if you don't mind.""Alright! How long do I have to get ready?""Twenty minutes, preferably wear something red. I'll get you from your room before we go.""See you then ;)" His pale lips curved into a gentle smile. It wouldn't be the first time he'd taken you out to dinner and he hoped this wouldn't be the last but it always gave him butterflies. You slipped on a black sleek maxi dress. The last time he saw you wear it to a party he wouldn't stop staring at you. You put on a ruby necklace, a matching ring and red heels. You figured it would be enough red to get away with. Eyeliner and lashes were saved for last. You had 5 minutes to spare. Not bad you thought, grabbing your DDD and sending the demon a text. "I'm ready to go!" The three dots popped of quickly, as if he were eagerly waiting for you to be done. "Of course, I'm on my way." You heard a knock on your door and opened it with a smile. A soft pink blossomed on his cheeks as he looked at you. "You look gorgeous." He mumbled and his eyes went wide as you giggled. "I could as the same for you, I can see why you wear red so often." Your hand went to his cheek. "Now..We have to sneak out or my brothers are gonna throw a fit. I'd prefer it was just us at this dinner." He explained holding your hands in his. "I'll head out first, you follow behind a couple minutes later. If my brothers ask, say you're going with a friend." "Alright." You watched him walk out and heard him yell at Mammon to behave while he was gone. You sat, scrolling devilgram for a couple minutes, going through what your excuse would be. You hurried down the stairs, carrying your heels and quickly putting them on. Asmo saw you and became curious. "Ooo you're all dolled up! Why are you in such a hurry?" The strawberry haired boy asked, grabbed your purse and handing it to you. "My friend's going through a breakup so I'm taking her out on a friend date to help her forget him. But I spent to long trying to figure out what to wear." You said, rushing to get your heels back on. "And no you may NOT come. She needs a break from dating and you're a giant flirt. Have fun, behave, you wanna party go to a club, love ya!" You yelled running out the door. You ran down the front steps and walked past a couple trees until large hands pulled you out of sight. A deep, familiar voice whispered in your ear, "Relax, it's me." Your breathing slowed and he gave you a minute before walking you to his car. Of course, a matte black camaro. He opened the door for you and you got in, Soon enough he was next to you and driving away from the dark house. The drive consisted of talking about each other's week and complementing each other. You pulled up to the building and he parked. "Are you read, Darling?" You flushed at the name, smiling and nodding as he got out and opened the door for you.

You linked arms as he spoke to the woman at the counter, she walked you to your seats and left you with two menus.

You were glad he told you to dress up or you'd stick out like a sore thumb. The light was dim and warm as crystal chandeliers reflected the light. "I feel so out of place" You giggled. "It's beautiful." "Don't worry, you look the part. They'd never know how clumsy you are by looking at you." He smirked. "And they wouldn't know you're a lovey dovey dork by looking at you." You retorted, smirking as he looked at you with wide eyes. "Oh really?" He smiled as he leaned forward "Really." You smiled, grabbing his hand and running your thumb over his.

You ordered food and got a couple glasses of wine in your system. "Baby?" "Hmm?" He hummed, looking up at you. His eyes shone brightly as he looked at you. He looked so calm. Happy. "Are you ready to go home?" You asked, holding his hand and he nodded, grabbing his wallet and taking some cash out. You stacked the dishes and left the money there as you walked out. He walked you to the car and watched as you almost twisted your ankle, heels and alcohol was not a good mix. He opened the car door and knelt down. "Face me, Honey." He said holding your knee. You turned so your legs were out of the car and he slipped your heels off. A sigh of pleasure fell from your mouth. "There we go. Much better." He smiled at you and buckled you in before closing the door. He held your hand the entire drive home, occasionally giving the back of your hand a kiss. You held your uncomfortable shoes in one hand as Lucifer carried you to the house. "Can you open the door for me?" He asked, kissing your head as you reached for the door knob. "There you go" You said softly, kissing his jaw as he step in the house. "Now close the door." He said, turning you so your feet were towards the door, you managed to slip your foot in the door handle and attempted to close it. "Almost there! Come on!" He smiled and you two giggled. When the door closed he kicked his shoes off and placed you down. "Luci?" "Yes?" "Can we dance?"

You two ran into Beel in the hallway and he smiled at you. "You guys look nice." He said before walking off. Lucifer took you into his room and put a record onto his record player. Merry Go Round of Life began to play. "Levi told me you liked the movie this song came from so I figured I'd get it for you." He said as he took one of your hands in his and the other slipped around your waist. "Oh Luci..I love you." You whispered, kissing him. His hand left yours and went to your chin as he deepened your affections. His tongue grazed your lower lip and you opened your mouth. "This dress is beautiful but I think it'd be prettier on the floor" He whispered into your ear as he undid your necklace and placed it on the table. You took off your gloves and set them on the table along with his tie and jacket.

"You want me to do it, don't you?" He whispered, smirking at you. "You know the answer to that." You smiled. He began to roll up his sleeve. You loved how it showed off his forearms. "Better?" He asked, leaning his hands on the bed to support himself as he towered over you. You hummed in agreement and your hands went to the sides of his neck as you brought him into another kiss. "I love you so much." You whispered. "I love you more, Beautiful." He breathed as you slid his pants down half way down his thighs, letting his red boxers stay. He began to grind against your soft entrance, letting his head fall into the crook of your neck. "Lucifer~" You moaned, sliding your hands under his boxers and holding his hips as he continued. "I need you, My Love..Please" He whispered. His teeth grazed your neck as he left marks and his hips stopped in their tracks as you brought his boxers down. "Do it." You said, looking him in the eye. "Use me." Your hands latched onto his back and your legs wrapping around his hips. His thrusts were slow and deep as he kissed you. Soft "I love you"s falling from your mouths. He held your hands and pressed his forehead against yours as you closed your eyes. "I'm close, My Love...I want you to come with me, can you do that?" He mumbled as he groaned. "Yes. Yes please yes." You moaned, arms wrapping around his neck. "I'll count down from 5" 5 "Ohhh Luci!" 4 "Fuck.." 3 "Hold on a little longer, Sweetheart" 2 "FuUCK" 1 He pulled you into a kiss as he fucked his cum into you. He rolled off of you and you laid on his chest. "Let's hope your brothers are asleep." "Mmm, let's hope they don't need anything. I don't feel like picking our clothes off the floor right now." You giggled and grabbed the blanket off the edge of the bed, pulling it over the both of you. "Good night, Luci, I love you." "I love you more, My Dear. Rest well." NOTE: I love this so much. I hope you enjoyed!

[offorestsongs]

Wait uhm uhm let me distract you plus rook and lys...

anon how are you so fast,,, but thank you so much for the ask!!

Lysander insomnia time !! woo !!! as you can see, i got a bit carried away.....

(ask game here!)

"I'm so sorry," Lysander said, eyes stubbornly locked on the floor; old, dark wood and a red-brown rug, on the more ugly side of things, just like many other items that were already in Ramshackle when Lysander arrived. Definitely not as pleasant to look at as his boyfriend's face, except if Lysander looked Rook in the face right now, the embarrassment and guilt would eat him alive.

There were few things that Lysander hated more than this. Maybe he was a meek, powerless human without an ounce of magic in his veins, but there were still parts of his life he could rein and and take control of. He didn't like exposing just how little that was. Just exactly how powerless he really was.

And — most of all — he didn't like being dependent on anyone. Not his friends. Not even his boyfriend. Lysander should be the person others could depend on, not the other way around.

"I keep bothering you at night and I know I shouldn't, you should get rest too, I know, and yet I'm still being so selfish and—"

"Oh non, love, I shall not allow you to speak about yourself in that way," Rook cut in before Lysander could finish his guilt-filled monologue; he hooked his finger under Lysander’s chin, gently raising Lysander’s head.

Lysander looked away, cheeks hot.

"You're not burdening me, mon fleur. Do you think I could sleep soundly, knowing my beloved cannot peacefully rest? It would torment my soul as much as yours. And," Rook leaned in closer — even without looking at him Lysander could still hear a smile in his voice. "I, too, sleep better while holding you in my arms. No lullaby could ever replace the beating of your heart."

They've been over this conversation so many times now. Lysander, not able to sleep another night, called Rook. Rook, in turn, showed up at Lysander’s bedroom as if it was nothing unusual. Then Lysander started to get bad, then Rook went to coax him— according to their usual schedule, this was the time where Lysander finally gave in.

How could he not, when his boyfriend was being so impossibly sweet?

He let out a sigh. "You're impossible," he said, not without fondness. He finally looked up at Rook and almost instantly regretted it.

Rook's eyes were so warm and full of affection; Lysander had no idea how to handle it. Was it all really for him? Was he really worth it?

"Shall we get to bed?" Without waiting for an answer, he swooped Lysander off the floor, holding him now like one would a bride.

Well. That certainly did the trick. There was no easier way to wipe every coherent thought from Lysander’s head than to remind him how strong his boyfriend was.

"Warn a boy next time!" Lysander yelped, thought half of his words drowned in his own laughter.

Feeling just a little bit lightheaded and with his arms wrapped around Rook's neck, he allowed Rook to carry him to the bed.

They laid together, limbs wrapped around eachother, Rook's head on Lysander’s chest, just above his heart. Some of the anxiety seizing Lysander’s heart up until now had eased. He felt warm and comfortable and right.

(Rook was still wearing his day clothes, but Lysander didn't comment on it. If his boyfriend felt comfortable sleeping in jeans, who was Lysander to judge him?)

"I am worried about you, thought. Those restless nights, they seem to be happening more often these days. Will you tell me what plagues your mind?"

Lysander pursed his lips. "Not tonight," he said, absentmindedly playing with the choppy ends of Rook's hair.

One day. One day he will tell Rook about it all, about his fears and memories. But that wasn't the day for it — maybe he won't be, for a long time. He was sure Rook will understand. If there was one person in the world who would understand keeping things close to your chest, it was Rook.

"Ah." Rook raised his head to look at Lysander. He was smiling like a cat just about to catch the mouse. "Should I distract you, then?"

Lysander’s cheeks turned a shade of pink almost matching his hair.

"You were supposed to help me sleep, not keep me up all night!"

"Just one kiss, mon cheri, that is all I ask of you. Your lips — non, your face — look too beautiful in the evening light to not kiss them."

Lysander was never one for strong will. "But just one kiss," he said, fully aware it will end up being much more.

"Just one! You have my word."

And Lysander allowed Rook to kiss the breath out of him, kiss him until every bone in his body felt like it was melting, kiss him until there was no thoughts left in his head.

[hellcheer-heaven]

Budding - 90s Pregnant Hellcheer

Beard Eddie photo by @eddiemunsons-missingnipple Click here for the post Thanks for giving me the okay for using your photo edit.

Thank you @a-strange-inkling for proofreading the beginning stages of this short fic. Also please check out both creators listed here.

Waking up early in the morning came naturally to Eddie, it was pretty much a part of himself like the curly locks on his head; and currently the dark hairs sprouting from his face. He looked over at the sleeping woman, hair draped along her shoulders and face so at peace. Chrissy has been getting some much needed rest lately for the sake of her health and for the developing little one in her womb. There was a lovely sort of glow that surrounded her no matter where she went. Even on the days when she felt and proclaimed that she looked like a terrible mess, Eddie reassured her that nothing would dull her sparkle.

It was another quiet, lazy Saturday in their neighborhood. Most of their neighbors were still asleep, say for a few early birds that wanted to get their steps in before breakfast. Eddie occupied himself with whisking raw eggs and adding just a bit of milk to give it that fluffy texture that Chrissy liked. He practically tore open the entire package of bacon, nearly loosing a few stragglers, but thankfully his lightening fast reflexes caught the flying pork. The coffee maker bubbled as he placed the large glass container beneath the dispenser. Before he could turn on the stove, Chrissy’s sudden gasp caused him to rush to the room.

“PleasebeokayPleasebeokayPleasebeokay!” His mind begged. Eddie nearly lost his balance as he ran down the carpeted hallway before catching himself, firmly planting his feet onto the ground. “Chrissy? Baby? Are you okay? Do you need to go to the emergency room?!”

Chrissy’s back faced him, her blue eyes gazing into the mirror with quite the wide eyed stare. “Eddie… I…”

Eddie was afraid something absolutely terrible must have happened, but he had to take a deep breath. “Y-Yes? What is it?”

She slowly turned around, something was quite different with her. Aside from her bump, there was also the newly developed pair of breasts protruding out from Eddie’s nice dress shirt.

She kept herself covered, feeling incredibly embarrassed at how much skin was showing, “Eddie my boobs got bigger!”

He gulped, his mind heavily chastising him for the thoughts that were appearing. He had to think of something, anything to say to his beloved wife.

His face felt so hot and red, “Y-Yeah… yeah they did.”

It’s not like they haven’t seen each other semi to fully nude before. In her current state, this was vastly different than what she or he were used to. They both stared, flabbergasted at the single or possible double cup size increase.

Eddie hurried to readjust his vision, “How do you feel Chrissy?”

Her fingers gently felt along her budding skin, “I feel weird.”

“Do you have to go to the hospital?”

She gave him a reassuring smile, it gave him some relief of his anxiety. “No I’m fine. I just… never really thought they would grow that much.” She faced her reflection, shrugging off the shirt to get a closer look. “It’s just, I look so different.”

Eddie placed a loving hand to her shoulder, she held onto it sweetly. He pecked the top of her head, “Good different or bad different?”

She sighed, “I don’t know. I just… never really imagined that I would actually get big breasts.” Chrissy winced slightly when she held up the tender bundles.

They felt and appeared so oddly shaped to her. Then again having her abdomen sticking out from her small frame was still so unusual to see. Chrissy was always so used to having the body that she had always had: Petite with muscle and a bit of body fat. Nothing out of the ordinary for some people, but the things that her mother said did a number on her self esteem, self image, and self worth. Always making her believe that she was ugly and unattractive in her childhood and especially during adolescence.

Fat pig, string bean, baby face, rabbit teeth, body of a child, too quiet, not lady like, and so much more.

Even when her body began to naturally change during puberty and now during pregnancy, her mother still made it her mission to make her life hell. It’s no wonder Chrissy and her darling husband found a house of their own some towns away from Hawkins.

Eddie moved a lock of her hair behind her ear, “Do they hurt?”

“A little bit.”

He nuzzled into her neck, his voice filled with concern, “Only a little?”

She carefully placed them back down, really considering how she truly felt, “Well, more than a little. They feel sensitive and sore. It’s like I’m going through puberty again, but now I have these and my stomach is…”

Eddie cradled her pretty belly, his warm palms tracing her lovely stretch marks. “You look beautiful Chrissy.”

The lump in her throat started to grow even more, “But I feel like a fat cow.” She shut her eyes tightly, “And I look like one too!”

Eddie just wanted to hug her as tightly as he could, but all he could do was gently wrap his arms around her, leaning in to kiss her cheek. “You’re beautiful Chrissy, no matter what your brain tries to tell you. You’re the most courageous, amazing, and beautiful woman in the whole world.”

She swiped her teary eyes with the backs of her hands, “I wish I could believe that Eddie!”

Eddie turned her around and pecked her face, sweetly and generously giving her as many pecks he could give her until the tiniest smile pulled at her cotton candy colored lips. She softly cooed his name, her tears forming from self loathing to affectionate. She couldn’t prevent her giggles from tumbling out, the scruff tickling her neck as he bent down. Chrissy nibbled her lower lip, watching the way his bubblegum pink mouth planted more and more upon her body. Slowly and earnestly along her breasts, looking up to gauge her reaction: Chrissy was all smiles, batting her eyelashes at him.

She ran her fingers through his curls, “Eddie, that feels really nice. It kinda tickles a little.”

He closed his eyes, his hands caressing the sides of her body as his lips followed the shape of her torso. Wanting to follow every stretch mark with his fingers and tongue, but she was vulnerable and that wouldn’t be fair to her. Instead he placed the side of his face along her bump, breathing lightly as the warm flesh heated his cheek. Eddie looked up and still could see the sunshine smile of his Spring Goddess, her flower bed and fruits growing healthily.

Chrissy cradled his sweet, hairy face, rubbing the apples of his cheeks with her thumbs. His lips proceeded to return back up until their mouths collided, that’s when he heard it again: Laughter. Her laughter was the most wonderful melody that he could ever hear. No amount of string bending, shredding, or tapping would ever compare. They walked over to the bed, and he helped her onto her back, making sure that her pillows were aligned the way they were supposed to be for both support and comfort.

Chrissy curled her pointer finger, wanting a little more love; boy did he deliver. Kisses, kisses, and more kisses. She then began to whimper, the sensitive sensation returning to her breasts once more. Eddie was careful to not put any kind of weight on her, laying next to her and kissing her hand.

“Is there anything I can do to help you?”

She thought for a moment, tapping her fingers upon the mattress to find her answer. What did the moms back in Hawkins suggest during this time? A gentle massage with massage oil was the way to go according to them. He smiled, soon returning with a jar of oil that Mrs. Sinclair, Wheeler, Byers, and Henderson swore by. Thank god for their wisdom and experience, because the last person Chrissy would ever turn to regarding motherhood was her own mom.

They sat there for a moment, the two of them looking back and forth at the jar and her chest.

He gulped nervously, “So… um…”

“I guess you can start,” Chrissy mentioned, still a bit weirded out as well; honestly that makes two of them.

He swallowed, “Y-Yeah. Yup, I’m gonna massage your ti- breasts.” He sighed slowly through his nostrils, “Holy shit her tits are huge. So fucking soft and squishy. Our baby is so lucky.”

She nodded, gulping down as well, “Yeah, you’re gonna touch them.” She proceeded to open the dress shirt, blushing a bit at the sight. “God I feel like a cow! Jesus my tits look like someone sewed cantaloupes in me. Please don’t turn into watermelons! Please!”

Eddie broke the silence, it was probably the stupidest thing he’s said in a while, but he really needed to know. “So I’m not going to squeeze all of your milk out, right?”

Chrissy held his hand, showing him a wonderful grin and a warm chuckle, “No Eddie, my milk isn’t going to come out.”

“I just don’t want to hurt you, sweetheart.”

She held his worried face, “You won’t hurt me, you never have.”

Eddie grinned, moving his face to kiss her palm before warming up the oil in his hands. He could feel the more immature part of his brain telling him to do things to her chest. The rest of his mind continued to scold him before locking up that area. With all distractions put aside, he could then focus on her needs. His tattooed hands and fingers slowly touched the heaping bundles of flesh, following the shape in precise circles. Starting with both and then transitioning to each one individually with his talented hands. Chrissy observed how those inked appendages motioned along her breasts, gazing through her lashes and following the way he very gently sculpted her.

She giggled, “Eddie, I really like that. Ooh, you’re so gentle. I love how sweet you are.”

He gave her a playful wink, “Sweet as honey baby girl.” He stopped momentarily when she softly gasped, his worrying thoughts returning in a flash, “Are you okay?”

“Mmhm, that just felt really, really good.”

His eyes looked between her face and body, “Are you gonna… you know?”

Her brows rose up, nodding slowly and waiting patiently for him to continue. She knew the word, but still wanted to hear it from him, “Am I going to what?”

His fingers started to slowly release her, his bashful smile evidently displayed, “Squirt milk?”

Close enough.

He couldn’t help but hide his face when she started to laugh, very loudly actually. When her giggle fit was over, Chrissy moved his hands aside and pecked the thorn surrounded rose tattoo on the back of one hand.

She placed a curly lock behind his ear, “I’m sorry Eddie, that was just really funny. It’s lactate, baby. That’s the word you’re looking for.” Chrissy held up her bosoms, giving them a gentle squeeze, “And no the doctor said it’ll be a while before that happens. Actually they could end up getting larger.”

“Really?” He sounded a little hopeful, something that Chrissy slyly smirked at to which Eddie changed his tone. “I mean… um… that sucks.”

“Pun intended Eddie?”

He gave her a cute pout before smirking himself, “Geez Chrissy, you’re really putting me between a rock and a hard place.”

Chrissy snickered, “Well I’m sure resting your head on something soft might ease the tension.”

Was she being serious or just joking? Either way he was pleased knowing that she was happy, comfortable, and safe. They hardly said anything for the remainder of the morning as he commenced with massaging her. Nothing much had to be said, their smiles were enough. The gentle touches were enough. Their kisses were enough.

They were enough.

[footprintsinthesxnd]

Office Christmas Party

Pairings: Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x reader

Warnings: mentions of sex, PTSD, social anxiety, 18+

Summary: You and Jake have had a rough year but you know you’ll get through it together whilst enjoying yourselves at a Christmas Party.

“Jake, hurry up or we are going to be late,” you called up the stairs for what felt like the hundredth time, waiting impatiently for your fiancée to come down.

“Sorry, Darling. I’m coming.” He flew down the stairs at a rate of knots, nearly slipping on the rug in the hallway, he looked a little flustered and you knew he’d been giving himself a pep talk in the bathroom mirror. When he came into view he stopped, taking you in. “Wow, Babe you look hot.” He gave you his signature smile, making you blush. You were wearing a new red dress that had a rather low-cut v-neck. You weren’t normally someone who wore sexy dresses but it was one of your impulse buys so you felt like you had to see it through.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” you poked at his chest that was clad in a black tuxedo. Jake always managed to look handsome, no matter what he wore.

“It’s all for you, Darling.” He kissed you gently, knowing you’d kill him if he messed up your makeup.

“Come on, we have to go. We should have been there an hour ago.” You huffed, frustrated at yourself for letting time run away with you.

“Well, it was worth it though right.” He cocked an eyebrow at you knowingly and grinned when you blushed again. Jake Seresin was your biggest time-waster ever but he was so worth it and he knew that. You pushed him out the front door and into the car. The drive to the party was short and you managed to get there within 10 minutes as traffic had been good. As soon as you stepped out of the car, you could hear the music blaring from inside the hall and a group of people mingled around outside chatting. You and Jake made your way through the front door and were greeted by your boss, who was ushering people inside.

“Oh thank god, you bought Jake, maybe he can help get people onto the dance floor.” Jake was famous for his dancing at your work's Christmas parties, as soon as he had a few drinks, he was gone. You knew his self-assured look was all a show, that he was scared out of his mind in this very public space but once he’d had a drink he settled slightly.

“Yes ma’am, don’t worry I’ll get them dancing.” Jake saluted your boss, causing her to laugh.

“I don’t know where you found him but I want one.”

You laughed, “I found him in Miramar. I hear there’s a pretty good Naval base there.” You laughed as Jake looked at you in mock hurt.

“Pretty good? I’ll have you know I am one of the best.”

You grabbed his arm pulling him away. “Ok Hotshot, let’s get your big ego a drink.”

At the bar, you ordered two glasses of wine before taking a seat at the table. Jake tapped his foot impatiently. He always came to social work events with you but he was always a little on edge like he was waiting for something to happen. You rested your hand on his knee comfortingly and gave him a small smile. Ever since the last mission, Jake had been more on edge, never quite able to settle.

“Hey, are you ok?”

“Yes Darling, it's ok.” He reassured you, he always hated that he was ruining your evening when you’d spend all your time worrying about him. You would always reassure him that he didn’t but the nicking feeling in the back of Jake’s mind always reminded him he was a burden.

“Love, do you want to dance?”

You saw his face light up excitedly. “Anything to have you close to me, Darling.”

He held out his hand and gave a small chivalrous bow. “May I have this dance, My Lady?”

You sat there for a moment, contemplating your options before placing your hand in his. “Certainly, My Lord.”

The pair took to the dance floor, an upbeat song was playing and Jake swung you around joyfully. You both laughed, immensely happy as you danced amongst your colleagues. When the song came to the end a slow song started, Jake pulled you close, resting his hand on the small of your back and burying his face into your hair, breathing you in. You felt his shoulders relax slightly and you placed a small kiss on his neck, as you swayed slowly.

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing you gently. The song continued and people moved around you but at that moment it was just you and Jake, you were all that mattered in the whole world. When the song came to an end you pulled back to look at Jake, his handsome face lit up by the lights hanging from the ceiling, his blue eyes shining brightly. “How did I get so lucky.” You said, stroking his cheek with your thumb. He leant into your touch, closing his eyes and savouring the moment. “No, I think it's me that’s the lucky one.” He placed a chaste kiss on your lips and when he pulled away he had a light dusting of your red lipstick over his mouth. You giggled, trying to rub the lipstick off. You understood that some things that Jake had seen and experienced were difficult for him to process and talk about but having him there in your arms you knew that you’d be alright. That you’d make it together.

Tag list: @callsign-phoenix @imjess-themess @blue-aconite @averyhotchner @mayhem24-7forever @green-socks @alexxavicry @a-reader-and-a-writer @topguncortez @maggiescarborough @callsignmaverick5 @ssprayberrythings @smoothdogsgirl @xoxabs88xox @luckyladycreator2 @abaker74 @elenavampire21 @classyunknownlover @okiegirl24 @flashyourgreeneyesatme @sunlightmurdock @basiccortez @airedale17 @callmemana

[omnic]

it takes a lot of sadness for me to not want to be near people and especially not talk to people. i find talking to my friends (normally via text) quite soothing. it reached that point today where i didn't want either. i just wanted to be alone.

went into work anxious but feeling like i could manage. i've been feeling very end-of-my-tether. first customer off the bat was rude. i could feel an anxiety attack coming, my hands shaking and struggling to breathe. i asked a coworker if i could prep the hot food, and if she could do the customer's coffee. she just looked at me and started doing the hot food. my manager was pissed that i didn't do the coffee immediately, and the customer berated me too. so i shakily did the coffee, gave it to him, then went behind the counter and cried. my supervisor was the first to comfort me, surprisingly, she can be quite vicious. she offered that i do more non customer facing things so i did.

i was prepping some toasties later and i could feel the attack creeping up on me again. had to brace myself against the metal counter as i focused on breathing, hoping it'd pass. my manager (who saw me cry the first time) got mad at me for "standing about" when we had no customers at the time. cue crying again.

i managed to calm down a bit, dabbed my eyes, though they were definitely red and puffy. went to serve customers, this time. meekly called out, "can i help anyone," because, you know. crying. normally i find putting on my customer facing persona easy, but i couldn't today. just so happened the son of the owner of the entire franchise was there and began digging into me for not trying harder to get customers' attention. told me "actually we lost a customer because of you" because someone walked out and "you should be better than this". i had no energy to reply so i just weakly smiled and nodded as tears filled my eyes. after he left i broke down sobbing.

my manager offered me to clock out early, but it didn't feel out of compassion. she didn't ask me if i was ok or what's wrong. it felt more of a "it'll look bad if customers see you crying" kind of offer.

so yeah i took up that offer and got home. chilled for a bit, feeling like shit. began perking up a smidge that i felt a niggling appetite come to me, so i made lunch. my brother came home, and shortly after, asked if i'd checked on the washing that was drying outside. i did, very loosely — i saw that it wasn't out the side but the back, poked my head out but was also like ... nah i feel bad it can wait. so i told him i'd checked briefly after coming home.

rather than being like "oh okay cool" he checked the back security cameras to see if i had. confronted me saying "what? thru the glass?" and i was a bit stunned but then said "yeah, i came back from work early after having two anxiety attacks so i felt like shit." he rolled his eyes at me and then refused to talk to me ..... like bro it's the fuckin washing. why are you checking THE SECURITY CAMERAS over my claim on the washing?

i broke my like 8 month record of No Suicidal Thoughts the other day but today was awful. just finished having a fat Depression Nap after losing all appetite and nothing helping me perk up. i laid in bed crying, those thoughts plaguing me.

so yeah. shit day y'all.

[elfenbensord]

hello love! i’m not sure if u still write for les mis but if u do, can i request a modern!enjolras x reader who struggles w anxiety/panic attacks? just lots of comfort and fluff<3

masterlist  /  requests

4.10.23

note: sorry for being several years late with this reply. also, this hit a lil close to home lol

modern! enjolras x gender neutral!reader

bad day

From the moment you woke up, you knew it wasn’t gonna be a good day. Your heart beat just a little too hard. Fingers numbing slightly at the tops. Breating felt like a task, instead of a comforting fact. You try your best to keep a smile on your lips, to get through your day without having it show. Fake it ‘til you make it, you thought.

After your last class, you were absolutely exhausted. Tired from the excess adrenaline rushing through your veins.-Tired of your brain being in constans, fight-or-flight mode. It made you feel like a caveman, like you hadn’t evolved from being chased by dinosaurs and gathering berries for dinner.

You finally made it home to your dorm. Feeling weak in you limps, you slouched down into the couch in the common room. 

Enjolras, a strawberry blonde majoring in political sciences with a too handsome smile for his own good, walked in. 

He gave you a smile. “Hey, you alright?”

“Yeah, just a bit frassled I guess.” You smile back weakly. “Didn’t sleep great.”

A small crease forms in between his eyebrows as he sat down beside you. “You sure? You look terrible.”

“Ever the charmer”, you bite back, a bit less sharp than usual. “I’m fine.”

He reaches for your hand, squeezing it lightly. Smiling softly he says, “You know you can talk to me.”

Like floodwork, the day’s challenges start to pour out of your eyes. “Sorry”, you splutter in between sniffles and drying your eyes with the back of your hand. “Sorry, I’m so embarassed.”

“No, no, no”, he assures you. “It’s alright. You’re alright.”

He moves to hold you closer, pulling you into a hug. 

“This alright?” he asks. 

You nod, mumbling a small, “Hmh. I just– Today wasn’t a very good day for me.”

“I get that.”

You feel his heart beat through his thin shirt. It’s a steady beat, calming your laboured breathing. He held you through your tears, until you’d calmed down. 

You felt your face turning hot red. “I’m sorry, again.”

He smiled softly, squeezing your hand again. “You really don’t have to be. I’m always here for you.”

You smiled back.

[evreeone]

a vent that seems tonally inappropriate in spots but if i give it the appropriate tone i think i might lose my mind (also i would recommend skipping if specific talk of Ways of Thinking When Mental Health Is at Its Worst and some physical health anxiety are something you'd like to avoid) ((also some political talk))i think i'm sort of on the cusp of a nervous breakdown and i might delete this later i just feel out of my mind

i have been extremely on edge lately and i noticed i'm starting to have heart palpitations with more regularity again (last time it wasn't anxiety but this time i think it is) and migraines and i think i've sort of shoved it into the background for the most part but in sort of checking in with myself today i realized i'm dealing with a sort of…background Ideation again. which--it's been a while since my mental health has been this low, but here we are.

i think a large part is the upcoming election. like, to be blunt, i do not think i will live through another trump presidency if that's the path things take. i don't Want to, so there's a chance i just Won't.

with the increase of struggles with what i definitely now (in the recent year) acknowledge as agoraphobia, my world has gotten…really fucking small. and whenever i stop to think of how little i am currently capable of as an adult and how i don't know if things will be changing any time soon i start to feel That line of thinking start to creep in, and compounding that with the fact that the world may became an outwardly hostile place for me to navigate again is just. i can't mentally come to terms with it.

covid sparked a lot of the agoraphobia, but trump's first presidency and the empowerment it gave to dogged right-wingers definitely contributed. (i mean, trump's response To covid also did just. compile things.) i live in a red city with no way out. i stopped feeling safe leaving my home, and then covid was a nail in a coffin so i just. stopped.

my brain is so fogged and scrambled right now i can't even properly articulate myself here because everything Bad is too loud for me to think, but i do think i will be taking a break from tumblr over the next month (and kind of already have been pulling away for a bit) because as much as i've tried to unfollow the people spouting the "i'm not going to vote" type posts i keep seeing it and seeing a pro-trump joke (don't care if it's a joke. shut the fuck up.) from some big tumblr account has sort of pushed me over the edge. to be blunt tumblr feels like it's mostly populated by white people who don't take trump seriously as a threat because they ultimately didn't have to deal with the threat he stirred the first time around. (i had a friend who voted for him as a joke the first time and now he gets anxious whenever he talks to his dad because his dad was so radicalized by trump he openly and vehemently talks about wishing he could kill all democrats. he now takes trump as a threat seriously, not just because of what trump himself can do but because of the way he encourages others to be just by being in power. he fucked around and found out, i guess, as much as a white person could.) i feel like no one in the 'won't vote' side actually had to deal with the uptick of racism and the threat of violence that came with trump's presidency. people see Not Voting as an option because they don't think a rise of fascism will Actually touch them. my mom has always said, growing up, that white people see options in situations like these where there are none because they don't see the fight because they've never Had to fight--they've never been at risk and believe they never will Actually be. it's easy to hem and haw in the face of fascism when your rights and treatment as a human being have always been pretty secure.HI HELLO HI this is evree from the future i deleted the majority of this post because i felt the anxiety of having a Hot Take opinion start to crash into the already existing anxiety and i feel now more out of my mind than prior when usually shouting into the void is a Boon tldr the upcoming election makes me want to kms but i am not an active at-risk risk! just the thoughts and feelings! i have resources saved for if the risk becomes active so do not worry about me! i will be Okay!

[wykedstories]

Chapter 5: The Gas Station.

I'm so happy the school day went fast and I'm now on my way back home. I'm actually excited to go home for once considering Mia is there and it feels like I haven't spent time with her in ages. Mia loves it when we paint together so maybe that's what I'll do when I get home. I can't stop thinking about that guy in the black hoodie today and how uncomfortable he made me. I can't pinpoint a reason why he made me so uncomfortable though. Maybe I'm just a big ball of anxiety. I constantly worry about literally anything. It's a wonderful way to live. 

There should be nothing about some random guy that is bothering me so much. I only saw him twice, but he gave me such a gut wrenching feeling both the times I saw him. I happened to glance down at my gas gauge and I got to stop to get gas, Oh how wonderful to have to make just one more stop when all I want to be is at home. The only real question I have is “ Why hasn't anyone invented the ability to teleport”? Either way, that's not gonna solve the problem that I still have to stop for gas. Here we go, down the long windy road to the nearest gas station to my house. Of course, leave it to me to almost be home and notice my car is almost empty. It's gonna be about 22  minutes one way to the gas station. That's 44 minutes round trip with perfect traffic, but you know that never perfectly works out. So let's shoot for a solid hour trip. That means I'll get home at approximately 6:30pm. I'm going to go home and paint flowers with Mia. I've been thinking so much about painting with her all day and that stupid guy in the black hoodie.

I asked Siri to turn on my road trip playlist which consisted of red hot chili peppers and nirvana and other similar genres. My favorite thing to do is play under the bridge by the red hot chili peppers as I go under the bridge right before the gas station. I have done it so many times that I know if i start my playlist at a certain point on the road the music will line up perfectly to that song and my favorite bridge. I realized very quickly that I was zooming around these curves way faster than I'm sure I should have been, so I turned the music down and I slowed down. I'm about six miles from the bridge which means I'm almost to the gas station. As I drive down the road I faintly see the bridge in the distance lit up by the bright lights from the gas station about a quarter mile behind it. 

It's very foggy this evening as dusk approaches. Instantly, my eyes drifted to the right side of the bridge where I noticed a dark figure. It can't be, there is no way that it's the guy in the black hoodie. I'm just seeing things I have to be. I cruised past the  bridge without looking to my right to see if a real man was standing there. I didn't want to look because I just wanted to get my gas and go home to paint flowers with my baby sister. I pulled into the gas station next to gas pump number Five. Pump five is my favorite pump, it's easy to access, particularly for my car. I conned myself into paying at the pump with tap pay, because I didn't want to walk inside alone in case that guy had been following me with bad intentions. I figured I would be safer beside my car versus walking all the way inside and back out alone. I got out of my car, and proceeded to walk over to the pump to pay for my gas. 

Thirty dollars in the tank. The wait is on as the gas flows out of the pump into my gas tank. I am ungodly anxious, was I just seeing things or was there really someone there. I glanced around and my gaze met the bridge, I noticed the figure I saw wasn't there anymore. In a sense I felt relieved that whatever I saw was not there anymore. The gas pump made that little clicking noise it makes when your gas is fully pumped. It made me jump just a little bit. Probably because it interrupted my flowing train of thoughts. I grabbed my receipt quickly and got back into my car. I turned the key, my car sputtered a little bit but, that is normal I just have to pump the gas pedal a few times while turning the key then it will start. I got it started, thank god. 

I turned out of the gas station when I almost hit someone who was walking right in front of the gas station exit. I looked a little closer and wouldn't you know it's Vince. He is in dark Black jeans, a dark green hoodie partially unzipped with a white tee shirt underneath. He looks right at me as I am stopped in the middle of the exit lane. He put his hand up, I rolled my eyes and then rolled my driver's side window down to talk to him. 

“Hey, What are you doing”? I snapped at Vince.

“I am obviously walking home what the fuck does it look like, If you paid more attention you would have obviously seen me crossing the road”? 

“Don't be an asshole, I'm not in the mood for anyone's shit today. I was zoned out. I have had an anxiety filled day today alright. Obviously you have had a bad day too. Would you like a ride home”?

“A ride huh, Well that's quite a nice offer after almost hitting me”.

“Yes a ride take it or leave it, if you want the ride get in and if not why don't you get out of my way so I can go home”. 

“I'll take it, are you sure that you are okay giving me a ride home. That's awfully nice of someone that doesn't really know me and I sure wasn't nice to you when you smacked your face on my locker”.

“ Just tell me the directions or put your address in my GPS and we will just go. I'm clumsy. What can I really say? Come on, I apologized”.

“ Yeah I know, you did apologize. I'm also very sorry for being a dick but I don't need any rumors here than there already are about me”. Vince somberly replied to me. 

“ I understand, There definitely are rumors going around. I don't really believe what people say though I like to hear people's stories straight from them”.

“Let me see your phone, I'll put in the directions to my house. Please dont judge me when you get there. Maybe if you don't hate me I can tell you my story sometime”?

I handed Vince my Phone, honestly I cant believe that vince is really sitting in my car and even more I cant believe that he even apologized for being an asshole. I can't wait to tell Darcy about all this. I handed Vince my phone. 

Then I replied “ I'd love to sit down and hear your story whenever you have time to tell it”. 

“I will keep that in mind, Thank you for being kind. There's not many people like that anymore”. He kindly said with a soft voice. 

I smiled at him and continued driving down this long tree lined country road, it is very aesthetically pleasing if i'm being honest. The GPS said that we have about 20 more minutes to his house.  This is not really what I want to be doing right now but I'm not complaining well. I guess I am but I shouldn't be since Vince was all I could think about a few days ago. So here I am sitting here in the car alone with him. We get to the stop sign at the end of the road. I look at the GPS and it says that we have about 12 minutes. I got this nervous feeling as my GPS yelled at me to turn right. At this point it's starting to get really dark out. I looked both ways before I took the right turn onto the next road. I took the turn and started my way down the next dark country road, I decided to look over at Vince and he was gazing out the window just completely relaxed. Maybe I was nervous because I was in the car with this guy who is a completely new guy in town that I was completely gawking over since he came. 

“Hey! Do you see that! Stop the car!” Vince Yelled! 

Completely startled I slammed on my brakes thinking it was a deer or an animal of some sort. I could only wish that's what I was looking at but, I knew as soon as I stopped the car that it was far from what I was looking at.

[abbysbasement]

wip list! longpost with a poll!

(divider - animatedglittergraphics-n-more)

currently have 20 reqs, trying to fill older ones first, but it mostly depends on which ones interest me the most at a certain time! Working on shorter ones tonight, but there are some longer ones I want to explore deeper! Here's a peek at some oneshots/requests that I plan on releasing, as well as some longer fics I have planned! And because I like to have fun here, you can choose which one you want released first!

not specially ordered or anything ;w;'

ONESHOTS/LONGFIC

(will be around the length of Morale Adjustment at minimum, or longer)

ABBY ANDERSON

THE Bespoke Abby Breeding Fic - TITLE: TOP DOG. Yes, the one I swore I would post like a week ago. It's super long and initially didn't have an intro so I've been working on it on and off. Partially in bulleted format, transitions to standard OS format after. 3k+ words. breeding, rough sex, blowjob/titjob, unprotected sex, creampies (lol), abby kinda babytraps reader. source universe, abby is slightly older than in canon (23-24ish), reader is younger (19-21?) and the wlf has actual ranks (translated: I looked up military rankings on google and started bullshitting) I wrote this on my period (translate: I'm a gross whore) abby is kind of mean but it's hot, get slutty about it. 90% completion. Has three (much shorter and more experimental) parts.

'You wanted to be wanted this way. To be desired and used completely, to be owned.'

The Bespoke Pornstar!Abby Fic - TITLE: XXX/RED LIGHT. The reader is a new rising star in the world of lesbian porn. One night, before your first anxiety-ridden scene, your costar arrives at your trailer to calm your nerves. Abby is the industry's top adult performer, practically the girl-on-girl bible famous for her rough, bad girl persona on stage, and her soft interior. You're given the persona of sex kitten; innocent, naive, and ready for the plucking, and in your first scene, her job is to break you in. Perhaps multiple parts, 3k+ words. Ellie is going to make an appearance as a 'rival' AV Performer, (but off camera her and Abs are good friends) who you'll have a later BD/SM scene with. Extremely rough draft, so no content tags yet.

"I'll do all of the work, baby. Just look straight in the camera and give your fans a pretty face to get off to."

The Bespoke Prisoner!Abby Fic - TITLE: DOIN' TIME (or something corny like that, we'll see.) When you're new in prison, they always tell you, go up to the biggest guy in the room and punch him in the face. Terrible advice, by the way. But when you're locked up on a misdemeanor and sent to a women's correctional facility, the rules are a bit different. So you find the biggest girl in the room, and you fuck her. Obviously. Extremely rough, no content tags. 3k+ words.

'Abby offered a deal; she gave you what you wanted, and you gave her what she wanted.'

The Bespoke and Formerly Scrapped College!Abby Fic - TITLE: PAPI BONES. Your roommate Dina drags you to a college frat party, and you hate it, all crowds and sweat and people. You wish you were home, but in a cruel twist of fate, a drunken game of spin the bottle turns into you, face to face in a dark closet with the captain of the rugby team and her head between your legs. studious!reader, jock/loverboy!abby, assplay, cunnilingus (r!receiving), fingering (r!receiving), primal!adjacent? i wrote in my editing notes, 'almost corruption, but pure?' so let that set the tone for you. potential part 2. Actually 90% complete, I just started beating myself up about it for no reason ;w;

"“s’okay baby, tell me how you want me. i’m yours.” and you thought that declaration would destroy you, ‘i’m yours.’  and it felt very, very real."

MINIFICS/DRABBLES (No poll for these because they'll all make it to the blog at some point)

ABBY

Bimbo!Reader x Abby Anderson (Mechanic!Abby? idk. She makes good money and reader is spoiled asl though.) dumbification, rough sex, there's a scene where reader sucks abby's strap while she's chewing bubblegum and licks the splattered gum off so there's that, spanking, face slapping, abby calls reader her fleshlight. partial HC/blurb format?

Semipublic sex with abby in her bedroom window

A/B/O WW Abby, breeding, half wolf!reader. she mounts and rawfucks you with her massive monster cock while you're in heat. primal, marking, too big cock/stretching pussy, mindbreak, impregnation. 2-2.5k.

ELLABS

Abby and Ellie are members of a rock band, you're a groupie and you'll do anything to get on the tour bus...

Abby and Ellie are both bad cops when it comes to training you, and they help the other keep you in line.

"Didn't she tell you to fucking behave?"

ELLIE

bully!ellie, dubcon/CNC esque? ellie steps on readers cunt with her boot. pussyslaps, knifeplay, degradation, she is not a nice young lady. 1.5-2k words.

dealer!ellie headcannons

ellie blasphemy kink oneshot

DINA/DINELLIE

Roommate dina corrupting innocent!reader. Somno, caring dom!dina, dina has a hairy pussy because I said so, dina takes reader's virginity with a dildo, sloppy makeouts, flashback of dina 💦 to the sounds of reader masturbating while thinking dina is asleep, Dina has big boobs and playfully does a cute boob comparison and plays w readers titties. this one might actually get pushed up because I'm thinking nasty ***** thoughts. you bump coochies with dina, that's the fic.

Your friend Dina takes you over to her sneaky link, and the campus dealer, Ellie's house. Unbeknownst to you, they invited you over to score in another way, too. dom!ellie, soft dom! dina, sub!ellie. drug use, strap on penetration, voyeurism, cunnilingus, cum swapping, mutual strap sucking, mutual masturbation.

yeah... that's all i got for you babies. enjoy.

[bananamarshmallowz]

Trans Rant

As a trans guy, I haven't been complimented in years like I use to.

The most I get is that I'm cute. And mostly from family members or strangers telling OTHERS that then tell me I'm cute.

My favorite color is pink, though it hasn't always been.

It was when I was in 1st and 2nd grade.

Then it was purple and blue in 3rd and 4th grade.

Red for 5th and 6th grade.

Then black in 7-10 grade.

Then I dropped out, I quit friends, I hated myself, I didn't know how to feel in my own skin. I gave up. I didn't care, I just wanted out of a system that didn't care about me. Everything was off, and no one was going to help me through it but myself.

I wore hoodies and sweatpants, cut and dyed my hair, acted different, talked differently, anything to change how people saw me.

No one called me cute... when I punched and kicked walls, slammed my door so hard it came off the hinges, threw things at loved ones, said cruel, mean, terrible things.

Then I grew into myself, found a much better way to live. To be myself.

Yes, I'm still angry but I don't show it to others as often as I did because I have scared myself and others with how much rage I have. So, I keep it hidden, I know how much anger and hate I have inside myself and I know that everyone's angry, at someone, at something, at some point in their lives.

But instead of taking it out on other people, I write it out, I paint it, I sketch it, I yell in my pillow and cry and laugh and sigh my rage.

I know how much I've grown. I found out how much I liked myself, started to get to know myself better, changed my name, did everything I could to be me.

To reach peace, you must know conflict. To understand how to escape conflict, you must go through it. Conflict is the opposite of peace but peace is the acceptance of conflict.

Other's will hate me for just existing. I am a force of nature, just like them. We are all human. Human species, human race. Skin, bodies, we all matter.

I am angry and calm and silent and people still call me cute.

I have been cute my entire life but it tastes different now. It doesn't taste as sweet like it's supposed to.

I can't say to people, "Stop calling me sweet." Because that's not who I am. I'm respectful, grateful, understanding. You're telling me what you think of me, thank you. I welcome you when you get home. I know my manners, I say please, thank you, excuse me, bless you, I hold open the door for people, I pick up trash when it's in my way. I hold my tongue when words aren't needing to be said. I think my actions through and think about others. They still and will probably always see me as sweet, cute, soft.

But I don't want them to.

I want to claw and bite and punch and kick and shout my way through shit. I have.

But I'll always just be cute.

It bothers me more and more. Each time someone says it. I've been called cute more times than I've been called handsome.

I've never been called sexy, hot, alluring, seductive by previous partners. Always just cute.

I like pink, I have a beard, I'm 5'4", I write terrible smut and things that should never see the light of day as far as I'm concerned; I think about ungodly things day and night, then write them out in excruciating detail and act like nothing happened the next day.

I struggle with anxiety, not as bad as I used to. I'm pretty sure I have undiagnosed autism. But I don't want to go to the doctors and get shot down just like previous attempts. I cut my own hair. I clean up after myself after everything. I do my own chores.

I'll always just be the cute friend. The cute cousin. The cute sibling. Cute.

And I'm sick of it.