#like the reason you do that is so people see it. not even necessarily to get them that mad but just like you are going to

[bulgik]

🫧 Manon Bannerman 𓄹⠀𓈒 ㅤׄ fri(end)s

𓈒 ゛⠀⎯⎯⠀Now i’m overpretending, so let’s put the end in friends.

Yn put the ‘end’ to their friendship, and Manon never understood why. That is, until tonight at the party, when they find themselves trapped in a bathroom together and have no choice but to lay bare the reasons behind their fallout.

Or: five times Yn gave Manon a reason to walk away, and one time she stayed anyway.

�𝗣𝗔𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 𓈒𓈒𓈒 Manon Bannerman ⋆ 𝑓𝑒𝑚 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 ・ 𝑤𝑐. 5.k ・ 𝑔. fluff. hurt/comfort —Friends to Enemies to lovers.

“Stop staring at me like that, your eyeballs are about to pop out.”

Manon snarled at the words.

“This is all your fault.” Her eyes bore into the girl sitting across from her, unfazed, as if she couldn’t care less about being trapped here.

Yn. The school’s volleyball team’s ace. School’s favorite girl. Manon’s least.

You might ask why, and Manon already had a list of five very solid reasons that had been burned into her mind over the years.

It started when they were younger, when they were friends. Yes, they were friends, as much as Manon hated to admit. Yn wasn’t always the asshole she was now.

“You have holes in your cheeks.”

Those were the first ever words Manon had said to Yn. The little girl puzzledly stared at her, looking half-scared, like Manon was some candy thief.

“Sorry?”

“When you smile.”

“Oh…” The ‘cheek holes’ resurfaced. “They’re called dimples. And they’re not holes…”

“Whatever. My mom told me I should ask you to play.”

“Okay…”

“What’s your name?”

“Yn.”

“Manon Bannerman.” She gestured at herself. “How old are you?”

“Five.”

“Nice, I won. I’m six. Now you call me Manz.”

They were next-door neighbors, and Manon was Yn’s first ever friend, since she was a newcomer at the time. Manon would describe young Yn as a snotty, chubby, yet adorable kid (she was lucky for having those dimples). Looking back, Yn should be grateful—Manon had helped her shape her social skills, dragging her around the neighborhood and introducing her to other kids.

Manon was the only one she had. Every day, they’d go to school together and walk home side by side. Yn refused to be separated from her even for Tuesday afternoons during her dance class.

“Manz, can I come to the studio with you?” Yn had asked her one time, eyes glistening with tears, just a snot away from crying.

Manon sighed. “No, you can’t.”

“But, why…?”

“Because you can’t dance too when I already do,” Manon huffed. “We can’t keep matching all the time. You’re gonna make their teasing worse.”

Their parents and friends would occasionally tease them as if they were items that came in pairs. A couple. It made Manon uncomfortable—or at least she was worried Yn was feeling uncomfortable. Yn was just her friend. People shouldn’t twist it into something else.

Yn pouted, adorably, almost like a puppy. “Then what do I do?”

“I don’t know… but stop whining like a baby.”

Simply put, they used to be inseparable.

Until one afternoon, when Manon came home from her dance lesson, hoping to find Yn waiting to play.

Only to see her playing volleyball—maybe the first time she ever played that sport—with the older girls in their neighborhood.

Yn, of all people, should’ve known that Manon hated to be left out. Sure, she could’ve joined in and played that stupid ball. Manon saw Haikyu!! once—she knew a bit about volleyball, like decoys, Hinata, and that being tall didn’t necessarily give an advantage in this sport.

She really knew nothing about it at all.

She had no option but to stare cluelessly as Yn played with the others. It wasn’t that she was bored. But when Yn was immersed in an activity, she wouldn’t notice anything else around her. And by anything, she meant Manon, herself.

At least Yn looked like she was having fun. But Manon couldn’t ignore the building anxiety gnawing in her gut at the sight—like she’d been replaced.

First reason Yn had ignored Manon all afternoon, replacing her with a group of Haikyu-wannabe girls.

“But, Manz, you said it yourself—I can’t join your dance class,” Yn explained as they walked to class the next day. “And those girls were so nice… They even taught me how to play.”

“I don’t care, Yn, you still ditched me,” Manon scowled.

The other girl grimaced. “You’re right. I’m sorry, Manz. It was just really fun. I can’t stop. You should join us next time.”

“No, thanks. I’d rather—”

Her words trailed off as her eyes caught on someone waiting outside their classroom. A man, young-looking, dressed in a long black sweater that made him look almost ethereal.

“Who’s that?” she asked, half-wowed.

Later, they found out he was Mr. Cho—their temporary art teacher. And possibly, Manon’s first ever crush.

Mr. Cho was warm and full of life. He always threw jokes that made every lesson feel alive, and to top it off, he was a dancer—just like Manon. With his long, silky hair and gentle demeanor, he looked like a prince straight out of the storybooks she used to read.

Naturally, Manon confided in Yn about her silly crush, making her sit through endless rambling about what went down with Mr. Cho each day.

“…and then he showed me his dance. It looked so pretty, Yn. He looked so pretty.”

Yn, barely glancing away from the volleyball match playing on the TV, huffed. “I’m still prettier than him.”

Manon sighed. “You’re a girl, Yn. You can’t be prettier.”

There was silence after that. She figured Yn was done entertaining her jabs. But then, she heard a quiet mumble—barely audible.

“You are.”

Manon froze. Unsure what to say—or whether she should say anything at all.

So she just brushed it off.

She never gave too much thought to the moment and eventually let it slip from her mind. But as time went on, she began to notice something strange. Every time she brought up Mr. Cho, Yn acted… off. Uninterested. Irritated, even.

It left Manon wondering—was Yn also crushing on Mr. Cho?

The suspicion only grew stronger when Mr. Cho asked her to perform a routine with him. She’d been thrilled—it would be her first time performing publicly, and she wanted everyone to see.

Yn was, of course, invited automatically.

“You have to come,” Manon had told her. “I won’t forgive you if you miss it.”

Yn promised she would.

But when the night came, she never showed up.

Second reason Yn, Manon’s best friend at the time, broke her promise and missed one of the most important nights of her life.

Yn had apologized, of course. And Manon eventually relented and forgave her after finding out she had a volleyball team trial that same evening. But Yn never really clarified whether she forgot to tell Manon about it—or chose not to mention it at all.

And judging by the way she’d been acting strange lately, it felt more like it had been on purpose.

“Do you think it’s weird when a girl kisses another girl?” Yn had asked one day.

Manon didn’t answer immediately, caught off guard by how sudden the question was. What a weird thing to bring up.

“Why do you ask?”

Her friend reacted like she’d been caught doing something illegal. “Uh… I don’t know—I just overheard some girls talking about it.”

Truthfully, Manon never really thought about it. For starters, she’d never seen one. She’d only ever seen her parents kiss. Or the people on TV. So she settled on the closest comparison her brain could come up with.

“Imagine us kissing, Yn. Would it be weird to you?”

Manon hadn’t meant anything serious by the question. She wasn’t even sure of her own opinion.

There was silence. Like Yn was really thinking about it. It got suspicious, and Manon turned her head just in time to catch her expression before she quickly responded.

“Yeah… yeah I guess it’d be weird.”

They never talked about it again. The young and shortsighted Manon—who easily forgot strange little things—never questioned how odd the conversation had actually been.

That is, until the accident happened.

They were in Manon’s bedroom, hanging out like usual.

“You won’t believe what happened today, Yn.” Manon flopped down onto her bed next to her, a huge grin on her face. “Mr. Cho kissed my head after I fell down the stairs and hit it.” She pointed to the crown of her head. “Right here!”

“It’s not that special, Manz.” Yn gave her usual flat response. Unimpressed. “I could do better.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Manon rolled to her side, facing her. “You think you can do better? What, like kiss me on the lips?”

Yn instantly sat up, ears turning red. “That’s not what I—”

“What’s stopping you then, huh? Do it. Kiss me on the lips.”

“Manz, stop it!” Yn shook Manon’s shoulder relentlessly.

But Manon only laughed and quickly looped her arms around Yn’s neck, locking her close. Their faces now barely an inch apart.

“Are you gonna kiss me now?” Manon teased. “What’s wrong? Afraid? Come on, Ynie. You said you could do better. Prove it—”

And before Manon could finish, Yn leaned in and kissed her.

She froze, stayed still. Yn’s lips were soft and fleeting. By the time Manon could process what had happened, Yn had already pulled back, face pale and horrified.

“Oh my god, Manz, I’m so sorry, Manz. I didn’t mean to—I just—”

Manon blinked at her, mind spinning and heart pounding. What just happened?

“It’s okay. It’s okay,” she finally said, though she wasn’t sure if she meant it.

It was as if her mind or maybe her heart was deciding whether they liked it or not.

“it’s not okay! I wasn’t thinking—I don’t know what I did—”

“It’s fine, Ynie, I—”

“It was a mistake!” Yn cut her off. “I’m sorry, Manon. It was an accident.”

That word—mistake—tugged at something inside of her. A tiny little pull in her chest. But she ignored it, assuming it was just some glitch in her heart.

“Okay.” Manon whispered, brain numb. “Let’s just not talk about this ever again then.”

Yn had agreed.

But nothing was ever the same after that.

Third reason. Yn stole her first kiss and said it was a mistake.

Time passed by and now they were in high school. Yn had grown fond of the sport, she joined the school’s volleyball team. “Volleyball gives me the distraction that I need, Manz.” Yn had said to Manon, though she never knew—or asked what distraction. She just knew Yn was living her best life.

Unfortunately for Manon, it was the opposite. She spent less and less time with the younger.

Yn’s little hobby sacrificed their little routines. Going home from school together was no longer an option since volleyball practice took over Yn’s afternoon. And then, when she was home, Manon waited on her home, the younger said she was too tired to play or even just for a little chat.

Manon could only say a pathetic, “I see… rest well then, Ynie.”

Only Mr. Choi noticed how she’d to hold back her tears that night.

Manon missed her best friend.

They barely even greet each other in the hallway anymore. Let alone, lunch. Yn would spend it with her teammates and new friends Manon didn’t even know about. Manon couldn’t help but feel Yn slowly pulling away from her.

Were they even still friends?

But thankfully, summer break came and Manon hoped it would make up for the time they missed. She'd been looking forward to their annual sleepover marathon. Maybe, Yn would tell her recent volleyball progress for Manon to catch up.

But then Yn dropped the bomb.

“I have a volleyball camp out of town, manz,” she had said, voice tinged with guilt. “I’m sorry.”

Manon had tried to play it cool. “Oh. When are you leaving?”

“…Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow?!”

“I thought I mentioned it before…”

“You didn’t!” Manon wanted to be mad, but she settled for an eye roll instead. “Fine. But you better text me. And call. No excuses.”

Yn gave her dimpled smile. “Of course, I will.”

And for the first two days, she did. Yn texted about how intimidating other kids’ skills were, how strict the coach was, they even had a late-night call once.

On the third day, Yn replied later than usual. And it gradually happened until she stopped replying to Manon’s text, let alone calling.

She told herself that Yn was just busy. Training must be tough. Maybe she was too tired to text. Maybe her phone died. Maybe—

But then Yn posted on her social media.

It contradicted all of her speculations about what might have happened. That was the moment when Manon realized.

Yn wasn’t busy. She'd simply ignored her.

Ghosted her.

And that was the fourth reason.

If Manon wasn’t an overthinker, she could just comment or DM Yn, like "hey, are you mad at me? do you purposely ignore my texts?"

But the more she mulled it over, she didn’t want to look pathetic, it was starting to feel one sided—like she was desperately trying to reach Yn. Manon just wanted to stop… reaching, and see if Yn would come back on her own.

A day before school started, Manon noticed Yn’s room glowing with vibrant lights from her window.

Weird. She didn’t even know Yn was back from camp.

Wasting no time, she went straight to the next door, knocking on the door out of habit.

Mrs. Laforteza’s face appeared from behind. “Ah, Manon, to what do I owe the pleasure today?”

“Hi, Mrs. Laforteza. Is Yn home yet?”

“Yes, since yesterday, sweetie. Didn’t she tell you?”

Manon weakly shook her head. A dull ache settled in her chest—disappointment, maybe. Or something else. A strange, creeping anxiety at the distance Yn had put between them.

“Oh… she must have just forgotten or was too tired,” Mrs. Laforteza tried to reassure. “Go on up, you know the way.”

An uneasy feeling settled in Manon’s stomach as she climbed the familiar stairs, making her anxious.

Then, just as she reached Yn’s door, she heard it—laughter. Not just Yn’s. There was someone else.

She swung the door open.

Yn was with another girl, not older than them. The vibrant lights turned out to be the TV glow. They were watching a volleyball match together.

“Manz!” Yn greeted, she couldn’t even mask her surprise on her face. “What are you doing here?”

“I didn’t know you got back yesterday, Yn.” Manon didn’t bother to subtle her irritation.

“Yeah… forgot to tell you.” Yn rubbed the back of her neck before motioning to the new girl . “Anyway, meet Megan. We were at camp together, and guess what? Turns out she lives just a few blocks away!”

Yn’s gaze flickered to Megan, who gave a polite nod. “Nice to meet you, Megan.” her voice was flat, distant. Then, turning to Yn. “Can I talk to you? Outside.”

Yn hesitated for a split second before excusing herself and following her out into the hallway.

As soon as the door closed behind them, she frowned, “Why are you acting weird, manz? You were kinda rude with Megan.”

The words went straight to her head. Did I really act weird?

Manon tried to reflect on why she was feeling this way. So annoyed. So betrayed.

Was I being rude to Yn’s friend because of it?

But the longer ahe thought, the clues were all pointed at Yn. She wouldn’t act like this if Yn didn’t make her guess why she’d been avoiding Manon but not other people. She wouldn’t act like this if Yn just… talked to her about what was going on with them.

“No!” she snapped, frustrated. “You’re the one who’s being weird! Why did you stop texting me during your camp?”

Yn blinked, clearly taken aback. “I mean… It was just for two weeks,” She brushed it off without showing any sign of regret. “Why are you being so clingy, manz?”

Manon felt something inside her crack.

“Clingy?” She scoffed, a mix of amused and disbelief. “Don’t try to gaslight me, Yn. You’re the one who ditched me out of nowhere.”

“What are you talking about?” Yn asked, her tone as sharp as the crease forming between her eyebrows.

“Ever since you've been focusing on volleyball, you’ve completely ignored me!” Dejection flitted in Manon’s voice, she whispered as she continued, “it feels like you're avoiding me.”

“I didn’t ignore you!” Manon flinched at Yn’s sudden high pitch, and she looked just as startled. “I just need space…”

“Right,” Manon ’s eyes were blank as she stared at the girl in front of her—the girl she used to be so close to. “The thing you gave to your Megan inside.”

Yn didn’t respond immediately, as if she knew she was caught with her own excuse. Her voice was softer when she spoke again, “Maybe I needed space from you, Manon.”

No Manz. Just Manon. Yn didn’t even shout, but her words shattered a part of her heart. What did I even do to Yn? The question floated in her head out of her anger and sadness.

Her body moved before she could think, stepping back as she felt the tears threatening to drop just a second away. Yn couldn’t see her crying like this.

“You know what, don't ever talk to me again.” Her voice was cold as ice. “Have fun with your new friend.”

Yn didn’t say a word.

Manon didn’t wait for her to. She turned and walked away.

It became the fifth reason. Yn just let Manon walk away from their friendship, no effort to make her stay.

And so it goes. The days when Manon was close to Yn felt like a lifetime ago.

After their friendship fell apart, Yn didn’t even seem to notice Manon’s absence. Too busy with her new friends—and her one and only volleyball. It was as if their friendship had never existed in the first place.

Manon could only be thankful that their parents never questioned the sudden distance between them.

That was fine. Manon had other things to focus on now.

Dance.

It consumed most of her time, filling the gaps Yn had left behind. She joined the school’s extracurricular club, trained hard, and for once, everything went well for her.

Until Megan showed up.

“Aren’t you Yn’s friend?”

“No.”

Megan tilted her head. “Pretty sure you are. You went to her house that day, right? Wait—Manon, isn’t it?”

Did I tell her my name that day?

“…Yeah.”

“Knew it.” Megan smiled excitedly. “You remember me? Megan.”

Of course I remember my replacement.

“Right.” Manon’s tone was flat, contrasting the latter’s. “Didn’t know you danced too.”

“I do a lot of stuff. Dancing, Singing, volleyball.”

“Sounds exhausting.”

Megan laughed smugly, couldn’t seem to sense Manon’s disinterest. “Anyway. I’m glad we paired up for the duet.”

Can’t say the same.

And just like that, Manon (begrudgingly) found herself acquainted with Megan.

To her reluctant surprise, the more time she spent with Megan, the more Manon realized she wasn’t as bad as she’d thought. At the very least, Megan made her grateful for their partnership—especially after seeing how some of her classmates struggled with their duet partners. Megan was incredibly talented at dancing.

But she was also ridiculously careless.

“Megan, here.” Manon handed her a flash drive containing their final dance choreo. “Our recording. Give it to Mr.Avanzini tomorrow morning.”

“Why can’t you do it?”

“Because I’m not coming to school tomorrow. I told you this.”

“Right. Dentist appointment.” After a while Megan groaned.

“What now?”

“I have a party tonight.”

“So?”

“I can’t promise that I won’t get wasted and miss school tomorrow…?”

Manon exhaled sharply. “Megan, I swear to God, I will drag you out of that party myself.”

“Please do.”

Manon rolled her eyes at the older’s lack of accountability. “Where is this party anyway?”

“Lara’s? I thought you knew… We celebrate Yn’s achievemet. She made it to the national youth team.”

The news sank in, making a strange hollowness in her chest.

So, I guess we’re already on that stage now. The stage where I hear about her life from other people.

“I told you—we’re not friends anymore,” Manon muttered, her voice quieter this time.

Megan shrugged. “Yeah? Doesn’t look like it.”

“Whatever. Let’s just start practice.”

They ran through the practice. Manon struggled to focus, she couldn’t stop thinking about the new information about Yn.

She was happy for her. But it felt sad Manon couldn’t tell it directly.

Though, in reality, she’d probably slap Yn first before Manon could congratulate her.

The moment they wrapped up, Megan quickly grabbed her phone, checking for the time. “Shit. I’m gonna be late.” She hastily stuffed up Her bags before standing up to leave. “Gotta go now, Manon. See you tomorrow!”

“Wait—the flash drive!”

But Megan had already closed the door.

Manon groaned, running a hand down her face. The deadline was first thing in the morning, and Megan was the only one who could submit it.

She had no choice.

She was going to that party.

Lara’s house was packed with drunk high schoolers from nearly every grade.

Which was no surprise. As the captain of the volleyball team—their school’s most popular sport—Lara often hosted parties, and students were always eager to join.

But it seemed like Yn had expanded her social circle too.

A massive banner hung across the living room.

‘Congratulations, Yn Laforteza! Our newest national player!’

Manon stared at it, the same strange, uneasy feeling settling in her chest.

The name—the person—once so familiar, now felt like nothing more than a stranger.

Shaking it off, she refocused on her mission.

Manon asked nearly a dozen people for Megan’s whereabouts before finally getting a lead.

“Upstairs bathroom,” a boy said.

So, she went.

Upstairs hallway was dim and the music faded in the background. The bathroom was weirdly unoccupied for a packed party like this.

But Manon, having zero sense of self-preservation, stepped inside anyway.

A second later, she realized why the bathroom had been empty.

It was a trap. A prank. And the victim stepped right after her…

Was Yn.

The bathroom’s door closed with a bang. She heard laughter outside

And that was how Manon ended up here.

Locked in Lara’s bathroom.

With her ex-best friend.

The person on top of Manon’s hate list.

“This is all your fault.”

“How the hell is this my fault, Manon?”

“If your friends weren’t completely idiots, they’d be more careful with their pranks—like, I don’t know, not locking random people inside.”

Bitterness lodged in Manon’s throat, it had been a while since she talked with Yn. She had mixed feelings. Built-up irritations and something like… longing.

“Oh, so now you blame my friends?” Yn scoffed, shaking her head. “This was supposed to be my trap.” She leaned closer like she was inspecting Manon. “This is on you. Why did you come to this bathroom? Matter of fact, what are you even doing here? At my party.”

Manon’s jaw tightened. She hated how Yn said it. My party. Like it was some exclusive thing Manon had no business being at.

“I came here to give this to Megan.” She lifted the flash drive between her fingers.

“Oh?” Yn said half-amused, half-bitter. “So you guys are friends now, huh?”

Manon narrowed her eyes, annoyed. “We’re dance partners. So what?”

“Funny,” Yn muttered. “You were being dramatic when I started hanging out with her.”

Manon exhaled. She needed to stay calm. “It’s different.”

Yn let out a humorless laugh. “Different how?”

Manon could answer, oh, because you were in position of ignoring me at that time, said you need some space but surprise, Megan was there. Manon could say, because you were acting like a jerk.

But she chose to reply, “Just… the situation. You wouldn’t get it.”

“You’re so complicated, Manon,” Yn whispered, as if she was disappointed. “I can never understand you.”

“You’re one to talk. Remember when we’re still friends, Ynie?”

Yn visibly gulped as she braced for Manon to continue.

“Should’ve stopped being friends when you ditched me for your stupid volleyball.”

“It was a long time ago, Manon! And I did that because you wouldn’t let me join your dance lesson!”

“Oh, that was just the beginning,” Manon spat, filled with hurt more than anger now. “Then you missed my first-ever public dance performance because of that stupid volleyball trial you didn’t even bother telling me after it was over!”

Yn’s mouth parted slightly, caught off guard. “I didn’t know it was important to you—”

“It was! You were my best friend, Yn!” Manon’s voice cracked, the words tasted sour on her tongue. “But you let me walk away from our friendship… You didn’t even try to make me stay. Why?”

A heavy silence filled the space between them, years of suppressed confusion and anger finally out. For the first time since the argument started, Yn didn’t try to shoot back another defensive remark. She just sat there, Her gaze blank as she stared at the floor, as if she was reliving in Manon’s pain, or maybe in her own.

“I…” Yn finally spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. “I thought it was for the best for us…”

Manon let out a bitter laugh, but it came out choked. “Fuck you!” her tears were falling now. “You don’t get to decide that! You even ghosted me weeks before it all fell apart!”

Yn’s eyes flickered with something unreadable—regret, maybe. “I didn’t ghost you, Manon.” her voice wavered, hesitant. “I was… I was trying to figure out my feelings.”

Manon froze. “What?” She wiped the tears from her cheeks. “What… what do you mean, Soobin?”

Tears now glistened Yn’s eyes. “I like you, Manon.”

Manon blinked. The words barely registered. “Wait—” her heart pounded, confusion clouding his thoughts. “What did you just say?”

“I like you,” Yn repeated, steady this time

Manon’s breath hitched. It didn’t make sense. It couldn’t make sense. her mind spiraled, searching for cracks in Yn’s words, for proof that this wasn’t real. Flashback flooded in—every time Yn pushed her away, every moment she chose something, someone, else over her.

“No.” Manon shook her head. “No, you don’t.” her voice trembled, not with anger or pain, but with fear. “You pushed me away. You left me. You don’t like me.”

Yn slowly moved closer to reach for Manon, but she pulled away.

“Manon, I did it because I didn’t know what to do with my feelings.” She took a shaky breath, now sitting cluelessly right before she could reach Manon. “Every time I tried to accept it, you’d say or do something that—That scared me.”

Manon’s pulse roared in her ears. She didn’t know what was worse—the years of hurt resurfacing, or the new discovery behind it, might have been nothing like she thought.

“Like what?” Manon asked.

“I… I always thought you didn’t like it when people ship us together. You always acted uncomfortable and it hurted.”

“What?” Manon’s eyebrows furrowed. “No, no, that’s not what happened… I thought you were the one who uncomfortable—”

“And the kiss.”

“What kiss—” Manon’s eyes widened in realization. My first kiss. “You’re the one who said it was a mistake!”

“It was never a mistake!” Yn stuttered. “I—I was waiting for your reaction but… but then I suddenly remembered the time when I asked you about two girls kissing and you said it’s weird—”

Manon felt like a constant wave of realization hit her mercilessly.

“But I had already done it. I kissed you. And I freaked out—”

“Yn.” Manon moved closer, closing the gap between them. “Hey, look at me.” She gently grasped Yn’s face, forcing her to focus.

Yn’s frantic eyes finally meet hers.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you felt like that.” Manon’s voice was soft, hoping to calm Yn down. “It was my first kiss, Yn. I was just as shocked as you are.”

Yn’s breathing evened out as her panic faded. Manon couldn’t help but flash a fond smile. All these years and it was just a series of miscommunication.

“So, your kiss wasn’t a mistake?” Manon asked again, just to make sure.

Yn shook her head. “No… never.”

“I’m sorry…” Yn whispered. “For everything. For pushing you away. For ended things and didn’t stop you. I ruined our friendship because of my feelings. I’m selfish—”

“Hey. Stop.” Manon went for a hug, her voice was calm as she spoke softly in Yn’s ear. “It’s not just you, okay? I should’ve asked before it was too late. We should’ve talked instead of assuming things.”

Manon exhaled, her mind reeling from everything they had just admitted. She finally realized that the pain of Yn leaving wasn’t just about betrayal—it was about fear. Fear of losing her.

“It’s too late isn’t it?” yn asked, making manon let go of her embrace and stare at Yn confusedly. “Our friendship… it ended.”

Manon let out a small chuckle. “We can start over.” her heart pounded as she looked into Yn’s eyes. “Or, we can turn it into something new.”

“Something new?”

Without wasting more time, Manon leaned in, her lips brushing against Yn’s. It was hesitant at first, almost as if asking for permission, but when Yn didn’t pull away, the kiss deepened. It was soft, full of everything they built up over the years—apologies, confessions, and yearnings all at once.

When they finally pulled apart, their foreheads rested against each other, breaths mingling, lips tingling. A small smile played on Manon’s lips, mirrored by Yn’s.

“I missed your cheeks holes,” Manon murmured, poking in Yn’s dimple.

Yn laughed wholeheartedly, as if she just had her best moment of the day. “I miss you too, Manz.”

“So, you’re back to calling me Manz again, huh?” Manon teased, too happy to not to. Yn laughed harder.

And then as if on cue, the door cracked open. A familiar face popped behind the door.

“mei…”

The girl stared at them knowingly, amused. Manon was suddenly aware of the position they were in. “I knew it.”

They hurriedly scrambled to get up.

“Is Yn still your friend now, Manon?”

“Shut up Megan.”

[antianakin]

A number of people have responded to this post with something similar to this and I think this post is getting misunderstood as me arguing that I think Cassian should know about all of the things Bail has done, and it's not. That's not what I'm saying.

I'm bringing up all of these things Bail has done because it felt to me less like this is a moment where we're supposed to just see Cassian as wrong or biased, and more of a moment where the narrative VERY GENUINELY wants you to agree with Cassian that the only reason any of them are even here right now as a rebellion is because of Luthen.

For one, Cassian's sole reasoning behind why he believes the information is because "Luthen died for it" and that faith (as well as Kleya's) is ultimately what helps sway Vel into convincing Mon Mothma to believe it and stand up to Bail about it. It's BAIL who has to sit there being wrong and just be the "man Cassian doesn't like."

For two, this entire arc really focuses in on Luthen's legacy and influence, so it doesn't make a lot of sense for the ultimate message at the end to be that Cassian's just biased and wrong about Luthen's impact on the rebellion.

For three, Gilroy apparently has said in an interview that he sees Luthen and Mon Mothma as the true founders of the rebellion in his version of the story.

For four, they decided to have Bail's team be compromised in the episode with Mon's big speech so that Luthen can step in with his better knowledge and agents to ACTUALLY save her but then the "Gold Squadron" (who are also part of Bail's group) insist that they have to step in and deliver Mon Mothma to Yavin, leaving Luthen and Cassian's work essentially unrecognized. While this fits in quite nicely with the themes of Rogue One and the ways that so many people often end up unremembered by history no matter how important they are, it is also worth bringing up in this case because it's another instance of "Bail's way fails, and Luthen's succeeds because he's just better at it."

For five, Cassian wouldn't know about all of the little things Bail has done, but Rebels has made it fairly clear that Bail DOES take part in some of the recruitment work and meetings within his own rebel cells. It seems INCREDIBLY unlikely that Cassian is unaware of just how long Bail has been doing this and how much of what's here is a direct result of Bail's work for the last 19 years bringing it all together. He doesn't have the DETAILS, sure, but he's been in Bail's rebellion for two years now, you cannot convince me that he doesn't know ANYTHING about Bail's involvement in it and the fact that he literally founded it.

I would mind this a lot less if it felt like we as the audience were supposed to understand that Cassian is just being emotional and kind-of biased because a mentor of his just died, but that doesn't feel like the way it was being presented to us. You CAN interpret it that way, but that doesn't necessarily mean that's the way it was intended to be understood.

So the reason it felt important to me to bring up the fact that Bail has absolutely been established as being there from DAY FUCKING ONE with the things he did to help the Jedi and what he did for Leia isn't to say that Cassian should KNOW these things, but to point out that the narrative in Andor seems to be acting like those things don't count or is just ignoring them to favor Luthen and Mon because Gilroy prefers them. But they DID happen and they DO count and Bail Organa is just as much if not more responsible for that rebellion's existence than Luthen Rael. I LIKE Luthen, I think he's a fascinating and complex character, and I am perfectly happy to give him his roses for what he HAS done, but what I won't do is devalue or dismiss Bail Organa's contributions to lift up Luthen as the true founder of the rebellion.

It seems a little hilarious to me that they have Cassian making the argument that the only reason any of them are here, the only reason the REBELLION exists at all, is because of Luthen... and he's saying it to BAIL FUCKING ORGANA.

I'm sorry, but while I am happy to accept that Luthen did do a LOT of things to keep the rebellion alive and likely recruited quite a few of the people on Yavin to this cause himself and trained them up, there are just as many if not more who are there explicitly because of BAIL ORGANA.

Bail Organa who began fighting the Empire the moment he showed up at the Jedi Temple the night of Order 66 and turned around to save any Jedi he could and then became a GETAWAY DRIVER as Yoda went to assassinate the Emperor and then proceeded to agree to take in Anakin Skywalker's child in order to hide her from the Empire.

Bail Organa who has literally been shown helping recruit the entire Ghost Crew and likely brought on the entire Phoenix Squadon and theoretically the entire Gold Squadron. Bail Organa who was the one who helped Riyo Chuchi try to fight for clone rights. Bail Organa who saw Ahsoka Tano on Naboo for Padme's funeral and immediately turns around to offer her a chance to join the rebellion which she does eventually choose to take. Bail Organa who eventually does allow his own DAUGHTER to join the rebellion and run missions when she's old enough.

You cannot convince me that somehow Luthen Rael is MORE responsible for the creation of the rebellion and its existence and people's involvement in it than Bail Organa. You can't.

[mvdtu3]

No action this week but I am completely fine with that. The tension is racketing up and there were so many cool reveals and moments this episode, I can't wait for next week.

There's a lot of good character stuff with Machu and Nyaan this episode alongside some great Zeta Gundam callbacks that make me really excited for where the show might go.

Some miscellaneous detailed thoughts on the episode, goes on for a bit:

I for some reason didn't expect Annqi to be the one to betray the main trio, but it was the most obvious choice in retrospect. Now not only is Machu rejecting her normal life (seen through the scenes with her mother and teacher this episode), but now the people she thought she could trust outside the norm are rejecting her. The only real option for her left is to forge a new path with Nyaan and Shuji (given that Challia seems to know about both her and Nyaan at this point, so she probably can't return to a normal life anyway).

I'm glad that the conflict between Machu and Nyaan seems to be repairable, she's still able to go to Nyaan for help at the end of the episode, they will definitely make up in time. Interestingly this seems to be the first time in the show that Nyaan has shown any real interest in Shuji, is Kira-Kira really that good?? She still seems to hold a primary interest in Machu, expressing a desire to be with both of them, rather than just one.

Despite what the show is indicating I'm still not sure whenever Challia is actually planning on killing Kycilia or not. Looking back at the extended movie version of episode 2, Char didn't seem to tell anyone, even Challia about his plan to sabotage the operation to stop the Solomon drop, so I don't think that Challia was necessarily aware of, or onboard with his plans to kill the Zabis. Meaning that if he is trying to kill Kycilia , then it was probably a desire formed on his own after the One-Year-War.

And now for the big one, the introduction of Bask Om, Gates Kapa, Deux and the Psycho Gundam. It makes sense that people who were in the Titans in the main UC would become powerful in the GQ universe too, there's probably a lot of people who harbor similar views to the Titans on GQ Earth after their loss to Zeon. I'm really interested to see what they do with Deux (before she inevitably dies) as there are some neat parallels to the main trio you could make with a character like her. I'm also just really excited to see more aspects of Zeta Gundam coming into this show (Bask vs Challia as well, maybe?).

I'm glad that we got a brief break from the action, and GQuuuuuuX has proven that it can handle more plot focused episodes well, not just action. I'm really excited for shit to hit the fan next episode with what looks like a big fight with the Psycho-Gundam inside the colony, everything crashing down on the main trio with Annqi's betrayal, and the plot about Kycilia , looks like a stacked feast for next week. I wonder if Machu is going to steal the Pomeranian's share of the winnings to fund an escape for Nyaan, Shuji and her, now that she knows she's been betrayed and knows where the money is. I wonder if Machu's eyes turning bright red in the preview indicates that a new function of the Omega-Psycommu will be revealed next time to.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

I will say that in addition to toxic positively in fandom spaces there is a counterpart to it that I have repeatedly noticed. This was more immediately apparent in some spaces that I'm in like Magic, where it's fairly common to see people who complain about virtually everything under the sun, even in ways that are contradictory. It's something I've called "Communally Enforced Dissent" because it is usually a result of a desire to keep opinions about something...low. But maybe this is toxic negatively in the same vein.

I will admit to a rather bad habit of mine as of late: when I disagree with someone about something, I will actually usually some time later check in on them, usually popping onto their blog, to see if something has changed. I think that what motivates this is the desire to see people as...individuals who are not necessarily so invested in their opinions that they become obstinate: they are capable of engaging with a topic and its dialogue.

Like, for example, I think the most salient critique of Mon3tr's design is that it could be less cute. This is not necessarily a critique I find to be that important, but I can understand where its coming from. I can disagree but like nod my head that I think it is a salient critique. So I was curious on the opinions of a couple of individuals who I won't name here for the sake of not like causing trouble now that some time has passed.

Have their opinions on Mon3tr changed, now that there has been quite a bit of fandom discussion about the ways in which Mon3tr reads as very transgender, especially from many of the transfem bloggers in the community? As one of them put it, art should be debated and discussed. Are they doing that?

Well no. As far as I can tell, they've not even bothered to discuss the topic at all since then. That sentence I brought up was complaining about going onto the Arknights subreddit (L O fucking L sorry but I also lurk that subreddit and shit is dire) and getting downvoted for criticism, and it highlighted that these people don't...actually want discussion. Like if you want to talk about, for example and not an opinion attributed to any of the people I'm talking about, Integrated Strategies being a bad game mode, I can understand the frustration when you run up against the fact that Integrated Strategies is very popular.

I don't think it's a bad game mode. I do think it has problems, there have been design choices both in the past and recently that are concerning. IS5 in particular I think is not a very well designed version and I vastly prefer IS4. But if your goal is not to actually have discussion but batter me down until I agree with you, that's not actually a discussion.

I will say, and quite publicly, that there are reasons for disliking Mon3tr's design that are quite revealing of internalized misogyny. I do not think they are legitimate complaints and are actually people being very weird about women. But when it comes to like, the direction of the game and the story or about specific plot beats I can see there being a lot to discuss. I have a post constantly brewing in the back of my mind about Kal'tsit and how...well resurrection isn't an inherently bad plot beat. But I haven't made it because I'm primarily waiting on the content that either doesn't exist yet or is untranslated.

If you want Mon3tr to be more monstrous, I will disagree with you: I think that her character design is well supported all things considered. But I think that is a critique that is reasonable even if we disagree. Discussion doesn't result in everyone coming to a consensus with each other you know. :)

[the-red-thread-that-strangles]

☠️🔻♥️ penny for your akai thoughts? 🥺

Hehe thank you for the ask, Celine

(ask meme here, musings and ramblings under the cut)

✨🚬 Akai Shuuichi🪗✨

☠️ Angry/violent headcanons

This is difficult to answer for me, but I think separating the two aspects of this category will allow me to consider both carefully. The problem is, I'm a big proponent of Akai being too numb to get angry. After all, this is the man who smiled at the guy who killed his girlfriend and called him his "beloved enemy". And while I do believe that his dramatic disney princess haircut upon hearing of Akemi's death was partly motivated by anger (and probably alcohol), I think it was mostly grief that drove him to it. Akai Shuuichi's anger, when it does exist, is cold and callous, because he knows he'll get what he wants eventually - or die trying.

If anything, I think he's the type to internalise the anger and turn it inwards. I wonder if the alcohol and cigarettes are a form of self-harm through negligence. Does he think he doesn't deserve better than this, seeing as he's just a tool of violence and death?

Now, the violence aspect is much more interesting. I think that to Akai, violence is a tool. He's not necessarily drawn to it, but he's used to it, and he wields it well. When I first started researching the psychology of people exposed to violence, I learned one very important thing: spies, policemen, soldiers, and other people exposed to violence are not fighters. Akai is not a fighter. Fighting is a ritual, usually done in social situations (to establish dominance, power, etc), with certain rules. If you are forced to fight, you have already lost the pre-confrontation stage of the altercation, the planning, the opportunity to simply crush your opponent with overwhelming force and violence.* I think that Akai excels at this step (he has to, as a sniper), and that he's capable of impressive displays of violence without blinking. It's as much a deterrent as a tool - after all, people will get the message to not try to mess with him if he crushes his opposition mercilessly. We've all spent a lot of time thinking about how Calvados and Kusuda would rather die than deal with Rye, and how the BO has kill-on-sight orders for him. I think it's because of his skill at inflicting violence. He's not cruel - leave that to Bourbon - but he's cold, merciless, and somehow, that's worse. You can't taunt him, can't reason with him. Once he's got you in his sights, you will eventually perish. That's the grim reaper for you.

And he won't even feel bad about it.

*Side note, but this made me think again about how cute the Ferris Wheel fight is, and how much Akai is indulging Rei there. He's meeting Rei where he's at, playing with the rules Rei presents without speaking, without intent to seriously harm, even dragging him back from certain death. Hell, all the while he's handicapped by his rifle case, and the enemy is coming. Akai should be way too smart to indulge like this, but he clearly is, and that's so cute.

🔻 Childhood headcanons

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Akai Shuuichi was daddy's little boy. I'll die on the hill that he first handled a rifle at a very young age when Tsutomu took him on hunting trips.

Other than that, I like to think he used to be a quiet kid, preferring to read over talking to others. In the plant one shot, I wrote teen Akai hiding behind the branches of his willow and reading, and that visual stuck.

I like to think he smiled more, and more genuinely too. Imagining small Akai all bashful because he stayed up too late and Mary caught him reading Holmes novels under the blankets with a flashlight gives me joy. ("You're going to ruin your eyesight", she chastised, and now look where we are. Mr. 20/20 long distance sniper really showed her. Actually. I think Mary should meet Okiya with his glasses, and chastise him for finally needing them. Akai can't well refute her, because he does need them; granted, it's for disguise purposes and not to aid his vision, but she has a point. Also, moving away from the childhood hcs, old man Akai with glasses is peak 🙏 )

Also I imagine Akai not really knowing what to do with his little brother, and Shuukichi trailing after him like a little duckling. Imagining Akai reading him bedtime stories to get him to calm down is soothing my heart.

Oh and lastly, our beloved little pale grim reaper got sunburnt easily I'm sure. Now, this might not have been a problem in England due to the mostly rainy weather, but I bet there exists a photo of a young Akai who could pass as a lobster from when they visited Japan in the summer time.

❤️ Family headcanons

I'm not really sure what to say here aside from Akai clearly being a family man, even if he's not too great at showing it. He cares about his siblings and is fond of his mom, even estranged as they are, and if anybody hurts them, he retaliates at full force.

This also applies to Yumi, as Shuukichi's fiancée, and probably will also apply to whoever Masumi drags into the mess that is the Akai family. Rip Ran or Momiji or-

I think Akai has been away for so long that he doesn't really know how to interact with his family; there will probably be a bit of a reality check for Masumi at one point when she realises that the cool brother she idealised is cool, but also emotionally detached, and probably traumatized. Still, I think she simply won't leave him the option of running away again, and he's going to be the laid back and terribly enabling uncle for his nieces and nephews (of which there will be many, I am sure).

I also think that Akai and Shiho's bond should be further explored. I think Shiho benefits a lot from not being as alone as she thinks in the long run. Granted, she'll probably get along better with Masumi than Akai (a low bar to clear, I know), but she will eventually have to address the Akemi situation. And there really isn't anybody left who could mourn her, aside from the pair of them. So, as much as she doesn't like Akai, I think they should mourn Akemi together, and move on together. Also, as a bonus Crack idea I want them to go to some sort of mystery dinner together and have them crack the whole case before they're even finished with the entrees. Let them be smart together. Augh. Also Akai attending the defense of her PhD...

I think I should stop now, at this point I'm projecting XD

Thanks again for the ask ^^

[ulteri0rm0tives]

....and if I said I wanted Johnny and Kerry in the messiest divorce arc since Paul McCartney and John Lennon.. what then...

[zakiyah]

.

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

wanna ask how you feel about the eridan bpd headcanon/theory(?? not sure what to call it!) you're so good at your character analysis and i'd love to see your outlook on it

Since I don't have a degree or any formal training in psychology, I feel deeply uncomfortable diagnosing characters. I've made an autism joke before but only because I'm on the spectrum. He's definitely traumatized and anxious, but I mean those as descriptors of his behavior rather than capital-D Diagnoses. I try to focus on those when I can - the cause and effect of cognition, self-image, and behavior - and those factors may very well match up with DSM criteria, but I try not to touch an actual diagnosis with a ten foot pole unless the author has explicitly stated that X character has Y condition.

[hermitcraftx]

just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.

no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this

[pickaropoprocks]

Day 42!! My take on a Mafukasa swap!AU!!

[fantasmadelaciudad]

unfortunately despite all of the actual issues i have with hamilton it's still one of my favorite musicals ever. everything about it makes me so so crazy i can't even put it into words.

[uncanny-tranny]

Maybe it's just me, but part of why I never really felt completely secure in being public about my own artistic endeavors was how... being proud of yourself in any capacity for any reason is almost a faux pas, if that makes sense.

I've noticed how it's almost expected to perform the air of humility, but is that humility? Is it humility to say, "Oh, I'm sorry for clogging your feed with my awful art" or anything to the effect of self-deprecation?

I think that's why I so often gravitate toward those who make "bad art." There's a sense of freedom that is only achieved with the level of hubris that being unashamed in the number of people who hate your art. I wonder, though, how many people don't hate the art as much as they hate that they can't chastise the artist into humility, into recognizing how "terrible" an artist they "actually" are?

[jubileebloom]

I aspire to be a lover not a hater. but

[allisonreader]

My heart hurts. Not physically, but emotionally. I don't like the news, I tend to avoid actively searching it out, for that exact reason. I ache because as people we just can't seem to get along. Learn to compromise and fully try to understand the other side. It's exhausting to understand why people are against certain things, even when it's the opposite of what I personally believe in.

[age736]

For the Greater Good

Perhaps you do not believe what you are doing can truly be classified as evil. Perhaps some people will be hurt from the immediate consequences of your actions, but what the masses fail to see is the immense good that will come of your plans. Maybe you act in the name of science, or for your people who have fallen on great tragedy. Maybe you see cracks in a failing system and want to uproot it through chaotic, destructive means to avoid greater tragedy down the line. Maybe you're just in with a bad crowd, but you can't leave them, no matter how unsavory their intentions, because they're your only ticket to your ultimate goals. No matter what, your goals are noble, and you take no joy in wreaking havoc or hurting those in your way, but the evils you partake in are necessary. If you need to play the bad guy to ensure a better future, then you are willing to play that part.

tagged by: @acoldsovereign tagging: idk take it if u wanna

[notmoreflippingelves]

So I know, I know, we all hate it when people add comments and especially lengthy ones to posts that are no openly encouraging them. Nevertheless, I'm gonna do so in this particular case because the novel that I was writing in the tags just got too too long and I was frighteningly close to the tag limit.

The things that would fix Esteban Flores are (in roughly this order)

A found family (preferably one totally divorced from connections to his bio family) and/or a small child to take care of.

A heartfelt apology from his biological family (definitely Luisa, probably Elena, and maybe Francisco as well).

A hug x1000

Being shaken

Enough sleep

But most especially the first two.

Esteban's issues stem from being made to feel like an afterthought and/or an obligation to his family of origin. In his mind, he was not chosen or wanted. He was liked, loved even--but he was loved because he was familia--not because he was Esteban. He was not enough in and of himself, especially not when compared to Elena.

Do you know why he continued to tend the cacao trees during the Dark Times? Yes, it was out of love for his family, but I think there's a bit more to it than that. His abuela shared something private and meaningful (i.e. how to take care of the cacao trees) with him that she didn't also share with Elena. He was welcomed into Luisa's world--if only for a moment. This was his, the rare thing that he didn't have to sacrifice to or share with Elena. No one could take this away from him--the moment of feeling seen and chosen. Not even the fact that this moment was very very much an anomaly and the rest of his youth (and his adulthood) consisted of him being shoved into the corner of some family portraits and left out of others entirely---and no one noticing this for years.

In "Something I Would Never Do," Esteban outright states "Years ago/ I did not know/Just how much they cared for me." He's just now realizing after 40+ years that his family just might love him (50+ years if you go back to when Esteban moved into palace); he's genuinely surprised about it and terrified that he's going to fuck it all up. Yes, Esteban has atrocious self-esteem, but these impressions did not come from nothing. Even now, his family keeps him largely at arm's length. He doesn't appear (or isn't even mentioned) in the two family vacation episodes, suggesting he was left behind. His Navidad plans (the ones he has been dreaming of , all alone for 41 years!) are rejected outright by Luisa, and no one even bothers to ask what the Dark Times were like or how he is coping. Everything has changed and yet nothing has changed. He's there, sometimes he is shown attention and affection, but he's still made to feel that he's not really a part of the family in the same way the others were.

All this is pretty bad in and of itself, but it's made worse by the fact that he's not getting his emotional needs fulfilled from outside the family any more than he is within it. As far as we can tell, Esteban's only real friends as a child were Elena and Victor. (Maybe Felicia as well, but she was far more Elena's friend than his). And neither Victor nor Elena could give Esteban what he needed: the feeling of being liked and chosen for himself and that alone.

Elena is family--the same family has made Esteban feel like an afterthought and obligation, merely liked at best and tolerated at worst. But that's oversimplifying things. Elena is also the impossible gold standard that Esteban will always be measuring himself against. (And it's especially galling that she was 1-2 years younger than him, and he was still nowhere near her level). She's the favorite (and Luisa is not subtle about hiding that fact), the priority, the important one. She's the one who has always been and will always be secure in power and confidence and their familia's love--the exact opposite of Esteban.

Victor, meanwhile, was a horrible influence on Esteban, and not just where Shuriki was concerned. His selfishness rubbed off on his amigo, and his competitiveness and callousness brought out every one of Esteban's insecurities and worst tendencies. It's also very strongly implied that their friendship (at least on Victor's side) was rooted in how 'useful' Esteban was. Through El Segundo, Victor got closer to power/the crown and also found someone that he could feel "superior" to. Someone that Victor could consistently beat at races, so that he could feel like a winner. Someone who wouldn't tell Victor to go to hell if he subjected unflattering nicknames upon.

So yeah, Esteban's childhood primary source of affection/attention outside his family were two people who exacerbated Esteban's already huge inferiority complex. One of whom was part of said family that enabled said inferiority complex in the first place, and the other of whom is wrapped up in the event that caused Esteban to lose his family as well.

And then, Elena was trapped in the amulet and Victor was banished from Avalor, and Esteban was without anyone at all for 41 years. His primary source of attention and affection during this time was the woman who conquered his kingdom and took away his family. Someone who had preyed upon his vulnerabilities from the very start and who kept him alive only so long as he remains obedient and "useful" to her. There's nothing even remotely close to equal or mutual about this dynamic, and Shuriki did even more damage on Esteban's already battered psyche than all of the others combined and multiplied by ten.

Even after Shuriki is gone, Esteban still doesn't have anyone in his life that voluntarily chose to be in his life. His entire social circle is comprised of people that he knows through his family and/or his role as chancellor (and later his magical abilities). There's Naomi, except there isn't, because their dynamic is rooted exclusively in their shared devotion to Elena and their roles on the Grand Council (which is also directly tied to Elena).

Similarly, Doña Paloma interacts with Esteban almost exclusively in reference to his role as Chancellor. Would she give him the time of day if he had no political power or influence?. Doubtful, especially as she seems to really dislike him most of the time. There's a bit more potential for a genuine friendship to develop with Julio or Professor Mendoza, but again, these connections were formed through Esteban's job and we don't really see any interactions that aren't in service to that.

Higgins is explicitly Esteban's employee and given how insensitive he can be to Esteban, it seems unlikely that he has any real non-professional loyalty or affection to him. Same with Armando, except things do seem to a bit more cordial between them.

Esteban seems to have a good rapport with Avalor's allies, especially Toshi and Shoji, but these are unlikely to be anything more than friendly diplomatic connections and ones separated by distance.

So yeah, my boy literally does not interact with a single character on the show without at least one of them doing so out of obligation/duty/job requirement and/or ulterior motive. Fifty years later and almost nothing has changed, Esteban still has nothing and no one to call his own.