#like the older I get and the more I consider my childhood and family the more I have to be like ‘oh holy SHIT this was not normal’

[californiaquail]

i don't understand why some people care so much about living as long as possible. "follow this diet designed to help you live past 100" in this economy?

[lesbiansanemi]

I should stop watching stuff on cults

[foldingfittedsheets]

My best friend growing up was a matter of convenience over compatibility. The boy across the street was only a year older than me. We had some common interests but our personality types were a terrible clash. I remember fighting with him just as vividly as any peaceful activity.

We were stuck in the same boat though. There was no other kids to socialize with except our odious older brothers, and being together was slightly less wretched than being alone. Most of the time. Our parents joked that we were like an old married couple, always fighting. We’re both gay now.

His family was better off so he brought more toys and video games to the friendship table. My family had more land so we had animals to play with and secret forest clubhouses. We hung out most days but he refused to acknowledge me at school for the sin of being both a year younger and a girl.

He was a terribly sore loser though. When playing fighting games he’d win four out of five rounds but if I won the fifth he’d turn the console off before letting my character do a victory dance. I was fairly prosaic about this. He liked to play them and I went along. When I won I got to suggest other activities.

Now, I mentioned we both had older brothers. His older brother was only three years above him. They scuffled in a normal sibling manner but the older brother was cognizant that he was bigger and stronger and these fights were more what I would characterize as fencing. There was rules and treaties in place.

My older brother was five years older than me. When we fought it was a no holds barred pit fight. I went absolutely feral. Significantly younger and weaker I unleashed my greatest weapon which was absolute berserker tactics. I bit, scratched, went for the balls, I was a menace. I paid no heed to any injury done to me if it let me land another strike. Most of our fights ended in a stalemate of me pinned or him bleeding too profusely to continue harassing me.

I never considered that I was getting more fighting experience than my friend. When scuffles broke out between us without a controller in hand I won every time. He’d jokingly smack me and we’d go down in a ball of flying hair and monkey screeches, but I always ended on top.

The trouble was, I found, that afterward he was no fun at all. His fragile childhood masculinity couldn’t take these defeats from someone younger and more female than him and he’d always sulk home afterward. I didn’t care for that, especially because fighting him was much more fun than my horrible brother.

Then one day I found the secret. I’d whapped him far too hard upside the head and he began to cry immediately. Full of guilt I whimpered that he’d really hurt my knee. He stopped crying. He hurt my knee? Then we were even! He’d hurt me just as badly and therefore the fight was a draw.

I was delighted by this logic. Every fight thereafter I saw no shame in playing up some injury he’d dealt me retroactively. I had no pride to lose and shamelessly acted beaten to avoid hurting his feelings. Our fights were milder as a result, and we both went away feeling elated by the childhood violence rather than defeated.

[heesdreamer]

FIRST SUMMER

PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader

SUMMARY ➩ you and your bestfriends brother (possibly your mortal enemy) are both given the task of renovating your childhood lake house during the final summer before it’s sold

WARNINGS ➩ light smut, heeseung and reader aren’t super nice to each other most the time

WC ➩ 14.5k

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ Well.. officially out of retirement with this one I hope! I started this august of last year and abandoned it during my hiatus so picking up where I left off was a bit difficult and I apologize for any changes in writing styles. This isn’t my favorite thing I’ve written but I hope you guys enjoy it, thank you always for waiting for me. NOT PROOFREAD NO PART 2

You wondered if Lee Heeseung had been put on this earth for the sole purpose of making your life more difficult.

He’d probably argue this assumption with the fact he had been born before you, his main reasoning behind his many claims that you were the one copying him and making his life a living hell and not the other way around. He was a measly two years older than you but never failed to bring it up and use it against you.

Heeseung had been in your life for as long as you could remember and you absolutely never got along.

It wasn’t a big issue at first considering you were kids and had no real need to be around each other. The playgrounds were big enough for the both of you and your parents saw no reason to force a connection between the two of you, despite the fact you were neighbors and the two pairs of adults actually got along quite well.

Similarly to you and Heeseung’s little sister, a small girl who was born in the same year as you but nearly your polar opposite in personality. At first you’d been hesitant when she started to show up to play with the older boy, knowing him by now as the enemy and assuming she was going to be just as wicked and terrible. It only took watching her push him down onto wood chips once for you to decide to be her best friend.

The boy had scowled from his place on the ground, grumpily picking pieces of the wood from the fabric of his sweater and watching the two of you run off together towards the swings.

He’d failed to understand the power of your friendship in that moment and now 15 years later he was still paying the price, stuck with the two of you constantly. You and Jiwoo almost seemed more like siblings than they did, attached at the hip and never going too long without talking to each other.

Which is why it was all the more annoying that you and Heeseung could never seem to get along, reverting right back to being two kids arguing on the playground every time you saw each other, which was quite often. You’d practically moved into the Lee’s house next door during high school and you were even a frequent guest on their family vacations, their mom booking a place with an extra bed for you before she even asked if you were available.

You weren’t exactly sure why the two of you didn’t get along. He was nice enough to other people and sometimes he cracked jokes that nearly made you laugh, only nearly. For some reason he just brought out a terrible side of you that you didn’t really understand and you were certain you did the same for him.

It was easier now that you were out of school and entering adulthood, not having any major reasons to constantly see each other and his parents didn’t have to force him to drive you and Jiwoo around places now that you had your own cars.

He was definitely still around though and you were trying your best to act civilly despite that inner part of you always preparing for an argument to break out between you.

Especially right now considering the fact he kept kicking your leg underneath the table at the restaurant both your families were eating together at. The Lee’s cousin was in town and you’d always been particularly interested in him, being a total sucker for an accent and a good beach tan.

You sent a glare to your right in Heeseung’s direction when he kicked you for the third time and jammed your heel against the bone in his leg, ignoring the grunt of pain he let out as he bent slightly forward to grab onto his shin. His mom sent him a concerned glance before remembering who he was sitting next to and rolling her eyes as she looked away from the two of you.

You were watching Jake as he talked animatedly about his life guarding job back in his hometown, leaning forward and resting your chin on your palm to show your interest despite the fact you weren’t fully listening.

It was difficult to considering the constant distraction sitting beside you, another kick being sent to the leg of your chair so you jolted slightly to the side. You whipped your head around to look at him again, immediately replacing your interested and awed look with one of hatred and disgust.

“What the hell is your problem?” You were spitting at him in a low whisper, grateful the table was big enough that the others weren’t really paying attention to you. Although they had to have expected an argument eventually considering they sat the two of you together, breaking an unspoken rule that had been built up throughout the years.

“Stop trying to seduce my cousin.�� He was spitting back and his eyebrows were pulled down tight in a sharp glare, keeping eye contact with you in an attempt to intimidate you.

“Mind your own business.” Your response was quick and tight, slightly embarrassed he’d caught you staring but too angry to care.

You turned back to try and focus in on the conversation again but now you were suddenly overly aware of the fact Heeseung was sitting next to you and watching what you were doing, looking for any opportunity to tease you and start up an argument. You sighed softly and leaned back in your chair with crossed arms, keeping a scowl on your face and letting the dinner pass by without speaking again.

“You know, I figured the two of you would eventually start getting along once you became adults.” Your mothers tone was laced with lighthearted disappointment after the dinner, walking ahead of you on the rock path leading up to your front door.

You could hear your father laughing softly in front of her at the idea of your life long feud being laid to rest, a frown instinctively coming up on your face at their inside joke.

Glancing over to the side, looking past the small stretch of grass that separated your pathway from the Lee’s, you saw Heeseung sporting a similar dejected expression and you wondered for a second if he was hearing the same lecture you’d been getting after dinners for as long as you can remember. Then he was looking over towards you and meeting your gaze in the low light of the summer sun setting, eyes immediately hardening into a glare that you quickly returned.

It was hard not to think about it later on in bed, eyes trained on the old plastic stars on your ceiling that didn’t glow anymore. Your hands were folded on your stomach and you were tapping your thumbs softly on the smooth skin in contemplation.

Sometimes, although you’d rather die than admit it to anyone, you also didn’t understand why you and Heeseung didn’t just stop fighting.

He was kind to Jiwoo in a way that always made you envy having siblings and despite his constant teasing he never declined driving her places or picking up food for her when she didn’t feel like going out. And he was even kinder to your parents, treating them like his own and having manners enough for the three of you growing up.

It was like you were dealing with a completely different person, him falling into that same angry glare the moment you’d step into a room. Sometimes he’d be mid story with a group of friends, being charming and funny as he recanted something and exaggerated moments to get a few more chuckles. You’d watch from a far for a bit and then slowly approach and every single time he’d pause for a moment, looking completely thrown off by your arrival, and then tensing up and losing track of what he was saying.

Your presence just seemed to bug him and as the two of you got older it affected you more. You didn’t mind the fact he wouldn’t play with you when you were kids, never dwelled over him saying you had cooties or getting dirt on your favorite stuffed animals.

But the fact he still continued to hate you as you aged and matured, settling into your respective personalities and lives, you couldn’t help but be offended he disliked you so much.

“He’s just weird.” Jiwoo had explained to you once when you were both seventeen, sprawled out on her bed and flipping through a magazine as she addressed you. “You shouldn’t think too deeply about it.”

Heeseung had just graduated high school and you’d all attended the ceremony, both families getting reserved seats per his request.

It had actually gone well for once, he didn’t seem upset that you were there and he had even hugged you alongside your parents when he came off the stage and your mother handed him a bouquet of celebratory flowers. Mrs. Lee had shot you a surprised glance and then a supportive thumbs up and you gave her a soft smile in return, figuring he was just so excited to have graduated that he was managing to tolerate you being there.

The Lee’s had taken advantage of the fact your backyards combined into each other, no fencing between them, and the two pairs of parents had decorated the space for a small party for the older boy.

You were excited to go, especially since Heeseung hadn’t demanded an explanation for your invitation, and you even managed to make some good amount of conversation with a few of his friends.

The conversation was swiftly interrupted when you felt a hand wrapped around the middle of your arm, tugging you a few inches backwards to get your attention. You whipped around to see who it was and you were met with an angry looking Heeseung, looking more familiar to you than the smiley version of him you’d seen earlier.

“Why are you talking to my friends?” His voice was accusatory like you’d done something wrong and he sounded so upset that for a second you felt like you had.

Your mouth had parted in confusion, fumbling for words and coming up short from the shock of his sudden confrontation and also the embarrassment of the situation considering he wasn’t exactly being subtle with his anger and the boy behind you could definitely hear every word he was saying.

“Chill out Hee, we were just making simple conversation.” Jay proved you right by speaking from over your shoulder but you didn’t bother looking at him, keeping your eyes locked on Heeseung and wincing softly at the way his face hardened at his friend defending you. “Cmon man, I know better than to-“

“Do you know better? Because it doesn’t seem like it.” Heeseung was cutting him off at the same time he was removing his gaze from yours, breaking you slightly out of the worried spell you were under as he looked at his friend from over your shoulder.

You weren’t exactly sure what they were talking about but you assumed Heeseung had warned his friends against speaking to you. It took you back a bit, despite knowing he didn’t like you.

The two of you definitely didn’t get along but you were still very close regardless if you liked it or not and you spent a lot of time together, so it hurt you more than you expected it to that he hated you enough to actively try and keep his friends from interacting with you, enough to the point he’d embarrass you and cause a scene at the sight of it.

“Hee I’m sorry.” His eyes snapped back down towards you at the sound of your quiet voice, completely out of character for you to not be fighting back or making a snarky remark.

It seemed to throw him off enough that his anger faltered for a second, looking concerned for a moment as he stared down at you before his jaw was tightening again and his face hardened back up.

You weren’t sure why you didn’t bother to snap back at him, if it was from the embarrassment of being ripped out of a conversation and scolded like a dog who’d gotten into the trash or if it was actual disappointment at his behavior despite the fact you definitely should’ve been used to it.

“I think you should head home. Parties almost over anyways.” He was eventually saying and it was directed towards you although his eyes had dragged back over your shoulder to look at Jay.

You figured he had looked away because he was feeling slightly guilty for embarrassing you and not being fought back in return, or maybe he was disgusted with you and didn’t want to look at you.

Still, his tone wasn’t as angry anymore although just as hard and stern, and you nodded softly before stepping sideways out from between the two tall boys. You knew he was lying about the party being over soon but it had ended for you anyways and you had no issue leaving it and going to the safety of your bedroom.

Jiwoo had caught the end of the encounter and caught up with you as you speedily walked away from the boys who had started to angrily murmur at each other, hence leading to the conversation about her brother in your bedroom and her explaining he was just being weird.

“Jay is a total playboy though, you should steer clear of him.” Her nose was curling up in disgust as she made the casual comment but a small pout formed on your face, wondering if Heeseung thought you were going to hookup with his friend and that’s why he was extra aggressive about it.

Eventually you let it pass from your mind to become just another bullet point in the long list of things Heeseung had done to show you he truly disliked you.

It was a lot easier to start to dislike him back, easier to fight with him and snap insults rather than get confused and sad about why he treated you so differently. So your routine was set in stone even deeper and neither of you ever faltered, not during birthdays or relative weddings or even your own graduation two years later.

So it wasn’t exactly an easy thing to handle when your parents and the Lee’s were sitting you all down to explain that your family lake house was going to be sold at the end of the summer.

“Wait why would you ever sell it?” Jiwoo was blurting out before they got the chance to explain and you had a permanent frown on your face as you waited to hear their response.

You watched your dad and Mr. Lee exchange a heavy but meaningful look, like there was something they’d already discussed amongst themselves in regards of how to tell you. You were sat on the left of Jiwoo, Heeseung on her right and for some reason you had to resist the urge to lean forward and see what his expression was.

“We’ve decided, now that you three are all grown up, it was just time. We figured we’d use the money to travel during the summer or save towards retirement.”

It made sense as your dad started to speak but you felt a weird clenching in your stomach at the thought of not having the lake house to go to anymore.

Realistically he was completely right and you’d started to neglect the yearly trips out there, taking them for granted and not appreciating the time you got to spend at the house. You didn’t even go at all the last two years, finding yourself too caught up with things so unimportant you don’t even remember them now.

The lake house was a tradition that was instilled before any of you were even born, a collaborative effort of your parents to try and bring some fun and adventure to your summers since you grew up so close to the city.

“So it’s just gone?” Heeseung was speaking for the first time since the meeting was called and you were surprised to hear how thick his voice was with upset, clearly more affected by the breaking news than you and his sister. You caved to the urge and leaned forward a bit to try and get a look at him but Jiwoo shot you a sideways glance and you quickly sat back in place.

“Well not exactly.” Mrs. Lee’s voice was soft as always and you watched as she reached across the small space between the seven of you and gently rubbed her sons knee, giving him a soft smile and an encouraging nod. “We will have one last summer with it, mostly for renovations before the new owners come to look at it.”

You knew exactly what she was talking about when she said renovations, hearing your dad complain about the rotting in the deck and the holes in the inside walls for years now but never making the time to fix them.

But you weren’t fully understanding what they had planned for the three of you yet and you wished you had in that moment so maybe you could have come up with an excuse faster. They explained to you softly, attempting to lessen the blow, that you would have to go and stay at the lake house for a few weeks and fix up the place to make it look brand new for the new owners.

You weren’t at all against getting to be up there one last time, breathing in the clear air and having campfires on the sand, but you definitely didn’t want to sign up to spend your summer doing free manual labor.

Your parents left no room for argument and you could see the prepared disappointment on their faces so you offered no reason for it to escape, hesitantly agreeing with the plan and waiting to hear what the siblings next to you had to say about it. Jiwoo was stiff beside you and staring forward at the ground like she was in deep thought, a bad feeling washing over you at her expression.

She proved your suspicions right when she started to explain in a meek voice that she had already made plans for the first month of summer, having completely booked and paid for a vacation near the sea.

Her eyes shifted towards you as she told your parents this and you immediately furrowed your eyebrows in annoyance, knowing right away she was lying and making up an excuse so she didn’t have to come with you until the second half of summer and by then the house would be mostly finished already.

To make matters worse, you didn’t even process the fact Heeseung would definitely not decline considering how much he loved the lake house and that would leave the two of you alone up there.

He seemed to piece it together a few seconds before you did and you saw the realization settle over your parents faces too.

“Woah woah wait, there’s no way I’m going with just her.” He was quick to shut down the idea, sitting up straighter and shaking his head dramatically.

You didn’t say anything in response surprisingly despite the fact everybody in the room tensed up in anticipation for a fight to break out between the two of you. You were a bit dazed from the news of losing a big piece of your childhood and you were also just tired from the day over all, already knowing Heeseung was going to reject before he’d even opened his mouth to do so.

Mr. Lee was sighing and beginning to lecture his son on being an adult and putting your differences aside for something this important but Mrs. Lee was silent and giving you a curious look that you were too afraid to try and decipher.

Eventually it was decided that the two of you would either suck it up and go to the lake house together and work on it without killing each other or you’d face the wrath of four disappointed parents. You didn’t say much about the agreement either although Heeseung had plenty of comments to make and Jiwoo was finding the entire situation pretty hilarious from an outside view.

It had been about an hour since the family meeting and you were still in the Lee’s house, leaning your hip against the counter in the kitchen and mindlessly peeling some potatoes for the stew their mother was making for dinner.

The air was hot and dry like it always was during the beginning of summer, not bothering to creep up anymore and instead it just seemed like one day it was cold and the next you could barely sleep without waking up in a puddle of sweat.

You could hear the bugs outside from the open window, loud and alive with excitement for the new season and the breeze was just barely cooling off your damp skin. Normally this would bring you the same feeling summer always did, a lightness in your chest and a heavy sense of nostalgia everywhere you went.

It wasn’t hard to guess what was dampening your mood and leaving you feeling a bit shut off, the source of the weird emotions just a staircase away upstairs in his room playing video games.

Mrs. Lee was walking into the kitchen and pausing when she saw you although you only met her eyes for a split second before quickly focusing back in on your peeling and chopping. She cleared her throat softly and came over towards where you were leaning on the counter, placing down some lettuce and starting to chop besides you.

“Something put out your fire tonight?” She was asking it casually and her voice was as soft as ever but you immediately understood what she was implying.

You glanced at her from the side of your eye before shaking your head. Mrs. Lee had a certain aura about her that always made you feel like a little kid again, vulnerable and sensitive. As much as you loved your own mother, you always envied your neighbors for having her so close growing up.

“Sometimes it just isn’t worth the argument.” Your words weren’t the least bit convincing considering how forced they sounded coming from your mouth, paired with the fact you’d never once backed down from an argument and they all seemed to be worth it to you up until this point.

You could hear her take a deep self calming breath and your hands froze where they were chopping slowly, bracing yourself for whatever she was planning to say next.

“He means well honey he just… isn’t sure how to get through to you.” She somehow sounded as certain as she did hesitant and you could feel her gentle hand patting the side of your arm softly, leaving you with your poorly sliced vegetables and dimmed fire.

——

Throughout the entire process of packing your bags and mentally preparing yourself to head up to the lake house, you’d completely forgotten the fact you’d have to ride with him the entire five hour car ride there and then back again once it was all over.

He definitely didn’t seem to miss this fact considering he was standing outside leaning against the car with a nasty scowl when you came out, dragging your suitcase behind you and nearly tripping over the step off the porch from its wobbling weight. Your mother was trailing behind to say goodbye but not offering much help when it came to loading up your stuff.

Heeseung luckily didn’t say anything to you when you were approaching, greeting your mom with a gentle but annoyed good morning and staying on the side of the vehicle when you started to attempt to load your stuff inside the trunk.

After a few groans of annoyance slipped out of you, due to the fact your bags kept tipping over back out towards you and refusing to stay still in the neat tower of things Heeseung had packed for himself, he was sighing and making his way back towards you.

You glared at him when he circled around the car, not in the mood to be berated or rushed so early in the morning, especially right before you were stuck in a car together for the entire first half of the day. Your harsh facial expression faltered a bit when he was rolling his eyes and tugging your suitcase out of your grip.

“Just go and get in the car already, you take too long.” He was spitting it at you and harshly side eyeing you before starting to load your stuff up but you didn’t bother to argue considering the gesture was nice enough if you ignored the attitude he always carried.

“Well that was sweet of him.” Your mother was whispering the words to you in a dreamy voice, nudging you softly with her elbow and eyeing Heeseung through the windows.

You paused and glared at her in confusion, a dumbfounded expression and a sneaking suspicion starting to arise considering how weird both her and Mrs. Lee have been acting in regards to the two of you and your complicated, but mostly aggressive, relationship.

“Are you kidding me?” You settled on a bewildered statement instead of grilling her about her weirdness, knowing she wouldn’t give you an answer anyways.

She had given you a shrug that you assumed was noncommittal and then hugged you tight, tighter than she’d ever had and you tensed up a bit at the embrace.

You’d gotten into the passenger seat of the car and tried not to think about how weird the dramatic send off was, tried to focus yourself on keeping calm and not letting Heeseung get to you too early on in your time being forced together. You weren’t exactly sure why you were trying to be the bigger person lately but you chalked it up to being exhausted with the back and forth.

“You’d think she was sending you off to war.” He’d made the comment as he put the car into drive and you glanced over at him, staring at the side of his face, both confused and relieved by the fact he had noticed your moms weird attitude.

“She might as well be.” You didn’t mean to sound so snippy but it was your default setting when replying to him and he didn’t seem to mind the tone, chuckling dryly under his breath and shaking his head in annoyance before focusing in on the road.

He didn’t attempt to talk to you again for another hour or two and you were grateful for the silence, giving you another opportunity at being less confrontational. It definitely wasn’t for his benefit or to be kinder to him, you just didn’t want to constantly be exhausting your energy with the effort it took to keep up with whatever set him off.

Eventually he was pulling off of the main highway and turning into a gas station that was almost completely barren, stuck in one of those sections of a road trip that was basically just fields followed by more fields.

He was getting out of the car and shifting through his pockets for his wallet before sighing and glancing at you in the passenger seat, watching him from the corner of your eye so it didn’t seem like you were staring.

“Want anything to eat or drink?” He was asking in that familiar reluctant tone he always had with you and for a second you wanted to snap at him and decline his offer, tell him to just hurry up and get what he needed so you could get back on the road.

You took a small breath instead to steady your emotions before nodding. “Yeah I’ll just… I’ll take a-“

“I know what you want.” He was cutting you off and closing the car door before you could say anything else, leaving you with parted lips and annoyance starting to simmer in the lowest part of your stomach.

You scoffed even though he wasn’t around to hear it and leaned back in your seat, crossing your arms and scowling as you waited for him to return. You highly doubted he knew what you would get from a gas station, knowing he never paid attention to you or your interest outside of finding something to fight about and it just aggravated you further that he would go as far as to ask like he cared just to not let you answer.

He didn’t take long in the gas station luckily or else you’d overthink too much and be on the verge of exploding, sniffing slightly when he slid back into his seat and passed the bag with the snacks in it.

You paused for a second to glare at him before you were taking a look into the plastic and pausing when you spotted your favorite drink and a snack you commonly ate whenever you were stressed out or particularly craving something, mixed in with things you knew he enjoyed.

“What?” He was asking from the drivers seat and he sounded weirdly awkward underneath the familiar attitude. “Is it not right or something?”

“No it’s… it’s right.” You cleared your throat and nodded softly, sitting back in your seat and closing the snack bag after you grabbed what you wanted out of it and balanced it on your lap. “Thanks.”

“Yeah whatever.” It was muttered in his low tone but you caught it anyways, finding it almost as weird as the fact you had thanked him. He was finally starting the car and starting to pull out of the gas station much to your relief and you focused back on looking out the passenger window.

The heat was reaching the point where the low quality AC in the car wasn’t doing much to cool either of you down and once he rolled his window down instead, you took the silent cue to do the same to yours.

It was still pretty dry in the air and the sweat was really starting to make you itch and worsen your mood so you were hesitantly unbuckling your seatbelt so you could sit up more in your spot and pull your sweater over your head, leaving you in just a tank top and you sighed softly in relief as the air immediately cooled down the wetness of your sweaty arms.

You could feel Heeseung’s stare from your left and you glanced at him with furrowed eyebrows, rolling your eyes when he quickly scowled in return before snapping his gaze back onto the road.

It was pretty quiet for the rest of the drive, Heeseung playing the same music you often heard coming from his bedroom or his headphones when you were forced to sit close to each other in a car so you were actually able to recognize them and sing along.

Neither of you said much even when getting out of the car and starting to bring your things in, exchanging quick glares when you reached for the same bag or got in each others way but for the most part you were too relieved to finally be back somewhere that always caused your stress to melt away.

This time wasn’t any different and you took a second before you went inside with your things to take a deep breath, letting the fresh air fill your lungs and listening to the sounds of the water against the shore just off in the distance.

You couldn’t see the lake from the driveway as clearly as you could from the other side of the house where the deck was located but it was just one of those places where you could actually feel the difference in the air and the atmosphere.

“Can you hurry up? There’s plenty of time to stop and do nothing later.” Heeseung was griping at you as he passed by with another load of bags and you scowled at his back, completely removed from the peaceful moment you’d been having.

You decided to just leave it be and finish unpacking, flopping onto your back on your designated bed and panting slightly from the effort mixed with the heat once you were completely finished. Your phone had been abandoned against the span of your stomach but when it started to vibrate, you immediately knew who it was.

“So how’s it going? Have you killed my brother yet?” Jiwoo’s amused voice did nothing but amuse you further although you were struck by how much you missed her teasing.

You could hear the sounds of waves in the distance through her side of the phone, envy settling deep into your gut despite the fact you were also near water. The small lake was a lot different compared to the endless sea she was currently vacationing at, having a nice time with people who cared about her versus you being stuck with her older brother who couldn’t bother even being kind to you.

“We surprisingly haven’t really fought yet.” It came out of your mouth in a hefty sigh and you absentmindedly played with the string of your pajama shorts, pressing the phone tighter against your ear. “Think he’s downstairs getting ready for dinner.”

“Are you going to eat with him then or just hide out in our childhood bedroom?” She was asking it like it was a question but you both knew the answer already, the same accusatory tone that she always had heavy in her voice underneath the knowing smile you could practically see in front of you. “He’d probably secretly like it if you ate with him you know, I always did figure he had a crush on you.”

An automatic eye roll came over you at the sound of her baseless teasing. She often made jokes about Heeseung secretly liking you growing up, coming to the conclusion that was the reason he was always so harsh towards you.

You’d told her countless times that that was absolutely ridiculous and there was no way Heeseung liked you, let alone that he was the type of person who thought being mean to somebody was going to get them to like him back. You had seen the types of girls Heeseung brought home occasionally and he definitely knew better than to resort to elementary school level flirting methods.

She was eventually hanging up once one of her friends started to call her name, inviting her to come and swim with them.

You laid in bed for a while after the call went silent, feeling struck again with that weird lonely and nostalgic emotion that you couldn’t quite understand. It wasn’t normally this silent in the lake house, typically filled with doors opening and closing and the sounds of your mothers rushing around the kitchen as they cooked and your fathers cleaned.

As much as you didn’t want to, you couldn’t help but wonder if Heeseung was feeling just as weird about the whole situation as you, if he was downstairs just as lonely and unnerved by the fact it was only the two of you this summer and then nobody ever again. Your mind stuck on that thought process when you started to smell food drifting its way up the stairs and going straight to your empty stomach.

You’d planned to avoid the older boy as much as you could, especially during the first few days, but you were beyond hungry by now and you couldn’t help yourself from standing out of the bed and making your way downstairs.

He didn’t notice you for a few seconds when you first hit the bottom step, watching him for a beat as he casually moved around the kitchen and diverted his attention to three different pots and pans. He was listening to music again, something low playing from the old radio that sat in the lake house year round, and you realized how often you associated him with something soft playing.

You were completely ripped from your thought process when he was turning around and letting out a loud shriek when he saw you standing at the bottom of the stairs, dropping the bowl that was in his hands and doing a little scared hop.

“What the fuck are you doing?” He was spitting out and your mouth parted in surprise, not expecting such an extreme reaction or how loud it suddenly got. “Why are you just standing there like a weirdo?”

“What? I was not, I was just..” You started to defend yourself loudly but gave up midway and let out an annoyed grunt, knowing he wasn’t exactly wrong about what you were doing and you didn’t necessarily have an explanation. “I was just coming to see what you were cooking dickhead.”

He stared at you for a few seconds with a look on his face that you didn’t really understand before he was stepping to the side and revealing the plate with a handful of burgers on it.

You looked at it before you were meeting his stare and a weird feeling passed through you while holding his gaze, not something you often did- especially not willingly. He had cooked enough for the both of you despite his attitude when you’d came down and you weren’t sure if it was intentional or just habit but the act struck you.

The two of you ended up sitting at the table and eating in awkward silence, directly across from him but feeling like he was miles away considering he hadn’t even acknowledged you being in the room once.

You couldn’t help but be hyper aware of the fact you were very rarely alone with Heeseung and this was about as alone as any two people could possibly be. He was a lot less defensive when it was just the two of you and if you didn’t know any better you’d say he almost seemed shy, making you think about the jokes Jiwoo often made.

It’s not like Heeseung was at all ugly, you’d never stoop low enough to make fun of him for something that was so clearly not true.

Especially within the last year or two, he’d completely changed both in build and confidence and you were extremely glad you didn’t have to be around him as much as you did growing up. You disliked him as a human being but you were still a person in reality and he was almost unnaturally attractive.

“Why are you staring at me again?” His voice was low across the table, speaking in an awkward mumble as he started to push what was left of his food around with his fork.

You didn’t bother denying the fact you were watching him even though you hadn’t really realized you were doing it, completely zoned out again. You figured your time in the house together was already going to be awkward no matter what so you might as well ask him what you were thinking about. “Jiwoo says you have a crush on me.”

He completely tensed up for just a split second before he was quickly switching his demeanor and letting out a heavy scoff like he found you ridiculous. You caught the small reaction and your interest peaked, sensing an opportunity to get under his skin.

“Jiwoo also watches too many romance movies.” He was quickly disregarding what you had said with a casual and bored tone but you could tell that he was clenching his fork a little tighter, avoiding looking up from his plate all together.

“So you’ve never once found me attractive?” It rolled off your tongue easily, like you were asking him something as simple as to pass the mashed potatoes, but you gave him a knowing glance from under your eyelashes.

He finally looked up at you once you said this and he seemed taken back by the way you were watching him, the expression on his face telling you he thought you were absolutely crazy for even asking this.

“What? Are you kidding me, of course I haven’t.” He was quick to deny it and you could tell he was getting irritated, hand tightening around his silverware and that familiar clench of his jaw showcasing how much your questions were bothering him. You couldn’t tell if it was because he felt embarrassed or disgusted.

You let out a soft hum of understanding and let the silence sit for a few breaths, watching as he slightly relaxed under the assumption you were done saying weird things.

“I think you’re attractive.” He had been mid bite when you finally spoke again and his body lurched forward almost like he was choking, covering his mouth when he coughed and quickly taking a sip of water to try and force down whatever he had put into his mouth before you nearly killed him.

After he calmed down he was shaking his head at you again although not looking at you, staring down at his plate like he was thinking deeply about something and for a minute you wondered if he was going to take the bait like always or if he was going to just brush you off, making your stay much more awkward.

“My sister put you up to this?” His voice was stone cold now and he clearly was slowly losing his resolve, similarly to you considering what he said had completely thrown you off.

What did Jiwoo have to do with any of this and why would he automatically think that?

“No.” You shrugged like it was a casual conversation but your heart was beating a bit faster now, sensing genuine anger from him and not just annoyance. “I just don’t see the point in lying just because we don’t like each other.”

“You think I’m attractive?” His eyebrow was quirking up now and he was narrowing his eyes, leaning forward in his seat.

He’d finally put down his fork and stopped pretending to be focusing on the food he had barely eaten, elbows on the table and his full attention on you as he waited for you to reaffirm what you had said so confidently a few seconds ago.

The confidence had definitely left your body as soon as you’d said it and actually got his attention, feeling similarly to how you did when he embarrassed you at his party despite the fact the two of you were alone.

Very alone.

Still, you held strong and pushed through the conversation and if your stomach turned at his head tilt when you gave him a small quick nod, you’d pretend it didn’t. There was no going back now and you weren’t sure what direction this scenario was heading towards.

On one hand, you knew Heeseung had to be lying. You definitely weren’t unattractive and he clearly had eyes, ones that settled on you more times than you’d wished you had noticed so he wasn’t oblivious to this fact either regardless if he wanted to pretend he was. He was a teenage boy at one point and you were prancing around his house in short skirts and bathing suits.

And on the other hand, you didn’t think it necessarily mattered.

If Heeseung found you attractive he didn’t have to say it and this would be the ultimate time to completely embarrass you, humiliate even. If he rejected you here, you’d never live it down and he’d forever hold this over you as the time he utterly destroyed your ego in one fell swoop. Plus a large part of you was hoping he wasn’t planning to do that anyways even though you weren’t exactly sure what you wanted out of this.

You had hated the boy across from you for as long as you’ve known the power of the emotion and you’d never let him and his tall build and cute hair distract you from this fact.

But you also weren’t stuck seeing him everyday now. He didn’t live at home and you rarely came around unless you were forced beyond what you could deny so the stakes were a lot less high if he reciprocated what you were saying right now.

“You’re going to have to say it.” His low commanding tone was enough to stop you from overthinking the fact this was a bad idea, an absolutely terrible idea.

It was also enough for you to shift in your chair uncomfortably so you could better squeeze your legs together, watching the way Heeseung’s eyes darkened at the movement even though there was no way he could see what you were doing underneath the table.

“I think you’re attractive Hee, don’t be weird about it.” You were pulling yourself together and standing from your seat then, completely popping the bubble of tension that had started to suffocate you.

He didn’t say anything, thankfully not correcting you on the fact you had definitely been the one who made things weird, but he watched you with a heavy expression as you hurriedly cleaned your plate and disappeared up the stairs with quick footsteps.

——

You were coming to terms with an unmeasurable amount of regret now that a few hours had passed.

The bed had become your official moping place and you stuffed your face so far into the pillow you could barely catch your breath, possibly a self punishment for your humiliating behavior. You’d given up on attempting to sleep and you couldn’t rely on Jiwoo to entertain you considering she was probably busy and you were fearful you’d slip up and confess your sins to her the second she answered.

How do you explain that you’d nearly, just barely, flirted with her brother?

If you could even call it that considering the fact he looked like he was just on the verge of throwing his plate at you the entire time. Still, it had been weird and far too bold on your part and you were strongly regretting your life decisions up until this point.

Eventually you decided that sleep was useless and not coming anytime soon and you might as well make use of the fact you were at the lake house, suddenly remembering the hot tub that was placed around the side of the large deck. It didn’t take long for you to change into your swimsuit and start to head outside but you froze up right outside the slider door.

Considering how cruel the universe had been up to this point, you should’ve expected the fact that Heeseung was already occupying the small pool of water.

You were just starting to take a step backwards with the plan to retreat back upstairs and change again into your pajamas when you decided against it, taking a deep heavy breath before pulling the door open and simultaneously alerting the boy of your presence.

He was nearly all the way in the bubbling water but you could tell he was shirtless, something you’d normally be unaffected by if it wasn’t for the conversation you had. The steam from the hot water mixing with the cold night air was covering his face for the most part but you could see him enough to tell his face had hardened at the sight of you.

His gaze was locked on you for the duration of your walk towards the tub, stopping right outside of it and taking another subtle breath to try to calm yourself down.

“Mind if I join you?” Your voice was rougher than you wanted to be, nearly giving up the fact you were affected by the awkward tensioned air and the way he was watching you still.

He made it worse by not responding out loud, giving you a subtle nod of his head that made your heart rate increase. Still you were following through with the initial goal and climbing over the side of the tub before settling down into the hot water, letting out a sigh of relief and sinking into it until only the tip of your shoulders were above the surface.

Heeseung was still watching you and you were avoiding looking at his side completely, although that didn’t help much considering you could feel his stare on you.

“I’m sorry for making shit weird.”

Well apparently your mouth was planning on getting things out of the way before your brain was.

You looked up just in time to see him cock a brow in your direction, an expression on his face you couldn’t read and you almost groaned in annoyance from how calm he was being about the entire thing. You kept waiting for him to lash out at you and yell about your weirdness, maybe even call your parents and demand Jiwoo came instead of you.

“I don’t think it’s weird.” Instead he was saying this and shifting so his arms were resting on the back of the tub, lifting his torso out of the water more and giving you a better view of the wet streaks going down his neck and past his adams apple. “Unless you didn’t mean it.”

“I meant it.” Your voice was coming out rushed and your eyes were widening a bit, mentally cursing yourself for being so eager to reassure him.

He hummed softly like he had earlier and your stomach flipped again with nerves.

It wasn’t missing you that this was completely out of character for you and totally ironic but you were only human and as much as you disliked him as a person, you couldn’t deny how good he looked with damp hair and his tan skin lit up by the LED’s of the hot tub. He was sexy and always had been despite how much you wished that wasn’t true, and now you were alone.

So you tried to ignore your long history with him as you shifted through the water so you were closer to his side, only a quarter of the way to him now instead of being directly across from you.

He watched you silently for a few beats before he was scoffing and shaking his head like he was judging you, causing your eyebrows to furrow tightly as you stopped moving closer to him.

“What?” You felt embarrassed suddenly at your assumption and prepared yourself for him to make fun of you again, scold you for ever thinking he’d want you closer to him just because he hadn’t made you feel weird about your admission.

“Nothing. I just should have known you liked me.” He was laughing to himself slightly like it was the funniest thing in the world, not at all discouraged by the glare you were sending him. “You totally followed me around all the time, plus you always had that look in your eyes.”

“I do not have a look.” You hissed at him with a sharp voice and this seemed to amuse him even further. “And I never said I liked you don’t be stupid, I just think you’re hot.”

His eyebrows raised up high and his eyes widened in amusement, catching your slip of the tongue as you aggressively spat the words at him. “Oh see you said attractive, didn’t know you found me hot too.”

He was clearly having fun with the whole embarrassing situation and you gave up quickly, leaning against the back of the tub behind you and frowning with your arms crossed under the water in front of you. You stared ahead of you at the bubbles and tried to tune out his low chuckles.

“Don’t get pissy about it.” His voice was filtering over the running jets again and you glanced at him from the side of your eye, surprised to see something that slightly resembled guilt on his face. “If it makes you feel any better… I think you’re hot too.”

This made the corner of your lips turn up into a small smile,something very rarely ever sent in his direction from you. You turned your body to face him again and leaned forward with interest.

“So you lied earlier.” Your voice was more excited than you wished it was but you didn’t fully care, sitting up on your knees a bit. His gaze was dropping down to your chest before meeting your eyes again, losing all traces of humor now that more of your skin was visible.

“Yeah. I lied.” He confirmed in a lower tone and your smile fell slightly, suddenly nervous again. You were used to how he was acting a few seconds ago, making fun of you and feeling angry and embarrassed around him but this was a side of him you had no history with outside of watching him flirt with girls at parties Jiwoo forced him to bring you both along to.

That didn’t stop your body from naturally moving closer to him, drifting along the bench until you were right beside him and you could feel his thigh pressed up against your knee.

Your mouth was parted softly to try to keep breathing around the hot steam and his eyes were seemingly transfixed on it, watching your lips as you wet them instinctively and remaining on them even when your tongue was slipping back into your mouth. You could feel his breath on your face and it struck you that you’d never been this close to him before.

His face was leveled with yours for once since you were still perched up on your knees and he was sitting normally, minimizing the usually very apparent height difference.

He hadn’t touched you or even moved at all but you could feel his skin next to yours and you were hyper aware of his every movement, the subtle rise and fall of his built chest and the way his throat moved with every deep inhale he took. He seemed to be showing some restraint and that made you shift impatiently, teetering towards him until your shoulder was brushing against his.

His eyes shut tightly for a second when he felt your bare skin touching his, mumbling something under his breath before he was looking at you again.

This time his gaze was going all around your face instead of just focusing on your lips, even dropping back down to your bare shoulders and the way your wet hair was sticking to the skin of your neck. He scanned down past your chest to where the rest of your span of skin disappeared under the water.

“Hee.” Your voice was breathy as you finally spoke and instead of cutting the tense moment, it only worsened it and you felt your thighs pressing together again like they had at the dinner table. This time he could clearly see the movement past the bubbles and he stiffened a bit. “Can you touch me Hee?”

You watched him tense even more at the sound of your whiny voice using his nickname, one you didn’t say nearly as much as your friends and family.

He didn’t reject you even though you were starting to think he might considering how restricted he look, instead he was lifting his hand out from under the water and cupping it around your jaw softly. You could feel his thumb rubbing along your cheek, the water from his arm rolling down your neck and disappearing back into the pool of it.

It was almost embarrassing how much it affected you to be touched by him so intimately and the urge to kiss him was too overwhelming, a dizziness settling in from both the heat and the longing sitting harshly in your stomach.

You were so close to each other that you could feel his lips brushing against yours, not quite kissing considering he was rocking softly backwards every few breaths and holding your face tightly so you couldn’t surge forward and get it over with.

Heeseung definitely wasn’t letting go of his habit of teasing you but this felt particularly cruel and prolonged.

“That what you want? Want me to touch you?” His tone was meaner than you expected it to be but you didn’t exactly mind, at all apparently considering the shiver it sent down your back. He was clearly making fun of you and your desperation but if he touched you, you knew you wouldn’t be able to find it in yourself to care.

So you took a deep shaky breath and nodded your head as much as you could while he still held your face, moving your hand so it was touching his bare knee.

Your action took him off guard enough that he lessened his grip for a split second but it was long enough for you to lean forward and press your lips against his for just a second, barely feeling them on yours before he was pushing you back again and your hand was impatiently squeezing his knee.

Another embarrassing whine came from deep in your throat and his eyes flashed with something for a second before he let out another soft hum.

“Can’t do that baby.” He was so close that his lips pressed against yours as he spoke and you completely froze up once his words made sense to your lust dazed brain, just barely processing his rejection before he was letting go of your face and leaning away from you.

You did nothing but watch him in horrified shock as he stood out of the water and left the hot tub, weirdly calm even when your gaze was locking on his bare torso.

He was leaving casually like he hadn’t just did the worst thing you could possibly imagine and you felt hot wet tears of anger spreading rising quickly, completely humiliated and swiftly reminded on why you hated Lee Heeseung so much.

——

As the days continued passing with awkward avoidance on both of your ends, you were struck with the fact that maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you always thought you did.

You’d actually admired Heeseung at points considering he was the oldest out of the three of you and continuously setting a good example despite all the pressure. Some nights you’d leave a heated argument with him and head back inside your own home, laying on your bed with a racing heart and a scowl fixed in your features.

Then you’d hear the strumming of his guitar coming from his house, window wide open and directly across from yours.

The first few times you’d put in your headphones or let out an annoyed shriek as you slammed yours shut, trying your best to tune him out and erase his existence from your mind ; out of sight out of mind.

Eventually you got tired of pretending you weren’t impressed by how smoothly the chords carried over to you, how swiftly he must be moving his hands to produce something so soft and gentle. You’d let it carry you to sleep and for a moment you felt like you were experiencing something together.

You were more naive then, tricked into thinking he ever cared about you enough to even know you were listening, childish and stupid to possibly hope he might’ve been playing for you.

Some sort of apology.

He never was and he made that very clear to you and eventually your embarrassment and shame turned to hide behind anger. It was easier to fight with him, to scream and yell, than to admit that he was hurting your feelings and lowering your ego everytime he treated you so harshly.

The entire situation was extremely frustrating and annoying, almost (but not quite) as annoying as the continuous banging happening directly under your head for the past hours.

With a loud groan, you were getting out of bed and deciding to end your moping abruptly, heading downstairs to see what the workers Heeseung had hired were doing that made that much noise. You slowed your steps as you descended down the stairs, realizing there was a lot more men in your second home than you’d originally expected and they were all moving around at a fast and busy pace.

You’d just barely managed to dodge one of them, carrying a large amount of… something, as you reached the bottom step but in your attempt to move out of the way you were running into an abandoned tool box and spiraling in the other direction.

Your eyes had squeezed shut and your body tensed bracing for an impact that never came, instead feeling yourself smack into someone’s strong and sturdy frame.

“You alright?” You quickly shot open your eyelids to see who it was you’d fallen into, turning red in the face at the concerned look the man holding you was sending down in your direction, still holding you softly and giving your arms a slight squeeze like he was trying to get you to focus.

He watched as you nodded your head softly with wide eyes, helping you steady yourself back on your feet but still holding onto your upper arms like he was worried you’d fall again.

You took the opportunity to scan over his body and your face flushed a bit more at the sheer size of the man and his extremely toned arms, looking away quickly to focus on his feet between yours instead. Heeseung was definitely a large guy too and nearly towered over you but you imagined he’d look tiny in comparison to the one in front of you.

“You sure you’re okay? You look a little red.” He was speaking again in a soft voice that directly opposed his look and you snapped out of your random thoughts about Heeseung.

“I’m okay I promise.” You were nodding quickly and giving him a soft smile, hoping you were convincing enough to make him believe you definitely didn’t need any type of medical attention just because you’d tripped over a box. “Just startled me a little. Thanks for catching me….”

You trailed off while watching him and it took him a few seconds to understand what you were looking for, a bright smile on his face once he realized and filled in the gaps. “Namjoon.”

“Well thank you Namjoon.” His name was rolling off your tongue smoothly and his smile suddenly looked a lot more like a smirk making you a lot more aware of the fact he was still holding onto your arms and standing close to you.

He didn’t get a chance to reply considering the loud sound of someone aggressively clearing their throat was coming from next to the two of you, both your heads turning to see who it was and it was almost comical the way you froze up in sync with each other.

“Shouldn’t you be getting back to work now Kim?” Heeseung’s tone was stiff but you could feel the underlying threat in his words and the man across from you definitely could considering he was immediately letting go of you and taking a few rushed steps backwards, mumbling a goodbye to you before he was disappearing into the kitchen to find a task to complete.

Your shoulders slumped at the interruption but your heart was beating fast looking at Heeseung next to you, recognizing the expression on his face even though it was subtle.

He was absolutely furious, the type of anger that typically caused you to end arguments early or completely stay out of his way. When he got like this you knew it wasn’t the time to poke fun at him or start up any banter, his entire aura becoming a lot darker and less forgiving.

You’d fought with him like this a few times, realizing a little too late that he was in one of his moods and it was those times that he had said the worst things. Things that made the family and friends around you gasp even though they were used to your rivalry, things that caused tears to spring to your eyes as you stormed off to a different room.

“Let’s go.” He was saying it calmly but you felt a chill run over you as he stared at you with fury and disgust, reluctantly following behind him as he left the main living space and entered a small hallway just next to it.

You hadn’t even gotten the chance to explain before he was abruptly turning around and facing you, taking a few harsh steps in your direction until you were backing up and slamming into the wall behind you. Your eyes widened in surprise and slight fear, not understanding why he was suddenly cornering you.

Heeseung moved forward until he was pressing against your body and now your emotions were abruptly changing as you realized what was happening, a wave of heat rushing through you at the feeling of his front leaning onto you.

You were slightly embarrassed he most likely could feel how fast your heart was beating but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care once he was reaching up to grip your face, a lot less gentle than he had earlier in the week when you thought he was going to kiss you.

“So I don’t give you the attention you were begging for and now you’re flirting with the first guy you find?” His voice was low and harsh, completely demeaning you and still watching you with hatred in his eyes.

You hated how much this drove you crazy, the urge for him to berate you and make you apologize for what you had accidentally done arising quicker than you’d even knew had existed and you were a bit dizzy from how much you wanted this.

“Please.” It was rolling off your tongue before you’d realized you were saying it and you barely recognized your own voice, breathy and begging for something you didn’t even understand. His eyes got even darker, if it was even possible, and your stomach lit up with a desperate heat.

“Pisses me off so bad when you do that.” He was practically hissing it at you, voice a low whisper and his hand around your jaw tightened, leaning in so he was speaking to your ear. “Stop being so fucking dumb and use your words.”

You tried to get ahold of yourself enough to find the right sentence to tell him what you want but your mind was completely blank, instead deciding to just arch your back off the wall so you were pressing tighter against him.

Heeseung faltered a bit and his eyes dropped down towards where your stomachs met, watching as you tried your best to roll your hips up to meet his but failed to actually get any sort of relief for yourself.

“Just fucking touch me.” You were finally gasping the words out through clenched teeth and he didn’t waste any time thankfully, surging forward and surprising you by kissing you deeply.

His tongue was pushing into your mouth before you even processed the fact he was actually kissing you and you were letting out a satisfied groan against his lips, letting him lick into your mouth softly and play with his tongue against yours. His hand was wrapping around your lower back and tugging you forward so you were pressing against him the way you wanted to.

A wave of desire ripped through you feeling that he was hard against you and you snuck your hand in between the tight space of your bodies and palmed him through his shorts, smiling at the way he sucked in a sharp breath and stopped kissing you for a second.

Your smile was dropping when he was meeting your eyes and looking ten times more deadly than he did in a daily basis, still glaring at you like he always did but with tenfold the usual fire and tension. That didn’t stop him from pushing his hips against your seeking hand for a few seconds, eventually stopping and letting out a groan as he snatched your wrist off of him and pinned it against the wall behind you instead.

He was rutting into you so hard that you were almost worried the rough materiel of the wall behind you was going cut your back, completely forgetting about it half a second later when he was pressing himself perfectly against your sensitive lower half.

“Keep your fucking mouth shut.” His voice was dangerously low in your ear and you could feel him taking heavy breaths against your neck, panting to try and keep himself quiet.

You were nodding quickly at his command despite the fact he couldn’t see you, curling your hand tightly in his hair and spreading your legs wider so he could continue to slot himself between them and give you just a taste of relief. He immediately took the silent invitation and shifted his hips against yours more, almost bordering painful if it wasn’t so addicting to feel him this way.

Heeseung was clearly struggling to control himself and you couldn’t recall ever feeling this needy for anybody before, something about how forbidden the entire situation was mixed with the life of tension and anger was driving you absolutely insane and you didn’t seem to be alone in it.

“You want me to fuck you here?” He was picking his face up out of your neck to look down at you and check your reaction, his eyes hazy and dark with his lips parted and swollen like he’d been chewing on them. “Where anyone can hear you begging for me?”

“Who said I’m going to beg?” You were trying to snap back at him but your voice came out weak, nearly a desperate whine that got louder when he was shifting against you again.

“Sure seems like it, the way you’re spreading your legs for me already.” His big hand was sliding down past your waist and cupping underneath your bare knee, hiking your leg up harder and rolling his hips against you so deliciously you nearly collapsed as a stuttered moan ripped through you.

You immediately took your hand out of his hair and covered your mouth with it, eyes rolling back a bit at the feeling of him shifting his hips against you and practically dry humping you right there against the wall.

Knowing that the house workers were only a few feet away and walking around completely clueless about what they might walk into was only making you more desperate for him and you didn’t care how out of character it was for you. At this point you would be willingly to let him take you in front of anybody who wanted to watch, leave you shaking and crying for him in public.

He didn’t need to hear you say it to know this, a cocky look on his face underneath the fucked out expression he already had.

“Always running this pretty mouth.” He was speaking again in that same low tone but he seemed completely out of it, almost like he was talking to himself and not you. His free hand was gripping your face, squishing your cheeks together so your lips were puffed out and your eyes were wide. “Should’ve known you wanted me to stuff it.”

An embarrassing wave of want washed over you again at his words, nearly drooling at the thought of him shoving his cock in your mouth to get you to stop back talking. It would’ve felt more humiliating if it wasn’t for the way his eyes were completely frozen on your mouth like he was thinking the exact same thing.

You couldn’t resist the urge to tease him more and your tongue was sticking out softly before you’d even realized you were doing it, causing him to loosen his rough grip on your face a bit to allow for it to push past your lips. You were staring up at him with big wet eyes and your tongue on display, silent waiting and begging for something you hoped he’d understand.

Thankfully he did and he was only hesitating for half a second before he was picking his head up more and spitting down into your mouth.

Heeseung didn’t even give you a chance to swallow before he was following the spit with his tongue, licking along yours and cleaning up his own mess before you were pulling him back into a kiss and sucking him deeper and deeper into your mouth. It was completely filthy, the nastiest kiss you’d ever shared with somebody and you were terrified you’d become addicted to the feeling of his spit on your chin.

“Please Hee.” You were gasping out into his mouth, reaching up to tug on his hair again and get his attention locked on you and your request. “Need you to fuck me.”

For the first time since you’d started, he actually looked hesitant. He glanced down the hallway towards where the dozen of workers were and your heart dropped to your stomach thinking he was going to stop what you were doing, even if it was just to take you upstairs to a bedroom. You couldn’t handle the idea of separating for even a second and you were spreading your legs impossibly wider and touching his face with your shaky hand.

He glanced back at you in question and his eyes darkened again seeing the pure disgusting need on your face.

“You’re stupid if you think I’d fuck you like this.” He was shaking his head in anger and taking a step away from you, one that immediately had your body tensing and your heart aching in upset.

You were instinctively reaching out to try and grab onto him, just about ready to get down on your knees and beg him not to leave you at the peak of your high like that. But the empty look in his eyes made you rethink that decision and you just stood there in shock as he gave you one more angry glare before he was exiting the hallway and leaving you alone inside of it.

It was even more pathetic considering the way your entire body slumped against the wall before sliding down it and ending up on the floor with humiliation completely smothering you, knowing you only had a few breaths to wallow in your embarrassment before needing to get up and go back to your room.

—

You’d completely retracted back to your bed again after that and this time not even the smell of food or the sound of annoying construction could get you to go back downstairs and risk running into him.

Jiwoo had called you three times every hour before she finally gave up and instead sent a thread of text messages that you promptly ignored. You were overly paranoid that she’d find out what had happened, like even the sound of your voice would give away the fact you’d made out with her brother since she last heard from you.

If you hadn’t hated him fully before than you definitely did now because there was no way you’d still want Lee Heeseung after he embarrassed you like this.

You didn’t think he would tell anybody considering he’d get just as much heat for it as you would, if not worse since he was older and supposed to be taking care of you and his sister at all times in your parents minds. But the interaction staying a secret was almost worse in your mind, a private thing between you and him.

Nothing could have convinced you to leave the comfort of your familiar bed until the wind of the sea lightly blew back the curtains and gave you a small glimpse of the sunset raging outside.

You let out a big breathy sigh, realizing now how much time you’d been wasting moping around about a stupid boy when this was your last summer ever getting to experience sunsets this bright and air this fresh. Heeseung definitely wasn’t sat in his room caring about you and how he hurt you so why should you be?

It was almost completely dark by the time you made it down to the beach but you didn’t regret coming, the lake looking long and endless now that you couldn’t see the other side.

You remember it seeming a lot scarier when you were a kid, before you’d ever seen the real sea and back when you and Jiwoo used to dare each other to swim out as far as you could before seaweed grabbed at your ankles and spooked you back to shore.

Your heart ached with how much you missed her and you were pulling your phone out of your pocket and putting it to your ear without another breath, playing in the sand with your free hand while you anxiously waited for her to pick up and talk to you. You didn’t have to wait long considering she was answering after the second ring and you let out a breath of relief.

“Finally, I was starting to think you’d really killed eachother.” Her voice was sweet as ever and a wave of fondness and nostalgia hit you even harder, laughing softly but not fully answering her yet.

For some reason the sound of her light joking mixed with the waves from her side of the phone was bringing tears to your eyes and you didn’t need to say anything for her to understand you were feeling something heavy. You both stayed silent and you hoped she figured you were just upset about leaving the lake house behind and didn’t create her usual conspiracy theories.

“You okay over there? I can come early if you need me to.” Your friend was doing her best to reassure you without knowing why you were upset and you wiped your now running tears with your sleeve.

“I’m alright, just feeling a lot of things right now I think. Are you having fun?” You weren’t exactly lying in your answer which was good considering you didn’t want to lie to her anymore than you already had to.

“I’d be having more if you were with me but you already know that. Can’t believe my brother gets to spend more time with you than I do.”

Your heart sunk a little at the mention of the exact reason you were crying and you were sure how to respond to her without giving too much away. She could read you even over the phone so you knew she might’ve felt the energy shift now that she’d brought her brother up, sniffling a bit and letting the sand run through your fingers.

She talked a bit more about her vacation and how much fun being at the sea was after so long and you listened to her excitedly chatter, letting out soft hums every once in awhile to assure her you were still listening.

You actually were but a large part of you was still thinking about Heeseung and what he might be doing back up the hill inside the lake house. You wondered if he felt guilty for you hiding in your room or if he had even realized you weren’t inside anymore.

Jiwoo was eventually bidding you a goodnight and making you promise to answer her the next time she called on the first ring, sounding a bit heavier when she was saying goodbye and hanging up the phone. You hated that you didn’t feel the typical happy buzz that your bestfriend typically brought and more tears made their way down your cheeks.

You sat like that on the shore for another hour, watching the waves roll and crash onto the sand just a few feet away from where you were sitting.

It was putting you in a sort of trance, so many thoughts running through your head that you weren’t even able to pinpoint where one started and another ended.

You were so deep in your own head that you didn’t at all hear the calls of your name from up the hill, starting off mildly confused and concerned but escalating to full on desperate and panicky shout when they were met with no response. You certainly didn’t hear the footsteps coming down the large wooden steps from the back deck or when he breathed a sigh of relief upon seeing you on the beach.

“There you are.” Your back tensed at the sound of his voice and the soft tone in which he mumbled the words. “I thought for a second you’d gone back home.”

He was coming to sit beside you on the sand, just close enough where you could feel his body beside yours and the wind carried over his familiar scent but still too far to touch.

Which was for the better in your opinion.

You ignored him even though you could sense his stare on the side of your face and embarrassment was hitting you in rough rolling waves, hoping that the moonlight wasn’t quite bright enough to give away the large tear streaks down your cheeks or how red your nose had gotten from crying.

“Hey, I’m sorry about earlier.” His voice was still soft which was doing absolutely terrible things to your heart and you shook your head slightly, pulling your lip between your teeth to stop yourself from letting out another sob. “I’m sorry about everything in general.”

He was turning to face you more and you braved up enough to spare him even the slightest glance, seeing pure guilt and turmoil on his face.

Meeting your gaze was enough for him to realize how upset you truly were and he was sighing before scooting closer to you in the sand and putting one of his warm hands on your bare arm, now cold from sitting out in the wind for so long. You instinctively leaned into his touch and his other hand gently gripped the side of your face so you couldn’t look away again.

It was such a jarring difference from how he’d touched you earlier, from how he touched you your entire life actually.

“I didn’t mean to be so mean so you or leave you there like that I just… I just panicked I think.” He was rambling now and stuttering through his words, something you knew he often did whenever he got in trouble when you were younger. “You think about something happening for so long and then it actually does and it’s so much more different than you thought, n-not that it wasn’t good I just mean that…”

He trailed off and sighed again and you squeezed your eyes shut to try and ignore the desperate urge to just kiss him and shut him up.

You knew you needed to hear whatever he had to say and he definitely needed to say it, he long overdue owed you a few hundred apologies and it was a lot more than the fact he’d left you high and dry earlier.

It was all the times he glare at you and stolen a smile off your face and every argument you ever had that left you stricken with angry tears and storming out of a room, the embarrassment of being told off at his graduation party and even worse the fact he didn’t kiss you until he was driven by jealously.

“I’m just so sorry.” He seemed like he was ending his monologue there and you gave him a heavy look, slightly nuzzling into his hand before placing your own over it. “Say something please?”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.” Your words were more honest than you expected them to be but his eyes softened when your voice came out weak and croaky, the full expanse of your hurt getting more obvious by the second. “I’m just confused.”

You were turning slightly so you were facing him more and you were certain the two of you looked a bit ridiculous, sitting criss crossed directly opposite of each other with your knees touching and his hand holding your face still, only moving to push some of your hair out of your face.

“I am too.” He was whispering now and you felt the full effect of it low in your stomach, a soft smile on his face now that you were opening up to him a bit more.

Heeseung had never left your life and it was a lot easier to list out all the terrible moments you’d had with him over the softer times, glimpses of days where he’d had a smile just like this wether it was in your direction or not.

He’d been there every time you called for a ride even if he complained about it most of the way home and you’d never stopped listening in extra hard whenever you heard his sweet dorky laugh coming from a few rooms over. You must have been blind to what your mothers had clearly started seeing a long time ago but little things this summer had made you reconsider how deep your dislike for each other goes.

You’d long hesitated to fight with him, starting to rethink your quick jabs and your constant attitude whenever he walked into a room and clearly he’d picked up on more than you ever realized, obvious by him so easily knowing your comfort snacks or the way to calm you down.

“You know,” Your eyes snapped back up to his when he started to speak in a low voice as you waited to hear what he had to say. He looked a bit nervous, like he was about to confess something and you gave him your full attention. “When we used to fight as teenagers, I’d always feel so terrible for making you storm home. Even started playing guitar with my window open so you could hear it.”

Your entire world view shattered just off of that simple admission alone and a heavy sob interrupted whatever else he was going to say, his eyes widening in surprise for just a moment before you were leaning over onto him fully and throwing yourself into a tight hug.

He eagerly accepted although not understanding the true weight he’d just released from your shoulders and you felt him let out a big breath of relief now that you were in his arms, his hands rubbing up and down your back as you cried softly.

You didn’t need to hear him say that he felt the same way that you did, as confusing and scary as it was after projecting your anger onto each other for so long. Your heart tore up thinking about that young girl in her bedroom just holding onto the silly childish hope that the boy next door was actually playing for her, now knowing it wasn’t foolish at all and he’d been right there hoping she was listening.

It hurt you to think about how much time you’d wasted carrying on a childish feud and how whatever this was had started off being such a disaster of jealously and toxic back and forth.

But you were immediately soothed by the never wavering feeling of his arms wrapped tightly around you and the gentle sound of the waves crashing on the shore, spending one last summer on the beach that raised you and creating your first one with the boy you loved.

[fancyfeathers]

Awwww Damian listening in on the his step mom reading to her daughter is so sweet! Considering his childhood😅 Oh Man! If Talia did meet the new wife, she wouldn’t obviously be threatened considering who she is. However, I can see her thinking of Bruce wanting a pet lol.

Idea! If the daughter darling wants to marry once they are older but Damian “tests” them like any good brother.

“None of these men are qualified sister, they are too weak.”

Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling Masterlist

“None of these men are qualified sister, they are too weak.”

“…Damian… you were raised by assassins.”

“So?”

“Most people do not act well to being stabbed.”

“I rest my case.”

Damian would definitely do something like that if it wasn’t for all the men who were interested in her already being scared away by her other brothers. Why would she need anyone else in her life? She has her big brothers to look after her, just don’t grow up and stay little.

He does think his sister is weak but at the same time he is glad she is because he gets to protect her. When he sees his stepmother reading to her and listens in he could not help but think how vulnerable they both were in that moment with their guards down but at the same time they looked happy together and he felt happy because of that.

But then when Talia comes around one day and she sees the two darlings she would genuinely think that of Mother!Darling. In her eyes she is like a cat with her kitten who will hiss and scratch to protect her baby but in the end that cat cannot do actual damage to keep anyone away so eventually they are collared and are nothing more than house pets. Sure they may be married but they are not equals and that imbalance of power is clear as day to anyone with eyes. Though she does acknowledge the role she’s filled in Damian’s life as a mother figure, honestly it would be hard to ignore the fact that when he saw her he asked Talia if it was okay to call his stepmother mom, that is what his sister calls her and he already calls Talia mother and then everyone calls her something along those lines so it would be weird to continue to call her by her first name. Talia sees nothing wrong with his request especially given his fondness for Bruce’s house cats, after all Damian has always liked animals.

Though things are a bit different with his sister, she is indeed his sister by blood and was not fortunate enough to have been raised knowing how to defend herself properly against those who try to harm her. In a way I think she grows rather fond of Damian’s little sister, it is good that her son is able to find comfort with someone and let his guard down, having a strong one-sided bond with his own flesh and blood.

Say if something happened that split up their little family, Talia may find it heart to take her in since Damian is so fond of her and it is far to cruel to separate them now that Damian has decided a part of his own life to protecting her.

[sim0nril3y]

Meet the Family

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Civilian!Reader Scenario: Simon has the joy of meeting your family and finding out why don't you see or talk about them all that much. This brings up some unwanted memories and feelings for him too. Warnings: No mask Simon (It's my personal headcanon in his regular life he probably wouldn't wear it), family drama, shouting, very small mention of Simon's childhood, family disapproval, family arguing, reader has family, reader has siblings, family names are established but no descriptions, canon-typical swearing.

It appeared that your phone was making more of a ruckus than usual later. It seemed to buzz and beep much more frequently, each time your eyes cast down to check it they narrowed, then rolled before you pushed the device far, far away from where you had to interact with it. Yet still it actively vied for your attention. “Everything okay, babe?” Simon quizzed, pulling the cork out of the wine he’d chosen and beginning to pour you a glass. “Fine.” You short answer replied, picking up the glass and taking a large gulp.

Taking a seat opposite Simon battled internally about whether to push this conversation anymore. He wondered, if the situation was reversed if you would have tried to get more information out of him. Bloody hell. You would. “I just couldn’t help but notice you seemed a little… upset by your phone.” Nodding his head in the direction of the device. “Is something up?”

For a moment you paused, mauling over the situation for a moment before letting out a low huff and answering. “My sister is having a ‘get-together’ for her anniversary…” You announced with a heavy amount of disdain in your voice. “We’ve been invited.” Of course, you’d mentioned your family before but until this point Simon had never met them and the opportunity had never been there. “Honestly, I’m surprised I’m invited Anna said it’ll just be close family…”

“Well, I guess you count as close family considering you’re her sister, love.” Simon pointed out and you let out a low huff again. “Who else is going to be there?” “My mum and dad. My little brother Peter. Obviously, my older sister Anna, her husband Barney and their son Hunter.” Simon couldn’t help but frown at that. It would be a lot of your family to meet at once. “And do you… want to go?”

Again, you didn’t have a response right away, eyes darting away before back towards him. “I… I don’t know…” Then shaking your head. “Anna is begging me to come, but I know that is only to get the heat off her because if I’m there then all my parent’s attention will fall to me and they will explain exactly where I’ve gone wrong with my life.” Simon couldn’t help but frown at that comment, he didn’t like the thought of your family speaking poorly of you. A heavy sigh escaped your mouth. “Would… you want to go?” The question came out tiny and vulnerable, like you might scare him off with that alone.

“They know about me?” Simon quizzed, he’d never met them and he’d never really pressed to do that, he was in love with you and that was all he needed in his life. “They do…” You replied evenly. “They don’t approve... It isn’t because of you.” You quickly add with wide eyes. “They don’t approve of anyone outside of the family. They hated any girl that Peter brought home and they tolerate Barney, but that is only because they gave them a grandchild to fawn over.” You explained before frowning. “Si, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t want to come…”

For a moment he mauled over his options, he could go and accept whatever snide comments and berating came from your family, or he could send you to the wolves and stay home like a coward. Simon Riley was not a coward. “Tell her we’ll be there.” He leaned over to clink his glass against her own.

It was a bit of a drive to Anna’s home she shared with her husband and their son, but that gave you plenty of time to fill in all the dirty details about your family. You had started with your older sister, she was seen as the golden child and your parents bragged about almost everything that she did, her perfect marriage, her perfect children, her perfect house and her perfect holiday home. You explained, Anna had gone to a top University to study finance, but during her gap year galivanting about the US she’d met Barney who’d promptly fallen in love with her and got her pregnant. This wouldn’t typically be too big of a problem, apart from the fact that Anna been engaged before setting off and in a desperate need to escape the monotony of her relationship and her perfect life she’d thrown it all away from another lad.

It was a blow to her parents that their perfect eldest daughter had this mishap, however the fact that Barney came from an incredibly wealthy family and owned his own tech company certainly helped ease him into the family. Then their grandson Hunter came into the picture and everything was a perfect ending from there.

On the other hand, there was your younger brother Peter who had barely scraped by in his school and your parents had to persuade Universities to accept him. He spent more times in clubs than in his classes. Your parents saw him as a typical boy, causing some trouble and chasing the ladies. Boys will be boys; they’d excused with a hearty laugh as Peter would be trotted to the cells for indecent exposer or public indecency. Still even after all the trouble he’d caused Peter was still the apple of their eyes, your mother fawned over him and your father tried moulding him into his protégé.

Then there was you. With a sister that was perfect and a brother that they dotted on that left very little time or energy for you. It seemed like you just slipped through the cracks. Even when they did have time spare for you every decision, you’d made they hadn’t approved. In their eyes, you were simply the wild little fuck-up. It pained and riled Simon that anyone thought of you as anything but perfect and good and kind.

Once they arrived at your sisters’ home Simon was surprised to find that it was an expensive looking townhouse that had been renovated to have some modern features. This strangle matched the dreamhouse that you’d muttered to him one night in your post-sex chatter, it made Simon wonder who had desired the house first, maybe it was you and Anna had simply stolen that dream to taunt you. Approached the modern frosted glass door, it opened and out stepped an older woman with a disguised smile on her face, dressed in a smart, conservative dress with sharp kitten heels. Your hand squeezed his own as you approached, announcing nicely. “Mum…” Ah, your mother, Cynthia…

“Hello darling.” Her voice was soft but hiding something, like a sickly sweet venom that was encasing you both. You had mentioned that she was high strung and highly critical, that remained to be seen. If there was one thing that Cynthia enjoyed in life it was gossiping, followed by bragging about her family, or at least some of her family members, certainly not you, you’d joked to Simon but there was a pained reality to that snide remark. “Look at you, that is certainly an interesting dress…” She observed, cupping your face then. “You look very tired, are you sleeping well?” The snide remarks had already begun, Simon observed.

You complained lowly. “Mum…” Then looked towards Simon, eyes pleading for some form of help or safety or escape but only found his own dark set that matched your own fear. “This is-” Cynthia cut you off and turned her viper grin towards at him, those dangerous eyes scanned him and searched for any little weakness or vulnerability. “This must be Simon.” Cynthia let out an almost cynical laugh. “Now, I must ask your sister to set another place, we weren’t sure that you were real…” It was another little dig that made you wince.

Cynthia then allowed the two of you to follow her further into the house, a lounge area stood before them and three men lingered inside of it. An older man sat on the sofa, drink in hand and head drooping, another around Simon’s age stood behind a small make-shift bar, cleaning glasses and straightening bottles of the labels faced out and proud and then across the room a younger man was texting on his phone. “Simon, make yourself comfortable with the men. That is my husband, Harold. This is my son-in-law, Barney.” Cynthia even gifted him a snide smile, the same she had done to Simon, they were outsiders after all, not as important as blood, simply there to give her grandchildren. “And that is my son Peter~”

Turning to you and lowering her voice, Cynthia said. “Darling, don’t worry that you didn’t bring a present, your sister understands that you don’t make a lot of money-” “N-no, I just left it at home.” You attempted to explain but your mother just chortled lowly and squeezed your shoulder. “Oh, I’m sure… just like how Peter ate all your Christmas chocolate when you were 10, hmm?” Then she poked your tummy in jest. “But I think we all know where it went.”

Simon forced himself to grit his teeth, looking between and watching you purse your lips, accepting the vicious attack with a tight smile and glossy eyes. “Now, don’t make that face~” Cynthia smirked directly at you, as if knowing she was pushing your buttons. “Come, your sister will want some help in the kitchen, I’m sure you’ll survive being apart from your boyfriend for five minutes, hmm?” Then looking towards Simon and asking. “You won’t mind if I borrow her, will you?”

More than anything he wanted to deny her, snatch you up into his side and away from anymore of her cruel remarks, but her claw-like hands were already circling you and tugging you from the room before he had a chance. The next moment, a presence walked up behind him and Simon turned to see a very happy looking man stood there. “Hey man…” A thick American accent rolled from him. “My name is Barney, you must be Simon, right?” He was quick to shake his hand and comment. “Quite the grip there, you play golf?”

Shaking his head Simon followed him back to where he’d been lingering (or probably hiding) behind his bar. “Do you drink, man? What’s your poison?” Barney asked enthusiastically, very proudly gesturing to the array of bottles that were placed behind the bar, squeaky clean but hardly used. “Whiskey. Neat.” Then leaning against the bar and waiting for it to be made. Another approached, this time your brother, tucking his phone away into his pocket as he sidled up beside him, elbows resting on the bar too, matching him stance for stance. “Simon, right? The latest addition to our fucked up little family.” Peter commented, his tone just as snide as his mother’s – the apple didn’t fall far, he supposed. “I’m sure my sister told you all about me…”

“She mentioned a few things…” Simon answered evenly, reaching out to take the offered drink from Barney, drinking it down a little too quickly to appear casual. Bloody hell, he’d been on battlefields and felt less anxious. “Well, I’ve got a few stories about my sister that I’m sure you’ll want to hear too~” The young lad began before Simon glanced in his direction, testing and bothered by his presence.

Sensing the impending tension Barney let out a hearty chuckle and said. “Maybe another time, huh?” Then giving Peter a pointed look. “Simon… what do you do for a job?” He asked in a friendly enough way, this seemed to catch the attention of Harold who actually glanced in his direction, quietly accessing and judging, it felt like you were the only normal one to actually come out of this family. “I’m in the special forces.” Simon explained, keeping his answers short and sweet, not allowing too many details to slip out, it wouldn’t be professional. They all had different reactions to this little piece of information. Peter quirked a brow whilst Barney grinned and nodded. “That’s tight. Respect, man.”

“A solider…” Peter muttered. “Lieutenant, actually.” Simon corrected in a sharp tone. There wasn’t many things in life he was proud about but you and his career were among the only few.

Again, your brother seemed to stir from beside him. “So…” Looking at him, wanting to judge Simon’s reaction. “How many people you killed?” The question was so crass that it actually made Barney gasp before letting out a nervous laugh and saying. “Pete, I’m not sure you can ask questions like that, man…” Then another laugh before giving his brother-in-law a soft punch on the shoulder, followed by a pointed look, don’t push.

There was this clear power struggle that Peter was trying to win. This happened often with rich boys like your brother, they saw Simon as a threat because he was physically much more impending than them, feeling even worse when they discovered that Simon wasn’t as dumb as they thought he looked.

“Not something that I keep count of…” Simon answered keeping his face straight, remaining unbothered. It was a good answer, it was formal and dignified, not to mention filled with some honesty. It wasn’t like Simon could even keep count anymore, even if he had wanted to. Peter seemed unimpressed with that answer and simply huffed before saying. “Bet you could think of at least five different ways to kill me in here, right?” Again, this spiked the interest of Harold, glancing in their direction.

Another challenge. Another prod. Another opportunity to attempt to make Simon look unhinged. Attempting to break the tension Barney laughed awkwardly. “This joker-” “I could think at least ten.” Simon retorted, dark eyes watching Peter to see that smugness falter for just a moment as true fear sank in. From across the room for just a split second Harold smirked then it washed away as he finished his fifth drink of the night.

The room was thick with an air of tension as you stepped inside looking completely flustered. “It’s uh… it’s time for dinner.” You informed them, frowning as you tried to access the atmosphere, approaching Simon to rest a delicate hand on his forearm, wrapping yourself around the limb. The room cleared out as Barney escorted his in-laws to his dinning room. Gazing up at Simon, you asked. “You alright?”

Simon’s eyes seemed to focus on where Peter had been escorted from the room, watching that area on alert for a few moments before his gaze flittered back in your direction. “Told your brother I could think of ten ways to kill him in this room alone…”

You blinked. Slow and calculating. Attempting to understand the words that Simon had just rushed in your direction. “Excuse me?” You muttered, staring up into his eyes in confusion. “Why… why would you say-” “He was pushing me.” There was an edge of frustration to his tone. You brother had gotten under Simon’s skin a lot more than he was willing to admit aloud. Reaching up you cupped his face and looked into his eyes with such care and sincerity, it really did pain you to witness your family treating him in a way that left him so anxious and wound up. “I believe you.” You whispered. “I believe you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. My fucking family… It’s my family, they make it their mission to push and prod and make your life misery. I’m sorry-”

A short huff came from Simon, leaning in to kiss your forehead gently and replying. “You don’t ever apologies for any of them.” He told you, voice firm and sure. There was no part of this that was your fault. You were born into a family of cynical fakers, wanting to make everyone else’s lives as miserable as their own. He hadn’t even been around them for an hour yet, but Simon could see that you were the only good thing to come from your family. He could force himself to survive the rest of the dinner party for you… but when this was over, he never wanted to see these people again.

“Come on, now…” Your mothers voice entered the lounge and she lingered in the doorway, big fake smile on her lips and glass of wine in hand. “You were late to the party and now you’ll be late for dinner too…” Cynthia chortled, clearly still holding that grudge. “I swear, my darling girl would be late to her own funeral too…” The comment was made as she swayed down the hallway towards the dining room, Simon simply grit his teeth and continued to bite his tongue. A few more hours, he reminded himself constantly.

The dinner that was severed was nice enough. Honestly, the only cooking that you actually enjoyed nowadays was anything that Simon served up for you and it was something he was more than happy to take care of for you. It was mundane and simple and peaceful, just for some time he could force his noisy brain to shut off, it simply wasn’t warfare.

You sat beside him, food pushing around your plate, probably each little biting comment from your mother stripped away any hunger from you. Cynthia had persuaded your siblings to list all their recent achievements to you, which they seemed all too happy to do. Maybe they knew that if all that vitriol that poured from your mother was aimed at you, then they’d continue to escape it… or maybe they enjoyed it because they were just as cruel as she was.

“Are you enjoying the food?” Cynthia quirked a soft brow at Simon, it was a strange observation but Simon noted that your mother wore a face so similar to your own, maybe more than the rest of your siblings but not even one of your expressions matched. There was so much pure and true joy and easiness in your smile, but each time your mother did the same it seemed like it might crack her face into tiny pieces. “I’m sure you aren’t used to a good homecooked meal, hmm?” Then laughing lowly. “Especially with this one’s cooking…” Pointing a fork in your direction.

“It’s fine.” Simon responded evenly, clearly not to exaggerated praise that your mother had been expecting, simply narrowing her eyes and taking back another gulp of wine. “I like to cook for us…” His hand then rests on your knee beneath the table, reminding you that you weren’t alone facing your horrid family, but that Simon had your back. “Between the two of us, I have more time to cook, anyway.” Then he shrugged, gazing in your direction and seeing your desperation to find safety and warmth within him. “With all the hours that she works and then the time she spends on her art, I like to keep her fed…” Too afraid to continue aloud, Simon thought, keep her warm, provided for her, keep her happy, keep her satisfied. Just… keep her.

A deep scoff came from Cynthia then, another big glug of wine until her glass was empty. It seemed that Simon had given Peter the opportunity to speak then, smirking from across the table. “Speaking of work…” Those dangerous eyes loomed as you sat a little straighter in your chair. “Heard from a friend that you missed that interview dad set up…” The comment was thrown out there so casually but you were left reeling as you knew the chaos that simple comment would cause. Besides, how did he even know that? There wasn’t a chance in the world that Peter had friends to be able to tell him that information, so what? Was he following you? Keeping tabs on you? Before you even had the chance to interrogate him Cynthia spoke first.

“No, no…” Placing down the wine bottle onto the table with a heavy thud, eyes fixed on you. “Please tell me that isn’t true.” Raising her brows, as if waiting for you to deny Peter’s allegations but you remained sheepishly quiet. “You lied to me.” There was a fiery rage in her eyes now and you knew that you were in for it. “You told me that you went. I can’t believe you would lie to your own mother…” Your mouth opened then, as if to defend yourself but Cynthia was much too quick to continue her tirade. “We have spoken about this again and again… I made it clear it is time to give up on this silly little fantasy that you’ve been holding onto. It is time to grow up and join the real world. You need to be more like your brother and your sister…” Gesturing wildly to them as Anna sat almost ashamed with her gaze down to her lap and Peter sat there with a smarmy smile the instigator of this.

Again, you opened your mouth, but her hand came up sharp in your direction. “Do you know the strings your father had to pull to organise that interview?” Then gesturing towards Harold who seemed completely unphased, cutting his steak into another bitesize piece whilst his wife continued to berate their daughter before the audience. “You are such an ungrateful brat and you always have been. When will you understand? You have absolutely zero desirable qualities so finding a decent job will be very difficult for you… who in their right mind is going to want to hire someone like you, hmm?”

Everyone apart from Cynthia and Peter appeared mortified, Anna looked to you with horror on her face and then Barney spoke, careful smile on his face. “She still had plenty of time to figure out what she wants to do, right? Anna took a gap year during college… Pete did the same… So, she isn’t going abroad or whatever, instead she’s trying to… to… figure out if she can follow her passion, I think it’s-” “Be quiet.” Cynthia growled at him then, teeth grit. “Don’t talk such nonsense… Peter and Anna were working hard at college and needed a break to find themselves and after returned to college and get their degrees. What does she have? Nothing. I couldn’t even convince her to apply to any colleges… She is a lazy, stubborn, silly little girl and you are chasing a hopeless dream-” “Enough.”

Every set of eyes then turned to look at Simon who sat with a furious look present on his face. At the beginning of the evening, he could maybe accept those biting little comments, he could certainly accept the way that Peter had provoked him, Simon could even accept the way that your mother had sat there bragging about your siblings but he wasn’t going to allow her to utterly humiliate you like this. “You don’t fuckin’ talk to her that way.” Carefully from beside him, you muttered his name, a soft plead to try and calm the fight that seemed inevitable now. “No.” He told you firmly, quietly, gazing down at you with a set jaw and narrowed eyes. “I won’t just sit there and let her fuckin’ talk to you like this… I wont… I can’t…”

It wasn’t like Simon had grown up in a good household. It was clearly different from your own. Simon had witnessed his father completely decimate any good in his family and he was too young and too small and too scared to stop him or do anything. This is why he is the man he is today; he wouldn’t allow that again and seeing your family ripping you to shreds, tearing apart any good and hope and light inside of you was too much for him. Not you. Never you.

“Simon, please. You simply don’t understand...” Cynthia began. “My daughter lives in this word of make believe where she thinks she is going to become and artists and be able to make money and buy big houses like her sister. It’s just ridiculous. I’ve tried getting through to her, but-” “Your daughter is a fuckin’ adult.” Simon growled then, leaning into the table slightly so he could talk across at her. “She doesn’t need you to find her a job and she doesn’t need you to approve the choices that she makes in her life.” Simon growled, feeling this need to protect you and keep you safe, that very same one that had grown for his mother in his childhood. Different, but… the same. “Your daughter… your daughter is fuckin’ amazing. There isn’t a thing about her that needs to change. She’s intelligent and she’s soft and kind and she’s really fuckin’ talented and I wonder how all of that managed to happen when she grew up around you cunts-” The entire table seemed to gasp in unison.

There seemed to be this stunned silence before everyone erupted, Peter almost fell off his chair laughing, whilst baby Hunter wailed from the commotion. Cynthia stood stark upright, jabbing a finger in his direction. “Unacceptable! Disgusting! Unacceptable! He’s an animal! He’s feral!” Stalk through the house on a tirade of insults aimed in his direction with her husband trailing behind her. Anna was trying to hopelessly clean a puddle of wine from where it had teetered over onto the table. “It’s fucking vintage!” There were real tears in her eyes, much to Simon’s surprise.

Just then Barney stood up, bouncing his son in his arms and looking between you and Simon. “I think… I think it would be best if you guys left.” There was sorrow in his eyes as he suggested it, not wanting to be unkind but just not wanting anymore drama. It was probably for the best even if Simon did have a few more choice words for them.

The entire car ride home you were unusually quiet beside him. He was actually a little lost on how to handle this situation. There weren’t a part of him that was sorry for what he’d said to your family, or more specifically your mother. Simon just couldn’t handle the fact that she could talk to you in such a vile way. There was only so much that Simon was willing to take and he’d lost it. Fuck, had he scared you? Were you mad at him? Were you sad for causing a rift in your family? Had he even caused a rift? Clearly, they hadn’t thought very much of you before he’d been there…

A small sniffle from beside him caught his attention, glancing in your direction and under the glow of the streetlamps Simon saw your face wet with tears. Without hesitation Simon signalled and pulled his truck onto an empty road, clambering from the driver’s seat and around to yank open your door. A moment later his arms were around you, hand supporting the back of your head burying your face into the crook of his shoulder. “You’re alright. Shh. You’re alright, babe.”

After a few moments of allowing, you to just sob into his shoulder, your voice muffled against his shirt. “Don’t ca-care what they s-say about me-” “Well, I do.” There was a thick edge to his voice, pulling back to cup your face and looking for any sign of fight towards your family but you seemed defeated, you seemed emotionally drained. Where was that witty girl that had corned him on a night out? Where was the one that had to almost twist his arm to open up? Where was that fight for her own pretty self? “I care about what they say about you because they are dead fuckin’ wrong, babe. No one deserved to be talked to like that. I won’t allow it.”

There was something deeper simmering here behind all this. There was something that Simon didn’t want to confess or discuss. The berating. The belittling. The treatment of less than… This was something that Simon wouldn’t allow for you because he had experienced it and much worse. “You don’t deserve it.” It was like Simon was talking to all the people in his life that hadn’t deserved the fate they were given. You. Him. His mum. His brother. His friends he’d lost. The soldiers that had died in his arms. “Okay?” “Okay.”

Masterlist | Ask | 04-02-2024

[zombvic]

enemies to lovers w kenan??🙏🙏

EYE TO EYE (kenan yildiz x reader)

summary : in which y/n and a certain turkish-german football player dont see eye to eye

face claim : no one exact

notes : thank you for the request !! hope its like you wanted :3

pairings : kenan yildiz x reader , childhood "enemies"

Ever since you can remember, Kenan has been a constant presence in your life. From childhood, you two never saw eye to eye. He was always around, whether it was a family dinner, a holiday gathering, or a neighborhood barbecue. The day your families became intertwined marked the start of what seemed like the ideal love story—the boy and girl next door. But reality was far from that.

As your families grew closer, it seemed like opposites attracted for them. Kenan was considered the typical jock: charismatic, popular, always surrounded by friends, and stereotypically, a football player. You, on the other hand, were far more reserved but possessed a strangely attractive confidence.

Kenan always challenged you. As the years passed, your dynamic didn't change. Your parents wanted you to be friends, but neither of you made the effort. Despite your parents' close friendship and frequent attempts to foster a bond between you, neither cared enough.

As you both grew older, the dynamics shifted subtly. The teasing evolved into playful banter, and the challenges turned into a mutual respect for each other's strengths. Yet, beneath the surface, there was an unspoken understanding that perhaps there was more to your relationship than met the eye.

"Y/n, the Yildiz family invited us for a get-together. Make sure you're on your best behavior," your mother said. You never really understood it; it wasn't you who made a huge deal out of your petty arguments. Hell, it wasn't even you who started the arguments. But it was never Kenan who got scolded; no, he was too perfect for that, wasn't he?

"And please, no more fighting. The last barbecue was more than enough." Ah, yes, the last barbecue—it ended with a small fire and a broken ankle. Obviously, it was my ankle; his football career would be in shambles if he broke his ankle during a friends and family event. But it wasn't my fault; he brought up the famous debate of who's the GOAT of Formula 1. I mean, you're literally German, what do you mean you don't think Schumi is the GOAT? The debate was supposed to be settled by a friendly game of pingpong, but it didn't end so friendly. What was I supposed to do, not dodge the racket he THREW at me? In my humble opinion, my actions were more than justified.

As my mom knocked on their front door, we were greeted by Engin, Kenan's father. Their house was cozy, shared between the parents and three boys. Every time we went over, the atmosphere was welcoming.

Kenan stood at the doorway, a sheepish grin on his face as he welcomed us inside. "Hey, Y/n," he greeted me, his tone surprisingly friendly despite our history.

"Hey," I replied, trying to mask the uneasy feeling his presence always seemed to stir in me. His eyes held some sort of amusement, as if he could sense my discomfort. I walked past to enter the familiar space of their kitchen connected to the backyard entrance.

Engin ushered us towards the backyard where the rest of the family and a few guests were gathered around the barbecue grill. Kenan's brothers were playing football in the yard, their laughter blending with the hum of conversation.

"Hope you're hungry," Engin chuckled, flipping a burger on the grill. "We've got plenty to go around."

Kenan slid next to me as we walked to the table, his voice low. "So, how's life?" he asked with genuine interest.

I hesitated for a moment, surprised by his sudden sincerity. "Um, it's been alright," I replied cautiously. "Busy with school and all."

He nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, I get that. Are you still into that video editing thing you were doing last summer?"

I couldn't help but feel a twinge of surprise that he remembered. "Yeah, actually. I've gotten some offers from certain companies."

"That's really cool," he said with a nod, a hint of admiration in his voice.

We reached the table where the food was laid out, and Kenan held out a plate for me to take first. I couldn't help but notice the small gesture of consideration, a far cry from our usual banter or tense interactions.

"Thanks," I said quietly, feeling a flicker of warmth towards him that I hadn't expected. Maybe, just maybe, there was more to Kenan than the cocky football player I always assumed him to be.

As the evening went on, the atmosphere at the barbecue shifted from tentative civility to a surprising ease between Kenan and Y/n. Engin's expert grilling skills were matched by his knack for storytelling, keeping everyone entertained with humorous anecdotes from his youth. The smell of grilled meat filled the air, mingling with laughter and the occasional cheer from the ongoing soccer match in the yard.

Kenan and Y/n found themselves drawn into a playful banter over who could stack their burger higher with toppings, each trying to outdo the other with combinations that ranged from classic to unconventional. It became a mini competition, with Kenan daring Y/n to try his "ultimate burger creation" while she countered with her own daring concoction of flavors.

"You're seriously putting pineapple and jalapenos together?" Kenan raised an eyebrow, eyeing Y/n's bold choice of toppings skeptically.

"Why not?" Y/n grinned mischievously, carefully balancing the overflowing tower of burger ingredients. "It's a winning combo."

Kenan chuckled, shaking his head in mock disbelief as he expertly flipped another burger on the grill. "Alright, I'll admit, you've got guts. Let's see if it actually tastes as good as it looks."

As the sun began to set, casting a golden hue over the backyard, Kenan's brothers approached with mischievous grins on their faces. "Hey, Kenan! Y/n! How about a friendly game of football?" they called out enthusiastically, kicking a soccer ball playfully towards them.

Kenan glanced at Y/n with a raised eyebrow, a hint of amusement in his eyes. "You guys sure you want to challenge us? You might regret it," he teased, his competitive spirit already rising to the surface.

Y/n chuckled, feeling a surprising rush of excitement at the prospect of playing alongside Kenan instead of against him for once. "Bring it on, boys," she replied confidently, flashing a grin that mirrored Kenan's.

With a nod from Kenan, they divided into teams—Kenan and Y/n against his brothers. The game started with playful banter and competitive energy, but something shifted as they played. Kenan's skill on the field was undeniable, his passes precise and his movements fluid. Y/n found herself naturally falling into sync with him, their teamwork surprisingly effortless.

They communicated with quick glances and nods, strategizing on the fly and covering each other's positions seamlessly. Kenan's brothers put up a good fight, but Kenan and Y/n's teamwork proved to be a formidable force.

"Nice pass!" Kenan called out as Y/n dribbled past Eren with skillful footwork, earning an approving nod from him.

"You're pretty good at football, Kenan. You should consider becoming a professional," Y/n joked with a playful smirk.

Kenan chuckled, shaking his head modestly. "I don't know about that. I'd probably miss all the glamour of backyard games like this."

"Get a room, lovebirds," His brothers teased from the sidelines, a mischievous grin on their face.

Y/n rolled her eyes, playfully nudging Kenan. "Ignore him. They're just jealous that we make a better team than they do."

The game continued with laughter, cheers, and occasional playful taunts exchanged between teams. As the friendly competition progressed, Kenan and you found themselves enjoying each other's company in a way they hadn't before. The usual tension and rivalry gave way to shared goals and a shared sense of accomplishment each time they scored or defended together.

As the sun dipped lower in the sky and the game wound down, The brothers conceded defeat with good humor, congratulating Kenan and Y/n on their victory.

"You guys were awesome!" Kenans brother exclaimed, grinning broadly as he bumped fists with Kenan and Y/n. "We'll have to challenge you again sometime."

Kenan chuckled, clapping him on the shoulder. "Anytime, little bro. Just be prepared to lose again," he teased playfully.

As they gathered their breath and laughter echoed in the cooling evening air, Y/n couldn't help but feel a newfound sense of camaraderie with Kenan. Working together had brought out a side of him she hadn't seen before—the focused, determined athlete who also knew how to have fun and appreciate teamwork.

"Thanks for the game, Y/n," Kenan said quietly, his tone sincere as he glanced at her with a soft smile.

You nodded, feeling a smile tug at your lips in response. "Likewise, Kenan. It was... refreshing," she admitted, surprising herself with the honesty of her words.

As they shared a meaningful smile, the evening continued with laughter, shared stories, and the hope for more moments like this—where they weren't basically on the verge of killing eachother, but actual friends, if not more.

im sorry this kinda doesnt have plot and sounds kinda npc but erm ! ignore that plz

[bushwskq]

Father Charlie Mayhew x witch!reader

cw: 18+

PART 1

PART 2

AUTHOR'S NOTE: So what should I say? Well this is my first fanfic on Tumblr and English is not my first language. Thanks Google Translate. This one-shot came from a girl in great need of Nicholas Chavez, I kindly ask that you please forgive the mistakes. As soon as I can I will write the second part with more about Father Charlie, this is just the introduction...

I wrote it listening to Tear You Apart and Seven Wonders

Thank you for your attention!

You thought you had everything under control when you moved to this small town. Away from family or acquaintances that you had no desire to see again with a comfortable home decorated in your own special way. You were given the title of exotic by the residents of the place, they didn't seem like they would throw you into the fire like the witches of Salem but you knew that some were afraid of you even if you didn't show magic in public.

Your always black clothes didn't go unnoticed although no one ever said anything directly to you, you wore extravagant necklaces from time to time but what you kept around your neck was often a pentagram and a cross that reflected every movement you made. Walking calmly with a lit cigarette between your fingers, you observed the crowd of people entering the city's main church. You weren't able to determine which audience that place attracted because they ranged from children to old women marked by time.

For a moment you considered going into the crowd, it had been so long since you stepped foot in a Catholic place and memories of your childhood flashed through your mind. You weren't going home anytime soon, there was nothing stopping you from getting in other than your mind. You knew that sermons about sin wouldn't make you change your beliefs, you found help by practicing witchcraft (or what people called the practices you practiced) your relationship with magic was something different from anything you knew and you felt welcomed worshiping their own gods.

You remembered your first mentor, she taught you the basis of everything you know, helping you deal with your complicated feelings during this process. Respect although resentment about the religions that condemned your existence was always present in you. Taking a deep breath while looking around, you crossed the street towards the church without thinking. You stubbed out your cigarette on the sidewalk then took a deep breath until you walked up the stairs.

The church was big, the first thing you thought of was the large tithe they earned on the faithful. You looked for a pew, sitting down at the end then a few minutes later the mass started, it was everything the way you remembered it. Except for one thing.

The priest was too handsome to be a priest, you thought, the man must have been a few years older than you. His hair was perfectly combed back to highlight his chiseled face, his jaw clenched as he waited to speak. You quickly realized that the young women didn't come just because of the Lord's word. The mass continued while the pentagram on your chest weighed as if saying you were in the wrong place, the priest's firm voice walked through the church with its hoarse timbre. You would definitely be lying if you said you weren't attracted to the man.

“What’s his name?” You shyly asked a nun sitting in the front seat. “Fa-father Charlie Mayhew.” The woman responded with a small smile before turning her attention to the lectern. You thanked him politely as you stared at the man, you knew his name now. Father Charlie Mayhew You recited in your mind as the mass continued.

You couldn't take your eyes off that pretty face, in disbelief that someone so young had chosen this vocation. You didn't hear anything until he spoke then it stopped again like a cycle, even with the clothes on you could tell that his body was defined as the outline of his muscles could still be seen. Then he looked at you, you thought about avoiding it but it was too late. Caught like a naughty child doing something he shouldn't, you kept looking until he looked away. You smiled internally.

The hours passed towards the end of the celebration, many people headed towards the exit but not you. Never going with the flow of things you began to explore the church, observing the colorful stained glass windows and the pattern of lit candles. In your peripheral vision you saw Father Charlie talking to a couple, his voice was relaxed although he still maintained his posture.

You stopped at another stained glass window, your eyes attentive to the details. “You’re new here, aren’t you?” Father Charlie asked standing next to you, you could smell him and it almost made you fall over. “The church is not used to a new face.” He said, his clear voice leaving you quiet for a moment before he began “I recently moved to the city, Father. In fact, this is the first church I’ve been to in a long time.” His voice doesn't show shame like other people do when they talk to Charlie.

Sometimes intimidated by the man's posture or beauty.“I'm glad to hear that.” you could see the sincerity in his words although he tried to hide something. “Know that the church is open to welcome you, dear.” Charlie approached, turning his face to him: “God has ways of rescuing his lost children to salvation. No matter what circumstance.”

His gaze dropped to your chest where the pentagram rested somewhat hidden by your clothes. His heavy hand touched the necklace with a little force. “The confessional is open on Wednesdays. If you are interested, I will be waiting for you.” He left without looking back, leaving you uneasy as you watched him.

[deliciousangelfestival]

I Hate It When You're Drunk - 6

Character: bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Princess!Reader

Summary: A forbidden love between a princess and her bodyguard. They love each other deeply, but their relationship is threatened by the tyrant king's oppressive rule and their differing social statuses.

I Hate It When You're Drunk Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist || If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee on : Ko-fi 🙏🏻

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️

The news of the rebellion made headlines, dividing public opinion. Some supported it, despising the tyrant king, while the majority dismissed it as futile, knowing the king's power was insurmountable.

However, the rebellion news quickly died when a new announcement captivated everyone's attention: the princess of Veridian was getting married to her personal guard.

It was a fairytale come to life. The official story painted a romantic picture of childhood friends whose bond blossomed into love as they grew older.

This narrative enchanted the nation and international media, drawing interest from all corners. People saw Bucky as incredibly fortunate—a commoner rising to become a royal consort, a prince. Suddenly, both of you were thrust into the spotlight.

You were accustomed to attention, but this was more intense than ever before. Now recognized by everyone in the country, Bucky found the newfound scrutiny overwhelming.

Since the wedding announcement, you and Bucky had been constantly busy with interviews and photoshoots. The flashing cameras and endless questions left Bucky feeling numb inside, his mind preoccupied with thoughts of his captured comrades.

Flashback Start

You had asked the king to show mercy to the rebels. Bucky vividly remembered the scene. Leonard was in the glasshouse, a place of enchanting beauty that looked like it belonged in a fairy tale. It was a gift for his wife, your mother. The tyrant king had made it as beautiful as a painting.

One of the birds, an eagle, landed gracefully on Leonard’s shoulder—a symbol of wild freedom now tamed into domesticity, much like Bucky’s transformation from an idealistic rebel to a figure constrained by duty.

Leonard, his face a mask of composed authority, offered the bird a snack. “Sure,” he said, his tone icy and detached. “No more bloodshed since your wedding is coming soon.”

The way he said it lacked genuine comfort, but at least he had promised. "Thank you, father," you said, bowing before leaving with Bucky.

Flashback End

His mind replayed Leonard’s smirk as he promised no bloodshed. He clenched his fists, the weight of his comrades' fates heavy on his heart.

“Bucky!”

He snapped out of his daydream, looking around in confusion. “Huh?” He saw you, the royal tailor, and the tailor's assistant staring at him. Bucky had been too immersed in the harsh reality that the tyrant king knew his plot. He still hadn't had the chance to visit his comrades who had been caught.

“Are you tired?” you asked, coming closer and touching his forehead. Perhaps he was tired; since the royal wedding announcement, both of you had non-stop schedules, constantly talking to the media.

Today, Bucky was meeting the royal tailor for the first time to be measured for the wedding.

“Your Highness, we are honored to be part of this occasion,” Sergio, the senior tailor who the royal family always chose to make their clothing, said as he bowed his head. Since King Leonard's reign began, Sergio had only designed for the king and you. Now, there was a new person, and it was for a special occasion.

You nodded. “I’ll leave you three alone.” You took another glance at Bucky, noting his dazed expression.

After the door closed, the tailor started measuring Bucky’s body. “You have a wide shoulder, sir,” Sergio commented, running his measuring tape across Bucky's back.

Bucky didn't know how to respond to the compliment, feeling awkward and out of place.

“It’s fit for someone carrying a big burden,” Sergio added, his voice low.

Bucky flinched. Did the tailor know something?

Sergio continued measuring, his movements precise and professional. “I’ve been here since before the king was born. My only advice is to keep your head down.”

“Democracy is dead,” Bucky muttered, the weight of his words heavy with resignation.

“It died for me the moment we servants had to wipe the blood spatter from the castle walls,” Sergio whispered, his voice barely audible.

Bucky's throat tightened, his tongue feeling like lead. The tailor’s words struck a chord, a stark reminder of the brutal reality he was facing. He clenched his fists, trying to steady himself as Sergio continued his work, the room filled with a tense silence.

The assistant worked quietly, taking notes and handing Sergio various tools. Bucky’s mind raced, thoughts of his captured comrades and the looming threat of Leonard’s wrath gnawing at him.

He forced himself to focus on the present, to endure the moment, knowing that every step he took brought him closer to his goal of freeing you and the country from the king's tyranny.

After Sergio finished measuring, he looked Bucky in the eye. “Remember what I said,” he whispered. “Keep your head down.”

Bucky nodded, his jaw tight. “Thank you,” he managed to say, strained but sincere.

As the tailor and his assistant left, Bucky stood alone in the room, the weight of his situation pressing down on him. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for the upcoming battles.

But it seemed like the battle had come sooner. From the window, Bucky saw you in the garden, walking together with Duke Cassian.

You were wandering around the garden, trying to clear your mind. This was what you wanted, but why didn't you feel butterflies in your stomach? Bucky's attitude made you nervous, filling you with doubts.

Was this what people meant by cold feet before a wedding?

"Having second thoughts?"

You jumped as Cassian's voice broke the silence.

"Why are you still here?" you asked, a bit startled.

He shrugged his shoulders. "I can't leave until my uncle says it's done."

Both of you fell into an uneasy silence until he finally broke it. "I knew from the beginning it wouldn't work. In your eyes, there's only one person."

You scoffed. "It's obvious."

"But I kept my hopes up. If you need me, I'll be wherever you need me," Cassian said softly.

You shook your head, unsure of how to react to his vulnerability. "What exactly made you agree to this, even though you knew from the start it wouldn't work?" you asked, searching his eyes for answers.

"My uncle," he admitted, going quiet before forcing a smile. "You know my situation."

Right. You knew his story. Even though he held a duke title, his uncle, who was the illegitimate son, was the richest in his country. Both of you shared the same fate. The puppet master of your life was your father, and for Cassian, it was his step-uncle.

"If it doesn't work out with you, my uncle will find another princess from another country," Cassian said, resignation in his voice.

You stopped walking, a sense of hopelessness washing over you. "Will we ever get out of this?"

"If my uncle dies," Cassian answered without hesitation. "Can't you see we already share the same suffering? There's a connection between us."

Before you could respond, Bucky appeared between you and Cassian, his presence imposing. "Cassian," Bucky said, his voice steady but cold. "It's time for you to leave."

Cassian nodded, sensing the tension. "Of course. I'll see you later," he said to you, then turned and walked away.

Once Cassian was gone, you turned to Bucky, concern etched on your face. "What did my father say to you?"

Bucky's jaw tightened. "Nothing I can't handle," he replied, trying to sound reassuring but failing to hide the strain in his voice.

You reached out, touching his arm. "You can tell me, Bucky. We're in this together."

He took a deep breath, looking into your eyes. "He just reminded me of my place, that's all."

Your doubts grew stronger with every word. "I don't want this to be a marriage of fear and obligation," you whispered, your voice trembling.

Bucky took your hand, squeezing it gently. "I love you, and I'll do whatever it takes to protect you," he said, his voice filled with determination.

But the look in his eyes told you there was more he wasn't saying. The seeds of doubt had been planted, and you couldn't shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.

As you walked back to the palace together, the weight of the situation pressed down on you. You wanted to believe in Bucky, in your love, but the shadow of your father's tyranny loomed large, casting a dark cloud over your future.

👑👑👑👑👑

On the wedding day, Bucky stood in front of the mirror, his eyes locked on Veridian's royal army uniform. The intricate embroidery, the gleaming medals, the carefully tailored fabric seemed to shimmer with an unspoken weight. His heart pounded, a relentless drumbeat that matched the anxious tremors in his hands.

He was dressed in the very outfit that marked him as a symbol of honor and responsibility, but today, it felt like a shroud, heavy with expectation and fear.

He took a deep breath, trying to steady his racing thoughts. "This is the day we've been waiting for," he murmured to himself, his voice barely more than a whisper. The words were meant to be reassuring but came out hollow, a weak echo of the tumult within him.

Every inch of the uniform felt like a reminder of the stakes at hand—the promise of a new life with you, intertwined with the shadows of deception and conflict that loomed large.

As he adjusted the gold-braided epaulets on his shoulders, something caught his eye. A single envelope lay on the table beside him, its presence an anomaly in the otherwise pristine room. Bucky picked it up, his fingers trembling slightly.

The envelope was plain, but the ominous red strokes that marked it were anything but ordinary. They looked like fresh blood, the stark color vivid against the cream of the envelope.

With a sense of foreboding, Bucky slid his finger under the flap and pulled out a single sheet of paper. The words written on it were clear, but it felt like a dagger to his heart. “TRAITOR.”

The word seemed to pulse with a menacing energy, the red strokes bleeding through the paper as if tainted with a sinister intent. The simple, accusatory message sent a shiver down his spine. His mind raced, trying to piece together the implications. Who had sent this? How did they know? And most importantly, what did it mean for the ceremony about to take place?

His breath hitched as he looked at his reflection, realizing that today was not just a union but a stage for something much darker.

The uniform that had once symbolized his hopes now felt like a prison. The looming threat of betrayal overshadowed the day that was meant to be filled with joy and celebration.

With a clenched jaw and a resolve hardened by the weight of the message, Bucky tucked the letter back into the envelope and straightened his posture.

He knew that whatever lay ahead, he needed to face it head-on. Today was the culmination of years of waiting and planning, but it was also the beginning of a new chapter fraught with danger and uncertainty.

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Author Note: Hey friends,

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[tizeline]

Giggling at the fact that Donnie probably has a lot of only child habits like only getting food for himself and eating it Infront of them and getting genuinely annoyed if they try to steal some. Astonished when they borrow anything of his without permission (WHO MOVED MY PENS?!). Being genuinely perplexed when one of his chores gets done randomly 😭

Poor Donnie isn't in on any of the inside jokes probably 😔

LMAO yeah I've been thinking about Only Child Donnie a lot XD

For example, Donnie having no idea how to differentiate between normal sibling bickering and genuine fights. After Raph starts hanging out with Donnie and Leo, he'll get to see way more of that classic sibling bickering in action. And considering Leo's tension with the rest of his family during this time because of the whole Dark Armor incident, he'd worry that Leo and Raph still feel some actual resentment towards each other. Leo and Raph are arguing with each other to the point they start play-wrestling and Donnie is all like "shit shit what do I do they're gonna hurt each other" and the next second Leo and Raph are laughing at random some joke and Donnie is just left confused over the whole interaction because what even was that?? Weren't they mad at each other just a second ago??

I will say though, me and my sibling weren't the type to just share each others stuff freely. Well, we did when we were young, most of our toys we both played with. But maybe because of that we got a bit possessive over our own stuff as we got older (we also shared a room until I was like 10-ish, so we were probably both a bit desparate to become separate induviduals at that point). Point is, if my bastard of a sibling even DARED to step foot into my sacred abode (my room) without my express permission, they would be forced to face my unbridled fury (I'd gently beat them up with pillows)! And if they were to steal as much as a single pencil from my treasury, my wrath would lead me to even more drastic measures (I'd snitch to our parents)!

That being said, I have no idea how The Drax Bros behaved regarding this when growing up. IF they were the type to just yoink each others stuff constantly (which I definitely think is possible) you are completely right that it would drive Donnie up the wall if they did the same to him XD

In my experience and from what I've observed with others, when you have siblings close in age to you, you tend to develop a very intense obsession with everything always needing to be 100% fair and equal. For example, if you're cutting up cake and your siblings piece is as much of a millimeter wider than your own piece, it's basically the end of the world. I can see Leo and Donnie sharing a pizza and afterwards Leo's all outraged over Donnie getting more pizza than him. Donnie's confused cuz they each got an equal amount of slices, but then Leo accuses Donnie of getting all the SLIGHTLY bigger slices and as such got a LITTLE bit more pizza than Leo! Completely unfair!

Actually, Donnie being a math nerd would be good at measuring food in this scenario, his brothers would constantly try to get him to divide any food they're sharing to make sure it's as even and equal as possible. Donnie quickly gets tired of this, but the alternative is the other turtles all arguing with each other over who gets which piece which is even more annoying so he just goes along with it lol.

And oh yeah, Donnie definitely feels quite left out whenever his brothers joke about or even mentions something they did growing up that he did not get to partake in (little does he know that his brothers feels similarly whenever he and April do the same thing and references stuff from their shared childhood that they did not get to be part of)

[come-on-eat-your-own-pants]

Headcanon to make the timeline work:

The kid Caryn is holding isn't Shermie Pines, it's his son

Okay so think about it. Alex himself has said that though this baby was somewhat intended to be Shermie, it would make no sense time-wise as both he and his son would have to be fifteen or sixteen when they would become a father to get Dipper and Mabel to be the correct age.

Consider. For this theory Shermie is a few years older than Stan and Ford, which would make him about twenty to twenty-two years old when Stan gets kicked to the curb. College age. So let's say he got a little wild in college (or wherever else he is -- perhaps working his first job?) and gets some poor girl knocked up. Of course this is the seventies -- birth control and abortion are a thing, but they aren't as safe, successful and easily accessible as they are now -- so they end up keeping the baby. And Caryn, like any grandmother (source: my mother, who puts up a fight if she gets my brother's kids less than one day/night a week), occasionally looks after the kid so her son can focus on his education (or job). The kid grows up and is about thirty when Dipper and Mabel are born, which is not a very strange age to become a father in the 90s.

I mean, I suppose Shermie could be even older, meaning Caryn would be looking after the kid purely out of grandmotherly love or convenience and not necessarily to give her young parent of a son a break, but it makes more sense to me to have him be college age when he becomes a dad, for mostly one reason: Filbrick. Filbrick Pines explicitly calls Ford their "ticket out of here," which to me reads as Ford being the only son he's really actually proud of, or at least the only son he sees as being actually useful. Perhaps Shermie wasn't as much of a screw-up as Stan, but he also isn't someone Filbrick flaunts. Knocking up a girl would fit that, especially if he had to drop out of college because of it, or something like that.

An argument against this theory could be the absence of Shermie in Stan and Ford's childhood. But honestly: my oldest brother (five years older than me) wasn't that present in my childhood as well. I mean, sure, we did a lot of things together and in a way we were quite close, but we hardly ever played together other than things we did as a family, and he moved out before I even got my first period. This would actually work even better with Shermie being more than a few years older than the Stan twins, because the bigger the age gap, the less interaction there would be.

And of course Stan and Ford are twins, so it would make sense for most of their memories to be of the two of them together. They wouldn't need their older brother so much if they had each other.

Then there is the principal of their high school mentioning to Filbrick and Caryn that they have two sons, which I've seen as an argument for saying that Shermie wasn't born yet at the time (which wouldn't work in any way really because the West Coast Tech admissions team visits the next day, at the end of which this shot of Caryn with the baby is taken, and neither looks like there's been a birth in between the talk with the principal and Stanley getting kicked out). Far more likely to me is that the principal simply didn't know or care about the Stan twins' exact home situation. I mean, it's high school, how relevant is the exact amount of children in a household to a principal? He only has to deal with two, so he only mentions two.

Like, yeah, I know this theory isn't perfect, but the timeline also doesn't really make sense with having the baby be Shermie. I suddenly got this idea, and it works for me, so yeah

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Synopsis: Tabito Karasu has been in love with you for almost as long as he can remember. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like you have any intentions of reciprocating, considering you’ve only ever seen him as a child — and, more importantly, as your best friend’s little brother.

BLLK Masterlist | Part One | Otoya Version

Pairing: Karasu x Reader

Total Word Count: 41.6k

Content Warnings: reader is older than karasu (by like two years so it’s nbd but it exists), no blue lock au, bratty baby karasu, jealous karasu, slow burn, childhood friends, i have no idea how to write kids just deal w it, karasu’s older sister is given a name (look at that word count LMAO i’m not calling her ‘karasu’s older sister’ the entire time), reader gets drunk at one point, karasu the goat of pining, yukimiya and otoya mentions ⁉️

A/N: yes this is inspired by the song “best friend’s brother” from victorious but has barely anything to do with it. yes this is probably the longest karasu fic you will ever read as of its publishing date (word count is not a typo it fr is that long). yes reader and karasu are fuck ass little kids for half of the fic. i have nothing to say for myself except that i love karasu so much and i cannot be stopped…also tumblr is an opp so i had to split this into two parts EEK i’m sorry!!

Tokyo was exactly as you remembered it. Both of your parents had been raised there, and so you had visited frequently when you were younger. You had fond memories of staying there with both sets of your grandparents before they had all, in turn, decided to move to calmer parts of the country, places which were not as frenetic and vibrant as the capital. After they had left, your family had had little reason to go back, so it had been some years since you had last made the trip, but in a way this move was just another kind of homecoming, for the chaos of the massive city was as familiar to you as the peace of your neighborhood.

“Everyone here talks like your parents,” Yayoi told you, the first day you both were able to meet up after you had moved. Your classes had not yet begun, but you were both finally unpacked and oriented in your new lives, so you had taken advantage of the last bits of free time you might have for a while to see one another. “It’s kind of funny.”

“Right?” you said. You had never fully adopted the accent of your home region, for you had been raised by a family which still spoke as if they were in Tokyo, but regardless it was strange to hear people other than your parents speaking in that way without affectation.

“Sometimes I end up saying the wrong thing and confusing people, but they figure out pretty quickly that it’s just the dialect I speak with, and then they ask for clarification if needed,” she said. “So I haven’t run into any major miscommunication problems yet, thankfully.”

“That’s good,” you said. “Are you excited to start classes?”

“Well, excited isn't exactly the word I’d use for it,” she said wryly. “Even if I’m the one who chose the subject, it’s still going to be a lot of work.”

“A ton of it,” you said, making a face. “You’re lucky, though. Your term doesn’t start for another week.”

“Well, it also ends a week later, so that doesn’t mean anything,” she said, sipping on the last few drops of her coffee — which she always ordered black, not because she liked it that way but because she was trying to keep up appearances and whatnot. “What about you?”

“I think classes and all will be a good distraction. It’ll be nice to have something to keep myself busy,” you said.

“What do you need to be distracted from?” she said.

“Just homesickness and stuff. The typical things you’d expect,” you said. She hummed sympathetically.

“I get it,” she said. “I miss my parents like crazy sometimes, especially when I need help with random stuff. The other day, I had to video call my mother so she could explain how to clean a cast iron pan.”

“You could’ve looked that up,” you said.

“Yeah, but it was nicer to hear it from her,” she said.

“Yeah,” you echoed, because it was the same for you. You often found yourself calling your parents for no reason at all, asking them stupid questions just to listen to them talk. “I’m glad to be on my own, but I do miss my mother and father a lot.”

“Anyone else?” she said.

“What do you mean?” you said.

“Just wondering,” she said. “You know, come to think of it, you were kind of late coming to your seat. Freaked your parents out beyond belief. Any reason in particular?”

“I was just talking to Tabito,” you said. “Saying bye and all.”

“Are you going to miss him?” she prodded.

“Obviously. At this point, he’s like my brother, too. Isn’t it natural to miss your siblings?” you said.

“I don’t,” she said, though she immediately burst into laughter, which somewhat contradicted the statement.

“You’re horrible,” you said. “I know you do.”

“I do,” she affirmed. “But I think it’s in a different way than you do. It’s odd, because I’m the one who’s actually related to him, but the truth is that you two have always been closer than he and I ever were.”

“Probably because I’m not a jerk like you are,” you said.

“How can you consider yourself his additional older sister when you’re so nice to him? You need to bully him a bit more to earn that distinction,” she said.

“He hears enough of it out of you,” you said.

“Cheers, I’ll drink to that,” she said, holding up her paper cup and raising it to her lips, though you knew it was empty by now. You clinked your own against hers and finished the last remnants of your drink in one gulp. “You know, Y/N, I think you’re irreplaceable at this point.”

“You, too,” you said. “I’ll never be friends with anyone the way I am with you.”

“Fuck whoever we meet in college,” she said, nodding in approval. “I’m sure they’ll be cool and all, but the two of us, we hardly even count as friends anymore. It’s like we’re something more.”

“Exactly,” you said. “I can have a million more best friends, and likely I will, but never again will I have another Yayoi Karasu.”

“And don’t you forget it,” she said.

“I wouldn’t dare,” you said. “Not for a moment.”

Your first year of college flew past in the blink of an eye. On the whole, you preferred it to high school, even though there were aspects of the past you still held dear, seeped with nostalgia as they were. You made new friends, as did Yayoi, but just like you both had predicted, none of them measured up to each other. Still, it was fun to meet people from all different regions in the country and to hear about their lives. Some of your classmates weren’t even from Japan at all, and there was another layer of fascination there, learning about the ways of other nations, the cultures and foods they were accustomed to, and teaching them about your own in exchange.

Your mid term breaks were a bit shorter than Yayoi’s, which meant you weren’t ever able to justify visiting home, but in return, you had much longer in between years, so while Yayoi was still stressing over her finals, you were already taking the train back to the station by your house, texting your parents all the while.

In your absence, your childhood room had remained untouched, the stuffed animals arranged on your bed in the exact order you preferred, the books still stacked on the shelves, your artwork and photos of you with your friends hanging on the walls where you had put them. Time felt frozen, and it was as if you had never left, as if your entire year in Tokyo had been a dream and this had always been the reality.

After eating dinner with your parents, you showered and changed into one of your father’s old shirts and a pair of sweatpants, flopping face-first onto your bed and taking a deep breath, already feeling yourself nodding off despite the fact that it wasn’t that late. Traveling always exhausted you, however, and it was all you could do to turn your lights off and crawl under the covers, plugging your phone in to charge as you drifted off.

Right when you were about to fall asleep for good, your phone’s screen blazed to life, startling you awake as it vibrated urgently. Groaning and cursing whoever was calling you, you glared at the device until you realized exactly who it was, and then your unhappiness was promptly replaced with glee as you clicked on the green answer button.

“Tabito!” you said. Although you had texted with him every now and then, you were ashamed to admit that you hadn’t spoken to him as much as you should’ve. You reasoned that he had had equal opportunity to reach out first and hadn’t, so it wasn’t that big of a deal, but it was a feeble excuse that was only meant to deflect the blame from yourself and nothing more.

“Y/N,” he said. His voice was deeper than you remembered, and more resonant, too, lilting with a husky, full-bodied musicality that hadn’t been there when you had left. “Hope I’m not bothering you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you reassured him. “What’s up?”

“Do you remember — sorry, this is really stupid, so don’t feel bad for saying no,” he said.

“It’s okay. I’ve definitely seen you do way stupider things,” you said. He chuckled.

“You’re probably right. Here goes, then. Um, do you remember when you went to my first soccer game in middle school, and afterwards, we agreed you wouldn’t come to another until I was the captain of a really good high school team?” he said.

“I think so, why?” you said. A second later, it hit you, and you gasped, beaming so widely that your face ached. “No way! For Bambi Osaka? Since when?”

“Yup, for Bambi Osaka. The old captain just graduated, and he named me as his replacement today, so, uh, since today, I guess,” he said.

“I wish you would’ve told me in person so you could see how much I’m smiling right now,” you said. “Congratulations, Tabito! You can’t begin to know how proud I am of you.”

“Thanks,” he said. “Anyways, our first game is this Thursday, so…”

“Huh? Did you want me to come?” you said. “Yayoi won’t be back from Tokyo by then, though. Shouldn’t I wait for her?”

“If you’d prefer that,” he said. “Or, I mean, you don’t have to go at all. I was just offering in case you were interested, but no hard feelings if not.”

Since when had he been so awkward with you? Since when had he stumbled over his words and been so unsure? You frowned at the mere chance that there was more than a physical distance between the two of you, even if it probably was the case, despite how much you had never wanted such an event to occur.

“As long as you want me, I’ll be there. I don’t have much else to do anyways, right? And how could I miss your first game as captain? Let me know where and when, and I’ll definitely come,” you said. He exhaled softly.

“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, I want you there. I’ll let you know the details, but like I said, no pressure. Don’t force yourself. Come if you can.”

It was springtime, and the world was still remembering how to come alive, peeking out its head from the den of winter and blinking its sleepy eyes against the sun. There were not any flowers in bloom quite yet, but as far as the eye could see were buds on the precipice of rupturing, the pale undersides of their petals mere imitations of the hues they’d soon display proudly. The birds still warmed eggs in nests made of twigs and twine, but already there were cracks in a few of the creamy shells; here and there, even, little yellow beaks could be seen reaching towards the sky and chittering incessant demands at their parents.

You were lazy as you pedaled your bike down the side streets leading towards the field where the match was being held. It was an away game, technically, but this worked out better for you, as the high school they were playing at was closer to your house than the Bambi Osaka stadium, which was far enough that you would’ve needed to take a taxi.

According to Tabito, the game was actually more of a scrimmage, as they were playing a local school’s soccer club instead of another organization’s youth team, as they did in serious matches. Apparently, this was by design, as it gave their coach the opportunity to test Tabito's skills at being a captain in a low-stakes, low-pressure environment. If he proved himself incapable, the coach would override the previous captain’s pick and name another member of the team to the position, but if he played as well as he always did, and managed to coordinate the rest of the players in a satisfactory manner, then he’d be given the position permanently.

You had reminded him that this meant he technically wasn’t the captain yet, but to this he had said that he had the title and the armband, and if anything, since that was the situation, he needed you there more than ever. After all, he had explained, you had been in the audience when he had scored the winning goal in his first game for his middle school’s team. You were good luck for him. If you were in the crowd, then there was no way he could lose.

Parking your bike in the lot alongside the others, you locked it and then made your way towards the entrance to the stadium, the ticket Tabito had sent you in between your index and middle fingers. Even though there wouldn’t be very many people attending this game, it was Bambi Osaka’s policy to require tickets for entry to any of their matches, and the price if you weren’t associated with a player was, you heard, quite hefty.

You sat by yourself in the stands, your purse beside you and your legs crossed at the ankles. You couldn’t explain why, but there was a doubt in the back of your mind about whether you even belonged in the audience at all. Without Yayoi at your side, it felt like there was a neon sign in the air pointing at you and declaring you inept and unwelcome. Everyone else was buzzing with theories and predictions for the upcoming game, tossing out the names of the players and their opinions on them, but you were by yourself, without even a drink to warm your hands.

The gray of that isolation evaporated the moment that the Bambi Osaka boys took to the field, led by none other than Tabito. You were suddenly reminded that you weren’t just allowed to be there — you were wanted, genuinely wanted, and so you had as much if not more of a claim to your seat than anyone else could. Tabito had invited you. He could’ve invited anyone else in the entire city, but still he had invited you, and you would not tarnish that by thinking you were alone when he was there, as he always was.

As was to be expected, there was a complete difference to the way Tabito played when compared to that very first game of his which you had watched. For one, he was at the front of the field instead of in the middle, and there was an impertinence to the way he shook the hand of the opposing captain, an audacious smirk on his face which was visible even from the distance. This was a side of Tabito you weren’t so acquainted with, a side which was brazen and self-assured and stood as if he had already won before the referee even blew the whistle to begin.

The game moved faster than you could keep up with, and without Yayoi there to give you a play-by-play, you found yourself utterly lost about the finer details of the match. Still, even you could tell that Bambi Osaka was in the lead, and by no small margin — largely in part thanks to the combined skills of Tabito and a slender, pale-haired boy whose jersey read Hiori.

When Tabito was younger, there had been a desperate, vicious quality to his soccer, as if he really might die should he lose. It was in direct contrast to now, where he toyed with the opposite team in much the same way a cat would toy with a ball of yarn — with a distinct sense of superiority, like he was looking down on them even as he forced his way past, not giving them any other choice but to watch as he drove his way down the field.

“Is number 10 the new captain?” a boy behind you said. He sounded younger; maybe he had an older brother on one of the teams, or maybe he was just that supportive of Bambi Osaka. You didn’t turn, but you did tune into the conversation, wondering what they’d say about Tabito.

“Karasu? Yes, he is,” a slightly older boy said. “My brother said he’s a real asshole, but he’s a great guy when it counts. They’re all happy he’s the one who was recommended for the spot.”

“He’s so good,” the younger boy said. “And Hiori, as well. They’re both amazing.”

“Hiori’s only a first year, too. I bet he’s going to go far,” the older boy said. “Now shush, quit distracting me. I’m trying to watch the game.”

To no one’s surprise, Bambi Osaka won by a ridiculous amount of goals, and as Tabito shook hands with the school’s captain again, you noticed their coach nodding in approval, annotating something on his clipboard with a satisfied smile on his face. You waited until all of them had vanished into the locker rooms to head to the exit and wait by your bike for Tabito to join you.

About twenty minutes later, he and the rest of the team trickled out, discussing their game and the plans for the next one. At first it seemed like he had not noticed you, absorbed in conversation as he was, but it quickly became evident that he had, for he skillfully guided the others towards where you stood, never faltering in words nor steps until he reached you. Then he paused, schooling his expression into one of shock, his eyebrows raising and his lips parting as if he had happened upon you entirely by accident. It was an amusing bit of theatrics, albeit realistic to anyone who did not know his mannerisms as well as you did.

“Hey, Y/N,” he said, all composed and airy and dispassionate, as if it were mere coincidence that the two of you had met at that moment, as if it hardly mattered to him that you were there. It might’ve fooled another person, but not once in his life had he been able to fool you, and he certainly wouldn’t start today.

He must’ve showered in the locker rooms, for his hair fell loose and silky around his face instead of styled back as it typically was, and when you hugged him — which was met a reflexive return of his arms around your body before he could even manage to yelp in surprise — you could smell the faint, pleasant scent of his soap which still clung to his skin.

“Hi,” you said, holding onto him for as long as you deemed publicly appropriate before wriggling free and smiling at him. “I think you did good. Without Yayoi, I couldn’t be sure, but to me you looked great.”

“Eh,” he said. “Could’ve been worse. Could’ve been better. But thanks.”

“Woah, Karasu,” one of his teammates said. He was a tall and burly player who reminded you vaguely of Aoyama, and he accompanied the exclamation by wrapping one arm around Tabito in a friendly headlock and using his free hand to ruffle the boy’s damp hair, leaving him to resemble a sea urchin. “You didn’t tell us you had such a beautiful girlfriend! Hello, ma’am, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Get off of me,” Tabito wheezed, slapping his teammate away. “You fuckface, I’m going to kill you. Don’t try to shake her hand!”

“I’m not his girlfriend,” you said, accepting his teammate’s proffered hand. “Just best friends with his older sister. You can think of me as a stand-in for her while she’s finishing up her first year in Tokyo. My name’s Y/N, by the way.”

“Ah, you’re that Y/N!” he said.

“I believe I am? What does that mean?” you said.

“Nothing bad,” Tabito cut in. “Yayoi’s come to a few games and mentioned you, so everyone’s been wanting to meet you.”

“It’s true. I mean, a girl who refused to come to a game until and unless Karasu was made captain? We all thought you must be something intense,” his teammate said. “You seem pretty normal, though. And also super hot, if you don’t mind me mentioning.”

“Well, he’s the one who told me not to come, so if anyone’s intense, it’s him,” you said. “And, uh, thanks? I guess?”

“I mind you mentioning, so shut the hell up,” Tabito said, finally breaking free of his teammate’s hold and shoving him away from you. “Sorry about this one, Y/N. He’s incorrigible.”

His teammate laughed raucously. “My fault, my fault. Sorry, Karasu.”

“Say sorry to her,” Tabito said. “She’s the one you were bothering.”

“It’s alright,” you assured him. “Really, I don’t mind the compliment. Even if it could’ve been phrased better.”

“Anything for you, gorgeous lady,” his teammate said with a wink. “But, ah, considering I value my life and limbs, I think I’m going to head out now, as our new captain seems about a few seconds away from murdering me. See you around!”

He ran away to rejoin the rest of the Bambi Osaka boys as they all headed in their separate directions towards their homes, leaving you and Tabito alone once more. As soon as they were all gone, he sighed, that put-upon countenance he had maintained for the entirety of the conversation falling apart in an instant.

“I didn’t think he’d say all of that,” he said. “Sorry again.”

“You worry so much,” you said. “Come on, you just won another match, didn’t you? That’s cause to celebrate, so don’t look so tired and mopey.”

“I don’t look tired and mopey!” he defended. “This is just how my face is!”

“Uh-huh, sure,” you said, unlocking your bike and beginning to walk it beside you so you could keep talking to him. “I seem to remember your face being quite a bit rounder and sunnier. Now you’re all angles and doom and gloom.”

“That’s not something I can help,” he said, taking your bike from you so he could walk it instead. “Y/N, you’re being mean. I haven’t seen you in so long and now you’re acting like Yayoi.”

“You think I’m acting like Yayoi? I’m hurt,” you said. “Okay, then, you sensitive captain. How about we go get ice cream? My treat, since you got the position and all.”

“Okay,” he said. “But it’ll be my treat, not yours, because you came to my game and stayed the whole time. It was your good luck that helped me in the end.”

“Offering to pay for me? I suppose I shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, so I’ll allow it this time. Anyways, I would’ve had to, because I just realized I left my wallet at home,” you said.

“Almost like you did that on purpose,” he mused, bumping your shoulder with his. “Was that your plan all along? Suggesting we get ice cream but forgetting to bring any money, so I had to cover for us both?”

“I see why your team members think you’re an asshole,” you said. “It’s a surprise, to be sure, but then again, maybe I should’ve seen it coming.”

“Who’s calling me an asshole?” he said. “How did you know that? I’m not! Whoever it is, they were making things up, because I’m — I’m super nice! Seriously, where did you hear that? Stop giggling and answer me!”

You extended your arm to run your fingers through his mussed up hair, smoothing it down as best as you could. “A magician never tells her secrets. Don’t worry about it and just tell me which flavor you’re getting.”

“The same as always, why?” he said.

“I want to decide whether I should steal some of it or not,” you said.

“You don’t have to steal it. I’ll share if you want some,” he said.

“It’s better if I’m doing something wrong. I think it adds to the flavor, or enhances it, or something,” you said. He considered this before nodding with the utmost of gravity.

“If that’s how it is, then you’re absolutely not allowed to even look at my ice cream. I’ll be, uh, super mad if you do,” he said, his glare so fearsome and dark that it skipped the realms of intimidation and landed squarely in the land of comedy.

“You’re the best,” you said.

“I do what I can,” he said. “Will you let me have some of yours?”

“Hm,” you said. “Fine, but only because I love you so much.”

He fought back a smile at that, staring directly ahead, the tendons of his hands flexing on the handlebars of your bike as you continued to walk along the empty sidewalk, the glowing sun in the distance a reminder of the many days exactly like this which you still had left to spend.

The break flew by so quickly it was almost more of a punishment than anything. About as soon as you had gotten settled back into a rhythm of spending your days with the Karasus and your evenings with your parents, it was time for you and Yayoi to return to Tokyo for your second year of college, as well as for Tabito to enter his final year of high school.

You took for granted that you would be back as soon as the first term ended, so when you boarded the train to Tokyo, you didn’t take the time to properly appreciate the place where you had grown up. The city where you had whiled away your idyllic childhood…you had considered it a guarantee that you’d return soon, so why would you linger? But a couple of weeks into your first term, you got news from your parents: your father’s job had, almost out of the blue, transferred him, and so they would be moving to nearby Kawasaki by the end of the month.

There was definitely a pro to having your parents at that distance — they were close enough that you could visit them whenever you wanted to, but far enough that you could justify not going if you were so inclined, and removed enough that your life still belonged to you and only you. Still, it was a little like having a rug pulled out from under you when you weren’t even aware you were standing on a rug in the first place; especially because you could not so much as help in the moving process, given that you were stuck at school and could make no excuse to go back home for such a long time.

The house they found in Kawasaki was in a good area, and though it was smaller than your old one, it was still airy and bright, with large windows and wooden floors and enough bedrooms that you could still have your own despite not living there full-time anymore. Your parents were actually glad for the reduced size, for it meant less emptiness, less cleaning to be done in places that never even got used or looked at.

When you went to visit during the first term break, it seemed like they really were happy there. Or perhaps they were just trying to convince you that this was for the best, that you should not be sad, but if that was so, then they shouldn’t have bothered. You were the one who had left first, who had gone to Tokyo to study and work. Of course it was more abrupt and final than you had wanted, but hadn’t this day always been looming on the horizon? Eventually, you would’ve stopped visiting so frequently, if at all. There was no reason to mourn the occurrence of an inevitability.

Besides the drama of your parents’ move, your second year was uneventful. You made even more friends than you had in your first year, and you still saw Yayoi as much as you could, although it was more difficult for the time being. Luckily, at this point you two had the kind of friendship wherein you picked up as if you had never been apart whenever you reunited, so you at least had that one constant in what sometimes felt like an ever-shifting life.

Around the time that your finals began, you received a text from Tabito, written in a formal language that was nothing like the messages full of abbreviations and emoticons that he generally sent you.

‘Hi, Y/N. I hope you’re doing well, and that your second year in university didn’t give you too much difficulty. I’m just reaching out to let you know that my graduation is next Friday. The ceremony starts at 6:30 in the evening, and I managed to reserve you a spot. The address and information is on the ticket — if you’re able to come, then I’d really appreciate it, but if not, then that’s totally okay. I just thought I should let you know.’

You stared at your phone, a sinking feeling in your stomach. No matter how much you wanted to go, you couldn’t. There were too many factors against it, and you felt horrible as you typed out your response. Any way you went about it came across as too harsh, but then again, was there even a gentle way to reject someone when they had come to you with something so important?

‘tabito!! i can’t believe you’re graduating already, wow!! i really would like to come, but i have a final that friday in the afternoon :( plus i don’t know if you heard or not but my family moved to kawasaki, so i wouldn’t really have anywhere to stay. thank you so much for inviting me though!! i’ll get yayoi to bring a cardboard cutout of me to put in my seat or something LOL. it’ll be just like the real thing!!!’

He responded almost immediately, and despite the effort he must’ve made to sound unaffected, he was obviously disappointed by the turn of events, his efforts at cheer only further highlighting that fact.

‘It’s okay, really! And thank you. Haha yes a Y/N cutout will have to be good enough then. Good luck on your final!’

The rest of the week, the unopened file from Tabito, which sat in your email inbox, tantalized you, and you found yourself obsessively checking the schedule of trains leaving Tokyo. There was one back to your hometown that would depart an hour after your exam was scheduled to end, and you refreshed it constantly, waiting to see if tickets would sell out. Once they were gone, it would give you an excuse not to buy them, but to your frustration, they never did.

You would have to run, and even then it wasn’t a guarantee you would make it, to the train or the graduation, but it was the best chance you had, and with every passing moment, it began to sound like more and more of a viable option.

On Thursday evening, when you once again checked the ticket site and noticed there were open seats, you bit your tongue to stop yourself from swearing, and then you entered your credit card information into the prompt. A minute later, you got a confirmation email, letting you know that your seat was booked for the next day. Burying your face in your hands, you inhaled deeply, vowing not to tell Tabito in case he got his hopes up for nothing. Breathing in and out through your nose once more, you straightened your back and opened up your textbook, returning to studying with a renewed vigor borne of the adrenaline rush which resulted from the impulsive decision.

If your professor found it odd that you came to the exam hall in formal clothes, with your hair done and an overnight bag over your shoulder, she did not say anything, only motioning for you to put your bag with the others and then handing you your paper.

Thankfully, you had studied through the year, and this exam was for one of your easier subjects, so it was a relative breeze. You finished with time to spare, leaving the hall with your things and walking to the train station without any worries except for what would happen once you reached your end destination.

The train ride was longer than you remembered, and by the time you were disembarking at the station closest to Tabito’s high school, it was already 6:00. You sprinted through the platform, calling out apologies as you ran into people or elbowed them out of the way, trying to get to the taxi area before anyone else could claim all of the available vehicles.

“Stop!” you shouted when the singular remaining taxi prepared to drive off to a different pick-up location. You must’ve looked a sight, chasing after a taxi by the train station, wearing a dress and heels, stumbling over your feet with your arm outstretched. “Hey, sir! Stop!”

By some miracle, he saw you through the rearview mirror and screeched to a halt. You opened the back door and dove in, scribbling down the address on a slip of paper and handing it to him, as was customary. Then, when he input the address into his GPS and accelerated onto the route, you leaned forward.

“Sir, I’ll tip you generously if you can get me there before 6:30,” you said.

“I will do my best, ma’am. Please hold on,” he said. That was all the warning you got before he stepped on the gas pedal, the car taking off at all but twice the speed of the surrounding traffic, leaving you to hold onto your seat as the scenery outside blurred into nothing but a smear of pinks and greens and browns.

He got you there at 6:27, which was too close for comfort but still earlier than should’ve been humanly possible, so you reached into your wallet and pulled out a wad of cash that was certainly more than you owed. Slapping it on the console, you mumbled out a thank you and ran off without waiting for a response, trying your best to remember the directions to the auditorium from the email Tabito had sent you.

“Do you have a ticket, miss?” the security guard waiting at the door to the auditorium said. You reached into your pocket and tried to unlock your phone; your slick fingers typed in the wrong password twice before it finally opened and you could brandish the file. He squinted at it before nodding and opening the door for you. “The ceremony has already begun, so please try not to make too much of a disturbance when you enter.”

Your shins and the balls of your feet ached from how much ground you had covered in your less-than-supportive footwear and the speed at which you had done so. Your shoulder, too, was sore under the strain of your bag, but you ignored these pains, counting down the rows and the seat numbers until you spotted the empty one that belonged to you. Squeezing past the others who had already taken their places, you collapsed in the cushioned chair, a sigh of relief escaping you when you saw that, though the ceremony was already underway, Tabito was still yet to go.

“Oh, hey, Y/N,” Yayoi said absentmindedly, for your seat was naturally beside hers. Then, like she had realized what she had said, her jaw dropped. “Y/N? I thought you couldn’t come!”

“Shh, he’s about to go,” you said. “I’ll explain later.”

If you had hesitated for even a minute at any point, you would’ve missed it, but by the grace of some universal power, you had made it into your seat right as Tabito stepped up to take his diploma. He scanned the crowd, much in the same way he did when he was playing soccer, but sadly instead of sharply, like he was aware that he was about to be disappointed yet knew he had to experience that disappointment first-hand regardless.

His eyes slid over everyone in the audience dismissively, but when they landed upon you, they paused, and though it was too far for you to see, you fancied they must’ve widened the slightest bit. Not enough for anyone else to make anything of it, but enough for you to know.

For an instant, everyone else disappeared. In that auditorium, there was only Tabito on the stage and you in the audience, his diploma slack in his grasp, your breaths still fast and uneven. And although there was a distance, and no small one at that, between you and him, it was as if you were right by his side, as if you could see every single emotion which flickered across his face. Shock. Disbelief. Wonder. Then, finally, a sheer, childish thing which could only be called joy — unabashed and whole and candid joy. He smiled in the way he only did for you, not for anyone else in the entire world, not smug and haughty but shy and sincere, and you could not help but smile as well, raising your hand and waving at him like he always did at you.

He was taken aback, but obviously delighted, and so, as the principal announced his name and read off his accomplishments while with the school, Tabito ignored the praise and the applause, focusing solely on returning your wave with one of his own.

“What are you doing here?” he said, sweeping you into a hug as soon as you had all left the auditorium and he had reunited with his family. “You said you couldn’t come!”

“I was wondering the same thing,” Yayoi said from where she was waiting at your side. “And Tabito, when you’re done showing your clearfavoritism, give me a high-five or something.”

He held onto you for a moment longer before letting go and high-fiving his sister, who was the only one that hadn’t been there for when Mr. and Mrs. Karasu, as well as Tabito and Yayoi’s grandmother, had taken teary eyed photos with him. She had instead stayed with you, telling you that you owed her an explanation and then jumping to another topic of conversation before you could give her one.

“There was a train from Tokyo which left an hour after my exam window ended,” you said. “I know you don’t like surprises, but I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to make it, so I didn’t want to tell you in advance in case things didn’t work out. As it is, I had to bribe the taxi driver to get me here from the station at highly illegal speeds, and with that, I only made it to the front of the building by 6:27. Honestly, I still can’t believe I got there before you went at all, but I’m so glad I did.”

“Me, too. You’re right that I don’t normally like surprises, but this one, I was really happy about, so it’s an exception,” Tabito said. Now that he was no longer under obligation to hang around with Yayoi, he was back at your side, playing with the zipper of your bag in fascination while you spoke.

“Me, three,” Yayoi said. “He was seriously depressed that you weren’t coming. The house was like a toxic wasteland the entire week. It’s going to be much safer and cleaner now.”

“Toxic wasteland?” you said.

“Yup, and the toxic waste himself is right next to you, so be careful,” she said.

“You’re so dramatic. It wasn’t like that,” Tabito said.

“Sure,” she said. “Yup. Totally wasn’t.”

“Why do you always do this?” he whined.

“Do what?” Yayoi said.

“Try to embarrass me whenever you can!” he said.

“Not like it’s possible for me to embarrass you in front of Y/N out of everyone. You do that all on your own, so there’s no way I can make things worse,” she said.

“Yayoi!” he snapped.

“Onto more pressing subjects,” you interjected before things could worsen. “Um. I do have a slight problem.”

“What is it?” Tabito said.

“I kind of came here on a whim, so I don’t really have anywhere to sleep, exactly,” you said. The siblings exchanged looks before Yayoi rolled her eyes and Tabito grabbed your bag from you.

“You’ll stay with us, of course,” Yayoi said.

“For as long as you want,” Tabito added. “Or as long as you can, actually. That’s better. Don’t leave until you absolutely have to.”

“We can put your bags in the car, and then we have to take pictures,” Yayoi said.

“I didn’t know you cared enough to want to commemorate my graduation,” Tabito said. Yayoi snorted.

“Nah, I just want to commemorate Y/N’s wild journey from Tokyo, and the fact that she magically got here on time. I don’t ever want to forget about that,” she said.

“I’d be offended, but actually, I’m in agreement. I can’t believe you bribed a taxi driver for me,” Tabito said.

“Ah, well, you know,” you said. “I just told him I’d tip him if he could get me there on time, and he did it.”

“You’re crazy,” he said affectionately.

“Totally,” Yayoi agreed.

“And aren’t you grateful for it?” you said, curling your fingers around his wrist and throwing the other arm around Yayoi’s shoulders, causing her to shoot you a mock-dirty look before she made herself comfortable against you.

“Yes,” Tabito said, his eyelashes brushing his cheeks when he lowered them bashfully, that same smile lighting up his face at the sensation of your fingers dancing over his veins. “I really am.”

The world was quite determined not to split you and the Karasus apart for very long. You learned that night that, along with getting into a prestigious college, Tabito had also been selected to join the Japanese U-20 soccer team. In order to balance his academics — he could’ve quit school entirely by this point if he so chose, but he was far too paranoid to not have a second option should his soccer career not take off — with the new demands of the team, he would be living in Tokyo with one of his new teammates, a boy he had never met but was supposedly named something along the lines of Eita Otoya.

His new place was somewhat close to your apartment; close was a subjective word, of course, but to you, when the weather was nice and you were in no rush to be anywhere or do anything, it was a perfectly walkable distance, and you told him you’d definitely show him and Otoya around once they were moved in and had a moment to spare for such a frivolous outing.

Between his practices and the increase in his workload, it seemed like you really might never see Tabito at all, however close you might’ve now been to him physically. Yet somehow, on a warm day at the brink of summer, he texted you asking if the offer was still on the table, and if so, could you please show him and Otoya a place to get good coffee, because the stuff they made with their Keurig machine wasn’t cutting it anymore. You laughed, responding that you’d be delighted to, and that you were free all weekend, with no qualms about dedicating a day solely to them.

Your first impression of Eita Otoya was that, next to Tabito, he had a delicate and pointed appeal to his pretty features. He was smaller than Tabito, and although there wasn’t an ounce of menace in the way he stood, all inviting and open and casual, there was a wolflike canniness to his green irises, which glimmered when he noticed you approaching.

Before Otoya could even say anything, Tabito had covered his mouth with a hand, glaring down at him in a manner which did not seem to entirely be in jest.

“No way,” he said. “Flirt with whoever else you want, but she and Yayoi are off limits.”

Otoya held his hands up in the air, his voice muffled by Tabito’s palm when he spoke. “Got it, dude. Plenty of other fish in the sea, right?”

“For you, yeah,” Tabito said. “Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi, Tabito,” you said. “And you must be Otoya? It’s nice to meet you. Tabito’s mentioned you a few times.”

“Hopefully he’s only said good things,” Otoya said, shaking your hand, careful to keep a cordial distance between you two.

“On the contrary, I’ve been led to believe you’re the devil incarnate,” you said.

“Really?” Otoya said.

“No, of course not. He’s only ever spoken highly of you. I was just joking,” you said.

“That’s a relief,” Otoya said. “It’d be awkward if you had a bad impression of me before we’d even met.”

“Did you really think I’d complain about you to her? I’m kind of hurt,” Tabito said.

“Look, you never know! Maybe that’s how you get your aggression out,” Otoya said.

“It’s not. If I had any aggression, I’d just yell at you yourself. I definitely wouldn’t burden her with any of your hypothetical nonsense, not in a million years,” Tabito said.

“Woah, didn’t realize we had a gentleman here,” Otoya said with a snicker. “Okay, then. Thanks for not talking shit about me behind my back.”

“Anytime,” Tabito said.

“Are you two done yet?” you said. “I don’t want the place to close before we get a spot.”

“Is it nearby?” Otoya said. “As long as it’s close, it doesn’t even matter if it’s expensive. I just need something better than those shitty convenience store Keurig packets Tabito’s been getting for us.”

“That’s the best I’ve been able to bring home at the random times you text me telling me we’re out! Sorry I don’t stop by a damn café after every morning practice,” Tabito said.

“This guy,” Otoya said, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “Doesn’t understand the value of a good coffee one bit.”

“Not everyone has that touch,” you whispered back with a wink. “It’s alright. I won’t let you suffer any longer; the shop I’m taking you to is only a block away, and it’s relatively inexpensive — for the city, anyways. If you don’t know that it’s there, though, it’s easy to miss, so I don’t blame you for not seeing it.”

“My hero!” Otoya said. “Lead the way.”

You had discovered the small café entirely by accident during your first year in Tokyo. It was tucked away between a laundromat and a veterinary office, far from where one would expect a shop of its nature to be located, and although there was were always a couple of patrons scattered throughout the booths and tables, it was never bustling or crowded enough to take away from the cozy atmosphere.

Tabito held the door open for you, and consequently for Otoya, who followed after and inhaled deeply, clasping his hands together in awe.

“This is amazing,” he said. “L/N, you’re like an angel sent from heaven or something. I could fall to my knees and praise you with a sonnet right now, I’m that happy.”

“If you fall to your knees or do anything similarly stupid in front of her, I’ll show you why I made the U-20 team,” Tabito said, raising his leg in the air like he was threatening to kick Otoya.

“He was just joking around, Tabito, it’s not a big deal,” you said. Then, to Otoya: “You’re pretty funny, you know.”

“Thanks,” he said with a grin. “I try my best. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.”

“Mostly it doesn’t,” Tabito muttered under his breath. “Tell me your order, Y/N, and I’ll get it for you.”

“Oh, thanks!” you said, listing off your favorites from the cafe’s menu for him. He wrote it down on his phone, lines of concentration etched into his brow as he painstakingly typed out the entire order before showing it to you to confirm that it was correct.

“Can you get me their seasonal drink?” Otoya said, sliding into the seat across from you and peering up at Tabito, who was entirely unamused by the act. “That floral-type latte. It sounds sick.”

“Get it yourself,” Tabito said.

“Why? You’re going to be up there, so just order and let me get to know dear Miss L/N here,” Otoya said. Tabito seemed conflicted, but you nodded reassuringly at him.

“Fine, but you — you know the deal,” he said, brandishing his pointer finger at Otoya. “Don’t you dare mess with her.”

“You got it,” Otoya said with a double-thumbs-up.

“I’m sorry. He’s always been like that, but he really does mean well,” you said, gazing after Tabito once he had stomped away to the counter.

“Been like what?” Otoya said. “An asshole? Ah, but I’m only saying it affectionately, so please don’t tell him I called him that, or else you’ll cause problems where there aren’t any.”

“He’s sweet at heart,” you said. “I know how he can seem to other people, especially at first, but I met him when he was four years old, so I guess I never really saw that side of him. He’s never been anything but kind to me. I guess that’s all I’m trying to say.”

“You’ve known Karasu for that long?” Otoya said.

“Yup. Like I said, I’m not denying that he’s abrasive most of the time, but he’s only being so protective because he cares about his sister and I so very much. Please don’t take it personally. He’s just that type of younger sibling,” you said.

“Younger sibling?” Otoya repeated. “That’s how you see him, huh? I get it now. If that’s how things are, then I won’t butt in.”

“That’s how they are,” you said. For some reason, this caused him to laugh at you, but it was pitying and mocking and not a sound you preferred to hear from anyone — most certainly not from a person you had only just met.

“It’s always so complicated in life, huh? That’s why I never really try too hard. Problems get worse the more you think about them,” he said. It hardly counted as an explanation, but for some reason, you were sure that that was all you were going to get out of him. “Oh, shit!”

“What happened?” you said as, abruptly and without warning, he shot to his feet,

“I was supposed to work on a group presentation today,” he said, running a hand through his hair with a groan. “They just texted to confirm that we’re meeting in the library in fifteen minutes.”

“Can you make it on time?” you said. He was already typing the address of his school’s library into his GPS, and the instant it loaded, he nodded at you.

“I’ve got it, but I’m afraid I’ll have to head out right about now, or else this crazy girl in my group will kill me. Tell Karasu I’ll send him the money for my drink, and that he can enjoy it on me,” he said. “Poor guy needs it, I’m pretty sure.”

“It’ll be too sweet for him, but I’ll pass along the message, sure,” you said.

“Now, normally, this would be the part where I’d ask you for your number, but no matter how beautiful you are, I’m not willing to risk my living situation for you,” he said. “Karasu’s pretty cool, as far as roommates go. It could definitely be worse, so I’d really not like to lose him and end up with some weirdo who collects toenail clippings, just for flirting with the one girl that he declared off-limits.”

“His actual sister’s off-limits as well,” you reminded Otoya. “So that’s two.”

“He did say that, didn’t he? But you’re off-limits in a different way, and unless I want to end up like my own older sister, whose first-year roommate built a replica of the Taj Mahal from the hair she collected out of their drain, I’m going to respect that,” he said.

“That’s disgusting,” you said, too busy gagging at the mental image artwork he had just described to even question what else he was talking about. “Well, you should be off to your group project, then. I’m sure I’ll see you around, Otoya, but in case it’s not for a while, I’ll wish you luck with soccer and school now.”

“Thanks. The same to you, and I am eternally in your debt for showing me this place, so if you ever need something, let me know,” he said, scrambling hastily out of the café without bothering to push his chair back under the table.

Tabito returned a few seconds later, setting the tray of your drinks down on the table and taking his spot in the booth at your side. Handing you the cup that belonged to you, he sipped on his own and placed Otoya’s across from himself.

“Where’d Otoya go?” he said.

“He said something about working on a group project and left. Apparently, he’ll send you the money for the drink, and you’re free to do with it as you please,” you said. Tabito wrinkled his nose.

“He always gets such sweet shit. There’s no way I’m going to be able to drink that,” he said.

“That’s what I told him, but what other option is there? We can share so it isn’t wasted,” you said, taking a swig from Otoya’s flowery beverage. It wasn’t bad, and you had a little more before giving it to Tabito.

“Ugh,” he said. “Fine.”

He poked out his tongue, lapping up the tiniest droplet of coffee which lingered on the rim of the cup, and then he made a face, handing it back to you and then gulping down two mouthfuls of his own drink to wash out the taste.

“That bad?” you said.

“Tasted like shit,” he said. “I don’t know how the two of you can drink that kind of stuff regularly without gagging.”

“It’s not my favorite, but it’s not as horrible as you’re making it out to be,” you said.

“I can literally feel my arteries clogging as we speak,” he said.

“Since when did you start speaking like an old man?” you said. “What boy your age talks about his arteries clogging?”

“Firstly, I’m trying to become a professional athlete, so I have to pay careful attention to things like my health, and secondly, we’re not that far apart in age. We have to worry about the same things, like jobs and grades and clogged arteries. Concerns of that nature,” he said.

“I’m glad you feel that way, but why’d you think I was referring to people my own age when I said old man, hm?” you said, elbowing him in the ribs playfully. “For your information, I doubt any of my own classmates would care about that shit yet, either. That was a distinctly middle-aged thing of you to say.”

“That makes me older than you,” he said. “If I’m middle-aged and you’re still all youthful and whatnot, that is. How do you feel about that age gap? It’s a little racy, don’t you think?”

You gave him an incredulous look. He couldn’t even maintain his straight face for more than a second, immediately losing composure and snorting at you.

“You’re the worst,” you said.

“And you’re easy to tease,” he said. “I’m sorry, but I had to take the opportunity when it presented itself.”

“I’ll give it to you this once,” you said. “Next time, you’re not getting off so easily.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he said. “You’re all talk. I’m not scared one bit.”

“It’s not my fault you’re so adorable,” you said. “How am I supposed to stay mad when you look like you just watched a puppy die every time Yayoi yells at you?”

He scowled at you. “You’re making that up, aren’t you? Or is that how you actually see me?”

“Hm,” you said. “Let’s finish our drinks. They don’t taste as good if they’ve sat for too long.”

Huffing in exasperation but knowing that you’d not go into more detail once you’d changed the subject, he finished off what was left of his order in one fell swoop, and then he snatched Otoya’s drink from your hands, tossing it into the trashcan before you could so much as blink.

“Aw,” you said. “I feel bad. That’s how we’re responding to Otoya’s act of goodwill?”

“Forget about his goodwill,” Tabito said. “It’s not like he did it because of how magnanimous he is or anything. He’s just a dumbass who forgot that he had prior commitments.”

“Nothing like you, of course,” you said. “You’re always on time, and you only ever order the best of drinks.”

“Exactly,” he said firmly, leaving no room for argument — not that you would’ve argued with him, even if there was any cause to. Your father had always told you that generally, it was better to lose an argument than a loved one, and since the notion of losing Tabito was akin to a spear being driven into your heart, you did your best to avoid the chance of that frightful outcome ever occurring at all.

A few days before the end of the winter term, Yayoi called you in a flurrying panic. When you picked up, you were expecting her to be asking about the plans you had made for the road trip you two were taking, but it was nothing of the sort. Indeed, the first words out of her mouth were ones you had never once heard from her, and you almost dropped your phone the moment she said them.

“Y/N, I need your help. There’s this guy—”

“What?” you said. “Since when? What’s his name? Where did you meet him, and how? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Is he handsome?”

“Oh my god, one question at a time!” she said. “Yes, he’s super handsome — actually, he’s a model, so it’s kind of a prerequisite. I’m telling you as it happens, so don’t think I’m keeping things from you! His name is Kenyu Yukimiya; he plays for the U-20 team with Tabito, and I met him when I went to one of their practices because I was bored. We spoke once, but I don’t think he remembers I exist, and even if he does, he probably considers me as nothing more than his teammate’s older sister.”

“Wait, U-20? Is he younger than us?” you said.

“Yes, he’s in Tabito’s year, though a couple of months older than him,” she said. “Do you think it’s weird? Oh, it’s totally weird, isn’t it? I’m a creep! I’m a stupid, ugly creep! Lock me away or turn me into the police or something!”

You cut her wailing off with a snicker. “Yayoi, relax. It’s not that weird, and I mean that honestly. It’s hardly even a two year difference, right? My own parents have a bigger age gap, and besides, you both are in pretty similar spots in life, so it shouldn’t be a problem, especially if he’s mature.”

“He seemed mature,” she said contemplatively. “He was super polite and kind when I spoke to him. Plus, unlike my stupid brother, he actually enjoys talking about the same things I do.”

“There you go, then,” you said. “You’re worrying for nothing. The only reason why anyone might say anything is because you’re older than him, but who cares about that? It’s a tired concept, the whole notion of the woman needing to be younger or smaller than her male partner or whatever. As long as he’s single and into you, I’d say you’re in the clear.”

“That’s what I actually called you to talk about!” Yayoi said. “You’ve had a boyfriend, so you know a little more than I do about this kind of thing. How am I supposed to get him to ask me out?”

“Just so you know, having had one boyfriend back in high school doesn’t exactly qualify me to give you advice,” you said. “Also, you can’t really get someone to ask you out. Why don’t you just go to another one of their practices and talk to him again once they’re done? If the conversation is flowing well, then you can ask him out yourself.”

“Um, that would be a great idea if I was brave enough to ask someone out,” she said. “Unfortunately, I definitely am not.”

“You don’t have to be all official and serious about it,” you said. “Don’t say you want to date or anything — ask him if he wants to hang out to continue the conversation at a later time, and then give him your number. That’s all. If he’s interested, he’ll call or text you to make plans, and if he’s not, then he won’t.”

“It’s that simple?” she said.

“I think it is,” you said. “I wouldn’t know from personal experience. Aoyama just asked me out. I never had to do anything.”

“Not all of us can be that lucky!” she said.

“Yeah, I get it. But I have confidence that you can pull it off! It’ll go great, and then you’ll actually be dating a model in Tokyo like you always said you would,” you said.

“Okay…” she said hesitantly. “Y/N?”

“Yayoi?” you said.

“Canyoucometothepracticewithme?” she said, all in one unintelligible breath. You furrowed your brow.

“Could you repeat that?” you said.

“Can you come to the practice with me?” she said. “I don’t think I’ll be able to do it without you pressuring me a bit.”

“Sure, why not?” you said. “Is it in the morning or evening?”

“They have evening practices on Tuesdays. I was thinking we could go to one of those? That’s what I did last time, so it’s an established thing, and anyways I don’t think I could wake up early enough to go to a morning practice,” she said.

“Okay, good, because I was kind of scared I’d have to be up before the sun. I’d do it for you, and in a heartbeat, but I wouldn’t exactly be happy about it,” you said.

“I wouldn’t, either,” she said. “This Tuesday, then? We can have an early dinner or late snack together before heading over.”

“I won’t miss it,” you promised. “Make sure you wear something nice!”

After your Tuesday classes and errands were completed, you met Yayoi at a restaurant you both liked so that you could quickly eat before leaving for the practice. She was nervous the entire way, twirling the ends of her hair around her finger, straightening her already-perfect clothes, and chewing on her lower lip.

“Hey,” you said as the two of you entered the stadium and sat on the first row of benches. “Don’t stress out. If he’s an asshole, we’ll sic Tabito on him. I bet he could beat your crush in a fight, easily.”

“I don’t know,” Yayoi groaned. “Yukimiya’s super tall, and he looks pretty built, too. I think my baby brother might be outmatched.”

“No way,” you said loyally. “I’d bet on him over anyone.”

She glanced at you out of the corner of her eye. “I wish I could have the same faith in him, but considering what a dumbass he typically is, I can’t say I can muster it up. Look, that’s Yukimiya. Still think Tabito’s got it in the bag?”

Discreetly, she pointed out a boy with wavy chestnut hair and an admittedly powerful build. He stood next to Otoya, which only threw it into further relief just how muscular and tall he was. Yayoi hadn’t been lying about that, and neither had she made up how good-looking he was; you could tell just from that first glance that he was heartbreakingly handsome.

“Well,” you said, realizing that maybe you had been a bit overconfident in Tabito’s abilities. But you were too stubborn to change your answer now, and besides, you believed in him no matter what, so you only shrugged. “Yes. Even if it looked like he’d lose for sure, I’d still pick him. There just isn’t anyone else I’d ever choose.”

“Damn,” Yayoi said. “Fine, then. If Yukimiya ends up being an asshole, we’ll see who wins.”

“Deal,” you said. “Although, hopefully it doesn’t come to that.”

“Hopefully,” she agreed.

The practice was long, dragging on past sunset, the field’s lights turning on to ward away the darkness as the moon crept higher into the sky. Yayoi, who had confessed that she hadn’t slept well the previous night, slumped against you and passed out almost immediately, and you busied yourself with a pattern of checking your phone and watching moths fly fruitlessly into the massive lamps.

Finally, the coach blew the whistle to signify the end of the practice, and as the players exited the field, walking past where you were conveniently seated, right by the joint entrance-exit, you shook Yayoi.

“There’s no way you’re in this deep of a sleep,” you hissed at her unmoving form.

“Y/N?” It was not Yayoi but someone else who said your name; namely, Tabito, who had paused in front of you and Yayoi to gaze at you questioningly. “Why are you at my practice?”

“Not now, Tabito,” you said dismissively. Noticing that Otoya and, more importantly, Yukimiya, flanked him, you doubled down on your efforts to wake Yayoi, who remained unresponsive. “You bitch. I bet you’re just pretending to sleep so you don’t have to go through with the plan.”

“Hey, L/N! It’s been a bit,” Otoya said. “I’ve been visiting the place you showed us almost daily. It’s wicked good. You’re the best for bringing us there.”

“Hi, Otoya,” you said. “Sure, anytime. I’m glad you’re enjoying it. Yayoi, if you won’t get up, I’ll just do it myself.”

Without waiting for her to respond, you stood up and bowed slightly at Yukimiya, who seemed entirely bemused by your odd actions. He glanced at both Otoya and Tabito for help, but neither of them had any clue what you were doing, either, so they could offer no assistance to him on that front.

“It’s nice to meet you. I hear your name is Kenyu Yukimiya?” you said.

“Yes, that’s correct,” he said. He had a pretty manner of speech, proper and refined, each word spoken with careful control. “Who might you be?”

“Y/N L/N, but that’s unimportant,” you said. “That’s Yayoi Karasu. She’s Tabito’s barely-older sister. You should talk to her.”

“Y/N!” Yayoi screeched, shooting up to a sitting position. “Why would you phrase it like that?”

“What is going on here?” Tabito said. Otoya shrugged, clearly lost as well.

“So you were faking it the entire time! Never in my life have I met a bigger coward,” you said, clicking your tongue in disappointment.

“Yayoi Karasu?” Yukimiya said. “Oh, I know you! You were here last week, right? We talked about Neon Genesis Evangelion.”

“That’s right! You, uh, remembered that?” Yayoi said. He beamed at her.

“How could I not? The movie is one of my favorites, and none of these guys like it, so it was great to meet someone else who’s seen it so many times,” Yukimiya said.

“Y/N,” Tabito whispered, sidling over to you, the tip of his sharp nose brushing against the shell of your ear. “Please tell me this isn’t what I think it is.”

“Depends,” you whispered back. “If you think this is your sister having a crush on your soccer teammate, then yeah, it is. Otherwise, no.”

“That’s gross,” Tabito said, horror twisting his features. “Yayoi and Yuki? No way. You have to be joking.”

“Why not? Because he’s younger than her? It’s only two years. That’s nothing,” you said. “You should be more supportive.”

“No,” he said, a peculiar edge to his voice. “No, I don’t — I don’t care about that part. I thought you might, but I don’t at all.”

“Huh? Why would I?” you said. “If they’re both interested in each other, and they make each other happy, that’s all that matters. We’re adults, so a few years here and there is meaningless in the grand scheme of things.”

“What about you? Would you ever do it?” he said, breathless and impatient, clenching the hem of your shirt in one fist.

“Date someone younger than me? I’m not sure. I’ve never really considered it; you’re the only one younger than me that I regularly interact with, and, well, you know. There’s a special consideration there. Why? Got a teammate you want to set me up with or something?” you said.

“Absolutely not,” he said, stepping away from you and scowling. “I’d never ever ever let one of those mediocre fucking idiots anywhere near you.”

“Just a hypothetical question, then? I suppose there’s no harm in that kind of thing every now and again. Was my response alright?” you said.

“How am I supposed to answer that?” he said tiredly. “It’s what you think, so obviously it’s fine. I should go now. I don’t want to keep Otoya waiting; he’ll get pissy and annoying if I do.”

“Oh, okay. Bye, Tabito! Let me know if you’re free sometime. I feel like I never see you, even though we’re all but neighbors. We should do something,” you said. The strange tone of the conversation had left you reeling, and you scrambled for something that would make it better, would chase away the anxiety constricting your lungs like a vice.

“I’ll let you know,” he said. It was a dull attempt at sounding excited, and for a brief, striking instant, you wanted to reach out and beg him to wait one second more. You wanted to apologize, though you knew not what you had even done. You wanted him to stay until he smiled at you again, the way he usually did, and then you wanted to — you wanted to — you weren’t sure. You weren’t sure what you would do after that, but you would do something, hold his hand or embrace him or something.

Yet instead, you did nothing, watching as he rejoined Otoya and entered the locker room without a backwards glance, leaving you standing by yourself in the bleachers, your heart hammering in your chest like a crow with clipped wings, thrashing against the bars of its steel cage in a futile attempt to escape.

“Can you believe it?” Yayoi said later. “He asked me out first! I didn’t even have to do anything!”

“Congratulations,” you said, as genuinely as you could. “I’m really happy for you, Yayoi. Fingers crossed that it all works out well. I’m sure it will; he seems like a really great guy, and you both were talking for a while, so you’re clearly compatible.”

“Thanks, I think so too!” she said before narrowing her eyes at you. “What’s up with you?”

“Nothing!” you said. She was so happy that you could not bear the thought of burdening her with your problems, especially when they weren’t even problems in the first place. Yayoi was having none of it, though, frowning at you.

“You can tell me,” she said. You shook your head, so she poked you in the forehead. “Tell me. Tell me. Tell me.”

She punctuated each utterance of the refrain with another poke, until finally you batted her hand away in exasperation “It really is nothing. I just think I did something to upset Tabito — don’t ask me what, because I don’t know — and it’s making me feel a bit out of sorts.”

“He’ll get over it. Why’re you worried? This isn’t unusual. He’s mad at me half of the time. If I felt out of sorts every time he threw a tantrum about something, I’d never feel in sorts,” she said.

“But he hardly ever gets mad at me,” you said.

“Right,” she said, her eyes glimmering. “I forgot the two of you were like that. Hm. I still think you shouldn’t worry too much. If he’s actually mad, which I honestly doubt, then he’ll get over it quickly enough. He’s not capable of staying angry at you for any length of time.”

“If you say so,” you said. “Let’s not talk about it anymore. We need to celebrate you finally saying yes to a guy that asked you out!”

Yayoi blushed but nodded. “Should we go for drinks?”

“It is a Tuesday,” you reminded her.

“Is that a no?” she said.

“It’s a yes,” you said.

“I knew I loved you for a reason,” she said.

“Just for that, you’re covering the tab,” you said. She winked at you.

“Already planning on it!”

The end of your time at university came almost as soon as the beginning had. It was bizarre, walking out of the familiar exam hall for the final time — you knew you had passed, and you already had a job lined up for you in a month’s time, so there wasn’t any cause to worry, and indeed you did not. You only felt odd and light, as if you were floating through the streets of Tokyo, ephemeral like an aluminum wrapper bouncing down the pavement in the wind.

Neither Yayoi nor Tabito could attend your graduation ceremony which was held that Friday; Yayoi had fallen deathly ill, so you had enlisted Yukimiya in keeping her at home, lest she sneak out and kill herself by trying to support you, and as for Tabito, he happened to have a final exam held at exactly the time of the ceremony, which meant he was automatically excluded from attending.

Your parents, as well as both sets of your grandparents, were in the audience, but it wasn’t the same. You couldn’t help yourself from searching for the Karasus, for Tabito in particular, but no matter how hard you searched, it didn’t matter. They weren’t there. He wasn’t there.

When the president of your college, a portly woman with pin-curled hair and red lipstick, handed you your degree, you were hesitant in taking it. Your smile plastered on, you stared towards the door as your fingers inched towards the fancy paper. Any moment now. He’d burst through the door the way you had, and he’d see you, and he’d smile and then wave — it was like a tradition at this point, wasn’t it? It had to happen. He had to come. You knew he wouldn’t, but you couldn’t stop a foolish anticipation from brewing in you as you waited.

Your hands reached the certificate. You held it in front of you as the cameras went off, finally turning away from the door and grinning wider, resolving not to let it ruin your mood. After all, you had worked so hard to achieve this. Why did it matter who was in the audience? It could be an audience of none, and you’d still be happy. You’d still be proud, for no other reason than because you had done it, because all of your hours of studying and classes and homework had finally paid off.

You ate dinner with your family, and then you were invited to go out to a nearby bar by a few of your college friends. Seeing your parents and grandparents to the train station, you rushed back to your apartment to get ready for the night, entirely ready to let loose after what felt like several years’ worth of burdens had just been knocked from your shoulders.

The bar was packed with students from your school, all of whom had had much the same idea as you and your friends. The bartenders were rushing back and forth, sliding drinks out with as much speed as was humanly possible, and before long you were sipping on something fizzy and fruity that one of your friends had handed you.

At some point, one of your classmates, a boy who you had never known particularly well but recognized for his distinctive voice, which could be heard from all corners of the city when he got to bragging about his father’s salary, announced that the rest of the night’s drinks were on him. If you were his father, you’d be furious at the offer, but as you weren’t his father, you took advantage of it with impudence, downing glass after glass of whatever the bartender gave you.

Soon enough, the music and lighting, which you had found so charming and delightful earlier, began to pound at your head. The world spun, not unpleasantly but still in a disorienting manner, and you stumbled towards the door, pulling out your phone and singing to yourself as you decided who you wanted to call.

The cool air of the night was refreshing against your face, and you leaned against the brick wall of the establishment as you squinted at the blinding light of your phone’s screen. You could barely make out the dark characters which stood out on the white background, and eventually you gave up, switching to the keypad and using muscle memory to type in the number your fingers had long ago memorized.

He didn’t pick up until the last ring, and his voice was groggy when he spoke. In the back of your mind, you felt guilty, for you recognized that he must’ve been sleeping, but for the most part you were far too elated to hear him speaking, so you could not bring yourself to be too sorry.

“Hello? Y/N?”

“Tabito,” you said, your words slurring together, dragging out at the ends and trailing into soft breaths. “Tabito, you didn’t come to my graduation.”

He sounded a lot more alert when he spoke next, but he did not change the volume of his voice from that low murmur any. “I told you I couldn’t. I had an exam, remember?”

You sniffed, blinking rapidly. “Yeah, I remember.”

“I’m really sorry I couldn’t make it,” he said. “You know I would’ve been there if I could’ve.”

“Can you come now?” you said, your lower lip trembling.

“Come where?” he said. There was a muffled sound that you assumed was him rolling out of his bed, and then the soft padding noise of his footsteps.

“The bar,” you said. At this point, irrational tears were welling in your eyes. You weren’t even sad, but you couldn’t stop them from rolling down your cheeks, leaving scalding trails in their wake.

“Are you out with your friends? Why do you want me there? Aren’t you celebrating?” he said.

“I don’t know,” you said, and then you were hiccuping as you cried in earnest. “I don’t know, Tabito, I just want you to be here.”

“Okay, okay,” he soothed you. “I just left my apartment. Is it the bar you and Yayoi like to go to? The one by the grocery store?”

“Yes,” you said.

“I’ll be there in a couple of minutes, and then we can decide what to do from there. Does that sound good?” he said.

“Mhm,” you said. “Are you going really fast? Tabito, you play soccer, right?”

“I do play soccer,” he said, sounding equal parts amused and concerned. “You come to watch my games sometimes. I like when you do that.”

“That means you must be fast,” you said. “Mega fast. Mega extra fast.”

“I’m only a little fast. Most of my teammates are faster,” he said.

“Ah,” you said. “But will you still be here super soon?”

“Yes, I’ll be there super soon,” he promised.

“Can you talk on the phone and walk at the same time?” you asked him.

“Well, I’m doing it at the moment, so yes, I’d assume so. Why do you ask?” he said.

“Isn’t that illegal?” you said.

“No, that’s for when you’re driving,” he said.

“Oh,” you said. “You don’t do that, do you?”

“I take the train or walk most places, so I don’t even have the opportunity to,” he said.

“But if you had to drive, you wouldn’t, right? Right, right?” you said.

“Right,” he said. “I’m just around the corner, so I’m going to hang up. Are you outside?”

“Next to the door,” you said.

“Don’t move,” he instructed you, and then he ended the call.

Before you could begin to wail about the abandonment, he was rounding the corner, looking so haphazard that, had you any more presence of mind, you’d have made fun of him for it. His hair stuck up in every which direction, like it had when he was younger and didn’t know how to style it, and he wore nothing but a random t-shirt thrown over a pair of plaid pajama pants, his feet shoved into the black Crocs that Yayoi had bought him as a gag gift last Christmas.

“Y/N! There you are,” he said, his shoulders slumping in relief as he pulled you into his arms. “Look, I’m with you now. Are you happy?”

You giggled. The world still rotated on an unidentifiable axis, but the firmness of Tabito’s grip had a kind of stabilizing effect, holding you in place and together and in one piece.

“Hi, baby,” you said. “Yes. So happy.”

“Baby?” he repeated, and based on the way his skin warmed, he must’ve been blushing.

“Look,” you said, reaching up so that you could play with the ends of his hair. “It’s like when you were a baby. When you were just little baby Tabito. That’s when I met you, you know.”

“I see,” he said, and there was a distinct yet inexplicable despondency to the way that the corners of his eyes crinkled and a muscle in his jaw twitched. “Do you want to go home now?”

“I wanna be with you,” you said.

“That’s fine,” he said, so patiently and tenderly that your head grew fuzzier and fuzzier with every word he spoke. “I’ll stay with you either way, but I think we should probably head back. How much have you had to drink?”

“Um…” you tried to recount what you had ingested, but it was all a blur. “I don’t remember.”

He rubbed the back of his hand against your cheek. “Let’s go home, then. You definitely shouldn’t have any more. Will you be alright if I go inside and tell your friends I’m taking you back?”

“Do you have to?” you said, catching his sleeve and holding it in between your hands. “Why can’t we just leave?”

“They’ll worry about you,” he said, prying your fingers off with the utmost of delicacy. “If you leave without letting them know, they might think something bad happened. I’ll explain what’s going on so they aren’t scared, and then we can head out. Does that make sense?”

“Hmm,” you said. “Only because you say so.”

He chuckled slightly. “That’s good. I’ll be back before you know it.”

You counted the seconds that he was gone, and before you reached the seventy-fifth, he was already back, his face flushed from the heat of the bar, his hair even wilder than earlier from the sweat and the humidity, a dusty footprint on his right shoe where someone must’ve accidentally stepped on him.

“I was expecting to have to convince them to let you go with me, but they were all alright with it,” he said, carefully taking your hand and leading you in the direction of the apartment.

“Sure they were,” you said, tripping over a loose stone, only avoiding face-planting because Tabito caught you with the reflexes of an athlete. “It’s because I talk about you so much.”

“Do you?” he said.

“Totally,” you said with a yawn. “All of my friends know about you and your soccer and your studies. I’m just soooo proud of you, so I mention it whenever you do something cool. Isn’t that what a normal elder-sister-figure would do?”

“Yayoi doesn’t,” he said.

“Yayoi is Yayoi,” you said.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” he said. “And it doesn’t change what I said.”

“Can you carry me?” you said when you almost stumbled and fell for the second time. “Tabito, it’s hard to walk, so can I please ride on your back the rest of the way?”

He exhaled but crouched, beckoning you forward. “If you really want.”

“Yay!” you said, leaping onto his broad back and clinging to his neck, his fingers digging into the flesh of your thighs as he supported you while continuing to walk. “You’re so big now. When did that happen? Have you always been like this? It’s almost as if you’re nearer to being a man than a child, but that’s impossible. You’re still young, aren’t you?”

“It’s not impossible; in fact, it’s the truth,” he said. “If only you ever looked at me and saw me for who I am, you’d have realized I’ve been like this for quite a while now.”

“What do you mean?” you said, resting your chin on his shoulder, closing your eyes, allowing the rhythm of his walk to lull you into a trance.

“It’s nothing,” he said. “Forget about it. We’re almost there. Are your keys in your purse?”

“Yup,” you said. “D’you want them now?”

“I’ll get them from you once we’re at the door,” he said. “Good thing you don’t have a roommate; I’m sure they’d be pissed off by you coming back so late, drunk out of your mind and with a random guy in tow.”

“You’re not a random guy,” you said, dropping the key to the complex in his waiting hand once the two of you reached the glass gate to the building. “If I had a roommate, they’d definitely know who you are. How could they not? You’re my Tabito.”

“Since when I have been your Tabito?” he said, unlocking the door and flicking your chin up playfully before returning his hand to holding up your leg. “I don’t think that I am.”

“Since always,” you said.

“Really? And does that mean you’re my Y/N?” he said, bending down so you could press the elevator button to take you to your floor.

“Yes,” you said. “For six years I did not know it, but ever since then I have been yours.”

“Well,” he said. “Is that how it is?”

“It is,” you said. He switched the lights in your apartment on and deposited you on the couch, heading to your kitchen and filling up a glass with water. Handing it to you, he sat at your side, bringing it to your lips so you could drink, not taking it away until you had drained the cup.

“Feeling better?” he said. “I’ll get you some crackers to eat.”

“Much better,” you said, chewing on the crackers while laying your head on his shoulder. “My stomach isn’t so queasy, and my vision is a lot more straight.”

“You’re talking more normally, too,” he noted. “At least, you sound a bit comprehensible. Want more water?”

“No,” you said. “I’m sleepy. Can we go to sleep now?”

“Here?” he said. “How about you change into your pajamas and wash your face first?”

“I’m too tired,” you said, yawning yet again to emphasize the point, nuzzling your face against the curve of his neck, your eyelashes crushing against his throat. “You’re so comfortable.”

“Thank you,” he said, patting you atop the head. “But you’ll feel horrible tomorrow morning if you don’t get in bed properly.”

“I’ll feel horrible either way,” you said. “I can’t do anything. We were partying for so long, and now I’m exhausted.”

“That’s true, but you’ll feel worse if you sleep here instead of in your room,” he said. “How about I help you?”

“You’ll help me?” you said.

“If you change your clothes, I’ll do everything else,” he promised, gently pushing you off of him and then standing so he could help you to your feet. “I just don’t want you to feel sick tomorrow, be all cramped up from sleeping in a weird spot, and get a break out on top of that.”

“I guess that’s fine,” you said with a dramatic exhale. “You’re so…so…what’s the word? You’re so persistent. Stubborn. Something like that.”

“People say that a lot,” he said.

“They call you an asshole a lot, too,” you said. “All of the time.”

“Yes,” he said, walking with you to your room, where your pajamas were folded at the foot of your bed. “I think I am one, at least a little bit. It’s impossible for me to be otherwise around mediocre people. I try to fix it, but it’s hard, you know.”

“I don’t think you are,” you said. “You’re the nicest person in the whole entire world. If you were an asshole, you wouldn’t treat me the way you do, but you do, which means you aren’t.”

“That’s because you’re special,” he said after a pause. “To me. And also in general.”

“What do you mean by that?” you said, but when you turned around, he had shut the door between you two, allowing you to change your clothes and him to avoid the question.

Only the thought of disappointing Tabito was enough to convince you to not collapse onto your inviting bed. Instead, you trudged towards the door, opening it and pouting at him, trying to beg with your eyes for him to allow you to go to sleep.

“Good job,” he said, ignoring your silent pleas and dragging you to the bathroom, where he sat you down on the edge of the bathtub. “Is this your makeup remover?”

He showed you the little tub of cold cream you kept next to your sink. You mumbled something generally affirmative, and he unscrewed it, kneeling beside you and massaging it onto your face, paying extra attention to your eyes, which was where most of your makeup was concentrated.

“Who taught you about all of this stuff?” you said, your eyes screwed shut as he used a clean, wet washcloth to remove the cleanser from your skin. “Do you have a secret girlfriend?”

“No girlfriends, secret or otherwise,” he said. “It’s all stuff Yayoi made me learn on pain of death. She refused to have a brother who didn’t know anything about proper skincare. It’s not like I do it all that much, but I’m aware of it thanks to her.”

“You’ve really never had a girlfriend?” you said. You supposed you had always been aware of that, but you had never really comprehended what it meant. How could it be that Tabito Karasu of all people had never even gone on a date?

“Nope,” he said. “Can I use this moisturizer on you? I’m sure you have a better routine normally, but it’ll probably be for the best if we skip steps for the sake of getting this done quickly.”

You cracked your eyes open and then nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine. Why?”

“Why what?” he said. The lotion was cold at first, but the circular motions of his fingers on your cheeks warmed it quickly enough that you didn’t even have time to be shocked by the temperature. It was soothing, a tingly sensation washing over you as he worked.

“Why haven’t you had a girlfriend?” you said, his fingertips gliding over your forehead.

“I guess I haven’t found the right person yet,” he said. “Or, no, that’s not it. I have found them. I found them a long time ago, but I don’t — I don’t think they wanted to be found. Not by me.”

“That can’t be true,” you said. “What kind of person wouldn’t want you? Who are you talking about, anyways?”

His thumb swiped over your lips, once and then twice, before coming to rest where they slightly parted. You waited, thinking he might move it, but he did not.

“What will it take?” he said. “For you to stop thinking of me as a child. What more can I do? Name it and I will. If it means you’ll stop thinking of me as your little brother, then I’ll do anything.”

“How else would I think of you?” you said. “You are like my—”

“Please,” he said, and it had been so very many years since you had heard him so distraught that you quieted immediately. “Please stop it. I don’t think of you like that, I don’t love you like that, so please stop it.”

Before you could respond, his mouth replaced his thumb against your own, and he was kissing you, cradling your head in his hands, his ardor winning out over his inexperience as he tried to impress upon you just how much he had wanted you, and for how long.

Unfathomably and without even realizing, you found yourself kissing him back, enjoying every demand he made of you and responding to them each in kind. Your hands wound around his neck and tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck, tugging on the silky, feathery strands, drawing a small whimper out of him as he wedged himself impossibly closer to you. Yet the sound broke you out of whatever daze you had fallen into, so, with a gasp, you ripped yourself away from him, resting your forehead at the dip of his collarbone as you tried to catch your breath.

“No,” you said. “No, I shouldn’t have — we shouldn’t have — you have to go.”

“Why not?” he said. “You said you shouldn’t have, but you did. Why do you wish you hadn’t?”

“You have to leave,” you said, and then you were crying again, soaking his shirt with your tears as the weight of what you had done began to smother you.

“Let go of me first,” he said. Your fingers, still in his hair, flexed but did not loosen. “Y/N. If you really want me to go, I’ll go, but you have to — you have to let go of me first. You have to be the one to do it.”

You wept harder, because you did not know how to let go of him, because you could not fathom doing it, but neither did you want him to let you go first. It was shameful and wrong, but the truth was that, more than anything, you wished for him to stay, to blot away your tears and lay you in your bed so you could sleep the entire night away.

Somehow, you found the strength in you to yank yourself away from him, all in one go. The moment they left him, it was as if your fingertips themselves mourned, aching to return to their rightful place, but instead of obliging, you used them to cover your eyes. Anything to avoid looking at him. Anything to avoid seeing the anguished expression that most certainly marred his features. Anything to avoid knowing that you were the one who had caused it.

You didn’t look up again until you heard the front door close, and then it was all you could do to turn off the bathroom lights and make it to your bed, crashing into the pillows and somehow managing to fall asleep.

As soon as Yayoi was feeling back to her usual self, you sent her a cryptic text essentially commanding her to meet you at your usual spot for food whenever she could. Thankfully, she recognized when you were having an actual problem versus when you just missed her, and she told you she was free that very evening, so you didn’t have to simmer in your thoughts for any longer than you already had.

“Your brother kissed me,” you said when you sat down across from her.

“Hello to you, too,” she said, closing her menu and setting it to the side. She had only even looked at it as a formality; both of you ordered the same thing every time, so opening the menu was meaningless at this point.

“Hello, Yayoi,” you said. “Tabito kissed me.”

“That’s what you wanted to talk about?” she guessed.

“Yes,” you said. “It happened the other night. I would’ve called you earlier, but you were sick, so I didn’t want to.”

“Alright. It’s a little awkward for me, considering he’s my brother and all, but I’ll set aside my biases and do my best. How do you feel right now?”

“I have no idea. How do you feel?” you said, perplexed by the lack of reaction she was displaying.

“Why would I feel anything?” she said.

“Because? Your best friend just told you that your little brother kissed her? Aren’t you mad?” you said.

“Not really,” she said. “I’m surprised it took him this long, honestly. Everyone knows he’s been in love with you for ages.”

“Everyone?” you said.

“Everyone,” she agreed. “Most of our friends, all of my family, both of your parents…he hasn’t really tried too hard to hide it. I’m pretty sure most of them think you like him, too, but I don’t want to make assumptions, which is why I’m asking you how you feel about it all.”

“How did I miss it?” you said. “I didn’t realize right up until — well, you know — that he liked me, let alone for so long.”

“Sometimes people only see what they think they see,” she said. “You thought Tabito would never like you, so that’s what you believed. But he could, and he did. Now what?”

“Now nothing!” you said. “What am I supposed to do, date him? That’s just wrong!”

“Why is it wrong?” she said. “By the way, I’m not all too invested in any particular outcome, just as long as you’re happy, so don’t think I’m trying to steer you towards any specific path. I just want you to be fully honest with yourself before you jump to making decisions about any of this.”

“Thanks,” you said. “Okay, well, first off, he’s your — you, as in my best friend — little brother.”

“Not yours, though,” she said.

“But as good as,” you said.

“I wouldn’t say so. You’ve never treated him like a sibling,” she said. “That’s not to say you don’t care about him, but it’s in a different way than a sister would.”

“He’s also younger than me,” you said.

“Yukimiya’s younger than I am, and we’re perfectly happy. Plus, you were the first to say that there weren’t any issues with that, so why’s it a problem now?” she said, raising an eyebrow at you.

“But that’s — that’s different! You met him only recently. I’ve known Tabito since we were little kids! Doesn’t that make it weird?” you said.

“People get married to their childhood friends all of the time. It’s not that unusual,” Yayoi said. “Is there anything else?”

“No, it’s just strange, that’s all!” you said. “You seriously don’t find it even a little odd?”

“I’ve had a lot longer to adjust to it than you have,” she said with a shrug, sipping on the soda she had ordered with her meal. “Let’s approach this in a different way. What about if you both were the same age, and you met later in life? In a university lecture or something. If that was the case, and he asked you out, would you say yes?”

“Absolutely,” you said without hesitation. “That was a stupid question. Who would say no? He’s smart, he’s good at pretty much everything, he’s sweet and funny and caring; additionally, from an objective standpoint, he’s incredibly attractive. I’d do everything I could to keep him if he happened to glance my way.”

“Even if he ended up being younger than you?” Yayoi said.

“Yes,” you said. “Yes, I — oh.”

She gave you a dull look. “Just so you know, that is not a sisterly way to view a guy.”

“I got that,” you said.

“Do you think maybe it’s possible that you’ve loved him too, almost the entire time?” she said. “Maybe even before you understood what it meant to love someone else? Back when sibling was the closest relationship to another kid that you, as an only child, could conceive of?”

“I guess that that — that’s definitely a possibility,” you said.

“It could be,” she said. “And then the notion of him being your ‘brother’ became so set in your mind that you couldn’t possibly think of him as anything else.”

“There’s a chance that that was what happened,” you said slowly. “But I don’t feel what I did for Aoyama when I look at Tabito. It’s something else entirely.”

“That doesn’t mean you don’t love Tabito,” Yayoi said, flagging down the waiter so you could pay for your food. “It just means you didn’t love Aoyama, or didn’t love him as much. Considering which one is still in your life and which one you haven’t spoken to in years, it’s not unlikely.”

“What do I do now, then?” you said.

“What do you want to do?” she said as the two of you exited the restaurant. “I’ll be your friend no matter what. In the end, it’s up to you.”

“I don’t want to lose him,” you said, suddenly terrified. “I won’t survive if I do. Yayoi, I don’t…”

“You can’t,” she reassured you. “If you haven’t lost him yet, then I don’t think it’s possible for you to. But you know, then, right? What’s next?”

“I do,” you said, taking out your phone and picking up speed, veering in a different direction, turning over your shoulder to shout back at her. “Thank you, Yayoi!”

“Good luck!” she shouted back as you took off at a run, holding your phone up to your ear.

“Otoya,” you said breathlessly, as soon as he picked up. “Otoya, is Tabito there?”

“Uh, Y/N? Yeah, Karasu’s cooking dinner, why?” he said. “You good?”

“I’m coming over,” you said. “Make sure he doesn’t go anywhere, and buzz me in when I get there. This is me calling in that favor you owe me, so do a good fucking job at it, okay?”

“Sure, I can, but why don’t you just ask him to do it directly?” he said.

“I don’t think he’ll pick up if I call him at the moment,” you said.

“Trouble in paradise? This is why I don’t do the whole ‘commitment’ gig. Too many complications,” Otoya said with a scoff. “Fine, I’ll help you, but only because — like you said — I owe you one, and because I’m going to evacuate the apartment as soon as you get here so I’m not caught in the crossfire.”

“Thank you,” you said. “That’s perfect. You rock.”

“Yup, you got it. See you.”

The elevator took too long, so after waiting for thirty seconds, you gave up and went for the stairs, taking them two at a time until you reached the floor that Tabito and Otoya lived on. Then you knocked on the door, waiting with crossed arms until it swung open and revealed Otoya, dressed in a pair of rubber-ducky boxers and nothing more.

“Well, that’s my cue,” he said when he saw it was you.

“Where are you even going to go, dressed like that?” you said, momentarily distracted by the outfit, which was all but offensive to the eye. Otoya winked at you.

“There’s plenty of people in this complex that would welcome me dressed like this,” he said, walking out with a devilish grin. “I’ll go see one of them.”

“You have fun,” you said, unable to do anything but shake your head at the rakish response.

“I definitely will. You…do your best with Karasu. He’s been kinda down, so it’d be great if you could fix him right up again, because his pasta tastes shitty when he’s in a bad mood,” he said, saluting at you before vanishing into the closing elevator.

“Who was at the door?” Tabito said. He wore the pale green apron with white polka dots you had loaned him and never asked for back, and there was a wooden spoon in his right hand, which he used to stir a pot of sauce. “Hello? Otoya? Was it one of your exes again or something? Dude, you’ve gotta stop giving them our address, this is the third time this month that some girl has come to harass you.”

You were still for a moment, standing in the doorway, watching the muscles of his back tighten and then relax as he finished mixing the sauce, setting the spoon down on its stand and putting the lid back on the pot.

“Damn, silent treatment? Was it that bad? It’s your own fault, you dumbass,” he said. “It’s not like I tell you to bring them over. You do that all on your own, and these are the consequences you face as a result. Don’t blame me for it.”

What would you even tell him? He turned the stove to simmer, and you opened your mouth before closing it. You had no idea what to say. You had no idea what was even going on in your mind — you had left Yayoi with such an urgency that you hadn’t had the time to organize your thoughts as you would’ve liked to before such an important moment.

He turned around while untying his apron, his mouth curved into a sneer as he prepared to taunt who he must’ve thought was Otoya messing with him. Yet when he realized it was you, his face fell, as if just by standing there you had reprimanded him harshly.

“Y/N,” he said. You wondered how he could do it, how he could bear to still say your name with the same affection as always. Why hadn’t he left you? Why hadn’t he given up a long time ago? What had you ever done to be worthy of this kind of loyalty? What had you ever done to deserve a person like him?

A lump swelled in your throat, and the harder you tried to swallow it down, the more your eyesight prickled and blurred, until you could hardly see anything at all. For a second you were frozen, and then vaguely you were aware of him taking a step towards you and your inhibitions were lost entirely.

Crossing the expanse of the small kitchen and casting yourself into his embrace, you clung to his neck, crying in earnest when he held onto you as if by instinct, because the way he clutched your waist felt like coming home. He felt like coming home. He felt like butterflies in the spring and leaves in the fall and ice cream in the summer and storms in the winter and every other little thing from your life which you could only ever associate with him.

“I love you,” you said. “I’m sorry, I love you, I love you so much I didn’t even realize it but I do now, I do, and I can finally see that I love you more than anything or anyone, Tabito, so please still love me back, please—”

“Shh,” he murmured, one of his hands moving up and down your back. “Don’t cry. There’s no reason to cry. Y/N, Y/N, don’t cry, I hate it when you cry.”

“I’m sorry,” you said again. “I was such a fool. I didn’t comprehend it, any of it, because I’ve loved you since before I understood what the word love meant.”

He kissed your forehead, your cheeks, the tip of your nose, over and over until your tears abated, and only then did he speak.

“I’ve loved you for longer,” he said. “I loved you before I even knew you.”

“And do you still?” you said.

“Yes,” he said. “I couldn’t stop so quickly.”

“Don’t ever stop,” you said. “But if you do, if you must, then keep it to yourself. I want to at least imagine that you’ll keep loving me for — for a long time.

“Oh, Y/N,” he said. “You don’t have to imagine that. I’ll love you forever if you want it.”

“I do,” you said. “I do want it.”

His lips ghosted along your temple as he smiled. Then, right before they fit against your own, he murmured: “Then that’s what I’ll do.”

Though you had neither reason nor proof, you found that, wholeheartedly and fully, with all that you were, you believed him.

[abbyfmc]

Plot Idea #4:

A girl named (Y/n) was the daughter of a war general whose family always served closely to the royal army, having contact with the king himself. Her mother, on the other hand, was an old childhood friend of the queen of that time so she would bring her children to the castle for visits.

Thanks to this, (T/n) met the yandere prince when they were children, (without any of them being aware that this was only to arrange a marriage for them years later) so they spent a lot of time together playing and talking.

(T/n) was not an only child, as she had more siblings who due to medieval times, died due to diseases such as tuberculosis, including her mother. This saddened her to the point of making her a lonely person. Her father, having her as the only descendant in his lineage and little time to even get married; overprotected her due to fear of losing her, to the point of not letting her accompany him to the palace and leaving her at home in the company of her sisters ([Y/n]'s aunts) and governesses.

The yandere prince had already grown attached to her, as (Y/n) took him out of his monotonous prince life and her absence worried him, to the point of asking (Y/n)'s father repeatedly about his daughter. He knew about the loss of her siblings and mother due to tuberculosis, being the cause of her distancing herself so much due to depression.

He sees that she is not only more beautiful than before and how lonely she is, but how shy and distrustful she has become; he was also the one to blame for distancing himself from her due to his hard and arduous upbringing. He spends time with her and realizes that he is wanting her more and more, while she is still insecure. On the other hand, the old king is very proud of the educational and military work that (Y/n)'s father has done, so in his last days he not only arranges the marriage between (Y/n) and the yandere prince, but also promotes (Y/n)'s father and his family to a very good and high economic, political and social rank.

When the king dies, he leaves his queen a widow and the yandere prince is not only married to (Y/n), but is promoted to yandere king (and thus [Y/n] is promoted to queen). At first (Y/n) didn't want to get married and tried to protest to her father over and over again, but he told her:

-"Listen (Y/n), I don't like this very much either. At first your marriage wasn't a big deal even though the old king had proposed it, but now things are different. Your older and younger brothers, who are the ones who could bring this clan forward, have passed away along with your mother and for that reason our family only has you as a hope. I myself am getting old and you know it, and if something happens to me, there will be no one to look after you once I'm gone. I'm sorry, but we all have a responsibility to fulfill; that is yours and there are no other options."-.

While it was true that her father was getting old and he was quite right, she was nervous and insecure. On the other hand, the yandere prince was delighted with the marriage whose ceremony was finally very close. He promised to take care of her at all times, to the point of not stopping to watch her through guards or by himself. The yandere king introduced her and showed her off to everyone, but he also overprotected her from anyone the yandere king considered a threat, to the point of only allowing his father-in-law to visit her in the palace.

-The End.

Yes, you can use my ideas, just give me credits.

[howcouldmuffin]

Childhood Friend

You’ve always been secretly in love with Jace, but you’ve also been having a secret relationship with his younger brother.

PAIRING : Modern!Jacaerys Velaryon x Fem!Reader x Modern!Lucerys Velaryon

WARNING : NSFW, Modern AU, Friends With Benefits, Polyamory, Mentions about the use of alcohol and drugs, Sex Content, Threesome

AN : When I came up with this plot, I felt like I was crazy, but I really enjoy the messy relationships. I hope you like it. Love.

please be kind to me English is not my first language.

You were sitting in the middle of the party, surrounded by loud music and people dancing as if it were the end of the world. Amidst the revelry, you were the only one who looked out of place, feeling bored and disconnected. Your eyes were fixed on a sight that troubled you deeply.

Jacaerys Velaryon, the boy-next-door you had secretly admired since childhood, was kissing the beautiful Sara Snow. Their compatibility was striking, and it made you feel even more frustrated. Deciding you’d had enough of the party, you stood up to leave, only for Lucerys, his younger brother, to catch your arm.

“Don’t go yet, pretty.” he said. “Let’s head back together. I’ll just grab something. Wait here, okay?” Before you could respond or protest, he dashed off to get what he needed.

You and Luke had the first Friends With Benefits relationship when the New Year's party at his house about a year ago. You went to college for the first year and he was in the last year of high school. It happened very quickly and you were both drunk. You had never been so drunk that you lost time like that before, and it only happened once. But you didn’t regret that he was the one who took your virginity. You and he remain good friends, both in bed and now.

“Want to catch a movie in my room tonight?” he asked, as you slumped in the car that his mom had gifted him for college.

“No thanks, I’m tired.”

“Are you really that thrown off seeing him with that girl? Need something to unwind?” He said with a teasing grin. “Consider this your escape.”

“Fine, fine. I can’t be bothered to argue.” you replied, too tired to protest.

Yes, he knew you had a thing for his older brother, yet here you were, tangled up with him instead. What a mess you were, but it was just a fling. You never expected to end up with his brother—your long-time crush. If it were ever meant to be, it would have happened by now.

When you arrived at his place, right next door, you found the house was quiet, everyone asleep but for a few dim lights casting a soft glow in the hallways. His home was a mansion compared to yours, thanks to his large family, but they always treated you warmly.

As soon as you were in his room, he pounced on you with a kiss. It was fiery and intense, and you struggled to match his rapid pace. He trailed kisses down your neck, but you had to stop him, pushing him gently away with your small hands.

“Luke, let’s just watch a movie.” you insisted. He pulled back, his face showing a hint of disappointment, those irresistible puppy-dog eyes of his giving you a pleading look. “If not, I’m heading home.”

“Alright, just a movie then.” he relented, grabbing the remote. You wandered over to grab one of his shirts, changing into it before returning to him.

“Did you know that when a girl wears a guy’s shirt, it means she’s wearing her boyfriend’s shirt.” he said with a smirk as he flopped onto the bed.

“That’s nonsense.” you shot back. “I wear my dad’s shirts all the time and it doesn’t mean anything.” You lay down next to him, grabbing the remote and flipping through channels to find something to watch together.

“You’re such a goofball.” he said, ruffling your hair affectionately and wrapping an arm around you. Both of you were aware that your relationship had evolved beyond mere friends, but neither of you were ready to put a label on it.

You woke up to find that Luke wasn’t beside you. He must be in the shower. Reaching for your phone on the nightstand, you remembered you had afternoon classes, so there was no rush. You headed to the bathroom to freshen up and found him in the shower.

“I’m heading downstairs.” you called out to him. As you walked out of the room, you ran into Jace, who looked surprised to see you coming from Luke’s room. You just smiled at him and went downstairs.

“Did you spend the night with Luke?” Jace asked, following you down the stairs. “We have a guest room, you know. You didn’t need to stay with him.”

“I just went to watch a movie in his room.” you said.

“We’re not kids anymore. It’s not appropriate,” Jace replied.

“Can you stop acting like my dad?” you retorted, bumping into the housekeeper.

“Good morning, Rhaenyra!” you greeted her with a hug. “Sorry I didn’t let you know I’d be staying over.”

“It’s alright, dear.” she replied, kissing your cheek. “Did you sleep well?”

“I slept great, thank you. I should head back home now.”

“Won’t you stay for breakfast?”

“I can’t. I have classes.”

She smiled warmly at you, just like a second mother. She’s always so kind and generous, always giving you gifts on your birthday. It’s endearing.

“You know, Jace.” she said, looking at her son, “it would be wonderful to have her as another daughter.”

“She already is like a daughter to you.” Jace said.

“Is she heading home already?” Lucerys asked, coming down the stairs.

“Just left.” Jace answered.

“I was going to bring she her earrings.” Lucerys said. “I’ll save them for next time.”

“You all seem a bit off, or maybe I’m just imagining things.” Rhaenyra mused.

“Are you going to the football match today?” Amelia asked as you walked towards the cafeteria.

“Sure, it’s Luke’s first match of the season.” you replied with a shrug. “Aren’t you going?”

“I have to. It’s a chance to cheer on my future boyfriend.” she said with a playful grin.

“Oh really? Who’s the lucky guy this time?” you inquired, raising an eyebrow. “Last time it was Ethan or Finn, right?”

“Ugh, forget Finn. My future boyfriend is Jasper.”

“Jasper? Who’s that?”

“The handsome guy in Professor Michael’s class.” she explained.

“Oh, the one you’ve been gushing about. But you know how the football club guys are.”

“Including your beloved Lucerys?” Amelia teased.

“Let’s not get into that.” you said, pausing. “The last time I mentioned something like this was with Jacaerys.”

“Poor little bird.” Amelia laughed.

“Hello there!” Baela and Rheana, Luke and Jace’s cousins, greeted as they joined you. You often had meals and outings with them.

“We’ve got special seats for the match today if you’re interested—” Rhaena started, but was interrupted by your friend.

“Interested!” Amelia chimed in unison.

“Amelia, you go ahead. I’ll hang out with Rhaenyra. That way, you can fangirl over the guys without any restraint.” you suggested.

“Future daughter-in-law duties, huh?” Amelia joked, exchanging meaningful glances with the twins.

“I’m not, and please don’t say that.” you whispered, recalling the time in your freshman year when you were followed and discovered it was someone who had a crush on Jace. It had made you hesitant to go home alone.

“But let’s grab something to eat before the lines get too long.” you interjected to ease the awkward moment. You couldn’t help but smile at how well you’d played them.

You’re at Jace's birthday party with lots of people around. Right now, you’re sitting next to Luke, who is chatting with his friends while you’re boredly scrolling through social media on your phone. You see Jace walking over and sitting next to you. You notice that Luke’s arm around your shoulder has tightened.

“What did you get me this year?” Jace asks.

“I’m not telling.” you reply. “You’ll have to open it yourself.”

“Can I ask for something extra?”

“Huh? Ask for what?”

“Come with me.” he whispers in your ear and extends his hand for you to take. You glance at Luke, who is still talking with his friends, and decide to follow Jace. You take his hand and slowly get up, but Luke’s arm moves with you.

“Where are you going?” He sees you and Jace. “Don’t let her do anything weird, okay?” He reluctantly lets you go.

You follow Jace to the part of the house he wants to show you. His house is huge, and you know it well. As you pass by many people admiring the man in front of you, you feel how much he seems like a king, and you’re not sure what you are. He’s leading you to the third floor of the house, a place no one else is allowed to go during the party.

You find that he’s taking you to his bedroom, which is close to Lucerys’s room. You wonder what he wants to show you. He opens the door to his room. The décor is different from Luke’s but still part of the same house. You sit down on the long chair at the foot of his bed while he does something.

You slowly explore his room. You haven’t been here often compared to Luke’s room and notice family photos on a side table. You see pictures from when they were children, and you’re in them too. You still hold onto your favorite doll, which you keep in your room. You feel Jace behind you, and you wonder if he’s going to show you something.

“Remember when we were kids?” he hugs you from behind. You’re surprised but don’t push him away. “Don’t worry about anything yet.” He kisses the back of your neck.

“Jace” you try to keep your voice steady. “What are you asking for?” His lips are all over the back of your neck, and the gentle bites that show possession make your body tingle.

“I want you.” You turn to face him. He kisses you without waiting for an answer. You slowly use your hands to push him away.

“Are you sure?”

“Very sure.”

And it happens. You think it’s really good; it’s different from when you did it with Luke. Both are good, but this one feels different. You look at the mirror in his room. He left kiss marks on your neck even though you told him not to.

“I need to find a way to cover this up before going back down.” you tell him as he’s putting on his shirt. “Do you have concealer?”

“You know, darling, you don’t have to cover it up.” he kisses your cheek. “Everyone will know you’re mine.”

“We haven’t talked about this, Jace, and I don’t want to be the center of attention.” He looks a bit disappointed but goes to get something from the drawer to cover it up for you. He keeps staring at you while you handle what he did.

“I promise I won’t do it again.” he says. “I’ll do it somewhere else.”

“I think you should go down first. I’ll come down after.” you say, patting your neck. “I don’t want any trouble.”

“Trouble? With whom?”

“With your girls.” you reply. “They’re pretty scary, you know.”

“What can they do? I only have you.”

“No thanks.” you walk toward the door. “Just come down later.” You close the door behind you and head back to the party downstairs.

When you get downstairs, you notice that the crowd has thinned out and the music isn’t as annoying. You look for your friends but can’t find anyone. A hand grabs your arm, making you turn around.

“Luke.” you’re startled. “Have you seen Amelia or Baela?”

“Where have you been?” He doesn’t answer and asks you urgently. “I’ve been looking for you all night.”

“She was with me.” Jacaerys, who comes down after you, answers and wraps his arm around your waist.

“We were talking in the room.” you tell Luke. “I want to go home now.”

“Let me walk you.” Luke says. You step out of Jace’s embrace and head to the door. He rushes to walk beside you.

When you get to the front of your house, you’re about to say goodbye to him, but he leans in to kiss you. These brothers sure know how to catch you off guard. You kiss him back for a moment before pulling away.

“Are you sleeping with Jace?” he asks. “I’m not mad.”

“Hmm.” you reply. “It was just some fun.”

“Do you like me at all?” he asks. “Am I better than him?”

“Of course, you’re always a lovely little brother, and as for who’s better, I think it’s about the same.”

“Do you love me?” He asks again.

“I’m not sure, maybe.” you say. “We’ve already agreed on the nature of our relationship.”

“I’m okay with Jace being part of us too.”

“What are you talking about?” you laugh. “Just go to bed. Sweet dreams.” You lean in to kiss his cheek and close the door behind you.

It feels strange. You no longer dislike Jace, but he feels distant from you to the point where you no longer want to be his girlfriend. Luke will always be a good little brother to you, but your relationship with him isn’t just sibling-like either. What should you do with this relationship?

You’re currently in a car with two siblings, heading towards their family’s vacation home. You tried every possible way to avoid traveling with them, but luck wasn’t on your side. Your mom insisted firmly that she wouldn’t let you come if you didn’t ride with them. Did they slip your mom some money, perhaps?

You sit alone in the back seat, staring out the side window, trying to ignore the occasional glances from Jace and Luke. Since that party, you haven’t really talked to them seriously, having avoided conversations on purpose.

The vacation home is a place you never thought could actually exist. Nestled in a forest with a lake right in front, it’s a picture-perfect setting. You can’t help but wonder if they were born with a silver spoon in their mouth.

Upon arrival, you all help unload the car. Their luggage is minimal since it’s their family home. Luke comes over to help you with your bag, which you really didn’t need help with since you only had a rolling suitcase and a backpack. Jace goes to open the house door and shows you to the guest room on the second floor.

“My room is on the third floor.” Jace says. “Call us if you need anything.” You nod in acknowledgment before they leave. The tension starts to ease up a bit, they’re probably feeling as awkward as you are. You start organizing your things in the room, pull out a bikini, and change into it, covering up with a T-shirt and shorts.

You decide to go sit in the living room and read, enjoying the view of the lake. When you get downstairs, you find Luke already there, reading a book as well. You choose to sit next to him and try to act as normal as possible.

“The twins said they’ll leave tomorrow.” Jace says as he comes down. “The car had a bit of trouble, and the Green family is stuck in an urgent meeting. They can fly out the day after tomorrow.”

“Did you know?” Luke whispers. “It’s just us here in the house right now.” This makes your face turn red. You quickly use the book to cover your face.

“Want to go for a swim?” Jace asks, pulling the book away from your face before you can respond. He lifts you up and carries you outside, with Luke following closely behind.

Jace sets you down on the wooden deck and takes off his shirt. Luke does the same. You feel extremely shy, even though you’ve all seen each other before; it makes your heart race. You slowly take off your T-shirt and shorts, getting ready to jump in the lake after them.

It feels like going back to childhood again. The three of you used to play together like this all the time. You don’t want to lose such a good relationship, but you might realize too late how important it is. Only now do you understand that it’s almost too late to change things.

You and the two siblings decided to watch a movie together in the living room. You sit down in the middle between them, with Luke on your right and Jace on your left. After some time adjusting the remote to find a movie, you finally settle into the wide sofa.

After a while, you start to notice that their hands are not still. One hand slips under your shirt and begins to slide along your skin, slowly squeezing your chest. Meanwhile, the other hand moves up your thigh, continuing until it reaches your panty. You try to pull their hand away, but it’s ineffective. Their octopus-like hands continue to flow across your body.

“Stop.” you say with an unsteady voice. “We can’t do this.” Your voice trembles and starts to waver.

“Can’t we?” Jace asks.

“Please.” Luke adds. Their puppy-dog eyes make it hard for you to refuse, and their mischievous gaze melts your resolve.

“Alright.” you reply. “But let’s do it upstairs.”

The door to the room closed. The three of you were like magnets drawn together. Luke's lips pressed against yours urgently. You felt their hands, like octopuses, roaming all over your body, both squeezing and biting, leaving red marks.

"Don't leave marks." you said, your voice breaking. As your lips parted, the younger and older ones took their place. Their gazes made you feel as though you were completely naked, even though you hadn't removed a single piece of clothing.

The three slowly moved to the bed, Jacaerys slowly caught you lying down without leaving his lips apart, you saw that Luke was bullish on topless, just like Jace, he slowly held your legs apart, not in a hurry.

"Our angels." Jace said, and slowly took off the shirt and pants that covered you. "All of me" Lucerys is not less. When holding your legs in the shape of an M, smeared the kiss from the lap to your thigh. Use the bite to cause a rose colour around the thigh. Your prohibition is not effective.

Luke's fingers chase cleft, use their fingers to play with your swollen clit, your back is not on the bed, moaning out of your mouth but Jace's hand holds your waist to close to the bed as before, his tongue licks all over his body, bites the waist, chest, upper arms, neck, everywhere in the upper part of your body.

"God— Jace" You sing when his tongue circles your hard nipples. The line of feeling there makes you very sensitive. The younger brother is displeased that you are moaning about your brother. He gradually accelerates the rhythm that drags with your clit faster and faster. Your hands can’t stay still, and you find that Luke’s curly hair makes you feel good.

“Lucerys—” your voice is hoarse, now you are wet and want a lot, Jace leaves your body as a lip again, your other hand is on his face, supporting you in degrees to exchange sweetness for each other

The force in the palm of your hand on the Luke's head increases, a muffled moan from your mouth. When Lucerys starts to use his fingers into your body, you are soaked and needs fulfilment. He doesn't stop at one finger. When your body is conditioned, he gradually increases one finger at a time.

Jace detachs from you and gently takes off his shorts, you can see his hard core, it's big enough to keep you from forgetting its size in a few days, he jerks it up a few times before feeding it to you like a delicious sausage.

“Open your mouth for me, love.” You start by kissing it of his head and start using a small tongue to lick around the tip. His moan makes you feel good. Soon he starts stuffing it into your mouth and you take it as if it's your favorite popsicle.

The hand of the man on top grasped your face and gently rubbed your cheek, lying down, “You are my Goddess.” you feel like you are floating in the sky.

The fingers transformed into Luke's cock came in one go, making you scream incoherently in the mouth. “What a noble cunt.” He moaned. Lucerys held your waist tightly. His hips slammed in with a fierce and unmerciless rhythm.

Jacearys too, the two hips that hit your body are fast and violent, but there's no denying that you'll like it, like it because they're the ones who do, treat as if you're just theirs, no one can take you out of them.

"I'm close, love" Luke said. Use one of his hands to touch your clit. "At the same time." Jace added. The atmosphere in the room is hot, even though the air conditioner is in the degree that makes it possible to cover the clothes. The sweat on your body is popping along the body. The sound of flesh hitting flesh t is loud throughout the room.

The rhythm of the three of you who didn't have any posture to drop or shaft down at all, turned out to be faster with unlimited acceleration. Finally, your finished moan came out. Luke holds your waist tightly, pushing his hips as close to you as possible. While Jace pulled out his core and released it in your abdomen.

Your voice is hoarse after liberation, the body is a little twitching, “Such a good girl.” compliments from Jace, your consciousness is barely left, they turn your body upside down, alternating the place of Luke and Jace, brother's big hands squeeze your hips until it leaves a red mark.

You almost lost your balance when Jace took his finger into your cunt that still had Luke's cum. “Don't let it flow out, love.” He inserted his cock again into one round. “This cunt that never really betrayed me.” He used his finger that relied on your little cunt to clean you and you agreed to do it.

"Good girl." Luke said. "A good girl must not refuse the request, right?" The person in front of you pulls his cock that is no different from his brother up and down. "Suck it." You use your small mouth to gradually dominate the bigness of the man in front of you. It almost can't make you suck. His hand will gradually up your hair. "The most fuckable person"

Your brain has nothing to think about, all white, the sound of flesh and the lewd sound that you are not ashamed of. The tingling below that Jacearys gives almost makes you forget to focus on what is in your mouth. The big palms of Jace and Luke are stamped on your butt as if they are the owner.

“I can't imagine who it will be if it's not you here.” Jacearys bent down to say to you. “Because it's only you.” he continued. “This cunt so tight and that suits my cock the most." The hips that hit in at a speed that is not different from his brother. It hit your g-spot, repeating, making you almost crazy.

“I'm close.” Jace said, and Luke's hand reached to grab your clit, it made you almost scream out with the thrill they received, and you finished squeezing Jace and Luke's cum coming out of your mouth.

You lay on your back on the large bed, with Jace and Luke snuggled close beside you. It was a moment of respite before you'd need to clean up again.

"We've been thinking." Jace said, his voice soft but earnest, "that maybe we should be in a relationship—polyamory."

You glanced at him, then at Luke. “What will my mother and your mothers think?”

"They'll be thrilled." Luke responded with a grin.

“Think about everything we've done over the past two weeks without any of you.”

“You two are incredibly devious.”

“So, do you love us?” they asked in unison, their voices filled with hopeful anticipation.

You smiled and replied, “Yes, I do.”

[ybklix]

forbidden love with innie 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮

★ pairing: yang jeongin x fem!reader

✦summary: Jeongin has it all, he’s a sweet millionaire man with a passion for photography, his only flaw has always been his family, obsessed with power and money, they force him to marry as if he was living in the past, but the only past he loves is you, an old crush that came back into his life as the most beautiful muse. Now he’s trapped, between a false love and a true one.

♡ genre - warnings: MDNI, angst, fluff, brief smut (sex w a lot of feelings): oral sex, fingering and piv, cheating ?, classism, mean jeongin but not to reader, forbidden lovers trope.

word count: 14.4k

╰ ⋆⭒˚.⋆ masterlist - taglist

request<3!

a/n: i feel inspired by jeongin, my bad if it's too long oops

It was like destiny. You never thought you would meet him again like that, the last time you had heard from him was in high school, your mother stopped working for them a couple of years ago so she doesn’t have as much news from the Yangs as she used to tell you, plus you were living with two other roomies and you were trying your best to visit her. But... it happened so strangely for you, the ad didn’t even have his name, it was a completely unknown one, Hwang Hyunjin, and you looked up his face on the internet but being so overwhelmed between the jobs you kept in the summer and the university, you completely forgot about it.

You looked at him as you entered the gallery, you couldn’t believe it, it was the same Yang Jeongin who you had been in love with for years, looking slightly more mature, wearing a suit, standing next to another young man who you’re sure is Hyunjin. They both looked up when they heard you enter, but only Jeongin’s gaze captivated you completely, he still had the sweet look he had as a child, nothing had changed, only his hair color was a coppery blond now and didn’t have braces anymore; his hair combined perfectly with his slightly tanned skin tone, highlighting his marked features, making him look manly and more attractive; he was no longer a child, he definitely grew up. You started to get nervous after coming out of your little trance, where you both looked so stunned and fascinated by each other, for Jeongin, it was like seeing a divine figure in life, you glowed, and you looked just as he remembered you from the last time he saw you, so beautiful and full of life.

Hyunjin had no idea what this was about, but it was obvious he noticed the intensity between the two of you, Jeongin saw you as if he had just seen his favorite painting for the first time, the question if you knew each other popped up in Hyunjin’s mind, but the most important one was, how do you know each other and why did you look like old lovers meeting again.

“Y/n...” whispered Jeongin, taking the surprise of his friend standing next to him.

Hyunjin blinked in puzzlement looking at Jeongin, as there was not even a need to introduce yourself, Hyunjin knew your name because you had signed up for his summer course as an assistant and apprentice photographer at his gallery, you had applied and were about to have your interview, Hyunjin was really fascinated with your work. He considered you a fresh artist with a unique vision.

Hyunjin was Jeongin’s lifelong best friend, but he didn’t know about you and his huge crush he had on you throughout his years of youth because... deep down, Jeongin was an extremely reserved man, besides Hyunjin was studying abroad all the time, he studied with Jeongin in elementary school and they met again until college, although Hyunjin was only one year older than him, but they were never separated even for a moment, they visited each other so often, and in his childhood, the Yangs hung out too much with the Hwangs. They still do, in a nice tradition.

Hyunjin was also surprised by the sudden change in his best friend’s countenance, his face was now shining, he could see the illusion reflected in his sharp eyes that he knew so well. He was shocked, a few moments ago he was so down and furious, shouting how overbearing and disgusted he felt at his family’s stupid decision to arrange a marriage for him... and then nothing, you showed up interrupting the conversation, just when Hyunjin was trying to process the information and reassuring him, saying softly, “Wow, slow down, Innie, what are you talking about?”

And you, you couldn’t help but smile as you heard him say your name. Your breath went out of you, it truly was very pleasing to see him again but... the impact was massive. Your Jeongin, who in fact was never yours beyond your pure imagination. He was so different from you, something so unattainable that you only sighed for, the one who taught you everything, even your greatest passion, like photography.

“Hello” you replied shyly and nervously, “it’s been a while.”

“A very while” Jeongin replied, almost breathless.

You were a considerable distance away from them, if you got any closer to him you think you would melt, more than when you were out there walking a few blocks in the intense summer sun to get all the way to Hyunjin’s gallery.

Both of your hearts pounded, every hair on their bodies bristled with emotion, the feelings never left, they only returned once you met again so unexpectedly. This time the feeling burned with more intensity, you were no longer children who used to play in his backyard.

“Ah, hello, I’m Y/n, I’m here for the interview...” you spoke, clearing your throat and breaking eye contact with Jeongin to see Hyunjin.

Hyunjin smiled amused, there wasn’t much to interview, in fact he was never that serious nor did he plan to be so hard on you, he was just like Jeongin, kind and down to earth despite growing up with all the riches and luxuries of life. But he liked you after seeing that you had the trust, and adoration, of his best friend.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Hwang Hyunjin and this is my gallery, my work area is a few blocks away, we’ll be passing from here to there.”

You raised your eyebrows, gripping your crossbody bag tightly and nervously, looking around the establishment, about to speak and compliment the place but then it dawned on you... he had spoken as if he was already taking you into account.

“Oh... it means that...”

“You’re in” he smiled at you.

Your face still reflected surprise but you were still grateful, you really were grateful, it was a decent job from which you’d learn more about what you actually study and do; and the pay was excellent.

“Can we start now? I’m having an exhibition this weekend and I need opinions” Hyunjin added, rounding his friend’s shoulder, amused to see that Jeongin couldn’t take his eyes off you.

You nodded. You had nothing better to do, than to finally start working. Hyunjin dressed more casual and relaxed than Jeongin... a part of you questioned why he was dressed so smartly, you wondered if he really continued his family’s legacy and company, but you hadn’t read any news of him being the official successor... maybe, after all, from their continuous complaints and dislikes, he forgave them and simply continued to work for them, or at least you thought so. You were not so aware of Jeongin, since years ago, since you treated him as a first love you had to let go, as an ex —you never had absolutely nothing— which you had to forget; besides, despite being handsome and rich, Jeongin was so private, he didn’t share much on social media and kept an impeccable image for the rest of the media, without even his parents asking him to, he really was like that, he never used his money for excesses and whims.

Hyunjin started walking, inviting the two of you to follow him, Jeongin waited for you, to line up with your step and see Hyunjin with his back to you leading you both.

“So... how do you two know each other?” Hyunjin asked amused, turning his head to look at you and then stopped his walking in front of a large white wall, with portraits leaning on the floor.

You were both surprised and saw Hyunjin’s expression waiting for an answer, he was quite interested to hear a good story of two lovers meeting, something new for Hyunjin since he didn’t know you and, during all his friend life, he only knew one girlfriend of Jeongin, whom he dated her since he was 13 and broke up with when he turned 18. And, as far as he knew, Jeongin has been single ever since... until now of course, when just today he angrily yelled at him “I’m getting married!” And it wasn’t at all a happy tone.

“Oh, she’s a childhood friend...” replied Jeongin.

You sighed, knowing that... that was indeed partly true, but the rest of it, somehow embarrassed you. For you, both Hyunjin and Jeongin, were two attractive men from a world very different from your own.

Hyunjin frowned innocently, crossing his arms and hunched his posture to get a closer look at your face, since he thought you were the daughter of someone close to the Yangs, your appearance and attire were so elegant that he naively believed you might be someone Jeongin studied with, took lessons in something as a child and he wanted to know...

“Really? I don’t remember your face? What did you say your last name is, again?” Hyunjin commented in confusion.

Your heart stopped for a moment... you weren’t the daughter of someone with money, you were the daughter of one of the Yang’s maids, who worked for them for long years, even before you and Jeongin were born.

“Ah, nothing like that, Hyunjin; she’s the daughter of one of my nanny’s when I was a kid, she used to come to my house and we used to play all the time” Jeongin answered again, so naturally and calmly, not meaning to say that your mother was a maid.

For Jeongin, your mother was more than a servant, she really raised him when his mother could never do it; as his mother was... a glamorous woman, more concerned about her status than her children, she was always busy with other unimportant matters, being a real high society woman. Jeongin had affection towards your mother, she made him a kind and tender child, in touch with humanity, and made him see the world with normal eyes, not in a privileged way as he lived from day one. Jeongin was only a year older than you, your mother was absent from work as soon as you were born and until you were 2 years old, she went back to work for them on a more irregular schedule and, when you turned five, she went back to a more fixed and continuous schedule so she could earn more money and, at that age, she found a way to sneak you in, putting you in the Yang’s house while she worked; that’s when you met Jeongin, a lonely rich kid who didn’t know the world and lived like a small adult, he had private tutors for everything, math, music, languages, fencing, karate... but he didn’t know the fun of being a kid, you taught him that.

“Ah, I see is that” Hyunjin commented a bit nervously, biting his lip at the thought that maybe he goofed a bit in deducing that you were someone from his same social class, “I think it’s very cute, that you know each other since you were kids.”

Hours passed, Jeongin didn’t want to leave and even less Hyunjin wanted him to, he still had so many questions once you could give them some privacy, still he continued, helping you to tell what your job was and the way you were going to work. So much time passed that it suddenly became night, so Hyunjin didn’t want to keep you any longer, plus he thought it was very likely that Jeongin would suggest you to take you all the way home.

All the information was also useful for Jeongin, who planned to have his own photography exhibition... but he was such a perfectionist that he didn’t know if he was one hundred percent pleased with his work, felt stuck and.... with the stunned news of his supposed marriage it upset him too much... but in all the haze of emotions you showed up again. Clearing it all.

You were more than nervous but you were trying to act like an adult and maintain your posture at Jeongin’s closeness.

“Mmm well, you can come from 10 a.m. and we’ll finish at 5; you’ll have your lunch break and... only when there’s exhibition I’ll need you most of the day, is that okay with you?" Hyunjin spoke, wanting to say goodbye gently so you could finally go home.

You nodded frantically with a smile. You were happy, relieved of something new and that you could finally quit all those little jobs that kept you stressed.

“Good. Nice to meet you, Y/n, see you tomorrow then” Hyunjin smiled at you.

You looked at Jeongin, about to say goodbye but he was quick to say:

“Aren’t you hungry? Let me take you to dinner.”

Your legs almost trembled; you didn’t know how to say no and.... you were seriously dying to spend some more time with Jeongin, you weren’t sure if it would be the last time you’d see him, like on your high school graduation night. It was obvious that you took another less prestigious and financially accessible university because of your parents, while Jeongin took it upon himself to study at the best university in the country. However, your mother, working for the Yangs, kept you in the same schools as Jeongin, from elementary to high school, since one of the good things that family did for you, besides allowing a nice friendship between you and Jeongin for years, was to keep you in that kind of education. Your mother thought it was too much to ask for the expenses of an expensive university so she did her best to get you into a good and decent institution as well.

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes looking at you two amused, he was also starving and wanted to accompany Jeongin to grab a bite but decided to leave his moments to you two alone.

“Okay” you replied with a soft smile.

“See you tomorrow, we have a lot to talk about, huh” Hyunjin said goodbye to his friend in a joking warning tone.

Hyunjin let out a chuckle and as soon as the two of you walked away and walked to the exit, he picked up his cell phone and texted his best friend in amusement:

Weren’t you about to get married? Watch out You’re still missing your bachelor party

The summer air was so hot, hitting your skin and, as you approached Jeongin’s luxurious car, you swallowed dryly nervously, wondering what the hell you were getting into. Jeongin opened the door for you and you sighed as you got inside, sitting in true leather seats, until you saw Jeongin also get in, you put their seat belts on and Jeongin looked at you happily one last time before starting the car, still processing the fact that... you had come back to him.

You felt slightly nervous, not knowing where he was going and insecure that you weren’t dressed for the occasion, he looked so good without trying, he was wearing his suit and he was a handsome man. You didn’t know how to feel clearly, but you were so sure of the warm feeling in your chest at having him close again.

“Mmm... what are you in the mood for?” he asked, breaking the silence.

“Whatever you decide is fine with me.”

Jeongin didn’t respond to that, only spoke again, leaning his elbow on the armrest, bringing his long fingers up to his mouth, slightly awakening in you a spark of desire and tension as he looked so attractive.

“It’s been so long, what have you done? I want to hear from you”

You averted your gaze from him only to take courage and answer him.

“Oh, well, I still have my last year left in college, I’ll graduate until next summer.”

Jeongin released a soft chuckle.

“I see you went into photography, didn’t you?”he turned to look at you briefly.

You hummed in approval.

“I studied photography too, but I’m still thinking about which path to take exactly.”

“Oh, I see, it can be difficult but... you used to like fashion, film and creative director in general, didn’t you?

Jeongin licked his lips, his body was so warm from your presence and he smiled in satisfaction that you still knew him well and hadn’t forgotten his little details.

“Well, I still like all that and I’m in that dilemma... maybe you can help me find my way.”

His comment made a wave of heat travel to your cheeks, luckily the strong air conditioning was hitting your face and you couldn’t quite allow yourself to get hot.

You continued talking, about little things you used to do as kids, reminiscing all your memories and situations you spent together, between big smiles and shy glances; until Jeongin parked his car in the exclusive parking lot of the fancy restaurant-bar he frequents, of which one of his friends is the owner. You had a glimpse of the place and got nervous again, inwardly shouting that if you had known you’d come to such a place with Yang Jeongin, you’d have dressed much better for the occasion.

“The sushi here is the best, you’re going to love it” he commented, turning off the car and getting out so he could open for you.

He was such a gentleman and you smiled warmly knowing he still remembered your favorite food.

You couldn’t believe... this was your first kind of date with Jeongin. When you were young he used to take you all the time to decent, simple restaurants, trying traditional food since the Yangs had an exclusive diet and Jeongin was just dying to sneak out of school and go eat with you at a place where it looked like somewhere with homemade food, from a family, made with love. It used to be simple... now he’d take you to three star restaurants while you wore your slightly formal clothes since you were just waiting to have a job interview. But you couldn’t deny that it felt so good to walk alongside Jeongin, entering the place at the same time, as two men opened the doors for you, walking beside you, on a sort of date.

“So... do you have a boyfriend now?” he asked unexpectedly.

You shook your head quickly, still in surprise at his question.

“Good” he finished.

You and Jeongin approached with the receptionist, a tall, young woman monitoring each diner’s every entrance. You were dazzled by the elegance of the place and they were not yet fully inside, only in the foyer.

“Good night!” she greeted, “Do you have any reservations?”

“Mm, no. Yang Jeongin, table for two in a private room please.”

“Oh, welcome Mr. Yang” the girl corrected herself immediately, making an impression on you of the control and power that his name and image alone can have, “I’m afraid I don’t have any private rooms available” the woman informed, bringing one of her hands in a straight position near her mouth, saying softly like in a sign of something secret, “It’s Mr. Lee and his girlfriend’s anniversary.”

“Oh, really? Felix’s here? Mmm I see, I have to send them flowers,” Jeongin replied.

He quickly pulled out his cell phone from his pocket and typing quickly, of which you curiously saw his screen and realized that he texted someone saying:

Send flowers to Felix’s house for his anniversary with his gf

Jeongin’s attention returned to the woman.

“Amm and why didn’t Felix close the place today?”

The receptionist lifted her shoulders, “I think his girlfriend wanted it that way. Would you like some...?”

“Yes, please, do you have another table available?” he interrupted her.

“Sure, Mr. Yang! My coworker will guide you to your table, just a second” she spoke.

The woman approached another woman who was standing by waiting to guide people, the receptionist reminded her that he was a close friend of the owner and make sure to give him a good place and treat him lightly with specialty.

You followed the young girl until she took you to a very nice place, a little away from the people, close to the wall with perfect lighting. You were engrossed, you had never been in a place like this, not even on your birthdays where you spend your time looking for very good restaurants and partying around your 6 closest best friends; you never thought you’d get to a place like this. But you were with Jeongin, anything was possible with him.

“Thank you so much, Miss” Jeongin thanked politely as the woman left.

He came to your side, pulling out your chair, waiting for you to sit down. You did, and just as he was about to leave for the seat across from you, an old gentleman stopped Jeongin, shaking his hand and greeting him enthusiastically.

Jeongin smiled apologetically at him as he greeted him and suddenly, the old man mentioned a name that gave you chills.

“Congratulations on Nam Juhee; your grandfather told me the news, we’re all very excited!”

Nam Juhee. Jeongin’s first and only girlfriend, as far as you remember. She was... something else. The complete opposite of you. Why did he mention her all of a sudden?

“Ah, thank you, thank you” replied a chagrined Jeongin.

You subtly turned around, you noticed how the old man watched you for a few seconds, you didn’t know it, but he was judging both of you since he evidently found the future heir of the entire Yang dynasty with a woman who is not his future wife, and he thought he was an expert on the subject, believing the obvious, the temptations and slips of a relationship, so he whispered to Jeongin:

“I know you’re young and that can be very difficult... it’s hard to let go of other beauties, but you have to learn to be a strong man and be there for you one and only woman.”

The old man’s voice was rough and he spoke in a tone of a millionaire if that could exist, his sentence only left you more confused. You didn’t know that either, but Jeongin was full of fury to hear that his grandfather was spreading the rumor that he was going to marry Nam Juhee.

Jeongin sat across from you, softening his countenance when he saw you and trying to forget about the Juhee matter, it was something he would solve later, he was there now, with you. But you couldn’t put your curiosity aside, you hadn’t seen him in years, you didn’t know him as well as you used to, so you asked him:

“Why did he congratulate you... for Nam Juhee?”

Jeongin opened his eyes in surprise.

“Ah, it’s nothing. He’s an old guy, he surely didn’t know what he was talking about and I out of politeness just played along.”

You recognized his nonchalant tone, he was lying, you knew it, Jeongin was a bad liar. It was obvious something was up, he mentioned Jeongin’s grandfather and said something very strange... you wondered if it was possible Jeongin was back with Juhee after so long, you just knew they broke up before graduating from high school. You wanted to put it aside and enjoy your moment, however you still asked:

“What about you? Do you have a girlfriend?”

Jeongin raised his gaze from the menu, staring at you and gently denying with an adorable smile from his big lips forming dimples on his cheeks. God, you adored him, wondered why you never tried anything with him and then remembered her name, Nam Juhee, he was always hers.

But now that he didn’t have a girlfriend and you were both adults making decisions of your own... you wondered if it was possible to make Jeongin fall in love with you.

The horrible news was, that you had no idea that Jeongin was an adult without his own decisions, and for the Yangs he was no longer single.

You both ordered and talked again, so comfortable with each other that Jeongin came to think how stupid he was to never confess his true feelings to you, and even more stupid not to look for you all this time.

Jeongin’s life was sweet as vanilla because you were in it. He had everything and he was a great man, everything he wants he got, except for you. But ever since you walked away from him… his life was missing something and everything got worse when he found out about a useless proposal, but when he saw you, everything seemed sweet again.

Both were fascinated to meet again, you were about to leave the table when Jeongin felt another warm hand on his shoulder, he looked up, meeting his friend Felix and his girlfriend, greeting them both with a smile.

“Oh, hey, Y/n, nice to see you again” Felix greeted you.

He always has been a Jeongin’s close friend and you studied in the same schools. You greeted him as well as his girlfriend.

“Can you please explain to me what crazy thing is going on in the Yang's house now?” exploded Felix unexpectedly.

“Oh, you heard it too?” replied Jeongin chagrined.

Felix saw your confused expression and realized that it was not the right time to talk about Jeongin’s hasty marriage rumor.

“Anyway, we have to go, I hope you enjoyed the dinner” Felix hurried to say, with a slightly embarrassed smile, grabbing his girlfriend’s waist and leaving the place.

Jeongin sighed at how simple and affectionate Felix was with his girlfriend, a man 100% free to choose who to be with; he thought about the difference of both families, the Lee’s were free and kind while the Yang’s were incredibly stupid and conservative.

You both left the place after he paid, you waiting behind him with your pink cheeks of embarrassment as he finished up. Jeongin didn’t want to let you go but... he also didn’t want you to take it so rashly that he suddenly invited you to his apartment, you knew he wasn’t that kind of man and you trusted him, a part of you wished he would take the big step and actually invite you over, but you saw him struggle as he wanted to act sensibly. You found him tender.

“Well... I guess you must be tired, you have to work with Hyunjin tomorrow. I’ll drive you home” he warned.

You were so excited. You were living again in your fantasy of a world where only he and you existed... but for some strange reason, the vibe was different, it was still the same innocent feeling but this time you could add something slightly fiery. You had never lusted after Jeongin like that, but realizing he matured so well, you kept fantasizing from time to time about his pronounced jawline that looked so good on him and his long fingers with big hands. He was all man.

You gave him directions to your apartment building. He interrupted you just as you were about to thank him. It was something he came up with, this time he wanted you around, he wanted to make things right. He wanted you like he always did.

“Y/n, you know, I’m about to start my gallery too, but I think I need some help, with the pictures and stuff, mmm would you like to join me after you’re done with Hyunjin?”

You smiled broadly, biting your inner lip trying to contain your joy, he was looking for a way to see you.

“Sure, Innie.”

“If you want me to pay you…”

“I’m fine like that,” you interrupted him, “You, me and your camera just like old times.”

Jeongin smiled broadly, as sincere as he had ever been in a long time.

“Your number is still the same?”

You nodded. Jeongin blushed as he learned that it was only enough to talk to you again to see you again.

“Thank you, Jeongin, it was really nice to see you again.”

And you got out of his car, your heart racing pounding in your chest, so in love with Yang Jeongin again.

[...]

But Jeongin, who drove with a smile all the way to his apartment, came back to reality as he took off his shoes at the entrance of his home and went to sit on his couch, picking up his cell phone and reading Hyunjin’s messages, joking about his tense situation.

Jeongin sighed in frustration as he remembered the morning, his grandfather summoning him to the Yang mansion in his office. Jeongin was sweet and despite being a strange family, it was still his family and he had a soft spot for each of them. So he agreed to go, and his grandfather said everything tactlessly, reminded him that he was already old and his heart wouldn’t hold out long enough and that his wish was to leave Jeongin his legacy, confessing to him that he was always to him like a perfect son, when in reality he was a grandson. He confessed to him that he did not trust Jeongin’s father to leave him everything and that he trusted Jeongin, that he knew absolutely everything and it was true, he spent a lot of time of his life together with his grandfather and made him in a way an old spirit soul, his form of affection was not typical or affectionate, but the love was there.

And then he told him something that Jeongin initially took it lightly, almost as a joke, that also one of his last wishes was to see him married. Grandpa Yang was old and conservative and saw marriage as sacred and another life achievement, still mourning his dead wife for 15 years. The difference was that he did love his wife before he married her.

Jeongin was even tender at first and was about to leave his office trying to reassure him and play along by telling him that he was going to get married soon, but he suddenly says:

“That’s why you are going to marry Nam Juhee.”

Jeongin laughed in disbelief but his grandfather’s expression was serious.

“What?” replied Jeongin.

“You are going to marry Nam Juhee, you’re going to do in a couple of weeks, the ceremony will be held at Deung Jaesang field in the afternoon. Of course you’ll get married in the church. Everything is book, the Nam are more than agreed.”

Jeongin still couldn’t believe it. There was no point in an arranged marriage living in these times. He didn’t even love Juhee, at least not anymore.

He then understood the reason why Juhee was showing up more often at the family gatherings Jeongin was obligated to attend and running into her at every event organized by the Yangs or the company.

His grandfather ended up saying a “I am serious and I hope you are prepared; you can live in the house in the hills or if you prefer an apartment it’s fine, but if you consider having children, the house is the best option.”

Jeongin’s world spun and he almost felt nauseous.

“W-what are you talking about? Nobody here is getting married? I’m not getting married! You better stop with your nonsense.”

Jeongin tried to restrain himself from exploding into a myriad of things to still keep respect for his elder.

“Jeongin, there’s nothing to negotiate, you must do it or-”

“Or what?” he challenged him in annoyance.

“Or forget about what you have. I want it to be that way, end of conversation, what’s wrong? You know Juhee, you used to get along.”

“Are you listening to yourself grandpa? Keep everything, give it to Jeonsik, I don’t care.”

Jeongin knew his grandfather’s seriousness so he just walked out of his home without saying more, his mother tried to stop him but he didn’t listen, he stormed out to tell Hyunjin, trying to process what the fuck he had heard.

He sighed, thinking that he also would take his strike very seriously and from tomorrow he would not show up at the company, instead gathered Hyunjin in the morning so they could talk.

[...]

9:30 in the morning, Jeongin’s younger brother was flooding him with text messages, asking for an explanation of what was going on at home and why everyone was acting strange. Jeongin ignored him and just continued to get ready to meet Hyunjin, but the sound of his door being knocked on completely confused him, he hadn’t been warned that someone was coming into his hallway, so he quickly checked the security cameras outside his door to find his ex-girlfriend standing there.

Jeongin cursed internally and tried not to make noise, showing that he wasn’t home, but the thunderous ringing of his phone indicating a call from her rang; he had no choice but to open it for her, totally indisposed to see her just now.

“Jeongin” she said in surprise, seeing him with only a robe on.

“Juhee, who let you in? I’m gonna fire them” Jeongin replied in annoyance, avoiding looking at her.

“Jeongin, please, I need to talk-”

“About what? You knew about that whole circus? You better stop it with me...”

Jeongin finally looked at her, her eyes were shining and seemed to be asking for forgiveness but he was not moved by an inch of her.

“I don’t want to” she replied firmly interrupting him.

He looked at her incredulously, raising an eyebrow.

“You want to go along with this lie, you really want to marry me? What fantasy are you living in, Juhee?”

“That’s why I was coming to talk to you, to convince you how it can benefit us...”

“I’d rather you to not talk and don’t come looking for me again unless it’s to help me stop such stupidity. I am never going to marry you. Now go.”

Jeongin slammed the door in his face and his body filled with rage again, his blood became heavy, he had never been so angry in his life, but for the moment his plan was to not take the whole fake wedding thing seriously and he would let his whole family go on with their charade while he would continue to live his life, he’d deny everything with the media, call them crazy for attention if necessary, but he wasn’t going to marry someone he didn’t love and certainly not for convenience or a stupid family affair.

Jeongin truly was a romantic. He believed in love because his whole life he lived full of it thanks to you, he couldn’t get you out of his mind.

The reason why he dated Juhee for so many years was because, before he fell madly in love with you, he couldn’t distinguish between true platonic love or a tender and innocent love like almost siblings’, all his childhood he had so much affection and respect for you and when his pubertal body started to notice changes, Juhee appeared, he knew then that something with her could be that kind of love, from thirteen to fifteen he was madly in love with Juhee, she was everything to him but then it became boring for him, almost as if he was just used to her and, at sixteen all the Yang’s believed their romance was so serious, beyond a childish thing and seeing the incredible benefits it would be to unite such young people forever, at that age he was more naive and docile, very easy to manipulate, if he saw the people close to him happy, he believed he was obligated to feel happy too, but it was not so, at sixteen he knew he could love you differently. Jeongin realized it when you had your first boyfriend and he died of jealousy when he saw you together.

You on the other hand, started dating other guys since you really believed you could never have Jeongin loving you the way you wanted so you just tried to fill the void, but you didn’t last too long with them, after all they were still spoiled rich kids and none of them were sweet like Jeongin was, most of the time they left when they found out about your life, humiliated you and treated you with pity; you had enough of them and in the end you walked away from that glitzy and glamorous world you thought you never belonged to, once you entered college.

[...]

On your first day at work you did your best to look prettier, this time you really put more effort into your appearance knowing that at any moment you could see Jeongin.

All night you waited for a message from him, but it never came, you felt slightly disappointed, like the first time you were estranged, when nothing from him ever came into your life again... but being so close to Hyunjin, who Jeongin himself claimed to be his closest friend, you were hoping to feel close to him too.

Hyunjin was with you for an hour and then advised that he had to leave for a moment and it wasn’t until the afternoon when he returned while you were with his assistant going over every detail of the weekend’s event. The footsteps of his characteristic Hyunjin’s chelsea boots touching the floor followed by a:

“Can I stay here to copy everything you do and do it in my gallery?”

From a very pleasantly familiar voice. You looked up to find Jeongin. He was dressed more comfortably, in jeans, boots and a thin sweater loose to his body.

Jeongin had spent the morning with Hyunjin, he explained everything he knew so far. And they both looked confused at the situation and then Hyunjin asked about you, to which Jeongin couldn’t quite explain what you were to him, after so many years.

Jeongin spent the rest of your shift with Hyunjin but he was only paying attention to you, giving you complicit glances and smiling at you, approaching you for gentle conversation and just as the clock struck five and Hyunjin was saying goodbye to you, Jeongin hurried to say:

“I’m leaving too, goodbye.”

This time Hyunjin looked at him proudly, like a father watching his son leave for a date.

“You look nice,” Jeongin complimented you, opening his car door for you to get in.

Your face turned warm; he drove to his gallery establishment, you were impressed, of course, it was a more popular and glamorous place; unlike Hyunjin’s location, which was more artsy and bohemian.

You both walked in and while you admired the place, Jeongin admired you, he felt so good to have all his feelings afloat, love was such a mysterious and unexplainable feeling but always enjoyable for him. It felt so good to be with you; you gave color to his gray and monotonous life at least for a few very long years, he came to the conclusion that in that gap where you didn’t see each other, he did come to need you; something was missing, he didn’t know what it was, until he saw your smile again.

“Woah, well, the place and location are great to start” you spoke, turning to look at Jeongin.

You were surprised, he was smiling and his gaze was so soft on you. You had never seen him like that and it gave you some delicious chills, you liked the way he looked at you. Jeongin was on cloud nine, he felt for a second when two lovers looked for their own place to build a home. His chest became warm, that’s what you were to him, a home where he always felt safe. You’ve seen him cry, get angry, laugh, grow up… and he did the same for you. Jeongin had overthought the situation and felt bad that maybe you must have felt empty as he walked away from you.

“So far this is my job” he mentioned softly, still lost in you and half oriented.

Jeongin showed you a thick photo album and pulled out his laptop to continue looking at his work. You were impressed, he always has been an excellent artist and you admired him too much since he was a kid, he was kind of weird and loved the detail of things, he discovered an old camera from his grandfather when he was ten and from there he found a passion.

“And you’ve never had your own exhibition? This is very good, Jeongin” you smiled at him.

“Thank you, but, I feel like it doesn’t have enough of a match to put them all together. I want a specific theme to exhibit and I can’t find inspiration, also, if I decide on something I like, I have to teach myself how to photograph people.”

“I think you’ll do great. Do you have something already in mind?”

You looked at him and went back to watching his work with fascination, he had already worked with luxury brands like Alexander McQueen, and you didn’t understand why Jeongin always demanded more of himself. You knew that feeling stagnant was a very low blow for him and you wanted to help him however you could.

Jeongin closed his album slightly, brushing against your hand and you looked up instantly.

“Sure. Maybe if I start photographing you again I can gain more confidence” he mentioned seriously, staring into your eyes.

“Me?” you replied with a teasing chuckle, nervous and not knowing how to react.

Jeongin nodded with a small smile, “The concept can turn to you; I’d style you, it’d be fun. Since the place doesn’t have anything yet, we can use it in the meantime as a studio.”

You were hot with embarrassment, the proposal flew out of your mind. But you said.

“Okay.”

“Can I take your measurements so I have the perfect outfit for you?”

Your heart flipped. The rest of your time together, finally Jeongin put shyness aside and started flirting with you, in his own way; he looked so cute that anything from him worked on you. And then, the proposal that was new much to your heart, meeting his apartment.

Destiny was something you didn’t think too much about… but knowing him for so many years, spending time apart and meeting again, made it feel for you so special.

“Finally we can drink without having to hide” Jeongin laughed, passing you a glass of wine.

You admired the spacious place, with an amazing view of the city… you thought of the long, lonely nights your old friend must spend and wished you had enough guts to tell him that it shouldn’t be like that now for him, since he had you, and you always wanted to be his.

“And when did you move?”

“To this place, two years ago, but I left the house as soon as I entered college; god and you only know how much I begged to get out of that madhouse.”

You laughed softly, making yourself comfortable on the soft couch in her spacious living room. Jeongin sat across from you, you felt more comfortable and less pitiful, after all, you used to feel so good next to him.

“And you since when do you live in the building?”

Jeongin just wanted to hear you talk… the words wouldn’t form properly but he really wanted to be with you. If nothing came to his mind, the next thing would be to suggest listening to music or watching a movie.

“Oh, since I started college.”

He stared at you and was lost in you, he thought about how cute you looked with your arm pressed into his couch, and your body turned in his direction so you could better see each other face to face, he was dumbfounded, by the image of your face with his lit up, beige apartment in the background he began to speak, totally aware of what he was saying, but at the same time in a soft, gone tone.

“Sorry for not calling you back…”

Jeongin’s lips were slightly parted and his big eyes were shining; you didn’t think you needed to hear that, until he said it.

A strand of your loose hair fell gracefully towards your face, Jeongin quickly brought his hand up to it and brushed it away putting it behind your ear.

“Were you?” he said again so you looked at him confused, “Were you waiting for my call?”

That gave you chills and you felt the distance of both bodies shorten little by little.

“Were you waiting for me to pick up right away?” you teased softly, tilting your head, an act that Jeongin found adorable.

“I’ve been always waiting for you…”

His thick voice and sincerity upset everything inside you, you knew an incredible tension was building in the place and you were dying for him to be able to calm down, until he said:

“I always wanted to kiss you.”

You smiled. You had nothing to lose now, the two of you didn’t have a partner and you had always dreamed of the feel of Jeongin’s lips with yours.

“You can do it now.”

It took Jeongin years to clear his feelings for you so he could see you again; but less than two days to finally say it all bit by bit without any strings attached, at least not for now.

He approached you, took your wine glass and his to put them on the small table in front of his couch, this time completely close to you, his big hand took your face and finally you kissed. Jeongin started nimbly on you, his lips felt so expert and soft that you tried to keep up with him successfully.

“You can always kiss me, now” you whispered between kisses to which he smiled.

Jeongin took advantage and made it more intense now, his lips were soft but his action was heavy, retaliating for every year of his teenage years where he adored you, he was finally there, with you.

Your night ended in some not-so-innocent kisses, his make-out was so hot that you couldn’t help but feel aroused, you were a woman being touched from the deepest part of your soul, where you will always have a place for Jeongin, but you both decided to stop and he only went to drop you off at your place, telling you very happily that he would see you tomorrow.

[…]

And your story was rewritten the next day when Jeongin picked you up after your work. Hyunjin could only see his best friend’s car outside his gallery and you getting in every day as soon as the clock struck 5.

It was your favorite time of the day, playing the lively little muse of Jeongin, who treated you like a princess and a doll. You would walk into his gallery which for the moment you treated as a studio, Jeongin would bring you amazing designer pieces that he loved for you to model, he would bring you professional makeup artists playing to perfection with your face and you would live in a glamorous world between the cameras flashes.

But your favorite part was when he would come up to you and sweetly shower you with kisses. When the pictures were over, he could kiss you freely as you no longer made use of your makeup, he would grab your waist and share such an affectionate and intimate act with you, then he’d take you out to dinner to different places, as he was terrible at cooking, but one night you offered to cook, living your little romantic dream, while he hugged you from behind and touched you the way he never did, giving you little caresses and getting too close to you.

You both lived carefree, in love, your chests puffing out with pride at finally being able to show your love and have each other. Jeongin was more than ready to ask you to be his girlfriend, he had never fallen in love again, it was as if his heart and mind were always waiting to be healed by you, waiting for your return, his whole world and worries were gone every time you were together, he didn’t want to be away from you. At the same time, he was in a dilemma, if it was too fast to formalize… or if it was exactly the perfect time and you couldn’t wait, as long enough time had passed.

There was no doubt that his feelings were so intense, worthy of being called love. He noticed it, as he lowered his camera from his face and saw you there, doing nothing, preparing a pose, acting awkwardly giving your best; you were to him as dazzling as ten rays of sunshine put together, your personality was beautiful and hadn’t changed a single day since he first met you, he wanted to hug you and never let you go.

And the matter of his fake wedding, it didn’t even exist for him, Jeongin hadn’t heard anything since then, so it wasn’t something he cared about, yet his whole family was acting behind his back, planned in the perfect event and wedding of the year without him knowing anything. There were all the invitees ready, Juhee had her dress, her ring. The last step was to go public, so that even Jeongin would get engaged.

The day of Hyunjin’s exhibition came, you were all the time busy there, a little stressed as you received each guest, until the weight left your shoulders as you saw Jeongin walk in dressed elegantly in a suit, looking so handsome. You smiled at him.

“Excuse me sir, I’m afraid you’re not on the list. Kiss me and maybe I’ll consider you may coming in” you joked with him.

Jeongin played with his coat button and leaned in to give you a quick kiss, causing both of you to explode in warm excitement and, a few seniors to burst into uproar, as the rumor of the wedding between Yang Jeongin and Nam Juhee was well known.

“You look beautiful tonight” Jeongin whispered in your ear.

“Thank you, someone special bought me the dress.”

You were somewhat modest to accept Jeongin’s luxurious and expensive gifts; but all your friends exploded when they saw the kind of gifts he gave you, designer clothes, jewelry, handbags, they encouraged you to receive them and staying with the handsome rich man you tenderly knew since you were little, it was like an unreal fairy tale.

“Will you be here all night?” he asked you.

“Oh no, just until most of them arrive and then another girl will cover for me and I can enjoy the event.”

Jeongin pursed his lips tenderly, “Okay, I’ll wait for you over there with Hyunjin.”

Everything was going well, until your heart burst in surprise at the sight of the woman of your nightmares. Nam Juhee. She looked so beautiful that you even had to avert your gaze, as if seeing her might disrespect her.

She was incredibly millionaire, naturally beautiful without the need for any surgery unlike most of all your former high school classmates who at some point touched the scalpel. She wore a nice black designer dress, a slim diamond necklace sliding down her slender chest and collarbones, looking like a superstar with her perfect image.

She had it all, but she wasn’t on Hwang Hyunjin’s guest list.

She was about to enter, but you stopped her.

“Nam Juhee” you whispered still surprised, catching her attention.

She looked at you in confusion.

“I’m afraid you’re not on the list…” you added.

She drew a half smile on her face, looking at you slightly with her frowns thinking if she knew you from somewhere since you looked familiar.

“I’m not on the list but do really you know my name” she replied amused.

You were about to speak, but Hyunjin’s voice interrupts you, appearing beside you.

“Nam Juhee, what are you doing here?”

“I have to accompany my future husband from now on to everything he does.”

Juhee had a proud expression that Hyunjin almost wanted to laugh in her face except that you were right next to him… and Hyunjin knew you didn’t know about the fake Jeongin wedding thing, so it wasn’t his place to overload you with that information, of something he was sure his friend was going to stop.

“Mmm, Y/n, I’ll take care of the guests now, thank you very much, you can go enjoy the event” Hyunjin spoke to you kindly, taking the iPad from your hands.

“But-” you tried to intervene.

You were confused at the situation since Hyunjin was supposed to be the main attraction and should be at his event getting all the compliments possible. And also slightly confused by Juhee’s husband’s comment.

“Please go” he smiled at you.

You walked away confused, still seeing them and noticed the slight astonishment on Juhee’s face, asking Hyunjin dumbfounded if you were the Y/n she knew.

You ran into Jeongin, who happily grabbed you by the waist and whispered a sweet, “Mm, you’re here.”

Hyunjin didn't want to make a fuss by denying her entrance in front of everyone, so he let Juhee in and immediately called to Jeongin, who confusedly turned away from you to see that it was Hyunjin calling him, he took the call and before he could speak, his friend did:

“Juhee is here and I guess Y/n still doesn’t know about the fake wedding.”

He upon hearing the words fake wedding, moved a little further away from you, with a nervous smile and turning his body so you couldn’t see or hear.

“What are you talking about? That’s not going to happen.”

“Yeah but imagine Juhee telling her all of a sudden, you need to explain it to her, bro. And stop the stupid rumors as soon as possible.”

“What can I do?” muttered Jeongin.

“I don’t know, hide from Juhee or get Y/n out of here. I told Juhee you weren’t here.”

Jeongin turned back to you, with a slightly worried expression to which you brought your hand to his cheek looking at him with concern.

“What’s wrong?”

“Ah, nothing. Shall we watch the exhibition?”

You knew he was lying and noticed that he didn’t look as good as he did a few seconds ago. Jeongin wanted to take you by the hand to start walking, but you stopped him.

“I already know every picture in here anyway, do you want to go get some fresh air? I have to tell Hyu-”

“He’s fine with that, I’ll let him know, grab your stuff and let’s go outside.”

You blinked at how quickly he responded, you felt worried about him since you knew something was up. And as soon as you grabbed your stuff, you were both already outside near where he parked his car.

You moved closer to him, drawing your body to him and holding his soft face again. You thought about how you hadn’t mentioned Juhee because you didn’t want to get upset but he was the one who seemed upset; you wanted to say things like hey, did you know Nam Juhee is getting married? but you thought certain things from the past weren’t worth bringing up.

Jeongin hugged you, you looked at his face closely and in detail and your mouth had to abruptly drop:

“You never told me why you broke up with Juhee.”

Jeongin sighed and lowered his gaze to stare into your eyes. It was time to speak from the heart.

“Because I didn’t love her. I could never love her like I love you.”

His lips twitched, as did every inch of your insides at the shocking news. That meant so many things that you slid your hands from his face to his shoulders.

“I love you” Jeongin confessed, “I don’t care if it’s too soon or too late, I waited too long and I’m here now and I want you to know that I love you, I always have.”

You floated for a few moments, your heart beating intensely but slowly, almost trying to burst out of your chest so it could caress Jeongin.

“Jeongin… you know what, I’ve always loved you too. I still do.”

You looked at him, not blinking for a second treasuring every moment of him with your eyes wide and bright. Jeongin smiled.

“You should date,” he spoke innocently, between giggles and holding you tighter, “Would you like to be my girlfriend?”

You widened your smile, you felt small again, young, being asked by your ultimate crush, but it was more than that, it was a love so intense you couldn’t leave.

You nodded, “Yes” you kissed him quickly, “What day is today?”

“August tenth” Jeongin replied.

You smiled warmly at him and rejoined your lips in a long kiss, there was no more worry just now, just the two of you after finally being able to tell each other that you loved each other under the moonlight. It was cheesy, but so cute that Jeongin’s chest exploded in excitement.

“Mm, do you want to sleep in my apartment?” he whispered between your lips and before you could create a sizzling scenario he spoke again, “Just to rest and sleep.”

You laughed softly, “Okay.”

You let your friends and roommates know that you were going to stay over with Jeongin tonight, clarifying that just to sleep. And amidst laughter and a very sweet Jeongin holding your hand as he drove, you made it all the way to his apartment.

“Mmm, I must have something for you to sleep comfortably” Jeongin said, looking for clothes for you.

Until he finally pulled out one of his oversize shirts and a pair of cloth pajama pants. You changed in his room after he left to give you privacy and pulled the pajama drawstring so you could tie it to your body, even so both garments were still too big for you.

Jeongin came in, finding you adorable in his clothes. He put on his pajamas, comfortable shirt and also a pair of thin cloth pants. You removed your makeup and finally approached Jeongin’s bed a little shyly where he was already lying down.

“Come here” he said to you, in such a manly voice that it almost made you shiver.

Once you lay down next to him, he picked you up and pulled you closer to him, hugging you and making you lean your chin on his chest.

“You’re adorable,” he said again, smiling with dimples in his cheeks.

He kissed you slowly, caressing your entire back and never taking his lips off you. Your body was slightly over his, you brought one of your bent legs up on him and the innocent kisses became more and more passionate. You were both starting to get aroused and panting, so shyly you both stopped right there. And you slept peacefully on his chest.

The next morning you were both awakened by the sound of Jeongin’s ringtone, he had already heard a myriad of notification sounds and ignored them, until a call managed to wake you up. Still asleep, Jeongin took his cell phone from his nightstand and turned to look at you happily, you were stirring in your spot on the bed, stretching your body and opening your eyes in such an angelic way for him.

“Good morning” Jeongin whispered in a husky voice to which you just smiled.

Jeongin knew it was early because of the light in his window and at last he saw that it was Hyunjin who was bothering him so early on a Sunday. Jeongin answered, still carving his eyes and yawning.

“Jeongin tell me you already explained to Y/n, you’re all over the fucking news with the weeding thing!!!�� Hyunjin exclaimed from the other end of the line.

Jeongin abruptly sat up with his eyes wide as saucers, slightly alerting you to his violent movement.

“No! What?!”

Jeongin’s scream startled you, making you wake up completely, he sounded really terrified. Jeongin stood up completely from the bed to walk to his window.

“Dude, fix this now. I’ll be there for you for anything! Let me know everything!”

Hyunjin hung up the call and Jeongin realized the myriad of messages he had, from close friends completely confused, to complete strangers congratulating him. His assistant had flooded him with messages from luxury brands asking to dress him up and Jeongin sighed at the thought that congratulatory flowers would soon be knocking on his door.

“What’s wrong, Innie?” you spoke.

“Nothing, nothing, it was Hyunjin.”

You knew again that he was lying, his nervous countenance and smile were so easy to read. You also looked for your cell phone but realized you must have left it in your bag that was surely in Jeongin’s living room.

“Ugh, I left my phone in my bag” you suddenly said to which Jeongin couldn’t have been more relieved.

He crawled into the bed to get close to you. Faking a smile, he brushed his nose with yours and said:

“Let’s go have breakfast, shall we?”

You nodded happily, saying you’d like to go to the bathroom first and he warned he’d be in the kitchen waiting for you.

“Mm, pancakes, eggs? Or would you like to order something? Do you want to go to your apartment for more comfortable clothes?” he asked you, once he saw you walking towards him while he had his palms resting on the kitchen island.

“Mmm I’m not that hungry, do you want anything?”

“Coffee is fine with me.”

You were about to approach him but remembered your cell phone in your bag to which you changed direction, excusing yourself with a nervous smile and hurrying to his living room so you could grab your phone. Jeongin stood confused, waiting for you.

You and your obsession with checking your cell phone in the mornings upon waking up was perhaps your big mistake that particular morning. You had many text messages from your friends, alerting you, you thought something important had happened so you quickly entered the first group chat with over 100 messages. Your heart stopped, one of your friends sent a screenshot of a news: The most coveted young millionaire is about to get married: Yang Jeongin and Nam Juhee, heiress of Nam Group.

You scrolled down the screen with fear, eyes wide open as you saw pictures of the two of them, old high school pictures calling them a true and preserved love, articles telling you everything you should know about the wedding of the year, and your worried friends texting you:

is this the yang jeongin you’re talking to? at first I thought it was a joke but even the nam came out to confirm it y/n please tell us it’s not true!!! how are you?

It hurt you because they knew how much you loved Jeongin. You suddenly became a zombie absorbed by the news, searching for yourself every single article on the internet, filling yourself with information you didn’t want to read. Pictures of Juhee picking out a dress and showing off her ring, saying how much she loves Jeongin and that they both wanted to do it as soon as possible. You thought it was ridiculous you almost laughed, it felt unreal you also almost thought it was a nightmare and you hadn’t woken up yet.

Jeongin thought you took too long, so he went to check on you.

“Y/n…” he called your name softly, to find you leaning back on one of his couches, your eyes glued to your cell phone screen.

Fuck. He thought over and over again. He called your name again and you felt it like a distant voice.

You looked up, meeting the worried face of your barely boyfriend, who was walking towards you. Your face reflected nothing, your lips were sealed and only your eyes reflected disappointment and astonishment, causing Jeongin a pain in his chest to see you in a way you had never seen him before.

“You’re getting married?”

Was all you could say, wanting an explanation, but so skeptical of everything at this point.

“No, please, that’s all fake, it’s all nonsense…”

“And when were you going to tell me? Only to you I’m your girlfriend but to the rest of the world you’re Nam Juhee’s fiancé?!” you snapped.

“Y/n, please” he begged, trying to touch your arms, thinking what exactly to say.

You dodged his touch and turned away from him.

“It’s a fake wedding!”

“So you gonna marry her?!”

You didn’t want to listen anymore, you thought you knew Jeongin but he wasn’t who you thought he was after all, you thought. He was lying and saying nothing was going on, he was confessing to you that he loved you, you didn’t know if that was true after all either. You angrily made your way to his room, without thinking clearly you started to undress so you could put your dress back on.

“Y/n…” Jeongin went after you, but turned around when he noticed you were undressing, “Let me explain, it was something stupid my grandfather proposed and I flatly refused, I really did; but the damn old fuck wouldn’t listen to me and continued with his crazy game, I’m seriously sorry, please listen to me. I’m not getting married, I’ll come out and say it’s all a lie.”

You didn’t listen to him, you were struggling to put on your dress as fast as you could until you succeeded and quickly walked out, past him. Jeongin chased you back to his doorway where you were putting on your shoes. You ignored him until he stopped his door handle with his big hand, blocking your way.

“Y/n, please listen to me” he said again in a pleading tone.

You saw him furious, he looked agitated as if he had been exercising, his mouth was dry, he was terrified of losing you.

“It’s fake, it’s not gonna happen. I love you.”

His tone of voice was sincere but you were so blinded in anger that you put your hand over his on his doorknob.

“Talk to me when you clear it up. Let me out” you replied coldly.

Jeongin let you out, he followed after you, waiting for the elevator to open.

“I hope you can please try to understand me” he said again.

As the elevator opened, it revealed itself to be Juhee inside walking up to Jeongin’s hallway along with a tall stout guy wearing black with a thuggish look. You and Jeongin watched them with surprise and disappointment, it all looked comical, he told you it was fake but suddenly his future wife appeared in the elevator to his apartment, it was ridiculous.

Jeongin sighed in frustration as her showing up didn’t help him at all. Juhee looked at you in surprise, thinking the obvious, you had spent the night with Jeongin, but judging by your expressions, the two of you didn’t look happy and it was something she was afraid of, Jeongin coming back to you.

You hopped in as soon as they left and averted your gaze from Jeongin until the doors closed; frustrated, wanting to run all the way home.

“Who the fuck let you back in?” spat Jeongin.

“That was Y/N, are you with her?” Juhee hastened to say, raising her eyebrows in concern.

“What do you care, oh my god” Jeongin rolled his eyes in annoyance.

“We need to talk right now, please” Juhee begged, following Jeongin who was walking back to his apartment, ignoring her.

Jeongin was about to grab his stuff and go after you as soon as possible.

“What the fuck..?” he said annoyed as he felt the big guy stopped him from closing his door so Juhee could enter uninvited.

“I know you’ve been seeing Y/n, everyone knows, your family has been watching you and…” Jeongin watched her say, with distaste on his face, Juhee turned to the guy, “Can you give us privacy please? Thank you.”

The thug walked out of Jeongin’s apartment just as she instructed, closing the door behind him.

“Good dog,” Jeongin joked.

Jeongin was so annoyed by the fact that she was coming towards him talking about who he should be with as if she was entitled, one of the reasons he broke up with her besides the fact that he was betraying his heart himself, was because Juhee slept with one of his teachers.

“Jeongin, they are watching you and if you don’t go through with the wedding thing they are capable of… hurt Y/n.”

He sighed, frowned his face in annoyance and touching his forehead, “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Junhee pulled out an iPad, showing pictures of each of your encounters with Jeongin, having dinner, going into his studio, taking you home; he didn't know how to react so once again he didn't take it seriously, except for the part where she mention hurting you, and it did scare him a little that you were being spied on.

“Are you spying on us or…?”

“Jeongin I’m serious, I think you’re aware of what your own family can do if you don’t listen to them.”

That sentence made his blood run cold, she was so right, but he didn’t want to see it clearly. His family could be a monster at times, but to such a degree of going so far as to hurt you? Jeongin didn’t know what to expect from the Yangs anymore.

“And what the fuck are they planning to do? I won’t let them hurt Y/n and I can’t marry you and fulfill their stupid whim either. I will never fucking marry you, Nam Juhee!” Jeongin burst out, it was being too much information and feelings in such a short time.

“You can just pretend!”

“Pretend what? Be a perfect husband for you? What the fuck is wrong with everyone? This isn’t the last fucking century to arrange a marriage.”

“Jeongin this is for real, did you see the fucking guy outside? He’s a fucking hitman your family hired to give me the details of your affair with Y/n, waiting for me to snap so I can send him to hurt her, putting all the blame on me!”

“What?” he said incredulously, ”Affair? Mine with her is not an affair, you and I are nothing, don’t talk about her like that.”

“Jeongin if you don’t get married… Fuck, you don’t know but your grandfather has some kind of terminal illness and arranged everything for this wedding. Do whatever you want with Y/n, I don’t care, but you must hide, a marriage with you is in my family’s favor.”

He ran his tongue the inside of his mouth, annoyed and incredulous, he couldn’t believe the typical excuse of the damn old man dying. Jeongin glared at her one last time, grabbed his things and walked out of his apartment leaving Juhee there amidst the tension and previous screams. He went out looking for you but it was useless, you didn’t answer his calls or messages, they wouldn’t let him into your apartment, so desperate he sent a message to Hyunjin, telling him to tell you that nothing was true and that he was about to stop everything.

Furious with no other alternative, he drove to his childhood mansion, where his parents, grandfather and younger brother lived. He stormed out in a fury, being rude to the poor maid who opened the door for him.

“Where the fuck is everyone, huh?!” he shouted, stranded and accelerated at the immense entrance.

“Mr. Yang Jeongin, they’re in the fifth room on the second floor,” the maid answered him timidly.

Jeongin did not respond and breathing heavily in anger, he pushed open the large doors, revealing in himself his grandfather in a hospital bed, with a nurse putting him on IVs and his parents sitting in front of him.

“Oh, so is it true? You’re actually fucking dying?!” he shouted without thinking.

“Yang Jeongin!” his parents scolded him, quickly getting up from their chairs, “Let’s talk outside, please” his mother whispered to him.

“No, I’ll do the talking. You want me to get married? Fine, I’ll do it, but with who I decide to do it with. And if you don’t have enough time left and want to see me do it already, then I’ll do it now, I’ll marry Y/n.”

Everyone seemed startled by the news, more so his grandfather with the disrespectful and raised tone of voice in which he spoke to him.

“You're not going to marry Y/n, are you insane?” this time his mother snapped.

“Ah, so do you remember Y/n?” her son challenged them.

“I’m not going to let you marry a servant’s daughter, what are you thinking, Yang Jeongin?” his mother looked at him in terror.

“What? I thought you wanted to see me married.”

Jeongin’s mother dragged him out of the room, closing the doors and letting her husband reassure his father.

“Just marry Juhee and let your grandfather believe you; do with Y/n whatever you want, make her your mistress and buy her a damn beach house, but marry Juhee.”

Jeongin was unable to believe what he was hearing, bullshit after bullshit. His body was as tense as it had ever been before.

“Why are you insisting that I do it?”

“Because it will bring us many benefits! Think about it.”

“Then what? I should stay married until the old fucker dies?”

“Yang Jeongin, don’t talk about your family like that! Every family has to make sacrifices, even for the ones they love. Our kind should stay with the same kind.”

“You are not my family. Don't talk to me about love, what do you know about that?” he spat in annoyance, scowling at her with his gaze.

“Just marry Juhee, or you know the unspeakable things your grandfather is capable of” she threatened him.

Jeongin let out a cynical laugh, deep down knowing the kind of psychotics the heartless rich could become.

“So what, you’re going to kill her if I don’t show up for the fucking ceremony?” his mother raised her eyebrows, “Do it!” he challenged her, blinded in anger not knowing what he was saying, “Kill her, do it!” he screamed in her face like a little kid, “Do it and I’ll fucking kill myself too. Will you be able to take the blame for killing your son too?”

“Don’t talk nonsense, Yang Jeongin, it’s a fake wedding! Do what you decide best for the maid’s daughter if you want to protect her.”

His eye twitched in fury and stress. He hated his family, hated the way they talked about you, hated every part of his miserable life. Her heart was empty without you, how could you possibly agree to be with a man who would publicly be married?

[…]

5:30 in the afternoon. You missed Jeongin, your anger had ceased and you wanted to hear his voice again, you wanted to listen patiently to what he had to tell you. You didn’t want to answer the thousands of calls and messages he sent you, you just decided to show up at his studio without telling him, where you just recently expressed so much love, hoping to find your lover there, and you did, his car was parked in front of the place. You knocked on the door and seconds later, Jeongin greeted you with a shocked expression and his big bright eyes, hugging you while whispering your name breathlessly, he couldn’t get enough of saying it and he couldn’t get enough of you either, he needed you in his arms so he hugged you tightly, as if he hadn’t seen you in years. His face got lost in the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent and brushing against your skin, making him feel in heaven again.

“I came because… I know you’re working on something important and you have to finish that thing about your project” you lied, wanting to sound cold but your voice cracked as you lay in his arms.

Jeongin let go of you, he sniffed hard, and as he nodded, you noticed he was about to cry and was holding back, breaking your heart.

He let you in without saying anything and you followed him into the room he used for lighting, cameras and equipment. Jeongin was very sensitive and understood if you didn’t want to talk, just with being near you and you being willing to see him was enough for him.

“Just, this outfit is missing and we’re done with photographs” he spoke in a thick and slightly weak voice, showing you a beautiful white dress, causing you to shiver at the irony.

You looked into his eyes and moved closer to him, you were about to push the dress away and kiss him as he looked so perfect and vulnerable, but the weakness of the moment won you over, thinking that it might be the only time you will wear a white dress together with Jeongin before his ridiculous wedding.

You took the garment and started to dress in front of him shamelessly, making Jeongin blush and avert his eyes, but he wasn’t strong enough to not to see you this time. You moved closer to him, turning your back to him so he can help you with the back zipper; his long fingers pulled up the tiny zipper, you felt the warmth of his breath, he caressed your shoulders for a moment and abruptly you turned around.

“I’ve been waiting for you to make it public about the fake wedding” you blurted out, unable to contain yourself any longer.

Jeongin averted his gaze downward and swallowed nervously.

“Y/n… I, I’m getting married, I’m gonna do it.”

Your chest tightened to an enormous intensity, not the kind of words you expected to hear. Jeongin expected a bad reaction from you, but you remained silent, wanting to hear an explanation. He looked up and met your kind gaze, watching him intently.

“I’ll do it… just to protect you, they’re threatening me that something might happen to you if I don’t, I’m sorry. I’d rather sell my image and sign an insignificant piece of paper than let anything happen to you.”

You couldn’t think of anything but him, so you just said, “And I won’t be able to see you again?”

“I didn’t think you’d want to see me again after I told you I was going to do it.”

You sighed, Jeongin was again on the verge of tears.

“I don’t want to be the other woman” you confessed to which he pouted with his chin quivering as he nodded, ”But I don’t want to lose you either. Because… you don’t love her, right?”

“Of course not, I only love you…. I-I’m so sorry” he stammered finally to burst into tears.

Again you fell to pieces, you held his face as you tried to calm him down and watched him cry, cry for a love that he waited so long for and that he really wanted to be the purest and most adored treasure of both of you. You managed to calm him, wiping his wet cheeks and you watched each other, aching and only with the spark of hope of your love for each other. Your lips met only to reaffirm that there were still feelings in both of you, you did it so slow and desperate, like a goodbye kiss, releasing every energy from your bodies, touching him one last time before sharing him with another woman.

He began to caress you, his wild kisses involved his tongue and both of your bodies were caught between the seduction and pleasure of the moment, becoming completely aroused. Your hands moved down from his face to his marked pecs letting them rest there; Jeongin drew you closer to his body to the point of being able to feel his throbbing erection, absolutely devoted and working only for you, his body reacting and operating only for you. Your core throbbed in satisfaction and each new caress burned your body, you were as needy for sex as you had ever been, so needy for him and his demonstration of love.

Jeongin sensed the synchronization of your arousal with his own in your heavy, panting breathing so his soft lips moved down to your neck, kissing it, causing sweet moans to escape from your lips that were the motivating and pleasurable music for Jeongin. He subtly licked and nibbled your skin, unleashing the arousal of your femininity, moistening your entrance with warmth and intensity. Jeongin continued to lower his kisses, holding you tightly by your waist, he kissed your breast and pulled your dress up, tracing his sweet caresses down your abdomen to your intimate area covered by your panties, he raised his gaze to look at you with a small smile before pulling the garment completely down, leaving your pussy exposed. You sighed at the sensation of your uncovered pussy and felt his breath hit the skin of your mons venus to then be filled with pleasure with his lips kissing it and taking your entire pussy with his mouth, parting your wet folds and starting to lick and suck you, weakening your body, driving you crazy as you were perfectly taken care of in such a sensitive area.

You held onto his shoulder and your other hand stroked his hair, you threw your head back as your chest and abdomen rose and fell battling between the intensity and tension of emotions, while Jeongin enjoyed himself with his face buried in your core. His long, slick finger massaged your clit, while his tongue flicked past tasting your labia and with his other hand he leaned in to open your pussy and relished every inch of it. You gasped, climaxing with his tongue inside you, your body swooning at the force of your orgasm. Jeongin’s cock throbbed choking in his pants, but he just wanted you to have your moment and treasure every sensation he could make you get to feel.

[…]

“So you’ll just pretend until your grandfather dies..” you said, walking into his room, ready to be wrapped in his strong arms again.

“Mmhum” Jeongin murmured, calmer at having you, but at the same time uncontrollably uneasy about the situation.

He took hold of your hands, intertwining them, standing in front of you, unwilling to talk about it, but you had too many questions if you were going to live under Juhee’s shadow, being Jeongin’s mistress.

“And… Will you live together?” the answer was going to break your heart.

You didn’t want to imagine anymore, you couldn’t bear the fact that he would return home every day to her, Juhee would show off her husband and marriage to everyone while you would have to live in messy sheets of a deception with his divided love.

“Y/n, please” he whispered, to get you to stop.

“You’re right. If I will be your mistress I better start behaving like one” you joked, hiding your pain, you let go of his hands and brought your arms up to wrap around his neck.

“Don’t ever say that. You’ll never be that to me; you are everything. My true love.”

You smiled broadly at his corny phrase that made it turn warm to the depths of your soul. You loved him too. You spread your smile to him and you kissed again, more relaxed until the action became more passionate. The temperature rose, leading Jeongin to caress your pussy under your skirt with his fingers; after about your situation a few hours ago, he had this thought of making you his again and again in a passionate union of souls and bodies and, he felt more free to touch you.

You moaned still with your lips trapped in his as you let yourself be carried away by his caresses on your center, his fingers pulling away the fabric and touching you pleasurably all over your folds and sensitive spot, you trembled unable to resist anymore and your sweet lover surprised you with his thumb pressing perfectly on your clit and two of his fingers teasing your insides, filling you but leaving you insatiable.

Jeongin pulled away from you, brushing his nose against yours, enjoying your expression of pleasure and soft whimpers. You had never desired Jeongin sexually, until now, just when he became quite the man and gentleman who knew exactly how to treat you, how to drive you crazy and push you to the edge with his precise touches and movements. Your center moistened his fingers and in the cloud of lust you couldn’t stop thinking about his cock filling you and controlling every inch of you.

He found a rhythm with his fingers, digging effortlessly with his long, nimble digits, almost deep into your loins, bringing you so close to your orgasm.

“Je-jeongin, please.”

You knew exactly what you were begging for, you wanted to be taken by him and his manhood. Jeongin smiled and withdrew his hand from you, making you sigh.

“Let me see you naked, love” he requested, his eyes dark in desire still gazing lovingly at you.

And you quickly obeyed him, showing yourself purely vulnerable in front of him, ready to join your bodies together. Jeongin took you again and kissed you, squeezing and caressing your naked ass and still between kisses, you helped him undress completely, revealing his worked body and well endowed cock, making you throb at the thought of being filled by it, after seeing it finally.

“Let me put on a condom, make yourself comfortable on the bed” he said sweetly, giving you a kiss on your forehead as if it was already a normal thing between you.

You climbed onto his bed, flustered, with your wet pussy and aroused body, waiting impatiently as you watched him reach over to his nightstand and pull a condom from there and then put it on.

He positioned himself between your legs, his fingers again teasing your entrance for a few moments, then lining up his stiff, throbbing cock at your entrance, slowly sliding it in until it made you squeal as it stretched every part of you and felt it brush against your cervix. You both gasped, Jeongin feeling on cloud nine with your walls taking his cock so well.

“Does it feel good?” he added, somewhere between worried and excited.

“Mm, yes Jeongin, you feel so good.”

You hugged him, gently digging your nails into his broad, worked back and scratching him unintentionally as his thrusts were perfection, the latex wrapped around his cock sliding deliciously into you, pounding you slowly and deeply, letting him take you, filling you to capacity. Jeongin’s soft groans in your ear drove you further over the edge, he babbled cute things in his husky voice and kissed you sweetly from time to time, blinding him in lust to the idea of having you all to himself, demonstrating all his love for you.

He continued, thrusting intently, his hips performing a series of delightful motions into your core, his cock bulging over your belly, it felt so good that you cried his name until you arched your back and released the good pain and tension into an orgasm, surrendered between passion and love for him.

[…]

It was supposed to be one of the happiest days of a man whose soul is about to be united for life with the social approval of his acquaintances, with the love of his life. But Jeongin felt miserable, since that was not true, his true love that moved every inch of him would not be waiting for him at the altar today. You were lying in your bed, your heart open, waiting for news that the wedding was over so you could run into his arms and love each other on the sly.

Jeongin could only think of every part of you, all of you that completed him to perfection and the passionate and sweet act you shared before the wedding night, making love completely devoted, promising each other again a lasting love over any adversity, reciting truthful vows into the air as he caressed your naked body entangled in his sheets with his scent.

What rewarded him, was that the day after his wedding it’s gonna be the grand opening of his first exhibition in the gallery you both had worked so passionately on, dedicating it to his true muse, calling it in honor of you and only showing pictures of you, just to piss off the world and show them whose heart truly belongs to him.

Jeongin looked at himself in the mirror, his lip began to tremble and heavy tears slid down his cheeks. His hair was perfectly styled, his expensive suit tailored for him and he was about to leave, where he was surrounded by people and media ready to write fallacies about an empty and fake wedding, Jeongin thought that they believed he had it all, a kind millionaire about to marry another rich beautiful woman, but the truth is that he was and had nothing without you.

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𐙚TAGLIST: @rylea08 @hann1bee @iovecb97 @armystay89 @bubblebisk

[loganwritesprobably]

Planning a Future With You

This didn't do very well on the poll I posted a while back but this is my blog and I do what I want. Also introducing Niji for the first time on this blog

Content/Warnings: Crocodile, Niji and Law headcanons, GN!Reader, talk of marriage and children (both positive and negative), both canon-compliant and "de-programmed" Niji mentioned

Crocodile has always been a future plans kind of guy

He likes to plan ahead, and know what his next steps are, at all times

When you begin to date, he doesn't factor you in initially, assuming your relationship won't last more than six months

And then it does

He begins to factor you into his plans slowly, over time, until eventually you're irreversibly woven into everything

He tells you none of this of course

But in his mind, his future would be wrong without you

He wants to marry you, eventually, with a grand ceremony, all of the bells and whistles included

Nothing but the best for you

Neither of you have actually asked the other about these sorts of things, but it will happen when you're both ready

Already, Crocodile knows what sort of ring he wants to propose with, and how he wants to propose

Crocodile hasn't thought of children

He had a rough childhood, and he's not the most pleasant man and he knows it

It's hard to raise a child, and whether he's cut out for that is pretty up in the air

He'd consider it, if that was something you wanted

Maybe you could adopt an older child, he thinks that would be more his speed if anything

Niji thinks marriage is a given between you

He's a prince, getting married is a non-negotiable, and he likes you more than most. You're not as irritating as a lot of people he'd considered pursuing in the past

And someone has to continue the Germa bloodline, who better than him?

If you were to date a de-programmed Niji though, things would be different

Kids, for him, would be an absolute no

Even with how much his personality has changed, he still finds kids super grating and he couldn't raise a "snot nosed brat"

If you disagreed on this, it'd be a pretty big issue, it isn't a topic up for discussion

Double income no kids lifestyle for Niji

He's not super sold on weddings either, but that's something he's more willing to discuss

Niji wouldn't want something incredibly extravagant, rather he'd prefer a more intimate ceremony

He doesn't actually want to be a perfect Prince of Germa and having a large elaborate wedding would remind him of that

A smaller ceremony, with his siblings, your family if you want them there, and all your friends is more suited to him

Though he'd absolutely brag about being married to you after the fact if you did get married

Because you're the best thing that's ever happened to him

For Law, pretty much everything is up for discussion

He's far more hesitant about kids than marriage

He's still not convinced the two of you are in it for the long haul - how could you want to be with him for that long?

If you were to get married, he'd absolutely leave all the planning and decisions to you. Tell him when you need him to have an opinion, and when to be there

He'd still get a little teary at the sight of you in your getup, no matter how neutral he is on the entire thing

For him, kids is hard

He had good parents as a young boy, and the thought of providing that is nice, warms his little cold heart

But he's also intimately familiar with how cruel the world can be, and he isn't sure he likes the thought of bringing a child into it

But some children are already in that world, and alone

All that to say, he's unsure, and very unfecided

For him, it would heavily depend on what you wanted, and there would be a lot of lengthy discussions to be had on the topic

Requests are open! See below links for my other works, and how to leave requests. I write both canon/canon and canon/reader requests for your enjoyment

AO3 | Fanfic Masterlist | Request Rules | Fic Trades Guide | WIPs

Tags: @claryeverlarkf @uselessboots