#like seriously wasnt worth watching

[goldenstorm0]

notes on the fight:

Tyson looked cute in the poncho thing, like a kid wearing his dad's shirt that's too big

nobody actually likes Paul

the lady's fight was more fun, had more blood and controversy

why do they hug so much

also like, why the fuck is this retired man fighting, does he not have better things to do like birdwatching or golfing or w/e

can someone pls cut that beard it looks stupid

I do not understand the point system

disappointing

The only other fight I watched was the ladies fight, and it was 10x better. The tyson/Paul thing barely even felt like a fight, just a few thrown punches and hugs and moving in circles. The ladies had drama, they looked like they wanted to fuck each other up and keep fighting til one of them was dead

Tyson did look cute in that poncho thing, I have to give him that

[dreamytrashdoe]

The overwatch community gave me a new one today... a D.Va literally said I was bad at Mercy because I was not pocketing her as tank. I am afraid to say this tank is a lost cause 🤡

[aradassbadass]

I just loveeee duke lord he’s so fine 😭 Could you do one of him breaking his celibacy for you bc yall are dating and he’s in loveeee

yes of course *duke voice*

you couldnt help but smile as you watched duke and davo argue as he tried to get him to leave.

“nigga you get a lady and act like a nigga like me aint ya day one boy ill tell ya.” davo said standing hands on his hips.

“nigga shut yo punk ass up.” duke said opening the door.

“oh so you kicking me out, nigga you aint worth a damn” the darker man said shaking his head as he walked out of the door.

“you know you aint have to do him like that now.” you said a small smile on your face as the handsome chocolate man walked towards you.

“yes like hell i did.” he laughs standing mere inches in front of you reaching a large hand out grabbing your cheeks and pulling you in for a kiss.

“i guess.” you mumble between kisses.

“ i need to shower though love bug.” you say as he finally pulls aways.

“you mean we need to shower.” he corrects as you hop down from the stool and walk towards the bedroom.

“oh you gone get in with me mr dennis?” you tease going through the bedroom.

“yes lawd.” he says hot on your heels.

you giggle as he closes the bathroom door behind him hurriedly pulling off his shirt.

“you better not pee on me.” you say turning on the shower, voice serious before bursting out into laughter.

“man what the fuck dont be weird. im a grown ass man fuck i look like pissing in the shower.” he says.

“oh shut up.” you say taking your top and bra off all at once.

a smile finds your lips as you see duke standing there staring.

“you like what you see?” you say walking up to him pressing your naked body against his. instinctively his lips goes between his lips as he nods wrapping his arms around you.

“im knowing.” you giggle pulling away and stepping into the shower letting the warm water cascade down you body and just when you thought the feeling couldn’t get any better you feel dukes large body press up against yours.

“let me wash you baby, you can relax.” he says grabbing the body wash. you are happy to take him up on his offer and you stand there as he lathers the soap between his hands and then onto your body.

he starts with your back, massaging your shoulders then going to your waist.

you moan at the feeling letting your muscles relax and leaning back into his body.

“thats it love let, me take take care of you.” his murmurs softly in your ear.

you close your eyes as his hands wrap around your waist and begins to lather up your stomach. its intimacy like this that kept your hormones at bay.

you went into this relationship knowing that duke was celibate and that wasnt a problem with you seeing as you didnt have a particularly high drive anyways. well then you didnt but now was totally different, all it took from him was a look a slight grab even some words he spoke sent shockwaves straight to your core.

his hands grazing your nipples bought you back to reality.

“fuck” you mumbles as he began to massage your breast.

the motion wasnt new to you as he always did it but something about it was different, it felt more sensual than usual, and then you noticed the feeling on your lower back.

your eyes shot open and you tried your best not to tense up but its like he sense it as his hands stopped the motion.

“im sorry baby, got a mind of his own.” he says a light chuckle.

“oh no, dont be sorry love its ok.” you soothe “glad to know im not the only one feeling needy.” you say the last part slipping out of your mouth before you realized it.

he’s quiet for a moment “baby i always feel it but now i need it.”

his words catch you by surprise, “ you need it?” you say turning around to finally face him, hoping for clarification.

“i love you and im ready to give you all of me.” he says a certain tone of seriousness in his voice.

“all of you?” you repeat.

“all of me.”

his words set you on fire and you slammed your lips into his. you moan into his mouth as he wraps around you and pushed your back against the cold tile of the shower, his hips rutting against you.

a moan escaped your lips as his fingers went down and began to rub between your folds, your wetness turning them slick in seconds.

“ you wet as fuck for me baby, you been wanting this huh.” he quizzes lips momentarily pulling away from yours.

“yes, fuck ive wanted this for so long.” you mewl your hand now the one in motion. you wrapped your hand around his length, the sheer girth sending what felt like electricity to your core. he began to rock his hips into you letting a slew of deep groans slip past his and your lips.

“fuck.” he says speed increasing and his kisses becoming progressively more sloppy. you begin to move your hands with his strokes. you can feel him twitch before he abruptly stops.

you yelped as he wordlessly turned you around and now your breast are what is rubbing against the cool wall.

you feel his leaking tip rub between your ass before you feel him squat a little and then he is sliding into your aching entrance.

“ah.” you moan as he stretches and fills you to the brim.

“fuckkk.” he groans halting inside of you. “this pussy too tight baby.”

youre too drunk on lust to respond you just let out a mewl as he begins to slowly thrust into you. you can feel every vein on his dick as he almost entirely pulls out of you and then slowly pushes back in.

duke bites his lips as he plunges back into the wetness of your pussy. he wanted to go slow and savor every second and inch of this but he knew he wouldnt last a minute if he kept that pace up, so he started to slam into you wrapping his hand around your chin and pulling it back causing you to arch deeper.

you cry out in ecstasy at the feeling, all the months of yearning and craving him- this was making you feel more connected than ever with him.

your own hands goes down and rubs your swollen clit and within seconds your gushing all over his length.

“fu-“ he moans pulling out of you and you feel his warm seed splash on you back.

your at a high you never felt before and all you can do is smile before his baritone voice interrupts you, “and no that wasnt no piss.”

you cant help but burst out laughing and hope that this was the idiot you got to spend the rest of your life with.

[laura1633]

Oh wow i have a serious problem i just went over what i wrote to you and i probably should have stopped at the first two sentences but it gets me upset the abuse lando faces i dont even like the guy i perfer oscar, max, charles and carlos but even i know that sending death threats to someone is not okay, and it upsets me that people almost always take his words out of context like when did lando say he actually had a chance at winning the wdc this year? I've seen people bash on him for the latest race where max raced incredibly, but what they dont seem to understand is that the race's terrible race conditions could have actually seriously injured him, we all seem to forget that the guy is younger then max, less experienced, and has huge problems with self-worth that actively seem to affect the way he race's. the fact that max won in the rust bucket that barely seemed to work in favor of the guy is incredable, but bashing on another driver for seemingly not wanting to take a chance with the awfull race conditions (*please note that this is what it looked like to me on what lando was doing that race where he did make mistakes but the weather wasnt helping ether* also note that that franco, oliver and others commented ether on the weather being dangerous, their cars 'Presumably the cars not agreeing with the weather ether', or the fact they couldnt see for shit and out right stated that someone should have a talk with the fia *i couldnt watch the whole race but ive seen snippets of driver radio's and the like, so i cant say with 100% certainty that this is correct*)

So yeah i think that, if i as someone who doesnt like lando, its really concerning what some people say about the guy and as a side note none of the other drivers seem to notice the hate from what ive seen but this last part might just be me. What are your thoughts on the hate lando's been getting seeming to increase anytime he seems to actually want to enjoy racing with the other more popular (equally popular?) Drivers?

🍑anon

Hi anon, 

That’s okay, I will respond to this ask rather than the previous one (but just for context for anyone else the previous ask was about fan fiction so wan’t anything mean). This ended up being a really lengthy answer because I have lots of thoughts!!! 

I’ll put the answer under the cut and tag as anti Lando despite this really just being my opinion and I personally don’t think I am being particularly harsh here but maybe people will disagree.

Firstly hopefully to most people it goes without saying that sending death threats is not okay, that goes for any of the drivers (and various other individuals that I have seen targeted over the past few years). I also have never understood people specifically going to an individual’s social media page just to spout negativity or abuse at them, if you don’t like someone you don’t need to follow them. 

However, I am surprised that people seem to be shocked that Lando is receiving hate online as this is absolutely nothing new and, if I am being honest, I have seen worse (not that this is a competition!).

I will speak from the perspective of being a Max supporter and say that the abuse he has received both online and at track has been appalling over the years. After Silverstone 2021 there were plenty of comments from people saying he ‘deserved’ such an awful crash or that they wished it had been worse. Even this year there were memes going around saying that maybe we needed a repeat of Silverstone 21 (a meme liked by Lando’s dad no less, not that I think we should be blaming children for their parent’s actions!). Not only that but there is rarely a week that goes by that I don’t see jokes online about how Jos is the only one that ‘can beat Max’ or people posting memes about Max being left at a gas station when he does badly. Max needed a bodyguard in Mexico last year because there were concerns over death threats, he’s been booed up on the podium, had people chanting cheat at him in the fan zone, every comment section on his social media includes comments telling him he is a cheat or that his achievements mean nothing. The British media are like vultures any time there is even a hint of controversy. I don’t know why everyone is suddenly up in arms about Lando receiving hate, perhaps its a case of only caring when it happens to ‘their’ driver. 

It doesn’t just happen to Max either. I don’t follow Lewis on social media but I still know the type or racist abuse he has faced over the years. Other drivers also receive abuse - Lance for example has vile things said about him, Nicholas Latifi was sent death threats after 2021. I am sure most if not every driver has experienced some level of hate. Social media can be extremely toxic. 

Do I think any of the drivers should have to deal with such toxicity? No, but Lando is nowhere near the only one to receive hate and I don’t think someone like Max who appears ‘strong’ should have to put up with things because people get the impression it doesn’t bother him.

Whether the other drivers notice, well probably they do but its not happening just to Lando. Did Lando realise how much toxicity was being thrown at Max after Austria or Mexico? Did he try and calm things with the media or did he double down and make things worse for Max? 

As for taking Lando’s words out of context. That definitely happens from time to time, the same as with any driver. Media goes for clickbait headlines and run with them. The problem is that Lando has also said things that haven’t been taken out of context and that people still find distasteful. The comments about it not being talent and being luck did not come across well. I was tempted to give him the benefit on that one and assume he was referring to himself and saying it was not him being untalented but unlucky but then he doubled down by saying nobody deserved to win the race more than George - how can I take that any other way other than the fact he was saying Max didn’t ‘deserve’ to win the race. 

As for Lando saying he thought he could win the WDC, if he didn’t think he could win it this year then to me that would be more of a concern. He has a championship winning car and has done for most the season, if he can’t win it now then when?! He should have been confident that he could win or at least put up a good fight. I would have had no problem with him openly saying he is going for the championship. Look at Charles who is not afraid to say that whilst it is still possible he is still fighting. I think part of the problem here lies with Mclaren because they should have been fully backing Lando and hyping him up but seemed to flip flop back and forth about whether they thought he was truly in the fight. It’s hardly going to give Lando confidence when his team don’t seem to be backing him as strongly as they could be. 

As for Brazil, Lando didn’t have a great race. George got past him at the start. He made too many errors. Charles finished in front of him despite starting behind him. Max, Esteban and Pierre took a risk staying out on those worn inters, they gambled on the fact the race would be red flagged but also on their abilities and confidence to keep the car on track under those conditions. They all did extremely well and deserved their podium spots. The most important thing though is that all the drivers came away without serious injuries because over the course of that weekend there were numerous occasions where entertainment was put over safety. If a driver felt they had to pit for safety reasons then I am glad they took that step.

Lando is younger than Max but I don’t think we need to baby him in terms of his racing or in terms of giving him a free pass with what he says in the media. He is 24 years old, the same age Max was when Max won his first championship under very intense pressure. 

I think you are correct about confidence or self worth affecting him. Whilst I wouldn't like to comment to much on his mentality, to me (and I don’t tend to watch too many of his interviews so I could be wrong) he seems to flop back and forth between being overly critical of himself and then also not taking accountability and saying someone else just had the fastest car or were lucky. I think it would be really good for him to be able to look as objectively as possible about where he has actually made mistakes and can improve but also being able to pick out the things he has done well and be proud of those things. 

Overall I don’t think any drivers should have to put up with the amount of hate that they have to put up with but Lando is not the only one to receive hate and, dare I say it, I don’t even think it has been as vicious as some of the things I have seen over the years. Social media is toxic and people should be more mindful and realise these are real people - all of them!! 

Also, once again lets be thankful that nobody was seriously hurt over the weekend and lets hope the Fia take steps to act more swiftly when safety cars and red flags are needed and that they put safety above other concerns.

[locustonlioden-blog]

Hazbin Hotel Episode Rewrites

Episode 1 (will be doing all of them)

Take out the “precious daughter” line. This makes no sense seeing how Lilith ditched the family and Lucifer is supposed to be super distant. We get 0 evidence these were involved, doting parents that put a bunch of effort into raising Charlie. Perhaps change it to “And now, its up to their precious daughter” meaning Charlie has taken it upon herself to mend things, instead of making it sound like she’s been coached all along for her role.

Adam and Lute are put off to find out its Charlie meeting with them, not Lucifer as usual. The meeting was arranged because of the very important matter of an exterminator angel being killed for the first time ever, and an important discussion was needed. Adam is much less a 1 dimensional comic relief dude bro.

“So, are you taking over extermination arrangements for now on?”

“Uh, no...actually, it was just kind of out of the blue that he told me about the meeting and asked me to come-”

(seriously, Lucifer supposedly didn’t know about the hotel, or at least he pretended not to, lets just assume he does but didn’t let on to Charlie that he’s watching her)

“Did he tell you why?”

“Ah, no-but, it was really convenient because you see, I have an idea that would actually END the need for exterminations-”

At this point Adam is seriously put off. They just found out demons can kill angels-this has to be a distressing revelation. Now of all times, the guy they have a serious deal with chooses to send someone who wants to talk about ENDING the exterminations? This would almost feel like a threat. So now they want out of the deal? No way! He would feel a need to reassert dominance and get things back under control. Who do these demons think they are? Cue their aggressive mocking and song, followed by throwing Charlie out as they do in the actual episode. He doesn’t even bother to explain why they are moving the extermination up. He’s not going to talk to Charlie. She has not established any sort of repertoire with him that makes him feel as though she is worth having an actual discussion with about a serious matter.

Commercial subplot: Alastor offers a deal to Vaggie in order to help make a successful commercial for Charlie.

“You’re insane, I’d never make any sort of deal with some shitlord

“Hm, such a pity, Charlie will be so let down to see how you fail to manage her project even a day without her. She has to do everything. Why are you even around? Do you really think the princess of hell needs physical protection from a sinner with a spear?”

*sighs* “You making the video for me isnt going to help that.”

“My dear, it wasnt raw power that bent all of Hells sinners to my will. You seem to know me quite well...(this is where we can reintroduce the Alastor lore Vaggie game to Angel Dust in the pilot, instead of waiting until the Mimzy episode to give anything) ...so you see, I have no problems getting things done, and I would be willing to teach you. Imagine what Charlie could achieve, and how much quicker, if she had a competent partner at her side…”

“I’m not making a deal! And you can have fun entertaining yourself with an empty hotel. Nobodys going to want to come to a place a powerful overlord like you so obviously takes as a joke”

“Well, I WILL make a worthy advertizement for the hotel, but I’m going to do it the RIGHT way, and do it for radio!”

She doesn’t make a deal here, but the seeds have now been sown. Her insecurity and feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness are gnawing. She has little feelings of self worth-would it be so bad to sacrifice herself in a deal with Alastor if it meant assuring Charlie achieves her dream? She is tempted.

Vaggie uses a little cunning here. While Alastor manipulates the inhabitants of the hotel to give fantastic line deliveries using a variety of amusing tactics, Vaggie secretly records with the video camera. At the end of the day, Alastor smugly announces that he has the radio ad all ready. When Charlie returns, Vaggie cuts in and says radio AND television ad! The ad then starts to play and is cut off by the news like in the actual episode. Alastor was initially amused she tried to make a tv ad anyway, but he sees enough to tell that she recorded him making the radio ad. His smile tightens, eyes narrow, and he fades off.

[droidders]

Transformers One review

I'll start off with a non spoiler review.

First of all, amazing voice acting especially from Chris Hemsworth and Brian Tyree!! I didnt think Chris would be able to do a good orion/optimus voice but boy was I WRONG. They did amazing. Scarlett Johansson's voice for Elita was an amazing pick and keagan michael for bee's voice is also good.

Stellar voice acting with so much emotion!!

The animation is amazing. And the way they showed the world of cybertron is amazing. The world building in this movie is so good, i seriously feel like cybertron is a real planet with real creatures with its own rules, history, culture. They made the planet feel so alive, its insane.

All the characters were likeable, i was really vouching for all of them to succeed in their goals. The movie knows when to be funny and when to be serious, and it can get REALLY serious when it needs to be. The movie talks about real world problems and reflects it so well.

THE TRAILERS DID NOT DO THE MOVIE JUSTICE.

The trailers really made it look like a kids power ranger type of movie. The trailers gave it a vibe of:

"Bumblebee, you go left! D-16, you go right! And Elita.. well, you just be elita."

When the actual movie really wasnt. I kept my hopes low cause the trailers weren't really hyping me up that much and i didnt expect much from the movie overall but holy moly my expectations were blown away. The movie does have its flaws like any movie but yeah. This genuinely feels like the spiderverse of transformers. Truly amazing.

Overall 9.8/10, amazing job to everyone who worked on this movie, YOU COOKED!!!

I highly reccommend watching it in cinemas. Its worth it, just trust me on this!!!

Waiter! Waiter! I'd like a trilogy of transformers movies that are as good as this!

Id also like to add that this movie is the best transformers movie. And you dont have to be an insane transformers fan like me to like the movie, nor do you have to watch any other transformer movie to understand it. Its a great standalone movie. Its a movie great for both new and old transformer fans and people who are just looking for a good movie to watch.

GO WATCH IT NOW.

Now onto the spoiler review

I said all that i wanted to say about the overall movie in the non spoiler review. Here, I'll talk about the actual characters and story.

THIS IS CINEMA HOLY MOLY.

I had to resist screaming in theaters especially the part where Orion and D16 went to that thruster thing to get a better view of the Iacon 5000 and d16 is all like: "You did all this for me?"

AAAGWGSFEGWGSGDGDHHYDTST

The character development with D16 slowly turning into the monster that is megatron is BEAUTIFUL.

The movie writes d16 in a way that makes us NOT want him to turn evil which makes him slowly turning into megatron and betraying orion all the more heartbreaking. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.

Seriously, his descension into evil makes me wanna cry. His unbridled rage towards Sentinel portrayed through the voice acting is just WOW. You can really feel his anger through his voice.

The way his eyes change as the movie progresses is just great. They did great writing him, deep down I really wanted him to be redeemed and for him to NOT turn into a brute like sentinel even though I knew it was inevitable. Some transformations are good, useful even, but in the case of Megatron it was a terrifying transformation thats unfortunately permanent.

Sentinel prime, as much as I hate him he is still such a great character. I hate him so much I love him. THE SCENE WHERE HE WAS BEGGING D16 TO NOT KILL HIM SENT CHILLS. You can feel the amount of fear in his voice. It was a striking contrast to his confident demeanor, his ruthlessness as a 'leader', and he who is the literal killer of the Primes,

to see him BEG for his life truly shows how terrifying D16 is.

ORION PAX AKA THE GLORIOUS OPTIMUS PRIME.

A wonderful and entertaining main character. THE SCENE WHERE HE JUMPS OUT OF THE PIT AS OPTIMUS PRIME??? Holy moly that was so badass. AND THE LINE WHERE HE SAYS:

"We could've built the future together."

GOD IT MAKES ME WANNA CRY.

The expression he made when he saw D16 being absolutely BRUTAL to Starscream as he realizes that his friend is slowly transforming into someone evil is gut-wrenching.

And throughout the first part of the movie he was this reckless character who did stupid things, he had hope and determination unlike anyone. It made me question 'How could this guy possibly turn out to be the strong leader that Optimus is?'

But during that scene where he talked to the other miners and led the High Guard to sentinel made me 100% sure that yeah, this guy definitely can be a great leader. And the way he gave the miners a CHOICE to join him or not. That is PRIME.

Elita was a straight up girlboss. I love how they didn't make her just another love interest for Orion or made her just this girl who was a good fighter. She was sassy, witty, and a hard worker. I almost feel bad for her getting demoted and having to deal with the mess that is Orion, D16 and Bee. But anyways, shes an amazing character, really likeable personality who is way more than just a bot who's a good fighter (which was the impression i unfortunately got from the trailers)

Her pep talk with Orion was both funny and beautiful. She knows how to break someone down with her words and build them back up to be stronger. I loved her. Not to mention her design looks gorgeous??? Probably my fav elita design of all time.

At first I found Bee a strange addition to the movie and I was scared they were gonna make him an annoying character but thank god he really wasnt! He was a great comic relief character who had a lot of funny lines. He adds so much silliness into a serious movie and not in a bad way.

He knew when to be serious and the gravity of the situation with Sentinel being a terrible, corrupt leader. I loved the portrayal of him as this almost crazy guy whos been stuck being alone talking to inanimate objects in a place where all he does is burn trash all day (makes sense as to why he talks so much).

A really good character, thank primus they didnt make him annoying or overbearing.

Lastly, Cybertron itself. THE WORLD BUILDING IS SO GOOD. It's environment, its people (or bots?) make the planet feel so real. All of these cool mechanisms with the road and trains, the landscape during the train scene with the vapor wave-esque sun is just gorgeous. Such a beautiful portrayal of Cybertron that I love.

I personally dont think the movie NEEDS a sequel since the rest of the transformers just takes place after this, but if they make another movie thats as good as this, Im not complaining. If they do make a new movie though, I'll guess that it probably has something to do with the Quintessons or something idk.

Its a really beautiful take on Megatron and Optimus' backstory. And though there are many takes on it like how megatron was a gladiator and not a miner, etc,

This is still probably my favorite take on their story, its a really interesting portrayal of them and their fallout.

Anyways thats the end of my yap, honorable mentions to the music, it helped the immersion of the movie, and its really good.

Do note that Ive only seen it once, i might've gotten some stuff wrong but ill be looking to watch it again somehow in the future. My review may be subject to change but yeah.

Buh-bye!!

[whore4mattsstubble]

THE BOYFRIEND

m.s

summary:matt meets his teenage daughters new boyfriend..

yours and matts daughter,macey ,had a boyfriend.you was happy for her but matt wasn’t a fan.

macey came running down the stairs shouting at her father,

“omg!! dadddd!”

macey rolled her eyes at the sight of her dad laying in his pjs scrolling on his phone.

“danny is on his way,you need to get dressed.”

matt stared at his daughter as he sighed and finally complied.

“fine but this ‘boy’ better be worth MY time.”

he empathised the ‘my��� as he got up to get ready.

-later on-

a knock was lightly hit onto your small, happy family’s door.

macey basically threw herself down the stairs ,fixing her hair and new dress she’d just put on,shouting to her parents

to come down. you were in the kitchen getting a glass of water for yourself, while matt was walking down the stairs smiling slyly as he saw his daughters face drop. you were confused as you watched her face droop but as soon as you peeked your head around the door frame that blocked your view of what made her smile fade,you realised..matt was wearing his t-shirt..or more like THE t-shirt,to be more specific the one that read..’i know i have a beautiful daughter but i also have a gun,a shovel and an alibi’

you burst out into a fit of giggles ,the water from the cup you just drank out of almost spilling out your mouth, but macey did NOT find that funny at all.

as you laughed she gave you a death stare which made you laugh even harder.

macey broke the awkward silence.

“dad. change. now.”

matt laughed and cut himself off with a simple but strong “no.”

your daughter stared at you for a moment until she said,

“mom please tell him to change!”

you thought for a second and stared matt down.

“hey,sweetie mabye you-“

you were cut of as matt opened the door giving you and macey a smirk.

the boy was stood outside he definitely heard the conversation that just happened. he stood outside awkwardly awaiting to be allowed in. you could tell he was a kind and polite boy but matt couldn’t care less.

“oh my god come in! sorry sweetheart.”you invited danny,the boy,in.

“its fine Mrs.Sturniolo,”

it was obvious the poor boy was intimidated by matt,especially his shirt.

the boy gulped as matt looked him up and down,danny put his hand out to shake your husbands hand as he looked up at him.matt firmly shook his daughters boyfriends hand.

danny finally spoke up

“p-pleasure to meet you,uhh sir? or is that to formal? h-how about Mr.Sturniolo.is that okay..?”

matt stared down at the boy.

“sirs fine,kid”

matt sat down staring at the basketball that was playing on the tv.

you spoke up.

“oh danny your poor thing,you can sit

down if you want!”

danny sighed a sigh of relief

“thank you Mrs.Stur-“

you cut him off

“ you don’t have to call me ‘Mrs.Sturniolo, y/ns fine darling!”

the boy was seemingly more comfortable with you than your husband

“oh thank you,mrs- oh i mean y/n!”

he gave you a most sincere smile youd ever seen.if you wanted your daughter to be dating anyone it would be

this boy.

you left the room with your daughter leaving matt and danny in the living room.

the awkward tension wasnt getting better so matt spoke,

“what are your intentions with macey.”

the boy was startled by this sudden approach.

“u-uhm ,sir i just want to make her feel happy and uh-comfortable.”

“ok.good..” matt mumbled

“are you having ‘it’ with macey yet.”

matt was straightforward no questions asked.

“no,matt- i mean sir. no sir.”

matt gave a sigh of relief

“phew, if you were i would’ve murdered you right hear right now!”he chuckled.

dannys face was full of fear.

“just joking ,kid, but seriously you picked the right answer.”

macey walked in,

“hey dad, hey danny! ima steal him for a bit, love you dad”she grabbed dannys arm and pulled him upstairs.

you walked into the living room after macey and danny left to go upstairs.

“hey ma “ matt breathed

“hey bernard” you giggled

“mamas.dont call me thatt.”

“fine” you rolled your eyes jokingly

“i have come here for a reasonnn thoughhhh!”you pouted.

“and whats that baby?” matt raised his eyebrow playfully.

“why do you have to be so mean to danny! he’s such a sweet,good and polite boy!”

matt mumbled,”i dont know im just trying to protect my daughter,shes are only child ,ma!”

“fine.but shes 16 now shes bound to grow up.”you reply.

“fine you’re beautiful face and voice has convinced me to give the boy a chance.but only one.”matt sighed but smiled.

you kissed matts head and got up.

“atta’ boy!”

he smirked.

-when dannys about to leave-

macey opens the door for danny and plants a kiss on his cheek and whispers

“i love you , see you soon.” and skips up to her room.

matt and y/n then walk to the door.

“awh i hope you have a great day,aslong as you look after my macey your a good boy danny.”you say smiling

“thank you for having me miss y\n,see you soon.” the boy said.

he then stared at matt a lump grew in his throat.

ah kid i tried to hate ya’ but i couldnt your in my goodbooks. matt patted him on the back

danny smiled and said

“see ya sir”

and walked off he was a

good boy.

“see wasnt that hardd was it bernard!!”you smiled

“i said dont call me that mamasss!”

“but he is a good kid”

“he is indeed,he definitely was scared of you though.”

you said.

[crescencestudio]

after i noticed the enchanted demo release i did a whole ass lap around the house and when i tell you im so close to biting my table every time the scenes change... THE ATMOSPHERE?? THE ART??? THE ENTIRE THINGYS?!?! i wanna bundle this all up and like,. absorb it, eat it even. I played through it straight, no pause no nothin'. im REPLAYING IT even and trying not to run laps around the rooms here. my brain chemistry has been altered. i saw the divine. i am not the same person i was like 2 hours ago. the love, the skill, the gui, the art, the writing the all of it, it's amazing, divine even. like, i want this painted on my ceiling. like im not joking i want this entire game painted on my ceiling.. i remember playing the very first demo and being FLOORED bc hello??? banger plot banger characters whats not to love (the #gayforkayn from like 2 years ago has a whole section in my heart LMAO). and now the enchanted demo is release, and im still so in love no even more in love with the game. seeing the work being done on alaris has been the one of the highlights throughout the time ive been around, and im so happy for you! so a big congrats to this milestone and all the work that has been done to get here! im writing this in a like half awake moment so dunno how much makes sense and also im sorry if this got long i swear it wasnt like this when i started. i be remembering and writing but the enchanted demo gives me the best shakes someone could get. but seriously, i can feel the love that went into this. my heart and soul are happy, and once again a massive congrats to this milestone and every bit of work done to reach it. the entire demo has so much love poured into it and every little piece of the game just makes me get those good shakes in my heart (if that makes sense). (I also did not mean for this to get a little bit long but, im just so proud and happy for you)

KARMA U R ONE OF THE OGS….. i literally remember u still from like the two years that have passed since the first demo. IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO KNOW U LIKE THIS VERSION TOO!!!!

revamping everything has honestly been a crazy and Extremely Tiring experience. i never would’ve imagined two years ago i would’ve been able to replace everything i have. the different vfx (snowblossom my beloved), text effects, assets, and just everything took up so much time to replace. a lot of times i wondered if it was even worth it since the changes felt small. but i rly do feel like seeing the end product now, it feels so different from the og and in a way the demo is a reminder of how far i’ve come on my dev journey compared to the og release 😭

so thankful as always for the ppl (new and old) who have watched over alaris’s development. it means a lot to know the ppl who have played the new demo can see how much work has been put into it and like it 💖 i sometimes get self conscious comparing alaris to intertwine since a lot of new ppl came here bc of intertwine. but its def moments like this that remind me how special alaris is to me just by virtue of it being my OG project. like this is literally my child

SO GLAD U LIKE IT KARMA (and whoever else plays!!) IT FEELS SO CRAZY TO HAVE BEEN ON THIS JOURNEY W U FOR SO LONG!!!’

[xxxg0ryygurlll13xxx]

i feel kinda bad abt taking my mental health/work day

like yea i get an insane amount of school work but theres ppl i go to school w who have practice, and rehersal and get it done. am i seriously this mentally weak and unstable?? that i get so stressed out and anxious over school i have to take a day to do it cause i cant do my work at school? really???? like i feel idk idk how i feel. i dont think guilty is the right word? but neither is weak? idk. but its bad. theres just so much going on in my family life too that im worried about and i keep trying to tell myself that this is ok and needed and i just have to get the work done but its so hard to not worry and get overanxious to the point i cant go to school. mental health is such a tricky thing and i know its important but i feel so bad when i take care of it. i will say i put on my insta note "needing to stay home from school to do schoolwork is crazy" and like 5 ppl from school have responded saying they do the same thing all the time cause its so necessary. that makes me feel less bad abt taking today off, well not really off im gonna spend my whole day working even tho thats what i did yesterday too after my PSAT and barely made a dent in my planner. its just its so much. so so so so much and i feel bad that other ppl can handle it but i cant. ik ppls brains are built different but how come i struggle so much in school and w school work and others just pass w As and dont even bat an eye???? ig stupid is how it makes me feel. guilty, weak, and stupid. its only october and i feel like im on a sinking ship, i have school to worry abt, loved ones in florida to worry abt, my mas health to worry abt, my health to worry abt, keeping the house at least kinda clean to worry abt, plans to worry abt, social things to worry abt, so much to worry abt. also slightly unrelated but i have a dr appt to go to on saturday and get to skip out on helping w open house at my school and trying to explain to my friend why no she wouldnt rather spend her saturday talking w her mothers spinal surgeon about how she could be paralyzed for the rest of her life, or how her back conditions could kill her. id rather work open house but she insisted i was "lucky" to miss out. i just feel so overwhelmed already. its only october and my mental health is already at such an edge that i cant go to school. ik that going where i go will be good in the long run and the adults around me are constantly telling me that but idk if its worth it since who knows if ill even make it to the long run. they keep insisting that too. ignoring my mental health concerns and just saying that i go to such a good school and my diploma will help me much more than if i went to public school. which is all tru but it shouldnt be at the cost of my mental, and physical health. they say itll make college easier but if this is supposed to prep me for college idk if i can make it another 4 years of this.

im not happy anymore. not long term anyways like sure hoco was fun and i was happy, i was happy getting ready and dancing but as soon as it ended i wasnt happy anymore. i was back to my now usual empty kind of sadness. i watch shows, play games, and make art that usually makes me happy and it doesnt anymore. i stopped drawing for pleasure, only watch shows and yt series to get it over with and havent touched any games in a long time. nothings fun anymore. everyone is so happy, going to parties, hanging out, having fun but here i am practically drowning trying to even crack a smile. ive started just doing the bare minimum for myself to survive. school, sleep, eating, showers basic things. ive abandoned most of my hobbies and ik thats not good for me but i just cant bring myself to do them. i wanna be happy and i dont want ppl ik to worry so i just kinda fake it hoping no one will notice and maybe i can make other ppl happy. im lonely, sad, anxious, guilty, depressed. i should be excited abt things but everything feels like an obligation now. im just trying to go abt life trying not to die and thats pretty much it.

[strawberryseeded]

just watched maxxxine 2024 w my sis.. i wasnt expecting much bc i havent heard absolutely anything abt the movie since it came out, but tbh i was still disappointed considering i rly liked the other 2 movies from the series (x 2022 and pearl 2022). p much everything abt the movie was lackluster, from the setting and vibes to the characters, plot, and even maxine's own character arc. some gory scenes were nice, but not all of them, and they were few to begin with.. tbh it didnt even feel like an horror movie, it was honestly more of a detective/crime movie so even the genre was off

my biggest complain its that it wasnt scary at all. it didnt even make me feel tense.. :/ like dont get me wrong i wanted maxine to survive, i like her character (tho thats mostly cos i know her from x 2022. maxxxine 2023 wasnt rly good at showing her best attributes), but the stakes werent that well presented imo.

edit!! alsoooo (SPOILERS) its like they couldnt pick what theme to rly focus on???

1st we got her trauma as a massacre survivor (from x 2022): her survivor guilt, her overly defensive/ paranoid attitude (that, sidenote, was justified in the movie bc of the stalker situation), her will to make it all worth it. this was present, especially at the beggining, but BARELY (the knife alley guy scene was nice (but, again, not scary) and the mask mold making scene was actually good but the scenario was so fuckin dumb....... who leaves someone alone like that while they have all that covering their face??? the person could be claustrophobic? they could freak out, faint. if not, someone could go wrong anyways. they could be allergic, the substance could get into their nose or mouth and make them choke?? like seriously no one would leave you alone in that situation. AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE MASK'S PURPOSE. they didnt even need one for that scene!!!!!!!! you cant even see from the neck down!!!!!!!)... and then they did Nothing with it. actually Nothing.

then we got maxxxine's past which she run away from: her upbringing which she was grateful for but wasnt gonna make her happy (aka, a star), a father who potentially loved her but didnt accept her, her catholic guilt roots. all that..... so much potential n was so poorly done. the father dude was so not scary not before nor after the reveal (which btw i saw coming from miles ago, not that that was bad). he didnt even feel like maxines father tbh???? he was just some crazy religious dude. it almost came off as if he was delusional and he was the only one who believed maxine was his daughter?? idk the emotional connection between them was srsly lacking.. and yeah maxine shoots him but AFTER that detective lady (super dumb character and "subplot" btw....) shoots him to the ground. it was p much over by the time maxine goes to him and even if she recognizes the impact he had on her when she was a child, its ultimately just words, its not rly impactful bc we see nothing beyond that homemade video. idk.

and finally we got the "i deserve being a star and i will do whatever it takes" angle, which was present the whole time and, again, they did NOTHING with it. actually after havimg watched the teaser/trailer i THOUGHT this was gonna be the angle. like, with pearl 2022 it was abt this country girl that can do nothing but dream abt being a star so when she fails she breaks down and ends up... like that. instead, maxxxine its about a girl who CAN do more than dream about it, who is willing to do anything to get what she wants bc shes a survivor! bc she went thought it all! bc she deserves it! bc she did everything for it! and she succeds! and its horrific and tragic but also you want that for her bc she wants it more than anything and FIGHTS for it! ........but it was none of that. WHICH ITS FINE it didnt have to be that, specifically. but instead, if was not much at all??

[cyanlastride]

the colorado kid has torn through my mind over the past several hours

i was scrolling through tv shows i could watch when i saw haven. my parents watched haven when i was younger, and i remember bits and pieces of it. i was surprised, however, to see stephen king mentioned in the show summary. i read my first king book, the gunslinger, long after my parents finished haven, and before the gunslinger i really had no interest in king. now, even though ive still only read a handful of his books besides the dark tower, i jump every time i see his name, or anything nineteen.

i watched the first episode of haven with intent for the first time, and after something like 6 ad breaks decided that tv was not worth my time. also, though the show was interesting it didnt feel like king, other than it being set in maine. obviously i am no expert of what does and does not feel like king as i swore that donnie darko was a king adaptation when i watched it recently, but whatever. a quick wikipedia search confirms that only the setting and the idea of the colorado kid are king-inspired, along with a couple of references to stuff like IT. still havent read or watched IT. at the end of the day im a dark tower fan, not a king-horror fan, and surprisingly the fanbases have relatively small overlap. anyways, while im on wikipedia, i decide to quickly check out the colorado kid page.

and of course, my eyes immediately spy out the words dark tower.

"The review of The Colorado Kid in today’s issue of today's USA Today mentions that there was no Starbucks in Denver in 1980. Don’t assume that’s a mistake on my part. The constant readers of the Dark Tower series may realize that is not necessarily a continuity error, but a clue."

and just like that, im hooked. you see, im the type of nerd that grinned like a fool when i noticed the name of the bus company in the dr sleep movie. i love finding the little references and connections to the dark tower, so much so that the entire reason why i bought and read fairy tale was because i thought the staircase on the cover looked like the eye of the crimson king. the dark tower reference ending up being much more mundane in that book, but i still enjoyed myself.

so i wasnt able to sleep because i want to find my special little dark tower easter egg just for me oh boy oh boy, and now ive spent at least that last 4 hours starting and finishing the colorado kid which has left me unable to sleep because i cannot stop trying to come up with theories and trying to figure out how the fuck a starbucks existing in denver in 1980 when the first one didnt open there until 1992 on our/kings(?) level of the tower has any fucking relevance to the colorado kid who we already know exists on a different level of the tower to kings level because im assuming the forwards/afterwards are canon like they are in the dark tower books.

also, completely separate to the dark tower relevancy discussion, my main question about the colorado kid is as follows: where the hell did he get the steak from? either my man has been carrying around a cooked steak in his suit all day including into the fish n chip place, or he got it somewhere presumably after the ferry, so on the island? there cant be that many places that serve steak on the island, and with how the setting is described i find it unlikely they wouldnt be able to track down a witness who remembers an out of towner ordering a steak to go. so he was most likely given that steak by someone, someone who knew him well enough to want to give him a steak to eat with his bare fucking hands and then either purposefully doesnt speak up when he is found dead or never finds out about his death. im also willing to bet that the mysterious steak-bearing stranger saw and moved the colorado kid after he choked, because seriously if you were sitting enjoying some steak on the beach cuddled up with a trashcan one why are you rawdogging your steak next to a trashcan two when you start choking are you not going to attempt to stand, or lean over, perhaps over the trashcan, to attempt to choke out your steakbit? let gravity do some of the work, and right into the appropriate receptacle no less? like seriously my man mustve been going through something when he started choking on his steak he just sat there chilling, completely unbothered. if he was in any normal "ohgodhelpmeimchokingtodeath" position when he died he shouldve been face first in the sand. so yeah the colorado kid one hundred percent met with someone who gave him a steak, watched him choke on it, and then sat him up against a trashcan and just left.

maybe it was one of the furries or vampires or whatever. they were having some sort of fancy dinner when jake and callahan showed up, right? was that steak or human? also i seem to remember their little "come watch the humans fuck up their world lol hehe 9/11" teleport door hallway having something to do with russian currency, not sure what the connection is there but my brain seems to think theres something.

last thoughts before i give up for the night: not bothering to factcheck this but i think the dark tower series was completed in 04 and this book's afterward was dated 05 so the whole of the tower is potential context here. also the stand is one of the few other king books ive read and i think boulder colorado is important there too? its either the target city for the good survivors or the place where the sheriff comes from, i think? or maybe its the city the katet passes through in wizard and glass? i dont remember anymore my memory is awful and its late. if the kid ever went todash we at least know he started and ended on the same level of the tower cuz of his wife. the starbucks thing is bothering me too, like why is it significant that hes on another level of the tower, and one thats so similar to our own like they have starbucks during the cold war but with the way they talk about airplane regulations im assuming 9/11 still happened so it cant be that different. im starting to think that king just said that to turn people who were miffed about colorado kid onto the dark tower to increase sales or something but he posted this on his blahag so like i really doubt that.

im boutta pass out, damn you king, damn you colorado kid

[llimerrence]

So, quick review of wish.

spoiler free review: i rate it a 6/10. worth a watch. not a rewatch. soundtrack do be bomb. and i kinda wanna take the star concept art and make an oc off it. The main take away from the movie: stop filling your movies with nothing but easter eggs.

It was just a snow white retelling. Music good. A lot of awkward lines in the beginning, it got better once asha and magnifico were like clear enemies. music so good. too many references and easter eggs to the point where it was distracting and took away from the concept. like i was actively rolling my eyes because it wasnt fun to find them anymore by like minute 20. it was just more and more and more--like the little time table for animation in her drawings? cute! him saying "mirror mirror on the wall" obnoxious! no seriously, that was just a snow white retelling wtf. it would've probably been better recieved if they branded it as such tbh. like a new age snow white retelling. what if instead of internal looks we judged ourselves based on our internal goals. wow. edgy. neat. cool. fun. 2023 re-dos of potentionally problematic stories in a new lens (kinda like the mean girl movie from my understanding)

felt like someone took the storyboards of tangled, frozen, moana and snow white and just rearanged them to make the story? Like, there were so many exact scenes from those movies. Moana copies mostly.

anyway, asha is a terrible protag and never realized she was actively being selfish. she didn't grow at all in the movie. and magnifico was a terrible villian until he was taken over by the dark magic and became the next magic mirror. seriously, i cant tell if that was supposed to just be a (not)clever nod or part of the lore??? like does that change the lore of snow white?? is the evil queen only evil because she is being like controlled by the dark magic like magnifico was???? Like it attached to that dark part of her?? is that what this movie is saying?????????

also, fucking wild that the DISNEY movie was like "no, there is no coming back. there is NO happy ending." like wtf dude what was thaaaaaaat they trapped him in the mirror ??? ABEULA DIDNT EVEN GET TOLD TO FUCK OFF BUT MAGNIFICO GOT GLASSED FOR EVER???

[fraener]

9/15/23

each day i get a little closer to happiness and freedom again and notice by looking back how unhappy ive been. my hearts been reaching for anything lately, ive felt stagnant in my relationship and in a lot of ways unseen...i think ive been incredibly bored and lonely for a long time now. this was one of the worst years ive had in a while for so many reasons, but ive been wondering the last few days why on earth i saw fit to let myself get so isolated. i felt at the time i was making every effort to prevent that but i felt crushed by the weight of being treated poorly by people i used to spend time with and just sort of feeling closed off from h. been nearly a year and i still feel closed off. it becomes more pronounced when were out but he often seemingly ruefully squirrels himself away in a corner and watches me talk to other people but doesnt try and participate himself. theres that arrogant kind of shyness that i hate so much again. the expectation that the only kind of social interaction worth keeping up is if someone goes out of their way to engage with you and keeps doing so even if you arent engaging with them. im especially gregarious in most situations so i normally dont notice when people are treating me that way, but i dont like seeing it so close to home. we had a tiff recently because i started hanging out with o again where h actually did hurt me a little and it broke my heart. it took so much to get under his shell enough for him to admit why he was treating me so poorly and it really came to light hed benefit a lot from therapy i think. ive been having a not affair with my coworker where weve been spending sort of questionable time together, feels like romance but we dont ever touch. last time we went out really felt like a date which was nice but hes married so on some level we arent able to enjoy each others company too much. its been scratching an itch for me to have a lot of similarity and humor with someone again, and to learn new things about someone and argue with someone and play. last night he wasnt there at the show but i had such an incredible time talking with everyone and it scratched the very same itch...k came for a visit and i re-met some people from p's birthday party that i really enjoyed talking to. my heart felt so full seeing everyone and there felt like so much possibility before me. it felt like i was coming home to a village after being gone a long time. i dont want to go back where i was this year, i wanna go home to the dark pews and puppeteers and string instruments and laughter and stolen glances and what little magic this place has to offer. what a terrible year it was! i think ill start going to the honky tonk again and spending a lot more time with s and p and j. i really think the big thing missing for me was going to shows with people i like and just being in big group merriment in general. not sure how much longer things will go on with h, he hasnt been kissing me lately and i cant tell if its because i told him i needed space or because of something else. hes been kind of touchy though and the thing where each of you are being sarcastic is being taken seriously because theres something not being talked about under there is starting to happen a lot. i cant tell how much more lonely ill be if we break up. might be the same but probably much worse. i love h but i feel like i dont know where he is and feels very far away, and maybe has felt that way the whole time. i think i thought wed get along better by now. schools starting up again in one week so ill see what happens i guess. i feel ready for change though, in a much bigger and more settled way than i have all year. whatever comes will come and that will be that.

[moodboardsbysarah]

the hypocrisy and lack of self awareness exhibited by 99% of straight women is unbearable. How they pretend they aren’t competing with you when they so obviously are. How they pretend they have a personality worth respecting when there is next to zero evidence of this so called personality and they reduce themselves to their appearance and their fun experiences on a daily basis. I need a girlfriend who can admit to the competitive aspects of human nature that are going to impact our friendship. I need a girlfriend who can acknowledge how women’s choice to just be pretty and rely on men actually makes us worse people if we fall for the scam. We must be able to have discussions about life and these unpleasant truths… that is what will make us intimate. I expect this of any friend.

My straight girlfriends have to be so self aware in order to not feel threatened by me and ruin our friendship. That’s been my experience with almost every straight woman I’ve been close to. Either they’ve felt threatened by me and taken it out on me because they saw themselves in dumb ass behavior I was ranting about (even tho it wasnt personally directed at them)… or they have been party girls who haven’t wanted to have the deep convos I require any true friend to have with me, because that’s not positive vibes enough and we need to go out and have fun and that’s all that matters in life.

In general I think straight women are fucked. because having the option to coast off of male attention and male freebies your whole life so long as you’re pretty and you let yourself be objectified, truly does fuck with your psyche and erode your ego and your personality and your whole substance as a human being. I say this as a straight female myself who has had to resist the temptation to try and coast off my prettiness and thus turn myself into another dime a dozen NPC woman who wonders why no one takes her seriously or sees her as a full person, when it is she who refuses to act like one.

Most straight women want to have their cake and eat it too which is why they’re so fucked. They expect the respect an adult is given yet remain mentally infantile, refusing to build themselves into fully grown adults because they always feel entitled to fall back onto the privileges of being female that men offer them when life gets hard. so long as they stroke said men’s egos, forego their self respect and play a little bit dumb and submissive. I understand exactly why straight women do this and have even done it myself. Why wouldn’t you stroke some dudes ego and shrink yourself a bit, if it means he will stand in front of you and die for you? If it means he will go to work every day and provide for you? You are the ultimate winner. That’s why straight women have been letting men do what they do to us for millennia.

But seriously don’t expect people to respect you if you never develop the strength to defend yourself and die for yourself. And don’t expect the dude you’re surrendering yourself to, to be infallible. He can let you down and many dudes do let women down so it is best to rely on yourself instead of forever stunting your growth because you know that HYPOTHETICALLY, some moid is out there waiting to make life easy for you if you bat your pretty eyes and uwu at him. You may never find him and even if you do find him, it will make you a person of actual character to build yourself up into someone who doesn’t need him. Sadly though, straight women will watch as men’s fake adoration for us turns into fear, competitiveness, malignant aggression and disgust, when we do develop character and grow into full adults and they realize we don’t need them.

Yes there’s exceptions to this “straight women are either jealous af, vacuous af, or both” and they know who they are. They’re my friends. And the friends I haven’t met yet.

[theoncomingdoo-dah]

series 7

here goes

series rating 0/10

Overall Doctor Rating 3/10

Barely any episodes were worth the watch. The bad episodes were terrible.

I'm in actual tears because this is character assassination.

I love the Doctor. I love them so much. I want to immerse myself in this canon as much as I can. I can't wait to go back to Classic Who since it was so charming and I just *love* the Doctor.

But what Moffat did to 11 and what he could've been, was atrocious. When Matt said goodbye, I started bawling. Because he never actually got to be a *good* Doctor.

And Clara was just there. Like he barely acknowledged her. 11 just mugged to camera for his speech before giving his "mother in law" bedroom eyes.

Clara meant nothing to him at the moment...that's tragic. Honestly.

And the theme from Rings of Ahketen (whatever) played like it was some grand moment. But it wasnt...

When 10 regenerated and Vale Decem plays with the motif that has existed since the beginning of RTD Era, it hits HARD.

While the rendition of The Long Song plays in 11s regeneration, it's beautiful but it's also hollow.

What did 11 do to deserve that song? That departure?

And apparently he wasn't over Amy, could've fooled me because he never mentioned her to Clara or anybody.

Best episode:

no. just no. none of these episodes are worth it.

Most Surprising Episode:

Day of the Doctor. It was SO MUCH WORSE than I thought it would be.

Most Disappointing:

DAY OF THE DOCTOR. I could just post links of better breakdowns than i could give because I'll just reiterate how tired I am.

Worst:

Time of the Doctor. Yeah. Not just because it was bad and had some of the STUPIDEST plot points and asspulls, but because it was the death of 11 and all possibility of him being a good Doctor. 11 had potential. MATT had potential. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE FUCKING CHARACTERS HAD POTENTIAL.

OUT OF 11S ERA

Best: Vincent and The Doctor.

Nothing tops it. It wasn't written by Moffat and it will be the best out of his run. It is an emotional and beautiful episode and has some of the best Amy characterization. The ending (not just the 'scene' everyone knows, is what gets me) When 11 is holding onto Amy for dear life and talking about the "good days and bad days"; it feels so genuine. Amazing episode. Not the best out of Nuwho, but the best of 11s era.

Worst: The Wedding of River Song

Nope. Not even Day of The Doctor tops how AWFUL this one is. Awkward writing, TERRIBLE romance plot line, STUPID STAKES and just River. Just River. I cannot stand what she is and represents and her stupid writing and everything about her UGHHHH I TRIED to like her. I TRIED. I know I'm bias but when you have the FUCKING MASTERCLASS that is The Doctor and Rose and you downgrade to THIS?!? I can't! I just can't take it seriously!

RTD FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, FUCK THIS PLOT LINE UP. Moffat will make you sleep on the couch, BUT FUCKING DO IT.

Destroy the essence of this STUPID PLOT LINE. OBLITERATE IT.

I'm tired. I'm tired from crying and screaming and just being so passionate about a STUPID BRITISH SCI-FI SHOW. That I used to adore and cherish, and got to watch a showrunner who obviously hates what he's writing for fuck EVERYTHING UP. Even the things that he did right in RTD Era (like the Angels), he fucked up.

I despise Steven Moffat as a person and a writer.

12 is next. And I'm so scared. My partner and I are taking a break from the show for a bit. But dont worry, ill be back and im still going through the rewatch. (Long Game notes/review sometime this week, promise!)

I want to love Peter. I want to love the Doctor again. Please let me love something, Moffat. Please. I don't like hating this show.

now for the love of God, someone link me a good elevenrose fic that's nice and fluffy and well written so i don't have to cry myself to sleep.

[yowwsoi]

Another set of thoughts that I couldn't tell you cos you might be sick of my long ass messages

I'm blaming myself for all the shortcomings that I wasn't able to change while I was with you. Had I done something to make it right, it would have not led to anything this bad. And that if I had only come sooner, when you asked for November... I just wished I did. I wished I came sooner that time. Who knows? Maybe we could have saved the crumbling relationship. Maybe we had tried together that time. Maybe I could have changed your mind.

To be honest, I don't know if I'll ever move on from you. The idea of loving another the way I loved you pains me. To be vulnerable and open to another and watch them give up on me eventually, the way you did, terrifies me. But the thing is, you weren't a bad person. You were the silliest, strongest, loving and beautiful woman I've ever met. You showed me that my black and white world could be colorful. I didn't believe in love when I met you. Yes, we were young, and we basically grew together. I had only seen the toxic and ugly side of love with some couples like the ones we see in movies, and sometimes when my parents fight on something that isn't worth it - but when I met you, everything changed. You showed me the beautiful side of love. Truth, we have only grown mature during the latter years of the relationship. You showed me the beautiful side of love.. You healed all the broken parts of me. You may not know it but its true. I did not believe that a love this strong exists when we realized that we are a couple. That we arent just friends/best friends. And as weird as it sounds, I just always knew that I loved you. That time I was lost, that time when you had to endure the pain of me giving my attention to someone else - whether it be friends or potential affairs (which I didn't take seriously, tbh). You changed my views in love. You taught me how to be mature. The idea of 'home' was a dream to me, something I longed to feel. When we spent most of our times together, you eventually became my home. My safe place, a place where I could let my guard down and just breathe. You were the only person I would run to with every problem in my life and you were there with open arms and no judgment. We helped each other thrive, we built each other up.. and I wouldnt want it any other way. To be honest, I would rather fix things with you a million times than start new with someone else. The idea of moving on now pains me. My heart is not ready, I am not ready, I will never be ready. I don't know how to push our memories aside. Maybe it just wasnt our time and I've learned you can't force it to be. The way I looked at you yesterday when we had another fight even though you just came to deliver my laptop.. you despise me and my presence. I will never forget that look, that shout, the anger and pain in your eyes. I understand.. things just didnt work out. I am just forcing myself to see things differently as I believe we can always change for the better. I wish things had turned out differently because everything was so great for a while.. remember that time when we enjoyed our broke CDO moments together? Those times when we traveled on the bus, you often feel like puking but you are hesitant to do so cause there was no bag, so instead you swallowed it lol. All those times we spent just going anywhere around our tiny city, or even those lazy days we spent at home just lying in bed and carefree, not caring about the future or anything, just enjoying each others' company? It's too bad life isnt like that, things like that never last. I had a great time with you, great years even.. and even though things didn't turn out well, I don't regret any second of it.

Now I know you have heard this a million times, but I mean it.. but I'll just show it instead of these words.. cant even send you this cos you might tell me Im a talkshit.

You will forever be my favorite chapter in my book.. But I just gotta let you go as much as it kills me, that I have to walk away now. If our love is as strong as we believed it to be, then we will meet again in the future. But as you said, that is something I should not cling on. I will always be here... cheering you on and praying that you are safe, happy, and achieving your dreams. Thanks for everything, my bibingko. I am glad I was there for you when you needed me. For sure... I will miss you, so bad. Where's the good in goodbye? Goodbye my love... and thank you so much for the opportunity of letting me into your life for the past 12 years... I'm glad I married my bestfriend, the love of my life, the only one.. Wouldn't want it to be anyone else, but we have to move forward. Everything is just so unfortunate right now.. but thank you. Thank you. I love you... more than anything in this world.