#like my chest just gives up. and i'm capable of being made guilty even when i'm honest about this too

[senseless-blabbering]

kinda really sucks that i've been made to feel so obnoxious and wrong that i just can't really talk about anything myself unless i'm asked something

[surielstea]

Cancelled Plans

Based on this request.

Pairing: Modern!Azriel x Fem!Reader

Summary: In an attempt to get over her foolish crush on her roommate Azriel, Reader schedules a date with someone else but Azriel gets awfully clingy when she tries to leave.

Warnings: Smut | minors dni | fingering | teasing | oral (f receiving) | answering a call while receiving oral so semi public (?) | jealous Az

5.1k words

My dazzling black dress looked as if it was made for me specifically. The way it hugged every dip and curve, flared in all the right places. It was beyond just flattering, it made me look angelic yet sinful at the same time.

I spot Azriel on the couch when I enter the sitting room, his long legs stretched out in front of him as he reads from a novel with a worn cover that I've seen him reread a multitude of times.

He flicks his eyes up from his overused book to glance at me, then returns to his page. Then he visibly freezes and looks back to me, needing a double take to make sure what he saw registered correctly. He snapped his book shut when I flashed him a beaming smile.

"Where are you going?" He immediately interrogated, sitting up from his position.

I do a small twirl, showing off. "I have a date," I shrug and he stands, brows lowered. It was always hard to read my roommate's expressions but he had clearly been distraught at the information I gave him. "What? Don't think I'm capable of having anyone interested in me?" I joke and he narrows his eyes at me conspicuously.

"Just confused as to who you think deserves to see you dressed like this," His eyes rake down my figure, dropping all the way to my heels that wrapped up my ankles, slowly moving up the slit in the side of the dress that exposed most of my thigh, my waist, my chest, lingering at the cleavage there for a moment, then finally back up to my eyes.

"It's none of your business," I cross my arms and he tilts his head, unimpressed. I swore he could read me like the pages of his favorite book. "Okay fine," I fold beneath his piercing gaze. "I'm going to dinner with a guy named Nelm and he's super nice so don't—" He doesn't let me finish as he cuts me off with a sudden laugh and I flush in embarrassment. "He's nice, Az," I defend while he suppresses the rest of his laugh, resulting in a thin-lipped smile.

"Nelm cannot be a real name," He says like he refused to even fathom the idea of it.

"Well it is, and I'm going to be late so if you'll excuse me," I spin on my heel, away from him and towards the front door.

"You promised yesterday we'd watch a horror movie tonight," He croons in a sing-song tone that makes me cast a glance back to him with a guilty frown.

"I'll be back later tonight, we'll watch it then," I say, reaching for the doorknob but being mentally stopped by the feeling of something being lost. "Forgetting something?" Azriel hums, holding up my purse, the strap dangling from his finger tauntingly. I groaned, looking at the male.

"Give it." I sigh.

"Try and take it," He shrugs, holding the purse up above his head while taking three long strides forward and closing the distance between us. I look up at him with cold eyes which he only smiles at whilst I silently curse his tall height.

"Az, c'mon I'm going to be late," I claim and he only smirks at the idea.

"Late to what?" Cassian's familiar voice asks from the other side of the room and I jump, looking past Azriel and to my other roommate who was coming down the hallway shirtless, Nesta beside him, appearing to be wearing nothing but his stolen shirt. She practically lived here as much as the rest of us so I didn't bat an eye at the sharp-featured female.

"Great, let's get everyone involved in my love life," I murmur sarcastically while Azriel turns sideways to face both me and his brother.

"She's going on a date with some guy named Nelm," He explains and I glare up at him.

"Horrible name," Nesta mumbles as she enters the kitchen, Cassian trailing behind her.

"He's making it sound worse than it is," I claim and Azriel looks down at me pointedly.

"I only told them what you told me, it's your mind making it seem worse than it is," Azriel retorts and I clamp my mouth shut, knowing he was right.

"Well he's kind, and he's taking me to dinner," I look to Cassian and Nesta like I was someone on trial and they were the jury. "And I'm going to be late, so give me my purse," I take my gaze back to Azriel.

"I don't want to," He shrugs. We pause for a moment at the heaviness that sentence holds. Earlier he had made a taunting game of it, but now he simply just didn’t want me to leave, not for fun, but because he wanted me to stay and watch a stupid scary movie with him.

I was trying to get over him with this date, move on from my ridiculous crush and he was making it awfully difficult. It didn't help that we've made out a couple of times in a few desperate moments while we were both at our lows. But it was never more than lips, always just kissing, we made that line clear and we've both been walking along it for too long.

Nevertheless, my crush wasn't going away, and having it on my roommate of all people was not fun, especially when I saw him walk around shirtless, or roaming the house after showering with a towel loosely wrapped around his hips, hair still dripping water down onto his abdomen—

"How'd you even meet this guy anyway?" Cassian tore me from my straying imagination. Azriel and I both whip our heads towards him.

"Mor set us up," I shrug with a bashful expression.

"Oh," Cassian grimaced, Azriel matching his look of disgust.

"What?" I scowl at both of them, confused as to what's so wrong with that.

"Well Mor playing Cupid is similar to her solstice presents," Cassian attempts to explain.

"She means well, but the outcome is always, laughable," Azriel expands and I frown, looking to the floor in slight defeat, wondering how I would tear myself from this one. I huff and look back at the two males.

"Well he's not laughable, and it's just one date. I think I'll manage," I argue, waving Cassian off. Nesta pulls at his arm and he nods, following her back down the hall.

"Right, good luck then," He calls back and I smile in triumph, bringing my gaze back up to Azriel.

He stares down at me for a moment, mirroring my stubbornness with his pointed look.

"Alright, fine," He sighs, lowering my purse and placing it in my outstretched hands with a tentativeness I nearly didn't catch.

"Thank you," I reach for the doorknob, but I turn back to him for a moment before opening the door, my eyes lingering on pools of hazel.

"Have fun," He shoos and I offer him a grateful smile. "I'm sorry I made you late to dinner with your dad," He added beneath his breath and my smile dropped into a glare.

"It's a date, Azriel. I have a date," I restate but his smirk doesn't falter.

He looks to the door behind me, to my hand on the knob, then back to my eyes, as if anticipating my leave, but I didn't make the move. To be honest I'd much rather stay here and watch that horror movie I promised him than go to dinner with a guy named Nelm.

"Right, a date," He nods, crossing his arms, still waiting for me to take my departure.

"I know the concept of asking a girl out is foreign to you, but I think you can grasp it," I taunt and he chuckles, the amused sound making my stomach flip.

"I know how to ask a girl out," He claims and I smirk, because perhaps prodding his fragile ego was much more fun than any old dinner date.

"I don't believe you," My hand leaves the doorknob only to cross my arms over my chest and his smile widens.

"Yeah?" He leans against the door, indicating that I won't be leaving any time soon now that his weight is pressed against it. I nod. "Do you want to get dinner with me instead of a guy named Nelm?" He tilted his head and I swallowed thickly. Was he genuinely asking me out or just continuing this game I started? "Or we could watch that movie you promised me?" He proposed and my cheeks flushed pink.

"Yes," I blurt out and his brows raise a fraction in both shock and amusement. Gods this was embarrassing.

"Yes to dinner, or to the movie?" He tilts his head, his smirk widening.

"Would you think less of me if I blew off my date just to watch a horror movie with you?" I say, my voice just above a whisper.

"Never." He grabs my hand and pulls me away from the front door, towards the couch.

"Wait I have to change." I pull away from his grasp.

"But you look pretty," He grabs my purse, holding me back from leaving yet again.

"But I'm uncomfortable," I groan but he only tugs at my purse and pulls me closer.

"Just take it off, I won't watch," He closes his eyes and turns his head away from me.

"I'm not stripping down just because you're clingy," I huff and he opens one eye, looking at me with a scrunched nose, his stubbornness outmatched.

"Here." He grabs the hem of his shirt and takes it off with ease, leaving his chest bare.

"You can wear mine," He tosses the fabric at me. I sigh and place the shirt down on the couch.

"All because you want to see me naked," I mumble, dropping my hold on the purse and he sets himself on the couch, closing his eyes just as he promised.

I turn around anyway, unzipping my dress from the side and shrugging it off, allowing it to dip from my shoulders and then pool at the floor.

"Uh, can you hand me your shirt," I murmur, afraid to turn around.

"You were going to let a guy named Nelm see you in that?" He said and I whirled around, staring at him with wide eyes.

"You said you'd shut your eyes!" I grab the shirt in his hands.

"Forget the dress, no one deserves to see you in this," He ignored my exclamation and grabbed me by the backs of my thighs, and pulled me closer, staring up at me in my black lingerie that fit me just as well as my dress.

"You weren't going to let some other guy see you in this were you?" He questions with a certain possessiveness to his voice as I shrug the shirt on, pulling it over my head. Then down past my hips.

"Why does it matter? I'm not going anymore anyways." I plop on the couch beside him, crossing my arms over my chest defensively.

"No," He smiles. "You're not."

"Just start the movie." I swing my feet over his lap and he does as says, letting the TV play while dimming the lights.

I still felt exposed despite Azriel’s shirt loosely around my body. Gods, it smelt so strongly of him, and now he was left shirtless and it made me helpless.

I reached over and grabbed a blanket from the armrest, spreading it out over me while readjusting so I was lying down, my thighs now on Azriel's lap.

"You seem comfortable," He remarks, his tone clipped and I look at him with a glare, still upset he made me cancel my date. "Oh c'mon, you can't be mad at me forever," He sighs, leaning down so his bare chest was pressed to my back. "I know how much you love to cuddle," He croons, using my own weaknesses against me. "Besides, who's going to protect you when all the jump scares start to happen?" He suggests and a shiver ran down my spine at the thought.

I hated horror movies, Azriel always made me watch them since they were his favorite. The sadistic freak laughed whenever I jolted at a scary moment.

I pout, burrowing deeper into the throw pillow.

"Fine, but only if you cuddle me too," I offer and he smiles, laying down fully behind me, our legs tangling as his hand snakes around my waist and pulls me further into his chest. I smile at the feeling. How was I ever supposed to get over him while he was actively pressing me into him while I wore his shirt?

I distracted myself with the movie, but it was hard not to think about him while he stroked the side of my waist with his thumb, silently soothing me during tense parts of the movie.

I was in the middle of imaging how good it'd feel to lose the barrier of the shirt and have skin to skin contact when the killer appeared on screen all of a sudden and I jumped, my entire body tensing as I grabbed his hand that was tucked beneath my head and put it in front of my eyes.

"You're alright," He whispers, a slight amusement to his tone that reassured me. "You're fine," He hums, intertwining my hand with his and pulling them away from my line of sight.

I shiver at the feeling of his hand clasped in mine, how intimate it was in such a quiet moment like this. "You cold?" He asks his lips just beside my ear with the position we were in. I nod, using that as my excuse. "Yeah?" He purrs and I swallow thickly, clenching my legs together at all the lewd thoughts developing in my mind at the single word. I needed help.

I nod again and his hand on my waist dipped down beneath the blanket. I stopped breathing for a minute as he slipped his hand beneath the hem of my shirt, his palm rubbing up the side of my stomach, then returning to gripping my waist with his large, warm hand. "Better?" He whispers and I swore that time I could feel his lips against my ear. I fight back my need to mount him and simply nod instead.

"Mhm," I murmur, tightening my grip on his other hand.

Now that I could feel every twitch and movement of his hand I couldn't think of anything else. The movie didn't even scare me anymore, I was too entranced with him to focus on anything else. I wanted him to feel me everywhere. His calloused fingertips brushed against my soft skin, creating a friction I couldn't erase from my mind. I slowly grab his wrist with my free hand and boldly guide his grip upward, his fingers coming to my breast and cupping it in his hand.

He doesn't say anything, stays perfectly quiet as he gropes my breast in his hand and I let out a soft sigh, my hand in his tightening at the satisfying feeling.

He begins to massage my clothed breast in his hand, with little hesitation in his movements with the action and I respond to his touch by leaning into his chest, the curve of my ass pressing to his hips. He dips his head down, his lips meeting the crook of my shoulder.

His kisses trail up my neck then back down as quiet, soft sounds escape from the base of my throat and I prayed he couldn't hear them. His hand leaves my breast and mortification dawns over me. He was going to pull away, going to call me stupid for having a crush on him since he was my roommate.

But he didn't pull away and he still didn't speak. He just continued to lower his hand until it slipped beneath the blankets, and ever so slowly cupped my heat. I let out a soft gasp, clenching my legs shut.

"This alright love?" He purrs into the shell of my ear and I nod.

"Please," I mutter and he smiles into my neck at the desperation in my tone. He rubs his fingers through my folds, the cloth of my underwear doing nothing to keep his hands dry as my arousal seeps through and soaks him anyway. I clench around nothing at the sensation, his finger pads finding my clit and circling it harshly. I flip onto my back, looking up at him with pleading eyes and gripping his free hand with mine.

He smiles down at me, slowly pressing his fingers to my most sensitive area. "Please, Az," I murmur.

"Please what?" He taunts and I pout, not wanting to say it. But he doesn't waver.

"I want your fingers," I confess. "Inside of me, please Az," I finished and his smirk widened, leaning down and capturing my lips with his.

"Look at how nice you asked, was that so hard?" He hummed and I shook my head no. He grants me a smile as his fingers hook under my waistband and he tugs my panties off, bringing them down to my knees and I thrash them the rest of the way off.

He cups my bare heat in his hand and my breath hitched. He presses his lips to mine again. He could feel how much I wanted him I was so wet. "Az," I sigh out softly as his thumb pressed to my clit. I grind down onto his palm, needing more friction. He meets my silent request by beginning to dive two of his fingers through my folds, coating them in my slick and preparing them for entrance.

I let out a breathy mewl as he flicks his thumb over my clit in a particularly stimulating way, making my legs fall open wider. He admired this, humming against my lips and slipping his tongue inside as I opened my mouth to moan his name.

His fingers slowly come down to my entrance, tracing it dauntingly and I stifle a whine, needing him to fill me entirely. I kissed him hard instead of begging, allowing him to explore every expanse of my mouth as he ever so slowly pushed two of his fingers into my slit. I clenched around him at the feeling, how godly it felt when he rubbed against my elastic walls, stretching them on his hand as he began curling his fingers at just the right angle, pressing against that sensitive bundle of nerves nestled deep inside of me.

"There," I clench his other hand in mine, my nails digging into the back of his palm as he continues the lethal movements. I grit my teeth at how damned perfect it felt as he began to speed up, scissoring his fingers against it and creating an entirely new feeling.

Heat washed over me in waves, ebbing and flowing against me as my orgasm built, rapidly approaching.

"Azriel," I whimpered against his lips and he smirked.

"I love hearing my name moaned from your lips," He admitted, his fingers continuing to make a mess of me. "My pretty girl," He admired, his gaze finding mine. My brows creased at the name, and the possession that came with it.

"Yours," I whispered and he nodded, confirming it.

"All mine." He kissed my lips once more, his hand continuing its relentless pace as he flicked his fingers over that bundle, toying with it as I desperately chased my release.

His thumb returned to my clit, rubbing it harshly and I mewled, pulling away from his lips in favor of tilting my head back into the pillow, reveling in the heat running through my veins. "M'close," I warn in a soft tone and he presses a tender kiss to my cheek, then goes down to my jaw with a trail of the same gentleness.

"I know baby, go ahead, make a mess on my hand," He allows and can only obey, anything else would be downright masochistic.

I'm met with a white-hot pleasure that blinded me for longer than a moment, my eyes rolling back as my climax consumes me entirely, bringing both satisfaction and a craving for more simultaneously.

Once my body returns to its reality he removes his fingers from my cunt, now drenched with my dripping arousal. He smiles, bringing his hand up to his lips and licking up the wet expanse of his fingers, gathering my release on his tongue. He groaned as if the taste was revolutionary. "Gods, you're sweeter than I imagined," He confesses and my brows raise slightly.

"Imagined?" I pant out, still wrung from my intense orgasm.

He simply nods, flipping over me so he was settled between my bare thighs. "But I think I need to taste it firsthand," He leans down, pressing a soft kiss to my sternum before beginning his descent, trailing delicate kisses down my stomach as he guides my legs over his shoulders, his head now trapped between my knees.

He rubs up and down my thighs, settling himself between them as he reaches the hood of my clit, dancing his tongue down it and without warning digging the pink muscle into my overstimulated clit.

I gasped, my hands going into his hair, grasping as he began kissing down my folds, soaking the lower half of his face. He wastes no time, eager to feel me writhe against his tongue.

I stare down at him in anticipation and he holds the eye contact. His hazel gaze was intense, so passion-filled that it gave me hope that this was more than just a one-time thing.

"Please," I mutter.

"Keep your eyes on me, alright love?" His breath was hot against my puffy pussy, it had been so distracting that I almost didn't hear what he said. But I nodded.

"Okay," I said shakily and before I knew it he leaned down, his lips meeting my entrance as his tongue entered my cunt with ease from him stretching me out with his fingers previously.

I gasped at the sensation, his tongue expertly flicking inside of me as he forced the impressive length of it inside of me.

"Az," I gripe, arching my back and digging my head into the pillows as I pull at his dark locks. He continues the wicked action against my core despite my thighs clamping around his head. He didn't seem to care if he lost oxygen, all he wanted was to taste me deeper and provide me more pleasure until I was finding release on his tongue alone.

I could barely breathe, my legs jolting as he continued his exquisite torture against my throbbing entrance.

"Azriel, right there—" My words are cut off by the familiar ringing of my phone, and it was easily compared to my alarm because it had taken me out of my dream. He looks up at me from between my thighs, his eyes glinting with devilry.

"Pick it up," He coos, and my brows bunch.

"Are you crazy?" I whisper shout at him as if the phone might understand me.

"For you," He purrs, leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to my clit. I grip the cushion of the couch at the return of pleasure but the incessant ringing continues and it takes me right out of it again. "Pick it up, or I'll stop." He threatens and I glare at him but he's unwavering. I groan, stretching my arm out to the side and grabbing my purse off the coffee table.

I keep my glare pinned on him as I fish my phone out of the side pocket. The screen lights up with Nelm's contact and my eyes widen, I turn the phone towards Azriel, showing him that I could most definitely not pick this call up. He nods encouragingly and I shake my head rapidly, my brows creased. He begins to pull away from between my legs but I wrap my legs around his neck. "Fuck you," I grit out.

"I plan on it." He smirks against my heat while I bring my phone to my ear, and answer the call.

"Hey, what's up?" I try to mask my voice to be as casual as possible, despite my roommate being between my bare legs.

"Where are you? It's half past seven," He said, slightly irked but I was too busy looking down at Azriel to notice.

"Oh no, was our date tonight?" I gasp in faux shock and Azriel smiles, his eyes lighting with what I knew would be a horrible idea.

"Uh, yeah. I texted you yesterday making sure we were still on?" Nelm said through the other line and I gritted my teeth. I'm so fucked.

"Something came up and texting you slipped my mind—" My breath hitched as Azriel's lips joined with my cunt. I look down at him with panic, mouthing 'no' at him but he doesn't listen.

"Are you alright?" He asked and I felt guilty because he genuinely seemed worried for me.

"Oh— I'm fine just," I struggle to come up with an excuse while Azriel was fucking the thoughts out of me with his tongue.

"Just an emergency happ— happened with my, uhm my roommate," I choke out and Azriel just looks up at me innocently, his hands gripping my thighs as he rolls his long tongue inside of me at a certain spot and I have to fight a moan from slipping past my lips.

"Oh, alright well I can stick around for a while if you think you'll be able to make it?" Nelm suggests from the other end of the line and I curse myself for ever leading this poor guy on when I was clearly not ready for any serious relationship while actively living with my crush.

"I'm so sorry but maybe we can reschedule— fuck," My words turn into curses as Azriel bites at my sensitive clit, silently telling me that my chances of going out with anyone but him were never going to happen. He soothes the bite with the flat of his tongue, circling it directly after with tight, rough movements. I arch into his face, writing into the mattress as I fight my moans off.

"That's fine, when are you free?" Nelm asks and I grit my teeth, shoving my head into the pillows.

"Mm, you know what? I'll just, I can text you my schedule and— and gods, I, I'll let you know when I'm free," I voice, my tone coming off all too whiny as I let a few moans slip through.

"Okay, good luck with whatever your roommate's emergency is." He mumbles, a slight sourness to his tone but who wouldn't be upset after someone flaked on them?

"Yeah, thanks— bye," I grit through my teeth and quickly pull the phone from my ear and hang up the phone.

A loud moan immediately escapes from my throat as soon as the phone shuts off. I let it slip from my hand and fall to the floor absentmindedly as Azriel continues his cruel work at my clit.

I grab him by the hair and pull him away from my heat. "Why did you do that to me?" I pant out, my cheeks flushing with humiliation. He only grins, his lips coated in my slick as his dimples make an appearance.

"Had to show him what's mine," He says, his eyes dark as he leans down once more, flicking his tongue through my folds greedily.

"And I hate sharing," He confesses, diving back into my pussy, his lips sealing against my entrance as he continued fucking me with his tongue, flicking it in and out of me, alternating between my clit and entrance creating an overwhelming amount of stimulation. I pull at his hair and he delights in the pain. I clench my legs around him tighter and I didn't even get the chance to warn him before I teeter over that edge and cum on his tongue.

I pant out for air but it's lost on me as my second climax greets me, hitting me much harder than the last and threatening to knock me out. I swore my ears started ringing for a moment as my vision went fuzzy. Pleasure bloomed through me in the most intense way, still buzzing at my fingertips as he pulled away from my cunt and slowly kissed up my stomach, my sternum, my neck, all the way back to my lips and once he got there I regained all of my senses and enough energy to kiss him back.

His hand came up to my jaw, thumb stroking along it with a soft touch like I was the most precious thing in the world. He pulls away, looking down at me with a prideful smirk.

"My pretty girl." He admired and something in his gaze told me this was so much more than just a hookup.

"You were jealous," I say and he smirks, placing a soft kiss on my lips and allowing me to taste myself once more.

"Of course I was," He murmurs, pulling away less than an inch, his nose still brushing against mine. "But can you blame me?" He asked. "I can't just watch the girl I'm in love with go on a date with some asshole named Nelm," He grumbled and I discarded the insult towards the kind man, focusing on his confession. Heat stained my cheeks in slight shock.

"You're in love with me?" I murmur in slight shock and he shakes his head in disbelief.

"Ever since I can remember." He admits and a small smile spreads over my lips. "Sorry, if that scares you." His voice turns soft and I can't help but crumble in his hold.

"No, I'm in love with you too," I say slightly nervously, and dimples grace his features.

"Oh, thank god." He sighs then leans down and presses his lips to mine harshly, holding a level of confidence that wasn't there before.

"Why don't we take this to the bedroom?" He suggests as he pulls away and my grin widens, I wrap my hands around the back of his neck excitedly.

"You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that," I hum, my legs wrapping around his hips.

"I think I have some idea," He says, his hips pressing into mine and at his words, I realize he's referring to his clothed bulge straining against his pants and rubbing against my folds. I flash a devilish smile.

"Then what are you waiting for?"

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[ibijau]

Papa Mia pt2/On AO3

To have a better chance to meet her fathers alone, Nie Fuyun had requested in their invitation that they come a day early. Now that it was the day before her wedding, she regretted not giving herself more time. Since Qinghe was so far North compared to other sects, most guests had arrived in advance, so the Unclean Realm was bustling with activity. Nie Fuyun's in-laws were expected to arrive soon, as well as her friends from the Jin and Lan sects, whom she'd been allowed to invite. On top of all that, Nie Fuyun was supposed to get ready for the following day. 

By mid-morning, Nie Fuyun was exhausted from avoiding everyone she didn't want to see, and nervous to meet the people who did interest her. 

As she paced near the gates, her sect leader, her father, came to check on her. Normally she would have been touched by the attention, but that day she didn't want to see him. If he knew that she'd invited her other fathers, men he had such a complicated history with, he'd be furious. 

“Are you so impatient to greet your father-in-law, Yunyun?” Nie Huaisang teased her. “Most people go out of their way to avoid him, usually.”

“I have to get used to him, zongzhu,” she flatly replied. “I'll live with him now.”

Nie Huaisang shivered with a grimace. 

“How terrible! I wouldn't wish that upon my worst enemy. I hear Yao zongzhu is at their place all the time, too!” He sighed, so dramatically that Nie Fuyun fought a smile. “My poor Yunyun, why did you have to go fool around with boys like that? We'd have kept you here as long as you liked, you know. Were you so impatient to leave us that even the Ouyang sect seemed better than here?”

“You know it's not like that, zongzhu,” Nie Fuyun protested. “I wasn't there for boys, I was there for the Night Hunt. It was a fun one, too, until Zizhen got hurt,” she grumbled. “I hope the Ouyang sect lets me continue hunting…” 

A crooked smile made its way on Nie Huaisang’s face, and he brought up a hand to ruffle Nie Fuyun's hair. An awkward thing to do, when she was a little taller than him, but it made her happy anyway. 

“It's a pity you were so young when my brother died,” Nie Huaisang said. “You two would have gotten along so well. I've sometimes thought if he had lived long enough, he might have ended up adopting you once you were old enough. Then you would have been the next sect leader, and you wouldn't have needed to leave us for some silly boy's home.”

Nie Fuyun's heart twisted painfully in her chest. Sorrow and anger fought inside her. Maybe Nie Mingjue would have done that, maybe not. But Nie Huaisang could have adopted her and be his father openly without ruining his secret, so why hadn't he?

“Zongzhu, you just wish someone else was managing the sect instead of you,” Nie Fuyun scolded him. 

She could be annoyed about that at least, it wouldn’t surprise him. Everyone in the sect knew he’d rather not be there leading them, although they were grateful he still did his best, especially now that they knew what he was capable of.

“Guilty as charged,” Nie Huaisang cheerfully replied. “It's draining, especially on a day like today. I'm so busy, there's so much to do! But I still wanted to take time to check on you. The elders forced my hand and said this marriage was a good thing for you, but I can't say you look too happy about it.”

“Some things have to be done,” Nie Fuyun replied, worried that her other fathers might arrive soon and get her in trouble. “Don't worry about me, I've accepted my fate, zongzhu. Now go back to your duties, or I'll have to scold you for slacking.”

It was a running joke in the sect that the Nie juniors often had to scold their sect leader. Nie Huaisang always found it funny, and encouraged it a little, even though the elders said he shouldn’t let himself be disrespected. But that day he didn't laugh, nor did he make a show of being miserable and abused. Instead he stared at Nie Fuyun with a very intense expression. 

“I'll have to see what I can do, this whole thing is stupid anyway,” he muttered, half talking to himself, before smiling at Nie Fuyun. “Don't worry, Yunyun. Zongzhu will take care of everything!” 

Such a declaration would normally have worried Nie Fuyun. Even if he was doing better these days, nothing good ever came of Nie Huaisang involving himself in anything. But that morning she was too relieved to see him turn away to care what trouble he would be causing for everyone. 

Nie Huaisang left just in time, too. Not long after, four men landed before the gates of the Unclean Realm. Two wore white and flew side by side. A third, dressed in black, was pestering the fourth one, dressed in purple, who looked as if he'd rather not have flown there with the other three. 

Nie Fuyun's possible fathers stood before her. And looking at them, she instantly could tell… 

That she had no idea which one was her true father. 

“Nie guniang, I am pleased to see you again,” Lan Xichen greeted her with a smile that failed to reach his eyes. “How kind of you to welcome guests personally. But shouldn't that duty befall your sect leader today?”

“Various issues have come up, so he can’t be there himself right now,” Nie Fuyun said, offering the lie she’d practised all morning. “He is very sorry about it, and asks that I treat you as honoured guests until he is free.”

“Is he really overwhelmed, or did he change his mind about seeing us?” the man in black asked, who Nie Fuyun guessed had to be Wei Wuxian.

She was a little shocked that he could speak so carelessly about a sect leader, and in the man’s own home, too. Jin Ling and the Lan cousins hadn’t lied about his personality, then.

“Surely this is not appropriate to discuss in the open,” Nie Fuyun stated, in the same scolding tone she used for her sect leader. Most adults would have been offended to be addressed that way, but Wei Wuxian merely grinned, as if insolence amused him. “Honoured guests, please follow me inside, and then I will do my best to answer your questions, if you have any.”

“Sure, lead the way!” Wei Wuxian retorted.

Since he was, strictly speaking, the least important of the four men, Nie Fuyun turned to the other three in a silent question. Jiang Wanyin appeared annoyed by circumstances, but that might have just been his face. Nie Fuyun had heard stories of his temper, and especially what Wei Wuxian’s presence did to that temper, so she did not take it personally.

When none of her possible fathers offered objections, Nie Fuyun led them inside the Unclean Realm, and toward a location she had determined was the safest to talk to them. As they walked, she kept fearing to see Nie Huaisang cross their path, which would get her in terrible trouble, but he must have been truthful about how busy he was preparing things for her wedding. Very soon the five of them arrived before a building and Nie Fuyun invited her possible fathers to go in.

As soon as they entered, their expression changed when they realised they hadn’t been brought to guest rooms, but instead to the armoury. It was not a cheerful place in any sect, but in the Unclean Realm it was always particularly gloomy. Nobody liked to go in unless they had to, and Nie Huaisang in particular was known to avoid the place like the plague, so it was certain he wouldn’t bother them.

“If this is a joke, I’m not sure I like it,” Jiang Wanyin warned her.

“It isn’t a joke at all,” Nie Fuyun replied. “Although I have to admit you might have been… deceived, to a degree. Nie zongzhu… didn’t invite you to this wedding. I did.”

The four men’s reactions could not have been more different. Jiang Wanyin’s face turned as purple as his robes in his anger, while near him Wei Wuxian howled with laughter, as if to him it was a joke after all. Lan Xichen turned pale, and had to lean against a wall, as if he might faint. As for Lan Wangji, one of his eyebrows might have slightly risen in surprise, but Nie Fuyun couldn’t say for sure.

“So why did you bring us here?” Wei Wuxian asked. “Without telling your sect leader, too… Because he doesn't know, right?”

If she had recognised her father among them, Nie Fuyun had a precise plan on what to tell him. Being pragmatic, she had also prepared something in case she felt no instant bond to any of them. 

“Nie zongzhu is someone very dear to me,” she explained, “and I have often felt sorry that he is not on speaking terms with those he once counted as friends. Since a wedding is a time of new beginnings, and Nie zongzhu has been so generous to me, I thought I should do something for him in return and maybe help him reconcile with people dear to him.”

“Is that right?” Wei Wuxian asked with a mischievous smile. “That's your whole, entire reason?” 

“Yes, sir.”

“Hm. Say, how old are you, exactly?” 

“I turn eighteen next month, sir.”

Wei Wuxian grinned. “Yes, that's about what I figured. Interesting, interesting. And Nie zongzhu favours you, hm?” 

Suddenly feeling nervous, Nie Fuyun nodded. She felt immense relief when Lan Xichen stepped forward, looking so shaken that it took the attention away from her. 

“Your intentions are very sweet,” Lan Xichen said in a voice less steady than he must have liked, “but I fear you made a mistake. I know I last parted ways with Nie Huaisang in… less than amicable terms, and I fear the same can be said of all of us.”

He looked so shaken that Nie Fuyun might have pitied him, had she not read tear stained entries in her father's diary. Lan Xichen deserved no pity from her. Since she did not reply to him, Lan Xichen turned to the other men, but found no help there. 

“Lan Da-ge, I don't know what you're talking about,” Wei Wuxian said with a grin. “There is no hostility between Nie zongzhu and me, even if I wouldn't push it to the point of saying we're friends. Maybe the girl is right, and it's time for second chances. I sure wouldn't mind that.”

“Our situations are different,” Lan Xichen stated with a smile that, while apparently gentle, managed to express he thought Wei Wuxian was an idiot. 

“What, that business two years ago? Well, I'm not fully happy about it, that's certain, but maybe it's time to see if we can all get over it.”

“Wei gongzi is very skilled at getting over things,” Lan Xichen conceded. “Others are not so talented. Besides, this is not the only issue. If I had not thought Nie Huaisang had invited me in a spirit of forgiveness, I would not have come here. Although I dearly wish to speak with him, I have no right to initiate that conversation. Jiang zongzhu, you have had some disagreements with Nie zongzhu too, what do you think of this?”

“I think my situation is again different from both of yours,” Jiang Wanyin replied. “I was wondering why Nie Huaisang had bothered sending me two invitations, and why both letters were so different. The mystery is now solved, and unlike you three, I'm still invited.”

Nie Fuyun winced. She hadn't expected sect leader Nie to invite any of them, but that had been a mistake on her part. After all Jin Ling was invited, but since his life had been endangered several times in the events two years prior, it was possible his uncle would have come to keep an eye on him, with or without invitation. It made sense for sect leader Nie to act as if he had control over that, she should have guessed it. 

“I'm staying too,” Wei Wuxian announced. “Nie zongzhu always has the best wine, and this is a most special occasion, he's going to bring out the good stuff. Lan Zhan, I won't force you to stay. If you want to keep your brother company on the way home, I'll understand.” 

Lan Wangji showed no emotion whatsoever, and yet both his husband and his brother reacted as if he'd started crying over such a cruel decision. 

“Lan Zhan, I promise I wouldn't stay away too long!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed, throwing himself at Lan Wangji's neck. 

So Jin Ling hadn't lied about that either. The Yiling Patriarch was truly shameless, worse behaved than even people of Nie Fuyun's age! But before she could comment on that, Lan Xichen spoke again. 

“I see how things are,” he sighed. “I'll stay until I have seen Nie zongzhu to check if he will talk to me, then leave. And leave alone unless we're all kicked out,” he added, looking at his brother with a thin smile. “If you're allowed, stay and enjoy yourself, Wangji.”

Against her will, Nie Fuyun was a little touched by Lan Xichen's willingness to stay in spite of that uncomfortable situation. It really was too bad that he'd behaved in such a rakish manner in the past, or she would have wished for him to get the closure he sought. 

But all this was a problem for later. Although she had managed to avoid a lot of things for the sake of her plan, it was still the day before her wedding, and her absence would soon be noticed. 

“I have to go and deal with a few things now,” she told the men who each had one chance in four of being her father. Or maybe one in three. “I know it's a lot to ask, but please stay here until I come back. I'll prepare Nie zongzhu for your presence, but he can't see you without warning or he'll be upset!”

“We'll be good,” Wei Wuxian swore, raising three fingers, but his grin promised only mischief and chaos. 

[tia-amorosa]

Sunset Died - Bunch Family

Final connection

While Judy and Victoria are spending time together, Lisa has also arrived at VJ's house. Again, it took a while for the door to open, because he had just taken a nap on the sofa. Once she was in the house, she immediately took the little something out of her pocket that her mother had given her and put it on the table in front of him. “Um… where did you get that??”.

Lisa told him what had happened before she went to him. That her mother had slipped her something and whispered in her ear that they should be careful with it and not mess it up “You really got that from your mother? Since when… o.k., I'd rather not know… phew”. Lisa had to smile a little, she had the impression that he was perhaps a little overwhelmed at that moment.

Her gaze went to him while he was still staring at the condom on the table. Then he inhaled and exhaled deeply, barely audibly. “Do you… I mean, now that it's there…"/ ‘Hmm… Do you want to?’ VJ stroked his chest nervously. ”Well… if I'm honest, I'm not really in the mood for it yet. I… caught a rabbit earlier and broke its neck with a stick"/ ‘Oh, that's tragic, really’/ ‘Huh? Hello, where's my Girlfriend who loves animals more than anything?’/ ‘I guess… she stayed outside the door’. (😏)

He looked at her and had to grin slightly at her statement. But then he saw something in her eyes that wasn't there before. She turned to him and put her arms around his neck. “Do you really have a guilty conscience now because you killed the little bunny or… Are you scared now? Where's my bad boy?”. She kissed him gently and looked at him intently. Then it was clear to him that she didn't want to take another step back. “hn…he only exists in this house"/ „well then…“.

When you're that young, you have certain ideas about how things might go the first time. But in the end, things usually turn out differently than you had imagined. Nevertheless, you were careful enough and kept giving the other person a sign to let them know that certain things were okay. “Today you can undress me completely, hnhn”. Lisa had fun teasing him a little.

VJ was happy to play along with her little games. But then he looked at her for a moment longer. “What… What is it? Don't you want more?"/ ”I want so many things, Lisa. But what I don't want is to stay here forever. I'd love to run away with you. But we can't get away from here.” . VJ often talked about freedom when the two of them were alone in a conversation. And she could clearly see this longing for freedom in his face at that moment. She tilted her head a little and stroked his face “then let's… make the best of it until that's possible, babe… OK?”.

This answer seemed to be enough for VJ for the time being. He knew that he could rely on her word. But at this moment, he didn't want to think about the past or the future, just about the here and now. . And so the bad boy finally had the opportunity to show another side of himself. A gentle, sensual one. She knew he was capable of it. And she knew what it looked like inside him. He's not always as strong as he pretends to be. Everyone has their weak moments. And Lisa was his strength and weakness at the same time.

While they were still in the process of providing protection, they thought back to the lessons for a moment… Back at school… When these wooden structures resembling male genitals stood on the table. The pupils were supposed to practise the correct use of a condom on them. Some of the young people had a red head and perhaps even made jokes about it. In practice, the whole thing looks a little different. You're nervous and worried that you might do something wrong. But with mutual trust, you can be successful together.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later. Lisa was back home in time for dinner. “Oh, hello, I thought you'd come home a bit later”. Lisa smiled and shook her head. Then she looked at the food already on the table. “It's gotten cold. I think your soup is just the thing right now”. Judy gave her a grateful smile. “Mhm. are you all right otherwise?” Lisa knew what her mother seemed to be getting at. But she just shrugged her shoulders with a smile and let out a quiet happy “hmhm”.

The family enjoyed the warm soup that Judy had brought to the table today. It was also one of the things they had discussed with Victoria. They wanted to make sure that everyone here had enough supplies for the winter. And above all: warm meals.

A successful Sunday comes to an end. First and foremost for Judy, because she has managed to jump over her own shadow. Together with Victoria and a few others, she will ensure that everyone has a reasonably warm home over the next few days. And Lisa… She smiled to herself a little before going to bed, thinking about her pleasant afternoon.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of this Part

@greenplumbboblover 😊🙂

Note: I'm not lying when I say that I dreamt about them last night... They were out and about, it was early evening and VJ had a rather harsh tone and asked her to hurry up. I have no idea where they were going... hmm... That's how it is when the mind is intensely occupied with certain things, it wants to tell us something... A premonition? Or a suggestion?... We'll have to find out for ourselves.😉

[moving-to-dreamwinged]

cw// vent below the cut!

no outright triggering content mentioned but references to trauma/ptsd (this is vaguely selfship related i promise snjkfhfndsj).

LONG, sorry . beware! but i've been trying to examine myself a little more closely lately and i just got carried away ig

i sort of always feel like i'm alone in this, i guess i was wondering if anyone else feels the same way in any capacity?

so i've always been a really naturally creative person; when i was younger i was the kid that was always doodling all over their assignments; i would win art and writing contests, stuff like that. it's a lot of artists and imaginative ppl on here specially in the selfship community, so i'm sure y'all will understand this, but being "creative" was kind of literally my entire identity growing up. i preferred fiction to reality and never understood how to get along with the other kids, so it became my escape , whether i was creating or consuming media. it was , in entirety, who i was.

except when i got a little older, i went through a traumatic event. i won't get into specifics, but i was diagnosed with ptsd among other things. and i pretty much blocked it all out! only recently, years later, have i started to realize the effects the trauma actually had on me.

i noticed that my creativity is basically GONE. i'm unable to come up with plotlines in my head; only when i'm very strictly guided by a pre-determined objective or assignment requirement. when i was younger i could write elaborate fantasy storylines with dragons n shit, fully fleshed out character archetypes and interactions, but now it's like my mind is a total fucking blank. NOTHING comes up. especially dialogue; i'm just not capable of imagining it. art is the same way.

it's honestly insane. i don't even remember what it was like to have natural imagination. i miss it more than anything and i feel like i've lost something intensely important. not to mention how ingrained it was in my identity. it's all i was, yet it all stopped after i experienced trauma.

i feel so alone, and it really ties into my relationship with self-shipping. as much comfort as self-shipping brings me, i feel so very invalidated by the fact that i'm not able to create or write content for my ship. i try, but i just can't do it in the end. i see others that make these beautiful drawings or these deep meaningful fanfics and i feel so guilty. like i'm less dedicated, and it makes my relationship/my account less valid, not only to myself but to everyone else. my f/o deserves more than that, but i can't give it to them. in real life, they'd probably be with someone else who could instead. yk that sort of thing :'( it's a whole rabbit hole of thinking that i'll just cut off now but yeah u get the point. super guilty.

i could go on with this for hours but it's already super long. but yeah. the original intention of this blog was for me to try writing again but in a way that was comfortable and safe for me, by combining it w my biggest coping mechanism LOL. i've made some baby steps in my drafts but we'll see how it goes ig. just wanted to get this off my chest and see if maybe anyone else has had a similar experience, idk it just makes me feel so guilty and like i'm a fraud of myself in general :'3

[slytherbun]

confession

pairing: jay halstead x reader

summary: you find yourself in some trouble while clearing a location with your partner jay.

word count: 2.8k

tags: @specialagentsoftie @fighterkimburgess @everythingaddictxx

note: different kind of pd fic then i'm used to but hope y'all like it! ☺

"we're eight minutes out. don't go in yet." voight said into the mic but you and jay had already entered a second too late.

jay's been your partner for almost a year now. the one he had before you was a blonde named hailey that took a position from the fbi.

when you first met him it was about a month after the previous detective left and you could tell he was obviously still in denial. you gave him space and only input your opinion about cases you worked on with intelligence.

it took about three weeks until he actually said anything besides the occasional comment. and he knew deep down that you weren't trying to replace her. but since you were together a lot during the week—jay couldn't help but make his own conclusion about you.

he started to open up more when he looked past the stubbornness after concluding that you were a decent person. for a moment there, you could have sworn he was having an out of body experience with how nice he started treating you.

jay started to invite you out to drinks on a periodic basis. he wanted to explore the possibilities of having you as his permanent partner. one night after a couple of drinks, jay was in a good mood and showed you a picture of his old partner.

the two of them were standing in front of their new work truck with bright smiles on their faces. he talked about her a lot after that night as a way of meeting you half-way. and by the end of that month—it was as if you physically knew her and who she was as a person.

the both of you hit it off pretty well and became friends. even as far as, having drinks every tuesday and thursday after work at molly's—the firefighter owned bar.

jay mumbled a curse at the order voight gave but it was already too late. "get behind me." he spoke in a hushed whisper. not wanting to argue in that particular moment you did as told.

detective halstead had his gun raised and in a firm grip around his fingers before stepping further into the house. you followed his position and warily stepped more into the creaky house.

luckily the both of you had vests already on and around your chests. the material easily gave you a visual view of his arm muscles around the freckles splayed across his biceps.

right away you spotted the cans of spray paint sitting on the concrete living room floors. crude words were traced along the four walls and you couldn't help but scrunch your nose at the horrid smell.

it only had you raising your pistol higher.

while you glanced around to survey the room closely, you couldn't help but notice the gang symbols that you were familiar with. due to the cpd database you knew at least three different affiliations drawn over the wood boarded windows.

the overused drug house looked like something out of a horror movie.

"clear." he grunted between paced cautious breaths and you continued to walk behind his careful steps around the garbage to venture into the main hallway of the house.

jay stopped at the entryway and you turned back around to double check the area once again while he scanned the front view where you and he needed to go.

both sides of the hallway were clear but he made sure his gun was raised and followed every inch of the hallway space that he inspected.

you felt a tap on your waist and turned back around to see jay was still facing forward. he probably hadn't noticed the spot he touched of your body but it still sent shivers down your spine with the intimacy of it.

but you pushed away the anxiousness to check and see what was bothering jay. the only thought you should be having right now is how to get out of the dangerous position.

the hallway was full of open and vulnerable space. a clear point of range that could be taken advantage of to take either you or jay out at any time.

jay was concerned for you. he couldn't help the anxious feeling that he had in the pit of his stomach. the unknowingness ahead in the crack house irked him greatly that he couldn’t predict what was about to happen.

the walls of the hallway smelled highly metallic and if that hadn't given it away, the walls were filled with fresh blood splatter. you gulped at the sight of the bright red handprints going down the length of the hall and glanced at jay from the corner of your eye with an eyebrow raised.

he sighed and nodded his head while pointing his gun to the left to signal the continuance of moving on. you bit the bottom of your lip and tipped your head to let him know you were ready to go.

turning your body in a three hundred sixty angle, you watched his back and felt the hairs on the back of your neck lift up in a static gesture. you could also feel goosebumps all over your arms and you just wanted to hurry up and get out of there.

it was truly the most awful scene you've ever been to. with everything you had—you kept yourself together and calm. your lips were in a straight line the whole time.

you should have known with the uneasy feeling that things were going wrong within a split second. and you were right because after jay turned just slightly he felt a gun being pressed against his forehead.

“put your guns down or else i’m going to blow his head off.” an angered voice said into the echoey hall.

not believing what was happening, you turned your body to survey the area and another man came into your view and held his gun higher. “‘tsk tsk’ miss. hand me that gun or else we’re going to have problems.” jay sighed from behind you and you rolled your eyes.

“i’m not putting down shit until you tell me your demands.” you said maybe a little too cockily but it was protocol.

voight had told the team plenty of times to stall and not give up your gun at first. in hopes that the other’s would show up and it would become a better outcome if you just continued talking to the person who was a threat.

a third one appeared and now you were officially outnumbered but you were still hoping they were dumber than they looked. the one that was pressing a firearm to your partner’s temple spit out, “listen lady. you either put your weapon down or else his brain matter will be just another body that was paved across the walls of this house.”

you tried to calculate in your head quickly if you should take the risk of surrendering. voight said they were eight minutes out. and if you’ve been in the house for almost four minutes now.

that was half the time left until they were going to show but then those few precious minutes would be enough time for literally anything.

sometimes you hated being a part of the police force. how could you ever know the correct answer and outcome within a split second of your life? could anybody be capable of that? whatever choice you decided to take would be the outcome.

you knew you wouldn’t be able to live without jay as your partner and in your life. and his blood would be on your hands if you didn’t surrender now. a shaky breath fell past your lips when you clicked the safety back on and handed it to one of them.

of course they used your gun against you and headbutted you with it. little black spots were in your vision before it completely knocked you out. you just hoped the intelligence team would be able to find you and jay.

it would be your fault and you’d feel guilty until your last breath if they didn’t.

you weren’t sure how much time had passed but a hard slap against your cheek woke you up. a blood trail still continued to trickle down your forehead and you winced at the feeling of an awful beating in your eardrums. “wake up sleeping bitch.”

you tried to speak but instead you coughed at the buildup in your throat. not being able to help yourself, in a snarky tone you replied. “i thought it was sleeping beauty?” that earned you another slap that ensured fingerprints across your cheek but you weren’t feeling any regret about it.

“now shut up and answer my next question.” he inputted before you could interrupt again. you looked at him with a devious grin and he rolled his eyes in annoyance. “what were you looking for in that house?”

when you leaned forward, you realized the reason why you couldn’t move was because your arms were tied behind your back. but nonetheless you leaned forward encroaching in his space enough to feel his breath span out against your red cheek.

“as if i’d tell you.” your defiance had him pushing your head back forcefully so you hit the concrete behind you, feeling as if a baseball bat hit your skull.

he smirked at your uncomfort. “perhaps a little visit with your boyfriend will help you come to understand that i don’t mess around. if you don’t give me an answer—my boys won’t hesitate to put a bullet straight through his head.” your only reply was a silent one.

spitting blood onto his shoes and he cursed before grinning again. “yeah that’s what i thought.” turning his head towards the door, he yelled. “bring the pretty boy in!”

your shoulders immediately dropped when they entered the room. the other two men from earlier were dragging jay into the room and disposed of his body roughly on the ground in front of you. if it weren’t for his chest rising up and down faintly then you would have thought he was dead.

both of his eyes were already swollen and you knew he would have two black eyes for weeks, dried blood dripped down his face and you didn’t even want to look at the rest of his body. despite the fact he was wearing clothes, you knew he had many internal problems that would need only the care a hospital could provide.

“j-jay?” you stuttered at the sight of him.

he kept blacking out and struggled to stay awake. jay had been counting his breaths to make sure he had enough air circulating through his body. cracked ribs were no joke and he could only groan to let his favorite person know that he was still holding on.

“you think beating people is the only answer? violence?” you glanced around the room and glared at the three with a venomous look. they shared similar smiles hearing how hoarse your voice was.

“i hope my team finds you all and you rot!” the two that brought jay in walked away and the one that talked to you a few moments ago stood and looked down at you. saying one more thing before walking out the door and shutting it. “and i hope next time i come in here—you’ll feel more generous and tell me what you were up to. if you don’t then our pretty boy here will die as promised.”

as soon as he left the room, you started rubbing your arms up and down the wall in hopes that the binds around your wrists would break off. “y/n.” jay mumbled. you didn’t even notice he had turned his face and you shushed him. “don’t open your eyes jay. it’ll be okay, i promise.”

he tried again. “y-y/n. i need to t-tell you something.” jay’s lip was busted and bruised. he hissed at the pain. “you don’t need to tell me anything. we’re getting out of here, detective halstead.” you stated with confidence and continued to run your hands up and down despite the sting of your wrists.

jay had a feeling earlier this morning that something bad would happen. his gut had told him something and he wished he hadn’t ignored it. but he can’t always follow everything, especially when they didn’t even have their case yet. but of course after finding out the hard way, this case was bad.

he knew it and it still put you in harm's way but jay had to tell you how he felt just in case it did go the way he was hoping it wouldn’t. “i don’t care if i need to keep my strength right now. listen to me please.” he pleaded and you finally stopped, turning to glance at his face.

jay was squinting and the visual of his state had your stomach churning.

“y/n i haven’t been completely honest with you and i need to tell you this. i’ve wanted to for a while now, but i just couldn’t find the right moment to.” it was getting to the point where you were desperately trying to keep together. and now that he wanted to confess a deep secret that he’s held close to his chest, the whole thing just had you hysterical.

jay frowned when you started laughing. he tried to scoot closer but the pain he felt was significant. it was just one of those situations where it wasn’t an appropriate response but you couldn’t help yourself either.

he noticed the tears falling down your cheeks while watching you quiet down. a reaction like this didn’t surprise your partner so he didn’t blame your outburst in the least. “i’m s-sorry. i’m sorry.” you muttered and tilted your head to both sides.

you looked back over to jay after successfully wiping more than half of the tears on your sleeve. and for a moment he just gazed into your eyes with his blue ones. a look that you couldn’t decipher nor describe appeared across his face but he seemed to snap out of whatever he was thinking.

jay cleared his throat and continued with what he was about to say earlier. “it’s okay y/n. but i need you to know that i don’t blame you in the slightest for what went down in that house. i would have done the same exact thing because i love you.”

it was like time stopped and you couldn’t speak even if you wanted to. after all of that time you spent with jay. him wanting nothing to do with you, then becoming your acquaintance, somewhat of a real friend and he loved you?

“you really love me?” you questioned. not being able to believe what was coming out of his mouth. you wondered if the three men drugged him and he was high or delusional. a grunt came out his mouth at the current aching pain he felt all over his body.

“yes y/n, i love you so much. if i could, i’d be over there right now and giving you a hug. then i’d lean down and give you a kiss that i’ve been wanting to give you for months now.”

that honesty from him had you laughing, “months? me too. i’ve wanted to kiss you for almost the whole year that i’ve known you.” you replied with the same amount of honesty he had given you.

“yeah, y/n. it’s probably going to be a year soon but i meant what i said. i really do love you and i’m sorry we’re in the situation that we’re in now. i wish i could protect you from this.” before you could reply the two of you heard gunshots outside of the room. “shit! i hope that’s them.” you mumbled and jay nodded as best as he could.

the door banged open and hit the wall. you almost peed your pants with how happy you were to see kevin and adam surveying the room. “clear!” kevin announced and then walked over to you and jay. adam spoke into the radio, “5021 ida. we have officers down and need two ambos rolled to our location.”

after kevin ripped the binds from your wrists, you crawled over to jay even though your arms were killing you. another tear fell down your cheek when you got up and close to him. he looked awful but now that the two of you were safe, he could begin to heal soon enough. “jay.” he made a ‘hmm’ sound due to the exhaustion he was feeling.

“i love you too.” you finally said and he smiled. you leaned down to brush your lips against his carefully. “after all of this is done. i’m going to give you a proper one.”

you winked and he grinned and responded while the medics rolled in. “we have plenty of time in the world now.”

[giorno-plays-piano]

Vicious

Part II

Pairing: Steve x reader, Bucky x reader, Thor x reader, Loki x reader, Peter x reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, possessiveness, theft, all characters are adults.

Words: 1891.

Part I

Summary: Transferring to Stark Academy that has only allowed to take in female students last semester, you realize you are just one of three young women among hundreds of students. Your things are constantly being stolen, and soon you begin fearing for your safety.

P.S. To avoid any confusion, I changed the name Savages -> Vicious.

________________________

The next day you spent doubting your own decisions. Was it really wise to leave everything to Steve? How could he find those students all by himself and deal with your problem? Could he really stop them from acting like that? You thought once again it would be so much easier to ask for a transfer, but you had already given him your word to meet him today at 5. It would be very inappropriate not to come when he was trying to help you.

When the time came, you were sneaking in the student council room as if you were some petty thief. You were afraid people would start talking: if everybody knew who stole your things, they would understand you came to Steve for help like a little girl. It was embarrassing - even in a situation like this. Besides, somebody could be following you since at 5 pm the academy was almost empty.

By the time you reached the right door, you heart was beating as if you had just run a marathon. You really, really hoped Steve found some solution, and you wouldn’t have to be humiliated by the student advisor for wanting to leave the school.

Opening the door, you saw a couple of students on the sofa and quickly stepped away, afraid the student council was still having a meeting, “Ugh, sorry!”

“Come in, please,” Steve said calmly behind the door, and you shyly got in again, watching four other guys staring at you with interest. “We’ve been waiting for you.”

“What, they too?” You were so perplexed by his words you forgot your manners, speaking of others as if they weren’t in the same room. “I’m sorry, I mean, I didn’t know you were involved.”

Wait, were they the ones who stole your things? Did Steve bring them here for you?

“No need to be so nervous.” One of them, a guy with long, jet black hair forming waves around his shoulders told you, motioning you to come closer and sit in one of the chairs opposing the sofa where he sat. “We’re here to help you.”

You remembered his name was Loki. A mathematic genius, he was considered one of the top students of the academy.

“That’s right! Come, come!” Seeing Peter among others was surprising, but his smiling face made you calm down a little, and you smiled at him in return. 

No, they weren’t those guys who stole your underwear, for sure. Apparently, Steve asked them to join you because they knew something and could give you a hand in finding those bastards.

“Thank you for agreeing to see me.” Feeling a little self-conscious among five different men you'd barely known, you landed on one of the chairs and saw that the other two were Bucky and a captain of the academy’s basketball team, Thor. “Did you find out anything?”

“Yes,” Steve said with a loud sigh, “I know exactly who they are. I can hand them over to the school’s officials and get them expelled by tomorrow, but that’s not the real issue here.”

You felt the chills ran up your back. What did he mean by the real issue?

“Is there something else?”

When you saw Loki smirking at you, you suddenly realized you were among five strong men in the student council room on the fifth floor where most classrooms were already empty. If you screamed, nobody would even hear you.

“Stop it.” Bucky’s angry voice cut through the silence, and you saw him literally burning a hole in Loki’s face. “Don’t make her scared, freak.”

Obviously, he wanted to say something offensive to Barnes in return, but Steve silenced them both with his icy glare. Loki sent him an innocent smile while Bucky snorted and rolled his eyes in irritation. It felt like they were in the middle of some school play, and you bit down on your lower lip, having a feeling something was going horribly wrong.

“The thing is, even if we got those ones expelled, it probably won’t stop the others from doing something similar.” Steve leaned up against a desk with his arms crossed over his chest. “I feel terrible admitting it, but many of our students are completely wild. I’m afraid they might keep harassing you.”

“Oh.”

You averted your eyes, realizing your attempts to find a solution were futile. Obviously, Steve could do nothing - he wasn’t a knight in shining armor, ready to protect you day and night from those delinquents who followed you everywhere. As you thought before, the one thing that could help here was leaving the school for good.

Shit, you didn’t know how to explain it to your family, Even your friends thought it was too bizarre to be true and laughed at your worries, saying you probably lost your things yourself. You would have to find a better excuse for a transfer in the middle of the semester.

“Well, anyway, thank you for trying,” you nodded and smiled apologetically at him as if it were your fault, “tomorrow I will talk to the student advisor about my transfer. Sorry for the trouble!”

“I don’t think it’s real to get transferred by now. It’s passed all the deadlines.” Shaking his head, Bucky raised his voice, and you felt suffocating.

Apparently, you would really have to skip a whole year of school. Explaining everything to your family, looking for some garbage job to have enough money to rent a room and pay your bills... Fantastic.

“You don’t have to do that. I’ve found another way.” 

Immediately, you raised your head, your pupils dilating.

“You see, the reason they are doing that is because you have no one to protect you. They know the administration won’t take it seriously because they’re a bunch of old misogynists, and you also have no means of protecting yourself. It would be better if you started dating someone, someone strong enough to make these guys back down.”

Steve looked deadly serious for someone saying such nonsense. A boyfriend? Now? Was he for real? Did he think you'd be using someone like your personal shield? Besides, even if you chose the strongest guy at school, it didn’t mean he would be stronger if several people attacked him.

But when you shared your thoughts with Steve, you saw others smiling at you as if they knew you would say that, and you felt uneasy.

“That’s true. That’s why you need more than one boyfriend.”

“What do you mean? How can somebody have more than one boyfriend?" Puzzled, you stared at him wide-eyed as if he said something stupid.

What on Earth did he mean by that? Were you to have your own squad of bodyguards at all times while you were in the academy? This was so foolish you couldn't believe someone like Steve said it out loud.

But then you caught glances of five men in the room and forgot how to breathe for a second. They weren't serious, were they? Steve didn't assemble all these guys here to make them into your boyfriends. It was preposterous even thinking of that, right?

Right?

"Please tell me it's not what I think it is." You muttered, crossing your arms over your chest as if trying to protect yourself.

"Why are you being so nervous?" Baring his teeth, Loki smiled at you. "Some other girl would be happy if five men were to be her boyfriends."

"It's a joke, right? You're all joking."

You hoped to see any of them laughing and nodding their heads, saying they simply wanted to cheer you up, but all you saw was a guilty expression on the faces of Bucky and Thor and the excitement of others. They really gathered here to offer you this.

"All of us here," Steve looked upon others, becoming a little displeased when his gaze fell upon smiling Peter, "are perfectly capable of helping you. If each of us were to accompany you one day a week, others won't be so brave. I'm sure they will no longer be a nuisance to you if they know what we can do to them."

There was something very dark in the way Steve said that, and for a couple of seconds you weren't sure whether you have to be more scared of him rather than those who was stealing your things.

"But it would be very uncomfortable for everyone, wouldn't it? I mean, going with me everywhere, not using your own time as you'd like. And, well, surely, others will see that we won't act like a real couple, so they might still keep harassing me. I don't think it would work."

Apparently, Loki was bored with this talk, you thought as you heard him clicking his tongue in annoyance.

"Then don't pretend. Act like a real girlfriend. Kiss in public, hug, go to the cinema together, what else girls do?"

"Wait, you mean, with ALL of you?"

"Yeah? Do you think anyone gonna be against it?"

You very much hoped they would be. Being followed by someone like your bodyguard was one thing, but having a real boyfriend was very different. Did they really want to pretend to be lovey-dovey with you? Act like you were close to them?

Oh. Of course, they would. They belonged to the same kind of touch-starved barbaric men they were trying to protect you from. They would do all those things to you, too.

You realized you were crying only when Peter flew off his seat in a hurry and squatted down beside you, taking your shaking hands in warm his.

"Please, don't cry. Nobody's gonna force you into doing anything, I promise. You will only do things you're comfortable with, ok?" Handing you his pearly white handkerchief, he smiled to comfort you. "No one of us gonna say anything."

"And if she starts dating one of us for real? What's then?" It was Loki again, cocking his head to the side and obviously provoking Peter to yell at him.

"We'll be ok with that, too."

The silence felt heavy. As you opened your eyes, Peter's handkerchief in your hands, you realized it was Thor who spoke for the first time, and the way he looked at you softly made you feel a little better. Despite the fact you knew little of him, for some reason, it felt like you would be safe with him - certainly safer than with Loki.

"Naturally, if any of us will bring you discomfort or do something unacceptable, you need to let us all know, and we'll decide what to do with that person." Raising his voice, the head of the student council made everyone to turn their head to him. "We will be meeting here, in this room, if anything happens. Each of us will give you our phone numbers. We will also make a schedule who accompanies you every day of the week."

It seemed he no longer asked for your opinion if you even wanted it to happen.

__________

"Bucky will be with you on Mondays, Loki on Tuesdays. Wednesdays are Thor's, on Thursdays Peter will be following you, and on Fridays it will be me going with you. Of course, if you need any of us to watch over you on weekends, feel free to contact whoever of us you like more."

Part III

Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin ​@inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @navegandoaciegas @rosalynshields @brattycherub @sllooney @angrythingstarlight @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @stargazingfangirl18 @dillybuggg @literate-lamb @cosicas-cuquis @sarge-barnes-sir @buckybarnesplumwhore @jaysayey @megzdoodle @gotnofucks @lux-ravenwolf @ximebebx @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @sourpatchspinster @biiskuitx @iheartsebandchris @lovelydarkdaydream @soleil-dor @illyrianprincess @vampirestrawberries @stupendouslovegarden

[placeinthemiddleofnowhere]

On the Run

Previous Part | Masterlist | Next Part

On the Run Part 20

Pairing: Bishop Losa x Female!Reader

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, Smut, Stalker ex, Scenes of abuse, Angst, Violence, Death

A/n: I'm back bitches! All charged up from being away and ready to get chapters rolling again. Now the drama's really starting, enjoy everyone, and thank you for the continued support <3

Bishop was looking weary. His eyes were forming bags and there was a permanent dark cloud hanging over his head. Things with the club were stressful and the pressure was mounting from Galindo to find Adelita. That, and Marcus was applying pressure to the club, still trying to discover the mole that sold out the run before the kidnapping.

He trusted you enough to let you know Marcus’ suspicions and made you swear not to mention it to Olivia. Afterall, if it was Angel, Coco and Gilly spearheading things, then you couldn’t risk letting her tell Coco he was on to them. You’d relented, but you were far from happy about it. Sure Angel could be stubborn and he’d butt heads with Bishop, but you didn’t think he was capable of sneaking around Bishop’s back like that, putting the club in harm’s way.

Of course, Olivia would have to face the consequences of Coco’s involvement if it were ever found out. The idea gave you a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach, you didn’t like the idea of Olivia having to face more trauma so soon after the last disaster you were caught up in together. You hoped for everyone’s sakes that they were just being weird because of all the craziness going on, and not because of their direct involvement in it.

You looked up from your coffee, away from the rippling reflections and directed your attention back toward Bishop and his deep frown. He often reminded you of a big grizzly bear these days, growling and grunting all the time with his big puffed out chest. The idea something was going on in his club, under his watch was tearing him apart.

“You know, if you keep looking at your coffee like that it might try to jump out the mug and run away,” you teased.

Bishop’s eyes lit up and he almost had a ghost of a smile on his face. Your little joke wasn’t enough to take the darkness away completely. You sighed and got up from the chair you’d perched on and walked over to him, taking his coffee cup from him and placing it on the counter. You held his big hands in yours and stroked along his calloused knuckles, watching the way his fingers danced at your touch.

“I’m sorry I’ve been like this lately, sweetheart. It’s not fair to you,” he sighed.

You looked up into his big eyes, studying how they melted as you made contact and pressed your forehead to his, trying to impart all of your love on him. Every time you talked about things he always ended up feeling horrendously guilty. He didn’t like that he was being constantly pulled away from you, that even when he was with you his mind was somewhere else.

“It’s ok. I know I keep saying it, but I mean it. It’s ok,” you breathed. “This is out of your control, you can’t help it.”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with all this though. If you were with someone normal you wouldn’t have all this stress and have to be on guard all the time.”

You almost laughed at him saying that. You knew what it was like to truly be stressed and on guard all the time and this wasn’t it. Sure you had to be careful walking around the street and look out for anyone suspicious, but you knew you were safe to come home. You knew that when you got into bed most nights there would be a man to wrap his arms around you tight and tell you he loved you. Not someone waiting to berate you for everything you did wrong that day.

“Bishop I don’t want someone ‘normal’. I love my big grumpy biker man. I love my late night rides and coffee and hearing you shuffle in the door knowing you're gonna roll into bed and warm me up. Besides, we can do normal again when all this is over.”

“I know… I know. I just think you deserve the world and I’m not giving it to you right now.”

“You can give it to me when you’ve got more energy, sweetheart,” you teased, kissing his cheek.

Finally he laughed. His face broke out into a grin as he registered your double meaning, clearly he liked the thought of ‘giving it’ to you. It was true you hadn't had as many chances to be intimate lately, but you knew with everything that was on his mind he wouldn’t be able to keep himself in it long enough to enjoy it. So it was better to wait until you were both present, both in the moment and able to give each other everything you had.

“I’m sure you’re looking forward to that,” he snorted. “God I feel like I’m a hundred years old, I’ve got the weight of the world on me you know?”

“You’re not far off, old man,” you smirked.

“Not helping,” he growled.

You grinned and pulled him away from the counter, putting your hands on his arms and kissing his cheek. At first he watched you curiously, wondering what it was you were doing until you slipped round behind him and rubbed at his shoulders. He groaned low in his throat and you grinned as he melted into you, crumbling under your touch.

“Let’s take some of that weight off, huh? Work those knots out of that big strong back of yours,” you whispered, letting your mouth graze his ear.

He shuddered at your little breaths falling on his neck and rolled his shoulders. You listened out for every little inhale, every little groan and gasp he made as you continued to massage him, working out some of the tension that plagued his body. He really did feel like the weight of the world was on him. He was so tense with stress, you swore he could’ve formed diamonds in that back of his.

“I know you need to go to the clubhouse, but can we sit for a moment? I just want to cuddle a minute,” you begged, wrapping your arms around him and leaning against his back.

“I can do that,” he breathed. “I need to get a shower and go soon, but I can spare a moment.”

Bishop took your hand and led you to the couch, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your neck, breathing in the scent of you. He loved to hold you like this, like you were something delicate that needed to be wrapped up tight and safe. Loved to feel you close and smell that fruity body wash you used. If it wasn’t for Marcus and Galindo constantly breathing down his neck he’d stay all day with you like that. Enjoying the warmth of your body and the the feel of your breath on his skin. Just the thought was enough to calm his heavy heart for a second.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you too, Bishop. Don’t worry about me, keep your head in this Adelita stuff and finish the job. Then you can get back to making me scream the house down and taking me for adventures,” you murmured.

“That sounds so good,” he sighed. “I can get back to what’s important and stop worrying about what Angel’s up to all the time. He should be paying for the amount of space he takes up in my mind these days. If I have to hear any of his shit today I’m gonna put him on the floor, I swear to god.”

“Poor Angel,” you giggled. “You know I bet there’s a good explanation for all the shadiness. He’s probably found a girl and that’s why he’s so weird. It would explain the spring in his step I see sometimes when he comes into the bar.”

“He has a spring in his step?”

“Oh yeah, I catch him sitting and smiling at nothing sometimes, then he gets all embarrassed and tries to look away and pretend he’s all manliness and motor grease.”

“Huh… Something to think about. I’d much rather he’d found some unfortunate girl than find out he's betrayed us,” he said, glaring at the thought of Angel’s disloyalty.

“Angel’s a lot of things. A big, dumb, pervy, asshole sure. He’s not a traitor though. He loves the club. No way he’d do something stupid like work with Adelita, it doesn’t make sense, you know?”

“I hope you’re right. Sweetheart. I pray that you’re right,” he sighed.

You looked up behind you and saw that same tired look cross his face and reached your hand out, stroking his face. The look wasn’t going to stay gone for long, it wouldn’t vanish until he knew his brothers were in the clear and business was back to normal.

Your poor man, trudging around fueled by worry and the few hours of sleep he could scrape after processing through his thoughts for the evening. You didn’t like seeing him this way. Not when you knew what he looked like when you were together out in the woods, sitting by your own little private pool and laughing, cuddling each other. Carefree Bishop felt so far away, you missed him. You hoped more than anything you could coerce him back soon, that the anxiety would fade.

“It’s all gonna be ok, Bish. You’re gonna get the club out of all this mess. And I’m gonna be here for you all through this, we’re all gonna get through it,” you smiled.

And you really did believe that.

-------

You’d had a hard shift at the bar that day, it had been moving painfully slowly. The regulars weren’t being regular and it seemed like the atmosphere was dead enough to suffocate almost everyone that was inside. Danny had realised how dire it was and had given you the rest of the day off so that meant you were free to do whatever you wanted. It was just past three, so that left plenty of time to amuse yourself with.

Your morning with Bishop had been intense and the shift you’d just done had only exasperated you more, even if it had only been a few hours. You figured you just needed some air and maybe a nice cold drink. Then you could hang out with Olivia or something after.

You gave her a call, figuring it couldn’t hurt to make some plans and know what you’d be up to with the rest of your day. It would make the day pass quicker and it would mean that it wasn’t long until you were in Bishop’s arms again. You walked around, taking no particular direction, meandering your way through town. The phone rung for a few moments before Olivia answered, groggily giving you a greeting.

“Hey, what time is it?” She yawned.

“Are you still in bed?” you guffawed.

“Me and Coco were up kinda late last night… He left me like a few hours ago, I thinkI’m still recovering.”

“Jesus. I was gonna ask if you wanted to hang out since Danny let me off early. I’m guessing you’re gonna be too tired?”

“No! I can hang out. Just uh - give me a couple hours and we can order pizza or something, kay?”

“That sounds good, there’s no pressure though, if you wanna sleep-”

“No! I wanna get pizza and gossip about Coco.”

You snorted. It was like talking to someone just out of school sometimes, you’d have thought it was her first time if you didn’t know her well enough. You finished up making your plans to meet later, and decided to keep walking around for a bit until you headed over to hers, the air would do you good afterall.

At one point you stopped for a coke, but other than that you just took yourself off to wherever your feet would allow. You were on autopilot, you spent most of the walk with glazed eyes, mind off in another realm. You didn’t realise you were reaching the outskirts of town. You were too busy thinking about the clouds over Bishop to really see where you were going.

Suddenly you realised all at once, you were almost out in the desert and you were all alone without a car or a weapon. The wind was picking up around you and the dust was flying around your feet, reminding you that you weren’t surrounded by buildings anymore. You needed to go back.

Your heartbeat picked up and you turned around, facing back toward the city and resolving to get back to your place. Now that you had a destination in mind you were hyper focused, pulled out of your thoughts. You didn’t want to wait to find out what sort of unsavory types there might be hanging around there.

Just as you were starting to reach some more familiar ground, that's when you saw that girl that had been appearing seemingly everywhere. You stopped dead in your tracks and eyed her as she sauntered around and frowned. What was she doing all the way out there? What was she doing constantly coming across your path? You stared for a few more seconds before you shook your head. Were You going crazy? Was this girl stalking you or something?

You watched as she preoccupied herself with tracing the cracks in the ground with a stick she'd have found near a lawn. She didn’t notice as you slowly approached, trying to appear as casual as possible as you thought about what to ask her. As you got closer you were more able to clearly see the scar on her cheek and you tilted your head, wondering what had happened to her.

The girl must’ve felt eyes on her because soon her head shot up and you were looking eye to eye. Her face was overtaken by shock and her eyes went wide as saucers. She hadn’t been expecting to see you there, just a stick’s throw away from reach. You panicked too, not knowing what to do now you were just across from her and put your hands up, trying to appear non threatening.

“Hey, I don’t want to hurt you. I just wanna know why you keep appearing everywhere? Where are you coming from?”

“What do you want?” she snapped.

You jumped back, not expecting her response. Fair enough, you thought.

“I keep seeing you all the time, I just wanted to check you’re alright.”

“I’m fine, leave me alone!”

Before you could say another word, she was away running again. She disappeared around the corner, practically leaving a dust trail behind her. You shook your head, well that was the last time you were gonna try and approach her. It seemed like she knew exactly how to handle herself anyways. No point getting mixed up in business that wasn’t yours.

Just as you were deciding to wash your hands of the situation you passed the corner she’d ran around and stopped in shock. There in a sheltered alleyway that no one would think to look into, a scene unfolded before your eyes. At first you thought your mind was tricking you, that you were just imagining things, but no. There was Angel, EZ, Coco and Gilly talking with a woman that you’d only seen in pictures. Adelita. Your jaw dropped as you saw them and just as you were about to take a step back, they turned and saw you there.

All of the men’s eyes went wide and they jumped as they recognised you as well. Adelita looked at them as if to question what was happening, but before any clarifications could take place, you took off running and they ran right after you. You barely took a breath, or looked behind, you booked it down the street.

Next part here

——

Tag list

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[vdlest]

You left something

Characters:

Bucky Barnes x ExAvenger!Reader

Summary:

It has been a year since you left the life of being an Avenger. But after a year, someone showed up in your house, telling you that you left something when you left your old life. What could it be?

Warning:

Swearing

Mention of sex/one night stand

Fluff

Bucky being soft (it's a warning, right?)

One of the best years of your life was being an avenger. You were one of the greatest assets of the team, that's why when you left the team, they had a big loss. It wasn't really your intention to leave the life you had, but when Steve disappeared, Tony and Nat died, you were deeply devastated. You and the rest of Avengers like Sam, Bucky, Wanda, Clint, Bruce, Thor, the Guardians, and Spider-man continued what the original six started. However, one heated argument between you and Bucky made you leave the team — after a mission in Norway, you comforted Bucky when you saw him alone in the roof of the compound, you told him that he shouldn't let sadness take over him and his life, but Bucky didn't liked it. He exploded and told you that instead of Steve, Nat, and Tony, it should have been you who died and disappeared.

The very next day after your argument with Bucky, you left the compound and you just left them a letter, telling them how sorry you were for leaving them. You told them that you are not worthy anymore to be part of them, so you made a sacrifice, leaving the old life you had.

Upon leaving the Avengers, you moved to a small city in California. You started your own farm there and live in a peaceful life, but sometimes you miss being on the team, especially when you see them on the news.

But you had to make a sacrifice. After all, you think you're not worthy enough, not like what Tony, Steve, and Nat has always been telling you.

They're gone, and so is your faith in yourself.

•••

You're in the middle of painting your front porch when you heard someone walking towards you. Your back is facing the front yard of your house, so you don't know if someone's coming or not, but because of your super hearing, you heard that someone is walking behind you.

You got up from painting the base of your porch and turned around to see who was walking towards you.

It's the most unexpected guest you ever had in your entire life — it's the man who made you decide to leave your old life, James Buchanan Barnes.

You avoided his gaze and continue whatever you are doing.

"Y/n," you heard him called you, but you just continue with what you're doing.

"What are you doing here, Barnes?" you asked him without looking at him.

"It took us so long before we could finally trace your actions for the past year. Did you really think we wouldn't find you?" he asked you.

You knew it was Wanda who always wanted to find you. She's your friend. It was you, Nat, and Wanda who had always been friends, but after Nat died and after Wanda disappeared, you lost the only friends you had. Eight months ago, you found out from the news that Wanda came back, more powerful and more capable of helping other people. You knew she wouldn't stop until she found you.

But why is Bucky Barnes who came after you and not Wanda?

"Ever since you left, all of us did everything what we could do to find you, but hell, you are good in hiding. Even Dr. Strange and Wanda cannot find you," Bucky continued talking as he walk closer to you.

You chuckled sarcastically, "Can't you just go straight to the point? Why are you really here?" you put down your paintbrush and faced him, "What do you need from me?"

He took one last step closer to you, "I need you to come back to the team."

The moment you heard him said that, you laughed and walked towards your tool shed. He followed you and you could see how confuse he is when he heard you laugh at him.

"What is so funny?" he asked you.

"You are funny, Barnes," you stopped from opening the door of your tool shed and faced him, "You were the one who wanted me to be out of the team, right? You told me that instead of Nat, Steve, and Tony, it should've been just me who died and disappeared. You remember that?" you asked him, fighting the emotion that is stsrting to build inside you.

He did not answer you and you see guilt in his eyes. But it's already too late for him to feel that way — he already caused you so much pain.

"Why don't you just go back to where you came from and leave me alone? You wanted this right? You wanted me to be gone? So here I am, I've been gone for a year. What else do you need from me?" you asked him.

You resumed in opening the door of your tool shed but before you could finally opened it, you heard him spoke again.

"When you left the team, you left something in there," he said.

You have no idea what he was talking about. When you left the compound, you made sure you got all your things and other belongings. So you have no idea what something you left when you left the compound.

"Me."

You rapidly turned around to face him once again.

"What the hell are you saying?" you asked him unbelievably.

"You left me feeling guilty for what I did and say to you. You left me and I wasn't able to ask for forgiveness for what I did. You left me hanging. And most importantly, you left me wanting you," he said continuously. You did not noticed that in every word he says, he is walking closer to you, and in ever step he does, you move back, but you stopped moving the moment you felt the door of the tool shed behind you, "The night you and I had an argument, I was having a rough time. I didn't know how I could live a life without my best friend, Steve. I wasn't ready to move on, but you kept on telling me to move on."

Your eyes remained on his gaze. You didn't even had the guts to move away or push him away. It seems like you were hypnotized by the way he looks at you and how he caged you between his body and the tool shed's door.

"I didn't mean any word I said that night to you. I don't want you to die or be gone as well. I want you to stay with me until the end."

When you heard him say those words to you, you came back to your senses. You pushed him away and walked away from him. It's not a surprise that he followed you.

"Y/n, I am telling the truth," he said while following you. "I thought I was just feeling guilty the whole time you were gone. Everybody is blaming me for your disappearance, and I thought I was just guilty about the fact that it was really my fault why you left. But no, it's not just about the guilt. It's about the longing I felt when you left."

"Longing?!" you growled as you stop from walking. You turned around and faced him, "You long for the person you wished to die and just disappear?" you scoffed and crossed your arms in front of your chest, "Do you have any idea how painful it is for me to hear those words coming from you? You, of all people, Bucky! You, of all people, said those words to me and made me feel like I'm just a nobody in your life! You made me feel I'm just a fucking whore you fucked once, and that was it! You made me believe that there's something special growing between us, but I was God damn wrong!"

Before you left the compound and the Avengers life, you and Bucky shared a beautiful moment together. You were with him when he visited Yori and apologized for the death of his son. After that, he asked you if you could stay with him for a while and he'll cook dinner for both of you. And so he did, soon after your dinner, you found yourself giving in and kissing him back. You thought it was the start of something beautiful and something deep with him, but after a week, he exploded to you and told you harsh things you never thought you could hear from him.

"I thought we're onto something good, Bucky. But it was just all a fucking thought," you wiped your tears away as soon as you felt them on your cheeks.

"I'm sorry for making you feel that way, y/n," he walked towards you and cupped your face. You wanted to avoid his touch but your body did not oblige to your will, "I was just lost at that time. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I was ready to give my all to you and just lose you. I thought by pushing you away, it would be less complicated for both of us. I can't afford to lose another person in my life. But I still did lose you."

Your tears continue to run down your cheeks as you listen to his words, his explanation.

You told yourself a million times, the next time you'll see him, you'll break his face, his bones. But you couldn't, especially seeing him now this close.

"Everyday, I hated myself for hurting you and letting you leave just like that. Everyday, I am regretting the words I pierced through you. And everyday, I am killing myself for wasting the beautiful start we had," he uses his thumb to wiped your tears away, "I tried my best to find you, to take you back, to apologize, and to have you again by my side, because without you, I am nothing, y/n. And I am not saying these words just because I've made a mistake to you. I am saying these words because I want to have you back in my life."

You looked down, making him remove his hands on your face, "I...I don't know if...if I could trust you again, Bucky."

You were too scared to trust him again, especially with your heart.

"You're asking me to give you my full trust again, Bucky. And it's a big thing to ask from someone who got scared of trusting people again," you said while looking down.

He uses his hand to hold your chin and make you look up to meet his gaze again, "I am willing to do anything to earn your trust again. I am not forcing you to do it right away, but I will earn your trust in every possible way I can," he seems like he was vowing or promising. "But I did not come all the way here just for your trust, y/n."

Your brows furrowed with what he said.

"I also came here to be worthy of your love."

Before you could say anything, he grabbed one of your hands and placed it against his chest, where his heart is.

"Because when you left, you left this one as well," he said referring to his heart.

You imagined countless times that you want Bucky to suffer and feel the pain you felt when you left everything behind because of him. But after a year of hiding your love for him with anger, you finally realized that it wasn't anger at all, it has always been love. Your heart has always been with him. You thought, why make him suffer when you can make him earn what he lost from the times that you've been away from each other — your trust & your love for him.

You hated him because he hurt you, but after hearing his explanation, it all made sense to you.

You are still in love with Bucky Barnes.

-v.dl

[bloodorangesoup]

Work Song | B.B.

Request: Have you ever heard work song by hozier? It gives me such bucky vibes 🥺 like imagine him waking up from a nightmare & singing it to calm him down

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2.05k (this was supposed to be a drabble but I got carried away lol)

Warnings: Slight angst, fluff, bad singing (unless you can actually sing), Bucky being a big softy

My Masterlist

Notes: Anon you need to name yourself cause you obviously have good taste in music and I kinda want some moots on here. This song is so perfect for Bucky. I truly appreciate the suggestion, it gives me inspiration of what to write while procrastinating on works in progress <3

You were awoken when the sheets and comforter were yanked off of you, shocking you awake with the chill of the night air. You squinted your eyes open only to be faced with Bucky’s back as he was sat up in bed. You could see by the rhythmic curling of his spine that he was breathing fast and heavy, prompting you to sit up with him.

“Baby,” you groaned as you stretched your back and faced him, “you alright?”

His eyes stared forward, expressionless, until he snapped out of it and looked at you with a worried face. It was almost as if Bucky hadn’t even noticed you had sat up until he heard your voice. You wanted to kiss in between his eyebrows to smooth the lines that the furrow of them had formed. You leaned towards him and laid your hand on his back, feeling the expansion and deflation of his breathing, it had calmed a bit but you could feel the still rapid beating of his heart. He opened his mouth for a second, hesitating before releasing a breath and answering.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m okay. Sorry I woke you up. There's still a couple hours left before you have to get up, lay back down.” He said, motioning with his head towards your pillow. You simply shook your head and dragged your hand from his back up to his neck and around to his cheek. He leaned his head into your cupped palm, closing his eyes at the comfort your touch gave him.

“Can we cuddle then?” You asked, more for him than you. It was an unspoken declaration in the air of “you’re a terrible liar,” but by now in your relationship, Bucky knew that if he wanted to talk about his nightmares, you were always there and ready to listen. If he didn’t want to talk then you could at least try to get him back to sleep or calm his nerves.

He answered you with a nod. You grabbed his pillow and stacked it on top of your own, giving you a cushion to comfortably lay down with your back slightly elevated. He understood what to do and without hesitation crawled over to you and wrapped his arms around your torso, laying halfway on top of you and resting his cheek on the top of your breast, right over your heart. Both your bodies shifted a few times until they found the perfect interlock with each other, sinking down into the bed.

“Do you remember that song I showed you the other day, the one you said you really liked?” You didn’t know where you were trying to go with this conversation, but you figured that getting him sleepy again would be hard, so talking about whatever came to your head might help put him down. Bucky could feel the vibrations of your voice all throughout your chest. He wished in that moment that the two of you could stay like this forever, that he could feel your sweet voice like this for the rest of his life.

“The “take me to church” one?”

“Yeah, that one. The dude who sings that has another song I really love, it makes me think of you whenever I hear it.”

“What’s it called?” He mumbled weakly. You gave him a squeeze and continued.

“Work Song.”

“Hmm,” Bucky hummed against your chest, waiting a moment before speaking, “could you sing it for me, doll?”

“If you want, but I can’t promise it’ll sound pretty,” you answered with a breathy chuckle. You wanted to comfort Bucky, but you definitely weren’t a singer. It was difficult enough to be in tune with songs, you weren’t sure you could even manage with half his body resting on you.

“It doesn’t have to sound pretty, if you sing it it’ll be perfect. Please?”

It took Bucky a long time to be okay with asking for things and accepting that receiving favors didn’t equate to weakness. You knew that him asking you to do this for him was hard and you weren’t going to let him down.

“Alright.” You cleared your throat and breathed in before exhaling quickly, cutting the words out of your mouth as your brain tried to think of how the song goes.

“Well, it starts with a low piano note and this soft clap, and there's a harmony that goes ‘hmmm, hmm mmm’ and then another clap and ‘hmm mmm’,” you explained, emphasizing every clap with a light tap if your hand on his back. You looked down at him and lifted your other hand, weaving yo fingers through his hair to gently move back and forth over his scalp. You looked back up to the ceiling with your eyes open, imagining how the stars would look if the roof was gone.

“And that part goes on for a bit…” you said into the silence of the room. As you explained, Bucky had shifted his head to rest the underside of his chin flush against your chest and looked up at you. Due to the way your face looked up he couldn’t see it completely, but he could see how the light of the moon pouring into the room cast a glow across your cheekbones and jaw. He watched as you fumbled through the intro, trying to explain to him how the different sounds come together, and he swore you had never looked more beautiful.

He drank in the way the hums of the song rattled under his chin, how you would pause for a few moments trying to think of what came next in the song. He felt your heartbeat against his throat and the rise and fall of your chest with every breath you would take before letting out another hum. He was right, you could be singing any song and it would be perfect.

“And then he starts singing, he goes,” you took in a breath before singing.

“‘Boys, workin' on empty

Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat?

I just think about my baby

I'm so full of love I could barely eat’

“‘There's nothin' sweeter than my baby

I'd never want once from the cherry tree

'Cause my baby's sweet as can be

She give me toothaches just from kissin' me’.”

He noted how the corners of your mouth tilted upward at that last line. You weren’t singing it exactly as the song went, the melody was a bit off and the pitch was much lower than it was supposed to be, but Bucky felt like every word you sang floated out into the world, carrying its refreshing life and coolness into his soul.

“And then there's this really deep bass note that hits and then the chorus goes,

“‘When, my, time comes around

Lay me gently in the cold dark earth

No grave can hold my body down

I'll crawl home to her’.”

Bucky thought of how he always seemed to crawl back to you. For once, he didn’t feel guilty for his presence in your life. He relished in the feeling of having you under him, in the knowledge that of all the people in the world, you would let him crawl home to you. If he had to crawl to someone, he would thank any and all higher powers that it was you.

“And then the song gets lighters and the hums come back,” you mumbled.

“‘Boys, when my baby found me

I was three days on a drunken sin

I woke with her walls around me

Nothin' in her room but an empty crib’

“‘And I was burning up a fever

I didn't care much how long I lived

But I swear, I thought I dreamed her

She never asked me once about the wrong I did’.”

Memories swirled around in Bucky’s head of all the times he felt like ending it all. He knew he was perfectly capable of doing it, but there was always a stubborn sliver of hope splintered in his head that prevented him from going through with anything. He didn’t like to think back to those times, but hearing the words leave your lips made it clear to him that you were the sliver of hope, some force of the universe had kept him around long enough to reach you and hold on. He closed his eyes and listened as you gently worked through the chorus twice more.

“‘My babe would never fret none

About what my hands and my body done

If the Lord don't forgive me

I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me’.”

Bucky’s brows furrowed as he thought of how unconditionally you cared for him. You weren’t blind to the troubles that came with loving someone like him, with accepting what he did and offering him sanctuary from himself. He didn’t know if he would ever be sure of the idea that he deserved love, but he was okay with being selfish if it meant having you by his side.

“‘When I was kissin' on my baby

And she'd put her love down, soft and sweet

In the low lamp light, I was free

Heaven and hell were words to me’.”

Tears had started to well in Bucky’s eyes. He looked up once again at your face, delicately bathed in moonlight, and thought of how he looked in the light, how you both looked together in the light. If you looked so beautiful and lovely, maybe he could too. He didn't feel exposed or ugly, he felt safe, he felt free. He was overwhelmed with emotion. His heart was pounding and he was choked up, he had never felt as completely and dramatically in love with you as he did in that moment.

You wrapped up the song, carrying it out with the same hums and claps that brought it in. Looking down, you saw Bucky’s face buried in the space between your breasts and could hear a sharp intake of breath, indicating that he was crying. You ran your hand that had been tapping his back up and down his spine. You took your hand from his hair and used it to push his disheveled hair out of his eyes and off his forehead, causing him to look up at you.

To Bucky, you looked like an angel. You both laid in silence, looking into each other's eyes, while Bucky simply hugged you closer and let his tears fall freely. You leaned down and placed a few gentle kisses on his forehead. He finally settled his breathing and sniffled a few times before speaking, he was ready to talk.

“I’ve killed enough people,” he sniffled before continuing, his voice croaky, “I’ve killed enough people to give me nightmares for the rest of my life.” He sighed and closed his eyes, feeling too shameful to keep looking at you.

You sank down lower in the sheets and tightened your hold on him, bringing his face and body up and closer to you.

“I’m so sorry, Buck. I wish there was more I could do.” You finally let go of the few tears building in your eyes, letting them roll down your cheeks to the corner of your lips.

“You’re here. You love me. That’s all I need,” he let out with a sob. You nodded your head and tugged on his body, signaling to him to come up.

He shifted himself higher in the bed, his face coming parallel to yours. You snaked your hand around his neck and craned him to look into your eyes. You observed the glassiness of them and how it accentuated the bright blueness within them. You thought of how, even when he was sobbing, he looked more beautiful than ever.

“I love you so much, y/n” he whispered with shaky breaths.

“I love you too, Buck, more than anything.”

You pulled him completely into you, your swollen lips gliding against one another, mixing your salty tears. You brought your hands to the sides of his face, rubbing your thumbs over his cheekbones, feeling how beautiful he was even with your eyes closed. You both pulled back slowly, only far enough to rest your foreheads together.

“I love you.”

[let-them-read-fics]

Blackpink Reaction To Their S/O Surprising Them W/ Dyed Hair

A/N: Hello, my lovely readers! Thank you guys for being patient with me on the requests, I really appreciate it. This is my first time writing a reaction, so let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy. Happy reading, everyone!

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

Everything is under the cut :)

Jisoo

"Say hello to everyone," Jisoo requests through the phone, looking back up to the screen in front of her with that signature smirk playing on her lips. As fate would have it, she was in the middle of doing a live when you called. The fans love you -- especially since you're so funny and chaotic when you're around -- so you're happy to greet them.

"Hi, Blinks! I'll be there in a few minutes with a special surprise." 

Jisoo lets out a shocked noise at this, considering you hadn't told her about your plans. 

"Oye! Hurry home so we can see it." She says excitedly, lightly bouncing up and down on the bed. With a smile that's evident in your voice, you tell her goodbye.

---

In one swift motion, you scoop up a cheery Dalgom in your arms, laughing at how he licks your cheeks in greeting. 

"I love you, too, buddy."

After setting your bag down on the couch, you make your way to Jisoo's room. Little do you know, she has a surprise of her own in store.

"BOO!" She shouts, keeping her phone steady to capture your reaction to the scare. You tense up and shout, nearly dropping Dalgom in the process, but you recover after a moment. Both of you break out into a fit of giggles, and you look over at the computer on the bedside table to find the fans blowing up the chat. Jisoo wipes the tears of laughter from her eyes, and looks at you again; only now does she notice your new hair. 

At first, she's speechless -- only capable of looking at you with hearts in her eyes. Eventually, though, she finds her voice again. "Y/N! Wow, it looks gorgeous!" She smiles, running her hand through the newly dyed locks. Her accent made the compliment even more special, and you don't even try to stop the grin that tugs at your lips. 

---

Now seated on the bed with Jisoo beside you and Dalgom in your lap, you flip your hair around exaggeratedly as you show it to the audience. The positive comments roll in, and you take turns reading some of them out loud. From her position against the headboard, she can see the different hues of your hair shine and shimmer brightly in the gentle lamplight; she can't help but admire you.

After half an hour or so, she decides to end the live. You pull Dalgom into your arms again and smoosh your cheek up against Jisoo's, making sure to crowd in enough to fit into frame. Something must have gotten into her, because she leans around to press a lingering kiss to the corner of your lips, right in front of the camera. You can only imagine how much harder the fans are going to ship you now.

With a final wave and goodbye to everyone, she ends it. She wraps one arm around your back as her other comes to rest on your thigh, reaching up every now and then to pet Dalgom's head. 

"I'm so happy you like it." You say after a few minutes, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen over the room. She lifts her head from its place on your shoulder to look at you. "Of course I do, Y/N. Did you doubt that I would?"

"Not exactly… I was just afraid it might not turn out pretty. You know?" She nods in response, but her heart breaks a little: you have no idea how amazing you are.

"I understand, but you don't ever need to worry about that. Everything about you is beautiful because it's a part of you. You make everything pretty." She gushes, tracing little patterns on your hip. 

You attempt to dismiss her words, throwing a hand into the air while making a little "pshh" sound, but she doesn't stand for it. "I mean it, Y/N. I'm not just saying that. I'm glad to call you mine; you're so special." Her words affect you more than you thought they would, and soon tears are blurring your vision. Who knew dying your hair could lead to all this?

"I don't know what I did to deserve you, Jisoo, but I love you so much. You always know what to say." And it's true -- she does. She knows you get insecure sometimes, and she's always there to reassure you of her feelings when you need it most. 

"And I love you." She affirms, allowing her head to rest on your shoulder again now that you're happy.

Feeling left out, Dalgom lets out a little bark; he wants attention too. In an instant, the room is filled with kissy noises and the sound of your high pitched voices as you both talk to him and shower him with love.

Jennie

"Jen, I'm home!" With a shrug of your shoulders, the warm material of your coat falls down your arms. As you hang it on the rack beside the door, a smile tugs at your lips; Jennie gave you that coat, and it's always done well in keeping you warm and comfortable when she can't be around to do so. You make a mental note to thank her properly. 

With that, you amble into the kitchen.

"Yah, jagi! What took so long? I missed you." Jennie whines, her words slipping past the cute little pout that's surely adorning her face. She's preparing a snack at the counter, her back turned to you as she struggles to open the sauce jar. 

"Here, let me help," you offer, approaching her. 

As she hands you the container, she turns to look at you for the first time tonight. Her eyes widen as she does a double take at you. You don't notice, though -- your focus is elsewhere.

"Jisoo and I saw a new gaming store when we were out today and we decided to stop in. We didn't expect to be there for so long; we just got wrapped up." You tell her, answering her previous question as you finally manage to pop the lid open. Upon sliding the jar over to her and meeting her gaze, an instant blush begins to make its way to your cheeks. Her pupils are blown wide now, and her lips are pursed as she appreciates the sight of you. You never fail to send her heart wild.

"I'm convinced you can rock any color," she flirts, smiling widely at the reaction her words garner from you. 

"Why don't you come a little closer and get a better look?" You ask, fighting the shyness that threatens to take over you. She quirks an eyebrow before sauntering over, swiftly moving to tangle her hands in your hair. "It suits you so well, babe." She compliments, toying with the soft strands that fall down into your face as you lean in closer to her. Her embrace is comforting, as always, and you sigh at the feeling of her fingers against your scalp. Before she can stop herself, Jennie leans forward and connects your lips in a sweet kiss. She tastes like fruit, and you can't get enough of the flavor. Working with a sneaking suspicion, you open your eyes and glance over at her work station. Now, with your fears confirmed, you abruptly pull away.

She groans at the loss of contact, but you're quick to speak up. "You made tanghulu without me?? Woooow, Jennie. I'm hurt." You tease, acting truly upset as you take a step away from her. She shakes her head, letting out a little chuckle; for a second, she worried you were upset about something serious.

"Shush, we can always make more." 

You don't drop the act so easily, though, and the playful glint in her eye tells you that she's enjoying the banter. 

"What else have you done without me today? If you watched that new drama without me then you're sleeping on the couch tonight." A guilty expression falls over her features, and she avoids your gaze.

"About that…" she starts, rubbing the back of her neck as a dry chuckle slips past her lips.

"JENNIE KIM!" 

"I'm messing with you, babe. That would be treason." She pulls you into her arms again, raising a hand and giving you a sort of "scout's honor" gesture to prove that she isn't lying. After narrowing your eyes at her one last time to ensure she's being truthful, you give in and kiss her again. 

"Fine. You'll just have to keep kissing me to make up for the tanghulu."

"Oh, really? I'll have to start making it without you more often, then." She laughs against your lips as you pinch her for that remark. Your mood brightens exponentially at the sound of her giggles, and you wrap your arms around her even tighter.

Rosé

“I'm home, my love!" You shout, slipping your shoes off and setting them beside the door. A content sigh leaves your lips as you undo the top few buttons of your shirt, finally able to relax and see Rosé. Her excited footsteps carry out across the house as she makes her way downstairs, Hank following right along. You crouch down to pick him up, smiling at the precious way his ears bounce around as he runs into your arms. 

"Oww, my heart," Rosie exclaims with a grin, holding her hand against her chest in mock pain. Nothing can compare to seeing her two loves so happy and carefree. She pads her way over to you, and you kiss the top of Hank's head before setting him on the ground. Her arms wrap around your waist, and you pull her in for a warm embrace; the two of you stand like that for a minute, swaying back and forth. Eventually she pulls back to press a kiss to your lips -- something she's been dying to do all day -- and she takes your hat off in order to run her hands through your hair. 

"I missed you, babe." The words come out quietly, accompanied by a frown. You peck her lips again until her pout turns into a soft little smile, and rest your forehead against hers. 

"Me too. But now I have the next 3 days off, and I'm all yours." Her eyes look into yours lovingly, but quickly shift to look at your newly exposed hair. 

A sound of surprise stutters past her lips -- you've truly taken her breath away. She has a special twinkle in her eye as she looks at you, completely in love. Her fingers skim across your collarbone and neck as they move to play with your hair. 

"It's beautiful, just like you." You tut at her and bring your hands up to cover your face, taking refuge behind them. She's quick to pull them away, though, pressing a kiss to your knuckles and wrists before interlocking your fingers. 

"I mean it, Y/N. You're always so stunning." There's no denying the effect her words have on you; even after being together for as long as you have, her compliments never fail to set your heart aflame. 

"How'd I get so lucky, huh?" You ask her as you let your hands settle on her hips. She's clad in a crop top and jeans, and the soft skin of her abdomen against your fingertips is a wonderful contrast to the rough material of her pants. 

It's her turn to blush now. "I love you to the mountains and back and to the far far hills--" your giggles interrupt her recital, and she just laughs along with you. "I love you, too, Rose. So much." She presses another kiss to your cheek before leading you up the stairs and calling out for Hank to follow.

Lisa

As you walk down the hallway of the dance studio, destination set on Lisa's rehearsal room, you can hear the strong beat of "Candy" by Doja Cat pulsing inside. A stray staff member passes by you, looking nearly entranced as you run a hand through your hair to readjust it and smile at her. She watches you walk away, incapable of taking her eyes off of you, and that simple act boosts your confidence tenfold. You had been a little nervous to see how people would react to your new look -- Lisa, in particular -- but all of the approval you've been receiving has eased your worries so far.

With one final, steadying breath, you release your fears and open the door. 

Your girlfriend doesn't notice you come in at first, given that she's totally in her element, her body winding around as she performs the moves expertly. You lean against the doorframe now, taking in the beautiful sight. During one particular part of the song, she does a set of body rolls, putting the muscles of her abdomen on full display as she flexes them. The low lighting of the room sets the mood perfectly, creating just the right ambiance.

"Damn, baby. Am I crazy or are you somehow getting even better?" The words startle her ever so slightly, pulling her from the other world that she was just in. She glances at you from across the room, and a look of confusion crosses her face for a split second. After she registers that you're you and not some random staff member, her jaw drops to the floor. 

Totally disregarding your previous question, she's quick to replace it with her own as she runs over to you. "Y/N! Oh my gosh, why didn't you tell me??" The words come out in a rush as she engulfs you in a tight embrace, and you snuggle into her warmth. 

"I wanted to surprise you. I've been wanting to switch it up for a while, and somebody told me that this is your favorite color." You say, unwrapping one of your hands from her waist and bringing it up to toy with your hair. "Do you like it?" You ask, biting your lip as the nerves begin to creep back in momentarily. Lisa hasn't said anything yet -- she's just been studying your features with the hint of a smirk on her lips. 

"No, I don't."

"Wha--"

"I love it, babe. You're so beautiful." She says as she rests her forehead against yours. 

With a sigh, you nudge her playfully. "Hey, don't do that to me! I thought you didn't like it." You pout, avoiding her now incredulous gaze.

"Look at me." She commands, cupping your cheek gently as she lifts your head to face her. "Did you seriously think I wouldn't like it? You could be bald and I'd still be just as in love with you as ever. But that color looks absolutely gorgeous on you." 

She always knows just what to say. 

"I love you, dork." You grin, pressing a kiss against her soft lips. 

"And I love you. Now, come dance with me." Her hands skim down your arms on their journey to your hands, and she interlocks your fingers. She walks backwards towards the middle of the room, doing a goofy little shimmy on the way. Her antics draw a giggle from you, and she reciprocates. Before long, the two of you are having a full on dance battle as another new song blasts through the speakers.

[leonhardt-simp]

Really loving the werewolf au with Annie! I know your story started with them already altogether. But can we know, how and when did they meet and the moment they fell in love with? How did Annie confessed and how did y/n handled the truth about them? I'm getting addicted with this. Lol.

It was during the winter months during the night.

Annie was injured because of traps set by the hunters. She came and just kind of busted her way into Y/N’s shed to at least stakeout for the night until she could get some help.

Y/N comes out because of the noise and when they see that their shed is open, they go to investigate.

Boom! A giant ass wolf just sitting and injured in the shed. Scared shitless. Y/N is scared but when she realizes that the monster is injured then she tries to help.

Annie is stubborn, however, not wanting to accept help since she’s a monster. She was capable. But Y/N helps her anyway and Annie finally gives in.

Once she is patched up then Y/N gave her the option to leave and Annie does without hesitation, not even looking back. Y/N believes that was the last and first time she will ever see those beasts up close and that they wouldn’t meet again.

Wrong!

Annie arrives back at the house after fully recovering from her injuries. however, she is in her human form. Y/N thinks that she was just visiting the wrong house but when Annie says that Y/N had helped her then she realizes the similarities. The blonde hair and greyish-blue eyes. It was pretty shocking!

“You’re…. small—”

Annie came to repay the favor however, Y/N is very satisfied in their life and doesn’t want anything in return. Annie insists but Y/N keeps denying her.

This causes Annie to be stubborn enough to start hanging around the girl a lot more to help her but constantly she is being told that she was fine.

Annie and Y/N are constantly having to hang around each other because of Annie’s stubbornness to not just accept the help without repayment. So the longer they hung out the more that Annie noticed how easy it was to just hang around you. The more she revealed herself to Y/N the more she realized how Y/N never really saw her as a “monster” but just another person like her just with a special ability.

“You’re nothing more than just a person, Annie. You may have that but you’ll always just be a person at the end of the day. That’s how you started and that’s how I’ll always see you. There’s no need to single yourself out when you’re just a girl from a town no one’s heard of. We’re not different at all.”

Y/N was always transparent with Annie, finding the company nice. It was repayment enough to have someone around. Having them around made her feel like this part of her wasn’t so bad, they told her that if she ever needed help again that she shouldn’t be afraid to ask.

Annie fell in love with them when they went into the woods of their backyard to play in the snow. She tested them to see if they would change their mind if they saw her in her wolf form again and they didn’t. They just offered to build a snowman with the big dog. It was odd.

After that when they both came back from that exhausting day, they departed from the wolf by giving her a small pat on the head and telling them to get home safely.

Annie did get home but after that then she began to distance herself because she liked Y/N but she didn’t want to burden with that part of her. So she thought that it would be best to just not go after her in that way and that she had no reason to keep following her around since she had nothing to repay.

Y/N believed that Annie had been hunted when she didn’t return. They felt greatly saddened but they weren’t sure what they could do about that.

They met in public by chance and neither of them had any idea what to say to each other. Eventually, Y/N caught on that she was just avoiding them and that she was just worried for nothing. So Y/N nods and leaves in realization. Annie didn’t like that look on her face though. The look of disappointment and disapproval from someone she genuinely cared about, it felt like a silver knife to the chest.

She went after her and told her not to look at her that way, but how could Y/N not? They thought the blonde was dead and they just figured out that it was just because they didn’t want to hang around them anymore?

Y/N told her that “If you didn’t want me to be around then you could’ve just told me that.” before yanking their hand away, Annie was left to think about her actions after that.

Annie comes to make it up to the reader by visiting her house late at night, however, Y/N immediately closes the door after it revealed that it’s Annie but Annie stops the door and tells them that she just wants to talk. Finally, Y/N take a minute before letting her in.

Once inside, Annie finally confesses her feeling of belonging and normalcy whenever she’s around Y/N and that she was just afraid of becoming selfish. Y/N simply listens to what she has to say and that’s when she finally confesses her feelings of attraction to the reader.

“That’s it? You made me believe you were dead over something like this?”

“You act like this isn’t a big deal?”

“It’s not, I thought you were dead.”

Annie felt guilty over it but when the reader tells her that they felt the same feelings for them, Annie immediately denied them.

“Y/N, you cant… You shouldn’t like someone like me-“

“Then why did you tell me? Why did you follow me? You act like I think you’re just a monster running rampant in the street.”

“Because I wanted to say goodbye.”

That’s when Y/N tells her that she was unfair and that she should’ve just left her alone. They get up and tell the girl that she should go and that there’s no need to continue this conversation. Annie is very hesitant. If she leaves then there’s nothing she could do to come back.

“I’m sorry…”

“I’m not. Thank you for the great moments.”

Annie couldn’t understand how Y/N was so calm about her being a beast. She didn’t understand how they could love someone like her.

“Do you really want something like that though? Throw away any chance of a normal life?”

“My life was already normal when I met you, Annie. You being a giant dog isn’t going to change that.”

That’s when there was just a small silence and Annie decides to turn inside the house to scare the other away, Y/N just stared at her with the same expression they had that day in the snow.

“You’re not scary, Annie. I still see you.”

Those were the words that made Annie’s heart race again. That’s when Annie finally gave in to her feelings for the human, deciding that it was okay to be happy.

the end LMAO

[stubbedbakutoes]

Get a Clue

In which Bakugou only smiles around the people he wants to be around, and his girl (y/n) isn't one of them, especially the man who's hitting on her.

pairing: asshole!bakugou x fem reader

word count: 1.6k

genre: angst, lovers to enemies

masterlist

The car had a tense atmosphere. After one hour into their two hour drive up to their mutual friend Todoroki's wedding, Bakugou and (y/n) hadn’t spoken to each other once, his attention being kept on the road, whilst hers was on the phone in her hands.

“Useless fucking GPS.” Irritation pricked at him as he took a U-turn when they reached a dead end.

“It said to take a left, then a right.” She stated, rolling her eyes in the process.

“And look where it got us.” Rage churned inside of him.

“You took two lefts.” She indicated, glancing over at him just in time to chuckle at him taking notice of his mistake since he swallowed down his frustration.

“Thanks.” He deadpanned, not sounding even an ounce grateful.

//

They had only been in the reception of the wedding for half an hour when (y/n) noticed Bakugou start to fidget beside her and unnecessarily tap his fingers on the table as if he was counting down the minutes until he could get home.

“Listen to the best man's speech, will you?” She whispered.

“Is it possible for you to go at least two minutes without being annoying?” Bakugou rolled his eyes.

“Is it possible for you to go at least two minutes without that snarl on your face?” (y/n) retorted, “You have a pretty smile, you should show off those teeth more often.”

“I smile around people I want to be around.”

“Oh c'mon, your best friend is getting wedded!” She giggled, moving her chair closer to whisper. “That lady seated across us may look frightening but she's got a big personality and that guy who accidentally stepped on your foot is probably really sweet too-“

“I was talking about you.” His frustration kicked in.

“M-me?” She stuttered, not expecting that from him at all despite his provocative attitude ever since she stopped by his house earlier morning to drive them here.

“Yes, you.” He spoke slowly, as if he was talking to a kid. “You give me an actual headache when you talk. I thought I made that clear. Wake up, get a clue!“

He held up a finger to indicate he wasn't quite done yet. “And I’m not smiling if I want to, it's not as if I’m making the guests tremble with fear. They always seem to choose me over you and, to be straightforward, I don’t blame them because you're so tiring to be with.”

Ouch. That stung. She took a second to sort through her rapidly moving thoughts. "I thought things were going g-great."

Bakugou let out the fakest laugh ever. "Real low, (y/n)."

"Why the fuck are we even together anymore?!" Y/N eventually whisper-yelled, throwing her hands up in exasperation.    

"Fuck knows why," he practically spat. "I wouldn't even give a shit if you left."   

She was at loss for words, opening and closing her mouth and blinking back the tears she could feel stinging her eyes. She quickly and quietly picking her things up because she no longer had to be here.

"Where – " Bakugou sighed, shutting his eyes and throwing his head back slightly as he groaned. "Where are you going, (y/n)?" He asked tiredly, looking back at the woman in question.     

"Why do you care?" (y/n) scoffed, still seated. "You don't want to be around me anyway, right? You want me to take a hint, right?" She mocked. "So...I’m leaving. Leaving, as in— leaving. I’m done. I’m finished, I can’t—” she shook her head. “I’m done. We’re over.”

Bakugou turns to look at her, an almost unimpressed look on his face. “... Okay. And?” He had a sinister smile on his face. “We were never going to last. You’re just— not good enough for me.”

The Bakugou she fell in love with is now nothing but a stranger to her.

//

(y/n) was in a little black dress that flaunted off her legs with just the right amount of cleavage. Hair's let down, styled carefully, make-up done up as best as she could. (y/n)'s already normally usually feeling like she wasn't good enough for anyone, so having someone she loved with all heart point it out made her feel miserable because tonight was supposed to be different since she actually felt confident and comfortable in her own skin for the first time in ages.

It's been an hour since she broke it off with Bakugou. Sobbing silently, (y/n) headed to the wedding's open bar instead, ordering a beer. It was a cheap brand so it tasted like shit but she drank it anyway, knowing that she'd have to borrow money from Bakugou in order to get herself something more expensive. She mentally scolded herself for thinking of him, causing her to curse loudly at herself.

A soft chuckle from beside her made her jump, and she's met with the sight of a very attractive dark-haired man, maybe a year or two older than herself.    

"Can I buy you something else? Doesn't sit right on the tongue, doesn't it?" He nodded over to the glass bottle she's got her fingers wrapped around.   

Y/N smiled, shaking her head lightly, "Doesn't really matter, as long as it eases the pain" she shrugged a shoulder.    

The man pulled a face, "It's still pretty terrible."  

 "... Yeah, kinda is," she answered and she's laughing lightly – the man also laughing along. "I'm, uh, (y/n), by the way," she grinned from ear to ear, offering him a hand to shake.

"I'm – " he started, but was cut off by someone clearing their throat and then there was the feel of someone wrapping their arm around Y/N's waist.   

"Don't know, don't care," Bakugou's familiar voice drifted into her ears and it's obviously him that's got his arm wrapped around her waist because no one else could immediately make her feel so warm and safe by just a simple act of love. Until an hour ago, that is. So she physically restrained herself from leaning into his touch and slid away from his hold.  

The stranger cleared his throat awkwardly, eyeing Bakugou for a brief moment before backing down and stepping away because Bakugou's glaring at him so hard that even someone innocent would feel guilty for no reason whatsoever.

Y/N slid her gaze over to him and Bakugou's still glaring at the direction in which the man's just walked away, so she huffed in frustration and crossed her arms across her chest as she stared him down.  

"What the fuck was that?" Y/N practically hisses. Who is he to chase off the guy that she'd just been talking with when he was off breaking her heart just an hour before? He's no one, that's who.   

"I want to marry you." Bakugou's voice is low as he speaks, eyes narrowing down on Y/N as she stares up at him defiantly. "I mean it...really."

"I want to burn the image of when I first see you in a dress, the way I cry and how I couldn’t stop crying afterward, and how I feel both embarrassed and glad for my crying, embarrassed because I’m a man and crying in public is still hard, and glad because it means something when you cry on your wedding day. And the way I lift our clasped hands after we're announced, and how I feel accomplished in life, something in between 'We did it,' and, 'Holy Shit this is actually happening.' and-" he cut himself off, not because he was done with his rant.

But because he was crying. He was actually full-fledged crying, tears streaming down either sides of his cheeks and his nose was reddening from sniffling too much. She took a step forward, and Bakugou didn't see her move, because he was so preoccupied with wiping at his eyes – as though to get rid of any evidence that he'd been crying.    

"Fuck off," She nearly laughed out. “That’s not what you were saying an hour ago.”

“I know that but I didn’t mean it, you know I didn’t.”

“Do I?” She looked up to find he was avoiding her intimidating gaze. “Because whoever that was who pushed me out and tried to imply I was a nuisance is certainly not the man I plan to get along with, let alone marry.”

“No. No, I-I’m just. You know I love you. You know I want to— I want this. You know that you mean the fucking world to me, you always have, you always will. I just— I was mad at myself because— I saw, fucking firsthand, how many people want you, and how you could have anyone, but then— you— you’re with me. The quick-tempered asshole, and—” He stopped, figuring his words are all but making sense to her, chest heaving up and down rapidly like he had just been running kilometers at a time. His eyes are still wide, maybe even a little crazed. 

She stayed completely silent. 

All she did was stare at him, breathing almost as heavily as he was. But her ears rang with his words and God, she wanted to walk away so badly—but she doesn’t think she's physically capable of doing so from the boy that she was sure she's going to never stop loving because she's whipped for the guy. Feeling's mutual though, since (y/n) had his heart in the palm of her hands and she wasn't even aware of it because all he did was make her feel like he's leagues above her and it's such a shitty feeling.

Bakugou was the first to break the silence. “I’m begging you, (y/n)” Bakugou nearly whispered out, eyes a shade of stained glass. "If you want to walk out right now, not even be near me, I’ll understand. But— fuck. Please don’t leave me for good. Please let me make up for my shortcomings as your boyfriend, and hopefully— hopefully — as your husband and...the dad of our future children."

[shelby-love]

JAY HALSTEAD

#2 Alone.

Requested: yes

Prompts: none

Warnings: soft angst but with a cute ending

Authors note: Here is the long awaited part two! Hopefully you'll enjoy it as much as you enjoyed the first one xx

PART // 1 //

~

"So...you're mad at him for leaving?" Gabby asks you. She had already knew that you were a bit mad before you even told her what happened.

But mad wasn't the word you would use.

"I'm not mad!" You fight back. "I'm... Disappointed."

Gabby stays quiet for a second.

"I need him right now." You huff and fix the wrinkled areas of your hospital gown. It's something you do whenever you're frustrated. Or even something remotely un-positive.

"I was shot two times Gabby!" For drastic measures you put up your two fingers in the air. "I don't care that I'm whining like a teenager. He was ready to flee the scene with me but he can't come to see me when I wake up from a 4 hour long surgery. Make it make sense goddammit!"

Your friend stays silent before nodding her head in defeat. She sees your point.

What Jay did was something a senior detective shouldn't have done. Ever. Leaving the scene instead of helping was every bit wrong in his Sargent's books and you're sure that he god an ear-full from Voight.

But not even Voight is that uncaring to prevent him from visiting you as some sort of a punishing method. Jay not coming is all him. No one made him tell Will to call him once you're awake and not visit.

"I'll let you rest." She announces quietly before giving you a quick hug. Quickly and quietly she retreats into the hall of the hospital, and soon leaving back to the firehouse to continue her shift.

You're alone in the hospital within the next 15 minutes. Your colleagues and friends scurry into their respective vehicles and drive off.

Every now and then Will swings by to keep you company but apart from that you're all on your own. You aren't updated about the case or anything for that matter.

You're pleasantly surprised when you see Burgess make her way towards you. She's dressed in civil but wears her badge proudly on the belt of her dark jeans. There's an air of importance and power around her that almost makes you feel proud that someone like her is paying you a visit. The proudness is overthrown by the love you have for your friend.

Therefore, you can't help the smile that breaks out and completely demolishes your grumpy and brooding facade.

"Thank God you're okay!" She exclaims, voice fill with relief and happiness. "Jay said you were fine but I just had to see for myself."

Your eyebrows furrow and a scowl makes its way to your face.

"Oh no, what's wrong?" Her big doe eyes round in surprise when she sees your face.

"What else did Jay say?" You ask her before you can stop yourself.

A sudden wave of realisation comes over her and she sighs. "Y/N he's beating himself up. He thinks it's his fault that you were shot."

"That doesn't give him the right to leave me when I need him the most!" Your outburst makes the monitor next to you spike up, almost enough to alert you attending doctor. "He left the crime scene to be there for me when I was knocked out and didn't know where I was but then decided to leave my side completely when I woke up in shock and pain from a 4 hour long surgery!"

It should've been reversed.

"He's blaming himself for it Y/N... He told us that he won't be able to look at you until he finds the ones that did this to you." She talks about it so easily that it almost makes sense. You're too high on meds and you were out for way too long to suddenly feel forgiving.

"Well maybe I didn't want that from him..." You clutch your hands together in a strong grip and let your gaze fall on them. "Maybe I just wanted him to be the first person I saw when I woke up. I needed him to be there for me. Do you know how freaked out I was when I woke up and didn't feel my leg?"

Kim shakes her head lightly. She doesn't know. She can only imagine how you felt at that moment.

"He doesn't have to send me apology flowers or chocolate...but the fact that he didn't even call me. It hurts Kim."

At your truthful confession she stands up and pulls you in for a hug. You got a lot of them today but somehow her's felt the most warm and welcoming. She silently told you a lot of things.

Kim Burgess managed to snatch a few more minutes with you before she was called back.

"Could that be them?" You ask hopefully. Sitting in the hospital injured wasn't bearable knowing that the ones who did this to you managed to run away.

Kim nodded. "Jay has a lead. I gotta go."

She excused herself and quickly slipped out of your hospital room. Soon after, one of the lovely nurses payed you a visit once again with some hardcore medication that knocked you right out into deep slumber.

***

After some time you manage to lift your heavy eyelids long enough to get used to the bright light above you. You manage to stretch your arm long enough to press the magic button that will call someone to your room.

Halfway to the magic button you hear rustling sounds of one's clothing. It's like someone's in the room with you.

Instantly your paranoia kicks in. "Who...who's there?"

Your line of vision is met with an all fimilar set of eyes. The eyes, the nose, the lips, the cheeks...they all belong to only one person in the world.

They belong to your boyfriend.

"Oh, it's you." You tell him, clearly showing zero interest in talking to him. The wish to sit up becomes too strong that you can't ignore it any longer. You prompt yourself on your elbows, feeling pain in your side pierce you like an arrow. The noise that comes out because of the pain doesn't go unnoticed by Jay who quickly stands up to help you.

"I got this." You tell him through gritted teeth. You're still mad and disappointed with your boyfriend.

"No you don't. Don't be so stubborn and let me help you." He shoots back at you and hurts your already injured pride.

"N-no! You don't get to act like a boyfriend now!" You slap his help away like the petty little thing you are. After this new round of meds and a little more time napping with their help, you feel a bit more willing to forgive him. Not that you will show him that. He needs to see what he did wrong.

You can see it in his face. He wants to groan and shoot you a look that will tell you to stop being stubborn but he can't. He knows what he did and he also knows that he needs to explain himself in order to earn your forgiveness.

"Why did you leave me?" You ask. It feels good to finally ask the question that's been sitting on your chest for so long. "I understand what your job is and I also know that I can't expect you to be with me 24/7 but... Call me when she wakes up? They gave me my phone back, Jay. You could've just called me to see if I'm alive."

The fact that he didn't even do that... Instead he told his brother to call him when his girlfriend wakes up. It made you angry.

"You bolted with me in the ambo... You left everything and everyone behind to come with me and when I woke up you weren't there." You feel wet moisture (also known as tears) surround your eyes to the point he and his dark bomber jacket become blurry.

Every feeling you have is highlighted. You gulp the little saliva that created in your dry mouth and ask, "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I couldn't stand looking at you while you're hurt like this, knowing that it happened because I didn't protect you." Jay confesses, bringing his hands to his face. He looks like he didn't sleep at all. "The men who did this to you got away because I didn't stop them. You were shot because of me. Not once but twice."

His words sink in. Your boyfriend is a proud guy. He protects what's his (not that you're an object) and when he doesn't succeed in that it eats him alive. It's the worst thing that can happen to him.

As his girlfriend, he already feels guilty that you have to be alert every day while you two are together because of his job. He thinks that the least he can do is protect you at all costs while you're in his sight.

What you didn't know is that before you went in to bust open the bunker door your boyfriend did everything in his power to get you out of there. To stop you from even entering the place with Severide in the first place.

But he couldn't. Not when his girlfriend is a very well respected member of CFD's famous squad group. Removing you just because he wanted to make sure you were safe was like saying that you couldn't do your job well. And Jay wasn't going to go that far and lie about your capability to do your job. If he did that then you would never forgive him.

And he knew it.

"I needed to find them first. I couldn't just let them go and get the upper hand." He told you sincerely and even managed to grasp your hands in his. "I was worried sick about you Y/N. I couldn't show it because Voight was going to remove me from the case and I needed to be there when we found them."

You take in his confession and nod. You take your hand from his grasp to wipe a few tears away before placing it back down and squeezing tight.

"Did you arrest them?" You ask.

"I kneeled them on the ground and managed to shoot each one when the open fire started." He said proudly. His statement brought a smile to your face. You always liked when he was badass.

"If I forgive you," His eyes sparkle when he hears that making you fight back a bubble of laughter. "Do you promise to never ever ever do this again no matter what?"

If, God forbid, this happens again you want him to be there for you when you wake up. Not chasing bad guys around Chicago while you fight for your life at Med.

"I sincerely promise." He says, pulling your hands up to your face and giving each a kiss.

"Now... Apologise." You lean towards him, smirking like a devil. "And make it good."

MASTERLIST

[redlenai]

I think I want to get this out of my chest even if it's meaningless lmao but I'm gonna do it anyway.

So, while I like and at the same time feel... unsatisfied with the finale of Supernatural, this is more or less how I would have made things end up. Gotta say, I'm not a writer, just some random artist who likes fluff.

So let's say everything ends the same, an the last two chapters of Supernatural are about Dean and Sam trying to live their life to the fullest for all the sacrifice others did, all those that lost on the way.

We see them in domestic activities, still solving cases, working stuff out, Dean seems ok but maybe that's not all of it. Sam can hear him sometimes crying even on his sleep and he knows that for once in their life they have to talk, he wants his brother to be honest and to stop pretending to be strong and that everything is fine.

So he insists Dean on telling him what exactly happened with Castiel, how did he die, what kind of summoning did he did to bring the Empty here. That's when Sam learns about that Cas made a deal to save Jack.

But first, Dean is struggling, he can't say anything about the confession, he just can't, he is just having a hard time with words, he can't repeat them, and he begins to break. The only thing he can say is that it was something so nice it changed him, and that even know he is mad he can't give an answer, he can't give Cas an answer.

On top of that, while he quickly understands the meaning of that moment, Sam feels guilty that Castiel making a deal with the Empty was because of him insisting on bringing Jack back. He feels it was his fault that Cas died.

Dean stops him, telling him that it wasn't his fault, both Sam and Cas wanted Jack back, and that Dean was the one that owed the three of them, that he was the one that couldn't trully see Jack as who he was.

Sam takes the moment to mention that Dean acted so differently when Castiel died back when Jack was born, but that it wasn't the first time it happened... and the way he could see John on his brother, and the parallels with Mary, it made him think that at first, the one that had feelings for the other was Dean. Not Cas.

Then, Dean just apologizes, that he ended up doing something he still can't forgive. He treated Jack the same way John treated Sam.

But Sam ain't buying it, after all the traumas, after all the shit they had to go through, that ain't disappearing magically and that that worries him too, for the day he becomes a parent. And while Sam could run away and distance himself, Dean was still there with John, he was his punching bag for Mary, for Sam, for the life itself.

Dean is just too broken, at this point he can't say anything anymore. But just as Castiel said his true, so did Sam. Dean is no longer a weapon, he doesn't have to keep Sam safe, that for once, after all the people has saved, all the people he has helped, it was now his time to let the world and his brother take care of him, to help him heal.

So that's what the 20x15 episode is about (I know, this is just an ideal because Covid). Dean passes time more with their friends, from both Apocalypse world and those from their world, like Charlie, Garth, Donna, Jody, even time with Claire who has went through the same, he feels a bit pathetic a girl younger than him is giving him support an advice, but they understand each other.

Sam on the other hand decides to spend more time with Eileen, of course, not without caring about Dean being ok by asking their friends. But he starts to do his own thing, he decides to follow Rowena's lead and become a mage, after all he is talented, he demonstrated to be capable of being a leader, so alongside his girlfriend (they made it official), they work at the Bunker leading the hunters in cases.

Dean decides to do something he didn't think of, go to college as a suggestion from Jody but specially Garth. Just as Werewolves didn't had dental care and Garth helped them out. Dean decided to be a therapist, to help out Hunters, after all... They bottle up feelings and trauma and had no one to talk about the life without ending in a Psychiatric hospital.

Life goes on, years later Sam started his own family with Eileen and Dean Jr. On the other hand, older Dean lives on his own, visiting friends, but still, with his time to be completely alone. Or so we believe, he lives near a lake where he does the thing he likes the most, fishing. A place identical to the one in his dreams where he was visited by Cas (20x4). He talks to him this way, even if he doesn't know Cas is listening but he believes his prayer is being listened, just like in Purgatory. He tells he is finally at peace, that he finally believes all those things Castiel confessed to him, he tells him he is happy Sam has that Apple Pie Life, that he is damn proud of his nephew, Claire and Kaia are traveling all around the country with the Impala, and that he prays for Jack to make sure those two treat her gently.

He finally feels free to say that he doesn't regret the life they had, all that they went through, if that lead to finally be free and happy. Sometimes he wished Cas didn't confess so late, but well, otherwise the Empty would have taken him earlier or who knows, he stopped making scenarios a long time ago. He is ready to give Cas an answer.

And right then, we hear the sound of wings, accompanied by Hey Jude.

And that's when Supernatural ends I cry myself to sleep.

[rnufharose]

Chapter 12

Words: 2.2k

Warnings: None

︻デ═一 ♥

Haneul bowed before the three males that accompanied Sehun, her eyes darting toward the man with cat-like eyes, then the tall one from hours ago—Chanyeol—and the third man who was much shorter. He was more like a boy than a man, his eyes twinkling and his smile wide.

"Annyeonghaseyo!" Baekhyun greeted cheerfully, not minding that his voice had slightly cracked during his greeting. "Wow... you really are pretty. My name's Baekhyun, want to be friends?"

"You remember me, right?" Chanyeol showed off his dimples while he smiled. "I'm sorry I lied to you too... but really, I want you to be safe too. Sehun-ah may look scary but he's very kind and loyal. When he takes care of someone, he is very gentle and loving."

"I'm Kim Minseok, but you can call me Xiumin oppa," the eldest of the four males walked toward her, chuckling a bit before patting her head. "You must have been very lonely here... Sehun-ah," he scolded the youngest gently, looking over his shoulder. "You should have stayed here with her... we could have handled FT. It's not right to leave a girl alone at home..."

Even though he was right, Sehun knew she wouldn't want to be in the same room with him if they were alone. It only made his heart shatter again, but he managed to push away the unpleasant feelings in his chest and speak toward the girl, "I'm sorry this is so sudden... I thought maybe having some more people to talk to could make you feel less scared."

He was right. She wasn't feeling very afraid right now. Even though he tricked her, Chanyeol was smiling at her, Baekhyun was buzzing with excitement, eager to talk to her, and Xiumin was very affectionate. Haneul remained silent, and the eldest gestured first her to go toward the living room.

"Why don't you make yourself comfortable? Standing isn't good," he spoke gently.

"Right! Come this way into the living room, Haneul!" Baekhyun said still holding his smile. He loved that he potentially had a new friend, but she just needed to warm up to him first.

Sehun stepped out of the way so she could follow after Baekhyun and Xiumin. He figured if she could get accustomed to his friends, maybe that would be enough to convince her to finally look at him and trust him. Chanyeol sat down across from the three of them with Sehun beside him, looking over the girl again. She sat with her eyes on the coffee table, her hands in her lap and her body was only a little stiff. Vivi leaped onto the couch and sat on Sehun's lap silently, his fingers absentmindedly stroking his fur.

"So, how old are you?" Xiumin asked her, hoping to ease the tension by asking her personal questions, wondering what her interests were.

"Twenty-two," she answered once she faced him. "I was born in ninety-eight, but I was able to go to school with the kids that were born in ninety-seven."

"Ah, so cool! You must be so smart!" Baekhyun cooed from his spot. "What did you study while in undergrad?" He sat forward, resting his chin in his hands.

"I studied music. I only graduated recently," Haneul replied. "I love to sing and play the piano. I was thinking of becoming an artist but things didn't go as planned. Instead, I sing at The Magic Shop. My friend owns that club." Xiumin looks very handsome, she thought as he watched her with intent. And Baekhyun... kind of reminds me of Taehyung. Chanyeol looks like a restless puppy...

"Musically gifted huh?" Xiumin chuckled, jerking a thumb toward the tall, dimpled male across from them, "Chanyeol is musically gifted too. He can play drums, piano, and guitar."

"Yeah, I taught myself, but I can't read music," he laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm sure you can though. Maybe you can teach me next time!"

Sehun smiled slightly, happy that she was warming up to them. Having his older brothers come along turned out to be a good idea after all. She just needed someone to socialize with to feel more comfortable. "Perhaps you'd consider playing for us one day?" He asked, finally joining in on the conversation. He looked at her curiously, the cold look from earlier in the night completely gone. He was fascinated that in such a short time, he'd learned so much more about her. He'd have to repay his friends later.

"That's a great idea, Sehun-ah!" Baekhyun agreed. "Sehun loves music as well. He usually does dance routines and choreography work for songs he really likes." He said to the brunette, who heard the hitman's question, glancing his way, but the moment she saw his face, she averted her gaze, her knuckles going white and her body tense.

"H-Hey," Xiumin began, hoping to cut the tension that filled the air. "it's okay," he held her arm, smiling at her in assurance. "No one is here to hurt you. Sehun is a good guy. Go on, take a look at him. You'll find he looks like a little boy more than a man."

"Minseok hyung is right," Chanyeol said. "In time, he'll be running after you like a baby chick just to get your attention. He's got a very cute face!"

"Just one itty bitty look?" Baekhyun tried as well along with the others. "He really is a sweet guy. I mean he has a fluffy white cloud for a dog!"

"Haneul..." Sehun called out softly to her. He was beginning to feel sad knowing that she still couldn't look at him even after bonding with the others. His brows furrowed slightly, his eyes becoming narrow, and he didn't know how else to help her feel safe around him.

Haneul listened to their pleas, unsure if she could fulfill what they asked of her. After what happened in the alleyway days prior, all she could see was that cold glance. She wanted to hide, disappear so she wouldn't have to be afraid, but at the same time, she knew she couldn't stay like this forever. She would have to face him eventually. Maybe one look didn't mean he would kill her.

She slowly looking up, and she was met with Sehun's face. His eyes were dark but shone like stars, and his hair was black as night. His skin was pale, his nose tall and his lips thin, his features mature and chiseled, and his expression not so cold or murderous. In fact, he looked... normal. He didn't look as scary as she thought he was.

Sehun smiled a little more now that she had finally looked at him. She'd gone as far as to look him in the eye. Knowing this made some of the weight on his shoulders lift.

"That's better, isn't it?" Xiumin smiled between the two of them, content that she mustered up the courage to look at him. "She's much prettier when she looks at you, huh Sehun?"

"I agree with Minseok hyung, she does," Chanyeol have a single, firm nod, sitting back against the couch.

"There's still one thing missing though," Baekhyun squinted his eyes, looking over the girl's face with a hum. "It's the most important thing of all!"

"Smile!" The eldest male sang to her. "A pretty girl like you has got to have a pretty smile."

For a moment, Haneul wondered if she was capable of truly smiling again. After everything she had been through, she thought she couldn't smile anymore. However, these men thought she was capable of it, so she decided to humor them. Her lips tugged gently, and she smiled at Sehun, feeling her own heavy burden being lifted off her shoulders.

The raven-haired hitman couldn't help but stare at her now. He thought she was beautiful before, but now he was sure of it. It was like looking back at all the old photos from her house on the day of her grandmother's funeral. Her smile was beautiful in the photos, but in person, it was absolutely gorgeous. He was able to witness it now, and he hoped she would do so more often. "I like it when you smile. You look prettier."

"And here I thought I had the cutest smile. Looks like I've been beaten, so I give the title over to you!" Baekhyun clapped his hands together, and they all broke into laughter.

Sehun listened to her break into giggles, and he found the very sound to be cute like soft bells chiming. Just listening to her laugh made his heart skip a beat, and one single thought crossed his mind at that moment. She's happy.

︻デ═一 ♥

Hours later, after the three of them left, Haneul gave them one last bow before watching them leave, and she was alone in the apartment again with Sehun and Vivi. This time, she didn't run into her room and hide. She decided to stay out, her gaze trained on Sehun's back.

"Did you enjoy meeting them?" Sehun asked, facing her after he closed the door and locked it. "Sorry if they were a bit overwhelming. They can be a handful. And don't even get me started when Minseok hyung, Baekhyun hyung, and Jongdae hyung are together."

"It's fine... I enjoyed meeting them," she said, looking up at him again. The more she looked at him, the more she realized how sweet he looked. Right now, she noticed how his eyes turned into crescents when he smiled. It was as if he was a completely different person. She felt guilty for not looking at him before and even thinking that he would try to kill her.

He looked her over once more now that she was looking at him without cowering away. Her petite frame stood elegantly in a very proper manner, her healthy, long brown hair tumbled down her shoulders and back, shining in the light, and her beautiful eyes were like sweet chocolates, shining brightly with a lively innocence. Sehun cleared his throat and looked away, hoping to not scare her again with his excessive staring. "You must be tired. Why don't you get some sleep. I still have some work to do so I'll be up a little longer."

"Alright," she nodded, clasping her hands in front of her. "And... you make sure to get some sleep too," she proceeded to walk toward her room before coming to a stop, turning to face him once more. "Also... if you'd like, you can call me Neullie..."

"Neullie..." He tried out her nickname, which rolled off his tongue effortlessly, sounding rather pleasant. It was endearing, just like her, and he liked it. "Alright... Good night, Neullie."

She bowed once more and walked into her room, closing the door behind her, leaving Sehun to be the only one left in the middle of the living room. Vivi walked up to him, standing beside his feet and the raven-haired male glanced at his office. "Come, Vivi..." he mumbled, and the white Bichon followed.

Once he entered his office, Sehun took a seat at his desk, leaning back against the leather rolling chair with a heavy sigh as he recalled the events that transpired today. He realized this wasn't some weird dream. He wasn't living alone anymore. There was a girl four years younger than him staying in the other bedroom, she was the last surviving member of a powerful syndicate she knew nothing about, and he was going to protect her from this day forward.

How will this work...? He thought. He only ever lived with Suho and his family and that was when he was growing up in the Kim estate after they adopted him. As far as he was concerned, Sehun didn't know how to cook or do simple menial chores because the housekeeping staff always handled it. He didn't want Haneul to handle it all but it seemed she would either way. Though having a woman's touch would benefit his life—which wasn't a sexist mindset, not in the slightest—he would have to find some way to make up for his irresponsibilities.

You are such an idiot, he mentally kicked himself. Living off of ramyeon and steamed rice... she's not a prisoner.  You have to make her feel at home, Oh Sehun.

In her new bedroom, Haneul was laying between the sheets again, the comforter pulled up to her chin as she tried to sleep. She too was thinking about the day's events. Yesterday, she was living in the storage room of The Magic Shop before she was almost assaulted, and now, she was living in an expensive penthouse with a gorgeous man who happened to be an enforcer in the mob.

Guess I've been reading too many books, she thought as she hid under the covers. This isn't some stupid Beauty and the Beast scenario... he's just an intimidating guy who works for a powerful family. And you're a girl... who is living... with him... She groaned and burrowed deeper within the comforter. Crap... it is that kind of scenario...

Well into the night, after mulling over every little thing about each other and how they were going to live together, the two of them eventually came to the same thought.

At least we didn't run into a pack of wolves.