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seizethedre · 4 months ago

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(In the Land of Gods and Monsters)

Chapter Six: Living in the Garden of Evil

The King of Hell is a real piece of work, but he's getting there. The Radio Demon is a piece of work too, but he seems much more content to stay where he is, which is fine too. Somehow, they manage.

Ten thousand years of being the supreme ruler of Hell tended to teach you a thing or two about yourself. For one, Lucifer was powerful-–like really powerful. And while the other Sins came close to that power, none of them could ever quite measure up to the fallen angel.

Lucifer had always known his strength, of course. Even in Heaven, he knew his status and his gifts were worthy of envy, you know, if angels were capable of such feelings. Sinners certainly wanted his power, just ask any overlord out there. The occasional coup was nothing new, either, and the king had come to expect one every few centuries or so, with just enough time between them for the shockwaves of the last one to settle and the balance of powers to redistribute themselves again.

It was never anything to worry about and most ended with big, scary tough guys reduced to blubbering pools of tears as they pleaded for their afterlives. And no, he wasn’t exaggerating when he said that a sinner’s existence could be obliterated with a single bored blink of his eye.

Not that Lucifer particularly enjoyed killing sinners all willy-nilly, but he had to maintain law and order somehow, and being in Hell the options for doing so were already severely limited. So squashing bad guys it was. Did he feel bad about it? Not really. He’d never felt that same loyalty to his people that his ex-wife and daughter did, and quite frankly he’d stopped trying to force it out of himself a few thousand years ago, but he was trying. Recent events and relationships persuaded him to reconsider his stance on sinners and maybe, just maybe, he was starting to get it.

Still, you couldn’t blame the guy for wanting to flaunt his power every now and then. There was, after all, no comparison to it in the entirety of the Seven Rings. Sometimes he couldn’t help himself and no one ever said that the First Temptation was ever immune to temptations himself.

Embodiment of pride aside, Lucifer should also be recognized as the embodiment of patience. You would think that after waiting for the creation of literally everything that people would give him more credit when it came to letting the stars align and fall into place at their own pace. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case and more often than not the assumption was that the King of Hell was an impatient little snake who wanted things done his way or no way at all.

Father, you push your agenda one time and suddenly you’re labeled as a devil for the rest of forever.

And so what if today happened to be one of the few times where Lucifer wished the stars would just go off and fuck themselves, alignment be damned. There wasn’t much that got him real fired up these days and his mind had been brewing all night long, practically vibrating in his bed where he tossed and turned restlessly, anxiously waiting for darkness to creep into something light enough that would allow him to bounce off the walls without making the other residents think he was an unreasonable loon.

After running their little taste-testing errand the other day, Alastor and Lucifer had returned to the hotel in one piece-–much to the surprise of everyone else. The former didn’t linger long enough, slipping into a pool of vaporous shadow before he could be subjected to Angel’s remarks about how their orderly states were clearly an indication of a budding, yet taboo love affair, because why else wouldn’t there be a single scratch on either of them? Thankfully, the king didn’t have to come back at him with anything before Husk smacked the spider upside the head with an irritated ‘Quit your yapping.’ And you know what, grouchiness aside, the guy was really starting to grow on Lucifer.

Ha-ha! Take that, yapper.

The little excursion of his had served as a perfect reminder of what Lucifer had been missing. Clearly it had been a while since he’d really gotten himself out there, really gotten to know the people he ruled. Regardless of how they wound up here, they surely couldn’t be all bad. I mean, Wilson, at least he was pretty sure lizard-man’s name was Winston, was a fucking baker for crying out loud! There’s no way a guy who cares that much about the precision of the length of his decorative chocolate shavings can be a complete asshole, right? And if Lucifer was wrong about him, who knew what else he could be wrong about.

Okay, so maybe he owed a little bit of this change in heart to Charlie and her friends, but he couldn’t argue the fact that they were a good influence on him. The simple fact that they stuck by the hotel to defend it spoke volumes of their character and commitment to its cause. Sure they had a few screws loose, but who didn’t own here? The fact of the matter is, they were living proof that even if redemption for a sinner in Hell wasn’t possible, at least change for the better was still on the table. See, even the embodiment of Pride himself could admit when he was wrong, and maybe this was one of those times. And maybe that was all thanks to his daughter

Charlie had always been a bit of a bleeding heart. For years, this had worried her father tremendously. Hell was no place for such a tender spirit, and he was afraid that this place and these people would eat her alive just to spit her out and stomp all over her. The older she got the more he had tried to protect her from that, even when he wasn’t around.

When she had first called him all those months ago asking for a shot to convince Heaven to let sinners prove themselves, Lucifer shot her down immediately. Not because he didn’t trust her vision, but because he didn’t trust Heaven. For all their talk about love and forgiveness, they were notorious for maintaining the status quo, regardless of how many souls they harmed in the process. Expecting to be disappointed in Hell was a given, but to have your hopes and dreams dashed by those meant to uplift and promote them was another and the thought of her enduring that all alone just as he had all those millennia ago broke his heart.

But she’d done it. She faced the firing squad all on her own and despite their treatment she continued to fight for her righteous cause, for her people and her friends. Lucifer couldn’t take credit for that courage. Maybe at one point, perhaps almost too long ago could he say that his heart burned with that same fire, but times, circumstances, had changed and he had no choice but to change alongside them. He was proud of his little girl, and now that he was here and determined to stick by her until the very end, whatever it would turn out to be, he wanted to help as much as he could.

And who knew, maybe in doing this, in helping Charlie, he would be able to reunite himself with that version of him that got a little lost along the way.

He also couldn’t deny the fact that Alastor’s little back-handed intervention sparked some new encouragement in him, too, as much as he hated to admit it. The demon was infuriating, but he’d had a point when he said that Lucifer was worrying pointlessly over things that didn’t require it. Instead, he decided that he would channel some of that energy into something productive, and hey, wouldn’t you know it Charlie maybe your little group therapy sessions really do hold up.

Plus, it was about time he stopped holing himself in his rooms all the damn time, it didn’t really do anyone any good and besides, he was starting to look a little pale-–ha! He figured it wouldn’t hurt the hotel’s image, or his own for that matter, to be seen around the hotel playing a more conducive role than a scary guard dog. Surely people would be more willing to come and visit if they knew their friendly neighborhood devil was around to lend a helping hand. Who knows, maybe if things turned out as well as he hoped, Charlie would put him back on the welcoming committee.

Point of the matter was, Lucifer felt he had a lot more to offer than sitting around and pulling a mean face every now and then. He wanted to contribute to the hotel in a way that was productive and lent itself to the betterment of his people. He had learned a thing or two in his long life and was sure at least some of that had to come in handy at one point or another. And if this idea of his really did work out, it could help alleviate some of the burden that Charlie shouldered day in and day out.

So, as the barest trickle of light crept past his curtains from outside, Lucifer sprang from his bed and set off to accomplish the first-–and only-–thing on his to-do list: start an art therapy club!

With a snap of his fingers the bed was remade with fresh linens, the old ones appearing in the basement’s laundry room. Thinking about his day, he settled on a more casual outfit befitting of the more casual events he had in mind, foregoing the hat and coat he typically opted for on more glamorous occasions. He then ran his fingers through his hair, allowing just enough of his grace to flow past his fingertips to smooth and style his bed head into something neat and presentable, befitting of the King of Hell. Grace was by far the best hair product out there, hell knows how people lived without it. If he could bottle it up and sell it, he was sure it would sell out in minutes and he’d be swimming in cash, but some tricks were better left unrevealed.

Pep in his step, he strode down the stairs, making it down the third flight before he decided that he simply couldn’t wait any longer and opened up a portal to the front lobby. Snapping it shut behind him, he took a look around the empty room, trying to figure out where Charlie might be that morning.

After he swung by to see if she and Vaggie were setting up for this morning’s bonding exercise in the parlor, he trotted along into the kitchen for some coffee. Hey, what’s that they say about two birds and a stone?

Much to his disappointment, there was no sign of Charlie once he parted his way past the double doors. There was, however, sign of a certain deer-man, and by sign he meant the whole fucking person.

Alastor was sitting in his usual spot at the head of the dining table, you know, the one he had refused to give up despite the literal ruler of Hell being much more worthy of it. Not that Lucifer was still bitter about that or anything. The demon was reading the morning newspaper, steaming cup of something dark and bitter in a hot pink mug. Not exactly intimidating, but who was Lucifer to judge when his own mug sported the images of several cartoon ducks. However this was the first time that he noticed there was actual writing on the mug, which he craned his neck to read.

“Does your mug say ‘Oh Deer’ on it?”

“Hm?” Alastor hums, turning the mug in his hand as though observing it for the first time. “Why yes, it would appear to say just that. Very observant, Your Majesty. I see you’ve taken my advice and invested in some cognitive exercises. I’ve always been of the opinion that reading is good for the soul and the mind.”

“Har har, you’re especially hilarious in the morning, has anyone ever told you so?”

“I have been told that I have quite the sense of humor. Who am I to argue with the masses?”

Lucifer pulled a face at his reply, just an impulse away from sticking his tongue out at the back of the sinner’s head for good measure. Eh, why not. It’s not like he could see him anyway.

“I saw that.”

Shit . That was creepy

“You deserved it,” he sang in response, plucking his mug from its designated hook and filled it with coffee. It was still hot and warmed his hands deliciously. He took a cautious sniff and although it certainly smelled normal enough, he knew he could never be too careful.

“Did you brew the coffee this morning?”

“I don’t believe that anyone else was awake to do it.” Fair point.

“...Did you poison it?”

Alastor set the paper down with a huff, ears twitching in irritation.

“Do you really think I would be drinking it if I had?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t actually seen you drink it since I got here.” Alastor says nothing, but raises his mug dramatically to his lips and takes a long sip, flicking his gaze pointedly in the king’s direction. Lucifer watches suspiciously for a few moments after he sets his mug back down on the table with a little clack.

“Satisfied?”

“For now. I suppose.” He takes his own careful sip and smacks his lips. His impeccable palate has never failed him before, and today it’s telling him that he’ll live to see another day. Hooray!

“I don’t know why you throw such a fuss over such trivial things. It’s not like there’s anything that I could actually harm you with in this realm.” And oh, was that irritation Lucifer was picking up on? Genuine emotion from mister Big and Bad himself? Rarely did anyone ever get anything but mockery and sarcasm out of the guy, so this morning was already shaping up to be a good one by Lucifer’s standards.

“Hm, you know if I didn’t know any better, I’d think that you’re a little upset that I’m always one step ahead of you. What’s the matter, deer , afraid of being outsmarted?

“Not at all, Your Majesty .” he ground out between clenched teeth. “ I would simply think that you would have more faith in your own durability, rather than throw a fit any time I’m near something you hope to ingest. Heaven forbid the word gets out that Hell's one and only monarch is a fragile little thing. Oh my, think of the headlines!”

“Aw, Al, I didn’t realize how much you cared. No need to worry about me, though. I’m a big boy who can handle himself, thanks.”

“I know you may find it difficult to believe, but my thoughts don’t always revolve around you. And my name is Alastor . I’d appreciate it if you could struggle to the end of it. I know that’s a lot to ask of you these days.” That smile had curved into something mean, challenging even.

Okay, so that’s how he wants to play, huh? Bring it on then.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes, coffee long forgotten as flames licked the back of his mouth, ready to spew.

“Good morning, Alastor! How did you-–Oh! Dad, you’re here, too! Good morning!”

One of Charlie’s many gifts was her impeccable timing. Growing up, she always knew just the right moment to enter a room and catch her parents in, erm, more compromising positions.. That was why her sudden bursting into the kitchen right as verbal fists were about to start flying came to no one’s surprise, especially her father’s. These days, it seemed that sixth sense of hers came in handy when it boiled down to preventing altercations before they escalated to property damage proportions. Crisis thoroughly averted, the flames smothered as Lucifer beamed at his little girl. Alastor spared the smaller man a twitch before resuming his study of the morning paper.

“Char-Char! How’s my little girl doing this fine morning? Slept well, I hope?” The king bounced himself into one of the barstools at the breakfast bar. He cupped his face in his hands as he leaned intently over the counter, eyes sparkling as he watched Charlie grab two mugs for coffee.

Was he overbearing? Perhaps a little, but he couldn’t help that his sweet daughter was like a literal ray of sunshine in this dark and smelly pit he called home. She dove right into her coffee, clearly oblivious to the dangers of potential-assassination attempts, which he would definitely be speaking to her about later. She sighed, releasing a breath as she forced her shoulders to relax.

“Good coffee, Al. As always.” The demon merely hummed his acknowledgement of the compliment, not bothering with taking his eyes off of the news. She turned her attention to the angel. “I slept well, dad, thanks for asking. Thank god because I have so much to do today.” Charlie began rattling off the items on her mental to-do list, going from casual to agitated in the span of a few seconds.

“First I have to go over the final decorations for the Open House–-again, thank you so much for covering desserts, you’re a real life-saver, dad. Then there’s some laundry I promised Niffty I would help her with in the afternoon, and our yoga instructor was murdered last night so I have to figure out how to fill his time slot in the evening and on top of that it’s my turn to cook dinner tonight and Vaggie won’t be around to help this time so it’s going to take me twice as long as it usually does. Ooh, that’s not even including the meeting I have with Aunty Bee about those new spirits for the bar and--”

“Whoa, whoa,” Lucifer interrupted, seeing no end in sight to her itinerary and only mounting levels of stress. “Pause for a second, Charlie. Breathe. There you go.” She’d gone red in the face at that point, her tail springing out from agitation and best get that under control before she started knocking things, or people, over. The princess smiled sheepishly, mumbling her apologies .

“My, that does seem like quite the list of chores you’ve got there. But, leave it to our dear Charlie to get it all done.” Lucifer scowled over his shoulder at the demon sipping casually from his mug without a single care in the world.

“Um, excuse me, Al , but I was under the impression that you were brought on board to help run the hotel. Shouldn’t you be helping out here?”

“Hm, shouldn’t you , Your Majesty? I do recall you saying something about wanting to play a more active role in your daughter’s life. Now would be the perfect time to do just that, don’t you think so, dear?”

Alastor finally put the damn newspaper down, settling his smile first on Lucifer before swiveling it over to Charlie, who had been standing around suspiciously quiet as the two men went at it. She startled at the mention of her name, eyes going big and round as though caught in the middle of something she really didn’t want to be a part of.

“Um, well, I-–”

“Of course I’m going to help her,” Lucifer yelled, cutting Charlie off before she could finish her thought. “In fact, we’re both going to help you, sweetie. Isn’t that right, Al?” Try to weasel your way out of it now, bitch.

“I appreciate the offer, dad really, but I don’t want you to feel like this is something you have to do. You’re a busy guy, I get that. I’m sure Alastor has his own things to do, too. Plus,” she added quietly, “I know how easily you get overwhelmed these days. It’s okay, I can handle this.” Lucifer faltered at her words, visibly deflating and allowed his facade to fall for a split second before throwing an arm around her shoulder and grinning.

“Nonsense, Charlie! In fact, that’s exactly why I wanted to talk to you this morning. Yoga man couldn’t have picked a better time to die, ha ha!” Hm, poor choice of words maybe, but honest nonetheless. “What would you think about filling that evening slot with an art therapy session? Led by yours truly, of course.”

Charlie seemed to mull it over as Lucifer held his wide smile, examining her face as she went through the pros and cons. On one hand, she knew that her dad didn’t exactly have a one-track mind, in fact most of the time he was the entire train station. And although she didn’t doubt his capacity for patience and empathy, a lot of sinners that came through the hotel required a more delicate hand and her dad tended to fall on the more oblivious side of the spectrum when it came to emotional cues.

On the other hand, this could turn out to be a really good thing. For the hotel and for her dad. She knew he really was trying to change, to see these people as his own. Perhaps spending time with them while doing something that he loved was the motivation he needed to finally get him to where he needed to be. And if she was being honest, her dad was a really talented artist. For years she had wondered why he never truly divulged that part of himself with others, outside of his ducks, of course, but she’d concluded that for some reason his art was deeply personal and emotional to him. The fact that he was offering to share it with strangers all in the name of progress was monumental and she was wise enough to understand just how big of an ask this was.

“Are you sure about this dad? I don’t want you to feel pressured into taking on a challenge that you’re not ready for.” Her smile was small, but sincere, eyes shining with nothing but love and understanding. The sight was almost enough to bring tears to her father’s eyes. His daughter truly was the best.

“Don’t worry about me, ducky. Your old man can handle it. Would I offer to do it if I wasn’t sure?”

“I suppose not,” she sniffed, brushing a finger under her eye. “Thanks, dad.”

The two embraced, Charlie crouching down a bit so Lucifer could run a gentle hand over her hair, a larger imitation of how he used to cradle her in his arms when she was little and in need of a good cuddle.

This is nice , Lucifer thought to himself. He couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to this conversation.

“What a tender moment. I hate to interrupt, but I’ll be doing so anyway. Charlie dear, don’t you worry your silly little head about dinner tonight. I would be more than glad to step in. Rosie shared the most delightful little recipe with me just the other day and this is as good an excuse as any other to try it out.” The demon blinked, all wide smile and bright eyes as the pair in front of him turned a pale green at his suggestion for supper. “I will be going the vegetarian route, rest assured!” Oh, okay, yeah that’s more like it.

“Really, Al? Aw, you guys are so sweet. You don’t know how much this means to me. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” Charlie, whose tears had finally settled down, tried to smile through wobbly lips and glistening eyes. Alastor waved a hand dismissively in her direction.

Oh, don’t thank me. I think I speak for all of us when I say I’d be doing us a favor in cooking our meal knight in your place. The kitchen is practically brand new, it would be a shame to let it go up in flames so soon, hm?”

“Alastor,” the king warned.

“No dad, it’s okay. He’s right. I didn’t exactly inherit the cooking gene, did I?” And Lucifer found that he couldn’t necessarily argue with that point either.

“You just need a little more practice, that’s all,” he tried, a half-hearted grin hanging off his lips. The princess just laughed, visibly far more relaxed than she had been ten minutes ago. Good, good.

“Well, this has been a delightful morning, you two, but I’m afraid I must be off now. Important things to do and whatnot. A hotelier’s work is never quite done, after all. Ta ta!”

With a warp of white noise, the Radio Demon melted into the shadows at his feet, taking with him the ambient noise that had accompanied their morning encounter.

“Huh, that was weird,” Charlie said absently.

“Hm?” Lucifer inquired, raising a brow.

“Al didn’t take his staff with him. He usually never leaves without it.” She paused, seeming to consider something for a few seconds. ‘Come to think of it, he hasn’t had it out much lately either. Not in the hotel at least. It could be nothing,” she rushed to add, seeing the wary interest on the king’s face and immediately knowing that she had let her mouth run unsupervised for far too long. “I know he can pull it out of whatever pocket dimension or wherever he keeps it anytime he wants, I just thought it was odd that he doesn’t seem to be using it as much lately. I’m sure it’s nothing.” She looked around the room anxiously, eyes settling on her watch.

“Oh! Look at the time! I gotta go dad, I’m supposed to be helping Vaggie set up for trust exercises this morning. Love you, bye!” With those parting words she scurried out of the room, hands loaded up with two lukewarm mugs of coffee.

So Charlie had noticed Alastor’s odd behavior too, huh? She was far more observant than people gave her credit for, that much is true.

Lucifer thought back to the last time he’d seen Alastor with his staff, when he was out in public galavanting around Pentagram City with the tall cannibal woman. But Charlie was right, now that he thought about it, it had been a while since he’d actually seen the demon conjure it up within the safety of the hotel, if at all. Not since he mysteriously reappeared after the hotel was rebuilt, seemingly unscathed despite squaring off with Adam.

The devil’s thoughts were racing now, branching out and spiraling in all sorts of directions, jumping to conclusions just to dismiss them and start anew. Despite the web of emotions and possibilities, the overarching truth that stood out from all of the questions and half-threaded leads was that Alastor was hiding something. Maybe even something big. And Lucifer would rather fall all over again than turn a blind eye to something that could endanger his little girl and this new life they were building together.

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