#like it hurts to see somebody who you thought cared become so rich and out of touch (at best)

[bloodmoonlich]

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[gemini-sensei]

Hawk x Reader Angst

I don't know what this is and it ends kind of abruptly, but I hope you enjoy it. Just sorta came to me 🤷‍♀️ (unedited)

What if Reader is a former Cobra Kai who wants to be on the good side, but everyone makes it a lot harder for her to become one of them. They give her a hard time because she was in Cobra Kai for so long, did a lot of thing she greats, said even more things that she regrets. She does everything in her power to apologize and make it better, apologizing so many time, but it doesn't seem to work. She starts to think that everyone hates her and becomes withdrawn.

When everyone makes plans to hangout, she's not invited and she doesn't even try to come along after a while. They go without her and she just stays home. After all, she knows they only tolerate her because she's a good fighter.

There's only one person who gives her the time of day and that's Hawk. He understands the position she's in and tries to keep her spirits up. He's the only one willing to spar and train with her. He gets a few side eyes for it, but he doesnt care.

Things come to a head when everyone gets invited to a party. There's tension between the Cobras and Miyagi-Dos, but they keep their distance for the most part. Reader sits alone for a while because both sides don't want to be near her and everyone else has other people they'd like to hang out with. So she ends up getting a drink and keeping away from everyone.

Hawk eventually finds her all alone in a room, a few empty beer cans at her side and a fresh drink in her hand. He takes one look at her and knows she's fucking wasted. He sits with her so she's not alone, but she looks at him and asks him why.

"Because you shouldn't be alone right now," he tells her taking the drink from her hand. She barely has a grip on it. He takes a sip of it and sets it down out of her reach. "And you should probably stop drinking."

She shrugs. "What does it matter? No one cares."

"That's not true."

"Everyone hates me."

"Not everyone."

She stares at him. "Name one person."

"Me."

"Liar."

She looks away from him with a roll of the eyes and stares at the ceiling. They're just sitting against a wall, doing nothing. She feels like the weight of the world is on top of her, the pressure ready to make her implode.

Hawk shakes his head, ready to make his argument to her when she breaks.

"I just thought that I could do some good after everything I did... but I can't," she says and it's unclear if she's talking to him or to the empty room. She sniffles, then the tears start to shed, making tiny rivers down her cheeks. "I can't make any of it right. It's too late. I fucked it all up and now I'm going to die alone, stuck here, died to a life of loneliness."

"Stop that-"

"Everyone else is so much better than me. Good and kind and fighting the good fight. Sam and Miguel are gonna get married one day and have a ton of kids and grow old together. They'll get to be happy for the rest of their lives once all this karate bullshit blows over and I'll be all alone all because I thought I was somebody in Cobra Kai-"

"Reader-"

"But was a nobody. I was just a stupid puppet in this stupid game and now everyone hates me because I was rude and mean and tried to hurt you guys. I'll be all alone while you find a hot girl to be with and Demetri will become this crazy stupid rich guy with his own tech empire. You guys will be set for life, happy while I'm nothing but dirt-"

"Stop it!"

Hawk grabs her face and looks into her eyes to ground her back in reality. Her tears are fat and endless, her face hot with the havoc her emotions have beared down upon her. She cried hard, as if a damn has broken and her heart is gushing. It's wretched. It hurts. But as he stares into her sorrowful eyes, he realizes she needs to let it out.

So he hugs her and let's her sob into his chest. He holds her tight, trying to keep her pieces together as she crumbles. He never thought he'd see her so low, especially after training with her in Cobra Kai. If people though Tory was tough and mean, Reader was on a different level.

She didn't hold back, even when it came to people on her own team and the other Cobras had been careful around her. They knew if she wanted to, she'd kick them into next week, but that girl wasn't in Hawk's arms at the moment. Wherever she is, she's left Reader weeping in his arms. Maybe it's because she's drunk, but he doesn't care. He saw this coming from a mile away after the way everyone was treating her.

"It's gonna be okay," he tells her. He doesn't know if that's the right thing to say, but it's all he has. "They'll come around."

Reader shakes her head. "I don't know if I can do this anymkre..."

He frowns, rubbing her back gently. "Then don't."

She looks up at him, red and puffy eyes glossy. There's something lost in her eyes, hazy with drunkenness. "What would I do then?"

"Anything you want," he tells her. He pushes some of her hair out of her face. "Thisnisnt working, so find something else."

"But... but what would you do?" She looks so confused and drunk, but somehow sure of her question, as if it's a question she should be asking.

"Why would it matter what I'm soing?" he asks.

She blinks at him. "...what?"

He sighs and shakes his head. "Don't worry about it."

"Okay."

She's stopped crying, but Hawk waits a while long before offering to take her home. She accepts and he helps her up. They leave the party without incident, though Reader is leaning on him the whole way to his car. He gets her seated and buckled up, then starts driving.

She starts playing with the radio and he tells her to stop, so she sits back in the seat. But she can't sit still, so she's shifting and fidgeting. They don't talk much, not that she's saying much that makes a lot of sense.

When he gets her home, he manages to get her all the way to her bed. At that point he's dragging her, but he doesn't mind. As soon as she's laying in bed, she's practically a ragdoll. She's mumbling to him about how sorry she is that he has to do all of this for her because "I just can't do anything right, huh?" He tells her that's not true and it starts a small argument while he's taking her shoes off for her.

The next morning, he takes care of her whilst she's hungover, thinking she doesn't remember most of the night. Things are quiet, but he doesn't leave her side much until he has to. When it's time for him to go home, she's crawled into bed again to sleep off the dull ache left in her head and he says he'll see her around. But the next time he goes to the dojo, she doesn't show up.

Everyone else is a little confused, but not complaining. The next day she isn't there, they think she's sick. Then the next, they start to question it. Reader was a great fighter, why would she just up and quit? Hawk figures she at least remembered a part of their conversation that night and couldn't be happier for her.

However, the next time they're at a competition, he sees her in the crowd. And as the day goes on, he realizes she's only cheering for him.

[fumikomiyasaki]

“A lover out of this world” for any of our pairings :)

Become as gods

With a sigh the goddess of Luck frowned up that huge line forming in front of her temple... to not strain her own powers to much she had to send away one after the other about unecessary small wishes and felt strained just walking around... sitting down eventually looking at the empty box of sweets next to her... looking at her guardian, Tiam.

"People nowadays sadly don't have these hopefull wishes anymore I hoped they would have... all is the hope for being rich or selfishness in own interest..."

As the door opened again a green haired girl walked in... far less nervous than many others who came here to face the godess of Luck and approaching her more like a friend than an authority figure.

"Sup Miss Luck, do you have maybe an actual name I can use better?"

"You really ask a godess her real name?"

"I don't know how the rules are but I do want to get to know you actually before I ask of anything."

A warm smile appeared on Komes face as she looked down to her.

"It is Kome... how about you, dear?"

"Camilla... its an honor to meetcha Kome. Must be a tough crowd you get in here... some of those wishes do not sound well."

"You are correct... I have a reason I only grant those wishes I feel would do good for others... so what is your wish my dear."

She smiled warm at the mortal but phased into surprised as Camilla spoke up.

"I want luck for a friend... their dream was to have this job and the college exam only chooses randomly so I want to help them..."

"You won't use your wish for yourself?"

"I am happy as I am... why should I not use it for them?"

Something about this answer warmed her heart as she gave a firm nod.

"Your wish will be granted... As selfless as you are you deserved it."

With a smile she got up and hugged the godess who turned red slightly before looking back at her... as soon as Camilla left Tiam spoke up.

"C-could it be that you-"

"Don't worry about it but.... I wish half of these followers were this gratefull and energetic."

She sat down again a little in thoughts but at least her mood was better.

Many feared the Lower god guarding the star of wishes... rumored to be a cold blooded Soldier who will take out anyone who fails his trail.... yet what many didn't know was how much he disdained his own task...being puppeteered to bring hurt... not being able to see the light outside of this cave again... his eyes teared up leaving a black trail all over his face... he slumped on the ground holding his blade and canon as suddenly he heard another step into this cave.... this time neither a warrior nor a selfish soul... it was just a pretty girl, dusting off her dress as she walked into seeing him on the ground.

"Oh no.... what happened to you. Did you got attacked?"

"You really... don't knowwhere you are right?"

"No... I got lost on my way here... my Name is Faline, what about you?"

"My name... I... forgot it a while ago... but they call me the god of the lost star..."

"A god?"

She kneeled down before him politely and checked his face, whiping a bit of the black tears off with a tissue.

"You are different."

"What do you mean?"

"Usually when somebody comes in here... something takes control of me and makes me fight anyone out of this cave but... this force hasn't reacted yet... maybe it senses your intentions are pure."

"Or it knows I don't know where I am..."

"Don't you have a wish?"

She smiled kindly at him and stroked his face with the tissue before removing it.

"Is there a way to get you out of here?"

"You don't even know me.... and you care about that."

"Either way you look like you been through a lot of pain... and being controlled by something is not a great life so... could I use the wish to ease your pain?"

He suddenly opened his blue eyes, tearing up again looking at her.

"To think I'd life long enough.... to find this...."

She looked around his body just to find an engraving on his sword.

"Kuze... is that your name?"

He looked at it a little worried but gave her a nod.

"I lost most of my memory but if you want to call me that I would be gratefull... I ... want to be more than just a sword... a killing machine..."

She took his hand and helped him up.

"Then... lets use this wish to make your life better, Kuze."

Its been for the first time he ever felt Human touch... something warm... something comfortable... he wanted to cherish it... rather the wish would work or not.

[luveline]

a special friend, part two [Fred Weasley, George Weasley x reader]

tags: reader-insert, platonic relationships, friendship, can be read as romantic for either or both, hurt/comfort, mental health issues, implied/referenced self-harm, dissociation, quiet reader, shy reader, sad reader

relationships: fred weasley x reader, george weasley x reader

wordcount: 3.2k

read part one here

The common room was always so clean. The house-elves must work themselves half to death with effort, as you never saw a hair or speck of dust where there ought not to be one. The small refreshment table filled and refilled through every new day and the fireplace was always roaring on cold winter nights. It was especially cold that evening, and so the members of Gryffindor house benefited from a crackling fire and hot chocolate coming out of the ears.

You basked in the warmth of the flame, sitting cross-legged before it. A cup of hot chocolate cooled in between your hands, which were both laden with bandaids and germolene. Fred and George’s orders, of course. You were not to scratch, bite or mess in any detrimental way with your hands, arms or skin. If you did, you were to report to them for immediate bandaging.

At first, they’d simply been spelling each wound away. This had an opposite effect, as the freshly healed skin was perfect for picking whenever your mood turned - which was often. You found yourself blinded and basked in the light of being cared for by others, and although you may have preferred complete autonomy over your own body, you couldn’t say you minded the attentiveness of the twins. They’d made it their personal mission to prevent any self-harm, accidental or purposeful. You weren’t sure you even knew the difference half the time.

A quiet had settled over the room. It seemed as though each red and gold student was content to breathe in the smell of chestnut and pine in peaceful, companionable silence. You found yourself smiling kindly at each person who looked your way. You couldn’t imagine having done that before you had become acquainted with the twins.

Acquainted was a word you used to protect yourself. Friendly was too confident, too firm. You sometimes dreamt of horror stories where you, confident and comfortable, admitted how much you cared for them. In these dreams, they laughed in your face. Poked fun at your hope.

Of course, Fred and George weren’t cruel. If they felt that way, they certainly wouldn’t rub it in your face or make you feel embarrassed about it. But some shame never went away, and you carried it like an ever-burning torch.

Despite the pleasant warmth of the room, chills racked your spine at the thought. You pushed it from your head, attempting to think of anything else. You traced a pattern through the braided strands of the rug you were lazing upon, first the flames of a bonfire towering ten feet tall, then a mirror of the powdered sugar landscape outside.

Two warm bodies settled in the carpet on either side of you. A long arm wrapped around your shoulders confidently. The floral scent of your perfume mingled with the strong scent of burning caramel and something woody, the signature fragrance of the Weasley twins.

George moved first, plonking a stuffed toy into your lap. He positioned the neck carefully so that the teddy bear was sat as comfortable as you were.

“For you,” said Fred.

“An early Christmas gift,” George added.

The bear was spotted unusually like some sort of hybrid creature. You wondered where they could possibly have acquired such an artefact.

“We saw him and thought of you,” they said together.

That was rich. And maybe correct. After all, it was a weird looking plushie and you weren’t exactly renowned for your normality. You didn’t say much, simply handing off your cold drink to George without so much as a sideways glance and brought the bear to your face. You grazed your nose against its brown stomach and inhaled, breathing in its clean scent.

Both twins were used to the general quietness that came with your presence and didn’t pressure any response. You knew you should’ve said thank you, or even smiled gratefully, but you just couldn’t make your mouth move the way you wanted. You placed your hand on each brothers leg and applied the barest amount of pressure, hoping it showed gratitude.

“Well, I’m starving.”

“I’m so glad you said so, my brother.”

“Yes, I’m craving something savory, Gred.”

“Something juicy, Forge.”

“Such as?”

You looked between them like a muggle attending a tennis match, back and forth and back and forth. They ran circles around you for their own enjoyment, you assumed, but maybe also to make you feel more included.

“Y/N, fancy a trek to the kitchens?”

Before you could say no, or yes, or make up your mind and decide what it was you wanted to do, your stomach growled. Fred grinned wickedly.

They ushered you out of the portrait hole and down the stairs without preamble, flanking your sides like bodyguards. You didn’t mind, taking time to smile at the castle ghosts and portraits as you went.

The twins shot each other looks when they thought you couldn’t see. One said, how do you think she is? Another said, I think she’s however you think she is. Both said, she seems okay today.

It would feel a little patronizing if it weren’t so foreign - to have people care about your well-being so deeply they made changes to their day to see you and went out of their way to make you feel good; you’d find it condescending if it wasn’t so delightful.

That is to say, you felt conflicted. Happy that somebody cared, ashamed that they also felt concerned. They worried over everything these days, what you ate and what classes you had and oh, ghostie, do you need help with that? Y/N, sweetheart, let me carry that for you, lest your arms grow too tired.

It was… nice. It was nice, even if it was painful. Sometimes, it reminded you why you didn’t allow yourself the pleasure of friendship in the first place.

You hummed to yourself. Making sound had become a little easier. You weren’t inclined to say a whole lot, but allowing yourself to be louder, to take up space, had come easier the longer you spent with them. Neither Fred nor George minded if you huffed after too many stairs or if you clicked gobstones together at the foot of their beds.

The song was one of those cheesy Christmas numbers you’d heard on the radio. It was warm and comforting, bringing tears to your eyes if you thought about it too much. George slipped into song with you easily, humming much more loudly and obnoxiously. Fred just grinned to himself, keeping dutiful watch of the corridors.

You bubbled like a shaken can of coke by the time you arrived at the painting that enclosed the kitchen doorway, feeling too happy for your own good. Despite feeling very hungry, not a lick of fatigue or unhappiness tinged your mood, though the fuzzy numbness of every day threatened your well-being if you stopped to think too long.

The door swung open obediently after your half-hearted tickle insisted upon by the boys.

“What do you feel like, Y/N, sweet or savoury? There’s bound to be something you’ll fancy,” George said.

You held in a grimace. There were lots of things you wanted to try, the kitchens smelled like so many amazing things. The cloying smells of jam and treacle and custard, the hearty scents of gravy and roast dinner. It was too bad, then, that most everything you ate tasted stale. For years, your tastebuds had been slacking. During your worst days, food held no taste at all, resulting in your decreased appetite.

A tingling began in your fingers. You didn’t know what to say, or how to say it, how to convey that you didn’t really feel up to anything at all. You knew they would protest as they always did when you didn’t eat.

“Bread,” you managed. Bread was a safe choice. Dense enough to feel filling, easy to keep down, and bland to begin with.

Both boys were frowning but trying not to at your choice.

George moved forward, catching the attention of a harrowed looking house elf. They conversed with familiarity and soon you were being beckoned to a table that was relatively clear. Within minutes you were surrounded by bread, crusty rolls and sliced sourdough.

George casually nudged a bowl of tomato soup in your direction.

The surface shined with grease. It even had a swirl of cream and a sprig of basil afloat.

He looked at you, eyes pleading.

“You too,” you said.

This appeased him. The boys sat across from you with their own bowls, eating in the horrific way that teenage boys do. By the time they’d finished, you’d managed half of your own meal and two slices of bread. The nausea you experienced from just existing was starting to build, accompanied by the disappointment of your bland meal. You’d hoped an improved mood would help your appetite, but you still felt unsatisfied.

The boys grabbed a passing plate of tarts and ice cream.

Your good mood was wearing thin. You bit down on the tip of your thumb and stared at the grain of the table.

You bit down harder.

“Hey. Hey! Don’t do that,” Fred said, reaching forward as if to grab your hand. You pushed it under the table.

George pushed the plate of confectionary closer to you. “Chew on one of these instead, hm?”

You took it all back - this was patronising. Lovely and thoughtful and very, excruciatingly patronising.

You didn’t want to say no, or push it away, or eat anything else or even laugh it off. You wanted to do nothing. You lay your head down on the table, closing your eyes. You caught a murmur or two between them, though you couldn’t make out the words with your ear pressed so hard against the wood and the other covered by your falling hair. The table was smooth and cool under your skin.

A chair scraped against the floor. Footsteps. A broad hand against your back.

“You’re like a steam train running out of coal sometimes.”

You knew he was hoping for a response, a joke, a sign you’d been cheered up.

Through slow blinks, you could make out his face. Endlessly amused and a little sad, framed by the candlelight. He was beautiful, you thought absently. They were both beautiful.

“You okay?” he said quietly.

“Mm,”

“Mm? Is mm a yes or a no?”

“Mm,”

“Alright,” he said, rubbing a soothing path up between your shoulder blades and down again. It would’ve been dizzying if you could think straight, it made the numbness a little woozy. You preened beneath his touch like a pleased cat, feeling the unhappiness melt just a little.

It was crazy how affection could make you feel better, even if it didn’t always solve the problem.

Embarrassed, you mumbled, “you’re going to kill me.”

Fred smiled. “How so?”

“You’re fattening me up like a lamb to slaughter.”

He didn’t quite laugh, huffing through his nose. He really was very handsome up close. His hair was curling at just below his ears, a lush auburn colour that complemented his pale, freckle adorned skin. His eyes were a heart-melting brown so that his pupils were lost. The look he gave you was searing like he knew exactly what you were thinking about him. Your ears were tinged with heat, cheeks filling with colour.

He retracted his hand.

“Wrap some of those up, Georgie. Ghostie needs her bed.”

“It shall be done, brother mine!”

You smiled despite yourself.

-

For your birthday, the twins had gifted you a simple necklace. The chain was silver, reaching to just below your collar bone. It had no charm or jewel. It was perfect.

It helped you sometimes when you felt out of it to run it between two fingers or tug it gently from left to right, feeling the chain links rolling behind your neck.

You’d tried that, among every other coping mechanism drilled into your head by George and Fred over the past few weeks. You drew circles were you wanted to scratch, put plasters over fingertips you wanted to pick at. You took big breaths and did the stretches George insisted on. You even tried getting a full night’s sleep - nothing worked.

It filled you with guilt. You felt as though you were letting them both down by struggling.

You stared out the window of the dormitory at the sky, moonlight spilling onto your skin and staining your clothes a gauzy silver. You’d read once that sometimes when the planets were in rotation, you could see them as though they were as close as the moon.

This didn’t seem right to you. How could Mars seem so close? It was an optical illusion. The planets revolved around the sun, but humans had once thought they revolved around Earth instead.

It must’ve been a very strange experience to realise you weren’t as important as you thought. The Earth was just the Earth, spinning and wobbling its path through space.

You shook your head, feeling lost. It was ridiculous to project your feelings on the solar system. But still, you couldn’t help but feel like, despite its inhabitants and its systems, the Earth was so lonely.

Your necklace began to grow cold until it was almost like ice against your skin. One of the twins, or maybe both, had charmed it to change temperature. Cold usually meant, ‘Ghostie, you awake?’

You cringed against the sensation. Why couldn’t they booty call you like normal young men, throwing stones at your window with a boom box? Or, for merlin’s sake, an owl?

You grumbled to yourself, throwing the fleece blanket from your body. You were hardly dressed for company in knickers and a tank top, so you threw on a grey zip-up jacket and a pair of pyjama shorts that were hardly any better than the knickers. Luckily the jacket hung past the shorts. You wanted to care that you were dressed scantily, really, but the boys wouldn’t care and you didn’t have it in you to find something else.

You trekked down the stairs, your trainer socks slippery against the well-worn wood. Fred stretched languidly in front of the fireplace, a pack of exploding snap cards and a mountain of chocolate frogs beside him whilst George was sitting much more straight-backed on the sofa.

“I’m cold,” you said, announcing your arrival. The redheads turned to look at you over their shoulders. Fred rolled his eyes at you and flicked his wand. The necklace slowly heated until it was pleasantly warm against your collarbones.

You clambered over the back of the sofa with little grace, folding your knees underneath you and leaning heavily against George’s arm. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

“If I were a lesser man, I’d ask where your bottoms were, Y/L/N,” said Fred, shuffling the cards dexterously.

You raised your jacket wordlessly, exposing your bottoms.

“Wouldn’t you know, they were there the whole time.”

“You assumed the same as me, George.”

George didn’t reply, though his expression said he was similarly embarrassed.

“And do you always let girls you presume to be half-naked climb all over you?” you asked.

“So talkative,” George chastened.

“Don’t change the subject! I’m interested in the answer,” said Fred.

“Oh shove off! You insufferable tyrants.”

Ah, so he knows how it feels now, you thought. You looked up into his face, the line of his jaw.

You looked down at your legs, feeling fatigued. Smooth stretches of skin and fine hair interrupted only by thin white lines. The low light made them almost impossible to see. They shined like silver when you moved, caught by the light of a nearby candle. They felt a lifetime away now when a young you had used pins and quills and little carving knives to punish yourself for bad behaviour.

You traced a slightly thicker one with a pointed fingernail. You pushed it nastily into the scar, but it didn’t hurt.

You sighed.

Fred and George were half arguing about something you didn’t catch, Fred through a mouthful of chocolate.

It was hard, always being miserable. People often criticized the moody for ruining the mood, but it wasn’t as if you could choose how to be. You wanted to wake each day and be happy and entertaining and absurdly good-natured, like the twins. It was an abject cruelty, then, that every day you woke up and felt the immeasurable dread of continuing on another day. Not even magic could help you with that.

You rejected Fred’s offer to play, happy to sit and watch the boys play. You let yourself slide into the space George had vacated, curling into a tight ball. Your stomach hurt.

Godric, there was always something fucking wrong with you.

You were frustrated. The boys could tell. Their game of snap was stretched thin, and you knew it was your fault. You wrinkled your nose at the smell of singed hair, restless. You squirmed against the warm leather under your skin, feeling sticky and out of sorts.

You closed your eyes against the aching and slept.

You woke up crying.

Fred shifted in his sleep. He was leaning against your legs, his hair and face smushed into the leather beneath you. George was facedown in the carpet. You pressed a hand to your mouth to muffle any sound.

The clock on the wall read 4 minutes past 4 o’clock in the morning. You’d only managed an hour and a half of sleep.

You couldn’t remember what you’d been dreaming. Maybe somewhere familiar. Faces you recognized. It didn’t matter, only the feeling of being crushed by the air. You reached out without thinking, grabbing Fred’s shoulder.

He roused gracelessly, blinking through squinted eyes at you. A hard sob rocked you to the core, the feeling of breathlessness sinking deep into your chest.

“What’s wrong? Are you hurting?”

You couldn’t answer. You grasped for his arm, begging him to do something, to save you. You felt as though you were going to run out of air.

“Hey, you’re alright. You’re okay. Let’s breathe, should we? Breathe with me.” He grabbed the hand you’d pushed over your mouth and brought it to his chest. You could feel him take a huge inhale and you tried your best to replicate it.

“Good! That’s good. You’re doing so well.” Another big breath, a long exhale.

“You feel that? The leather under you.” He grabbed your free hand and put it on the seat. “Feels weird, huh? Dimples and wrinkles.” He dragged your hand over the texture repeatedly.

A big breath.

Eventually, your breathing returned. The crying stayed.

“Don’t cry, ghost.”

You frowned. It was odd to be looking down at Fred instead of up. He pressed your hand tighter to his chest.

“Bad dream?”

“Don’t remember,” you whispered.

“It was just a dream. You’re okay. I promise.”

George snored. Fred rolled his eyes. You laughed through the tears, blinking the last of them away.

“Go back to sleep. I’ll be here.”

You knew he was telling the truth.

[noxiatoxia]

heres an anon ask you can use to write/talk more about kaoru getting hurt and hikaru freaking out bc i love any content that has them freak out about the other hurting

OMG SPINS YOU AROUND IN MY ARMS THANK YOU ANON <3 !!

Ok WELL. I have. lots and lots of thoughts. So i did say before I like it best when Kaoru is the one who is injured because.....well ok admittedly I like fucking with Kaoru but ALSO I really love writing Hikaru's reactions. He's always so emotional and overreactive at times. It's fun illustrating the pure panic he's thrust into even in situations where Kaoru really isn't in any huge danger. I'm just. a sucker for characters absolutely flipping out at the smallest sign that somebody they love is hurt.

I've talked b4 about a concept where Kaoru gets a painful but non-lethal or life-altering injury, nothing drastic, but..........ok let me be cringe.....i wanna talk about the potentially darker stuff.

Tw for like, a lot of whump tropes. kidnapping, murder, etc.

Okay. I'm gonna jump into it with an idea involving kidnapping.

This is actually really interesting to me in the Ouran universe, because unlike some series, there's...actually a lot of legit reasons as to why you'd try to kidnap a number of these characters. iirc (dont quote me on it tho) it even almost happened in the manga to kyoya?? from what i've heard. again don't quote me.

SO being rich heirs to a big name company, trying to kidnap one or both the twins? It's actually a really plausible thing to happen.

I think the twins get off lucky in some aspects. Namely, they're identical. In some cases, I could see them not caring which twin they got, but maybe they want Hikaru the most since he's the eldest (and therefore the inheritor) but...which one is hikaru?? and besides, they're always together, meaning you'd HAVE to deal with 2 people. kidnapping two people is a lost of hassle. I think they've avoided it this long on those facts, among just good security and whatnot.

But let's say, one day, they aren't so lucky. dunno if this would happen when they're younger, like middle school, so they're not nearly as strong as they could be. Or it does happen in high school. whichever u want to imagine i suppose.

It could happen in a LOT of ways. maybe they got into a scuffle with some guys and they only got Kaoru. Maybe out of fear kaoru lied and said he was hikaru so they wouldn't go after his brother. maybe they just didn't care and got the first twin they saw.

I can imagine, if both twins were present, they would fight hard. they aren't trained in any way, and with no guards or police to help, they're helplessly overpowered, but they fight like their life depends on it (because for all they know it DOES) and they manage to put up a good struggle.

Maybe they DO end up getting away. Obviously they don't win the fight, but they manage to put enough distance between themselves and their kidnappers that they can run as fast as they can and as far as they can. they end up hiding somewhere so nobody can find them as they catch their breath. They're terrified out of their minds and are huddling together, breathing shakily. they both have some cuts and bruises. they wait until they think it's safe enough to call for help.

But what if Kaoru was seriously injured during the altercation? They still get away, but Kaoru is really struggling to keep up with Hikaru. he's limping terribly because the prick stabbed him in his side and he's bleeding everywhere, but pure adrenaline is making him sprint. Once they hide, Kaoru collapses and as the adrenaline fades THAT'S when it becomes an issue. The pain readily becomes apparent to him and it hurts so bad he can't really move. Blood is getting everywhere and he's breathing really fast, probably because he's so scared.

Hikaru is in a full blown PANIC. he's trying so hard to calm kaoru down, telling him to keep his eyes open, it'll be okay, he's calling an ambulance. He pulls his own shirt or jacket off to press to Kaoru's wound to try and stop the bleeding, but it just soaks through.

The shock and adrenaline wearing off might make Kaoru begin to cry a little as the barricaded emotions and pain coming surging through. this obviously only scares hikaru more.

it'd be fucking worse though if the kidnappers succeeded. in getting kaoru, that is. Oh my god. Especially if they injured him. his brother is bleeding and screaming and these people have him and hikaru can't catch up. he'd feel SO guilty and responsible, even if he physically couldn't do anything bc they injured him too. they like, fucking stabbed him or shot him and he can't move but fuck they have kaoru!! why isn't he doing anything!?

he'd spend all day and night and the days after looking for kaoru, not resting until he gets his little brother back.

It'd be hell on them both. Kaoru is scared and alone and in pain. Hikaru is freaking out and snapping at everyone, yelling at them to do better, find kaoru faster because it'll be YOUR faults if he dies or if something bad happens to him. He's just really, really scared and under so much stress. He doesn't sleep, at least not well, until Kaoru is found. When they rescue Kaoru one way or another, Hikaru is holding him so, so tightly and that's when he finally allows himself to cry, because he was SO fucking scared and this whole thing was a living nightmare and he's so unbelievably ungodly happy to have kaoru back in his arms alive and safe. He doesn't let go of him for hours and snaps at anybody who gets near them. I think it's soothing for Kaoru, too. After the trauma of what just happened, being alone with Hikaru in his embrace makes him feel less lonely and vulnerable.

Don't get me fuckin started if they BOTH were kidnapped though. I think the kidnappers, if they were smart, would figure out very early on they could get them both to comply by threatening Kaoru. Kaoru is already more compliant than Hikaru; he knows when he should and shouldn't fight back. But hikaru isn't. he'll fight these bastards, give them a hard time, do everything to try and break free. Where ever they're being held, Hikaru is causing them so much trouble, and even when they threaten to hurt him, even when they do hurt him, he doesn't really stop. Not for long, at least.

They'd probably find that if they threaten Kaoru, that gets Hikaru to shut up quickly. They threaten to slice Kaoru's throat if Hikaru refuses an order of theirs, has a knife to his throat. Suddenly, Hikaru is begging them not to hurt Kaoru, saying he'll do anything they want.

You can imagine like, any dark or fucked up scenario you want. But basically, I really DO think Hikaru would endure literally anything for Kaoru. As long as they don't hurt Kaoru, Hikaru would take anything and everything they throw at him. Kaoru hates it. He feels so fucking guilty that these awful things are happening and it's because Hikaru doesn't want him getting hurt.

Realistically, you could say most kidnappers wouldn't try to hurt them. They want hostages because they want money, and these kids have lots of money. Hurting them is a last resort reserved for making them comply. I guess it depends if the kidnappers are after something else/get some sort of sick enjoyment out of hurting them, or seeing Hikaru panic when they threaten his brother.

RELATED idea......murder attempts.

again, while I think kidnapping is a more realistic scenario given the Hitachiin's wealth, assassination is also plausible for several similar reasons. It could also just be a case of unfortunate luck having a run in with some less than well meaning person.

But like...Kaoru getting attacked by someone. Their attempt is lethal. They caught him off guard so they have the upper hand, and they're probably using a weapon like a knife to injure him.

Hikaru is never too far away from Kaoru at a given moment, and so he luckily wasn't very far when he hears his brother cry out. And when he sees what's happening, hears the screaming, the attacker's threats, the blood....he goes fucking. ballistic.

It's not like he's even thinking, he just ACTS. It's all a blur as he takes the attacker by surprise and dislodges the knife from their hand. the thing is, if Kaoru doesn't cry out to stop him, if the attacker doesnt just run away, there is a good chance Hikaru actually takes that knife and kills the person himself. He doesn't really think about it. he's high off adrenaline and seeing red from seeing somebody trying to kill his little brother. He's not fucking thinking, just acting on pure instinct. And instinct is telling him he needs to protect Kaoru at any cost necessary. And without hesitation, that includes stabbing a knife into somebody's throat.

He's in a bad daze as the attacker collapses and he focuses on Kaoru, who's also on the floor or at least crouched/keeled over, bleeding and in awful pain. There's blood all over Hikaru's hands and probably his shirt but he doesn't think about it as he crouches down to pull kaoru into his arms. i don't think either of them think to call the police. hikaru's mind is pure static focused only on kaoru. he's not even saying anything. the fact he killed another person hasn't even set in yet, he's just protectively shielding his brother and plugging his wounds with his hands, breath trembling. kaoru's breath is also trembling and he has tears in his eyes but he isn't saying anything. he's shaking. i honestly think police only show up because somebody else saw/heard what happened and called them, and once they show up and confront the twins, kaoru nearly passed out and hikaru pretty much dissociated, does hikaru wake up from his daze and realize what just happened, and oh my god i just killed another person.

i think in this case unlike others, he'd instantly let medics see kaoru. usually he doesn't want anyone near kaoru. not even medics. but he realizes as he snaps out of it just how bad of shape kaoru is in, and he feels awful he didn't call and ambulance and instead spaced out as he squeezed his brother to his chest as he bled everywhere. im sure hikaru also gets into some trouble for the killing thing but tbh good money + circumstances im sure he's let off the hook. that certainly does NOT take away from the trauma though because something like that fucks you up for life, and im sure his hands probably shake really badly anytime he has to hold a knife now.

(^^ that could be a whole story in an of itself... i love trauma recovery <3 both twins would be so fucked up after that experience. should write it sometime)

OKAY ON THE LIGHTER END OF THINGS.... (well, somewhat) just. accidents and other major injuries. Nobody is trying to hurt anybody else, it just sort of happened.

I actually had this idea in my head once in relation to my Kaoru Has Depression thread which i sorta forgot about bc i never posted it on there bc it seemed rather dark/edgy even for that thread and tbh idk if it's in-character(??) but with tweaking i think it could work.

the set up doesnt really matter tbh, but in my head the reason this happens is because Kaoru's been very in and out of it lately. second year of high school and he's dealing with reeeeally bad depression (cuz. i hc he has severe diagnosed depression somebody fucking tell that guy to see a doctor already) and with this comes him being unfocused and generally dissociating a lot. Anyways, it sort of happens at the worst possible time. Kaoru blanks out and is just on auto-pilot and is talking walks. He does this routinely now to clear his head, and he always goes without Hikaru because unfortunately Hikaru is the cause (indirectly) of his stress in more areas than one. so he's alone not really present and just walking wherever his feet take him.

Multiple things could happen here, really. And i have 2. the first one is, well, getting involved in a traffic accident.

i mean if you're wandering around not paying attention to your surroundings and suddenly just step onto a roadway or passage and you aren't aware of that, yeah it's likely a car is gonna hit you.

now i think thankfully kaoru is in a somewhat residential area wherever he's walking aka the speed limit is 25 which isn't good to be struck at but it's not like. 55. so anyways that fucking hurts. it knocks him right out of his depression-induced daze as he's flung across the road either into a patch of grass or onto the curb (if ur Evil) and everything Fucking Hurts. it probably breaks his leg or something, maybe something worse, maybe there's blood. internal bleeding for sure but idk if there would be many outward signs.

the person who hit him is probably panicking like oh fuck are you okay im calling an ambulance right now. and kaoru is still a little dazed, having been snapped from his dissociating to now being in excruciating pain and he can't feel his leg. his hands are shaking horribly but he manages to get his mostly undamaged phone out of his pocket and call hikaru and it's probably really awkward because kaoru is unusually calm because the whole thing hasn't really washed over him yet.

"Hey, Kaoru!" "Hey, Hikaru. Um, just to let you know, I'm not gonna be home when I said I was" "?? Why?" "Oh well, I got hit by a car. I'm probably going to a hospital." "WHAT"

ofc hikaru RUSHES to the hospital to see kaoru only to have to wait a few hours bc they have to make sure kaoru is okay. operations and shit. Kaoru is still pretty out of it even when Hikaru is by his bed-side near tears and Kaoru can't even really understand why... (mental illness)

ok a 2nd idea I had........this one is weirder bear with me.

i like. tropes where characters are Stuck somewhere and have to Survive with it. esp in unfavorable conditions. so, related to what i said earlier: kaoru going for a walk and not paying attention, except this time he's in the woods bc nature pretty or smth. not looking, he takes a wrong step and falls down a small cliff/steep hill, and then he lands...wrong. like, injures his back. and he can't get back up.

plus, his phone either broke on the tumble down or it's dead, so he's just kind of. well. fucked.

i like scenarios like this cuz it's like. the fear and the feeling of powerlessness, the utter loneliness and idea of dying alone. especially for kaoru, that's really scary. it's the one thing he's terrified of most. and since he can't move, he just has to hope somebody finds him. that they care enough to look for him.

maybe he gets lucky and somebody - friend or stranger - finds him relatively quickly, like in a few hours. maybe he's not so lucky, and he's stuck there for over two days.

obviously, i like Maximum Evilness but also I think it could potentially be. interesting? Kaoru is already so mentally unstable. He's already horrifically lonely and depressed. Being forced to be stuck in the dirty creepy woods for days on end, alone? I can only really imagine the things he might think up, what conclusions or feelings he'd reach. Especially as he grows hungrier/dehydration, that would cause major issues not just bodily, but psychologically. Hallucinations/psychosis, generally just. making his depression/anxiety worse. He's a bit of a hysterical mess there wondering if he's being left to die on purpose because nobody fucking cares about him. He wonders if he can even blame them.

I like to think it's Haruhi who finds him, actually. the whole host club are searching with the ootori private police and regular police. haruhi elected to search the woods but surprisingly, hikaru (who has been worried SICK this whole time) tries to shoot it down. they're all under the assumption kaoru was kidnapped, it makes the most sense, and what kidnapper is hiding out in the woods? but tamaki convinces hikaru to give it a shot and so he lets haruhi go.

it's probably a fucking miracle she finds him in time or finds him at all. Kaoru probably freaks out at first thinking it's a stranger or somebody here to hurt him but when he sees haruhi he's insanely glad. he just wants to go home where it's warm and there's food and his brother will be waiting for him.

obviously though, again, experiences like that are pretty traumatizing. hikaru feels like shit for almost preventing haruhi from finding his brother, bc had she not done that he probably would have died. and so he does NOT leave kaoru's side and hovers over him like 24/7.

in general...i just like prompts where kaoru gets hurt, and hikaru proceeds to go fucking feral. wail on the person hurting kaoru, or if there is no perp, just hold kaoru and shield him from any harm and going ape shit if anyone tries to get near them. i think fast-paced traumatic experiences like that really freak hikaru out esp in the moment, seeing kaoru get hurt so fast, the fact he could have almost died. it fills him with adrenaline and fear and so he snaps at anybody because he's so freaked out and he just wants to be alone with kaoru where it's slow and safe. kaoru is in his arms, nothing is happening, everything is fine and sitting still and he's alright. and anything that disrupts that sends him into a frenzy.

so...sorry about going Off about this. i think i derailed the point a few times BUT you asked for rambles you get rambles <33 if you have any dark hikaru&kaoru ideas or just stuff abt them in general ...... always feel free to send. or prompt me onto another ramble.

[momsopposed2theoccult]

It’s come to my attention that a good majority of people on this website have a really poor understanding of the conflict between Toph and Katara in “The Chase.” As somebody who loves both characters and their friendship, this irritates me. Without further ado, let’s unpack that in what is in theory supposed to be a meta but turned out more like a rant. 

“Katara was hostile towards Toph because the fact that she’s a gender non-conforming girl made Katara uncomfortable because Katara is obsessed with gender roles.”

Alright, so right off the bat this is just... completely idiotic and clearly fuelled by an agenda (and likely also a lot of projection). First of all, how is Katara of “I don’t want to heal, I want to fight!” fame “obsessed with gender roles?” There’s an entire episode in Book One dedicated to Katara refusing to conform to societal norms for women in the Northern Water Tribe! Katara routinely calls Sokka out on his misogynistic bullshit! (Mind you I adore Sokka but he could be a little twerp at times and Katara was 100% right to challenge him on it) Katara is the feminist icon of ATLA! The fact that people act like Katara is some sort of conservative tradwife who loves gender roles instead of the outspoken feminist and political activist she is makes me incredibly angry.

Second of all, Katara was extremely kind and welcoming towards Toph at first. She gently encouraged her to join in with the group as they all set up camp together as opposed to setting up her own private camp. It’s only when Toph refuses to comply with her that Katara begins to get irritated. Mind you, Toph has her reasons for this, something I’ll get to in a minute, but from Katara’s perspective (key word here is perspective) she’s just being an annoying little stubborn, selfish, lazy, anti-social, entitled brat. Of course we the audience find out later that this isn’t the case at all (or at least in theory we should find out later but apparently some people on here skipped that part), but for all her many talents Katara is not a mind reader and has no way of knowing what’s going on inside Toph’s head, nor does she know her well enough yet to fully grasp the context behind why Toph acts the way she does. Katara is somebody who greatly values community and believes in teamwork, so Toph turning down her warm welcome in favour of “carrying her own weight” likely felt like a slap in the face. Not to mention that she’s already emotionally exhausted from having to constantly mother Aang and Sokka. If I were Katara, I likely would have reacted the same way. 

Oh and I agree that the “the stars look beautiful tonight, too bad you can’t see them, Toph” comment was out of line, but it doesn’t make her a horrible person. It makes her a 14 year old, and 14 year olds can be nasty, especially sleep deprived 14 year olds. Katara is otherwise a very kind and compassionate person. Other characters have said worse than that. Hell, Toph herself has said worse than that. That being said, it was a deeply hurtful comment and I do like to imagine that she apologized for it off-screen. 

“Toph is a lazy, entitled, and classist spoiled rich brat who just didn’t want to do chores and expected other people to wait on her.” 

This is another one that makes me roll my eyes and ask if they even watched the show. First of all, the presumption that Toph is a lazy or entitled person is just... laughable. I feel like people forget that Toph isn’t actually an earthbending prodigy in the way that Azula is a firebending prodigy (I could say more about Azula and how her belief that she was the unshakeable prodigal daughter ultimately caused her downfall and how by the end of the series Zuko is arguably a better firebender than her but this isn’t a meta about Azula and Zuko, now is it?). Nah. Toph was a sheltered kid who discovered she had the ability to earthbend, was told that she could never become great at it because she was blind, and in response said FUCK THAT and decided to work her ass off until she was not only great but the very greatest all thanks to her crazy, stupid, off-the-charts nerve, drive, grit, ambition, and desire to prove people wrong about her. Does that sound like a lazy person to you? Believe me when I say that you do not achieve that kind of skill level by sitting around on your ass and expecting to have things handed to you. And entitled? Don’t make me laugh. Toph hates having things handed to her, that’s one of her defining characteristics. 

As for the implication that she’s classist and enjoys basking in her family’s wealth and being waited on...... are you stupid? Did you even watch the show? Toph absolutely despises everything about her parents’ lifestyle. Growing up like that was traumatizing and restrictive for her. We’re talking about a girl who likes to play around in the mud for fuck’s sake. Toph does not care how much money you have. She never wanted any to begin with. She even says it herself; “I guess I shouldn’t be complaining. They gave me everything I could have wanted. But they never gave me what I actually needed - their love.” Not to mention that she easily could have continued to freeload off her parents wealth but instead chose to sneak out of the house and make her own money doing what she did best; disproving people’s assumptions about her earthbending. Oh and I’ve seen someone point this out before but WWE is generally considered a “low brow” activity that “proper” people frown upon and shouldn’t associate themselves with. Toph fucking loved it. I don’t know how seriously people take the comics, as they often miss the mark when it comes to characterization (Toph’s, however, was generally pretty accurate), but there’s a part in The Rift where Sokka asks her when she’s going to start charging people to learn metalbending and she gets all serious and flat out tells him that she will never do such a thing, because money doesn’t matter to her. Sharing her one true passion with the world is what matters to her. Oh and the part where she basically tells a bunch of rich and sleazy businessmen to fuck off and “stop thinking about money and start thinking about people’s lives” is just... *chef’s kiss* Sorry my thoughts here are so incoherent but this take is so piss poor and makes me so angry that I don’t even know where to start. As for “Toph enjoys being waited on” I just- *sigh* Toph has such a visceral and defensive reaction to any implication that she is unable to take care of herself. Like I said earlier, that’s one of her defining characteristics as well as the reason for her behaviour in “The Chase.” Where are people getting these takes?

You wanna know why Toph acted the way she did in The Chase? Well, first let’s recap her life up to this point. Toph was born the blind daughter of one of the wealthiest families in the Earth Kingdom. From day one her parents treated her like glass due to her disability. She was not allowed to leave her house unsupervised, and even then she was only permitted to walk around the gardens of her home. Every day of her life she was pitied, gaslit, babied, ignored, emotionally neglected, and made to feel ashamed of herself. She was not allowed to make any decisions for herself. She was not allowed to do anything for herself. She was not allowed to talk to other children. She had no friends. Other people didn’t even know she existed on account that her parents kept her locked up in her own home and didn’t tell anybody about her because they were so ashamed to have a blind daughter. Flash forward to “The Chase.” Toph begins to set up her own camp separate from the rest of the Gaang. Considering that she flat out was not socialized as a child and hadn’t even interacted with anybody her own age prior to a few days ago, this is understandable. So then Katara comes up to her and asks her why she isn’t setting up camp with the others as if she’s somehow incapable of taking care of herself (again, this is just what happened from her perspective) like she’s her mom or something and it just angers her because she thought she joined this group to get away from all that and she doesn’t understand how friends work because she’s never had one, all she knows is that apparently this girl thinks she isn’t capable of taking care of herself, and that infuriates her because it’s the exact same bullshit she thought she was running away from.

There’s a lot more I could say about this but I’m sick of typing so yeah in conclusion both of these takes are piss poor and I’m sick of having to read them. Stan Toph, Katara, and their friendship. 

[bjornswoman]

His bride

Requested by none.

Author's note: Hey guys! It took me a long timw to finish this one, because I wrote it and deleted it then. It just never seemed perfect. I think that it is nice now. I hope you like it. Thanks for your support. Take care and have a good day!

Pairing: Modern!Ubbe x Reader.

Genre: Modern!au, drama, angst, romance.

Summary: Ubbe and you are getting married.

Warnings: None.

You looked at yourself through the mirror. You looked like a porcelain doll. A princess. The white bridal dress fitted perfectly on your body. It hugged your curves like it should do. Your hair was up in a tightly bun and a veil covered your face. The engagement diamond ring was wrapped tightly around your finger and burning was finger. In a day like this one, your wedding's day, you should be more than happy, but there you stood, looking sad and troubled. This wedding was just a covering. A way for both Ubbe and you to get away of difficult situations.

Your family was the type of family that wanted you or better pressured you to marry. But no any man. A man that would be the right for you. The man who they would choose. That man should be rich, famous, from a 'good' family. You had enough of their bullshit. Well, you had married once due to their pressure. That man was nothing like what you had seen at first. He was a lawyer, a famous one. You thought that he was kind and he would treat you fair, but it was nothing like what you thought. Mason was a drunk. He treated you like you were trash. He had even hit you once and of course that was the moment you divorced him. Your stupid family considered it as an unfortunate moment and tried to find another man that was suitable for you.

You would bear someone like Mason again, so you made a deal with Ubbe who had to marry a good woman for his own reasons. It all happened a night, at a bar. You had never spoken to him before, but you knew him because of his younger brother, Hvitserk. Hvitserk and you were friends and he took his brother, Ubbe, to the bar you used to hang out. That night you were extremely upset with them, because they arranged for you to meet a man. He was sitting on a stool next to you listening to you rumbling about your damned life.

"I just can't relive all this." You had said and downed the liquid that was in your glass. His blue eyes had never left your face. Also, he wasn't bored of your rumbling, he listened to you sipping from his whiskey without interrupt you a bit. You had told him all the story. Everything that he had to know.

"You and me aren't so different us both of us thought." Ubbe had started saying and placed the glass on the table before both of you. "You know my father had built a great empire which me and my brothers have inherited. But there is a little detail that prevents us from taking it. Each brother has to be married in order to take his past of Ragnar's heritage. So to take my share I have to be married and I am not. And you know my mother has to check her, to see whether she's right or not." He continued, shocking you. If he hadn't told you about it, you would have never guessed that he had to marry somebody for taking his share of the heritage. "I am thinking of something a while now." After this he paused for some time. "I feel kind of weird because of what I am proposing to you, but it seems a fair solution for us both. Both of us need to marry for our own reasons. I propose to marry each other for four months. This wedding will be a lie, for me to take my share and for you to gain some money and leave your family behind. What do you thing about it, (Y/N)?" He had asked and drank some of the whiskey inside his glass.

You should have said no. You shouldn't have agreed. But what he was saying was tempting and reasoning. You would be free and away from your family. You agreed and after that night everything happened before you could understand that they were happening.

You signed a contract and for the next two months you fake-dated, but much to you surprise you were going to restaurants or bars and talked. You talked more than him. He liked listening to you. But when you asked him about himself he was hesitated. He wasn't the kind of man who talked about himself. You had only understood he was married before with a woman but he divorced that woman for reasons that were unknown to you. Also, you knew he wanted to have a big family that would have a lot of children. He loved children. Instead of leaving you alone all these two months that you were supposed to date, you were hanging out like two friends would do.

And then happened the worst thing that could have happened; you fell in love with Ubbe. This thing was hurtful, because you knew that Ubbe would never feel the same thing for you. You were desperately in love with him and this wedding wasn't helpful.

Your parents were more than happy because you had chosen a man like Ubbe. Rich, kind, reasonable, famous, coming from such a family. They couldn't see the state you were in. Instead of being happy and blissful, you were miserable and sad. You loved the man you were going to marry because of a deal. This wedding was fake and he didn't love you, but you did and all this thing had become way more complicated than it had already been since the beginning.

You couldn't speak to your famiky, of course, about your problem, they couldn't understand. Only Hvitserk knew the truth, but you couldn't talk to him too. He was Ubbe's brother you were afraid that he would say something to Ubbe.

You sat on the bed and left a heavy sigh. Everything had taken the wrong way. You had fucked up everything with those bloody feelings of yours for Ubbe. The hotel room seemed to be smaller than it was moments ago, when the girls helped you dress and the air started to end. You felt like you couldn't breathe, like this gown on your body tightened and tightened all the time. The ring on your finger made all this even worse than it had already been.

When the door opened you stood up from the bed and forced a smile on your face. Your maids along with your mother and the photographer to take some pictures and get you fully ready for your big day. You wanted to talk to your mother, to tell her how you felt, you wanted her advice but she wouldn't understand you. She had never ever understood you. She took out of her purse a small velvet box, as she did that tears were forming on her eyes. You frowned confused. You had married before but she hadn't given you anything but advice for the first night after the wedding.

"This is a gift from my own mother to me on my wedding day." She told you and take out of the box a necklace. Your mother placed it on your neck and you looked at it and then at her. You were still confused. "I was wrong a lot of times with you (Y/N) and I am sorry. I am giving this to you know, because I think that you deserve it. You will be happy with Ubbe, not because he is a Lothbrok, because he cares for you for real." She continued and you couldn't bear the tears anymore. Tears started streaming down your eyes and she helped you wipe them away. You sat down on the bed again and she told to everyone else in the room to leave you two alone. "Do you want to tell me the reason you cry? Something is wrong and I can sense it. You can talk to me (Y/N)." She continued as she sat next to you. You turned to look at her. She seemed really troubled, like she really cared for your state.

You felt shame because of your huge lie to them, but you had no other choice. They didn't leave you have other choice. You sighed heavy and turned your gaze to your hands.

"I feel like I can't breathe, like this room is getting smaller and smaller, like this dress is tightening and tightening around my body, trying to choke me, is that normal?" You spoke and she smiled. You looked desperately.

"Yes, it is. All of us felt these things on our big day. Just don't think about it. Nothing will change after this day. You love him and he loves you, you will just live together. Only this will change. Now I have to go." She said and caressed your bare shoulder softly. You sighed again.

Only if things happened like this, everything would be easier.

"Ah Ubbe..." You sighed and placed your hand on your forehead. "Why can't you feel what I feel?" You asked desperately.

You stood up afraid when you heard someone couching close to the door. You eyes met two familiar playful green eyes and you smiled. At least you tried to smile.

"How are you best man?" You asked him smiling and wrapped your hands around him in a hug. He let out a laughter.

"I am listening in the bride hoping for the groom to love her, am I right?" He asked. You blushed and looked away. Hvitserk laughed again.

"You - you are and I wanted to tell you, but I was a coward. These - these feelings for Ubbe is mistake and you know the reason. I shouldn't have let myself falling like that. Hvitserk what am I going to do now? How can I live the next four years like that?" You asked and let the tears fall again from your eyes. He hugged you again and caressed your hair.

"You should tell him." He said and you lifted your gaze to look at him. "I mean like real. If you don't talk with him, if you don't tell him your feelings about him, you will never know what he feels for you. Don't act like a teenager because if you dont do it, you will lose him, like real. Just do it." He told you, caressing your cheek. When he finished, he placed a kiss on that same kiss and left you alone again.

Hvitserk was right. You should talk to Ubbe, but the problem was that you couldn't say it. What if he didn't feel the same thing, what would you do?

A knock on the door stopped you from thinking what to do. Your father entered the room with a smile and you forced a smile on your face.

"It's time." He whispered and you walked closer to him. Both of you walked out of the room and went inside the elevator. "If you don't want this wedding to happen, we can stop it. In case you have changed your mind." Your father said again, lookimg at you. You looked at him again. If all this finished here, you would never see him again. Ubbe wouldn't want to see you. You smiled, it was a real smile this time.

"I haven't changed my mind. I want to marry Ubbe." You spoke and stepped out of the elevator with you father next to you.

The car ride was quick. You were tgere in no time. When everyone saw you stood up. Your father wrapped his hand around your arm. Your eyes were to Ubbe, as his own was on you. He looked more elegant than usual. He had always been elegant and handsome, but that day he was more of that two things than any other day. You walked down the aisle next to your father, eyes on Ubbe, hands and body sweating.

"Here, love and protect her." You father said to Ubbe.

"I will." He spoke back to your father and took your hand and looked deep in your eyes. He placed a kiss on your lips. It didn't last as long as you would like, but you could say that he was a good kisser. The best kisser. "I have to tell you something after all this." He whispered to you when he pulled away from you.

But before anything else happen, somebody's voice, a woman's voice, stopped you. Everyone along Ubbe and you turned to look at her. You didn't know her. She was blonde and her eyes were blue, like Ubbe's, but Ubbe's eyes had the most beautiful blue you had ever seen in your life. Nobody had that kind of eyes, only his father, his brother Bjorn and his brother Ivar.

"This wedding can't happen because it's all a lie." She yelled and you frowned. She knew. Somehow she knew the truth and you weren't the one who spoke about it to her, because you didn't know her at all, but even if you knew her, you wouldn't tell. You had told to nobody. So it was Ubbe who told her. You turned your gaze at him. He seemed to know her by the look of his face. He was angry. "Yeah, you heard right. My sweet ex husband and now just lover, Ubbe, is only marrying that little girl because he wants to take his share of his father's heritage and she has her own reasons. Her parents craved to get her married so badly and I can't blame them, look at her. Ubbe, my love, you were right. If it wasn't you, she wouldn't find a man easily." She said and you turned you eyes again to Ubbe. How could you have feelings for that man? He tricked you. He acted all elegand, kind, reasonable, gentle and genuine, but he was just a liar. He was like all the other rich people.

"Get the heck out of here!" He growled and she smirked. His blue eyes met with Hvitserk's green eyes and Hvitserk made his way to her. He tried to take her away from there. She resisted but he was stronger than her.

You didn't know what to say. People were gossiping. Your siblings tried to calm down your parents. You were speechless. Ubbe turned to look at you, but your hand fell violently on his cheek, so hard that his head turned to the said and you hand hurt after the slap.

"How dare you!" You yelled at him and tried to relax for a second. When he turned his head around again, his blue eyes were darker than any other time you had looked at them. Ubbe was even agrier than before but you didn't care. You didn't care at all. "I don't want to see your face even again." You said again and run away from there. You didn't expect him to follow you. After all that you would laugh if someone told you so. But he did.

His strong hand gripped your arm and forced you to turn around and look at him. You resisted, but he was stronger. You spitted on his face and he cleaned himself. You shouldn't have done that, because it only enraged him more than before. You could understand that from the way his grip tightened around your arm.

"Let me go! I don't want to see you ever again! How dare you told her about our deal? And how dare you told all those things for me? You don't even know me! Two months is not a long time, Ubbe Lothbrok! So let me go!" You yelled again. Tears were running down your cheeks without you noticed. His thumb travelled on one of your cheeks and cleaned the tears. Then he did the same to the other. "Don't touch me!" You continued and moved your face away from his thumb, but his strong grip on your arm didn't let you move too far away from him, so he did clean your face from the tears.

"First of all brave enough of you to spit me on the face. It was surprisingly funny. Also, sorry for talking to Margrethe about us. It all happened when I was drunk. Margrethe was my ex wife and it was a mistake that I started seeing her after our divorce, but you have to believe me that I have never spoke shit about you. I enjoy your company." He told you, looking straight into your eyes. You believed him. He was telling the truth. You could see through his eyes that he meant each word he said. Ubbe placed his hand on your cheek.

"Why did you divorce that woman?" You asked him the question that was on your mind all this time. He had told you before that he had divorced his former wife, but he had never really told you the reason and you hadn't asked. You saw Ubbe tensing up, but he didn't refused.

"She wasn't who I thought se was. After our wedding I saw the real face of hers. She is an ambitious woman who craves only money. I did everything she asked. I even shared her with Hvitserk." He answered and you felt disgusted. You knew that they used to share woman, but you didn't know that Ubbe shared with Hvitserk his wife. "Will you forgive me?" He asked again and you sighed.

"I don't know if I can." You started saying. You were going to spill the truth about your feelings. He clearly wasn't feeling the same towards you, but you couldn't keep it amy longer in you. You had to say it, to take out of you. "You betrayed my feelings." You said again and he frowned confused. "I developed feelings for you. I - I can't get you out of my mind. I know - I know that we had agreed no feelings but I can't define my feelings. I know that you don't feel the same, you don't have to reject me nicely. I just needed to tell you to take it out of me. Hvitserk told me to—" You were rambling, but his lips on yours stopped you. You were surprised at first, but you leaned in his kiss. The best kiss you had even had in your whole life. He was kissing you hungrily, bitting your lip. You moaned within the kiss and he entered his tongue in your mouth. "What was that?" You spoke within your heavy breaths, as you tried to breathe normally. Ubbe smirked.

"That was my way to shut you down and tell you that I fancy you, woman." He answered amd you felt confused.

"What?" You asked shocked and he smirked again.

"I like you, pet, like real." He spoke and you smiled. You wrapped his both hands around your waist and pulled you closer to him. "That was what I wanted to tell you after the ceremony." He continued and you chuckled. He pressed his lips on yours again in one passionate kiss.

"And now what?" You asked when you stopped.

"Honeymoon trip?" He proposed and you chuckled again. "Let's get out of here." Ubbe told and both of you sterted walking.

[forgiveness-in-the-misery]

Skwisgaar's Psychology

After rewatching Metalocalypse a total of three times ever since the news of the potential finale movie I kind of had a realization; I really fucking love Skwisgaar. I also started by halfway through rewatch two realized that his story and background and general psychology is really fucking fascinating to me.

So I am going to do my best to discuss his character and his psychology and how we see him progress through the show....I already did this with Toki a while back and kind of would love to do it with Murderface and maybe Pickles as well, I'd say Nathan, but he's the....least fucked up in a sense.

Skwisgaar let's start has the most dialogue in the first couple of seasons of the show and even then it isn't overwhelming compared to the other members of the band. By season four he speaks very little and rarely.

When we are introduced to him in the beginning of the show he seems to be like the rest of the group; a diva spoiled rich rocker who has been grossly wealthy for so long that he's forgotten how to function as a human.

You also with the first season especially have this running gag that isn't even a running gag that Skwisgaar or Toki will say something weird and then the other will add onto it and they just say weird shit about life and death or the violence of man, it's weird, and strangely endearing.

Which speaking of how those two play off each other brings me to the fact the pilot episode immediately establishes that these two are almost always together. The band goes to a grocery store and everybody splits up, except for Skwisgaar and Toki who go off together when in all reality that isn't remotely necessary. We also learn in that first episode that Skwisgaar gets pissed when Toki teases him and calls him a woman despite Skwisgaar calling him one like a second earlier and also that Skwisgaar is sexually attracted to elderly women.

Two things are heavily associated with Skwisgaar as a character; he is extremely sexually active and he's got his guitar with him in 99% of scenes. Skwisgaar also doesn't appear to be the most talkative, he can be bitchy and throw tantrums like the rest of his bandmates, but also seems to be more prone to crying and becoming anxious or worried for his friends and their wellbeing/safety, in terms of socializing he seems to be a bit awkward and seems the most comfortable communicating through sex and music. He's teasing and can be a dick, but there's no real edge to it. He also while seeming in some regards to be a bit....dumb to be blunt about it seems to actually be rather smart, though often seems to just keep that to himself probably because he knows who his friends are and they aren't prone to listening to people.

Season one wasted no time in introducing the band's parents and this included Skwisgaar's mother, Serveta. One thing that I do find super interesting is that he is the only member of the band who comes from a single mother, technically it isn't interesting, but the theory (probably canon) that their fathers aren't really their fathers at all and that their mothers became pregnant by the Deth Star makes it interesting. To me at least.

With Skwisgaar's mom in regards to the first season of the show we quickly learn that their relationship is strained. She's an older woman who just like Skwisgaar is very sexually active, we see her come onto Nathan's father who is married and sitting with his wife and son, Skwisgaar's reaction to this is to get upset and begin frantically playing his guitar. Skwisgaar spends a good portion of this episode drinking and at one point saying that ever since his mom got there his stomach had been hurting and he'd just been feeling like absolute shit. When we see him bonding with his mom he's brushing her hair and looking like he'd rather be dead or any place else, seeing him helping her groom is weirdly a red flag to me.

We learn by the third season of the show that his mother is intensely vain and in love with herself, she resents Skwisgaar because being pregnant with him and giving birth to him ruined her 'perfect' body and I'm sure the years where he was too young to fend for himself annoyed her because it meant she couldn't party or have men over or run off whenever she wanted, something I get the feeling that changed when he was about ten years of age. In a bonus video that comes with the first season of the show you see interviews with the band on various random topics; one of the scenes that is...uncomfortable to say the least is when family is brought up. Skwisgaar begins to say something, but trails off and becomes visibly upset before saying he's just going to shut down for a while, Toki confesses some more physical abuse before also shutting down.

I'm going to take a guess that Skwisgaar only had his mother when he was growing up and she only had him, I'm sure she has parents and maybe even siblings and aunts and uncles, but it appears that she has absolutely no relationship with them and Skwisgaar most probably never met these people.

The walls of Serveta's home sport dozens of headshots of herself and a couple of pictures of Skwisgaar as a kid thrown up by the front door almost as an after thought. It's likely and most probable that Skwisgaar was thrusted into the position of caretaker and even a husband sort of position when it came to his relationship with his mom; given the task of looking after her, holding her hair back when she pukes after a night of drinking, doing laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. We know when he was about ten or thirteen years old he came home from school to find his mom having sex with two men, an event that scared him and led to him being chased by wolves and falling into a pit where if he weren't a demi-god he legit would have died. I feel like his mom reached a point with him where she stopped caring whether or not he saw her....personal life, perceiving him as an adult despite still just being a boy and also seeing him as somebody who is taking up space in her home and preventing her from having fun.

When she marries Tyr they're all over each other constantly....until Skwisgaar and Tyr become friends and begin spending time together, then she cheats on him. She was jealous that her latest man wasn't giving her constant attention and got angry at the concept of sharing him with her own child, which is super fucked up.

Skwisgaar throughout the show has a fake persona. He likes to pretend he in some way is like his mom; he likes to pretend he has his head up his own ass and doesn't need anybody but himself, he loves himself more than he could ever love another person. Which isn't true. At all.

I think that growing up with a narcissistic parent who emotionally neglected and emotionally abused him put him in a position where he had to shut down like that. He had to learn at a very young age that crying and yelling and being angry gets nothing done except maybe piss his mom off more, after finding his guitar he threw himself into music and appeared to shut himself off socially, preferring music over human interactions.

Music is something that Skwisgaar can rely on no matter what happens; he will always have a guitar, he will always be able to create music even if it is just for himself and nobody else. People come and go, people physically hurt you, people emotionally hurt you, or make you feel worthless. When we see the flashback to the night Magnus was kicked out of Dethklok Skwisgaar is faded into the background, almost like a ghost with his slumped shoulders and his hair curtaining his face as if he wants to just disappear. When they're auditioning for a replacement Skwisgaar is positive he doesn't want somebody else in the band, that they are fine just being four.

I think it comes from the fact he was terrified of repeating what just happened with Magnus, finding somebody he might think he can bond with over music only for that person to turn into a monster who makes him feel like he can't even do the thing he loves more than anything correctly....Then Toki came in and when they had their duel it quickly turned from a competition into a conversation. Because that's the one way Skwisgaar knows how to communicate, the way he is the most comfortable with; he likes to communicate through guitar and finding somebody who he could speak to through music excited him.

It's clear for obvious age related reasons that Skwisgaar has/had a care taker role where Toki is concerned. I mean he was about 15/16 when Skwisgaar took him into the band so he was a literal child, even when he's older Skwisgaar still looks out for him and is in his own sense immensely protective where he's concerned. Skwisgaar is also that way with the rest of the band even if it's more subtle. He worries about his bandmates, if they get injured or nearly killed it bothers him and he doesn't want anything to happen to them. When the band is going to break up he completely shuts down, because admit to it or not they had become the only family he ever had. I think Skwisgaar is so hard wired from his childhood to care for people that it's something he can't shake and maybe with the band he doesn't feel its a bad habit, because unlike with his mom, his bandmates arent forcing him to look after them. It's something he does because he wants to do it.

Of course in regards to his attraction to older women that definitely comes from issues relating to his mother....I don't think it's in a creepy Freud way, but more so just wanting to feel cared for back. Very obviously he can't exactly approach any of his bandmates and ask for a hug....well except maybe Toki and Pickles if he's super drunk or high, but outside of those two instances....they aren't people he could exactly just ask for validation or comfort or consolation. They aren't....good with that shit. Older women though usually have a tendency to be coddling and kind, Skwisgaar probably learned that as a teen or in his twenties, I think it's less about the sex factor and just feeling important. In terms of sex with people closer to him in age (I will die on the hill that he's bisexual, because he keeps just throwing it out there that he would blow a guy and he had multiple three ways with Melmord) I think it's a distraction for the most part, he uses sex the same way he often uses music, and honestly....He grew up seeing his mother have men over constantly.

Skwisgaar didn't grow up seeing love or healthy relationships, he saw his mom parade various men through the house and maybe she kept some of them for a while and I doubt the relationships were healthy and I'm sure he knew that his mother didn't love any man she dated or married for a short while. Even in the show he isn't fond of love or marriage, the only time he dates somebody is when he moves back to Sweden and finally starts to get his life together in a more healthy sense and that relationship didn't feel like it was based on sex. It was based on physical and emotional affection and it was the only time Skwisgaar ever looked actually happy in terms of intimacy.

Sex is a job, a chore for him; he's the God of Life so it's technically what....it's y'know his thing, creating life. As a lot of people notice....he seems far more sexually active after him and Toki's second fight in regards to music and petty bull shit. Season four is essentially the season where Salacia gets what he wanted aka the band tearing itself apart and you can see them all fall apart individually. For Skwisgaar falling apart means closing himself off, throwing himself more into his guitar and more into sex. He becomes more of a tool and an object as if that's all he wants to be, because being a person who opens yourself up and lets people in and tries to care about people ends up with you being hurt, badly.

Which does bring things back to his super complicated slightly homoerotic to the point even the show had to mention it for a hot second relationship with Toki.

We can gather from Doomstar that Toki was far more into music when he first joined Dethklok which I think worked out great for Skwisgaar, because as I said before; Skwisgaar communicates through music and this gave him somebody that he could talk to without the awkwardness of verbally conversing.

Though that changed clearly and you can feel that Skwisgaar is bothered by it, like in some weird way it feels like a minor betrayal. Toki notoriously never practices or puts in a lot of effort in terms of making music which Skwisgaar often comments on, complains about, or gets on him about. Reasonable. Guitar is part of who he is, but at the end of the day a talent that made him rich, that's what it is to Toki.....Skwisgaar on the other hand his guitar is literally an extension of himself and seeing him without a guitar in his hand for longer than a single scene gets weird.

Still despite the two of them losing the art of communicating through their music....they're close. Super fucking close. If you watch Metalocalypse and tell yourself going into the show that you're going to focus heavily on a single character or on a certain relationship you notice a ton of shit. Like you notice that Toki and Skwisgaar almost always sit together, stand together, talk over one another, finish each others weird sentences or ideas, copy each other to the point they spend an entire episode bickering like children over copying each other, and often spend their time hanging out together. Again. They're really close as if they're a single person split into two.

They're close to the point that inverse their fans just to some extent assume the two of them are fucking and madly in love and I mean I'm gonna be honest just objectively speaking here I would not be surprised to find out they have had sex before at least once or more times. Just saying.

That aside though and just sticking to the platonic here....They're close, Toki means as much to Skwisgaar as guitar does, and that's saying a lot. One big reason I want to bring up their relationship is that his relationship with Toki brings to light Skwisgaar's issues with death or more specifically death where Toki is concerned.

In season one when Toki has a bit of a breakdown and Pickles suggest they kill him, Skwisgaar looks tense and uncomfortable and says that he doesn't like the idea because it's a lot and it makes him feel not so good. In a deleted scene where the band watch Nascar together Pickles ask Toki and Skwisgaar if they were supposed to be dead or in jail or something because it's the same episode where they got shit faced and got into a high speed chase. Skwisgaar when responding about it changes the word dead/death out for sleep, stating they were supposed to be put to sleep but just had to do community service instead (Toki corrects that it was jail, not being put to sleep). In the deleted IKEA scene when Toki stressed says maybe the two of them should just kill themselves Skwisgaar immediately freaks out and later when they return to Nathan and Murderface they both look super emotionally fucked up and when Nathan ask if they had been crying Toki gets defensive and says no while Skwisgaar beginning to cry again says they had been crying. Then of course after Toki ruins Skwisgaar's reputation and becomes Magnus Jr. for a few weeks and ends up having a panic attack and making an ass of himself....Skwisgaar thinks he's having a heart attack and freaks the fuck out terrified that he's dying.

Then finally for a compilation of Skwisgaar not handling Toki dying well; in Doomstar before they go in to save Toki Skwisgaar makes the sorrowful comment that sometimes he wonders if they should have stayed a one guitar band. It isn't him being a dick, he isn't saying this isn't worth it. He's saying essentially that Toki was stabbed, kidnapped and possibly murdered and it's completely his fault; if he hadn't taken Toki in then none of this would have happened. Which immediately leads me to believe that post the funeral episode that Skwisgaar spent those months high and drunk and late at night blaming himself for Toki being taken/murdered. That's a lot of blame to put onto yourself and to say its your fault solely because a few years ago you took this kid in off the streets is honestly heart breaking.

Early on in the series there's an episode where Toki's pissed that he isn't seen as Skwisgaar's musical equal, he wants solos, and Skwisgaar turns him down. Which through the series and within that episode itself we easily learn why Skwisgaar never gives him a solo; Toki has performance anxiety and he never practices and quite honestly knows almost nothing about guitar. It's valid. Either way in this particular episode Toki gets pissed and decides he wants to take lessons, Skwisgaar offers and Toki turns him down because last time they tried...he kind of just ended up beating the shit out of Skwisgaar. (to be fair don't dump a bucket of blood on your friend's head) So he goes off and finds an elderly man to teach him how to play guitar, Murderface being a dick decides to tell Skwisgaar that Toki is super good at guitar now and.....Skwisgaar doesn't react well. He gets pissed off and has nightmares about Toki becoming better than him. He even confronts Toki and his guitar teacher and threatens to kick him out of the band. When he realizes at the end of the episode that Toki is still....really not great with music....he's chill again, everything is forgiven.

I kind of think that episode is a reason people perceived Skwisgaar as a dick or is one reason, but honestly he isn't being a dick. I mean sure, a bit, but they're all dicks. The thing is guitar is a crutch for Skwisgaar, it is super important to him and he doesn't know who he is without his guitar, without his music. So somebody else threatening to take that from him freaks him out and he reacts poorly to it.

Then we get to near the end of the show when the same issue arises except completely different. Toki again later in the series ask Skwisgaar for a solo and Skwisgaar annoyed refuses him, Toki being the mild psycho shit that he is decides to just kind of ruin his life as revenge. Again by this point in the show its kind of obvious if you actually pay attention at all that Skwisgaar keeps telling him he can't have solos because Toki never fucking practices and even in the studio Skwisgaar has to record most of the rhythm guitar parts. He's also known since Toki's audition that the kid is prone to choking up and making mistakes, so he's technically protecting him without just outright confronting him.

Toki writes a book calling out Skwisgaar as an abusive tyrant and an over dramatic bitch. Admittedly Skwisgaar is a slight diva and just like the rest of them can be a total asshole, admittedly to a lesser degree than the others. What's really fucking interesting for me personally about this episode is that Skwisgaar is catatonic and depressed for 99% of it. He doesn't speak. This starts literally the second that Toki releases his book saying that Skwisgaar abuses him, this is before Skwisgaar's career goes down the toilet, his career hadn't been impacted by this yet.

Skwisgaar falls to pieces because Toki, Toki who he's known since he was just sixteen and took in off the streets and they're always practically attached at the hip and have been since day one just released a book calling him an abusive monster.

I do have a feeling one reason this fucked him up is because he might be terrified that he's turning into Magnus without realizing it, that perhaps he has become an abusive monster and has been making Toki feel the way that Magnus made him feel towards the end of his time in Dethklok. I think there also is probably something soul crushing about the person you love platonically or otherwise referring to you very publicly as abusive. Of course all of this worsens when Skwisgaar's career begins to fall to shit, eventually towards the end when Toki is at the top of his ego trip being a prick Skwisgaar does confront him, that in itself is interesting.

Skwisgaar goes in way calmer than I would be in that situation, sure he gets pissed off as they bicker, but again he's waaayyyy fucking calmer than anybody else would be especially since Toki just yells at him through the entire conversation. Of course interestingly is that Toki perceives Skwisgaar in a way that isn't entirely true, he thinks Skwisgaar mocks him and thinks of him as nothing which isn't true at all, when he says Skwisgaar laughed at him he just responds that he never did that and he sounds slightly hurt by that. They're both hurt and none of these men are good with healthy emotions. Skwisgaar never loses his shit on him in the entire conversation, he looks like he could easily go ape shit but instead warns him that the audience will eat him alive the second he fucks up.

Which turns out to be true, Toki fucks up and people begin turning against him which leads to him having a severe panic attack. Like I mentioned before Skwisgaar thinks he's dying and tries to save him, scared out of his fucking mind at the concept of Toki dying. Which....the dude just spent several weeks treating you like garbage and calling you a monster who abuses him, if Skwisgaar was actually a shitty person then he would have laughed at him or mocked him or given him shit about this moment for years to come....but he doesn't do any of that. He is worried about saving him, probably terrified that if Toki dies then their last conversation was a fight.

Their dynamic changes a lot after this, not in a way that's overly obvious unless you watch it closely. They spend a lot less time together and what feels almost out of character initially in Dethcamp is....Skwisgaar easily going along with Murderface and bitching about Toki, because....again can't stress the Scandinavian dudes are always attached at the hip and now suddenly he's easily saying mean shit about Toki. It feels weird until you remember that not long before this they had a massive fight, Toki called him abusive and momentarily ruined his career and most likely afterwards tried to act like nothing happened at all while Skwisgaar probably wasn't capable of doing that.

Occasionally in season four Skwisgaar and Toki will sit together or stand together, still talk or have that physical closeness but it's far between and you see Toki spend a majority of his time with the toxic trio: Murderface, Rockso, and Magnus. Skwisgaar spends his time typically with Murderface and Pickles then near the end spends most of his time with Nathan.

Skwisgaar is a person who grew up in a home lacking affection and love or safety, he didn't grow up with examples of love or healthy relationships and as far as he's concerned relationships are a waste of time and energy because they all end the same.

Of course for as much as he says that, as they all say that....it's bull shit. He cares deeply about his bands and him trying to act near the end like Dethklok was just another gig it isn't, these people are his close friends and his only real family. Seeing Pickles and Nathan fall apart wrecked him and having Toki turn on him so easily gutted him. Skwisgaar is a super emotionally fragile person, he seems absolutely terrified of showing anger or aggression as if it's something he's never been comfortable with or learned when he was young gets you nowhere or perhaps there were men around who were violent and loud and it made him scared to ever be that way. He's the only one of the band we never see really lose his shit or be randomly aggressive and violent, he also strangely enough cries the most out of them canonically. People always make the assumption Toki cries a lot, but like canonically he cries waaayyyy fucking less than Skwisgaar.

I really find Skwisgaar interesting....clearly and this analysis might be a jumbled mess, but there's strangely a lot of things to unpack and things I probably didn't even touch on as much as I could have, because this is already insanely long. I have a deep appreciation of him rewatching this show now that I'm older and far more into analyzing works of fiction.

I hope that this was remotely coherent.

[jypbae7]

Could you do a breakdown natal chart for Kun from Wayv?

QIAN KUN - NATAL CHART

Kun was one the most requested I got which was a pleasant surprise!!❤️❤️

(Not claiming to be an expert this is just for fun please don’t take anything too seriously!) Hope this is helpful and that you enjoy it 🥰❤️

Personality: Capricorn Sun, Leo Rising, Taurus Moon, Capricorn Mercury, Capricorn Mars

Clearly a LOT of Earth sign placements but nicely broken up by the fire sign rising

Capricorn Sun has serious and long term plans for the kind of future they want for themselves and once they set out for it they seldom give up. Stubborn to a fault, but also consistent enough to actually persevere. They want the perfect job, reputation, partner, house, family, etc.

Leo rising is a bright, warm and outgoing personality. Lots of energy, creativity and flair. They enjoy having a strong core of friends that they feel understand and enhance their experience and effect on the world. Leo’s are known for being hardworking and as a fixed sign it offers a lot of consistency and determination. They are extremely devoted and loyal once they develop a bond and trust with someone. Though the passion can fizzle out quickly if they aren’t feeling the kind of attention and passion they want.

Taurus Moon is a very grounded person with more social charisma and approachability than Capricorns are known for. They also have a tendency to like bold styles, they have big dreams and goals and you’ll be surprised at how well they can attain them if they’re focused enough (Kun is a Capricorn Stellium so yes this boy KNOWS how to get shit done when it needs to be done) Taurus is also a fixed sign which along with the stubbornness everyone knows about also comes with patience and consistency making them really good leaders when added with their natural friendliness and perseverance

Capricorn Mercury indicates a strong preference for structure, somebody who tends to follow rules and feels uncomfortable breaking them. They tend to have authoritative energy and demeanor. Big ambitions and determination to succeed and excel in their chosen career. Spend more time thinking than they show with a generally very logical mind which can sometimes lead to a black & white perspective

Capricorn Mars - responsible, organized, secretly a thrill seeker, can come off as aloof or guarded when they are around new people or people who they really want to make a good impression on.

Relationships:

Non-Romantic Relationships: Capricorn Sun, Taurus Moon, Leo Rising, Capricorn Mercury, Capricorn Mars

Trustworthy and dependable - the “dad” of the friend group who everyone calls when they have something serious to deal with

Platonic love languages: acts of service and quality time - he loves spending time with people with shared interests especially music. Also loves going out to different places such as different trendy cafes, movie theaters, museums - you name it.

Likes other thrill seekers who push and motivate him to get out of his comfort zone

Sense of humor is a lot more childlike and playful than one would expect from his serious and strict side

Capricorn energy is NOT to be crossed or messed with. These are the ones who are calm af and calculated when angry - this is when you know you are screwed. When Capricorn is calm and collected while enraged, ohhh boy, do they figure out ways to hurt you in the smoothest and most effective ways without so much as lifting their finger. Spare yourself the trauma and DO NOT LIE to him no matter what.

Romantic relationships and preferences : Aquarius Venus, Capricorn Mars, Capricorn Juno, Aries Eros

Aquarius Venus is outgoing, friendly and charismatic. They are attracted to interesting and unique people who stand out of the crowd. They like bold and spontaneous gestures and they will do them back for their partner as well.

Aquarians also dislike overly clingy/needy partners which Capricorn also isn’t a fan of either. These signs are all about independence, individuality, personal expression and achievement. Meaning that while they do yearn for a partner (especially Capricorn placements) they want a partner who is self sufficient and independent with their own hobbies, careers, dreams, goals, etc.

Capricorn Juno implies they’ll be a tough to nail down for very long because Capricorn wants only the best of everything and they’re always busy trying to excel at things and scoping out their options. So you’ll have to prove your worth to them before they are willing to commit because once they do it’s for the long haul

Capricorn likes natural ethereal beauty while Aquarius likes the bold - my guess is healthy mix of both. Natural looking and soft featured with some bold/unique traits like bright/bold hair or fashion style, a bit of spice/sass here and there is another secret pleasure

Be prepared for endless serenades and songs made and sent to you like love letters - whether he’s singing or composing a warm ethereal instrumental for you, his whole heart is in it

Love languages (most to least) - words of affirmation, gift giving, physical touch and quality time

Words of affirmation makes him feel really wanted and needed, he’s also really really good at giving it out to people he loves so if he’s doing it one sidedly it would hurt him and make him feel insecure.

Gives either unbelievably beautiful luxe gifts or unique/fun gifts and loves to surprise his partner with them often especially after time apart

Capricorns HATE wasting time they are hyper aware of how many hours in a day and how much can be done in a day. So, if he’s spending a lot of time with you, you’re very very special and important to him and he prioritizes this time very highly

Star gazing dates, beach dates, camping trips - this man will go out of his way to make sure every date is an experience. He is PREPARED, he has an itinerary in his mind, he’s looked up the travel routes and picked the best one. When you go camping he will FLEX with his efficiency and ability to handle the labor heavy tasks. This man will purposely wait till you’re looking to start chopping wood (not that ANYONE is complaining), put the tent up and have it filled with blankets and pillows galore in 2.00034 seconds because he practiced in the dorm living room with the others like a drill routine. (Lucas taught him how to chop the wood & still look hot while doing it)

Is the MOST polite and endearing person to your family and friends. Goes above and beyond to be the perfect partner around your family and they are unable not to LOVE him. Is especially soft and doting of any children or elderly relatives. And none of it is phony at all, he doesn’t know anyway else to even think. Respect, manners, and family are extremely important to Earth signs. They’ll probably end up liking him more than you but honestly you can’t even blame them

(None of y’all ungrateful people better ever slack on Zaddy Kun’s visuals ever again!! If I don’t get to see his happy trail during 2021 I’m burning the SM building down once and for all)

18+ Preferences:

Aries Eros ooof - passionate, possessive and steamy. Pick their partners off instinct and energy - once they really like you they become infatuated and want to STAY that way. If it’s not the “I need you so fucking bad I’m gonna lose my mind” type of love they DON’T want it.

Leo Rising is a possessive as fuck placement thankfully when they get riled up or jealous they have the confidence not to get angry with you or insecure about it. BUT.... you‘ll still be awakening a whole new type of beast and quite frankly he will let you know that it’s all your fault as he holds you down and uses you like the stupid toy you are till you remember who you belong to

If he sees you doing anything even remotely domestic his Taurus Moon and Capricorn Juno will have his mind go from soft and warm thoughts to bending you over the kitchen counter and taking you right there without a care or second thought spared

Positions where he feels in in control are his favorite - he likes being on top of you, behind you and if he can pick you up and carry you while ramming into you best believe he will.

His favorite is position is missionary - likes to feel big and dominant he also wants to be able to see as much of you as possible and kissing you as much as possible from your lips to just about anywhere else he can reach. Will be staring at you 99% of the time with big smoldering eyes that don’t waver in the slightest. In fact if you give him eye contact back he’ll just be even more turned on

Now...this might be controversial but... Capricorn Mars usually suggests power play/dynamic kink - think rich powerful CEO who secretly fantasizes about being tied up and blindfolded. Not to say that is exclusively his main kink bc it’s definitely not, he is 100% mostly dom BUT with the right person he’d be more than willing and very excited to try it out - probably because they are always in control so it’s an adrenaline rush for them to relinquish it to someone else. Doesn’t necessarily mean an extreme level of being submissive even just simple restraints can feel very extreme for a bossy and in-control Capricorn

Aquarius Venus also likes breaking relationship “norms” and trying out new things. They are super fun and bright when happy so when he’s in love he’s in LOVE. Wants to sing about it 24/7 but is too stubborn to be clingy or needy. The type to smile during sex, especially when he’s on top of you or drunk. Don’t even get me started on drunk handsy Kun whining in your ear about how he just wants to sneak out of the party early.....bc I will genuinely never recover

Very vocal in the bedroom - gives his partner tons of praise. Completely loses his mind and is loud af when you kiss your way from his neck down to below the hips

Most of the time sex with him is more passionate than kinky, not lightening fast jack rabbit thrusts instead hard and deep rhythmic ones that make your whole body shake - Hungry makeout sessions, sneaky little hickeys where no one else will see, massages than turn into hours of love making, takes his time to hit deep and hard inside you, handfuls of your hair, gaspy whispers

When he is feeling more kinky it’s usually spur of the moment. In the car in the middle of a rainy night during a cancelled schedule or after an especially steamy date night where he decides to take you to a hotel afterwards

KING OF AFTER CARE (NOT up for debate) - cooks you an amazing meal afterwords or orders up a feast if he’s too spent to get up too, cuddled up in blankets watching a movie for the rest of the night afterwards.

[inarizakibabe]

Changes

As the first prince of his country Suna had just about everything his heart could want. Riches, fine silks and linens, and more food than he could eat. One would expect with a life as luxurious as his he would be happy. Unfortunately his father could see the sadness deep in his son's eyes. Maybe he needed  new hobby or more servants to boss around? Then again looking at things carefully the king noticed his son avoided the servants as much as he could. Just what could cheer up his son and bring back the joy in his eyes? Oh! Maybe that could work.

"You called for me father?"

"Yes Rintaro. I've noticed your sour mood these past few months and I think I know what could make it better." the king smiled down at his son. "I remember entering a funk as you young kids say and your grandfather threw a ball in my honor and I ended up meeting your mother."

Suna fought hard to hide the disgust creeping onto his face. Surely his father didn't really think he wanted to meet someone.

"So that's why three days from now we will have a ball and invite all eligible maidens to attend. Maybe I'll be able to see you smile again,"

"Um father with all due respect I don't really see how a ball will improve my funk as you called it. Maybe if I took a ride around the forest I'll feel better?" Suna hoped his father would get the message but knowing how stubborn he was he'll most likely be engaged three days from now. "I'll even bring my attendants to make sure I'm alright."

"Nonsense going for a ride isn't what you need. Trust me on this Rintaro. A ball is exactly what you need. You're dismissed. You have a ball to prepare for." The king said before turning back to the papers on his desk.

Suna sighed and left his father's office. Maybe if he ran away nobody would miss him. Or the entire kingdom would be put on lock down until he was found. He couldn't put his people through that so there was only one thing to do.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The next day Suna found himself taking a walk in the garden. If all goes to plan he wouldn't have to propose and maybe he could get the freedom he was craving. Sure castle life was fun but when you have people constantly telling you how to live and doing every thing fro you it can get tiring. Before he turned eighteen he didn't have as many responsibilities as he does now. Life was simple he would take lessons during the day and after a certain time he was free to do what he wanted until dinner time.

Now he's stuck behind a desk everyday taking on the tasks of the kingdom he father didn't want to do. If he got to leave the castle anymore it was for business and once all was settled he'd come right back home and behind the four walls of his personal office again. His home had become a prison and his office his cell.

"You know if you continue to frown at the ground it's less likely to open up and take you away from here."

Suna looked up and found one of his attendants speaking with him. He had two personal attendants who miraculously happened to be twins. They met each other at the age of six and have been together ever since. The one speaking to him now was the blonde one Atsumu which meant his brother Osamu, with gray hair, was most likely harrassing the kitchen staff.

"That sounds like a dream come true right now. Don't you feel suffocated here? You've lived here your whole and trained to work for me. Was it something you always wanted or was this chosen for you?" Suna asked.

"Sounds like someone is scared of their responsibilities. Alright Rintaro tell me what's wrong." Atsumu offered Suna an encouraging smile until he noticed the deadpan look on Suna's face. "You don't have to look at me like that you know."

"No offense but, actually take as much offense as you can from this but last I checked advice giving wasn't something you were capable of. Where's Osamu?"

"Looking up one of the maid's skirts. Now what do you mean I'm not a good advice giver? I happen to give great advice to people in need." Atsumu huffed.

"Right right remind me again why ten percent of the palace guards quit after you left 'inspiring' words with them." Suna mused.

"Be glad you're a prince." Atsumu muttered dejectedly.

"Threatening the crowned prince? That's grounds for dungeon time. Let me know if you want gray or white sheets." Suna laughed as he continued in the direction he was headed before.

"I'll take green. Look the fact of the matter is you're clearly not happy about something and as one of your attendants it's my job to fix that. I can get your horse saddled if you want and tell your father you had an entire platter filled with cheese." Usually Suna would grimace at the mention of cheese but a ride through the kingdom sounded more like what he needed.

"Thanks but no thanks, after the last time my father would kill me if he found out I ran off again. If you did want to cheer me up you could figure out a way to get him to cancel this ball he's throwing in my honor."

"You know as well as I do just how stubborn your old man is. You'd have better luck raising the dead than changing his mind. Look on the bright side. There'll be cake." Atsumu smiled at Suna who in turn frowned at him.

"For saying that you get purple sheets."

"Wait! Let's talk this out!"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The following day Suna found himself in his room being fitted for a new suit. In the twenty minutes he's been standing there he's been pricked by pins three times.

"Last warning tailor. The next time you hurt the prince you'll be charged for treason." Today Osamu was keeping Suna company

''Forgive me your highness. You're more built than I'm use to dealing with. Rest assured this suit will be the most beautiful suit you'll ever wear." the tailor put another pin in the fabric he was working with and prayed he hadn't pricked Suna again. "If I may ask, what occasion is this ball in honor of? The last celebration we had was your eighteenth birthday and I believe your birthday isn't until next year so what's the joyous occasion?"

"You'll find out the day after the ball until then please focus on leaving skin on my body." Suna sighed.

"Of course your highness my apologies again."

"Tsumu talked to me yesterday. What's going on with you?"

"He talks too much. He simply saw me walking in the garden nothing else."

"Oh yeah? I heard that princess you met in Shektor is coming tomorrow. Should I make arrangements that she's your first dance of the evening?" Osamu smirked at Suna who scowled at him. "Oh dear your highness what an expression. Be careful Princess Tsumaki doesn't see it she might think one of the wind goblins is tickling your nose again. In fact I'll write a letter to her right now to bring her special medicine to cure you!"

"Osamu you bastard! Ow! Alright fine enough I'll answer both your questions just stop tormenting me! I should have both of you locked up for treason." Suna growled trying to keep the parts if his sanity he still had.

The tailor and Osamu smirked at each other as Suna began to speak again. "I just felt trapped behind these walls recently. Is everything I'm doing really important? I sit down and sigh papers all day either about farm rations or mining and I just don't see the need to do any of that. The people know what they need to survive and they know how to do what they need to survive so why should I waste time looking over it for them? They're not children who need to be supervised they'd be well off without me. The again if I don't do that then what is my purpose here? What am I suppose to do with my life? Am I just the face the people use when they need something? No wait that's my father's job so I'm just here. I make agreements and trade deals with other countries and attend diplomat meetings my father can't make it to. If I didn't do any of that then I'd be a regular boy in the kingdom maybe doing stable work. Sounds better than being the one everyone blames for everything if things go wrong. My father apparently doesn;t know me very well and thought I was lonely so he's throwing a ball for me to find a wife. What's not to love about that?"

Osamu sighed and pulled one of Suna's cheeks. "First don't talk about yourself like that. Like it or not this is how you were born and there's literally nothing you can do about that. It doesn't matter what kind of job you do even if all you did was tell someone to move a chair you still did something and it benefited somebody in the long run. You can't see yourself for the things you do but me and everyone else around you can. You just need to look at things from a different point of view."

Suna looked away from both of them and sighed while taking in Osamu's words. Maybe all he did need was to view things from a different perspective. Yeah maybe that could work. "Ow!"

"You didn't have to stick him again Mori." Osamu sweatdropped.

"Nope that time definitely was an accident. Please try not to move your highness." Mori smiled innocently.

Or maybe his tailor would take him out first. Whichever came first he guessed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The day of the ball finally arrived and carriage after carriage arrived at the castle holding nobles and royals from near and far. Suna was in his room again watching from the window as carriages entered the palace grounds. Maybe if he's lucky he could make a run for it during the party and jump the fence to get away from everybody to maybe save himself for a little while. Or maybe one of guards sees him and tries to follow him and ruins his plans.

"Just sit through the ball and I'm sure your father will let you leave for an hour tomorrow."

"Yeah right after his engagement announcement. Listen Rin if you don't want to do it then I don't see why you should."

"Don't listen to Tsumu. We'll help you if you need a breather every now and again but we can't cover fro you the entire night."

"Or eat these two slices of cheesecake right now and be excused for the rest of the night." Atsumu suggested wiggling his eyebrows.

It was a pretty solid plan but a night of pain wasn't worth missing the ball. His father might only postpone it and he'd be confined to his room until everything passes.

"Well gentlemen it's my last night a single man. If I'm lucky Tsumaki won't be my future bride. The small bout of freedom I had was nice but it's time for me to be a big boy and do what I have to. Once I'm king the first thing I'm doing is making sure Asami doesn't go through this." Suna sighed.

"I doubt she'd have a problem with it. Which girl doesn't want to be entertained by a handsome man? Bonus points cause he's rich." Atsumu shrugged.

Suna's eyebrow raised in confusion, "Are you calling the princess a money whore?"

Atsumu chuckled softly and smiled at Suna. "You and I both know that's not what I meant. You're really the only person who has a problem with palace life. Asami is actually looking forward to her happily ever after which is something you need to start doing. You can hate it but if it's something that has to be done then you have to suck it up and get it over with."

"You can say that because it's not your life. I need to teach Asami about how dirty boys are. Osamu you'll be the example for what you and Mori did yesterday. Who could've imagined my attendant and the tailor conspiring against me. The mutiny." Suna shook his head in mock disappointment.

"Be disappointed all you want. I did what I had to do. Now you have to get ready for tonight. If you need us you know where we'll be." Osamu left with Atsumu right behind him.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*

Night fell quickly and two hours into the party Suna finally met all the young women his father had invited. Many were kind and some more beautiful than necessary but all quickly looked away when Princess Tsumaki approached him. The night continued on as his father hoped with Suna being forced to mingle with everyone present. Eventually his social meter began to run out and he retreated to a hidden balcony for air.

A sound close by caught his attention and Suna found a young woman who seemed to be in the same situation as him. If he remembered he remembered her name was (y/n) third princess of a neighboring country. Suna tried to sneak away before you could see him but alas luck wasn't on his side.

"Your highness good night."

Suna counted to three then slowly faced you with a friendly smile, "Good night my lady. I hope you're enjoying the party."

"It's lovely and so is your country. Please give your father my thanks for inviting my family."

"I can assure you he'll give his thanks for attending. If I'm not being too forward may I ask why you're out here instead of enjoying the food?" Hopefully pressuring you like this will give Suna the quiet time he was hoping for.

"Forgive my rudeness but the amount of people inside made the room a little stuffy. I came out here for a little air." you smiled at him.

"Fair enough. I hope the air is to your liking."

"With all due respect your highness it's been a long night and it's exhausting speaking like this so if you don't mind we can call each other old acquaintances and speak like old friends would. It would be an honor if you would call me (y/n)."

Suna blinked at your request and fought the grin trying to rise on his face. "If that's so then feel free to call me Rintaro. Blame my father for taking things the wrong way and forcing us all to go through this."

"We can't really fight what our parents want us to do. Comes with the title really. You seemed upset earlier should I assume that you don't really want to get married?"

Suna sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I don't mind getting married I just don't think I should get married because my father thought I was in a funk as he called it. Sounds cliche but I actually believe in meeting someone and falling in love."

You blinked at the prince and giggled. "You're very cute Rintaro. I like to believe everyone wants to fall in love that way. Nobody wants to have their partner chosen for them. What good is being married if you're gonna be miserable everyday."

"If it means I don't have to sit through marriage consultations and weird balls like this one then I may just prefer the other way."

"Careful what you say. I think we both know your father is capable of that. I saw princess Tsumaki looking for her Rinnepoo earlier. Maybe I should let his majesty know you've chosen someone." You looked up to find Suna pouting at you. "Careful your highness they may send you back to etiquette classes for making such a face."

"Good evening Prince Rintaro. It's a pleasure to make your aquaintance tonight. I do hope that-"

"Ok! That's enough! Don't you dare repeat that."

Suna smirked and hid his mouth behind his hand. "Pardon me princess. I just found your greeting to me this evening amusing. I mean no harm it's just you were so cute. How many times did you practiced that?"

"Whatever. Let's see what you would do if the roles were reversed."

"Sorry princess but this isn't about me." Suna giggled.

"So you can smile and laugh. I almost thought you were emotionally constipated. Is that the funk your father thought you were in?"

Suna sighed being reminded of the situation he was in. "It's more than that but nobody would understand."

You smiled at him encouragingly. "The whole you're royalty so you have absolutely no reason to not be happy thing?"

"Exactly that. It's gonna sound stupid but I guess I miss the freedom I had before I turned eighteen. Well more I don't see the need for me to do the things I'm doing."

"Ah you feel monarchy should be abolished. Look at it this way crackers taste good on their own but with cheese the taste is elevated. Cheese and crackers is superior to just plain old crackers by themselves or just cheese by itself. Yes your kingdom could probably prosper on it's own but there are situations the people shouldn't handle on their own. Budget distribution, land distribution, diplomatic matters and many other things. We exist to keep harmony in the kingdom. Imagine leaving children to raise themselves. Many would unfortunately die before reaching a certain age. Think of your kingdom as your very own children. They're self sufficient yes but without you to guide them in the things they don't understand they'll be hurt. You can still do the things you love but your children come first. If you don't take care of them then someone may just take them away. "

Suna sighed. "I can understand that but I just don't understand why it has to be me."

"I don't understand why it can't be you. Anyone could've been chosen for the job but you were chosen. I don't know you well enough to speak on certain things but I have heard rumors that you basically run half of your kingdom on your own. The fact that nothing has fallen apart shows that you're more than competent to do your job. You need to have more confidence in yourself. I've only known you for a short time but I can already tell you're a wonderful person. Don't sell yourself short." You smiled at Suna who looked at you unsure.

Suna shrugged, "If you say so (y/n). Are you hungry?"

"I'm alright for now. But I do think we need to get back before someone misses us."

"What's the rush? You know the reason for this party."

"Is that you asking for my company your highness?"

"I didn't hear a no princess." Suna smirked when you giggled.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A few months later Suna found himself sitting in his office again. He was hard at work but this time with a slight smile on his face. A knock on the door took him away from the work he was doing and Atsumu stepped into his office.

Atsumu placed a sandwich and a cup of tea on the table in front of Suna "You seem to be in a better mood these days. What's your secret?"

"Sorry but secrets are secret for a reason."

"Keep your secrets then. Simply means I can't tell you the one I just heard." Atsumu smirked.

"I heard the dungeons don't have heat." Suna shrugged.

"Really? Just make sure my sheets are red."

Suna laughed and shook his head, "You little turd nugget. What's going on?"

"Alright fine but only because you asked so rudely. I heard your favorite princess is coming by later today. Maybe if you finish all your work you can be at the doors to greet her."

"Lucky for me this was the last page I had to look over. Prepare two horses and I'll make sure your sheets are maroon."

"And you call me the turd nugget." Atsumu rolled his eyes. "His majesty said you can do whatever you want for the rest of the day once you stop keeping him in suspense."

"Sounds good. Thanks for lunch."

Things were definitely starting to look up and with one simple question later tonight Suna's life was about to change again. This time for the better.

[marshmallowprotection]

Oh gosh, that post about Saeyoung and his characterization made me want to clap! I once had an argument with one fan who was bashing on him for... 'loving his brother more than he loves us'??? That literally made me feel weirded out. Like, damn. And yeah, a lot of people make him seem more cruel, than he is in canon. I think there's a similar problem with Suit! Like, yeah, he was acting aggressive and harmful - that's undeniable. But... he never really directly hurt us? It's more bark than bite. Well, maybe except for that bite and pushing us on the floor, but in fanon it's always way more extreme than that. I read a few fics where he literally tortures mc and enjoys it, and... it always felt so wrong to me. And I love dark scenarios! I have a few aus myself, but there's always some outside force, that makes them act this way. Like, I can imagine him isolating us or locking us in the room. But I literally cannot imagine him, for example, tying us up and hurting us directly. I genuinely don't believe he's capable of that... Maybe it's just my interpretation of him, I don't really know.

But yeah, I've seen a lot of people in my native fandom, who hate Choi bros, cause they... care for each other?? It's so confusing to me, as a huge Saeyoung fan. Like, his love for his family always made me appreciate him more, why would it push someone away? Of course he should put Saeran first - he's in a cult for Gods sake! It did made me feel a bit upset at the time, when in the Secret Endings we barely got any interaction with him, but it wouldn't feel the same otherwise. I first fell in love with Saeran during the Secret Endings, cause I related to him so much at the time. I just remember crying my eyes out reading his inner thoughts. I think that's why Unknown and SE Saeran are my favourites, haha. And all of that wouldn't be possible if the story was only focusing on our romance with Saeyoung!

So yeah, sorry for the rant, but I just wanted to express my opinion on the matter. I think false characterization is a pretty annoying problem in all fandoms. And that's just Saeyoung and Suit! We could discuss literally every single character in mysme here lmao

Sorry for my huge essay btw I really should be sleeping right now, but I read that post and just couldn't resist ahaha

It's always something, y'know?

Yes, they're angry and bitter, but it hurts to see people think that's all there is to their character. I don't know how many times I've had to go and explain to people that Suit Saeran is afraid. He believes anger is a sword and a shield, if he cries first, they can't make him cry.

It's not a healthy mentality and it hurts him greatly, and he knows that even if his malice was meant for him, you suffered. He apologizes and you're there to say, "I know, I forgive you, and I hope to stay by your side as you heal and become better for yourself."

Suit Saeran is able to say he fucked up. He wasn't right to do what he did and he pays for it. He may say that he likes seeing you cry and be upset, but he doesn't. He just can't admit vulnerability. He just saw Ray get basically torn limb from limb for loving somebody, of course, he's not okay right now.

He locks you in your room, but God, he'd never tie you up or physically beat you. I know why Cheritz added in the bite to that VN itself because it gets them paid for adding in those elements, but I don't care for that, myself. Because I can't see him lashing out in any physical way. Emotionally, yes, but not physically.

If you pay attention to what happens, the only time he touches you is the bite, when he pushes you against the ground, and maybe if you want to count when he nudged you against the wall? But, I think that last one was more him making you walk yourself into a corner.

And it's worse with Unknown because... God, it's so twisted up and it makes me sick. People should write whatever they want to write and enjoy that content, but if I had a dollar for every time I opened a story about Unknown and it turned into Torture Porn, I'd be rich and upset at the same time. Unknown and SE Saeran were also what pulled me in during 2016, so their characterizations mean a lot to me.

Unknown isn't like Ray or Suit Saeran. He doesn't care for you like those two do. You're his eyes. You're a tool. But, he still finds a sense of amusement in you. You're interesting to him. That's just... yeah, it's going to be a mess when you consider him in romance, but it doesn't need to be as grimdark as I've seen for years. I don't even wanna get into that because I'll just get upset. I just wish people tagged things properly because I get so disheartened looking for Unknown stuff and it's just. that.

And Saeyoung gets this rough, too. People will make him out to be the joker that he doesn't want to be. Yes, he loves to play pranks and have fun, but that's not all he is. Don't just lump him off as that one thing. Saeyoung did what he had to do for Saeran in the SE. I'm sorry that he closed himself off again. But what choice did he have at that moment?

Leave Saeran in the hospital to die? Because if he kept lashing out, he was going to get more attention and focus. Not even Jumin Han can protect Saeran from that. He can't. Saejoong would've found him and he would've been fucked royally. Saeyoung made a hard choice, take his brother from the hospital because if he didn't, Saeran would likely die. Yes, that was a bad choice because Saeran needs therapy and specialized care, but he had two options. Let Saeran die or try to help Saeran himself.

It was a mess.

It was a horrible mess but they made due. I personally imagine them to be getting therapy after things settle and they're able to do what they need to do. God, just. Yeah. Fanon is going to happen and there isn't a lot anyone can do. This happens to every character and we're all just going to cry.

[riseatlantisss]

Fighter

Anon Request : “Heyy !! If you’re still doing this, I’d love a Witcher one-shot where he trains the reader to sword fight ! The reader feels outmatched and Geralt is harsh but patient. Could u also make it a little flirty/fluffy ??? Thanks <3”

So sorry to be so late on this but I hope you like it !! Request are still open :)

You never understood why Geralt chose to train you to fight. You are not a Witcher nor any other ones of those fantastic great beings one can find on the Continent. The reason, however, turns out to be quite simple….

1,4K words - Geralt of Rivia x gender neutral!reader

Low key inspired by this quote.

English is not my first language, please excuse the mistakes.

Your back ached from the hard blow you just received. Actually, your whole body ached. Yep, sword practice with a witcher will do that to you, you thought as you struggled to get back on your feet. The sun was beating down on you. You wanted to give up and tell Geralt you reached your end. But you knew it would not make a difference. Geralt was many things. Indulgent was not was of them.

“Let this be a lesson,” Geralt announced with authority, “never turn your back on an enemy.” You turned over to see him towering you. He pulled you up on your feet with ease.

“Are you alright? I’m sorry, I did not realize how hard I struck you.” His apology was sincere.  You rubbed your back but refused to let him know it actually hurt. Instead, you just nodded and smiled. I can do this.  

“Good.” Geralt responded. “Pick up your sword. Let’s do that again.” He walked away and halted at a distance of ten paces. He drew his sword and pointed it right at you, ready for another round.

“Now remember. You must keep your stance composed at all times. Without balance you might as well be unarmed.” He explained, waiting for you to step into position.  

You clumsily picked up your wooden sword, pointing it towards the Witcher with a novice-like apprehension. You did your best to stay focused despite the pain and tried to anticipate your opponent’s next moves. You never were good with weapons, swords, all that stuff. Your greatest chance not to bite the dust a second time was to use your brain. And you did that quite well, incidentally.

“Now, try and block my swings.” Geralt ordered.

You remained silent, trying to analyse his posture, the direction of his feet, the breeze of the wind, anything that could give you a hint on what was going to happen next, really. He’s going to run towards me in a few seconds, but he will jump on the left at the last moment, not on the right like last time, you thought, adjusting the orientation of your sword slightly to the left in preparation.

Before you could continue your thinking any further, Geralt moved towards you, jumped to the left - as you anticipated - and brought his sword to your side with force and control. Somehow, you managed to knock the blow back with a shaking hand.

“Good!” Geralt said, encouragingly. “Now, let’s see if you can hit me.” You could hear the mocking invitation in his tone. Fearing the imminent humiliation of trying (and failing) to defeat a Witcher and experimented warrior, you tried to talk your way out of this situation.

“Don’t you think it’s a little unfair?” You asked, “I mean, me, a human who can barely hold a sword up, against a Witcher? You could kill me anytime you want just by casting a spell on me, may I remind you.”

“You’re not outmatched because of my abilities, Y/N.” Geralt said, as if it that would make you feel better. “The only way for you to improve is to train. Out in the wild, a beast or a foe won’t give you this opportunity.”

“So be it.” You responded sarcastically, “Let the beast slay me. That’s one way of getting some rest.”

Geralt chuckled. However, he wasn’t going to let you off the hook that easy. “Come on Y/N, stop joking around and show me what you got.”

You gripped the sword with both hands and raised it above you head. You threw yourself towards your instructor as you brought the weapon down with all your might. You did not even see the Witcher step out of the way. The wooden blade of your sword finished its course on the ground, making you lose your balance along the way. Out of breath, you fell down to one knee, feeling the fatigue of this training session surface all at once and take over your body.

“Nice try,” Geralt said above you, reaching out to help you up, once again. “But too bold. You must keep your strikes disciplined. You hand me an opportunity to strike back on a platter. An enemy would not have hesitated.” He walked away a few meters, turned over and faced you. “Again.” He simply said, indifferent to your obvious discouragement and exhaustion.

“It’s no use,” you mumbled, still trying to catch your breath. You sat on the ground and put your head in your hands. You weren’t even able to look at him, too afraid to see disappointment in his eyes. “We both know I shouldn’t be here.” You continued, “I’m not a Witcher. I am not a sorceress. I’ll never be a warrior. I’m nothing…” Tears started to roll down your cheeks, but you refused to let him know you were crying. You felt embarrassed enough as it was. Long seconds passed. At one point, you even thought that he had left but when you finally found the courage to look up, there he was, sitting beside you. He just stayed there for a few seconds, quietly looking at the horizon. Expressionless. It was impossible to know what he was thinking. Was he staying out of pity? To tell you he was disappointed? You weren’t even sure you wanted to find out.

“You know,” Geralt finally said after a long silence, “in my life, and as a Witcher, I run into dilemmas. All the time. Situations where it’s hard to judge, hard to know what’s right, make a decision.” His voice was different now. He had this reassuring and calm tone you so rarely heard from him. No sign of hardness or authority anymore. “When I met you, there was no dilemma. I knew right away that you deserved to have a chance and to show the Continent what you were capable of.” You looked at him in surprise, taken aback by his words. “You think I am training you to make you a soldier?” he asked.

“Why else could you waste your time with me?” You responded, still avoiding his gaze.

Geralt shook his head. “I train you because I want you to be able to defend yourself. Life on the Continent is tough. I want you to become as fierce as the enemies you are bound to make.” He paused to look at you and lifted your chin up with a gentle hand. Your eyes were still glowing with tears, but at this point, you didn’t care if he noticed. “The real truth was that I could not stand to lose you, Y/N.” He was still looking at you as if he was going to say something else, but he didn’t. You were speechless. All this time you thought he trained you to fight to hand you over or even sell you to the Royal Guard or to some rich Lord. You thought he couldn’t wait for you to become somebody else’s problem. He always seemed to be so severe. So serious. But it turned out he cared? About you? You couldn’t believe it. You were wrong on so many levels. You opened your mouth to protest but he didn’t give you the time.

“You fear I will judge you? I won’t.” He said, helping you up a third time. You could hear that familiar harshness in his voice coming back. But this time, it did not scare you. It gave you new strength. “You think you are not strong enough? You are. You have all the weapons you need, Y/N. Now, fight.”

You weren’t crying anymore or avoiding the Witcher’s gaze. You were looking straight into his eyes, feeling an emotion you thought you would never feel again: determination. His words resonated in your mind. He cared for you. More than that: he believed in you. That was all the motivation you needed right now. You have all the weapons you need. You thought as you drew your wooden sword, pointing it up to your instructor, ready to strike. Now fight.

[twisted-imagines]

Hello! I know someone has done a similar request to this on another blog but I was curious on your interpretation: how do you think the Leech brothers and Azul would react to having a crush or a SO that REALLY likes seafood, maybe even a particular fondness to eel or octopus dishes? (My personal favorite is squid n salmon 🐙🐟) Feel free to do whatever format you think would work best for this request!

I personally don't eat seafood much so it may be inaccurate, but I had fun with this one~ Scenario part is about eating their animal counterpart🤭 My attempt at comedy. Why did it turn to horror with Floyd though?

Maybe someday I will stop to just randomly go MIA. Maybe.

Octavinelle and a s/o who loves seafood

Jade Leech 🐬

"I promised you the sight, here it is, [Y/n]."

You pant heavily, supporting yourself with hands on your knees, for a minute all you can think about is calming down your breath, but a burning pain in your throat severely hinders your attempts to. Somehow a guy who was born in the sea and never left it before a few years ago can climb higher and faster than you, and you've lived your whole life with your legs. You feel like your skull is squeezing down on you, putting an immense pressure on your brain.

"My my, someone really needs to exercise more. How about joining the Mountain Appreciation Club, [Y/n]? We could do mountaineering more often and build up your stamina?"

You are about to tell him that he'd better kill you now than make you suffer another climb, but once you lift up your head up words die in your throat. Jade sure kept his promise, the sight before you is majestic.

He told you there is a lake somewhere behind that hill and that flora and fauna there is diverse and rich, but what he didn't mention is just how beautiful it is. Untouched, lush greenery, flowers of all colors of rainbow scattered across all the glade that sway to the wind, strive to reach the sun. The horizon is just a straight green line, with mighty trees towering over a pristine blue lake in the middle of this small haven. You can't look at the water for too long, bright sun rays it reflects blind you immediately.

You notice that your head no longer hurts and you can freely breathe in the fresh air, clear of foul smells that people bring when they flock together. But here it's just you, Jade and wild inhabitants of this sanctuary.

"It's beautiful."

"I expected you to enjoy this place. I'm glad my prediction was right. Feel free to explore it, I've made sure that there're no creatures that might hurt you. Before the sun starts to set, enjoy yourself."

You leave your gear and backpack behind and stride forward, having half a mind to take off your shoes and feel for yourself spangled with dew, glistening under the sun bright green grass. You briefly turn to Jade who is still standing behind, seemingly not turned his gaze away from you. He sends a small smile your ways and nods his head encouragingly as if knowing what thought visited your head. You are positive you've never felt so close to nature and to Jade too.

You can't possibly notice, you're already way ahead, touching the water with your leg, retreating when you realize it's too cold for you, keep trying anyway, but the smile does not leave Jade's lips, it grows wider the more he observes you. He can't tell you yet, but the feelings he harbors for you make his heart sing, they are not like anything he's felt before. Oh, how he wishes he could go out with you like this, spend time together without any care in the world, see you smile and look only at him. But things like confessions and relationships need careful planning, he can't possibly let himself be sloppy when it comes to you. Jade is patient, he can wait until that time comes.

"[Y/n], there are lots of different plants and fungi, unique to this area. I go search for them, can I leave setting a camp to you?"

"No problem, go do what you need to do, Mushroom Boy.”

He can't even be mad at you, what a lucky human.

When a noise of someone's footsteps adds to the singing of birds, with cicadas whining and creaking of a bonfire near you mixed in, you know that's it's your companion who's finally returned. Although you stay focused on your task, heat from the fire makes it tempting to turn away,but you just raise your voice to greet him.

"Took you long enough, Jade! I've had time to set camp and to fish! Look, I caught all of these myself!"

Jade approaches you from behind, ready to apologize for his absence, but before he can the sight in his peripheral vision takes away his speech. The fish you have caught and skewered to put above the fire is certainly not what he expected to see. Not what he has ever wanted to see you do.

"[Y/n], I humbly request you to put this poor thing aside or go eat it somewhere a few meters away from me or I might not forgive you for slaying technically one of my kind."

You force yourself to stay in place before you can possibly turn and face himself. You're not ready to look death in the eyes. And the day was just starting to look great, how miserable.

• If his brother at least has a bigger pet peeve than cooked eels, Jade hates seeing eels being prepared as food the most. Like always, you can't tell from looking at his face, but he's furious on the inside. He can't police what you eat and it's not like few humans consume eels. Still, he doesn't want his s/o eating his animal equivalent, even though it can't possibly have the same self-awareness or intelligence that he possesses as a merman. If you insist and don't try to at least hide it from him, expect some petty Jade in the days following. You don't want to comply and listen to his wishes? Then neither does he, he will find a way to annoy you while staying as classy as ever.

• But when it does not concern eels or their distant relatives Jade is all about you exploring sea cuisine, he himself will never miss a chance to partake in some seafood as well. He smirks when he learns that you also share a common love for octopuses. You understand, right? Not only they are tasty-looking while alive, but cooked and seasoned they're just the best. Cue a distressed Azul hiding from both of you in his VIP room.

• When Monstro Lounge was still new Azul really needed someone both skilled and trusted on the kitchen, Jade became both. He will gladly cook something for you and his cooking is amazing. His dishes and how they taste is everything you've ever wanted from your dinner. Can he also cook for you in the morning and in the evening? Jade says that he should have a very important reason to stay with you for the whole day and to live with you... If your fixation with seafood, sea creatures, and the way he prepares them makes you think about becoming more serious about your relationships, particularly starting them or bringing them to a new stage if you two are not quite there yet, Jade won't mind. He always reminds you he's there for you whenever you may need him.

• If Monstro Lounge menu is to undergo a change you're one of the first to taste any new seasonal dish, made by either of brothers, however, Jade usually prefers to take care of you himself, no matter if you're at the cafe as his friend, quote-unquote crush, of just as a customer. If he has to appeal to your taste buds first for you to consider him a suitable mate Jade will try his best for sure.

Floyd Leech🦈

"Thank you, Rook, I really appreciate it!"

"Don't mention it, Trickster! My humble persona is always ready to help you and hunting just happens to be my specialty. Until later!"

Capricious male from Pomefiore runs away faster than you can question whether fishing and hunting are the same, but at least he helped you out. Your boyfriend doesn't get along with him at all, but to your thought Rook is not a bad man. Or maybe you just have a thing for flamboyant people.

You reminisce about how you recently commented on the college's cafeteria lack of fish dishes you loved so much, only for the male to overhear it and offer you a whole basket of different sea dwellers today. You aren't sure if some of them can be even found in locations of NRC or near it, not to mention actually having it be caught and delivered to you. And for a small price of "remembering his good deed". Shady deals are pretty much a part of your life at this point, but you are sure this particular one won't sit right with Floyd. Well, not like he should know about it anyway.

You get to the task at hand, it is preparing all the goodies that you got. Clams and oysters, crabs and lobsters, mackerel, salmon, squids, and several other creatures, some that you don't recognize at all. You know you will be having a blast both preparing all of this and then eating! Your evening promises to be amazing.

"Oh, it smells so good! [Y/n], is there any tuna? Say there is!"

"I believe I see some! We're having a feast today, Grim!"

With an excited mewl following you to the kitchen you place the basket on the countertop with a small thud. It's cold to touch and permits no smell that fish usually gives off. You're as unfamiliar with magic as one can get in this world and Rook knows about it just as well as the next Heartslabyul student. Pretty considerate of him to cast some cooling spell on it. But you will be doing everything with your own hands from this point, just like you always do. Apron in place, sleeves of your shirt rolled up. When fleeting Ramshackle dorm somebody left the knives too, you take the one that you sharpened prior. Time to get started!

"[Y/n]! It's the best! My lovely, tasty tuna! Let's dig in!"

Salmon's pale orange meat easily pierced by a fork, an alluring aroma of spices surrounds you, you place it in your mouth and it basically melts there, leaving a unique aftertaste. You've missed it. You are no chef, but your skills are enough to cook the dishes you've eaten countless times already. It's due to thank Rook for the amazing evening. Nothing can make it better at this point.

"Shrimpy, I'm home! Did you miss me? I missed you~ What a tasty smell-"

Faster than you can take another bite, Floyd bursts into the dorm, making a beeline straight to the kitchen, lead by the scent of your cooking. You've forgotten, haven't you? Elated about the perspective of finally partaking into your favorite dishes once again after the long while, you forgot about inviting your boyfriend altogether. Caught red-handed; or more like open-mouthed. Floyd stops right before the dining table, watches intently first your dinner, then you. You slowly put the food back on the plate, your nervous chuckle fills the awkward pause, before your unexpected guest stars to talk again.

"Whatcha doing here Shrimpy? Eating? Why not come to Monstro Lounge? Why not welcome me?"

Hit with the string of questions, put under the pressure by the deadpan gaze he is giving you while still upholding that carefree smile of his, you hurry to the cupboard to bring Floyd a plate. The male has already leisurely taken his place behind the table. Back turned to him, you don't feel like you can be rescued from this situation, or at least pardoned from giving him some sort of answer. You know pretty well how badly Floyd handles separation and boredom, since entering these relationships you've become his first and most welcome relief from both of those feelings. Being excluded from your life is rather upsetting for him.

By the time you sit back the grey cat, your only other companion in the dorm is nowhere to be seen.

"I was just about to call you. It's been a long time I have eaten any of these, got a little carried away. Sadly, Monstro Lounge has little of things I like, and I already tasted everything I could."

Listening to your rambling with a placid smile, Floyd hasn't said a thing, only hummed twice, commenting on how he is usually the one preparing you all the dishes at the cafe and now it is his turn to taste your cooking. You hope that the sigh you let out is not visible, the stress instilled by the awkwardness of the situation you got into is slowly draining from your body, making your movements lighter, calmer. A hard contrast to Floyd, who seemingly didn't move one inch in his seat, continuing to observe you.

"And where did you even get all of these tasty creatures from, Shrimpy?"

You hurriedly bring some piece of meat from the variety of dishes you prepared to your mouth to and bite into it, your words muffled and hurried. You did nothing wrong so why does it feel like an interrogation?

"O-oh, my friends gave me this basket, I'm very grateful to them-"

You don't manage to finish your sentence.

"Ah, Shrimpy~ Lying to me, not welcoming me to dinner and now eating one of my kind...

You really want to get at me for something, don't you?"

• Perceives you eating eel dishes as a personal attack, Floyd will make you stop at any cost if he sees you eating one. He's peeved at the sight and starts to think back to things he could have done to you that made you angry with him, or reasons for you to trying to start a fight, you're basically eating him! He doesn't fear a Shrimp like you, but the sight is unnerving him.

• But Floyd does share your fondness for seafood, it's the only food he has eaten for most of his life after all! Monstro Lounge has a wide variety of fish dishes and he will gladly prepare anything to you as long as it's in their stock. And he's a pretty great cook too! And utterly the worst to eat with, he'll annoy you so by taking away your utensils and feeding you himself until you'll eventually either lose a nerve or burst from embarrassment. While Floyd generally loves eating what you prepare, he especially looks forward to you cooking sea creatures, not only for the taste but also to see how a land dweller usually eats them, what kind of recipes you have.

• Will cook some squid or octopus at Monstro Lounge, just before the closing, a time during Azul always goes out of the VIP room to supervise the cafe, and then share it with you, praising the taste and smell all the while, looking at his friend straight into the eyes, searching for a reaction. Encourages you to do so too. It will not end without furious Azul chastising laughing Floyd, and depending on if you like to join your boyfriend in his pranks, then you too.

• If you did something to upset him, but not enough for him to argue with you, expect to see Floyd order a handful of shrimps and eat them in a simultaneously gross and intimidating way. Does he want to threaten you? You don't know if you should be scared that he's eating "you", angry that he wastes food instead of talking with you or amused by his childishness.

• If you happen to be somewhere near the lake or sea, where there are sure lots of fish, Floyd will hunt some for you. Two birds with one stone: he gets to see you happy and hear you thank and praise him, and he can spend some time in the water, trading human legs for his dear tail and fins. Fishermen hate him, he catches what he needs, but all other fish swims away, scared.

Azul Ashengrotto🐙

"It sure is busy during this time of the year."

You have to grab your boyfriend's hand tighter, afraid to lose him in the raucous crowd that is so hell-bent on pushing you from side to side. Merchants touting passers-by to look at their stands, food stalls and crowds that get drawn to them, why would you want to get a picture with this monkey, no, children happy to ditch their parents and go run amok and you don't want to get started on the unbearable heat, today is unusually hot. Most of your vacation with Azul has been calm and relaxed, you greatly enjoyed yourself, resting under the shadows, once or twice nearly lulled into sleep by the tranquil sound of waves hitting the shore. The most action you got was when you showed off your new swimwear to Azul and when you had to catch the sandal that almost got taken by the sea, so this commotion is tiring you exceedingly fast. The only upside is that Azul is still by your side, his company definitely the best part of this small getaway you have.

"It is, yes... But it is to be expected, especially from the main street. Wavecrest Neptunalia is one of the few holidays that merfolk and humans share and come together to celebrate, each on their own land. It's a festival dedicated to praising the sea so there bound to be a lot of "sea gifts" for you to eat too."

He goes on a little rant about the origin, customs, traditions, and so on. You only know just how stunning he looks. You get little chance in the college to see him wear less fabric or express himself so freely, you don't even have that much time to be with him at all, damned be responsibilities of dorm leaders, extra curriculum and other crap. Doesn't Azul not handle hot weather well himself? He's a bit red in the face, and a few loose silver strands have stuck to his forehead, but otherwise, he seems very upbeat. You like that look on him.

When he expectantly turns in your direction you do not show you've been preoccupied with looking at him, rather than listening, although some parts did get through to you.

"You sure did your homework, Azul."

"I always do my homework- Ah... Yes, it's our first trip and you would have no way knowing about it, I wanted to give you the insight."

Isn't he the most adorable and loving man in the whole Twisted Wonderland? To you he is. He may have his own hang-ups, but you love him whole, you can't not to. You smile warmly at him and squeeze his hand, he may overheat if you try to do more while in public, you can deduce as much from the way his face reddens profusely at such small gestures.

"I appreciate it, thank you."

To turn back your head to the street, just in time to notice the sign of some rather intriguing looking restaurant. Perfect, you get to hide from both people and less than nice weather and also eat!

"Well then, you mentioned "sea gifts" - I want to try them, let's find someplace to eat! This one looks interesting."

The interior is styled with a lot of sea motives, the main attraction, a huge barracuda skeleton, hanging from the ceiling. You notice Azul looking around, in the end being pretty unimpressed, humans design and decoration abilities did not meet his expectations. Despite that both you and he find yourself shocked by the diversity the menu is offering. You make a mental note to make sure you walk out of this place on your two, and not rolled out by Azul in a form of a happy, big ball.

"Dear, you know what to order, I must excuse myself. Don't get bored."

He sends you a smirk, before disappearing into the general direction of the restroom. But look at this menu, they even have a separate page for every creature, crazy...

By the time Azul returned you have already made an order, waiting time passes unnoticed, you're too engrossed into your chat, discussing with Azul nothing in particular, you believe you could enjoy being silent with him. You don't mind it when your boyfriend goes quiet when your first dish is served to you.

"Octopus carpaccio, huh, [Y/n]."

You look shocked, like a guilty puppy. Only a sigh follows suit from him. He did forget octopus was nearly the first in the list of your most favorite seafood. You sure do love his kind, no matter the form they come in, he's the prime example. Azul catches himself on the thought that all people dear to him are either octopuses or love to eat them, no in-between. He wonders whether there's some kind of odd curse cast upon him. His businessman smile takes place on his face.

"How about a deal? You won't notice me eating this fried chicken later and I'll pretend this one never happened too?"

• Azul is unfortunately used to be the butt of jokes about eating his animal form, all credits to Leech twins, he's also well aware of how popular octopus dishes are in general among people, mer or not. He's rather chill with you liking to eat something made of his animal counterpart, but no matter how distanced he feels from his merman form he gets nervous at the sight of you eating those dishes, of anyone really eating them before him, and he gets more agitated if you taunt him with it. His hands are full with two eels, he doesn't need you teasing him too, no matter how lighthearted it is.

• Is it deep-fried? Yes? Then Azul loves it. No? He won't see the allure, even if you try to convince him otherwise. He eats his vegetables, but not without a feeling of disgust, he would rather have something less "grass-like", so he understands when you express how much you love seafood, and he's happy as long as it's healthy for you. For that reason he will either feed you at Monstro Lounge or in a really trustworthy place, goes in hand with his little quirk of going out with you to different restaurants and cafes.

• Please, don't tell him that his merman form looks tasty, he will get scared, it's not a joke. If he finds a pot to hide inside first you'll have to persuade him to leave it and then make it up by paying him countless compliments, apologizing is a must too. No, you can't take a bite! Maybe from his human body, but not this one. You don't like human flesh? Oh, mighty sea, help him.

[neon-junkie]

you shouldn’t have kept me waiting

Summary: Sometimes, sex doesn't go as planned, especially when it's your first time.

Pairing: f!Reader x Flaco Hernández

Word Count: 1864

Rating: NSFW

Tags: First time, First kiss, Friends to lovers, Table sex, Making out.

Notes: Wanted to try a writing style a little different to my usual stuff, and I haven't written about Flaco for like 2 hours, and it's killing me bc hes my husband, so I wrote this lil oneshot <3

  You were bored, hunting yet again in Big Valley, dumping corpse after corpse by Cripp's butchering table, hearing endless of comments of "this'll do," and "beautiful!" But he soon told you to "calm down, we have enough to keep me busy for days! How's about you take some time to enjoy yourself? Go for a ride or something?"

 And, well, you did exactly what he suggested.

 You'd been itching to go and see him again, despite swearing you'd try and stay away for a while. Obsession is the right word for it, considering you used to trail up the mountain to see him once a week, but it had slowly become twice a week, then three times, then four. You were practically moving in at this point, but he didn't mind.

 Flaco adores your company, along with a long list of other things about you, and he'd begun listing a few things off whenever you've seen him. "Pretty coat, I hope it's keeping you warm," "your horse is looking healthy, they suit you," "you must be cold, chica, your cheeks are so rosy, but eh, it looks cute."

 Oh, yes, he's pinpoints each and every single thing about you, even the things you find unattractive like the bags under your eyes or the occasional cow-lick to your hair. Flaco hadn't told you directly how he feels, but it's hard not to notice from the way his eyes light up every time you've burst through his cabin door, or the way he soon began waiting in his doorway for you to return from your missions, shouting across the frozen lake to ask if you were injured. He doesn't care about the missions, but you he definitely does care about.

 Only today went differently.

You thought you were clouding up Flaco's personal space, using the excuse of 'work' to see him as often as you could, and although he'd never shown any disliking to your frequent visits, your mind had convinced you that you were a bit too much, excessive, in his personal space. Once a week is enough to work for somebody, right? You thought it was, until you finally entered his cabin for the first time in weeks to see his furrowed brows and a pout across his face.

 "Where have you been?" Flaco had questioned, his voice rough and rugged, monotone like it used to be, back when you first met him.

 You explained that you'd been busy doing other things, your trading company, the bounty hunting work, collecting odd items for a lady you met out West, but all your excuses were literally just that in the eyes of Flaco.

 "I didn't think I'd see you again," Flaco confessed as he rose from his seat. This wasn't the first time you'd stood against him, tilting your head far back to gaze up at the much larger man, but it felt off today, as if your neck actually hurt from looking up for once. "I was worried something had happened, something... bad, you know?"

 You attempted to calm his confusion, explaining that you were fine, just busy, but Flaco still wasn't buying it. Only he finally did the second you reached out to rest your hand on his arm, kneading at him gently, a small reassuring gesture that meant the world to Flaco. He's never really touched you before, the only time being when his hands linger in yours when he hands over payments, and the only time you'd ever touched him was when you wiped some food from his face, and his look of embarrassment is one you'll never forget.

 Flaco's facial expressions alone made it obvious that he was crumbling, and he pushed back at his sombrero, letting it fall around his neck as the cord kept it in place, and dipped his head down to your level.

 You knew what was coming, you were hoping for the same, and stood on tip toes to meet Flaco in the middle. Your hand continued to knead at his arm, eventually trailing up to his shoulder as the other one joined, and Flaco cupped your jawline so perfectly that he had to move his hands to your waist to ensure your knees wouldn't give way beneath you.

 Flaco didn't taste how you thought he would, of rich chewing tobacco or a chain of cigarettes, but of whiskey and the herbs he uses to season his meals. Mint was the strongest taste, and it was rich on his tongue as yours slid across it, Flaco letting out a whimper against your lips, his moustache brushing over the sensitive skin just below your nose.

  Desperate kisses had turned needier and needier, just like the hands roaming your body, eventually dipping down to tug at your thighs. You knew what he wanted, and you knew he'd catch you if you somehow fell, so you allowed him to lift you, wrapping your legs around his waist, barely able to cross your ankles over. The sound of an array of items hitting the floor caught you off guard, and you soon realized that Flaco had swept some of his belongings from his table, replacing them with your ass instead, still nipping at your lip as you relaxed against the wood.

 Everything about him felt so intoxicating, not just his musk or the way he was holding you, but the groan he let out as you broke the kiss to nip at his neck. Who knew a man so rugged could sound so poetic? and he watched with half-lidded eyes as you moved your hands down his chest, trailing over the thick fur of his coat, over each cold bullet strapped to his bandoliers, and settled at his gun belt.

 The belt hit the cabin floor with a thud, and Flaco moved his hands from your thighs to your waist, gently unpicking each button to your pants, though you can sense his eagerness as he fiddles with them. One of your boots is slipped off, followed by your pants and undergarments being pulled from under your ass, letting the cold air hit one leg, and leaving the other clothed.

 Flaco popped a thick finger into your mouth before pressing it against your entrance, returning his lips to yours as he slowly pushed himself in, chuckling at the moan you'd let out against his lips. His chuckle soon turned into a sigh once you got your own revenge, reaching beneath his coat to unfasten his pants, and free his thick member from his undergarments, pumping him slowly as you feel his precum run across the back of your fingers.

 A pair of dark eyes met yours, gazing at you for mere seconds, yet it felt like minutes. Lips were reunited, and both of you spent some time working at each other, prepping each other, finally able to feel and enjoy the other after too many months of tension and frustration.

 You'd guided Flaco to your entrance, looking up at him with lustful eyes as you pressed the tip of his cock to your hole. Flaco pulled his finger from you, "how can I deny you?" he questioned in a voice so deep it made you tremble, and he grinned at your body's response. But Flaco soon began melting into you as he pushed his cock in, taking it inch by inch, both of you sighing in unison once he was fully sheathed inside of you.

 You moaned his name and he moaned yours, cupping your jawline with his calloused hand. Flaco nuzzled you briefly, pressing his forehead to yours as his eyes fell shut, before placing a kiss on your forehead. He didn't say anything, and you could tell he was lost for words, but he soon began thrusting into you.

 The rolling of his hips was deep and smooth, slow and steady, both pleasurable and painful at the same time. There was no actual pain, Flaco could never hurt you, but it was agony having him go at this speed; you've needed him for so long, and now you finally have him, but of course he's going to make you wait just a little longer. There was a smug grin on his face as you began mewling in his arms, head buried into the curve of his neck, his cold bullets pressed against your cheek as you began to whimper.

 "What's a matter?" Flaco questioned in a playful tone. "This not enough for you, eh? You make me wait weeks to see you, and then demand everything at once?"

 He wasn't serious, you know that, and it was painfully obvious as he was visibly biting at his lip in an attempt to stop himself from grinning. What a tease. But Flaco was quick to give in, not just because you needed it, but because so did he.

  If you said you hadn't thought about this before, you'd be lying; you've imagined Flaco railing you just about everywhere in this cabin, but you always thought the table would be the dodgy spot. It's an old piece of furniture, somehow still standing in the harsh terrain, but remained standing as Flaco slammed into you on top of it. You were careful not to knock the candles over as you relaxed into the wood, your eyes flicking between watching Flaco's length disappear into you, and watching the expression of pure lust on his face.

 You were surprised he'd waited this long, seeing as there's been many opportunities to pull you onto his lap, but something must have burst in Flaco's mind when you disappeared for a few weeks, and you wouldn't be surprised if he made a promise to himself to come onto you the second you returned.

 The sounds Flaco made were intoxicating, grumbles and groans at all different levels of volume, but he fell silent as he came. Flaco had pulled you up off the table and wrapped his arms around you, holding himself deep inside and burying his head into the curve of your neck, arching his back over so he could hold you, and be held at the same time. "Mierda," he muttered to himself, his voice muffled by your coat. "Too much, too fast, augh!" he grumbled, and finally stood upright to look at you.

 "I'm sorry," he had said, and avoided eye contact with you as you tilted your head in confusion. "I... I came too fast," he grumbled, and slipped himself from you.

 You had to bite back on your laughter. Really? This grown man, a legend, is pouting like a child because he came within minutes during your first time together. "It's alright," you smiled at him. "We'll just have to build your stamina back up, hm?" you suggested.

 Flaco looked at you blankly before bursting into laughter, placing a kiss to your temple and then your cheek. "You tolerate me too much," he chuckled, and you could feel the warmth radiating from his heart at your kind response.

 "Now, come on," he said as he pulled you up from the table, letting you dress yourself as he tucked himself away. "Let's hear all about what you've been doing over these last few weeks..."

[daisylovesatla]

very rough draft of the start of a zutara fan fic

AU where Aang and Katara don't end up together cuz it doesn't make sense that it would be written that way but anyway, I wrote some pages about what would happen if Zuko's lightning bolt actually hurt him a lot more than it did...my ADHD brain can't remember where I saw that AU from but when I do I will tag u I promise...anyway it's Katara by herself at the palace healing Zuko and then the rest of the Gaang arrives from the Earth Kingdom, where Aang and Suki and Toph and Sokka were all fighting against the fire nation's ambush, cuz it would take more than like. a week probably to get to the same place as Zuko and Katara. Anyway I hope it makes sense I'm tentatively posting the first chapter in case everyone hates it but it's only 3,000 words I think.

(eta the ao3 link)

Book 4: Reconstruction...:)

Book 4: Reconstruction

I need some fresh air. She sighs to herself, rubbing her sore wrists and rising up from the cushion she was kneeling on. Keeping her eyes closed, afraid of the emotions that would flood through her if she snuck a glance at him while she wasn’t intensely focused on his injury, pouring all of her energy into that one spot, both emotional and physical.

It has been two weeks since the comet, and she has been doing all that she can to support him, to try to do something that could in some small way, return the favor for his sacrifice. As soon as her back is to Zuko’s bed, she opens her eyes, and is confronted suddenly with the bigness of this place. The tall, melodramatic metal doors that weigh way more than they need to, the beds with far away canopies rustling above them. Just the mattresses here are the size of her entire igloo back home, and even though it isn’t the first time she has been surrounded by superfluous opulence like this, something about this place feels particularly daunting.

She can sense his pulse, slow, but steady, consistent, as his blood flows through his veins and with it, water. Even when it isn’t a full moon, Katara is able to feel the water in everything, including the people she is surrounded by. She has yet to decide if it is an advantage, or only makes it harder to navigate through the world.

Her legs feel like lead, and she struggles to ignore the dryness of the room, the fires lit in their mantles 10 feet above them sucking all of the moisture out of this space, the lack of water, of that familiarity, making her feel like she is choking, as her breaths become more and more shallow and her heart continues to beat faster and faster, only worsening whenever the memories of that fateful, final Agni Kai come rushing back to her, making everything feel so much worse.

No, I can’t think about that right now. Katara closes her eyes again, and takes a deep breath, trying to replicate the breathing technique Aang taught her the first time he saw her meditating. In through my nose, out through my mouth, that’s what Aang taught me. She tries not to think much more about Aang than this. Too much has happened. Aang is expecting an answer, she is sure of it, an answer she can’t give him. Yet there is a hope swimming just below the surface in her, that this now or never attitude leading up to his battle with Ozai would no longer be there in him, that fire gone, the flames put out.

I have no answer right now, she decides, as she finally gets her legs to take the final steps towards the door. Yearning for a sense of coolness against her increasingly warm skin, she presses her hand against the door, and lets it ground her as she pushes it open, nearly jumping as it creaks and struggles to with each inch that she can shove it open. What is it with rich people and big doors? She chuckles to herself as she remembers storming Ba Sing Se, when things were so simple and yet not simple at all.

Running her fingers through her thick, curly hair trailing down her back, she sucks in all the air that she can in this hallway with much better circulation, finding it easier to keep her balance and move forward. The war may be over, but she is anticipating many battles are going to be fought in the coming weeks and months, battles over territory, freedom, the right to the throne. She has to heal Zuko so that he can advocate for himself, she determines, as she envisions Ozai’s loyal courtiers’ unfounded complaints with Zuko taking the role of the fire lord. She worries for him and she worries for herself. A water tribe peasant, Azula called her during the Agni Kai. Despite her strong demeanor, her ability to inspire other people to recognize their own worth, it is still difficult for Katara not to internalize this when she knows she is surrounded by enemies, no matter how much Iroh tries to reassure her and the rest of them that this is not the case. She has spent far too much time being attacked and assaulted by members of the Fire Nation to naively assume that with a change in power, a change in attitude amongst the people will quickly follow.

Many citizens are still loyal to Ozai. They still see her and Sokka and the rest of the Water Tribe as peasants, as savages with too much power. They are still afraid of waterbenders altogether, as gossip and rumors spread around the nation about Hama in the weeks following her imprisonment. She feels a pang of guilt for how it turned out with her. A Southern Waterbender, alive after all these years that she feared she was the last one, the only one, the one expected to carry on this legacy all by herself. Finally, somebody who understood her struggles, intrinsically, who had fought for so many years to be free, suddenly imprisoned again by people from the same nation that had stolen her away from her home, because she could not let go of her anger against them, like Jet.

She does not want to think about the revenge Hama tried to take on that people. How misdirected it was. How she never wants to be as full of rage and anger and resentment that she would start to do something as heinous.

It doesn’t change that that is how many people from the Fire Nation see her people. She can’t blame Hama for that, it would be wrong to expect any one person to be a representative for their tribe, their culture. “This is all so complicated,” Katara mutters under her breath, as she struggles to breathe, to let herself be free of these thoughts. Her anger, always there, ready to burst out from inside her in the form of an uncontrollable explosion.

Katara barely notices how far she has walked from Zuko’s room, until suddenly she hears a familiar voice call out to her. Startled, she looks up from the floor where she was mindlessly staring as she strolled and sees Sokka and Suki waving over to her from the other side of the hallway.

“Sokka! Suki!” She cries out, as she runs over to them, as fast as she can. “You’re here! You made it!” As she gets closer, she notices the crutch Sokka is leaning on, and her stomach feels like it is full of sand. “Are you okay? I can try my best to heal it, but I’m pretty worn out right now…” She glances at his bandages on his leg and starts to think up the best method for healing him after so much time has passed since his injury. “I’m sorry, I wish I had gotten to it sooner…” Katara begins, but she is interrupted by Sokka,

“Hey, it’s okay! For most of my life you haven’t been able to heal me when I get hurt, so it’s not like I’m not used to being in pain,” he teases, and then lets go of Suki who he was leaning on, as he goes to embrace Katara.

She can feel hot, somehow still dry, tears flow down her cheeks as she relaxes into this hug. While news had spread quickly from the Earth Kingdom to the Fire Nation about Toph, Sokka, Suki, and Aang’s victory in Ba Sing Se, her stomach had been twisted with worry the entire time they had been apart. A lot of it could have been hearsay, and until she got to hug her friends and brother in person, she could not let go of her unease. Hell, the talk of Caldera City was Zuko’s honorable triumph, but nobody who knew the truth of the aftermath of this battle had let it slip to the public that Zuko was in critical condition right now. Only Iroh, Katara, and some of the servants who were helping take care of meals and other menial tasks knew. It would throw this world into even more chaos if every day citizens knew there was a chance that Zuko wouldn’t…no. I don’t want to think about that future. I simply can’t. The guilt overwhelms Katara, but she pushes these negative feelings away and struggles to focus on the present. Sokka’s voice brings her back to the present, as she can feel his quickening heartbeat against her chest, and his tears dripping onto her robe. “We were so worried about you and Zuko, Katara. I’m glad you’re okay.”

She stammers, as she realizes it’s time to break the news to a few more people, wishing Sokka hadn’t let go of her as quickly as he did. She desperately missed her brother, and they hadn’t ever been apart for this long before, in all their side journeys in the past year, and hunting trips prior to that.

“Yes, I’m ok,” she lets the words spill out of her before she has a chance to choke on them, “But, well. Zuko...Zuko got really hurt.” Immediately, she can see the blood drain from both of their faces, and she grabs their hands, trying to comfort them despite not having the ability to comfort herself. “I’m healing him, but it’s still going to take a while. We have to just wait for him to recover.” She smiles, weakly, and fears it looks more like a grimace. “I’m glad you guys are back, though. It’s just been me and Iroh watching over him since the fight.”

Suki squeezes her hand, and the sadness and sympathy mix together in the look she gives Katara. “I’m really glad you’re okay. We’re here for you guys,” her smile sweet and boring into the deepest parts of Katara as she finishes speaking. Katara is taken aback, as her skin crawls with the thought that Suki understands, already, what happened at that Agni Kai, even if she doesn’t know the full details.

Sokka furrows his brows, and she can feel his warmth and fear as he nods in agreement with Suki. “Toph and Aang are in the courtyard with the Turtleduck pond, can we go see him with them?”

Of course, a practical response from Sokka. She knows better though. He is close with Zuko in different ways than Katara, but this was crushing for him too. She tries her best to smile reassuringly, as she fights back tears that are full of frustration and fear and anger and a deep, hollow grief that she hasn’t felt since Aang was struck by Azula, what feels like years ago but was only 4 months ago. In these four months, so much has changed, including feeling ready to face Aang. That kiss, just up and leaving, wasn’t ok and Katara wasn’t going to accept any excuses about it, just apologies.

He left everyone to go off on their separate missions, never really knowing whether or not those separation missions would be worth the danger they were putting themselves in, and that blind faith she was able to put in him when they first met was starting to get really old.

“So?” Suki chimes, pulling Katara out of her own thoughts.

“Oh, sorry,” she blushes, “I spaced out for a second. Um…” she tries to come up with an excuse for her sudden zoning out. “I’m worried about leaving Zuko by himself for a long time, and it’s been about twenty minutes so, I better get back, but stop by with everyone, sure.”

Suki gives her a quick squeeze of the arm, as they both walk off a few minutes after listening to Katara’s directions. Her chest feels tight, and she turns in the opposite direction as them, going back to Zuko.

They still don’t know how he got hurt. She doesn’t want to tell them, after so many instances of Toph teasing her about Jet and Haru, and well, she doesn’t want to hear it. Especially when Toph can feel her heartbeat. That damn seismic sense, she chuckles to herself, trying to let herself joke around a little bit.

Suddenly she is back in front of the door. She tries to shake off her anxieties and pulls the door open, the cold handle no longer soothing her but sending chills down her spine. This time, she keeps her eyes open as she walks back in, and all of the feelings she had been able to push down while talking to Sokka and Suki started to bubble up to the surface again, her cheeks feeling hot and dry, too dry. She wished she could bend a cloud of mist around herself, but knew that all of her energy had to be devoted to healing Zuko.

His familiar heartbeat suddenly found itself back on her radar, and she tried to hold back her tears and desire to just collapse and give up. But it was her duty to heal him. Her duty to heal him, the Fire Lord, just like it was hers to heal the Avatar. There was no way that any Northern healer would be willing to come down to heal the Fire Lord, nor would they be able to get there in time. So even if there were people more skilled, more capable, she knew that in order to maintain balance, it was her job to keep his heart beating.

[linkspooky]

To be fair, Deku saw his friend's brother trying to kill him, so it's only natural that he doesn't care about Dabi's situation /trauma. Something like "at least Endeavor isn't trying to kill my friend"

Okay, this is an OPINION. Please read it as an opinion. 

To be fair, anon.  I don’t think anybody is criticizing Deku for trying to save his friend. Obviously, at the moment Deku’s first response would be to stop Dabi from trying to kill Shoto because he knows Shoto personally and cares about him. 

This is just my reading and interaction with fandom, but the two 2 complaints with Deku’s remark seem to be this. 

1) It’s incredibly tone-deaf. In the same vein as Best Jeanist’s argument. Best Jeanist is arguing that Dabi shouldn’t go public with his accusations because faith in heroes is already wavering. Deku is arguing that Enji is doing better right now, so he Dabi shouldn’t bring up the past again. Both of them are essentially trying to silence Dabi without even addressing what his actual argument is. Yes, Dabi is a villain who murders people but let’s imagine this is a normal situation. Let’s say that Endeavor was a film producer who had used his money and position in society to beat up a woman. That woman came clean about how the film producer was beating her. You’d want to see them at least fired, right? Dabi isn’t saying that Endeavor’s abuse of him gives him liscense to kill whoever he wants, he’s saying that Endeavor shouldn’t be held up as a hero after what he did, and the society that tries to silence his abuse is also complicit in that same abuse. 

The reason to make that case of abuse a matter of public opinion, in that case, is to PREVENT that person from using their money and power to both commit and get away with abuse. Dabi’s argument isn’t that Endeavor abused him so he should get to murder people. That’s not even close to what Dabi’s arguing. Dabi is arguing that Endeavor should not have a position and status in society as a hero considering that he’s used his wealth and connections in the past to abuse his own family. It doesn’t really matter if Endeavor is acting better now. You don’t re-elect a politician who was arrested for taking bribes. Endeavor’s current position as the number one hero requires the silence of all of his victims. 

What Dabi is saying is that the current hero system protects it’s own. If Endeavor is number one, if he has all of that power, then he should be held to a standard above others. But he’s not. The primary interest of the hero system as it is currently is keeping heros in power and in the dominant force in society. Do you know why we know this? It’s literally what Best Jeanist says. We can’t afford to hear this expose on endeavor right now because society is doubting heroes already. Hero society will put protecting heroes high in priority than even protecting the families, or victims of said heroes. 

Dabi’s not actually just talking about his personal case, he’s making a systemic argument. The argument he brings up is, if heroes are given so much power in society then shouldn’t they have an equal amount of regulation? Shouldn’t there be someone holding them responsible for all the power they wield? If there was someone holding them responsible, then what happened to Dabi never would have even happened. Enji intentionally manipulated the system in his own favor, to get his way. He didn’t get away with it because he was a good hero, he got away with it because he used money and power to hush it up. It’s a systemic argument and Deku responds with a personal one. 

Deku responds with: Well, he was a good mentor to me. 

Yes, that’s your personal experience with him. However, that’s not really even on topic to what Dabi is saying. Dabi is saying people who use the system in an abusive way shouldn’t even be allowed to be heroes. 

To be fair again, I don’t think Deku is making this from an angle of “I think Dabi should just shut up about his abuse for the good of society.” I think when it comes to Deku’s characterization he doesn’t have the lived experience of that kind of abuse. If Deku is fifteen and therefore a kid, it makes sense he would only judge the world from his point of view. If his experiences of Endeavor are mostly positive ones it makes sense he wouldn’t really comprehend the bulk of what both Shoto and Dabi have been through. 

2) Deku is a fictional character. Deku only acts as a realistic teenager as far as the author wants him to. I mean if you want to extend the argument of realism farther, then you could say it’s not realistic that a fifteen-year-old would be willing to break the bones in his body, or that it’s not realistic he’s not losing his mind from the pain of having all his limbs broken.  I mean, what do fifteen-year-olds do these days sit around all day vaping? Skateboarding? Anyway, realism only extends so far. Basically, as much as Deku is his own character, he’s also a mouthpiece for the author. He’s written by someone, to say things. Therefore, the things he says have meaning. 

Deku’s point of view might be mistaken. We might see him called out in later chapters. However, it’s odd to see the main character say something like “Enji is trying to be better, and you’re not” because it sounds like the author is trying to use Deku to tell us to sympathize with Enji over Dabi. I’m not even going to call it bad writing, it’s just tone-deaf. It just muddies things. We’re constantly told Deku is a  character who will try to save anyone. A character with an extraordinary drive to save people against all logic. 

We’ve seen in the past Deku to be completely unforgiving to abusers. He’s been also shown to have an extreme reaction to abuse. This is how he reacts to the idea of what Chisaki was doing to Eri. Using a child to experiment on her quirk again and again. That’s... a pretty strong parallel to what Enji did to his entire family. Enji’s actions even directly resulted in the death, either by suicide or training accident of his child Toya.

So it’s not just like “of course Deku would want to save his friend from his murderous older brother”, beyond that it’s just written in a way that muddles Deku’s character motivation. Like just for example, does Deku consider Dabi worthy of the second chance he’s willing to offer Enji? What’s different in that case? What is forgivable and not forgivable? And before any of you say Enji shows a desire to improve himself while Dabi wallows in his own guilt, Dabi’s been like... legally dead and probably homeless for about ten years while Endeavor was rich and secure in his position in society. They’re not... they’re not at the same starting line. Either way, it’s weird, Deku would sympathize with Endeavor and cut off all sympathy for Dabi, considering he at least has taken a strong stance against abuse before. There’s either an in-character reason behind why he’s doing this, which means it’s written as an intentional character flaw or the framing is sloppy. 

(Framing being, using characters and their reactions to events in the story as a guide to show how we’re supposed to react to an event in the story. For example if a character does a bad, often their friends will call them out or say ‘you did a bad thing’ to make it clear we’re not supposed to sympathize with that character at the moment. A story is a painting, and the frame around it draws attention to certain aspects. The frame emphasizes.).

Dabi even says it’s weird not to pity him. Dabi is the direct action of Endeavor’s abuse. Isn’t it sad, that this little kid who just wanted to be a hero was burned alive at some point? 

Just to talk about how it’s written in this case, I think Jujutsu Kaisen does a better job of showing the main character thinking t’s not okay to just lash out at random people and trying to stop them from that behavior, while at the same time recognizing the person they’re dealing with is in pain and that pain deserves to be recognized. 

Junpei is a bullied kid. He starts using his powers to get back at his bullies, and also harm innocent people along the way. Yuji’s first reaction is to try to stop him. 

However, in trying to learn his reasoning behind attacking both the people at his school and also his bullies, Yuji recognizes an important fact: Yuta is in pain because his mother just died yesterday. Yuji and Junpei were both fighting each other before this moment, and yes Yuji doesn’t have to listen to or understand Junpei’s reason why, but Yuji like Deku is characterized as somebody who saves people against all logic. In that moment after it becomes clear that Yuji isn’t just doing this for no good reason, but lashing out in pain, Yuji’s priorities shift. His first priority was to stop the lashing out, now his second one is to offer him a way out. He shows him that there’s a way to deal with his problems besides lashing out. 

There are people willing to listen to you, there are people who can help you. Yuji doesn’t fix Junpei’s problem for him, he just shows him that there’s another way. He acknowledges that Junpei is right to want justice for whoever killed his mom, but the way he’s going about it is wrong, and he can find a better way with them together. Junpei acted this way in the first place, because he believed he couldn’t trust anybody else. He lashed out because he was dealing with the feelings of having lost his only mother literally twelve hours ago all by himself, and trying to pursue justice for her alone too. 

Yuji’s response also tells Junpei he has to stop randomly lashing out at whoever he thought killed his mom, and whoever hurt him. However, he doesn’t tell Junpei that he’s wrong for feeling hurt. He doesn’t dismiss any of Junpei’s problems.

Junpei’s pain is recognized by Yuji, and he’s treated as a person and offered a way out. 

Dabi is instead shut down continually by basically every hero around him, Deku, and Best Jeanist as well. He’s not offered as a way out, everyone’s response is just to try to put him down. 

Yuji actually seriously thinks about how Junpei is feeling and makes a decision on how he should handle him based on those internal feelings. Yuji changes his mind a little bit midway through the fight. We don’t really see the internal reasons for why Deku thinks it’s okay to give Enji a second chance, but not extend the same chance to Dabi. To be clear I think the character of Deku is just fine, however, I would also like the story to dig deeper into his motivations. I would like to see WHY he thinks the things he does or acts the way he does. We see Yuji constantly thinking about the things Deku doesn’t think about, and my response isn’t to hate Deku. I just think Deku would be a better character if we got into his head more.