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#like im done writing it as of last tuesday
cuz-reasons · 2 years
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Summary: Ingo and Emmet's last month in Hisui.
Happy new year! Here's a new chapter!
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Me: I should probably clean my room, unpack, find my laptop and finish the work tasks that were due yesterday
Also me: I think I'm going to hot glue flowers, vines, and ribbons to a basket instead :)
#no my room is so bad it even hurts my chronically messy soul#i moved back in with my parents in May and im terrible at unpacking#so everything is just strewn about because i just pulled shit out of boxes when i needed them and never put them anywhere productive#and i just got back from my summer camp job. i still need to digitize my inventory and write my closing report#it was supposed to be done before i left camp but i convinced them to let me do it by monday#today is tuesday#part of the reason i havent done it is because my laptop is lost in this mess#last thing im procrastinating is ren faire prep#truly its not much prep just adding vines and flowers to a basket and needing to try on my whole outfit#and practice my makeup and hair#makeup will be light bcuz i dont know how to do makeup#so im just doing some lipstick and glittery highlight#and i need to figure out what to do with my hair. i have a tiara that i might see about fastening into the braids#or i may braid ribbons into my hair. gotta test to see whoch one i like better#i am so fucking excited for ren faire bcuz im going with my gf and some of her friends#im so excited to meet her friends and spend time with her outside of the summer camp we worked at together#AND im going to do her hair and she asked me to braid ribbons into her hair so im so excited#i just need to practice some braids to figure out how i want to do her hair and practice braiding in ribbons#i fucking love doing hair and i cant wait to do hers. ive done single strand braods for her before BUT#she has long beautiful hair and ive been wanting to try more braids on her and i think i have an idea of what i want to do#but instead of doing anything productive. i am sitting in bed. doing nothing#(spoiler alert its because every time i leave camp i get treated to a terrible depressive episode)#(its because i lose the routine and sunshine and exercise and social aspect of camp probably)#(now worsened by the terrible state of my room and the passing of one of my rats while i was at camp that i just learned about)#anyway im doing fine. gonna go do something now ig
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orcelito · 3 months
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I'm being like astoundingly social lately. Starting from Thursday last week, I saw my girlfriend, then spent time with family on Friday, then saw my girlfriend again on Saturday + some of her friends, then watched a movie and drew stuff with friends on Sunday, then had a session 0 for new dnd on Monday, then watched anime with a friend on Tuesday. Off day on Wednesday. Then on THURSDAY I hung out with my girlfriend, had a study session with friend group (with mixed success at the studying part), AND watched anime with a friend again. And then today, watched a different anime with a different friend.
And TOMORROW I'm going to a concert with family and a friend, Sunday I'm hanging out with my girlfriend, then Monday I've got dnd thing again (probably? Need to double check). And then potentially more hangouts to come.
It's insane. What is this new social me. I don't think I've ever hung out with this many different people in such a short time before.
#speculation nation#it's fun though i probably will need to slow down a bit to not tire myself out bfkshfkd#the concert and the family thing last weekend are not normal occurences at least.#the movie and the study group were both from my discord server. tho with mostly different sets of people.#i think im at like... in just the past week ive hung out with... well...#3 on friday (plus saying hi to others at the temple but i dont rly spend time with them)#7 on saturday... i think it was like.. six? on sunday? i think. then Uhhhh#4 on monday. i think. 1 on tuesday. thursday had 3 new with 3 repeats from earlier in the week#and today was another person i hung out with earlier in the week#which puts me at TWENTY FOUR....... different people ive hung out with this week....holy shit....#granted on saturday 6 of them were my girlfriend's friends and im not very good at talking in a group irl#so i mostly talked to my girlfriend there. but even if U didnt count them that's still 18 people i hung out with#crazy. mind boggling. im a total introvert so this is like unprecedented.#I SWEAR I DONT NORMALLY COUNT PEOPLE LIKE THIS..... im just like. trying to put it into context for myself#and surprisingly i dont feel That exhausted by it... it helps that only 3 of these days had in person interactions#bc thats more tiring to me than just talking online. physical space takes more energy to emote etc etc#i think this is good for me honestly. spending time with people. not just wasting my life away with video games. you know.#tho i do need to balance it with writing.. i havent written anything since i posted the itnl update#and i rly need to get that reverse bang fic finished....hmmmmmmmm#ah well. i'll try to get lots of writing done next week. next week for sure..!!
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#ever sit like a corpse in your own body?#im doing a job i wasnt designed for. theres this funny thing we do in academia where we beg for money. write in consise phrasing why we#deserve funding. what it is about our project what it is about our personhood that makes us deserving. what we're doing in our present to#give back and ensure a better future. and i can pull together a description of a nervous kid who couldn't read but loved to learn anyway.#who didnt kno how to hold proper a conversation until college and so tried and got better at ppl. who wouldnt let a language problem get in#the way of information gain. who cares about making complicated info visually digestible. and that's a nice story. but it falls apart when#projected into the future. what r u doing for the future? im just trying to continue existing#dont u want to help other ppl like u? sure but i dont have anything nice to say to them. does it ever get easier? no. it probably never will#ur brain was not built for reading. sometimes things r just terrible and u have to accept that. develop a crippling mental disorder or do#something where u dont have to read. see. not helpful. bad attitude. im just too full of blood and broken glass. all my achievements r#stained red and it hurts to look at them. to get myself to function i have to squeeze so tight i can feel the strain in my head. and even#then its not enough. do u kno what its like to spend ur whole life building something only to watch it burn to ashes in front of u? just a#broken machine rotting away underground where no one will see it. but dont let things fester. speak up if somethings wrong. and say what?#lmao i wrote this last night and then today when my advisor was like: hows it going? do u feel like u have enough time to get everything#done? and i had the gall to be like *voice strained high to prevent crying* its alright i think ive got enough time. bc yea technically i#think there r enough hours in yhr day that if i really tried i could get it all done. but that doesn't count the time i spend laying with#thr absolute desolation of my mind. so no. there isnt enough time bc im not doing well. but there's nothing he can do abt it so ya kno#whats the point in talking abt it except to say ya sorry im such a wretched miserable person. i dont kno how to fix it. my enthusiasm is#hidden under layer upon layer of pain. i burnef out before even getting here and im only making it worse#but whatever ill see my therapist Tuesday#unrelated
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raksh-writes · 9 days
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Feeling so tired and lazy I might just indulge myself and take these last couple days of my freedom to do absolutely nothing. I think a deserve it. As a treat
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sunuism · 1 year
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guys literally just need to write the abstract and read it through a few times and then im ready to hand in my thesis... but i get struck with wanting to procrastinate now??????
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the-kipsabian · 1 year
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..i need to go through everything and see how much i actually wrote last month huh
i got so much done hmm
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helenofblackthorns · 2 years
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me vs the assignments I have to do but really don't want to do
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dazed--xx · 2 years
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SKZ Break up Reaction (Maknae Line)
A/N:so I’m uploading this on my phone cause my 4 year old decided to break my chromebooks screen but I wanted to get this posted so I can post the second part to both anyway if you guys have any requests my requests are open any group you want me to write I usually do lol so just let me know anyway hope you enjoy please like comment reblog I love hearing your opinions
Jisung:
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“GET OUT!” You shout, as you feel Jisungs arms wrap around your waist. You can feel his tears leaking through your shirt as he begs you to hear him out. Your tears streamed down your face. “you need to leave Jisung” You growl taking his arms from around you. His head shakes in panic “No! NO! Im sorry okay?! It was a mistake it didn’t mean anything to me” he cries. His shoulders shaking rapidly. You scoff at his words “Yeah for you it was just a fucking tuesday of course it wouldn’t mean shit to you. But the fact that you didn’t even think about me or I don’t know maybe the fact that you werent even single, proves to me that everything youre saying is bullshit. You don’t just go and fuck someone and then say Oops I made a mistake. You made a fucking choice Jisung and just cause it doesn’t mean anything to you now doesn’t mean you didn’t fucking do it and proves how much I cant trust you.” You snap, gesturing to the crying boy. Grabbing the bags you packed for him, you shove them at your ex boyfriend.
“I don’t want to go” Jisung confesses, his hand wrapping around your wrist pulling you back into him; burying your face in his chest. “Please don’t make me go, I don’t want to wake up every morning without you. I don’t want to let you go. It meant nothing then and now please believe me I don’t want anyone else it was a drunken mistake and I will never stop regretting it. I can make it up to you, I-I c-can fix things please—fuck—please don’t make me go. I love you” His sobs take over his body as you begin to pull yourself away from him. You stare at him, wanting to remember every inch of his face. You caress his cheek. Your eyes locking with one another “Im sorry, but I cant trust you anymore and I cant be with someone I cant trust. I want to break up. Im sorry but if you don’t leave. I will” You confess pulling your hand away from him. “Please....” He whines “Im sorry fuck im so sorry theres nothing I could be more sorry about I don’t know how to fix it. But I don’t want to leave please don’t make me leave, I need you okay? I need YOU! No one else I don’t know how to convince you of that” You shake your head at his words “You don’t need to convince me, you never will be able to Jisung, there’s never an excuse and I wont be able to trust you ever again. It will always feel like a lie.” His eyes widen in shock.
“i-I-” You lift your hand, not wanting to hear anymore “Just go, Jisung! Im done you hurt me way to much and I don’t want to hear your lies anymore” You growl. Nodding in defeat, he picks up his bags and makes his way to the door. You hold the door open for him as he makes his way out as he turns to face you once more you can feel your resolve breaking “I will always love you” he cries as you close the door.
Felix:
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NEW MESSAGE: LIXIE💕☀️
Hey baby, just wanted to tell you good morning and I miss you when can I see you again? Its been too long😞
Your heart races as you read his message. Biting your lip you contemplate replying before deciding to lock your phone and continue avoiding him. You werent sure why he even bothered anymore, you knew he was pretending, and whilst he didn’t know you had learned the truth about him, you felt stupid every time you thought about seeing him. You were torn between the Felix you had gotten to know a bubbly sweet and kindhearted person that would give up their last for anyone in need, and the one that, apparently, likes to make bets with his friends about how long it would take for you to sleep with him. Its been a few days since you had been told the truth by Minho’s girlfriend, and ever since you had avoided Felix. You couldn’t help but feel anxious and idiotic anytime you thought about being near him, apparently he had won the bet, you did sleep with him fairly quickly considering you guys have been going out for only a few months and have been actively having sex since about your third date; and the idea that right after he went and reported his win to the boys made you feel dirty, gross, and used.
Your phone vibrating in your hand pulls you from your thoughts. Staring at the screen youre met with a photo of your smiling boyfriend. Pressing the decline button, you toss your phone on the bed lifting yourself to your feet. You stare around your room, pictures of you and Felix laugh at you as you grab the stuffed bear Felix had won for you on your second date. With a newfound resolve you toss the bear on the ground. Your body acting on its own accord as you begin throwing every symbol and memory of your relationship in a large destructive pile on the ground. Sobs rack through your chest, nausea building in your stomach. You trusted him, you allowed him to knock your walls down and he lied, pretended and faked his way through everything. With determination in your heart you stomp your way over to your bed grabbing your phone opening your messages with him.
To: LIXIE💕☀️
Please stop calling me stop texting me just leave me alone you won your stupid bet just leave me alone we’re done.
Your palms were sweating as your phone began vibrating once more. You stare at the photo of Felix, your jaw clenches as hot tears run down your face. You watch as the photo disappears a missed call notification coming in before the photo pops up once more. You sit in place as a plethora of calls continue to come in as well as messages all unseen. With a shaky breathe you turn your phone off, opting to take a shower you trudge your way to the bathroom. Your movements halt at the rapid knocks on your front door. “Babe! Please—fuck—open the door!” Felix’s deep voice pleads. Your hand smacks over your mouth, as you hear your doorknob rattling “Y/N! Open up please” he cries. “Let me explain!” The knocks continue in quick succession. “P-please! I-I c-can’t lo-lose y-yo-you, n-not like t-this please!” His voice is desperate, you could tell he was crying. “I’m sorry” the door begins to shake. You could tell he was trying to ram the door open. “I’m sorry! Please talk to me, we can’t be over we can’t Im an idiot but you mean so much to me don’t break up with me I’m sorry! I’ll explain I’ll tell you everything please” your sobs unable to be hidden anymore “Y/N?! Are you crying? Please—fuck—don’t cry please I’m sorry please open the door please! I need to see you. I need you to listen please open up!” He pleaded. You stared at the door as your heart pounded on your sternum as Felix pounded on your door. You apologized silently as you sat on the ground your arm wrapped around your waist as you held your hand over your mouth; tears steadily streaming down your face not being able to bring yourself to open the door.
Seungmin:
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You stared blankly at the mahogany table, avoiding Seungmins bored stare. “Why did you ask me to meet you here if you weren’t going to say anything?” He questions confusion etched on his features You sat in shock at his words, you weren’t sure why you were so surprised at the cold stoic tone he used. It had always been the same with him anyway always leaving you to feel small under his judging gaze. You questioned the status of your relationship often due to the lack of affection on either part. You felt more like a close friend rather than his girlfriend or even someone he was dating, and whilst you two had never defined your relationship, you did assume from the fact that he had specifically told you that he had considered the time you two spent together as dates. You stared at your hands as your fingers continued to play with themselves in your lap. “I’m sorry…” you murmur, you hear him hum in response “it’s fine everyone has bad days” you shake your head in response “n-no…I’m sorry but I don’t think we should see each other anymore” your voice is almost a whisper but the widening of Seungmin’s eyes has you shocked. “C-Can I ask why? I thought things were going well…” he questions his hand reaching for yours sadness flashes across his features as you shift yourself further away from him “we’re more friends than anything don’t you think” you mumble disappointedly. “Friends?” He scoffs like the term was beneath him. “I’d like to think we are more than friends” he states calmly.
You wrap your arms around your waist “honestly can you name a single time we’ve done anything that could signify that we’re more than friends” you snap. Seungmin leans back in his seat, taking a sip of his coffee. “We go out on dates…umm I talk to you all the time…” he trails as he contemplates more answers only to come up with nothing and letting out a sigh. “It’s okay…you aren’t attracted to me Seungminie, not the way I am to you and I think you should find a girl you actually like” you state sadly as you lift yourself from your seat. “Goodbye…” you mumble as you make you’re way out of the café. Seungmin sat there in shock, a tear running down his cheek as you make your exit. He willed himself to say something, anything to get you to stay. He watched in horror as you made your way out of the door. His heart shattering in his chest as he wills you to turn around and just see him, see how he’s falling apart at your departure. He’s begged for every moment with you and in his idiocy you were wisped away, he felt lost what could he do?
Jeongin:
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“You’re really wearing that?!” The disgust oozing out in his tone. You look down at your lilac skin tight dress and white thigh highs before nodding with confusion etched on your features a pout in your lips. “I-is there something wrong with what Im wearing?” You prod your eyebrow raising in offense. Jeongin scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. You stood in your place, biting your lip in frustration “I mean you look really…..interesting.” He grits. You could feel the uncomfortable stares. You knew what he meant by interesting, reflexively you tug on the hem of your dress bringing it lower on your legs. “Don’t listen to him you look great!” Nayeon smiled as she rubbed your wrist comfortingly. You nod dejected, your eyes not leaving the ground. “I-I’m going to get something to drink” you state rapidly as you rush over to the kitchen. You stare down at your dress, you felt stupid and thanked god you had brought a hoodie. Taking a deep breath you grab a red solo cup pouring a small bit of vodka and adding pineapple juice before mixing the drink. You stare into the concoction, as used to Jeongins temperament and the harshness of his tone you are, you contemplate as to why you had even entered this torturous relationship.
You couldn’t think of many times when Jeongin would speak to you without insulting you in some shape or form. From your hair being the wrong way to you just being too annoying for his taste that day there was always something you did wrong. You thought today would be different, you thought for once he’d actually acknowledge you the way he used too when you first began. Your heart completely shattered considering it was your second anniversary. Your relationship was fantastic up until just a few months ago and now it feels like Jeongin would rather drop dead before even looking at you anymore. You don’t know why you had bothered anymore it obviously wasn’t working. You’ve done everything you could to try to save your relationship tonight being your final attempt and as much as you wanted to give the rest of the night a chance; he couldn’t even acknowledge your anniversary all day and then to greet you like that at a party you didn’t even want to be at. You weren’t sure if you could continue this, you missed your loving, sweet boyfriend. You didn’t know who this Jeongin was. You sighed as you take a sip from your drink. The mixture of alcohol to juice lacking so you grab the vodka bottle once more.
“Sure get drunk so I have to take care of you tonight” you hear from behind you, you roll your eyes. “What? I’m literally just making my first drink” you scoff before turning and shoving past your boyfriend his hand wrapping around your arm “oh and thanks for embarrassing me tonight by the way” he spits. An embarrassing heat fills your cheeks “how did I embarrass you?” You growl a fire burning in your eyes. “You’re kidding right?” His lips are formed in a tight line, you press your chest against his in defiance “No! How did I fucking embarrass you Jeongin?”
“So dressing like a slut to a party where you know your boyfriend and his friends are going to be isn’t a fucking problem? It’s not embarrassing?” He snaps, the glare in his eyes challenging you. The rage filling your stomach you toss your drink in his face. “I can’t believe you! You fucking prick” you shout, Jeongins eyes grow wide at your action. He stood there shocked, covered in your drink, his hands reaching for you quickly with a call of your name. You put your arms up preventing him from touching you. “No! I’m done! I’m so fucking done with you Jeongin! For months I’ve put up with your shitty attitude all because I loved you and you obviously don’t feel the fucking same anymore! You made me miserable and I still loved you! Don’t call me don’t text me just leave me alone. Happy anniversary Jeongin, I’m giving you the best gift I could…you’re single congratulations” your resolve completely breaking as tears stream down your face. You can see the panic in Jeongins eyes, his mouth sits agape in shock. With a scoff you turn to make your exit. “W-wait! Where are you going?” He calls, his voice is shaky. “Babe?!” You can hear him following after you “wait! Y/N!” His voice is shaky as you make your way out the front door, you knew if you turned back just one look at his face would break you. You had to keep going; you picked up your pace as the cold air kissed your skin.
Your car was only down the street a bit you just had to make it there and you were home free. Your heart raced as your legs moved rapidly. You felt arms wrapped around your waist pulling you back into a strong frame. The familiar cologne fills your nostrils, you could feel his shaking figure. “Don’t go, I’m sorry” he pleads. You sigh “please let me go Jeongin” pulling his arms from around you not turning to look at him. “I’m sorry please don’t go im an idiot I didn’t mean to forget but I don’t think it’s something you should break up with me over” he scoffs slight annoyance in his tone. A scowl forms on your face as you whip around to look him in his eyes “you know what?! Yeah! You ARE indeed a fucking idiot! If you think I’m breaking up with you over this bullshit ass anniversary then you’re wrong! You treat me like shit and a burden and I’m just done you obviously don’t love me anymore and as much as I do love you I deserve better just…please leave me alone…” tears stream down your face at a rapid pace, your heart shattering at every word. Your eyes drifting to the floor as your bottom lip finds it’s way between your teeth. Your eyes never once lifting to meet his as you turn away from him and make your way to your car. You don’t see Jeongin standing there in horror as you ultimately walk away from him. You don’t hear the sound of his heart shattering in his chest as you don’t look back at him. His jaw clenched as tears stream down his cheeks willing himself to not chase after you because like you said, you did deserve better
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gisele0127 · 1 year
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Can you do some blue lock scenario with a reader who very much needs glasses? Like reader is straight up walking in to poles, bumping into tables, squinting to read to tweets. They actually never took a drivers test because they couldn’t read road signs or the handbook for that matter🙄 The reader just lives life like this just cause. Like there is no reason for them to just not fail their eye test and get some glasses.
Blue lock boys: Rin, Sae, Barou, Kaiser, Yukimiya(💀), and anyone else you want to write for!!
notes: not proof read!! enjoy :)) THANKS FOR 700 FOLLOWERS GUYS, i’ll promise to feed y’all good when i get back home.🥹🥹
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rin
after walking into another pole while you and him were walking down the street from his football practice he finally had enough.
“get some glasses or im breaking up with you”
you look up at him (all you can see is a blurry glob) confused because why would he say that?
“why’re you being mean? i don’t need glasses i’m fine.”
rin secretly liked that you were stubborn, but right now he’s more concerned. you kept on running into things, needed help with homework and schoolwork because you couldn’t see the board, and bumping into tables and such.
he flicks your forehead (specifically where there was a slight bruise forming), “i don’t like how you’re always running into things. it’s not safe.”
he tries to act nonchalant and like he doesn’t care, but deep down inside he’s afraid something bad will happen to you. he just wants you to be safe.
sae
“i don’t understand why you can’t just get glasses!”
it was the first time sae had ever raised his voice to you, or really in general around you. so what got him to this point? you two had just came back from the hospital because you fractured you ankle from tripping. sae had been getting annoyed by your carefreeness and this was the last thing he needed.
you look at him hurt by his tone, you’ve never seen the stoic man like this. you’re surprised he would even raise his voice at something like this.
he looks at you as if he’s done nothing wrong, keeping the same deadpan he always does. you roll your eyes and (try to) walk away until sae grabs your arm pulling you into his lap,
“don’t walk on your foot, you’re going to get even more hurt. and i said that because i don’t want you getting hurt again. what if i’m not there to save you?”
barou
he walks in the door after a tiring practice to some soup cooking in the kitchen. he smiles knowing you made it, and he grabs a spoon to get just a little taste while you arent looking. little does he know you accidentally put too much salt. spitting it out he says,
“holy fuck y/n. are you trying to give me a heart attack?!” he laughs after.
you look at him embarrassed because you tried to do something nice for him and it went terribly wrong.
he smiles looking at you and tenderly kissing your temple, “after my shower i’ll help you cook how does that sound?”
he sometimes finds your vision problems difficult but he never gets mad at you, he’s just a peace with your decisions to not get glasses. he never gets you for it :)
kaiser
“i set up an eye doctor appointment for you at 12:30 on tuesday by the way. it’s rest day so i’ll be able to drive you” he looks up at you while laying on your chest.
you stop playing with his hair and look confused. “what? why?”
“well love….how do i put this? i’m not your personal driver….and i’m tired of you being so stubborn” he says grinning while motioning for you to continue playing with his hair.
you roll your eyes and continue playing with his hair, you start thinking and you do feel kind of bad that your boyfriend has to drive you everywhere. sure he may be arrogant and cocky, but in reality he’s a lovesick man who only wants the best for you.
yukimiya
(if an ything the roles should be reversed💀)
“do you think our kid is going to be blind?” you innocently ask him one day while studying (mostly him telling you what the class is learning). he’s taken aback but composes himself and gives you a gentle smile.
“maybe.”
it’s a short and sweet answer, but he’s mostly thinking about he fact that you said ‘our kid’. this a sweet moment because you usually never say stuff like this. he gets up from his chair and motions you to come on the couch with him,
“but our child will definitely be wearing glasses, unlike you”. he says while sticking his tongue out.
notes part two: i’m sorry this took so long, i’ve been busy traveling all over! i hope it’s to your liking :) @crybabyyams thank you so muchh:))
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cuz-reasons · 1 year
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Now, I have ended up with 5 finished works and a bunch of other wips so I do need to post smth soon
This all to say I'm posting smth once I get home from work so look out for that
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definitelynuwonhere · 2 months
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“RSVP”
Ok so I was rewatching the wedding, like any reasonable person on a Tuesday and I reached the part where David whispers “We’re getting married today” in a tears welling up cuz im stupid and inlove tone. AND IT GAVE ME AN IDEA TO WRITE ABOUT⬇️⬇️⬇️
———
It was a cool September morning, David and his mate had gotten up early to beat the sun. The roads were calm the given the early hour as they drove towards the cemetery to visit Gabriel’s grave.
It had been 6 years since his father’s passing, and while this wasn’t normally how they commemorated the day, it had been a while since they visited, which would mean it was probably about time they caught up on maintenance. So even if he did prefer to honor him with a trip to the woods, he didn’t mind spending his day weeding and trimming.
They pulled up into an open parking spot, hoping out of the car to fetch the equipment in the trunk as their mate scouted the damage.
And a few hours later, they were done, with David placing the finishing touch of a fresh bouquet of honeysuckles next to his father’s gravestone.
He let out a satisfied sigh, a smile on his lips as he examined the work they had done.
“I’ll just load these back up into the car” his mate said, walking back to the car to give him a moment alone.
David gave an appreciative nod, watching them walk down the path before turning his attention back to the grave.
Six years…it had been six long year since his father died, he thought as stood there, reflecting through his life throughout the last six years. And as he did so, he smiled.
It hadn’t been easy losing his dad, but as he stood there, looking down at what is supposed to be a reminder of the ones you lost, he felt, at peace. As if his father was right there, sharing the memories that he had made throughout the last six years, memories with the pack, and of his mate. And that he was proud of him.
He let out another content sigh, speaking softly under his breath,
“I’ll see you at the wedding, dad.”
“RSVP” (Posted)
Ok so rewatching the wedding, like any reasonable person on a Monday
And i reached the part where David whispers “We’re getting married today” in a tears welling up cuz im stupid and inlove tone
AND I JUST, I JUST IMAGINE, SAME LINE, DIFFERENT SETTING:
It was a cool September morning, David and his mate had gotten up early to beat the sun. The roads were calm the given the early hour as they drove towards the cemetery to visit Gabriel’s grave.
It had been 6 years since his father’s passing, and while this wasn’t normally how they commemorated the day, it had been a while since they visited, which would mean it was probably about time they caught up on maintenance. So even if he did prefer to honor him with a trip to the woods, he didn’t mind spending his day weeding and trimming.
They pulled up into an open parking spot, hoping out of the car to fetch the equipment in the trunk as their mate scouted the damage.
And after a few hours later, they were done, with David placing the finishing touch of a fresh bouquet of honeysuckles next to his father’s gravestone.
He let out a satisfied sigh, a smile on his lips as he examined the work they had done.
“I’ll just load these back up into the car” Said his mate in order to give him a moment alone.
David gave an appreciative nod, watching them walk back to car before turning his attention back to the grave.
Six years…it had been six long year since his father died, he thought as stood there, reflecting through his life throughout the last six years. And as he did so, he smiled.
It hadn’t been easy losing his dad, but as he stood there, looking down at what is supposed to be a reminder of the ones you lost, he felt, at peace. Like he was right there, sharing the memories that he had made throughout the last six years, memories with the pack, and of his mate. And that he was proud of the person he’d become.
David once again let out a content sigh, speaking softly under his breath,
“I’ll see you at the wedding, dad.”
He let out one last sigh before packing up the rest of the stuff they had used. And as he got up to stand, he caught a glimpse of the horizon — how the sun just barely peeked through the mountains and the sky still purple in hue. And the wind blew he couldn’t help but snicker, it was as if it was embracing itself around him, mimicking that familiar presence be knew all to well. It made his hair dance, the icy trickles sending tiny shocks to his skin. He smiled, feeling a sense of pride swell in his chest, as he walked away knowing he’d be right there behind him.
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spaceprincessem · 1 month
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teaser tidbit tuesday
me writing??? less likely than you think but im still doing it (just like 300 words at a time these days) making up for all the other times ive been tagged because i finally have something i can share. anyway here's a lil something from my mockingjay au because im determined to finish it before the end of the year. if you're still here with me and tagging me i see you and love you and appreciate you <3
“Okay,” Bobby says when it’s just the two of them, “say what you need to.” “You left Buck.” Eddie doesn’t hesitate to say, each word punctured by all the white hot rage that roars like a wildfire beneath his breastbone. Bobby nods, neither denying nor defending the choice made. “You shouldn't have let him out of your sight.” Bobby finally says after a moment. And there it is. Both of their failures laid out in the open. They both sat in Bobby’s living room, a liquor bottle between them, and promised they would choose Buck this time around.  But when the smoke cleared they're the ones standing in District Thirteen staring down their last and final betrayal. The only thing worse than losing Buck in the arena was letting the Capitol take him prisoner. “I replay it over and over again in my mind,” Eddie’s voice breaks, “what I could have done to keep him next to me without breaking the alliance.” Bobby’s face softens. “You didn’t have a choice.” He says, not leaving Eddie any room to argue. “Even if I could have made Sue stay long enough to get Buck, the hovercraft would have gone down with all of us.”  He steps forward, his hand hovering above Eddie’s shoulder. When Eddie doesn’t pull away he carefully lays it down, his grip firm, but warm and Eddie wants to collapse beneath the weight of Bobby’s gaze. “He’s not dead yet, Eddie.” But he is, Eddie wants to say, Gerrard won’t ever let me be with him again. “We’re still in the game.” Eddie says instead. Bobby nods. “And I’m still your mentor, so when you’re out there—” “Stay alive.” Eddie finishes, smiling grimly. “Stay alive.” Bobby repeats and then pulls Eddie into a bone crushing hug.
tagging @eddiebabygirldiaz @colonoscopys @dr-shortsighted-owl @monsterrae1 @wildlife4life @bigfootsmom @devirnis @kananjarus @hippolotamus @slowlyfoggydestiny @thebestbooksaround @sibylsleaves
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dramaticweathergirl · 7 months
Text
This is a draft for the gen z! Yuu fic that I was thinking of writing back then. Here's the draft of it instead of letting it rot im my laptop lol. Enjoy...?
----
Yuu swear that whatever the fuck is happening to them right now, is a punishment from god because...What the actual fuck?
"influencer pranks these days are getting out of hand" They mutter to themself, mentally done at whatever bullshit is happening right now.
Yuu's in a box. Not just any box though, it's a coffin, they're trapped in a god-damned coffin. Today was supposed to be a normal Tuesday, Yuu wakes up, eat breakfast and go to school. But instead, what happen was their sleep-deprived ass got snatched up in the middle of the streets by an emo carriage.
Yuu was kidnapped by an emo carriage and is now trapped in a coffin.
Gee, they wonder if that even is a considerable reason for them to miss the Calculus exam that was supposed to take place today. Ah, fuck it, Jason's grandma "died" literally like five times last school year and still graduated. Who's to say Yuu won't?
"Hello?? Uh, I know this shitty type of content is what getting y'all cash nowadays but what the fuck? please let me out, I promise I won't sue y'all or create a call-out post on Twitte-I mean X! X!"
"..."
"hello?"
"..."
"Fuck it, I'll just kick the door down"
---
Dire Crowley, the esteemed headmaster of Night Raven College, is in a wild and confusing predicament right now. Somehow, a month before even the new school year officially began, A student somehow arrived in of the coffins.
In all of his years being the headmaster, such thing had never happened. Great sevens, this situation had never once even crossed his mind as a potential problem! Did the Ebony carriage have a problem? Perhaps even the mirror itself? But both of that would be impossible!
"goodness gracious, where is that child" he muttered to himself, a hint of worry lacing his voice.
Dire Crowley was just finishing his stack of paperwork when a distressed and confused ghost school keeper barged into his office informing him that one of the coffins received a student. The headmaster rushed to the scene right away only to find a busted coffin and a missing "student".
This all leads to him, along with squad of ghosts, scurrying along the school grounds to find the wayward child.
"Headmaster! I found them!" Bobby, one of the ghost staff that manages the cafeteria, shouted with glee and relief "they're at the top floor of west wing's tower!"
He hurriedly rushed (again) to the scene and found the teen in a complete daze, their eyes focused on the ocean's horizon. Crowley cleared his throat and the supposed student immediately snapped their attention on him.
"The island view is breathtaking, correct?" Crowley began, trying to ease them "it's one of the boasting qualities of N-"
"..island...stein.." they mumbled something but Crowley only manages to make out a few words.
"par–"
"DON'T FUCKING TELL ME I'M TRAFFICKED TO AN EIPSTEIN ISLAND-TYPE OF SHIT"
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anurst · 1 year
Text
Girl Bradshaw
Summary: the moment of truth. Can you and Bradley work out your differences?
A/n: oml im so sorry for the long wait. i just kind dropped off the face of the earth. i didnt really have any motivation to write but now i'm back! this chap is kinda short but another will be posted on Tuesday :D
Warning(s): angst, estranged family
Part 9: Sometimes I wish I was 10
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Before Jake, you never really fully believed in cloud nine. Now though, as you giddily walk through the halls of camp, your body tingles with newfound excitement. Electricity practically flows through your veins.
"I take it the date went well?" Amy's voice comes from behind you. Normally, you would have chastised her for sneaking up on you, but for now, you just smile as your cheeks slightly redden. Amy's smile widens even more as she latches onto your arm. "Oh my gosh! You have to tell me everything! And, I MEAN everything!" The both of you giggle as you push open the door to the gym.
The rest of your team turns to the pair of you and it's no secret that they're curious about your date. Carlos certainly isn't subtle as he wiggles his eyebrows at you. Jensen's the only one (besides Amy) who vocally asks you how you went. Just as you're about to recount last night's events, the doors swing open and a panting Bradley stands there.
Silence spreads for a couple seconds as Bradley gathers his breath. Offering a shaky smile, he rubs at the back of his neck. "Sorry for, uh, barging in, but I'm here to talk to Braidy."
When Nolan clears his throat, you roll your eyes and turn to face Jensen again. "We'll give you two a minute," he says and your eyes widen. No way he was actually going to leave you alone with Bradley?
Jensen gives you a small pat on the shoulder as your team shuffles by and out of the gym. The door closes behind them and each step that Bradley takes towards you seems to get louder.
Your fists clenched tightly together as you will yourself not to turn around. Turning around means acknowledging that Bradley's standing less than five feet away from you. The brother who abandoned you and seemingly forgot your existence bites his lip as he tries to find the right words. "(y/)– Braidy, please just hear me out."
"What if I don't want to?" 'Idiot, why'd you respond?'
"I'll keep finding you and repeating what I'm going to say. I'll keep apologizing until the world stops spinning. I know that sorry doesn't make up for the years of pain I put you through. That sorry won't just magically fix us. That it won't undo all the words I said. But, please Braidy, at least let me make it up to you."
Make it up to you? What if there's nothing that can be done? What if you're finally done with Bradley and that painful chapter of your life?
"I don't care Bradley. I don't want to fix us."
"Braidy, you're my sister–"
"SO I WASN'T YOUR SISTER BACK THEN?" you yell before you can properly think. There's a heavy burn in your chest and a part of you think it'll burst any moment. Every breath you take feels as though you're inhaling smoke. Your eyes meet Bradley's and the suffocating feeling vanishes.
You feel like you're ten again. A fifteen-year-old Bradley wipes the fat tears that roll down your cheeks. One hand comes up to ruffle at your hair and he quietly cooes at you to stop crying. Soft reassurances of 'everything is gonna be okay' repeat after one another as more tears fall.
The calm and warm reassurance that Bradley constantly provided for you returns and it scares you. It scares you that after so much pain and heartbreak, Bradley can still make you feel so warm with just a simple look.
It's almost as though nothing has changed and time hasn't past. And if you're completely honest, that thought doesn't invoke any fear. Because right now, in this moment as you stare into your brother's eyes, you wish you were ten again.
Bradley slowly lifts a hand to wipe at the tear that rolls down your cheek. His other hand wrap around the back of your head and brings you closer. Soft whispers come from Bradley's lips but you hardly hear them over your sobs.
"Everything's going to be okay. Just let me make it up to you."
"…You can’t…” you whisper as you push yourself out of Bradley's arms. Furiously wiping at your cheeks, your arms wrap around your torso as you direct your gaze to the floor. "I can't even look at you, Bradley. Every time that I do, I'm just reminded of the worst event of my life. I don't think you can make it up to me, so just, please, leave me alone." You take a step back and swallow the lump at the back of your throat. "I'm happy with the life I've made. I'm happy with my friends and family. I appreciate you apologizing, but I don't accept it."
Before Bradley can say anything, you quickly turn and walk out of the gym. Weirdly enough, the weight returns and it feels like you can't breathe. Walking away from Bradley might be the wrong decision, you think. But, that doesn't stop you from continuing down the halls.
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Taglist: @potato-girl99981 @callsign-cacti @caitsymichelle13 @darhk-angel @madkill44 @cherrycola27 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @clockworkballerina @krismdavis @phantomxoxo @piceous21 @laneyspaulding19 @multifandomfangirll @moron-says-what @rhirhikingston @startrekfangirl2233 @mightiestheroes @gizmodear @meritxellao @adaydreamaway
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jigujellee · 1 year
Text
COOL WITH YU
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(gif creds here)
pairing : karina x fem!reader
summary : karina yu hates your guts, but she's starting to realize she doesn't. | read part 1 here!
word count : 5k 💀
warnings : mentions of death, mentions of gambling addictions, swearing, red flag step mom green flag dad, karina is just not good w her words, shitty non proof-read writing (im v rusty im so sorry)
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your tears cascaded down your cheeks as you watched your father kneel beside your bedridden mother, gripping onto her hand as he sobbed uncontrollably. you both knew this day would eventually come; the doctors constantly reminded you of her poor prognosis but neither of you were ready to accept it.
your eyes shift from your father to your mother. you could tell she left peacefully seeing that her she had a faint smile on her face, one that you always loved to see growing up. as you admired her features, your chest begins to ache as her last words to you repeatedly echo in your head;
“you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, y/n. thank you for being my sunshine even on my darkest days. never forget that i’m always with you in here,” she says as she holds her hand to your chest and feels your heartbeat, causing a smile grows on her face.
“and i love you so much, my y/n. i always will even if we’re galaxies and dimensions apart”
it was too much to take in at the young age of 12. your mind was blank, not a single thought occupying your brain. you couldn’t process the fact that you’ve lost one of the most important people in your life on a random tuesday evening. it’s clear your father couldn’t handle it either, seeing how he hasn’t been able to stop his own tears since the time of death was announced. you move towards him and hug him from behind and you too start to sob with him.
naturally, it would take some time to truly accept the fact that your mother was gone. the pain still lingered for both you and your father but things were slowly shaping up. you found joy in the things you loved once again and you were able to surround yourself with people who cared about you. it wasn’t until your dad had announced that he would be getting married to a literal reincarnation of the devil that all the progress you were making had gone down the drain. how could he remarry so quickly, and to someone who wasn’t anything like your mother?
her name was lorraine. she used to work with your dad and kept seeing him after your mother’s passing. she seemed really sweet and caring at first but she was quick to show her true colours once she got with your dad. unbeknownst to the both of you, lorraine had a terrible gambling addiction. the anger on your dad’s face when he found out she used all the money your mom put away for your college tuition wasn’t even close to the anger you felt bubbling in your chest. to make matters worse, lorraine didn’t seem bothered by it at all nor did she give any indication that she would try and help earn it back, and you swore that you wouldn’t bother trying to include her in your life.
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you didn’t have a large circle of friends so avoiding people was easy for you. if anything, you enjoyed roaming around campus on your own, trying to find undiscovered places to study and get work done. the only person you haven’t avoided was ryujin, a friend you met who lives a few dorms down from you, but that was only because she forces her way into your life and you just always seem to give in to her.
the two of you found a nice shaded area in the quad to try and study for your upcoming midterms. it was silent for the most part with the breeze and some birds chirping being the only thing you could hear, but that silence was broken when ryujin suddenly asks you a question.
“how come you don’t hang around karina anymore?”
the mention of her name is enough to make you stop writing notes. you take a brief look at her before smacking her on the arm, causing her to yelp.
“damn girl, i was just asking! no need to get violent,” ryujin rubs the now slightly reddened area in attempts to soothe the pain.
“but i brought her up because i think she’s worried about you. like, i swear i’ve seen her steal glances at you whenever you and i study at the library or whenever we pass by her”
“aw how sweet,” you say sarcastically, not even batting an eye towards your friend as you continue to focus on your notes.
“i swear i caught you looking back at her too at one point”
“okay, now you’re just being delusional”
“am i though?” the question is left unanswered and you force her to focus on studying. ryujin smirks at her small victory.
if you were in fact looking at the girl in question, it probably wasn’t even on purpose. besides, why would you even bother staring at someone who doesn’t care about you?
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to say you were tired was an understatement; you were absolutely drained. studying for midterms and completing a handful of assignments meant that you were losing more and more sleep each night, and it was definitely catching up to you.
“you look like you died and were forced to come back to life,” ryujin jokes as she hands you a large black coffee and a red bull. was it healthy? definitely not, but you needed to stay awake during your classes.
“good morning to you too, jinnie. thanks for the energy”
“i know, i’m everyone’s ball of sunshine!” she yells, a bit too close to your eardrums for your liking.
“i meant the drinks, idiot”
“it’s okay, i know what you really mean” ryujin playfully nudges your side and you can’t help but playfully roll your eyes at her. you slide the red bull into your bag and take a sip of the coffee before dropping ryujin off to her class and making your way to yours. thankfully, your classes are in the same building so you don’t need to travel too far.
you quietly enter the lecture hall, your mind too occupied with what you were going to study next once you finished classes today. you plop yourself down in your usual seat, not paying much attention to the few students already there. it wasn’t until a granola bar was placed on top of the notes you were trying to read that you finally paid attention to something other than microbiology notes.
when you look up, your eyes are met with a girl sporting a jean jacket with a black tank top underneath matched with grey sweats and topped with a plain black yankees baseball cap. she looked like those girls on pinterest who had such simple but eye-catching outfits. when she looks up, you realize it’s the person you’ve been trying to avoid for days now. she doesn’t utter a word and makes her way down to her usual spot three rows in front of you. you stare at the granola bar for a moment as you mentally debate whether you should eat it or not. the professor’s voice catches you off guard and you quickly shove the granola bar into the front pocket of your bag, deciding to eat it sometime later when she wasn’t around.
this class is one of your favourites as you personally love learning about anything ancient greece, but today you find it difficult to pay attention in class. your eyelids are significantly heavier than usual and you feel your head start to bob up and down. you figure it shouldn’t hurt to close your eyes for a moment so you lay your head down behind your laptop to try and get some shut eye, but it doesn’t last long because you feel the neighbouring student nudge your elbow to which you jerk your head up and find the professor giving you a stern look.
“i asked you a question, y/n”
“i’m sorry, could you please repeat it?”
the professor sighs but continues on anyway, “which two generals were fighting in the second punic war?”
you knew the answer, you felt it on the tip of your tongue. but all you could do was let out a few “uhs” and “uhms” before a familiar voice speaks in your place.
“it was between scipio africanus and hannibal”
“well done, karina. i’d also like to remind everyone that sleeping in my class is not allowed. either show up to my class or don’t come at all, but i don’t want you to come in here and treat it like your bedroom,” the professor doesn’t break eye contact with you as he spoke to the class. you shrink back in your seat and keep your eyes glued to your laptop, failing to catch karina looking back at you with worry plastered all over her face.
luckily you were able to keep yourself awake for the remainder of the lecture after chugging down the coffee ryujin got you. once 3 hours have gone by and everyone is packing up to leave, the professor asks to have a word with you so you sit and wait for everyone to leave the lecture hall before making your way down towards the front of the class. your professor has already packed up and sits on the desk, swinging his legs back and forth like a child in a high chair.
“is everything alright, y/n?” he asks gently.
“yeah, i’m- i’m just exhausted. it’s midterm season and all the profs are dropping assignments left and right, and i thought i planned everything out properly but i’m a bit behind so i’ve been staying up late to finish things,” you ramble, pausing to catch your breath. “but this doesn’t excuse me falling asleep in your class, i’m sorry. it won’t happen again”
“it’s alright, i was just worried. i’m sorry for announcing it to the class, i didn’t realize what i said until afterwards which is why i wanted to speak with you briefly to apologize,” you give a small smile and tell him not to worry about it. he dismisses you and reminds you take breaks when you can. it felt nice to have a professor care for their students, which was another reason why you enjoyed this class so much.
you feel a bit better after speaking with your professor; your steps felt lighter and you suddenly felt energized to get some studying done so you plan to head for the library. but unfortunately, the campus goddess had also wanted to have a word with you after class seeing that she waited for you outside. you attempt to walk in the opposite direction but karina is quick to follow you with a skip in her step.
“hey, i practically saved your ass in there,” she boasts, now trying to walk backwards since you wouldn’t stop walking. “now we’re even after what you did last time” you felt your eyes roll at her comment and you pick up your pace to move past her and get to the library. you’re stopped yet again when you feel her slender fingers tightly wrap around your wrist, pulling you back to face her.
“can you stop ignoring me for once? i just want to talk to you”
“let go, you’re hurting me” karina looks down and her eyes widen at how strong her grip was on you, and she’s quick to drop your wrist.
“sorry. where are you off to in such a hurry anyway?”
“cut the bullshit karina, what do you want to say?” the purple haired girl purses her lips and inhales deeply through her nose before continuing.
“why do you have so much hatred towards me?” you look at her completely baffled, then laugh in disbelief.
“are you serious? you’re asking me why i hate you, when you’re the one who did it first? don’t you remember what you said to me when i was asked to help you with your catch up assignments? you said you were going to get your grade up, with or without my help, and then you’d be through with me. and let’s not forget all the times you shut me down when all i wanted was to be your friend and be close to you, yet you want to stand here in front of me want and ask why i hate you? damn i didn’t take you for an idiot, karina,” the last sentence struck a chord in the girl.
“excuse me?” it was karina’s turn to act baffled. “i was just stressed and having a really difficult time, but clearly you wouldn’t understand that because of how cold and ignorant you are,” she responds, voice slightly raised. if you think people weren’t staring at you before, they definitely were now.
“oh yes, because you, of all people, definitely understand how i’m feeling just because you overheard that one phone call, right? like be fucking for real” karina’s words begin to sink in and only then does she realize the weight of her words; this isn’t how she wanted this conversation to go at all. you walk closely towards her and you watch karina uncross her arms and keeps them at her sides once your faces are merely inches apart from each other.
“don’t make comments about my personal life because i don’t make comments about yours. (shoutout ate bobbie, iykyk) i never wanted to hate you karina, i’m just here returning the fucking favour,” you push past the girl and leave her in a now crowded corridor with people whispering around you trying to understand what just happened. the campus goddess clenches her fists and tries to fight back the tears that were forming in her eyes. she was reminded of when you yelled at her the last time, saying the same thing: that you wanted absolutely nothing to do with karina.
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after your little spat with karina, your week has been anything but good. you lost all your motivation to study, you started to skip a few of your classes and opted to stay at your dorm because you couldn’t deal with any human interaction right now. you replay the fight over and over in your head, and you honestly find it hard to believe that one person can have such a drastic effect on your mood.
you stay in bed after hearing your alarm go off, staring at the ceiling. it’s been your dream to come to this school but you clearly weren’t enjoying the experience to the fullest. you’re miles away from your dad, you have a demon of a step mother, and the prettiest most popular girl on campus hated you and you still don’t even have any clue as to why. your first year at smu wasn’t anything like college life in the movies and a part of you was starting to regret coming here.
letting out a deep sigh, you turn to your side and find the framed picture of your mom sitting on your nightstand. you reach to grab it and gloss over her features, her smile standing out to you the most as many would say that you have her smile. tears start to trickle in and you pull the frame close to your chest, hoping that you could somehow feel the warmth of her hugs once more.
“i miss you so much, mom. i wish you were here to tell me things will be okay.”
you stay like that for a few minutes, your tears now drying on your face. you feel the weight of your eyelids become heavier and you could feel yourself drifting into sleep yet again, but your phone begins to violently vibrate. thinking you must’ve set another alarm by mistake, you reach to grab the device and find it’s not an alarm but a phone call. as you usually do with lorraine, you answer the phone but say nothing until she speaks first.
“i’ve been trying to call you for ages now! why aren’t you picking up your phone? i swear to god y/n, you will be the reason for your father’s death with all the stress you’ve been causing him!”
“how do you know you’re not the one causing him to stress?”
“please sweetie, you wouldn’t know how much i do for him since you rarely ever check in with us”
“oh i check in with him all the time, it’s just you i don’t check in with. you’re no one to me”
“you’re such an ungrateful little prick, you know that? you’re just like your mother, you’re both just so unreliable and you leave your poor father all alone here and-”
“god, just shut the fuck up!” you spring up in bed, clutching the picture frame tightly out of anger.
“my parents wanted me to come here! they knew it was always my dream to come to smu, but after your dumbass self spent all the money we had on your stupid gambling addiction, he had to work a shit ton of jobs just so he could pay for me to go to school! and what did you do? what did you do besides stay at home, unemployed, gossiping with your friends over the phone on the couch every fucking day?” your vision becomes more blurry by the second due to the new rush of tears threatening to spill from your eyes.
your relationship with your dad became a teeny bit rocky after announcing his marriage with lorraine, but it wasn’t completely terrible. you didn’t have the heart to hate your dad for meeting someone new. if anything, you understood that you had to rely on each other more than ever because he’s all you have left and you didn’t want some random lady to get in the way of that.
one day, your dad walks into your room and sits beside you on your bed where he hands you a plane ticket and what looked like an admission’s folder with smu’s crest on the front.
“i’ve saved up enough for your first two years, and i’ll continue working hard so you can finish altogether. i know it’s always been your dream to study at smu and i don’t want you to lose this opportunity because of financial setbacks”
“but i don’t want leave you here dad, i’m fine attending somewhere nearby. i just don’t want you to be alone with her,” you protest as you wrap your arms tightly around him. he leaves a soft kiss on your temple reassuring you that he’ll be fine, and made you promise to call him everyday.
“you’re going to make mom and i proud like you always do, y/n. don’t worry about me, just live your dreams for the both of us”
you aggressively wipe your eyes before continuing to yell into the phone mic.
“if you think you’re my dad’s knight in shining armour who saved him, then you’re so delusional. don't speak about me or my mother again, and for fuck's sake, stop calling me! i don’t need you to check in on me and i don’t need you in my life!” you hang up without letting her utter a word in, making sure to block her number right after. you fall back onto your bed with tears falling one after the other, these ones being out of anger and not sadness.
your phone begins to ring again and you nearly throw it across the room, but seeing that it was your dad calling, you immediately pick it up.
“hi my lo- wait, are you crying? why are you crying, what happened?”
“nothing dad, lorraine just called. again.” you hear your father sigh and watch as he pinches the bridge of his nose.
“i’m so sorry sweetie, i tried making it clear to her that you didn’t want her contacting you, but she’s still stubborn as per usual”
“why are you still with her?”
“to be honest, i don’t know. if i knew she was going to act like this, especially with you, i wouldn’t have gotten married in the first place. i’m seriously considering filing a divorce,” his response slightly shocks you.
“well, don’t divorce her because of me. if you like her, then you like her and i don’t want to get in the way of that”
“honey, you know you come first before anything and anyone. both you and your mom,” you begin to feel a warm, fuzzy feeling in your chest at the mention of her. it’s silent for a moment before you ask a question you’ve been wanting to ask for sometime now.
“do you miss mom?”
“oh y/n, i miss her every single day. i still can’t find it in my heart to believe she’s really gone”
“you were so in love with her, weren’t you?”
“were? i am still very much in love with her. there is no one else in this world that could possibly make me feel the way your mother did. although there’s a possibility of meeting new people, no one else will come close to her” you smile at the words being spilled by your dad. it was so endearing to hear him speak about his love for your mom and it eases your mind knowing that he hadn’t easily replaced her with someone like lorraine.
“there’s the pretty smile i love so much,” you giggle at your dad's sudden comment, your eyes meeting his own along with his signature big and toothy grin.
“i love you dad”
“i love you too, sweetie. it’s you and mom in my heart forever, okay?” you nod your head and flash him another smile.
“i’m coming home once the semester ends so text me what you want me to bring home”
“that’s my girl! and don’t stress too much. i’m okay, you’re okay, and everything is going to be okay. i got you always,” he blows you a kiss and waves goodbye before hanging up, the anger from earlier dissipating almost immediately.
you don’t realize you’re still holding onto the picture of your mom even after both phone calls. you look at it one more time and replicate the smile that your mother had before giving the picture a soft kiss and placing it back in its spot on the nightstand. with a sudden surge of energy and motivation thanks to your dad, you decide to be productive today and start by cleaning yourself and your room, which was a complete disaster due to midterm season.
once you’ve finished your little reset moment, you hear a knock on the door. you weren’t expecting anyone so you’re taken aback slightly at the sudden visitor. twisting the doorknob with much hesitation, you open the door and find no one there to your surprise. you peek your head out and look in both directions to see who it was, but you only caught glimpse of what looked like a jean jacket turning the corner. at first, you think you were just being pranked but once you look towards the ground, you find a shin ramen cup and some spam with a sticky note reading “don’t skip your meals. you can’t live on coffee and red bull forever - rn” you bring the items in and begin to prepare the food while thinking of who rn could possibly be.
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the following days were spent entirely in the library trying to catch up on school work. thankfully, you were able to get your assignments out of the way and you had time to focus on just studying now. you make your way to your usual spot in the library, large coffee in hand and headphones on your head, but you notice someone is already sitting there. you recognize the purple hair that was tied in a messy bun under a familiar black baseball cap. it had been awhile since you fought with the girl, so you were hesitant to approach her and tried to look for other seats in the library. to your demise, other tables and areas were fully occupied except for the seat across from her, so you walked towards the empty spot anyway.
karina has her headphones on as well so she doesn’t hear you approach her. she’s startled once she noticed someone take the seat in front of her, but she’s even more surprised at who takes the seat.
you don’t say anything and even avoid any eye contact with her, but you can feel her piercing gaze as she watches you like a hawk while you unpack your things. as soon as you get settled, karina takes her headphones off and taps you lightly on the hand, motioning for you to take your headphones off too indicating that she wanted to talk. you pause your song and take them off like she requested and karina takes a deep breath before speaking, as she usually does with you.
“i understand if you still do not wish to speak to me after this, but please hear me out this one time” she’s barely whispering and you need to lean in a bit closer to fully hear her. but you stay silent and she takes it as her cue to continue.
“growing up, my mom always pushed me to study and work hard. i rarely left my house, and if i did, it was just with family. when i came here to smu, i finally had the freedom to do whatever i want whenever i want, but unfortunately, that mindset of constantly needing to do well and staying independent still stays with me. i’ve lost a lot of friends because of it; i lost you because of it,” she shyly admits. “but that should not be an excuse for how i’ve been treating you since you got here, and i’m really sorry. you just wanted to be close with me and you wanted to help me but i pushed you away without any warning, which isn’t fair to you at all”
you nod your head when she spoke to show that you were really listening and trying to understand what she was saying. it takes some time to figure out what to say to karina, but she patiently waits for you to formulate your response which surprises her at first.
“you remind me of my mother. she was hardworking, independent, and very beautiful too,” karina’s cheeks feel warm at the sudden compliment and you try to hide your smirk when you see the tips of her ears go red.
“but just like you, she also pushed away those who cared about her the most. even when she was confined to a hospital bed, suffering and hurting, she always told my dad and i that she was fine with the biggest smile on her face. i knew she wasn’t, but she didn’t want us to worry. she didn’t want us to think about when her time finally comes” the girl stays silent just like you did, letting the words fully sink in as she waits for you to continue.
“but if there’s anything thing my mom taught me, it’s to not give up on people so easily which is why i kept trying to be friends with you. looking at it now, maybe i came off way too strong at first with all the gifts, and it’s my fault for not realizing that. but like you said, it doesn’t excuse your behaviour towards me” karina purses her lips and brings her head down, ashamed to face you because of her past actions. but she quickly shoots her head up and asks if there's anything she could do to make it up to you.
“let me take you on a date” karina’s eyes widen and her cheeks are fully flushed, you can’t help but smirk at the girl.
“a date? like, a romantic date? or-”
“it doesn’t need to be romantic. just two people, getting to know each other and seeing where it takes them” karina regains composure and tries to act like she didn’t just freak out a second ago.
“do you have a crush on me, y/n?” she says with fake confidence.
“you intrigue me," you admit bluntly. "i want to know more about the campus goddess and i’d be lying if i said i didn’t think of you from time to time”
“well, i could say the same thing. i wouldn’t have gone out of my way to feed you if i didn’t have any interest in you,” you raise your eyebrow in confusion, unsure of what she meant. you don’t recall talking to karina prior to this conversation so it was practically impossible for her to have fed you. it’s karina’s turn to smirk as she finds your confusion slightly amusing, but it immediately clears up once she messily attempts to write rn upside down in your notebook. you simply smile at the memory of finding food in front of your door.
the rest of your time in the library is spent studying because you learned you both had been slacking off due to the emotional distress of being angry at each other. you agreed to study for a few hours before grabbing a bite to eat together, and as you watch a focused purple-haired campus goddess scrunch her nose while trying to write her study notes, you realize that college was going to be one hell of an experience after all.
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a/n: i am so sorry this took so long to put out.... but i hope u enjoyed it nonetheless :') i love u all sm
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