#like i love the ones ive got i care about them immensely its just like. hey guys. sorry i think

[47-protons]

I'm winning against the owl

[unfunnyaceartist]

I love the internet

Its just some people on here that I dislike.

I think the internet was an incredible thing to happen that changed countless lives across the globe! It makes things easier. You can find people who understand you, share creations, share interests, share thoughts, buy, sell, show, perform, comfort people, help people, make friends, get support, start a business, spread awareness, and much more! Its a powerful tool that is often underappreciated. It is a PRIVILEGE. Not a right.

Now there are some people who use the internet to harm rather than help. Some choose the veil of anonymity to harass people. Some abuse and manipulate people. Some share hateful or inappropriate content, even though they're well aware of children on the internet.

With all of the amazing advantages technology brought us, came people who sought to use it in overall not good ways. Now more than ever its easier to come across something traumatic, inappropriate, cruel, scary, manipulative, illegal, and horrific things. All it takes is one wrong click for a child in elementary school to stumble across 18+ websites. All it takes is one typo to ruin a persons innocence. All it takes is one "prank" to traumatize someone. Im grateful my parents limited my internet access as a child. I know for a fact I would have stumbled upon some stuff that would have near irreversibly altered my mind. Lots of totally cool and normal things exist for certain audiences that arent really unethical, but the thing is, a lot of sites wont make sure of age. Most just have you click a checkbox that you are 18 or older. Its irresponsible in my opinion.

I'm going to make one example of my last point using a game im very familiar with that isnt a huge issue: Doki Doki Literature Club. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!! also this is so unlike me lmao. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I GOT ANYTHING WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM BAD AT WRITING SO HFUKJSGJh

It is a FANTASTIC indie psychological horror game with many interesting aspects and dark topics. The problem? Its marketed as a dating simulator with a cutesy style. A kid who failed to read more or heard from a friend saying to check it out as a prank (the latter happened to me) can easily download the original free game. Well, no biggie, right? It has a warning at the beginning, so it should be fine, right? Wrong. Lets take a look at the disclaimers.

Do you see that? "This game is not suitable for children or those who are easily disturbed" and "Individuals suffering from anxiety or depression may not have a safe experience playing this game." Now Ive played this game more times than I can count. Ive done every route, ive gotten every ending, i've gotten every secret,I even used to have a lot of the dialogue memorized, so trust me when I say, yes, this game can be incredibly unsettling at times, but its not the worst thing one can encounter. However its easily accessible as its completely free. The issue with the warning screens is a few things. One, you literally can just click through them without reading them like many do. Two, people may only skim the text or not care enough to go to the link. Three, IT DOES NOT SPECIFY WHAT IS DISTURBING!!! Lets take another look at the first warning: "This game is not suitable for children or those who are easily disturbed". Well, this game is marketed as a a cute highschool dating sim. For all parents or children know it could just be a bit spicy, and I know from experience, kids usually think they're grown enough to handle these things. What if a child goes in expecting a makeout scene when they go to Sayoris room to check on her before the festival only to find her corpse? Now what about the other warning? "Individuals suffering from anxiety or depression may not have a safe experience playing this game." And then it gives a link for content warnings. yes, this is better than the first IMMENSELY but the problem still stands that for all they know it could just have high stress parts or mention things like abuse or breakups or intercourse which can be triggering to some, and lets be honest, how many kids do you think will actually go to the website to read the content? Probably little to none unless their guardian figure makes them. I played this game in late fifth grade, and I thought I was practically an adult. Oh how wrong I was, BUT THATS OFF TOPIC. It would be much more beneficial and logical to just say 'this game covers dark, disturbing, and triggering topics and contains graphic content.' or something along those lines, OR EVEN VERIFY THEIR AGE. Without proper research an elementary schooler who was pranked by their friends (like me) could easily be traumatized. Im very glad I did research on it prior to my gameplay.

MY POINT IS THE INTERNET NEEDS MORE SAFETY AND STUFF BUT NOTHING STUPID LOL OKAY BYE SORRY FOR THE ABRUPT ENDINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

[dawning-day]

top 15 tv shows (in no particular order except i did number them bc otherwise i would forget to do 15)( love u @soleadita and fuck with the icon change immensely)

crashing (2016) call me marissa cooper the way i am ruthlessly stealing this pick but yeah it's. it's insane and fantastic and terrible and beautiful and so much happens so fast but its so so important to me

inside job (it's gross and weird and funny and sad and it's one of the only times i was genuinely upset when i heard about a show being cancelled)

young justice (pointing at an on fire garbage can - this is my son and i love him)

gilmore girls (comfort media of all time what else do you need)

bob's burgers (similar to the above it's very i am falling asleep to the weird bisexual man who is a mess at all times except for how much he loves his family)

fleabag (why yes i have a perfectly normal relationship with the catholic church and the concept of being truly known. why would you ask. and yeah i real life cried)

yuri on ice (idk if anime counts but fuck around and find out this is My List (tm)) ((it's beautiful and soft and lovely and sad and stressful and i listened to the instrumental track so many times it was on my spotify top songs. it's literally just a piano and a boy with a dream and i have wept about it))

given (it's the first anime i ever watched all the way through which in retrospect, fucking insane way to come out of the gate. as a Band Kid (tm) who wanted to be a theater kid but was bad at speaking in front of groups of people, this show did a lot to my psyche in the best way possible)

will (enough with the tears its time for something almost embarrassingly niche. in 2017 TNT had a drama series about william shakespeare and to this day it remains one of the greatest things ive ever seen. jamie campell bower plays the sluttiest version of christopher marlowe you've ever seen in your life. it's chaotic and ridiculous and i absolutely adore it. i have no idea where to find it im pretty sure they want us to forget it exists but i cant)

numb3rs (silly little show about a nervous man who solves murder with the power of math and being a pathetic little wife guy to the hottest woman ive ever seen. theres an episode about trains that i think rewired something in my brain)

white collar (look at me. obviously im a white collar guy. come on now)

invincible (i think ive seen the pilot episode like 4 times. i genuinely think it redefined to me what superhero media could be. oh i adore it more than anything. it's only 9 because i haven't seen season 2 yet but holy shit. holy shit. media of all time. if you want to know me fundamentally and wholly please watch the pilot. i'll watch it again anytime im not kidding)

teen titans (cherished childhood media of all time. only group of people who have ever understood dick grayson)

bridgerton season 2 (i'm bias on account of just finishing it yesterday but holy shit two people have never been in love like they are in love)

the flash (cw) (im sorry to both my mother and god for this one but unfortunately i don't have taste and also it's the reason i started caring about dc in the first place which is the reason i got back on tumblr and met all the cherished gay people in my telephone so yeah. barry allen's allowed to be cringe as fuck i owe him everything)

leo already tagged everyone i know on here but if u see this pls do it and @ me im nosy

[hirokiyuu]

actually i changed my mind i'm doing liner notes while fic is stlil fresh in my brain

i wanted so so badly to title this "how could i ever be so dumb to believe i'd be the one you would adore" but it was too long. heartbreaking. this would still have been such a baller title. i did consider "the one you would adore" but i think the title i settled on was better lol

i also wanted to use smth from no love in february which is also pretty dyssol for this exact scenario u kno. wnating sol to have reached out to him and hten not getting it <3 "where were you when i needed to hear you say / turn around i'm right behind you!" all that shit its soooo good for htem tbh

originally sym emerged "from the shadows of the forest" and my beta was like "there's no forest this is the ridges, the whole point is there's no forest" and i had to pull up the literal in-game text that has him emerging, quote, "from the shadows of the forest." they were so angry it was immesnely funny. i did cut it tho bc it's technically inconsistent w/worldbuilding LMFAO

i kind of wish it'd come up more but part of this sol is characterized by being unaugmented. real fucked up that people just give u extra kudos for not being augmented lmfao i do think abt that as the perk a lot

this sol's also super poly. i wanna go into this in another ficlet maybe but she was genuinely really vibing with dys's crush on sym from the start (which is part of the reason he was confused abt whether or not she liked him, lol)

originally this run was gonna be ot3 but i fucked up the timing of sym's last event but honestly? ive mentioned this before but hinge poly sol/dys/sym? does vibe. tfw ur boyfriend is clearly in love w/ur girlfriend who shes not dating also and u jsut ahve to deal w/that

a lot of the convo ended up rearranged from canon to better flow, and some stuff got cut. im still SO sad i couldnt work in dys droppign his entire dinner in the fire thats like one of my favorite parts. dyssol is best when they are both STupid <3

also sad in retrospect i had to cut the whole "where were you" but again it did not fit. i just wanted them yelling stupidly at each other tbh LAKHSGLKAHSLDKG

so i wrote this entire fic out of order starting with "you absolute spacehead, i am in love with you" which means when i wrote the part where sym cuts in my beta, who never got this scene, went SYM WAS JUST THERE? and i was like. yeah. thats canon btw thats part of the canon scene. and they lost it

"i am so stupid into you, i love you more than anything or anyone in this whole dumb universe" as a dramatic love confession is fun i think. simultaneously very like...... desperate and aching and also kind of stupid u kno. very nineteen of her. one of my fave lines from this in general tbh

the funniest possible note from my beta on the middle of the kiss

"i want all those kids tammy and i picked out dumb names for when we were nine" is another personal fave lmfao. again. dumb teens trying to talk abt the future and what they want

it was really important to me that sol didn't look pretty while she was crying. snotty + wet-faced and kind of ugly about it u kno. dyssol are a little gross and they love each other about it! it's aprt of the love

ive always thought abt dys not having anyone to find him on the spaceship (if hes not sols childhood friend) and connecting that to him disappearing on the ridges. the vibes. impeccable. of course he goes home with sol then if they ask, it's the first time anyones come looking. god. (thinking abt dyssol) GOD

dys: hey does anyone think its weird youer both just dating me now. no? just me? okay

i mean obviously the polyam negotiations DO come but again. this sol+sym in general are both just like. sweet more people to love dys

i didnt tag this as marz+dys or utopia+dys but it is immensely importnat to me that he has multiple people who love and worry and care for him. marz fucks up a lot as kids but i like how if u try to bully dys in her 10 shes like :/ no you moron im trying to KEEP him from dying :////

"clinging like he's five years old" This One Was On Purpose

originally at the end there was a joke sol made abt jumping him but it didn't fit tonally. i do think its immensely funny conceptually still tho

WOW THESE GOT LONG LMFAO anyways i lvoe ridgefic the whole ridge confession really did smth to my brain. enjoy the fruits of my disease

[doctorweebmd]

We will wait and wait in that space and part 2 of tht series keeps me up at night well i havent read both of them but i read the summaries and the end of part 2 and started crying

you write angst so well omgg

ive read some of ur fics and posts and u seem like a really cool person!!! What do you think is your saddest fic? I'm a sucker for angst. Im reading ur bkdk fics and im like this hits so hard omg

also new mha chapter, if this isnt too much i just wondering what r ur thoughts on it? I saw a recent post from u abt it so im assuming u alr read it or something. Sorry if this is alot!

hahahha oh my gosh thank you! i don't know how i gave off the impression i was cool at all because i am not

hmmm in terms of the saddest one? I'd say its we will wait and wait in that space, hands down. There's such a certain helplessness and hopelessness in loving someone so much, trying to save them over and over and over again, and knowing that the only way they live is if you're not part of their life. for Izuku, who desperately wants to save people, who got his power because he wanted to save Katsuki - urgh. The devastation. If any of them are worth a read for angst specifically, its that one.

ooooffff thank you for asking about the new mha chapter. its a really, really hard question to answer. there's a very melancholic vibe in the classroom, it seems. i feel for izuku. the amount of loss he's suffering through is immense. he failed to save the one person that he promised himself he's try to reach. he lost his quirk, his dream, broke his body to save everyone around him. he saw his heroes, his idols, his friends die and break and mutilate themselves and felt responsible for all of it. he is sixteen years old and the world as he knows it has changed. forever. how can that boy possibly be in a place where he can return to any semblance of normal?

i hope we have a chance to explore his grief. i hope there is a deku vs kacchan part 3, where katsuki beats izuku's 'i'm fine' out of him. i hope he cries and breaks down and tells him just how tired he is of pretending to be strong for everybody else. i hope they finally talk. that izuku acknowledges just how sincerely and completely katsuki admires him and cares for him. i hope that they can hold each other up, support each other. i hope that he can start to forgive himself. i hope, you know?

on that note, i desperately desperately hope that the 'mysterious' figure in the end is Tenko. listen, i've thought a lot about shigaraki's 'death' in the past week and a half. and, as always, i stand with the fact that horikoshi is an excellent writer and whichever way he decides to end this series and his characters is the right way. he has never been careless in the past ten years with these stories, and i dont have a single doubt he'll start now.

i've spent years talking about how shigaraki is by far my favorite antagonist in any anime ever, and that the LoV are, in every sense of the word, the greatest villain team of all time. horikoshi wrote them with as much love and sincerity as he did the heroes. if the choice to kill tomura is deliberate because it hits so hard, then i dont think it was the wrong choice. he stayed a villain until the very end, and we still loved him. we still sympathized with him. he will still haunt the narrative forever. he still was a hero to the villains. he still gave the disenfranchised hope. he still changed the world.

if he's dead, i need him to be grieved. by toga. by touya. by spinner. by izuku. i need him never to fade.

BUT. but. if he lives. if what disappeared was simply his 'vestige' of Decay and his physical body still exists somewhere, Quirkless. If he has a chance to live as Tenko Shimura. free from All for One. From the house that bound him. from the name Shigaraki itself..

i. i can't imagine a more powerful narrative than to give the villains a chance to live. to be cared for. to be loved. to see the world around them and know that it is with their own hands that they changed it. for people like them. for the future. if this is a story about hope, then that is what hope looks like to me.

[myafterlifeisbetterthenyours]

Can you please do reader meeting Octavia for the first time after reader and Stolas officially dating? You know, after the divorce with Stella 🌟

Octavia meeting Stolas' S/O for the first time after his divorce.

You were hunched over the bathroom sink, having a borderline panic attack.

You were only able to keep your composure thanks to the warm embrace of your loving boyfriend, his arms wrapped around your stomach.

"What if she doesn't like me?" You asked breathlessly, staring at yourself in the mirror.

Stolas rubbed his hands up and down your arm, planting a few gentle kisses on your shoulder, "You'll do fine, sweetheart. Octavia will love you, you Just need to be yourself."

You took several deep breaths, running some water you splashed some in your face.

Wiping your face, you took one last deep breath and gave a nod. "Alright... lets do this." You told him.

Puffing out your chest, you turned, holding his hand and walked out of the bathroom.

You found Octavia sitting in one of the palace's tea rooms, staring down at your phone. Your breathing hitched when she saw you, the young girl getting to her feet.

She stood before you, before lazily looking you up and down with an unimpressed expression.

Extending your hand you told her, "You must be Octavia, ive really been looking forwards to meeting you."

Octavia looked at Stolas for a second, before sighing, reaching out and shaking your hand. "Yeah. Nice to meet you to." She said clearly unhappy to be there.

You just took it in stride, 'That's alright. She doesn't need to like you straight away. Baby steps (Y/N), baby steps.'

You all sat down, Stolas pouring us some tea.

Stolas tried his best, he really did.

He tried sparking up a conversation, talking about what Octavia liked, bringing up any of your shared interests.

All that usual first meeting stuff.

But no matter what he said or tried, it was clear Octavia wasn't having any of it.

There was a few more minutes of this slow grind, the conversation dying out several times.

You just sat there for a minute before one of the staff came in.

Aparently something had come up that required his immediate attention. And so with a brief apology to you both he got up and left.

You of course you were freaking out, this is literally the last thing you needed. You couldn't handle Octavia alone.

You could barely handle angst alone. How were you expected to handle it from the most vicious creatures of the social world.

The teenage girl.

The moment Stolas was out of sight, Octavia whipped out her phone. The two of you sat in silence for few minutes, the young owl staring at her phone.

"Sooooo..." you began.

Octavia glanced up at you before going back to her phone "So..." she replied sarcastically.

You sighed, leaning on your elbow. "You don't really like me in, do you?" You asked almost playfully.

Octavia stopped what she was doinh, looking up from her phone she scowled at you, "What do you think?" She asked, sarcasm dripping from her words.

You just released a dry laugh. "Yeah, I get how you feel."

That got the first real reaction from her of the day.

The young owl shot to her feet, slamming her hands on the table and screamed "How the hell could you know how I feel?!"

You looked at her for a moment before taking a sip of your tea, "You know... you are the most important thing in your fathers life." You told her sternly.

The owlet was seemingly taken aback by that, sitting back down she wore a frown.

"You consume so much of his waking thought, and you know what?" You asked her.

The owlet just raised a brow, shrugging her shoulders. You gave her a warm smile, "I love that."

Octavia seemed shocked at that, asking "Why?" To which you chuckled, "Because, you have a father that genuinely loves and cares about you. You have family." You told her warmly. "And I'm happy to be a part of that... even just a little bit."

There was silence for a few minutes, the young lady clearly processing what you'd said.

"So... you have a thing for my dad... because he's a good dad?" She asked, clearly puzzled.

You chuckled again, leaning on your elbow, "Octavia... I've been with a few guys in my youth." You told her somberly. "And every one of them ended up being..."

You were silent for a long minute, looking to the side, "Bad... They were bad people a-and they did bad things... to me" You finished, rubbing your arm.

There was another long pause, neither of you saying anything, but after a moment a gentle smile crossed your lips.

"But your father..." You began, warmth in your voice. "Your father is a good man. He's good to me and he's good to you."

There was another long pause, before you reached out and gently cupped her hand, "I understand you don't really like me Octavia. And I want you to know, I don't blame you" You told her.

"My father disappeared when I was probably a bit younger then you. My mother dated a few guys, and some tried to be the 'father figure' role, but it never worked out."

There was a long pause, the young owl telling you "I'm... I'm sorry." She told you, clearly upset.

You squeezed her hand, "Its alright." You told her, "I survived, and I know youll survive as well, because you've got such strength in you octavia. You've already put up with so much, and I'm sorry to say, there will probably be a bit more to put up with." You told her somberly, "But you'll survive, you've got too much of your dad in you to give up." You told her, trying to raise the mood.

Octavia looked surprised and a little emotional, wiping her eyes.

You sighed, running a finger over her hand, "I'm not trying to replace anyone Octavia. I understand you can't replace what you had... but I love your father and I And I want to be a part of both your lives." You gave her your best warm smile, "Do you think you can give me a chance?"

You tried to look calm while internally you were freaking out, praying to whoever was listening that Octavia would believe you were being genuine.

Octavia was expressionless for several moments, eyes looking down at your hands before she looked up at you.

A small smile crossed her mouth as she brought her other hand up to grab your own.

"I last thing need right now is another parent... I can barely handle the two I already have." You both had a little chuckle at that, "Buttt... I could use a friend. You know? Someone I could come to, that understands what I'm going through." She finished a little meekly, looking up at you.

Your heart swelled with joy, giving her a big smile you nodded your head. "Yeah... I'd like that." You told her, wiping the dew from your eyes.

You both smiled for a moment, a warmth filling the room.

A sound at the door got both your attention, turning to the sound, you found a very happy Stolas, face absolutely dominated by a wide smile as he hugged himself.

"Ooooh, I'm so happy to see you getting along." He practically squealed.

And like that Octavia pulled her hands back, pulling her beanie over her face, "Ugh, Dad!" She growled.

Stolas released a little dad chuckle, coming over and sitting besides you, planting a kiss on your cheek. "Everything alright when I was gone?" He asked sweetly, curling his hand around your own.

You smiled, giving him a nod before telling him "It went..." You looked over at the Octavia.

The young owl peaking at you from beneath her beanie, "It went perfectly." You told him, planting a kiss on his cheek.

After that, things really picked up, now that Octavia was actually interacting with you.

The two of you actually had a lot in common, most surprisingly being your taste in music. The two of you spending easily half an hour talking about your favourite band.

Stolas just sat there, silently watching the two of you having your lively back and forth, the Owl could barely contain the immense amount of joy he felt at seeing his two most favourite people in all Hell getting along.

And it would be as Octavia was finding something on her phone that you noticed his gaze, looking at him, you asked "What's up?"

The owl said nothing, shaking his head he leaned down and kissing your cheek. Holding you close as you and Octavia went back to your conversation.

[jemmo]

Did you read Nanon and Ohm’s letters they wrote. IM CRYINGGG. Their friendship is so beautiful and the way they both talk about it and especially Ohm had me crying so much

yep... yep... i read them... i cried a lot. a lot a lot.

honestly, as a fan, there's really nothing better than knowing that the people that made the thing you love love it just as much as you. im gonna get emo for a sec but i feel like the biggest thing i hate hearing around shows like this and people that are fans of them is why do you care so much??? its only a show. theyre not real. get over it. fandom spaces and the shows they're there for are so rarely taken seriously, and the affect they have on people is honestly so so underappreciated. and it can make you feel silly and stupid for caring so much and that sucks, bc you just wanna love the thing and be so deep and invested in it and ride that emotional rollercoaster for all its worth and just feel every second. and you should. thats good. youre doing it right.

so knowing that not just ohm and nanon, but all the other cast and crew, are right there with us. they put just as much love into this thing as we got out of it. and you can feel it in the show. feel the love and care and passion and attention. you can just feel that its something special. its not just some show to them. they out their hearts and souls into it. and thats how great media is made, with love.

and as for ohm and nanon, honestly, i just cant thank them enough. i think they have been so brave throughout this whole thing, not just in their portrays and how open and trusting they were with the roles, but to be so open and bold about their friendship in real life. not shy away from it or overexaggerate it. thats brave. i think back to ohm getting teary during that podcast and it gets me right in the core, bc to see them have such a strong bond, so strong that they put it out there for the world to see, knowing itll get judged and read into and misinterpreted, and they dont care. theyre gonna be honest with us bc they're honest with each other. theyve been through a lot and they know where they stand. i can see in what they say how transformative this show has been for them, that its had a profound affect on their lives and on them as people. and thats special and deserves to be shared and celebrated. when i first got into BL one of my nitpicks was there was never enough discussion like the discussions ohm and nanon have been able to have. so many interviews and such are surface level with fanservice for show and its just... i wanna hear about the actors, the show, their process, how they went about performing, their opinions on what happens. bc its so interesting, and they should be able to talk about that. and i get that not all leads are close or care incredibly about the show, but that just makes this all the more precious. two people that care immensely about each other and what they're doing. two people that can be easily and naturally affectionate and express their care outwardly without awkwardness or fear or reservation. two people with a commitment to their work and craft that have never once dismissed this show, this BL, as frivolous or dumb or a splash in the pan. they respected this show. they gave it everything just as they would with any other drama. and i am beyond grateful for that. im beyond grateful for them.

honestly i could go on forever about them. they are just one of the millions of things that have made this experience something else, something that i think can never be recaptured or repeated. im so grateful that they let us peek into their real life friendship bc its such an inspiring thing. just seeing people be like that makes me want to be a good person and care about the people around me and not feel dumb for having those feelings. its truly one of the most beautiful and honest and healthy relationships ive ever seen. and they're just gonna have a special place in my heart forever.

[wing-ed-thing]

Mob Wife (Kakuzu x Reader, ft. Hidan) Part IV

Synopsis: The Akatsuki are in emergency mode. Kakuzu leads Hidan to the only place he knows for sure is safe to regroup.

Word Count: 

Warnings/Tags: Violence, Blackmail, Language, Fem!Reader, HouseWife!Reader, Moll!Reader, Attempt at Humor, Ceremonial Drinking of Sake, Traditional Wedding

Part I Part II Part III Part IV Finale

Notes: It’s back. Writing Hidan has got me feeling a certain way rn

It rained on your wedding day: weather fitting for, and not minded by, a criminal and a deserter. As you approached the temple, he tried to tell you many times that you were going to be turned away, but as you spoke to the shrine masters, you were greeted warmly and welcomed. You were young with a warm face that offset Kakuzu’s intimidating exterior. Everyone always loved you right away, a way about you that Kakuzu could never begin to consider replicating. With your open heart, you brought a foreign concept into his world: acceptance. The few priests and priestesses at the temple on the border of the Land of Stone looked upon you kindly, a kindness that you and Kakuzu continued to repay years later. The small village of a few hundred that housed that shrine would never see a shinobi attack. Now, only you continue to repay years later.

You could tell that Kakuzu didn’t like being in the temple in the slightest. He had never been one for religion or structure or ceremonies, so you tried not to laugh the first time you saw him in his montsuki haori hakama. You wondered how much grumbling went into getting Kakuzu in such formal attire with a goofy, lopsided grin. Even as he gazed upon your amused, upturned lips, his infamous temper laid unusually dormant. Kakuzu never thought that he would see his own wedding day. Being the kind of man he was, he never thought that he’d have one. He didn’t think that he deserved it, but for once as you stood in front of him in your shiromuku, all of his jaded thoughts seemed to fade. Of course with you, all doors opened.

Kakuzu knelt next to you at the shrine, ever stoic. He put his hair up before the ceremony and secured it neatly behind his head. You remembered it when it was short. As the priest announced your marriage to the gods, you couldn’t help but glance at Kakuzu out of the corner of your eye. He held himself together better than you imagined he would.

“Well, yes. I am an adult,” he would tell you later.

But at that moment, he received the first sakazuki. The priest's vessel tipped over the small cup two times before pouring. Kakuzu brought the dish up to his lips and took three sips: pointless seeing that neither of you had parents, but traditional nonetheless. You were taught to always honor your ancestors, but you doubted that Kakuzu felt the same. You received your cup and the same sake, taking the same three sips and the ceremony went on. The second sakazuki represented your vow to care for each other. You received a slightly larger cup and once again, you each touched the sake to your lips three times. The third represented fortune and fertility.

The Heavens, the Earth, and the People.

You offered Kakuzu a light smile as you moved to the next part of the ceremony, a gesture to assure him that it was almost over. He would have rolled his eyes in any other setting, but Kakuzu didn’t even have to speak for you to know exactly what he meant. You knew that more than anything, he was happy to be with you. Out of all the things that he had done as a shinobi, he could handle a stuffy ceremony.

“I thought you liked stuffy things,” you teased him later, parts of your robes slung over forearms and shoulders for better mobility as you walked through the gardens. Your hand rested in his as you balanced yourself on some raised, rock ledges. His expression could have easily been mistaken for exasperation as he scoffed, but you knew better. He looked happy. “You’re a shinobi. Now that’s stuffy!”

The priest had you stand and you received a flowering branch to offer to the gods. As you held the sprig in your hand, you glanced at Kakuzu. His eyes met your own and you quietly prayed over your offerings before presenting them together, stem first. You bowed together, the rituals vaguely familiar to you as you performed them.

With the blessings of the gods, you had received your rings. Your thumb ran over the skin of Kakuzu’s hand. They had a familiar gruffness to them and held smooth bumps from old scars. His fingernails were short. You slid the band onto his ring finger. The black suited him. He squeezed the fingers of your other hand. The space behind your eyes stung as you held back tears watching as he placed the ring on your hand.

Neither of you had family, so you thanked the shrine priests and priestesses and enjoyed their hospitality. You took a single picture. It was the same frame that you held in your hands now.

Kakuzu walked out a few hours ago, taking Hidan with him. Your kitchen was, for the most part, wrecked. Your doing. Your tears had since dried up and your trembling was beginning to fade. With a shaky breath, you brought yourself to your feet. You placed the picture face-down on the counter and reached for the broom in the corner. Your heart hurt, but the world continued on. And if the world continued on, so should you.

***

You didn’t want to eat, you didn’t feel hungry, but you stood over the sink anyway biting into whatever you could pull from your fridge. You cleaned up the kitchen to the best of your ability. Trash piled up in neat bins outside: splintered wood, broken plates, and any other particles of dust that you managed to sweep up. You could handle it later. At least the rest of the kitchen was spotless. You glanced down at the thick wedding band that sat in your hand. Twirling it between your fingers, you bit into your bell pepper like an apple. That was the kind of night you were having.

A harsh pounding came from the front door and for a split second you wondered if your husband came back. Ex-husband. You didn’t think so. You kept your eyes on the kitchen window but the pounding continued adamantly. A slight shiver went down the back of your neck. The next farm wasn’t for miles. That was definitely not Kakuzu.

You put down your pepper and rolled out your utensil drawer. Your fingers danced across the kunai strapped to the bottom as you silently hoped that your training hadn’t worn off too horribly. The banging ceased as the doorknob began to rattle. The door swung open and you launched your kunai with immense velocity and precision. It was snatched out of the air.

“Fuck! That hurts like a bitch!”

Hidan stood in the entryway with his hand still held up and wrapped around your weapon. Blood dripped onto your floors as the kunai clattered to the ground. He shook out his palm, now sporting a deep gash. All you could do was stand and blink, wondering why he was there and if Kakuzu was with him. Hidan threw his cloak onto the rack. It slid, hardly staying on as he marched over to you. The door didn’t fit into its frame the same as it did before and there was no sign of Kakuzu.

“Can you patch me up, lady?” He looked around your kitchen for somewhere to sit, but found none. He dripped more onto your floors. You quickly guided his wrist over your sink and looked up at him. Beads of water fell down his face. You didn’t even hear the rain outside.

“What happened?” you asked sternly, your voice cracking a bit with worry. Hidan groaned.

“You fucked up my hand, can you at least fix me? I’m traumatized over here.” You sighed, yanking him forward before turning the running water on over his hand. You held it there for a second as if telling him to keep it there before running off to get your medical kit.

“Hidan, you have to tell me if there is an emergency,” you said as you heaved the box onto the counter from your spare room. You cleaned his palm with soap and disinfectant before applying pressure. While you didn’t have to worry about blood loss with Hidan, you also didn’t want him passing out on your kitchen floor either. That would make one more thing to clean up. “Hidan—” You pulled the gauze extra tight. He didn’t seem to be listening to you. —“Is there an emergency?”

“No, lady, it was just cold as fuck and Kakuzu’s got a stick up his ass that’s worse than usual. But you already know what that’s like.” The atmosphere stood still at the mention of Kakuzu’s name.

You knew that you shouldn’t worry about him. As far as you were concerned, he had just divorced you a few hours ago, and even if he hadn’t, you were certain that he could take care of himself. You apparently didn’t do a great job at masking your worry.

He usually didn’t care about the effect of his words, but as you frowned to yourself, Hidan couldn’t help but consider how sad you looked. He pursed his lips, never one for comforting others. For a split second, he wondered whether or not he should have brought up his partner at all. Two fingers gently bumped the bottom of your chin and you looked up at Hidan.

“Don’t look so down. It doesn’t look good on you.” He hesitated. “He’ll come back.”

You dropped his wrapped hand, not noticing that you’ve been drawing loops around his knuckles with your finger.

“I don’t know. He’s usually pretty certain about things and I can’t dwell on that.” You shook your head, turning the water back on to wash your own hands. “You have to go. I know that you have things to do and my— and Kakuzu won’t like that you’re here.” He pouted as you moved around him. You had blood to clean up.

“But it’s raining…” he pouted, expression falling in your peripheral. “And he’s miserable right now which means I’m miserable. C’mon let me stay, I’m miserable.”

“Hidan.” You turned to him and leaned on the doorway from your kitchen to your small living area. “Your partner doesn’t live here anymore.” You flicked on the entryway light, your bucket in hand. Hidan followed behind you, now taking your spot in the doorframe.

“But that doesn’t mean that I have to leave. You know he’s being stupid, but that doesn’t mean that I need to suffer out in the rain because Kakuzu’s a crotchety, old bastard.” You sighed, resting on the handle of your mop. You shook your head.

“I’m sure by the time you get to town the two of you can find somewhere to stay.”

A silence overtook the house again, full of raging, but unspoken thoughts. You squeezed out the yarns and tended to the floors. It, at the very least, gave you something to do. Hidan’s blood already dried part way and you scrubbed harder, but not before it was snatched out of your grip. Hidan shoved you over to take your place. The backs of your knees hit the armrest of the modest couch that you almost toppled down onto. He took to scrubbing.

“So what happened?” he asked.

“Sorry?” Hidan peered at you with his bright violet irises.

“I’m trying to be nice and ask you about your problems, so you better start chatting before I lose interest.” The mop splashed back into the bucket. “Who else do you get to talk to?” You pursed your lips. You knew that he was biding his time to wait out the rain, but his words weren’t wrong. The hurt still felt fresh and perhaps you were feeling a bit desperate to get it out of your system.

“I’m not sure what happened. I asked, but, well, you know how my… how Kakuzu is.” And you found yourself retelling the entirety of what happened: the argument, the ring, Kakuzu’s misplaced comments about children. You left out the part about the wrecked kitchen. “And then he said something about ‘now letting this happen’ which had to be the last straw for me.”

“Did you want brats?” Hidan had since stopped his cleaning. Surprisingly, he listened intently to your rambling as he propped himself against the wall. You swung your feet back and forth over the side of the couch.

“I never really thought about it before and Kakuzu and I never talked about it, so I don’t know why he brought it up.”

“Because he’s a dumbass who thinks too much. I never know what’s going on in that fucked up head of his. If I had a home to come to like this with a cute little thing in an apron—” Hidan scoffed. —“Fuck the Akatsuki. I wouldn’t be hiding you out here because of some band of losers in capes.” That made you laugh.

“You’re in the Akatsuki,” you giggled and Hidan raised a slender eyebrow.

“So? I’m the best one out of all those guys.”

“The best out of some band of losers?” The corners of Hidan’s lips turned upwards into a brief smile as he rolled his pretty irises.

“Listen, I got my devilish charms going for me which is better than Ragdoll. He looks like a fucking pin cushion.” Your hand came over your mouth as you laughed. Hidan looked down at where you sat, pride swelling in his chest at the prospect of cheering you up. But your face quickly morphed into something sentimental.

“Aw, but he’s a cute pin cushion…” Your bottom lip curled into a pout, but at least you didn’t look quite as sad as before. Hidan leaned a bit forward.

“He’s a little over a hundred-eight centimeters tall and has a big-ass nose.” You let out an amused breath. “I’d hardly consider that ‘cute’.”

“But it’s a cute nose. It’s slender and has that cute little bump in the middle.” Your voice grew quieter. Another silence, the third of Hidan’s visit.

It all felt too confusing for you. Maybe Kakuzu was never that interested in you in the first place. You shook your head then and there, much to Hidan’s confusion. Despite Kakuzu’s attitude towards most everything, you knew that he cared deeply about you. Perhaps he had grown bored. Despite ninja work not being of interest to you, you knew that many found the profession very exciting. You ran many profitable operations in the surrounding area, but more money could be made elsewhere, you knew that much. Your lifespan was nothing compared to Kakuzu’s nearly a century of living. He had done everything in life that he had wanted to do and all you had little to show for your existence.

You kept replaying his words about the time that you had. That you had enough time to do more. But if you really thought about it, you were content living the way you had been. You were happy and for a split second you considered whether or not Kakuzu actually saw himself as worthy of you. You shook your head for the second time. No, if anything, you considered it the other way around. You’d imagine that you would come off as boring and childlike to an immortal.

“That’s a lot of thinking.” Hidan had taken to wandering around the room. You hadn’t noticed. “Fuck thinking. You deserve better than taking care of some place in the middle of nowhere and running numbers on boring-ass shit.” You smiled again to yourself, something else that you didn’t notice.

“I actually like it here,” you mumbled. Hidan yawned.

“Can I stay now?” You deliberated to yourself before grabbing the bucket and the mop away from him. He didn’t do a great job, but you found yourself relatively uncaring at the moment.

“Yes, you can stay,” you sighed. Hidan was already halfway down the hall by the time you finished your sentence.

“Good because I was going to crash here anyway.”

@brokennerdalert @unsatisfiedanddisappointed @krispypotato @meme-queen-1999​

Notes: Reader and Kakuzu had a Shinto wedding if anyone’s interested. 

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed and otherwise supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

[blxetsi]

I was curious if you’d be up for headcanon of adopting Gabi Braun, or what it’s like being her older sibling?

If not maybe just Pieck relationship headcanons

Please and thank you

im so sorry im getting to this so late 😭🤚 ty for requesting ‼️

‼️CONTENT WARNING: SPOILERS FOR SEASON 4 AND CHAPTER 139‼️

adopting gabi braun headcanons (canonverse)

characters: gf!sasha braus x gn!reader, platonic!gabi braun x gn!reader, fatherly!levi ackerman x gn!reader, platonic!falco grice x gn!reader

warnings: death, angst, hatred for kids (fuck them kids‼️), peepaw levi 😁👍

- uhhhhhh,, your relationship w gabi had a very rocky start. Lol !

- it all started when your friend eren jaeger decided to run away to infiltrate marley causing the survey corps to go get him just as a war was declared between your countries, and then two kids snuck onto the airship you were using to escape and shot your girlfriend. and she died. Lol !

- you had a lot of hatred for gabi in the beginning, and it was understandable

- you blamed her for shooting sasha, but you also blamed yourself for not being able to save her.

- you were a trained medic, you were supposed to save people, and yet you couldnt even save the woman you loved. it was like a slap in the face, like god was playing some cruel joke on you

- you remember sitting against the wall with sasha's blood staining your hands. you could barely process what happened at the time, and then levi came

- he sat next to you, taking a handkerchief out of nowhere seemingly, and just wordlessly wiped your hands down.

- your relationship with the older man was never defined, even today, but you both cared for each other

- the next time you saw gabi, was in that restaurant, niccolo had attacked gabi and falco, injuring them both, and said she killed sasha

- your blood went cold, you felt so many things, the grief you had pushed down in favour of your job, anger, fear, among other things

- niccolo had said there needed to be justice, he said that gabi should die for what she did, he tried to get sasha's father to kill her, and all you did was stand there.

- your body went on autopilot, barely listening to mr. braus' speech, you watched as kaya pointed a knife at gabi, and you listened to her wails of agony as you blindly led mikasa, armin, and gabi to a different room

- you were scared of yourself, for what you were thinking. did you really want a kid to die ? she did kill your girlfriend, the woman you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, the woman that shared her food with you, the woman that held you when you got scared at night, the woman that promised you that after the war you two would live on a farm together, and have a family of your own.

- but she was still a child. she didnt know any better. you were conflicted in your feelings, especially after hearing what niccolo had said, but it all just emphasized what was already known to you. she was a child

- your blood was pounding in your ears, and you could faintly hear gabi asking your comrades if they wanted to kill her. when armin reassured her they didnt, she looked to you and asked "what about them ?"

- you didnt answer her, and continued to lead them down where eren would be meeting you all. you were supposed to drop them off, but eren made you stay, and then a fight broke out

- you dont remember when you did it, but you held gabi in your arms, shielding her from the fight. you think you needed to be held more than she did

- things got more complicated after that, and slowly the hatred you had for sasha's killer went away, until all you had left was a hole in your chest from guilt and sadness.

- at fort salta, you thought you were going to die there, next to your friends. you thought you'd become a mindless titan, like connie's family

- but you didnt, well you did, but only for a short time, and when you turned back, you reunited with your friends

- looking around for gabi, you saw her tackle falco into a hug, which made you smile

- "y/n !" jean called, you remember looking behind you in confusion, he sounded distressed, but you understood why when you saw sasha saluting the three of you

- you felt your legs move on your own, and you ran closer to her, before stopping about a meter away. she was dead, you knew she was dead, but she was there, wearing that goofy smile on her face and looking at you as if you'd hung the stars in the sky

- she looked at you. "you did good." hearing her voice felt like a dream. your mouth felt dry, and your jaw opened and closed like a fish before you felt tears sting your eyes. "i love you."

- she nodded, before looking at the sky. "i know." she replied. sasha looked back at you before giving you a soft smile. "you know what to do now." before she disappeared in the debris

- you knew what to do, so you did it

- you found levi sitting against a rock, and when you leaned down next to him he muttered something. "i saw erwin again. and hange. all of them." you nodded. "i saw sasha." he looked at you, and gave you the closest thing to a smile. "i guess we're both at peace now."

*****

- three years later, you've become a school teacher in paradis, teaching young children how to read, to write, and basic math. you teach them about art and music, and nature. its nice being surrounded by children all day, kids are lovely.

- you live with gabi, falco and levi, in a small house inside wall sina. levi's legs have gotten weaker with time, causing him to use a wheelchair and crutches. he's given up on his dream of a tea shop, but is content with the life he has now.

- gabi and falco have gotten more rowdy with age, but they've both matured quite a bit. they make you proud

- you send letters to sasha's family. kaya is growing up, and has taken over archery just like her sister. niccolo is living with them now.

- you'll never be able to let go of sasha, or what happened to her, but the pain in your chest has dulled immensely. you think about her sometimes, when youre in bed alone, wanting to feel the warmth of her body in your arms, you know you should move on, you get teased about not having a new girlfriend, even levi has made comments about there being "plenty of fish in the sea"

it was a late night, on a friday. you were grading spelling tests at the dining room table, one lone candle being your source of light. your pen moves swiftly across the different pieces of paper, adding check marks or x marks when needed, adding a note at the bottom of each test, before adding a smiley face on all of your students' hard work. it was tedious, but it needed to be done, and you had to remember to bring them in on monday, you couldn't forget like last time.

you heard footsteps coming down the stairs. they were soft, and slow, and at first you thought it was levi but realized it couldn't be since you couldn't hear the soft tapping of his crutches on the stairs. they came down to the bottom and stood there, it was gabi, dressed in a light pink nightgown that came down to her knees, and her disheveled hair in the braid you did for her before bed.

you pushed your reading glasses to the top of your head. "what are you doing up ? it's late."

she shrugged, and walked over to sit across from you at the table. gabi grabbed the stack of papers that you already graded and shuffled through them, giggling when she found a misspelling.

you rolled her eyes. "don't laugh, they're six."

she shook her head. "i was spelling ten times better than this when i was their age."

"uh huh."

"are you calling my bluff ?"

you chuckled. "maybe. you should be in bed though."

"why ? it's not like we have school tomorrow."

you shrugged. "i was thinking we could go on a picnic outside the walls. it gets stuffy in here."

she nodded. "that would be fun."

the silence came back for a while, until you finished grading and set your papers aside.

"you know, i hear you sometimes." she whispered.

you looked at the brunette in confusion. "how do you mean ?"

"when your in bed, sometimes you cry."

you scoffed, and leaned back in your chair. "yeah well, i try to muffle it."

"i don't think ive ever apologized to you," she started. her eyes welled up with tears and her hands shook on the table. her cheeks and nose became pink as she held herself back from crying. "i know i feel bad, and i regret killing her but, i've never actually apologized to you for-"

"don't." you said. you kept your eyes on your lap, you felt your throat growing tight. "please gabi, don't say anything."

"i need to apologize-"

"you don't. you killed her. she's dead, the war is over. it's done. just let it go." you said, your voice wavering.

"have you let it go ?"

your head shot up to her. "i lost the woman i was going to spend the rest of my life with. she promised me a safe home, a farm, and a family. and she promised we'd grow old together. and that didn't happen. i grew up with her, i've known her since i was twelve, we started dating when i was sixteen. of course i haven't let it go, gabi."

gabi looked shocked by your outburst, but nodded. she understood how you felt, and she felt so guilty. "you don't forgive me do you ? i get it, i really do. i'm sorry."

you shook your head. "gabi no, i do. i do forgive you. i just, i can't forget it." you whimpered, tears started streaming down your face and you choked back a sob. "i loved her with all of my heart, i still do, but i don't hate you-"

gabi rolled her eyes, tears coming out uncontrollably now. "you should. i killed her, i ruined your chance of a happy life ! she was your family and i-"

"gabi no !" you exclaimed, cutting her off. at this point you both looked like a mess, and you were worried you woke up the boys. you grabbed her shaking hands in your own and held them to you. "you are my family. you are. so is falco, and so is levi. i forgive you, and i love you with all of my heart." you said, a sad smile on your face. her eyes widened at your words, before she started sobbing.

you got up from the table to come to her side, and held her in your arms as she cried. her arms wrapped around your shoulders while she dug her head into your neck, tickling you with her hair.

you rubbed her back and cradled her head while shushing her. she sobbed out a muffled "i love you so much y/n." that you chuckled at.

"i love you too so much." you whispered back.

it took a long time for gabi to calm down, but when she did you still held her, rocking her and yourself back and forth slightly. you two moved from the chairs down to the floor, funny enough.

you kissed the top of her head before talking, the only noise in the room being your whispers, her sniffles and the living room clock. "you know reiner's coming home soon. are you excited ?" she nodded against your skin and sniffled again, clearing her throat too.

"i hope he brings me a gift or something." she whispered back, her voice hoarse. it made you laugh, and you had to cover your mouth to keep quiet.

"they're going to shiganshina district for a couple of days, to visit mikasa and eren, and then mikasa will come with them to the capital."

"do you miss her ?" she asked.

"so much. i miss all of them, but mikasa is a close friend of mine, she holds a special place in my heart."

"do you think you and levi will go to the meetings between the marley ambassadors and the jaegerists ?" she asked.

"maybe, if they feel as though they really need us."

you sighed through your nose, which was a bit stuffy from crying. "after we turned back into humans, i saw sasha again."

gabi lifted her head up from where it was resting on your shoulder. "what ?"

"yeah, i saw her ghost i think." you looked down on her with a smile on your face. "she told me i knew what i needed to do, and then i went and got levi and you and falco." you paused for a moment, thinking about how you would word what you were thinking. "i did what i needed to do, i got my family together." gabi's eyes widened. "sasha promised me a family, and although this wasn't the family i had envisioned, it's still a family nonetheless. i believe her last gift to me was you, falco, and levi. and i am so grateful to have you all in my life."

gabi smiled before hugging you. she opened her mouth to say something-

"oi !" a deep voice came from the top of the stairs. "you two woke me up with all of your crying. go to bed." before your heard the creaking of the floorboards and the closing of a door.

you chuckled before standing up, pulling gabi with you. you walked her to her room, and even tucked her in, you both exchanged 'i love yous' and 'goodnights' before you retreated from her bedroom, closing the door behind you.

across the hall, levi stood leaned on his doorway with his arms crossed together. "that family speech, that was cute." he commented. you rolled your eyes at the older man. "were you listening in on a private conversation ?" you teased.

the ex-captain scoffed and looked away. "go to bed y/n. we have a picnic to go on tomorrow." before closing his door.

you chuckled to yourself, remembering how you brought up the idea to him that morning, and he only replied with a curt "we'll see" before sipping on his morning tea.

you went back to your own room, and got into your bed. you turned on your side, and looked at the space you always left open for sasha, and brushed your hand against the pillow.

"goodnight love."

uhhhhh doesnt feel like my best work but whatevs 😁👍 enjoy my comeback to tumblr 🤩🙏

requests open mfs ‼️

[ahxiang]

hi tea!! ive been 👀 at reset lately do u feel like telling me a bit about it? like i know it's about a time loop but it seems a bit long to be going over and over for 15 eps 😅

cata, beloved!! that is exactly what i thought when i first started it! i was like "how are they gonna stretch a time loop over an entire series??" and then a few eps in i 180'd and thought "how have ppl been able to fit time loops into only one ep/movie??" it seems like it'd be annoyingly repetitive, but surprisingly it isn’t! the individual loops tend to last a while and the plot is pretty different in each one. because of the decisions the main characters make and their goal of ending the loop by doing things differently, it doesn’t seem like watching the same thing over again, even when there are details or motions you know in advance. it keeps you on your toes each loop and helps with that redundancy.

the way it is edited also helps. for loops that are a lot shorter and can be redundant, the show presents them to us in intriguing manners that personally kept up my (generally very bad) attention. and this goes for more than just the repetition! i love the cinematography and editing of reset, it heightens the mystery elements and knows just how long to focus on one scene/storyline to keep the audience engaged but not bored. through a technical lens, i honestly think the series is a work of art and has been made by people who are v good at their jobs.

now, the shining factor of the drama is truly the stories it tells and the heart it has. the time loop plot is fun and exciting and mysterious and all that, but, like the lovely sofia @ahxu-laowen said, “apart from the very intriguing plot, this story is about kindness and empathy”. the language arts nerd in me is popping out here but every character is a round character and almost all of them are dynamic. we get to see so much more than just the protags and their adventures with the time loop. we get to peer into the lives of the people around them, those who generally would be tertiary characters instead become deuteragonists that the series makes us care about and empathize with. and the magic of this is especially present in the main character shi qing, who is kind to all of them and listens to (or investigates into) their stories. without giving anything away, even the antagonist is round and dynamic, and i think it serves to give us a fantastically fleshed out story. it's so much more than just a time loop.

and of course, while not the main focus and definitely more subtle, the romance is just *chef’s kiss*. i know you watched happiness, so i'd say its romance is very similar to that of reset. i've said this so many times to so many people, but i am just the biggest sucker for that whole "we've been through so much together/only trust each other" dynamic. i mean, (to paraphrase @bittergloss) the intimacy of being trapped somewhere that only they know the truth about even though they exist with everyone else?? having to fight and struggle to survive and get out while only having each other to lean on??? staying by each other's side bc goddamn it they've gotten this far together and going on any other way is just wrong???? that shit does things to me 😭😭😭 so yeah, if you liked that about happiness i think you'll enjoy it in reset as well.

and just some closing remarks on the comparison of reset to happiness bc they're very similar in my mind (though that may just be bc i hyperfixated on them back to back absdjsk). they've both got the same balance of plot/action to personal relationships and the plots are v similar from a danger/urgency standpoint. idk, i just think they have v similar vibes and i enjoyed both immensely!

aaaanywayyyyy, sorry for the essay, i love reset sm and i have a lot to say, lmao. i hope that was helpful and that you decide to watch!! if it helps, my mom doesn't really watch tv and drops things sooo fast, but she loves reset! like, she's obsessed now, absjdkfl. and you picked the perfect time to start it bc it's fully subbed as of literally right now! anyway, yeah, hope you enjoy and you are so welcome to come scream about it with me if you decide to watch!

[efkgirldetective]

~part IV~ of this little prompt series { part I & part II & part III }

much love&thanks to @shaniso90 for this adjusted prompt !!! your noun/color/place worked so so well with my imposed emotion ✨

(ps highly recommend listening to tell me you love me by sufjan stevens—irrefutably/canonically jily—whilst reading)

sweater + lavender+ library + apprehension

Lily pauses, lazy with sleep, in the cusp of the hall—glimpsing round the corner James and Sirius stood in the kitchen, bent together, talking in quiet tones. She leans her head to the wall, watches James smile and laugh. He looks well-rested. He’s wearing the sweater she gave him for Christmas, lavender and woolen. One elbow already rethreaded with magic.

She presses a hand to her ribs. Afraid if she doesn’t hold her heart inside, it will spill out. Sirius leans back against the counter and flicks his wand at a simmering pan, at the toaster; she can smell eggs and nearly-burnt bread; the lingering scent of James, head heavy on his morning pillow. His fluttering lashes as he woke, slowly, culled his fingers to her neck, kissed her through halfsleep; whispered I’m here, sweetheart. I’m here.

Lily lets the fingers shift down; rest on her belly. Tender and soft. She steps into the kitchen.

“Morning, sleepy,” James murmurs when she tucks herself into his side, feeling the sweater between her fingers, feeling his warmth and his being here, being alive. Gripping at the loops of his jeans. Unwilling to let go.

“Toast, Evans?” Sirius asks, slipping past them. “Eggs?”

They share slow breakfast. Peter joins not long after and steeps tea just the way they all like. They laugh when Remus finally emerges, disgruntled and bedheaded, shoving at Sirius lightheartedly as he’s pulled in for a kiss; hands touching necks. Lily keeps herself connected to James; hand on his leg as it bounces under the table; mouth pressed into his shoulder when he refills her juice; fingers moving up through his hair, still damp from a shower. As if he’ll stay, just here, if she can keep him steady. As if touch could save him—any of them.

“Come with me to the library?” Lily wonders as the table breaks up— Remus fully awake and talking aloud through his list of Saturday chores, Sirius groaning that they ought to just go back to bed and loiter, Peter insisting on clearing the dishes, jostling a kind and gentle hand at James’ shoulder—“I’ve got books to return.”

They pile on their corduroy coats and cast warming charms and walk down the street through late November leaves, sunlight yellow and cold. Lily concentrates on the feeling of their hands, entwined. Hefts her tote of books higher on her shoulder. Feels his thumb rubbing her thumb.

“Okay?” he asks and in response, she brings the thumb up to her lips.

The Muggle library is scarce with patrons. Lily returns her books and chats for a moment with sweet, silver-haired Fran. “You’re quite glowing, love,” the librarian says as Lily shuffles a stack of new books into the tote. “Has that tall handsome mister gone and given you a ring?”

Lily smiles—and it bursts in jest as much in sadness. “Not yet, Fran, no ring.”

“He’s a right plonker should he not be ring shopping, at least. Tell him I said that, would you now?”

Lily finds James in the back of the library, flipping through a book on car mechanics, muttering on about how bloody impossible it all is, sans spellwork. The glass-ceilinged atrium above scatters gold light over the floor, over the stacks; catches in his dark hair. Lily feels the heart-spill, tenfold. Fits herself to his back and wraps her arms around his body; buries her face in his coat.

“Lils?” he asks, spreading his hands over hers.

“I love you,” she tells his coat.

He twists around fully and cradles her jaw and the library feels immense—but, still, too small. She chokes on the weight of her nerves, on the weight of the future. “You’re pale,” he murmurs, and she shuts her eyes. “Really, is everything okay?”

“Let’s walk,” she diverts, eager for someplace else to breathe.

They walk to a nearby park. The sun has dimmed behind clouds. Lily feels her footsteps very intentionally. Tucked into the crook of his body, she knows this is before. The after, unknowable. They will never be the same.

They meander to a bench with a nice view of a small pond, catered in late autumn by dreary clouded algae, birds splashing their wings in the water.

James doesn’t push—knowing, perhaps, that the words are glomming in her throat, that her fear and panic and wrong time wrong time wrong time are fraught enough to bury any thrill; affection; growth.

She asks, to stall, “your leg?”

He gives her a small smile. “Aches, just a little.”

“Good,” she nods, breathing out, running her hand down his arm; feeling his eyes on her. She looks out over the water. “Good.”

A family teeters down the path behind them. The babbling child throws the skin of an orange into the grass. Lily concentrates, very hard, on the way an orange smells when its skin is peeled off; the pleasant, stinging sweet. She remembers like her own breath the day she and James shared an orange under summer sun, eighteen years old, besotted; juice dripping between fingers. I love you shimmering between them for the very first time. “Can you feel it?” he wondered, hair moved through with wind. She held his eyes and cupped his hand in hers; gave over the last slice of fruit. “I’m full of it.” She tasted the orange on his lips. Amended, “overflowing.”

“I don’t know," she whispers, now, on the cold bench, "how you’ll react.”

James squeezes her hand. “It’s okay,” he says gently. “Anything, Lils. I’m here.”

“It’s...” she smooths a hand down her wool skirt, the thick stockings beneath. Looking for something to ground. “These last weeks have been—tumultuous,” she begins, “with the Order, and the moon, and the—with you, your—”

Out in the pond, a pair of ducks submerge their heads underwater. Lily reels in the tight knot of breath in her throat; tries to swallow past.

“Love,” James says, eyebrows pressed together, shifting himself sideways, arm reaching out under her back, round her waist. “What’s happened?”

Her lips quiver. How stupid it is—how reckless. “I missed my period, fully, last month,” she whispers, toying compulsively with the hem of her skirt. “And...I’m late on my charm, I missed the appointment. In the middle of—” she cuts her head away from him; can’t bear to see his face, falling. “I didn’t go. I forgot.”

There are birds in distant trees, calling out; anxious. The memory of the child, the orange peel, and the summer sun are blurring, too much the same thing. A love without home.

A sprawl of fingers on her cheek; she lets her face turn. His eyes gone soft. “You’re—” he clears his throat and runs a thumb over her chin. “Are you—?”

No chance of swallowing this lump, now. She lets it lump. Lets herself nod, slowly.

James goes still, save the stroke of his thumb. She feels frantic to move—to gasp—to scream. But she stays in his stillness and watches for signs of life. For signs of annoyance, of anger, of this is not our time.

None of it comes.

“I know,” she says, to fill the quiet, without much of a voice, “we’re too young, and there’s—so much wrong with it, and no time for—I know I’ve fucked up, I know there’s no place for such—such irresponsible—”

“Lily,” James chokes, flattening any further defense. “Lily,” he repeats, and his eyes are wet and his hand on her chin is shaking, shaking entirely.

“Are you...upset?”

“Upset? How could I—” James searches her eyes, frantically. “Are you upset?”

She bites her lips. Finds a swell of heat, in the space of their bodies—shakes her head, suddenly certain. “No. Scared, yes, but....no,” she breathes in. “I’m not upset.”

His breath seems to rush out all at once. He hiccups on a laugh, and pulls her in desperately, arms wrapping around; she lets herself burrow. Safe and warm. His lips press into her neck without aim. His smile presses, too. “Lily,” he whispers, and even her name is safe, tucked under his tongue. “When did you—” he pulls back, wet-cheeked. She scatters it away with her thumbs. “How long have you known?”

“Only yesterday. St. Mungos sent an owl and...” she feels herself blushing. “When Mags was in, wrapping up your spells...I went to the corner shop for a Muggle test and took it in their loo.”

James blows air out through his lips. “The Muggle tests...they’re accurate?...I mean,” he restarts, deliberately, brow knit in careful concentration. “You’re—you’re absolutely sure?”

“A Healer will be able to confirm, but...” Lily extracts one of his hands and folds it over her stomach; hears his quick inhaling breath. She covers the hand with her own. “I feel...full.”

“Oh my god, Evans,” he laughs, looking up at her; voice faltering, split in two; eyes overfull with wonder. “We’re having a baby?”

To be growing something that belongs to them both; to watch him transform with the knowledge, blinking, and teary, and happy. Lily’s heart pushes hard at her ribs. The birds are calling out in the trees. In among the this is not our time: something flowering, something organic—we will make this our time.

“Yes, Potter,” she smiles, chasing his sparkling laugh; her body a home to such love. “We’re having a baby.”

[gracifleur]

okay i'm kidding, more seriously: what drew you to shaymin in the first place? do you have any favorite and least favorite theories and concepts regarding it?

i hope ur ready 2b emotional on this good monday bc this, is the saga of me & shaymin.

so ive been a fan pkmn since the good year of 1998, u could not for the life of u me n dupree get my gameboy from my tiny child fingers n make me put down red or blue. my fav pkmn was pikachu, instantly. i still have my fav pikachu shirt from childhood ok listen. so thru the years watching the anime, seeing the movies in theater, playing the games time passes n we get to rse & admittedly i was burnt OUT. BURT THE FUCK OUT. but also, & pls no hate, i wasnt the biggest fan of the 3rd gen. i loved the sprites, the pkmn, the location, but the story itself just wasnt my thing & i rlly just felt the pang of man idk if im into this as i used to be which sucks when u lose a hyperfixation but also something that u rlly love n enjoyed n brought u immense joy. so i decided to be a wee bit edgy n be all bleh pkmn for babies as i totally very much still replayed rby & gsc etc etc. im a lil hypocrite if nothing. so when the ds came out n news of a new gen was on the horizon, i ignored it. however one of my high school besties did not & got diamond. it was also my birthday( fun fact i do share a release date birthday with platinum in america i will let u look it up ) & pal was like 'i wanted pearl so here take diamond as ur gift n lets go get my game n play together i kno u love pkmn' he was right. i do love pkmn n wow, wow. the first moments of diamond rlly just SNAPPED something within me. it was like falling in love with this series all over again. something about the world, the characters, the story, the pkmn it all fell into place n really really made me remember why i loved this franchise in the first place.

so, naturally i start paying attention again to pkmn news & more importantly: event pkmn. which lead me to this advertisement from toys r us. also fun fact: i have the shaymin image from this ad bc i cut it out, it's in my 3ds case at all times safe.

now, i saw this lil fella & i was like oh my god ur so adorable i need you. && so me n one of my high school besties who was as fanatic abt pkmn as me rushed off 2 our local toysrus n download the mystery gift. i go n open the summery of my shaymin & that was that. idk what happened. suddely pikachu was #2 in my heart( tho nowdays i do consider both shaymin & pikachu as my all time favs, but shaymin is like slightly higher on the list ). idk what it was ! this lil fella made me appreciate grass types, a type i normally dont care for at all but turtwig had started to fix that. i always had them in my party, i got a secondary diamond copy just to hACK TO DO THE OAKS LETTER EVENT. i loved them idk why something about the fact that this lil friend shaped creature is thankful to me in spite of everything was like the franchise itself saying thank you for always loving pkmn, for giving it a second chance, for like idk being a good friend. && that rlly resonated with me.

pkmn has been a franchise that has rlly helped me thru some shit & has always just been consistently there. every game since diamond ive loved more n more n more. && i think like gen4 will always be special for me & so will shaymin bc like as grateful as i am for pkmn it sorta feels like pkmn is grateful for me too & thats just like makes ur heartgut go emotional huh cause it does me too its ok anyways shaymin rules actually

aND FOR THE SECOND PART UHH IDK ABOUT THEORIES I HATE or concepts, its kinda hard to like rlly delve into more than whats there bc shaymin seems to embody the coming of spring, the change of the seasons, to start anew, refresh & rejuvenation all of those are sick as fuck concepts but i guess if i had a criticism i would def say sky forme looks stupid kdJHASKJDhsa IDK THATS JUST ME LAND FORME BEST FORME #HATER

oh uh, pet tax: here is a photo of that said toysrus shaymin currently chilling in my copy of x

[paper-n-ashes]

sparks and embers - chapter 2

Characters: Poe Dameron x Original Female Character, Kylo Ren x Original Female Character

Story Tags: Explicit (18+), Canon Compliant/Divergent (Set after TLJ), First Person POV, Love Triangle, Slow Burn, Enemies to Lovers, Porn with Plot, Hurt/Comfort, Kylo Ren hates Poe Dameron

Summary: Alexys is a doctor living a life of exclusivity on Raxus, hoping to survive through a peaceful existence, concealing herself from those she believes would use her, or kill her. When fate intervenes and instigates a perilous journey she’d been desperately trying to avoid, Alex finds herself caught in the middle of two sides in both war and love.

Chapter 2 - Consciousness

Words: 3.4k

Chapter Tags/Warnings: mentions of blood and broken bones, medical procedures

Read on AO3

~

It was the light of morning that caused my eyes to flutter open, the hardness of the tiled floor beneath slowly recognised in an increasing ache pulsing through my body.

I was slow to move, measured actions helping to bring myself into a seated position, arms shakily holding me up at the sides. Memories of the previous evening flooded back in swift succession, along with the pain of immense fatigue that always followed the act of letting the Force do my healing for me.

Did it even work?

My hand gripped the hospital bed that his body remained slumped on and I pulled myself upwards, feet gliding along the ground under my legs until I could stand. The scene before me was still shocking, even in remembering all that happened. Eventually, I noted the even breaths seeping in and out of the pilot’s chest.

He survived the night. Well done.

The numbers on the monitor confirmed what the voice had said. Heart rate steady. Oxygen levels optimum. Blood pressure higher than it had ever reached the night before. Looking over the battered and broken man, covered in dried blood that had spilled to the bed and floor, I felt a rush of emotion break free from its cage in my chest, unleashing an irrepressible urge to cry.

I sobbed quietly, knowing it was both relief and exhaustion that the tears crawled down my face. I wasn’t really sure why it hit me so hard. I didn’t even know this man, and somehow his survival at my hands was overwhelming, bursting at the seams with a happiness I’d never experienced for a patient before.

But then I recalled what I’d done to make it possible.

Fear struck like a spark in the centre of my chest, rippling its way through my veins.

There’s no way I could explain this as a simple act of medical miracle. He’d know. Then they’d know. And everything I’d built would come crumbling down. I’d have to find a new planet, a new home, build a new clinic, leaving everything behind.

I just wanted to heal people. I didn’t want to be a part of either of their worlds, and I didn’t want to d-

A croaky moan escaped from the pilot’s lips, his eyes moving underneath the lids, struggling to open. He groaned louder, and it became clear all too quickly he was starting to feel his extensive injuries. Panic set in, realising I hadn’t had time to give him any anaesthetic or pain relief.

This was going to be a rough wake up.

A piercing whimper bellowed from his chest, startling me into focus. With the trolley at hand I wrenched open the draws in search of anything with a pain-relieving quality and prepared the med-injector with heavy fluid. He’d already started to move his limbs, presumably in a way to understand what was happening, and another strained yell echoed in the room, sending a shiver rocketing down my spine. I jammed the needle into the IV cannula port, pushing in the medicine without much of a thought to appropriate dosage.

I just needed to stop him moving.

He began hollering even harder, tears welling in his eyes as he started to thrash against the mattress. Snatching at his wrists, I slammed them back down on the bed.

“It’s okay! You’re okay! I know it hurts but you’ve got to give the painkiller time to work. I promise it’s going to be alright!” 

His eyes flew open, an obvious distress burning from behind brown irises. They flickered over my blood-stained clothes, then locked into mine, pleading, begging for me to do something to take away the agony.

“I know,” I said softly, a more tender edge to my voice. “I know it hurts. I’m doing all that I can. Please just stay still. It will get better. Please.”

The pilot drew in a deep, haggard breath, his bottom lip trembling. Eventually his jaw clenched as our eyes remained fixed, a silent pact of trust hanging in the air. It took me by surprise, how easy it was to calm him, and I seized the chance to soothe him even further.

“My name is Alex, I’m a doctor,” I explained. “Your ship crashed just outside my clinic. You were hurt, badly. You fell unconscious and I brought you in here to treat your injuries.”

Such a simple explanation for the truly gargantuan effort I had performed.

I wonder if he’ll ever know how close to death he was.

It wasn’t the time to tell him now, not when he seemed so scared. There was some semblance of understanding in his features, dark bushy eyebrows furrowed in thought for a moment, only for his eyes to shut again as he withheld a pained cry. I released my grip from his right wrist, placing my hand in his to squeeze gently. An act of sympathy, something I had done many times for people in distress. Even the small movement was enough to make him yelp.

Kriff. I forgot his arm was broken.

“Sorry!” I squeaked. He was still wincing. “Let me try and fix that.”

It was obvious how wrong the angle appeared in his forearm, beginning to prepare more local anaesthetic into the injector handle. I shot the needle a few centimetres above the fracture, the pilot barely flinching. Compared to the rest of his injuries it would likely have felt like nothing at all.

“I need to set this okay? Your arm is going to feel numb in a minute or two. I’ll be as quick as I can.”

His nod was measured, careful not to move anymore than he had to. I left him for a moment to find my universal cast and a sling, giving the injection a few moments to filter through his tissue and into the nerves. When I returned I could see some of the pain medication had already started to take hold, the sting of discomfort in his eyes beginning to waver, his muscles losing their tension and relaxing ever so slightly into the mattress. I prepared the cast, cutting the shapes out for his fingers and thumb, getting it ready for quick application.

“Poe,” he said slowly, his voice croaky and filled with restraint. “My name is Poe.”

I met his gaze again, trying my hardest to put forward an aura of confidence, even in my exhaustion. “Nice to meet you, Poe,” I smiled. With a lightened touch, a finger trailed softly down his right forearm. “Can you feel this?”

“A little,” he whispered. It was clearly hard for him to find his voice again. “It’s kind of… fuzzy.”

“Do you think I could try and set your arm now? I can wait if you prefer.”

“I can handle it.”

Underneath his lips I could imagine gritted teeth, clenching hard, bracing for the pain. It occurred to me then maybe this wasn’t the first time he’d broken a bone.

Without another word I pulled the X-ray unit’s arm up towards his fracture site, hoping he didn’t notice the splashes of his blood smattering the machine. Pressing down on the image button revealed a better picture in comparison to the absolute mess his femur had been. Only his radius was broken, in an even line, no splintering to be seen.

Finally something easy.

With two hands around his arm on either side of the fracture, I poised myself for a quick pull and twist. Poe’s muscles tensed underneath my grip.

“Just try to relax, it will make it much easier,” I insisted.

He drew in a deep breath, and the tension released from underneath my fingertips. I’d learned in my experience not to tell patients exactly when I was going to perform something painful. Something about the surprise of it somehow made it hurt less. So with one fluid movement I pulled and rotated the bone back into place, knowing even before I shot the X-ray it would be aligned. Poe was crushing his eyelids closed, waiting for me to move again.

“It’s okay, I got it.”

His eyes opened, meeting me with a look of surprise. I’d already begun to position the cast, bending the malleable plastic to the contours of his limb.

“First try?” he marvelled. I nodded, while trying to rein in my ego. “Never had someone get it on the first try.”

I swallowed hard. “I, uh... I wasn’t so lucky with your femur.” I flicked through the previous X-rays, pointing to the multiple shots of my attempts to fix the break. His eyes widened, mouth in a small ‘o’.

“That was my leg?” he gasped, “And you put it back?”

Both of our eyes glanced to the wound on his thigh. It was closed.

But I didn’t put any bacta on it.

Poe’s disbelief distracted him from my own. What I’d done last night with my crude attempt at Force healing had managed to not only mend the life-threatening severing of his artery, but also somehow pulsed enough energy to knit his wound back together, leaving a sealed laceration where the deep hole had been. Dread filled me again, weighing down so forcefully I didn’t want to move.

How am I going to explain this?

“T-thank you. For getting the bacta into it so quickly. Must have some good quality stuff.”

Thank every particle in the universe. He suspected nothing.

I moved slightly to position myself in front of the trolley that stored evidence of the low quality bacta solution and salve I had used for his chest wound and burns, and feigned a smile of appreciation.

“Just doing my job.”

All of a sudden it seemed to hit him, the situation he was in. His questions came out in rapid fire, desperate for clarification.

“Wait, where am I? What happened to my ship? Where’s BB-8?”

He began to rise from the mattress, wincing at the many injury points as he pulled himself into an upright position on the bed. The quick movement evidently made him dizzy, as he pulled his newly casted arm onto the bed railing to stabilise a wobble.

“Woah, just hold on a minute there,” I snipped, doctor mode engaged. “You’ve still got some serious injuries that need time to heal. Nasty burns, a collection of broken bones and the remnants of a punctured lung. Now bacta can be a miracle cure but it still needs more time before you start moving around again, or you’re going to ruin all the progress I made.”

Poe looked as if he was going to argue, but as my eyes bore into his, he recoiled back into the bed, sighing from both the pain of movement and the lack of answers.

“I was in the middle of an important mission okay?” he stressed. “There are people who are waiting on me. I need to get a message back to the Resistance. To tell them I’m out of commission.”

I tensed. The thought of the Resistance coming here to pick up their injured pilot was enough to make my heart beat faster. Sure, maybe Poe didn’t suspect anything, but the likelihood of convincing force sensitive people like Leia Organa, or the scavenger girl….

Attempting to fool them into thinking I’d healed this man with a bit of brute force and bacta would be near on impossible. But I couldn’t prevent Poe from contacting anybody without arousing even more suspicion. I’d just have to go along with whatever he wanted until I could formulate some kind of plan.

“Alright, how about I get you my transmitter and you promise not to try and move until I say so?” I offered, the tone in my voice not really implying that no could be an appropriate answer.

“Sure thing doc,” he agreed.

Maker, I hate when people call me that.

I made my way over to my tech station, using the moment to give him a couple of the answers he’d been so desperate for. “You’re on a remote clinic on Raxus, about 3000 kilometres- uh… klicks, from Raxulon. Your ship… Well, I haven’t been outside since it exploded at my front door. And your droid unit… I haven’t seen.” I realised quickly how insensitive this information came out when I looked up from my rummaging to Poe’s horrified expression. He began to sit upwards again, giving even less care to his wounds, forcing me to rush back to stop him. “I haven’t checked outside yet!”

“Why haven’t you been out there?” he demanded, eyes flaming.

“Maybe because I was stuck in here saving your life? And how was I supposed to know you had an astromech droid with you?”

He huffed, seeing the logic in my question. “Can you please check if BB is okay?”

I raised an eyebrow, curious at how much emotion he was committing to this piece of equipment. All of the medical droids I’d come into contact with over the years were extremely flat personality wise. Intelligent and useful, but I’d never grown any type of attachment to them. Nothing like Poe seemed to have with this BB-8 droid.

“Fine,” I sighed. “I’ll go look for the BB unit. Just please stay in bed. And… prepare for the worst.”

Underpromise, overdeliver. One of the many phrases I’d recited during my medical training. I just really hoped the latter would be the case in this situation.

The latch of the clinic door closed softly behind me, the crisp morning atmosphere somewhat refreshing for a moment or two, until I shook myself into focus to assess the completely destroyed X-wing ship consuming my vision. With sunshine finally illuminating the environment, rolling green hills of the countryside extending beyond the horizon, I scanned the blackened metal skeleton of the ship, ashes smattered all over the ground, glass and electrical wires splayed everywhere.

Well, this doesn’t exactly ignite hope.

Walking around what was left of the X-wing, I examined the surrounding area for any trace of a droid - not just the shine of metal, but the possible tracks left by a robot who was looking for its master. I walked slowly into the field behind the crash site, my eyes surveying every bit of ground, hoping to see any metallic glint that might indicate an intact droid.

Since the clinic was the only building for a few kilometres, there was hardly another structure it could be hiding behind, or lodged in. I almost wanted to keep walking, washing my hands of all of this, so I didn’t have to go back and tell Poe his obviously beloved droid hadn’t survived like he did. But another ruined machine caught my attention.

My comm-tower was flattened into nothing - steel, wiring and black plastic flattened into an artificial pancake.

Kriff, more bad news for Poe.

With my only means of communication squished there was no way any of my tech could send a signal far enough to reach the Resistance, let alone the next village over. And now I would have to make the weeklong trek back to Raxulon to get another one.

This day is kicking my ass.

With a long sigh, I ventured towards the ruined X-wing, assuming if I hadn’t found BB-8 by now, it must have been pulverised by the explosion I narrowly avoided last night. I searched the hollow structure of the ship, hoping for any scrap of metal that could be related to the droid, but it was all so black, covered in soot and melted, everything beginning to mutate into some other portion of the machine. When I skimmed over what was left of one of the wings, there was still a rounded hole I assumed BB-8 would have been housed during flights. An empty hole. There was always a possibility the BB droid could have gone searching for help beyond my clinic, but again, there wasn't a trace of movement in the dirt track leading away to the nearest village.

I think it’s time to be the bearer of bad news.

I extricated myself from the mangled ship, looking back towards the front walls of my clinic, noticing now the remnants of the explosion that had left countless dark stains over the light blue paint, along with a few cracks and impact points where metal had hit the cement. The bushes I’d planted a few months ago in time for this planet’s version of spring had been scorched, most of the green overtaken by grey and black soot. On closer inspection, it became obvious one had been split in half, the edges of leaves opening up to a large gap.

I quickened my pace and kneeled in front of the jumbled shrub, my hands diving in to push burnt leaves out of way, finally discovering a large metal ball of orange and white leaning on the blue concrete wall. A little cracked and dirty, but seemingly intact.

Oh wait, where’s the head?

Scurrying around on my hands and knees, I felt around the bushes once more, moving along the line of the wall. The twigs were scraping against the skin of my arms, but I was too excited for the possibility of some good news that I ignored the sting they caused.

Unexpectedly my hand struck something hard, pushing the stiff lower branches out of my view to find a domed head dug into the ground. Picking it up, I brushed away some of the dirt, surveying for any obvious damage. Its antennae was crooked, a few deep scratches slicing the metal, but it all seemed fairly superficial. With the head in hand, I strode back to the body unit, beaming with the thought I could ease even a little bit of Poe’s worry.

My delight was swiftly dissolved when setting the pieces together. I’d assumed the magnet would hold and the droid would spring back to life. Instead, the head slipped straight off, sinking into the ground once more with a muffled thud.

Yeah, that seems about right.

*

“I have good news and bad news,” I declared sheepishly as I walked into view of Poe, lugging in a separated BB-8. His face burst into an illustration of relief, then confusion as his brain finally registered the image of his dear friend separated into two pieces, and lifeless.

As I placed the metal components onto the hospital bed at the side of Poe’s leg, he looked up at me. “This is the bad news right?” His hands tentatively checked over the BB unit, attempting what I had done not minutes ago, and watched the head piece slide back over the metal ball and dive into the mattress.

“Um… Actually… This was meant to be the good news,” I grimaced. “The bad news is that my comm-tower was completely flattened by your ship. None of my transmitter tech is going to be able to send out any messages until I can get another one built.”

Poe’s jaw clenched, and I only noticed now the dark stubble that glittered the lower half of his face.

“And when would that be exactly?” he queried sharply. I didn’t like the tone of his voice.

“At least another week if I left now. But I can’t leave you like this, you’re still in critical condition.”

It was obvious he was hiding his frustration, hands scrunched into balls. “They can’t wait that long.”

I scrambled at any answer that might settle him. “I mean, maybe some of the villagers could help, but there’s no guarantee-”

“Then get them to help!” he exploded, making me step back. At seeing the startled look on my face he softened, realising the severity of his demand. “I’m sorry, but this is just… so important. I know you’ve already done more than I could have ever asked of someone, but I still need more of your help. The fate of the galaxy depends on it.” His eyes glistened with hope, a silent plea, sending a cold wave of unease down my spine. He held a bandaged arm out, hand open, reaching toward me.

I didn’t want to be a part of this. It was exactly what I had run from for so long. Even now the immediate urge was to bolt out the front door, leaving behind this stranger who could unravel everything I’d built.

But there was something about the expression on his face, the desperation in his eyes, calling out to me. I was all he had right now. I was his only lifeline to put him back on whatever journey he had been travelling before fate made him, quite literally, crash into me.

“I mean, if the fate of the galaxy depends on it…” I mumbled, placing my hand tentatively in his. “Okay. I’ll help you get back home.”

~

Next Chapter

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[palmett-hoes]

what's your take on the foxes mbti?

oh buddy ur never gonna believe this but i wrote a foxes MBTI post YEARS ago

im also not into mbti anymore and haven't been for many years so that post is probably still more accurate and in-depth than what i could give you now. i’m just gonna copy the whole thing but i read it over and it still totally vibes w how i understand the characters, like way more than i was expecting it to. i only made one edit (it’s marked) and it was to add a detail not change anything

i hope you’re really really into mbti otherwise this’ll probably be gobbeldegook

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i used to be obessively into mbti so here’s an analysis based on cognitive functions mostly.

SKIP IF YOU WANT. for anyone with no idea how it works, here’s a quick rundown: cognitive functions are about the way people think, process, and prioritize information, not necessarily how they act, though people who think the same way often act the same. the 8 letters that make up a type represent how people process and prioritize internal and external stimuli. every letter actually has an ‘internal’ and 'external’ form so there’s Thinking (internal(ti) and external(te)), Feeling (internal(fi) and external(fe)), Sensing (internal(si) and external(se)), and iNtuition(internal(ni) and external(ne)) t’s always go with a corresponding and opposite f (like ti and fe always go together), same with s’s and n’s (ex: si and ne always go together). a set of  t, f, s, and n in a specific order makes an mbti type.

neil: intp (ti ne si fe)

neil has incredible analytical ability although it’s very programmed for survival but he’s also a fast thinker and very quick to adapt to new environments. he also approaches things from original angles that other people dont consider, all that sounds like high ti/ne. the lower functions fit well too. in times of stress, he returns to old habits and falls back on what’s familiar, that’s classic low si. his emotions are also very exterior. he’s bad with other people from lack of exposure, but he’s committed to harmony between those close to him and has an impeccable ability to read the emotional states of others while being completely oblivious of his own, and his sense of self is tied to exterior things like exy, friends, keys, and legal documents (lol) that’s fe

andrew: intj (ni te fi se)

ni is really hard to describe but it has to do with being able to draw conclusions from scattered input, which fits with andrew’s uncanny ability to spot lies and obsession with finding out the truth, especially with high te, which is about spatial order and logic, think of how prioritized he is with the physical order of things: who sits where, who wears what, etc. a lot of people want to make andrew infj i bet as like a “subversive reading” but he’s definitely not. i used to be really close to an infj and they have hyper-empathy, as in she would describe not just caring about other people and being able to read their emotional states but literally feeling the things the people around her felt. this is a common result of the ni/fe combo, and the reason why andrew is definitely not infj. tertiary fi fits very well instead because andrew is deeply attuned to his own inner emotional state. he’s self-confident and doesn’t care about other people’s perception of him, but he’s also very concerned with his own feelings and understanding them, even if they’re repressed. he’s also very aware of his physical surroundings, which plays into his deductive ability, although it’s not his focus. that’s low se

kevin: estj (te si ne fi)

kevin is a classic estj. he’s controlling, demanding, and driven. he tries to control the actions of those around him and gets very distressed when things dont run smoothly, as well as having strong feelings about improving efficiency. high te people make great managers. kevin’s whole story arc is about breaking old habits, which is a very si problem. it has to do with trusting and craving memory and familiarity, and explains kevins need for endless repetition. he’s innovative, though, coming up with new strategies and drills (ne), it’s just based on what’s already familiar, and you can see him spiral into creating all possible worst-case scenarios when he’s stressed (low ne stress reaction, they like to be prepared). finally, he’s a dick, but he cares about other people and wants to improve their lives, as well as being very reliant on other people’s perceptions of him to define his own self-image (low fe)

dan: esfj (fe si ne ti)

dan’s top priority, over everything else, is her team. she wants her team to improve, she wants her team to win, she wants her team to work together. it’s all about the collective. we also see that she’s very open with others and makes a lot of effort to both make new ties and maintain old ones, that’s high fe. she’s sentimental and attached to the past too (si)  esp the photo wall, but we also see her very unwilling to let go of the past ie the monsters but eventually willing to change and grow to mend team cohesion (ne). we also see the fight in underlying logic (low ti) with her: she knows the team needs the monsters to cooperate but she cant figure out how to do it

matt: enfj (fe ni se ti)

so enfj’s experience infj hyper-empathy too, but to a slightly lesser extent (primary fe is more group cohesion, secondary fe is more understanding others), and through this we see matt’s easy-going open friendliness and ability to befriend even prickly little neil, because he has an extremely good sense of what other people are feeling and need, it also explains why he doesn’t hold a grudge against the cousins in the same way dan does, because he understands where they were coming from. se is associated with a general boisterousness for life, as it’s about experiencing the world around you, which explains matt’s happy-go-lucky disposition and puppydog behavior. the ti aspects mostly go into supporting fe/ni empathic senses

allison: entj (te ni se fi)

i mean, allison’s controlling, both in that she orders other people around and in that her physical being and space are very planned and organized (her clothes, her hair, her makeup, etc) but at the same time there isn’t much sentimentality to her, like how she doesn’t care when her car was destroyed. she easily replaces things because she cares about the object’s purpose, not its history and that all smacks of high te/ni. and i mean, the se definitely contributes to her love of designer things and killer looks, because she cares about the world immediately around her, and why live if not in luxury? and fi? is there any character more aggressively self-confident than allison reynolds?? going against her parents’ wishes for her takes a really strong, independent sense of self, but we also see the problems that can come from not worrying about other people, in how she starts fights and can be abrasive and catty

renee: infp (fi ne si te)

okay this one was really hard tbh. a list of other considerations: isfp, istp, and infj. it’s very easy to read renee as high fe because she’s kind, but i think it’s a mischaracteration of why she’s kind. it’s not because it comes naturally to her, it’s because it’s a conscious choice that makes her feel better about herself. high fi people often read as fe because they’re so comfortable with themselves and in tune with their own needs that they can then go and provide for others. i associate her religion with ne, because contemplation and acceptance of the divine later in life is a very metaphysical undertaking that undoubtedly requires a lot of abstract thought. renee’s storyline also revolves a lot around using things from her past and putting a conscious effort into leaving things from her past behind (how she still uses the skills she learned from her past in new ways ie sparring with andrew and protecting the upperclassmen v/s how she held on to her knives even when she knew it was detrimental to her moving on) this sounds like si. her protective instincts also feed into the te need for order, but it’s a looser leash than say andrew, as it’s lower on her function stack but still present

nicky: esfp (se fi te ni)

godd nicky is like a prototypical esfp. i mean nicholas “sex, drugs, and parties” hemmick cant be anything but se dominant. nicky is all about living it up and living in the moment. like he’s sporadic and ive seen it lead people to think he could be enfp but he doesn’t think enough about the meaning of things to be ne dominant (like how he makes somewhat predatory jokes and such, he’s all about the here-and-now while ne is about the past and future simultaneously). also he of all characters has incredibly prominent fi, as his whole character is about living unashamedly as himself as a gay man and the immense self-awareness and inner strength it takes not only to come out to unaccepting parents but also to leave and start a new life when they rejected him. however, fi is also indicative of his communication problems with his family, as he’s unable to tell that the cousins are fundamentally different from him in their needs and boundaries, leading him to pushing them, making them uncomfortable, and being unable to help them, because he’s unable to understand them. the rest are much more hidden, but a party boy shopaholic like nicky would probably need some amount of te order in like an organized chaos fashion (and he’s often headcanoned as liking to throw parties) and you do see him become somewhat pushy, even controlling in those scenarios. ni is the hardest but could maybe be seen in how he’s attuned to the cousins reactions for all that he cant predict them/doesn’t do anything on his own part to prevent them (the way he handles andrew is like if someone poked a rattlesnake knowing damn well what it would do and then freaked out when he got bit)

aaron: istj (si te fi ne)

im a little iffy on this one and worry it might be an analysis based on his trauma instead of complimentary to it, but aaron’s arc is about breaking out of his habit of holding on to the past. he refuses to work towards moving on from his mother’s death, refuses to listen to things that contradict his preconceived notions, and refuses to make changes in his life that could improve it. that’s unhealthy si. he’s really a very unhealthy istj, and most of his traits manifest through his unhappiness with his life. take his te. that would imply that he needs control over his surroundings, but aaron is incredibly bitter and unhappy BECAUSE he doesn’t have control of his surroundings. he doesn’t get to make his own choices, he doesn’t get to control his space, and he hates it. his relationship with katelyn is also indicative of being an istj. it’s stable, not a passionate fling, but aaron is mocked for wanting that white picket fence, married with kids in the suburbs kind of life, and his relationship, which is his primary source of happiness, is built on stability, which is a very si thing to do. in terms of fi, it is aaron that ultimately forces change between himself and andrew. he may have been pushed but he ultimately came down to him knowing what made him happy and what made him miserable and acting on that. also, he’s an ornery asshole who clearly doesn’t care what other people think of him. fi. i dont really have anything to say in terms of ne, probably because he’s so unhealthy but also because he’s not too explored. heyy istj’s make great doctors

wymack: isfj (si fe ti ne)

okay this one was genuinely the hardest to decide on but ultimately i came to the conclusion that wymack, much like renee, is such a developed person that he loses many defining traits of the functions, and can be read in many different ways. so: wymack’s primary goal is the safety and betterment of other people (ie his team). he wants to help people overcome their pasts, which is a very atypical approach to si, but is si nonetheless. on a personal level, too, he’s never able to move on from people, and specifically never moved on from kayleigh,  continuing their shared dream of an exy team for abused kids long after her death. as ive said before, fe in a secondary position is about deep understanding of other people, and wymack’s ability to understand what other people are struggling through is legendary. the ti mostly serves as support to the fe, serving as the analytical backup in allowing him to understand others. as for ne: he is most definitely an innovator with unusual ideas, or the foxes wouldn’t exist

riko: estp (se ti fe ni)

riko is basically what happens when an estp goes bad down to the core. he’s obsessed with personal glory and immediate self-fulfillment (se) he has no impulse control or fear of consequences. interestingly, high se is often associated with athleticism, because high se people are intensly focused on their surroundings (exy). his ti is also super unhealthy as he gets obsessed with ideas that dont really work with objective reality, like his obsession with ownership and power dynamics despite them not actually being efficient, even backwards. the tertiary fe he uses to manipulate. he doesn’t empathize with others, but he can tell their emotional state and what’s important to them, and uses it to coerce them and destroy their sense of self, like how he knew he could get neil to the nest by threatening andrew. EDIT: /additionally, fe people especially in the lower half of the function stack tend to derive their sense of self from the perceptions of others around them, which riko very much shows in how he needs to be acknowledged as the best and won’t allow any competition for his title, as well as his desperation for acknowledgement from his family/. finally, that ni allowed him to keep multiple plans in place focused on one ultimate goal: getting kevin back. the sheer amount of schemes he sets up in order to fool and push people the way he wants is honestly kinda impressive, but he’s a toxic shithead and im glad he’s rotting. definitely not representative of all estp’s

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this is honestly SO funny to read back a few years later bc HOOOOO boy was i way too into this stuff. and this was written a couple years after my Peak MBTI Obsession, which was honestly scary

[honey-makki]

well, i guess sappy posts are better late than never. i can’t believe i’ve only been on anime tumblr for 8 months and writing for 6. it’s crazy how influential my time here has been on me and the relationships i’ve fostered. i guess this is also my thank you for 2.5k because i hit that recently. im so thankful and grateful you have let me create a nice lil coffeeshop in my own corner of tumblr. I wouldn’t trade it for anything, (ok maybe some things but not many). I will be disgustingly sappy and in love with people under the cut. beware of cavities from the sweetness.

@heauxzenji​ god you are really the love of my mf life. i talk to you more than i talk to my irl bestfriends and i live with them. i’m glad i can wake you up with horny thoughts everyday but its kinda homophobic that you are three hours behind me. manifesting that this year we get to see each other so our gay horny love can be actualized.

@sugardaddykenma​ lin you are simultaneously my love and my aunt and i wouldn’t have it any other way. please send me more snaps of you screaming because the really make me laugh. im happy we are genuine friends and i care about you so much. will flee to canada on a moments notice, on your beck and call my love.

@satendou​ spencer you are my wife and live teasingly close to me. i’m so happy i got drunk that one night and you messaged me because i was way too nervous to message you even though i wanted to. you are fantastic and oneday we will both not be ghosts and really catch up. i love you regardless.

@keijiskitten​ laura. my baby kitty lauwa. please come be my irl catgirl i will buy the nicest collars. you are so so sweet and genuine and im blessed to have oun in my life. sometimes royal!au sneaks into my head when im doing other stuff just so you know that you have fully ruined me as a person but i love it.

@crushzone​ nin. my god you are the sweetest person on this godforsaken website. every interaction i’ve ever had with you has been nothing less than wonderful. thank you for being horny w me and drawing the cutest fucking photo of me and shinkami ever. now watch mha so we can talk about aizawa,

@sgwrscrsh​ skye baby girl. mwah. a kiss. thank you for reminding me ao3 exists all those months ago when you sent me in another life. you have ruined me as a person but i sent you that monster fic so maybe we are even. i love you. thank you for the christmas gift i loved it SO much.

@cno-inbminor​ kay. quick friends bc we are same person and i love u. please stream urr next baking session it makes me happy. also townes!sakusa. just a reminder so you can think about that sweater. 

@samuslut​ wing we haven’t talked too much but i just want you to know i love you so much and admire your work and world building. you are a fantastic writer and a great person

@stallionissei​ miss cas!! we aren’t the closest but talking to you is literally always a pleasure and i love it. i hope your move is going ok and you all get settled down soon! lets talk soon!

@lesbians4yaku​ joy. my first love. you were one of my first friends on tumblr and im ever thankful for that. i care about you so so so much. just seeing your name and you exist makes me smile. we should talk about more evolutions soon because that was very very fun. enjoy your nips and this kiss im sending u *mwah*

to everyone in tumblr babies, i’m so glad i was there in the start of my journey. its such a safe and fun space. thank you for letting me tease *people* about glasses fetishes and just go buck wild in the thirst chats. thank you for voting me horniest member <3 @ceo-of-daichi @hqsoftboysupremecy @scorpiosanssexy @nonexistent-social-life 

to my fellow gravediggers and funeral home employees. yes ive been in the server for like 3 months and yes i am already 8th in rank, no i don’t know how to shut up. thanks for dealing with me. You are my favorite home and i want to cook all you a meal and pet the babies. @xakusa @lumos-flies @tsumue @iwaasfairy @sasa-writes-fandom-things @sweet-sugu @keijiiszn​ 

god, to all of my other mutuals i love you so much and you are all badass. i would fight the horny police and whatever 12 year old kids are in your inbox for all of you. you are all immensely talented and i still wonder why some of you follow me. thank you for every single reblog, comment, advice or like you’ve given me bc it shoots serotonin directly into my heart. which isn’t how its supposed to work but feels nice anyways.

@undermattsun @onefortyninecm @rat-suki @bakatenshii @godjo  @dxddykeiji @saetyrn9 @introloves @pomsuki @lookslikeleese @tetsou @whats-her-quirk @blahkugo @dearsakusa @sugawarakoushihoe @stonersugawara @koutarouthighs @prettysetterbaby @heyhinata @seita @present-mel. 

im going to stop tagging because m tumblr has crashed four times and im already close to max and i really really don’t want to type this out again. thank you to every person who has supported me and i can’t wait to see where this year leads us.

[ifdragonscouldtalk]

hey you do not know me but i want you to know that you do not need to feel scared about what you are feeling.

bad feelings come and go

even if right now you feel as if it does not feel better, it will not go away, one day it will. even if this does not feel like it is going to end, or that these feelings of depression will take over, keep your head up and push through this because one day you are going to look back on yourself and be immensely proud of how strong you are, how brave you were for going through what you did.

depression is a bitch. be a bitch right back. do not let it have its way with you.

since you said there was a lacking in positive interaction in your life, here are some things i like about you

your writing, i found your essay and it led me to your tumblr where i have since found your ao3

the banner to your account, i think it is so cute and i especially love jim’s outfit and the earrings mccoy and spock have

your opinion over mckirk, i totally agree with you there. i personally think that jim and mccoy are a perfect example of platonic soulmates

our shared love of oddthesungod like wow that man can draw

your effing name! talon is like the coolest name ever.

rok. need i say more.

Wrapped Around My Wrist (Choking Off My Breath) - this. oh my god. i cried while reading this i loved it very much it is definitely in my top 10 fics i have ever read

i know my writing must not be that great or grammatically correct but i saw your post and felt as if i needed to say something. if this comes off as stupid or unneeded, just save it for a time when it is. :) goodbye

hey anon

despite what i say, i really dont cry easily. its a side effect of my medications that i hate -- it takes so damn much for me to cry and most of the time i really wish it were easier because it always makes me feel better

this message made me cry

im sitting her sobbing because it has been so long since i felt seen like that haha. thank you. thank you so much. your words may not be needed but they are so appreciated. ive struggled for so long that even though i know what you say is true, it means so much that someone cares enough to remind me and to recognize that i can be proud of myself for where i am now. and i laughed when you told me to be a bitch right back. that's definitely my attitude this week haha

im honestly so overjoyed that you found me through my essay haha. i was so scared to link it to my tumblr because i like to keep my personal and online life separate but it brings me so much joy that it touched you so much you sought me out. and my banner. i thought no one looked at it, honestly. i hated how that piece turned out but i was so proud working on it and i was just so happy that i got to create it that when it didn't get notes i wanted it to be somewhere. im- im so unbelievably overjoyed that you noticed it and took the time to look at the details. god.

i have a truly unhealthy obsession with odd haha. truly a sun god, he brightens up my day so much when he posts

i cant believe you're one of the few people who read rok. again, im so so proud of that work... and wrapped around my wrist.... definitely my two favorite fics ive written. i reread them pretty often haha how embarrassing. im so pleased that they're your favorites too, i put so much into them. im sorry wrapped around my wrist made you cry though ;v;

i want to save this but i need you to know that this has just. its made my day. im just going to curl up and cry awhile and hopefully ill feel better in the morning. thank you. thank you so much. the fact that you took the time to try and cheer me up.... it really means the world right now. i appreciate you and all my friends so much.

thank you love