#like i have no doubts that wicked will be as okay of an adaption as les mis

[perhapspluto]

we as a society should have made an example out of tom hooper while we still had a chance. now every movie musical has the "ooo we recorded live singing" gimmick and no one has LEARNED

[its-your-girl-geekerella]

Wicked Movie Review

Spoilers Ahead. (Obviously)

Okay, I saw it on opening night release day. I've just been busy. And here are my thoughts:

Pre-watch. I was hoping for the best. The trailers were amazing, and the budget seemed sufficient for all it wanted to do. The vocals seemed a little off, but that was only because they had to make it "fit" for the trailer score. So I had high hopes!

But I was also preparing for the worst. After all, movie adaptations of musicals have a bad reputation for a reason. And all the promotion they were doing? I was certain they were compensating for something. And besides that, I had almost no faith (again, aside from what I heard in the trailer) in Ariana Grande. I don't really listen to her music, but I've heard a few of her songs. I honestly didn't think she could do musical theatre.

And boy, was I wrong.

Post-watch. It. Was. Amazing. I absolutely LOVED it. Ariana CRUSHED it! I think she did better than some Glindas on Broadway! In every scene leading up to the Ozdust Ballroom, I hated her. And I LOVED hating her. I think some Glindas just don't have that hateability, or they're too charming. But not Ariana. And during "Popular"? I absolutely loved it! She was great!

Cynthia Erivo did great, too. Her voice singing the riff at the end of "Defying Gravity" will certainly take getting used to, but it was, objectively, good. Her acting was on point, and I absolutely loved watching her. Say what you will about the woman's poster dilemma, the woman has a powerful presence onscreen. I honestly never doubted her ability.

Some random thoughts:

The script. The script was practically word-for-word of the musical. Some people might find it annoying and predictable. I, for one, found it charming and-- frankly-- reassuring. I knew what was coming a lot of the time, even if they did change some minor plot points (if you can even call them "plot points"; like I said, they were minor and didn't change the course of the story at all). For example, Mr. Thropp doesn't already have Elphaba enrolled at the school in the movie. But because I know how the story goes, I was sitting in the theater saying to myself, "He's gonna say 'go with her'". And guess what? He did.

Unfortunately, the script being word-for-word (and a lot of theatre kids knowing certain lines from the musical) partially ruins the impact or comedy of certain lines. The most notable one was when Fiyero and Elphaba are in the woods with the cub. Elphaba informs him that he's bleeding, and says, "It must have scratched you." He replies, a bit disassociated because of her touch, "Yeah... or maybe... it scratched me or something." Typically, in the theater, Broadway, regional, or high school, the audience laughs at this line. You know how many people laughed at it in the movie theater? Zero. Zilch. Except me. The delivery was AWFUL. I honestly can't believe that Jon didn't have that line reshot. Which brings me to Jonathan Bailey.

Jonathan Bailey is... a good actor? I personally haven't seen him in anything other than Wicked. But I do know that he is a good looking actor. However, I do believe that he was miscast for this role for three reasons. 1) Like I said, the comedy was not exactly there. Another example: "I've been thinking" "So I heard" However, I won't count that one against him, as I feel that one was mostly Cynthia's fault. 2) At first, I thought that Cynthia Erivo would look too old to play Elphaba, but I got over it really quickly. It was easy for me to see her as a college-aged student. And let's be honest, Ariana Grande will always look like a child, so that was never a problem. Jonathan Bailey, though? He doesn't look like a college student. He looks like a really hot 36-year-old man. And this kinda goes into my last point. 3) He was too intentional. I think Fiyero's character is dynamic in a variety of ways, and Jonathan's portrayal seems more like "Act II Fiyero" than "Act I Fiyero". Act I Fiyero's whole deal is that he's extremely loose. And while, yes, Elphaba calls it out as a façade, I think it's still a part of him that is a bit dumb (see the disassociated "scratched" comment or the "thinking" comment). I think if Jonathan had tried to play Fiyero more "dumb jock", it would've worked better, because his natural acting inclination would've counteracted it just enough.

I feel bad for complaining about Jonathan Bailey for so long. So onto the songs! The score was amazing. The music was amazing. The vocals were amazing. My favorite song was "What Is This Feeling?" The camera angles in this scene were amazing, and the choreography slaps so hard.

Right before "One Short Day", I thought to myself, "I sure hope we get an Idina and Kristin cameo!" Guess what happened. Truthfully, I barely heard a word they were singing, I was too busy bouncing in my chair and fangirling with one of my friends to hear them.

If there's someone I didn't mention (I'm looking at you Ethan and Michelle), it's because they did a good job and I don't have any particular opinion on them. Overall, I really enjoyed the movie! My favorite song was "What Is This Feeling", Jonathan Bailey was the weakest part of the movie, and it was a lot better than I thought it would be. And it was really fun to fangirl with other theatre kids.

[lunarhobbits]

okay connie forgive me for adding to your post BUT i made a list of what i think is most likely to least likely to be cut. keep in mind i have not listened to the full show in like 10 years so this is based on memories and vibes

a sentimental man - side character song, which usually are first on the chopping block for movie adaptations. wizard is being played by jeff goldblum and while him singing is kind of a novelty i feel like it's not likely they'd straight up have him do this whole song.

dear old shiz - clocks in at just under a minute and a half on the album, if i know movie musicals they'll just replace it with an establishing shot and instrumental snippet

something bad - studio doesn't want to risk twitter/tiktok/whatever users going "HAHA SINGING GOAT" and memeing it to death bc that means they arent Taking This Seriously and wont buy tickets :((((

i'm not that girl - exact reason you said, "audience attention span no like slow song"

what is this feeling - okay here is where i really start doubting they'll get cut entirely but i do think it entirely possible that they're gonna edit this one down so it's less gay and it won't feel the same at all

no one mourns the wicked - opening number so they probably wont cut it entirely (tho sweeney todd cut the opening number for the movie adaptation so. ig it's not completely impossible and without precedent if they do) HOWEVER i'm fairly certain that they'll probably cut chunks from it, probably the "have another drink of green elixir" and every other sung part of elphaba's flashback backstory. also bc they don't want to tip off the audience that the green elixir guy is supposed to be jeff goldblum, who has an extremely distinctive speaking style, regardless of the fact that wicked has been playing for 20 years and also wikipedia is free

the wizard and i - PROBABLY escaping unscathed but if im being cynical and picking an elphie number most likely to get chopped up or cut out that ISNT im not that girl it's this one

one short day - nah they've gotta leave this one in so they can reveal the emerald city and go "whoaaaa wowwieee look at all this neat stuff that is def not cgi!!!!"

dancing through life - not getting cut. that's fiyeros big number and they got a fairly notable actor to play him

popular - literally one of the top songs of the show and ariana grande is gonna sing it. they would have to hate money

defying gravity - ABSOLUTELY not it's confirmed it's staying and they'd be insane to cut it

[everything-laito]

Do you think Laito might not like being touched as much as he makes it seem?

Oh definitely not, that man is so fucking touch starved like you wouldn't believe. Yes, the man FUCKS, but he likes to be in control of everything.

However, he is canonically the second least dominant out of him and his brothers. The least dominant is Subaru. It's shown a lot in HDB especially how he likes being reprimanded, like it's genuine excitement and arousal, and not like part of his calculated facade. He doesn't expect to be touched, hence his explosive reaction when something does. However there are sometimes (like in his Do-S CD) where he also has that same display of horny excitement. I mean when he talks wicked fast. Whenever Yui either talks back to him or even slaps him (my favorite choice in HDB), he's surprised, but quickly adapts to it.

Could this be part of his facade? Certainly, but he seems genuinely surprised when Yui gets a bit more ~spicy~ than usual:

Maniac 08:

ー Yui slaps him across the cheek Laito: …!? Yui: ( …!! I-I only wanted to give him a warning but…I raised my hand without realizing… ) Male teacher: Oi, what’s the matter? Yui: I-I’m sorry. It’s nothing. T-There was a mosquito on his cheek, that’s all… Laito: …What a shock. To get hit by Bitch-chan… Nfu~ But this feels kind of…good.

Maniac 09:

Yui: ーー Tell me! If you don’t tell me right now…I’ll punish you, okay? Laito: …! Yui: ( Wait! What am I saying!? ) Laito: Nn~…This is great…Nfu~ Say more! I want you to scold me, Bitch-chan! Come on! More…! Yui: ( I thought he’d get mad but instead he’s happy. )

In the latter scenario, there's no way Laito would get mad at that to begin with considering he knows he has the upper hand. And he could have brushed it off with "lol bruh, u serious?" but he gets surprised (given the "...!" and the "!?" in the other scenario). He literally says that he doesn't expect Yui of all people to hit him. And even if he is legitimately covering his excitement of that in a facade, he's shocked nonetheless.

But Laito seems to revel in being touched. I actually was talking about this with @diaphobic in the discord server the other day. And I'd have to agree with them, that Laito definitely likes being touched, and seems to be overwhelmed by it. Take this scene from Ecstasy 04:

Laito: Come on, touch my body…Try feeling around. Yui: …Like this? Laito: Come on. You’re just touching? Yui: … Laito: Nn…Aah…Great. That clumsiness is kind of nice, Bitch-chan… Being touched feels good, this is proof that I love you… It isn’t logic. What really matters are instincts and intuition… Love is just  a deduction from those…Nothing more than that. Yui: ( I’m just touching his body so I don’t really understand….But Laito-kun seems to be having a good time so I guess it’s fine. ) Laito: Nfu~ …Good…Amazing…I’ll touch you too. Let’s feel good together.

This is the first time in HDB where Laito actually instructs Yui to touch him, but regardless he still initiated it by asking her that. He’s still in control of the situation but yet he’s definitely pretty excited to do so. Here in one of my favorite HDB chapters Heaven 01, he asks Yui to drink his blood, and afterwards he has a very similar reaction to his Ecstacy 04 situation.

Laito: Nfu~ Exactly. In that case…Want to try sucking my blood? Yui: Yours? Laito: That’s right. You can drink your own, so you’re not gonna tell me you can’t drink mine, right? Yui: That’s true though. Laito: Nfu~ I’ve always wanted to know at least once what it’s like to be at the other end.

I do feel like that if Laito requested something he genuinely did not want to do, he wouldn’t have initiated it. Regardless of his facade or not, if it was something he was genuinely uncomfortable by, he would not have hinted at it, or at least have played 5D chess in order to get out of it. Similar to how he hid Yui from Richter in maniac 07. Even though Laito has no limits to what he can say, he does have his boundaries, albeit hidden. Throughout HDB and even MB+, it’s really hard for him to mention things about Cordelia outright. That’s a sensitive topic for him, and usually he avoids questions. Basically what I’m saying is that Laito would not be initiating things if he himself was as uncomfortable as the Cordelia topic.

However, could he be playing it up? He definitely could be, but considering the reactions and shock he gets from Yui talking back at him or slapping him, and when he gets the same reactions when he’s prepared and initiating those situations, I kind of doubt it. Laito acts horny a lot of the time, but you can see those nuances change depending on the situations a lot of the time.

Hope that makes sense! As always, if you have anything else you want me to clarify, have questions for, or want me to add onto something or have comments of your own, feel free to reach out as always!

Hope you have a good one, anon! -Corn

[jewishjanetandco]

morality & personal identity

the lumiat audio puts the lumiat, a version of the master, in-between missy and dhawan as.... an explanation of how the master survived. personally, i hate it. it doesn’t make sense as to who the master is, and involves a fundamental misunderstanding of human nature.

tl;dr: the lumiat is an interesting premise (having a valeyard-equivalent for the master) but the execution follows common tropes and feels false for the character of the master. 

one of the most prominent works of literature (in the western canon) that deals heavily with themes of identity and morality is none other than the strange case of dr. jekyll and mr. hyde (j&h). it’s been my favorite book for years and i’ve done so much analysis of it (just for the fun of it!) and one of the things i’ve noticed in all of the adaptions of it is that most of them just.......... miss the point.

(i’m going on a bit of a tangent here but it’s important for the point!)

most adaptions take their inspiration from a trio of plays that were published shortly after the novella was (late 1880s/1890s). each of these plays give jekyll a “pure, virtuous” love interest as well as a “temptress,” and the two women embody “good” and “evil” with hyde being an “evil” entity that threatens jekyll’s life-----

but in the novella, there are no love interests; it’s just jekyll doing drugs in order to feel better about himself while escaping the repressive nature of victorian society. hyde is not a possessing entity, nor an alternate identity; he is jekyll, just behaving in a truer-to-self fashion (hyde can do all of the wicked things he likes without it harming jekyll because he looks different, and he carries himself unburdened by societal expectations)

and that’s where most adaptations go wrong! by focusing on the relationship of good against evil, which is just.... very christian by nature. but the novella focuses on the choices people make---it’s jekyll’s choices that define who he is, more than any sense of predestination!

and as most adaptations focus on good vs evil, “the lumiat” audio can be read as one of those stories that takes that premise and falsely applies it to a character. in the musical, one of the board of directors of a hospital asks jekyll, “what happens to the evil?” when j talks about separating out the two

it’s a good question! if, with all of one’s wicked desires & impulses removed.... who would that person then be? certainly not whoever they were before; jekyll himself is shown as a mixture of good & bad impulses, after all

and the lumiat presents as “the embodiment of all the goodness in [the master].” okay. her sweetness, her niceness, her entire personhood, feel false, because the master would never present themself without some play on “master” as their title, and because the notion that missy “became good” while in the vault is completely false. 

she didn’t “become good” -- she chose to act in ways that suited the doctor, to become more like him in the hopes that he would see her and that they’d be friends again, and it didn’t work. he told her off for crying, saying she was probably trying to trick him, and refused to look at or touch her when she reached out to him

and then, on the colony ship, she tried to act in his image only for her own past to catch up on her and to be abandoned twice to die

in “the lumiat,” missy creates an Elysium Field in order to survive being shot, and that destroys who the master was and allows a new version of them to survive, but again, the lumiat as a character feels false and disingenuous to who the master is----because, above all else, they are an amalgam of things. they’re not purely evil, though their choices tend to involve doing evil things

the master has dealt with intrusive thoughts all their lives, and in the “master” audio, crispy (who has been living as a human doctor) describes how he felt after delivering someone’s child: proud, and in awe, and yet part of him thought, ‘destroy the child; just go ahead and harm it,’ but he didn’t. he chose to ignore that wicked little voice, and in fact was shocked by it.

back to missy and the lumiat and the master: missy died alone, without hope, without witness, without reward----all of her work, spending 70 years in the Vault----and the doctor leaves her there. of course, it’s doubtful he knew, but when the mistress wakes up alone, whether or not they remember exactly what happened due to the paradox, they’re hurt, and angry, and when they somehow get off that ship and have time to reflect on who they are and what happened....

and then dhawan finds out about the child, and how everything he thought he knew about himself is false, and the doctor is part of him----that burning anger was born partially out of simm and partially out of missy, and it makes sense when it comes to who the master is-----but the lumiat doesn’t fit into that picture!

the master can survive without completely destroying who they were!!!

and i love the concept of the lumiat---of the master having a valeyard equivalent----but the way i read her is incredibly canon divergent; she doesn’t come in-between, but is old and tired, and she’s choosing to live for the betterment of the universe instead of destroying it to----she isn’t just everything sweet and nice!

i already made a post about how she’s worried that people will find her out, and living with that anxiety is something i’d love to explore more. just like how missy chose ‘missy’ to put a bit of distance between herself & the identity of ‘the master,’ the lumiat chose her name partly to put distance herself and who she was before! she’s dishonest from the get-go! and!!! that’s a far more interesting narrative!!!

to conclude with: a version of the master who has burned gallifrey, who felt so low that they begged the doctor to kill them..... that pain and anger could not come from something “purely good”! 

[chokemeanakin]

Anakin Skywalker x Sick gn Reader Being a Dipshit

Summary: Reader has a cold and Anakin takes care of her despite the fact that she literally goes looking for trouble

masterlist

Read it on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24711994

You’ve never truly hated yourself until this moment. 

You’re a capable individual, you know this. Living in the Jedi’s world during an intergalactic war was no easy ride, and you’d come to adapt to their hectic way of life. Through trials and tribulations, no matter how dangerous, exhausting, or mentally scarring, you’d always managed to come out on top.

Except for now.

When you needed yourself the most, you really let yourself down. 

Colossal screwup, you cursed yourself as your sweaty hand slid off the top of the pill bottle once again. Your fingers were red and rubbed raw from the indents on the lid. Useless idiot.

The strain from trying to pry the lid off the pill bottle made your sinuses clog up and your headache worsen. You squinted your eyes, shielding them from the harsh fluorescent lights as you sat in the corner of the bathroom and struggled. 

For some reason, you had thought joining the Jedi on their quest to destroy the separatists and restore peace to the galaxy would come with a ‘never get sick’ card. You never saw Yoda take a day off for the sniffles. 

Alas; here you were, curled up in a ball on the bathroom floor, wrestling with a child-proof pill bottle. Anakin was just outside, probably listening to your failing attempt to self-medicate. You promised him you’d be back in a second, but it’s been more like 5 minutes and you were sure he’d barge in at any moment now.

“Y/n?” speak of the devil. “You okay in there?”

“Fine,” you grit your teeth, tugging on the top once again. The directions said pull up and twist. That’s what you were doing, so why wasn’t it working?

“You need help with anything?”

You narrowed your eyes at his tone. He was holding back laughter. 

“No.”

“If you say so…”

You had about 20 seconds before he used his weird Jedi tricks to sneak his way past the locked door and find you in your pathetic predicament. Desperately, you attacked the lid-- twisting and turning, pushing and pulling. You balled up your shirt and used it for more grip, to no avail. Finally, as a last resort, you grabbed for the scissors you kept in the drawer under the sink. You raised it over your head and were just about to stab the bottle open with the blade when the door to the bathroom suddenly opened, and Anakin was catching your wrist in his hand. He gently took the scissors out of your grip, setting them on the counter out of reach.

“What did I tell you about playing with sharp objects while sick?”

You scrunched your face up, half-glaring at him and half wallowing in your own miserable embarrassment. You had hoped you could at least take some painkillers by yourself, to prove to Anakin that you weren’t some helpless little fawn while you were feeling under the weather, but of course the child safety measures had other plans. 

Anakin took the pill bottle from your stinging hands and twisted it open with ease. He shook a couple tablets out onto your waiting palm and then capped the bottle, setting it aside.

“See?” he handed a glass of water to you with a smirk. “Not so hard.”

“Can it, Skywalker,” you threw the pills back and sipped the water. The cold liquid soothed your aching throat. “I may be sick, but I can still kick your ass to Tatooine and back.”

“I’ll hold you to that, when you’re better I mean,” he took the empty glass from your grasp and set it back on the counter. Without skipping a beat, he bent down to wrap an arm under your shoulders, helping you to your feet. 

“Geez Ani, I’m sick, not crippled,” you groaned, sniffling as he led you back to bed. You ended up tripping on your discarded boot, and would have fallen flat on your face if he wasn’t holding you. He had the decency not to mention it. 

He brought you to your bed, helping you lay back against the pillows. You watched his face contort in concentration-- eyebrows furrowed, lips pursed, eyes narrowed-- as he focused on pulling the blankets up over you, smoothing down the edges, adjusting your pillows, trailing his fingers down the side of your face in between. You couldn’t help the blush on your cheeks as he held your chin delicately in his gloved hand, leaning down to place a soft, lingering kiss on your forehead. 

“You can always ask me for help you know.”

“I know,” you shrunk deeper under the covers, feeling squeamish under the intensity of his gaze.

“Is your throat still bothering you?”

You nodded, averting your eyes as you suddenly became bashful. It wasn’t just that you hated admitting to weakness-- it was also the fact that Anakin was so damn pretty, even up close, and he was fully using it against you. The boy had some wicked eye contact, and every time those dark blue eyes locked on you, you felt like melting. 

Anakin caressed your cheek with his thumb, no doubt noting the heat that pooled there. The corner of his mouth tilted up in a slight smile-- he knew what he was doing to you.

“I’ll go make you some tea.”

As soon as he left the room, you let out a long breath. It was meant to relieve some tension built up in your chest, but it really resulted in you hunched over in a coughing fit. You pressed your arm against your mouth, trying to muffle the awful barking sounds coming from your throat. Each cough felt like nails were dragging against the walls of your throat. Your forehead broke out in a sweat with the exertion, and the headache came back with a splitting furiosity.

Screw this, you decided, throwing off the covers and standing from the bed. Fresh air was just what your ailing body needed. 

You wobbled over to the balcony doors on weak legs, feeling like you could just collapse at the knees at any moment. Climbing onto the concrete wall of the balcony, you folded your legs criss-cross and watched the city lights twinkle before you. There was a cool breeze tonight and it did wonders to soothe your fever. This was possibly the best decision you had made since falling ill.

However, looking below you, there was at least a thousand feet between you and the ground. And no barrier stopping you from falling. 

Oh well, you thought to yourself. It’s not like anyone’s gonna push me. 

You sat on the balcony for a while, closing your eyes and breathing in the cold night air as you waited for Anakin to come back with the tea. It was very peaceful, and even the honking of impatient drivers in late night traffic was like a lullaby to your ears. Soon, you found yourself drifting off to sleep, your head falling forward as you slipped into unconsciousness.

“Force, Y/n, what are you doing on the ledge like that?!” Anakin’s voice ripped you out of your sleep. You startled, gripping onto the edge of the concrete as you blinked your eyes open to the millions of tiny city lights before you. You turned to see Anakin rushing toward you, floating the mug of tea he was holding away with the force. 

He tried wrapping his arms around you, but you squirmed out of his grasp.

“You can’t touch me, Anakin, you’ll get sick,” you mumbled drowsily. You yawned and rubbed your eye with a fist as he sputtered something about how you didn’t care about that before.

“Just come away from the ledge, Y/n, it’s not safe up there!”

You rolled your eyes, pushing yourself to unsteady feet slowly. “You worry too much,” you told him, turning around to face the city and opening your arms out wide. “See? I’m perfectly alri-- ah-- ah-- aaahh choo!”

The sneeze took you by surprise, and you pitched forward with the force it used to expel from your body. Suddenly you were too far over the edge of the balcony, and for a moment of heart-stopping terror you were falling…

… Until familiar strong arms caught you around the waist and pulled you back to the floor of the balcony. 

“You are a pain in my ass,” Anakin hissed, ushering you inside. He closed the doors to the balcony a little too hard with the force, holding you tightly all the way back to bed.

“Damn,” you croaked, letting him drop you back into bed and tuck the sheets even tighter around you, like a straightjacket that’ll stop you from escaping again. “I almost just died.”

“You wouldn’t have died,” Anakin huffed, turning his back to retrieve the tea he left on the dresser. “I wouldn’t let that happen. I, however, just had a mini heart attack.”

“Just a mini one?”

“Stop talking, you’ll only hurt your throat more.” The panic was slowly leaving his eyes as he sat on the edge of the bed. To calm you down or himself, you weren’t sure, but he began brushing your bangs out of your face as you sipped on the tea. 

You closed your eyes and let yourself melt into his touch, the soft tickling sensation of his hand grazing your forehead, the warm presence of him. You sniffled lightly, rubbing at your dripping yet somehow stuffed nose with your sleeve, hoping he would never stop carding his fingers through your hair. 

“You should rest,” Anakin took the mug from you after a moment and set it aside. He waved his gloved hand, and the lights in the room darkened so that the only thing casting light was the single candle burning on the bedside table. It flickered in the dark, casting shadows over Anakin’s face. 

Suddenly you felt his hand leave your face and his weight lift off the bed. Your heart dropped with the realization that he was leaving. Desperately, you reached for him before he could go too far, latching onto the hard metal of his gloved wrist.

“You can stay,” you told him quietly. Then you added, “Please.”

Anakin tilted his head thoughtfully, staring at you for a moment. You were glad it was dark so that he couldn’t see the colorful emotion staining your cheeks. It’s not like you two hadn’t slept in the same bed together-- you were dating, after all-- but showing affection never came easy to you. Neither did asking for help, or admitting weakness.

Anakin, to his credit, didn’t hesitate for very long. Gently, he got back into bed with you, this time snaking his arm under your head so that it would rest on the soft cushion of his bicep. You turned and curled into his chest, breathing in his scent. He always smelled like leather and metal and spices. Your favorite scent in the whole world.

“How are you feeling now?” Anakin murmured as he rubbed your arm soothingly, cocooning you against his body in his own.

“Like shit,” you admitted truthfully, but burrowed your head deeper into his chest. “But this is nice.”

“I’m glad,” you could hear the smile in his voice. 

You loved his voice. Just like his smell, his voice was one of your favorite sounds in the world, coming second only to his laugh. You wanted to keep talking, to keep hearing it, but you found yourself being weighed down with a heavy exhaustion. The warmth coming from the blankets and emanating from Anakin was enough to cloud your mind with sleep, the steady drag of his hand against your arm a soothing distraction from the miserable sickness waging war inside your body. Before you could say another word to the love of your life, you passed out right in his arms.

[lawrising-a]

📝 i'm late to the party but one for nikki pls,,,,,,,,,

( @madetrouble )

. november 23 .

‘ do you wish to know a well kept secret only known by a hotel writing pad? why there's tiny clips of papers massacred around the room? the answer is simple ; it's the fact that i've been writing about my survival partner. whenever bright pink makes my vision swim and my fingers twitch with the urge to let it out. frustrations, bold opinions ... regrets. the reason there are holes in fragile papers is because my grip on the pen cannot loosen. i get too violent with my motions. jerky, overtly emotional. now i find myself rambling on the back of a magazine, hoping to calm my bundling nerves before i try this again. this is the last available thing to write on in my nighted hotel room ---- unless i resort to the skin of my arms, of course. it's too desperate, though the former troublemaker always tended to bring out a stranger in me. ’

‘ when i briefly brought up my woes to jael days prior, she recommended organizing my thoughts by using my hands. a silly thing that felt more like a jest than someone looking out for my strained connection ; though i resorted to it nonetheless. my brain scatters about, fleeting feelings disappearing the moment i try to take my pen to them. would this bode better if i pretended this was a letter to send her? logistically, that adds up better than the initial plan which was writing aimlessly. so i wish to try and adapt this new direction moving forward ... ’

‘ ... ’

‘ i never said i don't like you : are words that were once spoken to you, nikita, before. with a terseness to my tone, forever testy whenever i acknowledged your presence. and i did do mean it. that statement stands strongly today like our bodies do. unwavering despite everything thrown at us, even with the unending outside forces snipping our bond to loose ends. never have i disliked you. at least not in a way that i believe would be genuine distaste. sometimes you push all the right buttons to light something dangerous in me ; molding me into something i am not. you make me angry, spiteful, teeth aching for revenge. there was a time where i believed that was all your doing, actually. twisting my perception into wicked tainted nothings to fuel a point left unseen by our corpse filled audience ... never say i don't learn, however. it's come to my attention that i have always been that person. easy to rile up. eager to sniff out mistakes so i look holier in comparison. is it so wrong to need to be needed more than your peers? to be the better option, so you're the first choice? considering how our relationship's turned out, i'll take that as a yes. ’

‘ admitting things to your face is hard, you know? sharp dolled up eyes pierce right through me. you look me over with unkindness, like you're waiting for a shred of weakness to expose. you scare me, nikita. you'd hurt me if it meant your survival ; some of your words and choices have scarred me for life thunder makes me think of manny, of the rounds you put in his chest. i watched that. never took my eyes off him for a second unlike you and joey but what makes the shivers race down my spine is knowing there's some of me trapped in you. there's no comfort with knowing i would've done the same things you had. i wish there was, but looking at you is like looking in the funhouse mirrors. you're so easy to demonize. to write off as the worst parts of me. naively pretending that is all you are. it's why i think things so achingly tender that is only reserved for this, between me and something to write on. if you knew, you'd be a shark : eager to work more blood out of me when you see it pool around my limp body. i can't let that happen. ever. ’

‘ despite my ill toned words and critiques, i do want to say. to say nikita, i don't blame you. not for roi's death, not for colleen's, and not for safiya's. i don't harbor any blame even as you ripped the people who loved me away. sometimes i think i can. i think about manny and safiya especially, eager to use them against you once your hackles raise ... but it veils the tiredness within. there is no blame here. we've both done awful things to survive. what makes me hesitate with you is the fact none of the awful feelings have faded yet. there's been times where all i wanted to do was imprint upon you, nestle deep into your sturdy side ; slipping my hand around your neck and cupping you tenderly there. i held you like that before, remember? although the sting of our bond makes me think otherwise, as well as all the things we've snarled to each other in the past. is that kind of affection for people with tethers like us? i doubt it. but please know i wish differently ... and that, through it all, there is a part of me that respects you. admires your beauty and courage, naturally drawn to taking shelter in it at the worst of times. you're the flood and the lighthouse. god, i get so painfully poetic at times that never matter. ’

‘ space runs thin on this magazine, thus bringing the curtain to a close. there is so much more i tell you in my dreams. more words weighing my tongue down like iron. they all forever pale when worded so needlessly complex, perhaps even totally lost on you. which brings me to my dry words. no poetry weaves in-between these next lines. they must be heard and understood ---- no more implying things. ’

‘ i love care about you. you scare me with your strengths. inspire something crueler in me something that helped me survive and i think of you often. to be blunt, i think about if you're okay. wonder what manny saw in you. think what ifs that you'd probably feel weird about. do you think about everlock as much as me? will you accompany me to literal hell and back for lost, beloved souls? did you want me to back? ’

‘ yet, i think, the million dollar question is ... ’

‘ do you write about me too? ’

[dramaddict-and-proud-of-it]

The Untamed

Year : 2019 | Country : CN | Nb of episodes: 50

My rate: 10/10

Synopsis :

In a land dominated by the mighty Wen clan, a young man named Wei Wu Xian (Xiao Zhan) strikes up an unconventional friendship with justice-loving Lan Wang Ji (Wang Yibo).

When the duo unexpectedly stumbles across evidence implicating the Wen clan’s chief in a plot to bring mayhem to the inhabitants of their land, Wei Wu Xian and Lan Wang Ji decide to intervene.

However, the pair’s attempts to foil the Wen clan boss’s wicked plans go wrong. In the confusion that follows, Wei Wu Xian disappears – with many fearing the worst for him.

Sixteen years later, Wei Wu Xian returns out of the blue. He is soon reunited with Lan Wang Ji, just as a spate of mysterious murders has broken out. The duo joins forces once more to investigate, determined not to fail this time…

Can the pair get to the bottom of the intrigue? Will they solve the murder cases? And just who is the dastardly secret figure pulling the strings behind the evildoings now blighting the land?

 Main cast :

Xiao Zhan as Wei Ying/Wei Wuxian

Wang Yi Bo as Lan Zhan/Lan Wangji

Zoey Meng as Wen Qing

Lulu Xuan as Jiang Yuan Li

Marius Wang as Jiang Cheng

Paul Yu as Wen Ning

Liu Hai Kuan as Lan XiChen

Zhu Zan Jin as Meng Yao

Wang Hao Xuan as Xue Yang

Ji Li as Nie Huai Sang

Qi Pei Xin as Jin Ling

Zheng Fan Xing as Lan Si Zhui

My thoughts on this drama :

Okay.Usually, I am not one to watch a drama based on its popularity and fan reviews only. The synopsis must seduce me too. This one might just be the exception. Every time I went on forums, and Viki and Netflix too, they all talked to me about a drama called The Untamed. Okay, the name already sounds badass, I like. But then I read a bit more the reviews and I stopped a minute. Is the reason it's so popular just because it's adapted from a book with gay romance in it? That kind of gave me the coldest shower. So for a moment I doubted... is it really that good or is it just the trend of the 21st century at it again? Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against boys or girls being together, to each his own, but any form of romantic passion on screen is kind of repulsive to me. So I hesitated. But then, Netflix put it in front of me again, and I clicked. It was 5 days agao. I finished the 50th episode 20 minutes ago. I hadn't been taken by a drama for quite a long time. So yes, I bow down, this is a masterpiece. It's all in the subtelty. It's all in the music. In the sceneries. In the story. Halfway through episode 2 I was already obsessed. How can a drama be that good? What sort of magic is that? Setting aside some weird CGI (but arent we used to it), everything was perfect. And what is even more impressive, most of the main actors are pretty young, or not even "actors", especially our two main leads. I'm still not over the fact that they sung the OST, how can rappers be that good at singing and acting too, while being that pretty? Unfair. I feel like I'm completely ranting there. This must be the only drama in the past 2 years in which I didn't press the fast forward button more than twice... I've completely have fallen for our main duo. They are beautiful souls, too pure for this world, and must be protected at all cost. I'm also obsessed with the OST, because wow, it's on point. Some of it even reached my Forever playlist. On a final note because this is long enough (though I could say so much more but no spoiler allowed means I must keep quiet), I recognize that its fame is more than deserved, and that any who hasn't seen it yet should just stop whatever he/she's watching and start, like Right. Now. Enjoy !!!

 A Favorite ?

YES

[yanderedbdimagines]

Okay this is a bizarre one but I curious. But how will the Doctor, Wraith and Hillbilly behave towards a survivor they have a crush on but who also happens to have a baby. (Like maybe they had them in the realm and lets say for no added complication that they are a single parents with no SO waiting for them)

—————–—————-

Oooffff this is a unique request xD But I’m very curious now myself.

I had to scratch my head for a bit with the baby though. Maybe it’s because I’m dense, but I might have misinterpreted the question since I have written it differently than what you might have meant. It’s something I got slapped in the face with when I was halfway through my writing.

Long story short, I accidentally thought you meant that the Entity pretty much dropped the baby at the main campfire knowing that you would be the only survivor willing enough to run some more trials in order to secure the wellbeing of the child.

I hope it’s still alright, and if not, I hope to hear what you actually meant so that I can edit this post.

———————————–

The Doctor

He has extensive documentation about child psychology and development stored somewhere within his office, so he’s knowledgeable enough to be able to offer up his services to you as an excellent infant psychiatrist and as a sub-par pediatrician. Pity for him, seen his reputation, it’s nearly impossible for him to confront you with this proposal since you wouldn’t exactly come near him willingly(for obvious reasons).

Instead, he’d have to call upon the Entity to make it so, in exchange for an increased quantity in trials he’d need to follow himself.

You’ll be very scared, freaked out and even a bit awkward and annoyed to actually be brought to him at the memorial institute with the baby wrapped tightly in your arms and with barely any choice to the matter.

But you’ll get to see a different side of him which you didn’t know he possessed. His facial contraptions are gone, his voice is much deeper than usual and the glow in his eyes has degraded. His usual attire has also been replaced by a clean suit which conceals the tampered skin from your curious gaze. To you, he’s direct and professional. Kind even… A whole different man than who you’ve gotten to know him as during the trials.

Underneath his care and your watchful eye, the baby’s health will thrive; mentally as physically.

However, don’t be fooled. This man is very deranged in his own unique fashion. He’s unbelievably smart; no doubt about that. But he’s lost most of his moral and ethical mindset somewhere within his life. To him, an ordinary human life has become nothing more but a simple tool for a much higher purpose. A purpose where no expense is too high and no risk is too great. In some regard, the child plays a similar role in an objective quite different, if you know what I mean.

If you’re smart enough, I’d recommend keeping the child away from him for as much as you can. Especially once they’ve reached adulthood, for they might end up as one of his many victims if you’d turn your back for a bit too long… He does so for reasons which most people might actually be surprised by…  

 The Hillbilly

Surprisingly aloof. Don’t misunderstand him on this one; he’ll be unbelievably jealous and he will even be a little bit repelled by the baby because he/she receives the exact type of attention that he has always craved and genuinely needed from his parents during his own childhood. Deep, deep down, he even still wishes that the Entity hasn’t ever given you that little bundle of drooling flesh and bone. He did so even more when he found out that you ran more trials than the average survivor in order to secure the baby’s well-being to the best of your abilities. A child who doesn’t even carry your blood…

Still, he’s sharp and sane enough to know that trying to separate you from the baby is the worst thing he could possibly do to you. You’d break, and will see him as the monster his own family has always perceived him as if you’d somehow find out that he’d be the culprit behind such an action.    

Instead, he will have to force himself to adapt and to learn to accept the child’s lingering presence if he’d ever hope to be at the receiving end of your tender love and affection. Although, he might never develop a soft spot for the little one at all, no matter how important they are to you. Even if you’d end up in a romantic relationship with the disfigured man will that aspect stay the same.

He simply can’t…

 The Wraith

A baby? In a realm as vile and wicked as this one? The Wraith has lost a great deal of his humanity, but he’s still human enough to feel at least a shred of sympathy towards the infant for his/her inescapable future. At least, if the Entity’s as scummy as the Wraith currently believes it to be. He doubts the parasitic being would let the child go once they come of age; their fate sealed to become a survivor instead, no matter what their origin is.

As a selfish plus side, this might be the right moment for him to support you from the sidelines and to show you that he won’t ever pose as a threat to you nor the baby. He’ll leave beneficial flowers and medical herbs at the border of the survivor camp’s clearing and he will let you escape from his trials whenever he can, for example. After a time, whether you’d end up reciprocating his love or not, he might even attain a liking towards the baby as well depending on how their personal identity develops.

The Entity will be very displeased, but there’s only so much it can do towards a killer who is brainwashed by an unnatural form of love.

No amount of torture can ever force such a thing out of the Wraith now…

[mo-mo-and-porkchop]

Umbrella academy fiction

Chapter 4 (Chapter 3 here)

Canon and OC; Deigo x OC, Klaus x OC platonic

*as always I do not own any part of the canon characters or show. I am merely writing my own adaptation to the storyline. Nor do I own any gifs/gif credit.

**I do own all things related to the OCs and additional story elements. And apologies, I couldn't find any "young" gifs of them, but they are all meant to be young adults to show age in this fic.

Tagging: @imcrowley , @wicked-bitch-of-the-west , @lonewolf471

As the weeks passed, Diego and Klaus took turns bringing Phoebe her meals and sneaking her throughout the house for bathroom breaks - Five wanting no part in it, his silence enough help toward their cause.

"We can't keep doing this," Diego said stopping Klaus just outside the door to the attic.

"What? She has to eat," he responded with a shrug.

Diego sighed, irritated. "You know that's not what I meant. We can't keep...hiding her."

Klaus seemed to deflate.

"Sooner or later everyone is going to notice our trips here and how frequent they are. And what happens if someone else finds her? Hmm?"

Klaus remained silent. He looked sorrowfully at the door. He knew Diego was right. Hiding Em - sorry, Phoebe - was no better than the nunnery keeping her sheltered from society. He had wanted to free his friend, not imprison her.

"I don't know what else to do," he admitted to his brother. "I didn't really think past getting her out and here."

Diego sighed defeatedly. Of course Klaus wouldn't have a plan for this. He should have known better. He took the food from him and sternly told him...

"You better figure something out."

...before leaving his brother alone.

He slowly made his way up the stairs, muttering to himself - simultaneously figuring out what to say to her and rehearsing it. When he reached the top of the staircase he found Phoebe looking out her only window, a book clutched in her arms.

Light filtered through sheer curtains and softly lit her face. She looked almost angelic. His breath caught momentarily. A muffled voice sounded in his ears.

"Wh-what?" he stuttered.

"I said, what's on the menu today?" she repeated, ignoring the stutter. She left the window and headed toward him.

"Oh, uh," he stammered coming back to reality. "Hargreaves' specialty. PB&J," he said with a nervous laugh, handing it to her.

"Or as I like to call it the daily special," she countered jokingly.

She took the food with a quiet thanks and stood awkwardly with him. The tension between them grew to an almost overwhelming weight when Pheobe decided to break the silence.

"Everything okay?"

He looked at her confused.

"Usually when you're on food delivery you don't...stay this...long."

"Everything's fine," he lied.

She eyed him suspectingly.

"Everything's fine."

"Yea, you said that already."

Shit.

"Look I didn't want to be the one to -- Its just that -- "

All strategies for evicting her from the academy had gone out the window. "No wonder you never stay," she teased with a nervous smile and soft laugh.

Diego grit his teeth and cleared his throat. "Look," he said slightly harsh, her comment taken as offense to his speaking abilities. "You may not remember everything, but I do," he started angrily.

"Diego, I'm--" she tried apologizing.

"We," he continued, motioning between the two of them. She flinched slightly. "Are not friends."

Her eyes widened as they locked with his. He glared at her silently, his jaw clenching. The anger in his eyes frightened her. She inhaled sharply. "I--I don't--" she stammered.

"I think I may have a solution to our little problem," Klaus voice rang out through the attic as he appeared from the stairs.

Diego's brow furrowed and he held his state for a moment longer. Phoebe quickly wiped the tears that had been pooling in the corner of her eyes.

"And it's going to sound a little crazy, but just hear...me...out," he finished, pausing when he saw the two of them. Diego pushed past him and left.

"O...kay?" Klaus asked turning to Emily - no, Phoebe.

"Yea," she said a bit shakily. "Everything's fine."

She forced a smile to her face and sat down to eat. Klaus kept his eyes locked on her as he followed suit and sat across from her, well aware that she was lying. He was - is - her best friend. He could always tell.

"Good," he played along, falling back on the pile of pillows she called a bed. "Because I have some terrible news," he added with a sigh. He rolled his head to the side, his gaze finding hers. "Diego is an ass," he added with a smirk.

Phoebe let out a small chuckle and a half smile tugged at the corner of her lips.

"Yes he is," she agreed quietly.

Klaus could feel the sadness eminating from her as she stared at her sandwich. Before he could try and comfort her she broke the silence.

"I have news too," she finally admitted.

"Ooo. What? Tell me, tell me, tell me."

Klaus sat up, excited. Anything had to be better than revealing his plan to integrate her into their little family - telling Reginald himself of her presence. And her abilities. It had been what he wanted to talk to Diego about before he rushed off.

His excitement made her doubt her decision, but she had to push through. If the nuns had taught her anything it was that life was usually hard. At least when it came to the big stuff.

"I can't stay here anymore."

Klaus deflated. "Oh."

Her heart hurt when she saw his sadness. "It has nothing to do with you," shw said reaching out and wrapping her hand around his. Luckily it was covered otherwise she would have been in for the shock of her life - their previous encounters flooding her mind. "Or your asshole brother," she said with a soft smile. "I just, can't stay locked up anymore."

Klaus' smile returned. "That's the thing. You don't have to. I figured out how you can stay and be free," he said his excirment returning. He jumped up from his seat and pulled her up with him. "Come on. We'll do it right now," he said as he led her back to the steps. "There's no point in waiting to see if Diego approves."

"Approves of what?" Diego said, startling them when Klaus opened the door.

"Jesus Diego. You should really stop sneaking up on people like that. You almost gave me a heart attack," Klaus said, clutching his chest. "And nothing," he said waving off his brother and pushing past him. He pulled Emily to his side and link their arms together. "I'm just going to let dear old dad in on our little secret."

Emily glanced back at Diego who stood silently in shock. She caught the fear and concern in his eyes, her gaze only leaving him when they turned the corner. By the time he broke himself out of the trance and ran to stop them it was too late. The door to Reginald Hargreaves' office was shutting behind them.

[queerbutstillhere]

Hi, honey!! I'm back on Tumblr hohoiii 😆 If you still accept prompts can I ask you for: Damian and Jonno's children (a boy and a girl, God knows why😶) are sent to the past and met their daddys who are recently dating. ((Please, make it extremely awkward, some Batfam too)) tysm😙

(Once again, thank ya for giving me a chance to work with these kiddos! I hope you like this!!)

The portal dumped them out in the middle of the air. Because of course it did.

The two screaming kid vigilantes grabbed at each other as they plumpted through the air. Zaina willed her fluctuating powers to kick in, and sure enough, the adrenaline caused the surge and she snatched her brother out of the air, slowing their fall.

"Oof! You're heavy!" She exclaimed, scowling down at him.

"I am not!" The younger teen, built like a rugby player, said with a scowl.

"Yes you are!"

She looked around, flying to the nearby roof and touching down on it, she "gently" dropped her brother to the graveled roof of the tall building.

"Where are we?" Malik asked, popping up and looking around.

"Ummm."

He was already activating his lenses, which were glowing blue now. He looked around, turning a full circle.

"I think we're in Gotham," Zaina asked, walking to the edge and looking down.

"Really? Did he just teleport us away."

"... No, look."

Zaina pointed across the street to billboard on the side of a building, one that had Bruce Wayne, and something about Wayne Industries.

"Oh my God," Malik exclaimed. "Sis. I think we were sent back in time."

Zaina and Malik Wayne-Kent were the children of Damian Wayne and Jon Kent, they had been adopted at 5 and 3, respectively, and had lived with their parents for thirteen years now. Both were born Arabic, but had met Jon during a crisis in their Homeland, their mother having been killed in it, and Jon took very quick steps to make sure the kids were okay, and not long after, he and Damian decided to adopt them.

Zaina was eighteen now, and yet still shorter then her brother. She was only 5'5", and fairly muscular from having done gymnastics almost her whole life. Her black hair was cut short in a shoulder length bob, and she had darker skin like her father. She had, a few months ago, been exposed to platinum kryptonite, and had thus gained the powers of Superman. Only they were still on the fritz. It made her wince to remember the weeks when her hearing was changing, and when her eyes evolved. The good news was she didn't need glasses. Her father had wanted to take them away, but Zaina had begged and begged and made full persuasive essays and finally convinced him to allow her a trial period.

Malik was only sixteen and but he was tall, and broad in the shoulders. He played lacrosse and worked out and ran and all those things, and yes, he was in a rugby league. He was already a hottie at sixteen, and Zaina could not count the amount of girls she had chased away from her brother. His dark hair, more brown then black, was kept short, shaved on the sides and just a little bit of fluff on top. He had no powers, just his wicked sharp intellect and skills with technology.

They had both become teen vigilantes a few years back, having adopted adaptations of some of the previous heroes in their family line. Zaina had become Robin, with a bit of a twist on the uniform, it was more solid black, with splashed of color here and there, her boots, her belt, her cape, her gloves. So on. Soon she probably would switch to a Super title when her powers fully developed. Malik had made his own name, Batboy, until he felt he had earned the Batman title from his father. His costume was a lot like the Black Bat costume, and his cowl didn't completely cover his head, just came up his neck and around his eyes, his hair sticking out the top, and the classic bat ears poking up from the sides.

Their parents had both stepped down from their vigilante rolls for the most part while they were raising the kids, but when the siblings had started sneaking out, they decided to pick the rolls back up so they could properly train them, and watch their backs until they were ready to go out. It's doubtful they ever thought this would happen.....

Their game plan was simple. Find Batman or one of their uncles. Explain. Get taken back to the batcave, and then to the Watchtower so Waverider or someone can send them back to their time.

They split up after Malik resynced their comms, going to opposite ends of the town. Zaina was flying, scanning the streets, listening for the sounds of her family. And then, as it tends to do, her powers just gave out. She screamed as she started falling, scrambling for her grapple gun, which Malik wisely made her keep. And then she landed on something with a small thunk.

"Hey there, you better slow down a bit, shouldn't jump without a grapple in hand."

She recognized that voice. It was a bit younger, a bit more innocent and lively, but she recognized it all the same. She twisted in her savior's arms, looking up at Superboy.

"Pops!" She exclaimed joyfully, throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly.

She probably shouldn't have done that.

Jon chuckled nervously, keeping his hold on her.

"I think you have me mistaken for someone else..."

"Oh. . . No. It's a long story, we need to find ba- Robin, or errrrr....." She paused, considering how she should do this. "What year is it?"

"2019?"

"Okay. We need to find Robin."

".... Who are you?"

"I'm also Robin, but from the future."

Malik had similar luck. He had been poking around the narrows, secretly hoping to find Red Hood, when the screaming hit him. His sensors started going crazy seconds before he could hear it, and then he took off, running through the streets and weaving between cars and signs to reach the source.

He burst around the corner and found a full on gang street fight going down, a couple kids stuck in the middle.

"Hey!" He yelled, his voice projected slightly by his tech.

A couple people paused and turned to him. He grabbed his Bo staff, fully expanding it and hitting a button to send electrical currents through it.

"Back away from the kids."

One of them scoffed, stepping forwards.

"It's one of them batkids. Soak 'em, boys."

Malik easily knocked out the first two, flipping off the third to get back out of range of their bats and knuckles.

"Oh ho! He thinks he's hot shit!"

More thugs rushed at him, but Malik was used to this, he easily beat them all down. Until one got behind him, arms wrapping around his upper arms and squeezing. Another grabbed his Bo at the insulated section, preventing him from hitting anyone.

Then there was a thump and the person behind him let go. Malik reared forwards, headbutting the person in front of him. He judo flipped them quickly before turning back to find the kids. They were huddled against the wall. He took a running start and flipped over some thugs, ducking past others until he was at the kids. There were three total, two younger ones, and a teen, not much younger then him.

"Hi," he said with a smile, smacking another thug with his bo. "I'm going to get you children out of here okay?"

They nodded rapidly. Malik considered his options and then looked at the oldest.

"I need you to carry the smaller one."

She nodded, quickly getting him on her back piggyback style. Malik picked up the other kid the same way. Then he produced his grapple and aimed for the roof. Once it was hooked, he put away his baton, and grabbed the girl with his free arm. They quickly were yanked up and swung over the crowd of gang members to the end of the Street, where it was clear and safe. His shoulder complained greatly, but it was fine.

When he landed, set down the kids and turned around, everyone was gone. Except a vigilante. Robin. His baba.

He recognized his father instantly, having seen enough pictures to know, even with the significant difference.

"Oh thank God."

Robin eyed him warily.

"Who are you."

"I think we best wait for-"

His sensors beeped in annoyance at the detection of two Kryptonian's. He turned and found his sister and a much younger version of his pops landing, Zaina on Jon's back.

"Sis! Are you okay?!" He exclaimed, ditching Damian to run to her. She jumped off and ran over, meeting him and grabbing his face, scanning him over.

"I'm fine! I heard all the fighting!"

"I'm okay, did your powers give out again?"

"Yes! I was up four stories and they dropped and-"

"I told you not to get that high!" Malik protested.

"Hey! Don't lecture me!" Zaina glanced to the side and froze. "You found Baba?"

"Yeah."

"Are we going to tell them?"

"What else do you have in mind?"

"Doesn't that break time travel rules?"

Malik gave his sister an annoyed face.

"No- God, that's not- no, Z, no."

"Excuse me. We have questions," Jon said, stepping up.

"Police are almost here," Malik shot back, the lenses of his mask slightly blue. "We'll talk after."

After they cleared things up with the police, they headed to the batcave, and Malik immediately felt more relaxed in the familiar, yet older interior. He didn't hesitate to pull his mask off, looking around, noting the differences.

"Robin what is this?"

He glanced over to see Batman and immediately went still.

Bruce had died with they were young, they had barely gotten to know him, and Malik especially had very few memories of him... Zaina, on the other hand, gave a sob like noise and smacked her hand over her mouth. Everyone looked at her, confused.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, composing herself. She too reached up and took her mask off.

"You would like an explanation?" Malik questioned, even as he tapped at the screen attached into his glove.

"We would," Damian responded, eyeing him warily.

"I'm Malik Wayne-Kent, this is my sister, Zaina Wayne-Kent, and we're from the future."

Silence hung over the cave after his words and Damian looked thoroughly shocked.

"I'm sorry," Jon said, speaking up. "Did you say, Wayne-Kent?"

"Yes."

Damian opened his mouth, shut it once, and then spoke. "Please tell me you are Drake's children?"

"Afraid not," Zaina said with a head shake. "You're our baba."

There was another several beats of silence, and then Bruce seemed to put two and two together.

"And your other parent is..... Jon?"

Malik nodded. "Pops."

"Which makes me your grandfather."

Another nod from Zaina.

"You're kidding me. If you're joking right now I'll-" Damian clenched his jaw and looked up at Jon.

"Wait, are you two.... What half of 2019 is this?" Malik asked. "Have you not started dating yet?"

Bruce opened his mouth, looking at his son, and then back at his future grandchildren.

"Oh, dear," Zaina said softly, leaning into her brother. "I don't think they have."

"Oops."

"Wait so you're telling me we get married?!" Jon exclaimed, shocked.

"Uh, well in our timeline you do. When we got spit out here, we created a separate time line from ours."

"And. She . . . She has powers," Jon said, pointing at Zaina.

"I was given them by Platinum kryptonite," Zaina explained. "You wanted to take them away, baba, but I managed to convince you otherwise."

"Sounds like something you'd do," Jon said, nudging Damian.

"Shush, Jon, this is important. We have to get them back to their timeline before we change anything else accidentally."

Bruce was sitting there in silence and then he looked to his son.

"Damian. Are you two dating?"

Damian winced slightly. "Just a few weeks ago...."

"... Okay. I'm going to go prep the jet. We'll head to the watchtower."

The four watched him walk away. Then Zaina looked at Damian.

"It's really odd seeing you guys do young," she said, smiling lightly.

"I imagine so... We really let you two be vigilantes?"

"You didn't really have a choice. I hacked into the cave and then we snuck out every night until you decided to just train us."

Damian and Jon didn't quite know what to do with their children, just kinda awkwardly looked at them.

Malik finally turned and walked away, over to the dino. "Man, this thing is so old."

"Okay, you young pup," Zaina said with a laugh, following after.

"So whose all what in this time line?" Zaina asked, looking over to Damian and Jon, who were whispering softly.

"Pardon?" Damian asked in a cold tone she wasn't used too.

"Uncle Dickie, he's.... Nightwing?"

Jon nodded, his arm was around Damian now.

"Dick's Nightwing, Jason is Red Hood. Cass is Black Bat, Barbara is Batgirl slash Oracle, Steph is Spoiler, and Tim is .... Drake," their pops explained. "Obviously we're Superboy and Robin, and Bruce is Batman."

"Bruce is dead in your timeline isn't he?" Damian asked, walking away from Jon and torwards them.

They exchanged a look, and then Malik nodded.

"There was an accident.... No one could stop it. I'm sorry," he said softly.

Damian shook his head, gently hugging Malik.

"No. I'm sorry. How old were you?"

"I was only five, Zaina was eight."

"I remember him more then Malik," Zaina offered, looking sad now.

Malik, hugging his baba back, looked up to Jon, who looked contemplative.

"But, again, we accidentally changed your time line, so that may not happen. Just like you two may not get married, and you may not adopt us."

"... As far as I'm concerned those seem like fixed points in time," Jon said.

Damian sighed and pulled back, giving Jon a look, and then he hugged Zaina.

"Who am I? In your time?"

"First and foremost your our dad," she answered. "But you're also a businessman and Batman. Once Malik is old enough, you're going to give him Batman."

Damian nodded as he considered this, but went silent, stepping back to stand next to Jon.

They had a very awkward flight to the Watchtower, Zaina and Jon quietly chatting about their powers, and what Zaina had developed so far. Malik sat next to Damian, silently working on his tech, as always. He was obsessive about keeping it updated, always changing the programing. Some of his features didn't work due to the lack of connection to the Wayne Satellites of the future, but enough of them did that he could still preform scans, bouncing off nearby cell phone towers.

"What's that?" Damian asked, watching him tap at the screen on his forearm.

"It's my control panel."

"For what?"

"My OTL."

"What."

"It's. . . Optical lenses in my mask, look."

Malik held it up, flicked on the blue lenses and then turned, looking at Zaina. On his screen, a digital display of a file popped up.

"I can also do this."

He triple tapped it and it was projected up into a hologram.

"Oh."

Zaina leaned forwards, arms on her brothers shoulders. "Malik's a genius. He programs all his tech himself. Even uncle Tim and Aunt Babs can't keep up with him."

Malik flushed, looking down. "I just like programming."

"You'd never guess it, from his public appearance, but he'd a major nerd. Jock Nerd type."

"Okay Prep Jock, shut your mouth."

Zaina giggled.

"So, what are you two's vigilante names?" Bruce asked from the cockpit.

"I'm Robin," Zaina answered, looking up to her grandfather. "But pops and I have agreed once my powers and are more consistent, I'm going to take up another name, Supergirl or something."

"And I'm Batboy, for now."

Bruce nodded slightly.

"I know you guys have a lot of questions, but I am afraid we won't be able to answer some of them," Malik said. "There's somethings I don't dare mess with, timeline wise."

"We understand," Bruce answered. "this isn't our first time messing with time travel."

The rest of the flight was awkward silence. They got to the watchtower and confused everyone they talked to.

"Where's Waverider?" Bruce asked J'onn, who was on duty at that moment.

"He has not been around for several-"

There was a burst of sparks and then suddenly Waverider appeared in front of them. He gave Malik and Zaina a startled look. They waved.

"You two are much bigger," he remarked.

"Well, that's what happens when you aren't hoping around the time stream," Zaina said with a grin.

"Your father's are probably waiting for you," he said, walking over to them. "Let's go."

"Wait!" Zaina backed away, and then spun to Bruce. "I know you don't know me. But... Can I just give you a hug?"

Bruce chuckled and nodded, opening his arms. "Come here."

She ran over, crashing into his body, hugging him tightly. Bruce gently hugged her, rubbing her back.

"It's okay, I don't know what happens, but I understand," Bruce said softly, kissing her head.

"I love you, grandpa," she murmured softly.

"And I can not wait to meet you again, little one."

Zaina pulled away, reaching up and adjusting her mask. Bruce looked to Malik and held open his arms. Malik immediately gave in and ran over, hugging him. They exchanged no words, just hugged. And then Malik stepped back, and Waverider grabbed onto both of them.

"Goodbye, and thank you," Zaina said to the younger versions of their fathers.

"Bye! Be safe!" Jon said with a grin.

And then they were gone.

They appeared back in their time, right in front of their fathers at the batcave. Damian jolted slightly, and then raised an eyebrow.

"Waverider?"

"Hey, Damian. Jon."

"What's up?" Jon asked, setting down his cup of tea.

"Oh, not much, found your kids in 2019. Figured you might like them back."

"Indeed we would."

"Well, see you around."

Waverider disappeared again. Malik sighed and pulled off his mask, walking forwards and hugging his baba.

"It's been a weird day, and I'm ready for bed. Good night baba, good night pops. I love you," Malik said, heading towards the locker room.

"Love you too, kiddo," Jon called after him.

They looked at Zaina. "So what happened?"

"I'll explain over some hot cocoa and smores."

[notyetneedcoffee]

Soul Seer, Pt. 3

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: None this Chapter, but later

Author’s Note: Takes place right after Avengers 1, with time travel elements and hints of Infinity Wars. Does NOT follow cannon after Avengers.

* * *

Banner and Stark popped up from behind the server banks like a pair of meerkats when the door opened. Steve Rogers entered the room, a stern expression already locked on his face. Stark leaned casually on the wall, cleaning his immaculate nails with the screwdriver in his hand. “Hey Cap, you come to let us know that it’s dinner time, ‘cause you didn’t need to bother. My stomach is getting louder than when big green wants to redecorate.”

“No.” Steve fought to not roll his eyes. “Tell me you’re not doing what I’ve been told you’re doing.”

“Okay.” Tony shrugged. “We’re not.”

“Tony.”

“What?”

“Are you hijacking the SHIELD surveillance on Loki?” Steve frowned.

“Hacking.” Stark corrected. “It’s hacking. And it’s not about Loki, it’s about (Y/N). Having Reindeer Games rattling around in her head has got to be tough enough, I’m not going to hand her over to SHIELD on a silver platter, too.”

“What do you mean?” Steve took in the concerned look on both their faces.

“Now that they know she has this ability, and that she’s got all that knowledge from Loki in her mind,” Banner interjected. “You don’t think SHIELD would use any means necessary to assure her participation.”

“Like, say using footage of her crying and breaking down – a totally normal reaction when you’ve had a GOD shoved in your brain – to prove that you’re unstable and should be committed against your will.” Tony spat.

“You know it’s not beyond them.” Bruce sighed.

“So, you’re just going to turn the camera’s off?” Cap crossed his arms. Not liking the idea, but understanding the dilemma.  

“We’re going to fake it.” Stark shrugged. “Jarvis has been recording them for the last several hours. He’s created innocuous scenarios of them in discussions, reading, so on, to replace anything that needs to be replaced.”

“Currently, we have created a time delay of three minutes by stretching out the records by a few seconds at a time. That way we can still monitor what’s going on, but what goes on to the SHIELD monitors is controlled.” Bruce finished.

“And you’re confident this will work.” Steve asked, leaning against the desk. “They won’t be able to tell?”

“They’d have to beat Jarvis’ programming and they can’t.” Stark confirmed. “So, you going to rat on us, Cap?”

“No.” He sighed. “I’ll take a turn monitoring. This needs to stay as quite as possible. How are you going to let (Y/N) know?”

“That’s where Thor comes in.”

* * * * * 

Loki sat across the room, sipping on a cup of tea and holding yet another book. He spent more time watching your sleeping form out of the corner of his eye than reading, but those who watched would never know. Even though he placed you in the Dreamless Sleep, the urge to guard over you possessed him.

It took conscious effort to maintain the mask of passive indifference. How was he to mitigate the risk of someone, a mortal no less, knowing his inner most thoughts and memories? He looked at you, internally smirking at the irony that the very reason he felt the urge to protect you was the same reason he would normally kill you.  

A Midgardian mortal.  The Norns must be laughing their asses off.

Still, Loki admitted to himself, your ability to adapt impressed him. Your grasp of the situation, and the danger, impressed him as well. When you asked to be put back to sleep, he knew it was not physical fatigue you sought to remedy. Your walls were crumbling.  

The door opened. Loki did not hide the deep frown.

Thor’s bulk filled the doorway. He approached his brother cautiously, noting your sleeping figure on the bed, as he held out a book. “Brother. I’ve brought you something from home.”

“Your home, not mine.” Loki sneered, yet he snatched the book out of his hand.  

“I have spoken with Father about the information you shared here.” Thor sat across from Loki.  

“And?” Loki outwardly looked disinterested, but he knew the information would greatly impact his fate. Thor did not immediately answer. When Loki flipped open the book to avoid looking at his brother, he understood why. A new inscription had been written on the inside of his favorite tome.  

Written in Thor’s sloppy Vanir. “The iron one has diverted the eyes of the shield so the little one may cry without fear. Your secrets and hers will remain safe from now till two days hence.”

Loki looked up. “What does Odin say?”

“He was,” Thor sighed, “unmoved. However, Mother convinced him to reflect for a night before making any decision.”  

“She wishes to make her opinion known.”

“Mother is...” Thor shrugged.

“A force.” Loki grinned.  

Thor returned his grin, but it fell away quickly. “I will return as soon as I have news from Odin. We have convinced the powers here not to make a decision until we have a declaration from Asgard. It could be a few days. In the meantime, stay well, brother.”

Loki nodded. “Thank you for the book.”

As soon as the door closed he moved silently to it. Tracing the frame with a touch of his magic to seal the room from any sound escaping, he stood back and waited for someone to rush in. Nothing happened. Magically he rid himself of the clothes he wore, replacing them with soft silk pants and a tunic. Again, no one rushed in. He moved to you, waving a hand over your body clothing you in much the same way. He waited. No one intruded.  

Stark was true to his word.  

Loki sat beside you, smoothing back your hair and waking your from the Dreamless Sleep. Your eyes opened slowly. The feeling of rich silk on your skin made you smile. Then you realized it was not how you fell asleep.

“Did you change my clothes?” You asked quietly, a little shocked.

Loki smiled. “Yes, pet. With magic. I assure you, nothing inappropriate took place.”

“Magic?” You sat up. “And I missed it?”

“You will have plenty opportunity.” Loki’s long delicate fingers cupped your face. “Stark has managed to blind SHIELD from seeing us for a short time. Your words appeared to have an impact.”

“Oh.” You breathed, just staring at his strong angular features. The wick sharp eyes looked back, turning soft and sorrowful. “Oh. So we’re...” Your chest felt tight. The tension behind your eyes made them burn. “We’re actually alone.”

“I have cast a silence spell on the room.” Loki stroked your cheek. “Even the men posted outside would not hear the loudest scream.”

“What if I can’t stop?” You whispered, feeling as if a storm surge continued to grow over you like a tidal wave from a disaster movie.  

“I will be here.” Loki pressed his lips to the skin of your temple.  

It began with silent tears, a trickle of wetness trailing down your cheeks. Soon your lungs would not expand to allow you to breathe. Panic sunk its talons into your chest. Fire burned in your throat. Too many pains, too many aches, tried to claw from your heart at once.  

Loki held you to his chest, whispering quiet assurances to you. “Breathe, my pet. Let it come. You are strong. It will not break you.”

Pain, fear, anger, betrayal boiled up and ate at your throat like acid. Your fingers wound in Loki’s strong grip. “Fuck!”

A sad, rueful chuckle escaped his chest. “Most apt.”

“How? Fuck, Loki! How do you live with this?” You cried. It wouldn’t stop. Wave after wave crashed into you, stealing your breath and wracking your body. Time lost meaning.  

Somehow the room turned dark and you found yourself laying on the bed, curled against Loki’s chest. You held a damp linen handkerchief. The horrid, overwhelming emotions settled. It left you exhausted, raw. Tears still escaped from your tired eyes.  

You tipped your head up, seeing Loki’s face calm and passive. Except his eyes held the evidence his own tears. Dropping your head back to his chest, too tired to wonder how you ended up in the position or to question why it felt so comfortable, you buried your face against his chest.  He wrapped himself tighter around you.

“Why?” Your voice was hoarse. “Why do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Hold on to it all.” Taking a deep breath, it shuddered upon release. “For so long.”

Loki lay silently for a long time. You could imagine he was arguing with himself about whether or not you deserved an answer. So, you decided make the argument for him.

“Loki,” You began slowly. “I know you would never, ever, entertain the idea discussing such a thing with anyone, especially a mortal.” You felt him tense slightly. “But for whatever reason, I was able to help you. It came with a cost, though. I’ve been in your head, and survived. Now, knowing what I know of you, it puts us in a difficult situation.” You took a deep breath. “You can either trust me and have someone, for the first time ever, that really understands. Or you can doubt me and kill me for what I know.”

He lifted your face, to stare into your eyes. Something unidentifiable burned there. The feelings radiating off him were deep and too complex to pin down. Finally, Loki pressed his lips to your forehead and spoke, his voice thick and deep. “I vow that you shall not die by my hand, though what you ask is not something I can answer yet.”

“Fair enough.” You sighed, relaxing back against him. “What time is it?”

“Your breakdown lasted approximately four hours.”  

The absurdity of the way he answered made you giggle.  

“Are you alright?”  

“Yes.” You wiped the last of your tears away. The giggle felt good. “I need to laugh.”

“You need to sleep.” Loki tried to hold you against him.

“No. Tell me a story, something funny, something embarrassing about Thor.”

He sighed, but you could hear the smile in his voice. “Very well. When we were young, Thor took a liking to this particular daughter of one of our father’s generals...”

You weren’t sure when you fell asleep, but Loki brought tears of laughter to your eyes and recited tales told to him by Frigga until you drifted to sleep.  

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[in-tua-deep]

in the double trouble au, which of the siblings are best at telling the "fives" apart when they swap places? also, what hijinks do they get up to? (out and about AND at home!)

GOOD QUESTION and i gave it some thought - my first instinctive reaction was “probably ben tbh” but actually I think it would be the sibling you might least suspect:

Luther.

The Five’s are really good at imitating each other. They have somehow managed to perfect twin speak to the point that several of the siblings are seriously considering experimentation that gave them both telepathy

but the OG Five has been alone for a really really long time. And Baby Five (I’m gonna call him Five Junior or FJ for short for the sake of this post) has just jumped from a time period where on a good day he interacts with his father, his mother, and all his siblings. and on a mission day he interacts with victims, civilians, villains/criminals, journalists, etc. 

They’re good at copying each other. They’re virtually indistinguishable to the untrained eye. But Five... there are certain times he hesitates, where he has to think and root through his memory from a time where he was actually marginally socialized. He pauses, or is uncomfortable, or he doesn’t know what the correct response might be

it’s almost unnoticeable because Five is a very good improviser. Reginald’s greatest compliment of Five was that he’s adaptable. The moments where Five hesitates are small, and he’s perfectly willing to bulldoze over his own discomfort but there’s still that split second of hesitation

and that’s what Luther keys into

and I’m not going to compare 4 years alone to 45 but damn, Luther was up there away from all of humanity. Outside of a small communication system that was presumably set up to go to Reginald only, Luther was cut off from all human contact - and let’s be real from the “please send more food!!” message I doubt they actually talked all that often

and when Luther came back he tried to bully himself into being okay and he just ended up being awkward and putting his foot in his mouth. Luther is very familiar with the “fake it ‘til you make it” methods and just how easily that can crash down around your ears

Luther recognizes the little hesitations because Luther has those same hesitations. Luther also doesn’t know how to interact with people. Him and Five are both tragically out of practice - the only difference is that Luther is a lot worse at covering it up and adapting than his much smaller brother

(even with this added advantage though, Luther is still bad at telling them apart usually?? he still mixes them up but every so often there’s a moment where Luther just is kind of like “ah it’s five not FJ” and he might not even consciously know what is pinging on his radar)

as for hijinks - both Five’s frequently switch places and tag out so you might think you’re taking FJ out for breakfast and he’ll go to the bathroom and tag out with Five and neither of them bring up the fact that they swapped

they tell each other pretty much everything and have quick debriefs throughout the day to fix their early issue of not being able to fake it when one of the others references a conversation the wrong twin took part in

both of them pull things and then blame it on the other (like the various closet raids they go through, and the general theft of other peoples belongings) but there’s a good chance they actually pulled the thing together

they have a lot of fun with outsiders who aren’t aware there are two of them,, they absolutely provide alibis for one another and cover for each other all the time

they’re both very lightfingered and FJ may or may not have gotten his hands on a magic kit which only furthered both twins sleight of hand ability (which they were already well versed in thanks to their powers hello stapler/gun scene from the bank heist) and they have the bad habit of grabbing something and then managing to slip it into the other twins pocket and they go back and forth so that it’s really difficult to catch either Five with stolen contraband on them??

you kind of have to pin them both down at the same time and shake ‘em down if you want to get any real results

they do shit like exit through one door and enter through a completely different one half a second later but the issue is that it’s impossible to tell whether the one entering the room is the same one who exited (spatial jumping powers) or if it’s the other Five who prearranged this uncanny timing with the other

they keep different changes of clothes with them so that people can’t just clock their clothes for the day. or they purposefully wear identical outfits. Or they wear the same outfit but with reversible clothes so it looks like they’re wearing something different but they can quickly switch with ease

there have been times when the adult hargreeves are having a conversation with one brother and then the other just. walks up and picks up the conversation while the original exits stage left to do something

playing “keep away” is a whole new game when it’s played between two teleporting twins with an uncanny ability to predict one another and both with wicked senses of humor. 

don’t get me wrong they don’t always act the same. Sometimes they swap places and pretend to be each other instead of just being indistinguishable. Sometimes it’s a lot to deal with, and Five can’t handle pretending to be FJ for the day (because no matter how much he sometimes wants to wind back the clock, Five isn’t actually a child, he’s been through too much - seen too much - and sometimes that makes it impossible for him to act carefree enough to play teleport tag through the house)

honestly some of their hijinks (like walking up and taking over a conversation or switching places) are a way for FJ to get Five out of a situation when he can see it’s getting overwhelming

(and sometimes it’s Five coming to rescue FJ when FJ realizes all over again that he’s never going to go home and that here and now with these siblings who are grown up and strange is his reality and it fucks him up. Five relates. Five relates more than FJ might actually think)

but for the most part they just highfive one another and tagteam family functions and refuse to let the others stop them. After all, it’s more logical for only one of them to go and get briefed later so they can get twice as much done, right?? right!

half the family finds them hilarious and the other half wants to tear their hair out and more often than not those halves overlap lmao

[camilliar]

I've just reread ~get the wine pairings~ which is one of the best zimbits fics I've ever read and I was wondering if you're currently working/planning any new omgcp fics? I really love your writing 🙈

Ahhhhhhh wow thank you, there are so many Zimbits fics to choose from, and you chose the one I wrote while my OMGCP AO3 account was still a sock I never planned to link to because it was too many kinks pasted together. I’m very flattered. I’m still weirdly pleased with that fic!

To answer you question -- which I’m also very flattered anyone would ask? -- I've got two OMGCP fics that’ll be going up in the next, like, month:

You may have seen me insanely blogging about this AU where everyone’s getting MFAs at Samwell. In theory, ideally, I guess this would be like a loose collaborative series me and @tomatowrites both write in? (If she wants to/has time to?) I’ve very near done with the first fic in this series, like, one to five paragraphs away from being done and passing it on to a beta. It’s a PBJ sex fic set over Labor Day weekend; Bitty thinks he’s getting into one thing (group sex) but he’s actually getting into something else. It doesn’t get that much into the MFA part of things but I hope it does an okay job introducing the general themes around the Parse + Bitty stories in the AU? Lots of ???? because I’m just so excited about this entire thing. Please send me + Tomato asks about MFA stuff, I’m obsessed with and I want everyone else to be, also.

I’m also doing @omgcpheartbreakfest, and that fic is due on August 5 and should be posting ... a week later? Ish? Because it’s a blind fest I ought not divulge too much about it, but it’s an idea I’ve wanted to write out for a while, so I’m looking forward to finishing this over the next week or two.

and then OH GOD this list continues:

After those two I’ll probably switch gears to finish up this infamous South Park fic. Further afield, I did start an Ollie/Wicks fic that could be conceptually interesting but a) what is the audience? and b) do I really want to expend energy on digging into the tone and keeping the tone on point? More problematic is that these characters do not have personalities or even biographical information to transform into a story, so it’s tough to know what their relationship would even be like? I guess what I’m saying is I’m not sure if I want to follow through on this. Earlier today, actually, I took a look at it convinced I was going to scrap it -- but I also felt like there was something there that made me almost wistful for whatever conviction I had for this story when I started it. We’ll see where that goes.

Two big fics I have wanted to write in this fandom for a long, long time, like nearly as long as I’ve been in the fandom:

An AU where Jack’s OD is fatal, and a few years into the future his mother has established a foundation in his memory, to which she’s recruited Parse to sit on the board, which requires that he help fund the foundation. The foundation creates a scholarship for a hockey player at Samwell, and Parse is asked to advise the selection process, which results in Bitty being offered the inaugural award. The problem, however, is that Bitty is terrified of checking and if he doesn’t make it on this team, there’s a chance SMH might ultimately reject the gift -- and if this pilot program fails, Jack’s mom is gonna, like, have a breakdown. So Parse decides to intervene to make sure Bitty doesn’t get cut? Long story short, endgame Bitty/Parse, with the basic tension coming from what everyone’s lost if Jack isn’t in their lives: the team dynamic is totally different! Bitty thinks Jack is a selfish monster who ruined the lives of everyone around him, but Parse maintains that Bitty didn’t know him. The Bob/Alicia relationship is almost irreparably frayed and Parse finds himself in the middle of it because they both refuse to let him go! In a lot of ways it’s a story about Jack, although Jack is very dead for all of it. If done properly I would love to get into some of the tough politics around, like, money in US higher ed and some politics around wealth generally.

I have mentioned a few times that I want to write a “normal” not-edgelord Zimbits fic, and that would be an AU where Jack gets a PhD in history instead of going into the NHL -- so it’s basically canon-divergent from the start of Y2, where Jack decides that, for his own mental health, he can’t do professional hockey. The fic is set over the summer of 2017, at which point Jack is preparing to take his exams, write a dissertation prospectus, and start teaching in the fall. He’s at an impasse with his advisor, however, who doesn’t want him to write a social history of hockey because that’s a second book project, not a dissertation. While that’s happening, Bitty’s just graduated college and moved back in with his parents while Jack tries to find them an apartment in Boston -- which he’s having some trouble doing since Bitty doesn’t have a job lined up and Jack’s income is like, a graduate stipend. The conflicts in this story come from circumstances external to the Jack/Bitty relationship, and center around Jack’s doubts about his ability and desire to follow through on his stated goals, especially considering he’s deeply uncompromising. I’ve seen so many arguments that Jack would be so great at grad school or being a professional academic and it’s like, yes, in some ways, he would be; I can see him doing good archival research, or moving through the degree requirements in a PhD program, because he’s goal-oriented and willing to put the work in. But! He’s fucking awkward and so much of this field is just ... networking? Collaborating? Taking advice? Listening? Taking social cues? He had this idea about what kind of dissertation he was going to do, and why is he being told no? Can Jack take “no”? Can he adapt? A random woman has been showing up to his beer league games -- maybe this degree wasn’t the right path after all?

Then, all the way down at the bottom here, it’s like, I have sooo many incomplete Greerverse and lady Jack fics, many of them in the 500-3k range, but some of them in the 15k range, which is like, wow, that’s a lot of unfinished fic! The most profitable of these would be Jack and Bitty taking a 15-year anniversary vacation traveling around Europe for six weeks, which Jack unceremoniously kicks off by announcing a desire to transition--and then saying nothing about it for the duration of the trip while Bitty tries to work out how he feels about this, never mind what Jack even wants.

Aaaand last and probably also least, I’ve got like 15k each of an a/b/o fic I tried to write for Tomato and another 15k of a fic where a career- ending injury leads Jack to reassess his entire relationship with his body and therefore he winds up getting a little drag-curious, and it was fun writing about like, Jack moping around the house on crutches feeling sorry for himself, but also the fic has an OC who’s a big part of the story and I just didn’t feel that guy or care to write about him so I quit! Maybe I should scrap those things, along with the rest of this mpreg fic.

So that’s where I’m at ficwise right now! Who knows a) when the things further down this list would see the light of days, and b) which other crazy ideas will crop up that I have to write in the interim?

Thank you so much for asking! I love chatting about my fic, please ask any time.

[everything-laito]

damn the brain be out here going BRRRRRR here’s the Laito and Cordelia Analysis (with a little bit of Karl sprinkled in) Part III

wow my fingers are freezing but my brain sure isn't! 

aaaanyways, iiiiiit’s trauma time!!! Am I a productive member of society by writing these analyses? No. Do I gain anything by writing them? Kinda, my brain gets exercised and they’re fun to research for. But if you haven’t read the first part or the second part for some reason (I recommend reading them in order), there they are. 

Once again, trigger warnings still apply; mainly about trauma, isolation, etc 

I’m gonna talk about the trauma and effects it had on Laito and to attempt to extrapolate why he is the way he is. I have a lot of examples I want to go over and stuff to talk about, so I think the trauma part is going to be split between two (or maybe three) parts. I also have a little bit to say about Karlheinz.

As always, big ass rant under the cut! 

Section 6: Neuroplasticity and Trauma

Oh???? More science vernacular??? You BET! Ok, neuroplasticity. I know I’ve talked about it on this blog. But, I seriously doubt that there is a madlad who has read all of my analyses (speaking of which, I should update the master list lmao) and I don’t expect anyone to do that LOL! Anyways, this neurological concept is the ability of neurons to adapt to certain circumstances or stimuli by creating new neurological pathways (through synapses). This basically relates to memory and learning. It’s why we don’t stay the same person as we grow and develop. It’s responsible from mindset changes to response to traumatic events. It plays a huge part in trauma, which is why “repressed memories” occur as well. 

Trauma, taken from Psychology Today, is defined as: 

...the experience of severe psychological distress following any terrible or life-threatening event. Sufferers may develop emotional disturbances such as extreme anxiety, anger, sadness, survivor’s guilt, or PTSD.

It’s a basic definition. And although I’d assume people would know what trauma is already, but knowing the lexical definition of something can be good to know before going into it. 

Obviously, Laito has trauma, there’s literally no refuting that. But, the point I’m getting at, is the reason why he is the way he is today is because of neuroplasticity. As previously stated, we are going to assume the DL vampire brain works similarly or the same as a human brain. So, because of the stress put upon the brain (Cordelia’s actions and Laito’s general upbringing in a stress filled household), Laito’s brain was rewired (neuroplasticity). This section doesn’t really have much new information, but I wanted to give a baseline since there’s many people who don’t know what neuroplasticity is.

Laito’s definitely different than what he was as a kid. He still kind of had his smarts, and might have been  but as we’ve deducted from the first part of this series, he might have been groomed. On top of that, the brain is easily moldable when you’re a child (which is why grooming makes sense for Laito’s case), and continues to snip brain cells off and form new connections. 

Section 7: Little intermission about Karlheinz 

I know I haven’t really talked about Karlheinz yet. So this will be the section that I do it in. I know this part is about Laito’s trauma, but it’s so hard to not just weave other characters into it. Nothing is stand-alone, which is why it was so hard for me to plan this out. I was debating about saving this for another analysis, but I feel like it fits. 

I referenced this in Part II, Section 5 of this analysis series. Basically, Karlheinz throws Laito into the dungeon and locks him up. Not Karlheinz personally, but he ordered someone to do it. We don’t explicitly know why, but there’s several implications. A huge one is that it was part of Karlheinz’ experiment. Before Dark Fate, I was like “wait, so did Karl find out about Laito/Cordelia? And got like jealous or was like ‘nah this shit fucked up no thanks’?” I was really scratching my head on that. But in Dark Fate, you find that Karlheinz knew about Cordelia and Laito, and even really wanted it to happen. Which is all sorts of fucked up. This really put Laito in for a loop. Here’s a scene from Dark Fate: 

Laito: That woman always, always believed in Karlheinz. Laito: She believed he married her because he loved her, wanted her. That’s why she was sure that one day... he will give his love only to her.  Laito: But she was tricked. She wasn’t loved from the start... Laito: -And I’m a victim of this unbelievable mistake... That’s how it is. Laito: I was treated as a vent for her feelings. Yui: ...Laito-kun... Laito: I’m sure he knew that something like this will happen... He is a god after all... Laito: I was hoping that... He just overlooked it up until now... Laito: But... I was naive.  Laito: I was only planned a scapegoat. 

God, when I played this, that just freaking struck me to my core. That’s so awful. Ironically... Karlheinz probably has some high level of emotional intelligence. I don’t believe he could be labeled as a sociopath, considering he has this high level understanding of pathos. He’s not god in a sense that he controls everyone individually himself. He’s so good at manipulation that he basically creates fate itself (whether you believe in it or not). He’s generally intelligent and cunning, and it also just helps with the fact that he’s immortal and can time travel. He knows cause and effect by now, and I believe Lost Eden said something about how he’s done so many different “timelines.” 

The definition of a god in a philosophical sense can be broken down into three words: omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. More wicked cool jargon! Yay! Here’s what they mean for extra clarification:

Omniscient: All knowing Omnipresent: All seeing Omnipotent: All doing

Sure Karlheinz doesn’t absolutely know everything, nor can see everything, and he definitely has limits to his power, but he has gained knowledge through living for so many years and time traveling; he has familiars which add to the whole “all seeing” part; and he has a lot of power. So basically, in the most semi-”realistic” sense, it would definitely be the closest being to any kind of god.

Karlheinz is probably the reason why Laito himself has such contempt towards religion, and the existence of a god in general. Sure, the boys are like “that shit’s made up by humans” in general, but it would make sense for Laito himself to have that specific hatred. It makes sense that these vampires would be like “oh that’s made up by humans” when they’ve been around forever and have seen multiple religions come and go. (I’m mainly talking about in DL’s lore case, not starting a religious argument; please don’t take it as such––just to clarify)

Section 8: Isolation

Originally, the previous part was going to be about Laito’s isolation being locked up. However, I went off the rails and it turned into that little intermission. This is going to be a shorter section, but I still wanted to talk about, and it will weave into the next section. 

There is no implications about how long Laito was locked up (and tortured) in the dungeon. There’s also no implications about why he was tortured. But torture and isolation puts such stress on the brain that there’s definitely going to be some kind of outcome if persisting for a good period of time. So let’s take a look at what that does to a person. 

Once again, taking this with a grain of salt. I imagine vampires don’t need to rely on social interaction as much as humans do, considering they live forever. But we don’t know. However, throwing Laito into a state of isolation implies that it would be some type of torture or harsh punishment for a vampire, which therefore implies that social interaction is a necessity for emotional function. It’s just sound, inductive logic. 

So now, as for isolation, I’m using this article as reference. It’s a pretty interesting one to read. Here’s another extensive article as well. Basically isolation can cause:

Depression/anxiety

Immune system deficiencies (basically more likely to get physically ill)

Sleep cycle changes (if put underground or with limited natural light)

Hallucinations

Paranoia

Issues with processing information and more susceptible to persuasion/manipulation

We have no clue if Laito’s experience fits all of these. Also, the second one can be crossed out because vampires in DL can’t get physically sick in the way we can. Also, unsure about the sleep cycle stuff considering they are used to being in the dark. Hallucinations and paranoia can’t be crossed off nor proven. 

Being isolated physically and mentally exhausts the mind, which is why it’s also a way of torture. Laito implies that he was tortured with physical devices, but regardless, it’s still stress on the mind. This type of stress definitely goes along with what was mentioned with neuroplasticity and trauma, which also supports the last bullet point: issues processing information and being more susceptible to persuasion/manipulation. Take this flashback from Maniac Prologue in HDB that I used in Part II section 5 (but here’s even more context):

Laito: ーー Let me go!! Let me out of here! Butler: I can’t, young lord. We’ve received strict orders from your father. I am deeply sorry, but please stay put for a while. Laito: What’s the point in having me chained up in here!? Butler: ーーI am very sorry. Laito: Hahahaha…You stupid old man! Do you think that this will make repent!? How foolish! That demon! Has his brain finally rotten from spending too much time with humans!? ー Cordelia appears Cordelia: ー Oh? Laito: …!? Have you come to save me? Cordelia: Oh dear. Ufufu…I’m sorry Laito, that isn’t it. Laito: Eh? Richter: ー Why are you here? Laito: …That’s my line. Cordelia: Okay, okay. No fighting! More importantly, Richter…Come here. Laito: …!? Cordelia: Nnn…Hey, Laito. You are a good boy. Laito: …!! Cordelia: Right, Laito? Laito: Yeah, that’s right. I’m…I’m a good boy after all.  ーー Besides, I’m the type of person who only get more aroused from this kind of thing.

Although I also use this to support the whole Stockholm syndrome point, this could also be supported with the trauma isolation also holds. His mind is being re-molded into the facade he holds. Also, note the whole “do you think this will make me repent?!” part. Just a very interesting thing. The word “repent” implies that there’s something to feel guilty about or the person knows that what they’ve done is bad. It just goes to show that Laito has some part of guilt or moral compass still in tact. 

You can also argue that this scene was when Laito just got locked up, or he’s been here for a while. Either way, he could have also been socially isolated before this too, just hanging around Cordelia like it’s implied when he was a child. Remember the whole not being in bed 9/10 times when he was a child? Yeah, controlled social isolation. We also rarely see Laito with other characters in his flashbacks. I don’t believe we see him with his brothers in any of his flashbacks from what I can recall; he’s usually with Cordelia. Just implies (to me) that he’s around her a lot. And being locked up is also a more extreme case of that, which would mold the brain even more. 

I know that was a LOT to process and read. I sure hope this still is cohesive for you all. I’m pretty bad at organizing this kind of stuff; it’s a bit difficult since it all just goes together. Which, kudos on the writers of DL, because that’s just good writing. I was going to put something about gaslighting in this part, but that might be too long, so I’m going to make that a separate part or include it in the next part. 

If you have any questions, feel free to just put it in the inbox. I’m planning on making the last part of this series answering all the Laito/Cordelia questions I’ve received, or just general questions pertaining to this analysis in general, whether it be tangential questions or clarifying questions. 

Hope you all are still enjoying this ride as much as I am!  -Corn

[johnandrasjaqobis]

Okay I was reminded to ramble about Fjord today and I have the time and the internet now SO

(disclaimer 1: spoilers for recent CR Events re: Fjord, obviously, proceed at your own risk)

((disclaimer 2: I don’t see much of the fandom besides art so this ramble might have happened in a similar way elsewhere but I’m gonna do it anyway))

with that said, under the cut because as usual I’m long-winded

re: Fjord and paladin oaths

I know it will be two more levels from now before it happens, because Fjord is still just a baby level 1 paladin, but in two more levels he hits the first milestone and takes an oath. Having two paladins of my own (which makes them sound like cats or something) I have stared at the different options for oaths at length, and I stared at them a while longer last night when I realized Fjord would have to take one himself.

this is all, of course, assuming that Matt won’t homebrew one for Travis given these bizarre circumstances of a multiclass, which he totally could pull off but I don’t know if he’d want to throw yet another untested thing into the mix. or maybe he would, who knows, anyway

Judging by their tenets, a few can be ruled out with some certainty -- he’s obviously no oathbreaker at this point, treachery doesn’t have tenets but seems a little dark for even this morally ambiguous squad, same with conquest, and others like the crown and devotion call for following the law and focus on honesty which like.......this is a man who spent a stretch as a pirate pretty eagerly and lies his way out of so many situations. Anything is possible when you decidedly throw off the control of a creepy sea monster but it seems doubtful.

Which leaves the two I’m putting my money on but can’t decide which seems more likely.

Oath of the Ancients is nature-based, which made it my first thought because Wildmama and all that, it fits her very well. The tenets fit her, too;

Kindle the Light. Through your acts of mercy, kindness, and forgiveness, kindle the light of hope in the world, beating back despair.

Shelter the Light. Where there is good, beauty, love, and laughter in the world, stand against the wickedness that would swallow it. Where life flourishes, stand against the forces that would render it barren.

Preserve Your Own Light. Delight in song and laughter, in beauty and art. If you allow the light to die in your own heart, you can't preserve it in the world.

Be the Light. Be a glorious beacon for all who live in despair. Let the light of your joy and courage shine forth in all your deeds.

and then on a Very Different note, there’s the Oath of Vengeance, which is more focused on administering justice;

Fight the Greater Evil. Faced with a choice of fighting my sworn foes or combating a lesser evil, I choose the greater evil.

No Mercy for the Wicked. Ordinary foes might win my mercy, but my sworn enemies do not.

By Any Means Necessary. My qualms can't get in the way of exterminating my foes.

Restitution. If my foes wreak ruin on the world, it is because I failed to stop them. I must help those harmed by their misdeeds.

They are like...very different oaths, extremely different focuses and strategies. But at this point, with Fjord still so new to this particular direction of things, I feel like there’s a pretty even chance of him going with either. And I think it’s going to rely a lot on his feelings with this whole paladin thing and his goals with Uk’otoa

bc it’s not gone. and it’s almost certainly pissed it lost one of its more powerful warlocks to such a different path.

Fjord’s got a new adopted mom -- one who will, definitely expect things of him herself, but those things aren’t likely to involve unleashing an eldritch horror upon the world. She seems to genuinely love her kids, and she’s been so welcoming to this new one that kind of stumbled into her presence, still with this remnant of the darkness he used to serve clinging to him, and she knows (and told him) that it’s likely he’ll never fully be rid of that. He found his powers from something unspeakably dark, and that will linger, but now he has the opportunity to see the alternative and get thrust into the light that the Wildmother is so dedicated to.

Hence the Oath of the Ancients.

He might have only started to touch the edge of the potential Uk’otoa’s powers held, but even that edge was dark. Now that he’s seeing the other side, he might be determined to -- as the tenets say -- cultivate that light as much as possible. Dive head-first into the brightness that nature can hold, embrace the sunlight on the sea more than the storms. Preserve his own light that’s been stubbornly holding out (with so much help from the rest of the Nein) even with the previous master that would have delighted in snuffing it. 

Look at his past, look at Uk’otoa, and do a stubborn 180 straight into the light, because now he has the opportunity to, and he’s going to walk with the Wildmother to spread it into the darkest shadows the Nein sees on their travels.

but on the other hand

Fjord is a fighter, always has been. Even if he’s fighting with his words, it’s been necessary pretty much his entire life.

and then he was pulled into this pact while on the brink of death, he was strong enough to garner the attention of this thing that decided Fjord was a prime candidate to help it break free.

He did not pick this pact, not really. Not willingly. He was picked, and he adapted as he always has, worked with what he had and embraced the power that came with it because hey, it’s real useful when you’re suddenly with this group that attracts danger every day.

And then he was used. Got back to the sea just to find out that his patron wanted out, and it was going to carefully prod and direct its followers to do it. And he got real close to actually doing it.

and then didn’t.

and Uk’otoa was pissed about it.

There was the whole realization that like, okay, maybe relying on this eldritch horror for powers isn’t such a good idea. And there was a volcano and a melted sword, and through a combination of good luck (would anything other than a volcano have really destroyed the pact weapon?) and a whole lot of recklessness, he severed the tie.

Fjord got a second chance. He did not unleash Uk’otoa, he got out of his pact (as far as any of us know), and he found someone that happily took him in and restored his powers. But he hadn’t picked that first route in the first place.

He was picked, and what’s to stop Uk’otoa from picking more people? People who won’t be so lucky, or just as likely, ones who won’t see anything wrong with setting this thing free?

What’s to stop other things, maybe even stronger than Uk’otoa, from doing something similar?

maybe Fjord is to stop them. because he’s the one who’s seen both sides, one more willingly than the other, and he knows what lurks in the depths of those seas, and it should not.

Look at his past, look at Uk’otoa, and say fuck you, you used me, but I won’t let you use anyone else. Walk with the Wildmother as an avenger for those who didn’t have a choice and bring proper justice down on the things that warped the unwilling, because if he doesn’t, who will?

tl;dr: my money is on either Oath of the Ancients or Oath of Vengeance come Fjord’s third paladin level, but which one entirely depends on his view of this new path and what he wants to accomplish with it, and right now they seem equally likely.